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Femme Fatales 01x11
Till Death Do Us Part Original Air Date on July 22, 2011
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00:00:13,982 --> 00:00:17,982
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
3
00:00:51,813 --> 00:00:53,213
[grunts]
4
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,655
[sighs]
5
00:01:34,197 --> 00:01:35,164
[sighs]
6
00:01:35,198 --> 00:01:37,700
Baby, when did you get here?
7
00:01:47,712 --> 00:01:49,247
[gasps]
8
00:02:00,794 --> 00:02:03,597
♪ I've got my eye on you ♪
9
00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:07,634
♪ I've got my eye on you ♪
10
00:02:09,104 --> 00:02:12,541
♪ And I'm hooked,dear, too ♪
11
00:02:12,575 --> 00:02:15,077
♪ Your fooling around's ♪
12
00:02:15,111 --> 00:02:18,047
♪ Getting bloodon my shoes, oh ♪
13
00:02:19,016 --> 00:02:22,219
♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪
14
00:02:23,121 --> 00:02:24,955
♪ Whoa-oa ♪
15
00:02:26,492 --> 00:02:29,895
♪ I've set my sights on you ♪
16
00:02:31,164 --> 00:02:34,000
♪ I've set my sights on you ♪
17
00:02:35,235 --> 00:02:38,739
♪ I've got an alibi, too ♪
18
00:02:39,774 --> 00:02:41,442
♪ So don't look around ♪
19
00:02:41,476 --> 00:02:44,178
♪ I've got nothing to lose ♪
20
00:02:44,212 --> 00:02:48,348
♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪
21
00:02:49,717 --> 00:02:53,820
♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪
22
00:02:53,855 --> 00:02:55,922
♪ Whoa-oa ♪
23
00:02:57,525 --> 00:03:02,262
♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪
24
00:03:02,297 --> 00:03:04,031
♪ Whoa-oa ♪
25
00:03:04,065 --> 00:03:05,666
[gunshot]
26
00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:12,974
Aloha.
27
00:03:13,008 --> 00:03:15,209
I see you've met Rachel Worth.
28
00:03:15,244 --> 00:03:17,044
Poor thing.
29
00:03:17,079 --> 00:03:19,680
Can you believe
it's her wedding day?
30
00:03:19,715 --> 00:03:21,983
Certainly not
a very auspicious start.
31
00:03:22,017 --> 00:03:23,952
A bride needs
something borrowed,
32
00:03:23,986 --> 00:03:25,153
something blue,
33
00:03:25,188 --> 00:03:27,189
but certainly not
something dead.
34
00:03:27,223 --> 00:03:29,158
I guess the silver lining
in all of this
35
00:03:29,192 --> 00:03:32,428
is the corpse is not the man
she's planning to marry.
36
00:03:33,530 --> 00:03:35,064
But with her ceremony
37
00:03:35,099 --> 00:03:36,967
on a private beach
near Waikiki
38
00:03:37,001 --> 00:03:39,536
looming in six hours,
39
00:03:39,571 --> 00:03:42,539
she best fix this little hiccup
that's threatening her big day.
40
00:03:42,574 --> 00:03:45,275
Otherwise, there could very
well be a whole new meaning
41
00:03:45,310 --> 00:03:48,511
to the phrase,
"Till death do us part."
42
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:54,383
[panting]
43
00:03:54,417 --> 00:03:56,852
Phone. Phone.
44
00:03:57,854 --> 00:03:59,954
Where's my fucking phone?
45
00:04:03,593 --> 00:04:04,827
Okay.
46
00:04:12,270 --> 00:04:13,804
[muttering]
47
00:04:15,307 --> 00:04:18,009
Okay. Okay.
[dialing]
48
00:04:21,448 --> 00:04:23,482
Cam! Cam, it's me!
49
00:04:23,517 --> 00:04:24,550
Come to the house!♪ [rock]
50
00:04:24,584 --> 00:04:26,619
Babe, are you okay?
I can't hear.
51
00:04:26,662 --> 00:04:29,413
There's no reception,
and the music's too loud.
52
00:04:29,456 --> 00:04:31,824
Listen, my bachelor party's
still going on, but I promise--
53
00:04:31,858 --> 00:04:34,260
Don't worry.
I'll be sober by the morn--
54
00:04:34,294 --> 00:04:36,128
[phone clatters]
55
00:04:36,162 --> 00:04:37,830
Cam. Cam!
56
00:04:37,864 --> 00:04:39,931
Really? That's funny?
57
00:04:39,966 --> 00:04:42,100
You made out
with a tranny last night.
58
00:04:43,069 --> 00:04:45,171
[sighing]
59
00:04:46,540 --> 00:04:47,674
Okay.
60
00:04:52,046 --> 00:04:54,080
[pants]
61
00:05:07,495 --> 00:05:09,562
[moaning]
62
00:06:46,723 --> 00:06:48,924
Please tell me we still get
to have sex like that
63
00:06:48,959 --> 00:06:50,994
after we're married.
64
00:06:51,028 --> 00:06:52,529
We better.
65
00:06:52,564 --> 00:06:54,965
It's a husband's duty
to please his woman.
66
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,368
Oh, really?
Uh-huh.
67
00:06:57,402 --> 00:06:59,170
I can't believe
by this time tomorrow
68
00:06:59,204 --> 00:07:02,039
we're going to be
Mr. and Mrs. Cam Engelhardt.
69
00:07:02,074 --> 00:07:03,607
Finally.
I thought we were gonna
70
00:07:03,642 --> 00:07:05,843
have to get you
new business cards made up.
71
00:07:05,877 --> 00:07:08,112
"Cam Engelhardt,
Corporate Attorney,
72
00:07:08,146 --> 00:07:09,246
Commitment Phobe."
73
00:07:09,281 --> 00:07:11,248
Well, after tonight,
I'm all yours.
74
00:07:11,283 --> 00:07:13,485
Ah-ah-ah. Just remember.
75
00:07:13,519 --> 00:07:16,121
We agreed. One lap dance.
76
00:07:16,155 --> 00:07:17,397
Yeah, about that.
77
00:07:17,422 --> 00:07:20,857
How about one
lap dance and a B.J.?
78
00:07:21,126 --> 00:07:23,495
I'm a lawyer.
I negotiate.
79
00:07:23,529 --> 00:07:26,531
It's what I do.
It's all so tacky.
80
00:07:26,566 --> 00:07:29,501
Oh, I hope
they don't get a stripper.
81
00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:32,838
I just want to sit
by the pool and relax
82
00:07:32,872 --> 00:07:34,739
and miss you.
83
00:07:37,476 --> 00:07:39,877
Do I really have to go do
this whole bachelorette party?
84
00:07:39,912 --> 00:07:43,180
Yes. My sister's gone all-out.
You have to go.
85
00:07:43,215 --> 00:07:44,682
[knock on door]
86
00:07:44,716 --> 00:07:48,786
Which is why I told them
where to find you.
87
00:07:48,821 --> 00:07:51,389
[Woman] Whoo-hoo! Come on.
What are you guys doing?
88
00:07:51,423 --> 00:07:54,392
What is this?
It's party time.
89
00:07:54,426 --> 00:07:57,262
Check-in is at 3,
and I want maximum pool time.
90
00:07:57,296 --> 00:08:00,832
You just stop molesting
my bro, okay?
91
00:08:00,866 --> 00:08:02,233
Okay, coming.
92
00:08:02,267 --> 00:08:04,101
Happy birthday, Cam.
93
00:08:06,304 --> 00:08:08,472
See you later.
Okay.
94
00:08:08,506 --> 00:08:10,874
Hi. This is Rachel Worth.
95
00:08:10,909 --> 00:08:14,110
I'm one of the women staying
at your vacation rental.
96
00:08:14,145 --> 00:08:17,613
There's a problem that I really
need to talk to you about,
97
00:08:17,648 --> 00:08:19,482
so if you get this message,
98
00:08:19,516 --> 00:08:23,485
please call me back
here at the house.
99
00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:25,220
Thank you.
100
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:26,655
Okay, call me back.
101
00:08:26,689 --> 00:08:28,022
Okay, bye.
102
00:08:28,057 --> 00:08:29,257
[beeps]
103
00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:31,593
[Woman]
Whoo-hoo!
104
00:08:31,627 --> 00:08:34,461
This is
the entertainment area.
105
00:08:36,097 --> 00:08:38,399
Fire pit over there,
trampoline.
106
00:08:38,433 --> 00:08:40,734
We get to use that, right?
Yeah, yeah.
107
00:08:40,769 --> 00:08:43,637
You got a famous trampoline.
If that trampoline could talk...
108
00:08:43,671 --> 00:08:45,873
The Jacuzzi
and the pool's temperature
109
00:08:45,907 --> 00:08:47,608
you can adjust
inside the house.
110
00:08:47,642 --> 00:08:49,576
Daphne pees in the pool,
just to let you know.
111
00:08:49,611 --> 00:08:50,844
Is that going
to be a problem?
112
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:53,047
I do not.
Is there a pool boy?
113
00:08:53,081 --> 00:08:55,115
There is a pool boy.
Is he hot?
114
00:08:55,149 --> 00:08:58,619
He is very good-looking.
Women only.
115
00:08:58,653 --> 00:09:00,988
The beach
is a quarter mile that way.
116
00:09:01,023 --> 00:09:04,626
And the bar's fully stocked
with all the best liquor.
117
00:09:04,660 --> 00:09:06,661
I, myself, don't drink,
but I hear it's really good.
118
00:09:06,695 --> 00:09:08,530
This is
a great porn house.
119
00:09:08,564 --> 00:09:10,766
Oh, you've shot here?
[laughs]
120
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,167
Anyway, that's about it.
121
00:09:12,201 --> 00:09:14,971
So if you need anything else,
call me on this number.
122
00:09:15,005 --> 00:09:16,105
Thank you so much.
123
00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:17,840
I'm going to get
out of your hair now.
124
00:09:17,875 --> 00:09:19,409
Don't do anything
I wouldn't do.
125
00:09:19,444 --> 00:09:22,379
Now, exactly
what might that be?
126
00:09:22,413 --> 00:09:26,482
Oh, my God, I love her.
[giggles]
127
00:09:26,517 --> 00:09:28,084
Congratulations
on your nuptials.
128
00:09:28,118 --> 00:09:30,085
Thank you so much.
Enjoy, ladies.
129
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,621
Cheers to Rachel's marriage
to Cam.
130
00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,056
Whoo!
131
00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:36,157
And good times.
Good times.
132
00:09:36,192 --> 00:09:38,159
Oh.
133
00:09:38,194 --> 00:09:39,827
Rachel!
134
00:09:39,862 --> 00:09:41,796
Kim, Daphne, come here!
135
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:44,833
What the fuck is it with her
and trampolines?
136
00:09:44,868 --> 00:09:46,101
Tramps love tramps, honey.
137
00:09:46,136 --> 00:09:48,004
That's good.
Right?
138
00:09:48,038 --> 00:09:49,005
Yeah, score.
139
00:09:49,039 --> 00:09:50,507
Thanks.
Whoo-hoo!
140
00:09:50,541 --> 00:09:52,809
So, are you nervous?
141
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:54,911
About tomorrow? No.
142
00:09:54,946 --> 00:09:56,580
Are you kidding?
I love that man.
143
00:09:56,615 --> 00:09:59,550
I still don't understand why,
of all the women in the world,
144
00:09:59,584 --> 00:10:01,619
he chose me
to settle down with.
145
00:10:01,653 --> 00:10:04,154
Not that I'm complaining,
mind you.
146
00:10:04,188 --> 00:10:06,089
That was so much fun.
147
00:10:09,126 --> 00:10:14,897
Well, I for one, will never
allow myself to get tied down.
148
00:10:14,931 --> 00:10:17,332
We all know you're the one that loves
to do the tying down, sweetie.
149
00:10:17,366 --> 00:10:20,301
I've seen your collection
of whips and ball gags.
150
00:10:20,336 --> 00:10:22,971
Bunnies and rabbits and
stripper heels and tutus.
151
00:10:23,005 --> 00:10:25,173
Tutus?
152
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,609
It's not like I was
in a rush to get married,
153
00:10:27,643 --> 00:10:31,146
but when I met Cam,
I just knew.
154
00:10:31,180 --> 00:10:32,747
Sorry.
155
00:10:33,750 --> 00:10:35,850
I'll get something for that.
156
00:10:36,752 --> 00:10:38,920
Is she going to be okay?
157
00:10:38,955 --> 00:10:40,956
Yeah, she'll be fine.
158
00:10:40,990 --> 00:10:43,091
It's ancient history.
159
00:10:48,297 --> 00:10:50,098
[pants]
160
00:11:19,495 --> 00:11:22,230
[groans]
[gasps]
161
00:11:24,066 --> 00:11:25,700
Daphne?
Yeah.
162
00:11:25,734 --> 00:11:26,968
Daphne, come on, honey.
Wake up.
163
00:11:27,002 --> 00:11:29,437
Where's my hat?
164
00:11:29,471 --> 00:11:31,439
You must've fallen asleep
out here.
165
00:11:31,474 --> 00:11:33,475
Daphne, come on, honey.
Wake up.
166
00:11:33,509 --> 00:11:35,410
What? Rachel!
167
00:11:35,444 --> 00:11:37,178
Daphne, what happened
last night?
168
00:11:37,213 --> 00:11:39,414
I remember having drinks
by the pool,
169
00:11:39,448 --> 00:11:41,883
and then everything
after that is a complete blank.
170
00:11:41,917 --> 00:11:45,053
We had a pretty good time.
That's what happened.
171
00:11:45,087 --> 00:11:46,188
Do you know
where Sharon and Kim are?
172
00:11:46,222 --> 00:11:48,290
They're not in their rooms? No.
173
00:11:48,324 --> 00:11:52,561
Okay, I need you to get up
and come with me. Okay?
174
00:11:52,596 --> 00:11:54,697
Nuh-uh.
Daphne. Daphne!
175
00:11:54,732 --> 00:11:56,566
Daphne! Up!
Okay, I'm com--
176
00:11:56,600 --> 00:11:57,767
Okay, I'm coming. Wow.
177
00:11:57,801 --> 00:11:59,436
Come on.
We'll get the hat. Whoa!
178
00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:01,083
Come on. Come on.
I have to show you something.
179
00:12:01,108 --> 00:12:02,308
Not good.
180
00:12:04,742 --> 00:12:05,709
Shh.
181
00:12:05,744 --> 00:12:09,480
Oh, Jesus,
what is he doing here?
182
00:12:09,514 --> 00:12:10,648
Who is he?
183
00:12:10,682 --> 00:12:12,116
The stripper.
184
00:12:12,150 --> 00:12:15,153
Don't you remember?
185
00:12:26,799 --> 00:12:28,166
I think he's dead.
Yes.
186
00:12:28,201 --> 00:12:29,601
Uh...
187
00:12:31,170 --> 00:12:32,670
What did you do?
188
00:12:32,705 --> 00:12:34,672
Did you two--
No!
189
00:12:34,706 --> 00:12:35,807
Rachel.
190
00:12:35,841 --> 00:12:37,909
I don't think so.
191
00:12:37,943 --> 00:12:39,477
Gosh. Oh, boy,
this is bad.
192
00:12:39,512 --> 00:12:41,413
Look at the mark on his neck.
Well...
193
00:12:41,447 --> 00:12:43,348
It looks like he was strangled.
Strangled?
194
00:12:43,383 --> 00:12:45,984
Somebody came in here
and killed him?
195
00:12:46,019 --> 00:12:48,720
So you remember him
showing up last night?
196
00:12:48,754 --> 00:12:51,456
Of course I remember him.
197
00:12:51,490 --> 00:12:55,594
He was a surprise, but you were
already pretty wasted by then.
198
00:12:58,898 --> 00:13:00,999
Hey, where you going so fast?
199
00:13:01,034 --> 00:13:04,570
Come on.
What's with the outfit?
200
00:13:04,604 --> 00:13:07,172
I thought you were coming
dressed as a policeman.
201
00:13:07,207 --> 00:13:10,175
Yeah. The girls at the last
party got a little too excited.
202
00:13:10,209 --> 00:13:12,144
And by too excited,
I meant they ripped my uniform
203
00:13:12,178 --> 00:13:13,979
because they couldn't wait
to suck my dick.
204
00:13:14,013 --> 00:13:15,647
But I had to improvise.
205
00:13:15,681 --> 00:13:18,249
I wonder what kind of damage
we're gonna do to this uniform.
206
00:13:18,283 --> 00:13:20,251
We should get started.
I'm hourly.
207
00:13:20,285 --> 00:13:21,819
I like the suspenders.
208
00:13:21,853 --> 00:13:23,421
Yeah? They're stretchy.
209
00:13:23,455 --> 00:13:24,990
[chuckles]
Hey, girls!
210
00:13:25,024 --> 00:13:26,792
[laughing]
211
00:13:26,826 --> 00:13:27,793
[squeals]
212
00:13:27,827 --> 00:13:29,728
You smell
something burning?
213
00:13:29,763 --> 00:13:33,066
The fire's over here, baby!
Whoo!
214
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:35,469
Oh! Oh!
215
00:13:35,503 --> 00:13:37,237
Who's that?
216
00:13:37,272 --> 00:13:40,874
Oh! Who is that?
217
00:13:40,909 --> 00:13:43,143
Who is this?
218
00:13:43,177 --> 00:13:44,878
A spot for you right here.
219
00:13:44,912 --> 00:13:48,181
Shoots on the rocks.
Shoots on the rocks.
220
00:13:48,215 --> 00:13:49,549
I don't have to.
221
00:13:49,584 --> 00:13:51,818
Oh, pretty girls,
take my clothes off.
222
00:13:51,853 --> 00:13:55,054
Loosen up my buttons, baby.
Whoo!
223
00:13:55,088 --> 00:13:56,756
That's what I'm talking about.
224
00:13:56,790 --> 00:13:59,525
There goes the suspenders.
What's under here? I don't know.
225
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,127
It might be a dick!
[squeals]
226
00:14:01,161 --> 00:14:04,130
Oh, it's a dick behind
door one!
227
00:14:04,164 --> 00:14:05,698
Oh, my.
228
00:14:05,733 --> 00:14:07,100
Whoo!
[laughing]
229
00:14:07,134 --> 00:14:09,970
Yeah! Oh, yeah!
Oh, my God!
230
00:14:10,005 --> 00:14:11,572
Uh-oh! Uh-oh!
231
00:14:11,607 --> 00:14:14,676
It's the teabag robot from the future.
[Women whooping]
232
00:14:14,710 --> 00:14:16,378
Uh-oh. I'm from the future
233
00:14:16,412 --> 00:14:18,247
to teabag the bachelorette.
234
00:14:18,281 --> 00:14:21,150
[imitating robot sounds] Oh, my God!
[squealing]
235
00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:27,623
Whoo! Yeah,
it's the teabag robot!
236
00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:29,458
Ah, yeah!
Oh, my God!
237
00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:33,395
Oh! Oh! Bite it!
238
00:14:33,430 --> 00:14:36,998
Ohh! Yeah!
[Women shouting]
239
00:14:37,033 --> 00:14:39,201
The fire is out!
The fire is out! Whoo!
240
00:14:39,235 --> 00:14:41,403
Yeah!
[laughing]
241
00:14:41,437 --> 00:14:44,706
I-- I can't recall
any of it.
242
00:14:44,741 --> 00:14:46,742
What happened
after he finished?
243
00:14:46,777 --> 00:14:48,611
Nothing.
244
00:14:48,645 --> 00:14:50,614
And I thought he left.
245
00:14:50,648 --> 00:14:52,749
After the fight with Sharon...
246
00:14:54,586 --> 00:14:57,621
[chuckling] All right, Rachel.
Come on now, honey.
247
00:14:57,656 --> 00:14:58,990
It's time for bed.
248
00:14:59,024 --> 00:15:00,492
You can do it.
249
00:15:00,526 --> 00:15:02,561
You seen my hat?
It's a rental.
250
00:15:02,595 --> 00:15:07,466
No, but I see a really hot ass
I'd love to lose my face in.
251
00:15:07,500 --> 00:15:09,401
Hey, you ever done it
on a trampoline?
252
00:15:09,435 --> 00:15:11,203
It's really awesome.
253
00:15:11,237 --> 00:15:13,471
No, thanks.
I'm not into cougars.
254
00:15:13,506 --> 00:15:14,973
I'm only 32.
255
00:15:15,007 --> 00:15:17,209
Yeah, but from here,
256
00:15:17,243 --> 00:15:20,478
looks like it's time
to learn the word "Botox."
257
00:15:20,513 --> 00:15:22,146
You're a fucking asshole!
258
00:15:22,181 --> 00:15:24,683
[glass shatters]
259
00:15:24,717 --> 00:15:27,719
[sighs]
One dance.
260
00:15:27,753 --> 00:15:30,455
Oh, you like that, huh?
Come on. Get up here.
261
00:15:30,489 --> 00:15:32,323
Get that hot ass up here.
262
00:15:32,358 --> 00:15:33,658
Whoo!
263
00:15:33,692 --> 00:15:35,593
All right.
You're a saucy one.
264
00:15:35,627 --> 00:15:38,062
[Stripper]
Yeah, mmm.
265
00:15:38,097 --> 00:15:39,964
Let me see that ass.
266
00:15:39,999 --> 00:15:41,566
Let me see that cute ass.
267
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,435
Yeah. Oh, grind on it.
268
00:15:44,470 --> 00:15:46,604
Feel that?
Waking the monster.
269
00:15:46,639 --> 00:15:48,473
I wanna have
your mixed-raced baby.
270
00:15:48,507 --> 00:15:49,974
[laughs]
271
00:15:50,009 --> 00:15:51,475
[screams]
272
00:15:51,510 --> 00:15:54,145
Uh-uh.
Come on now.
273
00:15:54,179 --> 00:15:56,614
You are a fucking dick!
I'd watch out for Sharon.
274
00:15:56,649 --> 00:15:59,718
She caught her last boyfriend
cheating, took a crowbar to his head.
275
00:15:59,752 --> 00:16:02,087
Just now starting to remember his name.
You're a fucking asshole!
276
00:16:02,121 --> 00:16:04,890
If the dude's got no memory of
dating that bitch, he's a lucky man.
277
00:16:04,924 --> 00:16:07,158
Fucking asshole!
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
278
00:16:07,193 --> 00:16:09,561
You don't think Sharon...
279
00:16:09,596 --> 00:16:11,563
We all know
what she's capable of.
280
00:16:11,598 --> 00:16:13,432
Remember what she did
to poor Jason?
281
00:16:13,466 --> 00:16:15,867
Hey, hey, hey.
Back with the coffee and scones.
282
00:16:15,902 --> 00:16:18,704
Hangover cures for all.
283
00:16:20,140 --> 00:16:21,306
[laughs]
284
00:16:22,208 --> 00:16:23,709
Is that who I think it is?
285
00:16:23,743 --> 00:16:25,044
He's dead, Kim.
286
00:16:25,078 --> 00:16:27,080
What?
287
00:16:27,114 --> 00:16:28,615
How?
288
00:16:28,649 --> 00:16:30,517
We don't know.
289
00:16:30,552 --> 00:16:32,553
We, did you
call the police?
290
00:16:32,587 --> 00:16:35,323
No, not yet.
291
00:16:35,357 --> 00:16:38,526
Why? We have to call them
right now!
292
00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:40,928
No! Wait!
Let's just take a beat.
293
00:16:40,962 --> 00:16:42,563
What if they arrest us?
294
00:16:42,597 --> 00:16:44,531
Nobody's going
to get arrested.
295
00:16:44,566 --> 00:16:46,000
I mean, look at him.
296
00:16:46,034 --> 00:16:48,435
He probably pumped himself
full of so many steroids
297
00:16:48,470 --> 00:16:49,903
his heart finally gave out.
298
00:16:49,938 --> 00:16:51,905
I don't think
this is drug related.
299
00:16:51,940 --> 00:16:56,976
Whoever killed him
could've used this.
300
00:16:57,010 --> 00:16:59,545
Jesus Christ!
301
00:16:59,579 --> 00:17:01,113
I mean,
how did he get here?
302
00:17:01,147 --> 00:17:02,348
I don't know.
303
00:17:02,382 --> 00:17:05,651
She can't remember if she
had sex with him or not.
304
00:17:05,685 --> 00:17:08,287
You had sex
with this slime-bot?
305
00:17:08,322 --> 00:17:10,723
No, no, I--
306
00:17:10,758 --> 00:17:13,327
Would you stop saying that?
Well...
307
00:17:13,361 --> 00:17:15,696
I can't believe this.
We really have to call the police.
308
00:17:15,730 --> 00:17:17,665
Please, just wait!
309
00:17:17,699 --> 00:17:19,600
Just give me a second
to think.
310
00:17:19,635 --> 00:17:21,970
God, it's my wedding day!
What if Cam finds out?
311
00:17:22,004 --> 00:17:24,047
It's not a question of
if he finds out, darling.
312
00:17:24,048 --> 00:17:24,968
He's going to find out.
313
00:17:24,973 --> 00:17:27,874
[moaning]
Whose phone is this?
314
00:17:27,909 --> 00:17:30,277
[sighs] Mine.
I've been looking for it everywhere.
315
00:17:30,312 --> 00:17:32,245
[moaning continues]
What?
316
00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:34,114
[Stripper] Yeah, who would'vethought the little bride
317
00:17:34,148 --> 00:17:35,815
would turn out to besuch a little slut, huh?
318
00:17:35,849 --> 00:17:38,050
Oh, God, no!
319
00:17:38,085 --> 00:17:41,921
Yep, you fucked him.
320
00:17:43,290 --> 00:17:45,325
What the fuck?
321
00:18:07,283 --> 00:18:09,551
Where the hell
is the coffeemaker?
322
00:18:09,585 --> 00:18:13,588
I feel like they're doing
that show Stomp inside my head.
323
00:18:13,622 --> 00:18:17,124
Hey, Sharon,
did you do it?
324
00:18:17,158 --> 00:18:18,492
Do what?
325
00:18:21,929 --> 00:18:23,663
The stripper.
326
00:18:25,266 --> 00:18:28,135
No, I didn't do him,
327
00:18:28,170 --> 00:18:29,737
not for lack of trying.
328
00:18:29,772 --> 00:18:31,906
Hey, hey, hey.
329
00:18:31,940 --> 00:18:35,009
Did you kill him?
330
00:18:36,178 --> 00:18:38,213
Yeah. He's here.
331
00:18:38,248 --> 00:18:39,682
He's pretty stiff,
332
00:18:39,716 --> 00:18:41,951
and I'm not talking
about his cock either.
333
00:18:41,985 --> 00:18:43,419
What?
334
00:18:46,189 --> 00:18:47,990
You think I did this?
335
00:18:48,025 --> 00:18:51,059
Given your history, is it any
surprise our minds went there?
336
00:18:51,094 --> 00:18:53,528
Daphne heard you threaten
to kill him last night.
337
00:18:53,562 --> 00:18:55,430
I wasn't serious.
Okay.
338
00:18:55,464 --> 00:18:59,033
Jesus, guys, how could you think
that I would do something like this?
339
00:18:59,067 --> 00:19:01,869
Somebody strangled him
and put him in Rachel's bed.
340
00:19:01,903 --> 00:19:04,271
And you are the only one
that had a problem with him.
341
00:19:04,305 --> 00:19:08,075
So you found him here? In Rachel's bed?
[Man laughing]
342
00:19:08,110 --> 00:19:10,311
[Man, Woman moaning]
343
00:19:10,345 --> 00:19:13,047
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
344
00:19:13,081 --> 00:19:14,648
Yeah!
345
00:19:14,682 --> 00:19:18,351
And obviously Rachel was the last one
to see him alive. [beeps off]
346
00:19:18,386 --> 00:19:20,821
I don't remember
having sex with him.
347
00:19:20,855 --> 00:19:23,858
And maybe I don't remember
killing him either. No.
348
00:19:23,892 --> 00:19:26,193
That's ridiculous.
You couldn't hurt anyone.
349
00:19:26,228 --> 00:19:28,830
But I could?
350
00:19:28,864 --> 00:19:32,100
My own BFFs.
Thanks for the support.
351
00:19:32,135 --> 00:19:34,904
What about Daphne?
352
00:19:34,939 --> 00:19:36,373
Me?
353
00:19:36,407 --> 00:19:38,108
We all know that you're
still in love with Cam
354
00:19:38,142 --> 00:19:40,444
ever since you two
hooked up at Burning Man.
355
00:19:40,478 --> 00:19:42,813
I bet you would just love
to spoil Rachel's big day.
356
00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:46,517
By killing some innocent guy?
Get real.
357
00:19:46,551 --> 00:19:48,419
Daphne and I worked
that out ages ago,
358
00:19:48,453 --> 00:19:50,888
which is why she's
one of my bridesmaids.
359
00:19:50,923 --> 00:19:52,457
The past is the past.
360
00:19:52,491 --> 00:19:54,892
Okay. We really
should call the cops.
361
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:58,062
The longer that we wait, the worse
that this is gonna look for us.
362
00:19:58,096 --> 00:20:01,164
I mean, they can determine
the time of death,
363
00:20:01,199 --> 00:20:04,934
and they're gonna wonder,
why did we wait so long?
364
00:20:04,969 --> 00:20:06,936
I think we should
get rid of the body.
365
00:20:06,971 --> 00:20:08,304
Of course you do.
366
00:20:08,338 --> 00:20:10,373
We could put it
behind some bushes
367
00:20:10,407 --> 00:20:14,243
at a deserted park
or in a Dumpster in an alley.
368
00:20:14,277 --> 00:20:17,279
We'll just say that he came,
he did his thing and he left.
369
00:20:17,313 --> 00:20:20,115
He could've been killed on his way
home by a mugger or something.
370
00:20:20,149 --> 00:20:22,650
No. We'll get caught.
371
00:20:22,685 --> 00:20:25,286
Do you not watch CSI?
372
00:20:25,321 --> 00:20:28,056
Which one?
373
00:20:28,090 --> 00:20:31,426
Look, people that do stupid
things-- they always get caught.
374
00:20:31,460 --> 00:20:34,963
So, first, I was a killer,
and now I'm stupid?
375
00:20:34,997 --> 00:20:38,333
It's my wedding day.
I don't wanna go to jail.
376
00:20:38,367 --> 00:20:40,235
Maybe we should consider it.
377
00:20:40,269 --> 00:20:42,104
You are all
not thinking clearly.
378
00:20:42,139 --> 00:20:43,906
[doorbell rings]
379
00:20:43,940 --> 00:20:44,940
[Woman]
Hello!
380
00:20:44,975 --> 00:20:46,308
The owner.
381
00:20:46,343 --> 00:20:47,477
Is anyone home?
382
00:20:47,511 --> 00:20:48,845
She's coming in.
383
00:20:48,879 --> 00:20:50,213
Stall her.
We'll hide the body.
384
00:20:50,248 --> 00:20:51,748
Ladies, are you in there?
385
00:20:51,782 --> 00:20:53,918
Grab him in front.
Don't touch him here.
386
00:20:53,952 --> 00:20:56,087
Is everything all right
in there?
387
00:20:57,723 --> 00:21:01,126
Oh, yeah. We were just
helping Rachel get ready.
388
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:03,996
You know how hard it is to squeeze
a porker into her wedding dress.
389
00:21:04,030 --> 00:21:07,465
She's a stress eater. She put on a few
pounds in the last couple of days.
390
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:10,636
But anyways, we couldn't get
the garbage disposal to work,
391
00:21:10,670 --> 00:21:11,803
but we fixed it.
392
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:14,139
No. No, no, no.
What? What? Come on! What?
393
00:21:14,173 --> 00:21:16,107
I'm sorry. He has a boner or something.
Come on!
394
00:21:16,142 --> 00:21:18,343
So everything is fine.
I'm sorry that you came over here
395
00:21:18,377 --> 00:21:20,178
all the way for nothing.
Is Rachel inside?
396
00:21:20,212 --> 00:21:22,213
A boner? What--
Oh, oh, oh.
397
00:21:22,247 --> 00:21:24,949
Are you okay?
[grunting]
398
00:21:24,983 --> 00:21:27,985
Let's cover things up.
Okay. My veil.
399
00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:29,520
Yes, but, I...
400
00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:35,160
[laughs] I hope he doesn't
see something he shouldn't.
401
00:21:43,335 --> 00:21:46,837
Cam! What are you
doing here?
402
00:21:46,871 --> 00:21:48,305
You sounded worried earlier.
403
00:21:48,339 --> 00:21:50,808
I wanted to make sure you weren't
having pre-wedding jitters.
404
00:21:50,842 --> 00:21:54,344
It took me six shots of espresso
to sober up before I--
405
00:21:54,379 --> 00:21:56,413
[gags]
I'm gonna throw up.
406
00:21:56,448 --> 00:21:57,547
No!
407
00:21:57,582 --> 00:21:59,516
[gagging]
408
00:22:01,219 --> 00:22:03,687
[coughs]
409
00:22:05,556 --> 00:22:07,791
What the fuck is that?
410
00:22:07,825 --> 00:22:09,560
I know.
411
00:22:10,529 --> 00:22:12,163
I know.
412
00:22:17,603 --> 00:22:19,905
We have to
postpone the wedding.
413
00:22:23,643 --> 00:22:24,944
No.
414
00:22:24,978 --> 00:22:27,513
Cam, we have no choice.
415
00:22:27,547 --> 00:22:29,948
We're doing it.
Just as we planned.
416
00:22:29,982 --> 00:22:31,983
Today.
417
00:22:32,018 --> 00:22:33,151
Why?
418
00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:36,054
Because I have to be married
by the time I'm 30.
419
00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:37,721
Sweetie, no, you don't.
420
00:22:39,857 --> 00:22:41,725
When my grandmother died,
421
00:22:41,759 --> 00:22:43,627
she left me
a ten-million-dollar trust fund.
422
00:22:43,661 --> 00:22:46,196
But there was a catch.
423
00:22:46,231 --> 00:22:48,799
She stipulated that I have to
be married by my 30th birthday
424
00:22:48,834 --> 00:22:50,935
or I don't get the money.
425
00:22:50,969 --> 00:22:53,204
Why would she
do something like that?
426
00:22:53,239 --> 00:22:56,375
Gram was around long enough
to see me go through my...
427
00:22:56,409 --> 00:22:58,210
wild period.
428
00:22:58,244 --> 00:23:01,079
Let's just say
she didn't exactly approve.
429
00:23:01,114 --> 00:23:04,283
She wanted me to settle down
and make something of myself,
430
00:23:04,317 --> 00:23:05,784
which I did.
431
00:23:05,819 --> 00:23:08,253
Just after she was gone.
432
00:23:08,287 --> 00:23:11,623
But there's still that clause in
the will that I need to adhere to.
433
00:23:11,657 --> 00:23:14,960
Why didn't you tell me?
I was going to. I just--
434
00:23:14,994 --> 00:23:16,611
I didn't want you to
think that I was marrying
435
00:23:16,636 --> 00:23:18,336
you just so I can get
my hands on the money.
436
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:20,665
[mutters]
437
00:23:20,699 --> 00:23:24,702
I'm marrying you
because I love you, Rachel.
438
00:23:26,438 --> 00:23:28,672
Okay, that's really sweet,
but what I wanna know is,
439
00:23:28,707 --> 00:23:31,575
what happens to the money
if you don't get married?
440
00:23:37,081 --> 00:23:38,315
Kim.
441
00:23:42,487 --> 00:23:44,721
Oh, my God.
It was you.
442
00:23:44,755 --> 00:23:47,557
You hired the stripper.
443
00:23:47,591 --> 00:23:50,159
And you made my first drink.
444
00:23:50,193 --> 00:23:54,196
You spiked it,
which is why I was so out of it
445
00:23:54,230 --> 00:23:56,164
and can't remember anything.
446
00:23:56,198 --> 00:23:58,800
And someone would have
had to record it.
447
00:24:00,035 --> 00:24:02,937
You actually made moans
448
00:24:02,972 --> 00:24:05,441
to make it look
like it was actually happening,
449
00:24:05,475 --> 00:24:08,310
like I was awake
and I was enjoying it?
450
00:24:08,345 --> 00:24:12,181
And you were going
to e-mail that it to Cam
451
00:24:12,215 --> 00:24:14,651
so he'd call off the wedding.
452
00:24:14,685 --> 00:24:18,822
And you would be next in line
for the trust fund.
453
00:24:20,525 --> 00:24:22,193
[Cam]
Kim,
454
00:24:23,862 --> 00:24:26,030
did you really murder
this poor guy?
455
00:24:26,064 --> 00:24:28,232
"Poor guy"? "Poor guy"?
456
00:24:28,267 --> 00:24:31,269
Oh, come on, Cam.
Get off your high fucking horse.
457
00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:34,005
"Poor guy." He was just
some sleazy stripper.
458
00:24:35,975 --> 00:24:38,476
Anyways,
it was his own fault.
459
00:24:38,511 --> 00:24:41,213
No one was supposed
to get hurt.
460
00:24:41,247 --> 00:24:43,849
But the bastard got greedy.
461
00:24:43,883 --> 00:24:46,051
That was shit.
This is grade-A cock right here.
462
00:24:46,085 --> 00:24:48,119
I'm a fucking pro, baby.
463
00:24:48,154 --> 00:24:51,390
He demanded
half of the money,
464
00:24:51,424 --> 00:24:55,326
threatened to expose me
to you and Rachel.
465
00:24:55,360 --> 00:24:57,295
Five million dollars,
and then that was it.
466
00:24:57,329 --> 00:24:59,897
I think I deserve a tip on top of that.
I don't think you do.
467
00:24:59,931 --> 00:25:02,132
Sometimes it's nice to tip.
We're talking five million dollars here.
468
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:04,268
I'm talking one million dollars
more on top of that.
469
00:25:04,302 --> 00:25:07,738
So I just agreed
to shut him up.
470
00:25:07,772 --> 00:25:09,106
But come on.
471
00:25:09,140 --> 00:25:11,574
I wasn't just gonna hand over
five million dollars
472
00:25:11,609 --> 00:25:14,143
to some lame-ass
cock-jock fireman.
473
00:25:14,178 --> 00:25:17,647
So I made him the same special
cocktail that I made Rachel,
474
00:25:19,249 --> 00:25:23,953
and I kept him busy
until it took effect.
475
00:25:23,988 --> 00:25:26,924
[mutters, grunts]
476
00:25:28,159 --> 00:25:30,327
Fuck, yeah!
477
00:25:31,863 --> 00:25:34,031
[moaning]
478
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:36,967
Oh, yeah!
479
00:25:37,002 --> 00:25:39,837
[grunting]
Oh, yeah!
480
00:25:41,139 --> 00:25:43,774
Oh, yeah!
[slaps]
481
00:25:46,044 --> 00:25:47,512
[moaning]
482
00:25:48,414 --> 00:25:50,748
Oh, yeah!
483
00:25:53,351 --> 00:25:55,152
And I could handle
484
00:25:55,186 --> 00:25:57,187
this problem
once and for all.
485
00:25:58,989 --> 00:26:01,624
But it turned out to be
486
00:26:01,659 --> 00:26:04,728
a much better plan
than I anticipated.
487
00:26:04,762 --> 00:26:07,297
Because cheating
is one thing,
488
00:26:07,331 --> 00:26:09,566
but accidentally
killing a trick
489
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:12,669
during a sex game gone wrong
the night before your wedding--
490
00:26:12,703 --> 00:26:15,906
Well, there's just no way
491
00:26:15,940 --> 00:26:19,443
that Cam was
ever gonna say "I do."
492
00:26:19,477 --> 00:26:20,744
Not to her.
493
00:26:20,778 --> 00:26:23,080
No wonder you wanted
to call the cops.
494
00:26:23,114 --> 00:26:26,116
You knew it looked bad for me.
495
00:26:26,150 --> 00:26:28,719
I did what I had to do.
496
00:26:28,753 --> 00:26:33,256
I mean, we're talking
ten million dollars here.
497
00:26:34,159 --> 00:26:36,327
It's not fair.
498
00:26:36,361 --> 00:26:38,596
Okay, I was the good girl.
499
00:26:38,630 --> 00:26:41,198
I went to Nana's house
every Sunday.
500
00:26:41,233 --> 00:26:44,768
I remembered her birthdays.
He didn't.
501
00:26:44,802 --> 00:26:46,870
I was the one
that got straight A's.
502
00:26:46,904 --> 00:26:48,338
I was the good girl.
503
00:26:48,372 --> 00:26:52,208
But the bitch
left it all to him.
504
00:26:52,242 --> 00:26:55,010
Thought he could change.
505
00:26:56,445 --> 00:26:59,314
But it wasn't the money
that changed him, Rachel.
506
00:26:59,348 --> 00:27:01,282
It was you.
507
00:27:02,852 --> 00:27:05,320
Your little Frederick's
of Hollywood number--
508
00:27:05,354 --> 00:27:06,822
was it preshrunk?
509
00:27:06,856 --> 00:27:08,456
No.
510
00:27:15,599 --> 00:27:19,102
Worst maid of honor ever.
511
00:27:21,038 --> 00:27:22,639
[police radio chatter]
512
00:27:27,277 --> 00:27:30,212
So I guess I won't
be giving you my toast.
513
00:27:30,247 --> 00:27:33,849
Kim, this is serious.
You killed someone.
514
00:27:33,883 --> 00:27:36,051
I know.
515
00:27:36,085 --> 00:27:39,387
But I also know
what kind of man you are, Cam,
516
00:27:39,421 --> 00:27:41,689
and you'll spend most
of that ten million dollars
517
00:27:41,724 --> 00:27:45,660
on the best doctors
and lawyers to get me off.
518
00:27:47,397 --> 00:27:50,299
I'll see you again.
519
00:27:50,333 --> 00:27:52,001
Soon.
520
00:27:53,804 --> 00:27:57,273
Oh, and will you
save me some cake?
521
00:27:57,307 --> 00:28:01,144
You know how I love me
some cake.
522
00:28:01,178 --> 00:28:03,079
I'll come visit you.
523
00:28:03,113 --> 00:28:05,014
I'll get you the cake.
524
00:28:05,048 --> 00:28:07,149
No. No.
525
00:28:13,322 --> 00:28:15,456
[police radio chatter]
526
00:28:29,704 --> 00:28:32,039
It's been said it's bad luck
for a bride and groom
527
00:28:32,073 --> 00:28:34,141
to see each other
before the wedding.
528
00:28:34,175 --> 00:28:36,243
Although,
after the day they've had,
529
00:28:36,277 --> 00:28:38,144
I don't blame Rachel or Cam
530
00:28:38,179 --> 00:28:40,513
for throwing caution
to the wind.
531
00:28:40,547 --> 00:28:42,214
As for lessons learned,
532
00:28:42,249 --> 00:28:44,283
it's an age-old question
for women:
533
00:28:44,317 --> 00:28:48,220
Do you marry
for love or for money?
534
00:28:48,254 --> 00:28:50,556
[chuckles]
535
00:28:50,590 --> 00:28:52,624
Luckily, though,
for Rachel Worth,
536
00:28:52,658 --> 00:28:54,993
today she doesn't
have to choose.
537
00:28:55,027 --> 00:28:57,662
Mahalo.
538
00:28:57,696 --> 00:29:01,332
♪ You sayyou want to marry me ♪
539
00:29:01,367 --> 00:29:02,733
♪ It's dark in here ♪
540
00:29:02,768 --> 00:29:05,202
♪ I cannot find the light ♪
541
00:29:05,237 --> 00:29:08,506
♪ You say,why don't we go outside? ♪
542
00:29:08,541 --> 00:29:10,275
♪ We can wander around ♪
543
00:29:10,309 --> 00:29:13,012
♪ We can stay up all night ♪
544
00:29:13,046 --> 00:29:15,948
♪ I knowI have to come around ♪
545
00:29:15,982 --> 00:29:17,884
♪ If I want to find it ♪
546
00:29:17,918 --> 00:29:20,754
♪ If I wantto make it real ♪
547
00:29:23,191 --> 00:29:26,126
♪ Oh, I might like that ♪
548
00:29:26,160 --> 00:29:29,463
♪ Everything has lostits impact ♪
549
00:29:30,698 --> 00:29:33,601
♪ Oh, I might like that ♪
550
00:29:33,635 --> 00:29:37,005
♪ Everything has lostits impact ♪
551
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:41,476
♪ Oh, I might like that ♪
552
00:29:41,510 --> 00:29:43,478
♪ Everything is lost ♪
553
00:29:43,512 --> 00:29:46,380
♪ It gets away from me ♪
554
00:29:46,415 --> 00:29:50,415
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
555
00:29:50,452 --> 00:29:51,652
[electricity arcing]
556
00:29:51,686 --> 00:29:54,121
[Man]Kill, Ubu, kill.
557
00:29:54,156 --> 00:29:56,491
Good fish.
558
00:29:56,541 --> 00:30:01,091
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