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1
00:00:04,203 --> 00:00:05,975
Man: Here's your change. Thank you.
2
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,166
Next.
3
00:00:07,251 --> 00:00:09,779
Yes. Can I get, uh...
4
00:00:09,804 --> 00:00:10,837
Chip?
5
00:00:10,888 --> 00:00:12,972
Can I get an Americano, please?
6
00:00:13,007 --> 00:00:14,473
Americano?
7
00:00:14,508 --> 00:00:16,842
It's a European thing... Americano.
8
00:00:16,894 --> 00:00:18,237
Chip, can we talk?
9
00:00:18,262 --> 00:00:19,710
Martha, you're embarrassing me
10
00:00:19,735 --> 00:00:20,896
in front of the barista.
11
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I'll just have a hotdog.
12
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One hotdog.
13
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Synced and corrected by Nest0r
www.addic7ed.com
14
00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:30,877
So, Chip, we have a really important
thing we need to talk about.
15
00:00:30,902 --> 00:00:34,790
First things first, okay? I'm no
longer Renoir, I'm Baskets the clown.
16
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:37,161
Okay, when were you Renoir?
17
00:00:37,576 --> 00:00:38,748
What do you mean, when was I Renoir?
18
00:00:38,773 --> 00:00:40,282
I've always been Renoir. Now I'm Baskets.
19
00:00:40,787 --> 00:00:42,703
- Okay.
- Another thing is that
20
00:00:42,789 --> 00:00:45,172
I think I can, you know, work on my brand,
21
00:00:45,197 --> 00:00:48,209
so I want to take an ad
out in the Yellow Pages,
22
00:00:48,315 --> 00:00:49,853
but I want it to stand out.
23
00:00:49,878 --> 00:00:51,712
That's why I want it to be
in the White Pages.
24
00:00:51,798 --> 00:00:52,889
You're not going to write this down?
25
00:00:52,914 --> 00:00:54,835
Sorry. Um...
26
00:00:54,860 --> 00:00:58,385
Yellow page in the White Pages.
27
00:00:58,471 --> 00:00:59,520
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
28
00:00:59,605 --> 00:01:01,504
Okay. So, um, Chip,
29
00:01:01,529 --> 00:01:03,550
we need to talk about a sensitive matter.
30
00:01:03,575 --> 00:01:04,253
Martha,
31
00:01:04,318 --> 00:01:05,254
Ummm...
32
00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:06,944
if you start crying, I'm
going to walk out of here
33
00:01:06,979 --> 00:01:08,430
and I'm going to take your car with me.
34
00:01:08,455 --> 00:01:10,418
Okay, Chip, it's your scooter.
35
00:01:10,461 --> 00:01:12,173
It can't be fixed.
36
00:01:12,198 --> 00:01:13,288
What?
37
00:01:15,305 --> 00:01:17,171
- [Sigh]
- I'm sorry.
38
00:01:17,257 --> 00:01:19,173
Have you tried to repair it?
39
00:01:19,259 --> 00:01:21,526
Uh, yes and no, but, um,
40
00:01:21,551 --> 00:01:25,120
the good news is, uh, it was insured,
41
00:01:25,145 --> 00:01:27,398
and so it's not a lot,
42
00:01:27,434 --> 00:01:30,768
but here's a check for $900.
43
00:01:32,635 --> 00:01:34,768
That's not bad, Martha, $900.
44
00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:36,828
I was thinking about firing you,
45
00:01:36,853 --> 00:01:38,472
but now I'm not sure what to do.
46
00:01:38,497 --> 00:01:40,475
Oh. I wasn't sure if I work for you
47
00:01:40,497 --> 00:01:42,797
or if maybe we were just friends.
48
00:01:45,347 --> 00:01:46,680
TBD, Martha.
49
00:01:46,705 --> 00:01:50,672
Martha: This $900 could be
really good for you, Chip.
50
00:01:50,697 --> 00:01:53,871
You could give your mom
some money for living with her.
51
00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:55,863
Martha, if you're only going
to have boring suggestions,
52
00:01:55,948 --> 00:01:57,334
I'd rather talk about something else.
53
00:01:57,359 --> 00:01:58,359
Okay.
54
00:02:00,219 --> 00:02:02,355
Um, I found this stray dog
55
00:02:02,380 --> 00:02:04,163
in my yard this weekend.
56
00:02:04,430 --> 00:02:06,463
I took him in, and I named him Boots.
57
00:02:06,826 --> 00:02:07,826
[Phone rings]
58
00:02:07,877 --> 00:02:10,327
Thank god. Saved by the bell.
59
00:02:10,379 --> 00:02:11,211
Hello.
60
00:02:11,297 --> 00:02:13,080
Hi, Martha. Is Chip with you?
61
00:02:13,165 --> 00:02:15,750
Yeah. Hold on. It's your mom.
62
00:02:15,775 --> 00:02:16,957
Chip?
63
00:02:16,982 --> 00:02:17,982
[Sigh]
64
00:02:18,671 --> 00:02:19,415
Yes, mother?
65
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:20,885
Chip, are you going to be around at noon?
66
00:02:20,910 --> 00:02:23,006
I'd like you to meet the neighbors.
67
00:02:23,092 --> 00:02:25,288
Mom, the neighbors...
I really... I don't care.
68
00:02:25,313 --> 00:02:27,085
Their son's going to be with them.
69
00:02:27,110 --> 00:02:28,520
He's an astronaut.
70
00:02:28,545 --> 00:02:30,147
He's in line to go to space
71
00:02:30,182 --> 00:02:32,369
if NASA ever gets off their rear end.
72
00:02:32,394 --> 00:02:33,978
Well, good for him. I'm in...
73
00:02:34,019 --> 00:02:35,185
You know, I'm 20th in line
74
00:02:35,237 --> 00:02:37,483
to get a [Bleep] corn dog tomorrow.
75
00:02:37,568 --> 00:02:39,003
Hey, did you ever think of this?
76
00:02:39,028 --> 00:02:41,278
First clown in space, Chip?
77
00:02:42,111 --> 00:02:43,832
That's actually kind of interesting.
78
00:02:43,857 --> 00:02:45,508
You in space juggling.
79
00:02:45,533 --> 00:02:47,433
You wouldn't even have to juggle.
80
00:02:47,457 --> 00:02:49,457
Oh! That would be funny too!
81
00:02:49,482 --> 00:02:54,159
Oh... I miss the Regans, they love to got to space.
82
00:02:54,184 --> 00:02:56,123
We'd be on Mars right now,
83
00:02:56,208 --> 00:02:59,176
living, if Ron and Nancy were still in.
84
00:02:59,211 --> 00:03:01,148
- Chip?
- Mom, I'm busy, all right?
85
00:03:01,173 --> 00:03:03,633
Well, I'm sorry you can't
meet the astronaut.
86
00:03:03,658 --> 00:03:05,902
I think you would have really liked him.
87
00:03:05,927 --> 00:03:07,184
Okay. Thank you.
88
00:03:07,219 --> 00:03:09,528
Bye-bye. Just pull
into here, right up there.
89
00:03:09,553 --> 00:03:10,274
Okay.
90
00:03:11,223 --> 00:03:14,191
Hey, isn't this your wife's place?
91
00:03:14,226 --> 00:03:16,737
Martha, jealousy does
not look good on you.
92
00:03:16,762 --> 00:03:18,392
Nor does that dress.
93
00:03:18,417 --> 00:03:19,813
Thanks for the check.
94
00:03:19,899 --> 00:03:21,481
Here.
95
00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:25,285
[Ringing]
96
00:03:29,351 --> 00:03:30,351
Can I help you?
97
00:03:32,711 --> 00:03:33,877
Uh... Yes.
98
00:03:33,913 --> 00:03:35,497
Penelope lives here, right?
99
00:03:35,522 --> 00:03:36,370
Yeah. She's in the shower.
100
00:03:37,850 --> 00:03:39,237
Okay. Can you tell her
101
00:03:39,262 --> 00:03:39,897
that her husband is here?
102
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:41,369
Yeah, sure.
103
00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:42,720
- Babe!
- Huh?
104
00:03:42,877 --> 00:03:44,048
Your husband's here.
105
00:03:44,073 --> 00:03:45,536
Tell him I'm naked. I can't come out.
106
00:03:45,561 --> 00:03:47,011
She can't come out because she's naked.
107
00:03:47,047 --> 00:03:48,046
Yeah, I've seen that before.
108
00:03:48,098 --> 00:03:50,631
Yeah. Yeah.
109
00:03:52,052 --> 00:03:53,651
Uh, I'm sorry. Who are you?
110
00:03:53,676 --> 00:03:54,842
- I'm Ben.
- Ben.
111
00:03:54,928 --> 00:03:56,594
- Want a nectarine?
- No, I'm good.
112
00:03:56,679 --> 00:03:57,812
Can you just let her know
113
00:03:57,847 --> 00:04:00,565
that I've recently come
into money... $900...
114
00:04:00,650 --> 00:04:02,102
And I'd like to take her to dinner,
115
00:04:02,127 --> 00:04:03,734
maybe get some appetizers, some champagne?
116
00:04:03,820 --> 00:04:06,182
You know what, Ben? I can tell her.
117
00:04:06,207 --> 00:04:07,439
No. I got it.
118
00:04:07,524 --> 00:04:09,357
Okay. Thanks, Ben.
119
00:04:09,409 --> 00:04:11,359
Hi, sweetie pie.
120
00:04:11,444 --> 00:04:14,162
[Whispered chatter]
121
00:04:16,104 --> 00:04:17,832
I'm sorry, man. She said no.
122
00:04:17,867 --> 00:04:19,700
We're going to stay in tonight
and watch Jumanji.
123
00:04:19,786 --> 00:04:20,955
Jumanji. I don't like that movie.
124
00:04:20,980 --> 00:04:21,980
The animals don't talk.
125
00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:23,503
It's going to be awesome.
126
00:04:23,556 --> 00:04:25,256
I got her this new flat screen.
127
00:04:25,508 --> 00:04:26,697
The old TV she had in here
128
00:04:26,722 --> 00:04:28,308
was a real tub of shit, man.
129
00:04:28,343 --> 00:04:29,425
Had to go HD.
130
00:04:29,511 --> 00:04:31,344
That's a nice television.
What size is that?
131
00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:34,063
32 inches.
132
00:04:35,016 --> 00:04:37,400
Hi. I need a 33-inch TV, please.
133
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,602
Uh, next size up is 37.
134
00:04:39,687 --> 00:04:41,604
Is it for specific space?
135
00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:43,034
It's to impress a woman.
136
00:04:43,059 --> 00:04:44,692
Oh. [Chuckling]
137
00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:48,744
Not... not that woman. A woman.
138
00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:50,836
- Chip.
- Yes.
139
00:04:50,861 --> 00:04:52,165
These TVs are super expensive.
140
00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:54,700
Maybe you should just put
your money in a savings account.
141
00:04:54,752 --> 00:04:56,301
Would you hold on one second?
142
00:04:56,326 --> 00:04:57,670
Or, like, buy a nice blender.
143
00:04:57,705 --> 00:04:59,533
Smoothies are in right now.
144
00:04:59,561 --> 00:05:02,458
Oh, what a great idea. Do
you sell 33-inch blenders?
145
00:05:02,544 --> 00:05:08,544
No. Ha ha. We sell all the TVs.
Uh.. 3D TVs, smart TVs.
146
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:10,568
- How smart ?
- They are very smart !
147
00:05:10,593 --> 00:05:12,685
They got, uh, Nex... Nex...
148
00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:15,638
Uh, Net... Net... Netflix and Crackle.
149
00:05:15,723 --> 00:05:17,057
Crackle. Huh.
150
00:05:17,082 --> 00:05:20,560
But if you want to really
impress someone with TV,
151
00:05:20,645 --> 00:05:23,154
there is really just one option.
152
00:05:23,179 --> 00:05:24,261
What's that?
153
00:05:24,286 --> 00:05:28,609
4k. It has four times picture quality.
154
00:05:28,634 --> 00:05:32,405
It makes hi def TV look like, uh...
155
00:05:35,677 --> 00:05:36,909
Like it had shit for brains?
156
00:05:36,995 --> 00:05:39,629
- Exactly.
- What movie is this?
157
00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:41,080
This is demo disc.
158
00:05:41,132 --> 00:05:44,083
But in two years, everything
will be in this format.
159
00:05:44,168 --> 00:05:48,621
What size TV can I get for around $900?
160
00:05:49,050 --> 00:05:50,950
32 inches.
161
00:05:51,010 --> 00:05:52,559
Sold.
162
00:05:56,397 --> 00:05:59,796
So is this what you
call an impulse purchase?
163
00:05:59,821 --> 00:06:01,605
I think so.
164
00:06:03,687 --> 00:06:08,063
Well, Boots is turning out
to be quite the handful,
165
00:06:08,088 --> 00:06:10,526
although my fish Samantha likes him.
166
00:06:10,611 --> 00:06:14,613
She's had kind of a spring in
her step since he showed up.
167
00:06:15,165 --> 00:06:16,198
Are you talking to me?
168
00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:18,247
Yeah. I was trying to tell you
169
00:06:18,285 --> 00:06:19,739
about this stray dog I found.
170
00:06:19,764 --> 00:06:21,031
It's been kind of an ordeal.
171
00:06:21,056 --> 00:06:23,063
I thought you were on your cell phone.
172
00:06:23,088 --> 00:06:25,207
- [Sigh]
- You know,
173
00:06:25,259 --> 00:06:27,200
I'm not trying to be mean.
174
00:06:27,225 --> 00:06:30,045
I'm sure your wife has a lot
of really nice qualities,
175
00:06:30,130 --> 00:06:31,482
but it kind of seems like
176
00:06:31,507 --> 00:06:34,821
you're throwing good money after bad here.
177
00:06:34,846 --> 00:06:36,846
What does that mean, Martha?
178
00:06:36,932 --> 00:06:38,565
I don't know. They just...
179
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:39,796
They say it on CNBC
180
00:06:39,821 --> 00:06:41,401
on the financial investment shows,
181
00:06:41,436 --> 00:06:44,565
usually when someone's flushing
money down the toilet.
182
00:06:44,590 --> 00:06:49,011
Martha, my wife is the best thing
that ever happened to me.
183
00:06:49,036 --> 00:06:53,840
And I know it may not seem perfect
from your... fairytale world view.
184
00:06:53,865 --> 00:06:55,115
With Samantha and Boots
185
00:06:55,167 --> 00:06:57,700
and your magic stuffed donkeys, but...
186
00:06:57,786 --> 00:06:59,119
[sigh]...
187
00:06:59,171 --> 00:07:02,455
I'll take happiness where I can get it.
188
00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:10,013
Chip, look, I'm sorry. I...
189
00:07:10,098 --> 00:07:11,848
Thanks. That'll do for today.
190
00:07:11,933 --> 00:07:15,101
Are you sure? I could help
set up your wife's TV.
191
00:07:15,137 --> 00:07:18,597
Don't forget about that, uh,
ad in the Yellow Pages.
192
00:07:18,622 --> 00:07:19,973
All right. I'm on it.
193
00:07:20,025 --> 00:07:22,308
Thank you, Yellow Pages.
194
00:07:27,489 --> 00:07:30,440
Hey, Chips, look. I found
this in a drugstore.
195
00:07:30,465 --> 00:07:33,527
You want it? You know, it's a bit ugly,
196
00:07:33,552 --> 00:07:34,738
but maybe you'll like it.
197
00:07:34,763 --> 00:07:36,526
It looks good with your beard.
198
00:07:36,551 --> 00:07:37,683
Oh, I like that a lot.
199
00:07:37,719 --> 00:07:39,552
- Huh?
- I do, yeah.
200
00:07:39,817 --> 00:07:40,817
What are you doing here?
201
00:07:40,902 --> 00:07:43,486
Oh, uh, look at this.
202
00:07:44,574 --> 00:07:46,073
Voil?.
203
00:07:49,744 --> 00:07:51,877
It's the same TV.
204
00:07:51,913 --> 00:07:54,361
No, no. This is 4k.
205
00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:56,471
- It has, like, uh...
- What it mean?
206
00:07:56,496 --> 00:08:00,229
4k. It's like, uh, ram coaxial splits,
207
00:08:00,254 --> 00:08:02,972
- and, uh, it's got...
- Much higher definition.
208
00:08:03,057 --> 00:08:04,924
- Yeah, it's got...
- Dude, 4k.
209
00:08:04,976 --> 00:08:06,842
Awesome. Good choice.
210
00:08:06,928 --> 00:08:08,594
Thanks.
211
00:08:09,722 --> 00:08:10,980
- So you're still here.
- Yep.
212
00:08:11,005 --> 00:08:12,599
I'm in town until harvest.
213
00:08:12,683 --> 00:08:13,599
Oh, you're a farmer.
214
00:08:13,684 --> 00:08:15,901
- What do you farm, dirt?
- No, no.
215
00:08:15,937 --> 00:08:18,299
We do almonds, apricots, beans, cabbage,
216
00:08:18,324 --> 00:08:20,276
cantaloupe, carrots, citrus,
cotton, and plant seed...
217
00:08:20,324 --> 00:08:22,274
- Gross.
- Grapes, hay, honeydew...
218
00:08:22,326 --> 00:08:24,143
- Uh-huh.
- Lettuce, nectarines...
219
00:08:24,168 --> 00:08:25,111
I got more nectarines.
You want a nectarine?
220
00:08:25,196 --> 00:08:26,912
- I'm okay.
- Peaches, plums,
221
00:08:26,948 --> 00:08:28,166
rose plants, and watermelon.
222
00:08:28,191 --> 00:08:29,580
- Honest work.
- Oh, that sounds gross.
223
00:08:29,605 --> 00:08:30,866
I really want to get you a nectarine.
224
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:32,027
No, I don't want a nectarine.
225
00:08:32,052 --> 00:08:33,777
Nectarine are good for the hair.
226
00:08:33,802 --> 00:08:35,052
Who gives a shit?
227
00:08:35,256 --> 00:08:36,956
You want a hand with that TV?
228
00:08:37,041 --> 00:08:38,041
No, I'll just, uh...
229
00:08:38,126 --> 00:08:40,730
I'll just figure this out.
230
00:08:40,755 --> 00:08:43,045
Okay. "Setup Wizard."
231
00:08:43,131 --> 00:08:44,296
So we just, uh...
232
00:08:44,348 --> 00:08:46,799
Are you sure? I'm really
good at setting these up.
233
00:08:46,851 --> 00:08:48,100
These are wonderful TVs man.
234
00:08:48,136 --> 00:08:49,802
No, I'm... I'm okay.
235
00:08:49,887 --> 00:08:51,137
You stick to peanut farming.
236
00:08:51,189 --> 00:08:53,722
Penelope, you going to want
any gaming at all?
237
00:08:53,808 --> 00:08:54,808
[Laughing]
238
00:08:55,860 --> 00:08:57,693
[Whispering]
239
00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:03,655
So he was abandoned,
I think maybe mistreated.
240
00:09:03,678 --> 00:09:06,621
He bit me last night, but it's not serious
241
00:09:06,646 --> 00:09:08,331
Well if it's too much
troubles, there is not shame
242
00:09:08,356 --> 00:09:09,955
in taking it to a shelter.
243
00:09:09,991 --> 00:09:11,157
Oh, my god.
244
00:09:11,242 --> 00:09:13,993
Uh, I'm not taking him to a shelter.
245
00:09:14,078 --> 00:09:17,793
Uh, I'm supposed to help
him turn his life around.
246
00:09:17,818 --> 00:09:20,355
If I don't, he's probably going to end up
247
00:09:20,380 --> 00:09:22,168
thinking all people are bad
248
00:09:22,253 --> 00:09:26,972
and very likely could end
up eating somebody's baby.
249
00:09:27,008 --> 00:09:28,008
Uh-huh.
250
00:09:28,075 --> 00:09:29,275
And he would be right to do it
251
00:09:29,310 --> 00:09:31,927
because people have
turned their back on him.
252
00:09:32,013 --> 00:09:35,397
Okay, uh, ahem. There's a shelter
253
00:09:35,422 --> 00:09:38,017
about ten minutes north of here on the 58.
254
00:09:38,102 --> 00:09:39,102
Here's a pamphlet.
255
00:09:39,187 --> 00:09:41,687
All right, well, thanks.
256
00:09:45,557 --> 00:09:46,557
No.
257
00:09:49,163 --> 00:09:51,090
Beautiful.
258
00:09:51,115 --> 00:09:52,164
- Yeah.
- Amazing.
259
00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:54,250
It's, uh, ultra HD.
260
00:09:54,275 --> 00:09:57,203
It's so much better than your regular HD.
261
00:09:57,288 --> 00:09:58,370
Oh, this is my favorite part right here.
262
00:09:58,422 --> 00:09:59,922
- Look at that.
- [Penelope gasps]
263
00:10:00,007 --> 00:10:01,373
Look at that bee.
264
00:10:01,425 --> 00:10:03,091
That bee hit the sunflower like it...
265
00:10:03,116 --> 00:10:04,815
You shouldn't have, Chips.
266
00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:06,095
It's too much, you know?
267
00:10:06,180 --> 00:10:07,379
I cannot even accept it.
268
00:10:07,465 --> 00:10:08,714
Don't worry about it. It's fine.
269
00:10:08,799 --> 00:10:12,384
It came from an insurance
check, so no big deal.
270
00:10:12,436 --> 00:10:14,436
This is really dynamic stuff.
271
00:10:14,522 --> 00:10:16,305
See, that's full HD on the left,
272
00:10:16,390 --> 00:10:19,391
and then there's ultra
HD that's got 2160p.
273
00:10:19,477 --> 00:10:20,877
- Oh.
- Ben: Whew.
274
00:10:20,902 --> 00:10:22,993
We can watch Jumanji in 4k?
275
00:10:23,018 --> 00:10:26,365
Uh, well, right now you can
only watch the demo disc in 4k
276
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:30,252
because the 4k technology's not
out for a couple of years.
277
00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:31,579
Okay.
278
00:10:32,886 --> 00:10:34,018
Hmm.
279
00:10:34,203 --> 00:10:35,418
Well, it's getting late.
280
00:10:35,443 --> 00:10:38,471
Uh, Ben, maybe you can
give me a ride home,
281
00:10:38,495 --> 00:10:39,578
if you're heading out.
282
00:10:39,663 --> 00:10:41,279
No, I think I'm staying here.
283
00:10:41,364 --> 00:10:42,364
Ohh.
284
00:10:44,367 --> 00:10:46,367
Okay. Just, uh...
285
00:10:48,504 --> 00:10:50,423
Ciao, Chips. Thank you.
286
00:10:50,448 --> 00:10:52,206
Hey, you want a nectarine for the road?
287
00:10:53,376 --> 00:10:54,376
[Tapping]
288
00:10:57,964 --> 00:11:00,598
Hey, man, you slashing my tires?
289
00:11:00,683 --> 00:11:03,368
I'm trying to. Either I got a bum nail,
290
00:11:03,393 --> 00:11:05,720
or these are really upstanding radials.
291
00:11:05,772 --> 00:11:09,579
You're just kind of a grumpy
little guy, aren't you?
292
00:11:09,604 --> 00:11:11,642
At least I didn't try to steal my wife!
293
00:11:11,728 --> 00:11:14,528
All right. You win.
294
00:11:14,564 --> 00:11:16,480
Here.
295
00:11:16,566 --> 00:11:24,566
Good night.
296
00:11:26,542 --> 00:11:28,325
[Dog yapping]
297
00:11:29,662 --> 00:11:31,662
Oh, my god.
298
00:11:31,748 --> 00:11:35,002
Boots, what did you do?
299
00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:38,469
Oh, my god, what happened?
300
00:11:38,554 --> 00:11:40,004
Oh, my lamp.
301
00:11:40,089 --> 00:11:41,969
- You know what? I'm sorry.
- [Barking, howling]
302
00:11:42,008 --> 00:11:43,808
I'm sorry I yelled at you.
303
00:11:43,893 --> 00:11:47,011
I'm not mad. You don't need this.
304
00:11:47,096 --> 00:11:49,897
Okay. Look, just come out, Boots.
305
00:11:49,932 --> 00:11:51,932
- I'm not mad. I promise.
- [Howling]
306
00:11:52,018 --> 00:11:54,486
If you come out, it's... it's totally...
307
00:11:54,511 --> 00:11:57,688
- Oh, my god. Samantha?
- [Barking]
308
00:11:57,774 --> 00:11:58,739
- What...
- [Phone rings]
309
00:11:58,775 --> 00:12:00,441
Samantha?
310
00:12:00,493 --> 00:12:01,493
[Ring]
311
00:12:02,779 --> 00:12:04,445
- [Ring]
- Oh, god.
312
00:12:04,530 --> 00:12:06,247
Hello.
313
00:12:13,790 --> 00:12:14,755
[Woman on phone]
314
00:12:14,791 --> 00:12:16,056
Hi, Mrs. Lewis. What...
315
00:12:16,125 --> 00:12:16,924
- Your dog...
- [Barking]
316
00:12:16,993 --> 00:12:18,986
Ooh. Yeah, I can hear it.
317
00:12:19,011 --> 00:12:20,322
I'm really sorry.
318
00:12:20,347 --> 00:12:22,847
Oh, god. Okay. I'll be right home.
319
00:12:22,932 --> 00:12:24,131
Thank you.
320
00:12:24,183 --> 00:12:26,884
Uh, we got to make a quick
stop at my place.
321
00:12:26,969 --> 00:12:29,347
Boots is barking up a storm.
322
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,189
My wife is cheating on me.
323
00:12:32,275 --> 00:12:36,727
Uhh. That's a bummer. I'm sorry, Chip.
324
00:12:36,813 --> 00:12:38,646
[Scoff]
325
00:12:38,731 --> 00:12:41,615
Sorry about your... your fish.
326
00:12:41,651 --> 00:12:42,949
Thanks.
327
00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:54,203
You know what? You can just
wait here for a minute.
328
00:12:54,239 --> 00:12:55,928
This might be kind of tricky.
329
00:12:55,953 --> 00:12:56,953
Okay.
330
00:12:58,460 --> 00:13:01,327
- [Barking]
- Oh, my god. Boots?
331
00:13:01,436 --> 00:13:04,241
- [Barking] - Boots, you
have to stop barking,
332
00:13:04,266 --> 00:13:06,466
and you have to stop doing this.
333
00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,334
You're getting me in trouble.
334
00:13:08,420 --> 00:13:10,253
- [Barking]
- Boots.
335
00:13:10,305 --> 00:13:11,588
Oh, my god.
336
00:13:11,673 --> 00:13:14,507
Uh, I'm sorry. I didn't
want you to see this.
337
00:13:14,532 --> 00:13:16,892
- I'm sorry about the mess.
- [Howling]
338
00:13:16,917 --> 00:13:18,928
What mental disease is this?
339
00:13:18,980 --> 00:13:20,296
No, it's this dog.
340
00:13:20,365 --> 00:13:22,148
He's just kind of a handful.
341
00:13:22,233 --> 00:13:24,267
[Howling]
342
00:13:24,319 --> 00:13:27,437
I think that he knows
he did something wrong,
343
00:13:27,522 --> 00:13:29,522
and I'm kind of afraid to confront him
344
00:13:29,608 --> 00:13:31,293
because we're both kind of upset.
345
00:13:32,129 --> 00:13:34,527
Do you want me to try to go calm him down?
346
00:13:34,613 --> 00:13:37,080
- [Barking]
- Uh, okay.
347
00:13:37,115 --> 00:13:38,035
[Howling]
348
00:13:38,060 --> 00:13:39,109
Yeah.
349
00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:39,754
Yeah?
350
00:13:39,779 --> 00:13:42,707
Just maybe... just,
like, protect your face.
351
00:13:43,338 --> 00:13:46,089
[Snarling, howling]
352
00:13:46,124 --> 00:13:47,340
Martha, that's a coyote.
353
00:13:47,425 --> 00:13:49,959
- What?
- Yeah. It's a coyote.
354
00:13:50,045 --> 00:13:50,722
[Howling]
355
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:53,871
Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
356
00:13:53,896 --> 00:13:55,431
Uch. Are you sure?
357
00:13:55,467 --> 00:13:57,266
- Yes!
- [Barking]
358
00:13:57,302 --> 00:13:58,542
I know coyotes when I see them.
359
00:13:58,603 --> 00:14:01,496
You know he was in my yard,
360
00:14:01,521 --> 00:14:03,066
and he looked lost.
361
00:14:03,091 --> 00:14:04,019
Yeah, of course he's lost.
362
00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:06,613
He's a wild animal. He was born lost.
363
00:14:06,668 --> 00:14:07,834
So are mosquitoes.
364
00:14:07,886 --> 00:14:09,440
You don't go around rescuing them.
365
00:14:09,465 --> 00:14:11,004
- [Howling]
- God, Martha,
366
00:14:11,056 --> 00:14:13,440
have you never seen National Geographic?
367
00:14:13,465 --> 00:14:16,059
They profile every animal on the planet,
368
00:14:16,144 --> 00:14:18,845
- from aardvarks to zebroids.
- [Howling]
369
00:14:18,897 --> 00:14:20,013
What are you thinking?
370
00:14:20,038 --> 00:14:23,683
God. Your house is a pigsty.
371
00:14:23,768 --> 00:14:25,518
And you're roommates with a coyote.
372
00:14:25,570 --> 00:14:27,002
It's a coyote sty.
373
00:14:27,027 --> 00:14:29,965
- [Howling]
- God, get your life in order.
374
00:14:32,775 --> 00:14:33,775
[Barking]
375
00:14:35,535 --> 00:14:38,565
[Howling]
376
00:14:47,198 --> 00:14:48,863
Hey
377
00:14:48,887 --> 00:14:50,887
I know what to do.
378
00:14:52,814 --> 00:14:54,464
[Howling]
379
00:15:12,901 --> 00:15:14,200
Okay.
380
00:15:14,236 --> 00:15:16,828
Okay. Um, I'm going to stay in the car,
381
00:15:16,853 --> 00:15:18,071
if you don't mind.
382
00:15:18,156 --> 00:15:20,740
I hate goodbyes even more than hellos.
383
00:15:20,825 --> 00:15:22,408
Yeah, sure.
384
00:15:33,755 --> 00:15:34,921
Go.
385
00:15:35,006 --> 00:15:36,756
[Whistle] Get out.
386
00:15:40,514 --> 00:15:41,596
Skedoodle!
387
00:15:41,813 --> 00:15:44,180
[Whistle] Get out! Hyah!
388
00:15:44,266 --> 00:15:47,600
- Boots, I'm sorry.
- Go on, get.
389
00:15:49,321 --> 00:15:51,738
You don't want to leave, do you?
390
00:15:53,275 --> 00:15:55,108
You don't get it, do you?
391
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:57,610
You don't get it.
392
00:15:59,164 --> 00:16:01,447
You're just an idiot coyote.
393
00:16:05,287 --> 00:16:07,086
You want to stay? You want to...
394
00:16:07,122 --> 00:16:09,539
Do you want to stay with Martha?
395
00:16:12,187 --> 00:16:15,878
Come on. This is not supposed to be.
396
00:16:15,964 --> 00:16:17,797
Coyotes and...
397
00:16:20,268 --> 00:16:23,136
Insurance adjusters. It's not a good mix.
398
00:16:23,188 --> 00:16:25,221
Never has been a good mix.
399
00:16:25,307 --> 00:16:27,857
You're a coyote. This is a lady.
400
00:16:27,942 --> 00:16:29,609
She's looking for a dog.
401
00:16:30,979 --> 00:16:33,123
I'm a clown. I love a lady.
402
00:16:33,148 --> 00:16:35,565
She's looking for a farm boy!
403
00:16:38,236 --> 00:16:40,728
But you belong out there,
404
00:16:40,753 --> 00:16:43,156
and I'm stuck in this world.
405
00:16:43,241 --> 00:16:45,185
You go out there, and you chase vermin
406
00:16:45,210 --> 00:16:48,244
and chase mice into the...
Into the dirt, into the sand
407
00:16:48,330 --> 00:16:50,830
because that's where you belong.
408
00:16:51,666 --> 00:16:55,999
Trust me, it feels good
to know where you belong
409
00:16:56,024 --> 00:16:57,420
because if you don't know where you belong,
410
00:16:57,505 --> 00:16:59,255
then you're on the side of the road
411
00:16:59,341 --> 00:17:01,507
having a conversation with a coyote!
412
00:17:01,593 --> 00:17:09,593
- [Growling]
- Go. Go. Martha, go.
413
00:17:10,185 --> 00:17:11,934
[Howling]
414
00:17:21,898 --> 00:17:24,565
Well, you really have a way with animals.
415
00:17:25,985 --> 00:17:27,608
You have a way with animals.
416
00:17:27,679 --> 00:17:29,545
What does that mean?
417
00:17:29,597 --> 00:17:31,255
Your way with animals
418
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:32,819
is not having a way with animals.
419
00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:33,844
Oh.
420
00:17:35,530 --> 00:17:36,552
Mm-hmm. Well, look,
421
00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:37,853
for real, though,
422
00:17:37,889 --> 00:17:39,929
thank you for helping.
423
00:17:40,054 --> 00:17:41,520
And...
424
00:17:41,893 --> 00:17:44,640
If there's anything I can do to help you,
425
00:17:44,665 --> 00:17:47,647
like, with your wife or...
426
00:17:47,732 --> 00:17:49,561
You know, I could, um,
427
00:17:49,586 --> 00:17:51,734
ambush that guy she's sleeping with,
428
00:17:51,819 --> 00:17:53,819
get... get him out of the picture.
429
00:17:53,905 --> 00:17:58,522
You know, so anything
that's kind of within the law
430
00:17:58,547 --> 00:18:00,576
I'd be happy to do.
431
00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:04,330
No, thanks. I got this.
432
00:18:05,216 --> 00:18:07,717
Just work on that yellow
pages thing, okay?
433
00:18:07,752 --> 00:18:09,168
Okay.
434
00:18:09,254 --> 00:18:12,021
Announcer: And now,
before we start the rodeo,
435
00:18:12,090 --> 00:18:14,006
please join us in the lord's prayer
436
00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:16,142
brought to you by bank of America.
437
00:18:16,227 --> 00:18:19,979
Bank of America: Too big to fail.
438
00:18:20,064 --> 00:18:22,765
Our father, who art in heaven,
439
00:18:22,817 --> 00:18:23,933
hallowed be thy name.
440
00:18:24,018 --> 00:18:25,351
Thy kingdom come.
441
00:18:25,436 --> 00:18:29,322
Thy will be done on earth
as it is in heaven.
442
00:18:29,407 --> 00:18:34,354
Give us this day our daily bread...
443
00:18:52,263 --> 00:18:55,631
Um, I just came to tell you that, uh...
444
00:18:58,052 --> 00:18:59,135
You don't have to worry about me anymore.
445
00:18:59,220 --> 00:19:00,970
I'm going to leave you alone.
446
00:19:01,022 --> 00:19:03,889
And I realize that you don't love me,
447
00:19:03,975 --> 00:19:05,057
and you tried to tell me that,
448
00:19:05,143 --> 00:19:06,799
and I guess I wish over time
449
00:19:06,986 --> 00:19:08,978
that you could have learned to love me,
450
00:19:09,063 --> 00:19:11,030
you know, like when you
hear those nice stories
451
00:19:11,115 --> 00:19:13,149
about arranged marriages
or Stockholm syndrome.
452
00:19:13,234 --> 00:19:14,984
- But...
- Oh, my god.
453
00:19:15,036 --> 00:19:16,533
Blah. Blah, blah, blah.
454
00:19:16,558 --> 00:19:17,870
Penelope, I...
455
00:19:17,955 --> 00:19:19,989
I'm trying to make a farewell speech here.
456
00:19:20,041 --> 00:19:21,991
Please don't make fun of me, okay?
457
00:19:22,043 --> 00:19:23,876
This is me saying adieu,
458
00:19:23,961 --> 00:19:25,961
so I do adieu you.
459
00:19:25,997 --> 00:19:27,913
Okay? So bye.
460
00:19:27,999 --> 00:19:29,999
Heh heh. Just get into the pool.
461
00:19:30,084 --> 00:19:32,665
Get into the water. Have fun.
462
00:19:32,690 --> 00:19:34,970
Can you stop swimming?
You're not listening to me.
463
00:19:35,006 --> 00:19:37,056
Where's that nectarine guy?
464
00:19:37,141 --> 00:19:39,719
Oh, he's gone. He was boring.
465
00:19:39,744 --> 00:19:43,396
Anyway, jump in the
water. It's so beautiful.
466
00:19:45,817 --> 00:19:46,899
Come on.
467
00:19:46,984 --> 00:19:48,517
[Scoff]
468
00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:07,870
Whoo-hoo!
469
00:20:07,922 --> 00:20:09,622
[Chuckling]
470
00:20:38,019 --> 00:20:39,686
Good night, Chips.
471
00:20:54,469 --> 00:20:58,921
Oh, hey. I got you the ad
in the White Pages.
472
00:20:59,006 --> 00:21:00,890
Thanks, Martha.
473
00:21:00,925 --> 00:21:02,591
That's nice.
474
00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:06,188
I see it. I see it. That's very nice.
475
00:21:06,704 --> 00:21:11,568
Synced and corrected by Nest0r
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476
00:21:11,618 --> 00:21:16,168
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