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1
00:00:48,012 --> 00:00:51,072
- Hello?
2
00:00:57,755 --> 00:01:00,849
That leak we had has been fixed.
3
00:01:00,958 --> 00:01:04,758
So now that we've dealt with the situation,
we can keep moving forward, right?
4
00:01:06,964 --> 00:01:08,864
Yes, of course.
5
00:01:08,966 --> 00:01:10,991
I thought so.
6
00:01:12,536 --> 00:01:15,437
What was that about?
7
00:01:15,539 --> 00:01:18,030
Nothing.
8
00:01:18,142 --> 00:01:20,042
Go back to sleep.
9
00:01:26,283 --> 00:01:28,808
You gotta get out there.
They're starting to get fidgety.
10
00:01:28,919 --> 00:01:32,047
What were you so nervous about? I mean,
you set this up, right? You vouched for us?
11
00:01:32,156 --> 00:01:34,147
Yes, but you don't
know them the way I do.
12
00:01:34,258 --> 00:01:37,455
If they think for one second you're
not legit, they will turn on you.
13
00:01:37,561 --> 00:01:39,461
And God help you if that happens.
14
00:01:39,563 --> 00:01:42,293
That's it. We can't risk
it. I'm pulling the plug.
15
00:01:42,399 --> 00:01:44,560
No, no.
16
00:01:44,668 --> 00:01:47,899
I've never turned down an assignment,
and I'm not gonna start now.
17
00:01:48,005 --> 00:01:51,736
Just tell me one thing.
Have they had their snack?
18
00:01:57,081 --> 00:01:59,481
No, just juice boxes.
19
00:02:01,418 --> 00:02:04,046
You gotta be kiddin me.
20
00:02:04,154 --> 00:02:06,281
All right. Okay.
21
00:02:06,390 --> 00:02:12,158
And now lets give a great big Gold
Coast Elementary School welcome to, uh...
22
00:02:12,262 --> 00:02:16,255
Goldie the Safety Eagle!
23
00:02:19,536 --> 00:02:22,164
- I say, there's an eagle in the house.
24
00:02:22,272 --> 00:02:25,400
I say, there's an eagle-
25
00:02:25,509 --> 00:02:27,773
Pa-cow,
pa-cow.
26
00:02:30,647 --> 00:02:34,174
So what brings us here
today, O great Safety Eagle?
27
00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:38,846
Yeah, well, I'm, uh, here to
recruit some junior investigators.
28
00:02:38,956 --> 00:02:42,517
Me!
29
00:02:42,626 --> 00:02:45,288
Ah, now, I'm not talking about
investigating your parents.
30
00:02:45,396 --> 00:02:47,330
Although, if your daddy got no job...
31
00:02:47,431 --> 00:02:50,298
and wearing a $20,000
Rolex, give us a call.
32
00:02:50,401 --> 00:02:52,596
- Hey, Trent. Watching television sure is fun
-
33
00:02:52,703 --> 00:02:55,399
That guy in the chicken suit?
Isn't that your step dad?
34
00:02:55,506 --> 00:02:57,531
...make sure the cord
is not torn or frayed.
35
00:03:00,144 --> 00:03:02,271
If the Safety Eagle
were to plug that in...
36
00:03:02,379 --> 00:03:04,279
he would get a nasty shock.
37
00:03:04,381 --> 00:03:07,612
Plug it in! Plug it in!
38
00:03:07,718 --> 00:03:10,118
Damn demon kids.
39
00:03:10,220 --> 00:03:13,280
Space heaters keep us
warm in the winter...
40
00:03:13,390 --> 00:03:15,984
but they, too, can
be very dangerous if-
41
00:03:22,332 --> 00:03:25,665
What-
42
00:03:25,769 --> 00:03:28,294
- Oh!
43
00:03:28,405 --> 00:03:31,431
Oh. Oh. Whoo!
44
00:03:32,676 --> 00:03:35,236
Oh!
45
00:03:45,589 --> 00:03:47,955
Couldn't you have at least
taken off that chicken suit?
46
00:03:48,058 --> 00:03:51,323
First of all, its an eagle suit.
47
00:03:51,428 --> 00:03:54,261
And unfortunately, I had no
choice. The zipper melted.
48
00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:57,458
- What's wrong with you anyway?
- Ryan and the guys saw you.
49
00:03:57,568 --> 00:03:59,502
- So?
- So its embarrassing.
50
00:03:59,603 --> 00:04:03,596
Ryan's dad sells shrimp
out the trunk of his car.
51
00:04:03,707 --> 00:04:05,800
He's the one that should be embarrassed.
52
00:04:05,909 --> 00:04:08,673
- Well, at least he doesn't have to do it dressed like a chicken.
- Eagle.
53
00:04:08,779 --> 00:04:10,804
I'm an eagle.
54
00:04:10,914 --> 00:04:14,975
An eagles a majestic
bird. It deserves respect.
55
00:04:18,589 --> 00:04:22,719
So those stories you used to tell me- The
things you did, all those guys you put in jail-
56
00:04:22,826 --> 00:04:25,920
- You gave it up for this?
- No.
57
00:04:27,998 --> 00:04:29,863
I gave it up for her.
58
00:04:37,441 --> 00:04:39,841
Hi, honey. Hi, baby!
59
00:04:39,943 --> 00:04:43,174
What happened to my little birdie?
60
00:04:43,280 --> 00:04:45,771
- Eagle too proud to talk about it.
61
00:04:45,883 --> 00:04:48,317
Well, come on inside
and let me take a look.
62
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:50,409
- Hey, baby.
- Hi, honey.
63
00:04:50,521 --> 00:04:52,716
- What's up?
- Oh, I almost forgot.
64
00:04:52,823 --> 00:04:56,486
The broker called today and
upped the offer on the Porsche.
65
00:04:56,593 --> 00:04:59,562
- Malcolm, with what he's offering...
66
00:04:59,663 --> 00:05:03,827
we can remodel the garage into a playroom
and still have enough left over for a minivan.
67
00:05:03,934 --> 00:05:07,927
Whoa. Uh, now, a playrooms one thing.
68
00:05:08,038 --> 00:05:10,529
But I am not drivin no minivan.
69
00:05:10,641 --> 00:05:14,407
- Well, where are we gonna put a baby in that Porsche?
- It's got a trunk.
70
00:05:14,511 --> 00:05:18,413
Malcolm, all the talks we
had about having the baby...
71
00:05:18,515 --> 00:05:21,006
and how it was gonna change things?
72
00:05:21,118 --> 00:05:23,018
You promised me you were up for this.
73
00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:25,020
Yeah, baby, but to be fair...
74
00:05:25,122 --> 00:05:27,420
you were naked when most
of those promises were made.
75
00:05:27,524 --> 00:05:31,358
- Look, I'm just kiddin',, okay?
76
00:05:39,670 --> 00:05:41,900
She wants a minivan.
77
00:05:42,005 --> 00:05:45,168
Me driving a minivan? I
ain't gonna be able to do it.
78
00:05:45,275 --> 00:05:49,769
Next thing you know, I'll be asking
if I look fat in these jeans.
79
00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:51,848
This is my stuff?
80
00:05:54,985 --> 00:05:58,443
Kick me out of my office?
Hell, no. Crawford.
81
00:05:58,555 --> 00:06:01,888
It was my call. Field agents
have priority over P.R.
82
00:06:01,992 --> 00:06:04,426
- You gotta be kidding me, Crawford.
- Malcolm. Malcolm!
83
00:06:04,528 --> 00:06:07,224
Last night Doug Hudson
was killed in the line.
84
00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:11,801
Yeah.
85
00:06:20,477 --> 00:06:23,878
- I want in.
- I'm sure you do, but you're not a field agent anymore.
86
00:06:23,981 --> 00:06:26,472
Reinstate me. You know
what the man meant to me.
87
00:06:26,583 --> 00:06:30,110
He was my first partner. Hudson taught
me everything I know about this job.
88
00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:32,484
I know that. You think
I don't know that?
89
00:06:32,589 --> 00:06:34,921
But the Orange County
office has jurisdiction.
90
00:06:35,025 --> 00:06:36,925
They already have
their best people on it.
91
00:06:37,027 --> 00:06:39,757
You know full well the
best people for this is me.
92
00:06:39,863 --> 00:06:43,799
Not anymore. The fact is,
we don't need you, Malcolm.
93
00:06:49,573 --> 00:06:52,133
- Look.
94
00:06:52,242 --> 00:06:55,609
You're gonna have a baby. You
wanted a desk: we gave you one.
95
00:06:55,712 --> 00:06:59,409
Now, I know P.R.
isn't exactly what you-
96
00:06:59,516 --> 00:07:01,677
Did you really set
yourself on fire yesterday?
97
00:07:01,785 --> 00:07:05,243
Well, actually, it was
more of a controlled burn.
98
00:07:05,355 --> 00:07:07,448
The flames weren't that big.
99
00:07:07,557 --> 00:07:09,718
Uh-huh.
100
00:07:09,826 --> 00:07:13,091
Go home. Be with your wife.
Get your head on straight.
101
00:07:13,196 --> 00:07:15,426
I don't wanna see you anywhere
near this. And that's an order.
102
00:07:15,532 --> 00:07:17,659
- I find you sniffing
around, so- - I heard you.
103
00:07:19,303 --> 00:07:21,601
Lets get started, people.
104
00:07:38,522 --> 00:07:40,990
Hey, Erskine, Crawford
wants you in there.
105
00:07:41,091 --> 00:07:43,389
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
106
00:08:06,350 --> 00:08:09,080
The United States government
operates the most sophisticated...
107
00:08:09,186 --> 00:08:11,518
intelligence-gathering
operations in the world.
108
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:13,680
A few months ago, we
received anonymous intel...
109
00:08:13,790 --> 00:08:16,054
that someone was designing a worm-
110
00:08:16,159 --> 00:08:18,559
a backdoor hack into that system.
111
00:08:18,662 --> 00:08:21,187
So, terrorists, North Korea-
112
00:08:21,298 --> 00:08:23,232
whoever gets their hands on this
will know everything we know?
113
00:08:23,333 --> 00:08:26,461
N.S.A., C.I.A., D.O.D.
114
00:08:26,570 --> 00:08:29,539
All their databases
will be an open book.
115
00:08:29,639 --> 00:08:32,107
Military intelligence, launch codes.
116
00:08:32,209 --> 00:08:34,643
They'll have access to
everything we've got.
117
00:08:34,745 --> 00:08:37,578
Now, our chief suspect is Tom Fuller.
118
00:08:37,681 --> 00:08:41,811
As you can see, he spent a stint
in the army, military intelligence.
119
00:08:41,918 --> 00:08:46,981
He's now head of development of software at
a company called National Agenda Software.
120
00:08:48,892 --> 00:08:53,625
Agent Doug Hudson was working
undercover on Fullers technical team.
121
00:08:53,730 --> 00:08:56,164
I guess he got too close.
122
00:08:57,401 --> 00:08:59,767
Now, we've I.D.'d the
10 most likely buyers...
123
00:08:59,870 --> 00:09:01,963
and we have em under full surveillance.
124
00:09:06,143 --> 00:09:09,135
into Fullers house as a nanny.
125
00:09:13,750 --> 00:09:15,980
and well give 'em all
the bodies they need.
126
00:09:16,086 --> 00:09:19,112
- Now lets get to work.
- A nanny?
127
00:09:33,937 --> 00:09:37,270
Honey, look what I picked out
for the baby today. Isn't he cute?
128
00:09:40,444 --> 00:09:43,277
Wh-Why are you packing, Malcolm?
129
00:09:44,848 --> 00:09:47,316
Um, well, I'm just packing because, uh-
130
00:09:47,417 --> 00:09:50,284
Guess what?
- Huh?
131
00:09:50,387 --> 00:09:54,380
Um, There's this
- this convention. A safety convention.
132
00:09:54,491 --> 00:09:58,791
Seasoned professionals sharing
ideas. You know, a think tank.
133
00:09:58,895 --> 00:10:02,831
A think tank? Really? Well, who's going?
134
00:10:02,933 --> 00:10:05,800
- Uh, McGruff the
Crime Dog... - Uh-huh.
135
00:10:05,902 --> 00:10:08,132
uh, Smokey the Bear gonna be there.
136
00:10:08,238 --> 00:10:10,331
- Wow.
- Baby, all the heavy hitters.
137
00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:13,534
Now that I think about it,
like, they all comin out.
138
00:10:13,643 --> 00:10:18,478
So McGruff the Crime Dog and Goldie
the Safety Eagle? Honey, this is great!
139
00:10:18,582 --> 00:10:21,380
Well, its not like we sharing
a room or anything like that.
140
00:10:21,485 --> 00:10:25,080
- I don't get down like that.
- No, baby, I didn't mean it like that.
141
00:10:25,188 --> 00:10:28,180
I just
- I meant that I'm really proud of you.
142
00:10:28,291 --> 00:10:31,089
And I know you're working really
hard to make this new job work.
143
00:10:31,194 --> 00:10:34,186
And I know that you're
doing it for me...
144
00:10:34,297 --> 00:10:38,028
- and for Trent and for the baby.
145
00:10:38,134 --> 00:10:42,696
And for all the babies to come.
146
00:10:42,806 --> 00:10:45,934
Malcolm, I love you.
147
00:10:46,042 --> 00:10:50,035
- All the babies to
come? - Yeah. Mm- hmm.
148
00:10:50,146 --> 00:10:52,410
- You wanna give me
a number? - Mm-hmm.
149
00:11:34,057 --> 00:11:36,287
You understand you need
to get this job, right?
150
00:11:38,061 --> 00:11:41,428
All right. Well, we didn't have
time to cover all the angles...
151
00:11:41,531 --> 00:11:44,261
but with this résumé, you
shouldn't have any trouble at all.
152
00:11:44,367 --> 00:11:46,767
- Piece of cake.
- Okay, go.
153
00:11:49,272 --> 00:11:51,797
- Go get em.
154
00:11:51,908 --> 00:11:54,900
She is an excellent
agent. Very professional.
155
00:11:55,011 --> 00:11:57,241
Oh, Mrs. Gallagher, you're here.
156
00:11:57,347 --> 00:12:00,839
- I'm sorry I was so late.
- Hi.
157
00:12:00,951 --> 00:12:03,681
They're here. Can I
talk to you for a second?
158
00:12:03,787 --> 00:12:06,255
I want you to know things are gonna
be different this time, I promise.
159
00:12:06,356 --> 00:12:08,586
What? I don't know what you mean.
160
00:12:08,692 --> 00:12:10,660
Look, I know that I am particular.
161
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:13,160
But I am gonna work on it.
I'm gonna be more flexible.
162
00:12:13,263 --> 00:12:15,163
Probably not about
everything, but I think that...
163
00:12:15,265 --> 00:12:18,496
there is some wiggle room,
in some areas, probably.
164
00:12:20,136 --> 00:12:22,331
Lets just jump right
into the interviews.
165
00:12:22,439 --> 00:12:25,101
- Great. Whatever you want.
166
00:12:25,208 --> 00:12:27,540
I have three amazing candidates.
167
00:12:27,644 --> 00:12:30,704
Ladies, Id like you to
meet Mrs. Leah Fuller.
168
00:12:30,814 --> 00:12:33,715
Mrs. Fuller, this is-
169
00:12:33,817 --> 00:12:37,051
Ooh, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord.
170
00:12:37,153 --> 00:12:39,383
Big Mommas in the house.
171
00:12:39,489 --> 00:12:41,480
Ooh, hello.
172
00:12:41,591 --> 00:12:44,185
Oh, I'm sorry I'm late...
173
00:12:44,294 --> 00:12:46,854
but there was an incident on the bus.
174
00:12:46,963 --> 00:12:50,592
- Oh, my gosh. Are you okay?
- Well, lets just say there's one pervert...
175
00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:53,032
who wont playing the flute no time soon.
176
00:12:53,136 --> 00:12:56,628
Huh? Ooh, give me a second, please.
177
00:12:56,740 --> 00:13:01,541
Ooh, got my pressure all
up and my nerves goin. Ooh.
178
00:13:06,816 --> 00:13:08,750
Who the hell is that?
179
00:13:08,852 --> 00:13:10,752
Hey, uh, Constance, give me a close-up.
180
00:13:10,854 --> 00:13:14,483
Ooh, hi. I'm Hattie Mae Pierce.
181
00:13:14,591 --> 00:13:18,823
But you can call me Big Momma.
Everybody calls me Big Momma.
182
00:13:18,928 --> 00:13:22,261
Miss... Big Momma?
183
00:13:22,365 --> 00:13:27,200
Um, I'm not sure how you found out about
this job opening, but unfortunately-
184
00:13:27,303 --> 00:13:31,171
- Well, has the position been filled?
- Uh, no.
185
00:13:31,274 --> 00:13:33,606
Now, that's good equal opportunity.
186
00:13:33,710 --> 00:13:37,942
You should know I got Al
Sharpton on speed dial. Mm- hmm.
187
00:13:38,048 --> 00:13:41,245
Need me to call? Wanna make a call? Hmm?
188
00:13:41,351 --> 00:13:43,444
- Want a
rally? - Mm-mmm.
189
00:13:43,553 --> 00:13:47,649
First, we have Petra.
190
00:13:47,757 --> 00:13:50,555
- She studied art in Paris.
- Oh. Bonjour.
191
00:13:50,660 --> 00:13:53,220
- Hmm.
- She speaks four languages, and recently worked...
192
00:13:53,329 --> 00:13:56,560
for one of Orange County's
most respected families.
193
00:13:56,666 --> 00:13:58,600
Unfortunately, they divorced.
194
00:13:58,702 --> 00:14:01,603
Oh, child, that divorce
wasn't your fault.
195
00:14:01,705 --> 00:14:04,799
So what if men like to look
at you in your birthday suit?
196
00:14:04,908 --> 00:14:07,206
Excuse me?
197
00:14:07,310 --> 00:14:10,939
Well, the only way you get a tan
like that is by layin' out butt naked.
198
00:14:11,047 --> 00:14:13,777
Butterball naked. Hmm?
199
00:14:13,883 --> 00:14:15,783
Mrs. Fuller, I can assure you-
200
00:14:15,885 --> 00:14:19,048
No, its all right that you wanna
be a nudist. Do your nudie thing.
201
00:14:19,155 --> 00:14:21,419
All right? It's okay.
202
00:14:21,524 --> 00:14:24,493
I'm sure Mrs. Fuller
is not intimidated...
203
00:14:24,594 --> 00:14:26,619
by a pair of perky Ds.
204
00:14:26,730 --> 00:14:29,494
Hmm, Ds. Hmm? Hmm?
205
00:14:29,599 --> 00:14:32,864
Oh.
206
00:14:32,969 --> 00:14:35,267
Where you goin? Did I say somethin'?
207
00:14:35,371 --> 00:14:39,899
Ooh. You don't need nobody like
that around your husband anyway.
208
00:14:40,009 --> 00:14:44,605
Okay. Um, our next
candidate is Isabella.
209
00:14:44,714 --> 00:14:47,274
Isabella spent the last few
years in the Peace Corps.
210
00:14:47,383 --> 00:14:51,251
Wow. That explains it.
211
00:14:51,354 --> 00:14:54,983
You-You chasing the dragon?
212
00:14:55,091 --> 00:14:57,685
- What? - You firing
the 'aack- ack' gun?
213
00:14:57,794 --> 00:15:00,092
Child smoking the cheeba?
214
00:15:00,196 --> 00:15:03,927
I got two words: roach clip.
215
00:15:04,033 --> 00:15:06,365
So you don't burn your fingers.
216
00:15:06,469 --> 00:15:09,438
- Can you see that? - I should-
I should probably really go.
217
00:15:16,079 --> 00:15:18,843
Who is this woman?
218
00:15:18,948 --> 00:15:24,181
Well, if anyone is beyond
reproach, its Constance.
219
00:15:24,287 --> 00:15:26,187
Hello, Constance. It's
awfully nice to meet you.
220
00:15:26,289 --> 00:15:29,486
Now, I assume you are
completely 'aack-ack' free?
221
00:15:29,592 --> 00:15:31,651
Oh, yes, ma'am. Of course.
222
00:15:31,761 --> 00:15:33,729
She has impeccable references.
223
00:15:33,830 --> 00:15:35,730
She even studied child psychology.
224
00:15:35,832 --> 00:15:38,699
Ooh, that's impressive. Ooh.
225
00:15:38,802 --> 00:15:41,498
Well, children are my passion.
226
00:15:41,604 --> 00:15:44,971
- Oh. Oh, really?
Well, would you say...
227
00:15:45,074 --> 00:15:47,133
that you're a follower of Bouché?
228
00:15:47,243 --> 00:15:50,576
Or do you side more
with Kreiter's theory?
229
00:15:51,948 --> 00:15:54,815
Um, Kreiter.
230
00:15:54,918 --> 00:15:58,752
- Definitely Kreiter.
- Well, child, Kreiter's my butcher.
231
00:15:58,855 --> 00:16:03,224
And he can cook the hell out of a ham hock,
but he don't know nothin' about children.
232
00:16:03,326 --> 00:16:05,419
So what else are you lyin' about?
233
00:16:05,528 --> 00:16:07,519
What?
234
00:16:07,630 --> 00:16:11,157
Maybe you can forgive her lyin' ways...
235
00:16:11,267 --> 00:16:14,532
but I'm sure you don't
want a nanny who's packin'..
236
00:16:14,637 --> 00:16:16,571
Packing?
237
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:20,666
Oh, tell me this is not happening.
238
00:16:20,777 --> 00:16:24,338
- Should we discuss compensation?
239
00:16:26,015 --> 00:16:28,677
Oh, Big Momma, I am so glad you came by.
240
00:16:28,785 --> 00:16:33,620
I mean, can you imagine if I had
hired one of those other ladies?
241
00:16:33,723 --> 00:16:35,020
Oh, Big Momma, are you okay?
242
00:16:35,124 --> 00:16:38,093
Oh. Oh, what a lovely stool.
243
00:16:38,194 --> 00:16:40,094
And so comfortable.
244
00:16:40,196 --> 00:16:43,427
Well, let me tell you a
little bit about the Fullers.
245
00:16:43,533 --> 00:16:46,161
I own my own marketing business...
246
00:16:46,269 --> 00:16:49,761
and my husband, Tom, is in software.
247
00:16:52,709 --> 00:16:57,408
- Oh, my God! Big Momma, are you okay?
- Ooh. Ooh.
248
00:16:57,513 --> 00:17:00,744
Ooh. Excuse me.
249
00:17:00,850 --> 00:17:03,910
Uh, maybe I'll just stand.
250
00:17:04,020 --> 00:17:07,717
So your husbands out on a new
project? I can't wait to meet him.
251
00:17:07,824 --> 00:17:09,815
Yeah, well.
252
00:17:09,926 --> 00:17:12,793
- Uh, do you wanna know about the children?
- Well, that depends.
253
00:17:12,896 --> 00:17:16,093
- Will they be around a lot?
- Well, they live here...
254
00:17:16,199 --> 00:17:18,827
so pretty much all the time.
255
00:17:18,935 --> 00:17:21,665
Oh. Well...
256
00:17:21,771 --> 00:17:26,140
- in that case, Big Momma loves taking care of the kids.
- Oh, good.
257
00:17:26,242 --> 00:17:30,576
Unless, of course, you think they'd be
better off in a nice military academy.
258
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,739
- No.
259
00:17:32,849 --> 00:17:35,818
That's funny. I will warn you though...
260
00:17:35,919 --> 00:17:37,853
their schedules are pretty hectic...
261
00:17:37,954 --> 00:17:41,549
so I've come up with something
to help you keep it straight.
262
00:17:48,064 --> 00:17:50,692
Damn. How many kids you got?
263
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:54,201
I know. I have to remind myself
sometimes that its only three.
264
00:17:54,304 --> 00:17:57,364
But its not as bad as it looks,
once you get used to the system.
265
00:17:57,473 --> 00:18:01,068
Okay, for example,
sports are white pegs...
266
00:18:01,177 --> 00:18:03,645
music are yellow, um...
267
00:18:03,746 --> 00:18:06,840
tutoring is blue, and
household chores are red.
268
00:18:06,950 --> 00:18:11,512
Well, which peg says its time for
me to drink a 40 and watch Dr. Phil?
269
00:18:11,621 --> 00:18:13,521
You're funny.
270
00:18:13,623 --> 00:18:16,956
Um, my husband, Tom, seems to think that
I'm a little too obsessive about this...
271
00:18:17,060 --> 00:18:18,960
but, you know, the world is changing.
272
00:18:19,062 --> 00:18:22,054
And I want my kids to be able to
take advantage of it in every way.
273
00:18:22,165 --> 00:18:25,225
- Oh, rats!
274
00:18:25,335 --> 00:18:28,862
Oh, I'll handle it. Uh, all
I need is a hammer and a mop.
275
00:18:28,972 --> 00:18:32,066
- Oh, that's actually our dog, Poncho.
276
00:18:32,175 --> 00:18:34,075
He hasn't really been himself lately.
277
00:18:34,177 --> 00:18:36,202
We had this other dog named Carla.
278
00:18:36,312 --> 00:18:38,576
- She was Ponchos girlfriend.
279
00:18:38,681 --> 00:18:44,051
And she was out playing with a ball,
and there was this, um, wood chipper.
280
00:18:44,153 --> 00:18:47,281
- Wood chipper?
- Oh, he saw the whole thing.
281
00:18:47,390 --> 00:18:50,917
- He blames himself.
It's a tragedy, really.
282
00:18:51,027 --> 00:18:55,225
Anyway, lets go meet the children.
283
00:18:55,331 --> 00:18:57,822
First, we have Andrew. He's three.
284
00:19:01,104 --> 00:19:03,231
Oh, my goodness.
285
00:19:03,339 --> 00:19:06,137
I know. He does that all day long.
286
00:19:06,242 --> 00:19:09,575
And you would think that he would
get hurt, but he never seems to.
287
00:19:09,679 --> 00:19:11,738
Boy, you are two kinds of crazy.
288
00:19:11,848 --> 00:19:15,682
You cant be throwing
yourself around like that.
289
00:19:15,785 --> 00:19:18,447
Oh, he doesn't speak, at all.
290
00:19:18,554 --> 00:19:20,784
We've taken him to a bunch of
specialists. They insist nothing's wrong...
291
00:19:20,890 --> 00:19:22,858
that hell talk when he's ready.
292
00:19:22,959 --> 00:19:25,393
So until then-
293
00:19:25,495 --> 00:19:27,588
Well, I hope he's wearing a cup.
294
00:19:29,799 --> 00:19:32,859
Boy just-
295
00:19:37,974 --> 00:19:40,568
This is Carrie. She's
our little cheerleader.
296
00:19:43,079 --> 00:19:45,274
Hey, Carrie, I wanna
introduce you to someone.
297
00:19:45,381 --> 00:19:47,781
This is Big Momma. She's
gonna be our new nanny.
298
00:19:47,884 --> 00:19:49,784
Hi. Mommy...
299
00:19:49,886 --> 00:19:51,786
can you please help me with my routine?
300
00:19:51,888 --> 00:19:53,822
Why, babe? You're doing great.
301
00:20:02,098 --> 00:20:05,556
Id get everything
pointy out of the room.
302
00:20:07,937 --> 00:20:10,735
is going through a bit of a phase.
303
00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:14,970
Well, like this, for example.
304
00:20:15,078 --> 00:20:17,239
She never used to lock her door.
305
00:20:17,346 --> 00:20:19,439
- Well, I could bust it down if you want.
- Oh, no. That's all right.
306
00:20:19,549 --> 00:20:23,110
A couple of months ago, she started hanging
out with this new group of friends...
307
00:20:23,219 --> 00:20:26,620
including this boy, Chad,
who, lets just say...
308
00:20:26,722 --> 00:20:28,622
would not be our favorite.
309
00:20:31,894 --> 00:20:34,590
Damn.
310
00:20:34,697 --> 00:20:39,031
- Molly now prefers a- - A
free- flow living environment.
311
00:20:39,135 --> 00:20:41,865
Well, at some point,
this flow backed up.
312
00:20:41,971 --> 00:20:45,839
This is Big Momma. She's gonna
be our new nanny. Big Momma...
313
00:20:45,942 --> 00:20:49,673
- this used to be Molly.
- Molly, yes.
314
00:20:52,748 --> 00:20:55,273
Did somethin die in here?
315
00:20:56,586 --> 00:21:00,181
Yeah, probably. Listen,
Mom, I was studying.
316
00:21:00,289 --> 00:21:03,816
- So if you guys could please
go- - Anything to get rid of me.
317
00:21:03,926 --> 00:21:07,726
Mom, you always do this. I swear to God
I was on my bed with my history book.
318
00:21:07,830 --> 00:21:09,821
- I was studying.
- Okay, okay. I'm gonna go.
319
00:21:09,932 --> 00:21:12,457
- Bye.
- Okay.
320
00:21:14,103 --> 00:21:17,266
You weren't studyin',, and
you weren't on that bed.
321
00:21:17,373 --> 00:21:19,898
- I totally was.
- No.
322
00:21:20,009 --> 00:21:22,136
You were sitting at the computer.
323
00:21:22,245 --> 00:21:24,805
And your history book is over there...
324
00:21:24,914 --> 00:21:28,406
by that nasty egg salad sandwich,
which explains the smell.
325
00:21:28,518 --> 00:21:32,352
Watch it, girl. There's
a new sheriff in town.
326
00:21:36,959 --> 00:21:39,018
Here we are.
327
00:21:39,128 --> 00:21:41,722
Ooh!
328
00:21:41,831 --> 00:21:46,495
This is my room? Oh, Big Momma done died and gone to the Ritz
- Carlton.
329
00:21:46,602 --> 00:21:49,264
Oh, I am so glad you like it.
330
00:21:49,372 --> 00:21:52,034
Okay, well, why don't
you just settle in...
331
00:21:52,141 --> 00:21:55,076
- and well get started first thing in the morning?
- All right.
332
00:21:55,178 --> 00:21:58,705
I'm so happy you're here, Big Momma. And
I know Mr. Fuller's gonna like you too.
333
00:21:58,814 --> 00:22:02,181
- Oh, he's gonna love me.
- Let me know if you need anything.
334
00:22:05,721 --> 00:22:07,621
Yes!
335
00:22:09,125 --> 00:22:11,457
Time to go to work.
336
00:22:41,524 --> 00:22:43,651
Copying files.
337
00:22:55,271 --> 00:22:58,240
- Hey, baby.
338
00:22:58,341 --> 00:23:00,935
I got worried when you
didn't call. How's Phoenix?
339
00:23:01,043 --> 00:23:04,137
Oh, Phoenix? The convention.
340
00:23:04,247 --> 00:23:08,445
Well, what else did you think I was talking
about-Why are you whispering, Malcolm?
341
00:23:08,551 --> 00:23:11,213
Oh, no, no. We just, uh...
342
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:13,948
doing a lot of, you know,
safety chanting, baby.
343
00:23:14,056 --> 00:23:16,991
You know, uh, 'Stop, drop
and roll. ' You know.
344
00:23:17,093 --> 00:23:20,790
That McGruff is a freak.
Dog don't know when to quit.
345
00:23:20,896 --> 00:23:24,798
Baby, this is kind of late.
Maybe you should get some sleep.
346
00:23:24,900 --> 00:23:28,802
Oh, I know. I know, but I just
needed to hear your voice. I miss you.
347
00:23:28,904 --> 00:23:32,032
Trent and I had dinner tonight, and I
must have eaten something too spicy...
348
00:23:32,141 --> 00:23:34,609
- because the baby's been kicking
like- - Yeah, baby, I love you too.
349
00:23:34,710 --> 00:23:36,678
- Bye.
350
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:12,811
Ugh.
351
00:24:17,753 --> 00:24:21,245
Oh. Where's everybody?
352
00:24:22,191 --> 00:24:25,160
- Oh.
353
00:24:25,261 --> 00:24:27,695
Oh, climbing on the cabinets
is his latest accomplishment.
354
00:24:27,797 --> 00:24:31,198
You okay, Andrew? Whoo.
355
00:24:31,300 --> 00:24:35,498
Mr. Fuller, so nice to meet you.
356
00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:37,834
I'm Hattie Mae Pierce, but
you can call me Big Momma.
357
00:24:37,940 --> 00:24:40,500
It's great to meet you. My wife
has an early-morning meeting...
358
00:24:40,609 --> 00:24:42,577
and I am so late.
359
00:24:43,946 --> 00:24:45,846
You leaving me alone with the kids?
360
00:24:45,948 --> 00:24:49,111
Mr. Fuller! Mi-
361
00:24:52,421 --> 00:24:56,255
Big Momma, I think Andrew
just ate a Brillo pad.
362
00:24:58,661 --> 00:25:02,256
Andrew, no! Well, that's
one way to get your roughage.
363
00:25:05,968 --> 00:25:09,802
- That means if we don't leave
right now, we're gonna be late.
364
00:25:09,905 --> 00:25:12,601
Why don't your daddy take you to school?
365
00:25:12,708 --> 00:25:16,303
Daddy says he has an important job
where important things happen...
366
00:25:16,412 --> 00:25:18,607
so he cant waste his
time with our nonsense.
367
00:25:20,316 --> 00:25:22,716
Molly! We gotta go!
368
00:25:22,818 --> 00:25:25,446
But, Big Momma, Mommy
didn't get me any breakfast.
369
00:25:25,554 --> 00:25:27,988
Breakfast?
370
00:25:29,225 --> 00:25:32,956
Okay, uh
- Oh. Oh.
371
00:25:33,996 --> 00:25:37,625
Yeah. Yeah, there you go.
372
00:25:37,733 --> 00:25:40,099
Oh.
373
00:25:40,202 --> 00:25:44,104
All righty. Yes, indeedy.
374
00:25:44,206 --> 00:25:47,175
Right. Like that there.
375
00:25:49,512 --> 00:25:52,640
A hearty helping-All right?
376
00:25:59,655 --> 00:26:04,422
Oh. Looks like somebody
got a note on the red peg.
377
00:26:04,527 --> 00:26:08,793
Ooh, notes on red pegs
are really important.
378
00:26:08,898 --> 00:26:13,358
You kiddin? This peg stuff is for real?
379
00:26:13,469 --> 00:26:15,596
She wants me to do all this?
380
00:26:15,704 --> 00:26:18,832
It is your job, Sheriff.
381
00:26:18,941 --> 00:26:22,399
Girl, you got a mean streak in you...
382
00:26:22,511 --> 00:26:24,877
and God don't like ugly.
383
00:26:24,980 --> 00:26:27,608
Now get in the car and
take your sister with you.
384
00:27:05,488 --> 00:27:07,922
Sorry about that, Poncho!
385
00:27:37,019 --> 00:27:38,919
You sure these aren't yours?
386
00:27:39,021 --> 00:27:42,616
- How big do you think
I am? I'm just playin'..
387
00:27:42,725 --> 00:27:46,217
But how in the hell did
these get under your bed?
388
00:27:46,328 --> 00:27:48,762
I don't know. I don't know. But
Malcolm would never cheat on me.
389
00:27:48,864 --> 00:27:51,230
Especially not with-
390
00:27:51,333 --> 00:27:53,597
This is like four yards of lace.
391
00:27:53,702 --> 00:27:56,262
Well, regardless, you cant just sit
back and hope nothin' is going on.
392
00:27:56,372 --> 00:27:58,272
You gotta take action.
393
00:27:58,374 --> 00:28:00,399
For a hundred dollars, I know
somebody that'll bug his phone.
394
00:28:00,509 --> 00:28:03,478
No. No, absolutely not.
395
00:28:03,579 --> 00:28:05,979
I would never bug Malcolm's phone.
396
00:28:06,081 --> 00:28:11,212
- I completely trust my husband.
- Sherri, you are so naive.
397
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:13,720
You married an F.B.I. agent.
398
00:28:13,822 --> 00:28:17,952
I bet on your wedding night, he drugged you
and embedded a tracking device in your ass.
399
00:28:18,060 --> 00:28:21,518
I don't have a tracking device.
400
00:28:21,630 --> 00:28:27,068
Danielle, there's gotta be a perfectly
logical explanation for these.
401
00:28:27,169 --> 00:28:29,160
A woman this big, wearing a thong?
402
00:28:29,271 --> 00:28:32,263
That cant be comfortable.
403
00:28:32,374 --> 00:28:34,274
Can it?
404
00:28:34,376 --> 00:28:37,140
Ooh. Uh-oh. Ooh.
405
00:28:37,246 --> 00:28:39,510
Big Momma got to be careful.
406
00:28:39,615 --> 00:28:44,018
I lose control of this thong,
it could disappear for days.
407
00:28:46,555 --> 00:28:51,458
Hi there. I'm Hattie Mae Pierce,
but you can call me Big Momma.
408
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:54,791
Everybody calls me Big Momma.
409
00:28:54,897 --> 00:28:58,993
You wanna say hello, Andrew?
This here is Tom Fullers boy.
410
00:28:59,101 --> 00:29:02,798
Fine. This is a secure facility, and I-
411
00:29:02,905 --> 00:29:07,467
- Um- Uh, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa. - Ooh. Uh-
412
00:29:10,045 --> 00:29:13,879
Please, you don't know me like
that. You better ask somebody.
413
00:29:13,983 --> 00:29:17,578
Let me set the baby down.
I don't wanna get him upset.
414
00:29:17,686 --> 00:29:20,712
- Hold on.
- I'm, uh, gonna have to wand you.
415
00:29:20,823 --> 00:29:23,792
Wand me? Well, wand on.
416
00:29:26,462 --> 00:29:30,193
- Find what you're lookin' for?
417
00:29:30,299 --> 00:29:33,530
It-That-That's
under wire. Yeah.
418
00:29:33,636 --> 00:29:36,537
Keepin' these fun bags off
the floor is a full-time job.
419
00:29:36,639 --> 00:29:39,199
- You wanna see? I'll show you, yeah.
- No, ma'am.
420
00:29:39,308 --> 00:29:41,708
- It's all right. You can take a little peeky peek.
- No, you can stop.
421
00:29:41,810 --> 00:29:45,211
- No, ma'am. You can stop.
- But I'm not responsible for the damages.
422
00:29:45,314 --> 00:29:47,646
- It might poke your eyes out. -
Please, stop it. Don't- Don't unbutton!
423
00:29:50,853 --> 00:29:53,515
Eighteenth floor.
424
00:29:53,622 --> 00:29:55,988
Ooh, thank you.
425
00:29:56,091 --> 00:29:59,458
Ooh, all these guards and locked doors.
426
00:29:59,561 --> 00:30:02,689
This must be what its like to get
in one of Oprah's private parties.
427
00:30:02,798 --> 00:30:04,925
Yeah.
428
00:30:05,034 --> 00:30:09,232
You know what, Ms. Pierce? Um, I'm afraid Mr.
Fuller has a meeting in the conference room...
429
00:30:09,338 --> 00:30:11,238
and I'm not allowed to disturb him.
430
00:30:11,340 --> 00:30:13,433
- Okay, well, I'll
just wait in- - Yeah.
431
00:30:17,546 --> 00:30:21,004
Ooh. We got a gusher.
432
00:30:21,116 --> 00:30:26,383
Oh, my goodness. Oh, this is the last
time I feed this boy pickled pigs feet.
433
00:30:26,488 --> 00:30:28,615
You're going to change
his diaper right here?
434
00:30:28,724 --> 00:30:32,023
Ah, yes, but don't worry.
I'll contain the seepage, okay?
435
00:30:32,127 --> 00:30:34,618
I just hope your hard
drives are backed up.
436
00:30:34,730 --> 00:30:37,597
Mr. Fuller has a bathroom in his office.
437
00:30:42,171 --> 00:30:46,107
Okay, Andrew. That programs gotta
be hidin' up in here somewhere.
438
00:30:59,354 --> 00:31:02,050
A remote, but no TV.
439
00:31:15,604 --> 00:31:17,469
Open sesame.
440
00:31:20,709 --> 00:31:24,839
We did an extensive check on Mr.
Fuller and didn't find anything.
441
00:31:24,947 --> 00:31:28,508
Basically, we've got a small
army of agents working out there.
442
00:31:28,617 --> 00:31:31,085
And because Agent Stone
blew a nanny interview...
443
00:31:31,186 --> 00:31:33,120
we got nothin:
444
00:31:33,222 --> 00:31:35,747
Look, we gotta get
somebody on the inside.
445
00:31:35,858 --> 00:31:38,224
Now, isn't there anybody close
to Fuller that we can turn?
446
00:31:38,327 --> 00:31:42,263
No. We have tried everybody who has any
contact with anyone inside that house.
447
00:31:42,364 --> 00:31:45,925
- We have exhausted the list.
- Wait a minute.
448
00:31:46,034 --> 00:31:48,434
I know someone we haven't tried yet.
449
00:31:52,274 --> 00:31:55,334
Because were coming up on our deadline,
and I need to know your status.
450
00:31:55,444 --> 00:31:58,174
- Ooh, look. There's your daddy.
- I need to know if you're ready.
451
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:01,681
Look, I wouldn't have flown out here
if I wasn't ready. Now where's my money?
452
00:32:01,784 --> 00:32:04,014
Don't worry about the
money. Where do we meet?
453
00:32:04,119 --> 00:32:06,553
That's right. Give me somethin'..
454
00:32:06,655 --> 00:32:09,021
Tonight, 7:00, West Hills Mall.
455
00:32:09,124 --> 00:32:11,456
- Where?
- The surf shop, dude.
456
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:13,653
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
457
00:32:13,762 --> 00:32:16,788
- Someone in the building is logged on to our conference.
- You gotta be kidding me!
458
00:32:16,899 --> 00:32:19,299
You guys are amateurs,
dude. I'm outta here.
459
00:32:19,401 --> 00:32:23,167
- What happened?
- Someone was watching.
460
00:32:23,272 --> 00:32:25,467
Wed better find out who that someone is.
461
00:32:31,346 --> 00:32:34,008
Ooh, ooh. Comin through. 'Scuse me.
462
00:32:34,116 --> 00:32:36,846
Comin through. Ooh.
463
00:32:36,952 --> 00:32:40,080
I cleaned up in there
as much as possible.
464
00:32:40,189 --> 00:32:43,886
Ooh. Mr. Fuller.
465
00:32:43,992 --> 00:32:46,893
Andrew and I thought wed come
down and pay you a little visit.
466
00:32:46,995 --> 00:32:48,986
Ain't that right, Andrew?
467
00:32:50,599 --> 00:32:53,864
Hi, Son.
468
00:32:53,969 --> 00:32:58,269
Ooh, well, were workin' on that
talkin' thing. Can you say Tupac?
469
00:33:00,509 --> 00:33:03,672
Oh, hell get it. He'll get it.
470
00:33:03,779 --> 00:33:07,044
Tom, is there a problem?
471
00:33:07,149 --> 00:33:11,085
- No, this is, um- -
Uh, Hattie Mae Pierce.
472
00:33:11,186 --> 00:33:14,747
Hi. I take care of Tom Fullers babies.
473
00:33:14,857 --> 00:33:16,757
Tom?
474
00:33:16,859 --> 00:33:20,260
Ooh, look at the time. We gotta go.
475
00:33:21,530 --> 00:33:24,522
Oh, yes, there we go.
476
00:33:24,633 --> 00:33:28,399
Ooh, do me a favor, will
you? Hold that for me.
477
00:33:28,503 --> 00:33:30,971
Thank you.
478
00:33:33,876 --> 00:33:35,844
Get rid of that.
479
00:33:37,212 --> 00:33:39,578
Did you have a good time today?
480
00:33:39,681 --> 00:33:42,309
Huh?
481
00:33:42,417 --> 00:33:45,079
Big Mommas tryin' to fix this.
482
00:33:46,255 --> 00:33:49,418
F.B.I.
483
00:33:49,524 --> 00:33:52,789
Sorry, ma'am. I'm gonna have to ask
you to step inside the van, please.
484
00:33:58,667 --> 00:34:01,295
Don't push me. You don't
know me, monkey mouth.
485
00:34:01,403 --> 00:34:04,167
I- I-I'll
kick you.
486
00:34:08,677 --> 00:34:10,577
Look, I-I can explain.
487
00:34:10,679 --> 00:34:14,843
Ms. Pierce, I am so sorry
for the inconvenience.
488
00:34:14,950 --> 00:34:17,145
Can I get you anything?
489
00:34:18,253 --> 00:34:20,244
Look, if this is about...
490
00:34:20,355 --> 00:34:23,984
those butt-ball naked
pictures of Billy Dee...
491
00:34:24,092 --> 00:34:26,925
you gotta understand, that's Billy.
492
00:34:27,029 --> 00:34:30,328
I just checked my e-mail. There he was.
493
00:34:30,432 --> 00:34:33,128
I go, 'Ooh! Oooh!'
494
00:34:33,235 --> 00:34:38,298
And all I could say to myself was, 'II
got Billy! I got Billy! I got Billy!'
495
00:34:38,407 --> 00:34:42,138
No. No, I, uh-
496
00:34:42,244 --> 00:34:44,371
I can assure you-
497
00:34:44,479 --> 00:34:47,971
Ms. Pierce, the F.B.I. is
investigating Tom Fuller.
498
00:34:48,083 --> 00:34:52,019
Mr. Fuller? Have mercy.
499
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:56,454
Yes. And since you seem to have
such close access to the family...
500
00:34:56,558 --> 00:34:58,458
the fact is, we could
really use your help.
501
00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:01,791
Well, what could Big Momma possibly-
502
00:35:02,998 --> 00:35:06,365
I get it. You want me to take him out.
503
00:35:06,468 --> 00:35:08,993
- No. No. -
Yeah. Uh- uh?
504
00:35:09,104 --> 00:35:13,200
- No. We just want you to keep an eye on him.
- Ah?
505
00:35:13,308 --> 00:35:18,245
You know, have you seen or heard
anything out of the ordinary?
506
00:35:18,347 --> 00:35:20,838
Uh, wait.
507
00:35:20,949 --> 00:35:24,851
He seems to be getting outside help
on that big project he's working on.
508
00:35:24,953 --> 00:35:27,922
But what's really important is...
509
00:35:28,023 --> 00:35:30,992
we need to find out
who he's working with.
510
00:35:31,093 --> 00:35:35,496
Now, ma'am, do you think you
could find out that information?
511
00:35:35,597 --> 00:35:38,395
Well, um.
512
00:35:38,500 --> 00:35:42,834
Well, my m. o. would be
to stay close to the perps.
513
00:35:42,938 --> 00:35:45,372
That way, I wont
compromise the assets...
514
00:35:45,474 --> 00:35:48,102
and I'll wait for the
intel to fall in my hands.
515
00:35:48,210 --> 00:35:50,110
- Excuse me?
- Well, I mean...
516
00:35:50,212 --> 00:35:53,443
you watch enough Kojak,
you pick up a few things.
517
00:35:53,548 --> 00:35:57,177
Don't worry. Big Momma
got that. I got it.
518
00:36:26,548 --> 00:36:28,948
Good Lord, help em all.
519
00:36:29,051 --> 00:36:31,781
Now, I know you got
somethin to say to that.
520
00:36:33,221 --> 00:36:35,416
Nothin?
521
00:36:35,524 --> 00:36:38,118
Well, well work on it.
522
00:36:40,595 --> 00:36:41,840
- I think we should show em the sprinkler.
- Let's swing.
523
00:36:41,875 --> 00:36:43,086
- I think we should show em the sprinkler.
- Let's swing.
524
00:36:43,198 --> 00:36:45,894
- All right, from the top. Ready? Five, six
-
525
00:36:46,001 --> 00:36:48,299
Hey, you've reached
Malcolm, Sherri and Trent.
526
00:36:48,403 --> 00:36:50,997
We cant take your call, but leave a
message, and we'll get back with you.
527
00:36:51,106 --> 00:36:54,872
- Hey, Sherri. It's me, baby.
528
00:36:54,976 --> 00:36:58,104
You know, just thinkin about you-
529
00:36:58,213 --> 00:37:00,977
Wanna give you a call from, uh
- from Phoenix.
530
00:37:01,083 --> 00:37:04,450
- Ow!
531
00:37:04,553 --> 00:37:07,249
Okay, loser.
532
00:37:07,355 --> 00:37:11,257
Wait
- Carrie! I gotta go, baby.
533
00:37:12,494 --> 00:37:14,394
- Oh.
534
00:37:16,865 --> 00:37:20,460
...give you a call from, uh
- from Phoenix.
535
00:37:20,569 --> 00:37:23,595
Wait. Carrie!
536
00:37:23,705 --> 00:37:25,605
- Carrie?
- I gotta go, baby.
537
00:37:32,581 --> 00:37:34,572
Carrie?
538
00:37:40,722 --> 00:37:45,216
You
- You know, those girls got no room to talk.
539
00:37:45,327 --> 00:37:48,524
- That ain't dancin'.. -
And chassé. And pump. And-
540
00:37:48,630 --> 00:37:50,530
That's getting Tasered by the police.
541
00:37:50,632 --> 00:37:53,430
Big Momma, I don't care about that.
542
00:37:53,535 --> 00:37:56,197
I just
- I wanna be good, you know?
543
00:37:56,304 --> 00:37:58,795
If I was good, then my
dad would come watch me...
544
00:37:58,907 --> 00:38:01,637
cause then it wouldn't be
nonsense and a waste of his time.
545
00:38:01,743 --> 00:38:05,474
Child, you could dance like
all those skinny girls on MTV.
546
00:38:05,580 --> 00:38:08,913
That wouldn't make your daddy stay home.
547
00:38:09,017 --> 00:38:13,010
Now, he loves you. He just has
a helluva fine way of showin' it.
548
00:38:14,723 --> 00:38:18,819
Now, you can do this little
cheerleading dance thing. I know you can.
549
00:38:18,927 --> 00:38:23,591
But you need to do it for
yourself, not anybody else.
550
00:38:25,634 --> 00:38:29,365
Stand up. Let me show you somethin.
551
00:38:31,206 --> 00:38:33,902
- Watch Big Momma. See?
552
00:38:34,009 --> 00:38:35,943
Rock with it, baby. Rock with it.
553
00:38:36,044 --> 00:38:38,239
Just feel it.
554
00:38:38,346 --> 00:38:41,679
All try? All right.
Ready, now. To the right.
555
00:38:41,783 --> 00:38:44,115
You gotta go right, baby. There you go.
556
00:38:44,219 --> 00:38:47,245
No, no, not your leg. Bring your hip.
557
00:38:47,355 --> 00:38:51,348
Bring your hip and
then you dip. Hip, dip.
558
00:38:51,459 --> 00:38:54,428
Hip, dip. There you go,
Carrie! That's it, Carrie!
559
00:38:54,529 --> 00:38:57,225
There go
- Now rock with it. Rock with it, Carrie.
560
00:38:57,332 --> 00:39:01,962
Rock with it. Now dip, baby. Whoo!
561
00:39:02,070 --> 00:39:04,197
Dip, dip, dip, baby.
562
00:39:04,306 --> 00:39:06,604
- Whoo
- hoo! There you go, Carrie.
563
00:39:06,708 --> 00:39:09,268
- There you go, Carrie. Ooh.
- Okay, guys.
564
00:39:09,377 --> 00:39:13,370
Um, girls, keep working. You look
great. Well be right back. Keep going.
565
00:39:13,481 --> 00:39:17,884
- Ooh. Ooh.
- Um, excuse me?
566
00:39:20,155 --> 00:39:22,783
- Can I help you?
- You can dance.
567
00:39:22,891 --> 00:39:25,792
- So?
- We suck.
568
00:39:25,894 --> 00:39:28,328
- Aw, come on. Were not that bad.
- Lisa, are you kidding?
569
00:39:28,430 --> 00:39:31,593
We are flailing around like
a couple of stroke victims.
570
00:39:31,700 --> 00:39:34,533
Okay, so maybe we could use a
little help with the dancing part...
571
00:39:34,636 --> 00:39:36,570
but I've got the stunts covered.
572
00:39:36,671 --> 00:39:39,731
I was a gymnast.
573
00:39:39,841 --> 00:39:43,436
Look, we really need your help.
We've got this competition coming up.
574
00:39:43,545 --> 00:39:47,140
You want the girls to go
up on stage doing... that?
575
00:39:47,249 --> 00:39:49,149
Ooh.
576
00:39:49,251 --> 00:39:51,617
Well, as scary as that
is, I'm gonna have to pass.
577
00:39:51,720 --> 00:39:56,157
- But, Big Momma.
- Don't you Big Momma me.
578
00:39:59,861 --> 00:40:01,829
Now, I didn't cry during
Waiting to Exhale...
579
00:40:01,930 --> 00:40:04,364
and I'm certainly not gonna
fall for your puppy-dog eyes.
580
00:40:04,466 --> 00:40:07,799
Now, this day is gettin' away
from me. We got to go, Carrie.
581
00:40:11,072 --> 00:40:16,271
What do you say we practice at
your house tomorrow morning, Carrie?
582
00:40:16,378 --> 00:40:18,505
- Good idea.
- Mmm.
583
00:40:21,316 --> 00:40:23,750
Carrie?
584
00:40:24,786 --> 00:40:26,754
He doesn't even know any-
585
00:40:32,327 --> 00:40:35,626
- F.B.I., Los Angeles.
586
00:40:35,730 --> 00:40:37,630
Tassie?
- Sherri?
587
00:40:37,732 --> 00:40:41,190
- Hey, girl. How you feeling?
- Oh, large.
588
00:40:41,303 --> 00:40:45,000
Then I bet it feels good havin'
Malcolm home takin' care of you.
589
00:40:45,106 --> 00:40:48,041
Putting in for two weeks off
to wait on you hand and foot?
590
00:40:48,143 --> 00:40:50,407
I hope you know what
kind of man you got there.
591
00:40:50,512 --> 00:40:54,312
I'm starting to get the picture.
592
00:41:06,161 --> 00:41:09,824
Take your little brother in
there for me. I'll be right there.
593
00:41:15,704 --> 00:41:19,606
What the hell you doing
sneaking around in bushes?
594
00:41:19,708 --> 00:41:21,608
You cant take-
595
00:41:23,311 --> 00:41:27,008
Chad? 19?
596
00:41:27,115 --> 00:41:29,447
This girl up in here is 15.
597
00:41:29,551 --> 00:41:33,453
Boy, you must be stuck on
stupid. This stops today.
598
00:41:41,029 --> 00:41:45,227
- Oh, hey, Big Momma. I'm
just gonna check the mail.
599
00:41:45,333 --> 00:41:49,064
That package you ordered
has just been sent back.
600
00:41:49,170 --> 00:41:52,401
What? Oh, no. You've
gotta be kidding me.
601
00:41:52,507 --> 00:41:56,238
Molly, boys that age
only want one thing...
602
00:41:56,344 --> 00:41:58,312
and it ain't meaningful conversation.
603
00:41:58,413 --> 00:42:00,973
I don't have to listen to you.
604
00:42:01,082 --> 00:42:05,109
Don't get snatched up. Now get
upstairs and finish your homework.
605
00:42:05,220 --> 00:42:08,053
I got Mace.
606
00:42:12,060 --> 00:42:15,552
What is going on? Did you
just threaten my daughter?
607
00:42:15,663 --> 00:42:21,101
- Oh, that's no
threat. I do carry Mace.
608
00:42:21,202 --> 00:42:24,399
Hey. Big Momma, I think we need to talk.
609
00:42:24,506 --> 00:42:27,498
Good, Id love to. How
about 9:00 in the morning?
610
00:42:27,609 --> 00:42:30,510
- That's when I watch Regis.
- I don't think that it can wait.
611
00:42:30,612 --> 00:42:33,012
If you had checked the peg
board, you would've seen...
612
00:42:33,114 --> 00:42:36,174
that Carrie had a violin
lesson and Andrew had tutoring.
613
00:42:36,284 --> 00:42:40,118
Tutoring? The boys only two years old.
614
00:42:40,221 --> 00:42:42,985
I want my children to be able to
seize every opportunity that they can.
615
00:42:43,091 --> 00:42:45,252
And they might want to go
to Harvard. And if they do...
616
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:47,487
I want to make sure that
that is a possibility.
617
00:42:47,595 --> 00:42:51,895
Andrew is jumpin' off the
cabinets, eatin' Brillo pads.
618
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,766
He's not goin' to Harvard. You can
get that out your head right now.
619
00:42:55,870 --> 00:43:00,136
And besides, if you had noticed, there
was quite a bit of housework for you to do.
620
00:43:00,241 --> 00:43:03,301
Yeah, I
- I been meanin' to talk to you about that.
621
00:43:03,411 --> 00:43:07,507
Those red pegs, you might
wanna go easy on em, all right?
622
00:43:07,615 --> 00:43:10,948
Now, if you'll excuse me,
Big Momma has an appointment.
623
00:43:11,052 --> 00:43:14,510
- Well, what about dinner?
- I already ate, but thank you.
624
00:43:21,329 --> 00:43:24,628
- Uh, okay, this is Agent Keneally.
625
00:43:24,732 --> 00:43:27,223
Please advise. I just made
B.M. in the back of a cab.
626
00:43:27,335 --> 00:43:30,600
Uh, you did what in the back of the cab?
627
00:43:30,705 --> 00:43:35,005
Big Momma! I just made B
- I saw Big Momma in the back of a cab.
628
00:43:35,109 --> 00:43:37,043
And now I'm going to get V.D.
629
00:43:37,145 --> 00:43:39,511
Visual data. I'm going
- Never mind.
630
00:43:45,820 --> 00:43:48,914
This is where I need you to
carry me and make it snappy.
631
00:43:49,023 --> 00:43:51,491
Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am.
632
00:44:01,135 --> 00:44:05,367
If you favor those eyes, I
suggest you keep em on the road.
633
00:44:05,473 --> 00:44:07,373
Yes, ma'am.
634
00:44:09,344 --> 00:44:12,245
- On the road.
- Yes, ma'am. Yeah.
635
00:44:14,782 --> 00:44:17,250
- Hello, Bob.
636
00:44:17,352 --> 00:44:20,378
Sherri. You-You shouldn't
even be back here.
637
00:44:20,488 --> 00:44:23,423
- Where is he?
- How could I possibly know?
638
00:44:23,525 --> 00:44:26,892
Oh, come on, Bob. He's got a locator. Every
agent has one implanted in their phone.
639
00:44:26,995 --> 00:44:30,863
That is a silly, outrageous-
640
00:44:30,965 --> 00:44:33,092
- How did you know that?
- Bob...
641
00:44:33,201 --> 00:44:35,761
I am eight-and-a-half-months
pregnant.
642
00:44:35,870 --> 00:44:39,033
My feet are swollen, and
my back is killing me.
643
00:44:39,140 --> 00:44:44,601
I have peed 52 times today, and you don't even
wanna know what's going on with my nipples.
644
00:44:44,712 --> 00:44:48,204
- Can I at least guess?
- Bob, if you don't tell me where he is...
645
00:44:48,316 --> 00:44:50,546
- right
now- - Okay.
646
00:45:02,096 --> 00:45:03,996
Agent location, West Hills Mall.
647
00:45:04,098 --> 00:45:07,158
- Agent location, West Hills Mall.
- Thanks, Bob.
648
00:45:07,268 --> 00:45:10,829
- What's, um-What's a good place to go
surfing around here? - Oh, Huntington Beach.
649
00:45:10,939 --> 00:45:12,497
- Really?
- Beautiful.
650
00:45:12,607 --> 00:45:14,097
- It's so gorgeous. Hey.
651
00:45:14,208 --> 00:45:16,972
I'm sorry. I gotta go.
652
00:45:18,713 --> 00:45:21,273
I've been walking around
for an hour looking for you.
653
00:45:21,382 --> 00:45:24,351
- I was busy, if you hadn't noticed.
654
00:45:24,452 --> 00:45:27,546
Very, very specific encrypted notation.
655
00:45:29,390 --> 00:45:31,984
I'm not concerned about encryption.
656
00:45:40,768 --> 00:45:42,702
Ooh.
657
00:45:54,282 --> 00:45:56,546
Wife?
658
00:45:56,651 --> 00:45:58,983
Been there.
659
00:45:59,087 --> 00:46:00,952
Ooh.
660
00:46:17,472 --> 00:46:18,905
Ooh!
661
00:46:20,575 --> 00:46:22,668
Sherri? Baby-
662
00:46:22,777 --> 00:46:24,335
- Where is she?
- Who?
663
00:46:24,445 --> 00:46:27,505
- Who's Carrie, Malcolm? No.
664
00:46:27,615 --> 00:46:30,812
- Where is the Carrie girl?
- Baby, you got that all-
665
00:46:30,918 --> 00:46:32,749
- No- - Which one
of you is Carrie?
666
00:46:32,854 --> 00:46:35,049
Baby.
667
00:46:35,156 --> 00:46:37,249
Baby. Sherri.
668
00:46:37,358 --> 00:46:41,226
- Is your name Carrie?
- No, baby. That's not no Carrie.
669
00:46:41,329 --> 00:46:46,494
- You got it all wrong.
- Malcolm Turner, F.B.I.?
670
00:46:46,601 --> 00:46:50,162
- F.B.I.?
671
00:46:50,271 --> 00:46:53,206
You're on a case. Malcolm, you promised.
672
00:46:53,307 --> 00:46:56,140
Wanna explain these?
673
00:46:57,245 --> 00:46:59,611
And you drag my Big Momma into this?
674
00:46:59,714 --> 00:47:03,514
- I didn't drag no Big Momma into this.
- No, no. Just her breasts.
675
00:47:03,618 --> 00:47:06,451
I don't think nobody's talkin' to you.
676
00:47:06,554 --> 00:47:10,854
- Sherri. Come- - Let her go. Now
we got something to talk about.
677
00:47:10,958 --> 00:47:13,483
- I got Bishop.
- Where is he?
678
00:47:13,594 --> 00:47:17,360
Right over-
He's right over-
679
00:47:19,233 --> 00:47:21,758
- Wait-Where-
- Lets go.
680
00:47:21,869 --> 00:47:23,769
- Lets go. Knock it off.
681
00:47:23,871 --> 00:47:28,205
- Aw.
- Um, Malcolm, what are these made off? Like a buckwheat husk?
682
00:47:28,376 --> 00:47:30,742
This is him, right?
- Yeah.
683
00:47:30,845 --> 00:47:33,211
He's a hacker. Goes
by the name of Bishop.
684
00:47:33,314 --> 00:47:36,112
He's about as good as they get. There's
no question he could've pulled this off.
685
00:47:36,217 --> 00:47:38,276
Are you sure you can
find this guy Bishop?
686
00:47:38,386 --> 00:47:41,184
Cause right now he's our only lead.
687
00:47:41,289 --> 00:47:44,986
Well, he was checkin' out board
shops. He's a surfer, all right.
688
00:47:45,093 --> 00:47:48,392
There's no way he'd come to
Cali and not check out the waves.
689
00:47:48,496 --> 00:47:52,762
I'm gonna find him. I'm
telling you. I'm gonna find him.
690
00:47:52,867 --> 00:47:55,461
- Agent Keneally stays with you the whole time.
- Aw.
691
00:47:55,570 --> 00:47:57,401
- He's your new partner.
- You've got to be kiddin'..
692
00:47:57,505 --> 00:47:59,564
And, Turner, you blow your
cover and this worm gets out...
693
00:47:59,674 --> 00:48:03,474
you'll not only lose your job
- you're goin' to jail.
694
00:48:03,578 --> 00:48:07,446
Oh, and do not blow
your cover as Big Momma.
695
00:48:16,257 --> 00:48:18,487
- Ooh.
- Big Momma?
696
00:48:22,463 --> 00:48:27,025
Mrs. Fuller, can we do
this some other time?
697
00:48:28,336 --> 00:48:30,327
No, we cant.
698
00:48:30,438 --> 00:48:33,373
I came home tonight, and
you were nowhere to be found.
699
00:48:33,474 --> 00:48:36,705
The kids had not done their homework. I looked
around. There were dirty dishes everywhere.
700
00:48:36,811 --> 00:48:38,779
And then I found this.
701
00:48:40,114 --> 00:48:42,947
You threw our laundry in the garbage.
702
00:48:44,318 --> 00:48:47,253
Big Momma, you don't wanna
cook, you don't wanna clean...
703
00:48:47,355 --> 00:48:49,983
and you obviously don't respect what
I'm trying to do with my children.
704
00:48:50,091 --> 00:48:55,028
You mean keep em so busy that they don't realize
that you and your husband are never around?
705
00:48:57,098 --> 00:49:00,727
Ooh. I didn't mean to say that.
706
00:49:00,835 --> 00:49:04,236
I want you out of the house
first thing in the morning.
707
00:49:05,273 --> 00:49:07,298
Mrs. Fuller?
708
00:49:07,408 --> 00:49:09,968
But Mrs. Fuller?
709
00:50:12,874 --> 00:50:17,538
Hey, baby. Just wanted
to leave you a message...
710
00:50:17,645 --> 00:50:20,876
tell you I'm sorry I lied...
711
00:50:20,982 --> 00:50:23,576
and I love you.
712
00:50:23,684 --> 00:50:25,982
I hope you still want to hear that.
713
00:50:36,197 --> 00:50:39,064
Oh. This feels good.
714
00:50:39,166 --> 00:50:41,498
- Huh?
715
00:50:57,118 --> 00:51:02,181
Oh, Ponch, that's no
way for a dog to act.
716
00:51:05,626 --> 00:51:07,560
I got somethin for you.
717
00:51:10,431 --> 00:51:12,661
This'll help you get
over the wood chipper.
718
00:51:12,767 --> 00:51:17,261
All right? Here's a
little sippy-sip for you.
719
00:51:17,371 --> 00:51:20,397
- Yeah. Id have a drink with you...
720
00:51:20,508 --> 00:51:22,601
but I gotta go to work.
721
00:51:24,745 --> 00:51:28,613
Yeah. Go on and get
your tilt on, all right?
722
00:51:31,452 --> 00:51:33,352
- I know that you're busy.
- Yeah.
723
00:51:33,454 --> 00:51:35,888
All I'm saying is I could
use a little bit of help.
724
00:51:35,990 --> 00:51:38,515
If you could use a little bit
of help, why did you fire her?
725
00:51:38,626 --> 00:51:43,689
Because I had to. I'm gonna call Mrs.
Gallagher first thing and get a new nanny.
726
00:51:46,667 --> 00:51:48,396
Wow.
727
00:51:48,502 --> 00:51:51,699
The muffins are fat-free,
the eggs are free-range...
728
00:51:51,806 --> 00:51:54,536
and the bacon is extra crispy.
729
00:51:54,642 --> 00:51:58,908
- This is fantastic.
- Yeah, it looks like something out of a magazine.
730
00:51:59,013 --> 00:52:03,848
I just couldn't leave y'all with a
bad taste in your mouth about Big Momma.
731
00:52:03,951 --> 00:52:06,852
But if there's nothin' else...
732
00:52:09,757 --> 00:52:12,658
I guess-
733
00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:17,060
I guess I'll be movin' on.
734
00:52:20,901 --> 00:52:25,031
Look, Big Momma even made Poncho happy!
735
00:52:25,139 --> 00:52:27,573
Lord, that dogs higher
than a Georgia pine.
736
00:52:27,675 --> 00:52:30,610
I gotta run. Great spread, Big Momma.
737
00:52:30,711 --> 00:52:35,080
Oh, Mr. Fuller. Oh,
bye. I'll see you around.
738
00:52:35,182 --> 00:52:38,811
You're a good man, Mr.
Fuller. You're a good man!
739
00:52:38,919 --> 00:52:42,047
- Thank you. Thanks, Big Momma. Thank you. Thanks.
- Bye.
740
00:52:43,524 --> 00:52:45,492
It's so hard to say good-bye.
741
00:52:45,593 --> 00:52:49,029
- Who is that at the door this early?
742
00:52:49,130 --> 00:52:53,123
Mom, don't you remember? Allison
and Emily's mom had to go to work.
743
00:52:53,234 --> 00:52:55,634
Oh, my gosh. Are all those
girls coming here today?
744
00:52:59,073 --> 00:53:01,064
Look at em.
745
00:53:03,978 --> 00:53:06,913
I was at their last practice.
I could stay and help.
746
00:53:07,014 --> 00:53:09,141
It's no trouble.
747
00:53:11,886 --> 00:53:16,152
Okay, we gotta work this
out. I need a volunteer.
748
00:53:16,257 --> 00:53:18,748
Mrs. Fuller.
749
00:53:18,859 --> 00:53:21,987
- Yes?
- You can be my volunteer.
750
00:53:22,096 --> 00:53:25,759
Oh, gosh, Big Momma, there are
- there are things that I'm doing today.
751
00:53:25,866 --> 00:53:28,300
Well, this'll only take a second.
752
00:53:28,402 --> 00:53:32,304
Little ladies, where do you
think real dancing begins?
753
00:53:32,406 --> 00:53:34,636
Your heart?
754
00:53:34,742 --> 00:53:37,506
Well, good answer. But you
don't dance with your heart.
755
00:53:37,611 --> 00:53:41,138
You dance with your butt!
Now, lets try this again.
756
00:53:41,248 --> 00:53:43,443
What do we want, Mrs. Fuller?
757
00:53:43,551 --> 00:53:45,815
Uh, more butt?
758
00:53:45,920 --> 00:53:48,184
That's right. Try it with me.
759
00:53:48,289 --> 00:53:52,020
Sway with your butt.
Groove with the butt.
760
00:53:52,126 --> 00:53:53,923
Now, become one with the butt.
761
00:53:54,028 --> 00:53:58,522
Don't be afraid to touch it
and become one with it! Yes!
762
00:53:58,632 --> 00:54:02,329
All right! Whoo! Got butt movement
all back there. I like that.
763
00:54:02,436 --> 00:54:04,597
All right. There you go, little ladies.
764
00:54:04,705 --> 00:54:08,641
Now, lets put some music on, all right?
765
00:54:12,313 --> 00:54:14,304
Ooh! Ooh!
766
00:54:14,415 --> 00:54:17,976
That's my jam! Ooh!
767
00:54:18,085 --> 00:54:21,316
There you go with it. I
like that. Groovin' with it.
768
00:54:21,422 --> 00:54:26,155
Do your thing. That's right.
Do your thing, Mrs. Fuller!
769
00:54:26,260 --> 00:54:30,026
Yes! Come on, Mrs. Fuller.
770
00:54:35,136 --> 00:54:38,731
Whoo! Yes, indeedy! Just like that.
771
00:54:38,839 --> 00:54:41,740
That's puttin' stank on
it. That's all that is.
772
00:54:41,842 --> 00:54:44,367
Ooh. Ooh. Y'all wrap it up.
773
00:54:44,478 --> 00:54:46,969
Wrap it up.
774
00:54:47,081 --> 00:54:49,709
Ohh.
775
00:54:49,817 --> 00:54:53,275
Oh, Big Momma, these girls
are having such a good time.
776
00:54:53,387 --> 00:54:57,050
Look at Carrie. She's always so
quiet. She can't stop laughing.
777
00:54:57,158 --> 00:55:01,720
Well, I always say, laughter is
Gods hand on a troubled world.
778
00:55:03,297 --> 00:55:07,927
You know, Big Momma, I was hoping
that we could mend our fences.
779
00:55:08,035 --> 00:55:11,562
I just wanted to say that
I'm very sorry. I was wrong.
780
00:55:11,672 --> 00:55:15,301
And I was hoping you would
please consider staying here.
781
00:55:15,409 --> 00:55:18,105
Well, of course I will.
782
00:55:18,212 --> 00:55:22,080
Yes. Sure enough. Id love that.
783
00:55:24,185 --> 00:55:26,745
Big Momma, the girls and I
want to go over the dance again.
784
00:55:26,854 --> 00:55:28,947
Ooh, give me a second, all right?
785
00:55:29,056 --> 00:55:30,956
Big Momma got to catch her breath.
786
00:55:31,058 --> 00:55:34,027
- Okay.
787
00:55:34,128 --> 00:55:36,153
Oh, hey, when were done with this...
788
00:55:36,263 --> 00:55:38,288
I have the perfect place to take you.
789
00:55:38,399 --> 00:55:42,301
A spa! Look at this!
790
00:55:47,741 --> 00:55:52,303
Victoria's Secret models. They shoot the
catalog in a studio right down the street.
791
00:55:52,413 --> 00:55:54,381
They'll usually parade around naked.
792
00:55:54,481 --> 00:55:57,314
If you think about it too much,
it can get a little depressing.
793
00:55:57,418 --> 00:56:00,353
Some people just ruin it for everybody.
794
00:56:03,490 --> 00:56:07,153
What time does the paradin' begin?
795
00:56:34,521 --> 00:56:37,422
and you can just take off all
your clothes and put this on.
796
00:56:37,524 --> 00:56:39,424
I think you'll be very comfortable.
797
00:56:39,526 --> 00:56:41,585
And then you just put
your things in this locker.
798
00:56:41,695 --> 00:56:43,788
There's nothing else in
there but your things.
799
00:56:43,897 --> 00:56:46,730
There's my friend Crystal. Excuse
me one second. Hey, Crystal.
800
00:56:46,834 --> 00:56:49,234
- Hey.
- Hello. Hi.
801
00:56:49,336 --> 00:56:51,861
Tryin' to find my locker.
802
00:56:51,972 --> 00:56:55,066
Ooh. Around here somewhere.
803
00:56:55,175 --> 00:56:58,474
Ooh. Oh. Ooh.
804
00:57:10,624 --> 00:57:14,458
Excuse me. Could you give me
a hand, please, with my bra?
805
00:57:14,561 --> 00:57:18,497
I just got my nails done, and I cant-
806
00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:22,200
Here. It unhooks in
the front right here.
807
00:57:23,971 --> 00:57:25,836
Here. Will this help?
808
00:57:25,939 --> 00:57:29,602
Ooh! Ooh!
809
00:57:37,951 --> 00:57:42,820
Ooh! This is lovely!
810
00:57:42,923 --> 00:57:48,156
A room full of beautiful
women in towels and mud.
811
00:57:48,262 --> 00:57:50,389
Hey, everybody, this is Big Momma.
812
00:57:50,497 --> 00:57:53,261
- Hi.
- Oh, hello.
813
00:57:53,367 --> 00:57:57,394
Ooh, don't let me disturb you. Y'all
just keep walkin' around naked...
814
00:57:57,504 --> 00:58:00,905
and massagin' each other
in exotic oils or whatever.
815
00:58:01,942 --> 00:58:04,740
Oh, a snack.
816
00:58:04,845 --> 00:58:07,780
- No, no, no, no.
- No, Big Momma. Those are for your eyes.
817
00:58:07,881 --> 00:58:10,543
They're covered in eucalyptus sap.
818
00:58:22,563 --> 00:58:25,225
- Got it.
819
00:58:25,332 --> 00:58:29,098
Oh. Hey, listen, I was
wondering. How about a massage?
820
00:58:33,707 --> 00:58:38,041
Ahhh. I would like you to
work on my lower back here...
821
00:58:38,145 --> 00:58:40,136
because sometimes I-
822
00:58:40,247 --> 00:58:43,910
Oh, my damn! No, I wanted
the girl with the perky-
823
00:58:44,017 --> 00:58:46,952
The one with the perky
- You ain't got to push me.
824
00:58:47,054 --> 00:58:50,615
Ooh! Oh! Yes!
825
00:58:50,724 --> 00:58:54,888
I need you to get all in
the crevices, all right?
826
00:58:54,995 --> 00:58:58,396
Work that lower back like
I was telling you. Ooh!
827
00:58:58,499 --> 00:59:02,492
You know, while we've got her here,
we should get Big Momma's advice.
828
00:59:02,603 --> 00:59:05,231
That is a great idea.
829
00:59:05,339 --> 00:59:09,469
Big Momma, you were married for a
really long time. What was your secret?
830
00:59:09,576 --> 00:59:14,172
Y'all want my advice?
Well, all right. Um-
831
00:59:14,281 --> 00:59:17,341
My advice to you lovely ladies...
832
00:59:17,451 --> 00:59:21,080
on keepin' a long-lasting,
happy marriage...
833
00:59:21,188 --> 00:59:23,088
is to give it up.
834
00:59:23,190 --> 00:59:26,489
That's right. Give it up
morning, noon and night.
835
00:59:26,593 --> 00:59:29,426
- And twice on Saturday.
- What?
836
00:59:29,530 --> 00:59:32,988
I did. Shoot, before he went to work...
837
00:59:33,100 --> 00:59:36,069
in a parkin' lot down
at the Dairy Queen...
838
00:59:36,170 --> 00:59:40,334
ooh, and one time I rocked
his world at a Popeye's.
839
00:59:40,441 --> 00:59:43,535
Had him droolin' on the biscuits.
840
00:59:43,644 --> 00:59:47,444
Oh, yeah. We got us a bangy-bang on.
841
00:59:47,548 --> 00:59:50,517
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
842
00:59:50,617 --> 00:59:53,347
Ooh.
843
00:59:55,322 --> 00:59:59,053
Ooh, that's hot. Oh,
that's hot, hot, hot.
844
00:59:59,159 --> 01:00:01,992
Oh, no, that's damn hot. Hot!
845
01:00:02,095 --> 01:00:05,223
Oh, that's way too hot.
Back burnin'! Back burnin'!
846
01:00:05,332 --> 01:00:09,291
Ah! Oh, Lord! Back
burnin! Comin' through!
847
01:00:09,403 --> 01:00:12,668
- No! No! No! No!
848
01:00:12,773 --> 01:00:17,142
- Hmm.
849
01:00:29,456 --> 01:00:31,356
Thank you, Mrs. Fuller.
850
01:00:31,458 --> 01:00:34,359
- I had a good time,
except for those hot rocks.
851
01:00:34,461 --> 01:00:38,261
Now, Big Momma got some
errands to run. I'll be back.
852
01:00:38,365 --> 01:00:42,734
Oh, gosh, Big Momma. I've gotta go to the
office, and the carpet cleaners are coming.
853
01:00:42,836 --> 01:00:46,033
I was hoping you could get the kids
out of the house for a few hours.
854
01:00:46,139 --> 01:00:48,664
But I got things I got-
855
01:00:50,744 --> 01:00:53,372
Who wants to go to the beach?
856
01:01:00,153 --> 01:01:02,621
Mom'll never believe this.
857
01:01:38,392 --> 01:01:41,452
Damn, man! Put on some drawers!
858
01:01:41,562 --> 01:01:44,292
This is a family beach,
not Chippendales!
859
01:01:44,398 --> 01:01:47,128
What's wrong with you?
860
01:01:57,144 --> 01:01:59,578
Eagle One, this is Hungry Like the Wolf.
861
01:01:59,680 --> 01:02:04,140
- Come in, Eagle One.
- Kevin? Kevin!
862
01:02:04,251 --> 01:02:07,277
Yes? Yes, what?
Cop-Copy. Copy, Eagle One.
863
01:02:07,387 --> 01:02:10,823
Man, stop with the damn code
names. He ain't out here.
864
01:02:10,924 --> 01:02:13,984
Affirmative. Stopping with
the code names, Eagle One.
865
01:02:14,094 --> 01:02:17,586
Ooh, hi, babies!
866
01:02:17,698 --> 01:02:19,859
Ooh, the waters so warm.
867
01:02:19,967 --> 01:02:23,926
Big Momma, if you're done with your
walk, Andrew's eating sand again.
868
01:02:24,037 --> 01:02:27,131
You got something you
wanna say to Big Momma?
869
01:02:27,240 --> 01:02:29,333
Come on. Talk for me.
870
01:02:29,443 --> 01:02:31,809
Can you say 'ocean'?
871
01:02:33,647 --> 01:02:38,482
Why don't you take him down
and get his feet wet, all right?
872
01:02:38,585 --> 01:02:41,986
Shoo, go play. Have a good time.
873
01:02:42,089 --> 01:02:46,048
Enjoy the beach. Get sand
all in between your toes.
874
01:02:46,159 --> 01:02:49,822
Everything. I don't care. Ooh!
875
01:02:49,930 --> 01:02:53,331
Let me cop a squat here.
876
01:02:53,433 --> 01:02:55,663
Ooh!
877
01:02:55,769 --> 01:02:58,397
Ooh! I feel sexy.
878
01:02:59,906 --> 01:03:02,636
I don't want to be here.
879
01:03:02,743 --> 01:03:06,509
Really? But you look so comfortable.
880
01:03:06,613 --> 01:03:10,344
Yeah, well, this is who I am,
okay? So just get used to it.
881
01:03:10,450 --> 01:03:15,513
Ooh. Well, it might be. It
might be exactly who you are.
882
01:03:15,622 --> 01:03:18,250
Or maybe its just something
you're tryin' to be...
883
01:03:18,358 --> 01:03:21,759
to impress some boy you got
no business tryin to impress.
884
01:03:21,862 --> 01:03:24,888
Yeah, well, Chad loves me
just like this, so whatever.
885
01:03:24,998 --> 01:03:27,762
Child, you're only 15 years old.
886
01:03:27,868 --> 01:03:30,098
Truth be told, you cant spell love.
887
01:03:31,505 --> 01:03:34,235
Now, that Chad boy
- He's playin' you.
888
01:03:34,341 --> 01:03:37,833
What? Pla
- No. You don't know anything about him.
889
01:03:37,944 --> 01:03:40,504
Oh, really? Well, lets see.
890
01:03:40,614 --> 01:03:43,742
You probably met him out
with a group of friends.
891
01:03:43,850 --> 01:03:46,080
He never said anything to you.
892
01:03:46,186 --> 01:03:49,246
He just stood in the back,
lookin all mysterious.
893
01:03:49,356 --> 01:03:51,551
And he likes to call
you late at night...
894
01:03:51,658 --> 01:03:55,458
because he says you're the
last voice he wants to hear.
895
01:03:55,562 --> 01:03:57,462
How did you know that?
896
01:03:57,564 --> 01:04:02,024
Child, the players change,
but the game remains the same.
897
01:04:02,135 --> 01:04:05,070
And one day you're gonna wake up,
and you're gonna realize, Molly...
898
01:04:05,172 --> 01:04:07,640
that Big Momma got your back.
899
01:04:07,741 --> 01:04:09,766
Now, look, if you need me...
900
01:04:09,876 --> 01:04:14,575
I don't care when it is, day or
night, you just call me, okay?
901
01:04:14,681 --> 01:04:18,048
And I'll come runnin'
quick, fast and in a hurry.
902
01:04:28,929 --> 01:04:32,421
Malcolm! Malcolm! Malcolm, I got him!
903
01:04:32,532 --> 01:04:35,660
I got him! I got him!
Malcolm, Malcolm, I got him!
904
01:04:35,769 --> 01:04:38,829
Molly, why don't you take your brother
and sister down to the concession stand...
905
01:04:38,939 --> 01:04:40,964
and get em some ice cream?
906
01:04:41,074 --> 01:04:43,770
Big Momma go to stretch
one more again, okay?
907
01:04:43,877 --> 01:04:45,777
Uh-
908
01:04:45,879 --> 01:04:51,181
Freeze! F.B.I.! Hold
it right there! Hold it!
909
01:04:51,284 --> 01:04:56,620
Come here! Don't make me run after you!
910
01:04:56,723 --> 01:04:59,214
I don't like chasin' people!
911
01:05:00,961 --> 01:05:03,657
Give me that!
912
01:05:05,932 --> 01:05:08,366
Move! Get out the way! Move! Move!
913
01:05:08,468 --> 01:05:11,995
Lord have mercy! Police
business! Get out the way!
914
01:05:20,714 --> 01:05:23,979
- Ohhh!
915
01:05:39,065 --> 01:05:41,829
Oh! No!
916
01:05:46,807 --> 01:05:49,640
- Oh!
917
01:05:52,078 --> 01:05:53,978
Hold it!
918
01:05:55,916 --> 01:05:58,111
- Stop!
919
01:05:58,218 --> 01:06:00,516
Right there! Hold it right there!
920
01:06:00,620 --> 01:06:03,316
Freeze! F.B.I.! All
right, Anthony Bishop...
921
01:06:03,423 --> 01:06:05,323
I got a warrant for your arrest.
922
01:06:05,425 --> 01:06:08,223
F.B.I.? What's with the, you know?
923
01:06:08,328 --> 01:06:12,765
You're the one bein' chased. You don't get
to ask questions. Now, get off the railing.
924
01:06:12,866 --> 01:06:16,233
You don't know these guys. I roll
over on them, they'll kill me.
925
01:06:16,336 --> 01:06:18,531
- Don't worry. I can help you.
- No, you can't!
926
01:06:18,638 --> 01:06:21,698
Yes, I can. Now, don't make me come up-
927
01:06:38,859 --> 01:06:42,590
Listen, we did a full search
- Bishops hotel room, everything. There was no disk.
928
01:06:42,696 --> 01:06:44,926
Damn.
929
01:06:45,031 --> 01:06:47,090
We assume Bishop already
delivered his disk...
930
01:06:47,200 --> 01:06:50,135
which means the programs have merged, and
the worm is operational, ready for delivery.
931
01:06:50,237 --> 01:06:54,105
- We gotta get into Fullers office computer.
- I got in once. I'll do it again.
932
01:06:54,207 --> 01:06:57,870
The problem is, even if we did that, were
talking multiple levels of encryption.
933
01:06:57,978 --> 01:07:01,311
- We cant hack that.
- Way ahead of you. I'm bringin' in an outside consultant.
934
01:07:01,414 --> 01:07:04,383
He can give you the password. You
can use that to break into the system.
935
01:07:04,484 --> 01:07:07,476
My office will give you an address.
936
01:07:07,587 --> 01:07:10,147
Oh, this here is a good read.
937
01:07:10,257 --> 01:07:13,454
It got a chapter in here
that will blow your mind.
938
01:07:14,761 --> 01:07:17,161
You're losing it.
939
01:07:19,733 --> 01:07:22,429
Andrew, don't you even think ab-
940
01:07:24,504 --> 01:07:27,632
Harvard, here we come.
941
01:07:28,942 --> 01:07:31,672
Trent, I'm home!
942
01:07:51,464 --> 01:07:53,796
So, uh, his name is Stewart Nybo.
943
01:07:53,900 --> 01:07:57,165
Computer Crimes Division nailed
him hacking into a D.O.D. system...
944
01:07:57,270 --> 01:08:00,205
and then they cut him a
deal to come work for us.
945
01:08:04,544 --> 01:08:06,944
Mr. Nybo, were pretty
anxious to get started.
946
01:08:07,047 --> 01:08:09,208
- Well brief you
on the- - Stewart!
947
01:08:12,585 --> 01:08:15,850
- Yo.
- Stewart?
948
01:08:15,956 --> 01:08:19,187
Are you kidding? If I were that
little nerd, Id kill myself.
949
01:08:19,292 --> 01:08:23,160
- That's Stewart.
- Are we gonna be gone long?
950
01:08:23,263 --> 01:08:26,858
Because if so, I'll need
to bring my retainer.
951
01:08:26,967 --> 01:08:29,902
Wait a minute. You're Stewart?
952
01:08:30,003 --> 01:08:31,868
Duh.
953
01:08:33,540 --> 01:08:37,340
- Uh, this has gotta be some kind of mistake.
- Yeah, right.
954
01:08:37,444 --> 01:08:41,039
The mistake was thinking that two morons
like you can do the job in the first place.
955
01:08:41,147 --> 01:08:44,116
I'll be waiting in the car. And
if you get lost on the way...
956
01:08:44,217 --> 01:08:46,845
its the big metal
thing with four wheels.
957
01:08:49,990 --> 01:08:51,890
Did you bring the car seat?
958
01:08:51,992 --> 01:08:54,927
Uh, so, Malcolm, with this earpiece...
959
01:08:55,028 --> 01:08:57,087
we will hear everything that you hear.
960
01:08:57,197 --> 01:08:59,757
So you just get Fuller to talk, well
feed everything into the computer...
961
01:08:59,866 --> 01:09:01,891
and then hopefully well
come up with the password.
962
01:09:02,002 --> 01:09:04,493
Most people are idiots
and choose sappy passwords.
963
01:09:04,604 --> 01:09:10,042
You know, family crap
- hometowns, college stories, old girlfriends, old guy stuff.
964
01:09:11,745 --> 01:09:16,341
Eh. I'll never get them to open up
in the house. Too many distractions.
965
01:09:16,449 --> 01:09:19,976
Okay. Okay. Well, then,
you get em out of the house.
966
01:09:20,086 --> 01:09:22,384
You get them off their game...
967
01:09:22,489 --> 01:09:27,017
and then you take them to a place
where Big Momma would be in control.
968
01:09:53,353 --> 01:09:56,550
Hi.
969
01:09:56,656 --> 01:09:59,921
B-2.
B-2.
970
01:10:00,026 --> 01:10:02,221
Bingo! Bingo! Bingo!
971
01:10:05,899 --> 01:10:08,459
Carrie, baby.
972
01:10:08,568 --> 01:10:11,833
No, you don't yell out
'bingo' if you don't have it.
973
01:10:11,938 --> 01:10:14,236
Bingo people get a little testy.
974
01:10:14,340 --> 01:10:16,467
She's just a child, and
it won't happen again.
975
01:10:18,945 --> 01:10:21,914
Damn right it wont happen again!
976
01:10:23,516 --> 01:10:25,643
Come on, baby.
977
01:10:32,025 --> 01:10:36,860
- Get it.
- What do you mean, get it?
978
01:10:38,565 --> 01:10:41,295
She needs a flea rinse. Turbo dry.
979
01:10:41,401 --> 01:10:44,097
Oh, and can you shave her pads for me?
980
01:10:46,306 --> 01:10:48,536
Were supposed to be
dog groomers, you idiot.
981
01:10:48,641 --> 01:10:51,303
Yes. Yes. She's in excellent hands, sir.
982
01:10:51,411 --> 01:10:53,971
You have a great day. Bye-bye now.
983
01:10:54,080 --> 01:10:56,480
Um...
984
01:10:56,583 --> 01:10:59,848
okay, okay.
985
01:11:01,588 --> 01:11:04,182
You've gotta be kidding me.
986
01:11:06,426 --> 01:11:11,523
Come here. Okay, clip the
nails. Flush the ears. Bye- bye.
987
01:11:13,199 --> 01:11:16,498
B-14.
B-1-4. - Ooh.
988
01:11:16,603 --> 01:11:19,333
Ask him where he was born, Malcolm.
989
01:11:19,439 --> 01:11:22,897
Oh, so, Mr. Fuller, where
did you say you were from?
990
01:11:23,009 --> 01:11:26,740
- Shhh!
- G-55.
991
01:11:26,846 --> 01:11:30,509
- Long Island.
- Long Island, New York.
992
01:11:30,617 --> 01:11:33,518
Birthplace of Mariah Carey.
993
01:11:33,620 --> 01:11:35,918
Long Island. Try Long Island.
994
01:11:36,022 --> 01:11:38,513
Nothing.
995
01:11:38,625 --> 01:11:41,890
Oh! Oh, Malcolm, he went to
Princeton. Get him to talk about that.
996
01:11:41,995 --> 01:11:43,986
So I hear you was a Princeton Tiger.
997
01:11:44,097 --> 01:11:47,032
What activities were you in?
998
01:11:47,133 --> 01:11:49,533
- Shhh! Do you
mind? - B-9.
999
01:11:49,636 --> 01:11:52,230
All these people up in here
screamin', and you're gonna shush me?
1000
01:11:52,338 --> 01:11:56,069
I should stomp a mud hole
in your little bald head.
1001
01:11:56,176 --> 01:12:01,239
'Hattie Mae Pierce! But
you can call me Big Momma.
1002
01:12:01,347 --> 01:12:04,373
Everybody calls me Big Momma. '
1003
01:12:04,484 --> 01:12:09,046
- N-42. - Big Momma, do
you even know this lady?
1004
01:12:09,155 --> 01:12:12,283
- No.
- Oh, you know me, Hattie Mae.
1005
01:12:12,392 --> 01:12:15,361
- You know
me. - Uh-oh.
1006
01:12:15,461 --> 01:12:17,952
She knows you. I mean,
she knows Big Momma.
1007
01:12:18,064 --> 01:12:21,363
Uh, sure.
1008
01:12:21,467 --> 01:12:24,197
As in, uh, old friend?
1009
01:12:24,304 --> 01:12:26,135
A uncle? Aunt?
1010
01:12:26,239 --> 01:12:28,434
I swore on the lives
of my grandbabies...
1011
01:12:28,541 --> 01:12:32,443
that if I ever saw you again,
I would beat you like a drum.
1012
01:12:32,545 --> 01:12:34,479
- N
- 40.
1013
01:12:34,581 --> 01:12:38,210
- How does she know Big Momma?
- Malcolm, do not let her blow your cover. Do you hear me?
1014
01:12:38,318 --> 01:12:40,149
I repeat
- Do not let her blow your cover.
1015
01:12:40,253 --> 01:12:43,381
Now, do you want that beatin'
here or out in the street?
1016
01:12:43,489 --> 01:12:47,289
It don't make me no never mind. Come on.
1017
01:12:47,393 --> 01:12:49,725
Maybe you should go
have a few more drinks.
1018
01:12:49,829 --> 01:12:54,562
You got somethin that belongs to
me, Hattie Mae, and I want it back.
1019
01:12:54,667 --> 01:12:57,568
- What does she want back?
- I have no idea.
1020
01:12:57,670 --> 01:13:00,935
You stole my man.
1021
01:13:02,008 --> 01:13:05,136
- Your man?
- That's right. My man.
1022
01:13:05,245 --> 01:13:09,147
- She stole her man.
- Big Momma stole your man?
1023
01:13:09,249 --> 01:13:11,809
Is that true, Big Momma?
1024
01:13:11,918 --> 01:13:16,821
Uh, maybe. Um, but I
know I gave him back.
1025
01:13:16,923 --> 01:13:21,917
I clare, I never knew what
Ben Rawley saw in you anyway.
1026
01:13:22,028 --> 01:13:24,997
You cant help it if you're ugly...
1027
01:13:25,098 --> 01:13:27,965
but that don't mean you gotta go out.
1028
01:13:28,067 --> 01:13:32,800
And besides, you look like you
packed on a few pounds over the years.
1029
01:13:32,905 --> 01:13:35,373
- You watch your mouth when you talkin to me!
- Ladies, ladies.
1030
01:13:35,475 --> 01:13:38,308
- You don't know me!
- Please! Would you take your seat over there, please?
1031
01:13:38,411 --> 01:13:41,278
Malcolm, Malcolm, listen to
me. You are not Big Momma, okay?
1032
01:13:41,381 --> 01:13:45,841
You are a highly trained field operative, and
you do not throw down with a 65- year-old woman!
1033
01:13:45,952 --> 01:13:50,719
- That would be cool to watch.
- You know what? My momma raised a lady.
1034
01:13:50,823 --> 01:13:55,157
Oh, no, she didn't. She raised a heifer!
1035
01:13:55,261 --> 01:13:56,990
- Now,
wa- - Oh!
1036
01:13:57,096 --> 01:13:59,564
- Damn!
- Ow!
1037
01:13:59,666 --> 01:14:02,066
- Oh!
- Oh!
1038
01:14:06,606 --> 01:14:09,507
Oh, no. I'm goin' down.
1039
01:14:10,743 --> 01:14:12,802
- Oh, shit.
- Oh, man.
1040
01:14:16,783 --> 01:14:20,014
- Big Momma. Big Momma.
1041
01:14:20,119 --> 01:14:23,316
Ohhh, he said 'Big Momma. '
1042
01:14:23,423 --> 01:14:25,823
His first words, and
he said 'Big Momma. '
1043
01:14:25,925 --> 01:14:29,691
Hey, the kid talked! Excellent!
1044
01:14:29,796 --> 01:14:32,230
- I am so proud of you.
- Stake out.
1045
01:14:32,332 --> 01:14:34,596
- What did you say?
- Stake out.
1046
01:14:34,701 --> 01:14:37,495
- What?
- Investigate.
1047
01:14:37,603 --> 01:14:40,868
- This is really not good.
- Turner.
1048
01:14:40,973 --> 01:14:43,441
Oh, my God. This is not good.
1049
01:14:43,543 --> 01:14:45,511
- F.B.-
- Oh!
1050
01:14:45,611 --> 01:14:48,341
We don't want him to use up
all his words on the first day.
1051
01:14:48,448 --> 01:14:51,747
Wait, Big Momma. I wanna hear what
he has to say. What did you say?
1052
01:14:57,056 --> 01:14:59,081
- Bingo!
1053
01:14:59,192 --> 01:15:00,955
Bingo!
1054
01:15:01,060 --> 01:15:02,960
Yes! Yes! Were back in.
1055
01:15:03,062 --> 01:15:04,962
Were back in.
1056
01:15:05,064 --> 01:15:07,726
- Oh.
- Wow. Great.
1057
01:15:07,834 --> 01:15:11,395
- Uh
- Yeah?
1058
01:15:12,805 --> 01:15:14,864
Yeah, I'll be right down.
1059
01:15:14,974 --> 01:15:19,274
What? Tom, no. Your son
just spoke his first words.
1060
01:15:19,379 --> 01:15:22,974
- Tell your boss you cant come in.
- I don't have a choice.
1061
01:15:23,082 --> 01:15:26,176
Well, fine. Were gonna stay
here and keep playing though.
1062
01:15:26,285 --> 01:15:29,220
- Suit yourself.
- Malcolm, we still don't have the password.
1063
01:15:29,322 --> 01:15:31,620
You've gotta get it,
and you gotta get it now.
1064
01:15:31,724 --> 01:15:34,716
Mr. Fuller, wait. Can you
carry me to prayer meetin'?
1065
01:15:34,827 --> 01:15:36,988
It's at that church right by your office.
1066
01:15:37,096 --> 01:15:39,087
Church by my office? Are you sure?
1067
01:15:39,198 --> 01:15:41,291
I think I know my own church!
1068
01:15:41,401 --> 01:15:43,426
No, no, no. Hey, we
gotta follow in the van.
1069
01:15:43,536 --> 01:15:47,097
- What are we gonna do about all these dogs?
- Well bring 'em back in an hour.
1070
01:15:47,206 --> 01:15:49,936
Just tie em down or
something, and let's go.
1071
01:15:50,042 --> 01:15:53,239
- Oh, God.
- Oh! Ew!
1072
01:15:53,346 --> 01:15:56,281
Who was that? Was that?
Mona? Mona, was that you?
1073
01:16:03,289 --> 01:16:06,190
Oooh.
1074
01:16:06,292 --> 01:16:09,728
- That's a nice family you got back there.
- Yeah.
1075
01:16:09,829 --> 01:16:15,062
The reason I point it out
- because I'm not sure you're around enough to notice.
1076
01:16:15,168 --> 01:16:19,161
Okay, I deserve that.
1077
01:16:19,272 --> 01:16:23,732
My dad worked all the time
too. Hardly ever saw the man.
1078
01:16:23,843 --> 01:16:28,871
I swore that I was gonna be different,
but, uh, its easier than I thought.
1079
01:16:28,981 --> 01:16:31,882
- What?
- Working.
1080
01:16:31,984 --> 01:16:34,179
I'm good at what I do. Real good.
1081
01:16:34,287 --> 01:16:36,653
I know all the answers.
1082
01:16:36,756 --> 01:16:39,953
Well, at least I used to.
1083
01:16:40,059 --> 01:16:43,358
- Used to? - You think you
have all the bases covered-
1084
01:16:43,463 --> 01:16:46,057
that you're invulnerable.
1085
01:16:46,165 --> 01:16:51,068
Then one day someone comes
along who knows where to lean.
1086
01:16:56,142 --> 01:16:58,872
Are you sure this is your church?
1087
01:16:58,978 --> 01:17:01,173
I know my own-
1088
01:17:06,018 --> 01:17:09,146
Of course it is. I'm half Jewish.
1089
01:17:09,255 --> 01:17:11,985
You got a problem with
that? You anti- Semitic-
1090
01:17:12,091 --> 01:17:14,821
Hey, hey, hey. No, no. Of
course not. Everything's cool.
1091
01:17:14,927 --> 01:17:17,259
That's some nice bling you got on there.
1092
01:17:17,363 --> 01:17:21,026
Oh, its a class ring. Oklahoma.
1093
01:17:21,133 --> 01:17:23,328
But I thought you said
you went to Princeton.
1094
01:17:23,436 --> 01:17:28,339
It was my fathers. For all that
work, this is all that's left.
1095
01:17:31,277 --> 01:17:34,371
- Well, thanks for the ride.
- Yeah.
1096
01:17:35,648 --> 01:17:38,014
All right. Bye-bye.
1097
01:17:40,386 --> 01:17:42,980
- L chaim.
- Shalom.
1098
01:17:43,089 --> 01:17:45,922
L chaim.
1099
01:17:46,025 --> 01:17:48,789
Uh, yeah.
1100
01:17:48,895 --> 01:17:51,887
- Where you at? - Thank God.
Thank God you're alive. Where-
1101
01:17:51,998 --> 01:17:54,125
- I got it. Sooners.
- What?
1102
01:17:54,233 --> 01:17:56,963
His dad, his ring. Just
tell Stewart to try it.
1103
01:17:57,069 --> 01:18:01,472
Try 'Sooners. '
S- O- O-N-E-R- S.
1104
01:18:01,574 --> 01:18:04,372
I'm in!
1105
01:18:04,477 --> 01:18:06,809
- Oh, no.
- 'Oh, no'?
1106
01:18:06,913 --> 01:18:09,711
The password got us in the door,
and then the walls came down.
1107
01:18:09,815 --> 01:18:12,045
It's like a booby trap. We're stuck.
1108
01:18:12,151 --> 01:18:15,120
- How about the satellite?
- That'll work.
1109
01:18:15,221 --> 01:18:19,590
Call Morales. Tell her well need tech
support and a full tactical package.
1110
01:18:19,692 --> 01:18:21,751
- Pick me up on the way.
- Where you at?
1111
01:18:21,861 --> 01:18:24,830
I'm at temple.
1112
01:18:24,931 --> 01:18:27,161
Oh, temple. Well, Shabbat shalom.
1113
01:18:27,266 --> 01:18:29,166
Lets go.
1114
01:18:44,350 --> 01:18:47,751
- What's happening?
- We've got access to all Agenda security camera feeds.
1115
01:18:47,853 --> 01:18:50,481
- Were in.
- Okay. Where's Fuller?
1116
01:18:50,590 --> 01:18:53,821
He and Casal are still in Fullers office.
We're hooked into the surveillance cameras.
1117
01:18:53,926 --> 01:18:56,759
- So if he moves, well know about it.
- Good.
1118
01:18:56,862 --> 01:19:01,822
Hey, Stewart! I thought you were some kind
of genius. How long is this gonna take?
1119
01:19:01,934 --> 01:19:04,596
What do you think I'm tryin'
to do here? Get free HBO?
1120
01:19:04,704 --> 01:19:07,434
This stuff s hard. Give me some room.
1121
01:19:13,879 --> 01:19:17,042
- Hello?
- Big Momma, is that you?
1122
01:19:17,149 --> 01:19:20,710
Oh, course it is. Where are you?
1123
01:19:20,820 --> 01:19:23,687
Listen. I'm at this
club called The Zone.
1124
01:19:23,789 --> 01:19:27,281
And I'm really scared right now.
Can you please come and help me?
1125
01:19:28,661 --> 01:19:30,925
- Molly?
- What's wrong?
1126
01:19:31,030 --> 01:19:33,794
- She's in some kind of trouble.
- What? Who?
1127
01:19:33,899 --> 01:19:36,367
- Wait. What are you doing?
- I gotta go.
1128
01:19:36,469 --> 01:19:39,063
- What the hell are you talkin about?
- Look.
1129
01:19:39,171 --> 01:19:41,571
I promised that child that
I would be there for her.
1130
01:19:41,674 --> 01:19:44,541
You're not going anywhere,
and that's an order!
1131
01:19:44,644 --> 01:19:47,169
Well, that's an order I can't follow.
1132
01:19:47,279 --> 01:19:49,179
Turner! Turner, you are on thin ice!
1133
01:19:49,281 --> 01:19:51,181
We are in the middle
of this investigation!
1134
01:19:51,283 --> 01:19:53,183
What do you care about
some bratty teenager anyway?
1135
01:19:53,285 --> 01:19:56,914
Don't nobody mess with
Big Momma's babies. Nobody!
1136
01:20:10,436 --> 01:20:14,805
Excuse me. Pardon me.
Um, excuse me. Pardon me.
1137
01:20:14,907 --> 01:20:18,934
Excuse me. Thank you. Pardon me. Molly?
1138
01:20:22,381 --> 01:20:26,317
Excuse me, darlin', but
that's my leg you're humpin'..
1139
01:20:26,419 --> 01:20:30,287
Ooh, young people just so nasty today!
1140
01:20:32,825 --> 01:20:35,293
You wanna back up off this girl...
1141
01:20:35,394 --> 01:20:37,624
fore I knock the taste out your mouth.
1142
01:20:37,730 --> 01:20:41,632
Molly, what are you doin here anyway?
This is not the way you were raised.
1143
01:20:41,734 --> 01:20:44,532
I know. I know. But I got
a text message from Chad.
1144
01:20:44,637 --> 01:20:46,696
- Chad? Oh, Lord! - He
said to meet him here-
1145
01:20:46,806 --> 01:20:51,266
You know what? You and Chad are
gonna run my blood pressure up.
1146
01:20:51,377 --> 01:20:55,313
- Molly!
- Hey, where have you been? I got really scared.
1147
01:20:55,414 --> 01:20:59,942
Molly, I came here as soon as you called.
I swear I didn't send you a message.
1148
01:21:00,052 --> 01:21:02,577
I mean, I've never even
heard of this place.
1149
01:21:02,688 --> 01:21:04,588
- What?
- Wait a minute.
1150
01:21:04,690 --> 01:21:06,817
If you didn't send the
message, then who did?
1151
01:21:06,926 --> 01:21:10,418
Oh, wow. That's
- That guy works for my dad.
1152
01:21:10,529 --> 01:21:12,554
What's he doing here?
1153
01:21:14,366 --> 01:21:16,266
Molly, he's after you.
1154
01:21:16,368 --> 01:21:19,098
- Chad, I need you to run and get some help.
- All right.
1155
01:21:19,205 --> 01:21:22,800
Molly, I gotta get you out of here as fast
as possible. Come on, Molly. Excuse me.
1156
01:21:22,908 --> 01:21:24,933
Comin through.
1157
01:21:26,746 --> 01:21:28,737
Oh, God!
1158
01:21:30,783 --> 01:21:33,775
Is this what you do? Beat up
on children and old ladies?
1159
01:21:33,886 --> 01:21:35,751
Mmm. Go.
1160
01:21:39,291 --> 01:21:42,283
I don't understand. What's
happening? What did I do?
1161
01:21:42,394 --> 01:21:47,093
Look, I'll explain everything to you later.
But for right now, watch out. I'm rollin'!
1162
01:21:47,199 --> 01:21:50,965
- No! Ugh!
1163
01:21:51,070 --> 01:21:54,198
- I cant feel my legs.
- Oh, sorry. Oh!
1164
01:21:54,306 --> 01:21:56,604
- Oh, no! Oh!
1165
01:21:58,377 --> 01:22:00,777
- Ooh!
1166
01:22:00,880 --> 01:22:03,872
Oh, God, this is not
how I imagined my death.
1167
01:22:03,983 --> 01:22:08,181
- Oh! Oh!
- Oh, God!
1168
01:22:13,492 --> 01:22:15,790
So get this. He's not really 19.
1169
01:22:15,895 --> 01:22:19,729
- Hmm?
- Chad.
1170
01:22:19,832 --> 01:22:22,062
It's a fake I.D. He told me last night.
1171
01:22:22,168 --> 01:22:24,693
He said he didn't want
any more lies between us.
1172
01:22:24,804 --> 01:22:27,534
Like his earring? Fake.
1173
01:22:27,640 --> 01:22:31,201
The three months he said he spent
in juvie, he was at math camp.
1174
01:22:31,310 --> 01:22:36,714
I guess people aren't always what
- what you think they are.
1175
01:22:36,816 --> 01:22:39,080
- Yeah, like you.
- Me?
1176
01:22:39,185 --> 01:22:43,315
Yeah. I didn't think you'd turn
out to be such a good friend.
1177
01:22:43,422 --> 01:22:45,322
Oh.
1178
01:22:55,701 --> 01:22:58,966
They're gone. Now I need your help.
1179
01:22:59,071 --> 01:23:01,539
Um, I got a
- I got a blade in my girdle.
1180
01:23:01,640 --> 01:23:04,404
Wait. Okay, you carry a gun?
1181
01:23:04,510 --> 01:23:06,774
And you keep a blade in your
girdle? What's that about?
1182
01:23:06,879 --> 01:23:09,780
Um, to protect my virtue.
1183
01:23:09,882 --> 01:23:12,715
Does it really need
that much protecting?
1184
01:23:12,818 --> 01:23:16,754
Would you just get over here? Come on.
1185
01:23:24,330 --> 01:23:27,925
Ah, that would be our
buyer. Right on time.
1186
01:23:29,869 --> 01:23:33,532
Since you never really bought into our
little project, precautions had to be taken.
1187
01:23:33,639 --> 01:23:37,439
- What do you mean?
- We have your daughter, Molly.
1188
01:23:40,346 --> 01:23:42,314
Bastard!
1189
01:23:51,423 --> 01:23:55,086
Call the F.B.I. Ask for a woman
by the name of Morales, okay?
1190
01:23:55,194 --> 01:23:57,822
And stay on the line so
they can trace the call. Go.
1191
01:24:18,050 --> 01:24:20,245
Very nice.
1192
01:24:21,921 --> 01:24:24,583
But, uh, were not through, are we?
1193
01:24:24,690 --> 01:24:27,682
No, were not.
1194
01:24:27,793 --> 01:24:30,694
I'm afraid his contract had
a 'no loose ends' clause.
1195
01:24:30,796 --> 01:24:32,696
No. No, no, no. Please listen.
1196
01:24:32,798 --> 01:24:36,290
Please. Look, I promise I wont say
anything. I swear. I won't say anything.
1197
01:24:36,402 --> 01:24:38,597
- What is that?
1198
01:24:41,573 --> 01:24:43,473
Is that your nanny?
1199
01:24:58,924 --> 01:25:00,983
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1200
01:25:01,093 --> 01:25:04,187
- How did you learn to do that?
- I took a class at the Y.M.C.A.
1201
01:25:05,431 --> 01:25:07,331
Look, lets go. Come on.
1202
01:25:12,004 --> 01:25:14,165
That must be some 'Y'.
1203
01:25:54,346 --> 01:25:56,507
Sorry. Sorry.
1204
01:25:56,615 --> 01:25:58,640
That was,
uh- I mean-
1205
01:25:58,751 --> 01:26:00,719
- You just need to stay out of sight.
- Yeah.
1206
01:26:00,819 --> 01:26:03,344
- Stay out of sight!
- I will. Yeah. Yeah.
1207
01:26:08,994 --> 01:26:13,363
Wow. She's like the best nanny ever.
1208
01:26:26,945 --> 01:26:31,575
Oh, my God.
1209
01:26:31,683 --> 01:26:35,244
I knew that thong would come in handy.
1210
01:26:49,835 --> 01:26:52,235
Whoa!
1211
01:27:09,788 --> 01:27:11,779
Big Momma? Big Momma, you okay?
1212
01:27:12,858 --> 01:27:17,192
Tom, no loose ends.
1213
01:27:22,901 --> 01:27:25,426
Lets go. Secure the area!
1214
01:27:25,537 --> 01:27:30,372
- Big Momma? Big Momma?
- Go to the left. Up! Up!
1215
01:27:30,476 --> 01:27:33,343
Stand back. Stand back.
1216
01:27:33,445 --> 01:27:37,779
I'm going to have to
perform... mouth-to-mouth.
1217
01:27:37,883 --> 01:27:42,183
The hell you are! What, are you crazy?
1218
01:27:44,123 --> 01:27:47,058
Whoa. Whoa! Oh!
1219
01:27:47,159 --> 01:27:50,651
Okay, this explains so much.
1220
01:27:52,431 --> 01:27:54,956
I believe this was meant for you.
1221
01:27:55,067 --> 01:27:58,662
- So you're,
uh- - F.B.I.
1222
01:28:03,509 --> 01:28:05,875
Before you guys get too
comfortable over here, cuff him.
1223
01:28:05,978 --> 01:28:09,709
Whoa, whoa. Um, they
forced him to do it.
1224
01:28:09,815 --> 01:28:12,807
They told him if he didn't
do it, they'd kill his family.
1225
01:28:14,286 --> 01:28:16,186
So, in your report-
1226
01:28:16,288 --> 01:28:19,155
I'll say he was an unwilling
participant to the whole thing.
1227
01:28:19,258 --> 01:28:21,988
So no charges should be filed.
1228
01:28:22,094 --> 01:28:25,154
No charges?
1229
01:28:28,467 --> 01:28:31,868
Okay. I guess I owe you that much.
1230
01:28:31,970 --> 01:28:35,371
- All right.
- Good job, Turner.
1231
01:28:35,474 --> 01:28:37,499
Thank you.
1232
01:28:42,314 --> 01:28:44,509
She said good job.
1233
01:28:46,451 --> 01:28:49,784
Um, thank you. Thank you
for standing up for me.
1234
01:28:49,888 --> 01:28:52,379
What makes you think
- Look.
1235
01:28:52,491 --> 01:28:54,459
I didn't do it for you, okay?
1236
01:28:54,560 --> 01:28:57,188
I did it so your kids wouldn't
spend the next 20 years...
1237
01:28:57,296 --> 01:29:00,026
- talking to you through a prison phone.
- I know.
1238
01:29:00,132 --> 01:29:02,930
I know I've got a lot of ground to
make up with them, and I swear I will.
1239
01:29:03,035 --> 01:29:05,401
Good.
1240
01:29:05,504 --> 01:29:09,873
So, looks like were gonna have
to find ourselves a new nanny.
1241
01:29:11,310 --> 01:29:13,904
Not quite yet.
1242
01:29:14,012 --> 01:29:17,743
I got one more promise to keep.
1243
01:29:23,155 --> 01:29:25,055
Dad!
1244
01:29:48,947 --> 01:29:51,609
Well! Well, I hope
you girls are ready...
1245
01:29:51,717 --> 01:29:54,242
cause I came to see a show.
1246
01:29:54,353 --> 01:29:56,287
Big Momma, we got a problem!
1247
01:29:56,388 --> 01:30:00,586
Miss Lisa was our base. Without
a base, we cant do any stunts.
1248
01:30:03,362 --> 01:30:07,458
What did you do to
yourself?. Lord, have-
1249
01:30:07,566 --> 01:30:10,034
Well, no worries. No worries.
1250
01:30:10,135 --> 01:30:13,298
Were gonna turn it out. Come on.
1251
01:30:13,405 --> 01:30:17,432
And now, the junior cheer
squad from the Newport District.
1252
01:30:17,542 --> 01:30:20,670
Lets give it up for Emerson!
1253
01:31:50,669 --> 01:31:54,469
- Whoo!
1254
01:31:54,573 --> 01:31:58,976
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
1255
01:32:05,484 --> 01:32:09,420
- What?
- Andrew, no!
1256
01:32:11,890 --> 01:32:13,881
Hi, Big Momma.
1257
01:32:17,662 --> 01:32:19,960
- Ooh.
- That was fun!
1258
01:32:20,065 --> 01:32:22,363
Lets do it again.
1259
01:32:25,704 --> 01:32:29,105
It hurts me to leave
without saying good-bye...
1260
01:32:29,207 --> 01:32:31,767
but I best be movin' on.
1261
01:32:36,648 --> 01:32:39,811
when I came to you, my heart was heavy.
1262
01:32:41,853 --> 01:32:45,186
It's a loud, noisy world we live in...
1263
01:32:45,290 --> 01:32:47,781
and sometimes we lose our way.
1264
01:32:47,893 --> 01:32:50,123
But if were lucky...
1265
01:32:50,228 --> 01:32:53,288
the good Lord sends
someone to bring us home.
1266
01:32:55,066 --> 01:32:57,534
Make no never mind about it.
1267
01:32:57,636 --> 01:33:00,730
Loving people is hard work.
1268
01:33:00,839 --> 01:33:02,966
And families-
1269
01:33:03,074 --> 01:33:06,134
With all those lives mixin' together...
1270
01:33:06,244 --> 01:33:08,474
it gets kinda scary.
1271
01:33:21,193 --> 01:33:25,357
But if we grab hold of
each other and hold on-
1272
01:33:27,499 --> 01:33:31,026
There's nothin' more
beautiful in the world.
1273
01:33:31,136 --> 01:33:34,902
You angels are my heart,
and I'll never forget you.
1274
01:33:36,475 --> 01:33:38,602
And keep a lookout.
1275
01:33:38,710 --> 01:33:42,737
You never know when
Big Momma might be back.
96888