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1
00:00:11,411 --> 00:00:11,612
May I sample
2
00:00:11,612 --> 00:00:11,812
May I sample the Mango M
3
00:00:11,812 --> 00:00:14,114
May I sample the Mango Mayhem?
4
00:00:15,616 --> 00:00:18,252
Now you’re gonna scream
for ice cream,
5
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:19,853
John Wick Four!
6
00:00:19,953 --> 00:00:21,522
Actually, it’s...
7
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:22,656
gelato.
8
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:27,494
[muffled screaming]
9
00:00:31,164 --> 00:00:34,234
The violence Mom won’t let me
watch is the best.
10
00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:36,270
-[tires screech]
-[crashing outside]
11
00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:37,804
Damn it!
12
00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:38,805
Whoa.
13
00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:40,207
Live violence!
14
00:00:40,307 --> 00:00:41,208
[Marge] Homie, wake up.
15
00:00:41,308 --> 00:00:42,976
There’s been a car crash!
16
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:50,083
[yawns] What’s happening?
17
00:00:50,183 --> 00:00:51,785
There’s been an accident!
18
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:53,287
Ooh, let’s go gawk!
19
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:54,988
-[grunts]
-Yeah! [giggles]
20
00:00:56,490 --> 00:01:00,594
Marge, are you using
a charger cord as a robe belt?
21
00:01:00,694 --> 00:01:03,030
Uh, well, I lost my belt
22
00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:05,599
and Bart lost this phone, so...
23
00:01:05,699 --> 00:01:08,068
What’s that mark on your sleeve?
24
00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:09,836
I used it as an oven mitt.
25
00:01:09,937 --> 00:01:13,340
My Milhouse buys me a new robe
every Christmas.
26
00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,342
Ralphie bought me
this chenille beauty
27
00:01:15,442 --> 00:01:16,810
with his tooth fairy money.
28
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:20,080
Don’t you like any of the robes
your kids bought you?
29
00:01:20,180 --> 00:01:21,915
They’ve never bought me a robe.
30
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:25,152
-The quintessential mom gift!
-[gasps]
-Un-frigging-believable.
31
00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,253
[both groan]
32
00:01:26,353 --> 00:01:28,755
My kids give me homemade gifts,
33
00:01:28,855 --> 00:01:30,624
like hand turkeys
34
00:01:30,724 --> 00:01:32,726
and macaroni-covered...
35
00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:34,227
[stammers] stuff.
36
00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:37,631
Sounds like they’re just giving
you their art class crap.
37
00:01:37,731 --> 00:01:38,899
Feel this.
38
00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:41,768
I like the thoughtful,
artistic gifts my kids--
39
00:01:41,868 --> 00:01:44,738
[gasps]
Oh, my God, that’s plush!
40
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:47,140
[gasps] My robe is fine.
41
00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:49,743
It’s just a little worn
in spots.
42
00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:52,646
Uh, one big spot in the back.
43
00:01:52,746 --> 00:01:54,581
Aah! The top of my crack!
44
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:55,983
[gasps] Oh! Here! Come here!
45
00:01:56,083 --> 00:01:57,084
Ooh! Mm.
46
00:01:57,184 --> 00:01:58,752
[gasping]
47
00:02:01,521 --> 00:02:02,990
♪ ♪
48
00:02:03,090 --> 00:02:04,925
It’s magical.
49
00:02:05,025 --> 00:02:06,426
But it smells like
burning flip-flops.
50
00:02:06,526 --> 00:02:08,895
[gasps] Ow! My flip-flops!
51
00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:11,732
Careful!
Live wire on the ground!
52
00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:13,266
Whoa. Thank you, Homer.
53
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:15,802
Aw, you da man.
54
00:02:17,371 --> 00:02:18,939
Did you hear that?
55
00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:20,974
Kirk said I was da man.
56
00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:24,211
I mean, it sounded stupid,
the way he said it, but still...
57
00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:27,214
Well, uh, if you want
to be "da man" for everybody,
58
00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:30,317
you should post a warning about
that live wire on Alarmist.
59
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:32,986
It’s this app that alerts
neighbors to local dangers.
60
00:02:33,086 --> 00:02:34,655
Downloading now.
61
00:02:34,755 --> 00:02:37,057
[Lenny]
You film dangerous stuff
and post it.
62
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,592
You know, traffic accidents,
63
00:02:38,692 --> 00:02:40,661
nighttime animals out
during the day.
64
00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:42,996
Uh, hello.
This is Homer Simpson.
65
00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:44,598
Username, uh...
66
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:46,166
The Simp.
67
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:48,935
There’s a live wire sparking
on Evergreen Terrace.
68
00:02:49,036 --> 00:02:50,671
Risk of electrocution,
69
00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:52,673
1,000%.
70
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:54,541
♪ ♪
71
00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:55,509
[gasping]
72
00:02:55,609 --> 00:02:56,810
A thousand percent?
73
00:02:56,910 --> 00:02:59,046
My baby could’ve played
with that wire!
74
00:02:59,146 --> 00:03:01,348
He ain’t born,
but he’s ’bout to be.
75
00:03:01,448 --> 00:03:04,518
Congratulations, you’re now part
of the Alarmy Army.
76
00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:07,921
Hey, I can barely read my name
without my cheaters.
77
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:10,457
How do I get a bigger font
like these guys?
78
00:03:10,557 --> 00:03:13,060
Um, those are
the top alarmers on the app.
79
00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,495
You want your name
in a readable font size?
80
00:03:15,595 --> 00:03:17,497
You better learn
how to spread fear.
81
00:03:17,597 --> 00:03:20,500
I’ll do it. I’ll get to the top
of this leaderboard
82
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,203
if it’s the most useless thing
I ever do!
83
00:03:23,303 --> 00:03:26,373
Bart, we need to talk
about Mom’s birthday present.
84
00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:28,408
Finishing it as we speak.
85
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,810
Ta-da!
86
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:34,047
Uh, it might be time
to retire the pasta art genre.
87
00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:36,450
What?
In my vital bucatini phase?
88
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:40,020
You heard what those judgy women
said about our presents.
89
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:42,522
We need to buy Mom a present
this year.
90
00:03:42,622 --> 00:03:43,623
Where are we gonna get money?
91
00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,792
Otto stopped paying
for clean urine.
92
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:48,361
Hmm. Mr. Flanders is generous.
93
00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:51,264
I’ve sold him
so many magazine subscriptions.
94
00:03:51,364 --> 00:03:53,366
Why Cat Fancy?
95
00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:56,036
His cat isn’t even that fancy.
96
00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:57,404
[humming]
97
00:03:57,504 --> 00:03:59,072
Yo, Flan-man. We’re trying
to make some scratch
98
00:03:59,172 --> 00:04:00,440
for our mom’s birthday gift.
99
00:04:00,540 --> 00:04:02,442
You need any help
cleaning this mess up?
100
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,711
Sorry. I always keep
my grass trimmed.
101
00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:05,879
You know the old saying--
102
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:08,215
"the lawn is the mustache
of the house."
103
00:04:08,315 --> 00:04:09,716
Aw, we get it.
104
00:04:09,816 --> 00:04:11,785
We just thought
Mom deserved something nice.
105
00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,954
But if you don’t think so,
106
00:04:14,054 --> 00:04:15,388
mm, that’s cool.
107
00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:16,790
Now, well, hold on!
108
00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:20,260
If, uh, you clean those two
leaves on my sidewalk up,
109
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:21,595
I’ll give you...
110
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:23,230
$44.
111
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,464
-Both leaves?
-[grunts]
112
00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:26,199
-Ow!
-Deal.
113
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:28,969
This store has everything.
114
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:30,170
[gasps]
115
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:33,140
This will make Mom
feel cozy and loved.
116
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:36,076
And it’ll put a sock in the yaps
of those gossipy hens.
117
00:04:36,176 --> 00:04:38,678
I’m gonna ignore
the problematic "hens"
118
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,947
because I support the sentiment.
119
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:43,383
-Whoa.
-Whoa.
120
00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,285
Is it a toy?
121
00:04:45,385 --> 00:04:47,721
Yes. But it’s also...
122
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:49,055
gear.
123
00:04:49,156 --> 00:04:51,558
It’s got a pen
that’s actually a tape recorder,
124
00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:53,960
an eavesdropping device
that lets you hear conversations
125
00:04:54,060 --> 00:04:54,995
from miles away.
126
00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:56,830
And when you get
in a tight spot,
127
00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:59,432
sour gummy cyanide capsules!
128
00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:02,202
This could change everything.
129
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:05,705
Deep down,
I know I’m the dingus!
130
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:07,641
[crying]
131
00:05:07,741 --> 00:05:09,843
[crying replays on pen]
132
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:11,111
Give me your lunch money
133
00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:13,613
or the whole playground
hears you blubber.
134
00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:15,081
You, too, bow tie.
135
00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:19,653
The Eavesdropper
could be so useful.
136
00:05:20,921 --> 00:05:24,124
Okay, the meeting of the cool
girls has been called to order.
137
00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:26,526
It’s been decided
that the new cool thing
138
00:05:26,626 --> 00:05:29,029
is to wear earmuffs
in warm weather,
139
00:05:29,129 --> 00:05:31,031
so don’t tell any randos--
140
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:32,866
-[gasps]
-Hey, guys!
141
00:05:32,966 --> 00:05:34,301
[chuckling knowingly]
142
00:05:34,401 --> 00:05:36,403
[gasps] Now Lisa’s cool, too!
143
00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:38,572
And there’s nothing
we can do about it!
144
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,707
[crying]
145
00:05:40,807 --> 00:05:42,209
[chuckles] Yes.
146
00:05:42,309 --> 00:05:44,544
Cry, Sherri, cry.
147
00:05:44,644 --> 00:05:47,047
Okay, just thinking out loud--
148
00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:50,984
this kit is the same price
as the robe...
149
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,153
[gasps] Are you suggesting
150
00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:54,621
-that we--
-You know I am!
151
00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:56,323
[sighs] Say yes. Come on, Lis.
152
00:05:56,423 --> 00:05:58,391
I need two keys
to launch this missile.
153
00:05:58,491 --> 00:06:01,094
Mom has never really been
a gift person.
154
00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:03,997
True.
She’s more into stuff like hugs
155
00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:05,565
and seeing us happy!
156
00:06:05,665 --> 00:06:08,902
But we can’t just buy a spy kit
for us and nothing for Mom.
157
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:10,804
[stammers] Bart?
158
00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:14,574
Bart, we can’t do this.
159
00:06:14,674 --> 00:06:16,977
Would you like to apply
for a Bullseye credit card?
160
00:06:17,077 --> 00:06:18,178
I’m eight.
161
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:20,247
Yeah, you won’t get it.
But if you apply,
162
00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,415
you get a free Bullseye
ironing board cover.
163
00:06:22,515 --> 00:06:24,084
[gasps] We could buy the spy kit
164
00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:26,086
and give Mom
the ironing board cover!
165
00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:29,522
That’s like giving her
a whole new ironing board!
166
00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,191
Give me an application!
167
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:33,360
We’ll give her
two ironing board covers!
168
00:06:33,460 --> 00:06:34,694
[group]
♪ Happy birthday ♪
169
00:06:34,794 --> 00:06:37,330
♪ To you! ♪
170
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:39,866
Uh, open my present first.
171
00:06:39,966 --> 00:06:40,901
I got to hit the streets.
172
00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:42,636
I have citizens to alarm.
173
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,772
Another charm
for my charm bracelet!
174
00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:48,775
That bracelet was
the smartest investment ever.
175
00:06:48,875 --> 00:06:50,610
No matter what the occasion,
176
00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:52,112
I always know what you need--
177
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:53,947
another charm.
178
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:56,082
You know me so well.
179
00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:58,919
I better
after however many years.
180
00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:00,420
Open mine next!
181
00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:04,758
Oh. An ironing board cover.
182
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:07,160
Yeah, ’cause,
you know, you iron.
183
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:08,828
I sure do.
184
00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:10,931
Open mine.
It’s in the Bullseye bag!
185
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,600
Hmm. Such clever wrapping.
[chuckles]
186
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:16,937
Ah, it’s another
ironing board cover.
187
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,204
What do you get for the woman
188
00:07:18,305 --> 00:07:20,373
who has only one
ironing board cover?
189
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:22,208
Thank you. Both of you.
190
00:07:22,309 --> 00:07:23,610
I love them.
191
00:07:24,577 --> 00:07:25,879
I got to hit the road.
192
00:07:25,979 --> 00:07:28,448
If I find just three more things
to warn people about,
193
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:31,551
I’ll move ahead of Cautionary
Gale and Cry Wolfcastle
194
00:07:31,651 --> 00:07:32,719
on the leaderboard.
195
00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:33,954
We’ll help clean up!
196
00:07:34,054 --> 00:07:34,955
[grunts]
197
00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:36,856
No! I’ll do it.
198
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,993
You guys have...
done so much for me.
199
00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:46,833
[sighs deeply]
200
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:50,270
[g
201
00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:50,971
[groans]
202
00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:52,372
Enjoying your present, huh?
203
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:53,940
Don’t play with it all day!
204
00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:55,208
[grumbles]
205
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:58,345
We’ll know soon enough
who broke this va--
206
00:07:58,445 --> 00:08:00,680
[gasps, groans]
207
00:08:00,780 --> 00:08:02,349
[Bart]
Yellow Sparrow,
this is Slingshot.
208
00:08:02,449 --> 00:08:04,250
Prepare
for face-to-face discussion.
209
00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:06,519
Roger that. Face is prepared.
210
00:08:06,619 --> 00:08:08,588
This spy kit is great!
211
00:08:08,688 --> 00:08:12,092
All the secrets of this house
are being laid bare.
212
00:08:12,192 --> 00:08:14,394
And Mom loves her present.
213
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,563
She can’t stop muttering
about it.
214
00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:18,198
We rule. Over.
215
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:19,766
Roger that. Over.
216
00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:23,937
Inappropriate billboard
near Noiseland Arcade.
217
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:25,939
Guaranteed danger of corruption.
218
00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,540
Keep children away!
219
00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,776
-[phone chimes]
-Hmm. Whoa, whoa.
220
00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:33,179
Thanks for warning us
about the vulgar wordplay, Simp!
221
00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,282
"Itch, please."
222
00:08:36,383 --> 00:08:38,218
Wait, I get it!
223
00:08:38,318 --> 00:08:39,953
"Itch" rhymes with "bi--"
224
00:08:40,053 --> 00:08:42,489
Uh, Mom hates that word.
Trust me.
225
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:47,060
One more post
and I’ll be top five.
226
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:48,395
Homer.
227
00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:50,330
Religious fanatic
running through town.
228
00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:51,598
Possibly from murder scene.
229
00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:52,999
Avoid outdoors.
230
00:08:53,099 --> 00:08:54,667
[phone chimes]
231
00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:56,236
-I did it.
-Fanatic!
232
00:08:56,336 --> 00:08:57,804
I’m number five!
233
00:08:57,904 --> 00:08:59,773
I’m better than everyone!
234
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,207
♪ ♪
235
00:09:03,843 --> 00:09:06,379
-[static]
-[Frink] Uh-uh-uh.
Your name is not "Frink."
236
00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:09,282
You are "Frink’s Monster,"
you see?
237
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:12,285
[Frink’s Monster]
[growls] Frink sad.
238
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,220
[Frink]
No, Frink’s Monster is sad!
239
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,122
What is wrong with you?!
240
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:18,658
[Moe]
All right, one of youse rats
has been eating pool chalk
241
00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:21,161
and leaving chalky pellets
all over the place.
242
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:22,662
No, no,
don’t look at each other!
243
00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:24,564
Look at me! Hey! Steve!
244
00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:26,566
-[static]
-[Flanders] Oh, hey, Marge.
245
00:09:26,666 --> 00:09:29,235
-[Marge] Hi, Ned.
-Ooh, that’s Mom!
246
00:09:29,335 --> 00:09:31,071
What a party yesterday.
247
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:33,973
I don’t usually take my water
on the rocks.
248
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,408
I was buzzing all night.
249
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:37,710
Yeah. It was... fun.
250
00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:40,146
-[crying]
-[Lisa] Oh.
251
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,715
Whoa. I didn’t mean
to bring on a peeper-puddle.
252
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:43,983
What’s wrong?
253
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,186
[Marge]
It’s silly. I-I’m embarrassed
254
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:49,689
that my feelings were hurt
by a stupid birthday gift.
255
00:09:49,789 --> 00:09:52,392
[Flanders]
Oh, now, feelings aren’t stupid
256
00:09:52,492 --> 00:09:54,494
Some of them are evil,
but they’re not stupid.
257
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:57,063
It’s just... on my one day,
258
00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:59,199
I’m barely an afterthought.
259
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:02,368
It’s like they don’t think of m
as a person.
260
00:10:02,469 --> 00:10:03,670
[sighs]
261
00:10:05,171 --> 00:10:07,507
I don’t get it.
Why is she so sad?
262
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:10,176
Bart, she’s feeling unseen.
263
00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:11,544
What? I always see her.
264
00:10:11,644 --> 00:10:13,513
She’s in my phone contacts
three times--
265
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:15,615
under "Mom," "Mommy"
and "Sandwich."
266
00:10:15,715 --> 00:10:18,818
She does so many things
that we take for granted.
267
00:10:18,918 --> 00:10:21,321
Imagine how we would feel
if she...
268
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:23,957
half-tushied our birthdays.
269
00:10:24,057 --> 00:10:27,160
What? I’d be fine if she only...
270
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:29,362
[groaning]
271
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,030
[sighs]
272
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,866
We suck. Over.
273
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,001
Roger that. Over.
274
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,470
As of this morning,
275
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:40,907
I am number one on the
leaderboard of the Alarmist app.
276
00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:42,208
[gasps] Look at that!
277
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,344
What? The broken sprinkler?
278
00:10:44,444 --> 00:10:45,612
We need to warn people!
279
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:47,113
It could cause a sinkhole
280
00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:49,048
or activate a gremlin!
281
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,217
This is your number one Alarmy
282
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:54,087
with a warning that a geyser
of water is pouring onto--
283
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:55,488
-[phone chimes]
-Wha...?
284
00:10:55,588 --> 00:10:58,892
Hey! Someone named Silver Bullet
already reported a...
285
00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:01,628
"vertical tsunami at the park."
286
00:11:01,728 --> 00:11:04,230
Whoa! That’s good mongering.
287
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:05,398
I got scooped?
288
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:08,034
Silver Bullet
is now Alarmy number one.
289
00:11:08,134 --> 00:11:09,936
What?! Who is this guy?
290
00:11:10,036 --> 00:11:14,007
Those fat fingers are too slow
for the Silver Bullet!
291
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:16,242
Silver Bullet,
your days are numbered!
292
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,411
Tell me something
my doctor hasn’t.
293
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:21,247
You smell like old lady.
294
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:23,016
So do you.
295
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:26,252
I smell like a lot of things.
296
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,188
We have to
get Mom a new present.
297
00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:29,589
Something meaningful.
298
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:33,426
So, let’s make a list
of everything we know about Mom.
299
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,695
Yes. Great idea.
300
00:11:36,629 --> 00:11:38,064
Mm...
301
00:11:38,164 --> 00:11:40,700
Hmm. Her first name is
actually Margaret.
302
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,502
Good. Write that down.
303
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:43,770
Hmm.
304
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:49,175
Ooh, I know. She loves coming
to my jazz recitals.
305
00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:50,577
Uh, no, she doesn’t.
306
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:53,179
She hides a copy of
People magazine in the program.
307
00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:54,847
Oh. Ugh!
308
00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:57,183
Why is this so hard?
309
00:11:57,283 --> 00:11:59,953
We should know the woman
who gave birth to us.
310
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:01,621
Maybe she’s unknowable.
311
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:03,423
What if we just give her
the spy kit
312
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,959
and breakfast in bed
for the rest of her life?
313
00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,094
Or, you know that trunk
314
00:12:08,194 --> 00:12:10,530
where Mom keeps all her
memories and stuff?
315
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:14,234
What if we use the spy kit
to break into it?
316
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:17,036
Ooh, welcome to the dark side.
317
00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:18,571
♪ ♪
318
00:12:19,806 --> 00:12:21,040
[Lisa]
Huh.
319
00:12:21,140 --> 00:12:22,642
[gasps] Here we are.
320
00:12:23,943 --> 00:12:26,145
I don’t know
if these lock-picking tools
321
00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:27,614
are even going to work.
322
00:12:27,714 --> 00:12:31,951
I mean, this is just a toy...
[gasps]
323
00:12:32,051 --> 00:12:36,723
Oh. Now I’m concerned about
those gummy cyanide capsules.
324
00:12:36,823 --> 00:12:38,825
Mom’s birth announcement.
325
00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:42,829
Oh, her name is Marjorie,
not Margaret.
326
00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:45,698
We officially
know nothing about her.
327
00:12:45,798 --> 00:12:47,533
Hmm.
328
00:12:47,634 --> 00:12:50,036
Mom had a parrot named Petey?
329
00:12:53,072 --> 00:12:56,676
Oh, they were best friends, like
me and Santa’s Little Helper.
330
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:59,212
-[whining]
-Not now, boy. Busy.
331
00:12:59,312 --> 00:13:01,214
[gasps]
Look at this one.
332
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:04,651
[Bart] Oh, Mom’s parents
must’ve given Petey away.
333
00:13:04,751 --> 00:13:06,486
Hey, we just learned something
about her.
334
00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,388
Grandma was a jerk-ass.
335
00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:10,823
Wait. Parrots live for,
like, 80 years.
336
00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:13,926
Maybe we could find Petey,
and then reunite Mom
337
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,728
with her long-lost friend.
338
00:13:15,828 --> 00:13:17,363
That would be like
getting her a robe
339
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,232
that tells you
it wants crackers.
340
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:20,967
How do we find this lady?
341
00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:23,169
[Lisa] Well, we need to go
to North Townsburg.
342
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:25,171
Oh, that place is sketchy.
343
00:13:25,271 --> 00:13:28,141
Milhouse’s dad was a sign
spinner for a meth clinic there.
344
00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:30,643
But let’s do it, for Mar-ge-dy!
345
00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:32,912
-Marjorie.
-Whatever.
346
00:13:35,415 --> 00:13:38,651
Oh, Townsburg is
three hours away?!
347
00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:41,054
Fine. I’ll just kick
the seat in front of me
348
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:44,057
until that little screw
falls out. [grunting]
349
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,925
That is so rude.
350
00:13:46,025 --> 00:13:47,360
[grunting]
351
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:50,196
Well, you have to get closer
to the screw, like this.
352
00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:51,964
[both grunting]
353
00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:54,067
Great.
354
00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:56,736
[both groani
355
00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:58,671
[both groaning]
356
00:13:58,771 --> 00:14:01,074
Oh, this place is depressing.
357
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,343
Isn’t that the corner
where Nic Cage went crazy?
358
00:14:03,443 --> 00:14:05,278
Yep. There’s the statue.
359
00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:08,948
[gasps]
There’s the mechanic’s shop.
360
00:14:10,416 --> 00:14:11,684
Let’s do this.
361
00:14:11,784 --> 00:14:14,020
Hey, grease stains,
seen this bird?
362
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,156
Yeah, I remember him.
That’s Krista’s bird.
363
00:14:17,256 --> 00:14:18,624
He in some kind of trouble?
364
00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:20,126
We’ll ask the questions.
365
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,795
What’s the skinny on
this Krista character?
366
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:24,864
Well, she owns the craft store
down the block.
367
00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:26,532
She also sells liquor and weed.
368
00:14:26,632 --> 00:14:28,368
-Let’s go.
-Don’t leave town.
369
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,303
But my niece’s wedding
is tomorrow.
370
00:14:30,403 --> 00:14:32,372
I said don’t leave town.
371
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:36,476
Fine. Hey, Shirl, it’s Vince.
I can’t make it.
372
00:14:36,576 --> 00:14:39,645
I don’t know, some kid
told me I can’t leave town.
373
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:42,148
I’ve got to get back
to being Alarmy number one.
374
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:45,218
Gotta warn people about...
something.
375
00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:48,554
[gasps] Death from above.
376
00:14:48,654 --> 00:14:50,690
Falling branches
in Springfield Park!
377
00:14:50,790 --> 00:14:53,726
-Stay away.
-[phones chiming]
378
00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:56,229
-We have to get out of here!
-I did it.
379
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:57,930
I’m Alarmy number one!
380
00:14:58,030 --> 00:15:01,067
Not for long,
you toad-faced beanbag.
381
00:15:01,167 --> 00:15:05,538
I will cut you into tiny pieces
like my son’s pancakes.
382
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:08,141
I’m going to eat you up
and crap you out
383
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,243
like my son’s pancakes.
384
00:15:10,343 --> 00:15:11,477
[grumbles]
385
00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:15,148
The air at Springfield Park
is full of pollen.
386
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:17,750
Individuals with lungs
should avoid the area.
387
00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,218
[groans]
388
00:15:19,318 --> 00:15:22,288
Lifeless bodies at the park.
Possible gas leak.
389
00:15:22,388 --> 00:15:25,057
Demented man throwing objects
at the duck pond.
390
00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:26,793
Chemical air attack
at the play yard.
391
00:15:26,893 --> 00:15:29,195
UFOs hovering over picnic area.
392
00:15:29,295 --> 00:15:32,465
String-guided dragons, most
likely time travelers attack...
393
00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:34,801
I saw the kites first,
ya big galoot!
394
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:35,935
[rumbling]
395
00:15:36,035 --> 00:15:37,570
[both cry out]
396
00:15:37,670 --> 00:15:38,871
What happened?
397
00:15:38,971 --> 00:15:41,808
The earth couldn’t support
your giant ass.
398
00:15:41,908 --> 00:15:43,443
Maybe Satan heard your voice
399
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:45,711
and decided to fast-track you
to hell.
400
00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:48,080
Okay, we both got one in.
401
00:15:48,181 --> 00:15:50,316
How are we getting
out of this sinkhole?
402
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,585
I dropped my phone.
Do you have yours?
403
00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:55,521
No. Just start shouting.
Someone will hear us.
404
00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:57,390
-Help!
-Down here!
405
00:15:57,490 --> 00:15:59,425
Save me, not her!
406
00:15:59,525 --> 00:16:02,295
[girl]
Hurry, the dragons are coming!
407
00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:05,531
Oh, yeah, Petey.
He was smart as a whip.
408
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:08,768
Could imitate anything:
political figures of the day,
409
00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:11,604
the "You Lose" horn
from Price Is Right.
410
00:16:11,704 --> 00:16:13,773
So many times I thought
contestants lost
411
00:16:13,873 --> 00:16:15,141
when they hadn’t.
412
00:16:15,241 --> 00:16:18,478
Why are you talking
about him in the past tense?
413
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:22,081
Oh, I left his cage open
by mistake and he flew away.
414
00:16:22,181 --> 00:16:24,917
Last I heard, he joined
a flock of wild parrots.
415
00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:28,488
Oh. I guess we came
all this way for nothing.
416
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:29,922
Stay in town.
417
00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:31,791
But my daughter’s wedding is...
418
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:35,127
[sighs]
Shirl? Bad news.
419
00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:37,463
We failed Mom again.
420
00:16:37,563 --> 00:16:39,966
We are losers.
421
00:16:40,066 --> 00:16:43,469
[voice imitates
The Price is Right horn]
422
00:16:43,569 --> 00:16:45,137
Bart, it’s Petey!
423
00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:47,306
How can we lure him down here?
424
00:16:47,406 --> 00:16:49,175
Uh, uh, I’ve got it.
425
00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:52,178
[Marge’s voice] Bart,
are you secretly recording me?
426
00:16:52,278 --> 00:16:54,380
I’m on hold to talk
about our water bill.
427
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,415
I’m sorry, no,
I’m not talking to you.
428
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,684
I’m talking to my annoying son.
429
00:16:58,784 --> 00:17:00,152
-Yes!
-Got him!
430
00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:01,420
[Petey] Annoying son.
[squawks]
431
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:02,755
[Agnes] Hello?!
432
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,224
Can’t any of you
idiots hear us?!
433
00:17:05,324 --> 00:17:08,561
There’s no one to save us.
We scared everyone away.
434
00:17:08,661 --> 00:17:11,230
-Isn’t that ironic?
-I guess.
435
00:17:11,330 --> 00:17:13,599
No, I’m asking.
I don’t know what ironic means.
436
00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:15,768
Why did we get so crazy?
437
00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,436
I was doing a public service.
438
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,205
I warned everyone
that broken sprinkler
439
00:17:19,305 --> 00:17:20,606
would cause a sinkhole.
440
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:23,543
Bull-scat. You were trying to
move up the leaderboard.
441
00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:26,712
-We both were.
-Now we’re stuck down here.
442
00:17:26,812 --> 00:17:29,749
[sighs]
I miss the surface world.
443
00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:32,018
Hey, you gotta share that!
444
00:17:32,118 --> 00:17:34,220
We both need strength
to fight off CHUDs.
445
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:37,790
Hell no.
My Werther’s, my choice.
446
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:40,560
-[grumbling]
-[choking]
447
00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,228
Yeah, yeah,
you got candy in there.
448
00:17:42,328 --> 00:17:43,396
Stop showing off.
449
00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:46,432
Are you choking?
Hang on, I’ll save you.
450
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:48,534
Wait, is this irony?
451
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:52,238
Ow. Ow! Okay, I’m doing it.
452
00:17:52,338 --> 00:17:53,472
[grunts]
453
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:54,974
[gasps] I can breathe!
454
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:56,075
[sighs]
455
00:17:56,175 --> 00:17:57,510
Simpson,
456
00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:00,313
instead of mongering fear,
you mongered...
457
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:02,448
Life itself.
458
00:18:02,548 --> 00:18:04,650
-Thank you.
-[gasps]
459
00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,819
This is the feeling I was after.
460
00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,754
Not some stupid leaderboard.
461
00:18:08,854 --> 00:18:10,256
I’m gonna help you
get out of here.
462
00:18:10,356 --> 00:18:12,425
Step in my hands,
I’ll boost you up.
463
00:18:12,525 --> 00:18:13,993
[grunts]
464
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:17,697
Oh, there’s so much
to grab on to.
465
00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:22,902
I’ll tell everyone
you’re down there.
466
00:18:23,002 --> 00:18:26,973
Which will make me
Alarmy number one. Suck it!
467
00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:29,709
Hairless ground hippo stuck
in sinkhole.
468
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:32,812
She’s horrible.
469
00:18:32,912 --> 00:18:36,415
Mom, we have one more
birthday surprise for you.
470
00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:37,917
Oh. Really?
471
00:18:38,017 --> 00:18:42,521
We tracked down
your best friend.
472
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:45,458
-Petey?
-Petey?
473
00:18:45,558 --> 00:18:47,760
How-how is this happening?
474
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:49,595
How is this happening?!
475
00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:51,897
How is this happening?!
How is this happening?!
476
00:18:51,998 --> 00:18:57,269
Aah! Get it off!
Get it off before he-- Oh!
477
00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:58,471
-Ew.
-Ugh.
478
00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:00,373
-Ow! Ow!
-[Lisa] Bart, do something!
479
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,274
[grunts]
480
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:03,275
Sorry.
481
00:19:03,376 --> 00:19:04,644
We thought he loved you.
482
00:19:04,744 --> 00:19:06,479
This is how he shows love.
483
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:08,981
By grooming me
and regurgitating on me.
484
00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,883
I could never have friends over,
485
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,151
he was so possessive.
486
00:19:12,251 --> 00:19:13,386
Mine!
487
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:15,855
[squawking angrily]
488
00:19:23,796 --> 00:19:25,297
So why did you even get him?
489
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,867
I didn’t.
I wanted a kitten.
490
00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:30,036
Our neighbor was
giving away their parrot.
491
00:19:30,136 --> 00:19:34,140
Since Petey can meow, my dad
decided he was close enough.
492
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:35,508
[Petey] Meow.
493
00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:38,044
-You’re nothing like a kitten!
-[all yell]
494
00:19:38,144 --> 00:19:40,980
Don’t worry, we’ll
take him back to Townsburg.
495
00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:42,648
He’s part of a wild flock there.
496
00:19:42,748 --> 00:19:45,217
You went all the way
to Townsburg?
497
00:19:45,317 --> 00:19:47,520
We wanted to get
you something, you know,
498
00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,722
personal for your birthday.
499
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:53,059
Yeah. We did not make friends
on the bus ride home.
500
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:54,727
Petey is kind of racist.
501
00:19:54,827 --> 00:19:57,797
Well, that’s just...
[crying]
502
00:19:57,897 --> 00:19:59,031
We’re sorry.
503
00:19:59,131 --> 00:20:01,067
We didn’t mean to
re-traumatize you
504
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:03,402
with your childhood
nightmare bird.
505
00:20:03,502 --> 00:20:05,871
My wonderful babies!
506
00:20:05,971 --> 00:20:08,441
You went to all that trouble
for me.
507
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:12,111
I wasn’t an afterthought,
I was a thought.
508
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:15,548
Well, yeah, ’cause... you know,
509
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:19,085
we see you as a person.
510
00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:23,222
We really do.
Our favorite person.
511
00:20:23,322 --> 00:20:25,491
Oh, that is so...
512
00:20:25,591 --> 00:20:27,727
-[crunch]
-Ow!
513
00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:30,663
You little...
514
00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:34,233
Who wants to help Mommy
abandon Petey in Townsburg?
515
00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:35,735
[both] We do!
516
00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:37,737
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
517
00:20:37,837 --> 00:20:39,739
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
518
00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:41,741
and TOYOTA.
519
00:20:41,841 --> 00:20:43,876
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
520
00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:46,378
-[
521
00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:46,579
-[tires screec
522
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:46,779
-[tires screech]
-[cras
523
00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,147
-[tires screech]
-[crashing]
524
00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:48,781
[concerned m
525
00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:50,349
[concerned murmuring]
526
00:20:50,449 --> 00:20:53,519
Marge, what a beautiful robe.
527
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:55,287
Is that terry cloth?
528
00:20:55,387 --> 00:20:58,858
French terry, from the Terry
province of France.
529
00:20:58,958 --> 00:21:00,860
[excited murmuring]
530
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:02,361
My kids got it for me.
531
00:21:02,461 --> 00:21:05,364
I just threw it on to see
what that noise was.
532
00:21:05,464 --> 00:21:08,434
I think it came from over there.
533
00:21:08,534 --> 00:21:11,203
Look at the fullness
in that sleeve.
534
00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:14,440
What was that sound?
I don’t see anything.
535
00:21:14,540 --> 00:21:17,877
Well, it’s a mystery.
We may never know.
536
00:21:17,977 --> 00:21:19,512
-Look at how it moves.
-Poetry in fabric.
537
00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:20,646
You better work.
538
00:21:22,214 --> 00:21:24,216
[Bart laughs]
539
00:21:24,316 --> 00:21:26,619
Mission accomplished. Over.
540
00:21:26,719 --> 00:21:28,554
[both] Roger that. Over.
541
00:21:28,654 --> 00:21:30,556
Shh!
38242
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