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1
00:00:00,953 --> 00:00:02,686
Laverne?
2
00:00:04,211 --> 00:00:05,477
Are you in there?
3
00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:12,624
Laverne?
4
00:00:13,154 --> 00:00:15,854
Uh... uh, sorry, dear,
Mrs. bender,
5
00:00:15,890 --> 00:00:16,855
uh, I'll be right with you.
6
00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:21,549
Just, uh. Just have to
find your file.
7
00:00:23,230 --> 00:00:24,581
Here we go. Here we go...
8
00:00:24,599 --> 00:00:25,999
Bender, Sarah. All right.
9
00:00:26,034 --> 00:00:29,102
Outta my way I'm a-late,
dang burnit!
10
00:00:30,339 --> 00:00:32,620
Morning, doctor.
Laverne, what happened to you?
11
00:00:32,651 --> 00:00:33,851
I don't know what
you're talkin' about.
12
00:00:33,875 --> 00:00:35,408
Excuse me,
I've got coffee to make.
13
00:00:35,444 --> 00:00:37,195
Well, wait, wait, whoa!
14
00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:39,679
Forget the coffee.
What happened to you?
15
00:00:39,715 --> 00:00:42,299
Oh, this? I fell off my roof.
16
00:00:43,234 --> 00:00:44,751
Regular or decaf?
17
00:00:44,786 --> 00:00:46,353
No. No. Never mind that.
18
00:00:46,388 --> 00:00:48,521
What were you doing on the roof?
19
00:00:48,557 --> 00:00:50,457
Well, I's paintin' the eaves.
20
00:00:50,492 --> 00:00:51,758
My landlord, Mr. yevin,
21
00:00:51,793 --> 00:00:53,660
takes a couple of hundred bucks
off the rent.
22
00:00:53,695 --> 00:00:55,440
I do it every year,
and what with you pay me,
23
00:00:55,464 --> 00:00:57,831
I need all the help I can get.
24
00:00:59,191 --> 00:01:00,633
Well, you should be
home resting.
25
00:01:00,669 --> 00:01:03,003
I'll call the agency,
get somebody to fill in.
26
00:01:03,038 --> 00:01:06,339
It is just a broken tibia
and a fractured radius.
27
00:01:06,375 --> 00:01:08,575
No big deal.
Laverne, you're injured.
28
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:09,676
I want you to go home.
29
00:01:09,711 --> 00:01:10,951
That's why you have sick leave.
30
00:01:10,979 --> 00:01:13,380
Doctor, I have worked for you
31
00:01:13,415 --> 00:01:15,482
for six years, eight month
and three weeks.
32
00:01:15,517 --> 00:01:17,283
How many times
have I called in sick?
33
00:01:17,319 --> 00:01:18,852
- Um...
- None.
34
00:01:18,887 --> 00:01:21,488
I have never missed
a day's work in my life.
35
00:01:21,523 --> 00:01:23,890
My mama and my daddy worked
nearly 50 odd years a piece.
36
00:01:23,925 --> 00:01:25,136
They never missed a day's work.
37
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:26,860
My grandparents
never missed a day's work,
38
00:01:26,895 --> 00:01:30,363
and my grandma's been sucked
through a combine three times.
39
00:01:31,700 --> 00:01:35,784
The point is, the higby people
do not miss work.
40
00:01:36,267 --> 00:01:37,548
Now, just because
I have a broken leg,
41
00:01:37,572 --> 00:01:38,938
and a fractured radius,
42
00:01:38,974 --> 00:01:41,775
and a little lead poisonin',
does not mean I'm...
43
00:01:43,211 --> 00:01:47,947
upset my ancestral record.
You have lead poisoning too?
44
00:01:47,983 --> 00:01:50,750
Mr. yevin
makes me use old paint,
45
00:01:50,786 --> 00:01:53,153
and when that five-gallon bucket
hit me on the head,
46
00:01:53,188 --> 00:01:55,722
a little dripped in my mouth.
47
00:01:55,757 --> 00:01:57,857
Now, that reminds me,
if I start a-retchin'
48
00:01:57,893 --> 00:01:59,526
and/or convulsin',
just let me be.
49
00:01:59,561 --> 00:02:02,662
They said
it'd stop in a moment or two.
50
00:02:02,697 --> 00:02:06,666
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have coffee to make.
51
00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:17,477
Life goes on and so do we
52
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:21,448
Just how we do it
is no mystery
53
00:02:21,483 --> 00:02:23,316
One by one -
one by one
54
00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:25,285
we fill the days
55
00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:29,189
we find a thousand
different ways
56
00:02:29,224 --> 00:02:32,092
Sometimes the answer
can be hard to find
57
00:02:32,094 --> 00:02:33,359
Hard to find
58
00:02:33,395 --> 00:02:35,862
that's something
I will never be
59
00:02:35,897 --> 00:02:41,163
I'm always here
for anything you need
60
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:44,804
Anything you need
61
00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:48,741
rain or shine
I'll be the one
62
00:02:48,777 --> 00:02:52,979
To share it all
as life goes on
63
00:02:53,014 --> 00:02:55,515
We share it all
64
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:59,586
as life goes on
65
00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:23,691
I know.
66
00:03:23,726 --> 00:03:26,739
Just think of yourself
in a hot tub.
67
00:03:29,446 --> 00:03:32,043
You've had too much chardonnay.
68
00:03:32,983 --> 00:03:34,799
You took a valium.
69
00:03:35,785 --> 00:03:38,538
You start to slip away,
70
00:03:39,055 --> 00:03:41,720
slowly, peacefully.
71
00:03:42,692 --> 00:03:44,659
It's been a rough life, anyway.
72
00:03:44,694 --> 00:03:48,029
Wandering the ocean floor,
eating the crap off rocks
73
00:03:48,064 --> 00:03:50,932
that other sea life won't touch.
74
00:03:50,967 --> 00:03:52,901
Don't look down.
75
00:03:52,936 --> 00:03:57,939
Barbara!
76
00:03:57,974 --> 00:04:00,108
Please, I feel guilty enough
about this.
77
00:04:00,143 --> 00:04:02,021
Why don't we just take
aunt Susan out to dinner?
78
00:04:02,045 --> 00:04:03,678
My aunt Susan
has been eating out
79
00:04:03,713 --> 00:04:04,913
for the last 20 years,
80
00:04:04,948 --> 00:04:06,614
she should have
a home-cooked meal.
81
00:04:06,650 --> 00:04:08,494
You know, I really like her,
I just wish she'd settle down
82
00:04:08,518 --> 00:04:09,751
so we could see more of her.
83
00:04:09,786 --> 00:04:11,853
And why can't you put out
regular appetizers
84
00:04:11,888 --> 00:04:13,121
like normal human beings?
85
00:04:13,156 --> 00:04:16,142
My hors d'oeuvres
tell a saga, Barbara.
86
00:04:16,559 --> 00:04:19,060
They're my interpretation
of aunt Susan's life story
87
00:04:19,095 --> 00:04:22,327
as told with
very expensive foodstuffs.
88
00:04:23,066 --> 00:04:25,044
You are so weird.
89
00:04:25,368 --> 00:04:28,102
Our story starts out
with the untimely death
90
00:04:28,138 --> 00:04:30,471
of aunt Susan's wealthy,
industrialist husband,
91
00:04:30,507 --> 00:04:32,432
30 years ago.
92
00:04:33,243 --> 00:04:34,742
Oh, that explains
the little cessna
93
00:04:34,778 --> 00:04:36,711
scattered across
the mountain of pate.
94
00:04:36,746 --> 00:04:37,979
Right.
95
00:04:38,014 --> 00:04:40,882
And then we follow her
as she travels the globe,
96
00:04:40,917 --> 00:04:43,451
moving from one philanthropic
deed to the next,
97
00:04:43,486 --> 00:04:46,020
helping refugees,
victims of disaster,
98
00:04:46,056 --> 00:04:49,159
meeting world leader
after world leader.
99
00:04:49,926 --> 00:04:52,694
And what are those
little wieners represent?
100
00:04:56,032 --> 00:04:57,894
The Warren commission.
101
00:05:01,371 --> 00:05:03,604
Aunt Susan was
one of the very first
102
00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:05,940
to call their findings absurd.
103
00:05:06,209 --> 00:05:08,176
Boy, mom and aunt Susan
were different.
104
00:05:08,211 --> 00:05:09,622
I mean, aunt Susan
traveled the world,
105
00:05:09,646 --> 00:05:11,112
and mom was such a homebody.
106
00:05:11,147 --> 00:05:13,233
It's hard to believe
they were sisters.
107
00:05:13,783 --> 00:05:16,751
I've heard the same thing
said about us, Barbara.
108
00:05:18,254 --> 00:05:20,381
You heard it from me, Carol.
109
00:05:22,592 --> 00:05:23,558
Good evening, ladies.
110
00:05:23,593 --> 00:05:25,093
- Hi, daddy.
- Hi.
111
00:05:25,128 --> 00:05:27,662
No aunt Susan yet? Figures.
112
00:05:27,697 --> 00:05:33,134
Carol, look,
this looks marvelous.
113
00:05:33,169 --> 00:05:36,757
Daddy, you just ate a boatload
full of starving Haitians.
114
00:05:41,378 --> 00:05:42,737
There she is.
115
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:43,791
All right.
116
00:05:45,167 --> 00:05:46,581
How do I look?
117
00:05:46,616 --> 00:05:48,271
Older than me.
118
00:05:49,744 --> 00:05:50,918
It's aunt Susan.
119
00:05:50,954 --> 00:05:53,988
Aunt Susan!
120
00:05:54,024 --> 00:05:56,446
Look at... look at you!
121
00:05:57,427 --> 00:05:59,594
Is there a doctor in the house?
122
00:05:59,629 --> 00:06:01,922
Depends, do you have insurance?
123
00:06:02,966 --> 00:06:05,666
- How the hell are you, Harry?
- Same ole, same ole.
124
00:06:05,702 --> 00:06:07,179
- Oh, good.
- Aunt Susan, you look terrific.
125
00:06:07,203 --> 00:06:08,302
Welcome home.
126
00:06:08,338 --> 00:06:10,805
Oh... oh, I almost forgot.
This is Roberto.
127
00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:13,267
Oh my god, Roberto chulec.
128
00:06:13,410 --> 00:06:15,176
You're the El salvadoran
dissident
129
00:06:15,211 --> 00:06:17,790
who was jailed for seven years.
130
00:06:19,315 --> 00:06:21,597
I am moved, sir.
131
00:06:22,585 --> 00:06:24,285
- Gracias.
- Ah, Carol, that's...
132
00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:25,853
aunt Susan,
all your work paid off.
133
00:06:25,889 --> 00:06:28,497
Roberto chulec is free!
134
00:06:30,226 --> 00:06:33,290
- Ah...
- Carol, he's a cabdriver.
135
00:06:38,130 --> 00:06:39,363
So?
136
00:06:39,398 --> 00:06:41,065
Lech walesa was an electrician.
137
00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:43,701
God, you are such snob, Barbara.
138
00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:46,103
This man captured
the hearts of his nation,
139
00:06:46,138 --> 00:06:48,706
no, the world, when he stood up
to the dictatorial regime
140
00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:51,696
and said... what was it you said?
141
00:06:52,178 --> 00:06:54,653
Where
do you want your bags, lady?
142
00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:00,951
But, my biggest thrill
143
00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:02,987
was when I was on stage
with Paul McCartney
144
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:05,022
at the amnesty
international concert,
145
00:07:05,057 --> 00:07:07,491
and I got a standing ovation.
146
00:07:07,526 --> 00:07:09,159
A standing ovation?
147
00:07:09,195 --> 00:07:11,261
Yeah, I pulled the plug
on Linda McCartney's mic
148
00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,030
in the middle of hey Jude.
149
00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:18,669
Oh, you have met
some great people.
150
00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:21,105
I bet you've met
some really fascinating men.
151
00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:24,041
Well, there have been a few
along the way
152
00:07:24,076 --> 00:07:27,911
since Albert passed on,
but my work keeps me very busy.
153
00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:30,948
Takes a very understanding
man to date your aunt Susan.
154
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:33,784
I mean, she never knows
when some lizard
155
00:07:33,819 --> 00:07:36,887
is going to call up saying
he's about to become extinct.
156
00:07:36,922 --> 00:07:38,956
Very funny, Harry.
157
00:07:38,991 --> 00:07:40,507
I'll put the coffee on.
158
00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,794
Maybe living with
your uncle Albert spoiled me,
159
00:07:43,829 --> 00:07:46,810
but I think most men
are just like children.
160
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,915
Hi, there.
161
00:07:50,169 --> 00:07:51,635
You must be aunt Susan.
162
00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:53,573
I'm Charles dietz.
163
00:07:54,794 --> 00:07:56,618
Oh, don't worry about that,
that's just a little blistex.
164
00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:58,705
I got this sore on my lip.
165
00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,244
Charley, you weren't invited.
166
00:08:00,279 --> 00:08:01,507
Go home.
167
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:03,982
Delicious.
168
00:08:04,016 --> 00:08:06,083
What are these? Can't you tell?
169
00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:09,314
Those are victims of the worst
earthquake in Armenia.
170
00:08:11,546 --> 00:08:13,182
Tastes like chicken.
171
00:08:13,781 --> 00:08:16,248
You know, you and I
have a lot in common.
172
00:08:16,284 --> 00:08:18,284
I'm a world traveler,
you're a world traveler.
173
00:08:18,319 --> 00:08:20,186
You've devoted your life
to charity.
174
00:08:20,221 --> 00:08:21,420
I'm involved with a charity
175
00:08:21,456 --> 00:08:23,556
for the advancement
of little people.
176
00:08:23,591 --> 00:08:26,025
The advancement
of little people?
177
00:08:26,060 --> 00:08:28,433
Yeah. Dwarf tossing.
178
00:08:30,732 --> 00:08:32,631
I'm the guest of honor
down at o'Riley's.
179
00:08:32,667 --> 00:08:35,579
I get to throw out
the first dwarf.
180
00:08:37,196 --> 00:08:39,605
It's for charity.
That's charity?
181
00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:40,806
Sure.
182
00:08:40,842 --> 00:08:43,743
The money goes to patch
the little fellas up.
183
00:08:44,746 --> 00:08:46,957
God, it feels good to give.
184
00:08:51,352 --> 00:08:53,019
Well, you're
pretty good at this.
185
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,754
Yeah. Well, we've got a system.
186
00:08:54,789 --> 00:08:56,088
Carol cooks, I scrape.
187
00:08:56,124 --> 00:08:58,531
Barbara loads the dishwasher
and dreyfuss...
188
00:09:06,034 --> 00:09:07,668
what's the matter, Harry?
189
00:09:09,037 --> 00:09:10,247
Nothing. Nothing's the matter.
190
00:09:10,271 --> 00:09:11,849
What makes you think
something's the matter?
191
00:09:11,873 --> 00:09:14,373
Well, you haven't said
two words to me all evening.
192
00:09:14,409 --> 00:09:16,017
What's bothering you, Harry?
193
00:09:16,978 --> 00:09:18,577
Where the hell
have you been, Susan?
194
00:09:18,613 --> 00:09:19,745
What?
195
00:09:19,781 --> 00:09:21,225
You traipse in here
after eight years
196
00:09:21,249 --> 00:09:24,617
as if it were yesterday?
You want me to leave?
197
00:09:24,652 --> 00:09:26,691
No. No, I don't want you to go.
198
00:09:28,272 --> 00:09:30,322
Why didn't you come
to Libby's funeral?
199
00:09:30,358 --> 00:09:31,524
Harry, I told you,
200
00:09:31,559 --> 00:09:34,003
I was tied to a tree
in the Amazon.
201
00:09:34,495 --> 00:09:37,060
You tied yourself
to the tree, Susan.
202
00:09:38,813 --> 00:09:40,453
The rain forest
could have waited for you
203
00:09:40,477 --> 00:09:41,775
to bury your sister.
204
00:09:43,137 --> 00:09:44,103
I know, you're right.
205
00:09:44,138 --> 00:09:45,436
I just couldn't deal with it.
206
00:09:46,181 --> 00:09:47,619
I can't deal with it now.
207
00:09:47,658 --> 00:09:49,909
I... i... i can't believe it's real.
208
00:09:49,944 --> 00:09:51,554
It's not real to me.
209
00:09:52,246 --> 00:09:53,550
We're family.
210
00:09:54,048 --> 00:09:55,826
We're here to help each other
through those rough times.
211
00:09:55,850 --> 00:09:57,950
You're part of this family,
Susan,
212
00:09:57,985 --> 00:10:00,653
and we've missed you.
I've missed you too Harry.
213
00:10:00,688 --> 00:10:02,231
That's why I'm here.
214
00:10:05,369 --> 00:10:07,599
I guess I've been away too long.
215
00:10:09,917 --> 00:10:10,921
Come here.
216
00:10:10,956 --> 00:10:14,004
We're glad you finally
came home, dear.
217
00:10:15,260 --> 00:10:17,561
You know, you should know
218
00:10:17,596 --> 00:10:20,912
that Libby was very, very proud
of her little sister.
219
00:10:21,233 --> 00:10:22,899
Sometimes
I think she envied you.
220
00:10:22,935 --> 00:10:24,842
Sometimes I envied her.
221
00:10:25,204 --> 00:10:26,837
- Oh.
- Oh, good.
222
00:10:26,872 --> 00:10:28,609
You guys are still up.
223
00:10:29,908 --> 00:10:32,109
I just wanted to let you know
224
00:10:32,144 --> 00:10:34,745
that your words
had a profound effect upon me.
225
00:10:34,780 --> 00:10:38,491
I did not go
to the dwarf tossing contest.
226
00:10:39,351 --> 00:10:41,284
You were right.
It was cheap, degrading,
227
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:43,453
and totally insensitive.
228
00:10:43,489 --> 00:10:45,022
Well, I'm glad to hear that.
229
00:10:45,057 --> 00:10:46,890
So I picked up
a couple of fat babes,
230
00:10:46,925 --> 00:10:49,026
got 'em dru...
231
00:10:53,847 --> 00:10:55,499
I just wanted to say good night.
232
00:10:55,534 --> 00:10:57,516
Oh, good night, honey.
233
00:10:58,303 --> 00:11:00,070
- Are you still working?
- Ah.
234
00:11:00,105 --> 00:11:02,439
This is your vacation.
You should be relaxing.
235
00:11:02,474 --> 00:11:04,241
I know, but if I'm not
doing something,
236
00:11:04,276 --> 00:11:05,864
I just go crazy.
237
00:11:06,245 --> 00:11:09,079
I can't stop fidgeting.
Drives everyone nuts.
238
00:11:09,114 --> 00:11:11,693
Mother Teresa
once tried to punch me out.
239
00:11:12,217 --> 00:11:14,718
Have you ever tried those
subliminal relaxation tapes?
240
00:11:14,753 --> 00:11:16,953
I use them every night
to go to sleep.
241
00:11:16,989 --> 00:11:18,889
Do you still have
trouble sleeping?
242
00:11:18,924 --> 00:11:19,927
Yes.
243
00:11:19,959 --> 00:11:22,413
I remember when
you were a little girl.
244
00:11:22,545 --> 00:11:24,478
You would lie awake all night
245
00:11:24,514 --> 00:11:26,914
and be afraid that
there'd be a man in your room.
246
00:11:26,950 --> 00:11:28,338
Yeah.
247
00:11:33,022 --> 00:11:35,911
Now, I lie awake
wondering why there isn't one.
248
00:11:37,627 --> 00:11:39,093
Listen,
your father was telling me
249
00:11:39,128 --> 00:11:40,963
about this hunger project.
250
00:11:40,997 --> 00:11:42,441
It's called
the Miami food exchange.
251
00:11:42,465 --> 00:11:43,831
- Yeah.
- We set up booths
252
00:11:43,866 --> 00:11:46,534
around those places where
people buy food by the case,
253
00:11:46,569 --> 00:11:48,269
that way they're inclined
to give more
254
00:11:48,304 --> 00:11:49,481
since they already have so much.
255
00:11:49,505 --> 00:11:51,906
Our food donations went up 29%.
256
00:11:51,941 --> 00:11:54,575
Hmm! It's amazing.
257
00:11:54,610 --> 00:11:55,576
What?
258
00:11:55,611 --> 00:11:57,078
You know who you remind me of?
259
00:11:57,113 --> 00:12:00,066
Please, don't say
emo Philips with breasts.
260
00:12:00,090 --> 00:12:01,140
It's just...
261
00:12:03,019 --> 00:12:05,453
I was thinking of someone
more in the immediate family.
262
00:12:05,488 --> 00:12:08,022
Oh, yeah. My mother.
263
00:12:08,057 --> 00:12:09,190
People say it's the eyes.
264
00:12:09,225 --> 00:12:11,125
No, Barbara reminds me
of your mother.
265
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:12,994
You remind me of me.
266
00:12:13,029 --> 00:12:14,954
- I do?
- Yes.
267
00:12:16,299 --> 00:12:18,993
Carol, are you happy
with your life?
268
00:12:19,702 --> 00:12:22,103
Well, I'm down to twice a week
with Dr. Grossman,
269
00:12:22,138 --> 00:12:23,738
if that's what you mean.
270
00:12:23,773 --> 00:12:25,451
I mean, you do
all these wonderful things.
271
00:12:25,475 --> 00:12:28,409
You care about the earth,
you care about people,
272
00:12:28,444 --> 00:12:30,211
maybe you'd be happier
if you could do
273
00:12:30,246 --> 00:12:32,980
all these lovely things
on a grander scale.
274
00:12:33,016 --> 00:12:33,981
What do you mean?
275
00:12:34,017 --> 00:12:35,950
I want you to come
and work for me.
276
00:12:35,985 --> 00:12:38,180
- I could use you.
- Me?
277
00:12:38,621 --> 00:12:40,121
Well, what could I do?
278
00:12:40,156 --> 00:12:41,756
I mean, I wouldn't know
how to act
279
00:12:41,791 --> 00:12:43,958
around all those famous people.
280
00:12:43,982 --> 00:12:46,200
Well, that's what I thought,
when I first started.
281
00:12:46,229 --> 00:12:48,541
I thought, what could I
possibly have to offer?
282
00:12:48,580 --> 00:12:51,165
But one person
can make a difference.
283
00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:52,767
If it's the right person.
284
00:12:52,802 --> 00:12:54,502
And you think
I'm the right person?
285
00:12:54,537 --> 00:12:56,337
I know you're the right person.
286
00:12:56,372 --> 00:12:59,440
Oh, aunt Susan. Oh.
287
00:12:59,475 --> 00:13:02,732
I'll never get to sleep tonight.
Of course, I'll come.
288
00:13:03,012 --> 00:13:04,667
I've been called.
289
00:13:06,949 --> 00:13:08,446
I will serve.
290
00:13:09,252 --> 00:13:10,451
That's nice, dear.
291
00:13:10,486 --> 00:13:12,953
I will not rest
until every mouth is fed,
292
00:13:12,989 --> 00:13:15,656
till every tear is wiped,
till every wound is healed.
293
00:13:15,691 --> 00:13:17,458
- Good.
- I will raise my sword
294
00:13:17,493 --> 00:13:19,360
to fight world hunger,
295
00:13:19,395 --> 00:13:21,295
and my staff
shall quell injustice
296
00:13:21,330 --> 00:13:24,398
until there is an end
to all world suffering.
297
00:13:24,434 --> 00:13:25,866
Where do I start?
298
00:13:25,902 --> 00:13:28,801
Why don't you start
with a vow of silence?
299
00:13:34,799 --> 00:13:37,246
Owee, daddy! Owee!
300
00:13:39,288 --> 00:13:40,870
Honey, that was a cotton swab.
301
00:13:40,905 --> 00:13:42,173
I haven't even...
302
00:13:42,843 --> 00:13:44,707
I haven't even given you
the shot yet.
303
00:13:44,742 --> 00:13:47,142
How many injections
to I have to get?
304
00:13:47,412 --> 00:13:48,652
Eight.
305
00:13:48,927 --> 00:13:50,686
Oh, let me give her six.
306
00:13:52,050 --> 00:13:54,050
No, no, Barbara,
I'm giving her the injections.
307
00:13:54,085 --> 00:13:55,451
You're just here to torment her.
308
00:13:55,486 --> 00:13:57,586
And you're doing
a very good job.
309
00:13:57,622 --> 00:13:59,299
Are all these shots
really necessary, daddy?
310
00:13:59,323 --> 00:14:02,101
Honey, you're going to Africa.
311
00:14:04,907 --> 00:14:06,929
Have you ever seen
an African mosquito?
312
00:14:06,964 --> 00:14:10,433
They're this big.
Maybe they'll carry you away.
313
00:14:10,468 --> 00:14:13,053
- Stop it.
- Oh, that reminds me.
314
00:14:15,018 --> 00:14:16,439
Laverne. Laverne.
315
00:14:16,474 --> 00:14:18,574
Where are those
malaria pills I ordered?
316
00:14:18,609 --> 00:14:21,141
Keep your smock on.
317
00:14:22,046 --> 00:14:24,980
Ow! How many more, daddy?
318
00:14:25,016 --> 00:14:26,326
Listen. Honey,
it's gonna be worth it.
319
00:14:26,350 --> 00:14:28,028
You're gonna be
able to see the whole world,
320
00:14:28,052 --> 00:14:29,919
and Susan'll get a chance
to know you better.
321
00:14:29,954 --> 00:14:31,520
It's gonna be good
for the two of you.
322
00:14:31,556 --> 00:14:32,966
Hey, daddy, let me give her
the big shot
323
00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:34,997
with the humongous needle.
324
00:14:37,228 --> 00:14:39,328
Barbara, wait in the car.
325
00:14:39,363 --> 00:14:41,745
But, she hasn't even cried yet.
326
00:14:42,033 --> 00:14:43,235
Barbara.
327
00:14:43,968 --> 00:14:45,331
Get out!
328
00:14:46,070 --> 00:14:47,703
Ow!
329
00:14:52,233 --> 00:14:54,166
How long do you think
you'll be gone?
330
00:14:54,202 --> 00:14:56,821
Aunt Susan says
at least six months.
331
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:00,482
Oh.
332
00:15:01,009 --> 00:15:02,147
Oh, what?
333
00:15:02,377 --> 00:15:03,458
Oh, what?
334
00:15:03,811 --> 00:15:05,144
I'm gonna miss you.
335
00:15:05,179 --> 00:15:07,580
Now, daddy, I'm not
your little girl anymore.
336
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:10,883
Good, then that will be
$475 for the shots.
337
00:15:10,918 --> 00:15:14,520
Oh, daddy I love you so much.
338
00:15:14,555 --> 00:15:17,256
And I promise, rain, shine,
famine, or pestilence,
339
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,392
I will write you every day.
340
00:15:19,427 --> 00:15:22,795
Oh, god, this is so exciting.
I am so lucky.
341
00:15:22,830 --> 00:15:23,941
I mean, who would
have ever thought
342
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:27,641
I would get to see
pestilence firsthand?
343
00:15:28,503 --> 00:15:30,770
Oh, I'm gonna miss you so much.
344
00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:32,494
What am I gonna do without you?
345
00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:36,768
I wonder if my hair will turn
back to its original color?
346
00:15:37,612 --> 00:15:40,323
Ah, you're such...
Don't... don't cry, Carol.
347
00:15:40,346 --> 00:15:43,146
Carol, you don't leave
for two days.
348
00:15:43,182 --> 00:15:44,182
Daddy, it's not that.
349
00:15:44,216 --> 00:15:45,315
You're squeezing my arm.
350
00:15:45,351 --> 00:15:47,164
Oh, I'm sorry.
351
00:15:50,189 --> 00:15:51,688
Laverne.
352
00:15:51,724 --> 00:15:53,524
Laverne, what's keeping you?
353
00:15:57,363 --> 00:15:58,780
Laverne?
354
00:16:02,868 --> 00:16:04,016
Hi.
355
00:16:05,738 --> 00:16:08,238
That's it, Laverne.
No more discussion.
356
00:16:08,274 --> 00:16:10,040
I'm driving you home right now.
357
00:16:10,075 --> 00:16:11,808
Well, that's easier said
than done.
358
00:16:11,844 --> 00:16:14,768
My butt's stuck
in a puddle of cough syrup.
359
00:16:21,854 --> 00:16:22,953
Hey, aunt Susan.
360
00:16:22,988 --> 00:16:24,649
Oh, hi, sweetheart.
361
00:16:25,190 --> 00:16:27,093
Oh, I can't believe
you're all grown up,
362
00:16:27,132 --> 00:16:29,067
and you are a police officer.
363
00:16:29,094 --> 00:16:31,816
Yeah. I usually work undercover.
364
00:16:34,967 --> 00:16:37,000
You know, in many societies,
365
00:16:37,036 --> 00:16:39,636
prostitution
is not only tolerated,
366
00:16:39,672 --> 00:16:41,872
it's thought of
as an honorable profession.
367
00:16:41,907 --> 00:16:43,640
Oh, no.
I'm not going to work now.
368
00:16:43,676 --> 00:16:46,871
I'm going to meet
a friend for a drink.
369
00:16:51,150 --> 00:16:53,115
Oh. Oh.
370
00:16:57,773 --> 00:16:59,467
You know, it is a little
chilly out tonight.
371
00:16:59,491 --> 00:17:01,537
I think I will change.
372
00:17:02,210 --> 00:17:03,794
I thought you weren't
working tonight.
373
00:17:03,829 --> 00:17:05,211
Shut up!
374
00:17:10,102 --> 00:17:12,369
I have had
the most traumatic day.
375
00:17:12,404 --> 00:17:13,515
I've been to
four banana republics,
376
00:17:13,539 --> 00:17:16,015
not one of them
has a pith helmet.
377
00:17:16,981 --> 00:17:19,810
Well, I have a spare one.
It was marlin perkin's.
378
00:17:19,845 --> 00:17:20,978
We spent an evening together
379
00:17:21,013 --> 00:17:23,480
while Jim was off
wrestling a croc.
380
00:17:24,847 --> 00:17:27,982
I am so glad you're here,
aunt Susan.
381
00:17:28,017 --> 00:17:31,085
You know, after mom died,
I felt so lost.
382
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,787
I guess I just missed
talking to her most of all.
383
00:17:33,823 --> 00:17:35,501
I can't tell you
how much I'm looking forward
384
00:17:35,525 --> 00:17:36,674
to this time with you.
385
00:17:36,706 --> 00:17:37,843
Right. Right.
386
00:17:37,877 --> 00:17:40,794
Well, first... first, we've got
that food airlift to Kenya,
387
00:17:40,830 --> 00:17:43,664
and then it's off to distribute
powdered milk to Tanzania.
388
00:17:43,699 --> 00:17:44,865
And while the two of us
389
00:17:44,901 --> 00:17:46,501
are trudging
the plains of the serengeti,
390
00:17:46,536 --> 00:17:49,236
we'll finally get a chance
to get to know each other.
391
00:17:49,272 --> 00:17:51,539
You know, Carol,
we're going to be working
392
00:17:51,574 --> 00:17:54,241
so hard and so many long hours,
393
00:17:54,277 --> 00:17:56,744
we're not going to have
much time for all that.
394
00:17:56,779 --> 00:17:57,890
Well, we'll make the time.
395
00:17:57,914 --> 00:18:00,881
I mean, this trip
is not about us bonding.
396
00:18:00,917 --> 00:18:03,603
It's about us helping people.
397
00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:06,278
Well, why can't it be
about both?
398
00:18:08,424 --> 00:18:10,691
Why did you ask me
on this trip, aunt Susan?
399
00:18:10,726 --> 00:18:13,227
Because I need
someone like you to help me.
400
00:18:13,262 --> 00:18:15,362
Someone like me, or me?
401
00:18:16,151 --> 00:18:18,666
Come on, Carol.
402
00:18:18,701 --> 00:18:20,734
Let's, you know, just drop it.
403
00:18:20,770 --> 00:18:22,403
No, I don't want to drop it.
404
00:18:22,438 --> 00:18:24,405
What is it you want from me?
405
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:27,575
Well, guess I want to know
that I'm not just a hired hand.
406
00:18:27,610 --> 00:18:29,243
I'm your family, and I love you.
407
00:18:29,278 --> 00:18:30,477
Don't you love me?
408
00:18:30,513 --> 00:18:32,546
Or, are you just
not able to show it?
409
00:18:32,582 --> 00:18:35,516
Carol, I've spent my life
showing my love for people...
410
00:18:35,551 --> 00:18:38,752
I know. Thousands of people,
and that's great.
411
00:18:38,788 --> 00:18:40,465
But, when it comes down
to loving just one,
412
00:18:40,489 --> 00:18:42,656
I think it scares
the hell out of you.
413
00:18:43,238 --> 00:18:45,392
Well, I was wrong.
I was wrong about you.
414
00:18:45,428 --> 00:18:47,962
You're not like me at all.
415
00:18:47,997 --> 00:18:49,661
You're just like your mother.
416
00:18:51,634 --> 00:18:54,621
And
I miss your mother very much.
417
00:18:59,175 --> 00:19:01,575
Oh, god. She makes everyone cry.
418
00:19:05,114 --> 00:19:07,197
Good morning, aunt Susan.
419
00:19:08,979 --> 00:19:10,267
Aunt Susan?
420
00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:18,256
Morning, baby.
421
00:19:18,288 --> 00:19:20,551
No breakfast for me,
I got to break in a temp nurse.
422
00:19:20,763 --> 00:19:22,045
What's the matter?
423
00:19:22,865 --> 00:19:24,439
"My dearest Carol,
424
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:27,130
"urgent matters
have called me away.
425
00:19:27,603 --> 00:19:30,337
"There was truly no time
for long good-byes.
426
00:19:30,825 --> 00:19:32,832
"We'll have to postpone
our work in Kenya
427
00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:34,268
"for the time being.
428
00:19:35,211 --> 00:19:38,504
"Tell Harry and Barbara
I appreciate their hospitality.
429
00:19:39,015 --> 00:19:41,315
"I hope this check
will find its way
430
00:19:41,350 --> 00:19:44,718
"to good use for your
Miami food exchange.
431
00:19:45,054 --> 00:19:48,210
I'll be in touch.
Love, aunt Susan."
432
00:19:51,027 --> 00:19:53,390
Well, $5,000.
433
00:19:53,996 --> 00:19:55,725
She freaked out.
434
00:19:56,532 --> 00:19:58,132
I thought I got to her
last night.
435
00:19:58,167 --> 00:20:00,146
I thought I turned her around.
436
00:20:00,603 --> 00:20:03,303
Honey, you can't
turn a lifetime around
437
00:20:03,339 --> 00:20:04,722
in one night.
438
00:20:04,974 --> 00:20:08,228
The way your aunt lives,
that's the way she wants it.
439
00:20:08,811 --> 00:20:11,640
I wanted so much
for her to love me.
440
00:20:12,181 --> 00:20:14,214
Baby, she does love you.
441
00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:15,783
As much as
she could love anybody.
442
00:20:15,818 --> 00:20:16,980
Maybe more.
443
00:20:17,729 --> 00:20:19,973
It just seems so sad.
444
00:20:20,265 --> 00:20:22,184
Yeah, in a way, it is.
445
00:20:22,867 --> 00:20:25,749
I am so sorry about your plans.
446
00:20:25,937 --> 00:20:28,263
I know how disappointed
you must be.
447
00:20:29,207 --> 00:20:31,062
Anything I can do for you?
448
00:20:32,077 --> 00:20:34,159
Just tell me that you love me.
449
00:20:35,013 --> 00:20:37,246
- I love you.
- Oh, I love you too, daddy.
450
00:20:37,282 --> 00:20:38,481
I love my baby.
451
00:20:38,516 --> 00:20:41,517
- Oh.
- Oh, god!
452
00:20:41,553 --> 00:20:42,979
She's staying.
453
00:20:45,657 --> 00:20:47,223
Are you Dr. Weston?
454
00:20:47,258 --> 00:20:48,536
Yes.
You must be from the agency.
455
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,660
We have a slight problem.
456
00:20:50,695 --> 00:20:52,242
Morning, doctor.
457
00:20:55,834 --> 00:20:57,800
- Laverne?
- No, it's Willard Scott.
458
00:20:57,836 --> 00:20:59,446
Of course, it's me.
459
00:21:00,238 --> 00:21:02,138
Laverne, what did you...
How did you...
460
00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:05,108
well, let's just say I was up
till 5:30 this morning,
461
00:21:05,143 --> 00:21:08,723
and I owe Jeff over at
the cable company a big favor.
462
00:21:09,314 --> 00:21:11,280
And I wasn't about to let you
stand in the way
463
00:21:11,316 --> 00:21:13,249
of the higby record.
464
00:21:13,284 --> 00:21:14,817
Now, first of all, you're late.
465
00:21:14,853 --> 00:21:16,286
And second of all, this...
466
00:21:16,454 --> 00:21:20,609
Nurse hadn't done dag-gum thing
I told her to do.
467
00:21:21,826 --> 00:21:24,394
Let me warn you
I had physically removed
468
00:21:24,429 --> 00:21:27,430
the on/off switch
from the monitor.
469
00:21:28,933 --> 00:21:31,634
And I've exposed a few
bare wires near the plug
470
00:21:31,670 --> 00:21:34,791
should anyone try to
disrupt this transmission.
471
00:21:35,607 --> 00:21:37,758
Boy, she's scary.
472
00:21:38,643 --> 00:21:40,664
You're damn straight, missy.
473
00:21:42,247 --> 00:21:44,714
Now, first of all, you got
the rosenthal boy at 8:30.
474
00:21:44,749 --> 00:21:47,795
His mama's worried 'cause
he swallowed the head of a mop.
475
00:21:48,887 --> 00:21:50,820
Hey. Who turned the lights off?
476
00:21:50,855 --> 00:21:53,274
What's a-goin' on? Hey!
477
00:21:53,925 --> 00:21:55,505
Life is good.
478
00:21:56,127 --> 00:21:57,560
Hey? Hey?
479
00:21:57,595 --> 00:21:59,416
What are you doing?
480
00:22:20,827 --> 00:22:22,831
What you lookin' at, boy?
481
00:22:25,198 --> 00:22:28,076
This is a place of business,
not a saloon.
482
00:22:29,202 --> 00:22:30,782
Give me the bottle.
483
00:22:33,206 --> 00:22:35,168
I said, now!
484
00:22:50,524 --> 00:22:53,892
She's baaack.
485
00:22:53,942 --> 00:22:58,492
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