All language subtitles for About a Boy s02e13 About a Cat Party.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,684 --> 00:00:07,426 Happy Valentine's day! 2 00:00:07,461 --> 00:00:09,161 Uch. Valentine's day. 3 00:00:09,196 --> 00:00:10,563 Do you not like Valentine's day? 4 00:00:10,597 --> 00:00:12,431 It's such a consumerist holiday, you know? 5 00:00:12,466 --> 00:00:14,133 Why should you be forced to buy me a present 6 00:00:14,167 --> 00:00:15,434 just because the government told you to? 7 00:00:15,469 --> 00:00:16,469 Right? 8 00:00:16,503 --> 00:00:18,270 You didn't plan anything, did you? 9 00:00:18,305 --> 00:00:20,606 - Nothing big. - Good. 10 00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:22,341 So we walking to school or what? 11 00:00:22,376 --> 00:00:27,546 Uh, yes, uh... Can you just give me one second? 12 00:00:27,581 --> 00:00:30,549 Nothing's bigger than love 13 00:00:30,584 --> 00:00:32,885 Whoa-oh ooh-whoa-oh... 14 00:00:32,919 --> 00:00:34,253 - [record scratching] - Will, shut it all down. 15 00:00:34,287 --> 00:00:36,489 Send the horse back! She doesn't want it! 16 00:00:36,523 --> 00:00:37,623 Send the horse back? 17 00:00:37,657 --> 00:00:38,958 I don't know how to drive this thing! 18 00:00:38,992 --> 00:00:40,159 I'm here for the spectacle! 19 00:00:40,193 --> 00:00:42,328 Here we go. 20 00:00:42,362 --> 00:00:44,797 [Brett Dennen's Comeback Kid [That's My Dog]] 21 00:00:44,831 --> 00:00:47,299 Well, maybe it's the common curse 22 00:00:47,334 --> 00:00:50,035 Maybe things get bad before they get worse 23 00:00:50,070 --> 00:00:53,005 I don't want to become someone 24 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:55,975 Who can't live up to what I already done, don't 25 00:00:56,009 --> 00:00:58,244 Here comes a comeback 26 00:00:58,278 --> 00:01:00,446 The kid is back, is back on track 27 00:01:00,480 --> 00:01:03,149 And there goes my hero 28 00:01:03,183 --> 00:01:06,385 He's the underdog, he's coming out on top, and 29 00:01:06,420 --> 00:01:08,554 [cheers and applause] 30 00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:16,028 [sniffing] 31 00:01:30,844 --> 00:01:32,578 Oh, hi, Will. 32 00:01:32,612 --> 00:01:34,046 How are you doing? Are you all right? 33 00:01:34,081 --> 00:01:35,815 There was a pancake in my dumbwaiter. 34 00:01:35,849 --> 00:01:37,116 What's going on here? 35 00:01:37,150 --> 00:01:39,051 Well, you know, it's Valentine's day. 36 00:01:39,086 --> 00:01:41,587 It must be especially hard for you, 'cause, 37 00:01:41,621 --> 00:01:44,023 you know, you're obviously alone. 38 00:01:44,057 --> 00:01:46,759 [laughs] Yeah, so these are pity pancakes? 39 00:01:46,793 --> 00:01:49,228 Fiona, I am single by choice. 40 00:01:49,262 --> 00:01:52,998 It's okay, you can wear your heart on your sleeve 41 00:01:53,033 --> 00:01:54,467 - around me. - This is such nonsense. 42 00:01:54,501 --> 00:01:56,836 Let me tell you something. Valentine's day 43 00:01:56,870 --> 00:01:59,171 is the best day of the year to hit on women... 44 00:01:59,206 --> 00:02:00,639 - That's disgusting. - And tonight, 45 00:02:00,674 --> 00:02:04,877 I am going out, and I am bringing the best wingman 46 00:02:04,911 --> 00:02:06,645 this good earth has ever seen, 47 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:07,713 - TJ! - TJ. 48 00:02:07,748 --> 00:02:08,714 Yo, yo, yo. 49 00:02:08,749 --> 00:02:11,117 That bastion of good life choices. 50 00:02:11,151 --> 00:02:15,388 And we are going to resurrect an old favorite of ours 51 00:02:15,422 --> 00:02:17,056 called "sad cupid." 52 00:02:17,090 --> 00:02:18,257 You know what I'm going to do for you? 53 00:02:18,291 --> 00:02:20,893 I am going to show you how "sad cupid" works. 54 00:02:20,927 --> 00:02:23,062 All right, let's just pretend for a moment. 55 00:02:23,096 --> 00:02:26,132 This is a bar, you are an attractive woman. 56 00:02:26,166 --> 00:02:28,501 Attractive to me, okay? 57 00:02:28,535 --> 00:02:30,503 Oka... never mind, let's just move on, all right. 58 00:02:30,537 --> 00:02:32,104 You're here with your friends, I come up, 59 00:02:32,139 --> 00:02:33,773 I say something like, 60 00:02:33,807 --> 00:02:35,775 hey ladies, how you doing? 61 00:02:35,809 --> 00:02:40,413 Yeah, I really like your tank top. 62 00:02:40,447 --> 00:02:44,817 Anyway, it's kind of a weird night to be at a bar, right? 63 00:02:44,851 --> 00:02:46,352 Yeah, I wasn't going to go out tonight, 64 00:02:46,386 --> 00:02:50,222 but my friend TJ over there, that handsome fella, is just 65 00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,491 having a really, really tough time. 66 00:02:52,526 --> 00:02:54,694 Yeah, he got his heart broken. [sighs] 67 00:02:54,728 --> 00:02:57,863 You know, this may seem weird, but would one of you 68 00:02:57,898 --> 00:02:59,732 go over there and buy him a drink? 69 00:02:59,766 --> 00:03:02,935 I just... I want him to believe I. 70 00:03:02,969 --> 00:03:06,138 I keep thinking you can't sink any lower, 71 00:03:06,173 --> 00:03:07,273 and then you do. 72 00:03:07,307 --> 00:03:09,141 I'm sorry, did I just hear threesome? 73 00:03:09,176 --> 00:03:11,744 I'm so flattered, and I'd love to, 74 00:03:11,778 --> 00:03:13,012 but I couldn't do that to TJ. 75 00:03:13,046 --> 00:03:14,680 One of you should go over with him. 76 00:03:14,715 --> 00:03:16,782 And that's the thing, you send the unattractive one over there, 77 00:03:16,817 --> 00:03:18,317 so you can head over there now. 78 00:03:18,352 --> 00:03:21,120 And then I'm speaking to her and we're just vibing it up. 79 00:03:21,154 --> 00:03:24,156 Oh, you live in a sorority? That's fun. 80 00:03:24,191 --> 00:03:26,525 That's fun. Oh, you have a jacuzzi? 81 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:29,261 Oh, no, no, no, no. That's... That's okay. 82 00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:30,696 I don't have a bathing suit either. 83 00:03:32,099 --> 00:03:34,200 Ooh. 84 00:03:34,234 --> 00:03:35,601 Wha... what is it? 85 00:03:35,636 --> 00:03:36,802 It's the tooth of a baby gibbon 86 00:03:36,837 --> 00:03:38,337 I befriended in Indonesia. 87 00:03:38,372 --> 00:03:40,239 They're a remarkably romantic species. 88 00:03:40,273 --> 00:03:42,875 They're monogamous. Oh, that's very romantic. 89 00:03:42,909 --> 00:03:44,477 - Yeah. - I'll treasure it forever, 90 00:03:44,511 --> 00:03:45,678 thank you. 91 00:03:45,712 --> 00:03:48,614 - [baby cries] - Oh, my Goddess. 92 00:03:48,648 --> 00:03:50,850 That's my doula ring. 93 00:03:50,884 --> 00:03:54,086 - Calliope is in labor. - Your first baby being born. 94 00:03:54,121 --> 00:03:56,155 And on Valentine's day! How magical! 95 00:03:56,189 --> 00:03:57,156 I've got to get to the hospital. 96 00:03:57,190 --> 00:03:58,724 Okay, okay, let's go. 97 00:03:58,759 --> 00:04:00,526 Wait, I... oh. 98 00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:02,161 Shea's coming over to see Marcus... I've gotta call Will. 99 00:04:02,195 --> 00:04:04,030 No, no, no, hold on. I can watch them. 100 00:04:04,064 --> 00:04:05,398 Really? 101 00:04:05,432 --> 00:04:07,166 I'd love the opportunity to bond with him. 102 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:09,568 Oh... You're a wonderful, remarkable man. 103 00:04:09,603 --> 00:04:10,970 Bup-bup-bup. Now go. 104 00:04:11,004 --> 00:04:12,972 Assist a nurse in assisting a doctor in assisting a woman 105 00:04:13,006 --> 00:04:14,473 into bringing a child into this world. 106 00:04:14,508 --> 00:04:16,809 Wait, here, in case she doesn't like the uke. 107 00:04:16,843 --> 00:04:18,678 No offense but, I mean, who doesn't like a uke? 108 00:04:18,712 --> 00:04:20,112 Well... 109 00:04:20,147 --> 00:04:23,115 - happy Valentine's day. - Happy Valentine's day. 110 00:04:27,421 --> 00:04:30,756 Me and Marcus. I got this, I got this. 111 00:04:30,791 --> 00:04:32,992 [doorbell rings] 112 00:04:33,026 --> 00:04:35,494 Hey, Shea, happy day just like any other day. 113 00:04:35,529 --> 00:04:37,630 Hey, Shea, nice to see you outside of detention. 114 00:04:37,664 --> 00:04:39,432 Great, a teacher. 115 00:04:39,466 --> 00:04:41,267 It's gonna be a rockin' Friday night. 116 00:04:41,301 --> 00:04:43,102 You'll barely know he's here. 117 00:04:43,136 --> 00:04:44,870 He'll be invisible. 118 00:04:44,905 --> 00:04:45,972 I got a great idea, guys. 119 00:04:46,006 --> 00:04:47,440 Can you give me 120 00:04:47,474 --> 00:04:49,642 - just one minute... I'm sorry. - Again? 121 00:04:49,676 --> 00:04:52,378 This is supposed to be my first in-house date, 122 00:04:52,412 --> 00:04:54,180 and you're really c-blocking me here. 123 00:04:54,214 --> 00:04:56,382 - Excuse me? - A cuddle block. 124 00:04:56,416 --> 00:04:57,750 Will calls me it all the time. 125 00:04:57,784 --> 00:05:00,186 I just... I want to cuddle and watch a movie. 126 00:05:00,220 --> 00:05:01,620 Look, I promised your mom I'd supervise. 127 00:05:01,655 --> 00:05:03,889 Okay, you need to give me some breathing room. 128 00:05:03,924 --> 00:05:05,858 - I am choking here. - Okay. 129 00:05:05,892 --> 00:05:08,761 I get it. I'll, uh... I'll be in the kitchen 130 00:05:08,795 --> 00:05:10,763 if anybody needs me. 131 00:05:16,003 --> 00:05:17,570 So what are we doing? 132 00:05:17,604 --> 00:05:19,939 Well, I was thinking maybe we could watch a movie? 133 00:05:19,973 --> 00:05:21,440 My mom has a collection of black and white 134 00:05:21,475 --> 00:05:24,210 British garden comedies of manners from the 1930s. 135 00:05:24,244 --> 00:05:25,678 Those are always a hoot. 136 00:05:25,712 --> 00:05:28,147 That's what you have planned for tonight? 137 00:05:28,181 --> 00:05:32,151 Well, you said you didn't want to do anything special, so... 138 00:05:32,185 --> 00:05:35,921 Whatever. I don't care what we do. 139 00:05:35,956 --> 00:05:38,491 You know, I'm sensing some angry-type vibes 140 00:05:38,525 --> 00:05:40,359 coming from you. Are you mad about something? 141 00:05:40,394 --> 00:05:41,861 Nope. 142 00:05:41,895 --> 00:05:44,730 - Well, good, because... - Could you just stop talking? 143 00:05:44,765 --> 00:05:48,167 Your voice is making me want to tear my ears out. 144 00:05:48,201 --> 00:05:50,369 [mouthing word] Okay. 145 00:05:52,239 --> 00:05:55,241 [background music] [chatter] 146 00:06:01,882 --> 00:06:03,082 - Hi. - Hi there. 147 00:06:03,116 --> 00:06:05,518 - What can I get you? - Okay, uh... 148 00:06:05,552 --> 00:06:08,521 Well, I'll have what the lovely lady here is having. 149 00:06:08,555 --> 00:06:11,690 That's a cranberry appletini, extra cherries. 150 00:06:11,725 --> 00:06:13,192 - That's what you want? - That sure is. 151 00:06:13,226 --> 00:06:14,493 It's my favorite beverage. 152 00:06:14,528 --> 00:06:15,494 - Is it? - Mm-hmm. 153 00:06:15,529 --> 00:06:16,963 Okay. 154 00:06:20,767 --> 00:06:22,468 Still feeling good about that drink? 155 00:06:22,502 --> 00:06:23,836 - Yep. - Okay. 156 00:06:23,870 --> 00:06:28,274 Well, I put extra, extra cherries in just for you. 157 00:06:28,308 --> 00:06:29,909 Great. [mutters] Fine. 158 00:06:29,943 --> 00:06:32,144 So drink it. 159 00:06:37,017 --> 00:06:39,151 That is... [grunts] Quite sweet. 160 00:06:39,186 --> 00:06:40,152 - Thank you. - Mmhmm. 161 00:06:40,187 --> 00:06:41,220 Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! 162 00:06:41,254 --> 00:06:44,123 Hey, hey, hey! TJ is in the house! 163 00:06:44,157 --> 00:06:46,158 There are a lot of good-looking girls here tonight, 164 00:06:46,193 --> 00:06:49,328 and I for one am ready to get my "sad cupid" on. 165 00:06:49,363 --> 00:06:52,365 You know, Will, I find "sad cupid" to be a little immature. 166 00:06:52,399 --> 00:06:54,700 Immature? You have a dog named Mr. Crapsalot. 167 00:06:54,735 --> 00:06:57,603 Sir Crapsalot, and there's been a change of plans. 168 00:06:57,638 --> 00:06:58,704 - What? - There's someone very special 169 00:06:58,739 --> 00:06:59,805 I want you to meet. 170 00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:01,007 Bonjour, bonjour, bonjour. 171 00:07:01,041 --> 00:07:03,175 - Hello. - Will, this is Chloe. 172 00:07:03,210 --> 00:07:06,312 She is from France, and I met her on the way over here. 173 00:07:06,346 --> 00:07:08,748 [whispers] And I'm pretty sure she's the one. 174 00:07:11,218 --> 00:07:12,985 How's that appletini going down? 175 00:07:13,020 --> 00:07:14,153 - It's going great. - Yeah? 176 00:07:14,187 --> 00:07:15,521 Thank you, yeah. 177 00:07:18,658 --> 00:07:20,459 Give me another one. Make it a double. 178 00:07:20,494 --> 00:07:21,694 - You got it. - More cherries, too. 179 00:07:21,728 --> 00:07:22,728 Uh-huh. 180 00:07:26,399 --> 00:07:28,200 What are you doing, man? 181 00:07:28,234 --> 00:07:31,403 I am feeling feelings that I have never felt before, Will. 182 00:07:31,437 --> 00:07:34,406 I mean, I know that we just met. This girl understands me. 183 00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:35,841 Or that could just be the language barrier. 184 00:07:35,875 --> 00:07:39,411 I'm really happy for you, bud, but we had our whole "sad cupid" 185 00:07:39,445 --> 00:07:40,946 thing going on. Now you're all coupled up. 186 00:07:40,980 --> 00:07:42,380 What am I supposed to do? 187 00:07:42,415 --> 00:07:44,249 Well, I'm so sorry that happy cupid 188 00:07:44,384 --> 00:07:46,319 has bit me in the ass so hard. 189 00:07:46,353 --> 00:07:48,621 I've seen this whole "feelings" thing, 190 00:07:48,655 --> 00:07:50,323 and there is no turning back, man. 191 00:07:50,357 --> 00:07:54,260 Before you know it, you're gonna have a house, a kid, a dog. 192 00:07:54,294 --> 00:07:56,262 Do you think she would get a dog with me? 193 00:07:56,296 --> 00:07:57,863 Lady Crapsalot? 194 00:07:57,898 --> 00:08:01,834 Look, just do one sad cupid, and then you can go. 195 00:08:01,868 --> 00:08:03,936 One round of sad cupid. 196 00:08:03,971 --> 00:08:04,937 - One. - Right now. 197 00:08:04,972 --> 00:08:06,872 - Okay. - Get sad. 198 00:08:08,275 --> 00:08:09,508 Little bit sadder. 199 00:08:09,543 --> 00:08:10,643 Okay, that's too much. 200 00:08:10,677 --> 00:08:13,679 Hey, can I get a water, please? Thanks. 201 00:08:13,714 --> 00:08:16,882 Sorry to interrupt. I just feel like this is... 202 00:08:16,917 --> 00:08:18,618 This is such a weird night to be out, you know? 203 00:08:18,652 --> 00:08:21,654 I was supposed to stay in, but then I gotta cheer my buddy up. 204 00:08:21,688 --> 00:08:23,422 - I don't know. - How come? 205 00:08:23,457 --> 00:08:24,957 Oh, well, uh... 206 00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:27,260 He's gonna kill me for saying this, but... 207 00:08:27,294 --> 00:08:31,597 What happened was his fiancee just broke off their engagement, 208 00:08:31,632 --> 00:08:33,666 and he's just... 209 00:08:33,700 --> 00:08:35,468 Oh, God, it kills me, he's heartbroken. 210 00:08:35,502 --> 00:08:39,338 Whoo, on Valentine's day, of all days. 211 00:08:39,373 --> 00:08:41,307 - What are the odds? - Yeah, what are the odds? 212 00:08:41,341 --> 00:08:44,677 It's just so horrible, and uh, it wasn't just a breakup, 213 00:08:44,711 --> 00:08:47,947 she cheated on him with his brother. 214 00:08:47,981 --> 00:08:50,049 - [whispers] Twin brother. - That's awful. 215 00:08:50,083 --> 00:08:51,651 Maybe she just couldn't tell them apart. 216 00:08:51,685 --> 00:08:53,886 No, they're fraternal, so that's not what happened, 217 00:08:53,921 --> 00:08:55,454 but thanks for your input. Anyway, 218 00:08:55,489 --> 00:08:57,223 he's such a sensitive guy, you know? 219 00:08:57,257 --> 00:08:59,592 He's really romantic and it's Valentine's day, 220 00:08:59,626 --> 00:09:01,127 and it's just tearing him up. 221 00:09:01,161 --> 00:09:02,662 You're a really good friend. 222 00:09:02,696 --> 00:09:05,531 Stop it, no, I'm just doing what anyone would do, you know? 223 00:09:05,566 --> 00:09:07,400 Anyway, I feel like I'm bringing the energy down. 224 00:09:07,434 --> 00:09:08,467 Can I buy you guys a drink? What are you guys... 225 00:09:08,502 --> 00:09:09,735 What are you drinking? 226 00:09:09,770 --> 00:09:12,872 Cherry cosmopolitans with extra sugar on the rim. 227 00:09:12,906 --> 00:09:15,408 Yes, extra sugar, and take extra time making them. 228 00:09:15,442 --> 00:09:16,776 Yeah, you got it. 229 00:09:16,810 --> 00:09:18,945 You know, this may seem a little bit forward or weird, 230 00:09:18,979 --> 00:09:22,615 but maybe one of you could go over there and just talk to him, 231 00:09:22,649 --> 00:09:23,950 maybe try to cheer him up a little bit? 232 00:09:23,984 --> 00:09:26,052 On the way over he was saying how 233 00:09:26,086 --> 00:09:27,853 he doesn't know if he'll ever love again. 234 00:09:27,888 --> 00:09:30,923 Said something about closing his heart off forever. 235 00:09:30,958 --> 00:09:33,493 I think he changed his mind. 236 00:09:36,964 --> 00:09:39,465 Drink up! 237 00:09:39,499 --> 00:09:40,466 [man in movie] You didn't tell me 238 00:09:40,500 --> 00:09:41,901 the Vicar was coming. 239 00:09:41,935 --> 00:09:43,536 We're going to be the laughingstock of the village! 240 00:09:43,570 --> 00:09:46,105 - [knocking on door] - 'Ello, it's me, the Vicar! 241 00:09:46,139 --> 00:09:47,340 - [laugh track] - It's always nutty 242 00:09:47,374 --> 00:09:48,808 when the Vicar comes. 243 00:09:48,842 --> 00:09:52,345 Yeah, nutty. 244 00:09:52,379 --> 00:09:55,681 I'll be right back. 245 00:09:55,716 --> 00:09:57,450 This is a disaster of epic proportions. 246 00:09:57,484 --> 00:09:58,618 What happened? 247 00:09:58,652 --> 00:10:00,353 - I need Will. - Oh, no, no, no... I can help. 248 00:10:00,387 --> 00:10:02,488 I'm excellent in disasters. You know, last year I brought 249 00:10:02,523 --> 00:10:04,991 joy to a small African village that was ravaged by dysentery... 250 00:10:05,025 --> 00:10:06,192 Okay, do I look like a guy 251 00:10:06,226 --> 00:10:08,628 who has time for fricking fairy tales? 252 00:10:08,662 --> 00:10:10,229 Fairy tale? It happened last year. 253 00:10:10,264 --> 00:10:11,831 Will? Will, I need your help. 254 00:10:11,865 --> 00:10:13,599 Valentine's day is a disaster. 255 00:10:13,634 --> 00:10:15,268 No, I'm kind of busy right now, buddy. 256 00:10:15,302 --> 00:10:17,570 Shea said, "don't do anything for Valentine's day," 257 00:10:17,604 --> 00:10:19,739 so I didn't. But now she's here, 258 00:10:19,741 --> 00:10:21,474 and she seems really mad. 259 00:10:21,508 --> 00:10:23,609 S- oh, boy.. Classic girl behavior, 260 00:10:23,644 --> 00:10:25,511 the old "I hate Valentine's day" routine. 261 00:10:25,546 --> 00:10:27,580 - I am so confused. - Just trust me, 262 00:10:27,614 --> 00:10:30,416 it's best to just have presents on you at all times. 263 00:10:30,450 --> 00:10:32,518 I don't have anything. I'm screwed! 264 00:10:32,553 --> 00:10:34,120 Marcus, I can help, if you'd like. 265 00:10:34,154 --> 00:10:35,454 - Shh! - All right, well, you've come 266 00:10:35,489 --> 00:10:37,190 to the right guy. Take a deep breath. 267 00:10:37,224 --> 00:10:38,424 I want you to go through the dumbwaiter, 268 00:10:38,459 --> 00:10:41,060 up my stairs to my bedroom. 269 00:10:41,094 --> 00:10:42,428 Marcus! 270 00:10:43,897 --> 00:10:48,734 In my closet on the left, there are three drawers, okay? 271 00:10:48,769 --> 00:10:50,503 This is my present closet. It's for emergencies 272 00:10:50,537 --> 00:10:51,637 just like this. 273 00:10:51,672 --> 00:10:53,739 You have a closet full of presents, Will? 274 00:10:53,774 --> 00:10:57,076 Presents from groupies, presents for groupes, 275 00:10:57,110 --> 00:10:59,312 swag, stuff like that. Oh, wait, wait... hey, Marcus? 276 00:10:59,346 --> 00:11:02,615 Do not... I repeat... do not open the top drawer, okay? 277 00:11:02,649 --> 00:11:04,650 Under any circumstances, no top drawer. 278 00:11:04,685 --> 00:11:06,852 Okay, TJ, no, no, no, hold on! Marcus, I gotta go. 279 00:11:06,887 --> 00:11:08,988 - So I can take anything? - You know what, Marcus? 280 00:11:09,022 --> 00:11:10,456 I'm not sure any of this stuff is right. 281 00:11:10,490 --> 00:11:12,858 Do not open the top drawer! I could get arrested. 282 00:11:12,893 --> 00:11:14,093 Okay, bye, Will. 283 00:11:14,127 --> 00:11:15,728 Alligator? No. 284 00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,730 [muttering] 285 00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:19,165 - What's this? - Ah! Okay, then. 286 00:11:19,199 --> 00:11:21,100 Let's... let's put this away. All right. 287 00:11:21,134 --> 00:11:23,102 - We're gonna get out of here. - No, no, TJ! 288 00:11:23,136 --> 00:11:26,906 Yeah, sorry, man, but Chloe is really tired, it's jet lag. 289 00:11:26,940 --> 00:11:29,075 That just means you're going to have sex. 290 00:11:29,109 --> 00:11:30,509 - Bye, sad cupid. - Bye. 291 00:11:30,544 --> 00:11:32,078 You don't even know what that means. 292 00:11:32,112 --> 00:11:33,112 Yo! 293 00:11:36,717 --> 00:11:39,819 I see. 294 00:11:39,853 --> 00:11:41,287 - Sympathy pour. - Mmhmm. 295 00:11:41,321 --> 00:11:45,157 That was, just so you know, not my best game, okay? 296 00:11:45,192 --> 00:11:48,961 My wingman takes off... just, don't judge me based on that. 297 00:11:48,996 --> 00:11:51,497 - Okay? - Hey, I get it. 298 00:11:51,532 --> 00:11:54,400 Come to the bar on Valentine's day, 299 00:11:54,434 --> 00:11:57,003 the easiest day of the year to pick up desperate women. 300 00:11:57,037 --> 00:11:59,205 "Maybe me and my buddy Will do a little routine. 301 00:11:59,239 --> 00:12:01,140 We call it 'sad Valentine.'" 302 00:12:01,174 --> 00:12:03,009 "sad cupid," thank you very much. 303 00:12:03,043 --> 00:12:04,977 Oh, excuse me. 304 00:12:05,012 --> 00:12:07,280 You know what? I'm gonna help you out. 305 00:12:13,053 --> 00:12:15,664 - What are you doing? - Just let it happen, sad cupid. 306 00:12:27,067 --> 00:12:28,968 Whoa. Thank you very much. 307 00:12:29,002 --> 00:12:31,437 Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing? 308 00:12:33,841 --> 00:12:36,042 - She wants me to go over there. - Sit down. 309 00:12:36,076 --> 00:12:39,645 She has guys bringing her drinks and coming over to hit on her 310 00:12:39,680 --> 00:12:41,914 all night. You're gonna stay put, 311 00:12:41,949 --> 00:12:45,051 and make her come to you. 312 00:12:45,085 --> 00:12:48,087 Trust me. I know things. 313 00:12:51,024 --> 00:12:52,925 [whispers] What? 314 00:12:59,890 --> 00:13:02,825 Whoa, no one's ever given me a Teddy bear before. 315 00:13:02,860 --> 00:13:04,661 I know you said you didn't want anything 316 00:13:04,695 --> 00:13:06,496 for Valentine's day, but I, uh, 317 00:13:06,530 --> 00:13:07,964 I wanted to get you something anyway. 318 00:13:07,998 --> 00:13:10,433 Kinda thought you weren't going to. 319 00:13:10,467 --> 00:13:12,402 What should I name it? 320 00:13:12,436 --> 00:13:14,771 I know. Pasty. [chuckles] 321 00:13:14,805 --> 00:13:16,339 "Press here for message." 322 00:13:16,373 --> 00:13:18,307 No, uh, don't play that... 323 00:13:18,342 --> 00:13:19,309 Uh, right now. 324 00:13:19,343 --> 00:13:22,545 I mean, you can save it for later. 325 00:13:22,579 --> 00:13:23,746 Woman's voice: Hi, Will, it's Jade. 326 00:13:23,781 --> 00:13:26,883 Happy Birthday. I wuv you and I want you. 327 00:13:26,917 --> 00:13:29,018 Can't wait to see you tonight, honey bear. 328 00:13:29,053 --> 00:13:32,388 You re-gifted this present. You just stole it from Will's. 329 00:13:32,423 --> 00:13:34,223 Let's see if you wuv having no head. 330 00:13:34,258 --> 00:13:35,825 - [voice running down] - Hi, Will, it's Jade. 331 00:13:35,859 --> 00:13:38,194 Happy Birthday... [deep so-mo voice] 332 00:13:38,228 --> 00:13:40,063 I'll be right back. 333 00:13:40,097 --> 00:13:43,166 Yeah, so in love. Yeah, see that? Totally. 334 00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:46,069 - Yeah. - Okay, do them. 335 00:13:46,103 --> 00:13:47,870 All right. That's a first date, 336 00:13:47,905 --> 00:13:51,974 and she's about to try to fake a phone call so she can leave. 337 00:13:52,009 --> 00:13:53,309 What? She's totally into him. 338 00:13:53,344 --> 00:13:55,078 No, she's not. She's faking it. 339 00:13:55,112 --> 00:13:56,746 You are so wrong, I feel sorry for you. 340 00:13:56,780 --> 00:13:58,848 All right. 341 00:13:58,883 --> 00:14:01,217 Oh, my God. You're totally right, she just... 342 00:14:01,251 --> 00:14:02,685 How do you... how do you do that, honestly? 343 00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:04,887 It's all in the body language, my friend. 344 00:14:04,922 --> 00:14:06,990 You're like a drunk people clairvoyant. 345 00:14:07,024 --> 00:14:09,025 I just spend a lot of time watching people 346 00:14:09,059 --> 00:14:10,994 hit on other people. It becomes pretty clear. 347 00:14:11,028 --> 00:14:12,729 That's incredible. That's incredible. 348 00:14:12,763 --> 00:14:15,598 You should get a reality show or something. 349 00:14:15,633 --> 00:14:17,100 Must make you kind of jaded, though. 350 00:14:17,134 --> 00:14:18,701 Oh, totally. But, you know, 351 00:14:18,736 --> 00:14:21,304 sometimes people turn out to be better than you thought. 352 00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:23,940 Sometimes they do, don't they? 353 00:14:27,177 --> 00:14:29,979 I have a 12-year-old. 354 00:14:30,014 --> 00:14:31,814 And two jobs. All of that while 355 00:14:31,849 --> 00:14:34,951 trying to finish my college degree, so, trust me. 356 00:14:34,985 --> 00:14:36,219 You're not interested. 357 00:14:36,253 --> 00:14:39,522 I'm just having a drink at a bar here. 358 00:14:41,125 --> 00:14:43,059 Hey. Thanks for that drink. 359 00:14:43,093 --> 00:14:45,762 - I'm Katie. - Hi, yea. 360 00:14:45,796 --> 00:14:47,029 Yeah, you're welcome. 361 00:14:47,064 --> 00:14:49,098 I kind of kept waiting for you to come over. 362 00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:51,868 I'm actually heading out right now, so... 363 00:14:51,902 --> 00:14:53,002 I'm meeting up with some friends. 364 00:14:53,037 --> 00:14:54,704 Would you want to catch up with us? 365 00:14:54,738 --> 00:14:57,874 - Since I owe you a drink. - Oh, um... 366 00:14:57,908 --> 00:15:00,143 Uh, yeah, that sounds cool. 367 00:15:00,177 --> 00:15:01,377 We're going to be going to club 41, 368 00:15:01,412 --> 00:15:02,779 and it's a cat party. 369 00:15:02,813 --> 00:15:05,415 Club 41, and it's a cat party. Got it, yeah. 370 00:15:05,449 --> 00:15:07,317 I actually... I love cat parties. 371 00:15:07,351 --> 00:15:08,918 All right. 372 00:15:08,952 --> 00:15:10,420 What the hell is a cat party? 373 00:15:10,454 --> 00:15:11,587 - [laughs] - Please? 374 00:15:11,622 --> 00:15:13,756 They hold them at that club once a month. 375 00:15:13,791 --> 00:15:16,559 It's like a regular party, but you can't get in unless 376 00:15:16,593 --> 00:15:17,794 you're dressed like a cat. 377 00:15:17,828 --> 00:15:19,262 Stop it right now. You're messing with me. 378 00:15:19,296 --> 00:15:20,463 - Nope, I'm not. - Don't mess with me. 379 00:15:20,497 --> 00:15:22,799 I'm not, and I know, because at 1:00 am, 380 00:15:22,833 --> 00:15:25,535 a bunch of college kids stumble in here like cats, 381 00:15:25,569 --> 00:15:27,904 all whiskers and desperation. 382 00:15:27,938 --> 00:15:31,040 What have I got myself into? Okay, cat party? 383 00:15:31,075 --> 00:15:32,575 Cat costume? I can do this. 384 00:15:32,609 --> 00:15:34,844 - Have fun. - Thank you. 385 00:15:34,878 --> 00:15:36,646 Hey, uh... 386 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:37,780 What would you have... 387 00:15:37,815 --> 00:15:38,848 What would you have said about me? 388 00:15:38,882 --> 00:15:40,216 What do you mean? 389 00:15:40,250 --> 00:15:42,218 You know, the game we were playing, analyzing people, 390 00:15:42,252 --> 00:15:43,453 you know, why they're at the bar. 391 00:15:43,487 --> 00:15:45,288 What would you have said about me? 392 00:15:45,322 --> 00:15:47,724 Oh, well, just that you've had your heart broken. 393 00:15:47,758 --> 00:15:50,159 - What? Why? - Well, 'cause, 394 00:15:50,194 --> 00:15:52,328 otherwise you wouldn't be hitting on 22-year-olds 395 00:15:52,363 --> 00:15:56,099 when everyone around you is grown up. 396 00:15:56,133 --> 00:16:00,136 But, hey, I'm just guessing. What do I know, right? 397 00:16:00,170 --> 00:16:03,506 Okay, I am going to go procure a cat costume. 398 00:16:03,540 --> 00:16:05,241 It was very nice to meet you... 399 00:16:05,275 --> 00:16:08,544 - Liz. - Nice to meet you, Liz. 400 00:16:13,050 --> 00:16:14,217 Marcus, talk to me. 401 00:16:14,251 --> 00:16:15,518 She hated the Teddy bear I gave her. 402 00:16:15,552 --> 00:16:17,186 Well, look, maybe what you're looking for 403 00:16:17,221 --> 00:16:20,023 isn't in Will's present closet. 404 00:16:20,057 --> 00:16:21,391 Of course it is. 405 00:16:21,425 --> 00:16:25,628 Will's present closet has literally everything. 406 00:16:25,663 --> 00:16:27,563 Do you think shea would like a fish? 407 00:16:27,598 --> 00:16:29,565 Of course she wouldn't like a fish... fish aren't romantic! 408 00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:30,767 I'm gonna have to go to the top drawer. 409 00:16:30,801 --> 00:16:32,869 No, Marc... all right. Here, Marcus, stand up. 410 00:16:32,903 --> 00:16:34,971 - What? - Listen. 411 00:16:35,005 --> 00:16:37,040 I may not be Will, but I do have some experience 412 00:16:37,074 --> 00:16:38,274 with this sort of thing. 413 00:16:38,309 --> 00:16:40,276 You don't want to give Shea just any old gift, 414 00:16:40,311 --> 00:16:41,844 'cause she's not just any old girl. 415 00:16:41,879 --> 00:16:44,414 She's unique and special, and so the gift that you give her, 416 00:16:44,448 --> 00:16:46,115 well, that also has to be unique and special. 417 00:16:46,150 --> 00:16:47,717 You gotta put some thought into this. 418 00:16:47,751 --> 00:16:49,886 I don't have time to go to a store and get her something 419 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:52,221 - unique and special! - Listen to me. 420 00:16:52,256 --> 00:16:53,756 Deep cleansing breath, right now. 421 00:16:53,791 --> 00:16:55,158 [breathes in deeply] 422 00:16:55,192 --> 00:16:56,359 [exhales] [coughs] 423 00:16:56,393 --> 00:16:58,761 Go downstairs, tell her you need 10 minutes. 424 00:16:58,796 --> 00:17:00,330 You got this. Go, go, go, go. 425 00:17:00,364 --> 00:17:02,365 Okay. 426 00:17:06,437 --> 00:17:08,271 All right, third drawer. 427 00:17:08,305 --> 00:17:09,972 Unsee, unsee, unsee. 428 00:17:11,940 --> 00:17:14,742 [loud electronic dance music] 429 00:17:27,876 --> 00:17:29,577 - You made it! - Yeah, I did. 430 00:17:29,612 --> 00:17:31,079 - Awesome. - This is, uh, crazy. 431 00:17:31,113 --> 00:17:32,647 Yeah. This is Michelle. 432 00:17:32,681 --> 00:17:33,648 - Hey, Michelle. - Sarah. 433 00:17:33,682 --> 00:17:34,816 - Hey, Sarah. - And Jess. 434 00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:36,351 - Hey, Jess. - Can I buy you a drink? 435 00:17:36,385 --> 00:17:37,419 Uh, no, I'll buy the drinks. 436 00:17:37,453 --> 00:17:38,720 No, I owe you a drink. 437 00:17:38,754 --> 00:17:40,321 Besides, my dad pays my credit card bills, 438 00:17:40,356 --> 00:17:42,390 so it totally doesn't even matter. 439 00:17:42,424 --> 00:17:45,126 It doesn't... doesn't... Doesn't matter. 440 00:17:45,161 --> 00:17:46,561 Oh! Watch it. 441 00:17:46,595 --> 00:17:49,764 - Sorry, bro. - It's okay, man. 442 00:17:49,798 --> 00:17:53,334 Dude, can you just dance maybe a little bit over there? 443 00:17:53,369 --> 00:17:54,402 You want to dance? 444 00:17:54,436 --> 00:17:55,603 Yeah, yeah, I love to dance. 445 00:17:55,638 --> 00:17:57,138 Could we just get away from garfield? 446 00:17:57,173 --> 00:17:58,139 He's a little bit of a douche. 447 00:17:58,174 --> 00:18:00,375 - What? - Garfield's a douche! 448 00:18:00,409 --> 00:18:01,709 Who's garfield? 449 00:18:01,744 --> 00:18:03,578 Ah, never mind. 450 00:18:03,612 --> 00:18:04,879 Isn't this awesome? 451 00:18:04,914 --> 00:18:06,814 - Yeah. - What'd you say, what? 452 00:18:06,849 --> 00:18:08,516 Yeah, it's awesome! 453 00:18:08,551 --> 00:18:09,517 Hey! 454 00:18:09,552 --> 00:18:12,520 [pounding electronic music] 455 00:18:17,826 --> 00:18:19,260 Shea? 456 00:18:19,295 --> 00:18:21,262 What? 457 00:18:21,297 --> 00:18:23,198 I realize the Teddy bear was a terrible gift, 458 00:18:23,232 --> 00:18:25,833 so I've prepared something else for you, 459 00:18:25,868 --> 00:18:27,302 in honor of the first time we met. 460 00:18:27,336 --> 00:18:29,804 If you recall, you blasted Anarchy in the U.K. 461 00:18:29,839 --> 00:18:32,707 over the P.A. system, and while I quivered in fear, 462 00:18:32,741 --> 00:18:35,376 I also thought you were the coolest person I'd ever met. 463 00:18:35,411 --> 00:18:38,479 So please enjoy this chocolate banana milkshake, 464 00:18:38,514 --> 00:18:39,914 your favorite, 465 00:18:39,949 --> 00:18:42,584 and the performance you're about to see. 466 00:18:42,618 --> 00:18:45,253 Mr. Chris? I now give you Marcus Bowa, 467 00:18:45,287 --> 00:18:48,690 presenting his version of Anarchy in the U.K. 468 00:18:48,724 --> 00:18:49,691 [music starts] 469 00:18:49,725 --> 00:18:52,961 I am an anti-Christ-ah 470 00:18:52,995 --> 00:18:56,364 I am an anarchist-ah 471 00:18:56,398 --> 00:19:00,134 Don't know what I want, but I know how to get it 472 00:19:00,169 --> 00:19:03,938 I wanna destroy the passerby 473 00:19:03,973 --> 00:19:09,978 'Cause I wanna be 474 00:19:10,012 --> 00:19:13,548 An anarchist 475 00:19:13,582 --> 00:19:19,187 Destroy 476 00:19:19,752 --> 00:19:22,320 [panting] 477 00:19:22,355 --> 00:19:24,690 That was so stupid. 478 00:19:24,724 --> 00:19:26,491 Stupid in a good way? 479 00:19:26,526 --> 00:19:28,927 I guess. [chuckles] 480 00:19:28,961 --> 00:19:30,750 [laughs] 481 00:19:30,788 --> 00:19:32,955 - Oh, hi, mom. - Nice one, little punk. 482 00:19:32,990 --> 00:19:35,024 Thanks. Mr. Chris helped. 483 00:19:35,059 --> 00:19:36,426 Is it okay if we go to my room? 484 00:19:36,460 --> 00:19:38,094 I want to show Shea the music video. 485 00:19:38,128 --> 00:19:40,363 We copied it directly. I think we did pretty good. 486 00:19:40,397 --> 00:19:42,265 Yeah. Door's open, though. 487 00:19:42,299 --> 00:19:44,434 Of course. My room gets stuffy otherwise. 488 00:19:44,468 --> 00:19:46,135 - Thanks, Mr. Chris. - Any time. 489 00:19:47,137 --> 00:19:48,738 How was it? 490 00:19:48,772 --> 00:19:50,940 It was amazing. 491 00:19:50,975 --> 00:19:53,042 I mean, the doctor asked me to leave the room 492 00:19:53,077 --> 00:19:55,878 quite a few times. He didn't like the flute 493 00:19:55,913 --> 00:19:58,781 or the ukulele, really. 494 00:19:58,816 --> 00:20:00,917 Thanks for looking after Marcus, and... 495 00:20:00,951 --> 00:20:03,519 Sorry we didn't get to spend Valentine's day together. 496 00:20:03,554 --> 00:20:05,288 Well, there's still two hours left. 497 00:20:05,322 --> 00:20:08,791 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 498 00:20:08,826 --> 00:20:10,793 Flute and uke jam sesh? 499 00:20:10,828 --> 00:20:14,030 You are a wondrous and romantic man. 500 00:20:16,350 --> 00:20:17,840 Happy Valentine's day. 501 00:20:25,930 --> 00:20:28,209 Uh... Is Liz still here? 502 00:20:31,005 --> 00:20:32,495 - Hello. - Hey. 503 00:20:32,971 --> 00:20:34,888 What happened with the cat party? 504 00:20:34,913 --> 00:20:37,255 Uh, well... I'm more of a dog party guy. 505 00:20:37,293 --> 00:20:38,433 - Oh. - Yeah. 506 00:20:40,971 --> 00:20:42,236 So, what are you doing here? 507 00:20:42,311 --> 00:20:44,866 Well, uh... I just wanted to tell you that 508 00:20:44,904 --> 00:20:46,745 don't let it go over your head, but... 509 00:20:46,776 --> 00:20:48,467 - You were right. - Hmmm. 510 00:20:48,492 --> 00:20:50,308 I did have my heart broken. 511 00:20:51,013 --> 00:20:52,378 So, uh... 512 00:20:53,092 --> 00:20:54,883 Guess I'm the guy here at 1:00 A.M., 513 00:20:54,934 --> 00:20:56,938 all whiskers and desperation. 514 00:20:56,963 --> 00:20:58,591 You still have some whiskers. 515 00:21:03,498 --> 00:21:07,331 Sync and corrections by madhatters www.addic7ed.com 516 00:21:07,381 --> 00:21:11,931 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38585

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