Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,290 --> 00:00:02,480
being around Tasha,
2
00:00:02,490 --> 00:00:04,100
we had become really good friends.
3
00:00:04,110 --> 00:00:05,870
"Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go"?
4
00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:06,950
What does that even mean?
5
00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:09,340
The problem was: I didn't want to be just a friend.
6
00:00:09,350 --> 00:00:12,350
I wanted to get out of the friend zone and into the lover zone,
7
00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:14,660
and the only way was to swing for the fences.
8
00:00:14,670 --> 00:00:15,980
Can I ask you a question?
9
00:00:15,990 --> 00:00:17,080
Yeah.
10
00:00:17,090 --> 00:00:18,590
Will you go withe?
11
00:00:19,630 --> 00:00:20,900
Go where?
12
00:00:21,300 --> 00:00:22,590
Strike one.
13
00:00:22,910 --> 00:00:25,410
No,I mean,like,go together.
14
00:00:25,820 --> 00:00:27,210
We are together.
15
00:00:27,610 --> 00:00:28,970
Strike two!
16
00:00:30,140 --> 00:00:33,220
No,I mean,like,you and me go out.
17
00:00:33,230 --> 00:00:34,340
What?
18
00:00:34,350 --> 00:00:36,340
Strike three and you're out!
19
00:00:36,350 --> 00:00:37,930
Boy,you so crazy.
20
00:00:38,380 --> 00:00:39,890
Yeah,I'm so crazy.
21
00:00:40,230 --> 00:00:41,470
Are you about to go home?
22
00:00:41,480 --> 00:00:42,940
Yeah,to cry.
23
00:00:42,950 --> 00:00:44,620
Yeah,I guess.
24
00:00:45,030 --> 00:00:46,800
Since the direct approach didn't work,
25
00:00:46,810 --> 00:00:48,430
I wondered what would.
26
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:50,260
I thought about being romantic.
27
00:00:50,270 --> 00:00:51,810
Chris,what are you doing?
28
00:00:51,820 --> 00:00:53,210
These are for you.
29
00:00:54,190 --> 00:00:56,060
Boy,you're so crazy.
30
00:00:56,370 --> 00:00:57,790
I thought about being chivalrous.
31
00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:58,930
Allow me.
32
00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:03,490
Boy,you so crazy.
33
00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:06,240
Boy,is that your good jacket?
34
00:01:06,470 --> 00:01:07,840
No.
35
00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:10,670
I even thought about being brave.
36
00:01:11,980 --> 00:01:13,770
why don't y'all leave her alone?
37
00:01:16,050 --> 00:01:17,750
Oh,God!
38
00:01:20,850 --> 00:01:22,920
Boy,you so crazy!
39
00:01:23,240 --> 00:01:26,310
No matter what I did,she always said the same thing.
40
00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,830
I'm glad we're friends.
41
00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:29,040
That makes one of us.
42
00:01:29,050 --> 00:01:31,330
I think you're,like,one of the funniest people I know.
43
00:01:31,860 --> 00:01:33,130
Thanks.
44
00:01:34,180 --> 00:01:36,340
Friends don't let friends die lonely.
45
00:02:08,870 --> 00:02:12,820
sha blues,my father came bearing news.
46
00:02:12,980 --> 00:02:14,070
Hey,everybody.
47
00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:15,310
Hi,baby.
48
00:02:15,990 --> 00:02:17,260
I've got good news.
49
00:02:17,270 --> 00:02:19,480
- You finally kicked the gout?
- No.
50
00:02:19,490 --> 00:02:21,880
- Chris isn't your real son?
- No.
51
00:02:21,890 --> 00:02:24,620
- Lionel Richie is back with The Commodores?
- No.
52
00:02:24,630 --> 00:02:27,270
- Did you trade Tonya to the devil for cable?
- No.
53
00:02:27,780 --> 00:02:30,160
I am Employee of the Month.
54
00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:32,550
That's nice,baby.
55
00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:33,730
That's great.
56
00:02:33,740 --> 00:02:35,320
Aren't you going to ask me what I got?
57
00:02:35,330 --> 00:02:36,280
A raise?
58
00:02:36,290 --> 00:02:37,110
No.
59
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:38,130
Well,what did you get?
60
00:02:38,140 --> 00:02:40,000
Your regular pay and a kick in the ass.
61
00:02:40,010 --> 00:02:44,060
A coupon for a free dinner for six at Domaine et Mer.Domain.
62
00:02:44,770 --> 00:02:46,130
Mayor?
63
00:02:46,140 --> 00:02:47,730
The man is where?
64
00:02:47,740 --> 00:02:48,830
Is that Russian?
65
00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:49,890
No,that's Spanish.
66
00:02:49,900 --> 00:02:51,500
No,baby,it's French.
67
00:02:51,510 --> 00:02:53,850
Ah,dinner for six,that sounds nice.
68
00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:56,060
But there's only five of us.
69
00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:56,920
Yeah.
70
00:02:56,930 --> 00:02:58,190
Maybe we can bring somebody.
71
00:02:58,580 --> 00:02:59,750
Wait a minute now.
72
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:01,000
This sounds like a nice place.
73
00:03:01,010 --> 00:03:02,460
We can't just bring anybody.
74
00:03:02,470 --> 00:03:04,110
We thought about bringing Vanessa.
75
00:03:04,630 --> 00:03:06,050
I dated a French guy once.
76
00:03:06,060 --> 00:03:07,910
I can't stand French food.
77
00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:09,020
I mean,hors d'oeuvres.
78
00:03:09,030 --> 00:03:11,220
Who wants a piece of liver on a toothpick?
79
00:03:11,610 --> 00:03:13,000
You got any chimichangas?
80
00:03:13,010 --> 00:03:14,650
We thought about Jerome.
81
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:16,830
excuse me,garçon.
82
00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:18,410
Can we get some more silverware?
83
00:03:18,420 --> 00:03:19,880
I just put some out.
84
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,530
I don't know what happened to it.
85
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,080
We even thought about Mr.Omar.
86
00:03:28,170 --> 00:03:29,300
Oh,my God!
87
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:30,160
He's choking!
88
00:03:30,170 --> 00:03:30,990
Help him!
89
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,090
Hold on!
90
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:33,850
There's nothing we can do.
91
00:03:33,860 --> 00:03:35,580
But he's still choking.
92
00:03:36,860 --> 00:03:38,070
Not anymore.
93
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,190
Tragic.
94
00:03:41,860 --> 00:03:42,890
You know what?
95
00:03:43,220 --> 00:03:44,900
We need to bring somebody classy.
96
00:03:44,910 --> 00:03:46,340
Let me think about it.
97
00:03:46,910 --> 00:03:49,150
I was still hoping to make some progress with Tasha,
98
00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:51,740
but Greg was convinced all hope was lost.
99
00:03:51,750 --> 00:03:53,050
Dude,once a friend,always a friend.
100
00:03:53,060 --> 00:03:54,410
It's the Westermarck effect.
101
00:03:54,420 --> 00:03:55,320
West what?
102
00:03:55,330 --> 00:03:56,550
Edward Westermarck.
103
00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:57,570
He was a scientist.
104
00:03:57,580 --> 00:04:01,730
He concluded that when two people live together in close proximity during the early years of life,
105
00:04:02,070 --> 00:04:03,720
they will never become boyfriend and girlfriend.
106
00:04:03,730 --> 00:04:05,730
That means I still have a chance with Shakira.
107
00:04:05,740 --> 00:04:08,010
There's got to be some way for her to see me as more than just a friend.
108
00:04:08,610 --> 00:04:10,020
What kind of boys does she like?
109
00:04:10,030 --> 00:04:11,120
I don't know.
110
00:04:11,730 --> 00:04:13,960
Well,maybe you should ask some other girls.
111
00:04:13,970 --> 00:04:15,180
You'll get some ideas.
112
00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:17,200
When you ask girls what they like,
113
00:04:17,210 --> 00:04:20,710
I found out you learn two things: everything and nothing.
114
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:22,310
So what type of guys do you like?
115
00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:23,680
I like dumb guys.
116
00:04:23,690 --> 00:04:25,110
I like tall guys.
117
00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:26,560
I like girls.
118
00:04:26,570 --> 00:04:29,100
Not interesting now,but it will be later.
119
00:04:29,460 --> 00:04:30,490
Free spirits.
120
00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:31,280
Nice guys.
121
00:04:31,290 --> 00:04:32,190
Bad boys.
122
00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:34,280
Rich.
123
00:04:35,130 --> 00:04:35,940
Thanks.
124
00:04:35,950 --> 00:04:37,130
I thought that was bad.
125
00:04:37,140 --> 00:04:40,490
Then I found out I wasn't the only guy that didn't know anything about women.
126
00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:42,680
Girls like it when you give them compliments.
127
00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:47,270
Hey,baby,I'm no Fred Flintstone,but I can make your Bedrock.
128
00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:48,750
Shut up,idiot.
129
00:04:49,870 --> 00:04:51,570
I wasn't even talking to her.
130
00:04:52,100 --> 00:04:53,350
Hey,baby,what you doing?
131
00:04:56,020 --> 00:04:58,520
Julius,I'm gonna need a few extra dollars this week.
132
00:04:58,910 --> 00:04:59,850
For what?
133
00:04:59,860 --> 00:05:03,670
Well,we can't go to a nice restaurant looking like "Who let you in?"
134
00:05:04,210 --> 00:05:05,680
I'm gonna need a new dress.
135
00:05:06,010 --> 00:05:07,890
The boys need haircuts.
136
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,120
And I need a new pair of shoes.
137
00:05:10,130 --> 00:05:11,320
So does Tonya.
138
00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:13,680
I saw these fake eyelashes.
139
00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,520
There's this really nice shawl that goes with the dress.
140
00:05:16,530 --> 00:05:17,460
Pantyhose.
141
00:05:17,470 --> 00:05:20,300
Only my mother could make a free dinner expensive.
142
00:05:21,180 --> 00:05:23,210
After getting every answer under the sun,
143
00:05:23,220 --> 00:05:27,110
I figured the only way to find out what Tasha liked was to ask Tasha.
144
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:28,290
Tag.
145
00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:29,750
You need to borrow some detergent?
146
00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:30,870
No,it's okay.
147
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:31,930
My grandma's ticky.
148
00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:34,960
If I get the wrong soap,she says it's going to make her butt itch.
149
00:05:35,220 --> 00:05:36,280
Do you have any quarters?
150
00:05:36,290 --> 00:05:37,530
Yeah.
151
00:05:38,900 --> 00:05:40,880
You know,I didn't expect to see you here today.
152
00:05:40,890 --> 00:05:42,540
I always do laundry on Wednesdays.
153
00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:43,710
I told you that.
154
00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:45,370
Oh,yeah,I must have forgot.
155
00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:47,530
Don't you just hate doing laundry?
156
00:05:47,540 --> 00:05:48,560
Yeah.
157
00:05:49,220 --> 00:05:54,180
But,you know,I guess it'd be kind of cool if you had a boyfriend to do it for you.
158
00:05:54,470 --> 00:05:55,420
No.
159
00:05:55,430 --> 00:05:57,220
What kind of man does a woman's laundry?
160
00:05:57,890 --> 00:05:59,050
Strike one!
161
00:05:59,450 --> 00:06:01,310
Yeah,no,that wouldn't be cool.
162
00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:02,620
I- I wouldn't do that.
163
00:06:02,910 --> 00:06:04,680
I'd be like,"Woman,you better do my laundry.
164
00:06:04,690 --> 00:06:07,710
" And I guess you want her barefoot and pregnant,too,huh?
165
00:06:08,170 --> 00:06:09,550
Strike two!
166
00:06:10,350 --> 00:06:11,540
Nah.
167
00:06:11,550 --> 00:06:13,030
I was just kidding.
168
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,940
All right,don't mess this one up.
169
00:06:14,950 --> 00:06:19,230
So if you could go out with any type of guy,who would you pick?
170
00:06:19,550 --> 00:06:21,580
I know this is going to sound funny,but.
171
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,500
I'd go with Slaver Slav.
172
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:25,960
Who?
173
00:06:25,970 --> 00:06:28,140
Slaver Slav is the preeminent bad boy of rap,
174
00:06:28,150 --> 00:06:30,420
the top recording act at Setback Records.
175
00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:34,340
He is responsible for the hit album I'm Smacking and Stabbing Somebody.
176
00:06:34,630 --> 00:06:35,960
At the tender age of 16,
177
00:06:35,970 --> 00:06:39,580
Slaver Slav was released from prison after serving 17 years for aggravated battery.
178
00:06:39,940 --> 00:06:42,050
This is Slaver Slav's first mug shot,
179
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:43,910
but it wasn't his last.
180
00:06:44,190 --> 00:06:46,540
He released his first single "Put Me in Jail Again
181
00:06:46,550 --> 00:06:49,110
and I'll Smack the Stank Off You" about a month later.
182
00:06:49,430 --> 00:06:51,040
The rest is history.
183
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:53,610
Slaver Slav?
184
00:06:53,620 --> 00:06:54,600
Why?
185
00:06:54,610 --> 00:06:55,700
He's a bad boy.
186
00:06:55,710 --> 00:06:57,880
I mean,you never know what he's going to do next.
187
00:06:57,890 --> 00:06:59,750
Yeah,stab you or shoot you.
188
00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:01,200
All the girls like him.
189
00:07:01,210 --> 00:07:04,350
Now if I could just get locked up,I could finally get lucky.
190
00:07:05,070 --> 00:07:07,100
Wait,that didn't come out right.
191
00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:13,650
Hey,man,I've been looking for you.
192
00:07:13,660 --> 00:07:14,420
What's up?
193
00:07:14,430 --> 00:07:16,740
I've got every tape and article on Slaver Slav.
194
00:07:16,750 --> 00:07:17,920
My wigga!
195
00:07:17,930 --> 00:07:21,380
All you have to do is study him,learn him,be him.
196
00:07:21,390 --> 00:07:22,430
Thanks.
197
00:07:22,440 --> 00:07:23,480
No problem.
198
00:07:24,470 --> 00:07:25,630
Watching Slaver Slav,
199
00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:28,080
I learned the most important thing about being a bad boy.
200
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:30,800
When it comes to girls,the meaner the better,
201
00:07:30,810 --> 00:07:33,570
and whatever you do,don't be nice.
202
00:08:03,980 --> 00:08:07,580
That girl on the left eventually had a baby with Ghostface Killah.
203
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:15,980
Chris,I hear your father got Employee of the Month down at the paper.
204
00:08:15,990 --> 00:08:17,190
Yeah.
205
00:08:20,770 --> 00:08:23,300
They still giving out their free dinners?
206
00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:25,940
Subtlety was not Doc's strong suit.
207
00:08:25,950 --> 00:08:29,430
Uh,that's usually for six people,right?
208
00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:31,500
Uh-huh,I'm thinking about asking Tasha to go.
209
00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:33,400
Oh,Tasha.
210
00:08:33,410 --> 00:08:35,200
'Cause she looks better in a dress.
211
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:37,990
Slaver Slav.
212
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,780
The bad boy of rap.
213
00:08:40,230 --> 00:08:41,420
You know him?
214
00:08:41,430 --> 00:08:44,660
Yeah,he broke up with my best buddy's niece.
215
00:08:45,620 --> 00:08:47,350
That boy is bad.
216
00:08:47,670 --> 00:08:50,460
He treated her like nothing,and she still loved him.
217
00:08:50,470 --> 00:08:51,600
See,that's what I don't get.
218
00:08:51,610 --> 00:08:53,860
I don't understand why girls like you to treat them bad.
219
00:08:53,870 --> 00:08:56,020
Chris,women are crazy.
220
00:08:56,030 --> 00:08:58,060
They think just because they get a bad boy,
221
00:08:58,070 --> 00:09:03,290
they'll be so special that they'll be the only ones to make him treat a girl nice.
222
00:09:03,580 --> 00:09:06,170
It's just like trying to climb Mount Everest.
223
00:09:06,180 --> 00:09:08,650
Every now and then,somebody does it,
224
00:09:08,950 --> 00:09:12,570
but they usually end up in a snow cave,chewing on their own leg.
225
00:09:12,580 --> 00:09:14,570
Analogies were not Doc's strong suit either.
226
00:09:14,580 --> 00:09:15,830
Are we still talking about girls?
227
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:19,370
Chris,all I'm trying to say is Slaver Slav figured it out.
228
00:09:19,780 --> 00:09:24,620
If you want a girl to go crazy over you,be like Mount Everest.
229
00:09:24,630 --> 00:09:25,910
Be difficult.
230
00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:28,060
Try to get to her to eat her own leg off.
231
00:09:28,070 --> 00:09:31,580
And whatever you do,don't be nice.
232
00:09:31,590 --> 00:09:34,980
And again I say there's a reason why Doc lives alone.
233
00:09:35,370 --> 00:09:38,480
I was a bad boy years before Martin Lawrence and Will Smith.
234
00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:39,340
Hey,Chris.
235
00:09:39,820 --> 00:09:40,680
Do I know you?
236
00:09:40,690 --> 00:09:41,630
You don't remember me?
237
00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:42,900
Do I look like I rember you?
238
00:09:42,910 --> 00:09:44,230
I'm Yolanda.
239
00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:45,290
Yolanda?
240
00:09:45,300 --> 00:09:46,090
No.
241
00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:47,780
Sonia.Why you acting all funny?
242
00:09:47,790 --> 00:09:49,130
Look,I'm just trying to read.
243
00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:50,250
Why don't you go do something?
244
00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:53,140
I just wanted to talk to you for a minute.Dag!
245
00:09:53,150 --> 00:09:55,030
Did you come here to buy something or just get on my nerves?
246
00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,770
How come every time I come in here,you always playing me off?
247
00:09:57,780 --> 00:09:58,600
What's your name again?
248
00:09:58,610 --> 00:09:59,800
It's Carla.
249
00:09:59,810 --> 00:10:01,620
Does your head just do that,or is that a nervous condition?
250
00:10:01,630 --> 00:10:03,410
You ain't got to talk about nobody.
251
00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:04,250
What's up with that hat?
252
00:10:04,260 --> 00:10:05,250
You don't like it?
253
00:10:05,260 --> 00:10:07,230
If it's covering up a bald spot,it's fine.
254
00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:08,340
It's much better than your hair.
255
00:10:08,350 --> 00:10:09,560
What's wrong with my hair?
256
00:10:09,570 --> 00:10:11,040
What's not wrong with your hair?
257
00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:13,440
Call me.
258
00:10:14,590 --> 00:10:15,620
Call me.
259
00:10:15,970 --> 00:10:17,200
Call me.
260
00:10:21,130 --> 00:10:23,030
I didn't know if this would work on Tasha,
261
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:25,180
or if she had too much self-esteem.
262
00:10:26,420 --> 00:10:27,450
Hey,Chris.
263
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:28,130
What?
264
00:10:28,140 --> 00:10:29,180
I said hi.
265
00:10:29,190 --> 00:10:30,110
What's wrong with you?
266
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:31,320
Why does something got to be wrong with me?
267
00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:33,070
Maybe you just didn't say hi loud enough.
268
00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:34,650
Forget it.
269
00:10:34,660 --> 00:10:35,970
Damn!
270
00:10:35,980 --> 00:10:38,280
Why did I listen to an old fool that lives alone?
271
00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:40,370
Did I do something to you?
272
00:10:40,380 --> 00:10:41,610
No,but I wish you would.
273
00:10:41,620 --> 00:10:43,180
Girl,ain't nobody thinking about you.
274
00:10:43,190 --> 00:10:43,900
Okay.
275
00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:45,190
Except me.
276
00:10:47,010 --> 00:10:48,620
Are you going to the bus stop?
277
00:10:48,630 --> 00:10:49,670
Yeah.Why?
278
00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:51,010
Do you want me to walk with you?
279
00:10:51,020 --> 00:10:52,460
I don't care.
280
00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:57,890
You're trippin'.
281
00:10:57,900 --> 00:10:59,620
And you're falling for it.
282
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:06,430
I heard your father made Employee of the Month.
283
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:07,690
Who told you that?
284
00:11:07,700 --> 00:11:08,830
Tonya.
285
00:11:09,510 --> 00:11:10,820
The girl talk too much.
286
00:11:10,830 --> 00:11:12,010
That's true.
287
00:11:12,020 --> 00:11:13,260
You didn't want me to know?
288
00:11:13,270 --> 00:11:15,350
Nah,it's just that she be running her mouth.
289
00:11:17,030 --> 00:11:20,470
I got this free dinner at this place where Slaver Slav eats--
290
00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:22,450
place called Domaine et Mer.
291
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:25,060
He might be ignorant,but he loves good food.
292
00:11:25,070 --> 00:11:26,370
Slaver Slav?
293
00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:30,150
My mom wants to invite one more person.
294
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:31,580
I'm,like,"Yo,Mom,bus' it.
295
00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:33,280
Why we got to take one more person?
296
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,440
" There's more food for us.
297
00:11:35,450 --> 00:11:36,950
I wishIcould go.
298
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,640
He says the food is incredible.
299
00:11:38,910 --> 00:11:40,470
Yeah,well,that's what we gonna do.
300
00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:42,700
If youant to come,then come on.
301
00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,170
Are you asking me to go?
302
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,960
I ain't asking you twice.
303
00:11:47,970 --> 00:11:49,380
Thanks.
304
00:11:50,050 --> 00:11:51,840
It's a home run!
305
00:11:51,850 --> 00:11:53,980
And that ball is out of here.
306
00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:56,490
Hey,Ma.
307
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:57,380
Hey,sweetie.
308
00:11:57,390 --> 00:11:58,930
Found somebody to go to dinner with us.
309
00:11:58,940 --> 00:12:00,550
Oh,that's okay,baby.
310
00:12:00,560 --> 00:12:01,750
I decided to take Michael.
311
00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:02,750
Uncle Michael's coming?
312
00:12:02,760 --> 00:12:03,700
Yeah,man.
313
00:12:03,710 --> 00:12:05,900
I heard French food real good!
314
00:12:05,910 --> 00:12:07,790
That's French.
315
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,000
I've been studying,'cause I'm ready to go.
316
00:12:10,010 --> 00:12:11,090
Ooh,la,la.
317
00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,550
I can't wait.
318
00:12:13,030 --> 00:12:15,930
And I can't wait for you to choke on that spaghetti.
319
00:12:19,150 --> 00:12:23,810
le Michael was like trying to take a bone away from a pit bull.
320
00:12:23,820 --> 00:12:24,910
Let me get this straight.
321
00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:27,190
You want me to give up a free dinner for a girl?
322
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,180
Michael,please.
323
00:12:28,190 --> 00:12:29,000
I already invited her.
324
00:12:29,010 --> 00:12:30,840
I've been trying to get with her for I don't know how long.
325
00:12:30,850 --> 00:12:33,230
If I blow this,probably won't get another chance.
326
00:12:33,730 --> 00:12:34,920
I don't know.
327
00:12:35,330 --> 00:12:36,550
What do I get out of it?
328
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:37,360
What do you want?
329
00:12:37,370 --> 00:12:41,150
The one thing my uncle loved more than a free meal was a bunch of free meals.
330
00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:43,270
All it took was a shrimp basket.
331
00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:44,500
What's up?
332
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:46,600
Later.
333
00:12:47,270 --> 00:12:48,530
and a slopper.
334
00:12:48,540 --> 00:12:49,940
What's up?
335
00:12:50,560 --> 00:12:52,040
Later.
336
00:12:54,370 --> 00:12:55,360
What's all this?
337
00:12:55,370 --> 00:12:58,140
Well,I just thought that since we're going to a nice restaurant,
338
00:12:58,150 --> 00:12:59,940
we need to brush up on our manners.
339
00:12:59,950 --> 00:13:01,960
I don't want y'all in there embarrassing me.
340
00:13:01,970 --> 00:13:05,320
For a free meal,I don't care if y'all showed up butt-naked with socks on.
341
00:13:05,330 --> 00:13:07,880
If we were butt-naked,we wouldn't have socks on,would we?
342
00:13:07,890 --> 00:13:10,590
We're not even there yet,and I'm already embarrassed.
343
00:13:11,820 --> 00:13:12,790
What's going on?
344
00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:15,070
Mom is trying to teach us manners before we go out.
345
00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:15,830
Manners?
346
00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:17,460
Who's going to teach us how to use all these forks?
347
00:13:17,470 --> 00:13:18,910
I'm getting to that.
348
00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:19,910
Where's Michael?
349
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,240
He's the one needs to learn some manners.
350
00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:22,580
Oh,yeah,Uncle Michael stopped by earlier.
351
00:13:22,590 --> 00:13:23,630
He can't make it to dinner.
352
00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:25,950
Oh,well,I don't know who else to invite.
353
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:26,800
How about Tasha?
354
00:13:26,810 --> 00:13:27,640
Tasha?
355
00:13:27,650 --> 00:13:29,960
Do I have to buyeverybody shrimp and sloppers?
356
00:13:29,970 --> 00:13:31,100
Is that okay with you,baby?
357
00:13:31,110 --> 00:13:32,420
Sounds like a good idea.
358
00:13:32,430 --> 00:13:33,430
Oh,good.
359
00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:35,460
Translation: she eats like a white girl.
360
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:37,770
My father was really excited,
361
00:13:37,780 --> 00:13:41,590
but he was about to find out that his free dinner had a high price.
362
00:13:42,690 --> 00:13:43,500
Good evening,sir.
363
00:13:43,510 --> 00:13:44,450
May I help you?
364
00:13:44,460 --> 00:13:46,570
Yes.We have a reservation for six.
365
00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:48,630
Um,it was made by the newspaper.
366
00:13:48,940 --> 00:13:50,460
I'm the Employee of the Month.
367
00:13:50,890 --> 00:13:53,180
That look means,"Oh,great,poor people."
368
00:13:53,190 --> 00:13:55,890
Employee of the Month,party of six.
369
00:13:56,180 --> 00:13:58,060
I don't have anything available right now,
370
00:13:58,070 --> 00:13:59,770
but if you have a seat,I'll be right with you.
371
00:13:59,780 --> 00:14:02,560
Never trust a black man who speaks French.
372
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:04,770
Banks party for six,8:00 p.m.?
373
00:14:04,780 --> 00:14:06,360
Bonsoir,Mr.Banks.
374
00:14:06,370 --> 00:14:07,360
Right this way.
375
00:14:07,370 --> 00:14:08,580
Ah,good.Come on,gang.
376
00:14:08,590 --> 00:14:09,320
Oui,oui.
377
00:14:09,330 --> 00:14:11,510
Oui,ouireally means white,white.
378
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:12,740
Bon appétit!
379
00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:14,000
Thank you.
380
00:14:19,830 --> 00:14:23,250
She's about to smack the duck liver out of him.
381
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:25,000
May I help you?
382
00:14:25,010 --> 00:14:27,710
I thought you said you didn't have anything available.
383
00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:28,840
We don't.
384
00:14:28,850 --> 00:14:31,820
But you had something available for them.
385
00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:33,080
They are.
386
00:14:33,090 --> 00:14:34,330
how do I put this?
387
00:14:34,670 --> 00:14:35,750
They are paying.
388
00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:36,760
They're white.
389
00:14:36,770 --> 00:14:37,740
Oh,hold on.
390
00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:38,620
We're paying.
391
00:14:38,630 --> 00:14:39,460
No,you're not.
392
00:14:39,470 --> 00:14:40,590
You're not white!
393
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:44,070
We provide the newspaper with one complimentary table a month.
394
00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:47,610
The provide us with a reduced ad rate.
395
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:48,710
So you're not paying.
396
00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:50,530
Now,if you check your coupon.
397
00:14:50,930 --> 00:14:52,620
You do have your coupon,don't you?
398
00:14:52,630 --> 00:14:54,170
Does he know who he's talking to?
399
00:14:54,180 --> 00:14:59,650
It says right here that promotional seating is subject to the manager's discretion.
400
00:14:59,930 --> 00:15:02,420
I am the manager; it's my discretion.
401
00:15:03,140 --> 00:15:05,640
So are you telling us that we can't sit down?
402
00:15:06,670 --> 00:15:08,120
You-You can sit down.
403
00:15:09,020 --> 00:15:10,650
Just can't sit at the same table.
404
00:15:10,660 --> 00:15:11,890
What?
405
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:15,880
This is so nice.
406
00:15:15,890 --> 00:15:17,700
I wonder what Slaver Slav would order.
407
00:15:18,110 --> 00:15:19,280
Bet it be cheap.
408
00:15:19,290 --> 00:15:20,680
And fried.
409
00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:26,180
Nothing's cooler than lighting a match for no reason.
410
00:15:26,790 --> 00:15:28,680
Do you think the kids will be okay,baby?
411
00:15:33,470 --> 00:15:34,440
They'll be fine.
412
00:15:34,450 --> 00:15:36,540
Meanwhile,back at theDiff'rent Strokestable.
413
00:15:36,550 --> 00:15:37,630
This is so cool.
414
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:39,080
Thanks for letting us sit with you guys.
415
00:15:39,090 --> 00:15:40,370
No problem at all.
416
00:15:40,380 --> 00:15:43,110
You're our guests,so feel free to order anything you want.
417
00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:44,150
For real?
418
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:45,590
For real.
419
00:15:47,010 --> 00:15:50,030
Meanwhile,I had started acting like a bad boy for Tasha,
420
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:52,320
but ended up being a jerk to everybody.
421
00:15:52,330 --> 00:15:53,420
Can I take your order?
422
00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:54,600
Bus' it.
423
00:15:54,610 --> 00:15:56,000
We get some French fries?
424
00:15:56,010 --> 00:15:57,940
We don't have French fries.
425
00:15:57,950 --> 00:16:00,090
Y'all call yourself a French restaurant.
426
00:16:00,940 --> 00:16:02,160
All right,what y'all got?
427
00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:03,960
Uh,have you had a chance to look at the menu?
428
00:16:03,970 --> 00:16:05,150
Nah.
429
00:16:05,470 --> 00:16:06,790
Y'all got some fish?
430
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:07,850
We have several types.
431
00:16:07,860 --> 00:16:10,200
All right,well,fry some of that up for me,get us some drinks,
432
00:16:10,210 --> 00:16:12,800
some salad with French dressing some of them escargots,
433
00:16:12,810 --> 00:16:13,990
some French onion soup,
434
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:15,670
some French toast,and for dessert,
435
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:17,030
some French vanilla ice cream.
436
00:16:17,460 --> 00:16:18,680
Anything else?
437
00:16:19,790 --> 00:16:21,500
Y'all got French mustard?
438
00:16:21,510 --> 00:16:22,780
I'll check.
439
00:16:23,610 --> 00:16:25,460
Check on then.
440
00:16:31,010 --> 00:16:32,410
You want one?
441
00:16:37,090 --> 00:16:38,380
Excuse me?
442
00:16:39,590 --> 00:16:42,430
That's the French version of black-on-black crime?
443
00:16:43,220 --> 00:16:44,860
So,what are you having,baby?
444
00:16:44,870 --> 00:16:46,430
I'm about to have a fit.
445
00:16:54,150 --> 00:16:55,210
May I help you?
446
00:16:55,220 --> 00:16:56,910
Do you see us sitting here?
447
00:16:57,380 --> 00:16:59,110
I'm not understanding the question.
448
00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:02,210
Look,man,we just want to have our dinner and get out of here.
449
00:17:02,220 --> 00:17:03,790
Could you please take our order?
450
00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:04,750
Yes.
451
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:05,760
What would you like?
452
00:17:05,770 --> 00:17:06,830
Oh,yes.Okay,um,
453
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:08,320
I was looking at this item right here.
454
00:17:08,330 --> 00:17:10,000
Excuse me.
455
00:17:11,210 --> 00:17:13,020
See that.
456
00:17:14,050 --> 00:17:15,090
Is there something wrong?
457
00:17:15,100 --> 00:17:17,190
Yes.They gave you the wrong menus.
458
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:20,430
These are the Employee of the Month menus.
459
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:21,670
What?
460
00:17:23,070 --> 00:17:24,860
There's only three things on here.
461
00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:26,980
Yes,and we're out of the chicken.
462
00:17:26,990 --> 00:17:27,840
What?
463
00:17:27,850 --> 00:17:29,270
Take your time.
464
00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:33,020
But I wanted the chicken.
465
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,300
I've never had coq au vin before.
466
00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:38,490
You two have such great manners.
467
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:40,150
Your mother must be very proud.
468
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:43,380
Well,she said if we didn't act right,she'd slap the caviar out of us.
469
00:17:45,820 --> 00:17:47,450
Béarnaise,anyone?
470
00:17:50,530 --> 00:17:52,770
I don't think you're supposed to have your feet on the table.
471
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:54,400
Ain't nobody ask you.
472
00:17:57,050 --> 00:18:00,270
Young man,I'm going to have to ask you to take your feet off the table.
473
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:01,780
What if I don't feel like it?
474
00:18:02,330 --> 00:18:04,420
Then I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
475
00:18:07,290 --> 00:18:09,290
What if I don't feel like doing that either?
476
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:13,580
You're with the Employee of the Month,aren't you?
477
00:18:18,590 --> 00:18:20,660
What is going on over there?
478
00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:23,730
Is that Chris?
479
00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:25,230
What?
480
00:18:46,530 --> 00:18:47,530
Chris!
481
00:18:47,540 --> 00:18:49,010
What?!
482
00:18:54,990 --> 00:18:56,530
Hey,baby.
483
00:18:57,510 --> 00:18:58,320
Ma?
484
00:18:58,330 --> 00:18:59,890
How's everything going in here?
485
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,480
Oh,Doctor,is he going to be okay?
486
00:19:02,490 --> 00:19:04,140
Well,I think we'll be able to get it out,
487
00:19:04,150 --> 00:19:06,180
but you won't be able to wear that shoe again.
488
00:19:06,190 --> 00:19:07,680
Hang in there,big guy.
489
00:19:09,980 --> 00:19:12,140
How you feeling,sweetie?
490
00:19:12,150 --> 00:19:13,710
Not too good.
491
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:16,310
Well,why were you acting like that?
492
00:19:16,620 --> 00:19:18,670
Just trying to impress Tasha.
493
00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:22,270
By acting like an idiot?
494
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:25,800
No.She said she liked b boys,like Slaver Slav.
495
00:19:25,810 --> 00:19:27,290
Trying to act like him.
496
00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:28,720
Without the money.
497
00:19:28,730 --> 00:19:31,200
Baby,you can only be who you are.
498
00:19:31,210 --> 00:19:33,820
If she doesn't want you,then you don't want her.
499
00:19:33,830 --> 00:19:36,240
That day I learned the most important lesson in life:
500
00:19:36,250 --> 00:19:38,870
be yourself,oret a pump in your ass.
501
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:41,160
Mommy's gonna get you some ice chips,okay?
502
00:19:41,170 --> 00:19:43,030
Better get a shoehorn,too.
503
00:19:44,490 --> 00:19:45,790
Hi,sweetie.
504
00:19:47,900 --> 00:19:49,390
Hey,Chris.
505
00:19:50,110 --> 00:19:51,270
Tasha?
506
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:52,140
Yeah.
507
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:53,330
Are you okay?
508
00:19:53,340 --> 00:19:55,450
Yeah,I'll be fine.
509
00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:59,520
I just wanted to apologize for acting like such an idiot.
510
00:19:59,950 --> 00:20:01,180
Forgive me?
511
00:20:01,190 --> 00:20:02,810
Yeah,it's okay.
512
00:20:02,820 --> 00:20:04,400
That's what friends are for.
513
00:20:04,410 --> 00:20:06,020
Thanks,Dionne Warwick.
514
00:20:06,910 --> 00:20:08,460
Is this your x-ray?
515
00:20:08,470 --> 00:20:10,060
Yeah.
516
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:12,660
Boy,you so crazy.
517
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,110
Crazy like a boy with a shoe up his butt.
518
00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:19,710
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
35458
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof