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1
00:00:00,763 --> 00:00:02,262
Life goes on
2
00:00:02,298 --> 00:00:04,431
and so do we
3
00:00:04,466 --> 00:00:05,699
just how we do it
4
00:00:05,734 --> 00:00:08,936
is no mystery
5
00:00:08,971 --> 00:00:10,938
one by one
6
00:00:10,973 --> 00:00:13,173
we fill the days
7
00:00:13,209 --> 00:00:17,377
we find a thousand
different ways
8
00:00:17,413 --> 00:00:19,079
sometimes the answer
9
00:00:19,114 --> 00:00:21,782
can be hard to find
10
00:00:21,817 --> 00:00:24,718
that's something
i will never be
11
00:00:24,753 --> 00:00:26,720
I'm always here
12
00:00:26,755 --> 00:00:30,657
for anything that you need
13
00:00:30,693 --> 00:00:32,593
rain or shine
14
00:00:32,628 --> 00:00:34,828
I'll be the one
15
00:00:34,863 --> 00:00:35,963
to share it all
16
00:00:35,998 --> 00:00:39,700
as life goes on
17
00:00:39,735 --> 00:00:43,103
we share it all
18
00:00:43,138 --> 00:00:49,076
as life goes on
19
00:01:06,045 --> 00:01:08,579
oh, Laverne, would you make
reservations for two
20
00:01:08,615 --> 00:01:09,747
at the clubhouse?
21
00:01:09,783 --> 00:01:12,316
7:30. Len and I are gonna have
a little dinner
22
00:01:12,352 --> 00:01:13,918
before the jai-alai matches
tonight.
23
00:01:13,953 --> 00:01:18,489
Fine.
24
00:01:18,525 --> 00:01:19,991
Did I ever tell you
about the time
25
00:01:20,026 --> 00:01:22,026
that Lenny and I... yes.
26
00:01:22,061 --> 00:01:23,795
I haven't told you anything yet.
27
00:01:23,830 --> 00:01:25,396
I have heard it all.
28
00:01:25,432 --> 00:01:27,198
Pitching pennies
in the schoolyard.
29
00:01:27,233 --> 00:01:29,767
The time you both got caught
with the national geographics.
30
00:01:29,803 --> 00:01:31,803
And that unfortunate incident
with the training bras
31
00:01:31,838 --> 00:01:33,905
and shoe Polish.
32
00:01:33,932 --> 00:01:35,635
Well now that he's moved
moved to Miami
33
00:01:35,675 --> 00:01:37,475
we'll be working
on some new stories for you.
34
00:01:37,510 --> 00:01:40,638
Well, I am just thrilled
beyond belief.
35
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:44,182
Now, room 3, sick kid.
Room 2, sick kid.
36
00:01:44,217 --> 00:01:46,851
Room 1, hypochondriac.
37
00:01:46,886 --> 00:01:50,521
- Jeffrey millstein's here?
- Uh-huh.
38
00:01:50,557 --> 00:01:52,023
Here we go again.
39
00:01:52,058 --> 00:01:55,293
Well, Jeffery.
40
00:01:55,328 --> 00:01:57,495
- How are we today?
- Horrible.
41
00:01:57,530 --> 00:02:01,532
I think I've got prostate
problems.
42
00:02:01,568 --> 00:02:04,101
Well, I doubt that.
43
00:02:04,137 --> 00:02:06,237
You hardly have a prostate.
44
00:02:06,272 --> 00:02:08,072
I have all the classic symptoms.
45
00:02:08,107 --> 00:02:13,544
Insomnia. Irritability.
Weak stream.
46
00:02:13,580 --> 00:02:15,580
Well, exactly where does it
hurt this time?
47
00:02:15,615 --> 00:02:17,648
I've got a dull pain right here.
48
00:02:17,684 --> 00:02:19,717
Uh-huh. Well, you know,
this could be
49
00:02:19,752 --> 00:02:21,619
just a plain, old-fashioned
tummy ache.
50
00:02:21,654 --> 00:02:23,721
Not possible. I watch my diet.
51
00:02:23,756 --> 00:02:27,291
Eat low sodium. Low sugar.
52
00:02:27,327 --> 00:02:28,726
Maybe it's cholesterol.
53
00:02:28,761 --> 00:02:32,864
My school lunch program's loaded
with saturated fats.
54
00:02:32,899 --> 00:02:35,533
Well, you may be right.
There could be something there.
55
00:02:35,568 --> 00:02:38,269
But we would need
some further testing to confirm.
56
00:02:38,304 --> 00:02:39,871
- Really?
- Yeah.
57
00:02:39,906 --> 00:02:42,473
I think that we should schedule
you for an upper g.I. Series,
58
00:02:42,509 --> 00:02:45,243
which as you know
is a very unpleasant test.
59
00:02:45,278 --> 00:02:46,811
That's the one
where you have to drink
60
00:02:46,846 --> 00:02:49,680
that horrible-tasting liquid
barium.
61
00:02:49,716 --> 00:02:52,550
Perhaps I better rethink this,
Dr. Weston.
62
00:02:52,585 --> 00:02:56,187
Maybe I'll just go home
and eat something binding.
63
00:03:02,898 --> 00:03:04,698
- Hi, buddy.
- Hi, Charles.
64
00:03:04,733 --> 00:03:06,633
Thought maybe you want
to do something tonight.
65
00:03:06,669 --> 00:03:08,669
Oh, sorry. I can't.
I have plans with Leonard.
66
00:03:08,704 --> 00:03:10,003
Him again.
67
00:03:10,039 --> 00:03:11,505
You've been seeing
an awful lot of this guy
68
00:03:11,540 --> 00:03:12,506
since he moved here.
69
00:03:12,541 --> 00:03:15,242
- Yeah, a few times.
- Six.
70
00:03:15,277 --> 00:03:17,644
- What?
- Six times.
71
00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:18,979
The boat show Thursday was five
72
00:03:19,014 --> 00:03:21,481
and dinner at Joe's stone crab
was six.
73
00:03:21,517 --> 00:03:23,350
Charley, what is going on here?
74
00:03:23,385 --> 00:03:26,353
You like him better than me.
75
00:03:26,388 --> 00:03:29,189
Charley, come on.
76
00:03:29,225 --> 00:03:31,391
I didn't hear a "no, I don't."
77
00:03:31,427 --> 00:03:33,093
- Harry.
- Hey.
78
00:03:33,128 --> 00:03:35,329
Grapefruit
from my own private tree.
79
00:03:35,364 --> 00:03:36,730
Thanks. That's great.
80
00:03:36,765 --> 00:03:38,599
I'll tell you,
it's a real culture shock
81
00:03:38,634 --> 00:03:40,334
when you move from Syracuse
to Miami.
82
00:03:40,369 --> 00:03:43,036
It's 5 degrees there.
It's 83 degrees here.
83
00:03:43,072 --> 00:03:44,304
Just for old time's sake,
84
00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:46,873
I got up this morning
and shoveled off my walk.
85
00:03:48,911 --> 00:03:51,745
- Ahem.
- Oh, yes. Excuse me.
86
00:03:51,780 --> 00:03:53,413
Leonard, ts is my neighbor
Charley.
87
00:03:53,444 --> 00:03:55,420
Charley, this is...
I know, I know.
88
00:03:55,451 --> 00:03:56,650
Your best friend. Lenny.
89
00:03:56,685 --> 00:03:58,114
I guess you guys
are pretty tight, huh?
90
00:03:58,153 --> 00:03:59,686
Yes. That we are.
91
00:03:59,722 --> 00:04:01,588
Be hard to find something
we haven't done together.
92
00:04:01,624 --> 00:04:02,723
Oh, yeah?
93
00:04:02,758 --> 00:04:03,890
You guys ever play the game
94
00:04:03,926 --> 00:04:05,492
where two guys get together,
drink beer,
95
00:04:05,527 --> 00:04:07,394
and one guy makes a joke,
tries to make the other guy
96
00:04:07,429 --> 00:04:09,296
spit beer through his nose?
97
00:04:11,267 --> 00:04:14,835
That's the kind of thing
you do with a real friend.
98
00:04:14,870 --> 00:04:16,003
I better go.
99
00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:17,804
Look, Charley,
we're going to jai-alai.
100
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,139
You're welcome to join us.
101
00:04:19,174 --> 00:04:21,308
No thanks.
I'll find something else to do.
102
00:04:21,343 --> 00:04:24,478
Oh, by the way, jai-alai,
that's seven.
103
00:04:24,513 --> 00:04:26,346
Seven times.
104
00:04:26,382 --> 00:04:29,750
Is it me or does he remind you
of that kid we used to beat up?
105
00:04:29,785 --> 00:04:32,019
Yeah.
106
00:04:32,054 --> 00:04:34,588
I had a real scary experience
this morning, Harry.
107
00:04:34,623 --> 00:04:36,923
I was in the supermarket
and this not-bad-looking woman
108
00:04:36,959 --> 00:04:39,860
comes up to me, asks me
if I'm shopping for my wife,
109
00:04:39,895 --> 00:04:41,228
I tell her "no, I'm a widower,"
110
00:04:41,263 --> 00:04:42,696
and then she starts
hitting on me.
111
00:04:42,731 --> 00:04:45,265
I'm a grown man, Harry.
But I fled.
112
00:04:45,301 --> 00:04:47,267
I couldn't handle it.
No. Me neither.
113
00:04:47,303 --> 00:04:49,036
Has it occurred to you
that we are both
114
00:04:49,071 --> 00:04:52,105
in exactly the same place
we were 40 years ago?
115
00:04:52,141 --> 00:04:54,975
Yeah. When we were 15,
we couldn't handle women either.
116
00:04:55,010 --> 00:04:57,644
True. But at least then
we can lie
117
00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,513
and brag to the guys
how we made out.
118
00:04:59,548 --> 00:05:01,515
Hi, daddy. Hi, uncle Leonard.
119
00:05:01,550 --> 00:05:02,816
Is it okay if we use your vcr?
120
00:05:02,851 --> 00:05:04,351
We rented a couple movies.
121
00:05:04,386 --> 00:05:06,687
Yes. Another thrilling
Friday night.
122
00:05:06,722 --> 00:05:08,121
If I'm feeling really madcap,
123
00:05:08,157 --> 00:05:10,457
I may return them
without rewinding.
124
00:05:10,492 --> 00:05:12,793
What'd you get?
125
00:05:12,828 --> 00:05:14,828
I got pee-wee's big adventure.
126
00:05:14,863 --> 00:05:19,132
Judgment at nuremberg.
127
00:05:19,168 --> 00:05:21,101
Come on.
Forget about the movies.
128
00:05:21,136 --> 00:05:22,469
Come with us to jai-alai.
129
00:05:22,504 --> 00:05:23,670
Again? We've been out
with you guys
130
00:05:23,706 --> 00:05:24,671
three times this week.
131
00:05:24,707 --> 00:05:25,939
Come on. It's fun.
132
00:05:25,974 --> 00:05:27,774
It's exciting.
You can win a lot of money.
133
00:05:27,810 --> 00:05:29,776
Oh, it does sound fun.
Maybe we should go.
134
00:05:29,812 --> 00:05:31,011
No. You all go ahead.
135
00:05:31,046 --> 00:05:32,579
I can't condone any sport
136
00:05:32,614 --> 00:05:34,548
that involves cruelty
to animals.
137
00:05:34,583 --> 00:05:36,283
There are no animals
in jai-alai.
138
00:05:36,318 --> 00:05:41,388
- There are no roosters?
- No.
139
00:05:41,423 --> 00:05:44,391
Oh. Okay then.
140
00:05:44,426 --> 00:05:47,194
I wonder what that thing is
I've been donating to.
141
00:05:47,229 --> 00:05:50,163
Oh, come on. Let's go.
142
00:05:52,634 --> 00:05:55,502
God, it was amazing
how you hit that 3-4 perfecta.
143
00:05:55,537 --> 00:06:00,907
This has never happened to me.
I am $288 richer.
144
00:06:00,943 --> 00:06:02,709
And I have you to thank for it.
145
00:06:02,745 --> 00:06:06,179
All I said was don't bet
on the guy with the cast.
146
00:06:06,215 --> 00:06:10,016
11:30.
147
00:06:10,052 --> 00:06:13,086
Awfully late for a work night.
148
00:06:13,122 --> 00:06:15,555
Charley, I don't remember
giving you a key.
149
00:06:15,591 --> 00:06:17,157
I was watching
the solid gold dancers
150
00:06:17,192 --> 00:06:18,392
on your 35-inch screen.
151
00:06:18,427 --> 00:06:20,327
Only I was too depressed
to enjoy it.
152
00:06:20,362 --> 00:06:21,495
Looking at those dancers,
153
00:06:21,530 --> 00:06:23,230
I kept thinking
"thighs you can always see,
154
00:06:23,265 --> 00:06:26,433
but friends, those are rare."
155
00:06:26,468 --> 00:06:29,403
I think you've got
a bumper sticker there.
156
00:06:29,438 --> 00:06:30,637
Come on, Charley, join us.
157
00:06:30,672 --> 00:06:31,838
We're gonna have
a little coffee,
158
00:06:31,874 --> 00:06:32,906
a little conversation.
159
00:06:32,941 --> 00:06:35,075
Sure. Intentionally
pick something
160
00:06:35,110 --> 00:06:39,246
you know I'm not interested in.
161
00:06:39,281 --> 00:06:41,314
Decaf okay for everybody?
162
00:06:41,350 --> 00:06:43,216
- Oh, I'll help you, daddy.
- No, you stay, baby.
163
00:06:43,252 --> 00:06:44,751
I can't stay,
I've got to get up early
164
00:06:44,787 --> 00:06:45,952
and catch a plane to New York.
165
00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:47,654
Wait. What?
You're going to New York?
166
00:06:47,689 --> 00:06:49,089
Yes. I'm a material witness
167
00:06:49,124 --> 00:06:51,992
in the mancuso
multiple-stabbing case.
168
00:06:52,027 --> 00:06:55,762
Try to take in a show, dear.
169
00:06:55,798 --> 00:07:00,667
Oh, Leonard, I got a little
surprise for you.
170
00:07:00,702 --> 00:07:02,969
Oh, you found
the old photo album.
171
00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:05,939
No, you guys sit.
You enjoy that.
172
00:07:05,974 --> 00:07:08,608
I'm gonna kill your father
for this.
173
00:07:08,644 --> 00:07:10,110
He's only doing this
to remind me
174
00:07:10,145 --> 00:07:11,778
of how old we are.
175
00:07:11,814 --> 00:07:13,780
Oh, come on. You're not old.
176
00:07:13,816 --> 00:07:16,663
Oh, no? Watch this.
177
00:07:17,486 --> 00:07:20,454
You can actually see
my hairline receding.
178
00:07:20,489 --> 00:07:23,457
When you get to my crew cut,
179
00:07:23,492 --> 00:07:25,572
don't laugh too much.
180
00:07:25,594 --> 00:07:27,694
Oh, is that you and daddy?
181
00:07:27,729 --> 00:07:29,095
Yeah, that's me dressed
as an Indian
182
00:07:29,130 --> 00:07:30,970
and your dad dressed as a cop.
183
00:07:30,999 --> 00:07:32,732
Cops and Indians?
184
00:07:32,767 --> 00:07:33,933
Your dad forgot to call me
185
00:07:33,969 --> 00:07:36,336
before he left the house
that day.
186
00:07:36,371 --> 00:07:38,838
Here we are in a canoe
at summer camp.
187
00:07:38,873 --> 00:07:41,708
Forget that one.
Hold it. Hold it. Hold it.
188
00:07:41,743 --> 00:07:44,444
What was that back there? Ah!
189
00:07:44,479 --> 00:07:48,463
Don't let her see that picture
of us mooning.
190
00:07:49,050 --> 00:07:51,684
- Too late, daddy.
- Yeah.
191
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,020
Your dad got expelled
for that one
192
00:07:54,055 --> 00:07:57,123
because he took the rap
for both of us as usual.
193
00:07:57,158 --> 00:07:59,959
Oh, now,
this is an interesting one.
194
00:07:59,995 --> 00:08:02,061
This was our first double date.
195
00:08:02,097 --> 00:08:04,279
Those are the Huber twins.
196
00:08:05,667 --> 00:08:07,474
The Huber twins?
197
00:08:07,669 --> 00:08:09,203
Yes.
198
00:08:09,872 --> 00:08:12,028
They're very attractive.
199
00:08:12,941 --> 00:08:14,901
Yes, they are.
200
00:08:17,946 --> 00:08:20,153
And this one is...
201
00:08:21,750 --> 00:08:24,264
I don't know what this one is.
202
00:08:30,058 --> 00:08:31,498
Hey, have you guys
seen the one of me
203
00:08:31,526 --> 00:08:33,159
in the Bermuda shorts yet?
204
00:08:33,194 --> 00:08:36,195
Ohoo hoo hoo hoo hoo.
205
00:08:45,836 --> 00:08:48,837
- Whew.
- Yeah, whew.
206
00:08:48,872 --> 00:08:52,121
- Good.
- Great. Great.
207
00:08:52,809 --> 00:08:54,094
Good.
208
00:08:55,412 --> 00:08:56,978
Then why didn't I feel anything?
209
00:08:57,014 --> 00:08:59,514
Oh, my god, I'm glad
you said that.
210
00:08:59,549 --> 00:09:02,117
I didn't either.
I felt nothing, Leonard.
211
00:09:02,152 --> 00:09:04,986
Nothing. A vacuum.
Less than nothing. Zip.
212
00:09:05,022 --> 00:09:07,923
That's okay. I get it.
Thank you.
213
00:09:07,958 --> 00:09:12,287
You know what this is.
It's guilt.
214
00:09:12,462 --> 00:09:14,529
We've been seeing each other
for over a week
215
00:09:14,564 --> 00:09:16,097
and we haven't told him yet.
216
00:09:16,133 --> 00:09:17,499
I think you're right.
It is guilt.
217
00:09:17,534 --> 00:09:18,566
I know it can't be me.
218
00:09:18,602 --> 00:09:21,341
I'm making
all my usual moves here.
219
00:09:21,850 --> 00:09:23,171
Maybe we should tell him.
220
00:09:23,206 --> 00:09:24,906
Are you nuts?
Harry has a temper.
221
00:09:24,942 --> 00:09:26,274
I know from experience.
222
00:09:26,310 --> 00:09:29,878
He caught me once
making eyes at his Huber twin.
223
00:09:29,913 --> 00:09:33,014
This would probably bother him
even more.
224
00:09:33,050 --> 00:09:34,950
So what are we gonna do?
225
00:09:34,985 --> 00:09:37,473
Well, we could be wrong.
226
00:09:38,121 --> 00:09:40,609
Could be wrong
about this guilt thing.
227
00:09:43,509 --> 00:09:46,176
Nope. Nope. Not wrong.
228
00:09:46,212 --> 00:09:48,178
It feels like Harry's
in here watching us,
229
00:09:48,214 --> 00:09:50,547
looking down in judgment.
230
00:09:50,583 --> 00:09:53,009
Leonard, that's silly.
231
00:09:54,620 --> 00:09:56,720
I love your father.
I don't want to hurt him.
232
00:09:56,756 --> 00:09:58,487
I agree.
233
00:09:59,058 --> 00:10:02,111
Let's hurt him a little bit.
234
00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:05,963
No. You're right.
We can't do this.
235
00:10:05,998 --> 00:10:09,033
I feel like I'm betraying
my best friend.
236
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:11,707
So what are we going to do?
237
00:10:19,779 --> 00:10:21,445
Anything?
238
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:24,214
Remember that young
hypochondriac you cured?
239
00:10:24,250 --> 00:10:28,682
- Jeffrey millstein?
-
he's back
240
00:10:32,024 --> 00:10:36,360
Jeffrey. Wow. Little surprised
to see you here.
241
00:10:36,395 --> 00:10:38,262
Dr. Weston, I've decided to take
242
00:10:38,297 --> 00:10:40,164
that upper g.I. Series.
243
00:10:40,199 --> 00:10:42,433
- You have?
- Yes.
244
00:10:42,468 --> 00:10:43,600
And just to be sure,
245
00:10:43,636 --> 00:10:46,270
you better give me
lower g.I. As well.
246
00:10:46,305 --> 00:10:50,307
As you know, this is a very
complicated procedure.
247
00:10:50,343 --> 00:10:51,308
I'm all prepped.
248
00:10:51,344 --> 00:10:52,376
I've taken the Liberty
249
00:10:52,411 --> 00:10:55,521
of having my colon irrigated.
250
00:10:58,150 --> 00:11:01,618
Jeffrey, there is nothing
wrong with you.
251
00:11:01,654 --> 00:11:04,488
What I would like you to do
is talk to an associate of mine.
252
00:11:04,523 --> 00:11:07,324
A different kind of doctor.
Oh, a specialist?
253
00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:08,926
A therapist.
254
00:11:08,961 --> 00:11:11,195
He can talk with you
and he'll help you work out
255
00:11:11,230 --> 00:11:12,663
some of these problems.
256
00:11:12,665 --> 00:11:14,798
His office
is not in a high-rise, is it?
257
00:11:14,834 --> 00:11:16,266
I have a phobia about that.
258
00:11:16,302 --> 00:11:18,373
No, no, no.
It's the ground floor.
259
00:11:18,404 --> 00:11:19,937
You'll love him. I promise you.
260
00:11:19,972 --> 00:11:22,773
Please. Now you tell your dad
that I'll stop by his office
261
00:11:22,808 --> 00:11:24,441
and I'll talk to him
about this, all right?
262
00:11:24,477 --> 00:11:25,442
- Okay.
- Okay.
263
00:11:25,478 --> 00:11:27,611
Jeffrey, your first session,
264
00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:29,947
I would bring up
that colon irrigation thing.
265
00:11:29,982 --> 00:11:31,847
Right.
266
00:11:33,919 --> 00:11:35,185
- Hi, Harry.
- Len!
267
00:11:35,221 --> 00:11:36,387
Where the heck have you been?
268
00:11:36,422 --> 00:11:37,788
I haven't seen you
in a couple of weeks.
269
00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:38,856
That's right. That's right.
270
00:11:38,891 --> 00:11:40,591
That's why I came
to talk to you.
271
00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:42,066
You see, I've been seeing
this woman.
272
00:11:42,094 --> 00:11:46,327
Ah. Len, I'm so happy for you.
273
00:11:47,233 --> 00:11:50,000
I wouldn't get too happy
just yet.
274
00:11:50,036 --> 00:11:52,770
You see, the woman
I've been dating is Carol.
275
00:11:57,736 --> 00:11:59,369
My Carol?
276
00:11:59,408 --> 00:12:01,078
I know this isn't easy for you.
277
00:12:01,113 --> 00:12:02,246
We didn't plan it this way.
278
00:12:02,281 --> 00:12:03,514
We tried to fight against it.
279
00:12:03,549 --> 00:12:05,082
But we just like each other
too much.
280
00:12:05,117 --> 00:12:08,585
That's all. Harry?
Are you all right, Harry?
281
00:12:08,621 --> 00:12:11,522
I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm calm.
282
00:12:11,557 --> 00:12:12,856
This is calmness here.
I'm dealing.
283
00:12:12,892 --> 00:12:14,691
I'm dealing with this.
284
00:12:14,727 --> 00:12:17,094
You're seeing... you're seeing me
dealing with this.
285
00:12:17,129 --> 00:12:18,429
I'm proud of you, Harry.
286
00:12:18,464 --> 00:12:20,364
You have really grown
since the Huber twin incident.
287
00:12:20,399 --> 00:12:21,732
Yeah, well, I shouldn't
be shocked.
288
00:12:21,767 --> 00:12:23,233
I mean, it is the '80s, right?
289
00:12:23,269 --> 00:12:24,902
I mean, you know,
guys are getting perms.
290
00:12:24,937 --> 00:12:28,972
Girls are pumping iron.
Acid rain. Global warming.
291
00:12:29,008 --> 00:12:32,309
And my best friend
is dating my firstborn.
292
00:12:32,344 --> 00:12:34,044
Harry, relax. Take it easy.
293
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,512
I am relaxed. And it is easy.
294
00:12:35,548 --> 00:12:37,247
It's okay. There is a peace.
295
00:12:37,283 --> 00:12:39,683
There is a calmness.
And there is a tranquility.
296
00:12:39,718 --> 00:12:42,586
And there is an age difference
of 25 years.
297
00:12:42,621 --> 00:12:44,054
- Maybe I better go.
- No, no, no.
298
00:12:44,090 --> 00:12:45,556
I'm sorry. No, please, don't go.
299
00:12:45,591 --> 00:12:49,760
Len, please just let me...
Let me throw you out.
300
00:12:49,795 --> 00:12:53,530
Get out!
Get out of my office, you rat!
301
00:12:53,566 --> 00:12:57,101
You turncoat! You cradle robber!
302
00:12:57,136 --> 00:13:00,304
Uh, perhaps I'll bring
Samantha back
303
00:13:00,339 --> 00:13:02,875
for her shot tomorrow.
304
00:13:03,843 --> 00:13:05,609
Watch out for the guy
in the elevator.
305
00:13:05,644 --> 00:13:08,278
Keep an eye on your daughter.
306
00:13:18,475 --> 00:13:20,491
Hi, Harry. What's new?
307
00:13:20,526 --> 00:13:21,825
Well, if you must know, Charley,
308
00:13:21,861 --> 00:13:23,560
I'm not in the best of moods.
309
00:13:23,596 --> 00:13:26,869
By the way,
I'd like you to meet Rick.
310
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:32,767
- Hello, Rick.
- Hi. I'm in valet parking.
311
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,888
Rick is my new best friend.
312
00:13:37,343 --> 00:13:39,805
Yeah, he's my new
number one amigo.
313
00:13:40,079 --> 00:13:41,211
You may have Leonard,
314
00:13:41,247 --> 00:13:43,514
but the rickster here
is my new main man.
315
00:13:43,549 --> 00:13:45,082
Charley, Leonard and I
316
00:13:45,117 --> 00:13:47,384
are not exactly best friends
anymore.
317
00:13:47,419 --> 00:13:50,454
- Really?
- He's been dating Carol.
318
00:13:50,489 --> 00:13:54,660
Ooh. Bad move.
Barbara's the party girl.
319
00:13:56,095 --> 00:13:58,795
So I guess you and Leonard
are on the outs, huh?
320
00:13:58,831 --> 00:14:00,164
You could say that.
321
00:14:00,199 --> 00:14:01,665
Does Leonard have a history
322
00:14:01,700 --> 00:14:02,933
of doing this kind of stuff?
323
00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:04,601
Look, Rick, I really don't feel
324
00:14:04,637 --> 00:14:06,503
like discussing this with you.
325
00:14:06,539 --> 00:14:09,953
Hey, Rick, the magic's gone.
Beat it.
326
00:14:12,111 --> 00:14:13,076
For 20 bucks,
327
00:14:13,112 --> 00:14:14,278
you think you could rent
a friend
328
00:14:14,313 --> 00:14:16,079
with a little more class.
329
00:14:16,115 --> 00:14:17,849
Boy, after this Rick thing,
330
00:14:17,874 --> 00:14:19,340
I really know
what you're going through
331
00:14:19,375 --> 00:14:20,388
with Leonard.
332
00:14:20,424 --> 00:14:21,552
Want to talk about it?
333
00:14:21,591 --> 00:14:22,786
No. I don't. I really don't.
334
00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:25,719
Okay, pal. See you around.
335
00:14:27,428 --> 00:14:31,196
Hi, Carol. What's old?
336
00:14:32,366 --> 00:14:33,807
Ha!
337
00:14:37,872 --> 00:14:39,672
- We need to talk.
- Oh. Huh?
338
00:14:39,707 --> 00:14:41,640
Had a little chat with Leonard?
339
00:14:41,676 --> 00:14:46,078
Daddy, I can imagine
what you're feeling.
340
00:14:46,114 --> 00:14:47,913
This must be very weird for you.
341
00:14:47,949 --> 00:14:49,748
Yes, a little.
342
00:14:49,784 --> 00:14:53,819
My 55-year-old best friend
and my daughter.
343
00:14:53,855 --> 00:14:56,789
Next thing you know,
we'll all be on Geraldo.
344
00:14:58,993 --> 00:15:01,494
Daddy, you don't know
how lucky I am
345
00:15:01,529 --> 00:15:03,496
to find someone like Leonard.
346
00:15:03,531 --> 00:15:06,031
Do you know the kind of guys
that are out there?
347
00:15:06,067 --> 00:15:07,433
I'll tell you.
348
00:15:07,468 --> 00:15:09,168
There are men who swear
they're divorced
349
00:15:09,203 --> 00:15:11,804
but just can't seem
to get away on Christmas.
350
00:15:11,839 --> 00:15:13,706
Men whose idea
of a night out dancing
351
00:15:13,741 --> 00:15:16,383
is running naked
around your couch.
352
00:15:16,744 --> 00:15:19,712
And my personal favorite,
the vampire men,
353
00:15:19,747 --> 00:15:23,269
who find it necessary to leave
before the sun comes up.
354
00:15:24,585 --> 00:15:27,219
Suddenly this man comes along
and, yes,
355
00:15:27,255 --> 00:15:30,723
he's my dad's best friend
and yes, he's older,
356
00:15:30,758 --> 00:15:33,192
but he's sweet,
and he's sensitive,
357
00:15:33,227 --> 00:15:35,227
and he mes me feel good.
358
00:15:35,257 --> 00:15:37,131
And daddy, he listens to me.
359
00:15:37,165 --> 00:15:41,333
Stop it. You're making me want
to date him.
360
00:15:44,172 --> 00:15:47,206
What I'm trying to say is...
361
00:15:47,241 --> 00:15:50,176
We would like you to be okay
with this.
362
00:15:52,054 --> 00:15:53,812
How can I look at you
with that face
363
00:15:53,848 --> 00:15:57,383
and tell you you can't have
what you want so very much?
364
00:16:04,977 --> 00:16:06,959
- So?
- So Dr. Philips said
365
00:16:06,994 --> 00:16:09,128
there's nothing physically wrong
with me at all.
366
00:16:09,149 --> 00:16:11,064
The core of my conflict
is unconscious anger
367
00:16:11,098 --> 00:16:12,698
towards my parents.
368
00:16:12,733 --> 00:16:15,772
Uh, Jeffrey, I'm so glad
it's working out for you.
369
00:16:15,803 --> 00:16:17,002
Don't touch me.
370
00:16:17,038 --> 00:16:20,912
My hostility extends
to all authority figures.
371
00:16:22,443 --> 00:16:25,377
- Is Harry here?
- He's in there.
372
00:16:25,413 --> 00:16:26,979
But if you set him
to hollering again,
373
00:16:27,014 --> 00:16:29,982
I'll be on you like bugs
on a windshield.
374
00:16:30,017 --> 00:16:31,250
All right, good boy, Jeff.
375
00:16:31,285 --> 00:16:32,818
I'll see you in time.
376
00:16:32,853 --> 00:16:34,486
Harry, I need to talk to you
about Carol.
377
00:16:34,522 --> 00:16:36,088
Have you got a minute?
378
00:16:36,123 --> 00:16:37,323
It depends.
379
00:16:37,358 --> 00:16:40,659
Is the word "grandfather"
gonna be coming up?
380
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:44,002
- No.
- Good. Come in.
381
00:16:52,161 --> 00:16:54,227
Just thought I should tell you
that I'm not gonna be seeing
382
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,213
your daughter anymore.
383
00:16:57,232 --> 00:16:59,533
Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
384
00:16:59,568 --> 00:17:01,601
Excuse me. I think I have
something in my eye.
385
00:17:09,344 --> 00:17:10,777
So what was the problem?
386
00:17:10,813 --> 00:17:13,280
I just realized
that for the past two weeks,
387
00:17:13,315 --> 00:17:15,015
I've been very flattered
by the attentions
388
00:17:15,050 --> 00:17:16,950
of a pretty young woman.
389
00:17:16,985 --> 00:17:18,251
Carol made me feel great.
390
00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:20,353
She had me turning cartwheels.
391
00:17:20,389 --> 00:17:24,691
Harry, I have back problems.
I'm too old to turn cartwheels.
392
00:17:24,726 --> 00:17:26,793
All right, Leonard,
let's get this over with
393
00:17:26,829 --> 00:17:28,634
very quickly, okay?
394
00:17:29,898 --> 00:17:33,556
I told you so.
I told you so. I told you so.
395
00:17:33,596 --> 00:17:35,570
All right, so how
is my Carol taking this?
396
00:17:35,611 --> 00:17:37,504
That's the other thing
i wanted to talk to you about.
397
00:17:37,539 --> 00:17:39,367
I haven't exactly told her yet.
I was hoping you would.
398
00:17:39,408 --> 00:17:41,441
Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no, no.
399
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,843
But, Harry,
you can explain it to her
400
00:17:42,878 --> 00:17:43,844
much better than I could.
401
00:17:43,879 --> 00:17:44,978
No, no, no, no.
402
00:17:45,013 --> 00:17:47,781
This is one jam
i am not bailing you out of.
403
00:17:47,816 --> 00:17:50,655
This is my daughter
you're talking about.
404
00:17:50,702 --> 00:17:54,070
You made your bed
and you can just...
405
00:17:54,105 --> 00:17:56,806
Strike that.
It's very bad wording.
406
00:17:56,841 --> 00:17:58,608
Harry, if it was anybody
but Carol,
407
00:17:58,643 --> 00:17:59,876
I could handle it.
408
00:17:59,911 --> 00:18:01,878
But you know
how emotional she is.
409
00:18:01,913 --> 00:18:05,048
Every time a relationship ends,
she falls apart.
410
00:18:05,083 --> 00:18:07,050
Remember when she broke up
with that artist?
411
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:10,232
Every time she saw
a bowl of fruit, she cried.
412
00:18:11,289 --> 00:18:14,190
All right. All right.
I'll do it.
413
00:18:14,225 --> 00:18:16,392
Seeing as how we got gridlock
in the waiting room,
414
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,027
I thought I'd bring in
your diploma
415
00:18:18,063 --> 00:18:20,430
to remind you you do have
the proper credentials
416
00:18:20,465 --> 00:18:22,606
to deal with it.
417
00:18:29,307 --> 00:18:31,908
So he tells me
he's dating Carol.
418
00:18:31,943 --> 00:18:35,378
I call him "cradle robber,"
throw him out of my office.
419
00:18:35,413 --> 00:18:36,779
Now Carol comes over.
420
00:18:36,815 --> 00:18:40,249
She tells me she's dating
vampires.
421
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:42,719
So I said "go ahead.
Then see Leonard."
422
00:18:42,754 --> 00:18:44,821
Now Leonard's back
and he's telling me
423
00:18:44,856 --> 00:18:47,523
he's breaking up with Carol
because of his back problem.
424
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:50,960
Like somehow the cartwheel thing
is all my fault.
425
00:18:50,996 --> 00:18:54,597
Daddy, I've only been gone
two weeks.
426
00:18:54,632 --> 00:18:56,833
I mean, even in soap operas,
it takes at least a year
427
00:18:56,868 --> 00:18:58,568
for this much stuff to happen.
428
00:18:58,603 --> 00:19:01,237
Well, it happened.
429
00:19:01,272 --> 00:19:04,104
And now I have to break up
with your sister.
430
00:19:07,846 --> 00:19:12,348
Gah. Carol and uncle Leonard.
That's bizarre.
431
00:19:12,384 --> 00:19:14,717
I mean, he's your age.
432
00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:15,852
Listen, baby, help me
433
00:19:15,887 --> 00:19:17,387
with this kind
of breaking up stuff here.
434
00:19:17,422 --> 00:19:20,223
Which of these approaches
would be easier on Carol?
435
00:19:20,258 --> 00:19:23,659
"Carol, it's all for the best"
436
00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:28,197
or "Carol, it's like two ships
that pass in the night"?
437
00:19:28,233 --> 00:19:32,521
But uncle Leonard...
He's so old!
438
00:19:33,772 --> 00:19:35,438
Barbara, could you please
be repulsed
439
00:19:35,473 --> 00:19:37,471
for a different reason?
440
00:19:39,644 --> 00:19:42,512
Hi, Barbara. I have a boyfriend.
441
00:19:42,547 --> 00:19:44,647
New York was fine, thank you.
442
00:19:44,682 --> 00:19:45,748
What's up, daddy?
443
00:19:45,784 --> 00:19:47,417
When I got home,
there were five messages
444
00:19:47,452 --> 00:19:49,218
on my machine from you
all telling me
445
00:19:49,254 --> 00:19:51,354
what a wonderful,
wonderful girl I am.
446
00:19:51,389 --> 00:19:52,922
Well, you are, my sweetheart.
447
00:19:52,957 --> 00:19:54,757
You are a wonderful,
wonderful girl.
448
00:19:54,793 --> 00:19:56,025
Please. Here. Sit down, babe.
449
00:19:56,061 --> 00:19:58,127
There. Now listen.
450
00:19:58,163 --> 00:20:00,674
What I wanted to talk
to you about is...
451
00:20:02,634 --> 00:20:04,387
Ships.
452
00:20:06,242 --> 00:20:10,323
- Ships?
- Old ships.
453
00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:13,911
I'll get-I'll get it.
454
00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:15,479
I'll get it.
455
00:20:15,514 --> 00:20:18,282
Daddy was telling me
about you and uncle Leonard.
456
00:20:18,317 --> 00:20:21,051
- Isn't it incredible?
- Yeah.
457
00:20:21,087 --> 00:20:24,052
How often do you have
to dust him?
458
00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:28,025
Harry, it's the strangest thing.
459
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:30,194
I was off the hook.
I was home free.
460
00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:32,162
And then I started
feeling guilty.
461
00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:34,298
This picture of you came
into my mind.
462
00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:36,100
You were looking down on me
in judgment.
463
00:20:36,135 --> 00:20:38,269
You've been doing that
a lot lately.
464
00:20:38,304 --> 00:20:40,404
Anyway, if somebody
has to speak to Carol,
465
00:20:40,439 --> 00:20:41,672
it should be me.
466
00:20:41,707 --> 00:20:43,173
So you're saying
you don't want me
467
00:20:43,209 --> 00:20:44,341
to bail you out of this one?
468
00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:45,609
No. You haven't told her yet?
469
00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:48,400
No, I have not.
And she's in the kitchen.
470
00:20:48,426 --> 00:20:49,754
She's here?
471
00:20:49,782 --> 00:20:52,416
Boy. You accept a little
responsibility
472
00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:54,477
and it comes right smack at you.
473
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,087
Oh. Carol. Leonard's here.
474
00:20:57,123 --> 00:20:58,555
Oh, he's here.
475
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:01,058
Carol, I don't want you
to go out there and get hurt.
476
00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,893
There's something
that you should know.
477
00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,590
Uncle Leonard
is about to dump you.
478
00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:08,966
This is a good speech
you got here, Leonard.
479
00:21:09,001 --> 00:21:10,434
There's no question about that.
480
00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:13,037
But I'd leave out
this "maybe sometime"
481
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:15,499
"we can go bowling" part.
482
00:21:17,977 --> 00:21:19,209
Hello, Carol.
483
00:21:19,245 --> 00:21:20,377
Leonard, I want to talk to you.
484
00:21:20,413 --> 00:21:22,046
Oh, then I'll just go
in the kitchen.
485
00:21:22,081 --> 00:21:24,708
No, daddy,
i want you to hear this.
486
00:21:25,318 --> 00:21:29,653
Leonard, the past two weeks
have been beautiful, fun,
487
00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:31,121
and romantic.
488
00:21:31,157 --> 00:21:32,423
But I got caught up in something
489
00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:34,224
that wasn't really love.
490
00:21:34,260 --> 00:21:35,759
It's over, Leonard.
491
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:38,529
Carol, I wasn't expecting this.
492
00:21:38,564 --> 00:21:39,663
That's okay.
493
00:21:39,699 --> 00:21:40,898
At your age,
there's a good chance
494
00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:43,454
your mind will fuzz
this whole thing out.
495
00:21:46,870 --> 00:21:50,970
Good night, daddy.
Night, uncle Leonard.
496
00:21:51,608 --> 00:21:53,741
You okay?
497
00:21:53,777 --> 00:21:55,410
Thanks for the warning, Barbara.
498
00:21:55,445 --> 00:21:57,145
I owe you one.
499
00:21:57,180 --> 00:22:01,482
Well, at least this way
i still have my dignity
500
00:22:01,518 --> 00:22:03,284
and my self-respect.
501
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,453
And, god willing,
enough money to go out
502
00:22:05,488 --> 00:22:07,824
and buy a marble cake.
503
00:22:09,025 --> 00:22:11,826
It's funny, I came here
to break up with Carol
504
00:22:11,862 --> 00:22:12,927
and now I feel lousy.
505
00:22:12,929 --> 00:22:14,229
Len, come here. Sit down.
506
00:22:14,264 --> 00:22:15,496
Come over here with me.
507
00:22:15,532 --> 00:22:17,692
Let me talk to you
like your old friend here.
508
00:22:18,535 --> 00:22:22,885
You see, it's like two ships
passing in the night.
509
00:22:22,935 --> 00:22:27,485
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