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1
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2
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Ugh!
3
00:00:04,594 --> 00:00:06,227
This Thanksgiving is gonna be the worst!
4
00:00:06,296 --> 00:00:07,296
You don't know that.
5
00:00:07,364 --> 00:00:09,230
The years my dad comes are great,
6
00:00:09,299 --> 00:00:11,232
and my mom years are disasters.
7
00:00:11,301 --> 00:00:13,167
You should really try to appreciate
the time you have with your mom.
8
00:00:13,236 --> 00:00:14,902
Spoken like a man who drove his mother
9
00:00:14,971 --> 00:00:16,604
all the way to Oregon and enjoyed it.
10
00:00:16,673 --> 00:00:18,139
Well, our book club had just ended,
11
00:00:18,208 --> 00:00:19,474
and the last three books were
set in the Pacific Northwest.
12
00:00:19,542 --> 00:00:20,475
It just made sense.
13
00:00:20,543 --> 00:00:21,543
[Groans]
14
00:00:21,611 --> 00:00:23,344
I just want a peaceful Thanksgiving.
15
00:00:23,413 --> 00:00:25,313
I have nothing to be thankful for!
16
00:00:25,382 --> 00:00:27,582
Your three beautiful children
are right here.
17
00:00:29,352 --> 00:00:32,220
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
18
00:00:34,391 --> 00:00:36,451
Katie: Called to school by Dr. Ellie...
19
00:00:36,476 --> 00:00:38,926
great Special Ed teacher,
terrible necklace-chooser.
20
00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,428
Anna-Kat's behavior has been
21
00:00:40,497 --> 00:00:42,563
a little heightened lately.
22
00:00:42,632 --> 00:00:45,833
She organized the
stuffed animals by fur color.
23
00:00:47,270 --> 00:00:48,469
Looks a little race-war-y.
24
00:00:48,538 --> 00:00:50,638
Is anything going on at home?
25
00:00:50,707 --> 00:00:51,773
Any changes?
26
00:00:51,841 --> 00:00:54,575
Well, her favorite toy pony, Frenchie...
27
00:00:54,644 --> 00:00:56,944
Oh, I know about Frenchie's leg. Mm.
28
00:00:57,013 --> 00:00:59,280
Anything else out of the ordinary?
29
00:00:59,349 --> 00:01:02,183
Uh, the holidays
can be stressful for parents,
30
00:01:02,252 --> 00:01:05,119
and sensitive kids can pick up on that.
31
00:01:05,188 --> 00:01:07,355
My mother.
32
00:01:07,424 --> 00:01:08,790
She's coming for Thanksgiving.
33
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Ahh.
34
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I-Is that complicated for you?
35
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No. It's pretty simple.
36
00:01:13,363 --> 00:01:14,595
She's the worst.
37
00:01:14,664 --> 00:01:17,198
My mom's the biggest narcissist
on the planet.
38
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She was a Pan Am stewardess
39
00:01:18,401 --> 00:01:19,867
back in the day when it meant something.
40
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But was she there for me growing up? No.
41
00:01:22,605 --> 00:01:24,038
She traveled around the world.
42
00:01:24,107 --> 00:01:25,373
Well, Anna-Kat is...
43
00:01:25,442 --> 00:01:27,075
Did she come to
one of my basketball games?
44
00:01:27,143 --> 00:01:28,276
No.
45
00:01:28,344 --> 00:01:30,478
Was she at my back-to-school night? No.
46
00:01:30,547 --> 00:01:33,748
Did she ever check out
my break-dancing crew?
47
00:01:33,817 --> 00:01:34,949
Never!
48
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All she does is come around
and expect everybody
49
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to fawn all over her and listen
to her talk about herself.
50
00:01:41,257 --> 00:01:43,324
Unh-unh. Not in my house.
51
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She was not there for me,
and I am not gonna...
52
00:01:46,796 --> 00:01:49,130
Do you... Do you have a pillow?
53
00:01:49,199 --> 00:01:51,399
We're actually here
to talk about Anna-Kat.
54
00:01:51,468 --> 00:01:54,969
And right now, she is
feeding off of your anxiety.
55
00:01:55,038 --> 00:01:58,606
Uh, I wondered if you'd given
any more thought
56
00:01:58,675 --> 00:02:00,374
to putting her on medication.
57
00:02:00,443 --> 00:02:02,977
Dr. Ellie, you know
where I stand with this.
58
00:02:03,046 --> 00:02:04,312
She is 6 years old.
59
00:02:04,380 --> 00:02:05,747
I don't think screwing around
with her brain this young
60
00:02:05,815 --> 00:02:07,482
is a good idea.
61
00:02:07,550 --> 00:02:08,816
We'll revisit this
62
00:02:08,885 --> 00:02:11,819
if I find a bag of cat heads
in her backpack.
63
00:02:13,490 --> 00:02:16,424
Dr. Ellie says Anna-Kat
is feeding off my anxiety.
64
00:02:16,493 --> 00:02:18,226
She brought up the medication again.
65
00:02:18,294 --> 00:02:20,027
I like how she's not afraid of you.
66
00:02:20,096 --> 00:02:23,464
So, instead, she taught me
a few coping techniques for her.
67
00:02:23,533 --> 00:02:25,199
She can either squeeze a stress ball
68
00:02:25,268 --> 00:02:26,534
or sing a song in her head.
69
00:02:26,603 --> 00:02:28,436
But I don't want to open
the door to "Frozen" again,
70
00:02:28,505 --> 00:02:30,305
- so I just gave her the ball.
- Here's an idea...
71
00:02:30,340 --> 00:02:31,820
don't let your mother stress you out.
72
00:02:31,875 --> 00:02:33,708
This is not me. This is all her.
73
00:02:33,777 --> 00:02:35,376
No matter what the occasion,
74
00:02:35,445 --> 00:02:37,512
the attention always has to be on her.
75
00:02:37,580 --> 00:02:40,081
Silent Night
76
00:02:40,150 --> 00:02:43,451
Holy night
77
00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:46,320
Both:
All is calm
78
00:02:46,389 --> 00:02:49,290
All is bright
79
00:02:49,359 --> 00:02:53,227
Round yon virgin
80
00:02:53,296 --> 00:02:56,264
Mother and child
81
00:02:56,332 --> 00:03:00,668
Holy infant, so tender and...
82
00:03:02,272 --> 00:03:04,872
Oh, open mine first.
83
00:03:09,212 --> 00:03:11,813
Oh! Wasn't I fabulous?
84
00:03:11,881 --> 00:03:13,681
That was me in my prime.
85
00:03:13,750 --> 00:03:15,550
But no reason to be jealous!
86
00:03:15,618 --> 00:03:17,919
I have one for each of you.
87
00:03:17,987 --> 00:03:19,854
All right. You're welcome.
88
00:03:21,057 --> 00:03:22,057
Ow!
89
00:03:22,125 --> 00:03:24,192
It hurts so much!
90
00:03:24,260 --> 00:03:26,694
Every time I bend my elbow,
91
00:03:26,763 --> 00:03:28,163
it makes this weird clicking noise.
92
00:03:28,198 --> 00:03:30,031
Is... Is that something
I should be worried about?
93
00:03:30,099 --> 00:03:31,099
Can you hear it?
94
00:03:32,235 --> 00:03:33,501
All that may be true,
95
00:03:33,570 --> 00:03:35,937
but maybe the bigger problem
is how you react.
96
00:03:36,005 --> 00:03:39,407
Sleep in heavenly pe...
97
00:03:39,475 --> 00:03:41,542
Sit down!
98
00:03:41,611 --> 00:03:43,644
Jesus does not want you
singing about him!
99
00:03:43,713 --> 00:03:47,014
No... body... wants... these!
100
00:03:47,083 --> 00:03:48,349
Get this thing out!
101
00:03:48,418 --> 00:03:49,851
It's not quite time to push.
102
00:03:49,919 --> 00:03:52,720
I mean my mother!
103
00:03:52,789 --> 00:03:56,757
Greg, she forced you
to walk her to her car.
104
00:03:56,826 --> 00:03:58,306
You missed the birth of our firstborn.
105
00:03:58,361 --> 00:04:00,663
I did, but I saw the sheets. I'm good.
106
00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,085
All that wouldn't have happened if you
didn't let her get under your skin.
107
00:04:03,172 --> 00:04:04,932
You're right. She's driving me crazy.
108
00:04:05,001 --> 00:04:06,734
And I'm driving Anna-Kat crazy.
109
00:04:06,803 --> 00:04:08,936
Next thing you know, we've got
a backpack full of cat heads.
110
00:04:09,005 --> 00:04:10,338
- What?
- It's a medical term.
111
00:04:10,406 --> 00:04:11,939
No matter what my mother does,
112
00:04:12,008 --> 00:04:13,965
I'm going to ignore her and stay calm.
113
00:04:13,990 --> 00:04:16,344
Or you can sit down and
finally tell her how you feel.
114
00:04:16,412 --> 00:04:17,612
God, no.
115
00:04:17,637 --> 00:04:19,437
I'm saving that stuff
to say to her coffin.
116
00:04:21,818 --> 00:04:24,085
Angela, I really need you
for Thanksgiving
117
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to be a buffer for my mom.
118
00:04:25,722 --> 00:04:27,488
Mnh-mnh. Too late.
I'm already Doris' buffer.
119
00:04:27,557 --> 00:04:28,689
[Sighs] Doris: Ugh.
120
00:04:28,758 --> 00:04:29,881
My parents are so grateful
121
00:04:29,906 --> 00:04:31,695
for all the money I give them
on Thanksgiving.
122
00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:34,195
- It's disgusting.
- I really need a buffer!
123
00:04:34,264 --> 00:04:35,196
Hi, everybody!
124
00:04:35,265 --> 00:04:37,131
- Both: Hey.
- Hi, Viv.
125
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:38,466
[Gasps] Oh, my gosh!
126
00:04:38,534 --> 00:04:40,101
That cheeseburger is huge.
127
00:04:40,169 --> 00:04:41,702
It's just the size that it comes as.
128
00:04:41,771 --> 00:04:44,238
It's enormous.
129
00:04:44,307 --> 00:04:46,007
It's a normal-sized cheeseburger, Viv.
130
00:04:46,075 --> 00:04:47,315
[Chuckles] I love cheeseburgers.
131
00:04:47,377 --> 00:04:48,542
I eat them all the time.
132
00:04:48,611 --> 00:04:50,144
[Chuckles] Sure you do.
133
00:04:50,213 --> 00:04:51,612
Yeah, we completely believe
134
00:04:51,681 --> 00:04:53,614
that you eat cheeseburgers all the time.
135
00:04:53,683 --> 00:04:55,583
Look at me! I'm taking a bite!
136
00:04:55,652 --> 00:04:57,318
That's my food.
137
00:04:57,387 --> 00:04:59,430
- Mmm! So good.
- Okay.
138
00:04:59,455 --> 00:05:02,828
So, um, are you guys gonna be
home or away for Thanksgiving?
139
00:05:02,853 --> 00:05:03,824
Home.
140
00:05:03,849 --> 00:05:06,469
Allen is gonna be in the city
with the boys and his ex-wife.
141
00:05:06,494 --> 00:05:08,696
They still do holidays
and vacations together.
142
00:05:08,765 --> 00:05:11,281
- Don't you go, too?
- Mnh-mnh. His ex-wife hates me.
143
00:05:11,401 --> 00:05:14,023
- Mm.
- Hates me. Hates me.
144
00:05:14,219 --> 00:05:15,770
She thinks I stole her husband.
145
00:05:15,838 --> 00:05:17,405
Which I kind of did.
146
00:05:17,473 --> 00:05:18,973
But not on purpose.
147
00:05:19,042 --> 00:05:21,342
You realize that's not a good
story to tell people, right?
148
00:05:21,411 --> 00:05:22,411
I know!
149
00:05:22,478 --> 00:05:24,679
So, I'm gonna be all alone.
150
00:05:24,747 --> 00:05:26,647
- Mm.
- By myself.
151
00:05:26,716 --> 00:05:28,616
- Yeah.
- On Thanksgiving.
152
00:05:30,019 --> 00:05:31,285
This coming Thursday.
153
00:05:33,423 --> 00:05:35,856
Well, enjoy the peace and quiet.
154
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,726
I will!
155
00:05:38,795 --> 00:05:40,394
Okay! [Laughs]
156
00:05:40,463 --> 00:05:41,862
- Bye!
- Bye.
157
00:05:41,931 --> 00:05:44,131
No way. My mom will already be
on my last nerve.
158
00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:45,833
I don't want Viv getting on nerves
159
00:05:45,902 --> 00:05:47,201
I haven't even discovered yet.
160
00:05:47,270 --> 00:05:48,769
Taylor: Touchdown!
161
00:05:48,838 --> 00:05:51,179
That's another 5 bucks you owe me.
162
00:05:51,249 --> 00:05:52,835
Guys, this is
my teaching assistant, Vali.
163
00:05:52,890 --> 00:05:54,175
Vali, these are my kids...
164
00:05:54,243 --> 00:05:55,676
Oliver, Taylor, and Anna-Kat.
165
00:05:55,745 --> 00:05:57,411
The boy seems shorter than I imagined.
166
00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:58,480
TV off, guys.
167
00:05:58,548 --> 00:05:59,580
But we have a bet on the game.
168
00:05:59,649 --> 00:06:01,215
Thanksgiving isn't about football.
169
00:06:01,284 --> 00:06:02,616
It pretty much is.
170
00:06:02,685 --> 00:06:04,885
It's only not when you have
a dad who isn't into sports.
171
00:06:04,921 --> 00:06:06,087
I'm into sports!
172
00:06:06,155 --> 00:06:08,022
Name three NFL quarterbacks.
173
00:06:09,625 --> 00:06:11,792
I don't have to prove
anything to you. TV off.
174
00:06:11,861 --> 00:06:13,928
[Scoffs] Greg!
175
00:06:17,033 --> 00:06:18,280
You're killing me!
176
00:06:18,358 --> 00:06:20,483
Why do you always invite
one of your TAs?
177
00:06:20,554 --> 00:06:22,921
You mean invite someone from a
foreign land with nowhere to go
178
00:06:22,968 --> 00:06:24,638
to join us on a day
when we open our hearts?
179
00:06:24,707 --> 00:06:26,907
The last thing that I need...
180
00:06:26,976 --> 00:06:28,142
Hi!
181
00:06:28,211 --> 00:06:32,046
We are so happy that you are with us.
182
00:06:32,115 --> 00:06:33,414
I like your track suit.
183
00:06:33,483 --> 00:06:36,484
I must say, you are very beautiful.
184
00:06:36,552 --> 00:06:38,019
I like your size.
185
00:06:41,391 --> 00:06:43,090
Okay, that was creepy.
186
00:06:43,159 --> 00:06:45,259
It's no less creepy
than you hitting on my mom.
187
00:06:45,328 --> 00:06:46,694
I do not hit on your mom.
188
00:06:46,763 --> 00:06:48,195
You always kiss her on the cheek
189
00:06:48,264 --> 00:06:49,563
and try to make her like you.
190
00:06:49,632 --> 00:06:51,158
You're like, [High-pitched voice]
"Oh, that dress
191
00:06:51,221 --> 00:06:53,100
is just perfect for the season!"
192
00:06:53,169 --> 00:06:55,440
Why does your voice always get higher
when you do an impression of me?
193
00:06:55,465 --> 00:06:56,486
- [Doorbell rings]
- [Gasps]
194
00:06:56,511 --> 00:06:58,939
[Normal voice]
That's her. My heart is racing.
195
00:06:59,008 --> 00:07:00,474
[Sighs] I need that stress ball.
196
00:07:00,543 --> 00:07:01,876
You can do this.
197
00:07:01,944 --> 00:07:03,744
- [Sighs]
- Stay calm.
198
00:07:03,813 --> 00:07:05,079
Don't let her get to you.
199
00:07:05,148 --> 00:07:08,149
Do it for Anna-Kat. Do it for me.
200
00:07:08,217 --> 00:07:10,151
Okay, I can see I lost you.
Do it for Anna-Kat.
201
00:07:10,219 --> 00:07:13,454
Okay.
202
00:07:13,523 --> 00:07:14,989
[Dramatic music plays]
203
00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:18,759
Relax.
204
00:07:18,828 --> 00:07:22,997
There's no way she can make an entire
family Thanksgiving about herself.
205
00:07:23,066 --> 00:07:24,965
[Exhales deeply]
206
00:07:26,307 --> 00:07:28,235
Oh, God. She upped her game.
207
00:07:28,304 --> 00:07:29,869
Happy Thanksgiving.
208
00:07:42,084 --> 00:07:44,416
I'll just take this heavy
bag upstairs, then.
209
00:07:44,485 --> 00:07:45,608
[Chuckles]
210
00:07:45,702 --> 00:07:48,288
- All by myself.
- Okay, great.
211
00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:50,474
Be careful of that clicky elbow.
212
00:07:50,499 --> 00:07:51,457
[Suitcase clattering]
213
00:07:51,525 --> 00:07:53,425
What happened to your mom?
214
00:07:53,494 --> 00:07:56,092
Absolutely nothing.
215
00:07:56,163 --> 00:07:57,496
She is looking for attention.
216
00:07:57,565 --> 00:08:00,332
You didn't ask?
She could be really hurt.
217
00:08:00,401 --> 00:08:01,467
Oh, please.
218
00:08:01,535 --> 00:08:03,068
That thing isn't even
bolted into her head.
219
00:08:03,137 --> 00:08:04,803
- I should go help her.
- No!
220
00:08:04,872 --> 00:08:06,638
You will be playing right into her hand.
221
00:08:06,707 --> 00:08:07,918
I'm a good person!
222
00:08:07,943 --> 00:08:09,641
You knew what you were getting
into when you married me.
223
00:08:09,710 --> 00:08:10,909
Okay, but no crawling up her butt.
224
00:08:10,978 --> 00:08:13,958
No, like, [High-pitched voice] "Oh,
we're just so happy you're here!"
225
00:08:13,983 --> 00:08:16,448
- I don't sound like that.
- Taylor: Dad, did you say something?
226
00:08:17,485 --> 00:08:19,151
All right.
227
00:08:21,428 --> 00:08:23,629
So. How was your trip?
228
00:08:23,654 --> 00:08:26,186
Not easy, as you can imagine.
229
00:08:27,311 --> 00:08:30,362
Anna-Kat and I saw a video of
this guy going through security
230
00:08:30,431 --> 00:08:34,066
who was caught smuggling
a monkey in his underpants.
231
00:08:34,135 --> 00:08:37,102
It was supposed to be sedated,
but it was awake.
232
00:08:37,171 --> 00:08:39,184
- And very angry.
- Mm.
233
00:08:39,874 --> 00:08:42,007
Well, uh, we're happy you're here.
234
00:08:44,478 --> 00:08:45,911
I... [Stammering]
235
00:08:45,980 --> 00:08:48,313
Check on the, uh, Thanksgiving.
236
00:08:53,854 --> 00:08:56,021
Just leave it.
237
00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,591
Grandma is known for pretending,
238
00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:01,660
so even though she looks hurt,
239
00:09:01,729 --> 00:09:04,663
remember the important thing
is that she's not hurt.
240
00:09:04,732 --> 00:09:07,032
So no one talk about the
monkey bars on Grandma's head.
241
00:09:07,101 --> 00:09:09,168
I love watching your mouth move.
242
00:09:09,236 --> 00:09:10,702
Dude.
243
00:09:11,972 --> 00:09:15,774
Anna-Kat, you don't need
to squeeze your stress ball.
244
00:09:15,843 --> 00:09:16,942
Mom is fine.
245
00:09:17,011 --> 00:09:19,278
We are like E.T. and Elliott.
246
00:09:19,346 --> 00:09:21,547
Whatever happens to one
happens to the other.
247
00:09:21,615 --> 00:09:23,615
Oh! You're like me.
248
00:09:23,684 --> 00:09:25,350
So you get a weird feeling in your tummy
249
00:09:25,419 --> 00:09:28,253
whenever you see a mommy
that's taller than a daddy.
250
00:09:28,322 --> 00:09:30,255
Totally.
251
00:09:30,324 --> 00:09:32,524
Can I steal you for a sec?
252
00:09:32,593 --> 00:09:34,460
253
00:09:34,528 --> 00:09:35,761
I, uh...
254
00:09:35,830 --> 00:09:38,464
inadvertently lip-kissed your mom.
255
00:09:38,532 --> 00:09:39,965
Greg.
256
00:09:40,034 --> 00:09:41,066
I didn't enjoy it!
257
00:09:41,135 --> 00:09:42,534
Why do you even have to say that?
258
00:09:42,603 --> 00:09:43,618
[Laughs]
259
00:09:43,643 --> 00:09:46,091
There's no way everyone's
staying quiet about Grandma.
260
00:09:46,140 --> 00:09:47,172
You don't think so?
261
00:09:47,241 --> 00:09:48,907
Care to make it more interesting?
262
00:09:48,976 --> 00:09:50,976
I'll bet on it. It's on!
263
00:09:52,146 --> 00:09:53,846
When have I ever high-fived?
264
00:09:53,914 --> 00:09:55,347
265
00:09:55,416 --> 00:09:57,015
You know, when I was a stewardess,
266
00:09:57,084 --> 00:09:59,885
before every flight,
I had to get on the scale.
267
00:09:59,954 --> 00:10:03,122
And if you weighed over 118,
they put you on diet pills
268
00:10:03,190 --> 00:10:04,923
and only let you fly
out of Jersey and Detroit.
269
00:10:04,992 --> 00:10:07,259
That's terrible.
270
00:10:07,328 --> 00:10:08,827
No, no, no.
It kept me looking fantastic.
271
00:10:08,896 --> 00:10:10,195
Mom! That's degrading.
272
00:10:11,265 --> 00:10:13,198
Mama, where's my stress ball?
273
00:10:13,267 --> 00:10:14,366
Oh.
274
00:10:14,435 --> 00:10:16,301
Honey, we'll find it.
275
00:10:16,370 --> 00:10:17,836
And I feel ya.
276
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,406
What, so now she's using a stress ball?
277
00:10:21,475 --> 00:10:22,708
When the need arises.
278
00:10:25,102 --> 00:10:26,535
Knock, knock!
279
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:27,913
Happy Thanksgiving!
280
00:10:27,982 --> 00:10:30,480
- Viv?
- So fun!
281
00:10:30,505 --> 00:10:32,818
Greg saw me through the window
and waved me in!
282
00:10:32,886 --> 00:10:34,319
Hi, everybody!
283
00:10:34,388 --> 00:10:35,854
[Gasps]
284
00:10:35,923 --> 00:10:38,457
Look at your table!
285
00:10:38,525 --> 00:10:39,925
Yeah.
286
00:10:39,994 --> 00:10:41,426
Oh! Wow. Are...
287
00:10:41,495 --> 00:10:43,962
Are these... from the street?
288
00:10:44,031 --> 00:10:45,664
- [Sighs]
- You know what?
289
00:10:45,733 --> 00:10:47,099
You're lucky I'm here.
290
00:10:47,167 --> 00:10:49,534
I'm gonna let you use
my fall tablescape.
291
00:10:49,603 --> 00:10:51,270
There's nothing wrong
with my table, Viv.
292
00:10:51,338 --> 00:10:52,604
[Laughs]
293
00:10:52,673 --> 00:10:54,606
You are so funny!
294
00:10:54,675 --> 00:10:57,009
[Laughs] Greg!
295
00:10:57,034 --> 00:10:58,343
[Gasps]
296
00:10:58,412 --> 00:11:00,379
Hi. I'm Viv.
297
00:11:00,447 --> 00:11:01,980
It's so nice to meet you.
298
00:11:02,049 --> 00:11:03,882
You're too bony for me.
299
00:11:03,951 --> 00:11:06,233
I didn't think that you could do anything
worse than making out with my mom,
300
00:11:06,295 --> 00:11:07,853
but congratulations. You topped it!
301
00:11:07,888 --> 00:11:09,321
Well, she was desperately
peering through the window.
302
00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:10,489
What was I supposed to do?
303
00:11:10,558 --> 00:11:12,257
The same thing that you do
if someone asks
304
00:11:12,326 --> 00:11:14,393
if you have a minute
to save the environment...
305
00:11:14,461 --> 00:11:16,795
You look at your shoes
and you keep moving.
306
00:11:16,864 --> 00:11:18,363
Darling, you are stunning.
307
00:11:18,432 --> 00:11:19,898
Oh, those stems!
308
00:11:19,967 --> 00:11:21,366
Tell me... Were you ever a stewardess?
309
00:11:21,435 --> 00:11:24,070
Why, no, but thank you. I'm Viv!
310
00:11:24,138 --> 00:11:25,971
I'm Kathryn, Katie's mother.
311
00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:27,272
[Gasps]
312
00:11:27,341 --> 00:11:28,473
Kathryn, forgive me.
313
00:11:28,542 --> 00:11:29,835
I'm sure you've been
talking about this all day,
314
00:11:29,860 --> 00:11:32,110
but I have to ask...
What happened to you?
315
00:11:32,179 --> 00:11:34,112
No-o-o-o-o!
316
00:11:34,181 --> 00:11:35,741
Pay up, girl!
317
00:11:35,889 --> 00:11:38,016
Mom says you're not allowed
to call me that.
318
00:11:38,085 --> 00:11:40,586
Well, it all started three weeks ago
319
00:11:40,654 --> 00:11:44,089
when I got into a small
but very severe car accident.
320
00:11:44,158 --> 00:11:46,280
- Oh, my gosh.
- What's the other thing
321
00:11:46,351 --> 00:11:48,393
Dr. Ellie told Anna-Kat to do
to stay calm?
322
00:11:48,462 --> 00:11:50,295
Oh, yes! Sing a song in your head!
323
00:11:50,364 --> 00:11:52,831
No! Not that song! Too late!
324
00:11:52,900 --> 00:11:54,466
Don't let them in
325
00:11:54,535 --> 00:11:55,901
Don't let them see
326
00:11:55,970 --> 00:12:00,105
Be the good girl
you always have to be
327
00:12:00,174 --> 00:12:01,673
...stops. I hit him.
328
00:12:01,742 --> 00:12:03,408
- Oh!
- So I'm driving...
329
00:12:03,477 --> 00:12:07,112
Conceal, don't feel,
don't let them know
330
00:12:07,181 --> 00:12:10,015
But now they know
331
00:12:10,084 --> 00:12:11,483
What are you doing?
332
00:12:11,552 --> 00:12:13,418
We spent three years getting
that song out of this house.
333
00:12:13,487 --> 00:12:14,586
It's spilling out.
334
00:12:14,655 --> 00:12:16,088
Let it go
335
00:12:16,156 --> 00:12:17,022
Let it go
336
00:12:17,091 --> 00:12:18,091
Oh, dear Lord.
337
00:12:18,158 --> 00:12:20,025
Can't hold it back anymore
338
00:12:20,094 --> 00:12:22,005
Honey, you have got to calm down.
339
00:12:22,076 --> 00:12:23,900
Isn't it a good thing
your mom has someone to talk to?
340
00:12:23,931 --> 00:12:25,564
Now we've got
the neediest woman in the world
341
00:12:25,633 --> 00:12:27,933
coming together with the biggest
attention whore in the world,
342
00:12:28,002 --> 00:12:29,635
which is exactly
what I was trying to avoid.
343
00:12:29,703 --> 00:12:31,703
So, no! Not good!
344
00:12:31,772 --> 00:12:34,539
I'm gonna use a word... Selfless.
345
00:12:34,608 --> 00:12:37,509
You didn't want to ruin
their holiday by not showing up.
346
00:12:37,578 --> 00:12:39,411
I don't like to make things about me.
347
00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:41,446
You know, people think of me
as a giving person.
348
00:12:41,515 --> 00:12:42,681
Oh, I can't take it.
349
00:12:42,750 --> 00:12:44,149
I'm blowing the lid off
this web of lies.
350
00:12:44,218 --> 00:12:46,451
I'm gonna "Brady Bunch" her.
351
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:48,920
You know I wasn't allowed
to watch television as a child.
352
00:12:48,989 --> 00:12:52,357
Well, this man blamed Carol for
injuring his neck in a car accident,
353
00:12:52,426 --> 00:12:53,825
and then Mike and the kids
went to court,
354
00:12:53,894 --> 00:12:55,160
and then Mike dropped a briefcase,
355
00:12:55,229 --> 00:12:56,995
which caused the man
with the fake neck brace
356
00:12:57,064 --> 00:12:58,597
to whip his head around,
357
00:12:58,666 --> 00:13:00,899
proving that his neck
wasn't hurt at all.
358
00:13:02,536 --> 00:13:05,037
The whole family went to court
for a traffic accident?
359
00:13:05,105 --> 00:13:06,371
[Sighs]
360
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,492
Kathryn: The doctor was supposed
to be examining my neck,
361
00:13:08,547 --> 00:13:11,410
- but his eyes were journeying.
- It's quite a journey.
362
00:13:11,478 --> 00:13:13,478
Mama, I can't find my ball.
363
00:13:13,547 --> 00:13:15,280
Try to find anything else to squeeze.
364
00:13:15,349 --> 00:13:17,880
Kathryn: You know, I had him
on a flight once to JFK.
365
00:13:17,942 --> 00:13:18,997
Viv: No!
366
00:13:19,067 --> 00:13:20,819
He kept on pressing the help button.
367
00:13:20,888 --> 00:13:23,388
It was supposedly because he
didn't know how to work the...
368
00:13:27,771 --> 00:13:29,003
Damn it!
369
00:13:29,028 --> 00:13:30,094
[Sighs]
370
00:13:30,119 --> 00:13:31,852
I thought you said the "Brady Bunch" man
371
00:13:31,877 --> 00:13:32,774
dropped his briefcase,
372
00:13:32,799 --> 00:13:34,433
not his husband's spaghetti plate!
373
00:13:34,501 --> 00:13:35,434
Mom! You okay?
374
00:13:35,502 --> 00:13:37,202
Oh, she's fine. [Chuckles]
375
00:13:37,271 --> 00:13:38,403
As I was saying...
376
00:13:38,472 --> 00:13:41,868
Let it go, let it go
377
00:13:41,893 --> 00:13:44,936
- [Plastic crinkling]
-
That perfect girl is gone
378
00:13:44,961 --> 00:13:46,175
...was fawning all over me.
379
00:13:46,246 --> 00:13:48,046
- [Crinkling continues]
- Anna-Kat.
380
00:13:48,882 --> 00:13:50,449
Grandma's talking.
381
00:13:50,517 --> 00:13:52,584
Here I stand
382
00:13:52,653 --> 00:13:58,437
In the light of day
383
00:13:58,507 --> 00:14:02,327
-
Let the storm rage o-o-o-on
- [Crinkling continues]
384
00:14:02,396 --> 00:14:04,396
Anna-Kat, please!
385
00:14:04,465 --> 00:14:05,530
Isn't it about time
386
00:14:05,599 --> 00:14:07,499
that somebody put this kid
on medication?
387
00:14:07,568 --> 00:14:09,597
[Gasps] Medication?
388
00:14:09,698 --> 00:14:11,803
You want to put my daughter
on medication
389
00:14:11,872 --> 00:14:14,139
because she interrupted
your stupid story
390
00:14:14,208 --> 00:14:15,674
about a jungle gym on your head?!
391
00:14:15,743 --> 00:14:18,549
That's it! I'm taking it off!
392
00:14:19,213 --> 00:14:21,213
Aah!
393
00:14:21,281 --> 00:14:22,981
Ladies! Please, stop!
394
00:14:23,050 --> 00:14:25,717
Everyone else, there's spinach and
artichoke dip in a bread bowl.
395
00:14:25,786 --> 00:14:27,452
There's something about strong women
396
00:14:27,521 --> 00:14:28,720
that just gets me going.
397
00:14:29,212 --> 00:14:31,992
Again, that's my mother
and my grandmother.
398
00:14:32,017 --> 00:14:33,492
You're a lucky man.
399
00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:34,560
[Groans]
400
00:14:34,628 --> 00:14:36,327
Oh, my God. I cupped your boob.
401
00:14:36,352 --> 00:14:39,097
- Attacked and fondled?
- Didn't fondle.
402
00:14:39,166 --> 00:14:40,465
- Aye!
- [Scoffs]
403
00:14:41,791 --> 00:14:43,078
The dip is delicious.
404
00:14:46,366 --> 00:14:48,499
405
00:14:48,568 --> 00:14:51,197
Hey, Greg. How are you?
406
00:14:51,306 --> 00:14:53,171
How's your holiday going?
407
00:14:53,239 --> 00:14:56,107
Normally, I go upstairs and smooth
things over, but this time, I can't.
408
00:14:56,176 --> 00:14:57,475
Your mother would assume
I was there to bed her.
409
00:14:57,544 --> 00:14:58,843
Well, I'm not going up there.
410
00:14:58,912 --> 00:15:00,745
She was completely out of line
with Anna-Kat.
411
00:15:02,449 --> 00:15:03,948
I agree the timing was way off,
412
00:15:04,017 --> 00:15:05,717
but it really wasn't that terrible.
413
00:15:05,785 --> 00:15:08,019
It's not like Dr. Ellie
hasn't suggested medication
414
00:15:08,088 --> 00:15:09,088
for Anna-Kat before.
415
00:15:09,155 --> 00:15:11,122
I am not willing to go down that road
416
00:15:11,191 --> 00:15:13,591
until we've exhausted
all the other roads.
417
00:15:13,660 --> 00:15:15,026
I totally agree with you,
418
00:15:15,095 --> 00:15:17,495
but it's there for us
if we feel like she needs it.
419
00:15:17,564 --> 00:15:19,263
Because the singing in your head,
420
00:15:19,332 --> 00:15:21,432
from what we've seen today...
not effective.
421
00:15:21,501 --> 00:15:24,635
My mom just wants to drug Anna-Kat
so she doesn't have to deal with her.
422
00:15:24,704 --> 00:15:26,944
The same reason why she wanted
to fly around the world...
423
00:15:27,007 --> 00:15:28,639
so she didn't have to deal with me.
424
00:15:28,708 --> 00:15:30,441
Why are you telling me this?
You should be telling her.
425
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:32,377
Greg! This is coffin talk.
426
00:15:32,445 --> 00:15:33,811
You know, you're critical of your mom,
427
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:35,747
but you're the one who's
thinking of herself right now.
428
00:15:35,815 --> 00:15:36,748
You're acting just like her.
429
00:15:36,816 --> 00:15:38,683
So, this is it, Greg.
430
00:15:38,752 --> 00:15:41,486
This is where your life ends.
431
00:15:41,554 --> 00:15:44,288
Sweetheart, this is your chance
432
00:15:44,357 --> 00:15:46,024
to have a real conversation
with your mother.
433
00:15:46,049 --> 00:15:47,933
[Sighs] Fine.
434
00:15:48,105 --> 00:15:51,062
I've never been able
to get through to her.
435
00:15:51,644 --> 00:15:53,965
At least you know how to touch her.
436
00:15:54,034 --> 00:15:56,401
437
00:15:56,469 --> 00:15:57,602
Hey.
438
00:15:57,670 --> 00:15:59,103
- Everything okay?
- [Sighs]
439
00:15:59,172 --> 00:16:01,372
Oh, my God. So good!
440
00:16:01,441 --> 00:16:03,074
I know it's none of my business...
441
00:16:03,143 --> 00:16:04,509
Here's where you stop talking.
442
00:16:04,577 --> 00:16:06,601
- ...but if you want my opinion...
- I don't.
443
00:16:06,626 --> 00:16:09,467
...medication has done wonders
for my step-kids.
444
00:16:09,522 --> 00:16:11,483
- Viv, I am not gonna...
- I get it.
445
00:16:11,551 --> 00:16:13,889
I had my doubts about it going in, too.
446
00:16:13,951 --> 00:16:15,953
But those kids
were totally out of control,
447
00:16:16,022 --> 00:16:17,955
and once I started taking these,
448
00:16:18,024 --> 00:16:20,124
I found them much easier to handle.
449
00:16:20,193 --> 00:16:23,528
So, these pills help you smile
through the pain?
450
00:16:23,596 --> 00:16:25,897
I feel nothing.
451
00:16:25,965 --> 00:16:28,533
Mm.
452
00:16:30,170 --> 00:16:33,237
So, turns out Anna-Kat
doesn't need drugs...
453
00:16:33,306 --> 00:16:34,306
We do.
454
00:16:38,690 --> 00:16:40,778
Oh, I remember these.
455
00:16:42,292 --> 00:16:43,642
Can we go again?
456
00:16:43,667 --> 00:16:45,650
Sure. I'm happy to take
more of your money.
457
00:16:45,718 --> 00:16:47,118
Gambling's awesome.
458
00:16:47,187 --> 00:16:50,888
I think it's gonna be a problem
for me later in life.
459
00:16:50,957 --> 00:16:52,623
Whoo!
460
00:16:52,692 --> 00:16:53,925
- [Laughs]
- I feel good.
461
00:16:53,993 --> 00:16:55,726
- Me, too.
- Yeah.
462
00:16:55,795 --> 00:16:58,563
Mom, all you do is try to get attention,
463
00:16:58,631 --> 00:17:00,698
and all I do is yell at you.
464
00:17:00,767 --> 00:17:02,800
We have got to figure out a way
to stop that.
465
00:17:02,869 --> 00:17:05,303
- Mm.
- I mean, come on, Mom.
466
00:17:05,371 --> 00:17:07,638
What is with this thing?
467
00:17:07,707 --> 00:17:09,207
Well, it's... it's from my car accident.
468
00:17:09,275 --> 00:17:11,075
I called you about it,
but you never followed up.
469
00:17:11,144 --> 00:17:12,910
Because you said it was nothing.
470
00:17:12,979 --> 00:17:15,756
When I hear the word
"nothing," I move on.
471
00:17:15,781 --> 00:17:16,781
Okay, can I just ask you...
472
00:17:16,850 --> 00:17:19,492
Why is it so hard for you
to be there for me?
473
00:17:20,021 --> 00:17:21,287
Seriously?
474
00:17:21,312 --> 00:17:23,054
When were you there for me?
475
00:17:23,123 --> 00:17:24,613
You picked a life
of travel and adventure
476
00:17:24,659 --> 00:17:26,424
over being there for your kids!
477
00:17:26,493 --> 00:17:28,759
I sound happy, but I'm very upset!
478
00:17:28,828 --> 00:17:30,962
Katie, I know
that I wasn't a good parent.
479
00:17:31,030 --> 00:17:33,064
You know, whatever that thing was
480
00:17:33,133 --> 00:17:34,832
that's supposed to kick in
just never kicked in.
481
00:17:34,901 --> 00:17:37,568
Well, maybe because
you were such a crappy mom,
482
00:17:37,637 --> 00:17:40,037
that's why I try so hard
to be a good mom.
483
00:17:40,106 --> 00:17:41,038
Oh!
484
00:17:41,107 --> 00:17:42,607
So I made you a good mom.
485
00:17:42,675 --> 00:17:44,342
Mnh-mnh. That's not what I'm saying.
486
00:17:44,410 --> 00:17:45,676
Not what I'm saying.
487
00:17:45,745 --> 00:17:47,912
And I'm sorry that I said that
about Anna-Kat.
488
00:17:47,981 --> 00:17:49,714
And I'm sorry
489
00:17:49,782 --> 00:17:52,216
that I missed so many things
when you were younger.
490
00:17:52,285 --> 00:17:54,189
- Mm.
- You know, like that weird, um,
491
00:17:54,259 --> 00:17:55,287
break-dancing thing.
492
00:17:55,288 --> 00:17:57,054
- Mm-hmm.
- It was always so important to you.
493
00:17:57,123 --> 00:17:58,323
Well, it's never too late, Mom.
494
00:17:58,358 --> 00:17:59,358
Okay?
495
00:17:59,425 --> 00:18:01,726
[Chuckles] Okay.
496
00:18:01,794 --> 00:18:02,794
Unh!
497
00:18:02,829 --> 00:18:04,729
Unh-unh! Unh!
498
00:18:04,797 --> 00:18:05,963
Wow.
499
00:18:06,032 --> 00:18:07,965
Mm-mm-mm!
500
00:18:08,034 --> 00:18:09,414
That's something.
501
00:18:09,938 --> 00:18:11,045
[Snorts]
502
00:18:11,070 --> 00:18:12,994
All right, why don't you
help me get out of this thing,
503
00:18:13,039 --> 00:18:15,139
and then we can go downstairs
and enjoy ourselves
504
00:18:15,208 --> 00:18:17,358
before Viv's happy pills wear off?
505
00:18:17,383 --> 00:18:19,076
I mean, where did you get this thing?
506
00:18:19,145 --> 00:18:20,978
Oh, I visited Ruth Jackson in the home.
507
00:18:21,047 --> 00:18:22,596
- Mm-hmm.
- And this was in her closet.
508
00:18:22,621 --> 00:18:24,649
- Mm.
- That woman doesn't have a clue.
509
00:18:24,674 --> 00:18:26,751
- No.
- Half the time, she goes to lunch nude.
510
00:18:26,819 --> 00:18:29,253
511
00:18:30,456 --> 00:18:32,623
Thank you for your gift earlier.
512
00:18:32,692 --> 00:18:34,269
- Oh!
- It did the job.
513
00:18:34,294 --> 00:18:36,771
[Chuckles] I've got gobs of them.
514
00:18:36,796 --> 00:18:38,062
[Both chuckle]
515
00:18:38,131 --> 00:18:40,320
I'm really glad you came.
516
00:18:40,393 --> 00:18:41,292
Wow.
517
00:18:41,346 --> 00:18:42,679
These pills are powerful.
518
00:18:42,781 --> 00:18:43,933
- Vali: Hey, Katie.
- Mm-hmm?
519
00:18:43,996 --> 00:18:46,066
Why don't you sit
your bottom here, next to me?
520
00:18:46,129 --> 00:18:47,636
Oh, Vali, I think I'm going to go ahead
521
00:18:47,661 --> 00:18:49,707
and probably sit next to anyone else.
522
00:18:49,783 --> 00:18:51,015
Fair enough.
523
00:18:51,053 --> 00:18:53,765
- I'll sit there.
- Okay.
524
00:18:53,947 --> 00:18:55,446
Mom.
525
00:18:55,515 --> 00:18:57,281
Do you want to go ahead
and sit next to me?
526
00:18:57,350 --> 00:18:59,116
Oh!
527
00:18:59,185 --> 00:19:01,719
I would love that.
528
00:19:03,122 --> 00:19:06,724
Hey, I'm sorry things
got awkward with us today.
529
00:19:06,793 --> 00:19:07,992
Let's just start over.
530
00:19:08,061 --> 00:19:09,760
Happy Thanksgiving, Greg.
531
00:19:09,829 --> 00:19:11,662
Oh, happy Thanksgiving.
532
00:19:13,366 --> 00:19:15,233
You... You just unhooked my bra.
533
00:19:17,070 --> 00:19:19,403
That's not even a thing
I can do if I'm trying!
534
00:19:19,472 --> 00:19:20,560
Oh, Greg.
535
00:19:25,782 --> 00:19:26,847
The one time a year
536
00:19:26,917 --> 00:19:28,649
we get little marshmallows
on sweet potatoes,
537
00:19:28,712 --> 00:19:30,819
and you're too high
to put them on the table.
538
00:19:30,888 --> 00:19:32,690
I made a lot of bad decisions yesterday.
539
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:35,026
You're telling me.
You left the oven on all night long.
540
00:19:35,075 --> 00:19:36,241
You could have burned down the house.
541
00:19:36,310 --> 00:19:37,443
I also left the sink on.
542
00:19:37,511 --> 00:19:39,071
It would have put out part of the fire.
543
00:19:39,814 --> 00:19:42,848
- [Cellphone chimes]
- Oh.
544
00:19:42,917 --> 00:19:44,716
[Gasps] No!
545
00:19:44,785 --> 00:19:46,218
No, no, no, no, no!
546
00:19:46,287 --> 00:19:47,319
What?
547
00:19:47,388 --> 00:19:50,088
Apparently, I also agreed to make
548
00:19:50,157 --> 00:19:52,692
an "Amazing Race"
audition video with my mom.
549
00:19:52,717 --> 00:19:54,259
Always say no to drugs, Katie.
550
00:19:54,328 --> 00:19:55,461
She wrote a script.
551
00:19:55,529 --> 00:19:57,629
She wants me to buy a purple tank top.
552
00:19:57,698 --> 00:19:59,666
- She is bananas!
- Hey.
553
00:20:06,736 --> 00:20:08,006
Honey.
554
00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:10,042
Mama's sorry.
555
00:20:10,110 --> 00:20:11,853
I know all this affects you,
556
00:20:11,939 --> 00:20:13,445
and I don't want to drive you crazy
557
00:20:13,514 --> 00:20:15,322
like my mom did with me.
558
00:20:15,779 --> 00:20:17,904
- So...
- Were you saying something?
559
00:20:17,975 --> 00:20:19,518
Oh. Yeah.
560
00:20:19,587 --> 00:20:20,886
Did you not hear me?
561
00:20:22,105 --> 00:20:24,277
Well, I just thought you were doing
all this lining-up business
562
00:20:24,301 --> 00:20:26,854
because you heard Mommy
getting crazy about Grandma's stuff.
563
00:20:27,512 --> 00:20:29,585
No, Mama. Don't worry about it.
564
00:20:29,657 --> 00:20:31,054
I've got my own crap.
565
00:20:31,079 --> 00:20:33,828
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
566
00:20:33,878 --> 00:20:38,428
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