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Today, on 5 November
I start with my report.

I will write everything as accurate
as I am able.

But I do not even Weir,
if today really the 5th November.

In the course of the past winter
have come to me missing a few days.

Even the week
I can not say.

but I think
this is not very important.

I am dependent on sparse notes.

Sparse, because I never reckoned
to write this report,

and I fear that in my memory
is much different from what I experienced it.

This lack
adheres well to all reports.

I do not write
for the joy of writing.

It has just so happened
I have to write,

if I do not
want to lose his mind.

It's no one there,
could think of and care for me.

I'm all alone,
and I must try

the long dark winter months
to survive.

I have taken this task upon me,
because it will save you from me

to stare into the twilight
and to fear me.

Because I fear. From all sides
the fear creeps up to me,

and I do not want to wait
until they reached me and overwhelmed.

I will write until it gets dark.

And this new unfamiliar work
to make my tired head,

empty and sleepy.

In the morning I will not fear.
Only the long dusky afternoons.

I write
on the back of old calendars

business and on aged paper.

The paper comes from Hugo R�ttlinger,
groren a collector and hypochondriac.

Hugo was supposed to
this report begin

for if his acquisitiveness and hypochondria
not been, I S�re not be here today.

I probably would
no longer alive.

until about three clock
we reached the cabin.

After a snack,
Hugo was just starting to doze,

Louise suggested before him,
with it another go into Do_.

Come on!

We did not stay long,
We go tomorrow very early in the hunt.

The car key is inserted
if you meet wills t.

Come on!
- Yes.

Where is it lynx?
Lynx?

The dog is there!
The stupid cattle dog does not follow, yes.

Lynx? Lynx, come on!

go nicely with FuR.

Come on, Lynx!

You go in FuR!
- Do not be so strict.

Lynx, if you do not go with Fu_,
you stay up here. Go back!

Go! Go!

At nine clock, I decided to
to go to bed.

I locked the door and took
the key with me to my room.

Well, lynx? What's going on?

The two had to be left in Do_.
I wondered very much about it.

Hugo loathed
the short inn beds.

And he would never
been so ruthlessly,

leave me alone overnight.

Then I made with Lynx
on the way to Do_.

I could not explain,
what had happened.

I hardly noticed
how the canyon was cool and moist,

because I was pondering about
what had become of the R�ttlingers.

Maybe Hugo had
suffered a heart attack.

As it happens with hypochondriacs, we had
its states no longer taken seriously.

I quickened my steps
and sent ahead lynx.

I had not
thought of my hiking boots

and stumbled awkwardly
the scha_en stones behind him.

Lynx! Lynx?

Lynx? Lynx, what is it?

What did you do?
Did you hurt yourself?

Have you bitten your tongue?

Lynx come!

Come on!

Lynx, what is it?

Come on!

Then I heard loud knocking
and looked at me before I begri_,

that it was my own heartbeat,
the blasting in my ears.

My heart had been feared,
before I knew it.

Hesitantly, I try it again.

And again rested my hand
such as a window on the disk.

Suddenly I realized what I subconsciously
the whole time might have tortured

that the road was completely empty.

Irgendjemand had
but have long sounded the alarm.

It would have been natural

the Do_leute were curious
accumulated in front of the wall.

Even if none of them
the wall had discovered

but had Hugo and Louise
gestoKen be on it.

Was that not a single person to see
seemed even more puzzling than the wall.

I was still three times and convinced
me from that here, three feet in front of me

really something invisible,
Smooth, Cool, was

which prevented me from going on.

I thought of an illusion, but
I knew that it was nothing of the kind.

I had my lighter
reconciled with a little craziness

as with the terrible,
invisible thing.

The first little farmstead
really just a Keusch'e,

was just around the next bend.

Finally I could see the Chaste.

She lay very still in the sunlight.
A peaceful, familiar picture.

Sorry!
Sorry, I...

Come lynx. Come on!

We were caught in a bad situation,
Lynx and I,

and we did not at that time,
how bad it was.

But we were not completely lost,
because there were two.

It just could not be true,
Such things simply did not happen.

And if it happened but,
not in a small Do_ in the mountains,

not in Upper Austria
and not in Europe.

I Weik,
how ridiculous this idea was

but since then I thought exactly
I will not hide it.

I woke up at six clock,
as the birds sing lifted.

Although I had hardly moved me
Lynx knew that I was awake,

and came to my bed
begr�Ren to me.!

Suddenly it seemed to me quite impossible
this fine day in May to survive.

At the same time I knew
I had to survive it

and that for me
was no escape route.

I had to keep very quiet
and it simply survive.

It was not even the first day of my
Life, I had to survive.

The less I resisted,
it would be more bearable.

I do not remember,
what I did that morning.

Maybe were the following hours
so bad that I had forgotten.

Maybe I spent it in only one
Type anesthesia. I do not remember.

I only re-emerged
against two clock in the afternoon,

when I was using lynx
went through the gorge.

This time I was better equipped.
Also Hugo binoculars I had it.

If the man at the well was dead,
and because I could no longer doubt,

had to be dead all the people in the valley,
and not just the people.

Everything was alive.

If that was the death,
he came very quickly and smoothly,

in an almost loving way.

Perhaps it would have been wiser
to go with Hugo and Louise into Do_.

Lynx!

What's going on? Lynx?

Here, Lynx!

Lynx!

Comm

Yes, come on.

In the meantime had become clear to me

that this cow indeed a blessing
but also a groRe load was.

Thus, an animal wants fed and milked
and are calling for a sedentary Lord.

I was the owner
and the prisoner of a cow.

Of course, I also thought
by the cow.

When I was very lucky,
they expected a calf.

But it
I du_te not leave me.

I could only ho_en, my cow
'll give milk as long as possible.

Again and yet I thought of my situation
as a temporary state

or at least tried to do so.

I thought of a name for my cow
and called her Bella.

Actually, they would have
no name needed.

She was the only cow in the forest.

Perhaps the only cow in the country.

Until tomorrow, Bella.

Ten days had passed, and nothing
had changed in my situation.

For ten days I had to work
stunned, but the wall was still there,

and no one had come
to get me.

There was nothing left for me, as I
to finally face reality.

I could kill me or try to
me to dig under the wall,

which is probably only a toilsome
Would have been kind of suicide.

And of course I could stay here
and try to stay alive.

To think seriously about suicide,
I was not young enough.

Mainly kept me
the thought of lynx and Bella on it.

Thanks to Hugo's welfare I Besak inventories,
the rich want the summer,

a home,
Wood for life and a cow.

I decided I also found
wind the watch every day

and swabbed one days from the calendar.

This seemed to me very important.

I clung to the almost
scanty remains of human order.

WEIR I do not know why I'm doing this.

It is almost an inner compulsion,
that drives me.

Maybe I'm afraid
if I could otherwise

I would slowly stop
to be human,

and would soon be dirty
crawl about and smelly

and unintelligible sounds ausstoRen.

Not that I feared an animal
to be, that would not be very bad.

But a man
can never be an animal,

He rushes over to the animal
into an abyss.

I do not want my zust�Rt this.

In recent times I have
just before the gr�Rte fear.

And this fear
I can write my report.

On 30 May, rained all day
a warm, fertile rain,

which forced me to stay in the hut,
if I did not want to be soaked.

That evening
the cat came to my house.

So we were four.
The cow, the cat, lynx and me.

Lynx was closest to me.

He soon became not only my dog,
but my friend.

My only friend
in a world of trouble and loneliness.

If yes good lynx.

Although I was by Bella
confined to his cabin,

but I wanted to try me
a little look around the area.

I remembered a way to the
an elevated hunting cabin led,

and from there down
in the opposite valley.

I wanted to go there.

Lynx! In FuR!

Wait, Lynx!

Now I had the valleys,
I could reach,

without staying away for days, e_orscht.

I was able to ascend to the pasture
and from there the land survey,

But further into the mountain range
I could not dare me.

Of course, you would find me,
if there were no wall over there.

Yes, I had to say,
that one would have to find me long ago.

I was calm at home
sit and wait.

But again and again
I felt driven me to

itself against something
to take the uncertainty.

Against a clock noon I rested myself.

The forest was dunstend in the midday sun,

and warm scent clouds
rose on your socks to me.

It was now much quieter
as the moon,

as would the forest sleeping paralyzed
under the yellow sun.

A bird of prey
pulled up in his blue circles.

Lynx sleeping with twitching ears,

and the silence groRe
sank like a bell about me.

I wish
always sit here d�_en,

at elevated temperature, in the light,

fueren to the dog
and the circling birds at the head.

When I had to go,
I did it with deep regret,

and slowly I venNandelte me
go back to the only creature

did not belong,
into a man,

the kinky thoughts harbored the branches
buckled with his clumsy shoes

and the bloody business
hunting operation.

It strikes me that I
I never stated in my calendar

When I shot a deer.

Now, I remember also that I
was simply contrary to write it.

It was enough already,
I had to do it.

I called the little cat pearl,
Weir and because she was so rosy.

In a few weeks I realized
that pearl, the zausige little thing,

in Begri_ was
to transform into a beauty.

Pearl was a small miracle

But even then I knew
that she was born in the wrong place.

A long-haired, middle wei_e cat
in the forest is doomed to early death.

She had no chance.

Maybe I had it therefore so much.

When I think back to the first summer,

rather, it is of concern
overshadowed by my animals

as from my own
desperate situation.

The disaster had me
removed a groRe responsibility

and without that I noticed it immediately,
a new burden imposed.

When I finally got the situation
could see,

I was no longer able
anything to change it.

I do not think that my behavior
Weakness or sentimentality arose.

I just followed a drive,
was implanted in me,

and I could not fight if
I did not want to destroy yourself.

I do not Weir,
what should it be dishonorable,

like other animals
to carry the load imposed,

and ultimately
like any animal to die.

I Weir, which is not even honor.

Are born and die
is not honorable.

It happens to every creature
and also means nothing.

On 20 July
I started with the hay.

I took three weeks
reap the meadow.

It was not only
the changing weather to blame

but my clumsiness
and physical weakness.

I suffered a severe attack
discouragement

and e_asste for the first time clearly
which blow had hit me.

I do not WEIR, what would have happened
I would have the responsibility

not forced for my animals to
the necessary things to do.

I remember very reluctant
at this time.

It took 14 days to get me
finally able to rouse again

and began to live again.

The autumn was always
the favorite season

if I am physically
never felt very comfortable.

During the day I was tired and still be monitored.

At night I lay for hours
in a troubled doze

and dreamed confused
and livelier than usual

The fall of disease
spared me not even in the woods.

But I could hardly allow me,
they came to mitigated.

Maybe I did not have time
they especially observed.

Lynx was very exhilarated and happy,

but a stranger would probably
noticed no difference.

He was almost always cheerful.

I never saw him more than three minutes
grumpy seen.

He could simply call,
to be happy, do not resist.

And life in the forest
was a constant lure for him.

Sun, snow, wind, rain,

everything was a cause for excitement.

I was next to Lynx
never long remain sad.

It was almost embarrassing how happy
it made him to be with me.

Perhaps the man owes
his Gr�Renwahn the dog.

Sometimes even I imagined,
it would have to be something special to me,

if lynx at my sight
joy almost overturned.

Of course, never was special to me.

Lynx was like all dogs
simply addicted people.

Yes, you're my lynx. Yes.

're A good dog.

Sometimes when I'm alone now
'm traveling in wintry forest

I speak as before to lynx.

I do not Weir, that I do,

to me something startles
and I fall silent.

I turn my head and catch sight of
the glimmer of a reddish brown coat.

But the path is empty,
bare shrubs and wet stones.

It does not surprise me that I still
hear the branches crackle behind me

under the light tread of his soles.

Where else should his little dog soul
haunted as on my track?

It's a friendly ghost,
and I do not fear him.

Lynx, nice, good dog,
my dog.

Probably only makes my poor head
the sound of your footsteps,

the glimmer of your coat.

As long as I exist, you'll be my trail
ve_olgen, hungry and yearning,

like myself hungry and yearning
invisible traces ve_olge.

We will never ask both our game.

On 27 October fell the first snow.

The onset of winter
lasted only a few days.

After that came the hair and licked
the young snow from the mountains.

It was uncomfortably warm,

and the wind blew night and day
snarling at the little house.

I slept badly
and listened to the roaring of the stags,

in the rutting season
rose from the heights.

Both cats went out there
in the warm, damp forest.

I lay awake
and was worried about pearl.

The roaring of the stags sounded sad,
threatening and sometimes almost desperate.

I only hoped
the hair would not take too long

and finally winter Us
bring a little peace.

The hair dryer did
really only three days,

long enough
to kill pearl.

Pearl was buried,

and the hair dryer died overnight,
as if he had e_�llt his task.

I have not forgotten pearl.

LHR death was the first loss
I suffered in the forest.

Once,
it must have been the first winter,

I saw a fox standing by the stream.

I could sheer it.
I carried the gun with me.

But I did not.

Pearl died because one of their Vo_ahren
an Angora cat was bred on.

It was intended from the beginning as a victim.

Should I help
punish the beautiful vivid fox?

Pearl was wide_ahren an injustice.

But this injustice
was also done to their victims.

Should I pass it on to the fox?

The only creature in the woods that really
Can do right or wrong, I am.

And only I can practice mercy.

Sometimes I wish this burden
the decision would be not to me.

But I'm a man. And I can
just think and act like a man.

Of which will free me until death.

When I think of winter, I always see
Weir on the river are tired fox.

A lonely, adult animal,
his is the path laid down.

It is to me then, as mean
this something important for me.

As it stands only as a sign
for something else.

But I can not recognize its meaning.

Sun

Yes, my Bella.

Yes, beautifully's you

Bella had again become rounded,

but I still could not know
whether they expected a calf.

After all,
what we have experienced together,

Bella has become more than my cow

a poor, patient sister,
which it contributes with more dignity than I lot.

In the night
I heard the wood crack in the cold.

I had refilled strong, but I
shivered and could not sleep.

Sometimes a crackling log on
and went out again,

and I felt sick.

I knew it was them,
I had to kill again and again.

I imagined what a person
may feel, the killing is fun.

I did not succeed.

The hairs stood on end
on my arms,

and my mouth
was dry in disgust.

You had to be born, probably.

I was able to bring me there,
to do it as quickly as possible and sent

but I would never get used.

Long I lay awake
in the roaring darkness

and thought of the little heart,

the above me in the chamber
froze into a block of ice.

After the cold broke groren
a wave humid, warmer air inside.

Bella was restless, and I had
ten times a day to see her.

At 11 January Bella was bleeding a little.

It was after the evening feeding,

and I decided to
I set up for the night in the barn.

Come on, Bella! Hard!

hard!

Come on, Bella, come on!

So much had
occurred in recent times.

Pearl had been killed,
a little bull was born into the world,

Deer were e_roren, and the varmints
had a fat winter.

I myself had a lot of excitement
behind me, and now I was tired.

And when I closed my eyes,
I saw snow mountains on the horizon,

Weire flakes,
which sank on my face,

, in a large, bright silence.

There were no thoughts, no memories,

only the groRe, silent light snow.

I knew that this idea of
was a lonely man dangerous

but I could not muster the strength to
me to resist.

Lynx Lier me not long in peace.

Again and again he came
and bull at me with his nose.

I sighed and stood up
and went to my daily work.

Now Lynx is not more
my friend and guardian.

And the desire in the Weire,
enter into painful silence,

is sometimes of very large.

I must himself pay attention to me
be strict and when I was there earlier.

Lynx was my sixth sense.

Since he is dead,
I feel like an amputee.

Something is missing and I will always miss you.

It's not just that I him at
hunting and Tracing miss

and hours
must be taken nachklettern a game.

That alone is not.

The worst thing is that I
without lynx really feel alone.

The question of emigration to the alp
busied myself from day to day.

The Company
seemed terribly cumbersome,

even if I only
take the bare essentials

and primitively
wanted to dwell on the mountain.

After I realized that I
the move had already decided

when I saw the green meadows of Alp
had seen for the first time,

I was quiet.

And on 25 May came the day
of departure from the cabin.

The road was very well received,
but it still took four hours

to our strange procession
reached the pasture.

It was about noon.
I was completely exhausted.

Less of the physical effort
as the nervous tension.

Something new started. I did not know
which would bring it to me.

But my homesickness and concern
Zukun_ slowly gave way to the mine.

I began to see the beautiful pasture,
strange and dangerous.

But like everything foreign
full of secret allurements.

It was a strange feeling
unimpeded by mountains and B�u'men

a wide area
to overlook.

And it was not immediately
pleasant and liberating.

My eyes had to
get used to the length,

after a year, I
had spent in the narrow valley.

While I was on the mountain,
I made no notes.

While I dutifully stroked
every day from the calendar,

but I was not even wearing so
important events such as a hay crop.

The memory of this time
has remained fresh,

and it is not hard for me,
write about it.

The summer scent, the thundershower

and the star-sparkling evenings
I will never forget.

For the first time in my life
I was appeased.

Not satisfied or happy,
but appeased.

It was as if a hand groRe
stand still in my mind the clock.

Sometimes confuse my thoughts,

and it is, as a start to the forest
to beat me roots

and with my brain
his old, eternal thoughts to think.

Back then, in the second summer, it was
not yet come so far with me.

The boundaries were strictly drawn.

It is difficult for me,

when writing my earlier
and my new I tell them apart.

The new me,
of which I am not sure

that it does not slow
is absorbed by a gr�Keren We.

But even then
pioneered the transformation itself.

The pasture was to blame.

It was almost impossible
in the buzzing silence of the meadow

under the sky gro_en a single,
I secreted to stay.

A small, blind, stubborn life,

did not want to insert the
groRe in the community.

Once it had been my pride and joy,
to be such a life.

But on the mountain, it suddenly seemed to me
very pathetic and ridiculous.

An inflated nothing.

On 16 October
since I was back from the pasture,

I made again
regelm�Rig notes.

Almost throughout October
the weather was beautiful.

but now I took the time cheap
and doubled my wood stock.

All Saints was suddenly warm,
and I knew

that this is only the winter
could initiate.

On 1 O. December
I find a strange note:

" Time goes by so fast. "

I do not remember
they have written.

I do not Weir,
what is on that 1 O. Occurred in December

" Time goes by so fast. "

Then passed the time
really very fast?

I can not remember
and can not report.

It's not true. Time
I just seemed to pass quickly.

I believe the time is very still,
and I move in it.

Sometimes slow
and sometimes at breakneck speed.

I am doing something that drive things forward,
and I forget the time.

And then, suddenly,
is it back to me.

I'll have to get used to it.
Their indifference and omnipresence.

Since Lynx dead,
I feel that clear.

I'm sitting at the table,
and time stands still.

I can not see them,
not smell or hear,

but she surrounds me on all sides.

Their silence and stillness
is horrible.

In fact, these thoughts
without meaning.

I regret the animals
and the people

because they unasked
gewo_en be in this life.

Maybe people are
regrettable

because they have
just as much sense,

to guard against the natural course
of things to fight.

She did evil and despair
make and unlovable.

It would have been possible
to live differently.

There is no rational impulse
as love.

It makes the lover
and the beloved life more bearable.

Only, we would
to recognize in time,

that this was our only option.

Our only hope
for a better life.

For an infinite army of the dead

is the only possibility of the human
missed forever.

Time and again I have to think about it.

I can not understand why we
had to take the wrong path.

I'm just weir that it is too late.

In this autumn
has emerged a Weike crow.

You always flies a piece
behind the other

and can be alone on a tree
down, to avoid their companions.

I do not understand,
why the other crows do not like.

For me it is
a particularly beautiful bird.

But for their fellow
it is abominable.

A sad absurdity,
it does not give d�_te.

Weire a crow.

They remain seated,
until the groRe swarm departed,

and then I'll bring her
a little food.

It can not know
why is it out token.

She knows no other life.

Again and they will be geared motors
and so alone,

she fears that fewer people
than their black brothers.

Every day I wait
Weike the crow and they curl.

And she looks at me attentively
from their reddish eyes.

I can do very little for them.

My waste may extend a
Life that should not be extended.

But I want the Weike Crow lives,
and sometimes I dream

that there is a second are in the forest
and the two will find each other.

I do not believe
I only wish it very much.

Gradually, I began to
get me out of my past

and grow into a new order.

Until the weather really improved,
it had become in May

Two years had passed in the forest,
and it occurred to me

I almost never thought of
that they would find me eventually.

I decided to break up soon to the pasture.

In early June I was finally ready
I got used to the pasture.

But it was never more
as last year.

That first summer on the mountain
was gone forever.

I did not want a weaker repetition
and held me back on purpose before,

the old magic to ve_allen again.

But the Alm made it easy for me.

She had closed before me
and showed a strange face.

I often Sar as a year ago
the bank and looked out over the meadow.

She was no different than it was then
and they smelled just Suer

but I never got
in the old admiration of it.

I took no more trips groKen,

for I had last summer
my limits drawn.

It had become indifferent to me,
where the wall was.

In that summer I vergaR all that
Lynx was a dog and I a man.

I knew it, but it had
separating each meaning lost.

Lynx also had changed.

Since I am so much concerned with him

he was quiet
and did not seem to worry constantly,

I could as soon as he
departed five minutes to dissolve into thin air.

When I think about it today,
I believe

that this is the only fear groRe
his dog's life was:

to be left alone.

I had learned a lot

and understood
almost every one of his movements and sounds.

Now finally prevailed between us
a tacit understanding.

I wore Lynx to the hut

and laid him on the bench.

He was suddenly
become small and light.

And then I heard
as if from afar Bella's roar.

She was au_er in fear.

I tried to calm her.

Only then I noticed the man again.

I knew that he had to be dead.

He had been such a gro_es goal
I could not have ve_ehlen him.

I was glad that he was dead.

It would have found it difficult
having to kill an injured man.

And the life I would have him
but can not leave.

Or is it?
I do not Weir.

I did not want him
leave it on the lawn.

Not next to the dead bull
and the innocent grass.

So I grabbed him by the legs
and dragged him to the lookout point.

Where the rocks
steeply into the scree

and rhododendrons bloom in June,
lier I roll it down.

For Lynx
I picked up on the evening of a grave.

I made the deep pit,
legte lynx in,

covered him with earth
and stood firmly above the lawn.

And then I was very tired.

As tired as never before.

Then I sat down on the bench
and waited for the long night.

It was a bright starry night,

and the wind
fell down on the cold rock.

But I was colder than the wind
and did not feel cold.

At first light I got up
verlie_ with Bella and the pasture

The next day I took
my usual work again.

The month of October came,
and I harvested potatoes and fruit

The stray had to be mowed,
but that lasted only a week.

Clusively and I gave,
physically beaten and broken,

my pointless to escape
and introduced me to my thoughts.

It came out like nothing.

I want to know why
the strange man who killed my animals.

I'll never e_ahren,
and maybe it's better that way.

Now I am completely calm.

I see a little bit further.

I see
that this is not yet the end.

Everything goes on.

Taurus, pearl and lynx
there never will be again.

But something new is approaching,
and I can not escape myself to him.

The memory
the sorrow and the fear will remain

and the hard work
as long as I live.

Today, 25 February
I finish my report.

It is still not a piece of paper left.

It is now about five clock in the evening
and already so bright

I can write without lamp.

The crows have risen
screaming and circling above the forest.

If they are no longer visible,

I will go into the clearing
and the Crow Weire feed.

You already waiting for me.