All language subtitles for Pravo nevidljivo.2023

Cattle... cattle calls.
I hate cattle calls.

Lighten up, Norman.

Think of all the actors
out there who would kill

just to be able to audition for

the laughing voice of the
roly-poly pizza dough boy.

Will you please not mention food

when you have a catering
job on the same day?

But it's at Frederick Wolfe's place.

Producer of I'm Alright, You're All Dead?

Demon rapist around the mulberry bush?

I'm looking forward to it.

Paul, it's not like we'll be
invited guests, you know.

We're cleaning out his
sink, for Christ's sake.

Well, still, a party like this...

Don't forget, when they
discovered Marilyn Monroe,

she was just a waitress.

Yeah, with an incredible set of knockers.

Speaking of which, how's Rachel?

Real pleasant, Paul.

I don't know. She said she
had a big surprise for me

tonight when I got home.

So what are you complaining about?

You've got a beautiful girlfriend

who provides you with support,

sex, and a rent-free apartment.

You've got a great-paying side job,

and you've got an
audition in a few moments.

Cheer up and start laughing.

Norman Parent, you're next.

Rachel?

Norman, I didn't know you
were auditioning here today.

Hey, Norman, I've heard a lot about you.

No hard feelings, I hope.

It happens to the best of us.

I tell you what, I'll help
you move out of your bed

if you help me move in mine.

So the surprise is you're dumping me?

I think of it so much as a
dump, more like an exchange.

And what do I get in exchange?

Dumped.

Look, I want to see you here. I
hate emotional people. Come on.

Hey, good luck in there, dude.

They're waiting to hear
you laugh, Mr. Parent.

Champagne.

Ruth, trust me, it's a good role.

Russell, here's the
author. Just tell her about it.

It's called Afterlife. It's a
ghost story with an edge.

Yeah. Ghost meets basic instinct.

Exactly.

All right.

Get one for me, too.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

A nuclear bomb was
accidentally detonated in Kansas.

We should be getting
the fallout any time now.

Aliens landed and impregnated
the Statue of Liberty this afternoon.

Rachel broke a nail.

Rachel? What?

What? What? Did you say
something about Rachel?

This is pitiful, Norman. She's just a girl.

Incredibly good-looking girl.

But beauty only gets you so
far. Then it helps to have money.

Which she has.

And a fantastic apartment.

But still, you take away the
looks, the money, the living

conditions, the companionship,
and what are you left with?

Nothing.

That wasn't exactly what I meant.

Hey, boys. Did you hear the
latest one about the two waiters?

They were fired for not doing their job.

Isn't that a scream?

Fired. Thrown out on the street. No pay.

Sorry, Mr. Morse. I've just
been having a really bad day.

Not to worry. Things will get
much, much worse. Trust me.

Julian.

Oh, yes. Mr. Wolfe.

May I say that this is a
lovely party, and I know that

your next film will be as
successful as your last film.

Tell it to my accountant.

I need some wine.

There are three bottles of Chateau
Lafitte Rothschild in the cellar.

Oh, yes, sir. Very good, sir.

Right away, sir.

So, what's the picture about, Fred?

Well, it's probably about ten million
over budget, but what can you do?

No. I meant the storyline.

Damned if I know. I'm not the writer.

He's around here somewhere.
A stupid-looking kid.

Hi.

Yes, Becky.

You're gonna be a big star.

Best performance I've
seen since last year's Oscars.

Oh, harder, deeper.

More..

You're so right together.

You're so good.

Oh yeah.

Oh, yes.

More.

Moron!

And that's to let you
know that we're through,

and I don't want you touching me
and your fantasies anymore, either.

I belong to Buck now.

Surf's up. Let's ride the wave, babe.

Too cool. Space warrior,
yeah. Dracula compass, and...

Swords of seduction.

The invisible world of Walter
Sinclair, I didn't know he produced this.

The invisibility formula.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.

You seemed to be enjoying yourself
so much, and I didn't want to disturb you.

That's okay. You can
disturb me whenever you like.

That's sweet. Kelly Parkinson.

Norman Perrin.

Um, excuse me. Um, um...

Hors d'oeuvre.

Thank you.

But, you know, you didn't have to
follow me all the way down here.

I was planning on coming
back after they finished.

That didn't come out right.

It's okay. You don't have
to explain to me. I mean...

No, wait. Listen.

I heard about this wonderful
collection and came down to check it out.

When I went to leave, I
realized they were a bit

busy and probably wouldn't
appreciate my cameo,

so I decided to hang
out here until I finished.

How very considerate of you.

Well, I'm trying to break the
stereotypical spying actress mold.

How about you?

I'm an actress myself.

I mean, aspiring asshole.

Actor.

I'm an actor.

Can we start this conversation again?

That's right, Norman. You
just keep on talking and talking,

because as of this moment, you are fired.

But, um...

Oh, no. Please. Listen.

Norman was just down
here trying to serve me.

Yes, I bet he was.

Now, Mr. Perrin, I want
you to hand in your uniform.

You are out of a job.

I'm so sorry. Listen.

I'm gonna go talk to him. I'm
sure I can straighten this out.

No, no, no, don't.

I should have known
this was gonna happen

when I went to open my
fortune cookie at lunch

and there was no fortune inside.

It's just the end of a perfect day.

Wait here. I'm going to take care of this.

Should read the imploding
world of Norman Perrin.

Shit!

Oh, thank God! Shit!

Oh, no!

Oh, man. Stop! Stop!
Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!

Oh, shit!

Kelly, come on. I want to
introduce you to Frederick.

Who?

The executive producer of the film.

Well, then maybe
you'd like to zip up first.

Afterlife. It's a catchy title.

You know, I produced my last five
films based on their names alone.

Fred!

Hell of a party!

Robert, how the hell are you?

Nam good.

Oh, uh, this is, uh, Kelly Parkinson,
another aspiring actress I represent.

An actress? That would
have been my third guess.

Parkinson? Like the disease?

Pleased to meet you, Mr. Wolf.

Yes. I'm Drew Darwin, the film's director.

I'm Ruth Knight.

Yes, I know. I've seen many
of your films, Miss Knight.

Thank you. It's nice to be seen.

I bet it is.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Okay.

Oh, my God.

Ooh, time to disappear. Stage right.

What is happening to me?

Houston, we have a problem here.

Dinner is served.

I'm glad you're all here.

Please, sit.

Oh, boy. Okay, I gotta get out of here.

Having car keys would help.

This is so cool.

No one can see me.

Well, the script is about a
woman who seduces a man

and then kills him.

However, his spirit comes back to haunt her

when she tries to kill again.

Is there a lot of sex?

I'm really good at sex.

Oh, really?

Just ask my agent.

Paul, I need your car keys.

Norman?

I fired the moron, remember?

Now keep pouring or you're next.

Oh, that's it.

Time for a little moron revenge.

This is the kind of thing
that's gonna make you mad,

is what you think.

I've been hearing.

You're over-spoken.

Fill this glass.

I'll even go rented.

Thank you very much.

You're not all straight.

Finish pouring the rest. I'll get the soup.

Oh, my God.

Some strange thing is going on in here.

It's been healthy, Stan.

Something smell like butterscotch?

That's it. Enjoy my body.

It's all yours, now that
I've dumped Norman.

Oh, you are the best.

I know. But I feel kind of bad for Norman.

He doesn't stand a chance of
finding anybody half as good as me.

Right.

Oh, hi.

Norman, what the hell
do you think you're doing?

Hi, Rachel. Don't mind us.

This is my new girlfriend, Kelly.

She's pretty nice, huh?

She's like that type.

Nicer breasts than yours.

Yeah, well, I have a nicer ass.

Oh, I wouldn't be too sure about that.

Oh, Norman. Oh, you
feel so good inside of me.

Buck, tell them how good I feel.

Good evening, and welcome to
the second annual Erotic Olympics.

We've got two wonderful
couples competing here tonight,

and we'll see what they
have in store for us. Bob?

Oh, thanks, Dave. I'm telling you,
you couldn't ask for a better matchup,

because both of these couples really
look like they have something to prove.

Well, yes, I definitely have to say
there's some stiff competition out there,

but I think that Norman and
Kelly are looking pretty good.

I'd have to agree, Dave.
Rachel's got a good rhythm going,

but there seems to be a bit
too much tension in her face.

And actually, that waist
could lose an inch or two.

Which is exactly what she
needs to fill out those breasts.

Quite right, Bob.

Wow, look at them go!

Well, I'm seeing some of the same
old moves that I've seen before.

You would think that they'd come up
with some variation every now and then.

Something a little different.

Well, that's an interesting position.

What do you think, Bob?

Well, Dave, I can't complain.

Oh, it looks like one of
our couples is approaching

the finish line, whether
they want to or not.

I'm gonna...

No, no, yeah, we have to come together!

Ow!

Oh, no! He checked her into the board!

They're definitely going to lose
some points for that one, I'm afraid.

We're not having a crew, anyway.

And the judges agree, a very
low score for Buck and Rachel.

But look at Norman and Kelly go.

They're like poetry in motion.

Oh, yes. Oh, yes.

Wonderful, simply wonderful.

My next trick, try to top this.

Would you look at that!

Like, what if I could, Dave?

Wait, where'd he go?

He didn't go anywhere.

Oh, wow.

Norman Parent has turned invisible.

He has turned invisible, and
he's going for bonus points.

Can you?

Invisible.

Fine.

My buddy.

I don't know about you,
Bob, but I use a cigarette.

I'll join you, Dave.

Do you mind?

Would you check the wheel?

There's nothing blocking it.

I'm nothing, huh?

Okay, you have the right of way.

I guess we'll skip the soup.

You're fired!

What did I do?

What? You just stood there and watched.

You can't fire my friend.

I've never been so
humiliated in all my life!

Just wait. The night's young.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry, Bob.

What is this, some kind of game?

Yeah, it's the I'm standing butt naked

and you can't see me
because I'm invisible game.

Now, where are your car keys?

Oh, wow. I didn't know the
caterers provided floor show, too.

Oh, please.

You're such a buffoon.

Easy, toots. That's my
friend you're talking about.

I got an idea.

Let's all eat naked.

Now, she could give you some
pointers about presentation.

Playing hard to get? Only those so far.

But Robert, that's as far as I go.

Are you sure?

Read my fist!

Can we leave?

I'm with you, Norman.

Wait a sec.

Oh, no.

What?

Missed a spot.

Julian,

Guess who's fired now?

Blah!

Don't you ever invite me to
one of these parties ever again!

Norman. Norman!

You know, not that I'm trying to
be inquisitive, but I just got fired.

You smell like butterscotch, and
you've got a small case of invisibility.

What the fuck is going on?

Listen, I'll explain everything in the
truck while we're driving away, okay?

Julian's not gonna be very
happy about us taking his truck.

I know. And I can't think of a
better reason to take it. Can you?

Nope.

Excuse me. Could I
hitch a lift into Hollywood?

My ride turned out to be an asshole.

Uh, no, I'm sorry, but...

Sure, hop in.

What did you say?

I said, no, sure, I'm sorry, hop in.

I'm having trouble making up my mind.

So...

How did you do that?

I'm telekinetic.

Don't mind him.

Who?

Me.

What?

I'm talking to myself.

No, you're not.

Yes, I am.

This is too weird.

Who are you gonna believe, me or me?

Don't scare her. Kelly was nice to me.

How do you know my name?

I'm telepathic as well.

What are you lying for? Tell her the truth.

Oh, like she's gonna believe
I'm talking to an invisible man.

Get real.

Norman, is that you?

That's up into debate at the moment.

Get in, Kelly, and I'll
explain what happened.

This ought to be an interesting trip.

The last time I
represent any actresses

whose first name
begins with the letter K...

Where the hell is it?

Becky! Are you sure you
haven't seen my wallet upstairs?

I've looked everywhere, Robert!
It must be down there somewhere!

Butterscotch!

Now this looks very interesting.

♪♪

Hey, hey, hey.

This is quite a place.

Every actor needs
something to fall back on.

Makeup effects.

I was kind of going for that

monsters have invaded and
destroyed everything in their path look.

This sucks.

I lost my girl, my apartment, my
job, and my body all in the same day.

Norman, cheer up.

You may get lucky.

Getting laid is not the answer.

Usually works for me.

Yeah, and when was the
last time you were in bed?

When was the last time you were invisible?

Oh, my last ten auditions.

So, Norman, what exactly
happened to you at the party?

Yeah, how come you smell like butterscotch?

It was that vat in Wolf's basement.

I got angry, accidentally broke it,

and this slimy orange
stuff poured all over me.

The next thing you know, I'm invisible.

The stuff smelled like butterscotch,
and now I smell like butterscotch.

Beats dog shit.

So, what exactly does
it feel like to be invisible?

Kind of chilly.

You just think how much
you'll save on summer apparel.

Oh, wow.

This is so wild.

I better go take a cold shower.

To wash off the invisibility formula?

Among other things.

Ah, shit.

Stub a toe?

Not exactly.

I better get out of here.

Why?

You kind of like Norman, don't you?

I don't know.

We really did just meet.

He's the sweetest guy in the world.

Next to me, of course, but
you should give him a chance.

He really could use some cheering up.

Hey, Paul, your shower isn't working.

That's funny. That's what I said
when I tried to use it last week.

Aw, man, how am I supposed to
wash this shit off without running water?

You know, I've got a cat
around here somewhere.

I bet she can help.

She loves butterscotch.

Here, maggot.

Come here, maggot.

Where are you, maggot?

Norman?

I've got a working shower back at my place.

It's the least I can do.

Good, then get out.

There's barely enough room for me in here.

Paul, I can't just
intrude on Kelly like this.

Don't listen to him.

Norman's a wonderful guest.

You won't even know he's there.

Good night.

Cupid with an attitude

Just to let you know I
don't usually that strange

invisible men into my home
I am making an exception

Cool.

Um, excuse me.

Excuse me. Hey, get out of there.

Hey.

Excuse me. Pardon me.
Come through. Come through.

Um.

Fat pig.

Come on.

This is the home of Madame Nirvana.

Mistress of all things dark and scary.

I thought you were an actress.

My day job.

Actually, I just ran out the back.

So, Nirvana's the kind of
the old grandmother type?

Not quite.

I'm strange.

What's she doing?

Linda, what's the spell tonight?

Pregnancy spell.

That'll be a trick.

I'm aligning this young man's sperm

so that he will eat up
most of his wife tonight.

Oops.

Guess I'll just have to build you up again.

Looks like you've got
everything under control.

See you tomorrow.

Um, all right. I hope we don't keep you up.

This might be a long, hard one.

Looks that way to me.

Wait up.

Ooh. Complementary chocolate?

Is that what she does every night?

Only on occasion. Sex
pals are her specialty.

Well, do what you're good at, I always say.

Bathroom's right through there.

And let me know if you need any help.

Tempting. Thanks again, Kelly.

Excuse me.

I just wanted to get your advice on it.

He is so cute, but I
didn't know what to do.

Because he wanted to kiss
me, and then I didn't know if he,

you know, we're just friends.

I think it's going to work.

Never fails.

Soon as we get you back in shape,

we get your wife to eat
one of these chocolates.

That contains my lubrication guaranteed

screw me all night smells.

Pregnancy is unstoppable.

I heard this thing, you know.

Well, maybe I should go out with him again.

But I don't know.

I've tried to tell him, but then I
don't want to go too far away.

You know what I mean?

Because then I don't want him to just
like think that it's just a physical thing.

I want him to be more emotional about it.

I don't know.

I get really good at
this advice, and I just

really would love if
you just call me back

and let me know.

I think I should do.

Because you always have great luck
with guys, and I'm just like, I don't know.

Maybe I'm just in a low right now.

Probably is just a low.

Just call me back, I
know you're really busy,

and well maybe we
could get running and we

could discuss it then.

Maybe you could call
me back and let me know.

Hey, Kelly, it didn't work.

The only thing this shower did
was give me an annoying heart.

Really?

Whoops. Better go.

Oh, it's the last thing you better do.

Oh, wow.

Oh, weak.

Uh.

Does the scent of butterscotch
always affect you this way?

I was about to ask you the same thing.

Actually, I'm always like this.

But I guess now I'm an invisible man

with a constant erection.

There's a scary thought.

Not as scary as trying to shave tomorrow.

I'll talk to Linda.

Maybe she can help.

Her spells are usually pretty good.

Well, they look good to me.

Do you have any acting
gigs in the next three days?

Not at the moment.

Why, what's up?

I just got a letter from
my cousin in England.

He seems to be having a
bit of a poltergeist problem,

and he requests my assistance.

So what do you say?

How about a nice
weekend trip to the country?

Let's see.

Unemployed actress,
round trip ticket to England.

Something in the money department

doesn't quite balance out.

He sent two tickets.

Count me in.

Great.

Well, I must admit, this
has been some evening.

First I turn invisible, and then I

get hooked up with an actress who

goes ghost hunting on the side.

Pretty strange, huh?

We passed strange about three hours ago.

This is fucked up.

Oh, Norman, just go with the flow.

I'm sure Nivana can solve
your little problem in England.

Oh, and I'm going to England?

Any reason why you can't?

I, uh, my, no.

I have an audition tomorrow.

Unless it's for voiceover work, I'd

say you probably don't have
the look they're going for.

Yeah, well, I don't have the money

for a ticket to England either.

I don't think we're
going to have any trouble

sneaking you on the plane.

You know what I mean?

Will you?

Come on, you bloody wanker!
Move that pile of rubbish!

Lousy, bleeding pig-fucker!

Yeah, well, bullets to you too, missus!

I'll come up there and
rip your bloody eyes out!

Hay fever?

How'd you guess?

I'll cast a nasal passage opener spell
on you when we get back to the manor.

Right!

Come on! Come on! Let's get going!

Watch it, you gobby, silly fruitcake!

Bloody idiot!

I'll run over there and shove
a plate of bangers up your ass.

I bet you'd like that, wouldn't you?

Did you hear what he said?

Mr. Bo, I have Fredrick Wolfe on line one.

Put him through.

Robert, Fred Wolfe
disappeared you last night.

Oh, I made some interesting
discoveries and vanished early.

In fact, Fred, I'm going to be
leaving this agent biz for good.

A whole new world of possibilities
has opened up for me since last night.

Good. I mean, good luck.

But before you go, we want
to test one of your clients.

That actress from last night. Kelly
Parkinson, I believe was her name.

My director was quite taken with it.

Kelly will be delighted to hear it.

Excellent. Take care.

You too. Bye.

Kelly will eat her words
when she hears about this.

In fact, I can get her to come
over here and eat more than that.

Hello, you've reached the
residence of Kelly Parkinson.

I've taken a little jaunt to
England for the weekend.

Page me, you can't. I'm too far away.

However, leave a message and I'll
get back to you sometime next week.

Have a nice day. Unless you're
my asshole agent Robert Bull.

In that case, go to hell.

We'll see about that, Kelly.

Mr. Bull, I have Miss Becky
Lovey out here to see you.

Wish her luck.

She's brought her European
model friend over to meet you.

Oh. Well.

I think I can squeeze one more
appointment in before I take off.

Send the man.

Where is he?

Probably just stepped out
for a minute. Have a seat.

Don't mind if I do.

Hey! Cut it out.

Cut what out?

Don't play like that. What
are you talking about?

I didn't know you were
into that sort of thing.

Who said I was?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, lick me there.

Something strange is going on here.

This is the type of strange I like.

What was that?

It was just me.

I didn't know you were so talented.

Thank you.

I hope you enjoyed this video.

Bye!

I didn't know you were
such a contortionist.

Oh, I didn't know you
had such delicious fingers.

That was fun.

But it's nothing compared to what
I'm gonna do with Kelly Parkinson.

Now pretty flower, won't
you grow just a little?

You get plenty of sunlight,
I water you twice a day.

Why do you have to be such an ungrateful,

lousy, bleeding pig fucker?

It all started about two weeks ago,

right after dear old Bernard's funeral.

Margaret and I were having
some people over for team biscuits

when all of a sudden the empty dishes

got up and floated off into the kitchen.

We heard the water running
and when we went to check it out,

sure enough, the dishes were being washed

and dried all by themselves.

And it hasn't stopped there, I mean,

beds are being made by themselves,

vacuum cleaners running
at all hours of the night,

trays of food being left by the door.

I tripped on one the other
day and nearly broke my neck.

Who was Bernard?

Howard Butler, very dear, devoted servant,

but I don't think he realizes

that his services are no longer needed.

I see.

Well, we will start the seance

as soon as Kelly gets back.

The sooner the better.

I don't need this aggravation
from a lousy client, you know.

Look at all the rest
of them, they all grow.

Grow, you bastard, grow.

You're not special, you fuck.

Will you admit that, love?

The love.

Never did quite like the ones on my shirt.

That's really quite good.

Seems a bit funny.

Put your lugs up there.

Oh, love, give us six pence.

You know, it would be really awkward

if the invisibility formula
were to wear off right now.

Speaking of which, when are
you gonna tell Madam Nirvana

about me and start looking for an antidote?

Later, you don't wanna confuse her

when she's on a ghost hunt.

It would be too confusing.

You just like having me all to yourself

as your private little invisible sex toy?

Well, it doesn't suck.

No, but it does, or have
you forgotten already?

Oh, Norman, Norman, Norman's not here.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Why, nobody can see me.

What you doing over there?

I'm gonna look into the mouth of the road.

Norman.

There he is.

Lovely, lovely.

Is that Norman?

Norman.

Well, check this out, okay?

Come here.

Norman.

Yes.

Spit the fluff, man.

Yes, I like that.

Hi.

Don't mind us.

Just having a little fun.

Be careful, he'll have a heart attack.

Hey.

That's quite humorous.

I'd rather just see him.

Let's go, Norman.

Hi, love.

Wait a minute, this is a public place.

I'm not gonna have my girlfriend

told off by some stupid mime.

Norman, Norman, what are you doing?

What are you doing?

You snipped on something, didn't you?

Why don't you go to school, mate?

Mind this, you fucker.

Come on.

You're the only one too.

All right, eh?

He should be on the penny.

Yeah!

Nice one.

Come on.

There you go.

Come on.

Hey.

He should be on the penny.

Yes!

All right.

That's the best one I've seen yet.

Yeah.

Come on.

Conolobnos miribus spira
catar nimbolus nosticos lasum

What is she saying?

The instructions from my computer manual.

Tonight we call upon the spirits.

We hope to reach Bernard Rollins.

Are you here, Bernard?

Are you here?

Oh, he's here, all right.

He's here.

He's here, all right.

He just finished washing
the pantry windows.

I have never seen them so clean.

Shh.

We must all concentrate if
we are to reach the spirit world.

Maybe I can help.

Good Lord, how could you?

Nirvana, he's here.

Norm?

I'm right beside you.

I think this is the real thing.

Stop!

If I am addressing the
spirit of Bernard Rawlins,

I order you to listen
to what I have to say.

I am here to inform you that
your duties as a Sullivan's butler

have been terminated
since you have terminated.

If you understand, please
drop the paper towels now

and leave the premises.

I'm sure the afterlife is a mess
and could use a good butler.

Is that it?

We'll see.

You see?

He won't listen. Clean, clean,
clean, morning, noon and night.

It's enough to drive a person crazy.

And Margaret keeps a clean home.
This is beginning to give her a complex.

Oh, Edward, this is much
more serious than I thought.

Um, was Bernard a very
straight-laced butler before he died?

Very prim and proper, no nonsense.

He was 78 when he passed away.

Couldn't stand the thought of
Margaret and I up past nine o'clock.

Well, then, I have an idea.

But you have to keep an open mind.

Whatever it takes. I mean,
this cleaning has got to stop.

What are you planning to do?

What's the one thing a prim and
proper English butler can't handle?

A wild party.

Bingo.

And after everyone eats one
of these aphrodisiac chocolates,

we'll see how long this butler stays in
a household that turns into a sex den.

I had no idea what those things were.

Who would ever think of using
chocolate as an aphrodisiac?

Here you go, honey.

What is this for?

Something to rid us of
all our annoying spirits.

And our clothes.

What was... in that?

Something to lessen your inhibitions, dear.

Oh, God.

Inhibitions? Nothing.

Oh, I'm bloody horny.

Oh, I think it's working.

Shall we?

Why not?

No, Mr. Sullivan, madam.

You must use...

Oh, no, not with the cleaning utensils.

How's that for a party?

This is no way for a proper
English household to act.

Come on, Bernard. Join us.

Show us that there's
just some life after death.

Fine, I'd never.

But he won't. I will.

Don't you hear, Bernie?

Madam, that is not me.

I can't even believe that
you would have tried to...

This is a pawn! I will not
be witness to such depravity!

How about our own private party?

That is it!

I'm sorry to say this, but I resign.

You shall never catch me in
this perverted household again.

Good night!

I'll take the trash on my way out.

I think that we got rid
of Bernard for good.

And what a way to go about it.

But who are we going to
get to clean up this mess?

Norman! Who are you?

Not so loud, please.

I've got great news.

And I've got a hangover.

Frederick Wolfe wants me in his movie.

Who?

Frederick Wolfe, big Hollywood producer,

threw the party you
catered the other night,

owns the basement
where you found the vat of

butterscotch goo that
turned you invisible.

Ring any bells?

Don't, don't, don't ring any bells, please.

Well, he wants to screen test
me for a part, so we're off to Italy.

Great.

Hey, Mom, here I am in
front of the Portoroso Hotel.

Here's Norman at Club Privato.

Here I am again at Plaza del Congreso.

I like the one where
you're smiling the best.

Yeah, yeah.

This transparency
thing is starting to get old.

I'm an actor too, you know.

Low profile is one thing, but no profile.

This is it.

Wish me luck.

Aren't I going in with you?

I need to make a good impression.

I'm with you around,
I might get distracted.

You won't even know I'm there.

Norman, please, just
take a stroll, have fun.

I'll meet you back here in half an hour.

Fine.

Maybe somebody around here
is casting for a radio announcer.

What did I just kiss?

My earlobe.

Norman Berend, Invisible Explorer.

Victorio, you can't leave me.

I love you.

You told me love conquers all.

It's endless.

Take me.

Take my hand, I love.

Oh, give me water, water.

Everything is wrong. I didn't
believe it for one second.

Didn't believe what?

That you're really dead.
That Claudio really loves you.

If you're a zombie, make
love like a zombie, eh?

Zombies don't make love.
They eat people's brains.

In my movie, they eat a pussy.

How?

Doesn't any dead zombie eat a pussy?

Very carefully.

You are decaying.

Your lips might fall off at any
moment, but you don't care.

You are willing to sacrifice them.

That's what this movie is all about.

Amor and love. Undying love.

Love that goes beyond
that time, mind and body.

It's only a sex pic.

It is erotica.

I'm taking your five.

Eh, fango.

I want lunch. I want lunch.

Clown.

Cara mia.

I must feel your passion, eh?

I didn't believe it.

You are really, really dead.

Tombstones don't excite me. I'm sorry.

Then do not think of them as tombstones.

Think of them as giant erections.

Hundreds of erections
bursting from the ground.

And the caskets are the womb, eh?

Can't you see it?

No.

That's it. Finito. This movie is over.

Andrette de Zet. Burn the film.

I cannot work by myself.

Three million dollars down
the drain, and I do not care.

If nobody's willing to share my vision,

then I refuse to share
my vision with anybody.

Please, Dino. We're here for you.

What do you want? We'll make it work.

I want to reach new heights of passion.

I want to give the world a hard-on.

Dino, some people
don't find zombies erotic.

I don't need zombies to make my movie work.

In fact, I prefer a sex scene
where there is no touching at all.

But why do we have to be in a graveyard?

Madonna!

Because it is symbolic.

You don't need Dario's
body to make love to him.

You can make love to his ashes.

That is not a bad idea.

I am not having ashes poured all over me.

Then the wind.

Make love to the wind, eh?

The wind?

There is nothing more erotic.

Una bella donna.

A beautiful girl. Her hair
blowing in the powerful wind.

We can do it. We can
capture the same erotica

as the Wizard of Oz did so many years ago.

Now, let us try, eh?

Start the wind machine!

Okay, let's move.

Okay.

Going again.

Make love to the wind.

Your lover is dead.

He is now a part of nature.

The wind is a true nature, eh?

Use that.

And...

Action!

The making of the sequel,
Night of the Loving Dead.

I got a three million dollar
bomb going in my hands!

Can anybody help me?

Dio, dio, dio!

If it's a passion of your remaining,

Norman Parent is here to apply.

Hello.

Che gioia!

Claudia!

Bene, bene, Claudia!

Make love to the wind.

Go with it.

Let the wind take you, eh?

Let it take you around
and around and around!

That's the wind.

Mia mia! Mio tesoro!

That was the kind of
affection I was looking for.

You were great, great! Bellissimo!

Eh, I knew it better.

Dino, Dino, are we done with this location?

Eccola! My vision had it easier.

That's a wrap!

All right!

Let me get the beer, eh?

Come on!

There's these three dogs
in a room with six bones.

The mathematician's dog, the
scientist's dog, and the producer's dog.

Now, the mathematician's
dog takes the bones

and divides them up
into three piles of two.

And the scientist's
dog, the scientist's dog,

arranges all the bones into
different geometric configurations.

And the producer's dog eats all the bones,

fucks the other two dogs,
and goes home early.

Drew!

Kelly.

Drew, I have to go to the bathroom.

Why don't I meet you back at the car?

Sure.

It's just the second door on your left.

So, what's up?

It went great. He wants me.

I know he wants you,
but what about the film?

Norm, it's strictly professional.

Drew even called my agent
Robert before we left England.

Supposedly, when Robert
found out I was here,

he wanted to come down
right away to finalize the deal.

So, where are you off to now?

We're just going to go to lunch.

Drew wants me to see some of the sights.

Yeah, right.

Norman, I'm a big girl. I
can take care of myself.

Don't be so possessive. That's
why I dumped my last boyfriend.

So, you're dumping me now?

No, that's not what I said.

Look, I gotta go. I'll meet
you back at the hotel later.

Kelly.

Kelly.

Kelly!

Yes, can I help you?

You got any grapes?

Uh, grapes? No. Nuts.

No grapes.

That duck probably has more
luck with women than I do.

Who am I kidding?

That director has a job,
his own office, a body.

All I've got is air. Air is cheap.

What woman wants a man
without substance, huh?

Can't wait to see the look on
Kelly's face when she doesn't see me.

Robert Bull, as in hung like a...

Oh, one moment, sir.

I'm so sorry, but I see no
reservation under that name.

Well, then you guys must have screwed up.

I'll take the best room you've got.

I'm so sorry, sir, but we are
completely booked up until next week.

I'm sorry, no openings.

Really?

After all the reports of
supernatural activity...

Ghost sightings...

Ghosts?

Paradise attacks...

Sir, I don't know
what you're talking

about, but could you
just, like, step aside?

Because Mrs. and
Mr. Sobby have reservations.

I'm so sorry. Hello.

Oh, what's wrong?

How are you?

Some crazy, some crazy...

Believe me, Mrs. Savit, that man is crazy.

Ghosts in our hotel?

Who-who-who?

Now, who ever heard of such a thing?

Oh, my dear.

Tell me!

Ring my bell.

Oh, no!

Ring my bell!

Oh, no!

I do not believe in ghosts!

Oh, shut up.

I do not believe in ghosts!

I do believe in ghosts.

Now, what was that about no openings?

There's a lot of openings.

A lot of openings.

Hey, what are you doing?

This was supposed to scare you.

I'm not turning you on.

Please, haunt me.

Haunt me, please.

Haunt me.

Yes!

Oh, yes.

Well, run and roam.

Oh, yes.

Yes.

Oh, yes.

Yes.

Now that's what I call Agent Perks.

Uh, yeah. Yeah.

Got any grapes?

No. We don't got any grapes, okay?

This is a bar. No grapes, okay?

And you're sure?

I said we don't got any grapes, okay?

You come in asking me
that question one more time,

I take a hammer, I take a nail,

I nail your stupid
webbed feet to the floor.

No grapes, okay?

Doc?

It's just latex. When it
hardens, I'll let you out.

Stop struggling. You're such a pussy.

Hello?

Norman, where the hell are you?

You're missing it. I'm
making a mold of maggot.

Paul, I've been dumped again.

Kelly abandoned me in Italy.

Why? Because you're never around?

Very funny. But it's true.

The formula still hasn't worn off
and Kelly's ran off with a real man.

But who can blame her? Look at me.

Well, you can't.

What is this, feeling sorry for yourself?

Norman!

You're an actor.
Rejection is a way of life.

Yeah, but losing two girls
in one week is depressing.

So, go get her back.

Show her what kind of
guy Norman Parent really is.

Yeah, the invisible kind.

Appearances are only skin
deep. It's what's inside that counts.

I read that in a fortune cookie.

You're right. Who needs to
see you when you can feel?

So what if I'm invisible?
I'm naked and proud of it.

None of us need to see that.

Thanks, Paul.

You know, it's time to
take back control of my life.

I'll send you a postcard. Bye, buddy.

Shit.

How you doing in there, maggot?

You breathing okay?

SHUT UP!

Okay, I'm just gonna
walk right over there and...

give this a little more thought.

Due grappa.

Grazie.

I had a wonderful time today, Drew.

The day's not over yet.

You know, I'd love to
hear more about the role.

Well, that's exactly
what you're going to hear.

Your agent is supposed
to meet us here any minute.

I left a message with him at the office.

You think of everything.

Grazie, grazie.

Cheers.

We sit, we drink.

You tell me what you think.

What I think?

Yes.

It's important to feel, but to
have the sexual magnetism

of Pasolini, but maintain
the social significance

of the conte, the si, the Mussolini, yeah?

Kelly, you can't judge a book by its cover.

Now, suppose the book didn't have a cover.

Does that mean you wouldn't read it?

No, you'd probably turn
to the table of contents.

Well, what if the contents
was ripped out as well?

Then you'd have to look
inside and see what was there.

And let's say when you looked inside,

all the words had been erased.

You see what I'm getting at?

Claudia, you were magnificent today.

You uncovered the meaning of my movie,

make a love to nature.

Who knows, maybe we'll save some rain

in a forest with this epic, eh?

Epic?

A sexy film about a horny zombie is

going to save a rain forest?

It's all about the vision.

Without the vision, you
can see nothing, eh?

Well, Dino, can't argue with you there.

Showtime.

Out of my way.

Kelly Parkinson, your agent has arrived.

Do you care to dance, then?

Oh, yeah.

OK.

Kippa.

Yeah.

Yeah, just nod your head.

Yes.

Anything to get away from this madman.

I take that as a compliment, eh?

Salute.

Do you dance?

Only in Italian bars with directors I like.

Well, will I do until then?

Give it a shot.

Drew, is everything all right?

What?

No, everything's fine.

Let's say you open the book
and all the words aren't erased.

They're all in braille.

You see, you have to feel
your way through the story.

So, just think of our relationship as if
you were trying to read a book while blind.

Oh, I just love that wind machine of yours.

You must let me borrow it sometime.

Yeah, okay.

How could they give someone like
that three million to make a movie?

I hear he's sleeping with the producer.

But I thought the
producer died the last week.

Now it all makes sense.

Drew?

Yes.

Just a hypothetical question.

You know that role you think I'm right for?

Would you still think I was so right if I

wouldn't sleep with you?

I must admit, I'm
surprised by your bluntness.

Fact of the matter is, you
gave a damn good screen

test today, Kelly.

I want good actors in my movie.

Anything else is secondary.

I'm so glad to hear you say that.

But actions speak louder than words.

Drew, that's not funny.

I didn't mean it to be funny.

I'm being serious.

You bastard.

What are you getting so upset for?

What, you want me to sleep with you?

Not so fast, babe.

It's my turn now.

Norman, are you the one who pinched me?

You asshole.

Let me go.

I have to apologize.

No way.

You're mine now.

Norman.

Norman, quit.

Stop this at once.

Norman, no.

A blind table of contents
means nothing unless you

know how to read the cover.

Norman.

One moment.

I've almost got this.

The heart of a book is.

Norman.

Kelly.

Play my kind of game, baby.

A little invisible.

Kelly.

What's going on?

Kelly.

Norman?

Yeah, it's me.

What's the matter?

Norman.

Serves you right.

I'm not finished yet, baby.

What?

Norman, what?

Stop calling me Norman, Kelly.

The name's Robert.

This time I want more than 10%.

She's being raped by a ghost.

Oh, she's incredible.

Where are my cameras, huh?

Another invisible man?

Find your own actors, dirtbag.

Kelly, it's me.

Where do you think you're going?

Let go of her.

You let go of her, whoever
you are, you bastard.

She's mine.

Come here, Kelly.

Enough is enough.

Come here, you.

I'm the Invisible Man!

No you're not.

You're just a cheap imitation.

Sorry. The concept of an
Invisible Man is public domain.

Remember, it's never
about who's the first,

but who's the biggest
and best at Hollywood.

Sucker!

Now, where was I?

Well, let's see...

Oh no! Oh no!

Robert, how's this for a deal breaker?

Kelly! Kelly, I'm over here.

God, they'll never drop again.

Thanks.

There's a pervert! There's a pervert here!

It's the missing link.

Policia! Policia!

A man with a snore, man.

It's a pervert.

Got any nails?

No.

I don't think so.

No.

Got any grapes?

Alright.

Thanks.

You were great back there.

I never had a man stand
up for me like that before.

Actually, I was in a crouched
position most of the time.

Feel better?

Dab a little lower and find out.

Hmm. All right.

Wish I could see you.

Just close your eyes and imagine.

Like if you were reading a good book.

What?

Oh, never mind.

Come here.

Where do we go from here?

We'll just have to wait
and see now, won't we?