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00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:04,296
[J.D.] It's springtime at Sacred Heart,
2
00:00:04,404 --> 00:00:07,635
and the whole hospitalhad that end-of-the-year smell.
3
00:00:07,707 --> 00:00:11,541
Gloria, I need you to change
the dressing on Mr. Kerns' wound.
4
00:00:11,611 --> 00:00:13,636
And I need you to suck it.
5
00:00:13,713 --> 00:00:15,578
Wow, Gloria. Do you kiss your
6
00:00:15,648 --> 00:00:18,947
great-great-great-great-great
grandkids with that mouth?
7
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:21,249
# Zoom-zoom-zoom #
8
00:00:21,321 --> 00:00:23,551
Ted, that's funny.
Where's the chuckle?
9
00:00:23,623 --> 00:00:26,091
The bank foreclosed on my house.
10
00:00:26,159 --> 00:00:29,788
- Where's your mom?
- She's out in the car with the cats.
11
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:32,889
Dr. Kelso celebrated springby wearing his golf shorts
12
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:35,457
to flaunt his oddlyyouthful legs.
13
00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:37,493
Take them in, people.
14
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:40,396
I shaved for you.
15
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:42,974
[All groan]
16
00:00:44,177 --> 00:00:47,510
Tell your Daddy what you just did.
17
00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:51,183
I made a poopy in the potty.
18
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:53,185
You know, son, as a doctor,
19
00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:56,416
I spend a lot of my day
dealing with other people's poop.
20
00:00:56,523 --> 00:00:59,356
And I'm not going to lie to you,
Jackie, it gets old.
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00:00:59,426 --> 00:01:01,792
Now that's, that's not to say
22
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:06,161
I haven't enjoyed waking up to
a fresh brown trout in your Huggies.
23
00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:09,565
Besides, you're gonna do the
same thing for me some day real soon.
24
00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:12,935
And yet, aside from actually
seeing you being born
25
00:01:13,006 --> 00:01:16,567
and that time Wayne Gretzky said,
"What's up" to me in line at the bank,
26
00:01:16,676 --> 00:01:19,907
you out of diapers is the best
thing that's ever happened.
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00:01:19,979 --> 00:01:23,710
It truly is. Now why don't you go into
your room and play for a little while
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00:01:23,783 --> 00:01:26,343
because we're going
to celebrate grown-up style.
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00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:31,220
All right, get this over with. I need
a nap. I've been exhausted all week.
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00:01:31,291 --> 00:01:34,454
- Yippee!
- No kissing. Hands behind your back.
31
00:01:34,527 --> 00:01:35,858
Let's go.
32
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:39,092
Yep, love was definitely in the air.
33
00:01:39,165 --> 00:01:41,326
Hey, Kim. How'd you like
a night on the town
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00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:43,925
with the hottest doctor
in this place?
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00:01:44,003 --> 00:01:48,531
I'd rather just go out with you.
Oh! # Zoom-zoom-zoom #
36
00:01:48,608 --> 00:01:51,042
- You "zoom-zoom-zoom"?
- Of course.
37
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:53,739
- I invented the zoom-zoom-zoom.
- Oh. Cool.
38
00:01:53,813 --> 00:01:54,871
Liar!
39
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:59,282
So, Josh, you are suffering from
a condition called phimosis.
40
00:01:59,352 --> 00:02:02,116
It's basically a hardening
of your foreskin.
41
00:02:02,222 --> 00:02:06,591
As part of your treatment, I'm asking
you to masturbate five times a week.
42
00:02:06,659 --> 00:02:08,422
Help the poor kid out.
43
00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:11,862
Wow, five times a week, huh?
For me that would be cutting back.
44
00:02:11,931 --> 00:02:15,162
He said in front ofhis future girlfriend.
45
00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:19,335
You know what?
I should probably mosey.
46
00:02:20,406 --> 00:02:22,169
[Groans]
47
00:02:22,275 --> 00:02:23,435
[Gasps]
48
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,205
Looking forward to our date.
49
00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:36,049
See you around 6:00.
Wear something slutty.
50
00:02:36,122 --> 00:02:37,885
# Zoom-zoom-zoom! #
51
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:39,720
That's mine.
52
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:44,127
# I can't do this all on my own
53
00:02:44,197 --> 00:02:47,496
# No, I know I'm no Superman
54
00:02:50,803 --> 00:02:52,737
# I'm no Superman #
55
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:59,641
- Oh. You like that?
- Wow, I felt it move.
56
00:02:59,712 --> 00:03:03,546
- Todd, you're touching your crotch.
- I know. And I'm loving it.
57
00:03:05,318 --> 00:03:06,683
Hey, tubby.
58
00:03:06,786 --> 00:03:09,414
J.D., come here.
I want you to feel something quick.
59
00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:11,654
Ow!
60
00:03:11,724 --> 00:03:13,089
Don't call me tubby.
61
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,956
Pregnant witch.
62
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,586
Hey. There's Kim.
63
00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:20,462
She and Elliot bonded over an abilityto communicate at a speed of light.
64
00:03:20,567 --> 00:03:24,526
[Talking at a very high speed]
65
00:03:24,637 --> 00:03:27,663
You'd have to slow it downfor humans to understand.
66
00:03:28,441 --> 00:03:32,104
The shower's going to start at 4:00,
there's going to be food and games.
67
00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:35,807
You're such a good friend. I got her
a present, but since we're not close
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00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:38,350
I'm just going home
to get ready for my date.
69
00:03:39,452 --> 00:03:42,478
Oh. Hey, you.
I'm psyched for tonight.
70
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:46,685
Best thing about a date with J.D., if
you're having Chinese and want Mexican,
71
00:03:46,759 --> 00:03:49,091
you walk to the other
side of the food court.
72
00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:51,187
We are not going to the mall, Elliot.
73
00:03:51,264 --> 00:03:53,596
I was making you dinner,
then go to karaoke,
74
00:03:53,666 --> 00:03:56,430
but I'm not sure how to
do both in the same night.
75
00:03:56,502 --> 00:03:58,265
Unless, of course...
76
00:03:58,338 --> 00:04:00,306
J.D. Not Floating Head Doctor.
77
00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:02,307
Too late. I'm already there.
78
00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:07,379
Body could stay homeand prepare the feast.
79
00:04:11,317 --> 00:04:12,614
And as always...
80
00:04:12,685 --> 00:04:14,812
Head would handle entertainment.
81
00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:20,623
# Don't go breaking my heart
82
00:04:20,693 --> 00:04:24,527
# I couldn't if I tried
83
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:27,760
# Oh, honey if I get restless
84
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,358
Stop hogging the mic!
85
00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:31,130
Body, come!
86
00:04:31,204 --> 00:04:33,536
[Bugle march music]
87
00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:38,838
- [Crashing]
- [Crowd] Oh!
88
00:04:38,911 --> 00:04:40,344
[J.D.] Stupid body.
89
00:04:40,413 --> 00:04:42,711
I gotta do everything myself.
90
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:44,947
[Grunting]
91
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:48,454
# Ooh-hoo, nobody knows it
92
00:04:48,521 --> 00:04:51,684
Clap with me, clap with me!
# Nobody knows...
93
00:04:52,558 --> 00:04:54,423
Head loves karaoke.
94
00:04:54,494 --> 00:04:57,622
I'm up for anything.
I married my high school boyfriend,
95
00:04:57,697 --> 00:05:00,063
the only first date I went on
was in tenth grade.
96
00:05:00,166 --> 00:05:02,134
It began with me in
the back of his Miata
97
00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:04,135
because his friend called shotgun
98
00:05:04,203 --> 00:05:06,865
and ended with us going to
the arcade to, and I quote,
99
00:05:06,939 --> 00:05:10,238
"Eat pizza and beat up nerds."
And I married that guy.
100
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,939
Well, trust me, Kim.
I've beaten up many a nerds in my day,
101
00:05:14,013 --> 00:05:16,914
but tonight's about you
having the best first date ever.
102
00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,951
All right, slugger.
103
00:05:20,086 --> 00:05:23,249
- Bye!
- You don't have anything planned.
104
00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:28,089
You had to soil the food court thing.
It's veal piccata night at Sbarro's.
105
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,823
I'd help, but I'm
planning a baby shower for Carla.
106
00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:35,266
I am going to make this cafeteria
look totally different.
107
00:05:39,939 --> 00:05:42,499
# Baby, baby,
108
00:05:42,608 --> 00:05:45,634
# Baby, oooh
109
00:05:45,712 --> 00:05:50,206
# I want my baby back, baby back, babyback, baby back, baby back, baby back
110
00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:52,547
- # I want my baby back, baby back
- # Chili's
111
00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:54,108
# Baby back ribs
112
00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:58,089
- # I want my baby back ribs
- # Barbecue sauce
113
00:05:58,157 --> 00:06:00,990
- # I want my baby back, baby back
- # Chili's...
114
00:06:01,060 --> 00:06:02,391
Ted, what the hell?
115
00:06:02,462 --> 00:06:04,623
It's the only song we know
with "baby."
116
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:06,392
I want my money back.
117
00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:08,991
- What money?
- What? I lost my house.
118
00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:10,126
Give me a break.
119
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,569
Fun, right?
120
00:06:12,672 --> 00:06:14,640
No one is mingling.
121
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:16,834
Why are the morgue guys
so damn cliquey?
122
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:18,877
I want yellow.
123
00:06:20,980 --> 00:06:23,414
I wish I had cool morgue friends.
124
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:25,246
Hey guys!
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00:06:25,351 --> 00:06:27,114
- [Carla] Ooooh!
- [Turk] Oh.
126
00:06:27,186 --> 00:06:30,019
Laverne, I didn't know you knit.
127
00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:33,525
I sure do. Mr. Roberts doesn't have
one pair of store-bought socks.
128
00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:35,322
I'm gonna knit you a muzzle.
129
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,090
Those are all from us.
130
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:39,495
[Jordan] It's just Jack's old baby crap.
131
00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:42,534
We're really excited
to get rid of all that stuff
132
00:06:42,602 --> 00:06:44,934
and watch you guys suffer
through the hellish
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00:06:45,004 --> 00:06:48,770
relationship-ruining nightmare
that is the baby phase.
134
00:06:48,875 --> 00:06:50,809
- Open something.
- Go ahead.
135
00:06:52,345 --> 00:06:54,313
- Those are my workout pants.
- Uh-huh.
136
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:57,781
She's been trying to get rid of
those, but I'll be honest with you,
137
00:06:57,884 --> 00:07:01,752
I love them cause they're so comfortable
and you can get them on real quick.
138
00:07:03,189 --> 00:07:05,157
You ain't lying.
139
00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:07,192
Baby, check it out.
140
00:07:08,027 --> 00:07:09,858
Wonderful. Thank you.
141
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:12,962
Why can't we just talk to people?
142
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:14,761
This is the baby games station.
143
00:07:14,834 --> 00:07:16,699
Once we start,
people will join us.
144
00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:19,829
OK, guess what flavor
baby food this is?
145
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:25,204
- Cab driver feet?
- No, Keith, it's turnips!
146
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,439
You got it wrong,
finish the whole jar!
147
00:07:27,513 --> 00:07:29,003
You guys, this is so much fun!
148
00:07:29,081 --> 00:07:30,207
[Gagging]
149
00:07:31,350 --> 00:07:33,580
Where the hell are
all your intern friends?
150
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:38,421
Listen up, interns.
151
00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:41,824
Notice the definition
in the upper calf.
152
00:07:41,894 --> 00:07:43,418
Look at it, damn it!
153
00:07:44,163 --> 00:07:45,323
See that?
154
00:07:45,398 --> 00:07:49,562
Back in 'Nam, the choppers would hover
eight feet above my head, I'd jump in.
155
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:52,001
You should've seen
the look on Charlie's face.
156
00:07:52,104 --> 00:07:54,402
Not the enemy, son,
the pilot, Charlie Ross.
157
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,999
Great guy. He didn't make it back.
158
00:07:57,076 --> 00:08:00,102
- Where's the cake?
- Eight feet? I don't believe it.
159
00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:05,346
Believe that, missy.
160
00:08:05,451 --> 00:08:08,318
I have to get ready. I want
my date with Kim to be perfect.
161
00:08:08,387 --> 00:08:11,845
What do you think about a romantic
horseback ride on the beach?
162
00:08:11,924 --> 00:08:14,085
- Like we did for your birthday?
- Yeah.
163
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:17,527
- Except this time with two horses.
- Why not take her to your deck?
164
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:19,928
You guys can lie out
and look at the stars.
165
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,762
Unfortunately, I can't.
166
00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:25,861
My deck has become sort of a cruising
spot for older gay gentlemen.
167
00:08:26,572 --> 00:08:28,870
Get off my porch, you old queens.
168
00:08:28,941 --> 00:08:30,909
[Disco music playing]
169
00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:32,443
Who's is this?
170
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,070
Who's is this?
171
00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:36,705
You find somewhere else to hang out!
172
00:08:36,782 --> 00:08:39,546
I know for a fact Les Mis is in town!
173
00:08:40,653 --> 00:08:44,749
I tried turning my hose on them,
but they liked it.
174
00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:46,485
If anything, good luck, buddy.
175
00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:48,618
[Barbershop quartet]
# Barbecue sauce
176
00:08:48,961 --> 00:08:50,292
[J.D.] I didn't need luck,
177
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:53,924
because this was going to bethe most romantic first date ever.
178
00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:55,961
Your steed, my lady.
179
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:59,937
J.D., I've never ridden
a horse on a beach before.
180
00:09:00,006 --> 00:09:01,564
[Kim chuckles]
181
00:09:03,175 --> 00:09:05,507
And upsie-daisy.
182
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:09,746
Woo! No saddles?
You going to be OK riding bareback?
183
00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:12,517
No problemo.
184
00:09:13,486 --> 00:09:16,455
What's so hard about riding bareback?
185
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:22,490
[# Nazareth: Love Hurts]
186
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:30,074
Promoot uw product of merk hier
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org vandaag nog
187
00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:41,046
Oh, that was amazing!
Wasn't that so much fun?
188
00:09:41,113 --> 00:09:42,774
Oh yeah. That was awesome.
189
00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:46,575
Thank you.
190
00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:49,120
Is this for when we
buy the baby a dog?
191
00:09:49,188 --> 00:09:52,351
No. It's a baby cage.
192
00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:53,948
It's a good one, too.
193
00:09:54,026 --> 00:09:56,517
When I was a kid,
mine didn't have these windows.
194
00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:59,861
It's perfect. If you go out for dinner,
it's got a water bottle,
195
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:03,095
so you throw some cedar chips
in there so the baby can poop,
196
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:04,534
you're made in the shade.
197
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:07,970
I'm kidding!
198
00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:10,406
It's for when they
buy the baby a, uh, puppy.
199
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:11,841
Oh!
200
00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:13,775
[Laughter]
201
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,314
This one's from me and Keith.
202
00:10:19,051 --> 00:10:22,179
He's here in the bathroom,
throwing up summer squash.
203
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:24,880
Let's see here.
204
00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:26,515
Oooh.
205
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,389
It's a preggy-teddy.
206
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:31,521
I got it at that new
maternity lingerie store at the mall.
207
00:10:31,597 --> 00:10:34,862
I had a conversation with
the sweet, old lady who owns the place.
208
00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:38,301
Not many pregnant women shop there.
It's mostly just fat whores.
209
00:10:38,404 --> 00:10:41,339
- [All] Oh.
- I got to get me one of those.
210
00:10:42,441 --> 00:10:45,410
Say, Bobbo. You want to
weigh in on pregnancy sex?
211
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,106
- It's a freak show.
- You've seen an ultrasound.
212
00:10:48,180 --> 00:10:50,148
They have eyes, they have hands.
213
00:10:50,249 --> 00:10:52,979
How do you think they're going
to react to an intruder?
214
00:10:53,052 --> 00:10:54,019
[Grunting]
215
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,611
The baby can't
grab me down there.
216
00:10:56,689 --> 00:10:59,214
- The baby can't grab me down there?
- No, baby.
217
00:11:02,261 --> 00:11:05,628
I called an ambulance, but you
should really let me examine you.
218
00:11:05,698 --> 00:11:07,427
Oh, no, no.
The date continues.
219
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:11,231
I'm a urologist. And there's a
good chance you have testicular torsion.
220
00:11:11,303 --> 00:11:15,069
In which case, you could lose
a testicle. Come on. Off with the pants.
221
00:11:15,975 --> 00:11:18,603
Looks like my plan is working.
222
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:22,739
Detruser function is normal. One is
significantly larger than the other.
223
00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:25,716
Actually, that's a
pre-existing condition.
224
00:11:25,785 --> 00:11:28,720
- So the right one's always been bigger?
- Yes. Wait.
225
00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:32,224
- Your right or stage right?
- Let me test the retraction.
226
00:11:32,725 --> 00:11:34,659
Retracted.
227
00:11:34,727 --> 00:11:37,423
OK, the date's not goingexactly as planned,
228
00:11:37,496 --> 00:11:41,227
but you can still save it with yourlegendary gift for small-talk.
229
00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:43,962
So, you're from Texas, huh?
230
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:46,903
They say that's the Lone Star State.
231
00:11:46,972 --> 00:11:49,440
What exactly does that mean?
232
00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:53,472
My boobs are so big right now.
233
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:57,607
I think Dr. Fishman threw in something
a little extra when he did my chin.
234
00:11:57,683 --> 00:12:02,416
Would you, would you like to see
something really, just, beautiful?
235
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:05,457
There goes all of
Jackie-boy's baby stuff.
236
00:12:06,692 --> 00:12:10,822
No, Mom, playpenlbaby cage
is not like tomatoltomahto.
237
00:12:13,265 --> 00:12:15,790
I hope you're not beating
yourself up about this.
238
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:18,769
Sorry, I wanted to do
something fun for our first date.
239
00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:21,864
No. It was so much more fun
then, then you think.
240
00:12:21,941 --> 00:12:24,501
I mean, the first seven
or eight minutes rocked.
241
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,943
Admittedly, it was more
like work after that.
242
00:12:27,012 --> 00:12:29,310
But at least I got
to third base with you.
243
00:12:29,381 --> 00:12:31,008
And there it was.
244
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:35,782
The moment where pity was turning intogenuine affection. Classic Dorian.
245
00:12:36,956 --> 00:12:39,618
I feel like we kind of
missed first base.
246
00:12:40,025 --> 00:12:42,152
Me, too.
247
00:12:42,228 --> 00:12:45,197
- Well, maybe we should fix that.
- We should.
248
00:12:45,297 --> 00:12:47,128
And then it happened.
249
00:12:47,199 --> 00:12:49,326
[Dramatic music]
250
00:12:49,401 --> 00:12:52,234
- [Man] Elliot Reid. Moment Killer.
- [Machine gun sound]
251
00:12:52,304 --> 00:12:53,464
What's up, guys?
252
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,408
Tell me every detail about the date.
253
00:12:56,475 --> 00:13:00,241
- We went horseback riding on the beach.
- Yes. I've been on that date.
254
00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:03,338
- Really?
- What? I had a coupon.
255
00:13:03,415 --> 00:13:06,441
I wasn't the only oneto have an uninvited guest.
256
00:13:06,519 --> 00:13:09,044
[Groans] You know what sucks?
257
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:14,058
I didn't even eat any of that crappy
shower food and I still feel nauseous.
258
00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:17,289
In fact, I've been nauseous
for, like, two weeks.
259
00:13:18,497 --> 00:13:19,987
[Gasping]
260
00:13:20,065 --> 00:13:22,226
I've been exhausted all week.
261
00:13:23,102 --> 00:13:26,401
My boobs are so big right now.
262
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:31,009
Yep, I'm pregnant.
263
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:42,680
I pooped in my bed
so I put it on the TV.
264
00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:53,894
Forgive me, but since
I had a vasectomy last year,
265
00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:58,766
nay, two vasectomies, I feel,
I feel I just have to ask.
266
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:01,500
- Did you cheat on me?
- No.
267
00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:05,135
- And you know me. I always tell.
- Oh, that's true.
268
00:14:05,244 --> 00:14:07,576
That's pretty much why
we work well together.
269
00:14:11,984 --> 00:14:13,679
Are you responsible for this?
270
00:14:13,752 --> 00:14:15,117
What are you talking about?
271
00:14:15,221 --> 00:14:17,746
I'm selling my old mop.
The 2007 s are in.
272
00:14:17,823 --> 00:14:18,949
Sorry.
273
00:14:23,495 --> 00:14:26,987
All right, Kim's right there.
We spent all morning crafting a line
274
00:14:27,066 --> 00:14:30,160
so raw with confidence,
that if you pull it off,
275
00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:33,399
- you're back in the game.
- I'm afraid, Mocha Bear.
276
00:14:33,472 --> 00:14:35,531
I know. Buck up!
277
00:14:37,977 --> 00:14:40,810
- Hey, Kim.
- Oh, hey, J.D. How're you feeling?
278
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,643
Well, uh...
279
00:14:45,217 --> 00:14:47,344
...the swelling's gone down...
280
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:49,744
...for now.
281
00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:02,067
You're an idiot.
282
00:15:04,136 --> 00:15:05,797
Go out with me again tonight.
283
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:10,137
Oh, J.D., I'd love to, but I'm
going to a Neil Diamond concert.
284
00:15:10,209 --> 00:15:11,870
With who?
285
00:15:11,944 --> 00:15:14,469
[Dramatic music]
286
00:15:14,546 --> 00:15:18,107
- [Man] Elliot Reid. Moment Killer.
- [Machine gun sound]
287
00:15:18,217 --> 00:15:20,185
- What's up? Are you psyched?
- Hey.
288
00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:21,583
- I'm so psyched.
- Me too.
289
00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,555
[Imitates Neil Diamond]
# Everywhere around the world
290
00:15:25,724 --> 00:15:28,284
# They're coming to America
291
00:15:32,331 --> 00:15:36,097
Could I, uh, could I
have everybody's attention, please.
292
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,233
Jordan's pregnant.
293
00:15:38,304 --> 00:15:40,397
You get over here, you!
294
00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:43,305
- Not a hug moment, sweetie.
- Right. Yes.
295
00:15:43,375 --> 00:15:46,936
[Talking in high-pitched voice]
No. But Dr. Cox,
296
00:15:47,012 --> 00:15:50,778
here I thought you and Jordan were done
trying to have any more babies.
297
00:15:50,849 --> 00:15:53,409
We were, but my vasectomy didn't take
298
00:15:53,485 --> 00:15:55,749
which, apparently,
is not that uncommon.
299
00:15:55,821 --> 00:15:59,052
[High-pitched voice] Holy crap, Dr. Cox.
300
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:02,821
That must have really pissed you off.
[Regular voice] Yes, it did.
301
00:16:02,895 --> 00:16:05,193
What is, what is your name?
302
00:16:05,264 --> 00:16:08,199
[High-pitched voice]
Oh, I'm any generic hospital worker
303
00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:10,326
who happens to ask you a question
304
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:13,963
about your pregnancy
andlor any baby-related issues.
305
00:16:14,073 --> 00:16:16,166
[Regular voice] Isn't that nice?
306
00:16:17,776 --> 00:16:20,336
This morality play was made
possible by a grant
307
00:16:20,412 --> 00:16:23,074
from the Just See IfI Was Kidding Foundation.
308
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:24,979
[Chuckling]
309
00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:28,144
- Do you want to do it, or should I?
- Let's just do it together.
310
00:16:29,221 --> 00:16:31,189
[Mimicking baby scream]
311
00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:33,982
[Turk and Carla laughing]
312
00:16:34,059 --> 00:16:35,492
That's from The Simpsons.
313
00:16:35,561 --> 00:16:36,823
Ah, yes.
314
00:16:38,430 --> 00:16:40,921
I'm having a heart attack.
315
00:16:45,337 --> 00:16:47,805
Did you guys hear what
Jordan and Dr. Cox and did
316
00:16:47,873 --> 00:16:50,205
to the doctor who botched his vasectomy?
317
00:16:51,477 --> 00:16:52,501
Go Ted.
318
00:16:52,578 --> 00:16:56,810
# I want my baby back, baby back, babyback, baby back, baby back, baby back
319
00:16:56,882 --> 00:17:00,909
# I want my baby back, baby back, babyback, baby back, baby back, baby back
320
00:17:00,986 --> 00:17:03,546
# I want my baby back, baby back,baby back, baby back
321
00:17:03,622 --> 00:17:06,853
- Dear God, when do they say "ribs?"
- [Cox] Never.
322
00:17:06,925 --> 00:17:08,358
They never say "ribs."
323
00:17:08,427 --> 00:17:12,158
# I want my baby back, baby back, babyback, baby back, baby back, baby back
324
00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:14,995
# I want my baby back, baby back,baby back, baby back...
325
00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:18,703
I heard ten minutes into it,
he started eating his face.
326
00:17:18,771 --> 00:17:19,738
He did.
327
00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:24,332
You know what J.D.'s got planned since
it's his day off and he's dateless?
328
00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:27,244
[Engines revving]
329
00:17:29,014 --> 00:17:31,710
This is my first scooter rally.
330
00:17:31,784 --> 00:17:33,752
Do you want to be Ponch or Jon?
331
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:39,085
I can imagine what Jordan and
Dr. Cox are feeling right now.
332
00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:45,886
Do you really think
we can handle this?
333
00:17:45,964 --> 00:17:47,522
I don't know.
334
00:17:47,633 --> 00:17:50,693
[Elliot] I can totallypicture J.D., too.
335
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:01,977
[Cell phone ringing]
336
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:07,643
Oh, hey, Mom.
337
00:18:07,719 --> 00:18:11,746
No, I'm just hanging out alone tonight.
I didn't have anything else to do.
338
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,587
[Knocking on door]
339
00:18:17,029 --> 00:18:19,122
We want to give you
your stuff back.
340
00:18:19,198 --> 00:18:21,894
We don't feel like
dealing with that right now.
341
00:18:21,967 --> 00:18:24,094
- How about now?
- Oh.
342
00:18:26,905 --> 00:18:27,963
Come on in.
343
00:18:32,377 --> 00:18:36,438
Ugh. I hate cleaning upafter those messy old queens.
344
00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:38,483
Ooh, appletini?
345
00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:41,314
When did they startdrinking straight guy drinks?
346
00:18:41,386 --> 00:18:43,877
Mmm. It's fresh.
347
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,117
[Kim] What's up, chicken butt?
348
00:18:46,725 --> 00:18:48,989
Hey, Kim. What happened
to Neil Diamond?
349
00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:52,188
I haven't seen Keith in a while,
I'm gonna take him.
350
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:53,993
Kim's letting me off the hook.
351
00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:55,590
Thank you.
352
00:18:55,667 --> 00:18:57,362
You're welcome.
353
00:19:04,676 --> 00:19:08,237
- What's up?
- Nothing.
354
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:11,415
It seems like good friendsalways come through for you
355
00:19:12,518 --> 00:19:14,383
- You like?
- Oh, well.
356
00:19:14,453 --> 00:19:17,820
You know, I could,
I could wear them out to dinner.
357
00:19:18,924 --> 00:19:21,085
- With a sports jacket?
- No.
358
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:23,661
It's OK. Don't get up.
I got it. [groans]
359
00:19:23,729 --> 00:19:27,062
- OK.
- It's only your child.
360
00:19:27,566 --> 00:19:30,467
Look, I feel like I can
give you a list of things
361
00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:33,164
that are sucky about being pregnant.
For starters,
362
00:19:33,238 --> 00:19:36,605
I'm now horny as I've ever been
and my husband is repulsed by me.
363
00:19:37,109 --> 00:19:40,078
Listen, if you really need it
that badly, I will suck it up
364
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:42,807
and shut my eyes so tight
and then do you.
365
00:19:42,881 --> 00:19:45,850
- Thank you for the sacrifice.
- It's because I love you.
366
00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:47,714
My point is,
367
00:19:47,819 --> 00:19:50,185
even with all the crap,
I'm sure it's worth it.
368
00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:53,656
I've seen how happy
having Jack has made you two.
369
00:19:53,725 --> 00:19:55,590
And yeah, I know it's been hard,
370
00:19:55,661 --> 00:19:58,789
but I know that neither one of you
regret any of it.
371
00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:00,195
[Rattling]
372
00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:02,858
What the hell is this thing?
373
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:06,426
That's Jack's mobile.
Actually, it's his third mobile.
374
00:20:06,505 --> 00:20:08,871
The first two were
embedded in the dry-wall.
375
00:20:08,974 --> 00:20:11,238
They can be quite frustrating
to assemble.
376
00:20:11,310 --> 00:20:16,043
Do you remember when he was teething?
He'd stare up at that thing for hours.
377
00:20:17,282 --> 00:20:18,647
Yep.
378
00:20:22,020 --> 00:20:23,885
Why's your TV smell like do-do?
379
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:29,986
So, what do you want to do tonight?
380
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,993
Just hang here and look at the stars
381
00:20:33,098 --> 00:20:36,795
until we're comfortable enough
to make out a little.
382
00:20:36,868 --> 00:20:38,961
OK. I'm cool with that.
383
00:20:39,037 --> 00:20:42,473
[# Neil Diamond: Delirious Love]
384
00:20:42,541 --> 00:20:44,600
- Not yet.
- Let me know.
385
00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:49,677
And like that, I felt like all wasright with the couples in the world.
386
00:21:26,752 --> 00:21:29,084
[Hissing]
387
00:21:49,107 --> 00:21:50,870
OK, now.
388
00:21:57,683 --> 00:22:01,050
And right then, I knew this was thestart of something important.
389
00:22:09,227 --> 00:22:10,455
[Knocking on door]
390
00:22:13,231 --> 00:22:16,564
Two and a half weeks is too long
to wait for a third date.
391
00:22:16,635 --> 00:22:19,001
I'm pregnant.
392
00:22:19,071 --> 00:22:20,766
What now?
393
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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394
00:22:21,305 --> 00:22:27,466
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