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1
00:00:32,332 --> 00:00:34,232
Bobby, honey, don't worry.
2
00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:38,567
Going to your grandmother's
for your birthday is gonna be great!
3
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:41,168
Let's just get this over with.
4
00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:44,301
What's the matter?
Aren't you excited to fly to Arizona?
5
00:00:44,411 --> 00:00:46,402
They got the Grand Canyon there.
6
00:00:46,513 --> 00:00:48,447
Of course,
you won't be seeing it, but...
7
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:52,918
No. Because Grandma thinks,
"Baby Bobby might fall in."
8
00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:57,384
And anyway, she's got coloring books
of the Grand Canyon.
9
00:00:58,492 --> 00:01:01,359
[SINGING]
? This old man came rolling home ?
10
00:01:02,996 --> 00:01:06,022
This is my place, Bobby.
Home sweet home.
11
00:01:06,433 --> 00:01:10,802
Building 42, living space K,
in case we get separated.
12
00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:16,536
I know your birthday's
not for another few days,
13
00:01:16,643 --> 00:01:18,839
but I'm no good at keeping secrets.
14
00:01:18,946 --> 00:01:20,436
Happy birthday.
15
00:01:23,216 --> 00:01:25,344
BOBBY:
A policeman's uniform.
16
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:28,286
"Ages seven and up."
17
00:01:28,388 --> 00:01:31,790
Tillie, Bobby isn't seven years old.
18
00:01:31,992 --> 00:01:33,790
He's what, nine? Ten?
19
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,793
I'll be 13 next week.
20
00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:38,558
Thirteen? You know, in my religion,
21
00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:41,691
13 is your official passage
into manhood.
22
00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:45,030
It's called a bar mitzvah
or "big party."
23
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:49,004
- Is that an Arizona thing?
- Arizona, New York, Miami.
24
00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:51,880
I got so many fancy
pen-and-pencil sets,
25
00:01:51,979 --> 00:01:53,903
I was giving them away for years.
26
00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,776
Pen-and-pencil set?
27
00:01:56,183 --> 00:01:59,710
That is very manly.
Can I get a bar mitzvah?
28
00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:02,387
I'm willing to celebrate Hanukkah.
29
00:02:02,489 --> 00:02:05,925
Trust me, it's more work
than you're gonna wanna put in.
30
00:02:06,026 --> 00:02:09,121
I'll tell you what.
Tomorrow, you spend the day with me,
31
00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:11,891
and I'll show you
how a man enjoys Arizona.
32
00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:15,367
By the time you leave here,
you'll have hair on your kishkas.
33
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,602
What you making, Hank?
34
00:02:18,705 --> 00:02:21,197
Hey, Bill. I'm making a coffin.
35
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:22,900
- A coffin?
- Yep.
36
00:02:23,010 --> 00:02:26,469
I was talking to a client the other day
about forest fires,
37
00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:30,710
and I can't remember exactly
how the conversation turned to coffins.
38
00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:33,985
But, well, long story short,
I got the bug.
39
00:02:34,421 --> 00:02:35,786
Looks nice.
40
00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,792
This is my bachelor pad.
41
00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:43,019
And for the next week,
because you're so old,
42
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:46,623
- it's your bachelor pad.
- My own pad.
43
00:02:49,703 --> 00:02:52,001
I wish my girlfriend was here.
44
00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:54,301
She really likes to sit up.
45
00:02:55,242 --> 00:02:59,008
- So you got yourself a girlfriend?
- Yeah. She's on the left.
46
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:03,612
- She's a little slip of a thing.
- She's got her period already.
47
00:03:04,251 --> 00:03:06,743
Give it 50 years, it'll go away.
48
00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:08,355
Who's the guy?
49
00:03:08,455 --> 00:03:12,619
That's my best friend, Joseph.
He won't be 13 for a few months.
50
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,755
Well, feel free
to give your little friend a call.
51
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,626
I'll give you some privacy.
52
00:03:18,231 --> 00:03:20,461
I almost forgot. Use my cart.
53
00:03:27,908 --> 00:03:30,434
Count Dracula has thousands of coffins.
54
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:33,275
They say he sleeps in a different coffin
every night.
55
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:35,644
I don't know if it's true.
It's just what I heard.
56
00:03:35,749 --> 00:03:37,114
It sounds true.
57
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,777
No, it sounds made-up.
I don't know.
58
00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:41,714
Okay. That should do it.
59
00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:45,281
That is a terrible coffin.
60
00:04:08,615 --> 00:04:12,711
Mr. O'Connor, I'm Bobby Hill.
I live next door to you.
61
00:04:12,886 --> 00:04:17,346
I'm having some people over
tomorrow night, eightish to whenever.
62
00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:20,856
- What can I bring?
- Your appetite and your wife.
63
00:04:21,027 --> 00:04:24,463
And some potato salad
if she brings her appetite.
64
00:04:25,665 --> 00:04:28,635
Honey, do you want butter beans
or lima beans?
65
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:30,533
Are you building a coffin?
66
00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:33,572
Yep. One for me and one for you.
67
00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:43,080
Hank, why doesn't the lid on mine
close all the way?
68
00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:47,411
It does. I mean, it almost closes.
69
00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:49,947
I'll make sure it closes
come the big day.
70
00:04:50,014 --> 00:04:52,358
No, Hank.
You will build me a new one.
71
00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:56,327
Because if you try to stick
the late Peggy Hill in an inferior casket,
72
00:04:56,429 --> 00:04:59,626
she will come back to haunt you.
I will see to it.
73
00:05:06,606 --> 00:05:08,370
"To Mr. Bobby Hill."
74
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:14,043
Yes! Today I am a man!
75
00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:23,617
You know, Joseph is also coming home
today from summer camp.
76
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:25,748
So I thought we'd all go out to dinner.
77
00:05:25,859 --> 00:05:28,328
We're meeting the Gribbles
over at Rattlesnake's.
78
00:05:28,428 --> 00:05:31,090
That's nice. Joseph's a good kid.
79
00:05:31,464 --> 00:05:34,092
I'm planning on taking him
under my wing,
80
00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:35,669
like Garry did with me.
81
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:49,143
- Joseph?
- Hey, Bobby.
82
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:55,215
So, did you grow mostly in a few nights
or evenly throughout the summer?
83
00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:56,950
I don't know.
84
00:05:57,057 --> 00:05:59,822
Hi, I'm Jennifer.
How is everyone tonight?
85
00:05:59,926 --> 00:06:02,452
Jennifer, we're fantastic!
86
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,960
Can I start you out
with something to drink?
87
00:06:06,433 --> 00:06:09,892
No. I'll take the other menu
like my young friend.
88
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,368
Thank you, Jennifer.
89
00:06:11,471 --> 00:06:15,305
Bobby, order off the kid's menu
while you still can. It's cheaper.
90
00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:17,240
- I'll have beer.
- Beer.
91
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:19,141
Beer, Jennifer!
92
00:06:20,447 --> 00:06:22,677
- Let me guess. Beer.
- Who?
93
00:06:22,782 --> 00:06:24,011
- What? Me?
- Him?
94
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:25,607
So, can you believe it?
95
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,551
He must have put six inches on him.
96
00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:30,248
Can you believe it? Hank, can you?
97
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:34,088
- Peggy, can you believe it?
- Well, I have to, Dale.
98
00:06:34,194 --> 00:06:37,960
- I see Joseph right here.
- You got to see it to believe it.
99
00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:40,993
- Well put.
- I could take your order now.
100
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:42,569
- Chicken!
- Sir?
101
00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:44,700
- Chicken.
- Okay.
102
00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:46,162
Son?
103
00:06:47,674 --> 00:06:49,039
The chicken, please.
104
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,238
Is that the Chicken Wing Dings
or the Choo Choo Chicken Fingers?
105
00:06:58,885 --> 00:07:00,216
Choo Choo.
106
00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:07,127
Well, how's my little birthday man?
107
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:10,026
- You notice I said "man."
- You also said "little."
108
00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,531
Bobby, honey,
I know you want an adult party.
109
00:07:12,632 --> 00:07:16,125
And what you need
is a professional disc jockey.
110
00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:20,503
So, guess where I was
from 3:10 until 5:00 today?
111
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:22,409
The Learning Annex.
112
00:07:22,509 --> 00:07:25,206
DJ Spaz taught me
how to really turn it out.
113
00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:26,802
- Mom--
- I learned how to scratch.
114
00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:29,439
- No.
- And cut and wipe--
115
00:07:29,549 --> 00:07:34,248
I was kind of hoping that you and Dad
would stay in the garage during the party.
116
00:07:35,388 --> 00:07:38,585
But I have carried the cake in
12 years in a row.
117
00:07:40,327 --> 00:07:41,624
All right.
118
00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:45,627
It's your father, isn't it?
You know, he will be fine
119
00:07:45,732 --> 00:07:47,530
- if you only want me there, honey--
- Mom!
120
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:51,798
Very well. Let's get your first big mistake
as a teenager out of the way.
121
00:07:55,442 --> 00:07:56,807
Hey, Joseph.
122
00:07:56,910 --> 00:08:00,244
My mom said I could have
a six-foot sub for my party.
123
00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:03,140
I could use a little help taste-testing.
124
00:08:03,249 --> 00:08:08,153
I don't have time for this, Bobby.
I've got a lot of important stuff to stow.
125
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:10,480
It's my 13th birthday.
126
00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:14,919
And if you want me to sneak you
into any PG-13 movies,
127
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:18,153
you had better get on your bike
and help me eat subs!
128
00:08:18,264 --> 00:08:19,493
I said no.
129
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:23,969
BOBBY: So then I asked Joseph
if he wanted to go riding bikes.
130
00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:25,401
And he was all:
131
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,805
"No. I got some things to do
around the house."
132
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:32,244
What's with that?
He went to kids' camp.
133
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:36,646
I'm the one who just spent a week
in a retirement community.
134
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:37,945
You know, Bobby,
135
00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:41,487
there are some days of the month
that I don't like to ride a bike either.
136
00:08:41,588 --> 00:08:43,556
You mean because
you got your period?
137
00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:46,284
- I chose not to use that word.
- Why?
138
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:50,061
- It's a natural, beautiful thing.
- You don't understand.
139
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:51,426
You're not there yet.
140
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,863
You had better check the map, honey!
141
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:56,834
Because I am living in downtown there!
142
00:09:05,245 --> 00:09:08,772
So, fixing up your bike to sell it?
143
00:09:09,682 --> 00:09:14,119
I guess you'll be getting a motorcycle
or a Town Car or something.
144
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,688
[JOSEPH GRUNTS]
145
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:20,426
Yeah. Well, here's an invitation
for my birthday party.
146
00:09:20,627 --> 00:09:23,562
There's gonna be a lot of stuff
you'll like there.
147
00:09:23,663 --> 00:09:27,657
- You know, grown-up stuff like dancing.
- Dancing?
148
00:09:28,268 --> 00:09:30,032
No, I don't think so.
149
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:40,446
What is so funny, Mr. Five-Feet-Ten-Inches
with your fancy armpit hair?
150
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:42,072
I'm guessing.
151
00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:47,046
Joseph, what's going on?
152
00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:51,155
- I can't dance.
- Compared to me, no.
153
00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:55,489
I've got stretch marks on my shoulders
and zits on my back.
154
00:09:56,396 --> 00:09:58,728
I can't even ride my
own bike anymore!
155
00:09:59,165 --> 00:10:01,351
And a million times a day
my dad asks me,
156
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:03,033
"How's the weather up there?"
157
00:10:03,136 --> 00:10:05,935
Tell him it's fair to partly stupid.
158
00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:10,775
Man, you always know just what to say.
159
00:10:11,678 --> 00:10:14,045
That's why you have a girlfriend.
160
00:10:14,380 --> 00:10:16,109
Yeah, I do, don't I?
161
00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:18,947
I want a girl, too! Oh, God!
162
00:10:19,052 --> 00:10:21,316
I just can't stop thinking about them!
163
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:25,016
I can't get girls out of my head!
I just... Just get out!
164
00:10:25,992 --> 00:10:29,792
Come on, Joseph. I told Charise
you were coming to my party,
165
00:10:29,896 --> 00:10:31,990
and she didn't turn me down.
166
00:10:32,098 --> 00:10:34,430
I bet she grew this summer, too.
167
00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:38,102
And she's always been really tall.
168
00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:42,801
- I didn't know you sewed, Hank.
- Sewer!
169
00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:45,004
I am not sewing.
170
00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:49,070
I am upholstering, which is
one of the five original industrial arts.
171
00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:51,276
Whatever you say, Aunt Bee.
172
00:10:51,417 --> 00:10:54,853
While you're at it, maybe you can quilt
one of them coffins for me.
173
00:10:54,954 --> 00:10:58,322
It's only a matter of time
before Joseph's hormonal rage
174
00:10:58,424 --> 00:11:01,826
forces him to kill me in my sleep
and marry my mother.
175
00:11:02,562 --> 00:11:04,929
Anyhoo,
are you gonna button-tuck the folds?
176
00:11:05,031 --> 00:11:07,193
Yeah, man. You know,
needle got a lot of better ways
177
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:09,268
in them dang old...
Button-tucking them folds?
178
00:11:11,471 --> 00:11:12,802
[CONTEMPORARY POP MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
179
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:16,001
Well, I won't be able
to blow out my candles
180
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:19,101
because you just took my breath away.
181
00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,512
Happy birthday, Bobby.
182
00:11:23,716 --> 00:11:26,208
Have you girls seen the new Joseph?
183
00:11:27,053 --> 00:11:28,885
Hey, Alexis. Hi, Stacy.
184
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,930
Oh, Hank. I have carried in
Bobby's birthday cake
185
00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:39,192
for every one of his birthdays.
186
00:11:39,299 --> 00:11:42,234
I am the Cal Ripken of birthday cakes.
187
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:43,697
Now look at me.
188
00:11:43,803 --> 00:11:47,171
Banished to the garage while
Bobby's party goes on without me
189
00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:48,968
or a decent mix tape.
190
00:11:49,075 --> 00:11:51,669
Hey, let's start a new tradition
for Bobby's birthday.
191
00:11:51,778 --> 00:11:54,270
What do you say
you and me just cut loose?
192
00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:58,216
And I ordered pizza.
193
00:12:00,019 --> 00:12:02,283
Come on. I want to
show you something.
194
00:12:05,358 --> 00:12:06,621
Feel that.
195
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,195
It's so plush.
196
00:12:09,295 --> 00:12:12,925
Well, it better be.
It's silk stuffed with Canadian goose down.
197
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:14,727
See, I made yours better than mine.
198
00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:18,737
Mine's just fiberfill left over
from when we insulated the attic.
199
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:30,076
Oh, Hank.
It's like sleeping on a marshmallow.
200
00:12:37,824 --> 00:12:40,452
Come on, J!
Help me bust a move.
201
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,973
Sorry. I just... Sorry.
202
00:12:58,911 --> 00:13:00,845
What are you staring at, weirdo?
203
00:13:09,889 --> 00:13:13,826
Where are you going?
I totally hooked you up with Charise.
204
00:13:13,926 --> 00:13:15,728
Why didn't you put the moves on her?
205
00:13:15,812 --> 00:13:18,159
I don't have any moves, Bobby.
206
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:21,763
Okay. I like working
with a clean slate.
207
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:25,101
Come learn moves from the master.
208
00:13:28,541 --> 00:13:32,978
As promised,
I present to you the VIP sub.
209
00:13:36,716 --> 00:13:39,651
Hey, your hands are really soft.
210
00:13:39,786 --> 00:13:41,345
I have a new soap.
211
00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:45,049
Well, you must be using it
on your face, too,
212
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,855
because your skin is beautiful.
213
00:13:48,094 --> 00:13:51,530
What are you talking about?
My face is all broken out.
214
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:55,768
- Hey, did you kiss me today?
- What?
215
00:13:55,935 --> 00:13:57,096
Enjoy.
216
00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,669
Bobby! Joseph is right here!
217
00:14:03,776 --> 00:14:06,006
So? Maybe he'll learn something.
218
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:08,479
Bobby, you did this
so Joseph could watch?
219
00:14:08,581 --> 00:14:10,015
You're such a creep!
220
00:14:10,116 --> 00:14:11,083
Oops.
221
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:12,674
Time of the month.
222
00:14:13,586 --> 00:14:16,146
Hey, don't blame you
being a jerk on my...
223
00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:18,954
Which I'm not about to talk
to either of you about,
224
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:21,857
and which I am not even having anyway
because of track!
225
00:14:26,999 --> 00:14:28,865
Joseph likes to watch.
226
00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:31,193
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
227
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:33,238
Use doorbell, you idiot!
228
00:14:34,907 --> 00:14:36,705
Connie, it's for you.
229
00:14:37,076 --> 00:14:39,204
If it's Bobby,
slam the door in his face!
230
00:14:39,312 --> 00:14:43,340
I wish it was so I could.
But it just Jolly Gribble Giant.
231
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:46,541
What is it now? Did you come here
to watch me do my homework?
232
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:49,121
I just wanted to say
it was all my fault.
233
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,283
I mean, Bobby did it
to help me 'cause...
234
00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:55,456
I'm such a... Oh, man!
235
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,296
I'm not good with girls.
236
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:01,562
You can't be any worse than Bobby.
237
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:03,897
The way he tried to
kiss me in front of...
238
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:06,665
- Well, you were there.
- Anyways, I'm sorry.
239
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:08,207
So, see you. Bye.
240
00:15:08,307 --> 00:15:09,502
Ow!
241
00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:10,770
Idiot!
242
00:15:12,011 --> 00:15:14,708
No, you're not.
I don't think you're an idiot.
243
00:15:23,022 --> 00:15:27,084
Connie, I rehearsed an apology.
But I'm gonna throw it away,
244
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:30,823
because nothing says "I'm sorry"
like "I'm sorry."
245
00:15:31,664 --> 00:15:34,292
Connie, I rehearsed an apology. But...
246
00:15:45,311 --> 00:15:46,779
[BOBBY AND JOSEPH GRUNT]
247
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:48,777
Bobby, are you okay?
248
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,117
- Ow!
- Bobby!
249
00:15:52,518 --> 00:15:55,749
If my hand didn't hurt so much,
I'd do it again.
250
00:15:56,088 --> 00:15:57,715
What the hell?
251
00:15:58,357 --> 00:15:59,552
CONNIE:
Stop it!
252
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:01,861
I'm bleeding!
253
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:05,222
Oh, look at you.
You grow like bamboo.
254
00:16:05,598 --> 00:16:09,228
- Hey, what happened to his nose?
- I took care of business.
255
00:16:09,435 --> 00:16:11,062
Me and my hammer.
256
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,072
We'd better get some ice on that
257
00:16:13,156 --> 00:16:15,832
before you bleed all over
the hand-loomed kilim.
258
00:16:16,943 --> 00:16:20,470
- What were you doing, Connie?
- I don't know. It just...
259
00:16:21,914 --> 00:16:24,315
I think you'd better calm down.
260
00:16:25,218 --> 00:16:27,152
How can I calm down?
261
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:31,981
You were kissing Joseph!
You are not allowed to kiss Joseph!
262
00:16:32,124 --> 00:16:34,650
I can kiss whoever I want, Bobby.
263
00:16:35,061 --> 00:16:38,520
So I guess you're dating Joseph now,
is that it?
264
00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:41,601
Well, maybe I wanted to kiss a guy
with a mustache.
265
00:16:41,701 --> 00:16:43,692
And maybe I didn't
want to wait for you.
266
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:46,272
What? I made you!
267
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:50,475
You were just a dumb "A" student
until I hit the scene!
268
00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:53,806
Why would you... I just don't...
That does it!
269
00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:56,239
I am breaking up with you.
270
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:01,248
[BOBBY GRUNTS]
271
00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:07,384
Oh, that's right. You blew it!
272
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:08,886
Jerk!
273
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:10,719
[BOBBY EXCLAIMS]
274
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:13,663
That little hillbilly
pack quite a wallop.
275
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:17,998
- You want some naproxen?
- No, I'm okay.
276
00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:22,698
How did tall, dark, and handsome
get butt-kicked by short, fat, and redneck?
277
00:17:25,745 --> 00:17:27,474
[ROMANTIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]
278
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,880
Joseph. What's going on?
279
00:17:36,989 --> 00:17:40,357
Oh, you so cute.
Kahn gonna get a big kick out of this.
280
00:17:40,459 --> 00:17:42,655
Joseph, how could you?
281
00:17:44,430 --> 00:17:45,955
Sorry. I just...
282
00:17:46,465 --> 00:17:48,263
I thought you liked me.
283
00:17:48,534 --> 00:17:50,798
Oh, yeah. You rock my world.
284
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:01,002
What the...
285
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:11,148
Something at the party
must have upset Joseph.
286
00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:13,658
You know, it's an awkward age,
287
00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:15,887
what with acne and whatnot.
288
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:19,463
You think I should get out of my coffin
and see what's going on?
289
00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:21,329
Over my dead body.
290
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,740
I'm sure they're fine.
Pass the chips.
291
00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:32,473
Hey, Joseph.
How's the weather up there?
292
00:18:35,214 --> 00:18:36,306
That's it!
293
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,906
What are you doing here?
294
00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:04,739
I came to apologize
and make out with tongues.
295
00:19:04,844 --> 00:19:06,903
I don't know where
your tongue's been.
296
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:08,742
Oh, wait. Yes, I do.
297
00:19:08,914 --> 00:19:11,975
I didn't mean to kiss Joseph.
It was just that...
298
00:19:12,451 --> 00:19:15,352
He was so sad and tall.
299
00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:18,321
And you're so loose and cheap.
300
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:23,789
Connie, wait!
301
00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:30,361
Where are you going?
302
00:19:30,469 --> 00:19:32,301
I'm going as far as...
303
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:35,340
an eighth of a tank
of gas'll get me.
304
00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:37,034
Take me with you.
305
00:19:40,212 --> 00:19:42,704
What are you doing
with my woman?
306
00:19:42,815 --> 00:19:45,477
- I'm not your property!
- Leave us alone.
307
00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:54,525
I said I was sorry.
So let's do tongues now.
308
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,959
- You're going to French?
- No way!
309
00:19:57,363 --> 00:19:59,195
- You said.
- I did not!
310
00:20:18,517 --> 00:20:20,076
DALE:
Oh, no!
311
00:20:23,122 --> 00:20:25,181
My Bug-a-Bago!
312
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:29,821
What evil hath been wrought
to befall this upon me?
313
00:20:31,630 --> 00:20:33,155
Who did this?
314
00:20:33,265 --> 00:20:36,860
- I don't know, Dale.
- Was it you?
315
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:43,671
Let me... I wanna...
316
00:20:43,776 --> 00:20:47,303
Calm down, Dale. Maybe one
of these kids saw something.
317
00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:50,082
Bobby, did you see who did this?
318
00:20:54,353 --> 00:20:56,981
It was probably teenagers.
319
00:20:59,225 --> 00:21:02,092
- Yep. Teenagers.
- Teenagers.
320
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,290
Damn teenagers!
321
00:21:10,603 --> 00:21:12,731
I guess you're off the hook.
322
00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:15,136
But don't leave town.
323
00:21:21,046 --> 00:21:23,037
Who wants birthday cake?
324
00:21:24,016 --> 00:21:27,077
Yes! Thirteen for 13!
325
00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:29,682
In your face, boy!
326
00:21:30,856 --> 00:21:33,553
[RAPPING]
? Hey, Bobby, it's your birthday ?
327
00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:38,424
? That's right, I served you cake
I'm Peggy, pull your leggy ?
328
00:21:38,531 --> 00:21:41,057
? Oh, Bobby, let's go
Say what? ?
329
00:21:41,167 --> 00:21:43,795
? That's right
I'm all that, I'm Peggy! ?
330
00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:46,499
? Get funky ?
331
00:22:25,845 --> 00:22:28,337
DALE:
Jennifer, we're fantastic!
332
00:22:28,387 --> 00:22:32,937
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