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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:49,712 --> 00:02:52,381 Did you try that pumpkin pie? —[Woman] No. 2 00:02:52,465 --> 00:02:55,509 It looked good, but how many desserts does my mother need to make? 3 00:02:55,593 --> 00:02:58,929 I don't know. I think Carl had one of everything though. 4 00:03:00,306 --> 00:03:02,350 I think Jo and Carl want to get married. 5 00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:04,685 Yeah, it seems that they really love each other. 6 00:03:04,769 --> 00:03:07,897 Oh, I think they're in love. Don't you? —yeah. 7 00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:10,191 It's just hard to tell sometimes from the outside. 8 00:03:10,274 --> 00:03:12,610 I think my mother would love for them to get married. 9 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,338 Are you kidding? She's probably got the number 10 00:03:14,362 --> 00:03:17,073 of the catering hall on speed dial. 11 00:03:17,156 --> 00:03:20,242 Thanks for staying out so late. 12 00:03:22,578 --> 00:03:24,080 Happy Thanksgiving. 13 00:03:31,921 --> 00:03:33,756 [Dog barking] 14 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,812 I love you. 15 00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:42,450 You're wearing my favorite suit. 16 00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:47,830 I just can't wake up today. I don't know what's wrong with me. 17 00:04:47,913 --> 00:04:49,915 You have a good sleep? 18 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:56,297 -You okay? —mm—hmm. 19 00:04:56,380 --> 00:04:58,883 I'm sorry about tonight. I've really got to go to this thing. 20 00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:00,176 It's okay. 21 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,721 Do you want to have dinner in the city tomorrow? 22 00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:05,723 Yeah. —okay. 23 00:05:08,184 --> 00:05:09,226 What? 24 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:48,849 [Man] The damn car's acting up again. 25 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:52,394 It starts knocking when I turn the heater on. 26 00:05:52,478 --> 00:05:54,021 Why don't you get it checked? 27 00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:57,024 Kenny said there was nothing wrong with it. 28 00:05:57,107 --> 00:05:59,485 [Woman] You never should've bought a used car. 29 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:03,113 It's always made that knocking sound. 30 00:06:03,197 --> 00:06:05,574 Is it supposed to make that sound? 31 00:06:05,658 --> 00:06:08,619 Of course not. Are they up yet? 32 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,704 [Woman] Jo said she wanted to get up early. 33 00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:13,165 Knowing her, she'll probably sleep all day. 34 00:06:13,249 --> 00:06:15,292 Ah, shit! 35 00:06:17,253 --> 00:06:19,630 - —[Man exclaiming] - [Mutters] 36 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:21,048 [Moans] 37 00:06:22,299 --> 00:06:23,551 Why? 38 00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:26,887 Why are you up so early? 39 00:06:29,515 --> 00:06:32,351 Mom and dad are making so much fucking noise in the kitchen. 40 00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:34,520 - [Moans] - [Objects clattering] 41 00:06:34,603 --> 00:06:36,021 What are they doing? 42 00:06:36,981 --> 00:06:38,357 [Man] Should we wake those two up? 43 00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,859 - —[Machine grinding] - Should we wake those two up? 44 00:06:40,943 --> 00:06:44,029 - I can't hear you! - Should we wake those two up? 45 00:06:44,113 --> 00:06:47,741 Well, if they ever want to get into the city, they should get up. 46 00:06:50,244 --> 00:06:51,662 [Vacuum humming] 47 00:06:54,373 --> 00:06:58,127 [Moans] Hey, Jo? We'd better not. 48 00:06:59,253 --> 00:07:01,088 Yeah, we'd better not. 49 00:07:02,381 --> 00:07:05,009 Um, you know, house rules and all. 50 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,762 [Objects clattering] 51 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:11,849 Ooh, um... hmm. Did you sleep well? 52 00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,768 Hmm—mm. I don't like sleeping without you. 53 00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:16,770 Yeah, well, 54 00:07:16,854 --> 00:07:20,107 your mother made it very clear that we shouldn't, uh... 55 00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:22,610 What does she think we do back home? 56 00:07:22,693 --> 00:07:24,862 - You know? - [Moans] 57 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:27,031 Josephine! 58 00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:32,620 Morning, Mrs. Malone. 59 00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:34,663 Oh, Carl. Did you sleep well? 60 00:07:34,747 --> 00:07:36,832 Yes. I had a wonderful night's sleep, thank you. 61 00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:38,167 Oh, good, good. 62 00:07:39,168 --> 00:07:41,795 Uh, what is it that smells so incredible? 63 00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:44,089 Oh, I was just making a little breakfast... 64 00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:47,343 Bacon and eggs, sausage, pancakes, whatever you'd like. 65 00:07:47,426 --> 00:07:49,595 - —Yum. - [Both chuckle] 66 00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,806 Come on, Jo. Wake up! Soup's on! 67 00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:56,477 Would you like some entenmann's? 68 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,188 We got a really good price on this cake. 69 00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:01,231 Everything was two-for-one. 70 00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:03,776 Yeah. I mean, it was some sale. 71 00:08:05,402 --> 00:08:07,571 Here we go. 72 00:08:07,655 --> 00:08:10,741 How about some cinnamon filbert ring, huh? 73 00:08:12,201 --> 00:08:13,911 Mm, I don't want that. 74 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:16,580 I don't normally eat this much for breakfast. 75 00:08:17,623 --> 00:08:21,460 Why do you... why do you put this junk in your hair, huh? Why? 76 00:08:21,543 --> 00:08:24,963 This is an excellent cinnamon filbert ring, Rita. 77 00:08:25,047 --> 00:08:29,551 Are you at least going to comb this mess before you go outside? 78 00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:32,137 - —Hmm—mm. - I see Carl doesn't find it necessary 79 00:08:32,221 --> 00:08:33,722 to deface himself. 80 00:08:33,806 --> 00:08:35,891 Carl, show mom your nipples. [Coughs] 81 00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:38,185 - —[Laughing] - Finish your breakfast. 82 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:40,729 I'm done. 83 00:08:41,939 --> 00:08:44,983 Are you wearing that little skirt? You'll freeze to death. 84 00:08:45,067 --> 00:08:47,444 Dad, drive us to the train station! 85 00:08:48,237 --> 00:08:50,030 [Rita] Try to help her, Carl. 86 00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:55,994 - Hiya, dad. - Hey, kid. What brings you here? 87 00:08:56,078 --> 00:08:57,955 I got to talk to mom about something. 88 00:08:58,038 --> 00:09:00,666 - Just in time for breakfast. - —oh, I'm not hungry. 89 00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:02,268 - Good morning, my darling. - Good morning. 90 00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:04,461 - How are you? - I'm good. How you doin', miss Malone? 91 00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:05,921 Oh, fine. 92 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:09,049 We should show this to someone who would understand it. 93 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:11,844 Wait a minute. I don't want to make a big deal out of this. 94 00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:14,638 Who knows what this is. —ah, don't worry. 95 00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:16,473 We'll keep it in the family. 96 00:09:17,850 --> 00:09:21,937 "Dearest, please accept this token of my love and devotion. 97 00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:25,107 I'm grateful for what we have, but I want so much more. 98 00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:28,527 In short, I want you entirely. 99 00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,654 Alas, as Andrew marvell wrote, 100 00:09:30,738 --> 00:09:32,489 'therefore, the love which us doth bind 101 00:09:32,573 --> 00:09:35,242 but fate so enviously debars 102 00:09:35,325 --> 00:09:40,038 is the conjunction of the mind and opposition of the stars.' 103 00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:41,790 love forever, Sandy." 104 00:09:41,874 --> 00:09:44,835 [Rita] Carl, you're a very smart young man. What is this? 105 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:47,379 I don't understand poetry. 106 00:09:47,463 --> 00:09:50,632 Well, Andrew marvell was a 17th-century poet, 107 00:09:50,716 --> 00:09:52,426 a predecessor of Shakespeare's, 108 00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:55,596 one of the elizabethan metaphysical poets. 109 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,431 This poem... 110 00:09:57,514 --> 00:10:00,100 Basically, the poem says that 111 00:10:00,184 --> 00:10:04,062 love binds us together and we're like, totally in sync, 112 00:10:04,146 --> 00:10:07,691 but it's a drag because circumstances keep us apart. 113 00:10:07,775 --> 00:10:11,779 - Do you think this was written to Louis? - No. I mean, I hope not. 114 00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:14,740 - Do you know who Sandy is? - No, I have no idea. 115 00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:17,993 Carl, couldn't this be a note from a barracuda 116 00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:20,537 who was having an affair with a married man? 117 00:10:20,621 --> 00:10:23,916 - I... - We don't know who this was written to. 118 00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:26,251 Eliza, you should call Louis. 119 00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:29,254 I should just call him and ask him what this is. 120 00:10:29,338 --> 00:10:30,631 [Rita] No, no. 121 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:34,384 I don't think that's a smart idea. 122 00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:37,930 - —Why not? - It's very easy to lie on the phone. 123 00:10:39,056 --> 00:10:41,517 See, you can't see the eyes. 124 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,186 The eyes always give you away. 125 00:10:44,269 --> 00:10:46,563 - So what should I do? - I suggest 126 00:10:46,647 --> 00:10:50,609 that we drive you into the city and you talk to him face to face. 127 00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:53,028 [Jo] Um, are you sure this is such a good idea? 128 00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:55,280 [Scoffs] It's not up to me. 129 00:10:56,448 --> 00:10:59,076 Eliza, what do you think? 130 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:12,923 [Rita] Carl, why don't you sit in the front? 131 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:15,384 You're so tall, you'll get all squished back there. 132 00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:18,136 - I'll be fine, but thank you, Rita. - Sure. 133 00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:17,446 [Jo] Look at these hideous buildings. 134 00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:19,656 Architecture is dead. 135 00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:22,534 The architects have run out of ideas. It's all references. 136 00:12:22,618 --> 00:12:26,747 The Europeans may have been imperialists, but they knew how to make a building. 137 00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:31,668 You know what, you guys? 138 00:12:31,752 --> 00:12:35,213 Things are fine — I mean, they're great — Between me and Louis, 139 00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:38,216 you know, in... in every department. 140 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:41,762 - —Everything is fine. - I know, I know, honey. Of course. 141 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:46,808 Oh, Jo, you remember your little friend Vinnie tucillo? 142 00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:48,060 Uh, yeah. 143 00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:51,021 Well, Mrs. O'Connor told me he was just sent to jail. 144 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,356 What took so long? 145 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:56,818 Did you hear about Mr. Andrews having an affair with a tenth-grader? 146 00:12:56,902 --> 00:12:59,780 They fired him. I mean, it was some scandal. 147 00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:02,157 Did you know my mom writes the society page 148 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,117 for the deer park pennysaver? 149 00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:06,119 Really? —no. 150 00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:09,915 Also, I mean, he works for a publishing company. 151 00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:12,668 You know, he's got other people's manuscripts, 152 00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:14,795 all kinds of stuff in his briefcase. 153 00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:16,838 That note could've belonged to anyone. 154 00:13:16,922 --> 00:13:19,174 - [Tires screech] - Jim, watch out! 155 00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:21,677 - That truck, idiot! - He's nowhere near me. 156 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:25,055 - So what are you guys gonna do today? - —shopping. 157 00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,684 I was thinking we'd check out the Dutch modernism show at the Cooper-Hewitt. 158 00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:33,981 - Are you guys gonna stay in Michigan? - —yeah. 159 00:13:34,064 --> 00:13:36,900 Yeah, for now. Carl's got this great job. 160 00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:41,196 No, it's just construction work. The pay's really good, so... 161 00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:44,992 Carl, tell mom and dad about your novel. Carl wrote a novel, everyone. 162 00:13:45,075 --> 00:13:48,370 It's great. It's just far-out. It's brilliant. 163 00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,613 I don't think your parents want to hear about my novel. 164 00:13:50,664 --> 00:13:52,833 Mom and dad, do you want to hear about Carl's novel? 165 00:13:52,916 --> 00:13:57,504 - Oh, yeah. Sure, Carl. - Well, uh, Rita, 166 00:13:57,587 --> 00:14:01,425 it's an allegory about spiritual survival in the contemporary world. 167 00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,593 The main character is this freak of nature. 168 00:14:03,677 --> 00:14:06,722 He's this man who doesn't have a normal head. 169 00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:10,809 - He was born with a dog's head. - A dog's head? 170 00:14:10,892 --> 00:14:13,729 Yeah. You know, sort of a fantastical story. 171 00:14:13,812 --> 00:14:16,732 - It's like a fable. - —yeah, like master and marga/773 or... 172 00:14:16,815 --> 00:14:19,568 - An/ma/ farm. - Yeah, exactly. Very kafka-esque. 173 00:14:19,651 --> 00:14:22,654 Carl, I'm not an educated woman. 174 00:14:22,738 --> 00:14:26,783 - It's Dr. Seuss for adults, mom. - —oh. Oh, yeah. 175 00:14:26,867 --> 00:14:30,579 So everybody else in the book is normal except the man with the dog's head, 176 00:14:30,662 --> 00:14:32,497 -who really only wants — -what kind of dog? 177 00:14:32,581 --> 00:14:35,101 - Dad, it's not important. - No, no. No, no, no. It is important. 178 00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:38,712 Actually, that's very important. It's a German shorthaired pointer. 179 00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:41,923 You see, it's actually especially important that it's a pointer 180 00:14:42,007 --> 00:14:44,861 because that's a crucial metaphor, because in the book, he's sort of a... 181 00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:48,889 He's sort of a visionary, you know? You know, pointing the way to salvation? 182 00:14:48,972 --> 00:14:50,682 Jo loves dogs. 183 00:14:50,766 --> 00:14:53,477 Remember pepper? We had to put her to sleep. 184 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,520 Mother... 185 00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:58,607 [Clears throat] So, uh, the man with the dog's head, 186 00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:00,859 who has been treated like a freak all of his life, 187 00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:03,028 get discovered by these people who exploit him 188 00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:06,156 by putting him on every daytime talk show on TV. 189 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:09,993 But the man with the dog's head realizes he's got the ear of the entire nation, 190 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:12,287 so he starts to tell people what he really thinks. 191 00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:15,040 He starts to criticize society. He starts to talk about 192 00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:17,209 how crass it is, how unfeeling. 193 00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:20,003 And as people start to, you know, respond to his message, 194 00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:23,048 he develops this following, which just gets bigger and bigger 195 00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:25,759 until he's this huge visionary leader. 196 00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:27,928 [Rita] Oh, you mean like he can talk, 197 00:15:28,011 --> 00:15:30,347 -just like a person. —well, yeah. 198 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:34,351 He's normal in every way except for, you know, the dog's head. 199 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:37,437 Ah. Now, how would you do that? 200 00:15:37,521 --> 00:15:40,232 - Mom, it's a book, it isn't a movie. - Carl, 201 00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:43,985 - how do you think up this stuff? - Mother... 202 00:15:44,069 --> 00:15:46,905 - [Engine clattering] - Goddamn it! 203 00:15:46,988 --> 00:15:50,117 - [Eliza] What the hell is that? - [Jo] What's causing it, dad? 204 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,328 I don't know. I think it's got something to do with the heater. 205 00:15:53,411 --> 00:15:56,581 I told you to bring the car into Kenny. 206 00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:58,250 [Jim] I did. 207 00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:00,293 It didn't knock for him. 208 00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:03,713 Louis's father had a mistress. 209 00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:07,175 Louis is nothing like his father. 210 00:16:07,259 --> 00:16:10,053 Well, thank god. But then again, who knows? 211 00:16:10,137 --> 00:16:13,682 - They say it's often inherited. - [Indistinct] 212 00:16:13,765 --> 00:16:16,977 I just can't see Louis doing anything like that, mom. 213 00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,478 He's not like that. 214 00:16:18,562 --> 00:16:20,605 Well, he'd better not be. 215 00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,859 I'm gonna go to the bathroom. 216 00:16:27,612 --> 00:16:31,867 He can't fix it now, but we'll be all right if we don't turn the heater on. 217 00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,452 No heat? 218 00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:38,248 Now are you glad you wore that little skirt? 219 00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,356 [Tires squeal] 220 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:05,025 [Horn honks] 221 00:17:06,610 --> 00:17:09,362 [Eliza] Okay, dad, make a right on park. —[Rita] Did you hear her? 222 00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:12,324 I heard her, okay? 223 00:17:12,407 --> 00:17:13,783 Are you cold back there? 224 00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:16,077 -No. —really? 225 00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:18,914 - I'm chilly. - We're almost there, mom. 226 00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:31,509 - I want to see him alone. - Of course. 227 00:17:32,510 --> 00:17:35,013 - —Hello. Can I help you? - [Eliza] Yeah, hi. 228 00:17:35,096 --> 00:17:38,600 I'd like to see Louis d'amico in the marketing and publicity department. 229 00:17:38,683 --> 00:17:41,728 And your name is? —eliza d'amico. I'm his wife. 230 00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:45,607 Oh, I knew you looked familiar. We met at the party at the rainbow room. 231 00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:47,943 - Oh, uh, Cassandra. - Yes! 232 00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:50,487 - Oh, hi. It's nice to see you. - You too. 233 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,697 This is my mother. —oh. 234 00:17:52,781 --> 00:17:55,659 Hi. I'm Louis's mother—in—law. 235 00:17:55,742 --> 00:17:57,577 So nice to meet you. 236 00:17:57,661 --> 00:18:02,249 You are so lucky to have Louis. He's so sweet. 237 00:18:02,916 --> 00:18:05,043 We all love Louis. 238 00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:10,382 I love your — What do you call that, a brooch? 239 00:18:10,465 --> 00:18:12,550 Isn't it cute? Thanks. 240 00:18:14,135 --> 00:18:16,096 So let me get Louis for you. 241 00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:19,516 [Clears throat] 242 00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:21,768 Hi. Is Louis in? 243 00:18:22,686 --> 00:18:24,229 Uh-huh. 244 00:18:24,312 --> 00:18:26,606 When will he be back? 245 00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:29,234 Oh, really? Okay. Thanks. Bye. 246 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:34,197 He's out. Chap gave him the rest of the day off 'cause of the holidays. 247 00:18:34,281 --> 00:18:35,991 But you know what you should do? 248 00:18:36,074 --> 00:18:39,077 Why don't you go back and talk to chap, 'cause he might know more. 249 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:40,912 Do you know which way to go? 250 00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:48,586 [Man] Uh, did you hear the reading on the 23rd moved to the 25th? 251 00:18:49,671 --> 00:18:51,631 Listen. I got a story for you. 252 00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:56,219 Friday night, I'm at the three deuces, right, and I'm wasted. 253 00:18:56,303 --> 00:19:00,515 And, uh, I start talking to this sweet, soft-spoken girl, right? 254 00:19:00,598 --> 00:19:03,518 And I'm really digging her, but I'm not getting any vibe back, 255 00:19:03,601 --> 00:19:05,520 and it's not going anywhere. 256 00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:07,814 Then this punk chick from the other end of the bar 257 00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:10,650 comes over and starts talking to us, and right off the bat, 258 00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:13,820 -she starts talking about sex. —what did she look like? 259 00:19:13,903 --> 00:19:17,032 She was sexy, in a Ruben-esque kind of way. 260 00:19:17,115 --> 00:19:20,076 - She was fat? - No, she was... voluptuous. 261 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:23,955 She was full, okay? And she starts telling me about her sex life 262 00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:26,333 in unbelievably explicit detail. 263 00:19:26,416 --> 00:19:30,086 Isn't it weird when a total stranger tells you that much about their sex life? 264 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:32,380 I mean, that's a little desperate, right? 265 00:19:32,464 --> 00:19:34,466 Desperate — that's your type. 266 00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,468 So eventually, 267 00:19:36,551 --> 00:19:40,096 the sweet girl goes to the restroom and I'm alone with this punk chick. 268 00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:43,683 And I figure, what the hell? Might as well add me to the list, right? 269 00:19:43,767 --> 00:19:46,061 So I go, "let's go over to my place." 270 00:19:46,144 --> 00:19:49,314 And she looks at me like, "you're disgusting!" And takes off. 271 00:19:49,397 --> 00:19:52,067 - I hope that's not the end of this yarn. - —no. 272 00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:56,321 Then I notice that there was a $20 bill I'd left on the bar, and it's gone, 273 00:19:56,404 --> 00:19:57,989 and this punk chick ripped me off. 274 00:19:58,073 --> 00:20:01,576 By now I'm really bombed. It's late. What am I gonna do? 275 00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:03,870 Now the bar's closing, they're kicking everybody out, 276 00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:06,247 and I offer to walk the sweet girl home. 277 00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:10,210 And get this. She goes, "let's go to your place." 278 00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:14,255 Really? Do tell. —well, it was a lot of fun. 279 00:20:14,339 --> 00:20:16,716 And as you may know, it's been a while for me, 280 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:20,887 so she had to kind of walk me through it, but we took care of business. 281 00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:23,890 Next morning, I wake up with this woman, 282 00:20:23,973 --> 00:20:26,935 realize I have completely forgotten her name. 283 00:20:27,018 --> 00:20:28,812 Well, you're a classy guy. 284 00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:31,147 I'm telling you, man, I am racking my brain. 285 00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:33,983 Finally she goes to the bathroom. I start rooting through her purse. 286 00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:37,195 I'm whipping things out. I pull out a credit card that says Cindy bartlett. 287 00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,906 Shove it back in just as she comes out. Everything's cool. 288 00:20:39,989 --> 00:20:43,618 I get her outside and in a cab. As she's getting in the cab, I say, 289 00:20:43,701 --> 00:20:46,830 "it was really nice seeing you, Cindy. Could I get your number?" 290 00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:51,251 And she looks at me like I'm insane. Hops in the cab, takes off. 291 00:20:51,334 --> 00:20:55,213 Last night, I'm back at the three deuces. I'm getting bombed. 292 00:20:55,296 --> 00:20:59,342 In walks the punk chick. I go, "I'm sorry. I can't remember your name." 293 00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:01,428 She goes, "Cindy bartlett. 294 00:21:01,511 --> 00:21:05,098 And by the way, you didn't happen to find my wallet the other night, did you?" 295 00:21:05,181 --> 00:21:07,725 You banged a felon. Good for you. Are you waiting for chap? 296 00:21:07,809 --> 00:21:10,311 - —Yeah. - Are you an author? 297 00:21:12,730 --> 00:21:14,065 Too bad. 298 00:21:15,483 --> 00:21:19,028 You'd look good on a book jacket. My name's Eddie. 299 00:21:19,112 --> 00:21:22,699 How do you do? I'm Eliza d'amico. My husband works here. 300 00:21:24,367 --> 00:21:27,662 I, um, have a book that they're publishing here. 301 00:21:27,745 --> 00:21:29,706 - Your husband is Louis? - Yes. 302 00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:32,876 - He's a great guy. - What's the name of your book? 303 00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:35,670 It's, uh, earthly delights. 304 00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:38,631 Earthly delights? Oh, Edward masler. 305 00:21:38,715 --> 00:21:42,719 Oh, yeah, I read your manuscript. It's very interesting. 306 00:21:42,802 --> 00:21:44,220 -Good "interesting?" —yeah. 307 00:21:44,304 --> 00:21:46,806 Since you're a writer, can I ask you a literary question? 308 00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:48,975 You could ask me a literary question, yeah. 309 00:21:49,058 --> 00:21:51,644 Have you ever heard of the poet Andrew marvell? 310 00:21:51,728 --> 00:21:54,564 Sure, he's great. He wrote one of my all-time favorite poems, 311 00:21:54,647 --> 00:21:56,608 "to his coy mistress." 312 00:21:56,691 --> 00:21:57,901 Well... 313 00:21:58,985 --> 00:22:00,987 Do you recognize this? 314 00:22:03,490 --> 00:22:07,827 "Therefore the love which us doth bind but fate so enviously debars 315 00:22:07,911 --> 00:22:10,663 is the conjunction of the mind and opposition of the stars." 316 00:22:10,747 --> 00:22:13,750 That's the end of "the definition of love." It's a beautiful poem. 317 00:22:15,502 --> 00:22:19,297 - It's a love poem? - Yeah, it's full of great images. 318 00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:22,884 He uses the image of himself and his true love 319 00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:26,638 on opposite Poles of the earth. 320 00:22:26,721 --> 00:22:30,683 The last line, "the opposition of the stars," has a double meaning. 321 00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:32,852 He's talking about the fact that 322 00:22:32,936 --> 00:22:36,314 they can't see the same stars, the same heaven, 323 00:22:36,397 --> 00:22:39,317 because they're on opposite sides of the planet, and also, uh, 324 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:42,195 it means that their love is in opposition to the stars, 325 00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:43,488 against fate. 326 00:22:45,907 --> 00:22:48,826 There's a great line somewhere like, um, 327 00:22:48,910 --> 00:22:52,372 "our love is truly parallel... 328 00:22:53,456 --> 00:22:56,793 Though infinite, can never meet." 329 00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:01,464 Their love is perfect but impossible. 330 00:23:04,384 --> 00:23:07,345 - —Are you all right? - Oh, yes. 331 00:23:07,428 --> 00:23:10,390 Hello, Eliza. Can you give me one sec, please? 332 00:23:10,473 --> 00:23:13,142 Aaron, did you fax that press release? 333 00:23:13,226 --> 00:23:15,228 No, I'm, um, writing it right now. 334 00:23:15,311 --> 00:23:18,022 Oh, well, please, Aaron, take your time. 335 00:23:18,106 --> 00:23:20,817 I think since we've completely missed the deadline, 336 00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:24,153 you might as well take the whole weekend to write the tiny paragraph. 337 00:23:24,237 --> 00:23:26,948 - Oops. - —sorry. I was chewing his ear off. 338 00:23:27,031 --> 00:23:30,368 Well, that's all right. It's lucky these cubicles absorb all sound. 339 00:23:30,451 --> 00:23:33,121 Othennise... [chuckles] God knows what kind of pathetic stories 340 00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:35,623 I'd have to hear about my employees' sex lives. 341 00:23:37,292 --> 00:23:40,169 - —So, Eliza, how can I help you? - Oh, uh, 342 00:23:40,253 --> 00:23:44,173 I made a last-minute trip into the city. My sister's visiting, 343 00:23:44,257 --> 00:23:47,802 and we just thought we'd stop by and see if Louis was around. 344 00:23:47,885 --> 00:23:50,346 Oh, I'm sorry. I gave Louis the rest of the day off. 345 00:23:50,430 --> 00:23:52,974 I don't know where he went. He might check in. 346 00:23:53,057 --> 00:23:55,268 Oh, you know what? The book party tonight. 347 00:23:55,351 --> 00:23:57,729 I might have an invitation somewhere. 348 00:23:57,812 --> 00:23:59,564 I have one. 349 00:23:59,647 --> 00:24:00,982 Oh, very nice. 350 00:24:01,065 --> 00:24:03,109 Thank you. —I'm sure Louis will be there. 351 00:24:03,192 --> 00:24:05,778 All right. Thank you. Nice to meet you. 352 00:24:05,862 --> 00:24:07,238 Nice to meet you. 353 00:24:09,282 --> 00:24:11,492 Your name is Sandra? 354 00:24:11,576 --> 00:24:13,453 No, Cassandra. 355 00:24:14,370 --> 00:24:17,248 [Chuckles] That's beautiful. 356 00:24:18,166 --> 00:24:22,420 - —Thanks. - I bet a lot of people call you Sandy. 357 00:24:23,921 --> 00:24:27,091 No one's ever called me Sandy. 358 00:24:27,175 --> 00:24:29,302 No? —yeah. 359 00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:32,805 - —[Phone rings] - Excuse me. 360 00:24:34,474 --> 00:24:35,975 Cordelia press. 361 00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,770 Chap doesn't know where Louis is, 362 00:24:38,853 --> 00:24:41,230 but he said that he should be at this book party later. 363 00:24:41,314 --> 00:24:43,650 I don't know. What should we do? 364 00:24:43,733 --> 00:24:46,319 Where does Louis work? Where is his desk? 365 00:24:46,402 --> 00:24:48,946 We should take a look. 366 00:25:01,042 --> 00:25:03,544 [Rap music playing] 367 00:25:05,421 --> 00:25:07,256 I'm gonna get a paper. 368 00:25:12,970 --> 00:25:14,472 Dad... 369 00:25:17,141 --> 00:25:19,060 My mom's driving me insane. 370 00:25:19,143 --> 00:25:21,729 Oh, sweetie, you shouldn't let them bother you. 371 00:25:21,813 --> 00:25:23,481 She's so out of touch. 372 00:25:23,564 --> 00:25:26,317 - Yeah, but it's not her fault. - Why do you say that? 373 00:25:26,401 --> 00:25:28,945 I mean, it's the fate of the middle class. 374 00:25:29,028 --> 00:25:32,073 Everything about middle-class life — You know, cars, 375 00:25:32,156 --> 00:25:34,534 suburbs, strip malls, tabloid television... 376 00:25:34,617 --> 00:25:37,662 It's all designed to keep people from having meaningful interactions. 377 00:25:37,745 --> 00:25:40,373 The average American knows more about the latest maniac 378 00:25:40,456 --> 00:25:44,293 who keeps human heads in their freezer than they do about their own spouse. 379 00:25:44,377 --> 00:25:46,087 And that's a — that's — you know, that... 380 00:25:46,170 --> 00:25:48,339 Yeah, that is the big failing of a democracy. 381 00:25:48,423 --> 00:25:51,426 It tends towards the middle, towards mediocrity. 382 00:25:52,802 --> 00:25:56,097 - What's the alternative? - We'd be better off under an aristocracy. 383 00:25:56,180 --> 00:26:00,059 I know it's not a fair system, but there's never gonna be a fair system. 384 00:26:00,143 --> 00:26:05,606 At least the aristocrats had taste. They did things with class. 385 00:26:05,690 --> 00:26:08,192 Christ, they even went to the guillotine with class. 386 00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:15,074 But-but what about the rest of us, the non-aristocrats? 387 00:26:15,158 --> 00:26:20,621 Well, those of us who had the ambition and intelligence and talent 388 00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:23,040 would find ways ofjoining the aristocracy, 389 00:26:23,124 --> 00:26:25,585 and the rest, you know, those who don't give a damn 390 00:26:25,668 --> 00:26:27,712 about art and culture anyways would work. 391 00:26:27,795 --> 00:26:29,075 There's nothing wrong with work. 392 00:26:29,130 --> 00:26:32,175 I respect the working class far more than I do the middle class. 393 00:26:32,258 --> 00:26:35,803 Those people, you know, they're connected to the earth. 394 00:26:35,887 --> 00:26:39,807 They have values. They have god. 395 00:26:39,891 --> 00:26:42,977 What does the middle class have? Infomercials. 396 00:26:44,645 --> 00:26:46,397 Mm. Ugh. 397 00:26:48,483 --> 00:26:50,109 I have to pee again. 398 00:26:55,615 --> 00:26:59,118 Try and forgive your mother. She truly is the victim of a deadly system. 399 00:27:01,245 --> 00:27:04,832 I saw this on mat/00k the other night. You press the redial button, 400 00:27:04,916 --> 00:27:07,502 and then the phone rings the last number Louis called. 401 00:27:07,585 --> 00:27:09,796 - Oh, please. Mom, don't. - —[Line ringing] 402 00:27:09,879 --> 00:27:11,297 It's ringing. —[Phone rings] 403 00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:12,548 See? 404 00:27:15,551 --> 00:27:17,386 Hello, mom. 405 00:27:18,137 --> 00:27:21,182 - What is the matter with you? - This is ridiculous. 406 00:27:21,265 --> 00:27:24,936 - Don't, no. You're gonna mess up his desk. - —I'm looking, that's all. I'm looking. 407 00:27:25,019 --> 00:27:27,396 Don't touch all of his papers. 408 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:30,566 Mom, just stop. This is an invasion of privacy, okay? 409 00:27:30,650 --> 00:27:32,860 It's one thing when you used to read my diary... 410 00:27:32,944 --> 00:27:35,696 - I never read your diary. - Mom, please? 411 00:27:35,780 --> 00:27:37,281 For god's sake. 412 00:27:39,659 --> 00:27:42,537 - [Dial tone, numbers beeping] - Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 413 00:27:43,788 --> 00:27:45,665 I can't believe I'm doing this. 414 00:27:45,748 --> 00:27:48,960 [Louis] Hl; You've reached the home of Eliza and Louis. Please leave... 415 00:27:49,043 --> 00:27:51,796 [Numbers beeping, line ringing] 416 00:27:51,879 --> 00:27:53,881 [Cassandra] Cordelia press. 417 00:27:53,965 --> 00:27:55,758 Eliza, look at this. 418 00:27:59,303 --> 00:28:01,347 That doesn't prove anything. 419 00:28:01,430 --> 00:28:03,516 - —[Line ringing] - [Scoffs] 420 00:28:03,599 --> 00:28:06,143 - —Look. - Hi you've reached Sandy and Monica. 421 00:28:06,227 --> 00:28:09,647 We 're not in. Leave a message, and we'll get back to you. Thanks. 422 00:28:09,730 --> 00:28:11,482 Well, the pictures on the street, 423 00:28:11,566 --> 00:28:14,277 they're wearing the same clothes they were wearing at the party. 424 00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:15,920 - Sandy could live here. - Look at this. 425 00:28:15,987 --> 00:28:17,923 There's a restaurant in the background. You see that? 426 00:28:17,947 --> 00:28:21,826 - Oh, my g — it says "Berry's"? "Berry's"? - Yep, that's what it says. 427 00:28:21,909 --> 00:28:24,829 Wow. —I'm worried. I'm very worried. 428 00:28:24,912 --> 00:28:27,415 It still doesn't prove anything. 429 00:28:30,877 --> 00:28:32,420 375 spring street. 430 00:28:44,307 --> 00:28:47,727 There's that steakhouse we used to go to with Ken and Eileen. 431 00:28:47,810 --> 00:28:49,061 Oh, yeah. 432 00:28:51,772 --> 00:28:53,983 What if Louis is involved with this woman? 433 00:28:55,735 --> 00:28:59,405 If Louis is cheating, I can assure you it has nothing to do with love. 434 00:28:59,488 --> 00:29:00,615 I know men. 435 00:29:00,698 --> 00:29:03,576 Maybe Sandy's this really incredible person. 436 00:29:03,659 --> 00:29:05,620 [Rita] If she's so incredible, 437 00:29:05,703 --> 00:29:08,581 then why would she go after someone else's husband? 438 00:29:08,664 --> 00:29:10,499 Maybe she's desperately in love with him. 439 00:29:10,583 --> 00:29:14,086 Don't be ridiculous. Nobody's desperately in love. 440 00:29:14,170 --> 00:29:18,215 Eliza, don't worry about it. You don't know if Louis has done anything. 441 00:29:19,342 --> 00:29:22,136 It would never occur to me to write a note like this. 442 00:29:22,219 --> 00:29:26,474 Anyone can copy some 17th-century elizabethan metaphysical poet. 443 00:29:28,517 --> 00:29:30,353 You know, from a book. 444 00:29:46,327 --> 00:29:48,704 That's Berry's there. Then it has to be... 445 00:29:48,788 --> 00:29:52,249 Louis is entering a blue door. We should look for a blue door. 446 00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:55,544 We're gonna look for clues across the street, Eliza. 447 00:29:55,628 --> 00:29:56,963 [Eliza] Okay. 448 00:30:19,819 --> 00:30:21,195 Mom, look. 449 00:30:21,278 --> 00:30:22,405 What? 450 00:30:24,407 --> 00:30:26,492 Come on over here. We found it. 451 00:30:28,953 --> 00:30:31,789 Monica young, Sandy Pierce. 2A. 452 00:30:31,872 --> 00:30:33,833 What should we do? 453 00:30:34,542 --> 00:30:36,293 -Should we ring the buzzer? —no. 454 00:30:37,461 --> 00:30:39,797 Let's just wait and see if somebody shows up. 455 00:30:41,674 --> 00:30:43,801 You guys should go. I'm ruining your day. 456 00:30:43,884 --> 00:30:47,555 - We don't mind being here, do we, Carl? - God, no. Of course not. 457 00:30:47,638 --> 00:30:49,306 Thanks, guys. 458 00:30:53,769 --> 00:30:56,063 Mom almost caught us doing it this morning. 459 00:30:57,064 --> 00:30:58,941 Are you kidding me? 460 00:30:59,025 --> 00:31:00,943 I snuck into bed with Carl. 461 00:31:02,153 --> 00:31:04,405 Louis and I never did it in that house. 462 00:31:04,488 --> 00:31:06,157 Why not? You're allowed to. 463 00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:10,244 I know, but mom's always snooping around. I don't want her hearing me orgasm. 464 00:31:11,787 --> 00:31:15,875 Do it in the morning, when she's so busy letting dad have it in the kitchen. 465 00:31:19,211 --> 00:31:22,423 I hope you're taking precautions with Carl. 466 00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:26,218 Oh, yeah. We use a condom and spermicidal gooey stuff. 467 00:31:26,302 --> 00:31:27,470 Good. 468 00:31:29,638 --> 00:31:31,682 Are you still trying to get pregnant? 469 00:31:31,766 --> 00:31:35,269 Well, we were, but we kind of stopped. Louis feels he isn't ready yet. 470 00:31:39,899 --> 00:31:41,442 Can I have a cigarette? 471 00:31:48,032 --> 00:31:50,868 Why did I wear this skirt? I am so cold. 472 00:31:50,951 --> 00:31:52,953 - Don't let mom hear you say that. - [Chuckles] 473 00:31:55,831 --> 00:31:57,750 -There you go. —thanks. 474 00:32:05,716 --> 00:32:08,219 Okay, mom, you win. I am freezing my ass off. 475 00:32:08,302 --> 00:32:10,763 I think there's a coat in the back somewhere. 476 00:32:10,846 --> 00:32:13,099 [Rita] If you can find it in that mess. 477 00:32:18,145 --> 00:32:20,689 Oh, thank you, Carl. 478 00:32:21,649 --> 00:32:24,944 We have been freezing to death in here. 479 00:32:26,987 --> 00:32:29,406 [Rita] Ah! What is this? 480 00:32:29,490 --> 00:32:32,993 [Carl] It's herbal tea. I got it from the gourmet shop on the corner. 481 00:32:33,077 --> 00:32:35,746 - It's, uh, Jasmine blend. - —[Rita] Ooh! 482 00:32:35,830 --> 00:32:40,251 So, Carl, why don't you finish telling us the story of your novel? 483 00:32:40,334 --> 00:32:42,920 Oh, I don't think everyone wants to hear that. 484 00:32:43,003 --> 00:32:44,713 - Oh, come on. - I'd like to. 485 00:32:44,797 --> 00:32:47,466 [Rita] We all want to hear, Carl. 486 00:32:47,550 --> 00:32:50,261 Well, when we left off, the man with the dog's head 487 00:32:50,344 --> 00:32:52,471 had become this sort of charismatic figure, 488 00:32:52,555 --> 00:32:55,266 boldly challenging the complacency of society. 489 00:32:55,349 --> 00:32:58,018 He refers to our "pass the buck" political system as 490 00:32:58,102 --> 00:33:00,271 -a corrupt role model for the individual, —yeah. 491 00:33:00,354 --> 00:33:04,567 So he starts telling people, "stop blaming each other for your own problems 492 00:33:04,650 --> 00:33:07,653 and look within yourselves for a way to effect change. 493 00:33:07,736 --> 00:33:09,572 - Right. - Everyone is really impressed. 494 00:33:09,655 --> 00:33:11,967 People seem to have completely forgotten that he is essentially 495 00:33:11,991 --> 00:33:14,702 one-eighth German shorthaired pointer. 496 00:33:14,785 --> 00:33:16,537 Then... 497 00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:19,415 This group of far-right religious extremists 498 00:33:19,498 --> 00:33:22,209 - —plant a mail bomb in his office. - Oh, my god! 499 00:33:22,293 --> 00:33:25,004 The bomb goes off in his hands. He's rushed to the hospital. 500 00:33:25,087 --> 00:33:27,631 - It's not clear whether he will make it. - —[Jim] Hey, look. 501 00:33:35,222 --> 00:33:38,225 - What should we do? - —liza, go talk to him. 502 00:33:49,361 --> 00:33:51,822 Okay, Jim, follow him. 503 00:33:53,449 --> 00:33:55,409 [Jo] Do you think they saw us? 504 00:33:56,243 --> 00:33:57,745 [Rita] They're gonna turn. 505 00:33:57,828 --> 00:34:00,623 - You got it clear, dad. Make a right. - [Rita] Right. Right. 506 00:34:00,706 --> 00:34:02,750 [All talking at once] 507 00:34:04,418 --> 00:34:06,295 Hello! Aah! 508 00:34:07,129 --> 00:34:08,255 Go ahead. 509 00:34:08,881 --> 00:34:10,716 Go on! 510 00:34:10,799 --> 00:34:14,136 It's not red, it's Amber. Amber doesn't mean you have to stop. 511 00:34:14,220 --> 00:34:16,072 What do you want me to do, drive up on the curb? 512 00:34:16,096 --> 00:34:18,432 That was the world's shortest car chase. 513 00:34:19,099 --> 00:34:20,559 -Eliza! —rita? 514 00:34:25,272 --> 00:34:26,607 Mom! 515 00:34:30,110 --> 00:34:32,780 - —Liza, yell to him. - I can't. 516 00:34:33,614 --> 00:34:36,992 - Louis! - Louder. Louis! 517 00:34:37,076 --> 00:34:38,619 Louis! 518 00:34:38,702 --> 00:34:42,539 Louis! Louis! 519 00:34:42,623 --> 00:34:44,333 - Louis! - [Jo] Mother! 520 00:34:46,168 --> 00:34:48,754 - Where's your father? - Just cool it. He's right there. 521 00:34:48,837 --> 00:34:52,424 Get back in the car. Get back in the car. We have to follow him. 522 00:34:52,508 --> 00:34:54,593 Back in the car, you idiot! 523 00:34:55,928 --> 00:34:57,680 - [Jim] Rita! - Jesus! Look out. 524 00:34:57,763 --> 00:35:00,849 Give her some air. We need to elevate her feet. Liza, put them in your lap. 525 00:35:00,933 --> 00:35:02,935 - —Mama? - Jo, keep talking to her. 526 00:35:03,018 --> 00:35:05,271 We got to get her inside. Some place warm. 527 00:35:05,354 --> 00:35:08,524 - Don't go into the light, mom. - Jo... 528 00:35:11,110 --> 00:35:13,195 - Excuse me. Do you live here? - —yeah. Why? 529 00:35:13,279 --> 00:35:14,839 My girlfriend's mother has just fainted. 530 00:35:14,863 --> 00:35:16,740 We need to get her inside, out of the cold. 531 00:35:16,824 --> 00:35:19,868 They are good people. This is not a scam. Can you help us, please? 532 00:35:19,952 --> 00:35:22,579 -I guess I — —thank you. 533 00:35:22,663 --> 00:35:24,790 [All talking at once] 534 00:35:28,043 --> 00:35:31,130 - Dad, we need the couch. - Sit down here, Rita. Are you all right? 535 00:35:31,213 --> 00:35:33,674 - Easy, easy. - [Groaning] 536 00:35:33,757 --> 00:35:36,218 - Do you have any bottled water? - —uh, yeah. 537 00:35:36,302 --> 00:35:38,804 - —What the hell is going on here? - Dad, it's cool. Relax. 538 00:35:38,887 --> 00:35:41,432 - —What the hell is going on? - Shh! 539 00:35:41,515 --> 00:35:44,601 My girlfriend's motherjust passed out on the street. We wouldn't intrude... 540 00:35:44,685 --> 00:35:46,103 - Who the hell are you? - Excuse me. 541 00:35:46,186 --> 00:35:48,564 Ronnie, do you know any of these people? 542 00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:51,191 - —Relax, dad, all right? Here. - Sit up and drink some water. 543 00:35:51,275 --> 00:35:54,194 - Oh! Oh, my god! - How do you feel? Huh? 544 00:35:54,278 --> 00:35:56,739 I-I'm dizzy. I... 545 00:35:58,407 --> 00:36:01,410 Drink, drink. You need to rehydrate yourself, Rita. There you go. 546 00:36:01,493 --> 00:36:03,912 - She passed out? - [Jo] Yeah. 547 00:36:04,580 --> 00:36:08,167 Uh... oh, I'm sorry, you know? You caught me by surprise. 548 00:36:08,250 --> 00:36:10,544 You can't be too careful in the city, you know? 549 00:36:10,627 --> 00:36:13,756 You never know what some nut's gonna try and pull off on you, right? 550 00:36:15,841 --> 00:36:18,385 So we decided to stick around and see if she shows up. 551 00:36:18,469 --> 00:36:21,388 I mean, there was nothing else for us to do. 552 00:36:21,472 --> 00:36:24,141 Yeah, well, sure. The book party is not till 6:30, right? 553 00:36:24,224 --> 00:36:26,518 - Right. - So you got hours to kill. 554 00:36:26,602 --> 00:36:30,773 Exactly. So we decided to all sit in the car 555 00:36:30,856 --> 00:36:33,609 and wait and see who came out of the building. 556 00:36:33,692 --> 00:36:38,155 And we were all freezing to death until Carl here, this sweetheart, 557 00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:43,118 he runs out and he brings us back this really nice gourmet tea. 558 00:36:43,202 --> 00:36:45,412 - What kind of tea was that? - It was a Jasmine blend. 559 00:36:45,496 --> 00:36:48,165 So we're waiting and waiting, and finally... 560 00:36:48,248 --> 00:36:49,833 This young woman, 561 00:36:49,917 --> 00:36:52,669 the one in the photograph, comes out of the building. 562 00:36:52,753 --> 00:36:54,171 -[Man] Sandy. —[Carl] Mm—hmm. 563 00:36:54,254 --> 00:36:56,382 -With Louis. —no. 564 00:36:57,758 --> 00:36:59,718 Ohh... 565 00:36:59,802 --> 00:37:03,180 Well, that's not definitive proof that something's going on. 566 00:37:03,263 --> 00:37:07,643 Then they get into a cab, and we start following them. 567 00:37:09,395 --> 00:37:12,689 But we got stuck at a traffic light. 568 00:37:12,773 --> 00:37:14,775 - —And then? - And then my mom suddenly turns 569 00:37:14,858 --> 00:37:18,612 into Wesley snipes, jumps out of the car and chases after Louis's cab. 570 00:37:18,695 --> 00:37:20,614 It was great. It was great. 571 00:37:20,697 --> 00:37:23,742 [Rita] That's when I had my fainting spell! 572 00:37:23,826 --> 00:37:25,953 Was that something? 573 00:37:26,036 --> 00:37:28,539 Oh, my god! Oh! 574 00:37:28,622 --> 00:37:31,125 And luckily Carl stepped in, 575 00:37:31,208 --> 00:37:33,710 and he took care of everything. 576 00:37:33,794 --> 00:37:35,434 [Man] That was very quick thinking, Carl. 577 00:37:35,504 --> 00:37:38,799 Well, it's what anyone else would've done in that situation. [Clears throat] 578 00:37:38,882 --> 00:37:42,428 Oh, stop that. That's nonsense. 579 00:37:42,511 --> 00:37:45,013 This one is so hard on himself. 580 00:37:46,598 --> 00:37:49,184 I'm starving. Whatever happened to lunch, Ronnie? 581 00:37:49,268 --> 00:37:53,230 - I haven't had time to go to the store. - Why don't all of you guys stay for lunch? 582 00:37:53,313 --> 00:37:56,108 Oh, no, no, Leon. —no. I'm gonna go shopping. 583 00:37:56,191 --> 00:37:59,611 You have already put yourself out for us enough as it is. 584 00:37:59,695 --> 00:38:01,947 And I'd like to make it up to you for being, 585 00:38:02,030 --> 00:38:04,199 you know, a little confused when you came in. 586 00:38:04,283 --> 00:38:07,286 - Come on. Stay for lunch. - That is so sweet of you. 587 00:38:07,369 --> 00:38:09,663 I guess we're hungry. Are you hungry, Carl? 588 00:38:09,746 --> 00:38:12,249 - —I'm always hungry. - [Leon] Great. 589 00:38:12,332 --> 00:38:14,418 Ronnie, why don't you run down to the store, 590 00:38:14,501 --> 00:38:17,421 and you get some cold cuts for all of us for lunch? 591 00:38:17,504 --> 00:38:19,006 You know what? 592 00:38:19,089 --> 00:38:23,135 I think maybe I'll make us all some nice, hot soup. 593 00:38:23,218 --> 00:38:26,555 Huh? I'm gonna see what you have in the house. 594 00:38:26,638 --> 00:38:29,516 Are you sure, Rita? Don't you think you should rest or something? 595 00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,728 [Rita] No, I'm fine, now that I'm in from the cold. 596 00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:35,397 See, I'm no good in the cold. Thin blood. 597 00:38:35,481 --> 00:38:38,025 For the love of god, don't let her make soup. 598 00:38:39,526 --> 00:38:41,820 [Phone rings] 599 00:38:41,904 --> 00:38:43,572 I'll get it. 600 00:38:43,655 --> 00:38:45,449 You kids! 601 00:38:45,532 --> 00:38:49,244 - All you have here is junk food! - —hello? 602 00:38:49,328 --> 00:38:52,039 Chips and soda. That's all they eat, these kids. 603 00:38:52,122 --> 00:38:54,500 Hello, mom. How are you? Yeah. 604 00:38:54,583 --> 00:38:57,252 -You could use a little, uh — —shh! Shh! 605 00:38:57,336 --> 00:38:59,880 No, no. That's just one of the guys here that... 606 00:38:59,963 --> 00:39:02,799 They're over here, we're gonna play some basketball. 607 00:39:02,883 --> 00:39:06,053 No. No, I haven't heard from him. Um... 608 00:39:06,136 --> 00:39:08,972 Yeah, of c — sure, I will. Yeah, of course. You know. 609 00:39:09,056 --> 00:39:10,724 Right, look, let me, uh... 610 00:39:10,807 --> 00:39:13,936 I really got to go, 'cause we're just out the door, so let me... 611 00:39:14,019 --> 00:39:16,271 Yeah. Uh—huh. 612 00:39:16,355 --> 00:39:19,149 Yeah, okay. No, I will. I... 613 00:39:19,233 --> 00:39:21,360 - Bye, bye. - [Phone hangs up] 614 00:39:21,443 --> 00:39:24,988 Say, Rita, why don't you make a list and see what we need, 615 00:39:25,072 --> 00:39:27,074 and we'll send a couple kids down to the store. 616 00:39:27,157 --> 00:39:29,576 Oh, that sounds swell, Leon. 617 00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:34,039 Uh, is this romaine lettuce? 618 00:39:34,122 --> 00:39:36,583 - —Yeah. - Ah. Lucky guess. 619 00:39:36,667 --> 00:39:38,210 I can never tell. 620 00:39:39,962 --> 00:39:42,422 It's really nice of you and your dad to help us out. 621 00:39:42,506 --> 00:39:44,758 Oh, no problem. 622 00:39:44,841 --> 00:39:47,469 You guys spend a lot of time together? 623 00:39:47,553 --> 00:39:50,681 I don't really have much choice. He's kind of taken over the place. 624 00:39:50,764 --> 00:39:52,933 - —Oh. Oh! - Oh, boy. 625 00:39:55,310 --> 00:39:58,730 Thanks. What do you mean, he's taken over? 626 00:40:00,190 --> 00:40:01,817 Well, 627 00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:06,738 my mom and dad, they split up when I was in high school, 628 00:40:06,822 --> 00:40:10,492 he hasn't been so great about paying his alimony and child support. 629 00:40:10,576 --> 00:40:13,704 I have two younger brothers who still live at home, and... 630 00:40:13,787 --> 00:40:17,958 Anyway, uh, he's been so bad about paying his alimony 631 00:40:18,041 --> 00:40:21,336 that there's basically a subpoena out for his arrest, so, uh, 632 00:40:21,420 --> 00:40:24,298 I'm harboring a fugitive at the moment. 633 00:40:24,381 --> 00:40:26,508 [Rita] God, Leon. Kids. 634 00:40:26,592 --> 00:40:30,178 I didn't give birth to my girls till later in life. 635 00:40:30,262 --> 00:40:31,930 I had trouble conceiving. 636 00:40:32,014 --> 00:40:33,974 Novenas, everything. 637 00:40:34,891 --> 00:40:38,103 Eliza, I remember she was a breech birth. 638 00:40:39,104 --> 00:40:41,982 Excruciating. You know what I mean? 639 00:40:42,065 --> 00:40:44,693 And you. You, miss. Ha! 640 00:40:44,776 --> 00:40:47,070 She was a change-of—life baby. 641 00:40:47,154 --> 00:40:49,990 Who knew? What a shock. 642 00:40:50,073 --> 00:40:52,075 Ronnie was sort of a difficult baby, 643 00:40:52,159 --> 00:40:55,996 but, uh, he grew up to be a real quiet kid. 644 00:40:56,079 --> 00:40:57,831 - Real shy. - That's not entirely true. 645 00:40:57,914 --> 00:40:59,833 You remember when you were in the boy scouts 646 00:40:59,916 --> 00:41:02,294 and you were elected to go door-to-door to sell raffles? 647 00:41:02,377 --> 00:41:04,504 Do you remember how upset you were? 648 00:41:04,588 --> 00:41:08,091 - —Yes, I remember. - So upset I had to go with him. 649 00:41:08,175 --> 00:41:10,886 - I had to do all the talking. - Mom went with me too. 650 00:41:10,969 --> 00:41:12,888 You're not as shy now. 651 00:41:12,971 --> 00:41:16,475 Shy or not, Ronnie saved the day for us today. 652 00:41:16,558 --> 00:41:18,477 He sure did, yeah. 653 00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:20,771 He's a good kid. 654 00:41:20,854 --> 00:41:24,232 I read somewhere the experts were saying that, you know, 655 00:41:24,316 --> 00:41:27,277 shyness should be discouraged in childhood 656 00:41:27,361 --> 00:41:30,197 because it could lead to antisocial behavior. 657 00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,449 -I read it in a mag — —[Laughing] Oh, please, mom. 658 00:41:32,532 --> 00:41:34,910 I'm not making this up. Well, I don't know. 659 00:41:34,993 --> 00:41:37,579 I mean, you're not antisocial. 660 00:41:37,663 --> 00:41:39,623 Sometimes I am. 661 00:41:39,706 --> 00:41:41,333 We all are. 662 00:41:42,959 --> 00:41:44,252 Sometimes. 663 00:41:44,336 --> 00:41:47,130 You know, I've been pretty antisocial of late, 664 00:41:47,214 --> 00:41:50,717 but it's really great to have surprise guests here. 665 00:41:50,801 --> 00:41:54,096 Uh, say, would anyone want some more wine or anything? 666 00:41:54,179 --> 00:41:55,514 Thank you. 667 00:41:57,516 --> 00:41:59,017 Ronnie, what do you do? 668 00:41:59,101 --> 00:42:02,396 Um, I'm in my second year of business school, 669 00:42:02,479 --> 00:42:04,356 graduate business school at Columbia. 670 00:42:04,439 --> 00:42:06,983 Oh, that's good. Very good. 671 00:42:07,067 --> 00:42:10,153 You seem like a very nice young man, Ronnie. 672 00:42:10,237 --> 00:42:12,989 - [Jim] And smart too. - [Leon] He's a real nice kid. 673 00:42:13,073 --> 00:42:16,576 You know, I've been traveling a lot lately for the last couple of years, 674 00:42:16,660 --> 00:42:19,913 so I figured I'd come up here and spend some time and visit the kid, 675 00:42:19,996 --> 00:42:22,124 and, uh, we've been having fun. 676 00:42:22,207 --> 00:42:24,793 [Rita] Ah! 677 00:42:24,876 --> 00:42:28,338 - Um, what do you do, Eliza? - I teach fourth grade. 678 00:42:28,422 --> 00:42:31,466 It's hard, but, uh, I really love the kids, so... 679 00:42:31,550 --> 00:42:33,927 - Do you have any kids of your own? - Not yet. 680 00:42:34,010 --> 00:42:37,514 Oh, that's good, you know? I'm — uh... 681 00:42:37,597 --> 00:42:40,308 Could be messy, uh... 682 00:42:41,309 --> 00:42:43,061 You know, uh... 683 00:42:43,145 --> 00:42:45,731 -Oh. Oh, my god. —what? What? 684 00:42:45,814 --> 00:42:48,400 - I've got this excruciating pain. - —what? What? 685 00:42:48,483 --> 00:42:50,485 Arthritis. 686 00:42:50,569 --> 00:42:52,612 - [Groans] - You want some aspirin or... 687 00:42:52,696 --> 00:42:55,323 I had bursitis. I used to be a tennis pro. 688 00:42:55,407 --> 00:42:59,077 I had bursitis so bad in my shoulder I had to quit playing tennis. 689 00:42:59,161 --> 00:43:02,956 This is worse. This is my cross to bear. Oh, god. 690 00:43:03,039 --> 00:43:04,833 It's brutal, right? 691 00:43:04,916 --> 00:43:07,502 You know, Rita, I know a shiatsu pressure-point thing 692 00:43:07,586 --> 00:43:09,254 for your fingers there, if you'd like. 693 00:43:09,337 --> 00:43:11,840 - —Really? - Yeah. Here, let me show you. 694 00:43:11,923 --> 00:43:16,052 You find the pressure points and then come up along the knuckles like this, see? 695 00:43:16,136 --> 00:43:17,888 - —[Rita] Ah! - [Jim] Does that feel good? 696 00:43:17,971 --> 00:43:21,016 It works. See that? 697 00:43:24,394 --> 00:43:27,564 - —Carl's plucking my nerves. - How come? 698 00:43:27,647 --> 00:43:30,817 The way he dotes on mom is making me a little sick. 699 00:43:30,901 --> 00:43:33,069 Yeah, well, mom better chill. 700 00:43:33,153 --> 00:43:35,238 She's starting to give me a little headache. 701 00:43:36,281 --> 00:43:37,866 You want some more wine, Rita? 702 00:43:37,949 --> 00:43:40,494 Oh, my god. I shouldn't. 703 00:43:40,577 --> 00:43:43,205 -Come on. —all right. Thank you. 704 00:43:43,288 --> 00:43:46,708 Oh, my god. Carl. 705 00:43:46,792 --> 00:43:50,629 - So, um, what's next for you, Leon? - —I have a few options right now. 706 00:43:50,712 --> 00:43:54,758 I have a friend of mine in Miami, Florida, you know, in south beach. 707 00:43:54,841 --> 00:43:57,803 He wants me to come down and manage his nightclub. 708 00:43:57,886 --> 00:44:01,139 It's a real swanky place. Magicians, singers. 709 00:44:01,223 --> 00:44:04,017 So I'm just tossing around different options. 710 00:44:07,562 --> 00:44:09,815 - Jo, you're a lovely young lady. - Thank you so much. 711 00:44:09,898 --> 00:44:12,400 - All the best to you. - Oh, great. Nice meeting you, Robert. 712 00:44:12,484 --> 00:44:14,861 - Carl, good luck to you with your book. - —thank you. 713 00:44:14,945 --> 00:44:17,781 Rita, you stay out of the cold, you hear? 714 00:44:17,864 --> 00:44:20,617 Oh, Leon, what a generous man. 715 00:44:20,700 --> 00:44:23,495 - Jim, it's been a pleasure. - Leon, you're the best. 716 00:44:23,578 --> 00:44:25,539 Thank you. Eliza... 717 00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:30,001 You have your family. They can help you. 718 00:44:30,085 --> 00:44:31,711 Your family. —thanks, Leon. 719 00:44:45,308 --> 00:44:49,145 Wasn't Leon a nice guy? Salt of the earth, you know? 720 00:44:50,355 --> 00:44:54,192 Yeah, but that telephone incident. 721 00:44:54,276 --> 00:44:55,819 That was very odd. 722 00:44:55,902 --> 00:44:57,571 Gave me the willies. 723 00:44:57,654 --> 00:45:00,323 Oh, come on. I'm sure there was some reasonable explanation. 724 00:45:00,407 --> 00:45:03,952 - It wasn't any of our business. - Oh, you're probably right, Carl. 725 00:45:04,035 --> 00:45:06,079 So, should I continue with my novel? 726 00:45:06,162 --> 00:45:09,374 [Rita] Oh, yes. So dog man 727 00:45:09,457 --> 00:45:12,878 is in the hospital because of the mail bomb. 728 00:45:12,961 --> 00:45:16,339 Right, and there's this team of surgeons working around the clock, trying... 729 00:45:16,423 --> 00:45:18,717 I'm sorry to interrupt. Does this dog have a name? 730 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:20,093 Fido. 731 00:45:21,177 --> 00:45:22,888 That was hostile. 732 00:45:22,971 --> 00:45:25,098 I was kidding. I was kidding. 733 00:45:26,474 --> 00:45:28,852 His name's Noah, like in the Bible. 734 00:45:29,853 --> 00:45:34,232 So Noah survives the operation 735 00:45:34,316 --> 00:45:35,650 but loses his hands. 736 00:45:35,734 --> 00:45:39,029 Ah. So he's a man 737 00:45:39,112 --> 00:45:42,449 with a dog's head and no hands. 738 00:45:42,532 --> 00:45:44,034 Exactly. 739 00:45:44,117 --> 00:45:46,953 A pointer who can't point. 740 00:45:47,954 --> 00:45:49,039 Huh? 741 00:46:05,889 --> 00:46:07,182 We're here. 742 00:46:08,600 --> 00:46:10,602 Who's going in? 743 00:46:11,645 --> 00:46:15,065 I don't want to go in. I don't want to do this in front of Louis's coworkers. 744 00:46:15,148 --> 00:46:16,983 Jo and I could see if he's there. 745 00:46:17,067 --> 00:46:20,570 You mind, miss Malone? —no, I'd love a mintjulep right now. 746 00:46:20,654 --> 00:46:22,447 Let's go. 747 00:46:23,448 --> 00:46:25,116 [Jo] I'm so hungry. 748 00:46:26,242 --> 00:46:28,370 I couldn't take mother's soup. 749 00:46:28,453 --> 00:46:32,415 It was disgusting. This coat smells. This coat smells. 750 00:46:32,499 --> 00:46:35,961 I feel like I'm turning into grandpa, Carl. 751 00:46:36,044 --> 00:46:38,463 Ah, gross! 752 00:46:38,546 --> 00:46:40,757 I hope Norman mailer isn't here. 753 00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:42,258 - Jo? - Huh? 754 00:46:42,342 --> 00:46:44,928 - What are you doing? - I just want to look nice. 755 00:46:52,602 --> 00:46:54,854 You really think Norman mailer will be here? 756 00:46:55,897 --> 00:46:57,649 [Music playing] 757 00:46:57,732 --> 00:47:00,026 [Woman] Yes, the book is a fiction, 758 00:47:00,110 --> 00:47:04,656 but I propose it is informed by my relationship with my stepfather. 759 00:47:04,739 --> 00:47:08,243 He was sort of a cross between a Fred MacMurray and a pol pot. 760 00:47:08,326 --> 00:47:11,871 Now, that is quite a polarity, and it was quite a challenge... 761 00:47:11,955 --> 00:47:13,957 We need to open another bottle of vodka. 762 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:17,627 It seems that you've put most of the last bottle in your mouth. 763 00:47:17,711 --> 00:47:19,087 Thank you. {Door opens} 764 00:47:19,170 --> 00:47:21,172 oh, oh. People coming in. People coming in. 765 00:47:24,467 --> 00:47:27,804 Hi. I'm Aaron from cordelia press. And you are? 766 00:47:27,887 --> 00:47:30,515 I'm Jo. I'm Jo. I'm Louis d'amico sister—in—law. 767 00:47:30,598 --> 00:47:33,226 - We're looking for Louis. Is he here yet? - Oh, no, he's not, 768 00:47:33,309 --> 00:47:36,187 but put your coats in there and then help yourself to a drink. 769 00:47:36,271 --> 00:47:38,356 -I certainly am. —thanks. 770 00:47:43,486 --> 00:47:45,488 [Indistinct conversations] 771 00:47:56,916 --> 00:47:59,085 - Louis isn't here yet. - Louis isn't here yet. 772 00:47:59,169 --> 00:48:01,171 I heard him. 773 00:48:01,254 --> 00:48:04,257 - Do you want us to wait for him upstairs? - All right, dear. 774 00:48:07,052 --> 00:48:08,720 -She was a thief? —yeah. 775 00:48:08,803 --> 00:48:11,514 But, you know, I'd like to see her again. 776 00:48:11,598 --> 00:48:13,183 Really? —yeah. I mean, you know, 777 00:48:13,266 --> 00:48:15,769 if she wouldn't have a second date with me, I'd like to, 778 00:48:15,852 --> 00:48:17,896 I don't know, have her arrested. 779 00:48:17,979 --> 00:48:21,900 Aaron, I'd like you to perform a task that's vaguely associated with your job. 780 00:48:21,983 --> 00:48:23,943 Excuse us. 781 00:48:24,027 --> 00:48:26,529 Hi. Did I... Are you Louis d'amico's sister—in—law? 782 00:48:26,613 --> 00:48:28,239 -Yes, yes. —I thought, uh... 783 00:48:28,323 --> 00:48:30,492 - I'm Jo. - —I'm Eddie. How are ya? I work with Louis. 784 00:48:30,575 --> 00:48:31,951 Really? What do you do? 785 00:48:32,035 --> 00:48:34,621 Actually, cordelia press is publishing my novel. 786 00:48:34,704 --> 00:48:38,416 Wow, that's great. Congratulations. Are they doing a good job? 787 00:48:38,500 --> 00:48:41,586 Well, they're desperately trying to come up with a publicity campaign 788 00:48:41,669 --> 00:48:43,713 to make it sexy to the public. 789 00:48:43,797 --> 00:48:46,800 It's kind of like trying to make salt sexy to a slug. 790 00:48:47,926 --> 00:48:51,513 So was Aaron telling you about his little liaison with the criminal element? 791 00:48:51,596 --> 00:48:53,181 God, yeah, he was. 792 00:48:53,264 --> 00:48:55,767 I thought it was kind of weird. Don't you think weird 793 00:48:55,850 --> 00:48:59,187 when people you don't know start talking about their sexual exploits? 794 00:48:59,270 --> 00:49:00,980 It's just... you know? 795 00:49:02,774 --> 00:49:05,110 - Can I ask you something? - Sure. 796 00:49:06,820 --> 00:49:08,988 What do you think of Louis d'amico? 797 00:49:10,406 --> 00:49:12,700 I don't know. What do you think about Louis d'amico? 798 00:49:12,784 --> 00:49:14,828 I don't know. 799 00:49:14,911 --> 00:49:16,663 Carl, Eddie. Eddie, Carl. 800 00:49:16,746 --> 00:49:20,041 Eddie's having his novel published by Louis's company. 801 00:49:20,125 --> 00:49:22,335 You are? Wow, that's impressive. 802 00:49:22,418 --> 00:49:25,213 I guess Jo told you I'm finishing up a novel myself. 803 00:49:25,296 --> 00:49:26,923 No. Really? 804 00:49:27,006 --> 00:49:29,843 Yeah, yeah. I hate to talk about it though. 805 00:49:29,926 --> 00:49:33,263 - I know what you mean. - I have to find a bathroom. 806 00:49:33,346 --> 00:49:36,182 God, you have the smallest bladder on this planet. 807 00:49:36,266 --> 00:49:37,851 -Jeez. {Chuches} 808 00:49:49,445 --> 00:49:50,697 - Jo. Jo. - What? 809 00:49:50,780 --> 00:49:52,657 - You're not gonna believe who's here. - —who? 810 00:49:52,740 --> 00:49:54,617 Nick. Nick woodman. —who? 811 00:49:54,701 --> 00:49:58,329 Nick. The most important man in my life. I told you all about him. 812 00:49:58,413 --> 00:50:00,999 You know, my writing teacher that semester I spent at Cambridge. 813 00:50:01,082 --> 00:50:04,919 I want you to meet him. Uh, brilliant, brilliant writer. 814 00:50:05,003 --> 00:50:07,380 No, wait. I'll get him back. 815 00:50:10,049 --> 00:50:12,093 Well, I'm just gonna do the book tour... 816 00:50:13,469 --> 00:50:14,554 Nick! 817 00:50:15,388 --> 00:50:16,681 Nick? 818 00:50:18,474 --> 00:50:19,601 Nick? 819 00:50:19,684 --> 00:50:22,103 Hi, it's Carl from, uh, the... 820 00:50:23,062 --> 00:50:24,189 Shit. 821 00:50:27,442 --> 00:50:29,110 Nick! Nick! 822 00:50:29,194 --> 00:50:30,361 Wait, Nick! 823 00:50:32,238 --> 00:50:33,948 Nick! Wait, Nick. 824 00:50:34,032 --> 00:50:37,118 Hey, it's Carl. Carl petrovich. 825 00:51:05,647 --> 00:51:09,150 Carl thinks that democracy is the reason why the middle class is so mediocre, 826 00:51:09,234 --> 00:51:11,986 that it just naturally tends toward the middle, toward mediocrity. 827 00:51:12,070 --> 00:51:14,322 - What is he, a communist? - —no, no. 828 00:51:14,405 --> 00:51:17,533 He thinks that communism is totally unrealistic 829 00:51:17,617 --> 00:51:20,161 in the cravenness of human nature. 830 00:51:20,245 --> 00:51:23,623 [Eddie] Then what does Carl propose instead of a democracy? 831 00:51:23,706 --> 00:51:26,334 [Jo] He thinks we should live in an aristocracy. 832 00:51:26,417 --> 00:51:28,044 -[Eddie] What? —yeah. 833 00:51:28,127 --> 00:51:30,797 Carl, I was just telling Eddie what we were talking about today 834 00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:32,131 about aristocracies. 835 00:51:32,215 --> 00:51:34,342 - —Oh, yeah? - Where's your teacher? 836 00:51:34,425 --> 00:51:36,302 - —Hmm? - Where's your teacher? 837 00:51:36,386 --> 00:51:40,306 Oh, uh, he had to be somewhere. He, uh, told me to give him a ring 838 00:51:40,390 --> 00:51:42,350 before he left town. [Clears throat] 839 00:51:42,433 --> 00:51:45,770 - So what were you guys talking about? - Jo was saying that you, uh, 840 00:51:45,853 --> 00:51:49,065 think an aristocracy is preferable to a democracy. 841 00:51:50,316 --> 00:51:52,986 Well, if it were led by a-a cultured 842 00:51:53,069 --> 00:51:55,655 and enlightened ruling class, yes, I do. 843 00:51:55,738 --> 00:51:58,908 I see. What about the poor people? 844 00:51:58,992 --> 00:52:01,744 - That's what I asked. - They could work. 845 00:52:01,828 --> 00:52:04,872 Work has dignity, and there's value in work. 846 00:52:04,956 --> 00:52:09,168 Would the common folk like to give up the vote? 847 00:52:09,252 --> 00:52:10,753 [Chuckles] Oh, come on. 848 00:52:10,837 --> 00:52:14,340 You don't really think the vote has any bearing on social change, do you? 849 00:52:14,424 --> 00:52:16,884 Of course it doesn't. Republican, democrat, it doesn't matter. 850 00:52:16,968 --> 00:52:19,095 They all think like managers. 851 00:52:19,178 --> 00:52:21,848 As far as I'm concerned, bush and Clinton are interchangeable. 852 00:52:21,931 --> 00:52:25,727 They have no code of honor. At least the aristocracy had a... 853 00:52:25,810 --> 00:52:29,480 [Clears throat] A sense of, uh... You know, a code of honor. 854 00:52:29,564 --> 00:52:32,692 I think you might be overestimating the ideals of aristocrats, Carl. 855 00:52:32,775 --> 00:52:35,737 - Oh, good point. - And your take on politicians seems 856 00:52:35,820 --> 00:52:38,698 simplistically cynical, even to me. 857 00:52:38,781 --> 00:52:41,993 I wouldn't say cynical. Pragmatic, maybe. Cynical seems... 858 00:52:42,076 --> 00:52:45,121 Longing for a return of the borgias hardly sounds pragmatic. 859 00:52:45,204 --> 00:52:48,333 So what, we should just accept everything and not question the system 860 00:52:48,416 --> 00:52:50,168 like a — like a bunch of sheep? 861 00:52:50,251 --> 00:52:52,295 No, but it's ludicrous snobbery to think that 862 00:52:52,378 --> 00:52:54,630 the brilliant and cultured can be up here 863 00:52:54,714 --> 00:52:57,675 and the dumb workers down here but dignity all around. 864 00:52:57,759 --> 00:53:00,178 I'm sorry. Look, I'm—I'm, uh, 865 00:53:00,261 --> 00:53:03,306 not really in the mood for a political argument right now. 866 00:53:03,389 --> 00:53:05,683 But, Carl, do you really think it makes no difference 867 00:53:05,767 --> 00:53:08,770 whether there's a republican or democrat in office? 868 00:53:10,063 --> 00:53:12,940 I don't really think he needs any help arguing his side. 869 00:53:13,024 --> 00:53:15,026 I was asking that question myself. 870 00:53:15,109 --> 00:53:17,320 I was stating, like, my opinion and what I thought. 871 00:53:17,403 --> 00:53:19,757 I'm sorry. Forget it. Whoa, whoa. Forget it, forget it. Sorry. 872 00:53:19,781 --> 00:53:22,283 It's me. I'm a little drunk. Sorry. 873 00:53:23,576 --> 00:53:26,496 But there's one thing. There is a lot of mediocrity in the world, 874 00:53:26,579 --> 00:53:29,332 that's a given, but, uh, 875 00:53:29,415 --> 00:53:32,460 if you're a real writer, you have a choice. 876 00:53:32,543 --> 00:53:35,171 You can whine about it or you can struggle against it. 877 00:53:35,254 --> 00:53:38,633 That's where the best writing comes from — Struggling against 878 00:53:38,716 --> 00:53:42,178 your society, your conscience, your appetites. 879 00:53:42,261 --> 00:53:46,015 Frankly, I don't know if what I feel will mean anything 880 00:53:46,099 --> 00:53:48,810 to an indifferent middle-class consumer society, 881 00:53:48,893 --> 00:53:51,854 because, you know, I... I don't feel like one of them. 882 00:53:51,938 --> 00:53:53,106 Excuse me. 883 00:54:06,035 --> 00:54:08,913 Everybody, I just wanted to make sure you got a chance to meet 884 00:54:08,996 --> 00:54:12,250 our guest of honor, Amy Corinne fairbright—lebow. 885 00:54:12,333 --> 00:54:14,544 - [Applause] - Thank you, chap. 886 00:54:16,170 --> 00:54:19,006 Hi. Um, I'm sort of nervous. 887 00:54:19,090 --> 00:54:22,718 Um, thank you everyone for coming. 888 00:54:22,802 --> 00:54:26,097 Uh, anyway, I must confess I find it odd 889 00:54:26,180 --> 00:54:30,476 to be experiencing such feelings of joy in association with a book 890 00:54:30,560 --> 00:54:35,815 that is principally a devastating account of spiritual asphyxiation. 891 00:54:35,898 --> 00:54:38,568 So with that in mind, um, 892 00:54:38,651 --> 00:54:41,988 I'd like to read a selection ofjournal entries, 893 00:54:42,071 --> 00:54:43,990 um, from the year 1976. 894 00:54:45,450 --> 00:54:47,994 Where the hell is that husband of yours? 895 00:54:48,077 --> 00:54:50,329 We can't sit here and freeze to death. 896 00:54:50,413 --> 00:54:52,540 Let's go find a restaurant, some place warm. 897 00:54:52,623 --> 00:54:55,168 We'll leave a note on the car for Jo. 898 00:54:55,251 --> 00:54:57,420 Don't be stupid. 899 00:54:57,503 --> 00:55:01,507 By the time we find a place and leave a note on the car, they'll be back down. 900 00:55:01,591 --> 00:55:03,843 Why didn't you think of this an hour ago? 901 00:55:05,386 --> 00:55:07,138 Where the hell is he going? 902 00:55:08,639 --> 00:55:10,475 [Sighs] 903 00:55:11,392 --> 00:55:14,187 - What, are you gonna leave me here? - —I'ii be right back. 904 00:55:14,270 --> 00:55:16,147 Tell your father to get back here! 905 00:55:49,514 --> 00:55:52,850 [Woman] Will you hand me that bag? That's the last thing. 906 00:55:52,934 --> 00:55:55,728 But be careful. It's waterford crystal. 907 00:55:55,811 --> 00:55:57,813 -Here we go. —thanks. 908 00:55:58,940 --> 00:56:02,401 Hiya, dad. —oh, hi, kid. 909 00:56:02,485 --> 00:56:04,278 This is my daughter, Eliza. 910 00:56:05,780 --> 00:56:08,658 Listen, I hope you're not gonna leave any of this stuff unattended. 911 00:56:08,741 --> 00:56:12,703 - Somebody might steal it. - Oh, listen, I'm leaving as soon as I can. 912 00:56:12,787 --> 00:56:15,289 Actually, you could help me. 913 00:56:15,373 --> 00:56:17,875 There's something upstairs that's very heavy I have to move. 914 00:56:17,959 --> 00:56:19,794 I could use a couple of extra hands. 915 00:56:19,877 --> 00:56:22,046 Honest to god, it would only take a minute. 916 00:56:22,129 --> 00:56:24,840 - Sure! - No, let me help you. He has a bad back. 917 00:56:24,924 --> 00:56:27,969 - Ah, my back isn't so bad. - You stay and watch the car. I'll help. 918 00:56:28,052 --> 00:56:31,556 All right, but you better watch your back, especially with your occupation. 919 00:56:31,639 --> 00:56:34,850 She's a human fiy. Climbs skyscrapers. 920 00:56:36,727 --> 00:56:38,354 He's kidding. 921 00:56:39,897 --> 00:56:41,732 Well, this'll only take a minute. 922 00:56:42,942 --> 00:56:43,985 Follow me. 923 00:56:49,156 --> 00:56:52,910 Dad, thanks for driving us around all day. 924 00:56:52,994 --> 00:56:54,453 Sure, kid. 925 00:56:56,831 --> 00:56:58,249 You coming? 926 00:56:58,332 --> 00:57:00,001 You got another one. 927 00:57:01,877 --> 00:57:05,590 It's not just the elevator. The whole building smells like rat poison. 928 00:57:06,591 --> 00:57:10,219 My mother died. My sister and I are, uh, 929 00:57:10,303 --> 00:57:11,929 cleaning out the apartment. 930 00:57:12,013 --> 00:57:13,639 Oh, I'm sorry. 931 00:57:13,723 --> 00:57:18,185 Well, would've been so much easier if she'd bothered to write a will. 932 00:57:23,024 --> 00:57:24,066 Hello. 933 00:57:24,150 --> 00:57:26,444 This is Eliza. She's gonna help me move something. 934 00:57:26,527 --> 00:57:29,155 Hello. I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. 935 00:57:29,238 --> 00:57:31,574 Oh, thanks, sweetheart. 936 00:57:31,657 --> 00:57:34,577 She lasted much longer than any of the doctors thought she would. 937 00:57:34,660 --> 00:57:37,955 - —What is this? - It's the chevalier barometer. 938 00:57:38,039 --> 00:57:41,792 Our mom worked as a maid in the astoria hotel, 939 00:57:41,876 --> 00:57:44,629 and Maurice chevalier gave her this. 940 00:57:44,712 --> 00:57:48,049 - I wonder how much we can get for it. - Doris, we can't sell this. 941 00:57:48,132 --> 00:57:49,425 What's all this? 942 00:57:49,508 --> 00:57:52,386 It's mom's medication. I cleaned out the medicine cabinet. 943 00:57:52,470 --> 00:57:54,180 Well, let's split it up. 944 00:57:54,263 --> 00:57:55,806 [Sister] Okay. 945 00:57:57,808 --> 00:57:59,602 This is ampicillin. 946 00:57:59,685 --> 00:58:02,313 I could use some of that. I'm always getting sick in the winter. 947 00:58:02,396 --> 00:58:06,400 Excuse me. Can I use your telephone? I need to call my answering machine. 948 00:58:06,484 --> 00:58:09,153 Well, the plug's over there. Just follow the cord. 949 00:58:09,236 --> 00:58:12,615 [Doris] I have a small TV. I would like one like mom's. 950 00:58:12,698 --> 00:58:16,786 Now, you've already got the stereo, and you've got all the records. 951 00:58:16,869 --> 00:58:20,081 Well, that's because you weren't interested in any of those things. 952 00:58:20,164 --> 00:58:23,292 In other words, you should get whatever you want and I should get nothing. 953 00:58:23,376 --> 00:58:26,796 [Sister] You took extra pills. I'm gonna take this Tylenol with codeine. 954 00:58:26,879 --> 00:58:29,965 [Doris] No, you are not. We are splitting the Tylenol with codeine. 955 00:58:30,049 --> 00:58:33,511 - I'm gonna take these sleeping pills. - No. We'll split those too. 956 00:58:33,594 --> 00:58:35,346 What do you need sleeping pills for? 957 00:58:35,429 --> 00:58:37,640 Well, it's very hard to sleep in the city. 958 00:58:37,723 --> 00:58:38,974 All that noise? 959 00:58:39,058 --> 00:58:42,228 You do not take sleeping pills because there's some noise in the city. 960 00:58:42,311 --> 00:58:45,606 You take sleeping pills if you have a serious sleep disorder. 961 00:58:45,690 --> 00:58:49,276 Okay. Oh, my god. I've completely lost count. 962 00:58:49,360 --> 00:58:52,071 I don't know if this is your pill or it's my pill. 963 00:58:52,154 --> 00:58:54,365 You give me those. 964 00:58:54,448 --> 00:58:56,075 Tylenol with codeine. 965 00:58:57,451 --> 00:58:59,161 Amoxicillin. 966 00:58:59,245 --> 00:59:02,248 -Oh, my god! —valium. Oh! 967 00:59:03,249 --> 00:59:06,335 Doesn't she look just like Carol Anne? 968 00:59:08,254 --> 00:59:09,964 My god! 969 00:59:10,047 --> 00:59:12,383 She was our favorite cousin. 970 00:59:12,466 --> 00:59:15,094 She wore her hair like this. 971 00:59:21,225 --> 00:59:25,521 I really have to go. My dad is waiting for me downstairs. 972 00:59:25,604 --> 00:59:28,941 [Doris] Look, I need that young woman to help me move the television. 973 00:59:29,024 --> 00:59:33,279 That's the only thing I want, so I think I should really have it. 974 00:59:33,362 --> 00:59:36,073 Then I want the silver. —fine. 975 00:59:36,157 --> 00:59:39,243 My sister — She wonders why I never come to visit her. 976 00:59:39,326 --> 00:59:41,086 - Isn't it obvious? Look at her? - —[Buzzing] 977 00:59:41,162 --> 00:59:44,832 It's depressing to be around somebody like that. She's like a child. 978 00:59:44,915 --> 00:59:46,959 Well, she's your sister. 979 00:59:47,042 --> 00:59:50,463 So what? Just because she happens to be my sister? 980 00:59:50,546 --> 00:59:52,965 She might as well be somebody I met in an elevator. 981 00:59:53,048 --> 00:59:55,092 There's the elevator. 982 00:59:55,176 --> 00:59:56,886 Look out! [Exclaims] 983 00:59:58,220 --> 01:00:00,431 - We need to back around. - Look out! 984 01:00:00,514 --> 01:00:02,600 I'm not carrying your weight here. 985 01:00:03,934 --> 01:00:07,021 Ouch! I hurt my hand. Can you get that button? 986 01:00:07,104 --> 01:00:09,190 [Continues, indistinct] 987 01:00:10,357 --> 01:00:13,152 - Where the hell have you been? - We caught a double feature. 988 01:00:13,235 --> 01:00:16,322 - Ha, ha. Louis never showed. - What? 989 01:00:16,405 --> 01:00:19,033 The book party is breaking up, and Louis didn't show. 990 01:00:19,116 --> 01:00:21,243 Can you believe this? Where the hell is he? 991 01:00:21,327 --> 01:00:23,412 Maybe I should call the machine again. 992 01:00:23,496 --> 01:00:25,122 Oh, why the hell not? 993 01:00:30,294 --> 01:00:33,839 Shit. I left my bag inside the party. 994 01:00:33,923 --> 01:00:36,091 I'll go get it. —no, I'll get it. 995 01:00:36,175 --> 01:00:38,469 It's not a problem. I'll get the bag, Jo. 996 01:00:38,552 --> 01:00:41,764 You don't have to do everything for everybody, Carl. 997 01:00:41,847 --> 01:00:43,599 I don't do everything for everybody. 998 01:00:43,682 --> 01:00:46,435 You just take a very long time doing certain things. 999 01:00:46,519 --> 01:00:49,188 Well, I promise I won't take a very long time. 1000 01:00:54,485 --> 01:00:56,445 And she was sexy, you know, 1001 01:00:56,529 --> 01:00:58,739 in a Ruben-esque kind of way, right? 1002 01:00:58,823 --> 01:01:01,784 And right off the bat, she starts talking to me about sex. 1003 01:01:01,867 --> 01:01:06,121 About screwing her roommate's boyfriend in the entryway to her apartment building, 1004 01:01:06,205 --> 01:01:08,958 seducing the cable guy... [Continues, indistinct] 1005 01:01:14,839 --> 01:01:16,340 [Eddie] Hey. 1006 01:01:17,633 --> 01:01:20,302 -Is this yours? —yeah. Thanks. 1007 01:01:20,386 --> 01:01:23,556 Uh, I'm glad I got to say good-bye. 1008 01:01:23,639 --> 01:01:26,684 Have you seen the view from the bedroom? It's really worth seeing. 1009 01:01:26,767 --> 01:01:29,770 -No, I just have to — -come on. It'll just take a second. 1010 01:01:31,647 --> 01:01:33,649 There's no view. —yeah, whatever. 1011 01:01:52,376 --> 01:01:54,712 [Chuckles] I gotta go. 1012 01:01:54,795 --> 01:01:57,298 Yeah, I gotta go. I'm sorry. 1013 01:01:57,381 --> 01:01:58,507 M'Kay. 1014 01:02:03,971 --> 01:02:05,431 -Foundit -great. 1015 01:02:05,514 --> 01:02:07,391 So, you been around the block, right? 1016 01:02:09,351 --> 01:02:10,644 Okay, good night. 1017 01:02:10,728 --> 01:02:13,230 Well, um, do... 1018 01:02:13,314 --> 01:02:15,107 Look in your address book, under t. 1019 01:02:17,526 --> 01:02:19,111 - Good night. - Good night. 1020 01:02:29,997 --> 01:02:32,666 [Louis on recording] Hi honey. Ltis me. Can you pick up? Hello? 1021 01:02:32,750 --> 01:02:34,835 Eliza? 1022 01:02:34,919 --> 01:02:37,296 Where are you? 1023 01:02:37,379 --> 01:02:41,467 Well, I'm calling to say this book partyis going a little later than / thought, 1024 01:02:41,550 --> 01:02:45,554 and then chap wants me to come out to dinner with the author. 1025 01:02:45,638 --> 01:02:47,556 I think I'm gonna be a little late. 1026 01:02:47,640 --> 01:02:51,602 In fact, what / might do is stay in chap is guest room if this goes too late. 1027 01:02:51,685 --> 01:02:54,355 But, uh, I don't know. 1028 01:02:54,438 --> 01:02:57,107 Uh, I'i/ call you back in an hour or two. 1029 01:02:57,191 --> 01:02:58,943 Okay? Okay bye. 1030 01:04:10,222 --> 01:04:12,266 Do you want me to come with you? 1031 01:04:15,728 --> 01:04:17,146 No, I'll go alone. 1032 01:04:29,742 --> 01:04:31,285 [Rings] 1033 01:04:36,498 --> 01:04:38,417 [Buzzes] 1034 01:04:41,378 --> 01:04:43,130 [Rings] 1035 01:04:44,214 --> 01:04:46,508 Hello? 1036 01:04:46,592 --> 01:04:48,844 [Man] Yeah, come on up! 1037 01:04:48,927 --> 01:04:51,805 [Buzzing] 1038 01:05:03,984 --> 01:05:05,986 [Rock music playing] 1039 01:05:29,885 --> 01:05:32,471 J“ the things that / used to do j“ 1040 01:05:32,554 --> 01:05:35,432 j“ never do them no more, baby j“ 1041 01:05:38,435 --> 01:05:41,688 j“ yeah, the things that / used to do j“ 1042 01:05:42,564 --> 01:05:45,400 j“ yeah, lain't ne ver gonna do them j“ 1043 01:05:45,484 --> 01:05:47,111 j“ no more j“ 1044 01:05:48,445 --> 01:05:52,157 are you Sandy's friend? Have we met? Did you go to vassar? 1045 01:05:52,241 --> 01:05:54,827 - —No. - Oh. Do you take yoga on 10th? 1046 01:05:54,910 --> 01:05:58,330 No. —do you want a drink? I'm drinking gin. 1047 01:05:58,413 --> 01:06:01,834 In fact, I wanted to fill the whole bathtub with gin, 1048 01:06:01,917 --> 01:06:04,586 but the health-conscious contingent got here first 1049 01:06:04,670 --> 01:06:06,338 and filled it with hummus. 1050 01:06:06,421 --> 01:06:08,632 [Chuckles] Just kidding. 1051 01:06:08,715 --> 01:06:11,385 Here. Drink up. 1052 01:06:11,468 --> 01:06:15,806 There. You seem a little bit nervous, jumpy. 1053 01:06:15,889 --> 01:06:18,392 What's the matter? Some guy here you like? 1054 01:06:19,560 --> 01:06:22,354 There's a guy here I like. I like him a lot. 1055 01:06:22,437 --> 01:06:25,691 See that guy? We went out for three and a half years. 1056 01:06:25,774 --> 01:06:28,068 If he tries to pick you up, I say go for it. 1057 01:06:28,152 --> 01:06:31,238 He's a real stand-up gent. 1058 01:06:31,321 --> 01:06:33,866 And awfully good in the sack too. [Chuckles] 1059 01:06:33,949 --> 01:06:37,035 My only complaint with him is his tiny 1060 01:06:37,119 --> 01:06:39,037 "falling out of love" problem. 1061 01:06:41,165 --> 01:06:43,292 It's odd, but one might think that 1062 01:06:43,375 --> 01:06:45,711 my seeing him here for the first time 1063 01:06:45,794 --> 01:06:49,214 in, oh, roughly 1064 01:06:49,298 --> 01:06:51,550 11 months and 19 days, 1065 01:06:51,633 --> 01:06:55,053 that might have something do do with my drinking more gin and tonics 1066 01:06:55,137 --> 01:06:58,432 than a boat full of wasps at a hyannis port regatta. 1067 01:06:58,515 --> 01:07:00,684 [Chuckles] 1068 01:07:00,767 --> 01:07:03,896 That's a really cute dress you're wearing. It's really adorable. 1069 01:07:06,023 --> 01:07:08,483 Uh, so, do you know Sandy? 1070 01:07:08,567 --> 01:07:10,402 - What? - [Shouts] Do you know sand... 1071 01:07:11,778 --> 01:07:14,198 -Do you know Sandy? —oh, no, no. 1072 01:07:14,281 --> 01:07:18,493 Um, I don't really know anybody here. I was meeting some friends... 1073 01:07:18,577 --> 01:07:20,746 Well, don't leave me. 1074 01:07:26,793 --> 01:07:28,587 I'm gonna call the machine. 1075 01:07:39,306 --> 01:07:42,184 I go to school in Michigan, but I definitely... 1076 01:07:42,267 --> 01:07:45,437 I think I'm gonna be back here for Christmas break, 1077 01:07:45,520 --> 01:07:47,105 'cause I really like New York. 1078 01:07:49,274 --> 01:07:51,693 I really enjoyed talking to you. 1079 01:07:51,777 --> 01:07:53,570 I like what you had to say. 1080 01:07:54,905 --> 01:07:57,699 I don't even know you. So I'm gonna go. 1081 01:08:04,957 --> 01:08:07,042 Roland called. He, uh... 1082 01:08:07,125 --> 01:08:09,503 He wants to borrow money again. Jesus. 1083 01:08:09,586 --> 01:08:11,713 - Who were you talking to? - Nobody. 1084 01:08:12,714 --> 01:08:16,468 I was standing right here. I saw you. You were talking to someone. 1085 01:08:16,551 --> 01:08:18,262 Who? 1086 01:08:18,345 --> 01:08:20,430 I was calling the machine. 1087 01:08:20,514 --> 01:08:23,183 No, you weren't. Words were coming out of your mouth. 1088 01:08:23,267 --> 01:08:25,894 You were having a conversation. Who were you talking to? 1089 01:08:25,978 --> 01:08:28,522 I was talking to the machine. 1090 01:08:28,605 --> 01:08:31,149 You were talking to our machine? 1091 01:08:32,693 --> 01:08:34,611 Why are you lying? 1092 01:08:34,695 --> 01:08:36,029 I'm not. 1093 01:08:37,572 --> 01:08:39,116 Jo, why are you lying to me? 1094 01:08:39,199 --> 01:08:42,286 Oh, Carl, god. It's such a long day. 1095 01:08:42,369 --> 01:08:46,081 You called that guy, didn't you? You purposefully left your purse 1096 01:08:46,164 --> 01:08:49,126 so you could go back there and talk to him, didn't you? 1097 01:08:49,209 --> 01:08:52,587 - What the fuck are you doing? - Don't yell at me! 1098 01:08:52,671 --> 01:08:55,132 - You called that fucker, didn't you? - Don't yell at me! 1099 01:08:55,215 --> 01:08:57,718 Why, Jo? Why—why are you doing this? 1100 01:08:57,801 --> 01:08:59,970 Do you realize what you're doing when you lie to me? 1101 01:09:00,053 --> 01:09:02,097 Do you have any clue what trust is? 1102 01:09:02,180 --> 01:09:04,725 - —What's going on? - Go back to the car. 1103 01:09:04,808 --> 01:09:06,601 - What did you do? - Go back to the car. 1104 01:09:06,685 --> 01:09:08,895 - I didn't do anything. Jesus Christ! - Yes, you did. 1105 01:09:08,979 --> 01:09:11,356 It's like the fucking inquisition here! God! 1106 01:09:11,440 --> 01:09:13,567 Don't you talk that way to me! 1107 01:09:13,650 --> 01:09:16,194 Leave me alone. Just leave me alone. 1108 01:09:18,071 --> 01:09:22,492 I don't know what's going on here, but you better wise up. 1109 01:09:22,576 --> 01:09:24,953 Car! Is a good man, and he loves you. 1110 01:09:25,037 --> 01:09:27,372 Oh, mom — -this is no joke. 1111 01:09:27,456 --> 01:09:29,416 - Oh, please. - Carl will look after you. 1112 01:09:29,499 --> 01:09:32,044 - Save it, okay? Save it. - Carl is a good person. 1113 01:09:32,127 --> 01:09:34,212 He is dedicated to you. 1114 01:09:34,296 --> 01:09:36,840 And if you screw this up 1115 01:09:36,923 --> 01:09:40,302 by chasing after god knows what, you're a fool! 1116 01:09:40,385 --> 01:09:42,471 A fool! Just wise up! 1117 01:09:42,554 --> 01:09:46,641 You know, you don't know me, okay? So just leave me alone! 1118 01:09:46,725 --> 01:09:48,894 - You're an idiot! - Jo, can I talk to you, please? 1119 01:09:48,977 --> 01:09:51,605 Go to the car! No, I don't want to talk to you! 1120 01:09:51,688 --> 01:09:54,358 I'm sick of talking to you, I'm sick of listening to you, 1121 01:09:54,441 --> 01:09:56,193 I'm sick of you! 1122 01:09:56,276 --> 01:09:59,363 - —I'm sick of you! - Good. Find someone else to be sick of. 1123 01:09:59,446 --> 01:10:02,532 - Carl, wait. Please, Carl, please. - No, it's no use. 1124 01:10:02,616 --> 01:10:05,660 Please. I'll talk to her, okay? 1125 01:10:07,204 --> 01:10:11,083 Carl, she's a foolish girl. She always has been. 1126 01:10:11,166 --> 01:10:13,960 No, actually she's not. 1127 01:10:14,044 --> 01:10:16,088 And she needs you. 1128 01:10:16,171 --> 01:10:19,091 She needs you, Carl. Please don't go. 1129 01:10:19,174 --> 01:10:21,093 I know you love her. 1130 01:10:22,928 --> 01:10:25,472 - I have to find a bathroom. - —okay. 1131 01:10:25,555 --> 01:10:29,393 Look, so, Carl, okay, I will talk to her, all right? 1132 01:10:29,476 --> 01:10:30,602 Yes. 1133 01:10:37,025 --> 01:10:41,071 You tell me what the hell is going on 1134 01:10:41,154 --> 01:10:43,573 before you throw away the best thing 1135 01:10:43,657 --> 01:10:46,118 -that ever happened to you in your life. —you have no right! 1136 01:10:46,201 --> 01:10:50,163 You have no right giving anybody advice, mom. 1137 01:10:50,247 --> 01:10:52,833 Okay? You have no right. 1138 01:10:52,916 --> 01:10:56,253 You pushed... You pushed Eliza to marry Louis. 1139 01:10:56,336 --> 01:10:58,171 - —Now look what's happening, mom! - I what? 1140 01:10:58,255 --> 01:11:01,425 Look what's happening! You don't know anything, mom! 1141 01:11:01,508 --> 01:11:04,928 You know nothing, mom! You know nothing! 1142 01:11:05,011 --> 01:11:08,306 Come back here! Now! 1143 01:11:18,984 --> 01:11:21,778 What are you doing standing there like a bull? 1144 01:11:21,862 --> 01:11:24,448 Why don't you do something? 1145 01:11:24,531 --> 01:11:27,242 Hell, what can I do? 1146 01:11:30,203 --> 01:11:32,205 [Sobbing] You are useless. 1147 01:11:34,040 --> 01:11:35,542 Useless! 1148 01:11:43,925 --> 01:11:45,927 [Dance music playing] 1149 01:11:48,013 --> 01:11:51,099 I want you to just look over there and tell me, is he looking at me? 1150 01:11:51,183 --> 01:11:52,851 No, wait! 1151 01:11:52,934 --> 01:11:55,061 Is he looking at me? No, wait! 1152 01:11:55,145 --> 01:11:58,857 Or is he looking at the redhead with the big... 1153 01:11:58,940 --> 01:12:00,233 Okay, now look. 1154 01:12:01,067 --> 01:12:03,153 Is he looking at me? 1155 01:12:04,654 --> 01:12:07,240 Look again. Do you think he knows I'm here? 1156 01:12:08,950 --> 01:12:11,745 No, wait. Don't let him see you looking like that. You're staring. 1157 01:12:11,828 --> 01:12:15,540 - —I don't think he is. - Okay, we need some more drinks, darling. 1158 01:12:15,624 --> 01:12:17,417 [Laughs] 1159 01:12:30,222 --> 01:12:34,643 - —Monica! Hi! How are you? - Hi! 1160 01:12:41,233 --> 01:12:42,901 Where'd you go? 1161 01:12:42,984 --> 01:12:45,153 Do you know where Sandy is? 1162 01:12:45,237 --> 01:12:48,365 Oh, I think Sandy's on the roof. Do you want to go up? Perfect. 1163 01:12:48,448 --> 01:12:50,992 They got lights and everything up there. Do some dancing... 1164 01:12:51,076 --> 01:12:53,119 [Continues, indistinct] 1165 01:12:56,998 --> 01:12:59,167 We can... dance! 1166 01:12:59,251 --> 01:13:00,710 [Chuckles] 1167 01:13:06,675 --> 01:13:08,552 [Bottle clinking] 1168 01:13:12,055 --> 01:13:14,307 [Latin music playing] 1169 01:13:14,391 --> 01:13:16,393 [Chafiefing] 1170 01:14:50,320 --> 01:14:52,072 [No audible dialogue] 1171 01:14:58,536 --> 01:14:59,704 [Louis] Eliza! 1172 01:15:02,999 --> 01:15:04,668 [Bottle clatters] 1173 01:15:09,130 --> 01:15:11,716 Eliza, where are you going? Where are you going? 1174 01:15:11,800 --> 01:15:14,552 What are you doing? What are you doing in the city? 1175 01:15:15,595 --> 01:15:16,930 What are you doing? 1176 01:15:17,013 --> 01:15:19,683 What are you doing in the city? What? 1177 01:15:19,766 --> 01:15:21,393 What's the matter with you? 1178 01:15:21,476 --> 01:15:24,270 I came to this party, I came with chap, and-and, um, 1179 01:15:24,354 --> 01:15:27,774 he said, you know, he's having a party, do you want to go? 1180 01:15:27,857 --> 01:15:30,652 And I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I came. 1181 01:15:30,735 --> 01:15:34,197 Are you mad that I came to the party? You're mad 'cause I didn't tell you. 1182 01:15:34,280 --> 01:15:36,825 - —I'm sorry. - Louis, stop lying. 1183 01:15:36,908 --> 01:15:38,743 - Stop lying about what? - I saw you. 1184 01:15:40,245 --> 01:15:44,165 - You saw me what? - I saw you and Sandy... kissing. 1185 01:15:51,756 --> 01:15:53,049 [Sighs] 1186 01:15:57,053 --> 01:16:01,099 All right. Oh, god, Eliza — -don't tell me I didn't see what I saw. 1187 01:16:01,182 --> 01:16:03,852 - Let me just try to explain. - You have to explain, don't you? 1188 01:16:03,935 --> 01:16:06,646 Yes, I do, I do. You're right. Okay. Calm down. 1189 01:16:10,859 --> 01:16:13,945 Look, let me tell you some stuff that I've been... 1190 01:16:14,028 --> 01:16:16,698 That I've been trying to figure out, okay? 1191 01:16:17,741 --> 01:16:20,034 - [Sighs] - Don't touch me, Louis. Jesus Christ. 1192 01:16:20,118 --> 01:16:22,620 Okay, all right, honey, let's go some place and talk. 1193 01:16:22,704 --> 01:16:25,081 - You'll be sorry. - —no, no, no! No, no, no! 1194 01:16:25,165 --> 01:16:27,000 Wait! Wait a minute. 1195 01:16:27,083 --> 01:16:28,960 Now, wait. Eliz — come here. Wait. 1196 01:16:29,043 --> 01:16:32,881 No, no, no. Eliza, come here! Let me just talk to you for a minute. 1197 01:16:32,964 --> 01:16:36,468 - Okay? Let's just go and talk. - What in god's name is going on? 1198 01:16:36,551 --> 01:16:39,012 Jesus Christ. Rita, what are you doing here? 1199 01:16:39,095 --> 01:16:41,347 - —What is this? - Are you cheating on Eliza? Are you? 1200 01:16:41,431 --> 01:16:44,267 What is this, a family affair? Why is everybody here? 1201 01:16:44,350 --> 01:16:47,520 Did he tell you? Is he having an affair with that woman? 1202 01:16:47,604 --> 01:16:50,064 I'm asking you. You know, you exchanged vows. 1203 01:16:50,148 --> 01:16:51,775 - —No, no. - Vows, Louis. 1204 01:16:51,858 --> 01:16:54,027 I know that. I know, I know. —vows. 1205 01:16:54,110 --> 01:16:56,571 - Can I please have a moment? - —then what is the explanation? 1206 01:16:56,654 --> 01:16:59,240 - Just tell me, what is the explanation? - Louis, are you okay? 1207 01:16:59,324 --> 01:17:02,160 Oh, yes, yes. Everything's okay. Everything's fine, Sandy. 1208 01:17:02,243 --> 01:17:05,872 Just go back upstairs. Everything's fine. I'll be in there... I'll be in there... 1209 01:17:05,955 --> 01:17:07,624 I'll be in there in a minute. 1210 01:17:15,215 --> 01:17:18,384 Oh, god! —[Louis] All right. Okay. All right. 1211 01:17:18,468 --> 01:17:20,845 Oh, my god! 1212 01:17:22,013 --> 01:17:23,681 Oh, my god! 1213 01:17:23,765 --> 01:17:26,476 Eliza, can you and I go talk right now? —no! 1214 01:17:26,559 --> 01:17:29,938 Rita, will you stop? Can I please have a conversation... 1215 01:17:30,021 --> 01:17:32,732 You're garbage, that's what you are. 1216 01:17:32,816 --> 01:17:35,944 Does your mother know about her son? 1217 01:17:36,027 --> 01:17:38,613 Mrs. Malone, could you please not bring my mother into this? 1218 01:17:38,696 --> 01:17:42,242 Yeah, well, your mother has a right to know about her son. 1219 01:17:42,325 --> 01:17:45,036 No, she doesn't have every right to know! I'm a grown man! 1220 01:17:45,119 --> 01:17:48,498 - Can I have a conversation with my wife? - How could you hurt her like that? 1221 01:17:48,581 --> 01:17:50,875 How could you do this to Eliza, huh? 1222 01:17:50,959 --> 01:17:54,003 How could you do that to me? I loved you, Louis. 1223 01:17:54,087 --> 01:17:57,674 - I loved you like you were my own boy. - —I know, I know. I know that. 1224 01:17:57,757 --> 01:18:00,134 - Yes. - —and I loved you like you were my mother. 1225 01:18:00,218 --> 01:18:02,929 - Can I please talk to my wife? - Don't touch her! 1226 01:18:03,012 --> 01:18:05,557 Come on. Eliza's going with us. Get in the car. 1227 01:18:05,640 --> 01:18:08,226 [Louis] Eliza, will you please come with me? 1228 01:18:08,309 --> 01:18:11,563 Eliza, can I please have a... Can you stop staring at me, please? 1229 01:18:11,646 --> 01:18:15,066 Get in the car. Shut up! Don't you touch her! 1230 01:18:15,149 --> 01:18:17,819 Get in the car. Come on. We're going. 1231 01:18:18,778 --> 01:18:19,863 Now! 1232 01:18:27,745 --> 01:18:29,789 - Can I talk to you... - [Rita] Don't touch her! 1233 01:18:29,873 --> 01:18:32,935 - Rita, will you please let me talk to her? - —don't touch her! I'll kill you! 1234 01:18:32,959 --> 01:18:36,671 You'll kill me? Rita... Eliza, can I please talk to you? 1235 01:18:41,593 --> 01:18:43,720 Jim, let's go. 1236 01:18:43,803 --> 01:18:47,140 Eliza, you want to go? 1237 01:18:47,223 --> 01:18:49,267 What are you doing? I said, let's go. 1238 01:18:50,518 --> 01:18:53,479 I'm asking Eliza what she wants to do. 1239 01:18:53,563 --> 01:18:58,109 Oh, now, at this late hour, you're asking Eliza what she wants to do? 1240 01:18:58,192 --> 01:19:01,571 Isn't that a little strange that now you are getting involved? 1241 01:19:01,654 --> 01:19:04,365 -Why do you sit there like that? What — —shut up, Rita! 1242 01:19:04,449 --> 01:19:06,409 -You're a weak — —shut up! 1243 01:19:09,996 --> 01:19:12,749 I'll tell you what I want to do, dad. 1244 01:19:12,832 --> 01:19:15,043 And thanks for asking. 1245 01:19:15,126 --> 01:19:18,963 - I want to get the fuck out of this car. - Oh, no. Please, Eliza. Please don't go. 1246 01:19:19,047 --> 01:19:20,173 Eliza! 1247 01:19:24,594 --> 01:19:26,763 I have two idiots for daughters. 1248 01:19:29,599 --> 01:19:30,892 [Rita sniffies] 1249 01:19:32,352 --> 01:19:35,939 Honey, honey, honey, thank you. Thanks. 1250 01:19:36,022 --> 01:19:38,775 - —Okay. - Let's go some place and talk, okay? 1251 01:19:38,858 --> 01:19:41,778 Let's just talk here, because I have a few questions I want to ask you. 1252 01:19:41,861 --> 01:19:43,237 -Can you just give me... —yeah. 1253 01:19:43,321 --> 01:19:45,949 All right, now, do you think you're gay? 1254 01:19:47,158 --> 01:19:49,827 Why are you smiling at that? What is so funny about that question? 1255 01:19:49,911 --> 01:19:52,121 No, nothing's funny. No, it's just, that's a very... 1256 01:19:52,205 --> 01:19:55,291 That's a very difficult question for me to answer. 1257 01:19:55,375 --> 01:19:58,795 Okay, fine, fine, fine. Let me phrase it to you in a different way. 1258 01:19:58,878 --> 01:20:01,214 Are you having sex with this person? 1259 01:20:07,303 --> 01:20:10,682 Yes, but... yes. Yes, but I don't know... 1260 01:20:10,765 --> 01:20:12,934 How long has this been going on? —not very long. 1261 01:20:13,017 --> 01:20:14,811 Like, six months. 1262 01:20:14,894 --> 01:20:17,981 - —Six months? - Yes, but it's nothing. I mean... 1263 01:20:18,064 --> 01:20:20,441 Since December. Whenever. 1264 01:20:20,525 --> 01:20:22,527 That's a year, Louis. A year! 1265 01:20:25,530 --> 01:20:26,948 Okay. 1266 01:20:27,031 --> 01:20:29,075 Do you love this person? 1267 01:20:30,243 --> 01:20:33,329 - —I don't know. I don't even know. - Louis, wait, wait. 1268 01:20:33,413 --> 01:20:35,724 -It just turned into — —what is it like? What is it like... 1269 01:20:35,748 --> 01:20:39,210 I don't know! I don't know what it is. I don't know! I don't know what it is! 1270 01:20:39,293 --> 01:20:43,006 I don't know! I don't know! I don't know what it is! 1271 01:20:43,089 --> 01:20:46,300 I don't know! And you have to help me find out. 1272 01:20:47,010 --> 01:20:49,721 I'm confused, and you have to help me! 1273 01:20:49,804 --> 01:20:51,264 Okay? 1274 01:20:57,437 --> 01:20:59,230 I have to help you? 1275 01:21:07,530 --> 01:21:08,823 Oh, god. 1276 01:21:10,450 --> 01:21:11,868 I'm sorry. 1277 01:21:13,161 --> 01:21:14,495 Let's just go home. 1278 01:21:17,206 --> 01:21:20,043 Let's go home. Let's just go home, okay? 1279 01:21:20,126 --> 01:21:21,586 Let's just go home. 1280 01:21:29,761 --> 01:21:32,013 Where is she going? 1281 01:21:33,973 --> 01:21:35,141 Eliza! 1282 01:21:36,893 --> 01:21:37,977 Eliza? 1283 01:21:41,481 --> 01:21:42,982 I should go with her. 1284 01:21:48,946 --> 01:21:51,574 I'm sorry, Carl. 1285 01:21:52,909 --> 01:21:55,036 I'm so sorry. 1286 01:21:56,954 --> 01:21:57,997 I, uh... 1287 01:22:00,124 --> 01:22:02,168 Are you gonna be in the car? 1288 01:22:02,251 --> 01:22:05,505 Yeah, I'll stay here to make sure your parents don't kill each other. 1289 01:22:06,631 --> 01:22:08,549 How are you gonna do that? 1290 01:22:11,928 --> 01:22:15,223 Soothe them to sleep with the last chapter of my novel. 1291 01:22:17,391 --> 01:22:19,936 - —Thanks. - Go ahead. 1292 01:22:25,024 --> 01:22:26,818 [Horn honks] 1293 01:22:39,288 --> 01:22:42,083 [Southern accent] Where are you going to, miss Malone? 1294 01:22:42,166 --> 01:22:45,461 [Southern accent] There's a riverboat that'll take me out of this here city. 99855

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