All language subtitles for Fresh Off The Boat S02e18 Week Review.eng

Okay, you ready
to do our Week in Review?

It really shouldn't be
called a Week in Review

because we're figuring
out the upcoming week.

Okay, so how about we call
it the Week in Preview?

Or we call it Stephanie.

Michelle Pfeiffer's character in
"Grease 2."

It's kind of the perfect movie.

Agree to agree.

So, this week, what do we got?

Okay, well, the investment property

has finally been cleared of black mold,

so I need to get the house listed.

And a convention's in town,

so Cattleman's is going to be busy.

Don't forget all the boys' stuff.

We don't want a repeat of last week.

I can't believe I forgot to
bring Emery his toothpicks.

Hang tight, Clyde.

I'm sure he'll be here any minute now.

[Sighs]

Well, this week,

nothing is falling through the cracks

because of my new secret weapon.

My wristband. [Chuckles]

Just like the one

NFL quarterback Kordell Stewart uses.

It's filled with
schedules and to-do lists.

Like right here, it says,
"Get Emery's toothpicks."

And, uh, ooh, here I made a
note that Wednesday afternoon,

you and I have the whole
house to ourselves...

for four minutes.

[Chuckling] Louis.

And you know I only need two.

[Chuckling] Louis.

Shall I pencil you in... twice?

Oh, Louis.

[Chuckles]

Our Week in Review is a great system.

I love how we're a team.

Me too. Team Lessica!

[Chuckles]

Jouis?

I'll keep thinking.

S02E18
Week in Review

sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com

[School bell rings]

[Scoffs] Dude, Mr. G sucks!

He marked all of these answers wrong

just because I didn't show my work.

What happened to being mysterious?

Let it go, man.

I need everybody focused on the
student-faculty basketball game.

There's a pizza party on the line,

and I do not want a repeat of last year.

Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!

So good.

- Mmm.
- Mmm!

- Mm-mm-mmm!
- Mmm!

I wish you could taste how good this is.

Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!

- Mmm!
- Mmm!

This year, I want victory... and pizza.

Why do you get to be coach?

Take a lap.

Don't worry, coach.

We're gonna win.

I got mad skills.

I'm sorry.

Were you playing basketball or
trying to do the "Macarena"?

Sidebar...
Bar Mitzvah season is approaching.

May I suggest that we all
brush up on our "Macarenas"?

But I just mastered the "Tootsee Roll."

- "Mastered" is generous.
- Better than you.

I'm a little white kid
flirting with scoliosis.

That's your bar?

Looking good.

So, this is the broker's magazine

we need to get the house listed in.

Shouldn't Grandma Huang be here?

I mean,
she's an investor in the property, too.

She said she had a previously
scheduled appointment.

[Crowd chanting] Jerry! Jerry!

Jerry! Jerry! Jer...

So,
the deadline to get into the next issue

is Friday at 5:00 p.m.

How about I write the
copy and take the pictures

and you stage the house?

Great. Staging is my specialty.

I used to help the
Tampa Police Department

re-create crime scenes.

[Door closes] Louis: Don't mind me.
I know you're working.

I had to run some errands

and thought I would
surprise my favorite ladies

with some lunch.

Louis, thank you.

Honey: [Chuckling] That is so sweet.

We're so lucky to have
such supportive husbands.

- Mm.
- Honey.

You know where my shirt
with the blue flowers is?

Yes, it's in the pile that's
got to go to the cleaners.

But I was gonna wear it to
lunch at the club today.

Well, I've been really busy
with the investment property...

which, of course [chuckles] you know

because you've been so supportive,

which is why you're happy

to take the shirt to
the cleaners yourself?

Yeah.

I guess I'll just cancel. [Chuckles]

What is this?

Oh, my homework's on the back, Mr. G.

My mom likes to recycle paper.

She wrote a note on the bottom.

Jessica: "Dear Teacher, Paper is paper."

Excuses from your mom

aren't gonna help you
on the basketball court.

Hold up. You're on the faculty team?

Hey, Trent, we can cancel practice!

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

You would want to cancel practice.

I know you don't like to work.

You certainly don't like to show it.

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

Well, I heard you don't like to show up,

like for your son's birth.

Heard you missed that.

- Oh, no, he didn't!
- Aw, shoot!

Ohhhhhh!

I was a little late.

By the time you could see the head,
I was in the room!

But it's cool. It... It's totally cool.

You know what?
You even score on me, one basket...

No homework for the whole
class for the rest of the year.

- Whoa!
- Aw, man!

And if I don't score on you,
you can give me double homework.

[Gasps] What?

Deal.

Eddie, what were you thinking?

He's a grown man.

He drives an Explorer,
Eddie Bauer edition.

Guys, relax. I got this.

That doesn't count. I had an itch.

[Sighs]

Dude, stop.

"For each property description,
we charge 19 cents per word."

[Whistles] Steep.

"House good. You buy."

You know,

this is that four-minute
window Wednesday afternoon

we have the whole house to ourselves.

Louis.

[Both giggle]

I've been so efficient
because of my wristband,

I even had time to
pick us up a French CD.

So extravagant.

I got it on loan from the library.

[Laughing] Oh, Louis!

No!

Keep it on.

[Door opens] Oh.

[Music stops] Eddie!

It's the middle of the day.
What are you doing here?

They sent me home.

I have lice!

[Dramatic chord plays]

- Lice?
- It's going around school.

The nurse said I had it

and I couldn't come
back until it was gone.

We didn't come to this country
so our son could get lice.

It's so awesome.

I can't go to school,
which means I can't play

in the student-faculty basketball game.

Lice?

Oh, here.
The nurse gave me this pamphlet.

It has all the info you need.

Uh, uh, just put it on the table.

Back away. Go.

"A Parent's Guide to Lice."

Okay, uh, first,
we have to get a special shampoo.

Lice.

We also have to vacuum,
wash, and disinfect

anything Eddie has touched in
the past 24 hours... Ugh...

And, uh,
anything he will come into contact with.

I have a better idea.

[Dramatic chord plays]

Well, this obviously
throws a wrench in things,

but we can do this.

Jessica: I bet he got lice
from sleeping over at Dave's.

All that orange soda made his blood
sweet, and then the lice came.

I don't think drinking
soda gives you lice.

You're telling me

lice see an innocent
child in a dirty home

drinking a sweet soda and
they don't want in on that?

Lice live for that.

They're the pedophiles
of the insect world.

Well, it doesn't matter how he got it.

We have to get rid of it,
which is why...

One is for everyday scheduling.
One is for tackling lice.

Okay.
Now, I'll get the treatment shampoo,

and I know you were
supposed to take photos

of the flip house today,
but maybe you could send Honey.

_

_

Ma, it's the '90s. We're a team.

_

_

Okay. So,
the instruction sheet also says no hugs.

Hugs are a surefire
way to transmit lice.

Also, all stuffed animals need
to be isolated for 24 hours.

Well, at least Eddie doesn't play
with stuffed animals anymore.

I have lice.

[Dramatic chord plays] It's spreading!

Eddie is like the monkey from
"Outbreak."

Bao-bao.

My baby.

[Dramatic chord plays]

[Dramatic music playing]

I'm sorry.

The needs of the many
outweigh the needs of the few.

[Evan shrieks]

At least poke air holes in the top.

You mean lice doors? No.

Evan, quit your yapping.

Mom's got it all wrong.

Being homeless is awesome.

This is terrible.

Come on.

Won't it be nice to take a
little break from school?

It's like you don't even know me.

What's going on?

We have lice.

[Dramatic chord plays]

Wait. How come I don't have lice?

I mean,
how do you not want to be up in this?

[Whoosh!] [Funky music plays]

Lice are straight fools.

Hey, Sharlene.
Remember what we talked about?

How I got to stop following you home

and looking through your bedroom window?

It's just a simple tip on
how to be a good friend.

Thanks, Emery.

[Whispering] I love you.

[Knock on window] Emery,
stay away from them!

They are diseased!

Hey, Dad,
did you remember my toothpicks?

Oh, shoot!

Ah, it's right there in the crack.

What if the H.O.A. finds out about this?

They already know I'm
scared of the dark.

This is too many skeletons in my closet.

Calm down. Having lice is great.

You get to hang out with your big bro.

You get to spend all day outside...

Uhp, wiener's ready!

Hey, Em-dog, can you go inside
and throw me out some ketchup?

I want to douse my Hebrew.

Eddie, Evan, okay,

we just need to put this
shampoo in your hair,

and lice will be gone tomorrow.

But the basketball game's tomorrow!

That's too soon!

Let's do it! Team Jess-ouis!

I'll keep thinking.

Don't you die on me!

Ahh. All clear.

Yes!

Ugh! Lice!

Yes! Ugh. I don't understand.

How come the treatment worked
on Evan and not on you?

Guess lice just can't get enough,

can't get enough of this Eddie stuff.

Wait, no, Big Red, keep your distance!

Eddie is diseased!

[Glass thuds]

Mr. G says the bet is still on.

No way!

If I can't play in the game,
the bet is off.

That's not how he sees it,
and he just upped the ante.

Now, I heard that Eddie's gonna miss

the student-faculty
basketball game today

because of "lice."

Maybe he'll be magically
cured once he finds out,

if he doesn't show up,

I'm gonna give all of
you double homework.

[Indistinct shouting]

May I go to the bathroom?

I walked straight here.

The sharp part kept
stabbing me in the butt.

He can't give the whole
class double homework.

That wasn't the bet.

Well, he is,

and if you don't show up after school

and score a basket on him,

those lice will be the
only friends you have left.

I got to get back before home ec.

We're making beignets.

So, these are the photos
I took of the flip house.

You can't see the house.

I know. Cool, right?

It's the suggestion of house.

I was going for a feeling.

I mean, isn't it more
interesting to create a feeling?

Or, if you want, we can retake them

and do pictures that
actually show the house.

Let's do that.

That's a great idea, Honey.

Um, how's it going with the lice?

It's awful.

Just hearing the word "lice"
makes me want to scratch.

Oh.

Yeah. It's been like this all day.

I mean,
I know it's just in my mind, but...

Man,
those conventioneers made me feel dumb.

Like I'm the only person
to ever confuse the NCAA

with the NAACP.

I have lice.

[Dramatic chord plays]

Lice? Parents can get lice?

That wasn't in the pamphlet.

I need you to get me
the treatment shampoo.

Then we need to vacuum and
wash everything all over again.

Plus, now we have to do
the sheets in our room.

Also, I still have to take
pictures of the flip hou...

What... What are these for?

I'm out.

What do you mean, you're out?
Louis, I thought we were a team!

And I appreciate that... but I'm out.

_

Ma, please!

[Sighs] I'm going to Honey and Marvin's.

You're leaving?

Well, Eddie gave it to Evan.

Evan gave it to you.

It's only a matter of time
before you give it to me,

and that can't happen.

I have to provide for this family.

- I run a business.
- So do I.

Well...

Are you saying your career
is more important than mine?

- Well...
- Okay, I see.

So, you're fine supporting my career

as long as it doesn't
get in the way of yours.

I support your career.
I babysit the kids all the time.

It's not babysitting
if they're your kids.

Well, this week, I did the laundry.

I vacuumed.

I even remembered Emery's toothpicks.

That's just being a parent.

Well, I'm not blaming you they got lice.

Why would you blame me?!

Well, I mean, you're the mother.

And you're the father.

Exactly.

"Exactly" what?!

Louis, I thought we were a team.

And I appreciate that... but I'm out.

[Door opens]

_

_

[Cheers and applause]

Defense! Defense!

[Cheers and applause]

Time out!

[Whistle blows]

I don't even know why we're playing.

Even if we win,
we still get double math homework

because Eddie didn't score a basket.

We're doing it for the pizza, Dave.

Or have you forgotten what
this game is really about?

Principal Hunter's playing dirty.

He keeps pinching my arm
when no one's looking.

Pinch, pinch, pinch, pinch,
pinch, pinch, pinch, pinch!

Not a foul if the ref doesn't call it.

Mmm! Pizza!

My slice is so big,
I got to fold it in half.

I ate so much pizza,
now I have to make more.

[Sighs]

[Hums]

[Chuckles]

Heard there was a game today.

Eddie!

You got rid of your lice!

Nah. I still have it.

He can't be here. He has lice.

Then go remove him from the gym.

I'm not going near him.

I have a date tonight.
I shaved and everything.

Well, I'm not doing it. I have horses.

I wasn't about to let you
guys get double homework.

You could have come before
there were six seconds left.

You know I like to make an entrance.

Hit it!

Okay. Hit it!

Let's do this.

Walter,
just pass me the ball and stand back.

Hey, I'm not afraid of you or lice.

Once you miss the birth of your son,

you're not afraid of anything.

I'm gonna drive to the hole.

Bring it.

[Grunts]

[Gasps]

[Cheers and applause]

But you said you were
gonna drive to the hole.

That's a technical foul for lying!
Come on, Carl!

[Crowd shrieking]

I'm a businessman who runs a restaurant.

I had no choice but to leave.

Absolutely.

You know, between us,

this whole
"men and women sharing the workload,"

"it's the '90s" business...
I give it 10 years, tops.

[Both laugh]

Well, I mean, I'm fine chipping in,

- pulling my weight...
- I know. I know.

Y-You're good at the talk. Me too.

Coming, dear!

- Honey: What?
- See?

[Chuckles]

Ah, sure is different
from our generation, huh?

[Both laugh]

Hey,
why don't I mix us up some Gin Rickeys?

Remember at the start of the war
how we used to kick those back?

[Both laugh]

I'm not sure I was even born then.

Aw, poor Jessica. I feel so bad for her.

I know. Lice is the worst.

I'm sure that's why you guys agreed

that it's better for you to come here

so you don't get it yourself.

Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, there's no sense
in us both getting lice.

- I mean, you run a business.
- Thank you.

And she's a Realtor.

And she takes care of three kids,

your mom, the investment property.

She runs the house,

gets the kids off to school,
makes dinner every night.

Oh, man. Dinner's pesky.

Dinner always gets me.

She really does a lot, doesn't she?

Well, I mean, she's able to

because you're there to support her.

That's why you guys
are such a great team.

Marvin: Coming, dear!

Why does he keep doing that?

He never comes.

Stop. You don't have to do that.

What are you doing here?
I thought you were out.

What's that?

Just open it.

I went to your investment property

and I re-took the pictures
for the broker's magazine

so you can still make your deadline.

I can see the house.

[Exhales sharply] That's all I wanted...

Pictures where you can see the house!

New sheets?

We're burning the old ones.

Neither of us should have to
do any more laundry tonight.

I'm sorry.

I guess I'm not as evolved
as I thought I was.

I don't want to just say we're a team.

I want us to actually be equal partners.

Me too.

[Chuckles]

Come here, Team Jessi-Lou.

That's not bad. [Chuckles]

It's like a country girl
who has sex too young.

Mm.

No, you can't hug me. I have lice.

Then we'll have lice together.

[Chuckles]

Louis, I just want you to know

that if you get lice,

I'm putting you outside with Eddie.

I know. I've always known.

[Sighs]

Emery: Mom, Dad, come here!

Let's do this, Clyde.

You got this, buddy.

There we go! You got it, Clyde!

Come on, Clyde! Oh!

Yes! Yay! Ah!

I knew he could do it!

- Whoo-hoo!
- You did it, Clyde.

[Knock on window]

Mmmh.

This pizza is so good.

This sucks.

Boo!

Man, Eddie, you really came through...

in a pinch.

How'd you pull off that crazy fake?

And then sink a three-pointer?

I don't know.

Maybe the lice shampoo
gave me super powers,

like Spiderman.

This could be my origin story.

I'm probably still learning
how to harness my powers.

sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com

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