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1
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:07,600
[rock music]
2
00:00:21,067 --> 00:00:22,567
Morning.
3
00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:24,700
Oh God, we did, didn't we?
4
00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:26,700
You are too easy, Mark.
5
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,233
You need to work on that.
6
00:00:28,333 --> 00:00:31,700
Um, I wanted an
early night last night.
7
00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:34,967
I wasn't planning on a bunk
down memory lane either.
8
00:00:35,067 --> 00:00:35,900
Charming.
9
00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,100
Your words.
10
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:39,200
This is never happening again.
11
00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:41,133
[sighs]
12
00:00:41,233 --> 00:00:42,433
Can you pass me
some pants, please?
13
00:00:42,533 --> 00:00:43,167
I need to storm off.
14
00:00:43,267 --> 00:00:45,633
[upbeat rock music]
15
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:08,200
[groans]
16
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:14,633
Oh.
17
00:01:17,733 --> 00:01:19,033
[chopping]
18
00:01:19,133 --> 00:01:22,433
Morning, gorgeous.
19
00:01:22,533 --> 00:01:23,667
It's David.
20
00:01:23,767 --> 00:01:24,967
Oh yeah, I remember.
21
00:01:25,067 --> 00:01:26,933
It just feels weird.
22
00:01:27,033 --> 00:01:29,333
It feels like I've
been here before.
23
00:01:29,433 --> 00:01:34,633
I would definitely remember
you, and Mr. and Mrs. Thatcher.
24
00:01:34,733 --> 00:01:35,533
Aspirin?
25
00:01:35,633 --> 00:01:41,133
Yeah
26
00:01:41,233 --> 00:01:43,800
David, is it OK if you pick
your mum up from the hospital
27
00:01:43,900 --> 00:01:45,467
this after--
28
00:01:45,567 --> 00:01:47,700
Bonnie?
29
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:49,567
Michael.
30
00:01:49,667 --> 00:01:52,000
Dad?
31
00:01:52,100 --> 00:01:54,567
[rock music]
32
00:01:57,033 --> 00:01:59,033
[door shuts]
33
00:02:04,133 --> 00:02:05,400
[panting]
34
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:06,333
Shit!
35
00:02:10,967 --> 00:02:13,400
[groovy romantic music]
36
00:02:22,367 --> 00:02:23,133
Madam.
37
00:02:23,233 --> 00:02:24,633
What's going on?
38
00:02:24,733 --> 00:02:26,000
I wanted to surprise you.
39
00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:27,767
What happened to waking
me up with a [inaudible]..
40
00:02:27,867 --> 00:02:31,000
Well, I don't feel like
that surprises you anymore,
41
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:34,700
and you deserve
better than that.
42
00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:36,433
[violently rips blanket off]
- What's going on?
43
00:02:36,533 --> 00:02:37,400
Laura, calm down!
44
00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:39,233
Who is she?
Are you filming this?
45
00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:41,200
No, I just want
to look after you.
46
00:02:41,300 --> 00:02:42,700
Why are you dressed nice?
47
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:44,400
Will you shut up and let me
treat you proper, you stupid
48
00:02:44,500 --> 00:02:45,933
cow?
49
00:02:46,033 --> 00:02:47,233
Wow, Gary.
50
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,100
Look, I've made this
for you because you're
51
00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:54,167
fit, and always ornery.
52
00:02:54,267 --> 00:02:56,267
You take a bite first.
53
00:02:56,367 --> 00:02:58,267
[wooshing]
54
00:02:59,767 --> 00:03:00,833
I think it's a new low.
55
00:03:00,933 --> 00:03:02,800
I had to do the sprint of shame.
56
00:03:02,900 --> 00:03:04,033
I've shagged Leads
and his father.
57
00:03:04,133 --> 00:03:05,433
I'm lapping myself.
58
00:03:05,533 --> 00:03:07,667
It's either become a lesbian
or I move to Manchester.
59
00:03:07,767 --> 00:03:09,500
Are you trying to tell
me you've shagged Gary?
60
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:10,500
What?
No.
61
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:11,833
God, the very
thought of Gary makes
62
00:03:11,933 --> 00:03:12,833
me want to sew up my vagina.
63
00:03:12,933 --> 00:03:14,067
Good.
64
00:03:14,167 --> 00:03:18,167
Sorry, just, he's
been weired like nice,
65
00:03:18,267 --> 00:03:20,733
and he wants to do something
special tonight because he
66
00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:21,867
wants to ask me something.
67
00:03:21,967 --> 00:03:23,100
Excuse-e-mua?
68
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,300
Yeah, and this was
all after breakfast,
69
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,200
flowers, and a fanny massage.
70
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:27,967
Oh my God, he wants you to.
71
00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:29,500
Piss on his face, I know.
72
00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,133
It's going to come up
eventually, always does.
73
00:03:31,233 --> 00:03:32,433
Does it though?
74
00:03:32,533 --> 00:03:34,600
Babes, he's going to
ask you to marry him.
75
00:03:34,700 --> 00:03:35,500
Shut up.
76
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:36,567
Sounds like it, mate.
77
00:03:36,667 --> 00:03:37,500
But it's Gary.
78
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:38,833
I know it's not ideal.
79
00:03:38,933 --> 00:03:40,233
I thought I'd end
up marrying someone
80
00:03:40,333 --> 00:03:42,500
with a job and a normal
amount of pubic hair.
81
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:43,267
Hang on.
82
00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:44,967
Do you mean you'd say yes?
83
00:03:45,067 --> 00:03:46,433
Shut up.
84
00:03:46,533 --> 00:03:49,233
Anyway, you need money to
get married, and I'm brasic.
85
00:03:49,333 --> 00:03:51,167
Malcolm still hasn't
paid us this week.
86
00:03:51,267 --> 00:03:52,867
Meg, you did give our
invoices in, didn't you?
87
00:03:52,967 --> 00:03:53,967
What?
88
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,200
You said you were
going to do it.
89
00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:56,767
I'll make you [inaudible].
90
00:03:56,867 --> 00:03:58,200
Now we've got no
money for the weekend.
91
00:03:58,300 --> 00:03:59,867
How am I going to
get any action?
92
00:03:59,967 --> 00:04:01,400
Action?
93
00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:03,633
There are literally no more
fish left in the sea, Bonnie.
94
00:04:03,733 --> 00:04:05,700
I'd hate to come across
all Hugh [inaudible]
95
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,767
but you've got to let
the stocks replenish.
96
00:04:08,867 --> 00:04:10,033
Technically, this
is an emergency.
97
00:04:10,133 --> 00:04:11,867
So Laura, we can tip
into your savings.
98
00:04:11,967 --> 00:04:12,867
If you can find them.
99
00:04:12,967 --> 00:04:14,667
I got Gary to hide them from me.
100
00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:15,567
I bit him once.
101
00:04:15,667 --> 00:04:16,567
Still won't tell me.
102
00:04:16,667 --> 00:04:18,233
Maybe this is
exactly what we need,
103
00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:20,467
a night to reconnect as women.
104
00:04:20,567 --> 00:04:22,900
Not spend money,
not chase trouser.
105
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,600
Yeah, we can talk about
Laura being a wife.
106
00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:25,533
Shut up!
107
00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:32,233
- Oh, hey
- Hi.
108
00:04:32,333 --> 00:04:34,833
- You all right?
- Yeah.
109
00:04:34,933 --> 00:04:36,600
What's in the box, Scott?
110
00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:37,533
Um, it's--
111
00:04:37,633 --> 00:04:39,733
What's in the box?
112
00:04:39,833 --> 00:04:41,467
Seven.
113
00:04:41,567 --> 00:04:42,200
Brad Pitt.
114
00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:43,133
What's in the box!
115
00:04:43,233 --> 00:04:44,233
[glass clanking]
116
00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:45,367
Oh, seriously,
what's in the box?
117
00:04:45,467 --> 00:04:47,100
I'll replace it.
118
00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:48,200
Don't worry.
119
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:50,800
I've got a box you can have.
120
00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:52,567
Um, not my fanny.
121
00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:53,633
Wow, um.
122
00:04:53,733 --> 00:04:54,633
Sorry.
123
00:04:54,733 --> 00:04:55,833
Got this sweet little granny.
124
00:04:55,933 --> 00:04:57,367
She's dropped a
tenner at the bus stop
125
00:04:57,467 --> 00:04:59,000
so I had to wait until
she got on the bus
126
00:04:59,100 --> 00:05:00,700
before I could
pick the tenner up.
127
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,900
Bingo.
Oh, oh hello.
128
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,067
You must be neighbor Scott.
129
00:05:06,167 --> 00:05:07,967
Yeah, I guess I am.
130
00:05:08,067 --> 00:05:10,233
You must be the famous
granny exploiter.
131
00:05:10,333 --> 00:05:12,033
Oh, you've heard of me.
Are you in the trade?
132
00:05:12,133 --> 00:05:13,033
- Right.
- I'm afraid not.
133
00:05:13,133 --> 00:05:15,567
I'm training to be a counselor.
134
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:16,533
It's boring, really.
135
00:05:16,633 --> 00:05:19,367
No, it's fascinating.
136
00:05:19,467 --> 00:05:20,133
I'm Bonnie.
137
00:05:20,233 --> 00:05:21,033
It's nice to meet you.
138
00:05:21,133 --> 00:05:22,433
OK.
Um--
139
00:05:22,533 --> 00:05:24,300
So what are you going
to do with your spoils?
140
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:25,533
I'm going to go to the bar.
141
00:05:25,633 --> 00:05:28,133
I'm a sucker for gin
and good company.
142
00:05:28,233 --> 00:05:31,333
Well, I can help
you maybe tomorrow.
143
00:05:31,433 --> 00:05:32,267
Can't.
144
00:05:32,367 --> 00:05:33,267
What?
145
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:34,933
Can't tomorrow
because of the thing.
146
00:05:35,033 --> 00:05:35,933
What thing?
147
00:05:36,033 --> 00:05:37,867
(STAMMERS) The girls night in.
148
00:05:37,967 --> 00:05:38,767
Remember?
149
00:05:38,867 --> 00:05:39,800
Ha!
150
00:05:39,900 --> 00:05:41,133
Yes, you promised.
Remember?
151
00:05:41,233 --> 00:05:42,167
Oh, hey guys.
152
00:05:42,267 --> 00:05:44,300
Hey, corridor party.
153
00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:45,533
Hey, Mark.
154
00:05:45,633 --> 00:05:47,700
Can I leave you my spare
key later for the handyman?
155
00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,200
Oh, careful, he might sneak
in while you're sleeping
156
00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:51,300
and give you head.
157
00:05:55,667 --> 00:05:58,567
Um, of course.
158
00:05:58,667 --> 00:05:59,633
Whenever you like.
159
00:05:59,733 --> 00:06:01,900
Just--
160
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,267
Ha!
161
00:06:03,367 --> 00:06:06,767
Oh God, neighbor Scott
does not do him justice.
162
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,467
From now on, he
is hot Scott, OK?
163
00:06:08,567 --> 00:06:09,200
[scoffs]
164
00:06:09,300 --> 00:06:10,133
You think he's hot?
165
00:06:10,233 --> 00:06:11,600
Are you kidding?
166
00:06:11,700 --> 00:06:14,000
Yorkshire water should put
a reservoir in my gasket.
167
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:15,167
That is disgusting.
168
00:06:15,267 --> 00:06:16,600
Why did you
[inaudible] me, meg?
169
00:06:16,700 --> 00:06:17,967
I did not.
170
00:06:18,067 --> 00:06:20,200
See, if my friend cousin
in serious vaginal need,
171
00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:22,767
might I had, had sizzling
chemistry with a man
172
00:06:22,867 --> 00:06:24,033
in a corridor, I
would never have done
173
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,733
what you just did out there.
[scoffs]
174
00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:28,067
Well, what if your friend
cousins saw him in the corridor
175
00:06:28,167 --> 00:06:30,467
first, and was
employing subtle reeling
176
00:06:30,567 --> 00:06:33,133
him in slowly techniques,
which you just shat all over.
177
00:06:33,233 --> 00:06:34,733
Well, I'd tell my friend
cousin that she probably
178
00:06:34,833 --> 00:06:37,100
only wants corridor man because
I thought he was a hot potato.
179
00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:38,800
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, really.
180
00:06:38,900 --> 00:06:40,367
Well then your
friend cousin was
181
00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:42,567
foolish to assume that her plans
for future romantic happiness
182
00:06:42,667 --> 00:06:44,200
might be more important
than you getting
183
00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:45,967
your skanky leg over again!
184
00:06:46,067 --> 00:06:47,533
[gasps]
185
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,867
[stomps]
186
00:06:50,967 --> 00:06:53,000
[scuffling]
187
00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:56,333
[thud]
188
00:06:56,433 --> 00:06:57,333
Hi, Scott.
189
00:06:57,433 --> 00:06:58,367
Hi, Scott.
190
00:06:58,467 --> 00:06:59,800
Bye, Scott.
191
00:06:59,900 --> 00:07:01,233
Bye, Scott.
192
00:07:01,333 --> 00:07:03,400
Bye.
193
00:07:03,500 --> 00:07:06,000
Actually, I'm
not going anywhere.
194
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:07,933
Eh, yeah, we were just
about to go for a beer.
195
00:07:08,033 --> 00:07:08,833
All right, cool.
196
00:07:08,933 --> 00:07:10,633
Play me off.
197
00:07:10,733 --> 00:07:12,333
Talk to me.
198
00:07:12,433 --> 00:07:13,333
[chuckles]
199
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,067
No way.
200
00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:15,767
I'm gluten intolerant too.
201
00:07:15,867 --> 00:07:16,733
God, you were lucky.
202
00:07:16,833 --> 00:07:18,467
I found out the hard way.
203
00:07:18,567 --> 00:07:21,200
Can't believe you make your
own bread, that's so clever.
204
00:07:21,300 --> 00:07:23,033
It's not as hard
as people think.
205
00:07:23,133 --> 00:07:24,033
I can show you if you like.
206
00:07:24,133 --> 00:07:25,600
Yes.
Wow, yes.
207
00:07:25,700 --> 00:07:26,600
Yes, yes, I would like.
208
00:07:26,700 --> 00:07:27,967
When, when?
209
00:07:28,067 --> 00:07:29,567
Tomorrow-- tomorrow--
tomorrow-- tomorrow night?
210
00:07:29,667 --> 00:07:32,000
How's tomorrow night, say?
211
00:07:32,100 --> 00:07:33,700
Isn't tomorrow
night girls night?
212
00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:34,967
Oh, damn it.
-
213
00:07:35,067 --> 00:07:36,267
How about Tuesday?
214
00:07:36,367 --> 00:07:38,067
What's happening Tuesday?
[glasses clinking]
215
00:07:38,167 --> 00:07:41,933
Oh, just um, going to
bake some really good bread.
216
00:07:42,033 --> 00:07:44,600
Oh God, grief is such torture.
217
00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:47,933
Oh God, it grips my body like
a thousand fingering hands.
218
00:07:48,033 --> 00:07:49,733
Oh Gods, Steven!
219
00:07:49,833 --> 00:07:51,500
Jesus, This what's happening?
220
00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:53,333
Steven is dead!
221
00:07:53,433 --> 00:07:54,167
Dead!
222
00:07:54,267 --> 00:07:55,600
Shh, deep breaths.
223
00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:56,700
Who is Steven?
224
00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:58,167
Your rabbit, Steven?
225
00:07:58,267 --> 00:07:59,667
He was murdered.
226
00:07:59,767 --> 00:08:01,133
When you were 11.
227
00:08:01,233 --> 00:08:04,867
I just, I need to be held.
228
00:08:04,967 --> 00:08:06,567
That's not very professional.
229
00:08:06,667 --> 00:08:09,000
Every case is different.
230
00:08:09,100 --> 00:08:11,333
Can I have a gin
and tonic, please?
231
00:08:11,433 --> 00:08:13,667
Oh no, I don't have any money.
232
00:08:22,633 --> 00:08:24,500
[romantic music]
233
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:37,833
What are you doing?
234
00:08:37,933 --> 00:08:39,033
Don't do it.
235
00:08:39,133 --> 00:08:41,000
I'm fluffing the
cushion, I'm sorry.
236
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,833
OK.
Carry on.
237
00:08:42,933 --> 00:08:44,267
You're fucking mental.
238
00:08:44,367 --> 00:08:47,733
Yes, I am, and mental people
are unpredictable, Gary.
239
00:08:47,833 --> 00:08:50,900
So don't ask me anything stupid.
240
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:51,900
I mean it.
241
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,667
Choose your words carefully.
242
00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:58,100
OK, so, you are here a lot.
243
00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,467
What's your point?
244
00:08:59,567 --> 00:09:02,733
Well, I thought maybe
you could like live here,
245
00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:03,633
officially.
246
00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:06,067
You know, move in.
247
00:09:06,167 --> 00:09:08,300
Put your name on the
tenancy, pay rent.
248
00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:10,300
Oh my god, you want money.
249
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:11,867
No, it's not about that.
250
00:09:11,967 --> 00:09:14,800
Oh, that is fucking charming.
251
00:09:14,900 --> 00:09:16,367
Oh, it all makes sense now.
252
00:09:16,467 --> 00:09:18,900
Cleaning the flat, this dirt,
letting me have the skins.
253
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:19,833
No, Laura.
254
00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:21,633
I want us to live together.
255
00:09:21,733 --> 00:09:23,167
Cheap bastard.
256
00:09:23,267 --> 00:09:24,767
I thought you were
going to ask me to--
257
00:09:24,867 --> 00:09:26,267
What?
258
00:09:26,367 --> 00:09:27,567
So all this has just been
about getting the money, is it?
259
00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:30,467
Yeah, you think I'm
some sort of cash pig.
260
00:09:30,567 --> 00:09:31,733
Cash pig?
261
00:09:31,833 --> 00:09:33,333
Get me my savings.
262
00:09:33,433 --> 00:09:34,200
I'm leaving.
263
00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:35,533
I can't do that.
264
00:09:35,633 --> 00:09:36,600
I will bite again, Gary.
265
00:09:36,700 --> 00:09:37,800
Any excuse.
266
00:09:37,900 --> 00:09:42,767
No, I can't because
I borrowed it, OK?
267
00:09:42,867 --> 00:09:45,667
It's been an expensive
month, what with the flowers
268
00:09:45,767 --> 00:09:46,733
and the chicken.
269
00:09:46,833 --> 00:09:49,567
Oh, you little shit, Gary.
270
00:09:49,667 --> 00:09:50,967
We are over.
271
00:09:51,067 --> 00:09:52,233
Over!
272
00:09:52,333 --> 00:09:54,000
And that includes not
having sex any more
273
00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:54,900
[stomping around]
274
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:58,667
Laura, please!
275
00:09:58,767 --> 00:09:59,567
Mine.
276
00:10:02,467 --> 00:10:05,433
This whole time, he's
a plumbing gold digger.
277
00:10:05,533 --> 00:10:07,967
He's probably spending it
on prostitutes, and gambling,
278
00:10:08,067 --> 00:10:11,333
and massages, and prostitutes.
279
00:10:11,433 --> 00:10:12,967
At least you've
got your girls night.
280
00:10:13,067 --> 00:10:13,867
[scoffs in disgust]
281
00:10:13,967 --> 00:10:15,067
Sounds so shit.
282
00:10:15,167 --> 00:10:16,733
Well, happy to
have now to the boys.
283
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:17,700
No.
284
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:20,267
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
285
00:10:20,367 --> 00:10:22,600
Tomorrow night is a girls night.
286
00:10:22,700 --> 00:10:25,300
What have you got planned?
287
00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:28,433
It's going to be a lot of fun.
288
00:10:28,533 --> 00:10:29,700
[slams things down]
289
00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:33,533
What is the capital of Hungary?
290
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:34,700
Yes, Laura?
291
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,100
Who gives a fuck.
292
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,900
Right, well, if you're
not going to play properly.
293
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,700
What the fuck is this?
294
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,200
Am I in an exam or what?
295
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:43,267
Oh come on, Meg, let's booze.
296
00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:44,900
The bottle of wine is there.
297
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,400
Bottle of wine, singular.
298
00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:47,167
[knocking]
299
00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:48,300
MARK: Can someone get that?
300
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,600
It's Scott.
301
00:10:50,700 --> 00:10:52,867
[thumps on ground]
302
00:10:52,967 --> 00:10:53,767
Hi, Scott.
303
00:10:53,867 --> 00:10:55,733
Hey, Scott.
304
00:10:55,833 --> 00:10:57,800
Whoa, you all right, Meg?
305
00:10:57,900 --> 00:10:59,033
Yeah, just chilling.
306
00:10:59,133 --> 00:11:02,033
MARK: Hey, dude,
sorry about that.
307
00:11:02,133 --> 00:11:03,033
Let's go.
308
00:11:03,133 --> 00:11:04,667
Right, here's the spare keys.
309
00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:05,567
Cheers for that.
310
00:11:05,667 --> 00:11:07,267
No problemy.
311
00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:09,133
Let's leave these girls to it.
312
00:11:09,233 --> 00:11:10,067
Wait, Scott.
313
00:11:10,167 --> 00:11:11,500
Do you want to hang.
314
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,033
Uh, I think I would just
like to get one at the pub
315
00:11:13,133 --> 00:11:14,000
if that's OK.
316
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:15,100
OK, bye.
317
00:11:17,567 --> 00:11:20,667
Listen Bun, I don't want you to
get your hopes up about Scott.
318
00:11:20,767 --> 00:11:21,867
It's just me and him are like--
319
00:11:21,967 --> 00:11:24,467
Never going to fuck.
320
00:11:24,567 --> 00:11:26,967
Actually, he told me he's
got a problem with Gingers.
321
00:11:27,067 --> 00:11:28,133
Yeah, freak him out.
322
00:11:28,233 --> 00:11:30,500
Well, the skin and the hair.
323
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:33,067
Anyway, he's inviting
me over to his flat
324
00:11:33,167 --> 00:11:35,200
on Tuesday to make
sweet and tender
325
00:11:35,300 --> 00:11:36,700
bread on his kitchen counter.
326
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,633
So it's real.
327
00:11:38,733 --> 00:11:39,867
Oh, whatever.
328
00:11:39,967 --> 00:11:41,167
Good luck making
sandwiches without Mark
329
00:11:41,267 --> 00:11:42,600
coming to the picnic.
330
00:11:42,700 --> 00:11:43,633
Bored.
331
00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:45,567
Right, let's start.
332
00:11:45,667 --> 00:11:47,700
I have a list of fun.
333
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:48,900
Oh, Jesus, Meg.
334
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,667
Could we at least
open the wine first?
335
00:11:50,767 --> 00:11:52,100
[glugging]
336
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:53,300
Is that all we had?
337
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:54,967
There's rye beaner
in Mark's cupboard.
338
00:11:55,067 --> 00:11:56,300
Don't dilute it.
339
00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:57,400
[inaudible]
340
00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:58,967
I don't think I've
ever been this bored.
341
00:11:59,067 --> 00:12:00,900
Might just have to have
a wank in the bathroom.
342
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,800
Can we start with
the fun, please?
343
00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:09,233
[crunk music]
344
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:26,500
And open!
345
00:12:29,567 --> 00:12:31,467
[laughing]
346
00:12:31,567 --> 00:12:32,733
[tears up paper]
347
00:12:32,833 --> 00:12:37,000
Spirit, if you have something
to say, show us a sign.
348
00:12:37,100 --> 00:12:39,133
[glass shattering]
349
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,567
Hungry.
[sighs]
350
00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:43,333
(WHISPERS) Bloody hell.
351
00:12:43,433 --> 00:12:44,133
[country music]
352
00:12:44,233 --> 00:12:48,733
Grape vine, and back, rodeo.
353
00:12:48,833 --> 00:12:51,167
Take it back, guys.
354
00:12:51,267 --> 00:12:53,033
[punching music player]
355
00:12:53,133 --> 00:12:53,933
Anything but this.
356
00:12:54,033 --> 00:12:55,167
This is torture.
357
00:12:55,267 --> 00:12:57,733
Fine, have any better ideas?
358
00:12:57,833 --> 00:12:58,900
[interposing voices]
359
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,467
Throwing toilet
paper out the window,
360
00:13:00,567 --> 00:13:03,600
[inaudible] see what's on the
tele, [inaudible] make a stew--
361
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:05,067
BOTH: Go to the pub.
362
00:13:05,167 --> 00:13:08,967
Guys, we don't need men or
money to have a good time.
363
00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:11,900
You just don't want these
puppies near hot Scott.
364
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,433
Well, he's not
into big puppies
365
00:13:13,533 --> 00:13:16,300
or he wouldn't have invited
these puppies around for bread.
366
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:20,033
If those are puppies,
then these are great danes.
367
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:21,233
Whoopsie.
368
00:13:21,333 --> 00:13:23,100
Right, either we're
going out, or I'm
369
00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:25,100
shaving her eyebrows off.
370
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:26,633
Guys, we can achieve this.
371
00:13:26,733 --> 00:13:27,833
We are girls.
372
00:13:27,933 --> 00:13:30,400
This is the night
time and we are in.
373
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:31,900
[sighs]
374
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:32,933
Truth or dare?
375
00:13:33,033 --> 00:13:34,400
All right, truth.
376
00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:37,600
When was the last time you
were finally [inaudible]..
377
00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:38,933
Sex.
378
00:13:39,033 --> 00:13:40,233
Yeah, and if it was
longer than 10 months ago,
379
00:13:40,333 --> 00:13:42,100
you have to do a beaner shot.
380
00:13:44,867 --> 00:13:46,667
Just drink it, Meg.
381
00:13:46,767 --> 00:13:47,567
I can't.
382
00:13:47,667 --> 00:13:48,500
You have to.
383
00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:49,767
There's no booze.
384
00:13:49,867 --> 00:13:56,400
I can't because I had sex
with Mark two nights ago.
385
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:57,400
[chokes]
386
00:13:57,500 --> 00:13:58,700
Oh my god.
387
00:13:58,800 --> 00:13:59,967
All the way in?
388
00:14:00,067 --> 00:14:01,000
All the way in, yeah.
389
00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:01,900
Right.
390
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,133
Serious punishment.
391
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:05,267
The memory alone
is punishment enough.
392
00:14:05,367 --> 00:14:09,567
Give me a break, I'm
still itchy from it.
393
00:14:09,667 --> 00:14:10,933
Sneak into Scott's flat.
394
00:14:11,033 --> 00:14:11,867
What?
395
00:14:11,967 --> 00:14:13,233
Brilliant.
396
00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:16,067
Sneak into Scott's flat,
nick a bottle of booze,
397
00:14:16,167 --> 00:14:17,600
and then lick everything
in his fridge,
398
00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:20,467
and then for that, we
will give you a break.
399
00:14:20,567 --> 00:14:21,767
[keys jangle]
400
00:14:24,467 --> 00:14:27,333
D'oh, shit.
[pop rock music]
401
00:14:31,067 --> 00:14:33,200
Got a fit flat.
402
00:14:33,300 --> 00:14:34,133
I'm on the booze.
403
00:14:34,233 --> 00:14:35,567
Lick the fridge.
404
00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:38,300
Guys, I'm having a really
extreme reaction to this.
405
00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,633
Oh God, I'm panic attacking.
406
00:14:40,733 --> 00:14:42,033
[hyperventilates]
407
00:14:42,133 --> 00:14:44,300
Guys, it's starting to make
me feel physically sick.
408
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:45,600
Bingo.
409
00:14:45,700 --> 00:14:47,133
Oh shit on my face, come
have a look at his history.
410
00:14:47,233 --> 00:14:48,933
How to kill a
mouse humanely, how
411
00:14:49,033 --> 00:14:50,233
to make your Mother's Day card.
412
00:14:50,333 --> 00:14:52,833
God, he sounds lovely.
413
00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:54,000
Oh my god.
414
00:14:54,100 --> 00:14:56,067
So he's fond of
great danes after all.
415
00:14:56,167 --> 00:14:57,333
Big ones.
416
00:14:57,433 --> 00:14:59,400
I really think we
shouldn't be here.
417
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:00,633
[takes a swig]
418
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,033
This is tequila.
419
00:15:02,133 --> 00:15:03,667
You know tequila makes me hurl.
420
00:15:03,767 --> 00:15:05,533
Well, I'm not leaving
until you lick the fridge.
421
00:15:05,633 --> 00:15:07,400
Guys, we are going
to break something.
422
00:15:07,500 --> 00:15:08,400
[gasp]
423
00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:10,333
[shatters]
424
00:15:10,433 --> 00:15:11,733
[pukes]
425
00:15:13,767 --> 00:15:14,733
[thump in the distance]
426
00:15:14,833 --> 00:15:15,733
[muffled voices]
427
00:15:15,833 --> 00:15:17,567
Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
428
00:15:17,667 --> 00:15:18,500
OK, don't panic.
429
00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:19,400
Let's just--
430
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:20,867
[pukes]
431
00:15:20,967 --> 00:15:21,967
Be sick again.
432
00:15:22,067 --> 00:15:22,900
Oh my God.
433
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,500
That's a flat now.
434
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,833
Best night ever.
435
00:15:26,933 --> 00:15:28,167
[giggling]
436
00:15:28,267 --> 00:15:30,400
We have to find a
way to get the puke.
437
00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:31,600
Get the puke?
438
00:15:31,700 --> 00:15:33,200
Shit.
They're coming.
439
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,000
God.
440
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,000
[guys chuckling]
441
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,567
MARK: That is revolting.
442
00:15:39,633 --> 00:15:40,933
Ah, hi.
443
00:15:41,033 --> 00:15:42,933
Thought I heard something.
444
00:15:43,033 --> 00:15:45,133
So do you fancy that
drink now then, Scott?
445
00:15:45,233 --> 00:15:48,067
Eh, I actually go to
make a private phone call,
446
00:15:48,167 --> 00:15:49,233
but yeah, sure, afterwards.
447
00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:50,633
I'd really like that.
448
00:15:50,733 --> 00:15:53,967
So you're just going into
your flat now then, Scott?
449
00:15:54,067 --> 00:15:54,900
Right now!
450
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,833
Yes, but he will be back.
451
00:15:56,933 --> 00:15:57,800
BONNIE: Oh my God!
452
00:15:57,900 --> 00:15:58,767
Oh my God!
453
00:15:58,867 --> 00:16:00,100
Please, Scott, help me!
454
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,267
Help her, help her!
455
00:16:01,367 --> 00:16:02,200
You OK?
456
00:16:05,433 --> 00:16:06,833
One's bigger than the other.
457
00:16:06,933 --> 00:16:08,900
We need a second opinion.
458
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:12,667
Look, this phone call's really
urgent, but I won't be long.
459
00:16:12,767 --> 00:16:13,900
You can't go.
460
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:15,400
Why not?
461
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:19,533
Because we were going to
play a game of spin the bottle.
462
00:16:19,633 --> 00:16:20,633
The three of you?
463
00:16:20,733 --> 00:16:23,633
Girls night in standard.
464
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:25,633
[funky music]
465
00:16:37,100 --> 00:16:38,567
[groans]
466
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:41,567
Go.
467
00:16:44,633 --> 00:16:46,100
[banging]
468
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:49,800
Oh.
469
00:16:49,900 --> 00:16:51,133
Laura, don't do that.
470
00:16:51,233 --> 00:16:52,200
You your girl.
471
00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:54,800
You can't just give all this up.
472
00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:56,600
Are you playing spin the bottle?
473
00:16:56,700 --> 00:16:57,567
No, actually.
474
00:16:57,667 --> 00:16:58,867
We're playing truth or dare.
475
00:16:58,967 --> 00:16:59,967
Wanna play?
476
00:17:00,067 --> 00:17:01,500
I'll do anything
for you, babe.
477
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,233
All right, truth.
478
00:17:03,333 --> 00:17:04,633
Did you steal all the money?
479
00:17:04,733 --> 00:17:05,867
Some of it, yeah, but--
480
00:17:05,967 --> 00:17:07,167
[slaps]
481
00:17:07,267 --> 00:17:08,767
Right, I really need
to make that phone call.
482
00:17:08,867 --> 00:17:10,933
Don't you fucking move.
483
00:17:11,033 --> 00:17:12,667
Gary, dare.
484
00:17:12,767 --> 00:17:14,067
I'll do anything.
485
00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:15,600
Dance for us.
486
00:17:15,700 --> 00:17:16,800
You know I can't do that.
487
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:17,767
I can't dance.
488
00:17:17,867 --> 00:17:18,800
I'd rather eat my own shit.
489
00:17:18,900 --> 00:17:20,533
Oh please make him do that.
490
00:17:20,633 --> 00:17:21,467
Do it.
491
00:17:24,933 --> 00:17:25,833
[music playing]
492
00:17:25,933 --> 00:17:27,067
Let's go.
493
00:17:27,167 --> 00:17:29,633
Come on everybody,
it's time to get down.
494
00:17:29,733 --> 00:17:33,167
We are the party people, crazy
people who don't hang around.
495
00:17:33,267 --> 00:17:37,133
So put your hands up in
the air, and ask for more.
496
00:17:37,233 --> 00:17:40,500
It's all about the music,
so get up on the floor.
497
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:44,067
Now baby tonight, we're
going to lose ourselves.
498
00:17:44,167 --> 00:17:49,133
Tonight, we're going to
feel so good all night.
499
00:17:49,233 --> 00:17:50,533
OK, Gary, you can stop now.
500
00:17:50,633 --> 00:17:53,667
We're going to lose control
until the morning light.
501
00:17:53,767 --> 00:17:54,567
The morning light.
502
00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:55,567
Gary, stop.
503
00:17:55,667 --> 00:17:57,200
This is how much
I love you, Laura.
504
00:17:57,300 --> 00:18:01,333
We're gonna lose
ourselves tonight.
505
00:18:01,433 --> 00:18:02,233
Gary!
506
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:09,067
That is the most romantic thing
you've ever done, you wanker.
507
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:13,333
We need booze.
508
00:18:18,167 --> 00:18:19,267
[door unlocking]
509
00:18:19,367 --> 00:18:20,200
Oh.
510
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,667
Must be something
to drink here.
511
00:18:29,767 --> 00:18:30,933
Hold on.
512
00:18:31,033 --> 00:18:32,733
Is anything going on
between you and Meg?
513
00:18:32,833 --> 00:18:33,900
Me and Meg?
514
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,333
No.
515
00:18:35,433 --> 00:18:37,033
Absolutely not.
516
00:18:37,133 --> 00:18:41,467
Except sex, occasionally,
two nights ago.
517
00:18:41,567 --> 00:18:43,467
Flat mate with
benefits sort of thing?
518
00:18:43,567 --> 00:18:44,500
Could say that, yeah.
519
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:45,733
Here, take this back.
520
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:46,833
I've got to make
that phone call.
521
00:18:46,933 --> 00:18:49,467
I'll be right over.
522
00:18:49,567 --> 00:18:51,033
[light switch clicks]
523
00:19:02,533 --> 00:19:04,000
[plop]
524
00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:08,400
[plop]
525
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:12,400
[grunts]
526
00:19:12,500 --> 00:19:13,800
[plop]
527
00:19:19,467 --> 00:19:20,767
[farts]
528
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:38,700
[locks door]
529
00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:40,700
[keys jangling]
530
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:53,967
Which one?
531
00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:56,833
I think it might be
the left, but if I may--
532
00:19:56,933 --> 00:19:57,800
[phone buzzing]
533
00:19:57,900 --> 00:19:59,367
By all means.
534
00:20:02,233 --> 00:20:03,500
Bonnie, I put
the sick in a bag.
535
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:05,633
He did a poo in front of
me, and now I'm locked in.
536
00:20:05,733 --> 00:20:07,767
Come and get me before
I start self-harming.
537
00:20:07,867 --> 00:20:09,100
Meg, it's Mark.
538
00:20:13,433 --> 00:20:17,633
How did you get locked in there?
539
00:20:17,733 --> 00:20:19,600
[gasps]
540
00:20:22,100 --> 00:20:24,167
[make-out noises]
541
00:20:31,033 --> 00:20:32,467
Why the fucking cupboard?
542
00:20:32,567 --> 00:20:35,000
I'm claustra-fucking-phobic,
dick.
543
00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:36,200
[make-out noises continue]
544
00:20:36,300 --> 00:20:39,667
Oh, God [inaudible]
Counsel me, Scott.
545
00:20:39,767 --> 00:20:40,767
How sad are you?
546
00:20:40,867 --> 00:20:42,600
Tell me how fucking sad you are.
547
00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:43,900
Oh, God.
548
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,233
I'm so sad, so sad, so
sad, sad, sad, sad, sad.
549
00:20:45,333 --> 00:20:47,700
Oh God, I've got a
aching-- aching hole in me.
550
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:48,867
Just fill it.
551
00:20:48,967 --> 00:20:49,833
Fill it!
552
00:20:49,933 --> 00:20:50,800
[shrieks]
553
00:20:50,900 --> 00:20:51,700
Fill it!
554
00:20:57,867 --> 00:20:59,067
Oh, Scott!
555
00:20:59,167 --> 00:21:03,067
That better be a coat
hanger in your trousers.
556
00:21:03,167 --> 00:21:04,000
Oh my God.
557
00:21:04,100 --> 00:21:06,167
[shushes]
558
00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:08,233
I can't breathe.
559
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:11,633
This is--
560
00:21:11,733 --> 00:21:13,567
[hyperventilating]
561
00:21:13,667 --> 00:21:15,533
Oh no, I'm dying.
562
00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:23,200
What the fuck?
563
00:21:23,300 --> 00:21:23,967
Meg!
564
00:21:24,067 --> 00:21:25,067
Oh shit.
565
00:21:25,167 --> 00:21:27,167
Can you explain
yourself, please?
566
00:21:27,267 --> 00:21:30,200
Oh sure, sure, I can
explain myself, Bonnie.
567
00:21:30,300 --> 00:21:31,600
Mm.
568
00:21:31,700 --> 00:21:33,733
Shall I explain how I got stuck
in the flat after cleaning up
569
00:21:33,833 --> 00:21:36,933
all the sick from the carpet
after you dared me to break in,
570
00:21:37,033 --> 00:21:39,500
yeah, and then I had to
watch Scott do a poo.
571
00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:42,100
Shall I explain how I got
stuck in the fucking closet
572
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:45,233
while I watched my best
friend shag the bloke I told
573
00:21:45,333 --> 00:21:48,833
countless times that I fancied.
574
00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:50,933
Yes, I fancy Scott.
575
00:21:51,033 --> 00:21:51,833
I fancy you.
576
00:21:51,933 --> 00:21:53,433
Did you know that?
577
00:21:53,533 --> 00:21:55,200
I thought you were
going out with Mark.
578
00:21:55,300 --> 00:21:57,800
I didn't actually say that.
579
00:21:57,900 --> 00:22:00,133
Mark!
580
00:22:00,233 --> 00:22:01,867
This is just great.
581
00:22:01,967 --> 00:22:04,200
Thanks very fucking much, guys.
582
00:22:04,300 --> 00:22:05,133
Mark.
583
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:11,400
Perfect.
584
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,033
[giggles]
585
00:22:20,133 --> 00:22:22,500
Well, can you at least wait
for me to fucking leave.
586
00:22:34,767 --> 00:22:36,500
[slams door]
Night then.
587
00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:52,167
Sorry, Meg, I'm not
really in the mood.
588
00:22:52,267 --> 00:22:53,967
You have an erection.
589
00:22:54,067 --> 00:22:57,567
Yeah, but I'd rather
just save that for myself.
590
00:23:03,667 --> 00:23:10,067
[sex noises in the distance]
591
00:23:10,167 --> 00:23:11,400
Shut up!
[music playing]
592
00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:12,133
I'm ready.
593
00:23:12,233 --> 00:23:13,967
I'm restless.
594
00:23:14,067 --> 00:23:17,900
I'm trying my hardest
to get this picture
595
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:19,233
perfect point of view.
596
00:23:22,667 --> 00:23:28,067
But I'm tired of waiting for
something, for someone to take
597
00:23:28,167 --> 00:23:31,233
me anywhere I want to go.
598
00:23:34,167 --> 00:23:37,467
Because something's calling me--
599
00:23:37,567 --> 00:23:39,100
Bwack.
38805
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