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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,500 --> 00:00:06,100 Cheers is filmed before a live studio audience. 2 00:00:06,100 --> 00:00:08,700 ( Carla humming ) 3 00:00:09,700 --> 00:00:11,900 Boy, look at her. 4 00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:12,900 What a glow she has. 5 00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:14,300 You know, strange as it sounds, 6 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:15,500 there are actually times 7 00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:16,700 when I resent being a man. 8 00:00:16,700 --> 00:00:18,000 Ah, that's all right, Fras. 9 00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:19,600 Sometimes we resent you being one. 10 00:00:19,700 --> 00:00:21,300 ( Sam laughs ) 11 00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:24,600 I was referring to Carla's condition. 12 00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:25,800 You see, she's able 13 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,100 to do something we men never shall-- 14 00:00:28,100 --> 00:00:29,900 experience the miracle of creating a new life. 15 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,400 SAM: You know, I'll have to admit. 16 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:33,000 I've often wondered what it would like 17 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:35,400 to have another human being moving around inside you. 18 00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:37,500 Must be spooky, but real neato. 19 00:00:37,500 --> 00:00:38,900 Yeah. 20 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:41,100 There's probably nothing so awesome 21 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:42,700 in the entire universe. 22 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:44,100 Yes, gentlemen, I'm afraid 23 00:00:44,100 --> 00:00:45,300 that we've been relegated 24 00:00:45,400 --> 00:00:46,800 to the position of observer. 25 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:49,300 Passive, sitting on the sidelines. 26 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:52,000 Doomed by nature to a life of envy. 27 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,300 God, feels like there's a dump truck 28 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,400 parked on my bladder. 29 00:00:57,600 --> 00:00:59,100 Well, then again, 30 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:01,800 nature is wise in her way. 31 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:07,000 ( piano plays ) 32 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,600 � Making your way in the world today � 33 00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:12,600 � Takes everything you've got 34 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,400 � Taking a break from all your worries � 35 00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:18,500 � Sure would help a lot 36 00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:24,100 � Wouldn't you like to get away? � 37 00:01:24,100 --> 00:01:26,900 � Sometimes you want to go 38 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:31,600 � Where everybody knows your name � 39 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:36,800 � And they're always glad you came � 40 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,800 � You want to be where you can see � 41 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:41,800 � Our troubles are all the same � 42 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:46,600 � You want to be where everybody knows your name � 43 00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:49,700 � You want to go where people know � 44 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:51,800 � People are all the same 45 00:01:51,900 --> 00:01:56,400 � You want to go where everybody knows your name. � 46 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,800 What makes me think this belongs to you? 47 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,000 ( gasps ) 48 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,400 My jasmine scented oriental massage oil. 49 00:02:21,500 --> 00:02:24,700 Oh, God. 50 00:02:24,800 --> 00:02:27,100 God, I thought I'd lost this. 51 00:02:27,100 --> 00:02:28,800 I found it wedged 52 00:02:28,900 --> 00:02:31,100 underneath the couch cushions in my office. 53 00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:33,800 Ah. I don't think I want to know how it got there. 54 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:35,700 I'm kind of curious. 55 00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:38,700 Tell you what. 56 00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:40,900 Why don't you, uh, put that back where you found it, 57 00:02:40,900 --> 00:02:43,600 and that way, we'll know where it is when we need it. 58 00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:45,900 When hell freezes over. 59 00:02:45,900 --> 00:02:47,900 Well, that's perfect, 'cause this stuff heats up 60 00:02:47,900 --> 00:02:49,800 when you rub it in. 61 00:02:51,700 --> 00:02:54,000 Now, what... what's wrong with her, you know? 62 00:02:54,100 --> 00:02:57,300 Maybe one of the chains in her underwear is twisted. 63 00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:01,900 Afternoon, everybody. 64 00:03:01,900 --> 00:03:03,100 ALL: Norm! 65 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:04,600 Hey. 66 00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:05,800 What's going on, Mr. Peterson? 67 00:03:05,900 --> 00:03:08,600 Let's talk about what's going in Mr. Peterson. 68 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:10,100 Beer, Woody. 69 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:11,700 How's the job-hunting going? 70 00:03:11,700 --> 00:03:13,100 Oh, lots better, Sam. 71 00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:15,600 Today I actually got turned down for an executive position. 72 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:20,500 It's a good way to lose that. 73 00:03:21,900 --> 00:03:23,400 I'm sorry, Mr. Peterson. 74 00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:24,900 You've been cut off. 75 00:03:28,300 --> 00:03:32,300 Oh. Okay, where's the camera? 76 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:33,400 This is no joke. 77 00:03:33,500 --> 00:03:34,700 According to my books, 78 00:03:34,700 --> 00:03:36,800 you are way over your credit limit. 79 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:37,600 SAM: Well, what's the big deal? 80 00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:40,000 What's he over-- ten, 20 bucks? 81 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,500 837. 82 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,300 But in other words, under $900, huh? 83 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,400 You can't cut off one of our regulars. 84 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:49,900 The poor guy is unemployed. 85 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,800 FRASIER: Look, Miss Howe, uh, 86 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:53,700 Norm here is in a very delicate spot. 87 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,700 His self-confidence has been shattered. 88 00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:58,300 Uh, what he needs from us now is help and support. 89 00:03:58,300 --> 00:04:01,100 Isn't there some other way to resolve this problem? 90 00:04:01,100 --> 00:04:02,500 Well, you could pay his bar bill. 91 00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:04,900 Norm, the woman will not listen to reason. 92 00:04:06,100 --> 00:04:07,900 Maybe he could work it off, huh? 93 00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:08,900 ( laughter ) 94 00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:10,100 No, I'm serious. Whoa, 95 00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:11,600 whoa, whoa, hey. 96 00:04:11,700 --> 00:04:12,800 Listen, maybe there's 97 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:14,300 some accounting he could do for the bar. 98 00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:16,400 Our corporation's books are handled 99 00:04:16,400 --> 00:04:18,400 by Franklin, Sussman and Gurwitz. 100 00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:19,800 Ooh, they're very good, Sam. 101 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:21,600 They canned me a couple years ago. 102 00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:24,500 Please. 103 00:04:24,500 --> 00:04:25,800 ( sighs ) 104 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:27,900 Are you good at anything? 105 00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:29,000 Yeah, 106 00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:30,300 but you cut him off. 107 00:04:30,300 --> 00:04:31,400 SAM: No, no. 108 00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:33,200 Come on, don't you have any other skills? 109 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:34,300 I can barbecue. 110 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,700 Oh, hey, hey. Yeah. 111 00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:37,900 NORM: All right, well, I, 112 00:04:37,900 --> 00:04:39,900 uh... I did a little house painting in college. 113 00:04:39,900 --> 00:04:41,200 You know, to make ends meet. 114 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,300 ( laughs ): Norm, Norm, Norm. 115 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,100 Norm, I think they're talking about a job 116 00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:45,600 where you get, uh, paid with money, 117 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:49,000 not with little grain pellets dropped out of a chute. 118 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:51,400 Cliff, you, uh, you got something against painters? 119 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:52,700 ( laughs ): No, no, no. I... 120 00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:54,300 I'm in favor of hiring the blithering. 121 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:56,200 ( laughs ) 122 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:58,500 Do... do you need any painting done around here? 123 00:04:59,700 --> 00:05:01,400 I guess you could repaint the office. 124 00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:03,100 Are you willing? 125 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:04,600 It's been an awfully long time. 126 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:05,700 CLIFF: Oh, yeah, yeah. 127 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:06,900 It's gonna take you 128 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,500 at least, what, seven or eight seconds 129 00:05:08,500 --> 00:05:09,500 to relearn that skill. 130 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:10,500 ( laughs ) 131 00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:12,000 'Cause, you know, Cliff, I'm beginning 132 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,500 to pick up a little thread here. Uh... 133 00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:14,600 Ah. 134 00:05:14,700 --> 00:05:15,800 Would you mind explaining 135 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,900 this little obsession you have about painters? 136 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,700 CLIFF: Well, all right. Uh, well, 137 00:05:19,700 --> 00:05:20,400 it's manual labor. 138 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:21,700 I mean, it's beneath you, Norm. 139 00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:23,700 Well, if you take a job like this, we're gonna be 140 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,500 on entirely different social strata. 141 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:27,800 We'll have nothing to talk about, all right? 142 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,900 Semigloss or enamel? 143 00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:38,600 Hey, Woody, would you close up for me tonight? 144 00:05:38,700 --> 00:05:40,100 I got to get home. 145 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:41,500 No problem, Carla. 146 00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:42,900 By the way, 147 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,200 I really am envious of you 148 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:46,100 having a nice big family to go home to. 149 00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:47,900 Oh, yeah, it's great, all right. 150 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:50,200 I got 11 people 151 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,500 living under a roof that was meant for only six. 152 00:05:52,500 --> 00:05:56,000 Gino's dog just had puppies on my side of the bed. 153 00:05:56,100 --> 00:05:58,600 My daughter-in-law is driving me nuts, and somehow, 154 00:05:58,700 --> 00:06:01,200 my mother-in-law got a hold of our address. 155 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:05,200 Puppies. You lucky duck. 156 00:06:09,100 --> 00:06:14,300 ( humming ) 157 00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:15,900 You seem to be enjoying yourself. 158 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,900 Oh, sorry. Uh... 159 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:19,000 No, that's all right. 160 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:24,700 Oh, uh, you got a phone call here, uh... 161 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:26,300 Eva Ake? 162 00:06:27,500 --> 00:06:28,400 I could swear it was a man. 163 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:29,600 Oh, well, there's paint here. 164 00:06:29,700 --> 00:06:31,200 Evan Drake. Uh... 165 00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:32,700 That's my boss. Yeah. 166 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:33,600 What did he say? 167 00:06:33,700 --> 00:06:35,000 Well, he said, he, uh... 168 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,900 he wants you to tear up my bar bill. 169 00:06:37,900 --> 00:06:40,100 I... Well... 170 00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:41,700 I didn't think I'd get away with that. 171 00:06:41,700 --> 00:06:43,700 Uh, but, no, he said he's on his way over here. 172 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:45,300 Sometime, like, uh... 173 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:46,900 around nowish. 174 00:06:46,900 --> 00:06:48,300 Now?! 175 00:06:48,300 --> 00:06:50,200 God. 176 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:05,700 Shall I, uh, comb my hair, too, or will I be leaving? 177 00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:09,400 This is just a business meeting. 178 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:13,900 ( phone rings ) 179 00:07:13,900 --> 00:07:15,100 Rebecca Howe. 180 00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:16,400 Oh, hello, Mr. Drake. 181 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:17,700 I thought you were-- 182 00:07:17,800 --> 00:07:19,200 Norm. 183 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:20,900 No, no, no, I know 184 00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:22,600 you're not Norm. You're Evan. 185 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:23,900 What I meant 186 00:07:23,900 --> 00:07:25,500 to say was-- Get out of here. 187 00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:26,700 No, no, no, not you. 188 00:07:26,700 --> 00:07:28,500 You stay right where you are. 189 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:29,700 No, I swear... 190 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:30,700 Get out! 191 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:33,300 Oh. Hello? 192 00:07:33,300 --> 00:07:36,100 Well, that was fast, Mr. P. 193 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,600 Yeah, she got a phone call from Mr. Drake. 194 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,800 Hey, Mr. Peterson, I really feel bad 195 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,300 about you being cut off. 196 00:07:42,300 --> 00:07:43,900 Yeah. 197 00:07:43,900 --> 00:07:46,200 You know, I remember the good old days 198 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,300 when you used to come in here and 199 00:07:48,300 --> 00:07:49,900 say something funny. 200 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:51,600 I'd pour you a beer. 201 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:53,200 You'd drink it, I'd pour you another one, 202 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:54,400 you'd drink that, too. 203 00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,600 Yeah. 204 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,500 Yeah, I remember, Woody. 205 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,300 So look at that-- hardly even touched. 206 00:08:00,300 --> 00:08:01,600 Yeah. 207 00:08:01,700 --> 00:08:04,100 I'll tell you, I don't normally drink beer, but, uh, 208 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:07,100 I just cleaned the taps, and I wanted to make sure 209 00:08:07,100 --> 00:08:09,800 that everything was all right, so I had one. 210 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:12,500 It was like a mountain stream, 211 00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:14,600 only colder, fresher. 212 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:16,600 You know, sometimes 213 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:18,500 there's nothing like a nice cold beer 214 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:19,700 to really hit the spot. 215 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,000 Yeah, I think I read that somewhere, Woody. 216 00:08:35,700 --> 00:08:37,300 You know, I-I really like this color. 217 00:08:37,300 --> 00:08:38,500 I think it's gonna really 218 00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:40,100 spruce up the office quite a bit. 219 00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:41,900 ( sobbing ) 220 00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:43,600 Again, it's just an opinion. Uh... 221 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:45,600 ( sobbing ) 222 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,000 Is there something wrong? 223 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:51,000 ( tearful mumbling ) 224 00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:57,200 Right. Well, yes, I understand, of course. 225 00:08:57,200 --> 00:08:58,700 Here, here, have a seat, have a seat. 226 00:08:58,700 --> 00:09:00,000 Just relax. 227 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:01,700 Oh, God. 228 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,700 Here. 229 00:09:03,700 --> 00:09:06,400 Some authority figure. 230 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:08,000 I'm sorry. 231 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,700 It's probably just job stress. 232 00:09:10,700 --> 00:09:12,100 Oh, you shouldn't be having job stress. 233 00:09:12,100 --> 00:09:13,500 You're doing a great job here. 234 00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:14,800 Oh, tell that to Mr. Drake. 235 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:17,200 He said I should consider the last fiscal report 236 00:09:17,300 --> 00:09:19,600 a personal embarrassment. 237 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:20,800 ( sobbing ) 238 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:22,500 Norm, I need your help. 239 00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:23,500 Uh, you just started. 240 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:24,800 You're-you're gonna do fine. 241 00:09:24,900 --> 00:09:26,800 Things are gonna turn around, I swear. 242 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:27,900 Uh... 243 00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,000 No, you idiot. 244 00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:30,700 My hair's stuck to the wall. 245 00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:34,100 ( sniffles ) 246 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,000 Oh, great. 247 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,100 No, no, it's really... 248 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:44,400 It's not, uh... not that bad. 249 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,300 I paid big bucks to have Vera's hair frosted. 250 00:09:46,300 --> 00:09:48,000 Didn't turn out half as good. 251 00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:52,000 Well, maybe I better take off. 252 00:09:52,100 --> 00:09:53,700 When people are upset, they... 253 00:09:53,700 --> 00:09:54,900 they like to be alone. 254 00:09:54,900 --> 00:09:56,800 Nonsense. I'm fine. 255 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:57,800 Talking about me. 256 00:09:57,900 --> 00:09:59,500 I'm feeling a little queasy. 257 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,300 Oh, please stay. 258 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:03,700 I mean, 259 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:06,200 this office is a real inconvenience like this. 260 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,000 All right. 261 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,300 ( sniffles ) 262 00:10:16,400 --> 00:10:17,700 Would you, uh, 263 00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,900 would you like to talk about what just happened? 264 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:20,400 No. 265 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:21,800 Phew. 266 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:30,900 ( sighs ) 267 00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:32,400 You really do seem to be 268 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:34,100 enjoying this job. 269 00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:35,900 Yeah. Yeah, I actually do, you know? 270 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,400 I think painting is just 271 00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:39,600 so vastly different from accounting. 272 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:42,500 This is real, you know? 273 00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,900 This I have some control over. 274 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,400 I mean, when I look back, 275 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:48,900 I finish a job, I can say, 276 00:10:48,900 --> 00:10:51,700 "You know, I did that." 277 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,800 Door must have moved. 278 00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,400 You know, 279 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:03,800 I think that this color is the exact same color 280 00:11:03,900 --> 00:11:06,300 as Mary Lou Sebold's car coat. 281 00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:06,900 Who? 282 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,300 This girl I had an insane crush on 283 00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:09,500 in the third grade. 284 00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:11,400 Except she had no idea that I was alive. 285 00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:12,900 I used to leave 286 00:11:12,900 --> 00:11:14,000 little notes for her. 287 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,600 "I love you." 288 00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:18,000 And one day, I finally got up the nerve 289 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:19,300 to sign one, N.P. 290 00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:21,600 The next week, she was going steady 291 00:11:21,700 --> 00:11:24,300 with my best friend, Nicky Petropolis. 292 00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:27,200 What'd you do? 293 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,100 The only thing I could do, really. 294 00:11:29,100 --> 00:11:30,400 I went over to Nicky, 295 00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,500 and I calmly explained the situation. 296 00:11:32,500 --> 00:11:33,900 Then I sat on him. 297 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,500 ( laughs ) 298 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,500 ( continues laughing ) 299 00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:40,100 Oh, God. 300 00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:42,100 I think that's the first time I've really laughed 301 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:43,300 since I took over here. 302 00:11:43,300 --> 00:11:45,200 Oh, it is, trust me. 303 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:51,700 Why'd you tell me that story? 304 00:11:51,700 --> 00:11:53,100 Well, I don't know. 305 00:11:53,100 --> 00:11:54,500 It's kind of late. 306 00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:55,800 We're alone. 307 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,900 I'm a man, you're a woman. 308 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,500 Maybe it's the paint talking. 309 00:12:04,700 --> 00:12:05,800 Norm? 310 00:12:05,900 --> 00:12:07,100 Yeah. 311 00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:09,400 Do you find me cold? 312 00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:10,700 You? 313 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:12,100 Cold? No. 314 00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:13,400 No, I wouldn't say cold. 315 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:14,600 Coolish. 316 00:12:15,700 --> 00:12:17,000 In the brisk area, 317 00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:18,300 but, uh... 318 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,000 Why? Who, uh... who says you're cold? 319 00:12:20,100 --> 00:12:21,400 Everyone. 320 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,600 Oh. Well... 321 00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:24,300 I don't think you're cold. 322 00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:25,500 Really? 323 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:27,000 Yeah. I always meant to tell you that, 324 00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:29,100 but I didn't feel as though I could approach you. 325 00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:37,300 Thank you, Norm. 326 00:12:37,300 --> 00:12:38,700 Oh. 327 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,600 Thank you. 328 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,300 Uh, well, I'd better get out of here. 329 00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,100 Um, would you mind locking up for me? 330 00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:45,600 No, no, I don't mind at all. 331 00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:47,400 Listen, would you please not, uh, 332 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,500 mention that I like painting to the guys? 333 00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:52,200 Cliff already thinks I'm a weenie. 334 00:12:52,300 --> 00:12:53,800 Well, from what I've seen, 335 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:55,000 he's an authority. 336 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,400 Yeah. 337 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:57,900 Well... 338 00:12:57,900 --> 00:13:00,100 And, really, thanks for letting me paint an office 339 00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:01,600 that clearly didn't need it. 340 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:02,600 No problem. 341 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:04,700 You're a nice man, Norm. 342 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,700 You're kind of nice yourself. 343 00:13:06,700 --> 00:13:08,800 I guess we like each other. 344 00:13:08,900 --> 00:13:10,100 Guess so. 345 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,200 Great. 346 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:13,900 This will just be our little secret. 347 00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:14,500 Oh, yeah. 348 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:24,300 I am a little worried about 349 00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:26,400 the direction this bar is taking. 350 00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:27,400 How so? 351 00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:29,400 Well, it just doesn't seem right 352 00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:31,600 when the stakes for a game of pool 353 00:13:31,700 --> 00:13:33,700 is a round of wine spritzers. 354 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,500 Not even the pool room is safe 355 00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,400 from the encroaching hordes of yuppiedom. 356 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:42,200 How long will it be until we're all suffocated 357 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,500 beneath an avalanche of alligator shirts, 358 00:13:44,500 --> 00:13:46,600 German cars, and racquetball club memberships? 359 00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:47,900 Oh, oh, by the way, Sam, 360 00:13:47,900 --> 00:13:50,700 uh, may I have another Perrier with lime? 361 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,400 Have a cup of coffee or something, Sam? 362 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,200 Make it a beer. On the house. 363 00:14:03,700 --> 00:14:05,400 I say we check the office 364 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,900 for pods from outer space. 365 00:14:09,700 --> 00:14:11,700 I wonder what that's all about, huh? 366 00:14:11,700 --> 00:14:13,300 Look, did it ever occur to any of you 367 00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:14,600 that she just might be a nice woman? 368 00:14:14,700 --> 00:14:15,800 Oh, yeah, right. 369 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,500 And so am I. 370 00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:22,200 ( sighs ) 371 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:23,900 So, how come you guys are so chummy, huh? 372 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,500 Sorry, Sam. Can't talk about it. 373 00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:26,900 Kind of private. 374 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,000 Oh, give me a break. 375 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,700 Guys are supposed to talk about girls 376 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:31,100 behind their backs. 377 00:14:31,100 --> 00:14:32,900 ( swallows hard ) Didn't I tell you 378 00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:34,500 everything about me and Diane? 379 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:38,300 Well, now's your chance to thank me. 380 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,900 I'm not really at liberty to go into details. 381 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,300 Suffice it to say, 382 00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:45,200 Miss Howe had a little personal crisis 383 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:46,500 last night, okay? 384 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,500 Few tears were shed. 385 00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:50,200 Real tears? 386 00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:52,900 You sure she didn't just pull a hair out of her nose? 387 00:14:54,700 --> 00:14:56,400 No, Carla. 388 00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:57,300 She got a little sad, 389 00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:58,900 and I happened to be there to comfort her. 390 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,700 I think it really just takes 391 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,700 a little warmth and compassion, 392 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:04,700 and she warms right up to you. 393 00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:07,100 Compassion, huh? 394 00:15:07,100 --> 00:15:08,600 Mr. Malone. Mm-hmm. 395 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:11,200 Do you realize we're running low on seltzer? 396 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:12,300 I'm so sorry. 397 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,100 Ho-How can these things happen? 398 00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:17,700 Is there anything I can do? 399 00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:19,200 Yes, let me know next time. 400 00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:20,400 Well, of course I will. 401 00:15:20,500 --> 00:15:22,200 I just hope that's enough. 402 00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:25,100 Are you feeling all right? 403 00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:27,200 Yes, thank you very much. 404 00:15:27,300 --> 00:15:30,000 That's very sweet of you to ask. 405 00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,600 Norm, I gave you my address, didn't I? 406 00:15:31,700 --> 00:15:33,000 Yep. See you tomorrow. See you. 407 00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:34,500 Whoa, what was that all about? 408 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,200 Just a little bit of painting at her apartment. 409 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:37,300 Listen, uh, 410 00:15:37,300 --> 00:15:38,900 you know, I can really sympathize 411 00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:40,500 with your situation of painting. 412 00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:42,500 Uh, you know, if the fumes and everything bothers you, 413 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:44,200 you can always spend the night at my place. 414 00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:46,300 I don't think so. 415 00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:48,400 That's it. 416 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:49,900 I say she's a guy. 417 00:15:51,100 --> 00:15:53,100 Good night, Sammy. 418 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,200 Say, uh... Norm, wait a second here. 419 00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:57,500 You know... you know, I like to paint. 420 00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:59,700 Why don't I help you, man, you know. 421 00:15:59,700 --> 00:16:01,200 ( scoffs ) Come on. 422 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:02,600 No. I know you. 423 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,900 You just want to log a little sack time with her. 424 00:16:04,900 --> 00:16:06,900 Come on, no. The truth is, I just... 425 00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,000 I got to find out 426 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:10,300 if there's a real human being in there, man. 427 00:16:10,300 --> 00:16:12,300 I-I can't keep working for a cold fish. 428 00:16:12,300 --> 00:16:13,400 Please, come on. 429 00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:14,700 All right. 430 00:16:14,700 --> 00:16:17,100 But no funny stuff. 431 00:16:17,100 --> 00:16:18,100 No, I swear to God. 432 00:16:18,300 --> 00:16:19,700 I won't touch her. I won't touch her. 433 00:16:19,700 --> 00:16:21,200 I make no guarantees about you. 434 00:16:21,300 --> 00:16:23,900 You've been driving me crazy in this little white outfit. 435 00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:26,400 Yeah? You should see me in my caftan. 436 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:35,900 ( doorbell rings ) 437 00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:42,600 Oh, hi, Norm. Come on in. 438 00:16:42,700 --> 00:16:43,700 Thank you. 439 00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:45,400 I was just... Hi. 440 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,100 Oh, God. 441 00:16:49,100 --> 00:16:51,800 Now it knows where I live. 442 00:16:51,900 --> 00:16:53,700 Sorry, I, uh, needed a helper, 443 00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:55,500 and when I checked around, 444 00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:58,500 most of the fellas expected to be paid. 445 00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:00,700 And you're doing this for nothing? 446 00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:03,000 Well, it's an act of compassion. 447 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:05,200 I'm doing this out of the... 448 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,000 goodness of my heart. 449 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,200 Norm. Yeah. 450 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,300 I'd like all the wood here 451 00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,900 and the moldings done in high gloss. 452 00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:13,600 Great. 453 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:14,600 You have any questions, 454 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:16,000 if you need anything, I'll be in the back. 455 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:16,800 NORM: Okay. 456 00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:17,900 So that's where 457 00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:19,200 the old bedroom is, huh? 458 00:17:19,700 --> 00:17:20,800 Sammy? 459 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,500 What? I'm not doing anything. 460 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:23,600 You promised. 461 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:24,900 No, I'm fine. 462 00:17:24,900 --> 00:17:27,000 All right, I want to start 463 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:27,900 with, uh, sanding for you. 464 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,100 Here. All right. 465 00:17:29,100 --> 00:17:31,400 All right, uh, try this post right here. 466 00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:32,700 Yeah. 467 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,400 I'll do a little taping. 468 00:17:43,700 --> 00:17:45,300 Hey, come on. Hey, Sam. 469 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:47,200 What? Sam, uh... 470 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,900 you have to do it with the grain, okay? 471 00:17:48,900 --> 00:17:50,500 Oh. Sand with the grain. 472 00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:55,100 My arm hurts when I do it like that. 473 00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:57,900 Very sorry, Sam. 474 00:17:57,900 --> 00:18:00,400 That's the way it has to be done, all right? 475 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:02,600 I don't think I like sanding. 476 00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:07,600 Just try to tape one pane at a time, all right? 477 00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:10,700 I don't think I like taping, either. 478 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:13,900 Norm. 479 00:18:13,900 --> 00:18:15,400 Hmm? It's Carla on the phone. 480 00:18:15,500 --> 00:18:17,500 Your wife needs you at home right away. 481 00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,500 Something about two feet of water in the basement. 482 00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:20,200 ( groans ) 483 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:21,600 Oh, boy, that's serious. 484 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,400 That's, like, a foot more than usual. 485 00:18:24,900 --> 00:18:26,200 I'm sorry. 486 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:27,200 It's just a little delay. 487 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:28,800 I'll be right back. No problem. 488 00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:30,300 Sammy, can I, uh, trust you here alone? 489 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,400 Yeah. Swear to God I won't touch her. 490 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,500 Tragic, huh? Absolutely tragic. 491 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:43,000 I beg your pardon? 492 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,900 Oh, I just couldn't help 493 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,500 thinking about Norm's basement. 494 00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:48,700 Yes? 495 00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:51,700 Well, it's not just, you know, 496 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,400 the water filling up. 497 00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:56,000 You know, it's those photo albums, 498 00:18:56,100 --> 00:18:59,000 those old letters. 499 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:02,600 Cherished mementos, you know, ru-ruined for... 500 00:19:02,700 --> 00:19:04,400 ( weepy ): Oh, I'm sorry. 501 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:05,600 Ooh, boy. 502 00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:08,100 Oh, this is embarrassing. 503 00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:10,200 I-I'm sorry. I just, uh... 504 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,400 ( sniffles ): I can't help feeling this way 505 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:15,500 ever since my dog, Lucky, died. 506 00:19:17,100 --> 00:19:19,300 Something is going on here. 507 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,900 I'm not exactly sure what it is. 508 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:23,500 Could it be that 509 00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:26,100 you're jerking me around? 510 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,000 Okay, uh... 511 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:31,400 ( clears throat ) 512 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:32,700 I'm sorry. 513 00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:36,300 It's just that there's a rumor going around the bar 514 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,800 that you've got this soft side, 515 00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,100 and I just thought I'd like to see it for myself. 516 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:41,900 Maybe get to know you better. 517 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:44,600 I guess I ought to just... 518 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:45,800 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. 519 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:47,700 I want to get this straight. 520 00:19:47,700 --> 00:19:49,800 You came over here on your day off 521 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,400 to paint my living room 522 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:53,900 in hopes of getting to know me better? 523 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,900 Pretty silly, huh? 524 00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:58,200 What'd you want to know? 525 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:05,300 Well? 526 00:20:05,300 --> 00:20:07,000 Um, I'm thinking. 527 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,800 I-I didn't think I was gonna get this far. Uh... 528 00:20:12,900 --> 00:20:15,000 Well, all right, all right, 529 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,200 Um... where were you born? 530 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:18,400 San Diego. 531 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,100 San Diego. 532 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:21,400 California, huh? 533 00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:22,200 No, Kansas. 534 00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:24,700 Come on. 535 00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:28,600 My father's a captain in the Navy. 536 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:29,900 My mother's an interior designer. 537 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:30,900 My brother's a surgeon. 538 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,500 My other brother's an attorney. 539 00:20:32,500 --> 00:20:34,000 My sister was Miss San Diego. 540 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:35,200 ( mimics gagging ) 541 00:20:36,900 --> 00:20:38,700 The only really happy moment of my life 542 00:20:38,700 --> 00:20:40,400 is when I ran away to San Francisco 543 00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:41,900 and hung out with Grace Slick. 544 00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:44,100 Do you want to know the lyrics to "White Rabbit," 545 00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:45,300 or can I quit now? 546 00:20:45,300 --> 00:20:47,700 Ah. Boy, it sounds like some 547 00:20:47,700 --> 00:20:50,500 of the kids in your family are pretty successful, huh? 548 00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:52,400 Yeah, well, if you measure success 549 00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,300 in terms of wealth, happiness, 550 00:20:54,300 --> 00:20:57,800 and my father's undying devotion, maybe. 551 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,100 Yeah. Boy, I know. 552 00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:01,400 I got a brother like that. 553 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:04,900 International lawyer. 554 00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:08,200 Handsome, smart, funny. 555 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:10,000 And the guy plays the piano, 556 00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:11,900 and he speaks four languages, 557 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:13,100 flies his own jet. 558 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,300 ( mimics gagging ) 559 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:17,300 Seems like my whole life 560 00:21:17,300 --> 00:21:19,500 I've been trying to get out from under his shadow. 561 00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:21,300 I know just what you mean. 562 00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:25,000 Does he ever come in the bar? 563 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:30,900 No, but, uh, I'll call him, 564 00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:33,200 if you'll call Miss San Diego. 565 00:21:33,300 --> 00:21:34,800 Nah. They'd probably 566 00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:37,000 end up leaving together. 567 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,100 ( both laugh ) 568 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,200 Well, hell, this is kind of 569 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:45,600 a warm and friendly moment, isn't it? 570 00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:47,800 I must admit, 571 00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:50,500 it's a... better moment than I ever thought 572 00:21:50,500 --> 00:21:52,000 I'd have with you. 573 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,900 I'm glad this happened. 574 00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:56,700 Yeah, me, too. Me, too. 575 00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:58,000 Will you excuse me a moment? 576 00:21:58,100 --> 00:21:59,600 Sure. What are you going to do? 577 00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,400 I think I better change. 578 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:08,100 Honesty. 579 00:22:08,100 --> 00:22:09,400 Who would have thought? 580 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:14,800 Say, can I, uh-- 581 00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:16,500 great, great-- can I, uh, 582 00:22:16,500 --> 00:22:18,100 put on some music here? 583 00:22:18,100 --> 00:22:19,400 Sure, be my guest. 584 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,700 ( jazzy music playing ) 585 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,800 ( laughs ) 586 00:22:30,300 --> 00:22:31,900 ( Velcro unfastens ) 587 00:22:59,700 --> 00:23:01,200 I'm gonna be at the gym 588 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:02,700 for a couple of hours. 589 00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:06,000 But you just go right on... 590 00:23:06,700 --> 00:23:08,500 You jerk. 591 00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:10,600 Wha... what? 592 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:12,700 This whole thing about coming over here and painting 593 00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:15,200 is just another stupid attempt to get me into bed. 594 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:18,800 I-I am shocked and... 595 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:21,900 and deeply insulted. 596 00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,400 God. I told you all that personal stuff 597 00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:24,700 about my brothers and my sister 598 00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:26,700 and me being the fattest girl in high school. 599 00:23:26,700 --> 00:23:28,100 Wait a minute. You didn't tell me that. 600 00:23:28,100 --> 00:23:29,300 Well, I wasn't. 601 00:23:29,300 --> 00:23:30,700 Get out. 602 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:32,100 Slow down here. Just li... 603 00:23:32,100 --> 00:23:33,200 I admit it. 604 00:23:33,300 --> 00:23:35,400 I'm a attracted to you. Now, what's the big deal? 605 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:38,000 Is that a crime or something? 606 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,400 You know, are you always this defensive 607 00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:40,800 about people who find you sexy? 608 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,500 No, just you. 609 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:44,000 Is that right? 610 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,900 Well... you know, I'll tell you something, lady. 611 00:23:46,900 --> 00:23:49,200 There was a time when I was considering making love to you, 612 00:23:49,300 --> 00:23:50,600 but now it's out of the question. 613 00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:52,900 As a matter of fact, you know, I wouldn't make love to you 614 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,200 if you asked me, if you begged me 615 00:23:54,300 --> 00:23:55,600 to make love to you, I wouldn't. 616 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:56,700 Go ahead, just ask me. 617 00:23:56,700 --> 00:23:58,100 Just try it. See what happens. 618 00:23:58,100 --> 00:23:59,300 Would you make love to me? 619 00:23:59,300 --> 00:24:00,900 Well, okay, but just once. 41783

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