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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,070 --> 00:00:01,576 Previously on "Girlfriend's Guide to Divorce... " 2 00:00:02,180 --> 00:00:04,034 In the spirit of radical honesty, 3 00:00:04,069 --> 00:00:06,036 I am dedicated to truth from here on in. 4 00:00:06,071 --> 00:00:08,071 Becca is pregnant. 5 00:00:08,719 --> 00:00:10,102 I try to fix everybody else's stuff 6 00:00:10,137 --> 00:00:11,887 cause I don't have the first clue to fix my own. 7 00:00:11,889 --> 00:00:12,888 These belong Zooey. 8 00:00:12,890 --> 00:00:14,223 She's gonna visit Frumpkis 9 00:00:14,225 --> 00:00:15,474 and the Wicked Witch of the South. 10 00:00:15,526 --> 00:00:17,893 I'm going to hate being with Dad and the fat head. 11 00:00:17,895 --> 00:00:19,144 How do you know Dr. Harris? 12 00:00:19,196 --> 00:00:21,063 He's like an Oprah doctor. 13 00:00:21,115 --> 00:00:23,065 Today, I find out 14 00:00:23,117 --> 00:00:24,950 that he knocked up his ex-girlfriend. 15 00:00:24,985 --> 00:00:26,318 Good, I'm glad he finally 16 00:00:26,370 --> 00:00:27,402 manned up and told you. 17 00:00:27,454 --> 00:00:28,820 How long have you known Becca was pregnant? 18 00:00:28,872 --> 00:00:29,821 About a month. 19 00:00:29,873 --> 00:00:31,206 That is a huge omission. 20 00:00:31,242 --> 00:00:32,874 Okay fine, it's my fault. 21 00:00:33,480 --> 00:00:35,730 It kind of is. 22 00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:43,143 _ 23 00:01:06,734 --> 00:01:08,234 So... 24 00:01:09,764 --> 00:01:11,264 Right? 25 00:01:12,116 --> 00:01:13,365 Yeah. 26 00:01:14,065 --> 00:01:15,432 Right. 27 00:01:19,456 --> 00:01:20,872 Lilly, will you please go get your brother? 28 00:01:20,897 --> 00:01:21,873 You're late. 29 00:01:21,925 --> 00:01:23,008 - Charlie, we're late! - _ 30 00:01:23,043 --> 00:01:24,126 That's not what I asked you to do. 31 00:01:24,178 --> 00:01:26,011 Can you please go upstairs and get him? 32 00:01:27,131 --> 00:01:28,797 Hi, sweetie. 33 00:01:33,866 --> 00:01:35,082 Hi. 34 00:01:35,944 --> 00:01:37,160 Hello. 35 00:01:40,277 --> 00:01:41,643 I should've told you about Becca 36 00:01:41,645 --> 00:01:42,931 as soon as I knew. 37 00:01:43,517 --> 00:01:45,897 I am so sorry. 38 00:01:46,767 --> 00:01:47,983 It's just old Jake. 39 00:01:48,463 --> 00:01:49,746 Bad Jake. 40 00:01:49,748 --> 00:01:51,119 Not bad. 41 00:01:51,144 --> 00:01:52,549 No bad. 42 00:01:53,635 --> 00:01:55,418 A little bit. 43 00:01:55,420 --> 00:01:57,386 I just, um... 44 00:01:57,422 --> 00:01:59,255 Look, I said some horrible things too 45 00:01:59,307 --> 00:02:02,008 and, ah... I was upset, I could be very cutting. 46 00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:03,760 No, no, I'm apologizing. 47 00:02:03,812 --> 00:02:04,603 I am sorry. 48 00:02:04,628 --> 00:02:05,533 I was wrong. 49 00:02:06,347 --> 00:02:07,980 And you accepted my apology 50 00:02:08,016 --> 00:02:08,981 and let's not... 51 00:02:09,017 --> 00:02:10,399 Spend an hour revisiting 52 00:02:10,435 --> 00:02:11,934 all the awful things we said to each other. 53 00:02:11,936 --> 00:02:14,589 Yeah, that. Let's not do that one. 54 00:02:16,701 --> 00:02:18,963 - We could make out instead. - That I like. 55 00:02:18,988 --> 00:02:20,564 Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama! 56 00:02:20,588 --> 00:02:23,021 Wow! Oh, my God, Charlie, slow down! 57 00:02:23,054 --> 00:02:24,570 My butt is so itchy. 58 00:02:24,622 --> 00:02:25,654 Hi, Dad! 59 00:02:25,706 --> 00:02:26,789 Hi, itchy butt. 60 00:02:26,824 --> 00:02:28,707 Go to the car please, I'll be right out. 61 00:02:28,743 --> 00:02:30,292 What about my butt? 62 00:02:30,328 --> 00:02:31,244 We'll get to it. 63 00:02:31,269 --> 00:02:33,996 - Hurry! - Nobody cares about your butt. 64 00:02:33,998 --> 00:02:35,664 Um, hey, I was thinking, 65 00:02:35,716 --> 00:02:37,166 before Latvia, 66 00:02:37,168 --> 00:02:39,001 maybe we should go up to that place in Ojai 67 00:02:39,053 --> 00:02:40,135 for a weekend. 68 00:02:40,171 --> 00:02:41,420 We can't fix this in a weekend. 69 00:02:41,472 --> 00:02:42,588 No, of course we can't, 70 00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,673 but look, I'm going to Latvia for four months. 71 00:02:44,675 --> 00:02:47,059 You're gonna be going on glam dates 72 00:02:47,094 --> 00:02:48,477 and writing a book about divorce. 73 00:02:48,513 --> 00:02:50,012 The clock is ticking here, Abby. 74 00:02:50,014 --> 00:02:51,263 Even if I wanted to 75 00:02:51,315 --> 00:02:52,982 I have to work and you're prepping. 76 00:02:53,017 --> 00:02:54,400 Always gonna be something though, no! 77 00:02:54,435 --> 00:02:56,424 - Okay, hey! - I want to go away with you. 78 00:02:57,334 --> 00:03:00,109 How about we hole up at home? 79 00:03:00,134 --> 00:03:01,584 No kids. All weekend. 80 00:03:01,609 --> 00:03:02,575 Oh. 81 00:03:02,610 --> 00:03:04,193 Why does that seem naughty to me? 82 00:03:04,245 --> 00:03:06,111 Because how many hours do you think 83 00:03:06,163 --> 00:03:07,696 we get to spend in this house without kids. 84 00:03:07,698 --> 00:03:09,665 I think zero, zero hours. 85 00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:10,950 - None hours. - None hours. 86 00:03:11,002 --> 00:03:12,334 Great! 87 00:03:12,370 --> 00:03:13,786 And then we could, you know... 88 00:03:13,838 --> 00:03:15,621 - What? Oh. - On the couch, in the pool, 89 00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:16,622 in the garage and... 90 00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:18,958 - Garage? Are you into that? - Not that we... I... 91 00:03:19,010 --> 00:03:20,426 Not the garage, I'm just riffing on that idea. 92 00:03:20,461 --> 00:03:21,427 You know what we do? 93 00:03:21,462 --> 00:03:22,545 We send the kids with Ford 94 00:03:22,597 --> 00:03:23,796 and Lilly can help him get the cousins. 95 00:03:23,848 --> 00:03:24,880 - And no phones... - Yeah. 96 00:03:24,932 --> 00:03:26,181 Cause if something goes on with the kids, 97 00:03:26,217 --> 00:03:27,216 Ford can use the landline. 98 00:03:27,218 --> 00:03:28,934 It's old school, it's analog. 99 00:03:28,970 --> 00:03:29,935 I like it. 100 00:03:29,971 --> 00:03:30,936 Analog! 101 00:03:30,972 --> 00:03:32,187 Good. 102 00:03:32,223 --> 00:03:34,023 Oh, got to take the kids. 103 00:03:34,058 --> 00:03:35,024 Quickie in the garage? 104 00:03:35,059 --> 00:03:36,025 - No. - Kidding. 105 00:03:36,060 --> 00:03:37,026 Okay. 106 00:03:37,061 --> 00:03:38,027 - Okay. - Tonight? 107 00:03:38,062 --> 00:03:39,028 Tonight! 108 00:03:39,063 --> 00:03:40,062 I'm so excited. 109 00:03:40,064 --> 00:03:41,730 Can't wait, I love you. 110 00:03:41,782 --> 00:03:43,732 I love you. 111 00:03:46,787 --> 00:03:50,478 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 112 00:03:51,325 --> 00:03:52,291 Oh no, no, no, this is cute. 113 00:03:52,326 --> 00:03:53,375 Right? 114 00:03:53,411 --> 00:03:55,961 This is really, really cute here. 115 00:03:55,997 --> 00:03:57,246 Oh, my gosh, hi! 116 00:03:57,248 --> 00:03:58,914 Hello. 117 00:04:00,330 --> 00:04:03,782 Marria, this is Delia, my former divorce attorney and current good friend. 118 00:04:03,834 --> 00:04:05,200 - Hello, nice to meet you. - Hello. 119 00:04:05,252 --> 00:04:08,286 This is Marria, we were models and were roommates in Milan. 120 00:04:08,288 --> 00:04:09,704 I thought I recognized your face. 121 00:04:09,756 --> 00:04:10,789 Beauty. 122 00:04:10,791 --> 00:04:11,873 I know, she actually kept working 123 00:04:11,925 --> 00:04:12,874 and got really good gigs. 124 00:04:12,926 --> 00:04:13,875 For a minute. 125 00:04:13,927 --> 00:04:14,959 Now, I'm lucky if I book 126 00:04:14,961 --> 00:04:16,427 the mom in a J. Crew catalog 127 00:04:16,463 --> 00:04:17,512 because I'm like, 128 00:04:17,547 --> 00:04:18,513 33. 129 00:04:18,548 --> 00:04:19,514 Shh. 130 00:04:20,634 --> 00:04:22,300 But that's why the Blue Robin campaign 131 00:04:22,302 --> 00:04:23,768 is so empowering. 132 00:04:23,804 --> 00:04:25,186 You have to do this with me, Phoebe. 133 00:04:25,222 --> 00:04:26,604 I got a call today, 134 00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:28,139 along with the beauty here, 135 00:04:28,141 --> 00:04:29,808 to maybe be in this year's 136 00:04:29,860 --> 00:04:32,143 all-natural gal campaign. 137 00:04:32,195 --> 00:04:34,729 The all-natural woman at any age ads? 138 00:04:34,781 --> 00:04:35,730 That's enormous! 139 00:04:35,782 --> 00:04:36,731 Right? 140 00:04:36,783 --> 00:04:38,483 So powerful, it's positive, 141 00:04:38,535 --> 00:04:40,535 raw, real, minimal makeup, no Photoshop. 142 00:04:40,570 --> 00:04:41,536 Terrifying. 143 00:04:41,571 --> 00:04:42,987 Come on, you look amazing. 144 00:04:42,989 --> 00:04:44,205 I don't know. 145 00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:46,074 My modeling years were not the best memories. 146 00:04:46,126 --> 00:04:47,542 And these are test shots, right? 147 00:04:47,577 --> 00:04:49,711 So only one of us actually gets the job. 148 00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:51,220 Come on, it'll be fun. 149 00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:54,249 I'm with Marria, give it a shot. 150 00:04:54,301 --> 00:04:56,417 Anyway I got to run, I'm going house hunting with Gordon 151 00:04:56,469 --> 00:04:57,418 Oh, that's fun. 152 00:04:57,470 --> 00:04:58,636 Enough of this wedding B.S. 153 00:04:58,672 --> 00:04:59,838 Let's just, get on the real life, right? 154 00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:00,603 Do it. 155 00:05:00,628 --> 00:05:01,628 We on for dinner? 156 00:05:01,653 --> 00:05:04,392 Oh yeah, you bet your fine ass we are. 157 00:05:04,427 --> 00:05:05,393 - See you later. - Nice to meet you. 158 00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:06,928 Nice to meet you too. 159 00:05:06,980 --> 00:05:08,513 So is the food good at least? 160 00:05:08,565 --> 00:05:11,349 Deep-fried NASCAR pickles or whatever. 161 00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:12,901 I can't wait to come home tomorrow. 162 00:05:12,936 --> 00:05:14,769 Charlene is the worst. 163 00:05:14,821 --> 00:05:16,187 I hate her. 164 00:05:16,189 --> 00:05:18,273 Oh, honey, I'm so sorry to hear that. 165 00:05:18,325 --> 00:05:19,574 How's the paradise place? 166 00:05:19,609 --> 00:05:20,942 It's great! 167 00:05:20,994 --> 00:05:22,410 It's like we work for IBM in the '80s. 168 00:05:22,445 --> 00:05:24,412 - Ew. - Kidding. 169 00:05:24,447 --> 00:05:25,447 It's fun. 170 00:05:25,498 --> 00:05:26,781 Ping-pong and a swimming pool, 171 00:05:26,833 --> 00:05:30,001 and Uncle Jake lives in one of the lesser areas. 172 00:05:30,036 --> 00:05:31,920 It's like the Paradiso ghetto. 173 00:05:31,955 --> 00:05:33,371 I thought you hate Uncle Jake. 174 00:05:33,396 --> 00:05:35,396 No it's good to keep your enemies where you can see them, 175 00:05:35,421 --> 00:05:36,804 my little southern belle. 176 00:05:36,877 --> 00:05:39,177 Well, I can see mine perfectly. 177 00:05:39,212 --> 00:05:40,212 Ugh. 178 00:05:41,493 --> 00:05:43,025 Hang in there, okay? 179 00:05:43,050 --> 00:05:44,516 You're almost home. 180 00:05:46,759 --> 00:05:47,845 I love you. 181 00:05:53,417 --> 00:05:54,583 And here's your perfect kitchen. 182 00:05:54,728 --> 00:05:56,394 Don't look at me, sweetie. 183 00:05:56,396 --> 00:05:57,812 It's perfect for my chef. 184 00:05:57,837 --> 00:05:59,871 Oh yes. of course. 185 00:06:02,731 --> 00:06:04,781 Nice, nice home office for you. 186 00:06:04,806 --> 00:06:05,772 Do we like? 187 00:06:05,797 --> 00:06:07,764 We love. 188 00:06:08,964 --> 00:06:11,598 Now, this is the 19th century configuration 189 00:06:11,828 --> 00:06:13,161 of bedroom for each. 190 00:06:13,213 --> 00:06:14,220 Each what? 191 00:06:14,245 --> 00:06:15,220 Person. 192 00:06:15,889 --> 00:06:17,055 Oh. 193 00:06:17,217 --> 00:06:19,250 Huh, I didn't know that was a thing. 194 00:06:19,252 --> 00:06:20,314 Oh, yes. 195 00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:21,400 It's become popular. The... 196 00:06:21,425 --> 00:06:22,744 "Downton Abbey" style. 197 00:06:23,926 --> 00:06:25,426 But a lot of folks prefer the single. 198 00:06:25,451 --> 00:06:26,950 No, I... I kind of love it. 199 00:06:26,975 --> 00:06:27,974 I love the idea. 200 00:06:27,999 --> 00:06:29,197 It's very regal. 201 00:06:30,514 --> 00:06:34,216 You love separate bedrooms, really? 202 00:06:34,241 --> 00:06:35,824 Insomniac. 203 00:06:36,019 --> 00:06:38,019 Teeth grinder, duvet hogger. 204 00:06:38,044 --> 00:06:40,544 Oh, what about warts and all? 205 00:06:40,569 --> 00:06:41,900 I don't know, I just... 206 00:06:42,531 --> 00:06:43,931 it seems kind of romantic. 207 00:06:44,916 --> 00:06:48,585 Or the opposite of romantic? 208 00:06:48,832 --> 00:06:50,448 It's nice to have the option, right? 209 00:06:50,473 --> 00:06:52,423 I think the bidets are African ivory. 210 00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:54,619 Maybe before poaching was illegal of course. 211 00:06:54,644 --> 00:06:56,427 Too late now! Come see. 212 00:07:01,363 --> 00:07:02,713 Abby? 213 00:07:05,835 --> 00:07:07,001 Abs! 214 00:07:08,498 --> 00:07:10,248 Colder. 215 00:07:10,384 --> 00:07:11,717 Warmer. 216 00:07:12,394 --> 00:07:13,760 Warmer. 217 00:07:15,330 --> 00:07:17,080 Holy shit. 218 00:07:17,777 --> 00:07:19,060 Last one naked gets to do 219 00:07:19,112 --> 00:07:20,111 whatever the other one wants. 220 00:07:20,146 --> 00:07:21,229 That's a win-win. 221 00:07:21,281 --> 00:07:22,447 I know. 222 00:07:29,555 --> 00:07:31,555 That's the loudest sex we've ever had. 223 00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:32,529 Definitely. 224 00:07:34,776 --> 00:07:35,724 Radical honesty. 225 00:07:35,777 --> 00:07:36,725 Oh, no. 226 00:07:36,778 --> 00:07:37,760 What? 227 00:07:37,795 --> 00:07:39,228 I would like my husband slash 228 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:40,813 ex-husband to make me a drink. 229 00:07:40,865 --> 00:07:42,731 Oh, yeah? 230 00:07:42,733 --> 00:07:43,732 Yeah. 231 00:07:43,734 --> 00:07:45,067 Honesty. 232 00:07:45,069 --> 00:07:46,569 - That's right. - Love it! 233 00:07:46,571 --> 00:07:47,653 You know seriously, 234 00:07:47,705 --> 00:07:49,705 I love the conversation we had this morning. 235 00:07:49,740 --> 00:07:50,906 Yeah, me too. 236 00:07:50,908 --> 00:07:54,410 We apologized, we moved on, and... 237 00:07:54,462 --> 00:07:55,911 We didn't rehash every argument we've had 238 00:07:55,913 --> 00:07:56,912 for the last 20 years. 239 00:07:56,914 --> 00:07:57,913 Exactly. 240 00:07:57,915 --> 00:07:59,215 Radical honesty, 241 00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:00,583 and then we let it go. 242 00:08:00,635 --> 00:08:02,218 Let it go. 243 00:08:02,253 --> 00:08:03,586 No! 244 00:08:04,463 --> 00:08:05,962 Don't sing that song. 245 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,166 Fine. 246 00:08:08,191 --> 00:08:09,407 You get my point? 247 00:08:09,432 --> 00:08:10,642 I do. 248 00:08:11,454 --> 00:08:13,002 Oh, what's in this? 249 00:08:13,027 --> 00:08:13,976 Good stuff. 250 00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:15,181 Radical honesty. 251 00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:16,150 Cheers. 252 00:08:17,077 --> 00:08:18,627 So were you in love with Nate? 253 00:08:21,155 --> 00:08:22,104 What? 254 00:08:22,129 --> 00:08:23,462 Okay, I'm letting it go. 255 00:08:23,487 --> 00:08:24,903 Most of it. 256 00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:26,442 But, you know, you told me about the Will thing, 257 00:08:26,494 --> 00:08:28,777 and that somehow got me back to Nate 258 00:08:29,559 --> 00:08:31,290 and were you in love with Nate. 259 00:08:32,514 --> 00:08:34,013 Okay. 260 00:08:34,038 --> 00:08:35,871 No, I was not in love with Nate. 261 00:08:35,896 --> 00:08:37,479 It was not about that. 262 00:08:37,655 --> 00:08:39,288 I think I just needed someone 263 00:08:39,313 --> 00:08:40,806 to tell me I'm beautiful 264 00:08:40,831 --> 00:08:43,332 and funny, smart. 265 00:08:43,628 --> 00:08:45,752 I needed somebody to give me cookies. 266 00:08:45,919 --> 00:08:47,218 Some ego cookies. 267 00:08:47,759 --> 00:08:49,465 I wasn't giving out many of those. 268 00:08:49,517 --> 00:08:50,549 I'm sorry. 269 00:08:50,601 --> 00:08:51,634 Yeah, well, 270 00:08:51,636 --> 00:08:53,052 I do demand a lot of cookies. 271 00:08:53,104 --> 00:08:54,303 Indeed you do. 272 00:08:54,328 --> 00:08:56,495 Y'know I was little, I cookie-starved myself... 273 00:08:56,557 --> 00:08:58,307 Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. 274 00:08:58,309 --> 00:09:00,476 - Mmm. - I just think as time goes by 275 00:09:00,478 --> 00:09:02,645 eventually it's like you can't see each other. 276 00:09:02,697 --> 00:09:03,729 Not the way other people do. 277 00:09:03,781 --> 00:09:04,892 Mm-hmm. 278 00:09:07,618 --> 00:09:08,900 Well, I see you now. 279 00:09:08,925 --> 00:09:09,958 What? 280 00:09:11,706 --> 00:09:13,739 Yeah in fact, I would like... 281 00:09:13,791 --> 00:09:15,824 - Oh! - To see you lay all over... 282 00:09:15,826 --> 00:09:17,209 Oh, my God! 283 00:09:17,245 --> 00:09:18,994 Our dining room table. 284 00:09:18,996 --> 00:09:20,212 Whoa! 285 00:09:22,833 --> 00:09:24,800 We're gonna about 30 seconds 286 00:09:24,835 --> 00:09:25,968 before you get all Hazmat-y 287 00:09:26,003 --> 00:09:27,169 and have to clean this table up. 288 00:09:27,171 --> 00:09:28,504 You have always underestimated 289 00:09:28,506 --> 00:09:29,889 my tolerance for disorder. 290 00:09:29,924 --> 00:09:31,173 Oh, I have? 291 00:09:31,198 --> 00:09:32,314 Yeah. 292 00:09:33,886 --> 00:09:35,052 So like 293 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:37,455 if I... 294 00:09:39,967 --> 00:09:41,550 If I just 295 00:09:41,954 --> 00:09:43,320 dropped this egg on the floor, 296 00:09:43,345 --> 00:09:44,794 that'd be cool, you wouldn't have to clean it up 297 00:09:44,819 --> 00:09:45,818 right away? 298 00:09:45,856 --> 00:09:47,494 It would be wasteful, but... 299 00:09:47,519 --> 00:09:49,185 I wouldn't... 300 00:09:50,118 --> 00:09:52,505 And one, two... 301 00:09:52,530 --> 00:09:53,696 You are so gonna get it. 302 00:09:53,698 --> 00:09:54,697 - Three. - First of all, 303 00:09:54,699 --> 00:09:55,948 you left the refrigerator door open. 304 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:56,949 Here we go, four. 305 00:09:57,001 --> 00:09:58,834 That is a wild waste of energy. 306 00:09:58,869 --> 00:10:00,369 Six, seven... 307 00:10:02,988 --> 00:10:05,606 Bam! 308 00:10:05,631 --> 00:10:07,347 Not cleaning that up, baby. 309 00:10:07,461 --> 00:10:10,713 You are so dead. 310 00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:02,866 Oh, my God. 311 00:11:05,190 --> 00:11:06,323 When he seemed 312 00:11:06,348 --> 00:11:08,682 positively delighted 313 00:11:08,773 --> 00:11:10,366 at the thought of separate bedrooms. 314 00:11:10,391 --> 00:11:11,690 You said he had sleep problems. 315 00:11:11,715 --> 00:11:12,681 Mm-mm. 316 00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:14,540 He never had a problem with it before. 317 00:11:14,779 --> 00:11:16,245 What if he's that doubting the whole things? 318 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:18,497 No, did he demand separate bedrooms? 319 00:11:18,532 --> 00:11:19,615 Was he trying to start a fight? 320 00:11:19,617 --> 00:11:21,166 No, he said like it's nice to have 321 00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:22,202 the option or something. 322 00:11:22,253 --> 00:11:23,369 That's not cold feet, 323 00:11:23,421 --> 00:11:25,621 and I kind of get his point. 324 00:11:25,673 --> 00:11:26,673 What? 325 00:11:26,707 --> 00:11:28,424 Binge Netflix, fart with abandon, 326 00:11:28,459 --> 00:11:29,425 get your alone time. 327 00:11:29,450 --> 00:11:31,749 It really took me by surprise. 328 00:11:32,084 --> 00:11:33,918 No, I'm good. 329 00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:36,026 I have a photo shoot tomorrow. 330 00:11:36,183 --> 00:11:38,133 - You're kidding. - No. 331 00:11:38,185 --> 00:11:40,386 Oh, my... I could've sworn 332 00:11:40,438 --> 00:11:42,638 that you were letting Marria down gently. 333 00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:44,640 This is probably going to be the last chance 334 00:11:44,642 --> 00:11:45,974 I get to do this again. 335 00:11:46,027 --> 00:11:47,390 And you know after Marco, 336 00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:50,824 I'm kind of grateful to do something 337 00:11:50,849 --> 00:11:54,640 that might send some good energy into to the universe. 338 00:11:54,706 --> 00:11:58,515 Mm, here's to sending some good energy. 339 00:11:59,216 --> 00:12:00,765 Good energy. 340 00:12:10,026 --> 00:12:11,514 Mmm. 341 00:12:14,348 --> 00:12:15,348 Mm-hmm. 342 00:12:15,373 --> 00:12:17,218 Good morning Mrs. Clean. 343 00:12:17,957 --> 00:12:18,905 Mm-hmm. 344 00:12:18,930 --> 00:12:20,713 Good morning. 345 00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:22,907 Really, the sports already? 346 00:12:22,932 --> 00:12:25,817 Really with the scrubbing already? 347 00:12:29,019 --> 00:12:30,352 I really don't want to watch. 348 00:12:30,354 --> 00:12:31,353 Oh, come on. 349 00:12:31,355 --> 00:12:33,322 Come watch it with me. 350 00:12:33,357 --> 00:12:35,240 You've never given it the time of day. 351 00:12:35,276 --> 00:12:38,360 You know that Phil Jackson used to have his players 352 00:12:38,362 --> 00:12:39,361 practice without the ball. 353 00:12:39,363 --> 00:12:40,529 Oh, my God. 354 00:12:40,531 --> 00:12:41,997 No, no, cause it's about five people... 355 00:12:42,032 --> 00:12:44,249 - You sound like... - Thinking with one mind. 356 00:12:44,285 --> 00:12:46,618 A pretentious guy, who's about 357 00:12:46,670 --> 00:12:49,338 to direct a film with Joseph Gordon Levitt. 358 00:12:49,373 --> 00:12:50,373 Oh, wait! 359 00:12:50,424 --> 00:12:52,624 Oh, come on. 360 00:12:52,676 --> 00:12:54,676 I'm serious. 361 00:12:54,712 --> 00:12:56,762 It's... you danced in college. 362 00:12:56,797 --> 00:12:57,880 Yeah. It's... come here. 363 00:12:57,882 --> 00:12:58,881 I'll show you. 364 00:12:58,883 --> 00:13:00,215 No, I am hungover 365 00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:01,383 and I need food and water. 366 00:13:01,385 --> 00:13:02,768 Uh-huh, you need this. 367 00:13:02,803 --> 00:13:04,887 This is the ball, right? 368 00:13:04,889 --> 00:13:06,555 You can't let me get it, right? 369 00:13:06,557 --> 00:13:07,556 Cause here I can get it, 370 00:13:07,558 --> 00:13:09,191 but here I can't get it. 371 00:13:09,226 --> 00:13:10,309 You got to use your butt. 372 00:13:10,361 --> 00:13:12,144 - My butt? - Yeah you got to like dance. 373 00:13:12,196 --> 00:13:13,145 I will be away from... no. 374 00:13:13,197 --> 00:13:14,196 Keep it... let's see look, I get it. 375 00:13:14,231 --> 00:13:15,814 Oh, God! 376 00:13:15,839 --> 00:13:17,622 Ow! 377 00:13:17,647 --> 00:13:19,347 That didn't hurt. 378 00:13:20,404 --> 00:13:22,070 Now there's pretzels everywhere. 379 00:13:22,072 --> 00:13:24,490 I know that OCD carb nightmare! 380 00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:25,824 God, grow up! 381 00:13:25,876 --> 00:13:27,409 Oh, grow down! 382 00:13:28,913 --> 00:13:29,995 Grow down, Abby. 383 00:13:30,047 --> 00:13:31,046 I don't want to be tickled. 384 00:13:31,081 --> 00:13:32,047 Grow down, grow down, grow down. 385 00:13:32,082 --> 00:13:33,048 No really, stop. 386 00:13:33,083 --> 00:13:34,049 I don't want to be tickled. 387 00:13:34,084 --> 00:13:35,050 Stop! 388 00:13:35,085 --> 00:13:36,802 Oh, God! Jesus. 389 00:13:37,755 --> 00:13:38,755 You hit me in the face. 390 00:13:38,806 --> 00:13:39,838 I'm sorry. 391 00:13:39,890 --> 00:13:41,890 Can you just like relax for a minute. 392 00:13:41,926 --> 00:13:43,425 You're provoking me. 393 00:13:43,427 --> 00:13:44,426 I'm not provoking you. 394 00:13:44,428 --> 00:13:45,594 You clean the entire house 395 00:13:45,596 --> 00:13:47,429 when we talked about not cleaning the house. 396 00:13:50,468 --> 00:13:52,418 No, mm-mmm. 397 00:13:55,078 --> 00:13:56,027 No. 398 00:13:57,155 --> 00:13:59,162 No? And what is it Jake and Abby's 399 00:13:59,187 --> 00:14:00,943 greatest hits argument number seven? 400 00:14:00,945 --> 00:14:01,945 The cleaning argument? 401 00:14:01,996 --> 00:14:03,695 I don't want to have it, do you? 402 00:14:03,747 --> 00:14:05,030 Skip it, right? 403 00:14:05,082 --> 00:14:05,968 Let it go. 404 00:14:05,993 --> 00:14:08,160 I'm just... I'm gonna let it go. 405 00:14:11,026 --> 00:14:13,660 I think we're either gonna save our marriage 406 00:14:13,712 --> 00:14:16,262 or we're gonna end up in a mental institution together. 407 00:14:16,287 --> 00:14:17,920 Same difference. 408 00:14:23,234 --> 00:14:24,607 Good morning. 409 00:14:24,632 --> 00:14:25,581 - Hi. - Hi. 410 00:14:25,606 --> 00:14:26,638 Gordon texted. 411 00:14:26,781 --> 00:14:28,448 He's just running a bit late. 412 00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:29,449 No problem. 413 00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:30,616 It's probably brunch traffic. 414 00:14:30,618 --> 00:14:31,617 Is that a thing? 415 00:14:31,619 --> 00:14:32,618 I don't know. 416 00:14:32,620 --> 00:14:33,953 Anyways, no real time crunch here 417 00:14:33,955 --> 00:14:35,037 since we're only seeing the two houses. 418 00:14:35,090 --> 00:14:36,122 Oh, two. 419 00:14:36,124 --> 00:14:37,323 I thought that we were seeing four. 420 00:14:37,358 --> 00:14:39,008 Well, the ones on Roscomare and Samara 421 00:14:39,043 --> 00:14:40,126 have single master bedrooms 422 00:14:40,128 --> 00:14:41,711 and Mr. Beech's email said 423 00:14:41,763 --> 00:14:45,181 just the two master bedroom configurations from now on. 424 00:14:45,216 --> 00:14:48,634 Oh right, no, I thought the others... I didn't... they're singles. 425 00:14:48,636 --> 00:14:50,019 And here's Mr. Beech! 426 00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:51,521 I think I have the door code. 427 00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:53,106 Mm-hmm. 428 00:14:58,696 --> 00:15:00,947 You and Courtney have, uh, separate bedrooms? 429 00:15:00,982 --> 00:15:02,732 Uh, good morning to you too. 430 00:15:02,784 --> 00:15:04,400 We can take separate vacations. 431 00:15:04,452 --> 00:15:05,735 Come on. 432 00:15:05,787 --> 00:15:07,036 I just think the option is intriguing... 433 00:15:07,071 --> 00:15:09,372 The option to not sleep beside me. 434 00:15:09,397 --> 00:15:12,815 Okay, Chateau Du Beech et Banai awaits! 435 00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:15,161 Delia, love of my life, 436 00:15:15,213 --> 00:15:16,829 we are just exploring this thing. 437 00:15:16,881 --> 00:15:18,080 Exploring? 438 00:15:18,133 --> 00:15:19,882 You told Cyan. 439 00:15:19,918 --> 00:15:21,134 - Shawn. - Whatever his name is. 440 00:15:21,169 --> 00:15:22,835 The only one to see places with two masters, 441 00:15:22,887 --> 00:15:24,387 that's not exploring. 442 00:15:24,422 --> 00:15:25,588 That's deciding 443 00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:27,070 for both of us. 444 00:15:27,892 --> 00:15:29,976 Cyan, there better be two of everything. 445 00:15:30,011 --> 00:15:32,178 Two offices, two kitchens. 446 00:15:32,180 --> 00:15:33,327 So I take her through the whole thing, 447 00:15:33,352 --> 00:15:36,687 and afterwards Lilly thinks about it for a second, 448 00:15:37,036 --> 00:15:41,155 and then she says, "Mom, I'm pretty sure I'm not gonna 449 00:15:41,189 --> 00:15:43,573 "have sex until college, but when I do, 450 00:15:43,608 --> 00:15:45,992 "I promise I will call you as soon as it's over." 451 00:15:46,027 --> 00:15:46,993 Aww. 452 00:15:47,028 --> 00:15:47,994 Our little girl. 453 00:15:48,029 --> 00:15:48,995 I know. 454 00:15:49,030 --> 00:15:50,196 And Charlie... 455 00:15:50,198 --> 00:15:51,914 Oh, Charlie's gonna lose his virginity at 13. 456 00:15:52,712 --> 00:15:53,795 Or 30. 457 00:15:54,202 --> 00:15:55,868 I can kinda see it going either way for him. 458 00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:57,954 Agreed, I totally get that. 459 00:15:58,006 --> 00:16:00,423 Ah, so radical honesty... 460 00:16:00,458 --> 00:16:01,458 Go for it. 461 00:16:01,483 --> 00:16:04,184 When I think about the CW, baby. 462 00:16:05,597 --> 00:16:06,879 I just feel ripped off. 463 00:16:06,881 --> 00:16:09,348 I feel like we did the baby thing already. 464 00:16:09,384 --> 00:16:11,217 It was hard, I don't want to do it again. 465 00:16:11,269 --> 00:16:12,218 Yeah. 466 00:16:12,243 --> 00:16:13,993 Well radical honesty... 467 00:16:14,996 --> 00:16:16,898 You probably should've come on her tits. 468 00:16:18,309 --> 00:16:19,275 Right? 469 00:16:19,310 --> 00:16:20,560 Right. 470 00:16:20,612 --> 00:16:22,528 Like the CW baby is happening 471 00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:23,613 and we can bitch about it 472 00:16:23,648 --> 00:16:24,697 or we can embrace it. 473 00:16:24,732 --> 00:16:25,698 But if we're at our best, 474 00:16:25,733 --> 00:16:27,783 we can handle it. 475 00:16:27,819 --> 00:16:29,902 I mean, we can thrive even. 476 00:16:32,916 --> 00:16:34,115 Amazing. 477 00:16:34,140 --> 00:16:35,139 Thank you. 478 00:16:39,137 --> 00:16:42,105 Oh, my baby! 479 00:16:42,130 --> 00:16:44,130 I missed you! 480 00:16:44,155 --> 00:16:45,454 Oh, I missed you too, 481 00:16:45,479 --> 00:16:46,444 but I can't breathe. 482 00:16:46,469 --> 00:16:47,634 Mmm. 483 00:16:47,659 --> 00:16:50,890 The latest delectable creations from Scott. 484 00:16:51,188 --> 00:16:53,188 Game changers. 485 00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:55,430 Not vegan. 486 00:16:55,455 --> 00:16:56,955 Oh, exciting. 487 00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:58,012 - Mm-hmm. - Thank you. 488 00:16:58,037 --> 00:16:59,653 Okay now, dish it. 489 00:16:59,678 --> 00:17:01,095 How bad is it? 490 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,921 Honestly, I don't think I have the language skills. 491 00:17:03,946 --> 00:17:06,413 I don't think James Joyce had the language skills. 492 00:17:06,438 --> 00:17:07,737 Really? 493 00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:09,942 Mom, while I'm fully aware 494 00:17:09,944 --> 00:17:11,327 of the self-sabotaging nature 495 00:17:11,362 --> 00:17:12,662 of woman on woman ridicule. 496 00:17:12,697 --> 00:17:14,497 - Mm-hmm. - I must say this, 497 00:17:14,532 --> 00:17:16,532 she is a monster. 498 00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:19,085 I caught the monster part go on. 499 00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:20,786 She's dumb, she's mean, she's ignorant... 500 00:17:20,788 --> 00:17:21,921 Oh, whoa, whoa, mean how? 501 00:17:21,956 --> 00:17:22,922 Mean to you? 502 00:17:22,957 --> 00:17:23,957 Do I need to cut a bitch? 503 00:17:24,008 --> 00:17:26,259 The bitch was metaphorically cut. 504 00:17:26,284 --> 00:17:28,451 She even retreated to her parlor. 505 00:17:30,511 --> 00:17:32,261 I'm so proud of you. 506 00:17:32,410 --> 00:17:34,661 Please don't get into it with Dad on this, okay? 507 00:17:34,686 --> 00:17:36,552 Mm-mm, no. 508 00:17:36,604 --> 00:17:39,138 Oh, munchkin, come here. 509 00:17:39,217 --> 00:17:41,584 I'm gonna wash up and unpack. 510 00:17:41,609 --> 00:17:42,929 Come keep me company? 511 00:17:43,167 --> 00:17:45,034 Nothing would make me happier. 512 00:17:45,167 --> 00:17:46,950 I'll be right in. 513 00:17:51,728 --> 00:17:53,228 _ 514 00:17:53,710 --> 00:17:55,538 "Retreated to her parlor," huh. 515 00:17:55,573 --> 00:17:57,206 - Zooey's back. - _ 516 00:18:09,087 --> 00:18:11,202 _ 517 00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:18,678 Can I just say, 518 00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,730 I had your June of '98 "Vogue" cover 519 00:18:20,765 --> 00:18:23,149 in my locker all of 7th grade. 520 00:18:23,184 --> 00:18:25,935 Oh, my God, that's cool, thanks. 521 00:18:25,987 --> 00:18:28,104 Hey, can you help out a second? 522 00:18:28,156 --> 00:18:29,077 Yeah. 523 00:18:29,117 --> 00:18:30,195 Thanks, Phoebe. 524 00:18:31,075 --> 00:18:32,241 - Carson. - Mm-hmm? 525 00:18:32,276 --> 00:18:34,026 This girl, jowls, I'm not kidding. 526 00:18:34,028 --> 00:18:36,362 Can you tape them, try to put a jaw line on her, okay? 527 00:18:36,364 --> 00:18:37,413 - Okay. - Kind of in a hurry. 528 00:18:37,448 --> 00:18:38,497 Thanks. 529 00:18:40,182 --> 00:18:41,148 Tape them? 530 00:18:41,173 --> 00:18:42,866 What happened to all-natural? 531 00:18:44,122 --> 00:18:45,087 Jonas? 532 00:18:45,123 --> 00:18:46,088 Hey, I didn't know 533 00:18:46,124 --> 00:18:47,089 you we're gonna be here. 534 00:18:47,125 --> 00:18:48,791 - Phoebes, hey, honey. - Hi. 535 00:18:48,843 --> 00:18:50,376 Sorry, I couldn't sleep last night. 536 00:18:50,401 --> 00:18:52,735 You can work some magic, right? 537 00:18:54,215 --> 00:18:55,548 I'm so puffy. 538 00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:57,466 No, stop it you're fine. 539 00:18:57,869 --> 00:18:59,536 Just breathe. 540 00:18:59,561 --> 00:19:01,060 Okay. 541 00:19:01,272 --> 00:19:02,452 I'm great. 542 00:19:02,630 --> 00:19:04,513 I didn't even want to think what year it was. 543 00:19:04,538 --> 00:19:06,622 The last time the three of us were in the same room together. 544 00:19:06,647 --> 00:19:07,946 I'm sorry, out of time, come on. 545 00:19:08,062 --> 00:19:09,028 Almost done. 546 00:19:09,063 --> 00:19:10,896 Sorry, I'm good, I'm good. 547 00:19:10,948 --> 00:19:13,065 I could do it, I could do it. 548 00:19:14,402 --> 00:19:15,735 It's gonna be fine, Marria. 549 00:19:15,787 --> 00:19:17,486 You won't regret this, I promise. 550 00:19:17,538 --> 00:19:18,571 I'm gonna be fine. 551 00:19:18,596 --> 00:19:19,523 Yeah. 552 00:19:23,378 --> 00:19:25,411 What does that mean? 553 00:19:25,463 --> 00:19:26,912 "You won't regret this." 554 00:19:26,964 --> 00:19:29,882 Oh, Alicia and I, the producer, we're super tight. 555 00:19:29,917 --> 00:19:32,301 And she called me about this and we started talking about 556 00:19:32,336 --> 00:19:33,469 what other girls might be good, 557 00:19:33,504 --> 00:19:36,088 and I totally pushed for you two. 558 00:19:36,113 --> 00:19:37,335 You didn't tell me that. 559 00:19:37,417 --> 00:19:39,641 - Well you're glad you're here, right? - Yeah. 560 00:19:41,095 --> 00:19:42,171 How is Jonas? 561 00:19:43,406 --> 00:19:44,939 Alcoholic. 562 00:19:45,335 --> 00:19:47,433 She's been sober for a few months. 563 00:19:47,435 --> 00:19:49,602 Just trying to throw her a bone. 564 00:19:49,654 --> 00:19:51,937 You should have seen her before I worked on her. 565 00:19:55,046 --> 00:19:58,097 I did see on the Twitter that you're fake date 566 00:19:58,122 --> 00:20:00,138 with the real doctor was a disaster. 567 00:20:00,163 --> 00:20:01,445 Well, I did cry 568 00:20:01,582 --> 00:20:02,865 over you. 569 00:20:02,917 --> 00:20:04,033 If you must know. 570 00:20:04,085 --> 00:20:05,618 Sad, but what an awesome story. 571 00:20:05,670 --> 00:20:06,619 Go on. 572 00:20:07,509 --> 00:20:08,891 How much longer do you have to 573 00:20:09,090 --> 00:20:10,289 do that kind of stuff. 574 00:20:10,291 --> 00:20:11,957 It's kind of bad for my ego cookies. 575 00:20:11,959 --> 00:20:13,843 I don't know. 576 00:20:13,878 --> 00:20:15,878 I do know it's hard. 577 00:20:15,930 --> 00:20:17,038 Thank you. 578 00:20:17,904 --> 00:20:19,036 But I mean... 579 00:20:20,468 --> 00:20:22,101 Soon you have to abdicate your role 580 00:20:22,136 --> 00:20:24,553 as the face of the divorce industrial complex, right? 581 00:20:24,605 --> 00:20:25,554 Not necessarily. 582 00:20:25,606 --> 00:20:26,555 I am writing a book. 583 00:20:26,607 --> 00:20:27,607 Oh, I know. 584 00:20:27,642 --> 00:20:29,141 My parents read the press release. 585 00:20:29,193 --> 00:20:30,476 "I mean, your marriage failed. 586 00:20:30,478 --> 00:20:31,913 Do you have to announce it to the world?" 587 00:20:32,697 --> 00:20:34,577 Ugh, that's a good alternate title for the book. 588 00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:38,984 I'm sure your parents are glad 589 00:20:39,009 --> 00:20:41,877 that you finally ditched the dead beat husband, right? 590 00:20:43,202 --> 00:20:44,374 I'm sorry. 591 00:20:44,408 --> 00:20:45,458 Jesus. 592 00:20:45,493 --> 00:20:47,243 They never gave you a real chance. 593 00:20:47,295 --> 00:20:50,162 And the truth is they have barely mentioned 594 00:20:50,164 --> 00:20:51,831 our split at all. 595 00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:52,998 Oh yeah, it's not about them. 596 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:54,166 Why would they? 597 00:20:54,168 --> 00:20:55,584 Don't be mean. 598 00:20:55,636 --> 00:20:57,169 I'm not being mean, I'm being realistic. 599 00:20:57,221 --> 00:20:59,505 I mean, you and Max are their props. 600 00:20:59,507 --> 00:21:02,641 They want the image of the perfectly happy family 601 00:21:02,677 --> 00:21:05,511 until something gets messy then... whoosh! 602 00:21:05,513 --> 00:21:07,513 They're ghosts! They're gone! 603 00:21:07,565 --> 00:21:08,647 That is not true. 604 00:21:08,683 --> 00:21:10,015 They raised us to be independent... 605 00:21:10,017 --> 00:21:11,851 Come on, they raised you to raise yourself. 606 00:21:11,853 --> 00:21:13,853 I mean, my mom may call three times a day, 607 00:21:13,905 --> 00:21:15,604 - Yeah, that does not mean... - But she would anything for me. 608 00:21:15,656 --> 00:21:17,022 - That she... - That means she's a parent! 609 00:21:17,074 --> 00:21:18,107 No! 610 00:21:18,159 --> 00:21:19,108 No. 611 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:20,493 This is Jake and Abby, 612 00:21:20,528 --> 00:21:22,528 greatest hits number 19. 613 00:21:22,580 --> 00:21:24,413 You are 19 with a bullet in rising. 614 00:21:24,448 --> 00:21:25,414 Could we just? 615 00:21:25,449 --> 00:21:26,532 - Move on. - Please. 616 00:21:26,534 --> 00:21:27,750 - Moving on! - That number 19 is gone. 617 00:21:27,785 --> 00:21:29,034 I'm throwing it out. 618 00:21:29,086 --> 00:21:30,369 I don't even know what you're talking about. 619 00:21:30,421 --> 00:21:31,787 What are you talking about? 620 00:21:36,624 --> 00:21:38,006 Yeah. 621 00:21:40,464 --> 00:21:41,714 Ah! 622 00:21:41,766 --> 00:21:43,682 Okay. 623 00:21:44,968 --> 00:21:46,218 I feel tense, do you feel tense? 624 00:21:46,220 --> 00:21:47,553 - Yeah, I feel a little tense. - Yeah. 625 00:21:47,555 --> 00:21:49,305 But I still feel like we're doing the right thing. 626 00:21:49,357 --> 00:21:50,806 You know, we're not going down old roads. 627 00:21:50,858 --> 00:21:52,024 - No, no, yeah, definitely. - Dead-ends. 628 00:21:52,059 --> 00:21:53,025 - Definitely. - Right? 629 00:21:53,060 --> 00:21:54,777 - Less talk more action. - Yes! 630 00:21:54,812 --> 00:21:58,113 - We should... - We could... make hot cocoa. 631 00:21:58,149 --> 00:21:59,865 Play a game of Hearts. 632 00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:01,483 Not exactly action... 633 00:22:02,570 --> 00:22:03,536 If you want to go the mellow route, 634 00:22:03,571 --> 00:22:04,537 we could like 635 00:22:04,572 --> 00:22:05,621 binge watch "House of Cards." 636 00:22:05,656 --> 00:22:06,956 I've plowed through it already. 637 00:22:06,991 --> 00:22:07,957 - Okay. - Sorry. 638 00:22:07,992 --> 00:22:08,958 We were separated. 639 00:22:08,993 --> 00:22:09,959 It's... yeah. 640 00:22:09,994 --> 00:22:11,043 I mean, 641 00:22:11,078 --> 00:22:12,244 we could just take a bunch of ecstasy, 642 00:22:12,296 --> 00:22:14,213 find the old dance mixes and party all night. 643 00:22:14,248 --> 00:22:15,831 Oh, do you have molly? 644 00:22:15,883 --> 00:22:18,584 Molly... isn't that the New Coke of ecstasy? 645 00:22:18,636 --> 00:22:20,135 Do you have it? 646 00:22:20,171 --> 00:22:21,337 No, I don't have any. 647 00:22:21,362 --> 00:22:23,896 Aww, sounds amazing. 648 00:22:25,092 --> 00:22:26,141 You know there is this guy 649 00:22:26,177 --> 00:22:28,761 at the the Paradiso who says anytime I want, 650 00:22:28,813 --> 00:22:30,563 I could be back in like 40 minutes. 651 00:22:30,598 --> 00:22:31,538 Hurry up. 652 00:22:33,517 --> 00:22:34,934 Kiss me first. 653 00:22:34,986 --> 00:22:36,936 Oh, my God. 654 00:22:36,988 --> 00:22:37,988 All right, um, 655 00:22:38,022 --> 00:22:39,271 I'll text you when I get it. 656 00:22:39,273 --> 00:22:41,023 Okay, I'll find Charlie's glow sticks. 657 00:22:41,075 --> 00:22:42,608 Whoo! 658 00:22:42,610 --> 00:22:45,778 Zing, zing, zing, zing, zing, zing. 659 00:22:57,484 --> 00:22:58,883 Novak, what? 660 00:22:58,919 --> 00:22:59,867 I need a quick favor. 661 00:23:00,039 --> 00:23:01,004 Is this a home invasion? 662 00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:02,005 Uh, no. 663 00:23:02,041 --> 00:23:03,006 Fine, if you could show me 664 00:23:03,042 --> 00:23:04,124 how to forward a text message. 665 00:23:04,126 --> 00:23:05,209 Okay, I'm looking for that guy. 666 00:23:05,261 --> 00:23:06,627 I think he lives in 3F... 667 00:23:06,629 --> 00:23:07,629 Stanny? 668 00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:08,629 Oh... it's pronounced "Staani". 669 00:23:08,681 --> 00:23:09,630 Stanni. 670 00:23:09,682 --> 00:23:10,631 - Like Yanni. - Uh-huh. 671 00:23:10,683 --> 00:23:11,765 He's in jail. 672 00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:13,016 - Oh, shit. - Yeah. 673 00:23:13,052 --> 00:23:14,017 Bummer. 674 00:23:14,053 --> 00:23:15,886 Forward texting, how? 675 00:23:15,938 --> 00:23:17,468 You just... 676 00:23:18,891 --> 00:23:20,307 Press it then you press contact. 677 00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:21,308 - Uh-huh. - See? 678 00:23:21,360 --> 00:23:22,309 Is this Zooey's phone? 679 00:23:22,361 --> 00:23:23,310 Yeah. 680 00:23:23,362 --> 00:23:24,645 She tells me she hate Charlene, right? 681 00:23:24,647 --> 00:23:25,646 I check the phone, 682 00:23:25,648 --> 00:23:26,814 and they've been texting each other 683 00:23:26,866 --> 00:23:29,650 back and forth with, "I miss you," "I miss you too," 684 00:23:29,652 --> 00:23:31,118 "I can't wait to come back." 685 00:23:32,705 --> 00:23:34,371 It's horrible, right? 686 00:23:34,406 --> 00:23:36,857 Okay, you are, one, spying on your daughter. 687 00:23:36,892 --> 00:23:38,208 And two, you're pissed 688 00:23:38,244 --> 00:23:39,209 that she's not miserable 689 00:23:39,245 --> 00:23:40,210 when she's with her father. 690 00:23:40,246 --> 00:23:41,462 She's lying to me. 691 00:23:41,497 --> 00:23:43,163 Well gosh, I wonder how you would've reacted 692 00:23:43,215 --> 00:23:44,381 had she told you the truth. 693 00:23:44,406 --> 00:23:46,156 That would have gone great for her. 694 00:23:48,446 --> 00:23:50,023 Why are you in my apartment again? 695 00:23:52,712 --> 00:23:55,079 Do you have any ecstasy, extra molly? 696 00:23:57,596 --> 00:23:59,179 Oh, my God. 697 00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:00,848 You two are hilarious. 698 00:24:00,900 --> 00:24:01,849 What do you mean "you two?" 699 00:24:01,901 --> 00:24:02,850 What does that mean? 700 00:24:02,902 --> 00:24:05,819 Oh, I know all about it, lover boy! 701 00:24:05,844 --> 00:24:07,009 You don't know anything. 702 00:24:07,072 --> 00:24:08,522 Let's see here. 703 00:24:08,937 --> 00:24:11,024 No ecstasy because I'm not 15. 704 00:24:11,026 --> 00:24:12,025 Okay. 705 00:24:12,050 --> 00:24:13,967 Now we've got... oh. 706 00:24:14,864 --> 00:24:17,831 Two Ambien, couple Zoloft, 707 00:24:17,867 --> 00:24:20,534 a Lipitor, and, um... 708 00:24:20,968 --> 00:24:23,420 Oh, what do you know. 709 00:24:23,455 --> 00:24:26,173 A Viagra-Frumpkis I found in my shoe. 710 00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:27,708 I'll take it all. 711 00:24:27,710 --> 00:24:28,959 Except the Viagra, thank you. 712 00:24:29,011 --> 00:24:30,544 Mm-hmm. 713 00:24:33,549 --> 00:24:34,882 Fine, just give it to me. 714 00:24:34,884 --> 00:24:36,049 Don't give me the look. 715 00:24:36,101 --> 00:24:38,051 Can I have a baggy or something please? 716 00:24:38,053 --> 00:24:41,388 So how's my... highly-wound friend doing? 717 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,441 She's, um... good you know, 718 00:24:44,476 --> 00:24:45,893 we'll see, we're working on it. 719 00:24:45,945 --> 00:24:47,394 She misses you. 720 00:24:47,396 --> 00:24:50,452 I miss her too a lot. 721 00:24:51,199 --> 00:24:52,198 And if you tell her I told you that 722 00:24:52,223 --> 00:24:53,922 I will kill you. 723 00:24:54,069 --> 00:24:55,118 Get out. 724 00:24:55,143 --> 00:24:57,109 Gladly. 725 00:25:10,070 --> 00:25:12,968 _ 726 00:25:21,821 --> 00:25:22,820 Hi. 727 00:25:22,845 --> 00:25:23,845 Hey. 728 00:25:23,983 --> 00:25:25,432 Pig tails? 729 00:25:25,434 --> 00:25:26,733 Interesting. 730 00:25:26,769 --> 00:25:27,985 Where are you? 731 00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:29,653 I'm just heading out to Soho House, 732 00:25:29,688 --> 00:25:30,988 Terry Gilliam's having a screening, 733 00:25:31,023 --> 00:25:31,989 "The Fisher King." 734 00:25:32,024 --> 00:25:33,273 You want to come? 735 00:25:33,275 --> 00:25:35,179 Um, last minute. 736 00:25:35,578 --> 00:25:36,777 I know I'm sorry, 737 00:25:36,779 --> 00:25:38,445 but I just found out I got a plus one. 738 00:25:38,447 --> 00:25:39,446 Is it too late? 739 00:25:39,448 --> 00:25:40,864 It is, 740 00:25:40,916 --> 00:25:42,616 but that sounds like fun. 741 00:25:42,618 --> 00:25:44,117 Look, one more question. 742 00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:45,335 Anything. 743 00:25:45,371 --> 00:25:47,421 Although it's impolitic to ask 744 00:25:47,456 --> 00:25:49,122 about your marital situation. 745 00:25:49,174 --> 00:25:50,265 What? 746 00:25:50,509 --> 00:25:52,426 If you want to do a follow-up piece, 747 00:25:52,461 --> 00:25:54,343 don't you need a follow-up date? 748 00:25:55,214 --> 00:25:56,679 Let me say this. 749 00:25:57,132 --> 00:25:59,800 I would like to follow-up. 750 00:25:59,802 --> 00:26:03,053 Good to hear. 751 00:26:04,139 --> 00:26:05,188 Until then. 752 00:26:05,278 --> 00:26:07,028 Okay, bye. 753 00:26:18,462 --> 00:26:19,428 Gorgeous. 754 00:26:20,013 --> 00:26:21,249 Perfect 755 00:26:28,747 --> 00:26:30,964 It's good to be home, isn't it? 756 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:32,299 Yeah. 757 00:26:34,470 --> 00:26:36,054 Phoebe, over here. 758 00:26:37,006 --> 00:26:40,590 Okay. Yeah. 759 00:26:45,399 --> 00:26:46,632 Abby. 760 00:26:47,412 --> 00:26:48,778 Abs? 761 00:26:48,851 --> 00:26:50,350 Abby, where are you? 762 00:26:50,402 --> 00:26:52,085 Got some really lame drugs! 763 00:27:00,370 --> 00:27:03,070 - Good morning, you. - Good morning. 764 00:27:04,533 --> 00:27:05,952 I feel asleep. 765 00:27:07,086 --> 00:27:08,535 No, you must have blacked out 766 00:27:08,587 --> 00:27:10,037 cause we... we rolled all night. 767 00:27:10,039 --> 00:27:11,121 We danced like maniacs. 768 00:27:11,173 --> 00:27:12,539 So you're going to be really tired. 769 00:27:12,591 --> 00:27:14,041 What's happening here? 770 00:27:14,093 --> 00:27:15,759 This dryer vent's been busted, 771 00:27:15,794 --> 00:27:17,711 and I'm just feeling handy, and I miss being 772 00:27:17,713 --> 00:27:18,879 the man around the house. 773 00:27:18,931 --> 00:27:20,547 You missed attacking 774 00:27:20,549 --> 00:27:22,766 various inanimate objects and screaming? 775 00:27:22,801 --> 00:27:25,385 Maybe let's try the... new version of that. 776 00:27:25,387 --> 00:27:27,104 Where I'm calm and capable 777 00:27:27,139 --> 00:27:28,472 and you're supportive. 778 00:27:28,497 --> 00:27:29,366 Sorry. 779 00:27:30,225 --> 00:27:31,391 You're cute. 780 00:27:31,443 --> 00:27:32,943 You are capable. 781 00:27:32,978 --> 00:27:35,195 And this is... this looks beautiful. 782 00:27:35,230 --> 00:27:36,196 Thank you so much. 783 00:27:36,231 --> 00:27:37,397 You're welcome. 784 00:27:37,449 --> 00:27:38,732 You mad about my party fail? 785 00:27:38,784 --> 00:27:40,951 No, I'm exhausted anyway. 786 00:27:41,987 --> 00:27:42,953 Actually, couldn't even find 787 00:27:42,988 --> 00:27:43,954 that guy at the Paradiso, 788 00:27:43,989 --> 00:27:45,288 so I had to score stuff from Jo. 789 00:27:45,324 --> 00:27:47,040 - Hilarious. - I know. 790 00:27:47,076 --> 00:27:48,458 What drugs did Jo have? 791 00:27:48,494 --> 00:27:50,460 Ambien, Zoloft, and Viagra. 792 00:27:51,830 --> 00:27:53,747 So, we would have been sleepy, 793 00:27:53,772 --> 00:27:56,106 not depressed, and erect. 794 00:27:56,131 --> 00:27:57,430 Yeah, could've been a crazy night. 795 00:27:57,937 --> 00:27:59,653 It was a super cozy sleep though. 796 00:27:59,688 --> 00:28:01,671 - It was cozy. - Hmm. 797 00:28:02,966 --> 00:28:04,382 How's Jo? 798 00:28:05,748 --> 00:28:07,414 Jo's batshit crazy. 799 00:28:07,513 --> 00:28:08,979 Whatever is going on between the two of you, 800 00:28:09,014 --> 00:28:10,534 she seems like she wants to make peace. 801 00:28:10,566 --> 00:28:11,515 She misses you. 802 00:28:11,567 --> 00:28:13,900 Oh, peace sounds... 803 00:28:13,936 --> 00:28:15,102 complicated. 804 00:28:15,154 --> 00:28:16,937 I'm good. 805 00:28:25,614 --> 00:28:28,081 They want this every night. 806 00:28:30,753 --> 00:28:32,786 Mr. Beech, Ms. Banai? 807 00:28:32,788 --> 00:28:34,121 Everything okay in there? 808 00:28:34,173 --> 00:28:35,539 Yes, you guess! 809 00:28:35,591 --> 00:28:37,457 In your shared bedroom. 810 00:28:47,318 --> 00:28:48,530 Hello? 811 00:28:49,075 --> 00:28:50,407 We'll take it! 812 00:28:50,432 --> 00:28:51,562 Wonderful! 813 00:28:52,691 --> 00:28:53,857 I'm here. 814 00:28:53,892 --> 00:28:55,642 Whenever. 815 00:29:02,034 --> 00:29:03,150 Fine. 816 00:29:03,152 --> 00:29:04,651 We go with the one bedroom. 817 00:29:04,703 --> 00:29:07,154 As long as you keep taking advantage of me. 818 00:29:07,179 --> 00:29:10,796 Oh, that makes me feel so good. 819 00:29:11,043 --> 00:29:13,405 You know, whenever 820 00:29:14,051 --> 00:29:15,718 I imagined being married, 821 00:29:15,743 --> 00:29:17,543 which was almost never, 822 00:29:17,666 --> 00:29:21,551 I did think about separate bedrooms, 823 00:29:21,587 --> 00:29:24,588 I mean, possibly as an idea but... 824 00:29:25,663 --> 00:29:27,132 When you brought it up, 825 00:29:28,015 --> 00:29:30,499 I decided, no way. 826 00:29:31,230 --> 00:29:33,346 I want my man close. 827 00:29:33,348 --> 00:29:35,460 It's funny how these things work, right? 828 00:29:40,739 --> 00:29:42,022 Wait a minute Gordon Beech, 829 00:29:42,074 --> 00:29:43,190 did you play me? 830 00:29:43,192 --> 00:29:44,991 You do have a certain consistencies 831 00:29:45,027 --> 00:29:45,992 of character. 832 00:29:46,028 --> 00:29:47,444 You played me! 833 00:29:47,496 --> 00:29:49,613 You mean you wanted one bedroom the whole time? 834 00:29:49,665 --> 00:29:52,365 Well hey, relationships are negotiation. 835 00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:54,773 Yes, and you are just so... good. 836 00:29:55,370 --> 00:29:56,703 I know, I know. 837 00:29:56,705 --> 00:29:57,704 Yes. 838 00:29:57,706 --> 00:29:59,539 God damn it, I love you. 839 00:30:02,628 --> 00:30:03,593 And done. 840 00:30:03,629 --> 00:30:04,594 Yeah? 841 00:30:04,630 --> 00:30:05,595 Impressed? 842 00:30:05,631 --> 00:30:07,180 I am, thank you. 843 00:30:07,216 --> 00:30:08,351 You're welcome. 844 00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:11,101 What's that? 845 00:30:12,354 --> 00:30:15,138 Oh yeah, what is that? 846 00:30:15,190 --> 00:30:17,546 Oh, I don't know. 847 00:30:18,143 --> 00:30:19,359 Run inside and turn the dryer on 848 00:30:19,394 --> 00:30:20,265 maybe it's not important. 849 00:30:20,290 --> 00:30:21,374 It looks important. 850 00:30:21,813 --> 00:30:22,779 Well, how do you know? 851 00:30:22,814 --> 00:30:23,780 I'm the one who fixed it. 852 00:30:23,815 --> 00:30:25,866 Except it's not fixed. 853 00:30:25,901 --> 00:30:27,117 I'm just gonna... 854 00:30:27,152 --> 00:30:28,618 - Just give me a minute. - I'm gonna YouTube it. 855 00:30:28,654 --> 00:30:29,870 - Are you kidding? - Open my laptop. 856 00:30:29,905 --> 00:30:31,571 I'm not being overbearing. 857 00:30:31,623 --> 00:30:33,206 If you need help and I'm helping. 858 00:30:33,242 --> 00:30:34,242 It's just help. 859 00:30:34,293 --> 00:30:35,242 Well, that was quite a sentence. 860 00:30:35,294 --> 00:30:36,376 You're a writer, right? 861 00:30:36,411 --> 00:30:38,662 And you're a dryer repairman, right? 862 00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:42,379 Okay, taking a breath. 863 00:30:42,404 --> 00:30:43,486 Breathing. 864 00:30:43,511 --> 00:30:44,510 Breathing. 865 00:30:44,535 --> 00:30:46,327 Argh. 866 00:30:47,055 --> 00:30:48,004 Same team. 867 00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,056 Same team. 868 00:30:49,091 --> 00:30:50,056 - Yes. - Okay. 869 00:30:50,092 --> 00:30:51,424 I think it will be a great idea 870 00:30:51,426 --> 00:30:52,592 if you went inside 871 00:30:52,644 --> 00:30:54,261 and use the Google machine 872 00:30:54,263 --> 00:30:55,312 and help me fix this. 873 00:30:55,347 --> 00:30:56,132 I shall. 874 00:30:56,157 --> 00:30:57,157 Thank you. 875 00:30:58,350 --> 00:31:00,100 Um, try... 876 00:31:00,102 --> 00:31:01,935 Strickland dryer vent weird piece 877 00:31:01,987 --> 00:31:03,320 or extra piece. 878 00:31:03,355 --> 00:31:05,021 - One sec. - Okay. 879 00:31:09,444 --> 00:31:10,443 Shit! 880 00:31:10,445 --> 00:31:11,734 Hey, I just said one sec! 881 00:31:12,497 --> 00:31:14,497 Just look it up, please. 882 00:31:17,336 --> 00:31:19,869 No, don't Google it, Google... are you... 883 00:31:19,922 --> 00:31:21,755 You checking emails right now? 884 00:31:21,790 --> 00:31:23,707 I saw something from Barbara 885 00:31:23,759 --> 00:31:24,708 about an assignment 886 00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:25,709 and I was ignoring it 887 00:31:25,761 --> 00:31:26,760 so that we can have our weekend. 888 00:31:26,795 --> 00:31:27,794 Is trying to save your marriage 889 00:31:27,846 --> 00:31:29,452 getting the way of your divorce job? 890 00:31:30,098 --> 00:31:31,047 Wow. 891 00:31:31,099 --> 00:31:32,882 Yeah, here. 892 00:31:32,935 --> 00:31:34,601 Google it, please? 893 00:31:34,636 --> 00:31:36,019 No look, use Google Images... 894 00:31:36,054 --> 00:31:37,304 - Oh, my God! - You're looking for an image. 895 00:31:37,306 --> 00:31:39,139 Would you please stop micromanaging me? 896 00:31:39,141 --> 00:31:40,523 - I haven't even started. - Really? 897 00:31:40,559 --> 00:31:41,524 You're any further up my ass... 898 00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:42,943 - I could see out my mouth. - Out of my mouth. 899 00:31:42,978 --> 00:31:44,894 Yeah, yes, you know how I knew you were going to say that? 900 00:31:44,947 --> 00:31:47,814 Because you have said it an incalculable number of times! 901 00:31:47,816 --> 00:31:49,149 Fix it yourself. 902 00:31:50,452 --> 00:31:51,651 What is your problem? 903 00:31:51,653 --> 00:31:53,320 You are so stubborn! 904 00:31:53,372 --> 00:31:55,488 Yeah, I'm stubborn if I ever deigned to suggested that 905 00:31:55,490 --> 00:31:56,873 you're the one who maybe did something wrong! 906 00:31:56,908 --> 00:31:58,124 I have no idea what you're talking about. 907 00:31:58,160 --> 00:31:59,125 I think you're going crazy. 908 00:31:59,161 --> 00:32:00,161 You know what? 909 00:32:00,212 --> 00:32:02,329 Radical honesty, you're making me crazy! 910 00:32:02,331 --> 00:32:03,747 You can't handle honesty, Jake. 911 00:32:03,799 --> 00:32:04,831 Of any kind! 912 00:32:04,833 --> 00:32:05,832 Radical or otherwise. 913 00:32:05,834 --> 00:32:07,155 I can handle it! 914 00:32:07,180 --> 00:32:08,180 Can you? 915 00:32:08,205 --> 00:32:09,882 Bring it on. 916 00:32:11,288 --> 00:32:12,842 They were work emails, 917 00:32:12,867 --> 00:32:13,999 or they were Harris emails. 918 00:32:14,035 --> 00:32:15,284 Would you even know the difference anymore? 919 00:32:15,319 --> 00:32:16,285 Why does it even matter? 920 00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:17,286 Why does it matter 921 00:32:17,321 --> 00:32:18,287 if you're lying to me? 922 00:32:18,322 --> 00:32:19,405 Like you lied about having a baby... 923 00:32:19,457 --> 00:32:20,739 No, no, don't change the subject. 924 00:32:20,741 --> 00:32:22,195 Answer the question. 925 00:32:23,297 --> 00:32:24,630 Fine, yes. 926 00:32:24,632 --> 00:32:26,632 I corresponded with Harris... 927 00:32:26,684 --> 00:32:29,718 - Corresponded! - But only because all weekend, 928 00:32:29,770 --> 00:32:31,019 you've been picking on me... 929 00:32:31,055 --> 00:32:32,304 - All right. - And making me feel like shit. 930 00:32:32,306 --> 00:32:33,555 This is my fault. 931 00:32:33,607 --> 00:32:35,307 First of all, I've not been picking on you, 932 00:32:35,309 --> 00:32:36,869 I've been trying to have a sense of fun, 933 00:32:36,894 --> 00:32:38,393 which I understand is not exactly in your wheelhouse. 934 00:32:38,445 --> 00:32:39,394 This is what I'm talking about. 935 00:32:39,446 --> 00:32:40,395 You know what? 936 00:32:40,447 --> 00:32:41,530 If I do anything 937 00:32:41,565 --> 00:32:42,731 that's remotely corrected 938 00:32:42,783 --> 00:32:44,066 or remotely suggested, 939 00:32:44,118 --> 00:32:46,118 maybe you should just try to relax. 940 00:32:46,153 --> 00:32:47,819 You go to Defcon One. 941 00:32:47,821 --> 00:32:49,705 That's regular Defcon. 942 00:32:49,740 --> 00:32:51,290 No it... that's highest Defcon. 943 00:32:51,325 --> 00:32:53,625 - No, it is not. - Stop it, stop it! 944 00:32:53,661 --> 00:32:54,876 Our problem is, 945 00:32:54,912 --> 00:32:56,962 and always will be, 946 00:32:56,997 --> 00:32:59,131 what you said before you believed. 947 00:32:59,554 --> 00:33:00,916 It's my fault. 948 00:33:01,077 --> 00:33:02,389 Everything. 949 00:33:02,552 --> 00:33:03,796 All the time. 950 00:33:05,851 --> 00:33:06,888 Not true. 951 00:33:06,924 --> 00:33:07,655 True. 952 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,063 I'm just a monkey. 953 00:33:09,343 --> 00:33:11,009 I just fling my poo 954 00:33:11,011 --> 00:33:12,227 and make bad decisions 955 00:33:12,263 --> 00:33:13,263 and make messes 956 00:33:13,314 --> 00:33:14,680 and you're the put upon adult 957 00:33:14,732 --> 00:33:16,848 who has to come in and save the day. 958 00:33:16,900 --> 00:33:18,767 And poor you, because your stuck 959 00:33:18,819 --> 00:33:20,185 with your monkey husband, 960 00:33:20,187 --> 00:33:23,710 you have to go find solace in other men! 961 00:33:24,085 --> 00:33:26,441 Harris replaced Will! 962 00:33:26,493 --> 00:33:28,179 Replaced Nate! 963 00:33:28,984 --> 00:33:31,363 Who replaced your monkey husband! 964 00:33:36,086 --> 00:33:39,037 Because you make me feel like shit. 965 00:33:39,039 --> 00:33:40,789 - Oh, my God. - Come on, Jake. 966 00:33:40,841 --> 00:33:42,046 Face it. 967 00:33:43,127 --> 00:33:44,843 Who I am, 968 00:33:44,878 --> 00:33:47,846 my neatness, my control, 969 00:33:47,881 --> 00:33:49,131 my ambition. 970 00:33:49,183 --> 00:33:50,716 You don't like me. 971 00:33:50,718 --> 00:33:53,302 - Don't put it back on me. - No, you don't. 972 00:33:53,354 --> 00:33:54,936 You resent that I provide for this family. 973 00:33:54,972 --> 00:33:56,054 - Oh, here we go. - The more important thing... 974 00:33:56,106 --> 00:33:58,056 - Money time! - You have no respect 975 00:33:58,058 --> 00:33:59,057 for my career... 976 00:33:59,059 --> 00:34:00,275 - How did you figure that? - Maybe if I... 977 00:34:00,311 --> 00:34:02,728 gave a crap about stuff nobody cares about. 978 00:34:02,730 --> 00:34:04,196 Joseph Gordon-Levitt cares about it. 979 00:34:04,231 --> 00:34:06,231 And you just can't get over the fact 980 00:34:06,233 --> 00:34:07,699 that I'm getting a movie made. 981 00:34:07,735 --> 00:34:09,618 Your loser monkey husband is getting something done. 982 00:34:09,653 --> 00:34:10,619 You know what? 983 00:34:10,654 --> 00:34:11,703 I have been nothing but supportive, 984 00:34:11,739 --> 00:34:12,704 even you have admitted that. 985 00:34:12,740 --> 00:34:13,905 I got retroactive diamonds... 986 00:34:13,907 --> 00:34:14,990 - When, when? - because of how supportive... 987 00:34:15,042 --> 00:34:16,408 Yeah, well that was love goggles, 988 00:34:16,410 --> 00:34:17,793 because you are not supportive 989 00:34:17,828 --> 00:34:20,078 and you remind me on a daily basis 990 00:34:20,130 --> 00:34:22,497 how much more functional and reasonable you are than me. 991 00:34:22,549 --> 00:34:23,498 Because I am. 992 00:34:23,550 --> 00:34:25,917 No reasonable, functional adult 993 00:34:25,919 --> 00:34:28,303 would have knocked up his 26-year-old... 994 00:34:28,339 --> 00:34:29,304 - Oh, my God! - actress rebound. 995 00:34:29,340 --> 00:34:30,639 I pulled out. 996 00:34:30,674 --> 00:34:32,891 - Oh, my God! - It was an accident. 997 00:34:32,926 --> 00:34:33,925 You pulled out? 998 00:34:33,927 --> 00:34:34,926 Yes! 999 00:34:34,928 --> 00:34:36,311 Spoken like a true monkey! 1000 00:34:36,347 --> 00:34:38,063 Do you have any idea what you've done to our lives? 1001 00:34:38,098 --> 00:34:39,765 Spare me your self-righteous bullshit! 1002 00:34:39,767 --> 00:34:42,601 Monkey, monkey! 1003 00:34:42,603 --> 00:34:43,603 Stop that. 1004 00:34:43,654 --> 00:34:45,103 Monkey, monkey, monkey... 1005 00:34:45,105 --> 00:34:46,571 Shut this stupid mouth! 1006 00:34:46,607 --> 00:34:47,607 Shut up! 1007 00:34:55,165 --> 00:34:56,281 Hello? 1008 00:34:56,333 --> 00:34:58,166 Hey, Ford, how are the kids? 1009 00:34:58,202 --> 00:34:59,751 They're fine, okay. 1010 00:34:59,787 --> 00:35:01,420 No, um... 1011 00:35:01,455 --> 00:35:04,256 I'm sorry, I just ran in from outside. 1012 00:35:04,291 --> 00:35:06,875 Um, okay great, I'll see you in a little while. 1013 00:35:06,927 --> 00:35:08,460 Uh, Charlie couldn't sleep. 1014 00:35:08,512 --> 00:35:10,545 He's terribly homesick, 1015 00:35:10,597 --> 00:35:13,465 so Ford is bringing them back early and, ah... 1016 00:35:14,405 --> 00:35:16,238 He will be here soon. 1017 00:35:21,108 --> 00:35:23,308 I'll help you clean up this mess. 1018 00:35:47,769 --> 00:35:49,519 Hey, you. 1019 00:35:49,720 --> 00:35:50,969 Daddy! 1020 00:35:51,004 --> 00:35:51,970 Daddy just came over 1021 00:35:52,005 --> 00:35:53,054 to fix the dryer vent. 1022 00:35:53,090 --> 00:35:54,389 Yeah, I almost did it too. 1023 00:35:54,425 --> 00:35:55,507 Sweetheart. 1024 00:35:55,559 --> 00:35:56,842 I'm gonna head out, okay? 1025 00:35:56,844 --> 00:35:57,893 Cool. 1026 00:35:57,928 --> 00:35:59,344 Daddy, stay for dinner, please? 1027 00:35:59,379 --> 00:36:00,562 Oh buddy, dinner's not like for like a few... 1028 00:36:00,597 --> 00:36:01,813 No, Daddy! 1029 00:36:01,849 --> 00:36:03,381 Mommy, make him stay! 1030 00:36:03,417 --> 00:36:05,765 Please don't let him leave. 1031 00:36:06,320 --> 00:36:07,486 It's okay, Jake. Stay. 1032 00:36:07,521 --> 00:36:08,904 I'll order some pizzas in a little bit. 1033 00:36:08,939 --> 00:36:10,355 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 1034 00:36:10,357 --> 00:36:12,441 Yes, yes, I will stay for dinner. 1035 00:36:12,493 --> 00:36:14,025 - Yeah! - Ah! 1036 00:36:14,077 --> 00:36:16,828 - Yay! - All right go up, go clean up. 1037 00:36:20,367 --> 00:36:22,534 All right, let's get in the works. 1038 00:36:22,536 --> 00:36:23,752 Uh, where's Jonas? 1039 00:36:23,787 --> 00:36:25,587 I don't know, In-N-Out Burger? 1040 00:36:25,622 --> 00:36:27,205 I think she's drinking again. 1041 00:36:27,207 --> 00:36:29,791 So sad and so bloated. 1042 00:36:29,843 --> 00:36:31,426 She had like this panic attack 1043 00:36:31,462 --> 00:36:33,545 in makeup and it was just really sad. 1044 00:36:33,547 --> 00:36:36,631 Uh, no, I think she was nervous and she wasn't drunk. 1045 00:36:36,683 --> 00:36:38,767 And that definitely wasn't a panic attack. 1046 00:36:38,802 --> 00:36:40,635 Whatever, she let herself go. 1047 00:36:40,687 --> 00:36:42,137 Let's get to work! 1048 00:36:42,189 --> 00:36:43,688 She looked real. 1049 00:36:43,713 --> 00:36:45,629 Like a real woman without tape. 1050 00:36:45,692 --> 00:36:47,359 I appreciate your opinion, Phoebe. 1051 00:36:47,394 --> 00:36:48,777 Oh wait, I don't. 1052 00:36:48,812 --> 00:36:51,396 Please, just go to makeup. 1053 00:36:53,066 --> 00:36:54,566 Bloated, Marria? 1054 00:36:54,568 --> 00:36:55,568 Really? 1055 00:36:55,619 --> 00:36:57,986 Look, Phoebes. 1056 00:36:58,038 --> 00:36:59,788 I know how this goes. 1057 00:36:59,823 --> 00:37:01,406 They test a couple of girls. 1058 00:37:01,408 --> 00:37:02,791 You don't know how it's gonna work out. 1059 00:37:02,826 --> 00:37:04,543 Portfolios lie. 1060 00:37:04,578 --> 00:37:07,078 Alicia asked me who I liked from the old days, 1061 00:37:07,103 --> 00:37:09,304 so I stacked the deck a little. 1062 00:37:09,383 --> 00:37:11,917 You stacked the deck with Jonas? 1063 00:37:11,969 --> 00:37:13,585 You should be thanking me. 1064 00:37:13,637 --> 00:37:15,253 I knew she'd get cut 1065 00:37:15,305 --> 00:37:18,306 and now it's just between you and me. 1066 00:37:18,342 --> 00:37:19,937 Oh, my God. 1067 00:37:21,261 --> 00:37:22,594 What is wrong with you? 1068 00:37:22,859 --> 00:37:24,513 What, I forgot to screw my way 1069 00:37:24,565 --> 00:37:25,597 into millions of dollars, 1070 00:37:25,649 --> 00:37:27,679 so I could drink chai tea all day? 1071 00:37:28,382 --> 00:37:29,601 Wow. 1072 00:37:29,603 --> 00:37:31,736 So how are you gonna get me axed, huh? 1073 00:37:31,772 --> 00:37:34,022 What little lie were you gonna spread 1074 00:37:34,074 --> 00:37:35,273 about me? 1075 00:37:36,443 --> 00:37:37,776 I don't need this. 1076 00:37:37,828 --> 00:37:38,910 No. 1077 00:37:38,946 --> 00:37:40,078 You don't. 1078 00:37:40,284 --> 00:37:42,100 Aren't you lucky? 1079 00:38:25,946 --> 00:38:27,210 I should head out. 1080 00:38:27,327 --> 00:38:28,743 Uh, it's late. 1081 00:38:28,795 --> 00:38:29,795 Just stay. 1082 00:38:29,830 --> 00:38:30,879 I mean, we're both beat. 1083 00:38:30,914 --> 00:38:32,464 All right, thanks. 1084 00:38:32,732 --> 00:38:34,311 Where you going? 1085 00:38:34,843 --> 00:38:36,895 Uh, couch. 1086 00:38:37,232 --> 00:38:39,831 Just sneak out before they get up. 1087 00:38:40,336 --> 00:38:42,336 Like the bad old days. 1088 00:39:02,521 --> 00:39:04,187 Oh! 1089 00:39:10,523 --> 00:39:12,073 So... 1090 00:39:13,860 --> 00:39:15,026 Right. 1091 00:39:15,078 --> 00:39:16,773 Yeah. 1092 00:39:18,081 --> 00:39:19,062 Right. 1093 00:39:20,367 --> 00:39:22,200 So is Abby joining? 1094 00:39:22,202 --> 00:39:24,335 Uh, I texted her, I haven't... I haven't heard back. 1095 00:39:24,371 --> 00:39:26,454 I give it a 50/50 chance she shows. 1096 00:39:26,506 --> 00:39:27,705 Wow, what does that mean? 1097 00:39:28,842 --> 00:39:30,091 I don't know what that means. 1098 00:39:30,126 --> 00:39:31,175 That means she's not telling. 1099 00:39:31,211 --> 00:39:32,844 - See. - Hey, how was the shoot? 1100 00:39:32,879 --> 00:39:34,595 Yeah, Ms. Fancy Pants. 1101 00:39:34,631 --> 00:39:35,880 - I quit. - Uh-oh. 1102 00:39:35,932 --> 00:39:36,932 What? 1103 00:39:37,171 --> 00:39:38,015 Really? 1104 00:39:38,051 --> 00:39:39,100 I know. 1105 00:39:39,135 --> 00:39:40,685 Um, I guess 1106 00:39:40,720 --> 00:39:42,019 I thought it would be an ego boost, 1107 00:39:42,055 --> 00:39:43,521 but it turns out that, ah... 1108 00:39:43,556 --> 00:39:45,106 beautiful girls are disposable. 1109 00:39:45,141 --> 00:39:47,024 Yeah, cutthroat doesn't even begin 1110 00:39:47,060 --> 00:39:48,025 to describe that world. 1111 00:39:48,061 --> 00:39:49,061 And now that I'm ancient, 1112 00:39:49,112 --> 00:39:50,144 it's a lot worse. 1113 00:39:50,312 --> 00:39:51,145 I know. 1114 00:39:51,197 --> 00:39:52,530 By the way, when they say, 1115 00:39:52,565 --> 00:39:54,282 "No Photoshop and no makeup," 1116 00:39:54,317 --> 00:39:55,316 what they mean is they tape 1117 00:39:55,368 --> 00:39:56,484 and they moisturize the crap out of you 1118 00:39:56,536 --> 00:39:57,902 and then hit you with the supernova of fill light. 1119 00:39:57,954 --> 00:39:58,903 I knew it. 1120 00:39:58,955 --> 00:39:59,904 Wow. 1121 00:39:59,956 --> 00:40:01,122 Think I need to find something 1122 00:40:01,157 --> 00:40:02,623 that makes me feel good about myself 1123 00:40:02,659 --> 00:40:03,624 for the right reasons. 1124 00:40:03,660 --> 00:40:04,742 Right on, lady, I get it. 1125 00:40:04,895 --> 00:40:07,046 What will that be? 1126 00:40:07,414 --> 00:40:08,796 That is the question. 1127 00:40:08,984 --> 00:40:10,214 I don't know. 1128 00:40:10,250 --> 00:40:11,749 I grew up really fast 1129 00:40:11,751 --> 00:40:12,750 and I skipped a lot of steps, 1130 00:40:12,752 --> 00:40:13,885 so I need to go back 1131 00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:15,136 and walk a little bit slower 1132 00:40:15,171 --> 00:40:16,220 and see what I see. 1133 00:40:16,256 --> 00:40:17,472 What is this an incantation, 1134 00:40:17,507 --> 00:40:18,973 are you about to turn me into a newt? 1135 00:40:19,008 --> 00:40:21,175 Well, that sounds good. 1136 00:40:21,227 --> 00:40:22,530 Thank you, Julia. 1137 00:40:22,555 --> 00:40:25,640 So what's the first step you're gonna be stepping? 1138 00:40:25,899 --> 00:40:27,098 I don't know, 1139 00:40:27,150 --> 00:40:28,599 but as soon as I do know, 1140 00:40:28,651 --> 00:40:30,685 you two will be the first I tell. 1141 00:40:30,737 --> 00:40:32,570 - I love it. - Newt, how about that? 1142 00:40:32,605 --> 00:40:33,771 - I can't wait. - I can't wait. 1143 00:40:33,823 --> 00:40:35,990 Yay, jinx, buy me a Coke. 1144 00:40:36,025 --> 00:40:37,408 - I'm hungry. - Yes. 1145 00:40:37,444 --> 00:40:39,610 - Are you hungry? - Yes, I'm always hungry. 1146 00:40:55,210 --> 00:40:56,511 You know I love you, right? 1147 00:40:57,171 --> 00:40:58,296 I do. 1148 00:40:59,997 --> 00:41:01,530 And I love you forever. 1149 00:41:04,551 --> 00:41:06,435 And we just can't fix it. 1150 00:41:07,690 --> 00:41:11,804 We are just these people together. 1151 00:41:14,614 --> 00:41:15,947 Are the kids gonna be okay? 1152 00:41:15,982 --> 00:41:17,698 Yeah, we'll make sure of it. 1153 00:41:19,931 --> 00:41:21,077 Okay. 1154 00:41:23,051 --> 00:41:25,719 We gave it a good second go, right? 1155 00:41:29,128 --> 00:41:30,249 We sure did. 1156 00:41:40,173 --> 00:41:41,452 Jake. 1157 00:41:45,201 --> 00:41:47,008 I think my heart is breaking. 1158 00:42:06,694 --> 00:42:11,992 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 74650

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