Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,084 --> 00:00:04,087
WOMAN:
Previously on "All Night"...
2
00:00:04,088 --> 00:00:05,674
- Let's do this thing.
- Stop, Roni.
3
00:00:05,675 --> 00:00:07,301
I don't want this.
4
00:00:07,302 --> 00:00:10,140
- Ever think you might be
overlooking the obvious?
5
00:00:10,141 --> 00:00:11,686
He's gay.
6
00:00:11,687 --> 00:00:13,063
DEANNA: He only likes her
because she's pretty
7
00:00:13,064 --> 00:00:14,858
and plays a children's
instrument.
8
00:00:14,859 --> 00:00:16,571
What he and I have is--
- Is irrelevant.
9
00:00:16,572 --> 00:00:19,409
What you need is for him
to see you as his hot sister.
10
00:00:19,410 --> 00:00:21,204
You know what I mean.
11
00:00:21,205 --> 00:00:23,751
- For the valedictorian, huh?
- The future is female.
12
00:00:23,752 --> 00:00:25,547
- Whoo!
- And all of the sudden,
13
00:00:25,548 --> 00:00:27,718
you're a part of Roni's
little gang of minions
14
00:00:27,719 --> 00:00:29,470
and hanging out
with Alexis 24/7?
15
00:00:29,471 --> 00:00:31,182
Do you have a crush on her?
16
00:00:31,183 --> 00:00:32,895
- No.
17
00:00:34,566 --> 00:00:37,529
[upbeat music]
18
00:00:37,530 --> 00:00:40,367
??
19
00:00:40,368 --> 00:00:42,998
- An impressive
Prince selection.
20
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:44,375
- You know, my aunt met him
on a bus once,
21
00:00:44,376 --> 00:00:46,964
and he called her
"interesting."
22
00:00:46,965 --> 00:00:49,135
- Wow.
23
00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:50,972
Ooh, we should do Kiss.
24
00:00:50,973 --> 00:00:53,644
But with my falsetto,
it's just so obvious.
25
00:00:53,645 --> 00:00:55,690
What song do you want to sing?
26
00:00:55,691 --> 00:00:58,655
- How about that new one
called "I Just Sit and Watch"?
27
00:00:58,656 --> 00:01:00,115
- What?
You have an amazing voice.
28
00:01:00,116 --> 00:01:01,535
You sing for me all the time.
29
00:01:01,536 --> 00:01:02,704
- That doesn't mean I want
to do it
30
00:01:02,705 --> 00:01:04,374
in front
of the whole school.
31
00:01:04,375 --> 00:01:07,129
I am not Sherman Grove
High's resident rock star.
32
00:01:07,130 --> 00:01:09,342
- Well, I guess
this resident rock star
33
00:01:09,343 --> 00:01:11,471
will just have to serenade you.
34
00:01:11,472 --> 00:01:13,810
??
35
00:01:13,811 --> 00:01:15,270
- Do you remember
the choreography
36
00:01:15,271 --> 00:01:17,024
from our 8th grade
Taylor Swift medley?
37
00:01:17,025 --> 00:01:19,112
"From Heartache to Heartbreak,"
"Taylor's Journey,"
38
00:01:19,113 --> 00:01:21,324
because they have
all the songs in here.
39
00:01:21,325 --> 00:01:25,667
- Yeah, well, speaking
of heartache and heartbreak...
40
00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:28,296
- Ooh.
- [laughing]
41
00:01:28,297 --> 00:01:29,717
- Oh!
- Dude.
42
00:01:29,718 --> 00:01:32,304
- He's not gay, right?
43
00:01:32,305 --> 00:01:34,308
- Of course not.
44
00:01:34,309 --> 00:01:36,187
- It's normal bro-havior.
45
00:01:36,188 --> 00:01:37,941
Straight guys are obsessed
with their balls.
46
00:01:37,942 --> 00:01:39,695
- They love them.
47
00:01:39,696 --> 00:01:41,156
- Do you know how frustrating
it is to watch people
48
00:01:41,157 --> 00:01:42,534
butcher music
they didn't even write?
49
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:44,663
You know what we should do?
50
00:01:44,664 --> 00:01:46,166
- Find the most depressing,
mood-killing song in this book
51
00:01:46,167 --> 00:01:47,878
and sing it so seriously
52
00:01:47,879 --> 00:01:49,464
people want to crawl under
their chairs and weep?
53
00:01:49,465 --> 00:01:50,842
- I was thinking that
54
00:01:50,843 --> 00:01:52,094
they could just weep
into their hands,
55
00:01:52,095 --> 00:01:53,931
but your version
is much better.
56
00:01:53,932 --> 00:01:56,227
- Yeah.
57
00:01:56,228 --> 00:01:58,608
Oh, are you planning
on singing
58
00:01:58,609 --> 00:02:00,194
with your best pal, Alexis,
59
00:02:00,195 --> 00:02:02,949
or has she been preparing
for her solo performance
60
00:02:02,950 --> 00:02:04,703
since last year?
61
00:02:04,704 --> 00:02:07,166
- Yeah, yeah, I bet
she's putting fire in the show,
62
00:02:07,167 --> 00:02:08,878
or Riverdancing?
63
00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:11,216
No, she's gonna wear that
see-through leotard
64
00:02:11,217 --> 00:02:12,844
she wore for "Wicked."
65
00:02:12,845 --> 00:02:14,807
- Sadly, that leotard
is at the cleaner's,
66
00:02:14,808 --> 00:02:17,144
but I hear there
might be a cape.
67
00:02:17,145 --> 00:02:20,067
- All right.
- A cape?
68
00:02:20,068 --> 00:02:21,402
RONI: Are you seeing this?
69
00:02:21,403 --> 00:02:22,989
- He's dabbing it on
70
00:02:22,990 --> 00:02:25,703
just like the Sephora
lip specialist taught us.
71
00:02:25,704 --> 00:02:27,582
Oz is so smart.
72
00:02:27,583 --> 00:02:30,839
- Yeah, and so gay.
73
00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:33,845
[upbeat music]
74
00:02:33,846 --> 00:02:35,850
??
75
00:02:37,310 --> 00:02:38,604
- Yeah, dude.
76
00:02:38,605 --> 00:02:40,148
We're gonna kill it.
77
00:02:40,149 --> 00:02:41,735
Oh, babe, get this.
78
00:02:41,736 --> 00:02:44,825
We're gonna sing "Pony"
and go full "Magic Mike,"
79
00:02:44,826 --> 00:02:45,869
you know what I'm saying?
80
00:02:45,870 --> 00:02:47,454
[beatboxing]
81
00:02:47,455 --> 00:02:49,166
- I'm gonna need you to stop.
82
00:02:49,167 --> 00:02:51,797
Can we talk a sec?
83
00:02:51,798 --> 00:02:53,301
- Yeah, yeah, one sec.
84
00:02:59,898 --> 00:03:04,781
- Okay, so you know
how much I care about you.
85
00:03:04,782 --> 00:03:06,284
- I think so.
86
00:03:06,285 --> 00:03:08,706
- And you know when I care
about someone,
87
00:03:08,707 --> 00:03:10,375
I would do anything for them.
88
00:03:10,376 --> 00:03:12,087
I always put other
people first.
89
00:03:12,088 --> 00:03:15,303
It's, honestly,
probably my biggest flaw.
90
00:03:16,388 --> 00:03:17,600
- Sure.
91
00:03:19,604 --> 00:03:23,737
- So then you know you can talk
to me about anything.
92
00:03:24,572 --> 00:03:27,368
- Cool, yeah, thanks.
Uh, we good?
93
00:03:27,369 --> 00:03:28,996
I need to go, like,
stretch it out before "Pony."
94
00:03:28,997 --> 00:03:32,962
- What--what I'm saying is...
95
00:03:32,963 --> 00:03:35,425
you can come out.
96
00:03:35,426 --> 00:03:37,346
- Of?
97
00:03:37,347 --> 00:03:39,851
- Of this prison of walls
you've built around you.
98
00:03:39,852 --> 00:03:41,605
- Are you drunk?
99
00:03:41,606 --> 00:03:44,569
- I don't think I've ever been
more sober in my life.
100
00:03:44,570 --> 00:03:46,949
It's obviously hard for you
to say, but that's all right.
101
00:03:46,950 --> 00:03:48,953
I can speak for you.
102
00:03:48,954 --> 00:03:51,667
- Okay.
103
00:03:51,668 --> 00:03:53,295
- You're gay.
104
00:03:58,264 --> 00:03:59,641
- No, I'm not.
105
00:03:59,642 --> 00:04:01,603
- I'm not mad.
I'm an ally.
106
00:04:01,604 --> 00:04:03,774
Three words: it gets better.
107
00:04:03,775 --> 00:04:06,487
- Three more words:
I'm not gay.
108
00:04:06,488 --> 00:04:08,951
- Please, the tailoring,
the lippy.
109
00:04:08,952 --> 00:04:10,412
All the signs are there.
- Okay.
110
00:04:10,413 --> 00:04:12,876
I'm pretty sure
that's really offensive.
111
00:04:12,877 --> 00:04:14,336
- How about the most
obvious sign:
112
00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:15,673
you won't have sex with me.
113
00:04:15,674 --> 00:04:17,886
- That--that's not true,
exactly.
114
00:04:17,887 --> 00:04:19,556
- Am I not attractive?
115
00:04:19,557 --> 00:04:21,059
Am I not enough?
- No.
116
00:04:21,060 --> 00:04:22,394
You're beautiful.
- So you're gay.
117
00:04:22,395 --> 00:04:23,689
- I'm not gay.
118
00:04:23,690 --> 00:04:25,067
- That's the only
possible reason.
119
00:04:25,068 --> 00:04:26,486
- No, it's not.
- Then what is it?
120
00:04:26,487 --> 00:04:30,286
- I have a broken penis.
121
00:04:37,217 --> 00:04:40,222
[upbeat rock music]
122
00:04:40,223 --> 00:04:47,195
??
123
00:04:49,491 --> 00:04:51,077
- ? I don't need your love ?
124
00:04:51,078 --> 00:04:52,539
? I don't need your love ?
125
00:04:52,540 --> 00:04:55,210
? So why you
bringing me down? ?
126
00:04:55,211 --> 00:04:58,592
? Come on, lift me up,
come on, lift me up ?
127
00:04:58,593 --> 00:05:00,387
- Melinda!
128
00:05:00,388 --> 00:05:02,600
- ? You're not the only one,
not the only one ?
129
00:05:02,601 --> 00:05:04,395
- I'm not asking.
130
00:05:04,396 --> 00:05:06,608
Okay, I am, but willfully.
131
00:05:06,609 --> 00:05:08,069
- ? Come on, lift me up ?
132
00:05:08,070 --> 00:05:09,865
? Quit messing around ?
133
00:05:09,866 --> 00:05:12,620
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm really not the best dancer.
134
00:05:12,621 --> 00:05:14,165
I pretty much spend my life
135
00:05:14,166 --> 00:05:16,210
trying to avoid
dancing in pubic.
136
00:05:16,211 --> 00:05:18,173
- Didn't you go to prom?
- Yeah.
137
00:05:18,174 --> 00:05:20,511
I stamped your hand
at the door.
138
00:05:20,512 --> 00:05:21,680
??
139
00:05:21,681 --> 00:05:23,934
- Right, right, right, right.
140
00:05:23,935 --> 00:05:26,189
Excellent stamping skills.
- Thank you.
141
00:05:26,190 --> 00:05:32,869
??
142
00:05:32,870 --> 00:05:34,873
- Oh, it's five minutes
till karaoke.
143
00:05:34,874 --> 00:05:37,419
Bernie and I are about
to go up there and kill it.
144
00:05:37,420 --> 00:05:39,799
- This was fun. Thank you.
Thanks.
145
00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,553
- Hang on. Sing with us.
- No!
146
00:05:41,554 --> 00:05:43,849
The only thing more
terrifying than dancing
147
00:05:43,850 --> 00:05:46,605
in public is singing in public.
148
00:05:46,606 --> 00:05:49,151
- Well, that's all the more
reason you should do it.
149
00:05:49,152 --> 00:05:51,280
Plus, I heard if you sing,
you get a muffin.
150
00:05:51,281 --> 00:05:56,625
??
151
00:05:56,626 --> 00:05:58,169
- It better be blueberry.
152
00:05:58,170 --> 00:05:59,839
If it's bran, I walk.
153
00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:00,841
- Come on.
154
00:06:00,842 --> 00:06:06,771
??
155
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:13,324
- Not having my phone sucks,
156
00:06:13,325 --> 00:06:16,163
but I will say,
I do feel very mindful.
157
00:06:16,164 --> 00:06:19,128
- I'd feel a lot more mindful
if I had my mindfulness app.
158
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:20,130
- Hey, you seen Cody?
159
00:06:20,131 --> 00:06:21,465
- Last time I saw him,
160
00:06:21,466 --> 00:06:22,510
he was hanging out
with Stefania.
161
00:06:22,511 --> 00:06:24,681
- Have you seen Stefania?
162
00:06:24,682 --> 00:06:26,810
- No.
163
00:06:26,811 --> 00:06:29,273
- It is grad night, mi amigo.
164
00:06:29,274 --> 00:06:31,194
Anything can happen.
165
00:06:32,865 --> 00:06:36,955
- Aqua surveillance is the key
to finding cosplay_queen_7,
166
00:06:36,956 --> 00:06:40,211
the anonymous Tumblr icon
who has stolen our hearts.
167
00:06:40,212 --> 00:06:42,592
You take the land.
I'll take the sea.
168
00:06:42,593 --> 00:06:44,303
- Oh.
- What?
169
00:06:44,304 --> 00:06:46,057
- No, no, it's fine, I just
thought I'd take the sea.
170
00:06:46,058 --> 00:06:47,935
- I have the goggles.
- Because I lent them to you.
171
00:06:47,936 --> 00:06:49,313
- Do you want to take the sea?
Take the sea.
172
00:06:49,314 --> 00:06:50,649
- No, no, no, no, no.
[whistle blasts]
173
00:06:50,650 --> 00:06:53,739
- Karaoke will start
in five minutes.
174
00:06:53,740 --> 00:06:55,743
- Whoo!
175
00:06:55,744 --> 00:06:59,333
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
176
00:06:59,334 --> 00:07:02,089
??
177
00:07:02,090 --> 00:07:05,554
- Dang. The power of song.
178
00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:08,519
- You know you don't need
any of this stuff.
179
00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,313
- You don't need
any of this stuff.
180
00:07:10,314 --> 00:07:12,527
Your eyebrows
are crafted by angels.
181
00:07:12,528 --> 00:07:15,490
- Actually, an Estonian woman
called Greta.
182
00:07:15,491 --> 00:07:18,747
- Really?
I need her number.
183
00:07:18,748 --> 00:07:21,418
- Oh, sharing an esthetician.
184
00:07:21,419 --> 00:07:23,089
What's next,
holding hands in public?
185
00:07:23,090 --> 00:07:25,553
- [laughs]
Soon, okay?
186
00:07:25,554 --> 00:07:28,474
I just--
I need it to be the right time.
187
00:07:28,475 --> 00:07:32,650
- Hey, I know you'll come out
when you want, if you want,
188
00:07:32,651 --> 00:07:35,907
and, I'll admit, I'm
kind of digging the secrecy.
189
00:07:37,410 --> 00:07:40,583
- I know, right?
I mean, it's sort of fun.
190
00:07:40,584 --> 00:07:42,962
Remember that one time
at Roni's lake house,
191
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,551
where she asked me why
I was wearing your bikini top?
192
00:07:45,552 --> 00:07:47,763
- Yeah, and you told her
it was a style choice,
193
00:07:47,764 --> 00:07:50,644
and she and Lyssee switched
tops five minutes later.
194
00:07:50,645 --> 00:07:57,199
- You know, maybe we should
trade bras for fashion reasons.
195
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,622
- Okay.
196
00:08:06,343 --> 00:08:09,348
[upbeat dance music]
197
00:08:09,349 --> 00:08:12,354
??
198
00:08:12,355 --> 00:08:15,945
MAN: ? And now we're dancing
in the afterglow ?
199
00:08:15,946 --> 00:08:18,784
- And then the children's choir
comes in out of nowhere
200
00:08:18,785 --> 00:08:20,495
and somehow makes it
even sadder.
201
00:08:20,496 --> 00:08:23,334
"Christmas Shoes" is
the ultimate depressing song.
202
00:08:23,335 --> 00:08:25,547
- I was getting depressed
by "Christmas Shoes"
203
00:08:25,548 --> 00:08:26,925
way before it was cool.
204
00:08:26,926 --> 00:08:29,179
- Well, I own it
on a special green vinyl.
205
00:08:29,180 --> 00:08:32,394
The album cover
is shaped like an actual shoe.
206
00:08:32,395 --> 00:08:34,356
- What--then--
wait, wait, wait.
207
00:08:34,357 --> 00:08:38,072
How would you fit it
on the record--never mind.
208
00:08:38,073 --> 00:08:42,289
You know what, this is the best
possible iteration of karaoke.
209
00:08:42,290 --> 00:08:44,669
- Oh, even better than
singing with Roni
210
00:08:44,670 --> 00:08:46,255
while she provides
the backing track
211
00:08:46,256 --> 00:08:48,301
on her precious ukulele?
212
00:08:48,302 --> 00:08:50,138
- What do you have
against ukuleles?
213
00:08:50,139 --> 00:08:51,808
- They're guitars
that refuse to grow up.
214
00:08:51,809 --> 00:08:54,062
- All right.
Well, "Christmas Shoes" it is.
215
00:08:54,063 --> 00:08:56,651
It's got death, poverty,
and Jesus:
216
00:08:56,652 --> 00:08:58,865
the holy trinity of buzzkill.
217
00:09:00,744 --> 00:09:03,999
- Yeah, so it was broke.
218
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,755
Oh, there you guys are.
Great news.
219
00:09:06,756 --> 00:09:10,011
The whole "Oz is gay" thing
was a total misunderstanding.
220
00:09:10,012 --> 00:09:13,059
He broke his penis.
- During lacrosse.
221
00:09:13,060 --> 00:09:16,691
- Lacrosse?
- Yes, lacrosse.
222
00:09:16,692 --> 00:09:19,739
See, I knew there was a reason
he wasn't having sex with me.
223
00:09:19,740 --> 00:09:21,408
- I didn't know you could
break a penis.
224
00:09:21,409 --> 00:09:22,787
- Oh, you can.
225
00:09:22,788 --> 00:09:23,830
Although,
technically it's a fracture
226
00:09:23,831 --> 00:09:25,333
since there's no bone.
227
00:09:25,334 --> 00:09:27,838
Wait, Roni,
don't you go to every game?
228
00:09:27,839 --> 00:09:29,216
Wouldn't you have
seen this happen?
229
00:09:29,217 --> 00:09:30,969
- Oz has a really
high pain tolerance.
230
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:32,556
He might not have
noticed until after,
231
00:09:32,557 --> 00:09:34,519
or it could
have been at practice.
232
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:36,105
- Then why didn't he tell you?
233
00:09:36,106 --> 00:09:38,442
- I guess he didn't want
to worry me.
234
00:09:38,443 --> 00:09:41,073
Poor kid,
suffering in silence.
235
00:09:41,074 --> 00:09:42,827
- So brave.
236
00:09:42,828 --> 00:09:45,123
- This doesn't add up.
- Yes, it does.
237
00:09:45,124 --> 00:09:47,210
Here, let me show you.
238
00:09:47,211 --> 00:09:49,381
Okay, Jonas is Oz.
239
00:09:49,382 --> 00:09:50,592
- Hi--hey, guys.
240
00:09:50,593 --> 00:09:52,680
- There's no need
for Oz to speak.
241
00:09:52,681 --> 00:09:54,224
So Jonas is Oz,
242
00:09:54,225 --> 00:09:56,270
and I'm the opposing player
who is very evil.
243
00:09:56,271 --> 00:09:58,065
- How evil?
244
00:09:58,066 --> 00:10:00,988
Like Cersei Lannister evil
or like Voldemort evil?
245
00:10:00,989 --> 00:10:03,827
- Like their supremely
evil child.
246
00:10:03,828 --> 00:10:05,664
- What?
- [laughs]
247
00:10:05,665 --> 00:10:07,752
I don't think you understand
the ramifications in both canons of the--
248
00:10:07,753 --> 00:10:09,547
- Shh. Okay.
249
00:10:09,548 --> 00:10:13,095
So I'm coming at you
with my big stick, and--
250
00:10:13,096 --> 00:10:14,682
- Ahh!
- Yeah.
251
00:10:14,683 --> 00:10:16,770
But it's a contact sport,
so he's wearing a cup.
252
00:10:16,771 --> 00:10:18,230
- I'm not.
- Hush.
253
00:10:18,231 --> 00:10:21,613
So maybe the angle
is more like--
254
00:10:21,614 --> 00:10:23,365
- Ahh!
Maybe Stymie could be Oz.
255
00:10:23,366 --> 00:10:25,996
- And then it goes
under the cup, right?
256
00:10:25,997 --> 00:10:28,459
- And he was hard?
- What? No.
257
00:10:28,460 --> 00:10:30,296
Why would he be hard
during lacrosse?
258
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:31,465
- Love of the game.
259
00:10:31,466 --> 00:10:33,302
- Or maybe he was not aroused
260
00:10:33,303 --> 00:10:34,806
by lacrosse
and broke it anyway.
261
00:10:34,807 --> 00:10:37,268
- Ron, I'm sorry,
262
00:10:37,269 --> 00:10:39,439
but if he was flaccid,
he would have a bruise.
263
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:41,612
If he broke it, he was turgid.
264
00:10:43,031 --> 00:10:45,536
SAT word.
740 verbal, bitches.
265
00:10:45,537 --> 00:10:46,955
- I'm not getting
turgid for this.
266
00:10:46,956 --> 00:10:48,415
- No, you're--you're wrong.
267
00:10:48,416 --> 00:10:50,629
I mean, what makes you
such an expert?
268
00:10:50,630 --> 00:10:52,049
- I have a friend
who broke one.
269
00:10:53,301 --> 00:10:55,054
Google it.
- Okay.
270
00:10:55,055 --> 00:10:56,558
But what if a weight
fell on him,
271
00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:59,939
or Oz's soft
is like a normal guy's hard.
272
00:10:59,940 --> 00:11:02,820
- Roni, respectfully...
273
00:11:02,821 --> 00:11:05,449
your dude
was boning someone else.
274
00:11:05,450 --> 00:11:07,621
??
275
00:11:07,622 --> 00:11:09,543
- Is there any way
he could still be gay?
276
00:11:15,597 --> 00:11:17,725
- Left cheek.
- Right cheek.
277
00:11:17,726 --> 00:11:18,727
- Left cheek.
278
00:11:18,728 --> 00:11:19,979
- Right cheek.
279
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:21,356
- Left cheek.
- Right cheek.
280
00:11:21,357 --> 00:11:23,528
- Left cheek.
- Okay.
281
00:11:23,529 --> 00:11:26,450
BOTH: Shake that fatty,
shake, shake that fatty.
282
00:11:26,451 --> 00:11:30,082
Shake that fatty!
- Shake that fatty.
283
00:11:30,083 --> 00:11:32,128
- Ooh, she got a big one,
now it's getting smaller.
284
00:11:32,129 --> 00:11:34,049
Oh, cool, cool, 'cause
you should call her.
285
00:11:34,050 --> 00:11:35,844
Tell her that you are gonna...
286
00:11:35,845 --> 00:11:37,514
BOTH: Thighs, uh, thighs, uh.
287
00:11:37,515 --> 00:11:39,560
- Thighs, thighs, thighs.
288
00:11:39,561 --> 00:11:41,355
BOTH:
Thighs, uh, thighs, uh.
289
00:11:41,356 --> 00:11:42,983
- Da-da-da-da. Ay!
290
00:11:42,984 --> 00:11:44,612
Drop it down low,
put your hand on my booty.
291
00:11:44,613 --> 00:11:46,658
Take it back 'cause
you're broody, I'm fruity.
292
00:11:46,659 --> 00:11:48,494
I ain't playing games.
Do I look like a Tetris?
293
00:11:48,495 --> 00:11:50,039
Shake it so hard
that it's trimmer.
294
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:51,918
BOTH: Ooh-lee, booty sweat.
295
00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:53,630
Ooh-lee, booty sweat.
296
00:11:53,631 --> 00:11:56,511
Ooh-lee, booty sweat,
twerking...
297
00:11:56,512 --> 00:11:59,140
- Percocet.
- Hey, shake that fatty.
298
00:11:59,141 --> 00:12:00,852
- Shake, shake that fatty.
- Nope.
299
00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:02,773
The mic stays on you
till you show off those pipes.
300
00:12:02,774 --> 00:12:04,109
- I cannot do this.
- Come on.
301
00:12:04,110 --> 00:12:05,779
We're all embarrassing
ourselves.
302
00:12:05,780 --> 00:12:08,827
It's more embarrassing
not to embarrass yourself.
303
00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:10,914
All right, how about together.
Come on, hey.
304
00:12:10,915 --> 00:12:14,212
ALL: Shake that fatty,
shake, shake that fatty.
305
00:12:14,213 --> 00:12:18,220
Shake that fatty,
shake, shake that fatty, fatty.
306
00:12:18,221 --> 00:12:21,894
Shake that fatty, shake,
shake that fatty, fatty.
307
00:12:21,895 --> 00:12:25,610
Shake that fatty,
shake, shake that fatty.
308
00:12:25,611 --> 00:12:26,905
Shake that fatty.
309
00:12:30,203 --> 00:12:32,415
- I'm not gonna go back
in the pool.
310
00:12:32,416 --> 00:12:33,793
You don't have to sit up there.
311
00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:36,257
- Oh, great.
My back is killing me.
312
00:12:39,639 --> 00:12:42,018
- You got some nice def
on those shoulders.
313
00:12:42,019 --> 00:12:43,980
Were you on the swim team
in high school?
314
00:12:43,981 --> 00:12:46,611
- I was a cheerleader.
- Cool.
315
00:12:46,612 --> 00:12:48,948
Cool, cool, cool.
316
00:12:48,949 --> 00:12:52,497
I'm more of a winter
sports man, myself.
317
00:12:52,498 --> 00:12:54,084
- Do you play hockey?
318
00:12:54,085 --> 00:12:56,589
- Do a bit of curling.
319
00:12:56,590 --> 00:12:59,219
They have a team
up at Dartmouth--
320
00:12:59,220 --> 00:13:01,139
where I'm going to school
in the fall--
321
00:13:01,140 --> 00:13:06,191
to be a doctor--
maybe without borders.
322
00:13:06,192 --> 00:13:08,905
- [laughs]
323
00:13:08,906 --> 00:13:11,159
Have fun looking
at a lot of rashes.
324
00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:12,831
- Oh, I will.
325
00:13:16,045 --> 00:13:18,968
- Okay, well, I'm gonna go
use the restroom.
326
00:13:21,723 --> 00:13:22,808
- I'll try not to drown
while you're gone.
327
00:13:22,809 --> 00:13:24,521
- Yeah, either way.
328
00:13:37,087 --> 00:13:40,635
[indistinct chatter]
329
00:13:40,636 --> 00:13:42,556
- Maybe he's in the lounge.
- Yeah.
330
00:13:42,557 --> 00:13:44,225
- There he is.
- Hey.
331
00:13:44,226 --> 00:13:47,941
- You disgusting, rotten,
cheating little slut.
332
00:13:47,942 --> 00:13:49,402
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, babe.
333
00:13:49,403 --> 00:13:51,323
- Don't you "babe" me.
334
00:13:51,324 --> 00:13:53,327
There was no
lacrosse dick-breaking.
335
00:13:53,328 --> 00:13:56,876
There was only you cheating
on your super-hot, kind,
336
00:13:56,877 --> 00:13:58,880
whimsical girlfriend
dick-breaking.
337
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,675
- No way.
Babe, it was lacrosse.
338
00:14:00,676 --> 00:14:02,804
- Oh, yeah?
Show me how it happened.
339
00:14:02,805 --> 00:14:04,975
- You're being crazy.
340
00:14:04,976 --> 00:14:06,687
- Show me.
- Okay.
341
00:14:06,688 --> 00:14:09,985
So, I mean, you know,
I was just playing lacrosse,
342
00:14:09,986 --> 00:14:12,991
like I do, you know,
really well,
343
00:14:12,992 --> 00:14:15,705
and so--and the ball
just kind of hit me right here.
344
00:14:15,706 --> 00:14:17,124
- Wrong.
345
00:14:17,125 --> 00:14:19,253
- The guy's stick just--
- How?
346
00:14:19,254 --> 00:14:20,422
- Well, there's certain
angles--
347
00:14:20,423 --> 00:14:21,842
- There aren't.
- Okay.
348
00:14:21,843 --> 00:14:23,805
You know what?
Fine, yeah, I cheated.
349
00:14:23,806 --> 00:14:25,725
So congratulations, Bones.
350
00:14:25,726 --> 00:14:28,189
You cracked the case
of the hot sophomore.
351
00:14:33,366 --> 00:14:36,622
- I can't believe you would
do this to us--to me.
352
00:14:36,623 --> 00:14:39,753
And with a sophomore?
353
00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:41,882
- Yeah.
354
00:14:41,883 --> 00:14:44,680
I mean, if it helps,
she kind of looks like you.
355
00:14:44,681 --> 00:14:48,020
- Nobody looks like Roni.
She's unique and perfect.
356
00:14:48,021 --> 00:14:50,274
Oh, you think that's funny,
funny boy?
357
00:14:50,275 --> 00:14:53,030
Come at me, bro.
- Forget it, Lyssee.
358
00:14:53,031 --> 00:14:55,785
I already have.
359
00:14:55,786 --> 00:15:01,296
??
360
00:15:01,297 --> 00:15:03,801
- Alexis.
361
00:15:03,802 --> 00:15:07,601
Hey, you've got sad eyes.
362
00:15:07,602 --> 00:15:10,230
I dig it.
- What?
363
00:15:10,231 --> 00:15:12,068
- And just so you know,
364
00:15:12,069 --> 00:15:14,573
my dick's
the opposite of broken.
365
00:15:14,574 --> 00:15:16,744
- And the size
of that tiny blue pill.
366
00:15:16,745 --> 00:15:18,957
Sounds about right.
367
00:15:21,922 --> 00:15:24,426
[indistinct chatter]
368
00:15:25,846 --> 00:15:27,849
- You ready?
369
00:15:27,850 --> 00:15:29,895
- If you are.
370
00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:31,817
- Let's do it, dude.
371
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,206
[dramatic instrumental music]
372
00:15:42,087 --> 00:15:44,006
??
373
00:15:44,007 --> 00:15:47,346
- ? It was almost
Christmastime ?
374
00:15:47,347 --> 00:15:50,895
- ? There I stood
in another line ?
375
00:15:50,896 --> 00:15:54,653
BOTH: ? Trying to buy
the best gift or two ?
376
00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:58,076
? Not really
in the Christmas mood ?
377
00:15:58,077 --> 00:16:01,166
? And standing right
in front of me ?
378
00:16:01,167 --> 00:16:05,424
? Was a little boy
waiting anxiously ?
379
00:16:05,425 --> 00:16:08,681
? Pacing around
like little boys do ?
380
00:16:08,682 --> 00:16:11,394
? And in his hands he held ?
381
00:16:11,395 --> 00:16:16,029
? A pair of shoes ?
382
00:16:16,030 --> 00:16:19,410
? And his clothes
were worn and old ?
383
00:16:19,411 --> 00:16:23,460
? He was dirty
from head to toe ?
384
00:16:23,461 --> 00:16:26,759
? And when it came
his time to pay ?
385
00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:31,977
? I couldn't believe
what I heard him say ?
386
00:16:31,978 --> 00:16:35,652
? So I want to buy
these shoes ?
387
00:16:35,653 --> 00:16:39,492
? For my mama, please ?
388
00:16:39,493 --> 00:16:41,872
- ? It's Christmastime
and these... ?
389
00:16:41,873 --> 00:16:46,757
BOTH:
? Shoes are just her size ?
390
00:16:46,758 --> 00:16:49,387
- ? Could you hurry, sir ?
391
00:16:49,388 --> 00:16:52,184
? Daddy says there's not much
time-- ?
392
00:16:52,185 --> 00:16:54,355
- I have an announcement
concerning all of you.
393
00:16:54,356 --> 00:16:57,403
Roni Sweetzer is effing single.
394
00:16:57,404 --> 00:17:00,536
[cheers and applause]
395
00:17:05,754 --> 00:17:08,258
- Fig.
- Yeah, oh.
396
00:17:08,259 --> 00:17:11,598
Uh, yeah.
"Christmas Shoes," everyone.
397
00:17:11,599 --> 00:17:14,313
Whoo!
398
00:17:19,949 --> 00:17:21,869
- It's only fun to make
grad night look sad
399
00:17:21,870 --> 00:17:23,413
when it's two people singing;
when it's one person singing,
400
00:17:23,414 --> 00:17:25,459
grad night
doesn't look sad, I do.
401
00:17:25,460 --> 00:17:27,964
- Yes, but you nailed the song.
402
00:17:27,965 --> 00:17:30,595
- I objectively did not.
- Why are you so upset?
403
00:17:30,596 --> 00:17:33,058
So we didn't show karaoke,
Roni did.
404
00:17:33,059 --> 00:17:36,189
I get that you hate her,
but this isn't a big deal.
405
00:17:36,190 --> 00:17:39,988
- Because you bailed on me.
I get it.
406
00:17:39,989 --> 00:17:41,659
It's not a big deal,
but you still did.
407
00:17:41,660 --> 00:17:43,286
- Okay, you're right.
408
00:17:43,287 --> 00:17:46,000
I'm sorry, but it's just--
409
00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:47,712
I've been waiting
for this for so long.
410
00:17:47,713 --> 00:17:49,549
Roni Sweetzer's effing single.
411
00:17:49,550 --> 00:17:51,804
- And she still effing sucks.
412
00:17:51,805 --> 00:17:53,390
- You don't even know her.
413
00:17:53,391 --> 00:17:54,810
- You
don't even know her.
414
00:17:54,811 --> 00:17:56,229
- I'm the one that's been
following her
415
00:17:56,230 --> 00:17:58,316
for like four years.
- Seriously?
416
00:17:58,317 --> 00:17:59,695
- I've seen all her posts
on Instagram.
417
00:17:59,696 --> 00:18:01,239
Her covers actually
mean something.
418
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:02,951
- Oh, my God, I can't
with you right now.
419
00:18:02,952 --> 00:18:05,080
I'm gonna go find Cassie,
you know, my friend
420
00:18:05,081 --> 00:18:07,084
who didn't leave me standing
on that stage singing a song
421
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:09,506
about shoes for a dying woman
to meet Jesus in.
422
00:18:09,507 --> 00:18:11,885
- [laughing]
- It's not funny.
423
00:18:11,886 --> 00:18:15,100
- It's pretty--it's funny.
424
00:18:15,101 --> 00:18:17,564
- Kill it!
- Yes!
425
00:18:17,565 --> 00:18:19,651
[video game beeping]
426
00:18:19,652 --> 00:18:22,949
- Oh, my gosh, you're amazing.
427
00:18:22,950 --> 00:18:26,456
You know, if I were in love
with a ridiculously hot guy
428
00:18:26,457 --> 00:18:29,629
and found out the entire thing
was a cruel charade,
429
00:18:29,630 --> 00:18:33,889
I'd be a total mess, but
you're handling this so well.
430
00:18:36,561 --> 00:18:38,438
- I'm so, so sad,
431
00:18:38,439 --> 00:18:40,651
and I can't even
tweet song lyrics
432
00:18:40,652 --> 00:18:43,783
because I have no phone,
and no Oz, and...
433
00:18:43,784 --> 00:18:47,457
[crying]
I just want my mom.
434
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:50,671
- It's okay.
435
00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:53,427
I can be strong for both of us.
436
00:18:57,435 --> 00:18:59,313
- Oh, you're still here?
437
00:18:59,314 --> 00:19:02,236
- Uh...
Uh, yeah.
438
00:19:02,237 --> 00:19:04,866
Sorry, here.
- Thanks.
439
00:19:04,867 --> 00:19:06,327
- I wish I had
something else to read,
440
00:19:06,328 --> 00:19:10,043
like--like maybe
an "O" Magazine.
441
00:19:10,044 --> 00:19:13,676
Some other things I like
are chunky jewelry
442
00:19:13,677 --> 00:19:16,640
over a cashmere
sweater cape...
443
00:19:16,641 --> 00:19:18,351
Zumba...
444
00:19:18,352 --> 00:19:19,647
- [laughs]
Uh...
445
00:19:21,316 --> 00:19:23,069
- Cozying up with some ros�
446
00:19:23,070 --> 00:19:26,535
and whatever's
on Lifetime Movie Network.
447
00:19:26,536 --> 00:19:28,707
- Wait, you're into LMN?
448
00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:33,172
- Yeah, yeah.
449
00:19:33,173 --> 00:19:35,761
- Most people think
Lifetime doesn't bother
450
00:19:35,762 --> 00:19:37,180
with movies anymore.
451
00:19:37,181 --> 00:19:39,728
- What?
Those people are imbeciles.
452
00:19:39,729 --> 00:19:42,817
They had to create a whole
separate channel for the movies
453
00:19:42,818 --> 00:19:45,196
because they're so awesome.
- Exactly.
454
00:19:45,197 --> 00:19:47,409
I mean, my husband
always teases me about it,
455
00:19:47,410 --> 00:19:49,998
but I think
it is quality programming.
456
00:19:49,999 --> 00:19:51,793
- Did you catch the one
that was on last weekend?
457
00:19:51,794 --> 00:19:53,505
BOTH: "Pandora's Basket."
458
00:19:53,506 --> 00:19:56,177
- So good.
So relevant.
459
00:19:56,178 --> 00:19:58,431
That scene where Alice
goes into Dante's dresser
460
00:19:58,432 --> 00:20:00,060
and discovers all
the broken wind chimes?
461
00:20:00,061 --> 00:20:02,147
- Haunting.
- Haunting.
462
00:20:02,148 --> 00:20:03,483
- Hey there, Bryce.
463
00:20:03,484 --> 00:20:05,153
You're not
in there singing karaoke?
464
00:20:05,154 --> 00:20:09,328
- No.
I'm going to be a doctor.
465
00:20:09,329 --> 00:20:11,082
- Hon, your two hours is up.
466
00:20:11,083 --> 00:20:14,965
I can take over, although
it's not actually taking over
467
00:20:14,966 --> 00:20:17,177
since you're not even
in the chair.
468
00:20:17,178 --> 00:20:18,931
- Oh, no one's swimming.
469
00:20:18,932 --> 00:20:20,100
- Maybe they feel,
470
00:20:20,101 --> 00:20:21,352
I don't know, unsafe,
471
00:20:21,353 --> 00:20:24,149
since no one's in the chair.
472
00:20:24,150 --> 00:20:25,402
- I think it's fine.
473
00:20:25,403 --> 00:20:28,534
- Hello, is that
a new swimsuit?
474
00:20:28,535 --> 00:20:30,245
- You like it?
- Yeah.
475
00:20:30,246 --> 00:20:33,669
But I thought we were saving
up for a new upright vac.
476
00:20:33,670 --> 00:20:38,512
- Ugh, God.
477
00:20:38,513 --> 00:20:40,223
??
478
00:20:40,224 --> 00:20:42,603
- Stay out of that water.
479
00:20:42,604 --> 00:20:44,189
Stay out.
480
00:20:44,190 --> 00:20:48,489
??
481
00:20:48,490 --> 00:20:54,209
- ? I'm coming out ?
482
00:20:54,210 --> 00:20:55,713
??
483
00:20:55,714 --> 00:20:57,299
? I'm coming ?
484
00:20:57,300 --> 00:20:59,344
? I'm coming out ?
485
00:20:59,345 --> 00:21:06,192
? I want the world to know,
I got to let it show ?
486
00:21:06,193 --> 00:21:08,739
? I'm coming out ?
487
00:21:08,740 --> 00:21:14,793
? I want the world to know,
I got to let it show ?
488
00:21:14,794 --> 00:21:16,797
? There's a new me coming out ?
489
00:21:16,798 --> 00:21:19,009
? And I just have to live ?
490
00:21:19,010 --> 00:21:22,265
- Okay, even I have to admit
this is pretty great.
491
00:21:22,266 --> 00:21:24,061
- It's amazing.
492
00:21:24,062 --> 00:21:27,944
- ? I think this time around
I am gonna do it ?
493
00:21:27,945 --> 00:21:29,446
? Like you never knew it ?
494
00:21:29,447 --> 00:21:31,910
- I think she's
saying she's gay.
495
00:21:31,911 --> 00:21:33,747
- Dude, just because she
doesn't want to go out with you
496
00:21:33,748 --> 00:21:35,125
doesn't make her a lesbian.
497
00:21:35,126 --> 00:21:37,212
- Why does everyone think
everyone is gay?
498
00:21:37,213 --> 00:21:41,303
- ? I have to shout
that I am coming out ?
499
00:21:41,304 --> 00:21:44,017
? I'm coming out ?
500
00:21:44,018 --> 00:21:49,821
? I want the world to know,
I got to let it show ?
501
00:21:49,822 --> 00:21:52,367
? I'm coming out ?
502
00:21:52,368 --> 00:21:54,664
- That's my girl!
Whoo!
503
00:21:54,665 --> 00:21:58,672
- ? I want the world to know,
I got to let it show ?
504
00:21:58,673 --> 00:22:00,968
I'm coming out!
505
00:22:00,969 --> 00:22:03,975
[cheers and applause]
506
00:22:06,271 --> 00:22:07,732
P.S.,
507
00:22:07,733 --> 00:22:10,362
I'm gay.
508
00:22:11,616 --> 00:22:14,622
[cheers and applause]
509
00:22:24,057 --> 00:22:27,062
[upbeat music]
510
00:22:27,063 --> 00:22:31,487
??
511
00:22:31,488 --> 00:22:34,869
- Oh, I wish I had my phone!
Yay!
512
00:22:34,870 --> 00:22:37,876
[cheers and applause]
513
00:22:46,059 --> 00:22:49,064
[upbeat rock music]
514
00:22:49,065 --> 00:22:56,037
??
515
00:22:56,087 --> 00:23:00,637
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
36978
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof