All language subtitles for Empty Nest s06e08 No Volunteers, Please

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,344 --> 00:00:04,937 - MEL TORME! YEAH, MY MAN. 2 00:00:04,977 --> 00:00:07,596 THE VELVET FOG. YES, SIR. 3 00:00:08,359 --> 00:00:09,775 VIC DAMONE. 4 00:00:09,894 --> 00:00:11,792 GREAT SET OF PIPES OVER THERE. 5 00:00:12,863 --> 00:00:15,278 DINAH SHORE. WHOO-HOO-HOO! 6 00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:20,932 BOY, CAN SHE PUTT. [chuckles] 7 00:00:21,305 --> 00:00:22,773 WHAT ELSE WE GOT? [doorbell rings] 8 00:00:22,810 --> 00:00:24,112 OH, OKAY. 9 00:00:26,377 --> 00:00:27,543 [Dreyfuss panting] 10 00:00:27,578 --> 00:00:28,877 DREYFIE? 11 00:00:28,913 --> 00:00:30,979 - I FOUND HIM OVER ON GREENWOOD STREET. 12 00:00:31,015 --> 00:00:32,648 - OH, OH. COME IN. 13 00:00:32,816 --> 00:00:34,983 DREYF, HOW DID YOU GET OUT AGAIN? 14 00:00:35,019 --> 00:00:37,342 - YOU KNOW, I SAW "DR. WESTON" ON THE TAG, 15 00:00:37,389 --> 00:00:38,893 AND I WONDERED IF IT WAS YOU. 16 00:00:38,989 --> 00:00:40,322 IT IS YOU. 17 00:00:42,726 --> 00:00:44,326 - WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 18 00:00:44,361 --> 00:00:46,756 UM, DO WE KNOW EACH OTHER? 19 00:00:46,819 --> 00:00:48,363 - MARTY'S COFFEE SHOP? 20 00:00:48,399 --> 00:00:51,337 YOU USED TO BE GRIDDLE CAKES, NO BUTTER, SYRUP ON THE SIDE, 21 00:00:51,375 --> 00:00:54,570 TOAST DRY, HALF A GLASS OF WATER WITH ONE ICE CUBE. 22 00:00:54,605 --> 00:00:56,496 YOU WERE NO TROUBLE AT ALL. 23 00:00:57,643 --> 00:01:00,652 - OH, YEAH. YOU'RE--YOU'RE, UM, 24 00:01:00,753 --> 00:01:02,572 DON'T TELL ME, DON'T--DON'T TELL ME. 25 00:01:02,888 --> 00:01:04,164 DON'T TELL ME. 26 00:01:04,941 --> 00:01:06,405 YOU'RE... 27 00:01:08,211 --> 00:01:09,369 TELL ME. 28 00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:12,217 - DORIS. 29 00:01:12,586 --> 00:01:15,885 - OH, YES. DORIS, DORIS. SIT DOWN. 30 00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:19,764 GEE, I HAVEN'T BEEN IN MARTY'S PLACE IN, I DON'T KNOW, AGES. 31 00:01:19,819 --> 00:01:21,231 - NO ONE HAS. 32 00:01:21,524 --> 00:01:24,195 MARTY BURNED IT DOWN FOR THE INSURANCE. 33 00:01:26,362 --> 00:01:28,487 - SO, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN DOING? 34 00:01:28,572 --> 00:01:30,430 - OKAY, I GUESS. 35 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:33,509 - WELL, MY SISTER DIED LAST YEAR. 36 00:01:33,544 --> 00:01:35,778 - OH, I'M, I'M SO SORRY TO HEAR THAT. 37 00:01:35,813 --> 00:01:37,112 THAT MUST BE REAL HARD. 38 00:01:37,148 --> 00:01:38,847 - OH, I'M FINE, DR. WESTON. 39 00:01:38,883 --> 00:01:40,770 I HAVE MY MACRAME. 40 00:01:43,087 --> 00:01:45,107 - YOU KNOW, IT-IT-IT MIGHT HELP 41 00:01:45,392 --> 00:01:46,955 TO BE AROUND OTHER PEOPLE. 42 00:01:46,991 --> 00:01:50,062 - I'D HATE TO NEGLECT MY MACRAME. 43 00:01:50,728 --> 00:01:53,462 - YEAH, YEAH, I UNDERSTAND. I UNDERSTAND. 44 00:01:53,501 --> 00:01:56,392 BUT YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN VOLUNTEERING AT THE CANAL STREET CLINIC, 45 00:01:56,434 --> 00:01:58,935 AND IT'S-- AND IT'S VERY REWARDING. 46 00:01:59,020 --> 00:02:01,403 AND, WELL, WE COULD USE SOME HELP. 47 00:02:01,438 --> 00:02:03,071 - DO YOU THINK I COULD? 48 00:02:03,107 --> 00:02:05,264 I REALLY ENJOY HELPING PEOPLE. 49 00:02:06,777 --> 00:02:09,178 YEAH, I THINK I'D LIKE TO TRY THAT. 50 00:02:09,213 --> 00:02:11,079 - GREAT! THAT'S GOOD, TERRIFIC. 51 00:02:11,115 --> 00:02:12,993 WELL, I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING YOU DOWN THERE. 52 00:02:13,185 --> 00:02:15,029 - OH, HEY, CAN I BORROW THIS? 53 00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:17,402 - SURE. - I JUST LOVE MICHAEL JACKSON. 54 00:02:17,437 --> 00:02:20,416 - TH-TH-THAT'S LENA-- THAT'S--THAT'S LENA HORNE. 55 00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:29,047 - LIFE GOES ON, AND SO DO WE 56 00:03:26,025 --> 00:03:28,087 - LAVERNE, WHEN'S DELIVERY ON THAT X-RAY FILM? 57 00:03:28,127 --> 00:03:29,627 - AH, DON'T FRET, DR. DOUGLAS. 58 00:03:29,662 --> 00:03:32,028 I'M ON IT LIKE A CHICKEN ON A JUNE BUG. 59 00:03:33,429 --> 00:03:34,959 GIVE ME THE LEO IN SHIPPIN'. 60 00:03:35,027 --> 00:03:36,459 - DR. WESTON. 61 00:03:36,824 --> 00:03:40,526 - OH, DORIS, HI! YEAH, I'M GLAD YOU CAME DOWN. 62 00:03:40,561 --> 00:03:42,861 WAIT. EXCUSE ME JUST FOR A MOMENT. 63 00:03:42,897 --> 00:03:44,430 MAXINE, DEAR, UH... 64 00:03:44,465 --> 00:03:46,064 I'M SORRY, I MEANT TO RUN THIS BY YOU, 65 00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:49,368 BUT THIS IS DORIS, AND SHE'S INTERESTED IN VOLUNTEERING. 66 00:03:49,403 --> 00:03:50,885 - A VOLUNTEER? 67 00:03:51,305 --> 00:03:53,539 HI. I'M DR. DOUGLAS. YOU GET ONE WEEK OFF IN AUGUST. 68 00:03:53,574 --> 00:03:54,973 - I GUESS I SHOULD TELL YOU 69 00:03:55,009 --> 00:03:57,209 THAT I DON'T HAVE MUCH BACKGROUND IN THIS. 70 00:03:57,244 --> 00:03:58,777 - ANY MEDICAL EXPERIENCE AT ALL? - NO. 71 00:03:58,813 --> 00:04:00,145 - ADMINISTRATIVE? - NOT REALLY. 72 00:04:00,181 --> 00:04:01,814 - EVER SEEN GENERAL HOSPITAL? - OH, SURE. 73 00:04:01,849 --> 00:04:03,388 - WELCOME TO THE TEAM. 74 00:04:06,253 --> 00:04:07,719 - OH, HERE. 75 00:04:07,755 --> 00:04:09,188 LAVERNE, LAVERNE, THIS IS DORIS. 76 00:04:09,223 --> 00:04:10,651 SHE'S GONNA HELP OUT AROUND HERE. 77 00:04:10,706 --> 00:04:13,372 - WELL, PRAISE THE LORD AND PASS THE AMMUNITION. 78 00:04:14,728 --> 00:04:18,464 LEO! YEAH. IF YOU DON'T GET ME THAT X-RAY FILM 79 00:04:18,499 --> 00:04:21,776 BY THE END OF THE DAY, YOU GONNA BE NEEDIN' X-RAYS. 80 00:04:22,903 --> 00:04:25,378 UH-HUH. THAT'S MORE LIKE IT. 81 00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:28,207 I LOVE TO MAKE 'EM WEEP. 82 00:04:29,070 --> 00:04:30,776 HELLO, DORIS. PLEASED TO MEET YOU. 83 00:04:30,811 --> 00:04:32,177 COME ON, LET'S GET YOU A LOCKER. 84 00:04:32,213 --> 00:04:34,747 - MY GOODNESS, YOU WERE VERY IMPRESSIVE ON THE PHONE. 85 00:04:34,786 --> 00:04:36,255 IT GAVE ME CHILLS. 86 00:04:36,517 --> 00:04:38,717 I'D ALWAYS WISHED I COULD BE THAT ASSERTIVE. 87 00:04:38,752 --> 00:04:40,145 - IT'S A GIFT. 88 00:04:42,256 --> 00:04:44,448 - ONE OF THOSE GIFTS YOU CAN'T RETURN. 89 00:04:52,166 --> 00:04:56,101 - OKAY, SALAMI, BOLOGNA, CAPICOLA, MORTADELLA. 90 00:04:56,136 --> 00:04:58,740 AH. SPAM. 91 00:05:00,608 --> 00:05:02,650 LUNCHMEAT OF THE GODS. 92 00:05:04,645 --> 00:05:07,114 HEY, CAROL. HEY, MYSTERY BABE. 93 00:05:08,482 --> 00:05:10,420 - IGNORE HIM. HE JUST EATS HERE. 94 00:05:10,918 --> 00:05:13,248 THAT POWER WALK NEARLY DID ME IN. 95 00:05:13,521 --> 00:05:15,754 IT MUST BE ALL THIS EXTRA WEIGHT I'M CARRYING AROUND. 96 00:05:15,789 --> 00:05:18,290 - OH, TELL ME ABOUT IT. MY BACK IS KILLING ME. 97 00:05:18,325 --> 00:05:19,491 - OH, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. 98 00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:23,295 MY BREASTS WERE SWINGING LIKE 50 POUND SANDBAGS. 99 00:05:25,633 --> 00:05:27,537 - HAVE THEY STARTED LEAKING? 100 00:05:32,072 --> 00:05:35,774 - LEAKING? MY SOCKS ARE WET. 101 00:05:39,508 --> 00:05:42,097 BUT THE WETNESS I CAN LIVE WITH, IT'S THE CRAMPS. 102 00:05:42,516 --> 00:05:45,412 IT'S LIKE SOMEBODY'S TYING A GRANNY KNOT IN MY COLON. 103 00:05:49,657 --> 00:05:53,292 - CONSTIPATION. - CONSTIPATION? 104 00:05:53,327 --> 00:05:55,555 IT FEELS LIKE I'M TRYING TO PASS A GLACIER. 105 00:06:02,102 --> 00:06:03,902 LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT IT ANY MORE. 106 00:06:03,938 --> 00:06:05,930 JUST MAKES MATTERS WORSE. - RIGHT. 107 00:06:06,841 --> 00:06:08,938 - BUT YOU DO KNOW WHAT THE WORST IS. 108 00:06:09,510 --> 00:06:10,870 both: HEMORRHOIDS! 109 00:06:19,119 --> 00:06:21,090 - THIS IS GONNA BE SO GREAT. 110 00:06:21,989 --> 00:06:24,161 US BEING OXFORD PARENTS TOGETHER. 111 00:06:24,536 --> 00:06:26,091 - I'M SORRY, OXFORD PARENTS? 112 00:06:26,126 --> 00:06:28,220 - THE OXFORD ACADEMY PRESCHOOL. 113 00:06:28,598 --> 00:06:30,841 CAROL, THE WAITING LIST IS YEARS. 114 00:06:31,454 --> 00:06:33,664 YOU MEAN YOU HAVEN'T ENROLLED YOUR FETUS? 115 00:06:36,403 --> 00:06:39,304 - WELL, ACTUALLY, I HADN'T DECIDED WHICH PRESCHOOL-- 116 00:06:39,340 --> 00:06:41,636 - HONEY, THERE ARE NO OTHER PRESCHOOLS. 117 00:06:41,936 --> 00:06:44,977 WITHOUT OXFORD, YOU'LL NEVER QUALIFY FOR HUNTINGTON PRIMARY. 118 00:06:45,012 --> 00:06:46,912 - I WON'T? - AND WITHOUT HUNTINGTON, 119 00:06:46,947 --> 00:06:49,014 LYCEE FRANCAIS IS OUT OF THE QUESTION. 120 00:06:49,049 --> 00:06:50,504 - OH, MON DIEU! 121 00:06:52,353 --> 00:06:53,652 - WELL, THEN ANDOVER'S OUT, 122 00:06:53,687 --> 00:06:55,554 WHICH MEANS YOU CAN KISS YOUR YALE GOOD-BYE. 123 00:06:55,589 --> 00:06:58,123 - WHAT IF I HAVE A SON? HE WON'T BE A YALE MAN. 124 00:06:58,158 --> 00:06:59,594 - YALE MAN? 125 00:06:59,712 --> 00:07:02,058 HE'LL BE LUCKY IF HE'S AN ORKIN MAN. 126 00:07:04,498 --> 00:07:07,044 - BOY, THE ONLY THING THAT WOULD MAKE THIS DAY BETTER 127 00:07:07,076 --> 00:07:09,436 IS IF TOMMY LEE JONES WALKED THROUGH THAT FRONT DOOR 128 00:07:09,474 --> 00:07:11,237 WEARIN' NOTHIN' BUT SPEEDOS. 129 00:07:14,174 --> 00:07:15,841 - WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SO HAPPY ABOUT? 130 00:07:15,876 --> 00:07:18,884 - DORIS. SHE ANSWERED THE PHONE, SHE DID THE FILIN', 131 00:07:18,915 --> 00:07:21,553 SHE TOOK THE INVENTORY. THAT WOMAN IS A GODSEND. 132 00:07:21,899 --> 00:07:24,313 - LAVERNE, I PICKED UP YOUR DRY CLEANING. 133 00:07:26,543 --> 00:07:28,256 - AND SHE DELIVERS. 134 00:07:29,918 --> 00:07:31,317 - DORIS, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. 135 00:07:31,353 --> 00:07:34,827 - OH, GO ON, YOU'RE MUCH TOO IMPORTANT AROUND HERE. 136 00:07:35,245 --> 00:07:36,704 - TELL A FRIEND. 137 00:07:38,627 --> 00:07:40,960 - I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW YOU KEEP TRACK OF EVERYTHING. 138 00:07:40,996 --> 00:07:42,629 I'VE GOT A THOUSAND QUESTIONS. 139 00:07:42,664 --> 00:07:43,896 - WELL, ANYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW 140 00:07:43,932 --> 00:07:45,264 YOU CAN ASK MAXINE OR ME. 141 00:07:45,300 --> 00:07:47,322 - COURSE, THEY'LL JUST GO GLASSY-EYED AND SAY 142 00:07:47,353 --> 00:07:48,835 "ASK LAVERNE." 143 00:07:50,238 --> 00:07:51,371 - I WAS THINKING, 144 00:07:51,406 --> 00:07:53,573 MAYBE YOU COULD COME UP TO MY PLACE TONIGHT, 145 00:07:53,608 --> 00:07:55,985 SORT OF BRIEF ME. I'LL MAKE DINNER. 146 00:07:56,467 --> 00:07:58,778 - WELL, SURE. IF IT'S NO TROUBLE. 147 00:07:58,858 --> 00:08:00,580 I COULD USE A LITTLE HOME COOKIN', 148 00:08:00,615 --> 00:08:02,891 HARD AS I WORK A-RUNNIN' THIS PLACE. 149 00:08:04,452 --> 00:08:06,452 - AND, YOU KNOW, I'VE GOT A RED HAIR RIBBON 150 00:08:06,488 --> 00:08:08,655 THAT'LL GO BEAUTIFULLY WITH THAT SWEATER. 151 00:08:08,690 --> 00:08:10,495 - WELL, YOU DON'T THINK THAT'LL BE TOO MUCH RED. 152 00:08:10,543 --> 00:08:12,798 - NOT FOR A FIREBALL LIKE YOU. 153 00:08:13,895 --> 00:08:16,554 - TSS! - [laughing] 154 00:08:20,751 --> 00:08:23,318 - HARRY, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. 155 00:08:23,353 --> 00:08:24,486 DON'T YOU THINK DORIS 156 00:08:24,521 --> 00:08:26,708 GOT ATTACHED TO LAVERNE AWFULLY FAST? 157 00:08:27,391 --> 00:08:28,723 - WELL, I-I THINK DORIS 158 00:08:28,759 --> 00:08:30,792 IS JUST VERY ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT HER WORK. 159 00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:32,794 - HMPH. REGIS AND KATHIE LEE 160 00:08:32,829 --> 00:08:35,730 AREN'T THAT ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT THEIR WORK. 161 00:08:35,884 --> 00:08:37,026 - OH, BOY. 162 00:08:42,824 --> 00:08:44,432 - MM-HMM. 163 00:08:45,145 --> 00:08:47,470 - GOOD MORNING. WHERE'S LAVERNE? 164 00:08:47,571 --> 00:08:49,704 - OH, SHE CALLED TO SAY SHE'D BE A LITTLE LATE. 165 00:08:49,748 --> 00:08:51,402 AND GUESS WHAT SHE TOLD ME. 166 00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:55,205 IT SEEMS DORIS MADE HER A LOVELY DINNER LAST NIGHT. 167 00:08:55,355 --> 00:08:58,023 WITH CANDLES AND WINE 168 00:08:58,065 --> 00:08:59,877 AND MUSIC. 169 00:09:04,146 --> 00:09:05,479 - SOUNDS FRIENDLY. 170 00:09:05,514 --> 00:09:07,514 - TOO FRIENDLY. COME ON, HARRY. 171 00:09:07,550 --> 00:09:09,889 YOU EVER MADE DINNER LIKE THAT FOR ANOTHER MAN? 172 00:09:13,823 --> 00:09:15,055 - ONCE WHEN I WAS IN THE SERVICE, 173 00:09:15,090 --> 00:09:16,834 BUT THAT'S A LONG TIME AGO. 174 00:09:18,294 --> 00:09:20,961 MAXINE, COME ON! YOU'RE MAKING TOO MUCH OF THIS. 175 00:09:20,996 --> 00:09:23,163 - I'M NOT MAKING TOO MUCH OF THOSE. 176 00:09:23,199 --> 00:09:25,948 TWO DOZEN ROSES TO LAVERNE FROM DORIS. 177 00:09:28,604 --> 00:09:30,140 I READ THE CARD. 178 00:09:31,721 --> 00:09:32,940 - MAXINE! 179 00:09:32,975 --> 00:09:34,908 - WELL, THERE WAS NO ENVELOPE, HARRY. 180 00:09:34,944 --> 00:09:36,243 I WAS JUST WALKING BY. 181 00:09:36,278 --> 00:09:38,386 YOU'D HAVE TO BE BLIND NOT TO SEE IT. 182 00:09:49,859 --> 00:09:51,090 - I DON'T SEE IT. 183 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,397 - UNDER THE BABY'S BREATH, WAY IN THE BACK. 184 00:10:05,274 --> 00:10:06,673 - WAIT A MIN-- WAIT A MINUTE. 185 00:10:06,704 --> 00:10:09,137 WAIT A MINUTE. SO DORIS SENT LAVERNE SOME FLOWERS. 186 00:10:09,173 --> 00:10:10,439 WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? 187 00:10:10,474 --> 00:10:13,286 - OOH-WEE! LOOK AT THEM ROSES. 188 00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:16,271 THEY MUST BE ROMANCE IN THE AIR. 189 00:10:20,684 --> 00:10:23,961 'CAUSE NOTHIN' SAYS LOVIN' LIKE ROSES BY THE DOZEN. 190 00:10:25,823 --> 00:10:28,827 WHO THEY FOR? - ALL YOURS, BLONDIE. 191 00:10:30,385 --> 00:10:32,842 - WHERE'S THE CARD? - UNDERNEATH THE BABY'S BREATH. 192 00:10:33,998 --> 00:10:35,964 WELL, I MEAN, IT'S BACK IN THERE SOMEWHERE, I GUESS. 193 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,066 I DON'T KNOW. 194 00:10:37,086 --> 00:10:39,586 - WELL, I'M A-- I'M A PUSHOVER FOR ROSES. 195 00:10:39,734 --> 00:10:42,348 - YOU MIGHT WANNA REEXAMINE THAT ATTITUDE. 196 00:10:46,510 --> 00:10:49,678 - OKAY. LET'S SEE WHAT POOR LOVESICK PUPPY SENT THESE. 197 00:11:04,695 --> 00:11:05,827 DORIS? 198 00:11:05,863 --> 00:11:07,753 - PFFT. IMAGINE THAT. 199 00:11:10,258 --> 00:11:11,907 - WELL, YOU--YOU DON'T THINK... 200 00:11:14,438 --> 00:11:16,719 THAT DORIS IS A TAD SMITTEN WITH ME. 201 00:11:17,441 --> 00:11:20,275 - OH, COME ON. THIS--THIS COULD MEAN ANYTHING. 202 00:11:20,310 --> 00:11:22,422 - I VOTE FOR THAT SMITTEN DEAL. 203 00:11:24,372 --> 00:11:26,682 - YEAH. I'M THINKIN' OL' DORIS 204 00:11:26,717 --> 00:11:28,518 IS TRACTORED ON A PLOW STRAIGHT. 205 00:11:35,005 --> 00:11:36,771 I JUST HAVE TO HAVE ME A LITTLE TALK WITH DORIS, 206 00:11:36,806 --> 00:11:38,748 TELL HER I AIN'T INTERESTED. 207 00:11:40,010 --> 00:11:42,744 - LA-LAVERNE, PLEASE, THIS IS A RATHER DELICATE MATTER. 208 00:11:42,779 --> 00:11:44,612 - DOCTOR, PLEASE, I ASSURE YOU, 209 00:11:44,648 --> 00:11:46,548 WHERE AFFAIRS OF THE HEART ARE CONCERNED, 210 00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:49,016 I HAVE A TENDER AND SENSITIVE NATURE. 211 00:11:49,408 --> 00:11:50,552 - WHAT ARE YOU GONNA SAY? 212 00:11:50,587 --> 00:11:52,810 - THAT I PREFER A BIG, HAIRY MEN. 213 00:11:57,027 --> 00:11:58,331 - THAT OUGHTA DO IT. 214 00:11:59,229 --> 00:12:01,123 - OH, YOU GOT THE FLOWERS. 215 00:12:01,526 --> 00:12:03,164 - YES. THANK YOU. 216 00:12:03,199 --> 00:12:04,731 UH, DORIS? 217 00:12:05,490 --> 00:12:06,983 WE NEED TO HAVE A LITTLE TALK. 218 00:12:07,022 --> 00:12:09,165 - SURE. JUST LET ME TAKE OFF MY COAT. 219 00:12:22,886 --> 00:12:24,759 - BOY, DON'T YOU LOOK... 220 00:12:25,055 --> 00:12:26,282 FAMILIAR. 221 00:12:29,025 --> 00:12:32,193 - YOU KNOW, MAYBE WE COULD HAVE THAT TALK OVER DINNER. 222 00:12:32,228 --> 00:12:34,874 I KNOW A NICE COZY LITTLE CAFE. 223 00:12:38,233 --> 00:12:39,658 - I HAVE A DATE. 224 00:12:41,336 --> 00:12:43,815 - A DATE? I SEE. 225 00:12:44,554 --> 00:12:46,172 WELL, FINE, THEN. 226 00:12:46,207 --> 00:12:47,907 DON'T WORRY ABOUT POOR LITTLE DORIS. 227 00:12:47,942 --> 00:12:49,942 POOR LITTLE DORIS CAN TAKE OF HERSELF, 228 00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:51,336 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 229 00:12:52,247 --> 00:12:53,949 ENJOY YOUR DATE. 230 00:13:02,023 --> 00:13:04,704 - YOU LEFT OUT THE BIG, HAIRY MEN PART. 231 00:13:18,516 --> 00:13:21,014 - HARRY? READY TO KICK SOME BUTT? 232 00:13:23,566 --> 00:13:26,386 - SOPHIA, WHERE WOULD THIS VASE LOOK BEST? 233 00:13:26,503 --> 00:13:27,893 - IN THE TRASH. 234 00:13:30,618 --> 00:13:32,051 - DADDY, HOW DOES EVERYTHING LOOK? 235 00:13:32,086 --> 00:13:33,519 - OH, SWEETIE, DON'T YOU THINK 236 00:13:33,555 --> 00:13:35,021 YOU'RE GOING TO AN AWFUL LOT OF TROUBLE 237 00:13:35,056 --> 00:13:36,322 FOR A PRESCHOOL INTERVIEW? 238 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:39,091 - DADDY, BRENDA PULLED A LOT OF STRINGS TO SET THIS UP, 239 00:13:39,127 --> 00:13:42,295 AND I WANT MY CHILD TO HAVE EVERY EDUCATIONAL OPPORTUNITY. 240 00:13:42,330 --> 00:13:44,263 EVERY CHANCE TO GROW, TO BLOSSOM. 241 00:13:44,299 --> 00:13:46,334 - YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. 242 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,503 LET'S WIN ONE FOR SHADY PINES. 243 00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,545 - OKAY. 244 00:13:51,585 --> 00:13:52,647 - IF ANYBODY ASKS, 245 00:13:52,678 --> 00:13:54,206 YOUR NAME IS MORRIS AND YOU'RE 85. 246 00:13:54,242 --> 00:13:55,257 - OKAY. 247 00:13:58,862 --> 00:14:00,738 [telephone rings] 248 00:14:02,293 --> 00:14:04,293 - HELLO? OH, HI. 249 00:14:04,328 --> 00:14:07,329 BRENDA. YES. HE'LL BE HERE IN ABOUT AN HOUR. 250 00:14:07,365 --> 00:14:08,898 THANKS AGAIN FOR SETTING IT UP. 251 00:14:08,933 --> 00:14:10,166 [doorbell rings] YES, 252 00:14:10,201 --> 00:14:11,367 I BOUGHT A SMASHING NEW OUTFIT 253 00:14:11,402 --> 00:14:13,002 AND I HAD MY NAILS DONE. 254 00:14:13,037 --> 00:14:15,269 I JUST HOPE I DON'T DAZZLE THE POOR FELLOW. 255 00:14:16,774 --> 00:14:18,764 - MRS. WESTON, CAROL WESTON? 256 00:14:19,176 --> 00:14:21,840 - BRENDA, I HAVE TO GO NOW. JAMES BOND IS HERE. 257 00:14:25,349 --> 00:14:28,317 - HELLO, I'M STEVEN ELLIS, THE OXFORD ACADEMY. 258 00:14:28,352 --> 00:14:29,485 I'M SORRY I'M EARLY, 259 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:30,953 BUT I'M HAVING A FUNDRAISER TONIGHT, 260 00:14:30,988 --> 00:14:32,121 AND SUDDENLY THEY NEED ME 261 00:14:32,156 --> 00:14:33,923 TO PICK UP JANET RENO AT THE AIRPORT. 262 00:14:33,958 --> 00:14:35,391 - THE ATTORNEY GENERAL? 263 00:14:35,426 --> 00:14:38,475 - TO HER FRIENDS AT OXFORD, SHE'S JUST PLAIN SLATS. 264 00:14:39,497 --> 00:14:40,629 MAY I COME IN? 265 00:14:40,665 --> 00:14:42,531 - OH, OF COURSE. WHERE ARE MY MANNERS? 266 00:14:42,567 --> 00:14:43,699 - THANK YOU. 267 00:14:43,734 --> 00:14:46,623 - PLEASE, PARDON MY--MY APPEARANCE. 268 00:14:46,759 --> 00:14:49,397 I WAS JUST--I WAS JUST... 269 00:14:50,142 --> 00:14:53,558 DOING A RESEARCH EXPERIMENT IN MICROBIOLOGY. 270 00:14:54,612 --> 00:14:55,945 - YOU'RE A MICROBIOLOGIST? 271 00:14:55,980 --> 00:14:57,576 - I DABBLE. 272 00:14:57,964 --> 00:14:59,181 WON'T YOU SIT DOWN? 273 00:14:59,217 --> 00:15:00,549 - OH, THANK YOU. 274 00:15:00,585 --> 00:15:02,685 SO, WILL YOUR HUSBAND BE JOINING US? 275 00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:04,420 - OH, MY HUSBAND. YES. 276 00:15:04,455 --> 00:15:07,556 AH. NO. HE'S OUT OF THE COUNTRY. 277 00:15:07,592 --> 00:15:09,925 HE'S--HE'S STUDYING ARTS IN PARIS. AT THE SORBONNE. 278 00:15:09,961 --> 00:15:11,427 - WELL, HOW ABOUT THAT? 279 00:15:11,462 --> 00:15:12,728 I STUDIED AT THE SORBONNE. 280 00:15:12,763 --> 00:15:15,297 - WELL, HE'S NOT AT THE SORBONNE. 281 00:15:15,333 --> 00:15:17,430 HE'S NEAR THE SORBONNE. 282 00:15:17,843 --> 00:15:20,593 JUST DOWN THE RUE FROM THE SORBONNE. 283 00:15:21,572 --> 00:15:23,806 - I WAS JUST WONDERING ABOUT YOUR FAMILY HISTORY. 284 00:15:23,841 --> 00:15:26,809 - OH, WELL. WHERE TO BEGIN? 285 00:15:26,844 --> 00:15:29,812 OUR FAMILY IS A RICH TAPESTRY. 286 00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:33,215 A TAPESTRY WOVEN OF--OF RENAISSANCE THINKERS 287 00:15:33,251 --> 00:15:35,784 AND PATRONS OF THE ARTS AND... 288 00:15:35,820 --> 00:15:37,119 - AND? 289 00:15:37,154 --> 00:15:39,288 - DID I MENTION THAT WE'RE ONE EIGHTH CHEROKEE? 290 00:15:39,323 --> 00:15:41,757 - REALLY? I THINK THE BOARD WILL BE IMMENSELY IMPRESSED 291 00:15:41,792 --> 00:15:42,925 WITH YOUR INDIAN HERITAGE. 292 00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:44,651 - MR. ELLIS. 293 00:15:45,359 --> 00:15:48,297 I HAVE TO BE HONEST WITH YOU...ABOUT THAT-- 294 00:15:48,332 --> 00:15:49,420 - YES? 295 00:15:50,976 --> 00:15:53,591 - MY PEOPLE PREFER THE TERM "NATIVE AMERICAN". 296 00:15:56,046 --> 00:15:58,126 - CAROL. I'M SHIPPING OUT. 297 00:15:58,288 --> 00:16:00,397 D'YOUR OLD MAN HAVE ANY CLEAN UNDERWEAR? 298 00:16:01,015 --> 00:16:02,538 - I-I'M SURE HE DOES, CHARLEY. 299 00:16:02,569 --> 00:16:04,359 I'LL TELL HIM YOU ASKED. - HEY. 300 00:16:05,031 --> 00:16:06,530 IS THAT JAMES BOND? 301 00:16:08,568 --> 00:16:09,591 - NO, CHARLEY. 302 00:16:09,630 --> 00:16:11,836 THIS IS MR. ELLIS, FROM THE OXFORD PRESCHOOL. 303 00:16:11,871 --> 00:16:13,325 - JUST A MINUTE. 304 00:16:13,669 --> 00:16:14,809 NAVY? 305 00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,565 - NO. WHITE. 306 00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:24,181 - [laughing] 307 00:16:26,953 --> 00:16:28,827 MILITARY HUMOR. 308 00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:31,021 ACTUALLY, CHARLEY HERE IS QUITE THE WAR HERO. 309 00:16:31,057 --> 00:16:32,723 ISN'T THAT RIGHT, CHARLEY? - HUH? 310 00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:34,227 AH! I MEAN... 311 00:16:34,627 --> 00:16:36,126 I WOULDN'T SAY HERO, 312 00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:38,901 JUST A NAVY FLYBOY DOING HIS JOB. 313 00:16:39,198 --> 00:16:40,498 MAYBE HEARD OF A LITTLE OPERATION 314 00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:41,999 CALLED DESERT STORM. 315 00:16:42,182 --> 00:16:43,496 - CERTAINLY. 316 00:16:43,603 --> 00:16:44,972 WHAT DID YOU FLY? 317 00:16:45,362 --> 00:16:46,650 - AN AIRPLANE. 318 00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,306 - [laughing] 319 00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:52,343 - [fake laughter] 320 00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:57,293 - DID I MENTION HE TOOK A SCUD MISSILE TO THE HEAD? 321 00:17:05,047 --> 00:17:08,086 - IT'S HERE! FROM THE OXFORD ACADEMY PRESCHOOL. 322 00:17:08,129 --> 00:17:09,301 - THANKS. 323 00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:11,395 - AREN'T YOU GONNA OPEN IT? 324 00:17:11,430 --> 00:17:12,663 - I ALREADY KNOW WHAT IT SAYS. 325 00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:14,765 - OH, CAROL. DON'T BE SO NEGATIVE. 326 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,433 COME ON, THEY COULD HAVE ACCEPTED YOU. 327 00:17:16,469 --> 00:17:18,502 - OF COURSE THEY ACCEPTED ME, 328 00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:20,571 BUT I CAN'T ACCEPT THEIR ACCEPTANCE. 329 00:17:25,052 --> 00:17:27,444 DADDY, I LIED TO GET IN. 330 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:29,246 - YOU LIED? THAT'S NOT LIKE YOU. 331 00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:32,216 - I KNOW, BUT WITH MR. ELLIS STANDING THERE, 332 00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:35,119 LOOKING LIKE GOD IN A TUX, TALKING ABOUT JANET RENO, 333 00:17:35,154 --> 00:17:37,124 I JUST GOT SWEPT AWAY. 334 00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:39,657 I JUST WANTED WHAT WAS BEST FOR MY BABY. 335 00:17:39,692 --> 00:17:41,158 - WELL, I MEAN, OF COURSE... 336 00:17:41,193 --> 00:17:43,326 HE KNOWS JANET RENO? 337 00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:47,131 - I MEAN, IT'S CRAZY ENROLLING OUR FETUSES IN SCHOOL. 338 00:17:47,166 --> 00:17:50,440 - YEAH, I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF CLASS PICTURE WOULD THAT BE? 339 00:17:52,939 --> 00:17:54,805 - BESIDES, MY CHILD DOES NOT NEED TO GO 340 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,373 TO SOME SNOOTY ACADEMY 341 00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,852 TO LEARN TO SHOVE PLAY-DOH UP ITS NOSE. 342 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:02,299 - SWEETIE, IF I HAD ANY QUESTIONS 343 00:18:02,334 --> 00:18:04,262 ABOUT YOU BEING READY TO BE A MOTHER, 344 00:18:04,654 --> 00:18:05,869 YOU JUST ANSWERED THEM. 345 00:18:05,905 --> 00:18:07,068 - OH, DADDY. 346 00:18:07,107 --> 00:18:08,561 YOU HAD QUESTIONS? 347 00:18:10,075 --> 00:18:11,241 - NO, NOT REALLY. 348 00:18:18,047 --> 00:18:19,983 [doorbell rings] OH, I'M UP, I'M UP, I'M UP! 349 00:18:20,019 --> 00:18:22,419 CAROL, RELAX. THIS-- 350 00:18:25,424 --> 00:18:26,546 OKAY. 351 00:18:31,230 --> 00:18:34,264 - HELLO, DR. WESTON. I'M SORRY IT'S SO LATE. DID I WAKE YOU? 352 00:18:34,300 --> 00:18:36,389 - NO, NO. I WAS JUST READING. 353 00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:40,029 - OH. IT'S JUST YOUR FACE IS ALL WAFFLY. 354 00:18:41,340 --> 00:18:42,673 - YEAH, I KNOW. IT--IT DOES THAT. 355 00:18:42,708 --> 00:18:43,921 COME ON IN. 356 00:18:44,966 --> 00:18:47,177 - I--I--I WAS GOING TO TALK TO YOU ON MONDAY, 357 00:18:47,212 --> 00:18:49,580 BUT I COULDN'T WAIT. I JUST WANT TO SAY 358 00:18:49,615 --> 00:18:51,315 I'M SORRY FOR THE WAY I ACTED THE OTHER DAY. 359 00:18:51,350 --> 00:18:52,950 - FORGET IT. 360 00:18:52,985 --> 00:18:55,752 - AND OF COURSE I'M ALSO GOING TO APOLOGIZE TO LAVERNE. 361 00:18:55,788 --> 00:18:57,454 - IT'S GOOD IDEA. - DO YOU THINK 362 00:18:57,489 --> 00:19:00,090 A WEEKEND IN THE BAHAMAS WOULD DO THE TRICK? 363 00:19:05,166 --> 00:19:08,012 - DORIS, I, UM, I THINK WE-- 364 00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:09,618 I THINK WE NEED TO TALK. 365 00:19:11,548 --> 00:19:13,036 NOW, F-F-FIRST OF ALL, 366 00:19:13,072 --> 00:19:14,605 YOU--YOU--YOU JUST TELL ME 367 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:15,839 IF THIS IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS, 368 00:19:15,874 --> 00:19:19,566 BECAUSE PROBABLY IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS. 369 00:19:20,828 --> 00:19:23,095 BUT THESE ARE THE '90s, AND SO... 370 00:19:24,398 --> 00:19:26,416 I'M JUST GONNA ASK YOU STRAIGHT OUT. 371 00:19:27,869 --> 00:19:29,545 DORIS, ARE YOU A LE-- 372 00:19:34,242 --> 00:19:35,678 LE-- 373 00:19:37,698 --> 00:19:39,658 LET ME REPHRASE THIS. 374 00:19:41,218 --> 00:19:42,800 I MEAN, IT-- 375 00:19:43,050 --> 00:19:45,520 YOU JUST MET LAVERNE, I MEAN. 376 00:19:46,093 --> 00:19:47,553 WHY THE BAHAMAS? 377 00:19:47,588 --> 00:19:51,624 - WELL, WHENEVER MY SISTER AND I WOULD HAVE A TIFF, 378 00:19:51,659 --> 00:19:53,325 WE'D TAKE A LITTLE TRIP. 379 00:19:53,361 --> 00:19:54,627 WE WERE VERY CLOSE. 380 00:19:54,662 --> 00:19:57,596 I GUESS THAT'S TRUE OF ALL IDENTICAL TWINS. 381 00:20:00,748 --> 00:20:02,205 - IDENTICAL TWINS? 382 00:20:03,738 --> 00:20:06,871 BY ANY CHANCE, DID THE TWO OF YOU USE TO DRESS ALIKE? 383 00:20:07,164 --> 00:20:08,741 - EVERY DAY. 384 00:20:08,776 --> 00:20:10,409 BUT WE COULDN'T HAVE BEEN MORE DIFFERENT. 385 00:20:10,444 --> 00:20:13,512 DONNA WAS SEXY, SASSY, FUN TO BE WITH. 386 00:20:13,888 --> 00:20:17,121 - SOUNDS LIKE LAVERNE, EXCEPT FOR THE FUN TO BE WITH. 387 00:20:18,653 --> 00:20:20,553 - WELL, I--I HADN'T THOUGHT ABOUT IT, 388 00:20:20,588 --> 00:20:22,600 BUT THEY ARE A LOT ALIKE. 389 00:20:24,025 --> 00:20:26,168 - YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK? I THINK YOU'VE BEEN-- 390 00:20:26,455 --> 00:20:28,860 I THINK YOU'VE BEEN PUTTING LAVERNE IN DONNA'S PLACE. 391 00:20:29,047 --> 00:20:30,602 - OH, I DON'T THINK I-- 392 00:20:30,865 --> 00:20:32,610 I MEAN, IT'S POSSIBLE THAT I C-- 393 00:20:34,001 --> 00:20:35,665 OH, MY. 394 00:20:36,037 --> 00:20:38,604 OH, DR. WESTON, I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT. 395 00:20:38,639 --> 00:20:40,072 I FEEL JUST AWFUL. 396 00:20:40,107 --> 00:20:42,684 - WELL, NO, NO, DON'T. DON'T, DON'T. 397 00:20:43,177 --> 00:20:44,740 THE POINT IS YOUR SISTER'S DEATH 398 00:20:44,779 --> 00:20:46,814 COULD BE A TERRIFIC BREAK FOR YOU. 399 00:20:47,082 --> 00:20:48,705 - I BEG YOUR PARDON? 400 00:20:49,817 --> 00:20:52,291 - WELL, NO, I MEAN, WH-WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS 401 00:20:52,332 --> 00:20:54,626 IS--IS THAT IT'S NOT TOO LATE FOR YOU TO-- 402 00:20:54,910 --> 00:20:57,344 YOU KNOW, TO HAVE YOUR OWN IDENTITY. 403 00:20:57,959 --> 00:20:59,092 YOU KNOW? LISTEN. 404 00:20:59,130 --> 00:21:02,202 WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THAT TRIP TO THE BAHAMAS BY YOURSELF? 405 00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:04,159 - OH, I COULDN'T. 406 00:21:04,411 --> 00:21:05,831 - YES, YOU COULD. 407 00:21:05,866 --> 00:21:08,330 COME ON. YOU'RE A VIBRANT, INTELLIGENT, ATTRACTIVE, 408 00:21:08,361 --> 00:21:09,846 LOVELY YOUNG LADY. 409 00:21:09,892 --> 00:21:11,203 - REALLY? 410 00:21:11,902 --> 00:21:14,082 WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO WITH ME? 411 00:21:24,285 --> 00:21:27,486 OH, LAVERNE. I'VE JUST CAME TO SAY GOOD-BYE. 412 00:21:27,521 --> 00:21:29,874 I'VE DECIDED TO TAKE A LITTLE VACATION. 413 00:21:30,358 --> 00:21:32,424 - WELL, I THINK THAT'S A FINE IDEA. 414 00:21:32,460 --> 00:21:35,227 - DR. WESTON AND I HAD A GOOD TALK LAST NIGHT, 415 00:21:35,262 --> 00:21:37,563 AND HE CLEARED UP A FEW THINGS. 416 00:21:37,598 --> 00:21:39,940 - WELL, I'M SURE GLAD TO HEAR THAT. 417 00:21:41,602 --> 00:21:44,203 - AND NOW I WANT TO APOLOGIZE. 418 00:21:44,238 --> 00:21:45,707 - OH, FOR WHAT? 419 00:21:45,801 --> 00:21:48,107 LISTEN, JUST 'CAUSE I'M FROM A SMALL TOWN 420 00:21:48,142 --> 00:21:50,170 DON'T MEAN I AIN'T BEEN AROUND THE BLOCK. 421 00:21:50,228 --> 00:21:52,711 SOME PEOPLE MARCH TO THE BEAT OF A DIFFERENT DRUMMER. 422 00:21:52,747 --> 00:21:55,147 IN FACT, I PRIDE MYSELF ON BEIN' DIFFERENT. 423 00:21:55,182 --> 00:21:56,915 - REALLY? - SURE. 424 00:21:56,951 --> 00:21:59,284 I THINK SEXUAL PREFERENCE 425 00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:01,940 IS A MATTER OF PERSONAL CHOICE, DORIS. 426 00:22:02,047 --> 00:22:04,256 I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TRYIN' TO SAY. 427 00:22:04,291 --> 00:22:05,947 - I CERTAINLY DO. 428 00:22:06,133 --> 00:22:08,550 YOU'RE A LESBIAN, AND NO, THANKS. 429 00:22:20,229 --> 00:22:21,835 - HARRY, LOOK. 430 00:22:21,886 --> 00:22:23,589 IT CAME BACK FROM THE ENGRAVERS. 431 00:22:23,620 --> 00:22:26,654 - OH! WHY, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL. 432 00:22:26,690 --> 00:22:28,489 THAT'S GREAT, SOPHIA. 433 00:22:28,525 --> 00:22:31,459 I--I NEVER WON AN AWARD BEFORE. 434 00:22:31,494 --> 00:22:33,194 - WE'RE IMMORTAL. OUR NAMES WILL LIVE FOREVER 435 00:22:33,229 --> 00:22:35,557 IN THE TROPHY CASE AT SHADY PINES. 436 00:22:36,566 --> 00:22:38,299 - LOOK AT THIS. THIS IS GREAT. 437 00:22:38,335 --> 00:22:41,301 "FIRST PLACE. EXTREMELY OLD DIVISION" 438 00:22:45,709 --> 00:22:47,408 "SOPHIA PETRILLO AND... 439 00:22:47,444 --> 00:22:49,167 MORRIS LEVINE" 440 00:22:51,182 --> 00:22:53,571 I'M SO PROUD. [chuckles] 441 00:22:53,621 --> 00:22:58,171 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 31643

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