All language subtitles for Drunk History s01e03 Atlanta.eng

Drunk History - Season 01 - Episode 03 - Atlanta

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- John Pemberton put
the coca and the kola together.

It was wine
with cocaine in it,

which was
super fucking fun.

- Martin Luther King says,
I have a dream.

J. Edgar Hoover says,
this is total communist stuff.

J. Edgar Hoover
is pretty weird.

- Stetson Kennedy
came up with this crazy scheme

to infiltrate
the Ku Klux Klan,

learn their secrets,
and expose them.

[Sneezes]

[Sneezes]
- Bless you.

- Thank you.
- [Laughs]

[Patriotic music]

?
? Ripped By mstoll

- Thank you for having
Drunk Hlstory here in Atlanta!

[All cheering]
- Atlanta! Atlanta!

- Well, you know what we love?
- What do you love?

- Do you know what we love?
We love drop it and cross it.

- What's drop it
and cross it?

- Drop it and cross it
is the A-town.

You know
you're down with it.

- We have nothing but coke.

The word for soda in Atlanta
is "coke."

- "Coke."

- And the strip clubs here

are, like,
fall-of-Rome shit, man.

- Mwah!
- [Laughs]

That was my first kiss
with a girl.

- Hello.

Today, we're going to talk

about the invention
of Coca-Cola,

America's
favorite soft drink.

[Giggles]

So, like, in the 1800s,

John Pemberton was trying
to make patent medicines.

Basically,
they were fake medicines,

and most of them were just,
like, herbal whosiwhats.

Who even cares?

He was just trying to make
anything that would sell.

He was like,
I want to make a fake medicine

that made women think
that they'll never be nervous

or have farts...

and make men think
that they can be smarter.

So he decided to use
a new ingredient, coca.

Coca is from a plant.

The South Americans
would chew it

and be like,
we had so much energy,

and we weren't even hungry,
and we hiked the whole Andes.

[Laughs]

But really, they were
just on cocaine.

John Pemberton was like,
oh, I should put this

into my new potion
that I'm making.

And basically, he copied
someone else's recipe,

called, like,
"Vin Mariani."

He was like,
well, I have wine.

I put coca in there,
a little of this kola in.

The kola nut released
a little bit of caffeine.

And he... he basically
was like,

what I give you
is wine with cocaine...

[laughs]
Caffeine.

Then people in Atlanta
were like,

no, nobody can sell alcohol
because of temperance.

He was like,
okay, well, fine,

I'll just make
a temperance beverage.

He went back
into his laboratory,

and he decided to just put
the coca and the kola together,

but they were super bitter
without the wine,

so he added
a ton of sugar,

and then, he made it into,
like, a drink.

You know, he thought,

oh, well,
people will love this.

It wasn't like he was like,
I made a soda, pbbt!

'Cause nobody
even had that yet.

He had a friend
named Frank... Robinson...

[laughs]
Who was like, okay, well,

I'll help you to sell your,
um, medicine soda drink thingy.

First of all,
you should, um,

change the K in the "kola"
to a C,

and just call it what it is,
"Coca-Cola,"

and the two Cs will look
really nice next to each other,

and who wouldn't
love that?

So they would just
advertise Coca-Cola

as a medicine
for your brain.

They would say,

it's invigorating
and stimulating

and healthy
for your nervous system.

Using the exotic extract

of the coca and kola nut...

[laughs]
To make you super alive

and ready
to face your day.

The first year...

he only sold 25 gallons.

- 25,000 or 25...
- 25 gallons...

- Okay.
- In a year.

He gave it to pharmacies.

They had, like, soda fountains
and fun things,

and people did like it,
a lot.

Oh, this is, like,
a great drink.

They thought that it made them,
like, invigorated and aware.

People are basically
drinking little cocaine soda.

[Laughs]

Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,
me, me!

I need more.

I wish I was alive then to drink
the coke... coke... Coca-Cola.

[Laughs]

- [Laughs]

- Oh!

God, I missed so much from
not being in the olden times.

[Laughs]

The next year,
he sold 200 gallons a month!

[Laughs]
That's so much more!

12 months.

[Dog barking]

[Short bark]

[Dog barking]
[Gasps]

Reggie, stop it.
[Short bark]

Twel...
[short bark]

Reggie, God damn it.

Hold on.

Okay, I got him.

12 months out of the year,
we sold 2,000 gallons a month.

No... yes?
God damn it.

He's on his deathbed
dying of stomach cancer,

and he's like, out of all
of the patent medicines

that I've tried to make,

I've finally made
a successful patent medicine.

But what he never knew
was that he actually made

the most successful drink

that humans
will ever drink ever.

God, he was so successful,
and he doesn't know,

and he'll never know ever.

They still use coca leaves

in modern-day Coca-Cola,

so do the math
on that one.

Even if they don't
have cocaine in them,

they still use the leaves,
and they took the cocaine out.

They're putting it
somewhere else.

[Laughs]

- This mysterious package
showed up.

It was like a mixtape
of every sex act

that Martin Luther King
had ever done.

- The great thing
about Atlanta is that

if you walk a mile
in one direction,

you can go see MLK's birthplace,
you can see his church,

you can see
where it all began.

If you walk a mile
in the other direction,

you can get
a moo shu pork burrito

at 4:00 A.M.
Or get stabbed.

- [Chuckles]

- This is how much is left,

and I bought it today.

Like, a human being
should be in a body bag

if this is how much
is left.

Hello.

Today, we're gonna talk

about the FBI versus
Martin Luther King, Jr.

[Dramatic music]

During the 1960s,

J. Edgar Hoover
was the head of the FBI.

He's an old man,
and he thought,

communists are gonna
take over America,

and I gotta get ready
for it.

Meanwhile,
Martin Luther King,

a non-violent
Christian minister,

gives the greatest speech
of the entire 20th century.

I have a dream that
we will live in a fair society,

where, you know, it doesn't
matter what race you are,

you can achieve
anything you believe in.

And, like,
ten other beautiful things.

And J. Edgar Hoover
sees the speech and says,

"I have a dream"?

This is total communist stuff.

It all makes
so much sense

when you think about it
like a crazy person.

J. Edgar Hoover
called a press conference,

and Hoover tells these reporters
that he's invited...

who are all women
for some reason...

Martin Luther King
is the most dishonest man

in America.

One of Hoover's underlings
is saying,

[whispering]
Maybe you shouldn't

talk shit
about Martin Luther King.

Maybe you should be nice.

And Hoover's like, fuck you,
I'm gonna tell the truth.

They meet
in J. Edgar Hoover's office.

Martin Luther King says,
hey, J. Edgar Hoover,

I love everything
you've ever done.

Maybe we could
just be better teammates

so we can achieve peace
throughout America.

After those first two minutes,
J. Edgar Hoover decided,

dude, now it's my turn.

It's my turn to say
what's on my mind.

The FBI does this.
The FBI does that.

The FBI is helping you here.
The FBI is helping you there.

And he just goes on and on
and on and on

about how awesome the FBI is.

And afterwards, one of
Martin Luther King's friends

calls him and says,

what was that like,
meeting with Martin Luther King?

[Laughs]
I'm sorry.

That's how drunk I am.
Okay.

What was it like

meeting
with J. Edgar Hoover?

And Martin Luther King was like,
dude, I'll tell you.

J. Edgar Hoover, he's just
a old man who talks too much.

He's crazy.

J. Edgar Hoover was listening
to everything that he said.

He was like,
what the fuck?

He's talking shit
about me

even though
I just talked with him?

Oh, man, it's on now.

These boss...
these guys...

these guys...

try to harass
Martin Luther King.

This FBI agent,
William Sullivan,

his entire job
is, like, mind-effing,

so he decides, like, I gotta...
I gotta write a letter.

Dear Martin Luther King,
I'm a black person,

just like you.

[Whispering]
I'm not a white guy.

I think that you
are a bad person.

You better kill yourself.

Uh, see the attachment.

The attachment
is a recording

of you having sex
with lots of people.

The end.
I'm black.

Send.

When this mysterious package
showed up,

Martin Luther King's wife,
Coretta Scott King,

listened to it.

It was, like,
a mixtape

that the FBI
had specially made...

every sex act,
every embarrassing thing

that Martin Luther King
had ever done.

And Martin Luther King's
like, this is crazy.

The FBI is trying
to destroy my life.

They try to give up...

they try to make him
give up his core beliefs.

Martin Luther King
decides,

like, I'm gonna stick
to what I believe.

I don't care
what you guys do to me.

And Martin Luther King
continues to fight

for what he believes in.

Hoover never retired
from the FBI.

He just sort of
slowed down.

I think that
he was just very upset

at anybody
who had sex.

He thought it was
a real bad idea.

He didn't like it.

I'm gonna die now.
[Laughs]

Good-bye.

Oh, man,
this is the most nauseous

I've ever been in my life.

- Can we do the handshake?
Do you want to do the handshake?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

This is... this is the handshake
of the Ku Klux Klan.

Like this.

- Then we both know
we hate...

- We both know
we hate black people.

[Cheering and chanting]

[Native American chanting]

- Why is that chant still used?
Like, how...

- Because everyone in Atlanta's
fucking racist.

- Oh.
- [Laughs]

- That whole, like,
"red skin" thing.

- That's like saying
only white people

can celebrate
St. Patrick's Day.

- Your black ass celebrates
St. Patrick's Day?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, no.

There shouldn't be any holiday

that's just, like, for one race,
right?

- Yeah, no, not at all.
- Well, yeah, Kwanzaa.

- Yeah, Kwanzaa, yeah.
- [Laughs]

- You fuckers
cannot celebrate Kwanzaa.

- Hello!

[Laughs]

Hello.

Today, we're gonna
talk about the KKK

and the guy who
took them down, Superman.

Stetson Kennedy,
he's just a regular Southern guy

who's working
as a door-to-door salesman

in Georgia,
and he thinks to himself,

how can one guy
make a difference?

Stetson Kennedy
made the decision,

I am going to infiltrate
the Ku Klux Klan,

learn their secrets,
and expose them.

So he goes to a bar that he knew
was populated with Klansmen,

and this guy walks up to him,
and he says, hey, how you doing?

I'm Slim.

And Stetson Kennedy...
he's playing coy at this time...

he's like, oh, hi.

You know, they chat at the bar,
and then eventually,

it comes around
to talk of the KKK,

and Slim says,
well, you know,

I'm a member
of the Ku Klux Klan.

And Stetson's like,
oh, really?

And the guy says, yeah.

If you're like-minded,

then we might have a place
for you in our organization.

And so Stetson Kennedy's
like, all right,

I'm gonna go do this.

They pick him up
one night,

they drag him out to
his final swearing-in ceremony.

So the Klan was all like...
the Klan's all like,

ooh, this is all super secret,
and if you do this,

then you hold your hand up
like this,

and then you put your hand
over your heart,

and then you hold
your hand out like this,

and then you wave twice,
and then you say,

"I believe in the tenets
of the Klan."

He becomes a full-fledged member
of the Klan.

Stetson Kennedy discovered
the childish, dumb shit

that these guys would do.

They were dumb secrets,

like, we're meeting
at the Klavern at midnight.

It was secrets that little kids
would have if they had a fort.

It was like, no girls allowed
in the "Klan-klave."

Like, the "Klan-klave"?

This is the "Klan-klave,"
and...

Can we do the handshake?
Do you want to do the handshake?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

This is... this is the handshake
of the Ku Klux Klan.

It's a left-handed,
limp-wristed...

- Limp, okay.
- Limp-wristed, like this.

- Then we both know
we hate...

- We both know
we hate black people.

So...

I'm gonna lay on the floor,

but I'm gonna be focused,
I promise.

Can you hear me?
- Mm-hmm.

- Do you mind
if I lay right here?

Stetson Kennedy, he's walking
down the street one day

and sees a couple of kids
playing spy, and he thinks,

oh, my god,
these spy games

that these little kids
are playing

look remarkably similar
to the way that the Ku Klux Klan

actually deals with life
and the world around them.

Stetson Kennedy found

the people that were in charge
of the Superman radio show,

and he said, I know the secrets

of the Ku Klux Klan.

What do you guys think
about a series of episodes

where Superman
takes down the Klan?

I'm your guy.

And the people
at Superman said...

sure.

Careful, Jimmy,
don't touch that fiery cross.

Ah, shucks, Mr. Kent,
whatever you say.

I don't fucking know.
- [Laughs]

- How 'bout a little bit
of fruit, Mark?

- Uh-huh.

- Hey, this is...
this is cantaloupe.

You want to put that
in your mouth?

- Uh-huh.
- Or...

- What did I just
put in my mouth?

- That was cantaloupe.
- I like cantaloupe.

- Okay.
This is pineapple.

Do you like pineapple?

- I like pineapple.

For ten episodes
of the Superman radio show,

Superman fought the KKK.

Up in the sky,
it's a bird, it's a plane.

No, it's Superman!

Superman,
battling valiantly

against the Clan
of the Fiery Cross.

Jimmy Olsen, protected
by the power of Superman

and his mighty might.

I don't fucking know.
- [Laughs]

- Careful, Jimmy,
don't touch that fiery cross.

Ah, shucks, Mr. Kent,
whatever you say.

There was no YouTube,
there was no podcasts.

Everybody
listened to the radio.

As this was happening,

Stetson Kennedy
would call them and say,

here are the new passwords that
the KKK are using this week.

The codeword was "Anglo."

The password
was "American."

The next week
on the Superman show,

Superman would show up
and say, "Anglo."

And one of the bad guys
would respond with, "American."

The kids of the Klansmen
were playing Superman

against the KKK.

Following the broadcast
of the Superman episodes,

one of the heads of the Klavern
said to the leader,

sir, I cannot,
in good conscience,

continue as a member
of this Klavern

when my own children
are poking fun

at the Clan
of the Fiery Cross.

[Sneezes]

[Coughs]

[Sneezes]

- Bless you.
- Thank you.

[Sneezes]

[Sneezes]

When Stetson Kennedy had taken
the secrets of the KKK

and made them
public knowledge...

[sneezes]

- Bless you.
- Thank you.

[Begins to sneeze]

[Blows air]

[Sneezes]

- Bless you.
- Thank you.

- [Laughs]

- Thanks to Stetson Kennedy,
the Klan was defeated.

And, in so many words,

fucking stupid.

- [Laughs]

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- 12 months.

[Dog barking]

[Short barks]

[Laughter]

- I can't... I'm so sorry.
Let's go again.

I can't look at him.
I just can't look at him.

I'm sorry.
[Laughter] Ripped By mstoll

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