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1
00:00:02,306 --> 00:00:04,206
Wendy, I had
a great time last night.
2
00:00:07,544 --> 00:00:09,201
You are a cutie.
3
00:00:09,235 --> 00:00:11,169
I ain't gonna
argue with you there.
4
00:00:11,207 --> 00:00:12,375
[both laugh]
5
00:00:13,975 --> 00:00:16,906
Yeah!
6
00:00:16,941 --> 00:00:18,605
Morning, Haskell.
Shh! Hold on.
7
00:00:18,639 --> 00:00:21,507
Just 'cause your date is over
doesn't mean mine is.
8
00:00:21,542 --> 00:00:23,209
Oh, you online
with your cyber-squeeze?
9
00:00:23,243 --> 00:00:25,111
Yeah.
We should double sometime.
10
00:00:25,145 --> 00:00:26,877
I'll bring my laptop.
11
00:00:26,911 --> 00:00:29,613
Wow, you and Rebecca
have been dating for a while.
12
00:00:29,647 --> 00:00:31,917
Seems like you guys
are getting kind of serious.
13
00:00:31,951 --> 00:00:33,621
Haskell's got a girlfriend?
14
00:00:33,655 --> 00:00:35,191
[laughs] Sorry, I didn't
mean to sound so shocked.
15
00:00:35,225 --> 00:00:37,399
You've got a girlfriend?
16
00:00:37,433 --> 00:00:39,170
What is so strange
about that?
17
00:00:39,204 --> 00:00:41,272
In fact,
we're on a date right now.
18
00:00:41,307 --> 00:00:43,007
"How is the weather
in Seattle?"
19
00:00:43,042 --> 00:00:45,147
Ah, so the girlfriend's
from Seattle, huh?
20
00:00:45,181 --> 00:00:46,215
Yep.
21
00:00:46,249 --> 00:00:47,317
So she comes here?
Nope.
22
00:00:47,351 --> 00:00:49,987
So he goes there?
Nope.
23
00:00:50,022 --> 00:00:51,089
Hang on.
24
00:00:51,123 --> 00:00:52,591
Haskell,
have you ever actually
25
00:00:52,625 --> 00:00:54,092
Been in the same room
as your girlfriend?
26
00:00:54,127 --> 00:00:55,428
Nope.
27
00:00:55,463 --> 00:00:57,266
But I spent 12 years
in the same room
28
00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:58,367
With my ex-wife.
29
00:00:58,401 --> 00:01:01,438
Trust me,
it's overrated.
30
00:01:01,472 --> 00:01:03,039
So, you've got
this girlfriend,
31
00:01:03,073 --> 00:01:04,174
But all you do
is sit around and video chat?
32
00:01:04,209 --> 00:01:05,910
No, no.
No video.
33
00:01:05,945 --> 00:01:08,148
One can express oneself
so much more intimately
34
00:01:08,182 --> 00:01:10,117
With just words.
35
00:01:10,151 --> 00:01:12,621
I don't mean to pry,
36
00:01:12,655 --> 00:01:13,923
But how do you have sex?
37
00:01:13,958 --> 00:01:16,293
Oh, there's an app for that.
38
00:01:19,031 --> 00:01:20,064
Oh, hey.
Listen, guys--
39
00:01:20,099 --> 00:01:21,099
Oh, holly. Holly.
40
00:01:21,134 --> 00:01:22,635
Prepare to be weirded out.
41
00:01:28,076 --> 00:01:29,543
All right, listen.
42
00:01:29,577 --> 00:01:31,945
Um, there's a, uh,
problem down in the laundry room
43
00:01:31,980 --> 00:01:35,048
And I need a man, phil.
44
00:01:35,083 --> 00:01:36,383
Whoa, hey,
hang on, hang on.
45
00:01:36,417 --> 00:01:38,218
I mean, how come you
automatically, you know,
46
00:01:38,252 --> 00:01:39,286
Go to Phil?
47
00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:40,587
He's not the only man here.
48
00:01:40,621 --> 00:01:42,121
Okay, fine.
49
00:01:42,156 --> 00:01:43,623
Um, there's a big,
scary homeless man
50
00:01:43,657 --> 00:01:44,690
Down in the laundry room,
51
00:01:44,725 --> 00:01:46,125
And I need help
booting him out.
52
00:01:46,159 --> 00:01:48,394
You want to get that, Phil?
53
00:01:48,428 --> 00:01:49,995
Oh, I would,
54
00:01:50,030 --> 00:01:51,698
But I'd rather sit here
and watch you squirm
55
00:01:51,732 --> 00:01:54,535
Like a scared little girl.
56
00:01:54,569 --> 00:01:58,406
All right, butch, you're up.
57
00:01:58,441 --> 00:01:59,441
[upbeat music]
58
00:01:59,475 --> 00:02:01,910
♪ do-do do do ♪
59
00:02:01,945 --> 00:02:03,946
♪ do-do dee da ♪
60
00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:06,015
♪ do do do do ♪
61
00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:10,955
That the homeless guy?
62
00:02:10,989 --> 00:02:14,058
No, Stuart, that's
the party planner from 4c.
63
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:15,126
All right.
[clears throat]
64
00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:18,063
Don't worry, I got this.
65
00:02:18,098 --> 00:02:20,933
Whoa.
That is one large bum.
66
00:02:20,967 --> 00:02:22,602
It's go time, cupcake.
67
00:02:25,106 --> 00:02:26,907
Listen, buddy.
68
00:02:26,941 --> 00:02:29,110
This--uh, this laundry room
is for tenants only,
69
00:02:29,144 --> 00:02:31,113
So I'm gonna have
to ask you to leave.
70
00:02:31,147 --> 00:02:32,347
Now, we can do this
the hard way
71
00:02:32,382 --> 00:02:33,949
Or we can do it
the easy way,
72
00:02:33,983 --> 00:02:37,253
And I, for one,
am praying for the easy way.
73
00:02:37,288 --> 00:02:38,688
I didn't mean to
upset anyone.
74
00:02:38,723 --> 00:02:40,557
I'll get out of here
right away.
75
00:02:40,592 --> 00:02:41,558
Sorry.
76
00:02:41,593 --> 00:02:43,060
No, I'm sorry.
77
00:02:43,095 --> 00:02:44,228
I didn't mean
to be such a bully.
78
00:02:44,263 --> 00:02:45,530
You know what?
Take your time.
79
00:02:45,564 --> 00:02:47,031
And finish that spin cycle,
80
00:02:47,066 --> 00:02:49,033
Or you'll never
get the wrinkles out.
81
00:02:49,068 --> 00:02:50,401
What are you doing, Stuart?
82
00:02:50,436 --> 00:02:52,303
I'm showing something
called compassion.
83
00:02:52,337 --> 00:02:54,071
By the way, sir,
I didn't catch your name.
84
00:02:54,106 --> 00:02:55,206
My name's bob.
85
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,941
Hi, bob. I'm Stuart.
86
00:02:56,975 --> 00:02:58,342
This is holly.
We live here in this building.
87
00:02:58,376 --> 00:02:59,710
Why don't you
just tell him I live alone?
88
00:02:59,745 --> 00:03:02,212
Oh, great.
Now I just told him.
89
00:03:02,247 --> 00:03:04,381
Just stop overreacting,
okay?
90
00:03:04,416 --> 00:03:06,283
He's not a threat.
[scoffs]
91
00:03:06,317 --> 00:03:08,986
Uh, here you go, bob.
92
00:03:09,020 --> 00:03:12,423
20 bucks?
Thanks.
93
00:03:12,457 --> 00:03:15,259
Why don't you
just open him up a 401k?
94
00:03:15,294 --> 00:03:17,328
Listen, stranger.
95
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:18,630
Just finish
with your business,
96
00:03:18,664 --> 00:03:20,265
And then you'd
best be moving on.
97
00:03:20,299 --> 00:03:23,969
When did I turn into
the sheriff of tombstone?
98
00:03:33,014 --> 00:03:34,147
Hey!
99
00:03:34,181 --> 00:03:35,649
What are you doing
barging in here?
100
00:03:35,683 --> 00:03:38,685
Can't you see I want
to be alone with my lady?
101
00:03:39,954 --> 00:03:41,254
Sorry. Sorry.
102
00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:43,590
Didn't realize
you were on a date.
103
00:03:45,693 --> 00:03:48,094
Ah, you're stuck
in here too, huh?
104
00:03:48,128 --> 00:03:52,466
Come on, man.
He's got a lady over.
105
00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:53,967
All right, look.
106
00:03:54,002 --> 00:03:56,136
I'm a pretty
open-minded guy, okay?
107
00:03:56,171 --> 00:03:57,571
Man and woman.
Woman and woman.
108
00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,006
Man and man.
It's all great.
109
00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:00,074
Man and laptop?
110
00:04:00,108 --> 00:04:03,010
I'm not marching
in that parade.
111
00:04:03,044 --> 00:04:04,044
Oh, God!
112
00:04:04,079 --> 00:04:06,547
No! No! No! No!
113
00:04:06,582 --> 00:04:08,516
Haskell,
is everything okay?
114
00:04:08,551 --> 00:04:10,218
Rebecca's flying
into town tomorrow
115
00:04:10,253 --> 00:04:11,386
And she wants to see me.
116
00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:13,389
Ah, well, it's about time.
117
00:04:13,423 --> 00:04:14,890
What's wrong with that?
118
00:04:14,925 --> 00:04:15,991
I don't think
she would recognize me
119
00:04:16,026 --> 00:04:18,294
From the picture I posted.
120
00:04:18,328 --> 00:04:19,528
What'd you do?
121
00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,197
Put up an old picture
of yourself?
122
00:04:21,231 --> 00:04:23,532
No, I put up a new picture...
123
00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:26,068
Of you.
124
00:04:32,380 --> 00:04:33,714
Haskell, why?
125
00:04:33,749 --> 00:04:34,982
Why would you put a picture up
126
00:04:35,016 --> 00:04:36,050
Of me and not yourself?
127
00:04:36,084 --> 00:04:37,451
Well, let's face it.
128
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:40,320
My male modeling days
are over.
129
00:04:40,355 --> 00:04:41,822
Sure, I might get
some hand and foot work,
130
00:04:41,856 --> 00:04:43,925
But the pretty is gone.
131
00:04:43,959 --> 00:04:45,560
Now we've got a big problem!
132
00:04:45,594 --> 00:04:46,728
What do you mean "we"?
133
00:04:46,763 --> 00:04:48,430
Well, she thinks
I look like you,
134
00:04:48,465 --> 00:04:49,732
Which means you're
gonna have to go on the date
135
00:04:49,766 --> 00:04:50,866
With her and tell her
that you're me.
136
00:04:50,901 --> 00:04:52,335
Even if I agreed to this,
137
00:04:52,369 --> 00:04:53,636
How am I gonna
make it through a date?
138
00:04:53,671 --> 00:04:55,639
You guys know everything
about each other.
139
00:04:55,673 --> 00:04:57,641
I'll teach you.
140
00:04:57,675 --> 00:04:58,908
I'll train you.
141
00:04:58,943 --> 00:05:02,345
I'll become your sensei.
142
00:05:02,379 --> 00:05:03,780
Before I'm done with you,
143
00:05:03,814 --> 00:05:09,052
You will eat, sleep,
and breathe Haskell Lutz.
144
00:05:09,086 --> 00:05:12,321
You trying to talk me
into this or out of it?
145
00:05:12,355 --> 00:05:14,323
Phillip,
I think these got mixed in
146
00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:16,525
With my laundry by mistake.
147
00:05:16,559 --> 00:05:18,093
Um, they're mine.
148
00:05:18,127 --> 00:05:19,661
Ooh.
149
00:05:21,764 --> 00:05:24,867
Perfect, you can wear them
on your date with Rebecca.
150
00:05:24,901 --> 00:05:26,903
You're finally
gonna meet Rebecca?
151
00:05:26,937 --> 00:05:27,904
Uh, Phil is.
152
00:05:27,938 --> 00:05:29,573
Oh, no, Phil's not.
153
00:05:29,607 --> 00:05:30,874
Check out what
this genius did.
154
00:05:30,908 --> 00:05:32,710
He posted my picture
online instead of his,
155
00:05:32,744 --> 00:05:34,478
And now he wants me
to pretend to be him.
156
00:05:34,512 --> 00:05:35,612
Can you believe that?
157
00:05:35,647 --> 00:05:37,281
That's only fair.
What?
158
00:05:37,315 --> 00:05:38,682
You owe him.
Come on.
159
00:05:38,717 --> 00:05:40,484
You think you're
easy to live with?
160
00:05:40,518 --> 00:05:42,919
How many times has this guy
had to deal with angry women
161
00:05:42,954 --> 00:05:45,456
Banging on the door because
you never called them back?
162
00:05:45,490 --> 00:05:47,457
One of them kicked me
in the crotch and said,
163
00:05:47,492 --> 00:05:51,595
"give this to phil."
164
00:05:51,629 --> 00:05:53,964
Fine.
165
00:05:53,998 --> 00:05:55,699
One date. Two drinks.
166
00:05:55,733 --> 00:05:56,933
You're buying.
167
00:05:56,968 --> 00:05:58,668
Oh, thank you!
Thank you! Thank you!
168
00:05:58,703 --> 00:06:00,337
Aww, you guys worked it out.
I'm proud of you.
169
00:06:00,371 --> 00:06:03,439
I'm raisin' me
some fine boys here.
170
00:06:03,474 --> 00:06:07,410
Now I'm talking
like a widowed rancher.
171
00:06:09,781 --> 00:06:13,016
Okay, Haskell Lutz
pop quiz.
172
00:06:13,051 --> 00:06:14,851
Rebecca and I share
a common passion, which is?
173
00:06:14,886 --> 00:06:16,786
A love of astronomy.
I always wanted to be?
174
00:06:16,821 --> 00:06:18,422
An astronaut?
Because?
175
00:06:18,456 --> 00:06:19,657
At a young age,
you realized you loved space
176
00:06:19,691 --> 00:06:20,691
And had a gift
for sitting on your ass
177
00:06:20,725 --> 00:06:21,692
For enormous periods of time.
178
00:06:21,726 --> 00:06:24,962
Ahh.
179
00:06:24,996 --> 00:06:26,630
I had the right stuff.
180
00:06:26,665 --> 00:06:28,633
Just too much of it.
181
00:06:28,667 --> 00:06:29,634
And Rebecca?
182
00:06:29,668 --> 00:06:31,469
She smells.
No!
183
00:06:31,503 --> 00:06:33,037
She's a perfumist.
Oh, right. Right.
184
00:06:33,072 --> 00:06:35,340
She creates scents.
185
00:06:35,374 --> 00:06:36,841
Which reminds me.
186
00:06:36,875 --> 00:06:38,910
Hey! Hey!
187
00:06:38,944 --> 00:06:41,546
It's the scent that Rebecca
blended especially for me.
188
00:06:41,580 --> 00:06:44,382
"summer Lutz."
189
00:06:44,416 --> 00:06:45,950
Oh, well,
I smelled Lutz last summer.
190
00:06:45,985 --> 00:06:48,853
It didn't smell
anything like that.
191
00:06:48,888 --> 00:06:50,988
Hey--ooh, nice-lookin',
phil.
192
00:06:51,023 --> 00:06:53,657
Yeah.
But no Phil here.
193
00:06:53,692 --> 00:06:56,460
For the next two hours,
I'm Haskell Lutz.
194
00:06:56,494 --> 00:06:57,895
You sure you can
pull this off?
195
00:06:57,929 --> 00:07:00,864
B.S.-Ing a woman and then
sending her on her way?
196
00:07:00,899 --> 00:07:02,500
Yeah, you're good to go.
197
00:07:02,535 --> 00:07:05,070
Stuart!
198
00:07:05,104 --> 00:07:06,438
Are you happy?
199
00:07:06,473 --> 00:07:07,873
You fed the cat,
and it came back.
200
00:07:07,907 --> 00:07:10,342
Homeless bob is down
in the laundry room again.
201
00:07:10,377 --> 00:07:12,478
Well, I'm not surprised.
202
00:07:12,513 --> 00:07:14,347
Because the stains
on his clothes are one thing,
203
00:07:14,382 --> 00:07:16,416
But there's no detergent strong
enough to remove the stains
204
00:07:16,451 --> 00:07:19,820
Society puts on a man's soul.
205
00:07:19,854 --> 00:07:21,555
Wow.
206
00:07:21,589 --> 00:07:23,356
I can't remember
the last time someone
207
00:07:23,391 --> 00:07:26,593
So completely wasted my time.
208
00:07:26,628 --> 00:07:28,628
Go toss him!
209
00:07:33,668 --> 00:07:35,535
[gasps] Haskell!
210
00:07:35,570 --> 00:07:38,038
Rebecca!
Rebecca.
211
00:07:38,073 --> 00:07:40,808
The perfumist from Seattle.
212
00:07:40,842 --> 00:07:42,342
[clears throat]
okay.
213
00:07:42,377 --> 00:07:44,345
[nervous laugh]
214
00:07:44,379 --> 00:07:45,980
I have to admit
I'm a little nervous.
215
00:07:46,014 --> 00:07:47,682
I was afraid that
when we met in person
216
00:07:47,716 --> 00:07:50,585
It wouldn't be as special
as what we have online.
217
00:07:50,620 --> 00:07:52,988
The, uh, chemistry
wouldn't be there.
218
00:07:53,023 --> 00:07:55,424
Oh, but it is.
[both laugh]
219
00:07:55,458 --> 00:07:57,059
Yeah.
220
00:07:57,093 --> 00:07:59,428
The chemistry is happening.
221
00:07:59,462 --> 00:08:02,064
The atoms are mixing.
222
00:08:02,098 --> 00:08:03,932
We got it going on.
223
00:08:03,967 --> 00:08:05,534
[laughs]
224
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:07,369
It's funny, Haskell.
225
00:08:07,403 --> 00:08:10,905
You imagine how someone's
gonna sound in person,
226
00:08:10,940 --> 00:08:14,308
And you're not it.
227
00:08:14,343 --> 00:08:17,711
Oh, well,
that's because, Rebecca,
228
00:08:17,746 --> 00:08:20,582
I'm also nervous.
229
00:08:20,616 --> 00:08:23,051
As a matter of fact,
I'm as nervous
230
00:08:23,085 --> 00:08:27,089
As that time in high school
when I was a drum major
231
00:08:27,123 --> 00:08:29,825
And I accidentally led the
marching band onto the freeway.
232
00:08:29,859 --> 00:08:32,395
Which was
a blessing in disguise,
233
00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:34,030
Because if you hadn't
gotten kicked out of band,
234
00:08:34,064 --> 00:08:37,934
You would have never
joined the diving team.
235
00:08:37,968 --> 00:08:40,737
Haskell was a diver?
236
00:08:40,771 --> 00:08:42,805
[confused]
led your team to state.
237
00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,374
Shut up!
238
00:08:45,409 --> 00:08:47,976
Haskell, I'm getting
a weird feeling.
239
00:08:48,011 --> 00:08:49,511
Something doesn't feel right.
240
00:08:49,546 --> 00:08:50,846
No, wait, no.
241
00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:53,048
Look, Rebecca,
can I be honest with you?
242
00:08:53,082 --> 00:08:54,282
Yeah.
243
00:08:54,316 --> 00:08:55,783
Okay.
Okay.
244
00:08:55,818 --> 00:08:58,019
Being here with you,
245
00:08:58,053 --> 00:08:59,988
Seeing you for the first time,
246
00:09:00,022 --> 00:09:01,055
I'm forgetting who I am.
247
00:09:01,090 --> 00:09:02,724
[chuckles]
yeah.
248
00:09:02,758 --> 00:09:05,627
But sitting here with you,
249
00:09:05,661 --> 00:09:09,065
Holding your hands
and looking into your eyes,
250
00:09:09,099 --> 00:09:10,900
I know this is right.
251
00:09:10,934 --> 00:09:12,902
That is the sweetest thing
you've ever said to me,
252
00:09:12,936 --> 00:09:14,971
Haskell rascal.
253
00:09:15,006 --> 00:09:16,640
I don't know about you,
254
00:09:16,674 --> 00:09:19,643
But this rascal
could use a drink.
255
00:09:19,677 --> 00:09:20,877
Let's order our favorites.
256
00:09:20,912 --> 00:09:22,412
Okay.
Okay.
257
00:09:22,447 --> 00:09:25,082
Um...You know what?
258
00:09:25,116 --> 00:09:26,316
Why don't you order it?
259
00:09:26,351 --> 00:09:27,651
All right.
260
00:09:27,685 --> 00:09:31,121
Two virgin lavender
lilac martinis, please!
261
00:09:33,492 --> 00:09:35,827
Flowers and no alcohol.
262
00:09:37,896 --> 00:09:40,531
Let's get this party started!
263
00:09:44,068 --> 00:09:47,037
Hi, holly.
Oh! Jeez--
264
00:09:47,071 --> 00:09:49,038
Stuart, you scared
the crap out of me.
265
00:09:49,073 --> 00:09:50,840
Oh, sorry. Sorry.
266
00:09:50,874 --> 00:09:51,841
What are you doing here?
267
00:09:51,875 --> 00:09:53,409
How did you even get in?
268
00:09:53,444 --> 00:09:55,678
Oh, I used
that emergency key you gave us.
269
00:09:55,712 --> 00:09:58,014
Stuart, that key
is only to be used
270
00:09:58,048 --> 00:09:59,882
If you haven't heard
from me in a couple days
271
00:09:59,917 --> 00:10:04,020
And there's a horrific smell
coming from underneath my door.
272
00:10:04,054 --> 00:10:06,422
Well, trust me,
I had a very good reason.
273
00:10:06,457 --> 00:10:07,791
[water running]
274
00:10:07,825 --> 00:10:10,160
Is that my shower?
275
00:10:11,963 --> 00:10:14,064
Stuart, who's in my shower?
276
00:10:14,099 --> 00:10:15,699
Well, you see,
Phil was tying up the bathroom
277
00:10:15,734 --> 00:10:17,001
Getting ready for his date.
278
00:10:17,035 --> 00:10:18,903
Oh, my god.
Haskell's in my shower?
279
00:10:18,937 --> 00:10:20,371
No. No. No.
280
00:10:20,405 --> 00:10:21,705
Of course not.
281
00:10:21,740 --> 00:10:25,008
Homeless bob is.
282
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:31,380
What is he doing
in my shower?
283
00:10:31,414 --> 00:10:32,948
Holly, I went downstairs
to kick him out,
284
00:10:32,983 --> 00:10:34,549
We started talking.
285
00:10:34,584 --> 00:10:36,018
You know, he got laid off,
his wife left him,
286
00:10:36,052 --> 00:10:37,819
He lost his money, he--
look, he just--
287
00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:40,022
He just needs a little help
to get back on his feet.
288
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,590
I want him
out of here, Stuart,
289
00:10:41,625 --> 00:10:44,326
And I want him
out of here now.
290
00:10:44,361 --> 00:10:47,363
Hello.
291
00:10:52,102 --> 00:10:53,937
Hello yourself.
292
00:10:53,971 --> 00:10:55,705
I hope I'm not imposing,
okay?
293
00:10:55,740 --> 00:10:57,107
I'll just--
I'll just go get dressed.
294
00:10:57,141 --> 00:11:00,377
No hurry.
No hurry at all.
295
00:11:00,411 --> 00:11:01,711
Um, here you go, bob.
296
00:11:01,746 --> 00:11:02,879
Actually, I-I bought you
some new clothes.
297
00:11:02,914 --> 00:11:03,880
I hope they're the right size.
298
00:11:03,915 --> 00:11:06,783
Yeah, size big.
299
00:11:06,818 --> 00:11:08,552
Thanks, Stuart.
300
00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:10,387
You know, this is gonna help me
get my life back on track.
301
00:11:10,421 --> 00:11:11,788
Step one is looking good.
302
00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:14,757
Big ol' check on step one.
303
00:11:14,791 --> 00:11:16,992
Anyways, thank you
both for your kindness.
304
00:11:17,027 --> 00:11:18,427
I meant what I said
about a new start.
305
00:11:18,461 --> 00:11:19,628
I'm not gonna disappoint you.
306
00:11:19,662 --> 00:11:22,498
Oh, god bless you, bob.
307
00:11:22,533 --> 00:11:24,133
I mean, look at you.
You're out there.
308
00:11:24,168 --> 00:11:25,634
You're starting a new life
309
00:11:25,669 --> 00:11:29,472
And keeping in terrific shape.
310
00:11:29,506 --> 00:11:31,740
You are a very caring woman.
Oh.
311
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:33,376
You know, I don't mean
to be forward, but I'm gonna be
312
00:11:33,410 --> 00:11:34,577
At that bar downstairs later,
313
00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:36,045
And I would love
to buy you a drink.
314
00:11:36,079 --> 00:11:38,314
Well, why don't you
wear what you have on
315
00:11:38,348 --> 00:11:40,683
So I'll recognize you?
316
00:11:50,594 --> 00:11:51,828
Finally, you're back!
317
00:11:51,862 --> 00:11:55,365
You were a diver?
[laughs]
318
00:11:55,399 --> 00:11:57,367
Forget about that.
Tell me about Rebecca.
319
00:11:57,401 --> 00:11:58,802
What was she like?
What did you talk about?
320
00:11:58,836 --> 00:12:00,337
What kind of scent
did she wear?
321
00:12:00,371 --> 00:12:02,039
[sniffs] oh, my god.
322
00:12:02,073 --> 00:12:04,842
Roses and hibiscus.
323
00:12:04,876 --> 00:12:05,876
Stop sniffing me.
324
00:12:05,910 --> 00:12:07,111
But the most important thing
325
00:12:07,146 --> 00:12:08,746
Is she believed you, right?
326
00:12:08,781 --> 00:12:10,482
Oh, absolutely, man.
327
00:12:10,516 --> 00:12:12,384
She's on her way back
to the airport right now.
328
00:12:12,418 --> 00:12:13,719
In a couple of hours,
you can go back
329
00:12:13,753 --> 00:12:14,853
To feeling up your laptop.
330
00:12:14,888 --> 00:12:16,622
[sighs]
331
00:12:16,656 --> 00:12:18,124
That's all I ask.
332
00:12:18,158 --> 00:12:20,392
[doorbell]
333
00:12:22,762 --> 00:12:24,763
Hi, is Haskell here?
334
00:12:32,111 --> 00:12:33,078
[knock at door]
335
00:12:33,112 --> 00:12:35,147
[groan]
336
00:12:37,150 --> 00:12:40,652
I'm sorry, but Haskell Lutz
does live here, right?
337
00:12:40,686 --> 00:12:43,922
Yes.
338
00:12:43,956 --> 00:12:45,957
Yes, he does.
339
00:12:45,991 --> 00:12:48,393
Haskell.
He live here.
340
00:12:50,563 --> 00:12:51,529
Can I come in?
341
00:12:51,564 --> 00:12:53,431
Of course!
342
00:12:53,466 --> 00:12:55,033
Come in, Rebecca.
343
00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:56,601
How do you know my name?
344
00:12:56,635 --> 00:13:00,906
I...Know everything
about you.
345
00:13:00,940 --> 00:13:03,609
Haskell! He-he talks
about you all the time.
346
00:13:03,643 --> 00:13:05,444
I'm, uh--
I'm Phil,
347
00:13:05,478 --> 00:13:08,647
His handsome, devil may care,
bed-hopping roommate.
348
00:13:10,349 --> 00:13:12,817
So, uh, Phil, could you,
349
00:13:12,851 --> 00:13:15,653
Uh, get Haskell for me?
350
00:13:15,687 --> 00:13:19,590
Of course!
Yes, uh, Haskell!
351
00:13:19,624 --> 00:13:21,691
You've got company!
352
00:13:21,725 --> 00:13:22,892
What?
Man, I'm in the middle of--
353
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,862
Ha-ha-ha!
Hey!
354
00:13:25,896 --> 00:13:27,630
Rebecca!
355
00:13:27,664 --> 00:13:29,732
I put you in a cab.
Why aren't you in a cab?
356
00:13:29,766 --> 00:13:31,400
I booked a later flight.
357
00:13:31,435 --> 00:13:32,836
I realized I wasn't
ready to leave
358
00:13:32,870 --> 00:13:34,371
After we kissed good-bye.
359
00:13:34,405 --> 00:13:36,339
Kiss?
360
00:13:36,373 --> 00:13:38,909
There was a kiss?
361
00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:41,445
Uh, Phil,
can I see you in the kitchen?
362
00:13:43,949 --> 00:13:45,717
Oh, hey.
You must be Rebecca.
363
00:13:45,751 --> 00:13:46,918
Yes, and I'm Haskell.
364
00:13:46,953 --> 00:13:51,956
I'm phil.
365
00:13:51,990 --> 00:13:55,059
Am I still Stuart?
366
00:13:55,093 --> 00:13:57,594
Of course you are.
367
00:14:00,698 --> 00:14:02,065
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?
368
00:14:02,099 --> 00:14:03,700
Okay, first,
you need to calm down.
369
00:14:03,734 --> 00:14:04,701
It's all your fault.
370
00:14:04,735 --> 00:14:08,003
I never said to kiss her!
371
00:14:08,038 --> 00:14:10,773
What sweet nectar of the gods
did her lips taste like?
372
00:14:10,807 --> 00:14:14,711
[groans]
373
00:14:14,745 --> 00:14:15,979
Oh, forget it!
374
00:14:16,014 --> 00:14:17,648
I don't want to know.
375
00:14:17,682 --> 00:14:19,817
Just being near that woman
is exquisite torture.
376
00:14:19,851 --> 00:14:21,986
All right,
I'm gonna take care of this.
377
00:14:22,021 --> 00:14:23,922
Haskell rascal
is gonna make sure
378
00:14:23,956 --> 00:14:25,857
That Rebecca
gets back in that cab.
379
00:14:25,891 --> 00:14:29,595
She used my nickname?
380
00:14:29,629 --> 00:14:33,998
She is my love, my life,
my everything.
381
00:14:34,033 --> 00:14:38,336
Now get her
the hell out of here.
382
00:14:38,370 --> 00:14:40,004
Hi, hi.
Hi, Eden.
383
00:14:40,038 --> 00:14:41,705
Uh, holly?
384
00:14:41,740 --> 00:14:43,407
Why are you wearing
a party-till-you-drop top
385
00:14:43,441 --> 00:14:45,775
With I've-given-up-hope
sweatpants?
386
00:14:47,911 --> 00:14:50,980
Because there's
this really gorgeous guy
387
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,749
Waiting for me
in the bar downstairs,
388
00:14:52,783 --> 00:14:54,517
But I'm having
second thoughts.
389
00:14:54,551 --> 00:14:57,920
About what?
Which part to jump first?
390
00:14:57,955 --> 00:14:59,655
I'm sorry,
I'm not getting the problem.
391
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:04,527
Well, you see,
he's kind of the outdoorsy type.
392
00:15:04,562 --> 00:15:07,064
H-he moves around a lot.
393
00:15:07,098 --> 00:15:08,832
Okay.
He's homeless.
394
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,533
Well, what?
Does he smell?
395
00:15:10,568 --> 00:15:11,835
Is he missing any teeth?
396
00:15:11,869 --> 00:15:14,938
Are his best friends
not really there?
397
00:15:14,972 --> 00:15:16,339
No.
398
00:15:16,374 --> 00:15:17,807
Then what are you
waiting for?
399
00:15:17,842 --> 00:15:20,076
You need to pounce on that.
400
00:15:20,111 --> 00:15:21,878
It's just that I'm torn.
401
00:15:21,912 --> 00:15:23,980
I mean, I've always had
this image of the kind of guy
402
00:15:24,014 --> 00:15:26,716
I should be with,
and I-I don't ask for much,
403
00:15:26,750 --> 00:15:28,985
But a roof would be nice.
404
00:15:29,019 --> 00:15:30,586
Holly, listen to me.
405
00:15:30,620 --> 00:15:31,921
You're a single woman
living in new York
406
00:15:31,955 --> 00:15:35,825
Who has the inside track
on a hot, available guy.
407
00:15:35,859 --> 00:15:38,961
I think it was a huge mistake
you even told me.
408
00:15:40,797 --> 00:15:42,532
You know, you're right.
409
00:15:42,566 --> 00:15:46,035
Guys who live indoors
haven't worked out so well.
410
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:47,637
Maybe it's time
to widen the net.
411
00:15:47,671 --> 00:15:49,806
I'm gonna go for it!
Oh, yeah, you are!
412
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:51,441
Wait till everyone
at the office finds out
413
00:15:51,475 --> 00:15:54,511
Your drought's finally over.
414
00:15:54,545 --> 00:15:55,812
I'm so happy,
I don't even care
415
00:15:55,847 --> 00:15:59,349
If I lose the pool.
416
00:15:59,384 --> 00:16:01,919
So this is the computer
where all the magic happens.
417
00:16:01,953 --> 00:16:04,955
The typing,
the lols, the omgs.
418
00:16:04,989 --> 00:16:09,292
You know,
where we get online funky.
419
00:16:09,327 --> 00:16:11,695
We don't need
a computer, Haskell.
420
00:16:11,729 --> 00:16:15,432
I'm right here.
Right next to you.
421
00:16:15,466 --> 00:16:19,002
Hello.
422
00:16:19,036 --> 00:16:23,440
Hello back.
423
00:16:23,474 --> 00:16:24,674
Smiley wink.
424
00:16:24,709 --> 00:16:26,943
[laughs]
425
00:16:26,978 --> 00:16:29,646
I love how
you're shy, Haskell.
426
00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:30,881
To tell you the truth,
427
00:16:30,915 --> 00:16:34,084
It brings out
the bad girl in me.
428
00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:36,053
[phone rings]
429
00:16:36,087 --> 00:16:40,857
Slowly move away
from the woman on the couch.
430
00:16:40,892 --> 00:16:43,761
I'm trying, man.
431
00:16:46,098 --> 00:16:48,366
Haskell,
we're finally together.
432
00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:49,834
You and me.
433
00:16:49,868 --> 00:16:51,869
This moment has been building up
inside of me for months.
434
00:16:51,903 --> 00:16:53,805
The wanting, the needing,
435
00:16:53,839 --> 00:16:55,807
The having to
have you take me.
436
00:16:55,841 --> 00:16:57,008
Take me now.
437
00:16:57,042 --> 00:16:59,043
You got it, baby.
438
00:17:00,413 --> 00:17:03,047
You son of a bitch!
439
00:17:03,082 --> 00:17:04,816
What the hell's
going on here?
440
00:17:04,850 --> 00:17:05,883
I'll you what's going on.
441
00:17:05,918 --> 00:17:07,552
That man is an impostor.
442
00:17:07,586 --> 00:17:09,521
He is not Haskell Lutz!
443
00:17:09,555 --> 00:17:11,690
Are you crazy,
of course he is!
444
00:17:11,724 --> 00:17:14,727
Yeah, are you crazy?
Of course I am!
445
00:17:14,761 --> 00:17:16,629
Oh, really?
446
00:17:16,663 --> 00:17:19,866
Does he know that your favorite
poem is ode to a nightingale,
447
00:17:19,900 --> 00:17:22,369
Which happens to be
your favorite bird?
448
00:17:22,403 --> 00:17:25,940
Does he know that--that you cry
when you watch comedies?
449
00:17:25,974 --> 00:17:29,743
That your favorite aunt has
a fruit farm outside Spokane,
450
00:17:29,778 --> 00:17:32,346
Where your father
proposed to your mother
451
00:17:32,380 --> 00:17:37,550
Under the watchful eye of
a three-legged dog named Scotty?
452
00:17:37,585 --> 00:17:40,019
No, of course he doesn't.
453
00:17:40,054 --> 00:17:41,421
And you know why?
454
00:17:41,455 --> 00:17:44,556
Because he isn't Haskell Lutz.
455
00:17:44,591 --> 00:17:47,459
I am.
456
00:17:47,494 --> 00:17:49,796
Oh, my god,
you are Haskell.
457
00:17:49,830 --> 00:17:53,867
Yes. It's me.
458
00:17:56,538 --> 00:17:58,539
I don't know
what kind of sick game
459
00:17:58,573 --> 00:17:59,540
You two are playing,
460
00:17:59,575 --> 00:18:03,445
But I am out of here.
461
00:18:07,885 --> 00:18:12,588
Wow.
462
00:18:12,622 --> 00:18:15,357
So how'd Scotty
lose his leg?
463
00:18:23,766 --> 00:18:25,099
Oh, bob!
464
00:18:25,134 --> 00:18:26,534
Thank god you're still here.
465
00:18:26,568 --> 00:18:27,968
I'm sorry I was late.
466
00:18:28,003 --> 00:18:30,704
I was just having
these silly little thoughts
467
00:18:30,738 --> 00:18:32,939
Because of you being,
you know,
468
00:18:32,973 --> 00:18:35,474
Roof-challenged.
469
00:18:35,509 --> 00:18:36,642
But then I just thought,
you know, why not
470
00:18:36,676 --> 00:18:37,910
Just give the guy a chance
471
00:18:37,944 --> 00:18:39,078
And look past all that?
472
00:18:39,112 --> 00:18:40,580
So here I am.
473
00:18:40,614 --> 00:18:42,048
You know, I'm sorry, holly.
474
00:18:42,082 --> 00:18:45,085
I-I met somebody else.
475
00:18:45,119 --> 00:18:47,754
Wha--
476
00:18:47,789 --> 00:18:48,789
When?
477
00:18:48,823 --> 00:18:50,157
While I was waiting for you.
478
00:18:50,192 --> 00:18:52,894
But it was only 20 minutes!
479
00:18:52,929 --> 00:18:54,863
Eden was right.
I had the inside track.
480
00:18:54,898 --> 00:18:57,466
I should have pounced!
I should have pounced!
481
00:18:57,501 --> 00:18:59,134
Look, holly,
you're a great girl, okay?
482
00:18:59,169 --> 00:19:00,769
I got some friends
I can introduce you to.
483
00:19:00,804 --> 00:19:02,171
My buddy, scratch, is single.
484
00:19:02,205 --> 00:19:05,974
Please,
I'm not that desperate.
485
00:19:06,009 --> 00:19:08,509
Have him stop
by the laundry room.
486
00:19:11,213 --> 00:19:13,547
Hi, Rebecca?
487
00:19:13,582 --> 00:19:15,015
You again?
488
00:19:15,050 --> 00:19:17,151
Just give me a minute,
and then I'll walk away.
489
00:19:17,185 --> 00:19:18,818
Okay.
490
00:19:18,853 --> 00:19:20,821
Rebecca,
491
00:19:20,855 --> 00:19:23,624
I am so sorry
about what happened.
492
00:19:23,658 --> 00:19:25,426
About deceiving you.
493
00:19:25,460 --> 00:19:27,194
It's just that
the relationship we had
494
00:19:27,228 --> 00:19:29,763
Was so special to me
495
00:19:29,797 --> 00:19:31,498
That I was afraid to lose it.
496
00:19:31,532 --> 00:19:33,767
It was special to me too.
497
00:19:33,802 --> 00:19:35,769
Haskell, the man I met online
498
00:19:35,804 --> 00:19:40,541
Was a sweet, sensitive,
smart, wonderful man.
499
00:19:40,575 --> 00:19:42,576
I am!
I'm that guy.
500
00:19:42,611 --> 00:19:45,746
I'm sorry, but you lied about
who you were for five months.
501
00:19:45,780 --> 00:19:49,483
I don't know how
I could ever trust you again.
502
00:19:49,518 --> 00:19:54,389
I just wish you would have
believed in yourself.
503
00:19:54,423 --> 00:19:55,857
Wait a minute.
504
00:19:55,892 --> 00:19:58,860
Are you saying that
if I used my own picture,
505
00:19:58,895 --> 00:20:01,830
You and I would have happened?
506
00:20:01,865 --> 00:20:04,200
Well, now we'll never know.
507
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:18,548
I'm sorry, man.
508
00:20:18,582 --> 00:20:21,217
Yep. I'm sorry too.
509
00:20:21,251 --> 00:20:23,085
You're not the only one
who had a bad night.
510
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:25,621
Holly got dumped
by homeless bob.
511
00:20:27,557 --> 00:20:29,824
I should have pounced.
512
00:20:29,859 --> 00:20:32,193
I should have pounced!
513
00:20:32,194 --> 00:20:33,240
-- Sync by Rafael UPD --
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514
00:20:33,290 --> 00:20:37,840
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