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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:23,292 --> 00:00:26,042 Most obscene body I've ever seen in my entire life. 2 00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:30,750 I'd like to jump out of this car right now and bite your ass. 3 00:00:31,042 --> 00:00:33,625 Halt. That's a moving violation. 4 00:01:07,875 --> 00:01:09,500 Caught in the act. 5 00:01:10,708 --> 00:01:12,208 Take me alive. 6 00:01:16,333 --> 00:01:18,000 How should I plead? 7 00:01:49,167 --> 00:01:52,750 Another day, and the morning cruise. 8 00:01:53,042 --> 00:01:56,667 This is a small town. A peaceful town and I like that. 9 00:01:57,542 --> 00:01:59,500 Nothin' on the radio. 10 00:01:59,792 --> 00:02:02,458 I like being a cop. And having a good time. 11 00:02:03,417 --> 00:02:05,917 Live and let live, that's all. 12 00:02:06,208 --> 00:02:08,250 But I like the work. 13 00:02:08,542 --> 00:02:13,417 I like the uniform, the car, the whole thing. 14 00:02:13,708 --> 00:02:18,167 The best part about police work is that you get to meet a lot of people. 15 00:02:18,458 --> 00:02:20,750 You learn a lot about human nature. 16 00:02:23,375 --> 00:02:27,208 Miss, it's against the law to hitchhike inside city limits. 17 00:02:27,500 --> 00:02:29,458 - Oh, really? - Sorry. 18 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:31,750 Well, that's ridiculous. This isn't a city. 19 00:02:32,042 --> 00:02:36,250 I can give you a ride outside city limits, if you like, out to the highway. 20 00:02:36,542 --> 00:02:38,042 Okay. 21 00:02:50,292 --> 00:02:53,083 - Are you really a cop? - That's right. 22 00:02:53,375 --> 00:02:54,792 Boy. 23 00:02:55,083 --> 00:02:56,708 - Where you from? - L.A. 24 00:02:57,458 --> 00:02:58,708 City girl. 25 00:02:59,750 --> 00:03:01,917 I don't like cops. 26 00:03:02,208 --> 00:03:03,250 I'm sorry. 27 00:03:03,542 --> 00:03:06,417 Too jumpy and uptight, you know? 28 00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:08,625 Goes with the job, I guess. 29 00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:12,167 Does this work? 30 00:03:15,292 --> 00:03:19,083 Calling all cars, calling all cars, 10-4, Roger, Crawford. 31 00:03:22,042 --> 00:03:24,750 Please, ma'am, not good. 32 00:03:25,042 --> 00:03:27,500 You really dig all that gun crap, don't you? 33 00:03:27,792 --> 00:03:30,875 You know, I bet you don't even have a real pecker. 34 00:03:31,167 --> 00:03:34,208 Just a .45 between your legs. No, not even a .45. 35 00:03:34,500 --> 00:03:37,708 Probably, most likely, a .38 snub nose or something. 36 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,375 Well, let me see what you got down there, huh? 37 00:03:40,667 --> 00:03:42,375 What is this, huh? 38 00:03:43,292 --> 00:03:45,208 Let me see. Oh. 39 00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:48,500 Oh. Oh! It's a bazooka. 40 00:03:48,792 --> 00:03:50,792 - Oh, my god. - Ha-ha! Woo-hoo! 41 00:04:07,792 --> 00:04:09,625 Let's get out of here. 42 00:04:40,125 --> 00:04:42,167 - It's hot. - Yeah. Come on, let's go in. 43 00:04:42,458 --> 00:04:44,042 Well, we got about five more minutes. 44 00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:45,518 Well, we got about four minutes. 45 00:04:45,542 --> 00:04:47,083 So, we got about four minutes. 46 00:04:47,375 --> 00:04:48,708 Jesus Christ. 47 00:04:49,625 --> 00:04:51,417 Be good. 48 00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:53,250 Goodbye, judge. 49 00:04:53,542 --> 00:04:54,875 Bye-bye, judge. 50 00:04:55,958 --> 00:04:58,417 Judge's wife. Mrs. Crawford. 51 00:04:58,708 --> 00:05:00,868 That's disgusting. Married to an old cocker like that. 52 00:05:06,792 --> 00:05:08,833 Norwegian broad. 53 00:05:09,125 --> 00:05:10,458 Met the judge on a cruise. 54 00:05:12,292 --> 00:05:15,000 Norwegians do anything for a laugh. 55 00:05:15,292 --> 00:05:17,372 A man should be able to choose the way he dies, huh? 56 00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:18,708 Yeah. 57 00:05:25,125 --> 00:05:26,500 That's disgusting. 58 00:05:28,208 --> 00:05:30,792 Somebody got his head blown off over in Roane County. 59 00:05:31,083 --> 00:05:32,333 Oh, yeah? 60 00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:35,667 Yeah, some service station guy. Damn shame. 61 00:05:35,958 --> 00:05:40,125 - You got anything on it? - Nope. Just a burglary. 62 00:05:40,417 --> 00:05:43,000 Well, I don't understand it. It's just plain crazy. 63 00:05:43,292 --> 00:05:45,583 Lots of crazies running loose. 64 00:05:45,875 --> 00:05:48,458 More crazies than normals, if you ask me. 65 00:05:48,750 --> 00:05:51,417 Yeah, well, listen I'm going to go grab some breakfast. 66 00:05:51,708 --> 00:05:54,125 All right, catch you in a minute. 67 00:05:54,417 --> 00:05:55,500 O'Neil's doing all right. 68 00:05:56,458 --> 00:05:58,542 Yeah, he's doing all right. 69 00:05:58,833 --> 00:06:02,375 - Needs a little more experience. - He'll get it soon. 70 00:06:02,667 --> 00:06:04,667 - I wish, boy, I really wish. - Wish what? 71 00:06:04,958 --> 00:06:06,518 Wish those killers would come this way. 72 00:06:06,625 --> 00:06:08,375 Yeah, what would you do? 73 00:06:09,958 --> 00:06:11,042 I hate to think about it. 74 00:06:13,542 --> 00:06:15,958 Killers. They get away with murder. 75 00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:29,167 Hey, come on in. 76 00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:33,458 Well, how do you like it? 77 00:06:33,750 --> 00:06:35,750 - Like what? - Town. 78 00:06:36,042 --> 00:06:37,917 You been here, goin' on three months. 79 00:06:38,208 --> 00:06:39,208 Oh, I like it a lot. 80 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,708 Most cops we get around here are too old to catch a fart. 81 00:06:47,542 --> 00:06:51,333 Yeah, this is a real peaceful, law-abiding town. 82 00:06:51,625 --> 00:06:53,333 And you know what? I'll tell you. 83 00:06:53,625 --> 00:06:56,000 We got the best iookin' women in the world, right here. 84 00:06:56,292 --> 00:06:57,417 Healthy women. 85 00:06:57,708 --> 00:06:59,708 - Now, take Ruby. - I'll take Ruby. 86 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:03,160 Oh, shit, shut up, shorty, you wouldn't know what to do with her if you had her. 87 00:07:04,167 --> 00:07:06,708 Something happens to the women in the city. 88 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,917 I noticed, they seem to shrivel up from the smog or something. 89 00:07:10,208 --> 00:07:13,125 Tits look like them two damn eggs over there. 90 00:07:13,417 --> 00:07:15,042 - Milk, right? - Right. 91 00:07:29,292 --> 00:07:30,833 I bet it's a woman. 92 00:07:31,125 --> 00:07:32,885 I bet you any amount of money, it's a woman. 93 00:07:33,042 --> 00:07:35,208 - It was your fault. - My fault? 94 00:07:36,292 --> 00:07:37,833 Hello, ladies. 95 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,750 General, she just ran right into me. 96 00:07:41,042 --> 00:07:43,333 Hmm. Let's take a look. 97 00:07:45,167 --> 00:07:47,250 Well, everything seems to be all right. 98 00:07:47,542 --> 00:07:50,250 - I was just worried about my cake. - Your cake? 99 00:07:50,542 --> 00:07:52,083 Yeah, it's part of my act. 100 00:07:52,375 --> 00:07:54,583 And I had it specially made for my body. 101 00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:57,542 Oh, do you come out of the cake naked? 102 00:07:57,833 --> 00:08:00,000 - Just about. - I'd like to see that. 103 00:08:00,292 --> 00:08:02,583 Oh, you can, honey. I perform for everybody. 104 00:08:02,875 --> 00:08:06,542 Weddings, bachelor parties, wakes... 105 00:08:06,833 --> 00:08:08,833 Well, I'm glad your cake is okay. 106 00:08:09,125 --> 00:08:10,333 You're sweet. 107 00:08:10,625 --> 00:08:12,042 Excuse me. 108 00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:13,653 Everything seems to be all right. 109 00:08:13,708 --> 00:08:15,875 It's her fault. She backed right up into me. 110 00:08:16,167 --> 00:08:18,042 Hmm, well, may I see your driver's license? 111 00:08:25,375 --> 00:08:28,208 Lisa... crotch? 112 00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:31,083 - Krowtch. - Well, miss krowtch, uh, 113 00:08:31,375 --> 00:08:33,895 nobody's hurt and unless you want to make a formal complaint... 114 00:08:34,042 --> 00:08:35,875 No, thank you. It's the principle. 115 00:08:36,167 --> 00:08:37,647 Well, listen, my name's Jimmy O'Neil 116 00:08:37,708 --> 00:08:39,809 and I have some food waiting in there which is getting cold, 117 00:08:39,833 --> 00:08:42,351 if you'd like to come in there and have some coffee and talk about it... 118 00:08:42,375 --> 00:08:44,542 No, thank you. Officer. 119 00:08:46,583 --> 00:08:49,500 Have a nice day. 120 00:08:49,792 --> 00:08:52,375 Well, listen now, what do you do after you come out of the cake? 121 00:08:52,667 --> 00:08:57,167 Nothing illegal. You know I get out and I dance. 122 00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,542 Then I sit in the honored party's lap... 123 00:08:59,833 --> 00:09:02,250 Oh, but it takes a special talent. 124 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,292 You know, you have to be able to talk. 125 00:09:04,583 --> 00:09:07,583 Talk to all kinds of people about all kinds of subjects. 126 00:09:07,875 --> 00:09:09,417 You have to be intelligent. 127 00:09:09,708 --> 00:09:13,000 - It's not just jumping out of the cake. - I'm sure. 128 00:09:13,292 --> 00:09:14,833 - See you around. - Thanks. 129 00:09:20,458 --> 00:09:22,059 I don't know, the girls today, they're really weird. 130 00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:25,292 They walk around with no bras, no panties, no slips. 131 00:09:25,583 --> 00:09:29,042 Show everything to everybody. Leave nothing for the imagination. 132 00:09:29,333 --> 00:09:31,500 What people got to learn is self-discipline. 133 00:09:32,625 --> 00:09:34,417 That's the main thing. 134 00:09:36,292 --> 00:09:39,012 When I was playing third trumpet in the High School marching band... 135 00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:41,417 - Third trumpet? - Yeah. 136 00:09:41,708 --> 00:09:44,417 - You learn a lot about intricate marching. - Intricate marching? 137 00:09:46,375 --> 00:09:49,542 - What's so funny about that? - Intricate marching. 138 00:09:49,833 --> 00:09:52,583 Hey, look, oh, Jesus Christ, there they are at it again. 139 00:09:58,042 --> 00:09:59,917 Get up! 140 00:10:00,208 --> 00:10:02,042 Get up, and I'm gonna give you a good one. 141 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,583 All right, all right. 142 00:10:05,875 --> 00:10:08,292 - Oh, officer, hold me back. - Yeah, I got you. 143 00:10:08,583 --> 00:10:11,292 Come on, okay. Come on. Come on now. 144 00:10:15,667 --> 00:10:18,208 Yeah, I mean, Annie, what do you call yourself? 145 00:10:18,500 --> 00:10:22,833 I mean, a call girl? A prostitute? Well, honey, let me tell you, I am a whore. 146 00:10:23,125 --> 00:10:26,125 And I ain't got no pimp telling me what kind of clothes to wear, 147 00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:28,917 what kind of perfume to buy, no siree Bob. 148 00:10:29,208 --> 00:10:31,583 And, another thing. This town ain't got enough business 149 00:10:31,875 --> 00:10:34,625 to keep a whore alive, let alone a prostitute. 150 00:10:34,917 --> 00:10:37,877 So that's why I got me this route. You know, like those circuit preachers? 151 00:10:38,125 --> 00:10:41,417 I mean, one week this town, one week the next. You know what I mean? 152 00:10:44,583 --> 00:10:46,667 How you doing, sweetness? 153 00:10:47,625 --> 00:10:48,917 Fine, thank you. How are you? 154 00:10:49,208 --> 00:10:52,250 All right, if I can't sell it, I just sits on it. 155 00:10:52,542 --> 00:10:53,667 That's a waste. 156 00:10:53,958 --> 00:10:56,917 You telling me, I just might give you a little bit, though. 157 00:10:57,208 --> 00:10:58,333 You serious? 158 00:10:59,958 --> 00:11:02,125 You know my room at the hotel? 159 00:11:02,417 --> 00:11:05,217 You bring your little book, 'cause we going to break some little laws. 160 00:11:13,292 --> 00:11:15,375 Happy birthday, Harold. 161 00:11:26,708 --> 00:11:28,458 Show me your pussy. 162 00:11:28,750 --> 00:11:30,458 Get up there. Get up on the table. 163 00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:32,708 Come here, come here, I love you. I love you. 164 00:11:34,708 --> 00:11:36,000 No, I love her. 165 00:11:36,292 --> 00:11:38,309 - Do the twist! - I love her more than you'll ever. 166 00:11:38,333 --> 00:11:39,750 Give me... 167 00:11:40,042 --> 00:11:41,402 Just check out her boobs... 168 00:11:43,042 --> 00:11:44,042 The action... 169 00:11:46,292 --> 00:11:47,917 Eat that cake. 170 00:12:00,542 --> 00:12:02,375 Come on, Scott. Come on. 171 00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:08,417 Oh, sweetness. You're learning. 172 00:12:08,708 --> 00:12:11,500 Pretty soon you're gonna be a real professional, I know. 173 00:12:11,792 --> 00:12:13,875 How long you going to be gone? 174 00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:16,417 - Two weeks. - Oh. 175 00:12:16,708 --> 00:12:19,667 - Have a good time. - I'm going to give it all I got. 176 00:12:19,958 --> 00:12:21,500 Well, don't wear yourself out. 177 00:12:21,792 --> 00:12:26,417 Honey, them big trains wear out before the tracks. 178 00:12:26,708 --> 00:12:28,167 - Is that true? - Oh, yeah. 179 00:12:28,458 --> 00:12:29,542 See you later. 180 00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:44,667 General. 181 00:12:44,958 --> 00:12:46,393 They're about to tear me to pieces down there. 182 00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:48,184 - You came out of the cake? - And they went crazy. 183 00:12:48,208 --> 00:12:49,208 I can understand that. 184 00:13:10,958 --> 00:13:14,917 I've got to get my cake back. It's specially made. 185 00:13:15,208 --> 00:13:17,458 Couldn't you show them your badge or something? 186 00:13:17,750 --> 00:13:19,750 - I don't have it. - Oh. 187 00:13:28,792 --> 00:13:31,583 It's real close in here, isn't it? 188 00:13:31,875 --> 00:13:34,125 Yeah. 189 00:13:34,417 --> 00:13:36,792 What you got in your pocket? A Blackjack? 190 00:13:37,625 --> 00:13:39,125 Nothing. 191 00:13:39,792 --> 00:13:41,417 Oh, my word. 192 00:13:41,708 --> 00:13:44,375 I stayed in that closet for two hours. 193 00:13:44,667 --> 00:13:48,375 A policeman is never off duty. In uniform or out. 194 00:13:57,375 --> 00:13:59,417 I said that already. Accion. 195 00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:01,500 What in the hell are you doing? 196 00:14:01,792 --> 00:14:03,167 Habla espanol. 197 00:14:03,458 --> 00:14:04,458 What? 198 00:14:04,667 --> 00:14:05,893 Learning to speak the language of the people. 199 00:14:05,917 --> 00:14:08,750 In case I get a police city job, it'll help me. 200 00:14:09,042 --> 00:14:10,542 - That's smart. - Si. 201 00:14:12,625 --> 00:14:14,042 Thank you, Clyde. 202 00:14:14,333 --> 00:14:16,917 Boring, boring, boring. 203 00:14:17,208 --> 00:14:18,958 You know I had a dream last night. 204 00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:24,375 That I was drowning in a pool and pat Boone's life flashed before my eyes. 205 00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:27,750 When I joined the police force I wanted some action, some excitement. 206 00:14:28,042 --> 00:14:29,125 Something. 207 00:14:29,417 --> 00:14:31,167 You ought to go to L.A. 208 00:14:31,458 --> 00:14:33,667 I'm thinking about it very seriously. 209 00:14:33,958 --> 00:14:37,417 Trying to get something going right now. Get the old heart pounding. 210 00:14:37,708 --> 00:14:39,917 I'd go straight to the vice squad. 211 00:14:40,208 --> 00:14:41,750 It's not a bad idea. 212 00:14:42,042 --> 00:14:44,143 You know, there must be some vice in this town somewhere. 213 00:14:44,167 --> 00:14:47,583 Yeah, two circuit hookers. Waste of time to even bust 'em. 214 00:14:49,583 --> 00:14:52,042 You're young. You wait, O'Neil. 215 00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:54,833 You'll get bored too. 216 00:14:55,125 --> 00:14:56,792 Well, I don't know. 217 00:14:57,083 --> 00:14:59,143 You can get killed out there, if things get too exciting. 218 00:14:59,167 --> 00:15:00,583 Yeah. 219 00:15:00,875 --> 00:15:03,000 Well, some things are worse than death. 220 00:15:09,458 --> 00:15:13,417 You better stop reading that crap, rooster. You're gonna go blind. 221 00:15:24,042 --> 00:15:27,125 - Where's O'Neil? - Getting dressed. Hate to do it. 222 00:15:31,042 --> 00:15:33,542 Damn, O'Neil. You look real nice. 223 00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:38,792 You look lovely. Really lovely. 224 00:15:39,083 --> 00:15:42,750 Anyway, we know this guy comes in to the hospital parking lot and... 225 00:15:43,042 --> 00:15:46,292 Shakes his organ and, uh... Screams some obscenity and uh... 226 00:15:46,583 --> 00:15:47,583 Good luck, O'Neil. 227 00:15:47,875 --> 00:15:49,667 Only one thing wrong with your legs, O'Neil. 228 00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:51,917 What's that? 229 00:15:52,208 --> 00:15:54,042 They go right up to your ass. 230 00:16:09,875 --> 00:16:11,292 Oh, my god. 231 00:16:16,042 --> 00:16:17,875 I don't believe it. 232 00:16:20,792 --> 00:16:24,792 Please, just be quiet. I... I know it's funny. I think it's funny. 233 00:16:26,792 --> 00:16:30,250 Excuse me, I... sorry, I don't mean to bother you 234 00:16:30,542 --> 00:16:32,750 but I'm a little lost and I was just wondering 235 00:16:33,042 --> 00:16:35,101 if there might happen to be a telephone around here, 236 00:16:35,125 --> 00:16:37,083 that maybe I could possibly use? 237 00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:42,375 That's right, laugh. Laugh, you suffering suckers! 238 00:16:42,667 --> 00:16:45,667 And look. Look at the magic wand of Willard. 239 00:16:45,958 --> 00:16:48,000 The primitive prick of the potentate. 240 00:16:48,292 --> 00:16:51,667 Touch it and fondle the mandrake root. 241 00:16:51,958 --> 00:16:53,458 Wait a minute, hold it. 242 00:16:53,750 --> 00:16:57,917 Yes, yes, hold it. I love it. Hold it. 243 00:16:58,208 --> 00:17:00,375 But wait a minute, I'm a police officer. 244 00:17:11,458 --> 00:17:13,375 - I love you. - Police. 245 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:23,708 Look out. 246 00:17:41,458 --> 00:17:43,042 Please don't resist. 247 00:17:44,250 --> 00:17:45,542 Jesus Christ! 248 00:17:47,292 --> 00:17:48,875 I broke my heel. 249 00:17:59,542 --> 00:18:02,375 This is very unconstitutional, you know that. 250 00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:12,042 Don't be so rough. 251 00:18:12,750 --> 00:18:14,208 Sorry. 252 00:18:20,125 --> 00:18:22,333 You know, you think I'm weird, 253 00:18:24,250 --> 00:18:26,708 you ought to take a look at yourself. 254 00:18:28,250 --> 00:18:30,333 Yeah, dressed up in drag, 255 00:18:31,833 --> 00:18:34,333 beating up on a little guy like me. 256 00:18:36,792 --> 00:18:41,042 Unit one, the Jones are at it again, over at 1224 south wigham. 257 00:19:41,583 --> 00:19:43,750 Cow, bitch of a wife. 258 00:19:44,042 --> 00:19:46,250 You puddin' assed load of shit. 259 00:19:51,458 --> 00:19:53,583 I'm gonna kill you this time! 260 00:19:53,875 --> 00:19:56,708 I'm gonna sit on you till you suffocate. 261 00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,583 You puddin' assed load of shit. 262 00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:10,833 Uh, anybody home? 263 00:20:13,875 --> 00:20:15,542 Hi. 264 00:20:15,833 --> 00:20:18,333 Sweety pie, there's an officer out here. 265 00:20:20,792 --> 00:20:23,458 Why, hello. What's the matter? 266 00:20:23,750 --> 00:20:26,625 Well, uh, we have a little complaint from one of your neighbors. 267 00:20:26,917 --> 00:20:28,125 Complaint? 268 00:20:28,417 --> 00:20:30,917 Yeah, they thought somebody was getting killed in here. 269 00:20:31,208 --> 00:20:34,417 - Oh, that's ridiculous. - It sure is. 270 00:20:34,708 --> 00:20:37,375 Officer, you know how it is. Are you married? 271 00:20:38,333 --> 00:20:40,750 Uh... no, I'm not. 272 00:20:41,042 --> 00:20:45,292 Well, every now and then a husband and wife have a tiny argument. 273 00:20:45,583 --> 00:20:48,833 Nothing serious, you know, but they just have to get it out. 274 00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:58,208 Well, I understand, but it's still against the law to disturb the peace. 275 00:20:58,500 --> 00:20:59,833 Disturb the peace? 276 00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:02,875 Looks like it's going to be a beautiful day, officer. 277 00:21:03,167 --> 00:21:04,792 Yeah, looks that way. 278 00:21:08,625 --> 00:21:10,000 - Okay. - Officer. 279 00:21:10,292 --> 00:21:13,375 Everything is all right. Don't worry about a thing. 280 00:21:16,375 --> 00:21:17,958 Toodle-oo. 281 00:21:18,250 --> 00:21:21,000 Goodbye. Have a nice day. 282 00:21:23,625 --> 00:21:25,167 What a wonderful man. 283 00:21:25,458 --> 00:21:27,458 He's such a sweet boy. 284 00:21:27,750 --> 00:21:31,250 - But I like a real man. - Oh, you, oh, baby. 285 00:21:36,375 --> 00:21:38,935 The chief liked for us to get involved in the community, 286 00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:41,583 so I became coach of the butternut kittens. 287 00:21:47,292 --> 00:21:49,375 We had an up and down season. 288 00:22:17,625 --> 00:22:21,042 And I wish I could screw O'Neil like I screwed that game. 289 00:22:22,125 --> 00:22:25,250 - Oh, Jimmy. - Jimmy O'Neil. 290 00:22:25,542 --> 00:22:28,667 - Oh, he's sexy. - Older men are sexy. 291 00:22:28,958 --> 00:22:31,042 Anyway, he doesn't notice us. 292 00:22:32,792 --> 00:22:34,917 I had a dream that he arrested me. 293 00:22:35,208 --> 00:22:38,583 And he frisked you until you started breathing. 294 00:22:38,875 --> 00:22:42,208 He lifted up my skirt with his shotgun, then I froze. 295 00:22:42,500 --> 00:22:43,875 And then? 296 00:22:44,167 --> 00:22:46,208 - I woke up. - Oh. 297 00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:51,708 Lisa was the coach of the Armstrong Amazons. 298 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:55,000 It would seem that a nurse would have some mercy. 299 00:22:56,042 --> 00:22:57,375 She didn't. 300 00:23:01,292 --> 00:23:04,583 - How's the hospital? - Sick, lot's of sickness. 301 00:23:07,042 --> 00:23:10,083 - Well, it was a nice game. - Yeah, I like to win. 302 00:23:10,375 --> 00:23:13,250 - I can tell that. - You're not a very good coach. 303 00:23:13,542 --> 00:23:16,208 Well, uh, I don't have the killer instinct. 304 00:23:16,500 --> 00:23:17,500 Well, that's part of it. 305 00:23:22,750 --> 00:23:25,792 Listen, uh, why don't you give me a break? 306 00:23:26,083 --> 00:23:27,917 Come on, officer, what do you want? 307 00:23:28,208 --> 00:23:32,000 I get the feeling that you don't like me. It's just a feeling, but... 308 00:23:32,292 --> 00:23:34,500 I think that's because you've got me all wrong. 309 00:23:34,792 --> 00:23:39,625 Well, listen, there's this birthday party for my partner, Lassiter... 310 00:23:39,917 --> 00:23:44,042 It's just a small thing, uh, a chance for you to get to know me better. 311 00:23:46,333 --> 00:23:47,375 Okay. 312 00:23:49,208 --> 00:23:50,917 - How you feeling? - Very good. 313 00:23:53,417 --> 00:23:55,250 - You happy you came? - Mmm-hmm. 314 00:24:03,250 --> 00:24:06,000 You know, I think I had you all wrong, O'Neil. 315 00:24:06,292 --> 00:24:08,625 He knows only to have one eye open. 316 00:24:11,208 --> 00:24:13,417 Did you see what O'Neil got me for my birthday? 317 00:24:13,708 --> 00:24:15,375 - No. - Look at this, right here. 318 00:24:18,083 --> 00:24:19,958 Isn't that great? 319 00:24:20,250 --> 00:24:22,583 O'Neil! Look at this, your birthday present. 320 00:24:22,875 --> 00:24:23,917 Oh. 321 00:24:25,708 --> 00:24:28,388 - It looks very well on you. - Yeah, when I do it, I can see better. 322 00:24:30,458 --> 00:24:31,958 They keep scars away. 323 00:24:33,875 --> 00:24:35,417 Oh, god! 324 00:24:40,792 --> 00:24:42,458 Wait a minute. 325 00:24:42,750 --> 00:24:44,708 Oh, look at the little squirrel! 326 00:24:46,292 --> 00:24:48,917 Look at that little squirrel, O'Neil. 327 00:24:49,208 --> 00:24:50,792 Look at that... 328 00:24:52,625 --> 00:24:54,785 You and your squirrel, get out of here, we want quiet. 329 00:24:54,958 --> 00:24:56,250 Quiet, quiet. 330 00:24:57,750 --> 00:24:59,458 Hey, you want some potato chips? 331 00:24:59,750 --> 00:25:01,042 - Watch. - No. 332 00:25:03,750 --> 00:25:05,792 Right? Like how they crackle. 333 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,833 I know that I am a cold fish. 334 00:25:17,125 --> 00:25:18,708 Cold fish. 335 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:20,917 - Two cold fish. - I know that... 336 00:25:23,542 --> 00:25:28,500 I know that... I am a cold fish. I'm not. 337 00:25:28,792 --> 00:25:31,625 - No. - I really want to feel something for people. 338 00:25:31,917 --> 00:25:34,750 - I know that you are the action type. - Action. 339 00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:38,458 I know that Vera likes you a lot. 340 00:25:40,042 --> 00:25:41,708 I'm one with nature. 341 00:25:45,250 --> 00:25:47,250 But I'm the shy type. 342 00:25:48,667 --> 00:25:53,417 And it's really hard for me to open up. 343 00:25:53,708 --> 00:25:57,917 - That's true. - But right now I feel like... 344 00:25:58,208 --> 00:26:01,458 I can really open up to you. 345 00:26:01,750 --> 00:26:04,042 I mean, I really feel like I can... 346 00:26:05,542 --> 00:26:07,917 Open up. Do you know what I mean? 347 00:26:26,625 --> 00:26:28,417 You kicked me in the balls! 348 00:26:28,708 --> 00:26:32,542 I'm gonna take that goddamn popcorn, shove it down your nose and pull it out your ass. 349 00:26:55,583 --> 00:26:57,292 - How's tricks? - The same. 350 00:27:19,458 --> 00:27:22,458 All right! Who started this fight? 351 00:27:22,750 --> 00:27:25,833 - He did. - He did. 352 00:27:26,125 --> 00:27:29,583 Craddock, craddock, craddock. Get out of here, will you? Get out of here. 353 00:27:42,292 --> 00:27:43,667 Excuse me. 354 00:27:43,958 --> 00:27:47,417 I don't want to seem hysterical, but I am hysterical. 355 00:27:47,708 --> 00:27:50,708 There's a prowler outside. I saw him looking in my window. 356 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:52,250 Are you sure? 357 00:27:54,375 --> 00:27:58,042 Well, I wouldn't come over here in the middle of the night if I wasn't sure. 358 00:28:17,375 --> 00:28:20,042 Ruby was a good neighbor. 359 00:28:20,333 --> 00:28:22,125 With a good imagination. 360 00:28:23,208 --> 00:28:25,750 Didn't see a thing. 361 00:28:26,042 --> 00:28:29,083 Well, I'm sure I didn't imagine it. 362 00:28:29,375 --> 00:28:32,917 You know, there are girls who get turned on by the uniform. 363 00:28:33,208 --> 00:28:35,417 They want to ball a cop. 364 00:28:35,708 --> 00:28:38,042 Some will even suck on your badge. 365 00:28:38,333 --> 00:28:42,667 A cop is usually ovennorked, underpaid and misunderstood. 366 00:28:43,625 --> 00:28:45,167 But he should never be horny. 367 00:28:47,750 --> 00:28:49,792 Man, that city council. 368 00:28:50,083 --> 00:28:53,583 It's a third time in a row they voted down air conditioning for patrol cars. 369 00:28:54,625 --> 00:28:57,083 They just flat turned it down. 370 00:28:57,375 --> 00:28:59,417 Well, what do you expect? It's a small town. 371 00:28:59,708 --> 00:29:01,208 No, it's a dull town. 372 00:29:10,583 --> 00:29:12,292 I've been on this job five years, 373 00:29:12,583 --> 00:29:14,333 I picked up 40 speeders, 374 00:29:14,625 --> 00:29:17,375 five drunken drivers and one burglar. 375 00:29:17,667 --> 00:29:21,250 Unit one, O'Neil, a gorilla on the loose over at the bekins building. 376 00:29:21,542 --> 00:29:22,917 Now a gorilla. 377 00:29:24,167 --> 00:29:26,458 Unit one, we're on our way. 378 00:29:27,208 --> 00:29:28,458 A gorilla. 379 00:29:50,625 --> 00:29:52,333 It's up there. Way up on the building. 380 00:29:52,625 --> 00:29:54,208 - Way up top there. - Yeah. 381 00:29:55,792 --> 00:29:58,375 Okay, ma'am, it's just bill in a gorilla suit. 382 00:30:00,292 --> 00:30:03,667 Listen, he did the same show in 1970. It's a bad act. 383 00:30:03,958 --> 00:30:05,208 Grab the booze. 384 00:30:30,458 --> 00:30:32,351 Come on now, get your ass out of the way. 385 00:30:32,375 --> 00:30:34,015 I'm moving, Lassiter, I'm moving. 386 00:30:34,208 --> 00:30:36,625 - Move it! - I'm moving. 387 00:30:36,917 --> 00:30:40,000 You weigh 50 pounds less than me and you're moving like an old lady. 388 00:30:40,292 --> 00:30:43,292 - I don't like heights! - What do you mean, you don't like heights? 389 00:30:43,583 --> 00:30:45,917 Vertigo. It's a good time to find out you got vertigo. 390 00:30:46,208 --> 00:30:47,208 Terrific. 391 00:30:47,458 --> 00:30:48,583 Okay, Bill. Bill. 392 00:30:49,792 --> 00:30:51,542 All right, hold it now. 393 00:30:51,833 --> 00:30:53,708 Don't you come any closer, I'll jump! 394 00:30:57,792 --> 00:31:00,917 Oh, come on, Bill. You could get arrested for that. 395 00:31:01,208 --> 00:31:02,958 For what? 396 00:31:03,250 --> 00:31:05,333 Impersonating an officer? 397 00:31:05,625 --> 00:31:07,065 - Look... - Don't you come any closer. 398 00:31:07,250 --> 00:31:08,750 Just don'tjump yet, bill. Not yet. 399 00:31:09,042 --> 00:31:11,375 - Oh, who cares. - We care. 400 00:31:11,667 --> 00:31:13,708 Oh, nobody gives a damn anymore. 401 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:15,560 Don't you come any closer or I'll jump! 402 00:31:15,750 --> 00:31:18,083 - I'm warning you. - Look, Bill, for you. For you. 403 00:31:21,292 --> 00:31:23,458 Just trying to tempt me, huh. 404 00:31:23,750 --> 00:31:26,375 Just trying to tempt me, that's what you're doing. 405 00:31:30,417 --> 00:31:31,497 How you feeling, old timer. 406 00:31:31,708 --> 00:31:34,167 I feel like hell, that's how I feel. 407 00:31:34,458 --> 00:31:37,125 All lonely and all messed up. 408 00:31:37,417 --> 00:31:39,792 You know, you did a hell of a job on that ledge. 409 00:31:40,083 --> 00:31:43,667 I should. I was a high-wire artist at one time. 410 00:31:43,958 --> 00:31:45,238 A championship high-wire artist. 411 00:31:45,375 --> 00:31:46,375 No kidding. 412 00:31:46,542 --> 00:31:47,542 Here have a drink. 413 00:31:47,708 --> 00:31:48,917 No, against regulations. 414 00:31:49,208 --> 00:31:51,417 Bill, why you always doing this for? 415 00:31:51,708 --> 00:31:53,292 I don't know. 416 00:31:53,583 --> 00:31:55,875 I get so lonely and depressed. 417 00:31:57,833 --> 00:32:00,375 I just have to drag out the old gorilla suit. 418 00:32:02,792 --> 00:32:04,500 Come on. Let's go, Bill. 419 00:32:04,792 --> 00:32:05,792 How you feeling now? 420 00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:08,167 I feel like shit, that's how I feel. 421 00:32:09,917 --> 00:32:12,917 When it rains, it pours. 422 00:32:13,208 --> 00:32:15,083 My life was getting complicated and confusing. 423 00:32:17,583 --> 00:32:20,042 I mean, when do you ever get enough? 424 00:32:35,708 --> 00:32:37,875 - The prowler is back. - You're joking! 425 00:32:39,333 --> 00:32:40,792 So what? 426 00:33:26,833 --> 00:33:28,417 How about some ham and eggs? 427 00:33:35,458 --> 00:33:37,042 How you doing, honey? 428 00:33:37,333 --> 00:33:39,542 Just fine. Coffee? 429 00:33:39,833 --> 00:33:41,375 No. A beer. 430 00:33:43,583 --> 00:33:44,583 Beer 431 00:33:44,792 --> 00:33:45,917 Three beers. 432 00:33:47,625 --> 00:33:50,792 - You guys passing through? - That's right. 433 00:33:51,083 --> 00:33:53,750 I used to be on the route a lot myself, once. 434 00:33:54,042 --> 00:33:55,542 You're a good-looking woman. 435 00:33:57,125 --> 00:33:58,292 Thank you. 436 00:33:58,583 --> 00:34:00,063 You play around a little, sweetheart? 437 00:34:02,125 --> 00:34:04,875 Only food served here, friend. 438 00:34:05,167 --> 00:34:07,684 Now, if you're looking for something else you're in the wrong place 439 00:34:07,708 --> 00:34:08,958 and this is the wrong town. 440 00:34:09,250 --> 00:34:10,250 Who says? 441 00:34:11,208 --> 00:34:12,667 I says. 442 00:34:16,375 --> 00:34:18,042 How you doing, Jimmy? 443 00:34:18,333 --> 00:34:20,208 Getting a little rushed around here. 444 00:34:24,250 --> 00:34:26,250 Give me a six-pack of beer, please, Ruby. 445 00:34:26,542 --> 00:34:27,542 Sure. 446 00:34:27,792 --> 00:34:30,083 Damn, I didn't know this town had a cop! 447 00:34:30,375 --> 00:34:31,583 Well, now you know. 448 00:34:31,875 --> 00:34:34,000 Hell this is the crime capital of the nation. 449 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:40,625 The uniform is nice. Gun, boots... 450 00:34:40,917 --> 00:34:42,375 Hey, how much they pay you? 451 00:34:43,125 --> 00:34:44,458 Oh, enough to get by. 452 00:34:44,750 --> 00:34:46,590 I bet they make you buy your own bullets. 453 00:34:48,792 --> 00:34:50,167 Jesus! 454 00:34:51,292 --> 00:34:54,083 A cop in this town? What a drag! 455 00:34:56,125 --> 00:34:58,083 We're sorry, officer. 456 00:34:58,375 --> 00:35:00,042 We don't mean to bug you. 457 00:35:01,458 --> 00:35:02,750 We just get a little loud. 458 00:35:06,417 --> 00:35:08,042 You ain't lied yet. 459 00:35:08,333 --> 00:35:10,375 I always say an empty pot makes the most noise. 460 00:35:11,625 --> 00:35:14,083 Forget the eggs. Let's get outta here. 461 00:35:14,375 --> 00:35:15,708 Good idea. 462 00:35:19,625 --> 00:35:21,333 See you later, fuzz dick. 463 00:35:24,958 --> 00:35:27,667 Them three guys are rehearsing for a nervous breakdown. 464 00:35:27,958 --> 00:35:29,375 I thought they were funny. 465 00:35:32,750 --> 00:35:34,583 Thank you. 466 00:35:34,875 --> 00:35:36,875 Tough luck. He was a pigeon. 467 00:35:38,125 --> 00:35:39,125 Yeah! 468 00:35:39,417 --> 00:35:40,958 Bet he's holding a thousand. 469 00:35:41,250 --> 00:35:43,000 And that tight-assed little waitress. 470 00:35:44,917 --> 00:35:47,458 In 1953 471 00:35:47,750 --> 00:35:51,417 squirrel Franklin tried to beat me to death with a 50 cent bag of jellybeans. 472 00:35:51,708 --> 00:35:55,000 Tried to kill me with a bag of jellybeans. 473 00:35:55,292 --> 00:35:56,708 You're lucky. 474 00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:58,458 Could have been jawbreakers. 475 00:35:58,750 --> 00:35:59,830 If the bag hadn't broken... 476 00:36:02,292 --> 00:36:04,042 Hello? Yes. 477 00:36:04,333 --> 00:36:06,708 Yes, yes, yes, you bet. Yes, ma'am. 478 00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:10,208 That's fine. I understand. Right away. 479 00:36:12,417 --> 00:36:14,042 Well, I need a volunteer. 480 00:36:14,333 --> 00:36:16,208 The judge is leaving town today 481 00:36:16,500 --> 00:36:18,333 and needs somebody to babysit Mrs. Crawford. 482 00:36:18,625 --> 00:36:20,125 Oh, a bodyguard. 483 00:36:20,417 --> 00:36:22,250 Well, sort of. 484 00:36:22,542 --> 00:36:24,542 Well, listen, I'm leaving, I could run out there. 485 00:36:24,833 --> 00:36:25,833 Good. 486 00:36:26,583 --> 00:36:28,042 Wait a minute, O'Neil. 487 00:36:30,583 --> 00:36:32,042 Get me a cup of coffee. 488 00:36:34,583 --> 00:36:35,750 Now that's what I call graft. 489 00:36:36,417 --> 00:36:37,750 Power-pedaling. 490 00:36:38,042 --> 00:36:40,323 Using the police force as your own, personal errand boys. 491 00:36:40,542 --> 00:36:41,833 Why, do you wanna go out there? 492 00:36:43,667 --> 00:36:45,042 It's just part of the job. 493 00:36:47,292 --> 00:36:48,958 “Just part of the job." 494 00:36:57,625 --> 00:36:59,875 Oh, I was hoping it was you. 495 00:37:00,167 --> 00:37:01,417 I'm your bodyguard. 496 00:37:01,708 --> 00:37:04,042 Oh, that's nice. Have a seat. Sit down. 497 00:37:08,208 --> 00:37:09,542 Would you have a drink? 498 00:37:09,833 --> 00:37:12,875 A drink? No, no, that's against regulations. 499 00:37:14,208 --> 00:37:16,208 All these rules and regulations. 500 00:37:17,167 --> 00:37:18,917 I'm free. 501 00:37:20,333 --> 00:37:21,375 That means, "like a bird." 502 00:37:25,292 --> 00:37:27,875 Do you like my body? 503 00:37:28,167 --> 00:37:30,958 Uh, yeah, I guess wouldn't be guarding it if I didn't like it. 504 00:37:31,250 --> 00:37:32,250 I'm proud of my body. 505 00:37:32,542 --> 00:37:34,750 I can understand that. 506 00:37:35,042 --> 00:37:37,875 Oh, you might offer to rub some lotion on my back. 507 00:37:41,708 --> 00:37:43,708 What do you do for fun around here? 508 00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:45,875 Oh, just hang out. 509 00:37:46,875 --> 00:37:49,250 I bet you hang out, O'Neil. 510 00:37:49,542 --> 00:37:50,875 That is your name, O'Neil? 511 00:37:51,167 --> 00:37:52,792 Yes, that's right. 512 00:37:53,083 --> 00:37:54,708 Are you discreet, O'Neil? 513 00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:56,042 I use deodorant. 514 00:37:58,333 --> 00:38:01,792 You know what the judge would do if he saw this whole scene? 515 00:38:03,583 --> 00:38:05,792 - No, ma'am. - He would shoot you. 516 00:38:08,417 --> 00:38:12,375 Do you know what he would do if he caught us in bed together? 517 00:38:12,667 --> 00:38:13,875 He'd shoot me? 518 00:38:15,125 --> 00:38:16,542 Well... 519 00:38:19,792 --> 00:38:23,417 What would you rather be shot for? 520 00:38:23,708 --> 00:38:26,625 Rubbing my back or making love to me? 521 00:38:31,542 --> 00:38:32,792 Give me 10 seconds. 522 00:38:35,458 --> 00:38:37,000 Don't beat around the bush. 523 00:38:37,292 --> 00:38:39,250 I told you I was discreet. 524 00:38:39,542 --> 00:38:41,000 Well, I'm not. 525 00:38:44,542 --> 00:38:46,750 My husband never fucks in the car. 526 00:38:47,042 --> 00:38:48,684 I'm sure that's true. 527 00:38:48,708 --> 00:38:51,042 Once a month in bed, that's all. 528 00:38:51,333 --> 00:38:52,500 I'm so frustrated. 529 00:38:52,792 --> 00:38:54,184 I don't think that's enough for you. 530 00:38:54,208 --> 00:38:57,083 Look at you. Oh, look at your body. 531 00:39:02,542 --> 00:39:04,083 Oh, you're very pretty. 532 00:39:04,375 --> 00:39:05,792 Oh, thank you. 533 00:39:09,625 --> 00:39:11,583 That's helpful. 534 00:39:11,875 --> 00:39:14,375 Mrs. Judge, fantastic. 535 00:39:34,708 --> 00:39:37,250 Oh, I got a cramp. Let's change positions. 536 00:39:43,875 --> 00:39:45,417 You're delicious. 537 00:40:07,958 --> 00:40:10,083 Okay, kittens! We have five seconds to go. 538 00:40:10,375 --> 00:40:12,101 All you have to do is hold on to the ball, right? 539 00:40:12,125 --> 00:40:13,125 Right! 540 00:40:13,292 --> 00:40:14,292 One, two, three... 541 00:40:14,458 --> 00:40:15,500 Let's go! 542 00:40:53,250 --> 00:40:55,542 When I win this championship, 543 00:40:55,833 --> 00:40:58,417 wow, my parents are gonna let me use their car more often, 544 00:40:58,708 --> 00:41:00,542 I won't have to study so much. 545 00:41:03,583 --> 00:41:05,958 Amazons are known to be big. 546 00:41:13,667 --> 00:41:15,250 We finally got you. 547 00:41:15,542 --> 00:41:16,875 At last. 548 00:41:17,167 --> 00:41:20,333 Listen, I'm sorry about the other day. It was rude. 549 00:41:20,625 --> 00:41:22,125 Forget it. 550 00:41:22,417 --> 00:41:23,125 Well, it was just one of those things, you know. 551 00:41:23,417 --> 00:41:24,583 Yeah, well, I'm just a bitch. 552 00:41:24,875 --> 00:41:25,875 No, no, you're not. 553 00:41:26,042 --> 00:41:27,583 When I'm around you I am. 554 00:41:27,875 --> 00:41:30,542 Listen, I'm just an average guy trying to get by. 555 00:41:30,833 --> 00:41:32,208 Bullshit! 556 00:41:32,500 --> 00:41:34,580 What out. When you get pissed your nipples stand up. 557 00:41:34,833 --> 00:41:37,167 O'Neil, you just don't understand, do you? 558 00:41:37,458 --> 00:41:39,500 You really hurt my feelings! 559 00:41:40,375 --> 00:41:42,042 I'm sorry. 560 00:41:42,333 --> 00:41:45,083 You know, you really think you're god's gift to women, don't you? 561 00:41:45,375 --> 00:41:47,208 Playing around behind your badge. 562 00:41:47,500 --> 00:41:49,750 Trying to get into the pants of every girl in town. 563 00:41:50,042 --> 00:41:52,125 As far as I'm concerned you're nothing but 564 00:41:52,417 --> 00:41:55,417 a fucking creep cop! 565 00:41:59,333 --> 00:42:01,083 Not even a good cop. 566 00:42:01,375 --> 00:42:02,542 Hmm. 567 00:42:07,458 --> 00:42:09,792 You piss me off! 568 00:42:10,083 --> 00:42:12,792 You know something? I like a man who's a man. 569 00:42:13,083 --> 00:42:14,333 Not one who plays games. 570 00:42:14,625 --> 00:42:15,726 So if you have any ideas about me, prickhead, 571 00:42:15,750 --> 00:42:17,417 you can just forget it. 572 00:42:22,042 --> 00:42:26,375 Jimmy O'Neil. Jimmy O'Neil. 573 00:42:26,667 --> 00:42:29,667 You know, we've got to figure out some way to get him over here. 574 00:42:33,375 --> 00:42:35,208 Well, come on! Think of something. 575 00:42:35,500 --> 00:42:37,208 I'm thinking, I'm thinking. 576 00:42:41,042 --> 00:42:45,000 Oh, I know. We can call up and report a flying saucer in the backyard. 577 00:42:47,458 --> 00:42:49,750 What about Mr. Waterlee next door? 578 00:42:50,042 --> 00:42:51,583 What about Mr. Waterlee? 579 00:42:51,875 --> 00:42:54,750 Mr. Waterlee. Mr. Waterlee. 580 00:42:55,042 --> 00:42:56,292 What about Mr. Waterlee? 581 00:43:02,542 --> 00:43:04,000 Do you see him out there? 582 00:43:04,292 --> 00:43:05,292 Yeah, I think so. 583 00:43:12,292 --> 00:43:13,292 Okay. 584 00:43:19,833 --> 00:43:22,875 All right, now the blouse. Slowly. 585 00:43:33,292 --> 00:43:34,792 What next? 586 00:43:35,083 --> 00:43:37,500 Sit down and I will show you. 587 00:43:39,500 --> 00:43:41,958 Well, there he is! 588 00:43:56,375 --> 00:43:57,583 Police department. 589 00:43:57,875 --> 00:44:00,375 Watch this, watch this now. This is going to be so beautiful. 590 00:44:03,292 --> 00:44:05,583 Where'd you learn that? 591 00:44:05,875 --> 00:44:08,000 Honey, I was born with it. 592 00:44:09,875 --> 00:44:12,083 Oh, god, this is so groovy! 593 00:44:22,625 --> 00:44:25,000 We blew it! It didn't work! 594 00:44:25,292 --> 00:44:26,375 I know. 595 00:44:26,667 --> 00:44:28,875 Well, at least we've got a bottle of wine left. 596 00:44:29,167 --> 00:44:31,417 Yes. Thank god. 597 00:44:33,708 --> 00:44:35,000 Go! Go! 598 00:44:38,333 --> 00:44:40,208 Come in! 599 00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:42,417 - Come in, coach. - Oh, it's you two. 600 00:44:42,708 --> 00:44:43,875 Bobby and Mary. 601 00:44:44,583 --> 00:44:46,083 Well, uh... 602 00:44:46,375 --> 00:44:47,708 Listen, what are you girls up to? 603 00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:50,042 - Nothing much. - Honest, nothing. 604 00:44:51,917 --> 00:44:53,750 Where are your parents? 605 00:44:54,042 --> 00:44:55,875 They've gone away for the weekend. 606 00:44:56,167 --> 00:44:58,583 Bobby is staying with me until they get back. 607 00:44:58,875 --> 00:45:02,167 We got a "disturbing the peace" complaint from next door. 608 00:45:02,458 --> 00:45:05,958 Ah, it seems that you were making a lot of loud noise and... 609 00:45:06,250 --> 00:45:09,667 Well, actually, that you were parading around in front of the window naked. 610 00:45:09,958 --> 00:45:12,000 - How strange? - Yeah. 611 00:45:12,292 --> 00:45:14,792 Well, that's indecent exposure. 612 00:45:15,083 --> 00:45:16,708 So, what's indecent about it? 613 00:45:18,458 --> 00:45:20,875 Uh, the law. I mean that's the law, that's the law. 614 00:45:21,167 --> 00:45:22,292 Mmm. 615 00:45:22,583 --> 00:45:24,042 We did it on purpose. 616 00:45:24,333 --> 00:45:26,750 Old man Waterlee is always looking in over here. 617 00:45:27,042 --> 00:45:29,167 So, we decided to give him something to look at. 618 00:45:30,125 --> 00:45:31,875 Oh, no! 619 00:45:32,167 --> 00:45:35,375 No, just keep the curtains closed... 620 00:45:35,667 --> 00:45:38,708 And don't shake the old man up. 621 00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:40,750 I mean, you could kill him. 622 00:45:41,042 --> 00:45:42,583 Okay? Okay. 623 00:45:43,333 --> 00:45:44,792 Coach! 624 00:45:45,458 --> 00:45:46,708 You tell him. 625 00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:48,875 Why don't we come over here and sit down? 626 00:45:49,167 --> 00:45:51,500 We have something very important to tell you. 627 00:45:51,792 --> 00:45:53,083 Really. 628 00:45:53,375 --> 00:45:55,500 - Really important. Yeah. - Important? 629 00:45:57,208 --> 00:45:59,375 - Well, just for a minute. Just... - Yeah. 630 00:45:59,667 --> 00:46:00,875 Sit right down there. 631 00:46:01,708 --> 00:46:02,917 Beautiful. 632 00:46:05,458 --> 00:46:08,042 Well, we wanted to get you here. 633 00:46:08,333 --> 00:46:09,333 Hmm. 634 00:46:09,542 --> 00:46:12,125 So, we sat down and we were thinking about it. 635 00:46:13,167 --> 00:46:16,333 And we had two bottles of wine. 636 00:46:16,625 --> 00:46:18,458 So, we drank one bottle. 637 00:46:18,750 --> 00:46:20,125 And we started to think. 638 00:46:20,417 --> 00:46:21,917 We like you. 639 00:46:22,208 --> 00:46:24,625 But you probably think we are too young. 640 00:46:24,917 --> 00:46:28,208 - Seventeen and seventeen is thirty four. - I'm almost eighteen. 641 00:46:29,417 --> 00:46:31,417 Well, listen. I like you girls too. 642 00:46:33,042 --> 00:46:35,125 I mean, you are wonderful for the team. 643 00:46:35,417 --> 00:46:37,708 And you won the championship for me but... 644 00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:39,542 We'll never leave you alone. 645 00:46:39,833 --> 00:46:42,458 We'll follow you and we'll get you sooner or later. 646 00:46:42,750 --> 00:46:44,417 So, you might as well give in right now. 647 00:46:46,292 --> 00:46:47,417 Take off your gun, coach. 648 00:46:47,708 --> 00:46:49,750 Uh, no, I don't need to do that. 649 00:46:50,042 --> 00:46:51,625 Listen, listen... oh man. 650 00:47:08,333 --> 00:47:10,375 I'm gonna get you. 651 00:47:28,917 --> 00:47:30,833 A little bullshit. 652 00:47:31,125 --> 00:47:33,250 Let me see your driver's license and registration. 653 00:47:33,542 --> 00:47:36,000 Sure thing, occifer. 654 00:47:39,958 --> 00:47:41,875 What's happening? 655 00:47:42,167 --> 00:47:44,333 What's the matter, porky? 656 00:47:44,625 --> 00:47:46,375 Well, you got a bad tail light. 657 00:47:47,875 --> 00:47:49,583 Jesus Christ. 658 00:47:50,833 --> 00:47:52,625 We are not looking for trouble. 659 00:47:52,917 --> 00:47:55,625 Looking at a big, tough cop like yourself 660 00:47:56,708 --> 00:47:58,042 with the gun and everything... 661 00:47:59,375 --> 00:48:02,250 - Read it. - Oh, I can't read. 662 00:48:03,833 --> 00:48:06,750 You're really pushing it, fellas. 663 00:48:07,042 --> 00:48:09,917 Anytime you want to take that gun and badge off... 664 00:48:10,208 --> 00:48:11,667 Superman, 665 00:48:11,958 --> 00:48:14,125 I'll push you all over that street. 666 00:48:16,333 --> 00:48:17,583 Bullshit. 667 00:48:18,958 --> 00:48:21,000 Took the words right out of my mouth. 668 00:48:22,458 --> 00:48:24,708 See you later, Mr. Earp. 669 00:48:29,625 --> 00:48:31,708 All right, move. 670 00:48:35,750 --> 00:48:36,875 Oink, oink. 671 00:48:38,625 --> 00:48:41,333 Here, piggy, piggy, piggy- 672 00:48:44,250 --> 00:48:46,292 Here, piggy, piggy, piggy- 673 00:49:07,250 --> 00:49:08,583 Hey! 674 00:49:15,792 --> 00:49:17,792 I doubt whether I'll ever use this thing in anger. 675 00:49:17,833 --> 00:49:20,333 I don't think it would be pleasant. 676 00:49:20,625 --> 00:49:23,000 Who knows? Maybe the black panthers will come to town. 677 00:49:23,292 --> 00:49:25,542 Lassiter, you been watching too much TV. 678 00:49:25,833 --> 00:49:27,250 Yeah, maybe. 679 00:49:31,958 --> 00:49:34,559 Come on, we better get going. We got the speed numbers this afternoon. 680 00:49:34,583 --> 00:49:35,875 I'll bring the cards. 681 00:49:39,458 --> 00:49:40,667 That's gin. 682 00:49:41,292 --> 00:49:42,333 Gin? 683 00:49:43,458 --> 00:49:44,833 God damn it. 684 00:49:45,125 --> 00:49:46,167 Well, lucky in love. 685 00:49:46,458 --> 00:49:47,750 Yeah, sure. 686 00:49:48,042 --> 00:49:49,442 Must be going through my new cycle. 687 00:49:49,667 --> 00:49:50,833 Cycle? 688 00:49:51,125 --> 00:49:52,917 Yeah, people's lives, they move in cycles. 689 00:49:53,208 --> 00:49:56,792 - It's like uh... the stars. - Oh, astrology. 690 00:49:57,083 --> 00:49:59,292 Right. What's the matter? You don't believe it, right? 691 00:49:59,583 --> 00:50:03,250 Everything in life has cycles and seasons. Like my marriage. 692 00:50:03,542 --> 00:50:07,333 I came out here from New York city. Met this girl. She lived over here. 693 00:50:07,625 --> 00:50:10,375 Said I'd settle down, nice place to raise children. 694 00:50:10,667 --> 00:50:12,667 And five years later, everything turns to shit. 695 00:50:12,958 --> 00:50:15,750 She runs away with a liquor salesman. 696 00:50:16,042 --> 00:50:18,000 Goes back to New York and I stay here. 697 00:50:19,667 --> 00:50:22,417 Oh, maybe you're due for a new cycle. 698 00:50:22,708 --> 00:50:24,917 I sure hope so. Eight... nine. 699 00:50:25,208 --> 00:50:26,417 A new woman. 700 00:50:26,708 --> 00:50:28,333 Ten. Yeah, new woman. 701 00:50:44,792 --> 00:50:46,542 Jesus Christ. 702 00:50:47,917 --> 00:50:49,667 Son of a bitch is flying. 703 00:50:49,958 --> 00:50:50,958 Get after that guy. 704 00:51:06,958 --> 00:51:09,708 Okay, would you... would you watch out? 705 00:51:18,292 --> 00:51:21,000 Don't lose him. Don't lose that man, I want his ass. 706 00:51:21,292 --> 00:51:22,452 Turn it. Turn it. Right here. 707 00:51:22,583 --> 00:51:25,042 Let's get on that son of a bitch. Don't lose him. 708 00:51:25,333 --> 00:51:27,208 Shut up, Lassiter. Just shut up. 709 00:51:38,458 --> 00:51:40,583 God damn it, O'Neil. 710 00:51:40,875 --> 00:51:42,917 Asshole. Move that car onto the road. 711 00:51:45,042 --> 00:51:46,362 Watch out for the tree. 712 00:51:46,458 --> 00:51:48,375 I see the tree. Thank you. 713 00:51:55,625 --> 00:51:58,042 You, pull it over. Pull it over. 714 00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:14,351 All right. Get out of the car. 715 00:52:14,375 --> 00:52:15,851 Hey, don't bullshit with me, man. 716 00:52:15,875 --> 00:52:17,875 It's not bullshit. Get out of that car. 717 00:52:25,167 --> 00:52:27,047 All right, we are going to have to take you in. 718 00:52:28,167 --> 00:52:30,375 Here, will 50 make it all right? 719 00:52:30,667 --> 00:52:31,667 How about 100? 720 00:52:31,958 --> 00:52:33,798 Listen, we almost got killed chasing your ass. 721 00:52:33,875 --> 00:52:35,476 Can you drive, miss? We have to take him to the station. 722 00:52:35,500 --> 00:52:36,860 Yeah, I can drive better than him. 723 00:52:36,958 --> 00:52:38,838 All right, you know your constitutional rights? 724 00:52:39,042 --> 00:52:41,500 Damn right I do, you fucking rednecks. 725 00:52:41,792 --> 00:52:43,833 You shut your mouth. You shut your mouth. 726 00:52:46,583 --> 00:52:48,375 Let's move it. 727 00:52:51,167 --> 00:52:53,583 All right, he'll be out in the morning. 728 00:52:53,875 --> 00:52:55,125 You can keep him. 729 00:52:57,375 --> 00:53:00,458 - You know a motel? - Yeah, I know some motels. 730 00:53:04,292 --> 00:53:06,292 Tell me, is it dangerous being a cop? 731 00:53:07,625 --> 00:53:09,417 Well, sure. 732 00:53:10,500 --> 00:53:11,958 Everything is dangerous. 733 00:53:12,958 --> 00:53:14,208 Ever been shot? 734 00:53:16,458 --> 00:53:17,875 Couple of times. 735 00:53:19,292 --> 00:53:21,583 But, you know what is surprising? 736 00:53:21,875 --> 00:53:25,417 The moment death is near, you don't think about it. 737 00:53:26,708 --> 00:53:28,125 You know? 738 00:53:28,417 --> 00:53:30,625 The bullet hits 739 00:53:31,958 --> 00:53:33,458 But you don't feel the pain. 740 00:53:34,417 --> 00:53:36,375 You feel the blood oozing out. 741 00:53:37,917 --> 00:53:41,208 Then maybe you think you might die. 742 00:53:45,000 --> 00:53:46,458 So, you have been shot? 743 00:53:48,458 --> 00:53:49,917 I don't like to talk about it. 744 00:53:50,208 --> 00:53:51,375 Show me the scars. 745 00:53:51,667 --> 00:53:54,000 - What for? - Because, I wanna see them. 746 00:53:55,125 --> 00:53:56,708 I mean, did they get you there? 747 00:53:58,542 --> 00:54:00,042 Or do they get you there? 748 00:54:01,542 --> 00:54:02,958 Everywhere. 749 00:54:03,250 --> 00:54:04,500 It was a machine gun. 750 00:54:06,167 --> 00:54:07,708 You're bullshitting me. 751 00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:09,958 Why would I lie about a thing like that? 752 00:54:14,667 --> 00:54:16,792 Well, I think I'd better be going. 753 00:54:20,458 --> 00:54:22,125 Oh, the boy scout. 754 00:54:24,292 --> 00:54:26,417 Well, listen, honey, 755 00:54:26,708 --> 00:54:28,875 you are not really my type. 756 00:54:29,167 --> 00:54:30,625 Or I'm not your type. 757 00:54:31,583 --> 00:54:33,542 Now, how do you know that? 758 00:54:33,833 --> 00:54:36,458 Well, cops like me are strictly 759 00:54:36,750 --> 00:54:38,917 low life, street people. 760 00:54:39,792 --> 00:54:42,250 You, uh... you are uptown. 761 00:54:43,042 --> 00:54:44,833 And you are conning me. 762 00:54:46,250 --> 00:54:47,917 Well, I'll take a beer with me. 763 00:54:48,208 --> 00:54:49,500 I've never balled a cop. 764 00:54:50,500 --> 00:54:51,917 Don't brag. 765 00:54:52,208 --> 00:54:53,542 I have balled musicians 766 00:54:54,458 --> 00:54:55,708 and actors 767 00:54:56,625 --> 00:54:59,375 and doctors and lawyers 768 00:54:59,667 --> 00:55:01,958 and even psychiatrists, but never a cop. 769 00:55:05,375 --> 00:55:07,333 Okay, what now? 770 00:55:08,583 --> 00:55:10,083 Take your clothes off. 771 00:55:15,958 --> 00:55:18,083 I have got a better idea. 772 00:55:18,375 --> 00:55:19,875 Take my clothes off. 773 00:55:24,750 --> 00:55:26,542 Come on. Make it snappy. 774 00:55:31,958 --> 00:55:34,167 I really have to be going. 775 00:55:34,458 --> 00:55:36,708 I'm the queen of the one night stands. 776 00:55:37,458 --> 00:55:39,583 Mmm. 777 00:55:39,875 --> 00:55:42,750 I'll give you a quarter for the vibra-bed? 778 00:55:43,042 --> 00:55:45,542 That isn't necessary. 779 00:55:45,833 --> 00:55:50,000 If you touch me in the right place, I'll vibrate at the same speed. 780 00:55:50,292 --> 00:55:52,958 Oh, that's cute. That's very cute. 781 00:55:55,042 --> 00:55:57,375 Look, you either tell me what I wanna know 782 00:55:57,667 --> 00:55:59,627 or you are going to have to deal with my partner. 783 00:55:59,792 --> 00:56:01,542 And he is very mean. 784 00:56:01,833 --> 00:56:03,542 Now, I'm a nice guy. 785 00:56:04,750 --> 00:56:06,417 Friendly. 786 00:56:06,708 --> 00:56:07,792 See, smiling. 787 00:56:10,458 --> 00:56:12,917 I can get rough if you force me to. 788 00:56:13,208 --> 00:56:16,750 - Can I get to my cell? - I'm not through you yet, turkeyhead. 789 00:56:19,833 --> 00:56:23,917 Now, you're in a lot of trouble whether you know it or not. 790 00:56:24,208 --> 00:56:27,167 Your whole life is in jeopardy, whether you know it or not. 791 00:56:28,875 --> 00:56:32,167 Now, you either tell me what I wanna know 792 00:56:32,458 --> 00:56:35,583 or I'm gonna send you up to a place where they have to pipe in sunshine. 793 00:56:35,875 --> 00:56:36,917 According to the Geneva... 794 00:56:37,208 --> 00:56:39,708 Geneva is not in this country, fruit cake. 795 00:56:57,625 --> 00:57:00,167 It's about time we make a hit or something. 796 00:57:00,458 --> 00:57:02,750 - What then? - Go up to Tahoe. 797 00:57:03,042 --> 00:57:04,625 Yeah. 798 00:57:06,833 --> 00:57:08,417 You know, bennie? 799 00:57:08,708 --> 00:57:10,083 You're getting gun happy. 800 00:57:34,417 --> 00:57:36,875 Hey, that's illegal. 801 00:57:37,167 --> 00:57:38,833 What are you trying to do there? 802 00:57:39,125 --> 00:57:40,125 Hey, it's the old timer! 803 00:57:40,375 --> 00:57:42,583 - Hey, old timer. - Hey, that's illegal. 804 00:57:42,875 --> 00:57:44,250 You getting any? 805 00:57:44,542 --> 00:57:46,125 Hey, you know what he's doing? 806 00:57:46,417 --> 00:57:48,518 He is trying to break into my friend's vending machine. 807 00:57:48,542 --> 00:57:50,417 That's illegal, isn't it? 808 00:57:50,708 --> 00:57:53,875 You listen... what the heck? 809 00:57:55,625 --> 00:57:58,333 Hey, Bennie, let's play a little catch. 810 00:58:02,542 --> 00:58:05,167 Now, you give me my... Now, you give me my bottle. 811 00:58:06,792 --> 00:58:10,125 You know, I think about Vera a lot. 812 00:58:11,500 --> 00:58:12,708 Vera. 813 00:58:13,000 --> 00:58:14,792 - The girl at the... - Zoo. 814 00:58:16,458 --> 00:58:17,583 Well, uh... 815 00:58:17,875 --> 00:58:19,708 She doesn't really strike me as the type 816 00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:23,042 that cooks and sits around the house with your pipe and slippers. 817 00:58:23,333 --> 00:58:24,417 But who is? 818 00:58:31,542 --> 00:58:33,417 Get him up. 819 00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:42,375 Stop this shit. 820 00:58:43,958 --> 00:58:45,583 Hey, cut the shit. 821 00:58:47,292 --> 00:58:48,875 Get the hell outta here. 822 00:58:50,125 --> 00:58:52,042 Die. Come on, move it. 823 00:59:03,375 --> 00:59:06,250 What I'm trying to say is, uh... 824 00:59:06,542 --> 00:59:09,500 Look, I know it sounds like a cliche but... 825 00:59:11,250 --> 00:59:13,333 What are you doing working in a place like this? 826 00:59:13,625 --> 00:59:14,917 I enjoy it. 827 00:59:16,250 --> 00:59:18,250 You're just rationalizing now. 828 00:59:18,542 --> 00:59:20,875 Vera, you deserve better than this. 829 00:59:21,167 --> 00:59:25,042 Now, look, I have been watching you for a long time now and... 830 00:59:26,875 --> 00:59:29,708 I'm really attracted to you. 831 00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:33,292 I know I never said anything about it till now but... 832 00:59:33,583 --> 00:59:36,542 Now that things are going a little better for me, 833 00:59:36,833 --> 00:59:40,167 I just, uh, I thought, I'd be needing a woman. 834 00:59:40,458 --> 00:59:42,792 Someone who cares, someone who wants a... 835 00:59:43,083 --> 00:59:45,167 What are you talking about? A wife? 836 00:59:46,500 --> 00:59:49,917 - Huh? - Just slow down, Vera. 837 00:59:50,208 --> 00:59:52,958 Let me, uh, let me say it my way. 838 00:59:54,958 --> 00:59:57,042 You see, uh, I'm... I'm action-orientated. 839 00:59:58,667 --> 01:00:00,542 I find it very hard to talk. 840 01:00:01,500 --> 01:00:03,583 You want some action? 841 01:00:03,875 --> 01:00:05,917 Or you just trying to talk me to death? 842 01:00:07,833 --> 01:00:09,458 What are you talking about? 843 01:00:13,458 --> 01:00:14,583 Belly to belly. 844 01:00:16,125 --> 01:00:18,292 This is off the record but, uh, 845 01:00:19,792 --> 01:00:21,333 I'm on duty. 846 01:00:35,875 --> 01:00:37,917 Come on, get in. 847 01:00:38,208 --> 01:00:40,375 Careful of my feet. 848 01:00:40,667 --> 01:00:43,000 I feel very sensitive... I got sensitive feet. 849 01:00:53,833 --> 01:00:55,917 I think I'm coming into my new cycle. 850 01:01:19,833 --> 01:01:23,000 - It's okay, old man. - He got my bottle. 851 01:01:23,292 --> 01:01:25,000 Who did it? 852 01:01:25,292 --> 01:01:28,333 The gorillas are mean, you know that? They are mean and hairy. 853 01:01:30,125 --> 01:01:31,750 I'll get an ambulance. Hold on. 854 01:01:32,042 --> 01:01:33,917 Oh, Howard! Howard! 855 01:01:38,708 --> 01:01:41,875 Rooster, yeah, O'Neil here. 856 01:01:42,167 --> 01:01:45,125 Can we get an ambulance down to the quick car wash? 857 01:01:45,417 --> 01:01:46,583 Thanks. 858 01:02:12,500 --> 01:02:14,500 Hello, sweetheart. 859 01:02:14,792 --> 01:02:16,417 Where you going? 860 01:02:16,708 --> 01:02:17,917 You all by yourself? 861 01:02:21,292 --> 01:02:23,333 Here, pussy, pussy. 862 01:02:49,958 --> 01:02:51,083 Hi. 863 01:02:53,208 --> 01:02:54,792 How you doing? 864 01:02:55,083 --> 01:02:56,333 Just fine. 865 01:02:57,792 --> 01:02:59,667 Wanna go to a party? 866 01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:02,400 No, thank you. I really have to go. 867 01:03:02,583 --> 01:03:04,500 How about spending some time with us? 868 01:03:05,792 --> 01:03:07,208 No, I really do have to get home. 869 01:03:07,500 --> 01:03:10,250 Oh, come on. It's party time. We wanna have a little party. 870 01:03:12,292 --> 01:03:13,652 - You want a drink? - No, thank you. 871 01:03:13,875 --> 01:03:15,125 Let's talk about it. 872 01:03:17,458 --> 01:03:19,500 Sit here and talk about it. 873 01:03:22,958 --> 01:03:26,125 - Please, come on, you guys. - Let's go over here and talk about it. 874 01:03:28,708 --> 01:03:30,250 Come on, sweetie. 875 01:03:32,167 --> 01:03:34,042 Come on, please. 876 01:03:37,625 --> 01:03:40,750 Sure you wouldn't like to have a little drink with us? 877 01:03:41,042 --> 01:03:42,250 Come on. 878 01:03:43,000 --> 01:03:44,417 No, thank you. 879 01:03:47,167 --> 01:03:49,167 Let's you and me do some talking. 880 01:03:54,500 --> 01:03:57,625 I promise, we are not going to hurt ya. 881 01:03:57,917 --> 01:04:00,167 - Oh, come on, please. - Hold on, stay right here. 882 01:04:01,958 --> 01:04:04,500 Now, I wouldn't wanna break your ribs. 883 01:04:04,792 --> 01:04:05,917 Oh, please. 884 01:04:06,208 --> 01:04:07,667 I mean, you can stay right here. 885 01:04:07,958 --> 01:04:09,598 I can't let you go. What will they think? 886 01:04:11,708 --> 01:04:15,708 I need you to stay right here, we're gonna do a little bit of talking. 887 01:04:18,625 --> 01:04:21,583 Oh! I'm sorry. 888 01:04:28,708 --> 01:04:29,875 Please. 889 01:04:30,167 --> 01:04:32,083 Please don't. 890 01:04:35,167 --> 01:04:38,167 Here, let me make you a little more comfortable. 891 01:04:41,292 --> 01:04:43,625 No! 892 01:04:45,125 --> 01:04:47,167 Please don't. Please. 893 01:04:47,458 --> 01:04:49,708 - I'll try not to hurt you... - Please don't. 894 01:04:50,000 --> 01:04:51,083 You give in. 895 01:04:51,375 --> 01:04:53,125 Please don't. 896 01:05:14,708 --> 01:05:15,708 No. 897 01:05:16,708 --> 01:05:18,750 Please, don't. 898 01:05:22,958 --> 01:05:24,417 Please don't. 899 01:05:57,792 --> 01:05:59,417 Son of a bitch. 900 01:06:40,458 --> 01:06:41,917 Just a little kiss. 901 01:06:43,833 --> 01:06:45,333 No. 902 01:06:46,375 --> 01:06:48,083 Just wanna make love to you. 903 01:06:49,708 --> 01:06:51,083 I'll be nice to you. 904 01:07:26,375 --> 01:07:28,333 Let me get to you. 905 01:07:30,583 --> 01:07:32,083 No. 906 01:08:22,375 --> 01:08:24,333 You're pretty quiet today, Lassiter. 907 01:08:25,333 --> 01:08:26,542 Yeah. 908 01:08:28,167 --> 01:08:29,750 I think I'm in love. 909 01:08:30,792 --> 01:08:32,958 Something happened last night? 910 01:08:33,250 --> 01:08:36,375 Yeah, something very important happened to me last night. 911 01:08:36,667 --> 01:08:38,208 Well, that makes two of us. 912 01:08:38,958 --> 01:08:40,250 That Vera. 913 01:08:41,625 --> 01:08:43,375 She is a lot of woman. 914 01:08:44,917 --> 01:08:46,042 Yeah. 915 01:08:47,792 --> 01:08:50,083 Well, you missed a lot of action last night. 916 01:08:50,375 --> 01:08:51,667 No, I, uh... 917 01:08:51,958 --> 01:08:55,167 I didn't miss any action last night. 918 01:08:55,458 --> 01:08:59,333 Well, you tell me about your night and I'll tell you about mine. 919 01:08:59,625 --> 01:09:01,625 I think you're a little young for that. 920 01:09:06,625 --> 01:09:08,125 Jesus, it's hot already. 921 01:09:14,792 --> 01:09:16,833 Ah, goddamn boots. 922 01:09:22,292 --> 01:09:25,042 Hey, Bennie, what you doing out there? 923 01:09:28,708 --> 01:09:29,875 Tonight's the night. 924 01:09:34,125 --> 01:09:35,917 I think we oughta move out. 925 01:09:36,208 --> 01:09:37,417 I ain't through. 926 01:09:38,125 --> 01:09:39,333 Me neither. 927 01:09:40,625 --> 01:09:42,125 That girl could have talked. 928 01:09:42,417 --> 01:09:43,542 So what? 929 01:09:43,833 --> 01:09:45,083 She wouldn't talk. 930 01:09:45,375 --> 01:09:47,000 She loved you. 931 01:09:51,125 --> 01:09:54,083 You didn't do so bad yourself. 932 01:09:54,375 --> 01:10:01,000 That cafe, it could have in it 2000, maybe 3000. 933 01:10:01,292 --> 01:10:03,917 I still think we ought to move out. 934 01:10:04,208 --> 01:10:05,667 You ain't afraid of the cops? 935 01:10:33,125 --> 01:10:36,250 Oh, uh, listen, not tonight, Ruby. 936 01:10:36,542 --> 01:10:39,500 It's all right. I didn't come over here for that. 937 01:10:39,792 --> 01:10:41,208 Okay. Come on in. 938 01:10:47,625 --> 01:10:49,333 - You have a beer? - Sure. 939 01:10:59,333 --> 01:11:00,792 Jimmy. 940 01:11:12,708 --> 01:11:15,917 I haven't been too much fun these days. 941 01:11:16,208 --> 01:11:17,958 Ever since old bill got beaten up. 942 01:11:24,292 --> 01:11:27,292 - Those three guys at the cafe. - Yeah? 943 01:11:30,333 --> 01:11:32,958 I was coming home the other night... 944 01:11:36,125 --> 01:11:38,042 And they, uh... 945 01:11:42,458 --> 01:11:45,125 And they grabbed me in the alley, 946 01:11:45,417 --> 01:11:47,708 and they threw me against the wall. 947 01:11:53,292 --> 01:11:55,208 And they raped me. 948 01:11:55,500 --> 01:11:57,667 All three of them, they raped me. 949 01:11:59,458 --> 01:12:01,500 And I couldn't do anything. 950 01:12:03,583 --> 01:12:05,292 I couldn't do anything. 951 01:12:06,625 --> 01:12:09,292 Oh, it's okay. It's okay. 952 01:12:09,583 --> 01:12:11,500 Why didn't you say anything to me? 953 01:12:20,667 --> 01:12:22,750 'Cause I was scared. 954 01:12:32,792 --> 01:12:35,083 They said they were going to kill me. 955 01:12:36,792 --> 01:12:39,375 And I believe them. And... 956 01:12:45,333 --> 01:12:47,000 And I was ashamed. 957 01:12:49,625 --> 01:12:52,208 I was ashamed. 958 01:13:04,333 --> 01:13:06,417 I wish you'd have told me about it. 959 01:13:16,083 --> 01:13:19,042 I don't think about you like a real cop anyway. 960 01:13:23,125 --> 01:13:25,792 Bullshit. I could've helped you. 961 01:13:53,458 --> 01:13:55,042 Damn it, O'Neil. 962 01:14:08,958 --> 01:14:10,708 You're beginning to bore me. 963 01:14:15,417 --> 01:14:17,875 Did you all of a sudden turn fag or something? 964 01:14:18,750 --> 01:14:20,167 No. 965 01:14:21,708 --> 01:14:24,333 I just have a few things to think about. 966 01:14:25,625 --> 01:14:27,917 O'Neil, I want you to leave. 967 01:14:28,208 --> 01:14:30,583 Put your uniform on and get out of here. 968 01:14:30,875 --> 01:14:34,417 And don't come back here till you get yourjuices flowing. 969 01:14:34,708 --> 01:14:36,500 Hi, officer O'Neil. 970 01:14:36,792 --> 01:14:38,917 Oh, could I have some aspirin please? 971 01:14:39,208 --> 01:14:42,292 Sure. You want large, economy, giant, or family size? 972 01:14:42,583 --> 01:14:45,625 Just some aspirin. Small. 973 01:14:45,917 --> 01:14:48,042 Okay, they're right there in front of you. 974 01:14:55,375 --> 01:14:56,750 Okay. 975 01:14:57,042 --> 01:14:58,562 You're a friend of Mary's, aren't you? 976 01:14:59,458 --> 01:15:00,708 Well, I know her. 977 01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:02,458 I'm Judy. 978 01:15:02,750 --> 01:15:05,417 Mary told me all about you. 979 01:15:05,708 --> 01:15:07,583 Well, I'm a good friend and... 980 01:15:09,125 --> 01:15:10,542 You understand. 981 01:15:19,833 --> 01:15:21,625 Hello. 982 01:15:21,917 --> 01:15:23,250 Oh, hi, Lisa. How are you? 983 01:15:23,542 --> 01:15:24,542 Good. 984 01:15:24,708 --> 01:15:25,833 That's great. 985 01:15:29,208 --> 01:15:33,500 Um, I've been thinking, 986 01:15:33,792 --> 01:15:37,333 and I'd really like to apologize for being so bitchy. 987 01:15:37,625 --> 01:15:39,583 I think I was wrong about you. 988 01:15:41,458 --> 01:15:43,178 No, you should follow your first instincts. 989 01:15:46,458 --> 01:15:47,500 I like you. 990 01:15:49,875 --> 01:15:51,292 You were right about me. 991 01:15:53,208 --> 01:15:57,042 I mean, look, I was in the army, 992 01:15:57,333 --> 01:16:00,250 and I saw all the killing and the crap. 993 01:16:00,542 --> 01:16:02,083 And I didn't like it. 994 01:16:02,375 --> 01:16:05,083 And I came to this town and I got a job, 995 01:16:05,375 --> 01:16:07,375 and I just wanted to enjoy myself, you know? 996 01:16:08,875 --> 01:16:10,750 Well, it's all gone sour. 997 01:16:13,167 --> 01:16:16,958 I mean, I have no commitment to my job, 998 01:16:17,250 --> 01:16:20,375 I have no commitment to the people I work with. 999 01:16:20,667 --> 01:16:23,208 I don't even have any commitment to the people I like. 1000 01:16:25,750 --> 01:16:27,292 No commitment. 1001 01:16:27,583 --> 01:16:30,708 So, listen, I mean... You're a very nice girl. 1002 01:16:32,542 --> 01:16:35,208 But I just don't know how to deal with you right now. 1003 01:16:41,333 --> 01:16:42,875 Look, I'll see you around. 1004 01:16:53,583 --> 01:16:55,708 Well, that's it. 1005 01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:57,708 I told 'em today I'm going to quit. 1006 01:16:59,625 --> 01:17:02,375 - You sure? - Positive. 1007 01:17:02,667 --> 01:17:04,417 I called a friend of mine at the LAPD. 1008 01:17:04,708 --> 01:17:06,750 Says he's going to check some things out for me. 1009 01:17:07,042 --> 01:17:08,083 You ought to get out, too. 1010 01:17:08,375 --> 01:17:10,083 I'm thinking about it. 1011 01:17:10,375 --> 01:17:14,167 Good. I'll have him check out something for you, too. 1012 01:17:15,208 --> 01:17:16,833 No, I mean out. 1013 01:17:17,125 --> 01:17:20,542 - Out? - Out. Police work. 1014 01:17:20,833 --> 01:17:22,793 What's the matter? Somebody kick you in the head? 1015 01:17:23,125 --> 01:17:24,417 Just about. 1016 01:17:35,458 --> 01:17:38,167 Honey, you've been acting blue all night long. 1017 01:17:40,833 --> 01:17:42,750 Just a little. 1018 01:17:43,042 --> 01:17:46,083 Oh, come on, now. Don't look back. 1019 01:17:47,542 --> 01:17:50,000 Pretty girl like you. 1020 01:17:50,292 --> 01:17:52,500 Ain't but three things in the world worth anything, 1021 01:17:52,792 --> 01:17:54,333 that's a good cigar, 1022 01:17:54,625 --> 01:17:57,458 a cool sip of water on a hot summer day, 1023 01:17:57,750 --> 01:17:59,625 and a pretty girl with a smile. 1024 01:17:59,917 --> 01:18:02,042 That's better. 1025 01:18:03,958 --> 01:18:06,750 You ought to write some of that stuff down, Clyde. 1026 01:18:08,125 --> 01:18:10,917 Well, when I get back to 80 1027 01:18:11,208 --> 01:18:13,250 I think I'll write myself a book. 1028 01:18:13,542 --> 01:18:16,875 I'll call it Inside Clyde Good Time Philosophy. 1029 01:18:30,917 --> 01:18:33,333 Oh, gentlemen, tonight you are too late. We are closed. 1030 01:18:33,625 --> 01:18:35,083 That's perfect. 1031 01:18:36,542 --> 01:18:38,333 Hi, honey. 1032 01:18:38,625 --> 01:18:41,042 Lou, check out the place. 1033 01:18:41,333 --> 01:18:42,750 Check the back rooms. 1034 01:18:49,917 --> 01:18:51,458 What's the matter, honey? 1035 01:18:51,750 --> 01:18:54,167 Don't you like what happened the other night? 1036 01:19:07,458 --> 01:19:10,208 Don't go for it, nigger, or I'll blow her head off! 1037 01:19:26,458 --> 01:19:29,417 Get that dumb-ass out of here! 1038 01:19:32,875 --> 01:19:34,000 Now, where's the money? 1039 01:19:36,833 --> 01:19:38,542 I don't know. 1040 01:19:41,625 --> 01:19:42,792 Where is it? 1041 01:19:51,875 --> 01:19:54,083 Find it, god damn it! 1042 01:20:16,500 --> 01:20:18,292 - Hold it. - What? 1043 01:20:19,292 --> 01:20:21,000 Look over at Clyde's. 1044 01:20:23,500 --> 01:20:25,781 Well, the blinds are drawn and the lights are on. 1045 01:20:28,583 --> 01:20:30,167 Let's go over and take a look. 1046 01:20:31,667 --> 01:20:33,042 Anything you say. 1047 01:20:34,833 --> 01:20:37,542 Listen, you go around and cover the back door. 1048 01:20:38,583 --> 01:20:40,542 I'll take my shotgun. 1049 01:21:06,292 --> 01:21:08,792 Where are Clyde and Ruby? 1050 01:21:09,083 --> 01:21:12,333 Just stepped out. Coming back. 1051 01:21:12,625 --> 01:21:15,042 We're kind of watching the place for 'em. 1052 01:21:15,333 --> 01:21:18,625 Well, that's very nice. Seems real neighborly. 1053 01:21:56,792 --> 01:21:58,000 We under arrest? 1054 01:22:01,958 --> 01:22:03,333 Not quite yet. 1055 01:22:08,458 --> 01:22:10,208 I'm hoping you might resist. 1056 01:23:22,708 --> 01:23:23,833 Freeze! 1057 01:26:41,292 --> 01:26:43,500 Oh, Jesus. Look at you. 1058 01:26:47,292 --> 01:26:48,708 O'Neil? 1059 01:26:50,958 --> 01:26:52,750 O'Neil, you all right? 1060 01:26:55,792 --> 01:26:57,292 Ah, you're here. 1061 01:26:59,667 --> 01:27:01,958 Isn't this poetry? 1062 01:27:06,125 --> 01:27:09,833 I'd still rather be making love to you. 1063 01:27:10,292 --> 01:27:11,875 Still. 1064 01:27:29,958 --> 01:27:33,125 Well, I lived. Though I complained a lot. 1065 01:27:36,333 --> 01:27:38,625 I didn't want to be a hero. 1066 01:27:50,083 --> 01:27:54,875 Yup, a cop is usually overworked, underpaid and misunderstood. 1067 01:28:00,875 --> 01:28:02,958 But he ain't never horny. 1068 01:28:05,958 --> 01:28:07,542 How are you feeling? 1069 01:28:09,708 --> 01:28:10,833 Fine. 72045

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