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1
00:00:01,133 --> 00:00:04,202
Cheers is filmedbefore a live studio audience.
2
00:00:04,236 --> 00:00:05,453
All right,
here you go, Cliffie.
3
00:00:05,487 --> 00:00:06,655
How about
getting your mom
4
00:00:06,689 --> 00:00:08,623
a pair of these soothing,
gel-filled insoles,
5
00:00:08,658 --> 00:00:10,358
and odor eliminators.
6
00:00:10,392 --> 00:00:13,461
It's only her birthday,
it's not Christmas.
7
00:00:13,495 --> 00:00:15,830
How about one of these
Lucite snack trays
8
00:00:15,865 --> 00:00:17,832
that plays the theme
from Cats?
9
00:00:17,867 --> 00:00:20,302
Yeah, Valentine's Day, 1963.
10
00:00:20,336 --> 00:00:23,038
Back then
it played "Exodus."
11
00:00:23,072 --> 00:00:24,705
Hummingbird feeder?
12
00:00:24,740 --> 00:00:27,525
Come on, you guys
are just being silly
now, right?
13
00:00:27,559 --> 00:00:28,827
Well, then, Cliff,
I'm afraid
14
00:00:28,861 --> 00:00:32,330
you're going to spend
a little more than $1.99
for your mom's gift.
15
00:00:32,364 --> 00:00:33,798
Yeah, you're right, Normie.
16
00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:35,300
You only turn 70 once.
17
00:00:36,602 --> 00:00:38,236
Speaking as a mom,
18
00:00:38,271 --> 00:00:39,671
you know, when
my kids give me gifts,
19
00:00:39,705 --> 00:00:41,572
the ones that always
mean the most
to me are the ones
20
00:00:41,607 --> 00:00:42,941
they make themselves.
21
00:00:42,975 --> 00:00:46,611
For instance, look
at this little
key chain here.
22
00:00:46,646 --> 00:00:49,680
Anthony made this for me the
first year he went away to camp.
23
00:00:49,715 --> 00:00:52,117
I carried it with me
ever since.
24
00:00:52,151 --> 00:00:54,835
I think it might be
the most precious
thing I own.
25
00:00:54,870 --> 00:00:56,404
Well, I'll give you
three bucks for it.
26
00:00:56,439 --> 00:00:58,473
Done.
27
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:04,128
( piano plays )
28
00:01:04,163 --> 00:01:06,731
� Making your way
in the world today �
29
00:01:06,765 --> 00:01:09,801
� Takes everything you've got
30
00:01:09,835 --> 00:01:12,637
� Taking a break
from all your worries �
31
00:01:12,671 --> 00:01:15,740
� Sure would help a lot
32
00:01:15,774 --> 00:01:21,178
� Wouldn't you like
to get away? �
33
00:01:21,213 --> 00:01:23,865
� Sometimes you want to go
34
00:01:23,899 --> 00:01:28,753
� Where everybody
knows your name �
35
00:01:28,787 --> 00:01:33,992
� And they're always glad
you came �
36
00:01:34,026 --> 00:01:35,994
� You want to be
where you can see �
37
00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:38,997
� Our troubles
are all the same �
38
00:01:39,031 --> 00:01:43,768
� You want to be where everybody
knows your name �
39
00:01:43,802 --> 00:01:46,905
� You want to go
where people know �
40
00:01:46,939 --> 00:01:49,040
� People are all the same
41
00:01:49,074 --> 00:01:53,611
� You want to go where
everybody knows your name. �
42
00:02:07,276 --> 00:02:11,495
Sam, you're working a big party
the 26th at Mr. Gaines'.
43
00:02:11,530 --> 00:02:12,697
Another big party...
44
00:02:12,732 --> 00:02:15,100
How come you always
get roped into running
these things?
45
00:02:15,134 --> 00:02:16,167
I'm not running this.
46
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,501
I'm just delivering
the message.
47
00:02:17,536 --> 00:02:19,254
Yes, I will be attending
the party,
48
00:02:19,288 --> 00:02:20,522
but as an honored guest.
49
00:02:20,556 --> 00:02:23,224
An honored guest who happens to
show up a couple of hours early
50
00:02:23,259 --> 00:02:25,326
and leave a couple hours late.
51
00:02:25,361 --> 00:02:27,295
And I will do as
any other good guest will:
52
00:02:27,329 --> 00:02:31,032
help clean up,
and maybe park a few cars.
53
00:02:31,066 --> 00:02:33,134
So what's the shindig
for this time?
54
00:02:33,169 --> 00:02:36,103
Oh, it's one of those
welcome-back-from-your-fabulous
55
00:02:36,138 --> 00:02:37,539
all-expense-paid-trip-
to-Europe,
56
00:02:37,573 --> 00:02:38,606
you-sniveling-snot-brat
57
00:02:38,641 --> 00:02:42,009
of-a-vice-president's-
daughter's tennis brunch.
58
00:02:43,345 --> 00:02:45,213
Gee, I've never
been to one of those.
59
00:02:46,165 --> 00:02:47,215
Good.
60
00:02:47,249 --> 00:02:48,883
You're tending bar.
61
00:02:48,917 --> 00:02:49,917
There's the address.
62
00:02:49,952 --> 00:02:51,185
I'll see you at 10:00,
Sunday morning.
63
00:02:51,220 --> 00:02:54,222
She played right into my hands.
64
00:02:58,194 --> 00:02:59,861
REBECCA:
If I do say so myself,
65
00:02:59,895 --> 00:03:01,462
I do throw
a lovely party.
66
00:03:02,364 --> 00:03:03,815
Oh, Mr. Gaines,
67
00:03:03,849 --> 00:03:05,316
I don't believe
I've been introduced
68
00:03:05,350 --> 00:03:07,184
to the guest of honor,
your lovely daughter.
69
00:03:07,219 --> 00:03:08,886
Oh, Kelly would love
to meet you.
70
00:03:09,888 --> 00:03:13,725
Oh, she's busy.
71
00:03:13,759 --> 00:03:15,360
Jack Daniels, neat.
72
00:03:15,394 --> 00:03:17,144
SAM:
Coming right up, sir.
73
00:03:17,179 --> 00:03:18,546
Say, aren't you Sam Malone?
74
00:03:18,581 --> 00:03:20,214
Didn't you used
to be a pitcher?
75
00:03:20,249 --> 00:03:21,549
Yep, that's me.
76
00:03:21,584 --> 00:03:23,084
Now you're doing this?
77
00:03:23,118 --> 00:03:24,335
Well,
78
00:03:24,369 --> 00:03:25,720
nothing wrong with tending bar.
79
00:03:25,754 --> 00:03:26,921
It's good, honest work.
80
00:03:28,374 --> 00:03:30,374
Uh, here's a little
something for you.
81
00:03:37,917 --> 00:03:39,818
Those rich snobs, man.
82
00:03:39,852 --> 00:03:42,954
They think they can look
down their noses at you,
83
00:03:42,988 --> 00:03:44,655
and then make everything better
by slipping you a measly...
84
00:03:44,690 --> 00:03:47,025
50 bucks?
85
00:03:49,945 --> 00:03:51,012
Two white wines,
please.
86
00:03:51,047 --> 00:03:52,613
Yes, sir.
Coming right up here.
87
00:03:55,384 --> 00:03:57,519
You know, Woody, I tell ya,
88
00:03:57,553 --> 00:03:58,786
it's a long way
89
00:03:58,820 --> 00:04:00,688
from pitching
in the major leagues
90
00:04:00,722 --> 00:04:02,223
to slinging drinks.
91
00:04:03,509 --> 00:04:04,426
What am I gonna do,
you know?
92
00:04:04,460 --> 00:04:06,978
I mean, life's dealt me
this lousy hand.
93
00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:08,762
I guess I'm just
gonna have
94
00:04:08,797 --> 00:04:10,081
to play it out, huh?
95
00:04:10,115 --> 00:04:11,949
I'm sorry, sir.
96
00:04:11,984 --> 00:04:13,384
Uh, there
are your drinks.
97
00:04:13,418 --> 00:04:14,502
Thank you.
98
00:04:14,536 --> 00:04:16,687
Oh, bless you.
99
00:04:21,393 --> 00:04:24,328
I'm definitely
on to something here.
100
00:04:27,399 --> 00:04:28,515
Excuse me,
101
00:04:28,550 --> 00:04:29,734
bartender.
102
00:04:29,768 --> 00:04:30,985
A little more champagne.
103
00:04:31,019 --> 00:04:32,370
Sure.
104
00:04:32,404 --> 00:04:34,839
Maybe I'll get
a tip, too, Sam.
105
00:04:34,874 --> 00:04:38,209
Listen, this whining for
dollars routine is mine.
106
00:04:40,012 --> 00:04:43,314
Anyway, I'll be summering
in D.C., God help me.
107
00:04:43,348 --> 00:04:45,149
Dad's favoring me
with the option of going up
108
00:04:45,183 --> 00:04:47,552
on the Hill to page
or being a clerk.
109
00:04:47,586 --> 00:04:49,287
So what do you think?
110
00:04:49,321 --> 00:04:50,705
Oh, uh, excuse me
for interrupting,
111
00:04:50,739 --> 00:04:52,039
but I'd go
with the clerk job.
112
00:04:52,073 --> 00:04:56,177
I had a blast the summer I
clerked at the Piggly Wiggly.
113
00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,480
Uh...
114
00:04:59,515 --> 00:05:00,581
I'm sure you did,
115
00:05:00,616 --> 00:05:03,951
but I was talking about
being a legal clerk.
116
00:05:03,985 --> 00:05:06,087
Oh, this was all
in the up and up.
117
00:05:09,191 --> 00:05:11,226
Are you always this obtuse?
118
00:05:11,260 --> 00:05:12,576
The cummerbund
119
00:05:12,611 --> 00:05:15,079
makes my waist
look thick.
120
00:05:18,450 --> 00:05:19,483
Yeah...
121
00:05:19,517 --> 00:05:20,484
yeah, thick.
122
00:05:20,519 --> 00:05:22,370
That's the word
I was searching for.
123
00:05:22,404 --> 00:05:23,788
Write it on your hand.
124
00:05:23,822 --> 00:05:25,690
You'll never forget it.
125
00:05:27,326 --> 00:05:29,194
He's very funny.
126
00:05:31,363 --> 00:05:32,547
Well, here's to you,
Malone.
127
00:05:32,581 --> 00:05:34,816
And, uh, I wish you
lots of luck
128
00:05:34,850 --> 00:05:36,584
on that triple bypass.
129
00:05:38,654 --> 00:05:39,821
Thank you.
130
00:05:39,855 --> 00:05:41,356
Bless your heart.
131
00:05:44,326 --> 00:05:46,561
You having a
heart problem, Sam?
132
00:05:46,595 --> 00:05:50,030
Yeah, it feels like there's
something pressing on it.
133
00:05:50,065 --> 00:05:52,933
Maybe like...
all this cash.
134
00:05:52,968 --> 00:05:56,971
( speaking quietly )
135
00:05:57,005 --> 00:05:59,840
Excuse me, uh, bartender.
136
00:05:59,875 --> 00:06:01,108
Can I give you
a little tip?
137
00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:04,378
Looking good, Sam.
138
00:06:04,412 --> 00:06:05,612
Sure.
139
00:06:05,647 --> 00:06:07,398
For the rest of the afternoon,
140
00:06:07,432 --> 00:06:09,533
just keep your mouth shut.
141
00:06:09,568 --> 00:06:11,152
Excuse me?
142
00:06:11,186 --> 00:06:15,557
You're here to work,
not to chitchat with the guests.
143
00:06:15,591 --> 00:06:18,092
You think just
because you're rich
144
00:06:18,126 --> 00:06:19,827
you can boss people
around?
145
00:06:19,861 --> 00:06:21,762
We've got guys like you
back in Hanover.
146
00:06:21,797 --> 00:06:23,331
You know what
we call them?
147
00:06:23,365 --> 00:06:23,881
What?
148
00:06:23,915 --> 00:06:25,966
"Sir."
149
00:06:28,286 --> 00:06:31,055
But after we say it,
we roll our eyes.
150
00:06:37,112 --> 00:06:39,714
You know, kid, you're really
starting to annoy me.
151
00:06:39,748 --> 00:06:41,348
I think I'm going
to teach you some manners.
152
00:06:41,383 --> 00:06:42,583
Step outside.
153
00:06:42,618 --> 00:06:44,068
Uh, uh, I'm sorry, all right?
154
00:06:44,103 --> 00:06:45,269
I was out of line.
155
00:06:45,304 --> 00:06:46,737
I don't want to fight.
156
00:06:46,771 --> 00:06:48,756
Oh, you're not as
stupid as you look.
157
00:06:48,790 --> 00:06:51,558
Now I want to fight.
158
00:06:51,593 --> 00:06:53,127
Whoa, whoa, what's going
on here, man?
159
00:06:53,161 --> 00:06:56,497
This guy just said
I wasn't as stupid
as I look, Sam.
160
00:06:56,531 --> 00:06:59,333
Whoa, whoa, come here.
161
00:06:59,368 --> 00:07:00,801
Listen, whoa, whoa, stop.
162
00:07:00,835 --> 00:07:02,669
I mean it. Really, listen,
before you go out there,
163
00:07:02,704 --> 00:07:04,138
let me just say
a couple of things here.
164
00:07:04,172 --> 00:07:06,173
Now I've been a bartender
for quite a few years
165
00:07:06,207 --> 00:07:08,142
and I've broken up a lot
of fights in my day.
166
00:07:08,176 --> 00:07:10,010
And I'll tell you
no matter who's involved,
167
00:07:10,044 --> 00:07:12,446
whether they're rich guys
or poor guys,
168
00:07:12,481 --> 00:07:15,082
tall guys or short guys,
169
00:07:15,116 --> 00:07:17,451
fat guys, skinny guys,
170
00:07:17,486 --> 00:07:19,320
guys with speech impediments...
171
00:07:19,354 --> 00:07:21,288
What's your point?
172
00:07:21,323 --> 00:07:24,559
Well, the point is, that usually
by this point in the story,
173
00:07:24,593 --> 00:07:26,827
the guys would forget
what they're angry about
174
00:07:26,862 --> 00:07:28,529
and they'd kind of wander away.
175
00:07:28,564 --> 00:07:32,150
Yeah, well, I, I, uh...
176
00:07:32,184 --> 00:07:34,451
I guess this isn't
the right time or place.
177
00:07:34,486 --> 00:07:36,370
Yeah, you're right.
178
00:07:36,405 --> 00:07:37,821
All right, there you go.
179
00:07:37,856 --> 00:07:39,023
Very good, very good.
180
00:07:39,057 --> 00:07:41,525
Now why don't you just go
back to the bar here, Woody.
181
00:07:41,559 --> 00:07:44,362
Will you tell me
the rest of the
story later, Sam?
182
00:07:55,573 --> 00:07:57,008
Well, maybe we'll, uh...
183
00:07:57,042 --> 00:08:00,210
we'll meet again,
when your daddy isn't around.
184
00:08:00,245 --> 00:08:02,913
I don't need him
to protect me.
185
00:08:02,948 --> 00:08:06,084
I'll meet you
anywhere, anytime.
186
00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:09,353
You can find me
at Cheers.
187
00:08:11,706 --> 00:08:13,107
I'll see you there tomorrow.
188
00:08:13,141 --> 00:08:14,775
I'll be there with bells on.
189
00:08:16,044 --> 00:08:18,613
That's just an expression.
190
00:08:25,987 --> 00:08:27,187
Excuse me, please.
191
00:08:27,222 --> 00:08:28,222
Excuse me.
192
00:08:28,256 --> 00:08:29,140
Yeah?
193
00:08:29,174 --> 00:08:30,691
Sam, I heard
what you've been doing.
194
00:08:30,726 --> 00:08:33,494
Going around
giving everyone
a hard luck story,
195
00:08:33,529 --> 00:08:35,062
so they give you
big tips.
196
00:08:35,096 --> 00:08:36,997
I find that completely
unprofessional,
197
00:08:37,032 --> 00:08:38,333
and I will not
condone it.
198
00:08:38,367 --> 00:08:40,568
I'm going to dock you
a day's pay.
199
00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:43,571
Did you hear that?
200
00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:50,477
Woody,
201
00:08:50,512 --> 00:08:51,162
cognac
202
00:08:51,196 --> 00:08:53,013
for all my friends.
203
00:08:53,047 --> 00:08:54,615
We're celebrating
this year's recipient
204
00:08:54,649 --> 00:08:55,850
of the Fisk Foundation grant.
205
00:08:55,884 --> 00:08:57,150
NORM:
All right.
206
00:08:57,185 --> 00:08:58,302
I knew you could do it, buddy.
207
00:08:58,337 --> 00:08:59,470
What the hell is it?
208
00:09:00,389 --> 00:09:02,139
It's a very prestigious
and lucrative fellowship
209
00:09:02,173 --> 00:09:04,475
that will enable me, finally,
after all these years,
210
00:09:04,509 --> 00:09:05,576
to complete my treatise.
211
00:09:05,611 --> 00:09:08,245
"Man's need to work,
the never-ending drive.
212
00:09:08,279 --> 00:09:11,716
To build, create
and achieve."
213
00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:12,867
Yeah, must feel
pretty good.
214
00:09:12,901 --> 00:09:13,868
Oh, you bet.
215
00:09:13,902 --> 00:09:16,670
If I can cop one more fat grant,
it's loaf city.
216
00:09:21,744 --> 00:09:22,710
Ah.
217
00:09:22,745 --> 00:09:25,379
The only thing missing now
is a fine cigar.
218
00:09:25,413 --> 00:09:27,081
Well, allow me.
219
00:09:27,116 --> 00:09:28,850
Carla, three of your
finest Tampas, please.
220
00:09:28,884 --> 00:09:31,452
You got it, gentlemen.
221
00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:33,588
Look at these beauties.
222
00:09:33,622 --> 00:09:35,089
That'll be 45 cents.
223
00:09:37,292 --> 00:09:42,446
Carla, we asked for a cigar,
not this flammable bratwurst.
224
00:09:44,332 --> 00:09:46,384
Come on, Fras, these
are pretty tasty.
225
00:09:46,418 --> 00:09:47,968
Yeah, and they
outlast the others
226
00:09:48,002 --> 00:09:50,571
by what, a good,
eight or nine hours.
227
00:09:50,606 --> 00:09:53,207
Cliffie, make a smoke
ring go around my head
the way you do.
228
00:09:53,241 --> 00:09:54,742
Uh-huh.
229
00:10:00,082 --> 00:10:02,616
Okay, Boyd, I'm here.
230
00:10:02,651 --> 00:10:05,052
Yeah, so am I.
231
00:10:05,086 --> 00:10:08,055
Course, I'm always here,
so it's no big deal.
232
00:10:08,089 --> 00:10:12,192
You know, I wouldn't feel right
beating you senseless,
233
00:10:12,227 --> 00:10:14,161
unless I warn you in advance,
234
00:10:14,195 --> 00:10:16,731
I was on the boxing team
at Princeton.
235
00:10:16,765 --> 00:10:19,066
Yeah? Well, while you're
beating me senseless,
236
00:10:19,100 --> 00:10:20,434
keep this in mind:
237
00:10:20,469 --> 00:10:24,772
I was first alternate
on the Hanover High
Boxing Squad.
238
00:10:24,806 --> 00:10:27,007
What is that supposed
to mean?
239
00:10:27,041 --> 00:10:29,076
It means if anybody
got sick or hurt,
I'd be the one...
240
00:10:29,110 --> 00:10:30,978
No!
241
00:10:32,281 --> 00:10:35,949
I mean, is that supposed
to make you a tough guy?
242
00:10:35,984 --> 00:10:37,618
Tough enough.
243
00:10:37,653 --> 00:10:40,388
Yeah, well, proof
is in the pudding.
244
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:41,939
All right, that does it.
245
00:10:41,973 --> 00:10:44,058
Nobody says that to me.
246
00:10:45,743 --> 00:10:47,712
Who wants to see a rich boy
get his butt whupped?
247
00:10:47,746 --> 00:10:49,379
( crowd clamoring )
248
00:10:49,414 --> 00:10:51,382
CROWD ( chanting ):
Woody! Woody! Woody!
249
00:10:51,416 --> 00:10:52,483
Wait a minute, wait a minute!
250
00:10:52,517 --> 00:10:53,984
I can't leave here.
251
00:10:54,018 --> 00:10:56,170
Look, if you're gonna fight,
go fight in the back.
252
00:10:56,204 --> 00:10:58,606
But remember, you gotta
bus your own blood.
253
00:10:58,640 --> 00:10:59,623
Let's go.
254
00:10:59,657 --> 00:11:04,361
( chanting ):
Woody, Woody, Woody,
255
00:11:04,396 --> 00:11:06,530
Woody, Woody, Woody, Woody...
256
00:11:11,019 --> 00:11:13,370
( blow lands, body thuds )
257
00:11:13,404 --> 00:11:17,608
Rich guy! Rich guy!
Rich guy! Rich guy!
258
00:11:26,335 --> 00:11:29,119
Ugh, did I get struck
by lightning?
259
00:11:29,153 --> 00:11:31,054
No, Woody.
260
00:11:31,089 --> 00:11:34,441
Oh, right, I guess that only
happens once in your life.
261
00:11:37,246 --> 00:11:39,447
He's okay.
262
00:11:39,481 --> 00:11:42,016
Gee, I hate for you guys
to see me like this,
263
00:11:42,050 --> 00:11:43,784
all dopey and muddle-headed.
264
00:11:46,755 --> 00:11:48,989
Yeah, we barely recognize you.
265
00:11:50,559 --> 00:11:54,295
We Boyds don't appreciate having
our faces caved in.
266
00:11:54,329 --> 00:11:55,229
SAM:
Yeah?
267
00:11:55,263 --> 00:11:57,198
I'm gonna get that guy.
268
00:11:57,232 --> 00:11:58,432
Calm down, Woody.
269
00:11:58,467 --> 00:12:00,901
Isn't it enough that you left
little bits of face
270
00:12:00,935 --> 00:12:02,069
in his pinkie ring?
271
00:12:02,104 --> 00:12:04,538
( Cliff laughing )
272
00:12:04,572 --> 00:12:07,708
And your nose really messed up
his shoeshine when you fell.
273
00:12:11,013 --> 00:12:12,046
I'm gonna get that guy.
274
00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:13,580
I'm gonna get him good.
275
00:12:13,615 --> 00:12:14,615
Oh, come on, Woody.
276
00:12:14,649 --> 00:12:16,283
What do you...
how can you get him, man?
277
00:12:16,318 --> 00:12:18,986
He's rich, he's smart,
he's in good shape, he's tough;
278
00:12:19,021 --> 00:12:21,222
hangs out with a better class
of people...
279
00:12:21,256 --> 00:12:22,289
Hey!
Hey!
280
00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:24,925
You know what
I'm talking about, guys.
281
00:12:24,959 --> 00:12:27,361
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
282
00:12:27,396 --> 00:12:28,695
Hey!
Hey!
283
00:12:33,135 --> 00:12:34,568
How can I get that guy?
284
00:12:34,602 --> 00:12:37,104
He must have some weak spot.
285
00:12:37,139 --> 00:12:39,507
Oh, hi.
I hope I'm not too late.
286
00:12:39,541 --> 00:12:41,242
I heard my boyfriend
was coming here
287
00:12:41,276 --> 00:12:42,443
to fight
that nice bartender.
288
00:12:42,477 --> 00:12:43,444
Fight?!
289
00:12:43,478 --> 00:12:44,811
I've had sneezes
290
00:12:44,846 --> 00:12:46,113
that lasted longer.
291
00:12:47,749 --> 00:12:51,285
Oh, I am so sorry
Nash did this.
292
00:12:51,319 --> 00:12:53,421
He has such
a ridiculous temper.
293
00:12:53,455 --> 00:12:58,926
If there's anything I can do,
please, don't hesitate to ask.
294
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,295
Are your hands just
naturally this soft,
295
00:13:01,329 --> 00:13:03,581
or you use
a special lotion?
296
00:13:03,615 --> 00:13:06,500
Lotion, but you can't
buy it in the States.
297
00:13:06,535 --> 00:13:08,201
Smells good, too.
298
00:13:08,236 --> 00:13:09,804
No, it's fragrance free.
299
00:13:09,838 --> 00:13:11,338
You smell my hair.
300
00:13:11,372 --> 00:13:14,842
I rinse it in an essence
of Belgian wild flowers.
301
00:13:14,876 --> 00:13:18,045
They make a boy's version?
302
00:13:21,716 --> 00:13:24,485
I'll have my personal shopper
check and send you a case.
303
00:13:24,519 --> 00:13:27,387
I feel just terrible
about what Nash did.
304
00:13:27,422 --> 00:13:29,790
It'd be a shame if you got
a scar on that cute face.
305
00:13:31,109 --> 00:13:32,275
I'll be okay.
306
00:13:32,310 --> 00:13:34,344
Okay. Bye.
307
00:13:34,379 --> 00:13:35,045
Bye.
308
00:13:37,031 --> 00:13:39,883
Now, how could I get
that Nash guy?
309
00:13:39,918 --> 00:13:40,918
Woody?
310
00:13:40,952 --> 00:13:43,054
Woody, I think it's
kind of obvious,
311
00:13:43,088 --> 00:13:44,522
if you know what I mean.
312
00:13:46,324 --> 00:13:48,125
Beat up his girlfriend?
313
00:13:51,996 --> 00:13:55,665
I don't think you could.
314
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:56,851
Whoa.
315
00:13:56,885 --> 00:13:58,486
Come on.
316
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:00,754
Now think with
me here. Think.
317
00:14:00,789 --> 00:14:02,155
Now, have you met
anybody recently,
318
00:14:02,190 --> 00:14:03,724
kind of cute, you know?
319
00:14:03,758 --> 00:14:07,227
Somebody who smells good
and has hair down to here?
320
00:14:07,261 --> 00:14:09,830
I'm interested in what
you're saying, Sam,
321
00:14:09,865 --> 00:14:11,465
but I just had a thought.
322
00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:14,902
If I went out with that girl,
I could make Nash real jealous.
323
00:14:14,936 --> 00:14:18,105
( all chanting ):
Woody! Woody! Woody...
324
00:14:18,140 --> 00:14:20,991
I'm back!
Woody! Woody! Woody...
325
00:14:21,025 --> 00:14:24,395
This has been a fabulous day.
326
00:14:24,429 --> 00:14:27,298
As I walked through the halls
of headquarters,
327
00:14:27,332 --> 00:14:29,032
I received nothing but kudos
328
00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:31,201
for my fantastic party
yesterday.
329
00:14:31,236 --> 00:14:33,437
Mr. Gaines said
I displayed leadership,
330
00:14:33,472 --> 00:14:35,873
imagination and class.
331
00:14:35,907 --> 00:14:38,476
I am it.
332
00:14:38,510 --> 00:14:40,811
That's great, Miss Howe.
333
00:14:40,845 --> 00:14:44,014
Listen, do you think it'd be
okay if I took an hour off?
334
00:14:44,048 --> 00:14:45,549
Of course, Woody,
take two.
335
00:14:45,584 --> 00:14:46,850
You deserve it.
336
00:14:46,885 --> 00:14:48,085
Oh, great.
337
00:14:48,119 --> 00:14:50,154
I'm going to go ask your boss
for permission
338
00:14:50,188 --> 00:14:51,289
to date his daughter, okay?
339
00:14:51,323 --> 00:14:52,089
Okay.
340
00:14:52,857 --> 00:14:55,442
No!
341
00:15:04,252 --> 00:15:05,469
And so, Mr. Gaines,
342
00:15:05,503 --> 00:15:07,537
please allow me to stress again,
343
00:15:07,572 --> 00:15:09,506
in the strongest way possible,
344
00:15:09,540 --> 00:15:11,408
that my being here
in no way reflects
345
00:15:11,442 --> 00:15:13,043
upon Miss Rebecca Howe
346
00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:17,014
or her chance for advancement
in your corporation.
347
00:15:17,048 --> 00:15:19,917
I'll take that under advisement.
348
00:15:19,952 --> 00:15:21,819
Now, if you'll please get on
with your business?
349
00:15:21,853 --> 00:15:23,370
Yes, sir.
350
00:15:23,405 --> 00:15:25,305
My business is
that I'd like permission
351
00:15:25,339 --> 00:15:28,275
to date your daughter Kelly.
352
00:15:28,309 --> 00:15:29,576
I think you'll find
353
00:15:29,611 --> 00:15:31,929
that I'm generous, hardworking,
354
00:15:31,963 --> 00:15:34,531
friendly, cheerful, and honest.
355
00:15:35,283 --> 00:15:37,851
Oh, yeah, and I'm funny, too.
356
00:15:37,886 --> 00:15:40,621
Well presented, young man.
357
00:15:40,655 --> 00:15:43,123
And a charming, old-fashioned
gesture, besides.
358
00:15:43,157 --> 00:15:44,357
Ready to hit
the links, Walter?
359
00:15:44,392 --> 00:15:46,226
In a minute, Nash.
360
00:15:46,260 --> 00:15:47,394
Anyway, as you can see,
361
00:15:47,428 --> 00:15:49,563
your visit has been
in vain, Mr. Boyd.
362
00:15:49,598 --> 00:15:51,966
My daughter Kelly has been
dating young Nash here
363
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:52,833
for some years now.
364
00:15:52,867 --> 00:15:53,934
Well, Boyd,
365
00:15:53,969 --> 00:15:55,335
how's that chin healing?
366
00:15:55,369 --> 00:15:58,155
Never mind my chin,
how's your ring?
367
00:16:03,361 --> 00:16:05,863
Nash, it seems Mr. Boyd here
has his eye on Kelly.
368
00:16:05,897 --> 00:16:08,432
Oh, what a coincidence.
369
00:16:08,466 --> 00:16:11,468
Only yesterday,
he had his eye on my Topsiders.
370
00:16:11,502 --> 00:16:13,103
Come on, son.
371
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:14,371
We're on the tee
in ten minutes.
372
00:16:14,406 --> 00:16:16,073
That sounds good,
373
00:16:16,107 --> 00:16:18,275
but I have to warn you,
I've never played before.
374
00:16:21,779 --> 00:16:24,314
He's talking to me, Gomer.
375
00:16:26,017 --> 00:16:27,350
You'll show yourself out?
376
00:16:32,657 --> 00:16:34,392
Well, you better
get going, Boyd.
377
00:16:34,426 --> 00:16:36,527
You're going to be late
for that bus.
378
00:16:36,561 --> 00:16:38,629
A lot you know.
379
00:16:38,663 --> 00:16:42,400
It doesn't come around for
another 15 minutes.
380
00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:44,768
MR. GAINES:
Nash?
381
00:16:44,802 --> 00:16:47,104
Let's do it!
382
00:16:47,138 --> 00:16:49,973
I'll see you
later, Kelly.
383
00:16:50,007 --> 00:16:52,842
Got to go let your dad
beat me at golf again.
384
00:16:56,347 --> 00:17:00,484
Well, I better be going, too.
385
00:17:03,405 --> 00:17:04,605
Wait a minute.
386
00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:07,057
I heard your dad's answer
387
00:17:07,091 --> 00:17:08,191
and I heard Nash's answer,
388
00:17:08,226 --> 00:17:10,527
but I still haven't heard
your answer yet.
389
00:17:10,562 --> 00:17:13,264
Oh, gosh, Woody, I couldn't.
390
00:17:13,298 --> 00:17:15,633
I understand.
391
00:17:19,237 --> 00:17:21,204
Wait a minute.
392
00:17:23,575 --> 00:17:25,059
Why not?
393
00:17:25,093 --> 00:17:26,994
I'm not Nash's property,
394
00:17:27,028 --> 00:17:30,197
and I just hate it when he
always assumes that I am.
395
00:17:30,232 --> 00:17:33,133
Well, beans, this'll show him!
396
00:17:33,168 --> 00:17:36,270
Aw, that's great.
That is terrific.
397
00:17:36,304 --> 00:17:37,571
All right.
398
00:17:37,605 --> 00:17:39,740
I'll pick you up tomorrow
at 8:00, okay?
399
00:17:39,774 --> 00:17:42,793
Now, I promise you you're going
to have the best time possible.
400
00:17:42,827 --> 00:17:44,528
You may think from looking
at me,
401
00:17:44,562 --> 00:17:47,063
that I'm an unsophisticated guy
who doesn't know his way around,
402
00:17:47,098 --> 00:17:49,349
but you're going
to find out I do, okay?
403
00:17:49,383 --> 00:17:50,700
I'll see ya.
404
00:17:55,656 --> 00:17:57,557
Woody?
405
00:17:57,592 --> 00:17:59,477
Yes?
406
00:17:59,511 --> 00:18:02,879
Do you know you're in a closet?
407
00:18:04,549 --> 00:18:06,951
Yeah, but I thought it might be
more sophisticated
408
00:18:06,985 --> 00:18:08,518
just to lay low
and then sneak out
409
00:18:08,553 --> 00:18:10,421
after everyone went to bed.
410
00:18:14,475 --> 00:18:16,643
Good night.
411
00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:18,645
Good night.
412
00:18:25,086 --> 00:18:26,871
Sam, has Woody come back
from his date yet?
413
00:18:26,905 --> 00:18:28,071
Uh-uh.
414
00:18:28,106 --> 00:18:30,875
I changed his schedule around so
he can all of his evenings off
415
00:18:30,909 --> 00:18:33,644
so he can continue to date
that lovely young woman.
416
00:18:33,678 --> 00:18:35,613
Wait a minute, now you
want him to date?
417
00:18:35,647 --> 00:18:37,214
I mean, what happened
to the Attack
418
00:18:37,248 --> 00:18:39,750
of the Screaming Boss Lady
from Hell?
419
00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:42,853
Now I will admit
that I didn't want him
420
00:18:42,887 --> 00:18:45,088
to ask her out originally,
but let's face it--
421
00:18:45,123 --> 00:18:46,323
he's on a date with her.
422
00:18:46,358 --> 00:18:48,459
And the more they date,
the more of a chance
423
00:18:48,493 --> 00:18:50,461
he has to become
the boss's son-in-law.
424
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:53,330
And boss's sons-in-law become
VP's
425
00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:55,466
and in the corporate world,
it always helps
426
00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:57,100
to have a VP
in your corner.
427
00:18:57,252 --> 00:18:58,735
That's disgusting.
428
00:18:59,770 --> 00:19:01,872
Sam, I don't make up the rules.
429
00:19:01,906 --> 00:19:03,340
I just follow them.
430
00:19:06,244 --> 00:19:09,713
Thanks again for a wonderful
evening, Woody.
431
00:19:09,747 --> 00:19:11,815
You introduced me
to a whole new world.
432
00:19:11,849 --> 00:19:13,583
Yeah, it's hard to
believe a girl like you
433
00:19:13,618 --> 00:19:16,653
has never been to
a monster truck and
tractor pull before.
434
00:19:20,091 --> 00:19:22,393
Oh, Woody!
On the first date!
435
00:19:22,427 --> 00:19:24,361
How you going
to top that, buddy?
436
00:19:24,396 --> 00:19:26,012
Well, there's no need
to top it.
437
00:19:26,047 --> 00:19:27,714
It's a one-shot deal.
438
00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:28,798
Wh-What do you mean?
What...?
439
00:19:28,833 --> 00:19:30,800
I mean, the only reason
she went out with me
440
00:19:30,835 --> 00:19:32,536
was to make a point
with her boyfriend.
441
00:19:32,570 --> 00:19:34,321
Wait, wait, wait,
how do you know that?
442
00:19:34,355 --> 00:19:35,322
'Cause she told me.
443
00:19:35,356 --> 00:19:36,556
I mean, it only seems fair.
444
00:19:36,591 --> 00:19:38,258
The only reason
I went out with her
445
00:19:38,292 --> 00:19:39,693
was to get revenge
at her boyfriend.
446
00:19:39,728 --> 00:19:41,394
At least that's what I told her.
447
00:19:41,429 --> 00:19:42,830
NORM:
Woody,
448
00:19:42,864 --> 00:19:44,497
that is beautiful.
449
00:19:44,532 --> 00:19:45,565
That's the kind of honesty
450
00:19:45,599 --> 00:19:47,600
that's going to keep you out
of marriage.
451
00:19:51,589 --> 00:19:53,223
Kelly.
452
00:19:54,642 --> 00:19:56,943
Your dad said
I might find you here.
453
00:19:56,978 --> 00:19:58,728
Nash, I know what
you're going to say,
454
00:19:58,763 --> 00:20:00,264
and I don't want
to hear it.
455
00:20:00,298 --> 00:20:03,283
I'm tired of being
treated like chattel.
456
00:20:03,318 --> 00:20:06,186
Excuse me, I think that's
pronounced cattle.
457
00:20:10,625 --> 00:20:14,895
You know, when I heard
what you were up to,
I got really mad.
458
00:20:14,929 --> 00:20:17,597
Then I, well, I realized,
you couldn't possibly
459
00:20:17,632 --> 00:20:19,766
be doing this
for your own enjoyment,
460
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:22,836
so you must be doing it
to prove a point to me.
461
00:20:22,870 --> 00:20:25,239
And I have to say,
point well taken.
462
00:20:25,273 --> 00:20:28,175
This has been a humbling
experience for me.
463
00:20:28,209 --> 00:20:29,376
Nothing personal.
464
00:20:29,411 --> 00:20:33,813
That's okay, I didn't
understand it.
465
00:20:33,848 --> 00:20:38,301
Anyway, from now on,
new Nash.
466
00:20:38,336 --> 00:20:41,271
Just hope you'll give me
another chance.
467
00:20:41,305 --> 00:20:44,574
Well, okay.
468
00:20:44,609 --> 00:20:45,876
Great.
469
00:20:45,910 --> 00:20:46,910
Hey, let's go.
470
00:20:46,945 --> 00:20:49,446
Maybe we can catch
a late supper at Guiseppi's.
471
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,314
I don't know.
472
00:20:51,349 --> 00:20:53,050
Are we finished with our date,
Woody?
473
00:20:53,084 --> 00:20:57,387
Yeah, okay, I guess it's
over... if you want.
474
00:20:59,290 --> 00:21:03,694
Well, thanks again
for a fun evening.
475
00:21:03,728 --> 00:21:04,894
Kelly?
476
00:21:04,929 --> 00:21:06,563
What?
477
00:21:06,597 --> 00:21:08,899
Nothing.
478
00:21:08,933 --> 00:21:11,768
Do you have something you want
to say to me, Woody?
479
00:21:11,802 --> 00:21:13,704
No.
480
00:21:13,738 --> 00:21:15,939
I had a great time.
481
00:21:15,973 --> 00:21:17,140
It was nice meeting you.
482
00:21:17,174 --> 00:21:20,377
I was really happy
to get to know you.
483
00:21:20,411 --> 00:21:23,614
I guess I did have
something to say to you.
484
00:21:23,648 --> 00:21:28,118
So, I... guess
we should be leaving.
485
00:21:28,153 --> 00:21:30,804
Yeah, I guess I should be
getting back to work.
486
00:21:30,838 --> 00:21:32,272
Well, have fun working.
487
00:21:32,307 --> 00:21:33,940
Yeah, have fun leaving.
488
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:40,447
Woody, come on, man.
489
00:21:40,481 --> 00:21:41,981
Go get her.
490
00:21:42,016 --> 00:21:42,949
I can't, Sam.
491
00:21:42,983 --> 00:21:44,451
What could I possibly
say to her?
492
00:21:44,485 --> 00:21:45,819
Just say, "I like you.
493
00:21:45,853 --> 00:21:47,387
Will you go out
with me again?"
494
00:21:47,422 --> 00:21:48,988
Oh, right, just like that.
495
00:21:49,023 --> 00:21:50,791
And she's going to dump
her rich boyfriend
496
00:21:50,825 --> 00:21:52,692
who she's been seeing
for all these years,
497
00:21:52,727 --> 00:21:53,960
for poor, old, nobody Woody.
498
00:21:53,994 --> 00:21:55,361
I'm afraid the real world
499
00:21:55,396 --> 00:21:57,564
doesn't work
like that, Sam; trust me.
500
00:21:57,598 --> 00:21:59,132
No, Woody, come on.
501
00:21:59,166 --> 00:22:01,234
Hey, listen, just do me
a favor: Go get her.
502
00:22:01,268 --> 00:22:03,603
Now, if it doesn't work out,
I'll buy you dinner.
503
00:22:03,638 --> 00:22:05,138
If it does, you owe me.
504
00:22:05,173 --> 00:22:06,239
Just go out there.
505
00:22:06,274 --> 00:22:08,808
Say, "I like you, will you
go out with me again?"
506
00:22:08,843 --> 00:22:10,743
Come on, before it's
too late, go get her.
507
00:22:10,778 --> 00:22:12,212
I'll give it a try, Sam.
508
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:17,668
Excuse me.
509
00:22:20,237 --> 00:22:21,872
Kelly, uh...
510
00:22:25,059 --> 00:22:27,461
I like you.
511
00:22:27,495 --> 00:22:29,496
Will you go out with me again?
512
00:22:29,531 --> 00:22:31,681
Sure.
513
00:22:31,715 --> 00:22:32,916
Oh, great,
514
00:22:32,950 --> 00:22:34,084
great.
515
00:22:34,118 --> 00:22:35,753
Well, we can't do it tonight.
516
00:22:35,787 --> 00:22:37,187
I've got to take Sam out.
517
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:41,241
Oh, no, no.
518
00:22:41,276 --> 00:22:44,044
It's okay, we can
go out now.
519
00:22:44,078 --> 00:22:46,446
Uh, yeah, I have
a standing reservation
520
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,381
at Pizza by the Yard.
521
00:22:48,416 --> 00:22:49,649
Oh, wait a minute.
522
00:22:49,684 --> 00:22:51,051
What about Nash?
523
00:22:51,085 --> 00:22:53,003
Well, I was getting in the car
with him
524
00:22:53,037 --> 00:22:54,304
when I realized...
525
00:22:54,338 --> 00:22:56,807
Woody, I have
a lot more fun with you.
526
00:22:56,841 --> 00:23:00,343
Ah, yeah,
I know what you mean.
527
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:02,713
I didn't have much fun
with Nash, either.
528
00:23:04,248 --> 00:23:05,582
Hey, Miss Howe?
529
00:23:06,751 --> 00:23:09,002
Can I leave now?
Take Kelly out?
530
00:23:09,036 --> 00:23:11,205
I promise I'll work
a double next week.
531
00:23:11,239 --> 00:23:12,272
Oh, don't worry about it.
532
00:23:12,307 --> 00:23:13,707
Go, go ahead.
Have a good time.
533
00:23:13,741 --> 00:23:15,875
And if you want to stay out
real late and get married,
534
00:23:15,910 --> 00:23:17,477
then come in anytime tomorrow.
535
00:23:17,512 --> 00:23:19,362
You're the greatest, Miss Howe.
536
00:23:19,396 --> 00:23:20,564
WOODY:
Okay, let's hurry.
537
00:23:20,598 --> 00:23:21,998
If we get there by 6:00,
538
00:23:22,032 --> 00:23:24,234
we can sit
at the Pac-Man table.
539
00:23:24,268 --> 00:23:25,802
What's a Pac-Man?
540
00:23:25,836 --> 00:23:28,371
Oh, Kelly, I have
so much to teach you.
49002
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