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1
00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:06,920
Look at me, right?
2
00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:09,520
And look at the Queen.
3
00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:14,120
I was never a fan until it occurred to me
how much me and Ma'am have in common.
4
00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:16,480
Bringing up kiddies
you can't remember the names of.
5
00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:20,160
I know she's not a single parent,
but she might as well be.
6
00:00:20,240 --> 00:00:23,080
Plus, the pair of us,
we've stuck to our guns,
7
00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:26,840
her literally sometimes,
and flagshipped a dying breed.
8
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:29,200
Admired and despised equally.
9
00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:34,800
Not for never lifting a finger, no,
for setting examples through extremity.
10
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,400
And whether you're a bigwig on her end
or a bigwig on mine,
11
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:39,680
you've still got all your dickheads
in the middle to deal with,
12
00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:41,520
snip, snip, snipping at your benefits.
13
00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:46,320
I mean, she can't not be looking at me
and thinking, "What's your secret, Frank?"
14
00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:49,160
I got shot of my kids yonks back,
15
00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:51,240
whereas she's yet to see
the back of a single one.
16
00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:52,440
Fine!
17
00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:54,760
I've had to get out of bed on occasion
to make ends meet,
18
00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:58,040
whereas she,
she's done the whole thing from a chair.
19
00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:01,600
Oh, and a drink for the lady.
20
00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:03,240
Oh, sure, there's perks.
21
00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:06,640
But, look at her lot.
Brian May prancing about on her roof.
22
00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:09,120
Now, look at my lot,
23
00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:13,200
we know how to throw
a proper fucking pa-a-rty!
24
00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:24,720
[Lip] It's not that hard being a parent
in the modern world.
25
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:26,800
It's not like the caveman times.
26
00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:30,040
Back then you'd be protecting your kids
from rampaging tribesmen
27
00:01:30,120 --> 00:01:32,160
and sabre-toothed tigers.
28
00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:34,680
Or the medieval ages,
29
00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:38,120
where if infant mortality
didn't snatch the little buggers off,
30
00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:40,200
then the Black Death
were hammering on the door.
31
00:01:42,120 --> 00:01:44,240
Nah, now it's easier.
32
00:01:44,320 --> 00:01:48,240
Sure you have to make a few sacrifices,
but it's nothing like the past.
33
00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:52,400
As long as you have a bit of spare cash
to buy them clothes and shit,
34
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:54,480
make sure there's food on the table...
35
00:01:56,760 --> 00:01:59,600
and be there for them when they need it,
you're sorted.
36
00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:04,720
Basically, don't be a knobhead
and you'll be fine.
37
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:09,280
[rock music plays]
38
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:14,000
Billy Whizz!
39
00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:15,800
There you go!
40
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:20,640
[rooster crowing]
41
00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:22,480
[cow mooing]
42
00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:24,720
It's not some big mystery, is it?
43
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,720
So how come so many of the twats
fuck it up, eh?
44
00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:44,800
Oi! Hands off.
45
00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:45,960
Just looking.
46
00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:47,280
Just touching!
47
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:49,200
You running away from home?
48
00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:51,760
Overnight excursions with the Scouts.
49
00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:57,240
Pitch a tent, build a fire,
underneath that old wandering star.
50
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:58,280
Can I come?
51
00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:00,320
-You're not a Scout.
-I could be one.
52
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:04,920
Never been in a tent or built a fire
or seen a wandering star.
53
00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:11,040
[indistinct conversations]
54
00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:23,440
[bus bell rings]
55
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,000
[hard rock music plays]
56
00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:50,400
I've got Billy
doing the school pics for me.
57
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:54,680
There's a class set,
individual pics and a family group.
58
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,720
Doesn't matter
how bleeding ugly the kids are,
59
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:59,200
the parents will buy the lot.
60
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:00,640
Pint, please, Karen.
61
00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,880
Eh, Gallagher, you'll need a sick note
for skipping work today.
62
00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:05,760
Eh, I was mugged.
63
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:06,760
Who'd mug you?
64
00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:07,760
Well, they took the lot.
65
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,160
I didn't even have the bus fare
to get back home.
66
00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:12,000
Don't care.
67
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:13,160
£2.50.
68
00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:15,160
Muggers took you for a trip out, did they?
69
00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:16,600
From the hospital.
70
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:19,480
Hang on.
You left here last night with fuck all.
71
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:24,240
You still owe me for six pints and two Es.
So clear your tab or no more.
72
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:27,120
[sighs] Fine.
73
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:29,520
Mimi, payday's not till you know,
any chance?
74
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:30,520
End of the month.
75
00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:34,920
Oh, fine! Abandoned. An outcast.
76
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,200
Oh, God!
77
00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:37,920
Who's going to look after you
in your old age?
78
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,120
I've still got my dignity.
79
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,000
Whoa, whoa, pal, that's mine now.
80
00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:43,600
Get off, you baghead, get off!
81
00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:44,720
Get off!
82
00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:49,920
Dignity my arse.
83
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:55,440
[bus approching]
84
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:01,560
[bus door swoosh]
85
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:03,640
Hiya!
86
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,080
G'us your bag then.
87
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,480
-Good day at the office?
[Katie] Yeah.
88
00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:13,760
Why not? It's just Scouts.
89
00:05:13,840 --> 00:05:15,040
[both] It's just Scouts!
90
00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:16,080
Shut up!
91
00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:17,560
It's sinister!
92
00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,720
Making you dress all the same,
act the same way.
93
00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,800
Little robots with woggles.
94
00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:24,600
You'll thank me one day.
95
00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:26,400
I just want you kids to be, you know--
96
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:27,440
Individuals.
97
00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:28,520
To follow your own path.
98
00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:29,640
Dance to the beat of your drum.
99
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:30,800
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
100
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:31,960
OK!
101
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,960
But I'm still right.
102
00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:37,840
But I know the path I want to follow,
I want to be a Scout!
103
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,160
[all] I want to be a Scout!
104
00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:45,000
[people chattering]
105
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:46,840
But please, Dad!
106
00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:50,000
Lip!
107
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:51,520
Frank.
108
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:52,920
Not your neck of the woods.
109
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:57,840
Well, you know, call it fate. Kismet.
110
00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,240
So you're looking good. Suit, tie.
111
00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:02,280
It's called having a job, Frank.
112
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:04,440
Architect, for the council.
113
00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:06,800
And we're in a bit of a hurry.
114
00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:08,880
Those buildings won't build themselves.
115
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,880
I've seen you before.
116
00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:11,920
On the bus.
117
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,160
Yeah, I thought you were a boy.
118
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:14,160
Thank you.
119
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:17,600
Eh, what'd we say about
talking to strangers?
120
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:20,560
And there's no-one more strange
than your old grandad, eh, Katie?
121
00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:21,600
No way!
122
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:23,360
[Frank giggles]
123
00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:24,760
It's a miracle?
124
00:06:24,840 --> 00:06:27,320
-Well, wouldn't go that far, you know.
-It is.
125
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,320
We thought the Taliban
would never let you go.
126
00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,160
[Lip] Yes, Grandad.
127
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,880
We didn't know if you was dead or alive.
128
00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:38,680
[kids cheering]
129
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,440
Grandad, watch!
130
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,680
Oh, yeah, brilliant, kid, brilliant!
131
00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:50,280
[Lip] How much for you to piss off
and leave us alone?
132
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,760
That's no way to speak to a war hero.
133
00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:54,800
Go on. Take it.
134
00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:58,160
Piss off back down the Jockey,
go and have yourself some fun.
135
00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,480
Don't bother coming back
round these ways ever again.
136
00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,920
Oh, you do live round here then?
137
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,560
Just visiting.
138
00:07:04,640 --> 00:07:05,680
Work.
139
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,040
I'm not after your money.
140
00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:12,080
[Lip chuckles]
141
00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:16,080
What, is it so far-fetched that
I might miss my grandson-- daughter?
142
00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:18,920
About as far-fetched
as Liverpool or Santa Claus
143
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,680
winning the bloody Premier League.
144
00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:25,120
Oh, as far-fetched as me being captured
by the Taliban then?
145
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:28,600
Course, the SAS are dying
to recruit blokes like me, you know.
146
00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:30,200
Catering staff.
147
00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:32,280
You were Army catering staff.
148
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,680
You got kidnapped by mistake.
149
00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:39,480
The Taliban were so fucking embarrassed
they didn't know what to do with you.
150
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,280
You see, Frank?
151
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:46,800
Even in the silliest little lie,
I told my daughter you're still a loser.
152
00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:54,200
Well, fair enough.
153
00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:57,880
Katie!
154
00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:02,520
Your dad wants to know if you want to come
back to mine, for dinner, fish and chips!
155
00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:04,640
Brilliant, kid, brilliant!
156
00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:05,720
[Frank laughs]
157
00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:09,240
D'you hear that? Eh?
Out of the mouths of babes.
158
00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:11,160
You might want to stop off
at the cash machine,
159
00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,400
you know, price of a fish supper nowadays
and all that.
160
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,280
You all right, Frank?
161
00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:21,520
[Frank] No!
162
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,200
Frank?
163
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,760
[clattering]
164
00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:48,080
Don't just stand there,
place won't clean itself.
165
00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:49,520
God, I've got to do everything myself.
166
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:51,400
Didn't know the Social were coming.
167
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,120
They're not. It's Lip.
168
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:54,640
Lip, like my brother Lip?
169
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,480
Yes. He who never visits.
170
00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:58,520
Him and his kid, Katie.
They'll be here in a minute.
171
00:08:58,600 --> 00:08:59,520
-[door rattles]
-What's up?
172
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,840
And if asked, I've been away,
locked up by the Taliban.
173
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:04,480
Frank, what have you done now?
174
00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:06,840
Not me. It's Lip, it's his story.
175
00:09:06,920 --> 00:09:09,760
He's had me Terry waited up
in some far-flung land.
176
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,400
Why would he say that?
177
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,240
I dunno.
178
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,200
Takes all sorts, I suppose.
179
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,800
[utensils clinking]
180
00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:26,320
Right, go to mine, get coffee,
not a jar, the good Yemeni stuff.
181
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,320
It's the only thing strong enough
to cover up this stench!
182
00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:32,640
[clatters]
183
00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:33,680
Is he nice?
184
00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:37,800
He's got a heart of gold.
185
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,760
I'm sure if you remind him
186
00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:42,560
of all the birthdays and Christmases
that he's missed,
187
00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:45,480
y'know, he might, y'know give us--
188
00:09:45,560 --> 00:09:48,080
give you a little something
for your piggy bank.
189
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:55,040
[door rattles]
190
00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,280
[door closes]
191
00:09:57,360 --> 00:09:58,920
Hey, Jamie, I'm in training.
192
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,720
Oh, yeah, what for?
193
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,320
Camping. I got in the Scouts.
194
00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:05,600
I have to carry my own tent.
195
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:06,800
What's your first mission then?
196
00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:11,200
Climbing Everest or surviving the Sahara?
197
00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:12,720
Remona's taking us to a field.
198
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:14,400
Ooh, how exciting.
199
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,040
Y'know this bag's dead heavy?
200
00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:18,080
I believe you, mate.
201
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:20,360
Uncle Jamie, were you ever in the Scouts?
202
00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:23,280
Me and our Shane chucked fireworks
at the Scout hall once.
203
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:24,440
About as close as I got.
204
00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:27,320
I don't think
they could handle your Uncle Jamie.
205
00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,160
What do you mean?
206
00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:31,920
I'm more of a leader than a follower.
207
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:39,600
[women quarrelling]
208
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:43,640
Fuck off!
209
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,560
What was it like here
when you were little?
210
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:48,800
It was nice.
211
00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:50,440
[glass shattering]
212
00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:54,480
[indistinct talk]
213
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:57,440
[tyres screeching]
214
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:01,880
[man] Fucking rats!
215
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:03,840
[engine revving]
216
00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:05,720
It's not very nice now.
217
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,800
Places change, sweetheart.
218
00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:10,680
So, why does Grandad stay here?
219
00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:13,920
Well, the country doesn't look after
war veterans as well as it should do.
220
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,600
It's a shame for Grandad.
221
00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:17,920
Yeah, a real shame.
222
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:25,840
Dad?
223
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:32,280
[thud]
224
00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:36,720
[tyres screeching]
225
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:37,800
[knocking on door]
226
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:42,720
Eh, come in.
227
00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:45,880
Welcome home.
228
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,440
[door closes]
229
00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:57,320
Hi, I'm Esther.
230
00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:58,800
Oh. Are you, uh?
231
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:00,040
God, no.
232
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:01,440
Next door, just the neighbour.
233
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,600
And besides,
I'm totally out of his league.
234
00:12:03,680 --> 00:12:08,520
This is thingy,
a stray we've acquired along the way.
235
00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:11,000
Aidan. Pleased to meet you, sir.
236
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:12,200
Allow me.
237
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,120
And Stella.
238
00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:17,160
Your sister.
239
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:24,520
Hello.
240
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:26,320
It's really nice to meet you.
241
00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:28,040
Sorry it's taken so long.
242
00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,080
Dad said you'll give me a little money.
243
00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:34,120
Where do they get this stuff, eh?
244
00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:36,840
Well, it must run in the family.
245
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:40,840
So, how does it feel to be home?
246
00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:44,440
[Mimi] I've asked you
ten times before, Gallagher.
247
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,200
-Nana!
-Katie, wait, please.
248
00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:50,800
[Mimi] And none
of your half-hearted forgeries!
249
00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:52,840
What are you doing here, sweetheart?
250
00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:55,160
I'm not due to see you till next week.
251
00:12:56,760 --> 00:12:58,760
What's going on, Lip?
252
00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:00,880
Oh, just back for the job, is it?
253
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:01,960
Dad...
254
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:05,000
please.
255
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:07,000
For Katie.
256
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:10,280
Happy families. With her, Granny Shankly?
She's better than me!
257
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:11,400
Don't.
258
00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:13,720
You never told me
you lived near Grandad!
259
00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:15,280
No, I didn't, because--
260
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,240
The Taliban?
261
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:19,080
Yeah, those fellas.
262
00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:20,800
[shuts the door]
263
00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:22,280
Well, you know...
264
00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:27,240
maybe it's time we told the truth.
265
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:31,320
You know, Gallaghers' name
stands for something, doesn't it?
266
00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:33,760
Integrity. Honesty.
267
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:40,000
Look, love. Look.
268
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:44,000
-I was never captured by the Taliban.
-But Dad--
269
00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:45,720
No, no, it's not your dad's fault.
270
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:48,800
Couldn't tell anyone the story.
271
00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:51,640
[sighs]
272
00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:55,800
I was on a mission to find a man,
a very bad man.
273
00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:00,280
Do you know who Osama bin Laden is?
274
00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:04,760
Grandad!
275
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,000
Yeah.
276
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,920
Bin Laden.
277
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,200
Seriously?
278
00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:15,640
Well, you started it
with your tall tales of the Taliban.
279
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:18,720
How long do you think she's going
to buy into that hero bullshit?
280
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:19,720
Dunno.
281
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,000
You used to believe in the Tooth Fairy
till you were 11.
282
00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:22,040
Oh, fuck off.
283
00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:23,080
And you wet the bed.
284
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:26,280
Or shall I just tell her the real truth?
Her dad's a big fat liar.
285
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:27,440
One more word.
286
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:30,520
[Mimi] One more word from either of you
and I'll be cracking skulls.
287
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:33,080
You're not ruining this for me.
288
00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:34,080
It's good you're here though.
289
00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:35,400
Yeah, fantastic.
290
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:36,840
'Cause it's nearly done.
291
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:40,280
I'll nip next door and get it
while she's still playing.
292
00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:41,520
Cilla, come on, babe.
293
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:44,240
Pop home.
294
00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:49,360
[door rattles]
295
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:51,960
And what treat is
Super Gran looking to spring?
296
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:55,520
She's altering Mandy's old Communion dress
for Katie's confirmation.
297
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:56,880
It means a lot to her.
298
00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:59,080
How does she get her trotters
to hold the little needles?
299
00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:02,280
If that's the way she chooses to grieve,
who am I to stop her?
300
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:06,520
Well, my invitation must have got lost,
so let me RSVP in person.
301
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:10,440
[burps]
302
00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:11,560
If you're offering.
303
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,440
[Katie] But you can't be my auntie.
304
00:15:14,520 --> 00:15:15,440
[Stella] But I am.
305
00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:16,600
[Katie] But you're younger than me.
306
00:15:16,680 --> 00:15:18,720
[Stella]
Cilla's your auntie as well, you know.
307
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:20,320
Do you live nearby?
308
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,560
Took us four buses to get here.
309
00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:27,080
Hey, I know the transport system's fucked
but you're only ten minutes away.
310
00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:28,360
I took her the long way round,
311
00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:31,760
so she knows exactly
how far away Grandad lives.
312
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:36,520
So enjoy it while it lasts
because we're a long way from home.
313
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:53,640
[boy] Hey! What's up?
314
00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:58,600
I don't know what this whole
badass routine is about, Blanco.
315
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:00,200
But it doesn't suit you.
316
00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:02,680
Maybe I don't want to be
like everyone else.
317
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,920
Go and get the rest of your uniform!
318
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,600
[kid] Go, go, go, go.
319
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:10,560
[Stella giggles]
320
00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:15,880
Did they torture you?
321
00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:19,600
Oh, they did unspeakable things.
322
00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:21,040
Like what?
323
00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:22,880
You're a right little tom boy, aren't you?
324
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,640
No, she's not. It's a phase.
325
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:27,840
Maybe if her gran was allowed
to spend more time with her,
326
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,320
she wouldn't feel the need
to act up so much.
327
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:30,400
She's not acting up!
328
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,360
Really?
When did she last wear a dress? Make-up?
329
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:33,360
Not this again.
330
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:35,840
Oh, for God's sake, Lip,
she hasn't even got her ears pierced.
331
00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:36,920
She's nine, y'know.
332
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:37,920
I think we best be getting back.
333
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:40,040
Sit down, there's no rush.
334
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:41,760
I'll put the kettle on.
335
00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:45,920
Katie, tell your dad how you're glad to
spend a little more time with your gran.
336
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,000
[Frank clears throat]
337
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,120
And your granddad.
338
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:51,840
Please, Dad, can we? Please?
339
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:53,200
Please?
340
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:54,200
Course you can.
341
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:57,680
You can visit any time you want,
now that your grandad's home.
342
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:02,160
[door rattles]
343
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:07,200
Granny Maguire seems pretty
determined to keep you here.
344
00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:08,359
She's got an agenda, that one.
345
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:09,680
And you don't?
346
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:11,000
Eh, I'm on your side.
347
00:17:11,079 --> 00:17:13,400
-You have never been on my side.
-Oh, fuck.
348
00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:17,520
Y'know what, just go and take a walk,
cool down or you'll blow a fucking gasket,
349
00:17:17,599 --> 00:17:19,880
and you don't want to do that
in front of your kids, messes 'em up.
350
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:21,599
You're giving me parenting advice?
351
00:17:21,680 --> 00:17:23,319
[Frank sighs]
352
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:26,480
Katie, darling, your dad's going
to have to stretch his legs, love.
353
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,119
You'll be alright here with Stella.
354
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:31,320
Pick us up 40 fags while you're out.
355
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:38,440
No broken home to go back to?
356
00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:39,720
Fuck off, paedo!
357
00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:46,560
Bad news, my little Bandita.
358
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,640
Permission for take off's been denied.
359
00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:55,000
No, I've got the money,
it's just my time that's being pillaged.
360
00:17:55,080 --> 00:17:56,960
Me son's coming round,
361
00:17:57,040 --> 00:17:59,800
just invited himself without any thought
how it might disrupt my day.
362
00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:01,320
You know how selfish kids can be.
363
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:04,240
Yeah. I'll call to reschedule.
364
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:07,880
Will you two stop that?
365
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,440
Or I'll kick your fucking heads in!
366
00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:11,600
[kid groans]
367
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:14,560
[indistinct talk on TV]
368
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:16,400
I mean it, Gallagher.
369
00:18:16,480 --> 00:18:19,080
Don't you mess this up for me.
370
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,760
You're the ones who built
your little Sylvanian Family on sand.
371
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:25,120
Whose fault is that?
372
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:28,840
I only get to see her every few weeks
because Lip can't stand you.
373
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,120
You have poisoned that
boy's mind against me.
374
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,600
We used to be like that.
375
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,160
-Really?
-Yeah.
376
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:38,000
So you've been sending him cash, have you?
377
00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:43,040
To help him take care of his little one,
each week, into a special account?
378
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:45,520
Thought not.
379
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,840
He should be taking care of me
in my advancing years.
380
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:52,520
He's got enough problems
bringing Katie up, you selfish fuck!
381
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:57,280
Come on, Slater,
we're waiting on that water.
382
00:18:57,360 --> 00:19:00,400
Chop, chop, chop, chop, chop, chop!
383
00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:03,520
Put some elbow grease in it...!
384
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:06,360
This is no holiday camp,
this is the Scouts!
385
00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,920
Come on, guys, seriously! It'll be cool!
386
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,080
[cows mooing]
387
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:12,600
Is it ready?
388
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:14,920
We can't eat
till the billy cans are ready.
389
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,440
Get them in, get them in!
390
00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:19,320
Out the way, out the way!
391
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,400
It's all right, don't panic.
392
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,360
You, Blanco! You!
393
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:28,040
Oh, shit.
394
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:33,800
[dog barking in distance]
395
00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:43,240
Fuck me.
396
00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:44,960
Is that still your best chat up line?
397
00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:46,920
Fails every time.
398
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,160
What are you doing here?
399
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:50,360
Right now, avoiding my piss-soaked dad.
400
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:53,080
The rest is a long story.
401
00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:55,360
-Coming in?
-Nah, you're all right.
402
00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:57,000
Where you going then?
403
00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:58,280
Generally?
404
00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:00,160
Well, come on.
405
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:03,000
I'll buy you a pint if you promise
not to share and care.
406
00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:07,840
Come on, warm beer,
shit company, bad entertainment,
407
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,160
don't pretend you haven't missed it, mate.
408
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,000
[sighs]
409
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:12,480
As long as you're paying.
410
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:25,200
[people cheering]
411
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,360
[people chattering]
412
00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:35,960
You seen Coggsy?
413
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:39,680
[camera clicks]
414
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:43,640
I know I'm good looking,
415
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,480
but you shouldn't be staring
at your punters.
416
00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:48,040
Lip Gallagher, all grown up.
417
00:20:48,120 --> 00:20:50,360
Did you start shopping at Next?
418
00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:53,000
You know me, always was a bit of class.
419
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:55,040
And always full of it.
420
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:56,520
So you're doing OK I can see.
421
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:57,960
It's the spirit of Chatsworth.
422
00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:01,600
It'd take more than a global recession
to stop this lot having a good time.
423
00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:03,080
-Pint?
-Yeah.
424
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:10,560
Her husband?
425
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:13,680
Mimi never said owt.
426
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:15,720
She probably worries you'd judge her.
427
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:18,200
Some people do, you know,
'cause of the age gap.
428
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,040
It's not for me to say.
429
00:21:20,120 --> 00:21:23,480
But, don't you think it's a bit oedipal?
430
00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:24,600
Edible?
431
00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:29,520
Come to me.
432
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,160
Easy, Lillian, people will be...
433
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:33,240
talking.
434
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:35,520
Well, you did always have a way
with the ladies.
435
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:37,520
Never lose it. [giggles]
436
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:40,800
[indistinct talk on TV]
437
00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:44,360
There you go.
438
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:48,440
Isn't she a pretty little girl?
439
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:49,840
She's fine as she was.
440
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:51,040
Do you think so?
441
00:21:51,120 --> 00:21:54,480
Your grandad's busy watching
his show right now, isn't he?
442
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,480
[indistinct talk on TV]
443
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:58,920
Stop twitching, love.
444
00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:02,960
[indistinct talk on TV continues]
445
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:06,320
So do you reckon
this'll be a regular thing then?
446
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,080
Like fuck. I left for a reason.
447
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:11,560
Frank's not changed a bit, he's cleaned
me out twice, had nearly all of my wages.
448
00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:13,920
And Mimi's just trying
to stick her nails right in me.
449
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,680
A simple no was all I wanted.
450
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:17,720
[giggles]
451
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,200
This is not a good Scout.
452
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:22,520
-Hey, hands off him!
-[Remona] He ruined the camp!
453
00:22:22,600 --> 00:22:24,400
[Esther] I'm sure you're exaggerating.
454
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,720
Look at him.
Absolutely no respect for the badge.
455
00:22:32,200 --> 00:22:35,080
What? It's only fucking Scouts.
Sit down, have a drink.
456
00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:37,160
-What did you say to him?
-Nothing.
457
00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:39,000
You ruined the camp.
458
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:42,040
What you having?
459
00:22:42,120 --> 00:22:43,160
Gin and tonic.
460
00:22:43,240 --> 00:22:44,440
-Same.
-Same.
461
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:46,440
[Esther] Shut up, you!
462
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:49,240
Not as easy as we thought, eh?
Being a parent.
463
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:51,080
It's not easy having one, either.
464
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:52,560
You still turned out OK.
465
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:53,960
Yeah, not because of him.
466
00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:55,000
Despite.
467
00:22:55,080 --> 00:22:56,200
He has got a job.
468
00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:57,640
So why's he tapping me up?
469
00:22:57,720 --> 00:23:00,240
'Cause he needs it more than you.
He's a janny, for God's sake.
470
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:02,920
You're a big shot architect.
471
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,960
Surveyor's assistant.
472
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:12,360
I barely scraped my degree, Karen.
473
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:13,400
I rent.
474
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:16,000
I shit myself every time
a bill comes through the door
475
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:18,400
and my daughter dresses like a boy.
476
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,560
But I'm still fucking there.
477
00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:22,080
And I'm doing my best.
478
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:25,320
-Whatever that is.
-So is Frank.
479
00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:27,760
I mean, he didn't have
to take Aidan on, but he did.
480
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:29,920
When did you start seeing a halo
round his head?
481
00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:32,160
Still sulking like you used to and all?
482
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,080
We know Frank is a selfish bastard,
483
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:36,360
but I don't think
you should let him get to you.
484
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:40,680
Look, you are not that kid anymore.
You're a man!
485
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:43,280
If you fancy me just say so.
486
00:23:43,360 --> 00:23:45,840
Yeah and still a twat, Phillip Gallagher.
487
00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:47,800
Fuckin' twat... It's a cig machine.
488
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:50,400
I'm getting off.
489
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:51,920
[Billy] Oh, c'mon, mate,
stay for a few more.
490
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:53,800
[Shane] Yeah, pool tournament
starts in an hour.
491
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,760
No, I've got to get back home.
492
00:23:56,840 --> 00:23:58,960
I mean to Dad's.
493
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,080
It's two steps away from paint stripper,
but you know what they say?
494
00:24:02,160 --> 00:24:03,600
Beware Greeks bearing gifts.
495
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,880
I'm just gonna dash next door
and put this away.
496
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,000
You be all right with your grandad?
497
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:11,040
Watch her!
498
00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:12,960
Why, is she going to explode?
499
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,320
[indistinct talk on TV]
500
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:26,320
I like your hair.
501
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:27,600
Really?
502
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:30,760
[indistinct talk on TV continues]
503
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,040
What matters is if you like it, you know.
504
00:24:33,120 --> 00:24:36,280
Don't live your life
trying to please others.
505
00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:38,240
You'll only end up messing it up
for yourself.
506
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:40,720
But won't that upset people?
507
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:44,760
And? We're Gallaghers. We do it our way.
508
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:48,920
[indistinct talk on TV continues]
509
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:52,360
I'm glad you killed Bin Laden.
510
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:54,600
Oh, yeah, me too. He was an awful c--
511
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:06,080
[indistinct chatter]
512
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:11,320
You alright?
513
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,600
[siren wailing in distance]
514
00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:16,160
[indistinct chatter continuous]
515
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:17,920
[Frank] Look at her, see.
516
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:22,320
Four of 'em running around trying
to give her the wedding of her dreams...
517
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:26,800
dress, car, pink meringues, you name it.
518
00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:29,160
They're all waiting around like twats
to see if she likes it.
519
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:30,360
And does she? Does she fuck?
520
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:33,040
She hates it,
she hates everything about it.
521
00:25:33,120 --> 00:25:34,880
-And you know what she does?
-[door rattles]
522
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:36,640
She tells them.
523
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:38,360
And fair play to her.
524
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,360
It's the same with you and this dress.
525
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:42,560
It's up to you. You choose.
526
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:43,680
Hi, Dad.
527
00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:44,960
You OK, sweetheart?
528
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:48,720
Oh.
529
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:50,600
-That for me?
-No. It's for me.
530
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,040
If you've got a clean glass though?
531
00:25:55,120 --> 00:25:56,720
Oh, beware Greeks bearing gifts.
532
00:25:56,800 --> 00:25:58,320
Not you as well.
533
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:03,120
I was thinking about
staying for the weekend.
534
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,680
Well, as long as you're happy
to pay board.
535
00:26:07,720 --> 00:26:10,280
I have brought shame both
on myself and my office.
536
00:26:10,360 --> 00:26:12,840
Won't they be missing you
in middle class suburbia?
537
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:15,920
It's not as glamorous as you've imagined.
538
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:18,560
Lord Melrose, who quit his position
on Monday,
539
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:21,480
when it was revealed
he had used rent boys...
540
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:24,520
-It's a fucking real!
-He is fucking joke!
541
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:27,360
Jesus, skeletons in the closet.
542
00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:28,800
At least he's out the closet.
543
00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:32,120
Well, well, and fucking truly now,
never going to go back in again.
544
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,080
Think he put it on the expenses?
545
00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:48,440
You moved!
546
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:50,360
Let's have a look.
547
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:51,840
Hope you made me look handsome.
548
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:55,040
Yeah. It's really good.
549
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:00,400
That's my family box.
550
00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:08,360
You look different now.
551
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:10,840
Shut up, Stella!
552
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,200
[remembering]
Carl! Your tits are ready!
553
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:20,040
You can pay for a fuck.
554
00:27:20,120 --> 00:27:21,320
Do it your fucking self!
555
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:22,840
It's not about me, Lip.
556
00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:23,840
It was me.
557
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:26,080
[kids chattering]
558
00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:27,680
Stella!
559
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:28,920
Coat on, Stella.
560
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:30,920
Come here while I get this slide
in your hair.
561
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:32,320
You look like no-one owns you.
562
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:35,680
We thought we'd take the kids to the park.
563
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:36,680
Give you a break.
564
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:38,760
At least let me do breakfast.
565
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:40,440
I'm quite domesticated these days.
566
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:45,840
Frank up yet?
567
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:48,280
He goes next door for breakfast.
568
00:27:48,360 --> 00:27:50,760
He said he didn't want to come with us.
569
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:52,160
Don't worry, we'll feed them.
570
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:54,320
Well, I'll stock up whilst you're out.
571
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:55,400
What's your favourite food?
572
00:27:55,480 --> 00:27:56,400
Chocolate milk.
573
00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:57,560
Yay! Chocolate milk!
574
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:00,840
Come on, kids! Last one to the swings.
575
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:03,760
Don't you be sitting around here all day,
worrying, neither.
576
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:08,320
[door shuts]
577
00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:19,040
Do you think it's weird?
578
00:28:19,120 --> 00:28:20,120
What?
579
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:21,800
Boy George over there.
580
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:24,320
Well, no other fucker seems
to want to face up to it.
581
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:25,640
Probably just a phase.
582
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:29,560
I work with kids.
I know what I'm talking about.
583
00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:31,520
Just her and him the whole time...
584
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:34,320
there's no mother figure.
585
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:35,880
She's unbalanced.
586
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:41,160
If we keep it nice with Lip and Frank,
I could get more time with her,
587
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,880
be that maternal influence.
588
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:45,680
Maybe she's just different.
589
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,080
A rug muncher?
590
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:50,040
Do you mean do I think she's a lesbian?
I don't know.
591
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:55,200
I couldn't care less if she grows up to be
an Olympic class muff-diver
592
00:28:55,280 --> 00:29:00,400
just so long as she isn't doing the full
KD Lang thing at her first holy communion.
593
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:01,760
I think he's struggling.
594
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:03,520
[kids chattering]
595
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:11,360
You always manage to get your feet
under the table somewhere.
596
00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:13,120
And I don't have to dress up, either.
597
00:29:13,200 --> 00:29:14,520
Any idea what you look like?
598
00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:16,120
Yeah.
599
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:17,240
An adult.
600
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,280
Oh, he fills his daughter's head with lies
but the twat's wearing a tie,
601
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,640
so he's a fucking adult now.
602
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:24,320
What's Stella's favourite food, Frank?
603
00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:27,240
Chocolate milk.
604
00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:30,280
So you know.
605
00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:31,680
Just trying to help you.
606
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:40,640
Like I was on my period out me arse,
the blood was gushing.
607
00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:42,440
You didn't help me.
608
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:43,600
Oh, here he is.
609
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:44,800
Got your Chatsworth on.
610
00:29:44,880 --> 00:29:47,480
Yay!
611
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:50,280
I wasn't going to say anything before
612
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,000
but you did look like a right twat
in that suit.
613
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,360
Don't hold back.
614
00:29:53,440 --> 00:29:55,720
I wasn't. Come on.
Let's go fuck shit up!
615
00:29:55,800 --> 00:29:56,880
Oh, my god.
616
00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:00,480
Ugh, man!
617
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:01,680
Believe me--
618
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:02,720
He's in!
619
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:04,280
Go on, son!
620
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:05,760
Is it not like this round your way, then?
621
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:07,440
-How do you mean?
-Like it's posh, innit?
622
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,000
Like big swanky apartments.
623
00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:10,440
Nah.
624
00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:11,800
It's not that swanky an apartment.
625
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,640
Come to check out my arse, paedo?
626
00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:17,320
Oh, fuck off. Who'd paedo you?
627
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:18,680
Give us that. Come on.
628
00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:20,080
He's definitely got something.
629
00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:23,920
Specialised market
for goggle eyes and acne.
630
00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:25,560
Come on, darling, make love to the camera.
631
00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:26,840
Fuckin' paedo...
632
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,720
That's it, work it, baby!
633
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:29,760
Hoi!
634
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:31,840
Hey, Dad, come check out these paedos!
635
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:32,960
Fucking perverts!
636
00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:35,720
Even if I was a pervert,
I wouldn't touch him!
637
00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:36,760
That's fucking it!
638
00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:38,880
[laughter]
639
00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:54,840
I'm gonna kill you! Wait!
640
00:30:58,600 --> 00:30:59,600
[door shuts]
641
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:08,440
Having expended all his energy
swimming upstream for no reason at all,
642
00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:13,800
the Chatsworth male eventually
stops fighting it and goes with the flow,
643
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:19,000
back to the spawning ground
to occupy his correct place in society.
644
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:20,360
[gasps]
645
00:31:20,440 --> 00:31:21,600
Order is restored.
646
00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:22,600
Drink.
647
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:23,640
I need the toilet.
648
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,680
Go on, then, upstairs to the toilet.
649
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:28,160
Nice look.
650
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:29,960
Temporary.
651
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:31,200
How was that then, sweetheart?
652
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:32,720
Great.
653
00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:37,160
We were thinking it might be nice to
spend a bit of time together as a family.
654
00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:40,560
-Jockey later?
-Yeah, OK.
655
00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:43,000
Granddad, will you come with us?
656
00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:46,560
Well, I'm not feeling too good.
657
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,320
You know, might have to take a rain check.
658
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,400
Old war wounds.
659
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:52,040
Better give your granddad
some peace and quiet.
660
00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:53,640
Yeah, let's get a cup of tea.
661
00:31:53,720 --> 00:31:54,800
He's all talked out.
662
00:31:57,480 --> 00:32:00,200
Ground control to Major Tom.
We have liftoff.
663
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:05,360
Ah, you.
664
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:06,680
Listen, mate.
665
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:07,760
I'm sorry about earlier.
666
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:09,080
We were just having a laugh.
667
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:10,360
I was being a dick.
668
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:13,000
Please accept my apology.
669
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:16,760
Yeah, sure.
670
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:22,080
[Lip groans]
671
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:24,480
Just go around picking up fucking kiddies,
do you?
672
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:27,040
Katie, run now!
673
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,360
[groans]
674
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:37,480
You OK?
675
00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:51,160
Take cover!
676
00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:53,560
[laughter]
677
00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:55,080
Bandits at six o'clock!
678
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:04,960
Ow, ow!
679
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:07,680
Fuck's sake. Hold on.
680
00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:11,240
-What?
-Ow!
681
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:12,960
I think I've got a splinter.
682
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:18,680
She was terrified.
683
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:19,880
I should never have brought her here.
684
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:21,000
[groans]
685
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:22,680
Are we really that bad?
686
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:24,560
-I'm messing up.
-You're not.
687
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:26,280
She's a great kid.
688
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:28,680
She came here, met our lot and coped.
Like you did.
689
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,520
This is coping?
690
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:32,520
What if I'm getting it all wrong?
691
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,080
What about the way she dresses?
692
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:36,160
Is she happy?
693
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:38,880
How do I know if she's happy?
694
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:40,120
Are you happy?
695
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:48,000
Oh, Lip.
696
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:51,520
Sorry.
697
00:33:57,280 --> 00:33:58,760
Sorry, Frank.
698
00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:01,160
Can't seem to stop crying.
699
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:03,920
It's Biddy, won't come near me.
700
00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:06,360
Hasn't humped me or thumped me for days.
701
00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:08,239
Ow!
702
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:09,800
Got it.
703
00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:11,520
Big bastard that.
704
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:13,080
Have I lost it, Frank?
705
00:34:13,159 --> 00:34:14,880
Never, my little bandit.
706
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:19,360
What's the matter with you now?
707
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:22,679
Sympathy pains.
708
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:24,719
[sobs]
709
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:29,239
Katie's fine.
710
00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:31,080
Mam and Shane are regaling
her with stories of...
711
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:33,400
something funny.
712
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:35,120
[sighs]
713
00:34:35,199 --> 00:34:36,320
Thanks.
714
00:34:38,159 --> 00:34:41,760
Right, better be getting Katie back home.
715
00:34:41,840 --> 00:34:44,840
Lip, she's got a family here.
You both have.
716
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:46,679
You are putting all this pressure
on yourself.
717
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:48,800
This daft lie with Frank.
718
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:52,679
He's a shit, so what?
You do not let him cost you all of us.
719
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:56,120
Thanks.
720
00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:06,720
[man] Coggsy!
721
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:10,240
He won't come back, will he?
722
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:12,080
No, sweetheart.
723
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,520
Uncle Jamie chased him away.
724
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:19,000
I like Jamie and Karen and Billy.
725
00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:20,480
I like them all.
726
00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:23,480
They like you, too.
727
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:28,720
-Your orders: if you choose to accept--
-Frank.
728
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:31,160
No talking in line, soldier.
729
00:35:31,240 --> 00:35:32,400
Frank!
730
00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,120
What the fuck's going on?
731
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:38,920
Oh, come on--
732
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,440
[both] No, Frank!
733
00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:42,080
No, we've got morals!
734
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:43,760
He doesn't even live here!
735
00:35:47,720 --> 00:35:49,320
Thank you very fucking much.
736
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,120
Oh, you're angry at us?
737
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:55,680
A working man gets one day a week to spend
his hard-earned money as he sees fit
738
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:59,360
and the disappointing fruit of his loins
comes along and fucks it up.
739
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,920
I need to speak to Katie, alone.
740
00:36:02,000 --> 00:36:03,320
Well, I'm out of pocket now,
741
00:36:03,400 --> 00:36:04,800
so bung us a tenner,
I'll be out your hair.
742
00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:07,840
I haven't got any!
You've had the last of my wages.
743
00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:11,160
Granddad,
why have you got your uniform on?
744
00:36:11,240 --> 00:36:12,880
Do you have to go back?
745
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:14,520
No, love.
746
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:17,520
And let's get one thing straight.
747
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:22,280
I am not, and have never been part
of Her Majesty's armed forces.
748
00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:24,840
Your dad lied to you!
749
00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:27,160
Every night you were praying,
hoping I'd come back?
750
00:36:27,240 --> 00:36:30,800
I was always here,
only one bus ride away!
751
00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:34,400
Take my advice: don't believe
a word he tells you, ever again!
752
00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:35,640
He's full of it.
753
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:40,560
Is that it, then?
You just drop a bomb and walk off?
754
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,440
Combat references. How appropriate.
755
00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:43,480
You're a cunt.
756
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,560
Hey, you're all still alive!
757
00:36:45,640 --> 00:36:48,200
Her up the road's got three dead.
Go and call her a cunt!
758
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:51,200
I thought the job was over
once you'd pulled your dick out?
759
00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:52,360
You're repulsive.
760
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:54,440
You're fucking disgusting!
761
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,640
You gave me nothing!
762
00:36:56,720 --> 00:36:58,360
What the fuck do you want?
763
00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:02,480
Ever since you arrived,
you've been sorry for yourself,
764
00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:05,640
desperation oozing out
of every insignificant,
765
00:37:05,720 --> 00:37:07,760
under-achieving little pore!
766
00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:09,120
[thud]
767
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:14,120
I did give you something.
768
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:17,520
I gave you fucking freedom
and you can't even use it
769
00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:21,360
because everything you do, every decision
you make is about me, isn't it?
770
00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:22,840
You carry me up here.
771
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:24,720
Yeah, keep fucking walking.
772
00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:26,720
I'm with you every single step!
773
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:34,800
[indistinct talk on TV]
774
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:36,760
[chuckles]
775
00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:42,640
Oi, Zippy and Bungle.
Nearly did meself an injury there.
776
00:37:42,720 --> 00:37:43,680
Where's your Dad?
777
00:37:43,760 --> 00:37:44,920
Dunno, not here.
778
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,160
Lucky bastard.
I'm off to have me breakfast.
779
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:52,960
[siren wailing in distance]
780
00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:57,760
[Karen] Oh, there you are.
781
00:37:59,280 --> 00:38:00,400
Your breakfast's ready.
782
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:08,480
All right! Fucking coming!
783
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:12,520
Can I help you, sir?
784
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:14,400
You not got a home to go to?
785
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:15,600
Ha-ha, very funny.
786
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,000
Do us a pint.
787
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:21,000
Trying it out for size?
788
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:23,360
I could do without a lesson in morals
from you.
789
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:24,800
It's been a hard night, OK?
790
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:26,520
If it looks like a tramp
and smells like a tramp.
791
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:27,520
I don't want to talk about it.
792
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:29,800
Well, then why are you hammering
my door down at the crack of the arse?
793
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:31,880
You might not want to talk,
but you're gonna fucking listen.
794
00:38:31,960 --> 00:38:33,160
Graduate of Mimi Maguire's
School of Counselling--
795
00:38:33,240 --> 00:38:34,840
Look at the state of you, Lip!
796
00:38:34,920 --> 00:38:37,080
You've been back 48 hours
and you're a fucking mess!
797
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,880
I am embracing my fine heritage.
798
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:42,400
You was the one who told me to go out
and have a bit of fun.
799
00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:44,800
And it looks like
you're laughing it right up.
800
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:47,920
Oh, and while you were out last night
embracing your fine heritage,
801
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:49,920
have you any idea where your daughter is?
802
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:56,200
[door shuts heavily]
803
00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:57,240
Where's your dad?
804
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,360
He's not here. Lucky bastard.
805
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:00,600
He didn't come home.
806
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:03,640
OK, sweetheart,
you're coming back with me.
807
00:39:03,720 --> 00:39:04,720
Shouldn't I stay here with her?
808
00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:05,840
Come on!
809
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:10,320
Orphan Annie there ain't my problem.
810
00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:14,720
No granddaughter of mine is living
in this shit tip like this any longer.
811
00:39:16,320 --> 00:39:17,360
See ya!
812
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:21,200
[door closes]
813
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:27,160
If there's a lesson I can give you,
it's that men are thick as fuck.
814
00:39:27,240 --> 00:39:30,680
That's how I know it must be hard,
only having your dad to talk to.
815
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:36,360
I can see why you've made
the choices you've made.
816
00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:41,520
It's just that carrying on like this
isn't helping anyone.
817
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:45,440
It's not your fault, love,
having the dad you've got.
818
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:50,440
I picked this up for you.
819
00:39:55,240 --> 00:39:56,760
Pretty, isn't it?
820
00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:59,080
None of us wants to be a boy.
821
00:39:59,160 --> 00:40:02,880
Imagine going through life being
one of those lanky streaks of piss.
822
00:40:02,960 --> 00:40:04,760
Why don't we try it, eh?
823
00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:05,960
See how it feels?
824
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:18,240
Do you want something?
825
00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:22,680
Or is acting creepy as fuck
another one of your quirks?
826
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:25,240
Just watching a leader at work.
827
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:27,280
More afternoon drinking with Frank, is it?
828
00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:29,840
You need to deal
with this Scouts business.
829
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:32,960
I'll talk to Remona,
offer to pay for any cow damage.
830
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:34,840
I meant with Saul!
831
00:40:34,920 --> 00:40:36,120
He'll get over it, kids do.
832
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:38,040
He shouldn't have to get over it.
833
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:40,440
Scouts is something he wanted to do.
834
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:43,560
Before Uncle Big Balls came along
and wasted it for him.
835
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:45,280
That wasn't my intention.
836
00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:48,280
You made him feel like a twat
so he acted like one.
837
00:40:48,360 --> 00:40:52,640
So now you and your big
swinging ball sack need to sort it.
838
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:59,040
Oh, you look gorgeous.
839
00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:00,400
[inaudible]
840
00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:02,600
[door opens]
841
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:05,080
Me and Katie
have been having a great time.
842
00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:07,000
Take it off, love. We're going home.
843
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:08,160
Stay as you are.
844
00:41:08,240 --> 00:41:10,200
I think your dad here's
a little bit confused.
845
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,960
You can't just stick her in a dress, Mimi.
846
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:14,800
She's not bloody Barbie!
847
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:16,400
No, she thinks she's fucking Ken.
848
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:19,800
Take the dress off!
849
00:41:24,680 --> 00:41:26,920
[indistinct talk on TV]
850
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:31,000
The prodigal son trick
is to go back the once.
851
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:33,440
Law of diminishing returns with you.
852
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:34,600
We're leaving.
853
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:39,320
Oh, he's come back to tell us
he's going away.
854
00:41:39,400 --> 00:41:42,120
I'm sorry. Again.
855
00:41:42,200 --> 00:41:43,640
It's OK.
856
00:41:43,720 --> 00:41:44,720
Don't worry.
857
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:47,640
He'll be back when the next
existential crisis hits him.
858
00:41:47,720 --> 00:41:50,080
Another failure
to hang on his poor old dad.
859
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:51,720
It's Katie's communion next week.
860
00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:55,120
I won't stop you coming.
861
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:59,320
Well, bear with me while I deal with
the overwhelming emotion of the moment.
862
00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:05,200
Come on, sweetheart.
863
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:20,280
Oh, sloppy work, Nazir.
864
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:21,400
I could blow that one down myself.
865
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:23,040
Go, get me cows!
866
00:42:23,120 --> 00:42:25,120
-You said cows?
-Now then, boys, look.
867
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,480
This is how it should be done.
868
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:29,880
Well, Baloo helped me.
869
00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:31,520
Well done, Baloo.
870
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:36,560
[all] Well done, Baloo!
871
00:42:36,640 --> 00:42:40,640
Well done to you! Well done, Baloo!
872
00:42:40,720 --> 00:42:42,000
Well done to you!
873
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:43,920
[thunder rumbles]
874
00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:56,720
[church bell chiming]
875
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:00,440
[people chattering]
876
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:05,240
Oh, the camera loves you.
877
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:08,960
[Mimi] State of them, they're supposed
to be marrying the baby Jesus.
878
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:14,400
Oh, will you look at that?
879
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:15,720
She's like an angel.
880
00:43:17,080 --> 00:43:19,120
It's not too late
to change your mind, you know.
881
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:20,400
Well, it makes Nana happy.
882
00:43:22,080 --> 00:43:25,120
That's no reason to do something
if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
883
00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:27,960
[people chattering]
884
00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:30,480
Grandad said we're Gallaghers,
we do it our own way.
885
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:33,000
Yeah. That's usually the bloody hard way.
886
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:38,640
Hiya, gorgeous.
887
00:43:38,720 --> 00:43:40,560
Hiya, sweetheart.
888
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:41,600
-Hey, mate.
-Mwah.
889
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:42,960
You look fabulous.
890
00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:45,720
[Shane] You got off lightly,
she were going to make you wear this.
891
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:48,760
[Lip] Love your shoes.
892
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:49,800
She's pretty.
893
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:51,280
Let's do it.
894
00:43:51,360 --> 00:43:52,840
[indistinct talk]
895
00:43:52,920 --> 00:43:54,160
[Shane] Give me something.
896
00:43:54,240 --> 00:43:55,200
Frank?
897
00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:56,320
He knows it's on.
898
00:44:11,160 --> 00:44:13,560
You may enter the boardroom.
899
00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:18,280
[Lip] Now in the 17th century,
900
00:44:18,360 --> 00:44:21,880
your parents might have
handed you off to a wet nurse,
901
00:44:21,960 --> 00:44:25,440
that's a woman who breastfeeds
you so your ma doesn't have to.
902
00:44:25,520 --> 00:44:27,480
I mean, that's brilliant!
903
00:44:27,560 --> 00:44:30,720
Spend your early years
sucking on a stranger's tits.
904
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:33,000
And meanwhile, Dad just stands there,
905
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:35,280
the spare prick at the wedding,
so to speak.
906
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:40,520
Because we never have that
same bond that mothers do.
907
00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:43,600
We never carry the little ones
around inside us.
908
00:44:43,680 --> 00:44:46,320
[Frank] The job's more or less finished
after you've pulled your dick out.
909
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:49,320
[Lip] Except it's not.
And that's the big secret, isn't it?
910
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:51,480
[Frank] We're terrified of our kids.
911
00:44:51,560 --> 00:44:54,520
Little strangers taking over our lives.
912
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:58,920
[Lip] We don't always fuck up
because we're twats.
913
00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:01,520
[Frank] It's because we don't know
what else to do.
914
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:08,640
So thank fuck for the extended family.
915
00:45:08,720 --> 00:45:10,520
Well, most of 'em anyway.
916
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:14,800
[Randall] You know I need to hear it,
those three little words.
917
00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:16,000
I'm here to see Remona.
918
00:45:16,080 --> 00:45:17,080
Piss off, Dad.
919
00:45:17,160 --> 00:45:18,920
[Randall] A little secret
between you and her?
920
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:20,440
For fuck's sake.
921
00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:24,200
[Randall] I am tired of seeing her
buzzing around you like a fly on shit.
922
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:25,200
What are you doing here?
923
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:26,680
He's taken me passport.
924
00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:28,400
If I'm going to get her out of here,
925
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:32,080
I need you to get him off our backs
while I do it.
926
00:45:32,160 --> 00:45:33,760
He's not doing it for love, is he?
927
00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:36,320
Come on, you've got a plane to catch.
928
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:37,280
You're not going anywhere.
929
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:23,760
[Jamie] ♪ Kumbaya, my Lord, kumbaya ♪
930
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:28,080
♪ Kumbaya, my Lord, kumbaya ♪
931
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:29,360
All right, Baloo?
932
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:31,000
You're not scared, are you?
933
00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:40,000
Touch me and I'll cut your hands off.
934
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:43,480
[turns off]
935
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:45,040
[Remona] Sleep tight.
66748
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