Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,537 --> 00:00:05,697
Miss Lemon.
2
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:08,637
It's me, Kenneth Parcell, the page.
3
00:00:09,709 --> 00:00:11,678
You probably didn't recognize me
in this new page uniform.
4
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:12,679
I recognize you, Kenneth.
5
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:16,282
The old uniforms were timeless, practical, sexy.
6
00:00:16,282 --> 00:00:17,751
But this?
7
00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:19,352
This is an outrage.
8
00:00:19,352 --> 00:00:21,217
You need to make them
go back to the old uniform.
9
00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:22,515
Well, I don't have that kind of authority.
10
00:00:22,589 --> 00:00:23,715
Then what do you do?!
11
00:00:26,926 --> 00:00:27,927
Hey!
12
00:00:27,927 --> 00:00:29,451
I just got a call from security.
13
00:00:29,829 --> 00:00:32,821
That's ridiculous. Why would I
steal a file from personnel?
14
00:00:32,999 --> 00:00:34,401
What?
15
00:00:34,401 --> 00:00:35,959
No, Claire is in the lobby.
16
00:00:36,136 --> 00:00:37,967
Claire Harper? From Chicago?
17
00:00:38,071 --> 00:00:39,902
Yup. Fun, crazy Claire.
18
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:43,543
Oh, man! Do you remember that night
we all danced in the open fire hydrant?
19
00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:44,644
Yeah! Her roof parties?
20
00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:45,975
Karaoke in Boystown?
21
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,638
The all-night scavenger hunts?
22
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:49,646
Do you remember when we
crashed that Polish wedding?
23
00:00:50,950 --> 00:00:52,042
Yeah, she's exhausting.
24
00:00:52,185 --> 00:00:54,983
Ugh, I know. She's gonna make us
buy more of her homemade jewelry.
25
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,647
Birds always attack me when I wear it.
26
00:00:57,290 --> 00:00:59,793
I am not letting her drag me
out to some club tonight.
27
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:01,090
I am too old for that.
28
00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:02,395
Up or down, ladies?
29
00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:04,386
Neither, we're waiting
for our old roommate.
30
00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:05,999
She's like a human "Macarena":
31
00:01:05,999 --> 00:01:08,568
something everyone did at parties in 1996.
32
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:09,636
Mee-ow.
33
00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:10,703
You're right, that was harsh.
34
00:01:10,703 --> 00:01:11,704
No, "Mi Au."
35
00:01:11,704 --> 00:01:14,307
She owns the largest alternative
energy company in Asia.
36
00:01:14,307 --> 00:01:16,176
So as part of our Green Initiative,
37
00:01:16,176 --> 00:01:18,678
we're doing a reality show
about her quest for a boyfriend.
38
00:01:18,678 --> 00:01:19,702
Wow.
39
00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:22,810
Here comes Claire.
I'm already tired.
40
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:26,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
41
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:32,992
Surprise! I'm designing hats now!
42
00:01:32,992 --> 00:01:33,959
Oh, hats!
43
00:01:34,594 --> 00:01:36,186
Oh, Claire, this is my boss, Jack Donaghy.
44
00:01:36,729 --> 00:01:37,696
Hi, there.
45
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,356
Welcome to New York, let's see...
46
00:01:39,432 --> 00:01:41,167
We're using credit cards in cabs now.
47
00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:43,036
All the galleries have moved to Chelsea.
48
00:01:43,036 --> 00:01:44,697
And we're off cupcakes and back to donuts.
49
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,204
Would you excuse me
for a moment, please?
50
00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:49,770
So girls, what are we doing tonight?
51
00:01:49,976 --> 00:01:52,445
You know, the baggage handler
told me about this storage unit party
52
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:53,713
that's on the Lower East Side.
53
00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:54,714
Starts about midnight.
54
00:01:54,714 --> 00:01:57,706
It's sponsored by Myirt Vodka
and some drug dealer.
55
00:01:58,017 --> 00:02:00,487
But the only rule is that we all have to DJ!
56
00:02:00,487 --> 00:02:02,546
I mean, it's gonna be so much fun!
57
00:02:32,418 --> 00:02:34,318
What's wrong, Ken?
You've got "wife eyes".
58
00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:35,951
I'm just sad, sir.
59
00:02:36,356 --> 00:02:39,359
I've worn this old jacket
since nineteen --
60
00:02:39,359 --> 00:02:40,827
And now they're just throwing it away.
61
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,556
Is there nothing sacred?
62
00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,560
Have we lost our moral center?
63
00:02:44,797 --> 00:02:46,458
It just makes me want to pee on someone.
64
00:02:46,599 --> 00:02:48,567
And I appreciate that, sir.
65
00:02:48,701 --> 00:02:50,669
But rules are rules.
I'm just gonna have to live with it.
66
00:02:50,937 --> 00:02:52,705
I hate to see you like this, Ken Doll.
67
00:02:52,705 --> 00:02:55,435
It's like an owl without a graduation cap.
68
00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:56,566
Heartbreaking!
69
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,611
So what can I buy you to make you happy?
70
00:02:58,611 --> 00:03:01,603
The things I want don't have a price tag, sir.
71
00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:05,545
Money can't buy a sunset.
Or a child's smile.
72
00:03:05,618 --> 00:03:09,956
Or a satisfying finale
to the hit NBC series "Night Court".
73
00:03:09,956 --> 00:03:12,058
Court? At night?
74
00:03:12,058 --> 00:03:14,549
I'm already laughing!
Tell me more.
75
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:17,931
Well, "Night Court" was supposed
to end with a wedding
76
00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:19,728
between Christine and Harry.
77
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,568
But the show didn't get a 10th season
78
00:03:21,568 --> 00:03:23,866
so that great love story was left untold.
79
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:26,766
So you never got closure
with those beloved characters?
80
00:03:30,977 --> 00:03:34,276
Did you see our shout-out in Variety?
They called us a comedy show!
81
00:03:34,614 --> 00:03:36,883
Lemon, I ran into your friend
Claire in the elevator.
82
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:38,976
She is very pretty.
83
00:03:39,085 --> 00:03:41,553
No, no, no. She is nuts
when it comes to guys.
84
00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:43,656
We had a name for her in Chicago...
85
00:03:43,656 --> 00:03:44,657
It's...
86
00:03:44,657 --> 00:03:46,352
too rude to say out loud.
87
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,030
"Crazyputty"?
88
00:03:51,497 --> 00:03:52,464
No.
89
00:03:52,832 --> 00:03:55,301
She's psycho.
She is Fatal Attraction.
90
00:03:55,301 --> 00:03:58,327
She is staunchly in favor of Cocoa Puffs.
91
00:03:58,438 --> 00:03:59,735
Do not sleep with her.
92
00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:01,737
I wish you had told me that an hour ago.
93
00:04:01,874 --> 00:04:02,841
What?
94
00:04:03,876 --> 00:04:05,275
Oh, hey, Liz.
95
00:04:05,545 --> 00:04:06,569
Jack was just...
96
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:09,406
giving me directions to the F train.
97
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:12,252
So are we still on for tonight?
98
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,186
Because it is going to be epic.
99
00:04:14,554 --> 00:04:15,714
I can't, I...
100
00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:17,957
volunteer at a thing with...
101
00:04:18,191 --> 00:04:19,624
kids and old people.
102
00:04:20,159 --> 00:04:21,160
Bring 'em!
103
00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:22,559
See ya!
104
00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:28,031
What were you thinking? Some woman you've
known for 10 seconds in the elevator?
105
00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:31,398
I don't see what the problem is.
This is objectively awesome.
106
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:34,841
You don't understand. For her,
sex isn't something you have to do
107
00:04:34,841 --> 00:04:36,240
after the 1 2th date.
108
00:04:36,576 --> 00:04:39,602
She uses it to suck men in
and bleed them dry.
109
00:04:39,712 --> 00:04:42,943
Back in Chicago, I saw her take
powerful men down.
110
00:04:43,182 --> 00:04:46,719
Didn't matter if it was Scottie Pippen,
or the drummer for the BoDeans
111
00:04:46,719 --> 00:04:50,857
...or someone else's boyfriend who ran
a small but prestigious clowning academy.
112
00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:52,225
Whose boyfriend?
113
00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:55,717
Uh-huh, I get it. The fun, pretty girl
who got the guys, some of them yours.
114
00:04:55,862 --> 00:04:58,831
No, listen to me, she's not "fun."
She's just crazy.
115
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:01,365
Like, grab a cop's gun crazy.
116
00:05:01,434 --> 00:05:04,737
Lemon, having known Claire for
a very enjoyable 20 minutes,
117
00:05:04,737 --> 00:05:08,195
and you for what feels like infinity,
I'm gonna go with Claire on this one.
118
00:05:12,078 --> 00:05:13,511
Ready for your big surprise?
119
00:05:13,746 --> 00:05:14,947
Yes, sir.
120
00:05:14,947 --> 00:05:16,883
Gosh, the last time I was blindfolded
121
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,852
was when I had to play the piano
at that weird masquerade party.
122
00:05:21,287 --> 00:05:22,254
Ta-da!
123
00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:25,523
Some of the cast of Night Court!
124
00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:28,150
That's right, K.
And they're here for you.
125
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:30,524
This is the sick kid
you were telling us about?
126
00:05:30,663 --> 00:05:33,393
Oh, bless your heart.
Do you like racecars?
127
00:05:33,566 --> 00:05:34,533
I do!
128
00:05:35,968 --> 00:05:39,734
Thank you, Mr. Jordan!
This is the greatest day of my life!
129
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,941
First I find that quarter this morning --
130
00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:44,774
Uh, I lost a quarter. Earlier.
131
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,284
Everyone-- To Mi Au.
132
00:05:56,356 --> 00:06:00,793
May tonight's fundraiser for your
Fundraising Foundation be as successful
133
00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:04,864
as last week's cocktail reception
for your rehab center.
134
00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:08,201
Jack's just being modest.
135
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:09,725
He won't tell you...
136
00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:11,603
But I will!
137
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:16,674
Today is Jack's birthday.
138
00:06:17,643 --> 00:06:18,610
Hit it, boys!
139
00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:23,416
# Happy Birthday...?
140
00:06:23,416 --> 00:06:25,611
# to you...?
141
00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:28,554
# Happy birthday...?
142
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,351
# to you...?
143
00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:33,092
# Happy birth-?
144
00:06:33,092 --> 00:06:34,093
# -day...?
145
00:06:34,093 --> 00:06:35,094
# dear...?
146
00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:37,153
# Jackie Bear...?
147
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:40,967
# Happy birthday...?
148
00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:44,470
# to him?
149
00:06:50,176 --> 00:06:54,772
Jack, introduce me to this
charming, young woman.
150
00:06:54,947 --> 00:06:57,541
I am his life coach,
Esmeralda Fitzmonster --
151
00:06:57,683 --> 00:06:59,548
Would you excuse us,
just for a moment please?
152
00:06:59,952 --> 00:07:01,120
How did you get in here?
153
00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:03,256
And first of all, it's not my birthday --
154
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,245
I know. Isn't that funny?
155
00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:07,684
What? Oh, come on, are you mad?
156
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,584
I'm just being fun and spontaneous.
157
00:07:09,729 --> 00:07:11,856
This is highly inappropriate.
I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
158
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:14,524
Hey! If I kill myself it is all your fault!
159
00:07:25,545 --> 00:07:26,705
You were right about Claire.
160
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,282
She crashed Mi Au's party.
161
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:32,547
Uh-huh. Did she do "Sexy birthday"
or "Mannequin who comes to life"?
162
00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:34,580
"Sexy birthday", thank God!
163
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:36,645
This is bad.
I need your help.
164
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:39,025
When we were having sex at the
Palace, she said she loved me.
165
00:07:39,025 --> 00:07:39,992
You did it again?
166
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:42,027
Well, it was quick and in the meat locker.
That's okay, right?
167
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:45,928
What is it with you men? You're like junkies.
Why can't you just say no?
168
00:07:46,065 --> 00:07:48,634
Lemon, let me explain something
you could have no way of knowing.
169
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:51,904
Emotionally unstable women are...
170
00:07:51,904 --> 00:07:55,575
fantastic in the sack.
I mean their self-loathing...
171
00:07:55,575 --> 00:07:57,566
translates into...
172
00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:00,003
Nevermind.
173
00:08:00,279 --> 00:08:03,082
I've got to get out of this.
What do other guys do?
174
00:08:03,082 --> 00:08:04,242
Well, one guy died.
175
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,519
Scottie Pippen requested a trade to Houston.
176
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:08,510
Houston's too humid.
What about this "died" thing?
177
00:08:08,588 --> 00:08:10,317
Ugh...
Where is she now?
178
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:12,357
Chained to the radiator in her hotel room.
179
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:15,223
It was her idea.
She's an amazing woman, Lemon.
180
00:08:15,394 --> 00:08:17,897
OK, I need to keep you two separated.
181
00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:19,232
I can't believe I'm gonna say this:
182
00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:21,723
I will go clubbing with Claire.
183
00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:23,302
I will attempt a hair-do.
184
00:08:23,302 --> 00:08:25,202
I will wear high heels.
185
00:08:25,304 --> 00:08:26,794
Claire's wearing high heels right now.
186
00:08:26,973 --> 00:08:29,408
Go home, junkie.
I'm cutting off your supply.
187
00:08:29,408 --> 00:08:32,536
She leaves Thursday. Do you think
you can make it through one night?
188
00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:35,280
I just gotta hack it...
I just gotta hack it...
189
00:08:36,749 --> 00:08:39,285
My boy Ken has written a masterpiece.
190
00:08:39,285 --> 00:08:41,810
And trust me, I use that word a lot.
191
00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:46,292
I just want to thank y'all
for making this dream come true for me.
192
00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:49,728
Finally giving America what it wants.
193
00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:54,066
A reunion of friends... from "Night Court".
194
00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:56,569
And the wedding of Harry and Christine!
195
00:08:56,569 --> 00:08:58,104
Before we begin...
196
00:08:58,104 --> 00:09:00,766
I would just like to say how special it is
197
00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:04,674
to be with you all again, my very special family.
198
00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:08,245
I just wish the brilliant
John Larroquette could be here as well.
199
00:09:08,314 --> 00:09:11,681
Yeah, he really did want to come,
but he couldn't work the schedule out.
200
00:09:12,084 --> 00:09:13,319
You and John still talk?
201
00:09:13,319 --> 00:09:14,513
We stay in touch, yeah.
202
00:09:14,987 --> 00:09:16,122
Did he mention me?
203
00:09:16,122 --> 00:09:17,557
You came up, Markie.
204
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:19,191
You always come up, Markie!
205
00:09:19,191 --> 00:09:22,562
Well, of course I come up
at your little boys' club.
206
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:26,020
You always thought you were better than me
because you got nominated for Emmys.
207
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:30,258
Well, I would have too, but I was
too hot to be taken seriously!
208
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,894
Well, that wouldn't be a problem now, would it?
209
00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:38,907
Mmm-hmmm.
210
00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:40,978
Court is adjourned.
211
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:48,208
This is worse than the original finale!
What are we gonna do?
212
00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,912
I don't know, Ken.
This is bad.
213
00:09:50,990 --> 00:09:52,825
I wish this were an episode of Night Court
214
00:09:52,825 --> 00:09:55,055
'cause then there'd be
some big joke right now.
215
00:10:03,402 --> 00:10:05,165
Oh, that is so hot!
216
00:10:05,504 --> 00:10:06,766
You just look good in everything.
217
00:10:06,973 --> 00:10:09,208
I want to buy some hats.
218
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:10,476
Yes!
219
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:11,978
Hey! You're selling hats in the office!
220
00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:14,412
I am. And I didn't ask
because I knew you'd say yes.
221
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,081
So...
222
00:10:16,215 --> 00:10:18,581
What's the haps?
What are we doing tonight?
223
00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:20,479
Hitting a clizz-ub with Jenna?
224
00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:23,551
You know I'd love to, but
I kinda have tentative plans.
225
00:10:23,723 --> 00:10:26,590
What, with Jack? Come on.
He's like the first guy you met here.
226
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:30,563
Roll with us tonight and you will
meet someone even hotter.
227
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:31,564
Really?
228
00:10:31,564 --> 00:10:35,134
Guaranteed. Like I was at this
club last week called...
229
00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:36,135
...Chili's
230
00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:39,400
And I met this smoking guy.
231
00:10:40,072 --> 00:10:41,562
He was just raw.
232
00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:44,543
Tell me everything.
233
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,636
I'm going to.
He was wearing this shirt.
234
00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:49,872
And I could totally see his nips.
235
00:10:50,783 --> 00:10:52,218
And he was very muscular.
236
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:53,285
Really!
237
00:10:53,285 --> 00:10:54,387
Did you go home with him?
238
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:56,322
Yes. To his loft.
239
00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:58,415
Where he gave me the business.
240
00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:01,519
So let's go dancing in high heels!
241
00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:04,189
OK, I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna blow off Jack.
242
00:11:04,263 --> 00:11:05,230
Where should we go?
243
00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:07,400
You guys should go to Aquarium.
244
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:11,804
It's this new night club, and all the women
are in a glass room on the dance floor
245
00:11:11,804 --> 00:11:14,830
and all the guys just watch and feed them.
246
00:11:15,875 --> 00:11:17,342
That sounds so hot!
247
00:11:17,576 --> 00:11:19,203
Yes, thank you, Cerie.
That's very helpful.
248
00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:20,642
Thank you. So helpful.
249
00:11:21,914 --> 00:11:24,283
You have to go through with this wedding, Harry.
250
00:11:24,283 --> 00:11:25,978
It means the world to my boy Ken.
251
00:11:26,118 --> 00:11:28,254
Hey, I am game.
But it's Markie.
252
00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,653
She will not let go of the past.
253
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:30,889
Okay.
254
00:11:31,057 --> 00:11:34,185
So you and Markeline have bad blood.
But it's bigger than that.
255
00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:37,020
My boy Kenneth is going through
some really tough times.
256
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:38,898
They're trying to make him wear a coat
257
00:11:38,898 --> 00:11:40,798
that's different than his other coat.
258
00:11:45,805 --> 00:11:48,330
You won't regret this, Harry.
You look great.
259
00:11:51,610 --> 00:11:55,247
Markie, will you do me the honor
of becoming my fake wife
260
00:11:55,247 --> 00:11:57,579
so we can get our money
and get the hell out of here?
261
00:11:58,017 --> 00:12:01,043
I've waited 15 years
to hear you say those words.
262
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:04,385
It's happening!
Nothing can go wrong now.
263
00:12:15,768 --> 00:12:16,826
There you are.
264
00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,204
Why'd you leave?
265
00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:20,604
I think those Persian guys wanted
us to make out together.
266
00:12:20,873 --> 00:12:23,676
I'm waiting for Claire.
She texted me like an hour ago
267
00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:26,008
and said that she was
getting on the F train --
268
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:28,547
Oh, no.
269
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:30,549
What? What is it?
270
00:12:36,222 --> 00:12:37,223
Lemon?
271
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:38,986
Jack! She's in your house.
272
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:42,128
Don't be ridiculous.
273
00:12:42,128 --> 00:12:43,390
The alarm is--
274
00:12:44,730 --> 00:12:47,722
I made you a white pizza and a pot roast
275
00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:51,027
because I just think you're so amazing...
276
00:12:51,804 --> 00:12:53,205
Look at me, playing house!
277
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:56,368
My God, you must think
I'm out of my mind!
278
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:57,610
Do you?
279
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,669
You just looked away when
I said that! I saw you!
280
00:12:59,745 --> 00:13:00,712
No.
281
00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:05,578
Just kiss me. I know
your lips will be honest.
282
00:13:09,321 --> 00:13:10,288
Lemon, I gotta call you back.
283
00:13:14,426 --> 00:13:17,329
Now, when we left off, Christine
was stuck in the elevator,
284
00:13:17,329 --> 00:13:19,465
Mac had two dates on the same night,
285
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,797
and Harry just discovered he was adopted.
286
00:13:21,867 --> 00:13:22,959
So let's turn to page two.
287
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:26,033
Well, well, well
a Night Court reunion.
288
00:13:26,238 --> 00:13:30,109
Funny how I wasn't invited.
Or had you forgotten my three-episode arc
289
00:13:30,109 --> 00:13:31,736
as Public Defender
Sparky Monroe?
290
00:13:31,911 --> 00:13:35,403
No, we remember, Jenna.
You were the werewolf lawyer.
291
00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:41,684
I can prove my client is innocent.
If only it weren't a full "mooon"!
292
00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:43,789
You made us jump the shark!
293
00:13:43,789 --> 00:13:45,658
You're the reason we didn't have a 10th season.
294
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:48,752
I had just bought my second home
when they brought that idiot werewolf lawyer in.
295
00:13:48,861 --> 00:13:52,160
Uh, that "idiot werewolf" paid for
my hand reduction surgery, Okay?
296
00:13:52,598 --> 00:13:54,667
Kenneth, I can't believe you're
such a Night Court fan
297
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,328
and didn't know I played the werelawyer.
298
00:13:57,136 --> 00:13:58,103
I knew.
299
00:13:58,737 --> 00:13:59,965
Very well.
300
00:14:00,406 --> 00:14:01,373
I can take a hint.
301
00:14:03,309 --> 00:14:06,142
But you haven't seen the last
of Sparky Monroe!
302
00:14:11,884 --> 00:14:12,851
Liz, help me.
303
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:14,979
Jack, what happened last night?
304
00:14:15,321 --> 00:14:16,555
Why are you wearing that hat?
305
00:14:16,555 --> 00:14:17,690
I don't know.
306
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,225
You did it again?
307
00:14:19,225 --> 00:14:20,249
I can't help it.
308
00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:22,795
I'm under a lot of pressure,
and Claire is my escape.
309
00:14:22,795 --> 00:14:25,923
I crave her all the time
even though I know she's bad for me.
310
00:14:26,565 --> 00:14:27,998
And my teeth are getting loose!
311
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:29,668
I don't think I can get out of this.
312
00:14:29,668 --> 00:14:30,657
Maybe Claire's right.
313
00:14:31,103 --> 00:14:32,900
Maybe if we had a baby together
things would calm down.
314
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:34,370
Jack, this is what she does.
315
00:14:34,573 --> 00:14:37,337
She sucks you into her craziness,
and you have to fight it.
316
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:39,911
You have to step up and end this.
317
00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:41,172
I'm scared, Lemon.
318
00:14:41,947 --> 00:14:42,971
I'll do whatever you say.
319
00:14:43,115 --> 00:14:44,082
Okay.
320
00:14:45,084 --> 00:14:46,881
Oh, what a surprise.
321
00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:49,350
What are you two chatting about?
322
00:14:49,455 --> 00:14:51,590
Actually, Claire, we were
talking about you.
323
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:53,319
And Jack has something
he'd like to tell you.
324
00:14:54,159 --> 00:14:55,126
I do.
325
00:14:55,961 --> 00:14:58,088
I'd like to suck that ring
right off your toe.
326
00:14:58,364 --> 00:14:59,331
...just gotta hack it...
327
00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:02,490
Oh please, stop. Don't make that
angry Muppet face at him.
328
00:15:03,535 --> 00:15:06,138
I know what you were trying to do last night.
329
00:15:06,138 --> 00:15:08,240
You were trying to keep me away from Jack.
330
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,675
And you almost fooled me.
331
00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:11,877
But then I remembered something.
332
00:15:11,877 --> 00:15:13,012
You don't like to have fun.
333
00:15:13,012 --> 00:15:14,980
And now your little plan is backfiring.
334
00:15:15,147 --> 00:15:17,138
And Jack is seeing
the manipulative you.
335
00:15:17,549 --> 00:15:19,915
The Single White Female
thing that you have with me.
336
00:15:20,019 --> 00:15:22,817
I don't have a Single White Female
thing with you!
337
00:15:23,055 --> 00:15:26,047
Honey, you moved into my building.
338
00:15:26,458 --> 00:15:28,756
You always wore chokers
because I wore chokers.
339
00:15:28,827 --> 00:15:30,226
- I like a choker...
- Yes...
340
00:15:30,462 --> 00:15:31,827
You dated that clown.
341
00:15:31,997 --> 00:15:32,964
Joel Sucheki.
342
00:15:33,165 --> 00:15:35,200
First! I dated him first, Claire.
343
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:38,837
And he was not "that clown" he was
"the" head clowning instructor.
344
00:15:38,837 --> 00:15:39,872
Hmm.
345
00:15:39,872 --> 00:15:41,473
I'm not doing this.
346
00:15:41,473 --> 00:15:44,931
I am only here because Jack is my friend,
and he asked me for support.
347
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,101
Yes, right. That's what I'm saying.
348
00:15:47,713 --> 00:15:49,782
We all want what's best for Jack, right?
349
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:51,750
So why don't we just
get this three-way on?
350
00:15:51,917 --> 00:15:52,884
- No!
- No!...
351
00:15:53,585 --> 00:15:55,143
...right? That's a bad idea, right?
352
00:15:55,821 --> 00:15:58,187
Well, I tried to be the adult.
353
00:15:58,357 --> 00:16:02,225
And if only one of us can
have him, it's gonna be me.
354
00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:04,023
Jack, you wanted out of this.
355
00:16:04,196 --> 00:16:07,359
Break the cycle! You have a choice.
You can choose Claire, or --
356
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:09,333
Claire, I would like Claire.
357
00:16:09,401 --> 00:16:10,836
Fine, I am done helping you.
358
00:16:10,836 --> 00:16:13,172
And when you hit rock bottom, which you will,
359
00:16:13,172 --> 00:16:14,867
I am not gonna bail you out.
360
00:16:15,007 --> 00:16:16,872
I'm deleting you from my phone!
361
00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:18,874
Password? What?
362
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,049
Hey, Tracy and Kenneth won't
put me in the "Night Court" finale
363
00:16:24,049 --> 00:16:25,317
they're shooting on stage tonight.
364
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,385
What?
365
00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:27,852
I know!
I'm the werelawyer.
366
00:16:32,624 --> 00:16:33,591
Objection!
367
00:16:33,892 --> 00:16:34,859
Here we go again...
368
00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:36,027
Tell me about it.
369
00:16:36,628 --> 00:16:38,797
The last time I saw either of you,
370
00:16:38,797 --> 00:16:41,129
there was a problem with the page uniforms.
371
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,268
A problem that persists, Liz Lemon.
372
00:16:43,569 --> 00:16:44,593
Hey, are you with network?
373
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:46,572
How about if Heroes had this new character,
374
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:48,870
and his super power was close-up magic?
375
00:16:49,141 --> 00:16:51,666
What? No. Big fan, by the way.
376
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:55,838
You are breaking union rules,
our insurance doesn't cover any of this,
377
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:59,785
and you are potentially infringing on
Warner Brothers' intellectual property.
378
00:16:59,785 --> 00:17:00,911
Shut this down.
379
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,488
I want a different answer.
Where's Jack Donaghy?
380
00:17:03,589 --> 00:17:05,284
No. There's no more Jack.
He's dead to us.
381
00:17:05,591 --> 00:17:06,649
Break this down!
382
00:17:06,892 --> 00:17:08,193
Everybody out!
383
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:09,194
I'm sorry.
384
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,195
Can I say something?
385
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:11,230
Absolutely not.
386
00:17:11,230 --> 00:17:15,724
The only crime any of us is guilty of
is caring for one another.
387
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,294
Mr. Jordan, who tried to cheer me up.
388
00:17:18,737 --> 00:17:20,739
These wonderful actors
389
00:17:20,739 --> 00:17:23,264
who tried to make a
young man's dream come true.
390
00:17:23,675 --> 00:17:25,905
If there is a law against friendship,
391
00:17:26,311 --> 00:17:27,801
then lock me up.
392
00:17:28,380 --> 00:17:30,449
But if there isn't,
393
00:17:30,449 --> 00:17:32,785
then the show must go onward!
394
00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:33,819
What?
395
00:17:33,819 --> 00:17:36,788
Ken, you did it!
You changed her mind!
396
00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:39,021
No. No he didn't!
397
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,391
Stop group hugging!
Who does that?
398
00:17:46,031 --> 00:17:46,998
Isn't this great?
399
00:17:47,966 --> 00:17:49,024
We're together.
400
00:17:49,668 --> 00:17:50,999
We're in line to get into a club.
401
00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:52,537
I have my glowstick...
402
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:55,270
Uh-huh, yeah.
403
00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:58,198
There's no more Liz
trying to keep us apart.
404
00:17:58,377 --> 00:17:59,605
No more drama.
405
00:18:00,779 --> 00:18:02,514
No more sneaking around,
406
00:18:02,514 --> 00:18:05,984
or recording our intimate moments
to leave on Liz's voicemail.
407
00:18:05,984 --> 00:18:07,052
What?
408
00:18:07,052 --> 00:18:09,521
I don't even know what
this is anymore.
409
00:18:09,521 --> 00:18:13,092
Are we boring? Are we some
sexless couple that sits in silence
410
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:16,528
at a fish place on a
Sunday night at 5:00?
411
00:18:16,528 --> 00:18:17,930
Because if we are,
I will kill myself.
412
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,728
What? No! We're exciting.
We're having fun.
413
00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:21,833
Yeah?
414
00:18:22,534 --> 00:18:23,967
You really want to have fun, Jack?
415
00:18:24,036 --> 00:18:25,437
Yes! Let's do something wild.
416
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:27,064
You like it when I get naughty, Jack?
417
00:18:27,239 --> 00:18:28,206
Yeah...
418
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,068
Where the hell did you --?
419
00:18:34,379 --> 00:18:35,414
Crazyputty!
420
00:18:35,414 --> 00:18:38,117
Hey! The guy in the
cool, cool hat has a gun!
421
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,243
Drop it! Now!
422
00:18:39,318 --> 00:18:40,285
- He has a gun!
- No, no, no, no!
423
00:18:41,386 --> 00:18:42,353
Run, Jack!
424
00:18:42,454 --> 00:18:43,421
She's crazyputty!
425
00:18:43,622 --> 00:18:44,589
Run, Jack!
426
00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:53,230
Well, it's been quite a night.
427
00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:55,856
And it's been quite a court... ship.
428
00:18:57,202 --> 00:18:59,771
So by the power vested in me
by the State of New York,
429
00:18:59,771 --> 00:19:02,035
I hereby pronounce us
430
00:19:02,174 --> 00:19:05,043
Mr. and Mrs. Judge Harry T. Stone.
431
00:19:05,043 --> 00:19:06,772
And I may now kiss the bride.
432
00:19:07,913 --> 00:19:08,981
Uh-oh...
433
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:12,610
It's almost a full "mooon"!
434
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:14,186
Yeah...
435
00:19:14,186 --> 00:19:17,849
And as my first official act
as a newly married judge,
436
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:22,757
I hereby declare the new
page uniforms at NBC illegal!
437
00:19:23,729 --> 00:19:25,998
I added that.
I went upstairs and told them,
438
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:28,200
if they didn't go back
to the old uniforms
439
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,169
I refuse to play the role of Mac
440
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,831
in Universal's upcoming
Night Court movie.
441
00:19:33,038 --> 00:19:34,005
What's that now?
442
00:19:34,273 --> 00:19:35,934
Thank you, Mr. Jordan!
443
00:19:42,748 --> 00:19:43,715
Are you okay?
444
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:46,818
I thank you very much.
445
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:49,354
Lemon...
446
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:51,845
Real night court is not like the TV show.
447
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:53,025
Remember that TV show?
448
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:53,992
I do.
449
00:19:54,059 --> 00:19:55,460
I mean, the hookers are not funny.
450
00:19:55,460 --> 00:19:58,861
There's a lot more sickly homeless people
and terrified college students...
451
00:20:00,799 --> 00:20:04,997
Thanks for bailing me out. Claire
threw my wallet down a storm drain.
452
00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:06,237
Ah.
453
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:08,138
Lemon, I'm sorry I...
454
00:20:08,473 --> 00:20:10,498
I'm just glad you're okay.
455
00:20:10,609 --> 00:20:12,167
Well, thank you for answering your phone.
456
00:20:12,244 --> 00:20:13,905
Well, I don't know
how to decline a call.
457
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:18,774
Claire used to punch me in the face.
458
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:19,940
Ugh...
459
00:20:20,819 --> 00:20:22,650
No, Lemon, I'm done. I swear.
460
00:20:22,788 --> 00:20:23,755
Hey, try this on.
461
00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:25,682
That's a good look for you.
462
00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:27,891
You like that? It's yours.
463
00:20:28,093 --> 00:20:30,493
Little Lewis Carrol here.
464
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:34,089
Best watched using Open Subtitles MKV Player
465
00:20:34,139 --> 00:20:38,689
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
34490
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof