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1
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- Previously on "Web Therapy"...
- That's my name.
2
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I'm still in the Witness Protection.
3
00:00:10,282 --> 00:00:12,449
Yes. Good, oh good.
4
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Still, I'm living in... Montana.
5
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Yes, together with...
6
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- Betsy.
- Betsy.
7
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She doesn't remember anything.
8
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She's got amnesia.
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It's so fantastic. I have my own company.
10
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The name of my company is FEH...
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- Fill EveryHole.
- Oh!
12
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You're gonna be the face of
my biggest-selling product,
13
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the ass spindle.
14
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S04E07
Drink to Forget
15
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sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
16
00:01:07,098 --> 00:01:09,423
- Jerome?
- Dr. Wallice.
17
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What's wrong? What's wrong?
18
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- What happened?
- Thank God you answered.
19
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You look like you've been attacked.
20
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- Do you have a rape kit?
- No.
21
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Okay, well, I...
I think it has gotten to the point
22
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where I can no longer
live safely in my own home
23
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- with Gina here.
- Oh.
24
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The last couple of nights,
I've woken up in different rooms
25
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- of the house.
- Oh.
26
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And last night,
I woke up on the floor of the kitchen
27
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with Jordan Almonds all over me...
28
00:01:37,970 --> 00:01:40,387
- Oh.
- And some of them in me.
29
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Okay, you know what?
I don't know how I can help you.
30
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I don't know what to do.
31
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I'm afraid of what I might have caught.
32
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I'm afraid of the anxiety.
33
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I'm scared of seeing
her around every corner.
34
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- She is a predator.
- Right.
35
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Like, you suspect you're being
36
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roofied and then taken
advantage of by Gina?
37
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And I... I have to tell you,
I feel like we need to stop her.
38
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Right. Well, yeah, maybe.
39
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Well, I don't know what we can do.
40
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She needs to go away.
41
00:02:02,378 --> 00:02:03,961
- She needs help.
- That's what it sounds like.
42
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She needs to go to a...
a... a treatment facility,
43
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or to... to prison.
44
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She needs to stay away from me,
45
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because I can't go through that again.
46
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Right, as much as I don't
believe in sort of, you know,
47
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addiction as a disease,
48
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some of these places are wonderful for just
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sort of putting someone somewhere,
you know,
50
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while everyone else can have a rest.
51
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Yeah. I'm completely dehydrated.
52
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I cannot keep any liquids in me.
53
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Well, you'll have to send her somewhere,
I guess.
54
00:02:25,768 --> 00:02:27,901
Yeah, yeah, I...
I've done a little bit of research,
55
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and most of these sex addiction places,
56
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the...
the interventionists alone cost $10,000.
57
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I... I'm an interventionist.
58
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- You are?
- Of course.
59
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- That I can do.
- Oh, thank God!
60
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- Certainly.
- I had no idea.
61
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Yes, and I... it's, you know,
I think it's worth every penny.
62
00:02:42,785 --> 00:02:44,585
Well, yes, of course, Dr. Wallice, I...
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Except that I'm, you know,
64
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- I've never charged 10,000.
- Oh.
65
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It's always been 15 or more.
66
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Well, that's more than I thought, actually.
67
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Oh, but don't you save on travel?
68
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'Cause you have to fly them,
and you have to put them up.
69
00:02:56,215 --> 00:02:57,798
- Right.
- There's mini-bar charges...
70
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- Right.
- And the room service
71
00:02:59,435 --> 00:03:00,801
- that they run up...
- Sure.
72
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- Their entertainment.
- Right, right, right.
73
00:03:02,688 --> 00:03:03,887
And if they're a man,
74
00:03:03,939 --> 00:03:05,189
they'll wind up sleeping with Gina,
75
00:03:05,224 --> 00:03:06,724
or she'll wind up roofie-ing him,
76
00:03:06,776 --> 00:03:08,058
and then I'll have to pay those damages.
77
00:03:08,110 --> 00:03:09,643
That's worth another, what, 5,000?
78
00:03:09,645 --> 00:03:11,145
- Yeah.
- Which is nothing to you.
79
00:03:11,197 --> 00:03:12,479
- No. You know, okay.
- Right.
80
00:03:12,531 --> 00:03:13,647
- Good point.
- Yes.
81
00:03:13,649 --> 00:03:15,032
- Deal.
- A little angry that you
82
00:03:15,067 --> 00:03:16,817
argued with... over the price.
83
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Honestly, I... I think I'm...
it's the roofie talking.
84
00:03:19,238 --> 00:03:21,038
- Yeah.
- I mean, I'm clearly not...
85
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I don't... in my own...
I'm not in my own mind, you know?
86
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You can't even form a sentence.
87
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- Not even.
- Why don't you go get Gina?
88
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I'll get Gina.
Thank you so much, Dr. Wallice.
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00:03:29,081 --> 00:03:32,416
Um, Gina? Gina, love?
90
00:03:32,468 --> 00:03:34,468
- Stop yelling at me!
- Oh, I'm sorry, honey.
91
00:03:34,503 --> 00:03:36,253
- Fiona...
- Stop yelling at me.
92
00:03:36,305 --> 00:03:37,971
Dr. Wallice wants to talk to you,
93
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if you don't mind coming to talk to her.
94
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I love her, I love her.
95
00:03:40,843 --> 00:03:42,393
- Wow, there's a lot of them.
- Hi!
96
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Just, don't...
come on, sit in your own chair.
97
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Don't sit on my lap. I love you, Fiona.
98
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- Okay, you're too close.
- Hello, Gina.
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Hi. Cheers.
100
00:03:50,019 --> 00:03:51,852
Oh, no more of that.
That's... what is that?
101
00:03:51,904 --> 00:03:53,654
- Oh, you're drinking...
- Smells like... no.
102
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- Champagne in the morning?
- That's all right.
103
00:03:55,274 --> 00:03:56,774
No more of that. Is that a good idea?
104
00:03:56,826 --> 00:03:58,909
- That's not champagne.
- It's a Mimosa.
105
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Oh. Okay.
106
00:04:00,529 --> 00:04:01,912
You know what, Gina, Jerome
107
00:04:01,947 --> 00:04:04,114
and I were just talking
about something that...
108
00:04:04,166 --> 00:04:06,533
it seems that you've been working so hard
109
00:04:06,535 --> 00:04:08,585
- at your business...
- Mm-hmm.
110
00:04:08,621 --> 00:04:11,538
And with the construction
workers that you need a break.
111
00:04:11,590 --> 00:04:12,840
- Yeah.
- I do.
112
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So we decided we are sending you...
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- On a vacation.
- On a vacation
114
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to a sex anon clinic... Mmhmm.
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In Mystic Hills, Nevada.
116
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- No way!
- Yes!
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Yeah, you're gonna finally...
118
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- you're welcome.
- Thank you.
119
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- Is it like camp?
- Yes.
120
00:04:31,811 --> 00:04:33,527
- Are drinks included?
- Yes.
121
00:04:33,562 --> 00:04:34,895
- Mm-hmm.
- It's all-inclusive?
122
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You're gonna get all the help you need.
123
00:04:36,449 --> 00:04:38,198
- It's all-inclusive.
- And guess what?
124
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I already packed your bags.
125
00:04:39,702 --> 00:04:41,068
- I love you!
- Oh, you did?
126
00:04:41,070 --> 00:04:42,486
- You packed already for her?
- I love you.
127
00:04:42,538 --> 00:04:44,037
Two weeks ago. Two weeks ago.
128
00:04:44,073 --> 00:04:45,038
- Oh.
- Yeah. When this...
129
00:04:45,074 --> 00:04:46,457
So, all right, great.
130
00:04:46,492 --> 00:04:48,208
So here's what I think you should do.
131
00:04:48,244 --> 00:04:51,962
While I've made the reservation,
I still need confirmation.
132
00:04:51,997 --> 00:04:53,464
So why don't you head to the airport?
133
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- I love you so much.
- It'll be fun,
134
00:04:55,084 --> 00:04:57,000
- like a treasure hunt.
- Is it like Mexico?
135
00:04:57,052 --> 00:04:59,303
Nevada's a lot like Mexico.
136
00:04:59,338 --> 00:05:01,839
I mean,
most people don't know the difference.
137
00:05:07,763 --> 00:05:09,263
Oh. That's... Betsy.
138
00:05:09,315 --> 00:05:10,764
Oh, hello, yeah.
139
00:05:10,766 --> 00:05:12,099
- Betsy?
- Hi.
140
00:05:12,151 --> 00:05:15,769
Hi, come on over and talk to Fiona.
141
00:05:15,771 --> 00:05:17,688
She's crazy as a bedbug.
142
00:05:17,740 --> 00:05:19,773
- Oh, okay.
- Who's the pretty lady?
143
00:05:19,825 --> 00:05:21,024
That's... that's Fiona.
144
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You know Fiona.
145
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- I know Fiona?
- Yes.
146
00:05:25,915 --> 00:05:26,830
- Hi.
- Hello.
147
00:05:26,866 --> 00:05:27,998
- Hi.
- This is...
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It's me, Fiona.
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Hi, Fiona.
150
00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:33,086
Hey, do you... do you remember me?
151
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Do I look familiar to you at all?
152
00:05:35,291 --> 00:05:37,040
Does she look familiar to me at all?
153
00:05:37,092 --> 00:05:38,842
- Well, she's asking you that.
- No, I'm asking you.
154
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I'm asking you that.
155
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No, but you're very, very pretty,
156
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and I like your shiny hair.
157
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- It is very pretty.
- Right.
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Well, when you see a good color job...
159
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When it's well-done...
160
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What are we doing?
161
00:05:50,806 --> 00:05:53,273
We're just...
well, we're just gonna have a chat.
162
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- I love chatting.
- Just to see... really?
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So can I ask you something, Betsy?
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You don't remember him at all?
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That's your husband.
166
00:06:02,117 --> 00:06:05,819
No, but I'd marry him,
'cause he seems wonderful.
167
00:06:05,871 --> 00:06:07,988
He is. He's very nice,
and you have a child.
168
00:06:07,990 --> 00:06:10,541
- That's not like her.
- We have a child?
169
00:06:10,576 --> 00:06:12,826
- I love children.
- You didn't see the baby?
170
00:06:12,878 --> 00:06:14,127
- You have a baby.
- I sh...
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00:06:14,163 --> 00:06:15,829
Oh, the brown baby upstairs?
172
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He's so cute. Did you see that baby?
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- That's our baby.
- Yes, you named him Tyrone.
174
00:06:21,670 --> 00:06:22,669
Oh, what a nice name.
175
00:06:22,721 --> 00:06:24,254
Yeah, after your former lover.
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Oh, that was so nice of me.
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He must have been flattered.
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00:06:28,177 --> 00:06:30,010
He doesn't know.
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00:06:30,062 --> 00:06:32,012
And I don't think he was
technically your lover.
180
00:06:32,014 --> 00:06:34,815
I'm not seeing a break or a
crack in the facade at all,
181
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:36,850
if this is one. Wow.
182
00:06:36,852 --> 00:06:38,068
She sounds really smart.
183
00:06:38,103 --> 00:06:39,653
Are you the president?
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00:06:39,688 --> 00:06:42,689
Yes,
I'm the president of the United States.
185
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- Wow!
- Nice to meet you.
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00:06:44,159 --> 00:06:46,026
Now I'm intimidated.
187
00:06:46,028 --> 00:06:48,362
- Fiona, don't tease her.
- I can't help it.
188
00:06:48,364 --> 00:06:50,197
This is ludicrous. You know...
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00:06:50,199 --> 00:06:52,783
Well, it's not ludicrous.
She's lost her mind.
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00:06:52,835 --> 00:06:56,336
Well, let's see if she has or she hasn't,
okay?
191
00:06:56,372 --> 00:06:58,755
So, um, I don't know if you know this,
192
00:06:58,791 --> 00:07:02,426
but your husband and I
have a history together.
193
00:07:02,461 --> 00:07:03,710
We go way back.
194
00:07:03,762 --> 00:07:04,795
You do?
195
00:07:04,847 --> 00:07:06,096
- Yes.
- That's nice.
196
00:07:06,131 --> 00:07:08,348
We've been intimately involved.
197
00:07:08,384 --> 00:07:10,300
Oh, he's so handsome, isn't he?
198
00:07:10,352 --> 00:07:11,685
- Yes, he is.
- Fiona...
199
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:13,770
- he's very handsome.
- You...
200
00:07:13,806 --> 00:07:15,722
And we're in love.
201
00:07:15,724 --> 00:07:18,058
Oh, that is so terrific.
202
00:07:18,110 --> 00:07:19,977
- I love love.
- Right.
203
00:07:20,029 --> 00:07:24,565
So you're fine if your husband and I...
204
00:07:24,617 --> 00:07:26,650
- go off together and...
- Oh, sounds fun.
205
00:07:26,702 --> 00:07:28,235
We're going to go off somewhere.
206
00:07:28,237 --> 00:07:32,289
We're going to have sex a lot.
207
00:07:32,324 --> 00:07:33,907
That sounds really great.
208
00:07:33,909 --> 00:07:36,159
- It sounds really great.
- You should do that.
209
00:07:36,211 --> 00:07:37,711
- I want to.
- Okay.
210
00:07:37,746 --> 00:07:40,581
- I want to do that, Fiona.
- How can I help?
211
00:07:40,583 --> 00:07:43,250
- What if I moved in?
- That would be great!
212
00:07:43,302 --> 00:07:45,135
But we're in the witness
protection program.
213
00:07:45,170 --> 00:07:46,887
- No, I've worked... I know.
- We can't.
214
00:07:46,922 --> 00:07:48,589
Yes, no, I understand.
215
00:07:48,641 --> 00:07:50,340
But I would like for you to come here.
216
00:07:50,392 --> 00:07:51,758
I'm trying to test...
I'm testing something,
217
00:07:51,810 --> 00:07:53,510
- because...
- She's gonna come visit.
218
00:07:53,562 --> 00:07:55,762
The Robin I know would never
want me within 10 feet of her.
219
00:07:55,764 --> 00:07:57,431
You cannot say...
220
00:07:57,433 --> 00:07:59,099
you cannot say...
all right, the Betsy I know.
221
00:07:59,151 --> 00:08:02,069
Shh! I hear birds.
222
00:08:02,104 --> 00:08:04,688
That's Tyrone... crying.
223
00:08:04,740 --> 00:08:06,239
Oh, so you need to go get the baby.
224
00:08:06,275 --> 00:08:08,108
I'm gonna hang up. I'm sorry,
225
00:08:08,110 --> 00:08:10,110
but I can't help you, Jacques.
Are you coming to visit?
226
00:08:10,162 --> 00:08:12,079
All right? I know she's up to something,
227
00:08:12,114 --> 00:08:13,447
but I can't prove it.
228
00:08:13,449 --> 00:08:18,085
All right, good-bye. No. No, no, no.
229
00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:19,202
Ugh.
230
00:08:19,254 --> 00:08:21,254
I said I can't help.
231
00:08:21,290 --> 00:08:23,957
- Hi. I missed you.
- Uh-oh.
232
00:08:23,959 --> 00:08:25,792
What's your name?
233
00:08:25,844 --> 00:08:27,044
Uh-oh.
234
00:08:32,968 --> 00:08:34,301
Hello. No, I'm here.
235
00:08:34,303 --> 00:08:36,970
- You got me.
- Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
236
00:08:36,972 --> 00:08:38,105
I've...
237
00:08:38,140 --> 00:08:39,473
I've never, uh,
238
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,975
this is... you are right there.
There you are.
239
00:08:41,977 --> 00:08:45,362
No, it's a wonderful way of...
of doing therapy.
240
00:08:45,397 --> 00:08:47,230
Well, I... I... I would imagine.
241
00:08:47,282 --> 00:08:49,449
This is my first time, so I'm... I'm...
242
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:52,235
You don't have to leave the
comfort of you lovely home.
243
00:08:52,287 --> 00:08:53,987
Yes, well, it's not my home. This is...
244
00:08:54,039 --> 00:08:55,956
I'm actually the headmistress of a girls'
school,
245
00:08:55,991 --> 00:08:58,291
- the Frick School for girls.
- The Frick School?
246
00:08:58,327 --> 00:09:00,127
- Oh, I've heard of that.
- Oh, you have?
247
00:09:00,162 --> 00:09:02,913
Oh, I really wanted to attend
that school when I was young.
248
00:09:02,965 --> 00:09:04,498
Yes, it's a very, you know...
249
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:06,383
it's an elite school for... exclusive, yes.
250
00:09:06,418 --> 00:09:09,002
Very exclusive, and lovely school.
251
00:09:09,004 --> 00:09:12,472
I've been the headmistress here
for nigh on 25 years, so...
252
00:09:12,508 --> 00:09:14,891
Oh, my goodness, and Frick, so, is it?
253
00:09:14,927 --> 00:09:16,560
That's my father.
254
00:09:16,595 --> 00:09:19,062
Yes, he founded the school
back in the early '50s.
255
00:09:19,098 --> 00:09:20,764
- Wow.
- And groomed me to take over
256
00:09:20,816 --> 00:09:23,183
for him,
and it's really been my life's work.
257
00:09:23,185 --> 00:09:25,852
I'm just a leader of girls, you know.
258
00:09:25,854 --> 00:09:27,187
- Wow.
- So...
259
00:09:27,189 --> 00:09:28,939
Yeah, wonderful. Except I know the...
260
00:09:28,991 --> 00:09:30,490
they're a little... some problems.
261
00:09:30,526 --> 00:09:33,160
- It's been in the news of late...
- Oh.
262
00:09:33,195 --> 00:09:37,280
with a lot of girls having
eating disorders and cutting
263
00:09:37,332 --> 00:09:40,083
and a lot of emotional disturbances.
264
00:09:40,119 --> 00:09:41,835
- You saw that?
- Well, of course.
265
00:09:41,870 --> 00:09:44,337
I think we all did.
The suicide was a bad one.
266
00:09:44,373 --> 00:09:47,040
Well, yes, it was, um, it was...
267
00:09:47,042 --> 00:09:48,542
it was a tragedy,
268
00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:52,179
but, um,
I have to say she was not well-liked.
269
00:09:52,214 --> 00:09:53,680
- Oh.
- And, she...
270
00:09:53,716 --> 00:09:55,549
So the girls don't need
some kind of trauma,
271
00:09:55,601 --> 00:09:58,051
crisis counseling...
272
00:09:58,103 --> 00:10:00,220
- Not right at the moment.
- Because of that?
273
00:10:00,272 --> 00:10:02,389
No, we are well beyond that incident.
274
00:10:02,441 --> 00:10:04,441
- Okay.
- But actually,
275
00:10:04,476 --> 00:10:06,610
- that's not why I'm calling.
- Oh.
276
00:10:06,645 --> 00:10:09,062
I have a very specific question I...
277
00:10:09,064 --> 00:10:14,151
I wanted to ask your advice about.
278
00:10:14,203 --> 00:10:17,788
I have recently become engaged.
279
00:10:17,823 --> 00:10:19,656
Oh, that's just an engagement ring?
280
00:10:19,708 --> 00:10:21,958
I thought that was a mess of rings.
281
00:10:21,994 --> 00:10:23,910
Oh, no, that's... that is one...
282
00:10:23,962 --> 00:10:27,581
that's one single... oh, it is!
That's a huge...
283
00:10:27,633 --> 00:10:29,082
- congratulations...
- Thank you.
284
00:10:29,134 --> 00:10:30,717
- To the young man...
- Well...
285
00:10:30,753 --> 00:10:33,303
And best wishes to you.
286
00:10:33,338 --> 00:10:34,805
He's actually on...
287
00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:36,473
on the board of... of the Frick School.
288
00:10:36,508 --> 00:10:37,591
- Oh.
- He sits on the board.
289
00:10:37,593 --> 00:10:39,392
His name is Lionel Manning.
290
00:10:39,428 --> 00:10:41,011
The Lionel Manning?
291
00:10:41,063 --> 00:10:42,512
Yes.
292
00:10:42,564 --> 00:10:44,481
Well, then congratulations to you.
293
00:10:44,516 --> 00:10:46,099
Yes, thank you very much.
294
00:10:46,101 --> 00:10:48,602
It's...
it's been an extraordinary ride so far.
295
00:10:48,604 --> 00:10:52,355
He has unlimited resources,
as I know you know.
296
00:10:52,407 --> 00:10:54,574
- Yes.
- And, um, I'm thrilled.
297
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,443
I never thought in a m...
298
00:10:56,445 --> 00:10:58,695
my wildest dreams that
I would end up with him.
299
00:10:58,747 --> 00:11:00,280
He just lost his wife last year, so...
300
00:11:00,332 --> 00:11:02,949
- Oh.
- But he's taking me away on a...
301
00:11:02,951 --> 00:11:05,335
on a very romantic weekend this weekend,
302
00:11:05,370 --> 00:11:10,123
and I actually was concerned
about what to wear.
303
00:11:10,125 --> 00:11:13,510
And I thought that you would
be someone who could help me...
304
00:11:13,545 --> 00:11:16,546
if you can just... now, I have this,
305
00:11:16,598 --> 00:11:19,516
which I'm very comfortable in.
306
00:11:19,551 --> 00:11:23,053
This is a... just a simple cotton
flannel nightgown, but very...
307
00:11:23,105 --> 00:11:25,055
Oh, it is a nightgown.
308
00:11:25,107 --> 00:11:26,973
It is a nightgown... I mean, this is...
I'm talking for... in...
309
00:11:26,975 --> 00:11:29,142
not out to dinner, I mean, in...
in the bedroom.
310
00:11:29,194 --> 00:11:31,361
- In the bedroom, yes.
- Now, I have this choice,
311
00:11:31,396 --> 00:11:34,481
and then I have this,
which I ordered online,
312
00:11:34,483 --> 00:11:36,399
and I'm a little, uh...
313
00:11:36,451 --> 00:11:37,951
- a little scared of it.
- I can't see it.
314
00:11:37,986 --> 00:11:39,286
- Oh!
- It's, um...
315
00:11:39,321 --> 00:11:40,537
No, that's the one you wear.
316
00:11:40,572 --> 00:11:42,072
Not even...
317
00:11:42,124 --> 00:11:43,540
- no contest.
- No contest?
318
00:11:43,575 --> 00:11:45,125
Well, it depends on what your goal is.
319
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:48,044
Are you trying to turn him off?
320
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:51,998
Or are you trying to entice him?
321
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,333
Well, I'd... I...
322
00:11:53,385 --> 00:11:55,252
That's more authoritative and sexy,
323
00:11:55,304 --> 00:11:56,803
and I think that's the way to go.
324
00:11:56,839 --> 00:11:58,922
But this...
I might feel uncomfortable in this,
325
00:11:58,974 --> 00:12:01,308
and therefore not be sexy to him in this.
326
00:12:01,343 --> 00:12:04,261
He's not going to be taking
in your mental state.
327
00:12:04,313 --> 00:12:06,897
He's just gonna be looking at...
328
00:12:06,932 --> 00:12:08,515
You know, other things. My gosh, well...
329
00:12:08,567 --> 00:12:09,983
I... I thought there would be
330
00:12:10,018 --> 00:12:11,484
a little more debate about it,
but I guess...
331
00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:13,103
But what have you been wearing, anyway?
332
00:12:13,155 --> 00:12:15,355
Why is this weekend different from others?
333
00:12:15,357 --> 00:12:16,990
Well, we... we haven't, um,
334
00:12:17,025 --> 00:12:19,526
we haven't had, uh, sex.
335
00:12:19,528 --> 00:12:21,611
We're going to be having sex
336
00:12:21,663 --> 00:12:24,030
for the first time this weekend, so...
337
00:12:24,082 --> 00:12:26,499
Okay, well,
what's worked for you in the past,
338
00:12:26,535 --> 00:12:30,287
with your former lovers or husbands,
I don't know?
339
00:12:30,339 --> 00:12:34,708
I, uh...
Actually, the truth of the matter is,
340
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,927
I-I've...
341
00:12:36,962 --> 00:12:38,712
Oh, there's nothing to be ashamed about.
342
00:12:38,764 --> 00:12:43,300
I just... I've never actually...
it's my f...
343
00:12:43,352 --> 00:12:45,302
Oh, my goodness, oh,
my goodness, my goodness.
344
00:12:45,354 --> 00:12:47,270
Yes, 'cause it is a little more than,
345
00:12:47,306 --> 00:12:48,855
"oh, it's nothing to be ashamed about."
346
00:12:48,891 --> 00:12:51,274
I mean,
I guess there's a little shame, huh?
347
00:12:51,310 --> 00:12:53,476
- All right, I'll just say it.
- It's perfectly natural to...
348
00:12:53,528 --> 00:12:57,063
I have not had...
I have not had sexual intercourse before.
349
00:12:57,065 --> 00:12:58,565
And... I think I understood that.
350
00:12:58,617 --> 00:13:00,450
And... I was a leader of... of girls.
351
00:13:00,485 --> 00:13:02,652
I'm not a breeder, as my father said,
"you're not a breeder,
352
00:13:02,704 --> 00:13:04,037
you're a leader."
353
00:13:04,072 --> 00:13:05,705
Your father said that to you?
354
00:13:05,741 --> 00:13:06,656
Yes, he did. Yes, he did.
355
00:13:06,708 --> 00:13:08,408
I loved my father very much.
356
00:13:08,460 --> 00:13:10,460
Right. That sounds like it's a warm memory.
357
00:13:10,495 --> 00:13:12,579
Okay, well.
358
00:13:12,581 --> 00:13:14,297
All right, so there it is.
The cat's out of the bag.
359
00:13:14,333 --> 00:13:16,082
Yeah, the cat is out of the bag...
360
00:13:16,134 --> 00:13:18,919
- It is out of the bag. So...
- and ready to run.
361
00:13:18,971 --> 00:13:21,671
Okay, you know what? Here's the thing.
362
00:13:21,723 --> 00:13:24,724
You... your first time with someone
363
00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:28,728
cannot be with your intended, all right?
364
00:13:28,764 --> 00:13:30,680
That's... that's a very bad idea.
365
00:13:30,732 --> 00:13:32,518
- You know, the first time...
- Yes?
366
00:13:32,538 --> 00:13:36,269
is a nightmare horror of an experience.
367
00:13:36,271 --> 00:13:41,825
So I think you need to get
that first time out of the way.
368
00:13:41,860 --> 00:13:46,496
And how am I supposed to... do that?
369
00:13:46,531 --> 00:13:47,998
Oh, you find someone else.
370
00:13:48,033 --> 00:13:50,240
You can't go away with him this weekend.
371
00:13:50,260 --> 00:13:54,287
You have to find someone else to be with.
Anyone.
372
00:13:54,339 --> 00:14:00,293
I... surely you can't be
suggesting that I go have sex
373
00:14:00,345 --> 00:14:02,846
with somebody I don't know?
374
00:14:02,881 --> 00:14:05,632
Oh,
I'm absolutely suggesting that you have sex
375
00:14:05,634 --> 00:14:07,801
with someone else before...
376
00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:10,020
is there no handyman on the grounds, or...
377
00:14:10,055 --> 00:14:12,689
- Well, no.
- An attractive biology teacher,
378
00:14:12,724 --> 00:14:15,058
or, you know, pizza delivery guy?
379
00:14:15,110 --> 00:14:16,309
- Pizza delivery?
- You know,
380
00:14:16,311 --> 00:14:18,395
then it's, "oh, I don't have...
381
00:14:18,447 --> 00:14:21,314
come with me so I can give you a tip."
382
00:14:21,366 --> 00:14:22,816
You know, maybe you wink.
383
00:14:22,868 --> 00:14:24,200
- Oh, my goodness.
- Do you know what I mean?
384
00:14:24,236 --> 00:14:25,819
You have to know what you're in for.
385
00:14:25,821 --> 00:14:27,153
- My goodness.
- Take my word for it.
386
00:14:27,205 --> 00:14:28,621
It's not fun the first time.
387
00:14:28,657 --> 00:14:30,790
I... I always thought
388
00:14:30,826 --> 00:14:34,577
it would be...
magical the first time, and I... I...
389
00:14:34,629 --> 00:14:35,745
really? That...
390
00:14:35,797 --> 00:14:37,946
well, that wasn't my experience.
391
00:14:37,966 --> 00:14:41,384
I can't imagine that it's
a wonderful first time.
392
00:14:41,436 --> 00:14:43,136
Oh, my goodness.
This is exactly what I'm...
393
00:14:43,138 --> 00:14:44,804
I'm telling my... my girl...
394
00:14:44,806 --> 00:14:47,640
I'm trying to... to... to raise these girls
395
00:14:47,642 --> 00:14:49,692
so they won't have to
deal with these issues.
396
00:14:49,728 --> 00:14:51,978
I mean, I don't want them thinking
397
00:14:52,030 --> 00:14:54,447
about these sexual things.
398
00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:56,699
It's... it's very upsetting to me.
I don't...
399
00:14:56,735 --> 00:14:58,234
Huh. And yet they're cutting
400
00:14:58,286 --> 00:15:00,570
and starving themselves and... You know.
401
00:15:00,622 --> 00:15:05,074
Yes, but Fiona,
there are symphonies to be written.
402
00:15:05,126 --> 00:15:07,327
There are novels to be written.
403
00:15:07,379 --> 00:15:10,963
There are countries to be presidents of.
404
00:15:10,999 --> 00:15:12,632
Right, but all of the kinds of people
405
00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:17,253
who succeed at these things
have extremely high libidos,
406
00:15:17,305 --> 00:15:20,173
and there's no end to the
conquests they have sexually.
407
00:15:20,225 --> 00:15:23,226
- Well, I...
- it kind of goes hand in hand.
408
00:15:23,261 --> 00:15:25,978
I'm not sure I agree with that. I...
409
00:15:26,014 --> 00:15:27,680
- Mozart?
- Well...
410
00:15:27,682 --> 00:15:29,682
- Right? I mean, Jane Austen?
- Well...
411
00:15:29,734 --> 00:15:31,851
Who knows how many sexual partners she had?
412
00:15:31,903 --> 00:15:34,020
- I... I don't know.
- No, we don't get to know,
413
00:15:34,022 --> 00:15:35,571
but...
414
00:15:35,607 --> 00:15:37,190
I think people who channel their...
415
00:15:37,242 --> 00:15:42,028
these...
these libidinous desires into their work
416
00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:46,783
can sometimes create extraordinary things
417
00:15:46,835 --> 00:15:48,668
that far surpass anything that a...
418
00:15:48,703 --> 00:15:50,336
that a, you know, moment's...
419
00:15:50,372 --> 00:15:53,206
an evening of passion would... would...
420
00:15:54,843 --> 00:15:57,877
But how would you know?
421
00:15:57,879 --> 00:15:59,128
- Touche.
- Right?
422
00:15:59,180 --> 00:16:00,430
- Touche.
- You have to be thinking
423
00:16:00,465 --> 00:16:02,131
- long-term about that.
- All right.
424
00:16:02,183 --> 00:16:04,684
I have to consider this, then.
I don't... I don't know
425
00:16:04,719 --> 00:16:06,519
how I'm going to do it, but I will, um...
426
00:16:06,554 --> 00:16:08,438
I'm concerned for you,
427
00:16:08,473 --> 00:16:10,556
that you don't know much about the world.
428
00:16:10,558 --> 00:16:12,892
I mean, he's a very wealthy man.
429
00:16:12,944 --> 00:16:15,978
Has he had you sign a pre-nup?
430
00:16:16,030 --> 00:16:17,897
Uh, we are working on the pre-nup,
actually,
431
00:16:17,899 --> 00:16:20,616
which is very important for a man of,
you know,
432
00:16:20,652 --> 00:16:24,203
Lionel's... considerable wealth.
433
00:16:24,239 --> 00:16:25,705
- Right.
- And... and I'm... so far,
434
00:16:25,740 --> 00:16:27,156
I mean, he's very generously given me
435
00:16:27,208 --> 00:16:28,991
a million dollars should something go wrong
436
00:16:29,043 --> 00:16:32,578
with the marriage, and... and...
and he wanted to give me more,
437
00:16:32,630 --> 00:16:36,582
but his son, Ford, has been very, uh, um...
438
00:16:36,584 --> 00:16:37,917
antagonistic toward me
439
00:16:37,969 --> 00:16:40,052
and very upset about
this impending marriage
440
00:16:40,088 --> 00:16:41,554
between me and his father, and I'm...
441
00:16:41,589 --> 00:16:44,257
Sure, 'cause any sum that goes to you
442
00:16:44,259 --> 00:16:46,309
is cutting into his inheritance.
443
00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:50,313
Yes,
but we're talking billions and billions
444
00:16:50,348 --> 00:16:52,682
- and billions of dollars.
- Right.
445
00:16:52,734 --> 00:16:54,767
So you need to ask for
more than a million dollars
446
00:16:54,769 --> 00:16:56,853
over what period of time?
447
00:16:56,905 --> 00:16:58,654
- That's nothing.
- A million dollars.
448
00:16:58,690 --> 00:17:01,240
- That's a drop in the bucket.
- That's a lot of money.
449
00:17:01,276 --> 00:17:02,775
- It's not that much.
- Oh.
450
00:17:02,777 --> 00:17:04,861
It's a million dollars per annum
451
00:17:04,913 --> 00:17:06,279
that you're married, or...
452
00:17:06,331 --> 00:17:07,864
'Cause how old is Lionel, anyway?
453
00:17:07,916 --> 00:17:11,117
He's... he's in his...
454
00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:13,953
his... I think he's seventy...
455
00:17:14,005 --> 00:17:15,505
- four.
- Right, so it won't be...
456
00:17:15,540 --> 00:17:16,956
it won't amount to that much, anyway,
457
00:17:16,958 --> 00:17:18,591
even if it is a million dollars per year.
458
00:17:18,626 --> 00:17:20,042
All right, you're right. You're right.
459
00:17:20,094 --> 00:17:21,878
- I should reach out to him.
- Absolutely.
460
00:17:21,930 --> 00:17:23,129
I'm going to reach out to Ford
461
00:17:23,131 --> 00:17:25,214
and perhaps just smooth the waters and...
462
00:17:25,266 --> 00:17:27,350
and try to understand
463
00:17:27,385 --> 00:17:31,103
why he bears so much ill
will toward me when I... I...
464
00:17:31,139 --> 00:17:32,805
I love his father, and...
465
00:17:32,857 --> 00:17:34,223
and...
466
00:17:34,275 --> 00:17:35,641
- you're gonna make him happy...
- I am.
467
00:17:35,643 --> 00:17:38,194
And maybe more generous to Ford, right?
468
00:17:38,229 --> 00:17:39,612
Well, that's a good way to...
469
00:17:39,647 --> 00:17:41,113
- the happier his father is...
- Yes.
470
00:17:41,149 --> 00:17:43,316
The more generous he
may feel toward his son.
471
00:17:43,318 --> 00:17:45,818
Thank you.
I have... I have to write that down.
472
00:17:45,820 --> 00:17:47,537
Right. And maybe you have some information.
473
00:17:47,572 --> 00:17:49,789
Whether it's true or not doesn't matter,
474
00:17:49,824 --> 00:17:53,042
but you could let Ford know,
"I happen to think your father
475
00:17:53,077 --> 00:17:55,077
- needs to leave you more money."
- Oh!
476
00:17:55,129 --> 00:17:57,330
- Right? To you.
- Yes, and get him on my side.
477
00:17:57,332 --> 00:17:58,831
- Get him on your side.
- And see that I am
478
00:17:58,883 --> 00:18:00,833
his partner in this.
That's very good advice.
479
00:18:00,835 --> 00:18:02,084
- Right.
- Fiona, thank you.
480
00:18:02,136 --> 00:18:05,004
I'm so glad I called you today.
481
00:18:05,056 --> 00:18:06,255
I'm so happy to help,
482
00:18:06,307 --> 00:18:08,007
and I'd love to help with the girls.
483
00:18:08,009 --> 00:18:10,176
You've got a lot of interesting,
wonderful advice,
484
00:18:10,178 --> 00:18:11,477
and maybe I'll have a lot
485
00:18:11,513 --> 00:18:13,646
to thank you for in our next session.
486
00:18:13,681 --> 00:18:15,848
Well, you know, a contract with your school
487
00:18:15,850 --> 00:18:17,934
would be a wonderful thank you.
488
00:18:24,025 --> 00:18:25,124
Hello.
489
00:18:25,159 --> 00:18:26,592
You are Nina Garcia.
490
00:18:26,628 --> 00:18:29,195
I don't think we have an appointment.
491
00:18:29,230 --> 00:18:31,864
Are you Fiona Wallice?
492
00:18:31,866 --> 00:18:33,833
Yes, Fiona. You contacted me.
493
00:18:33,868 --> 00:18:35,034
Yes, I'm Fiona Wallice.
494
00:18:35,086 --> 00:18:36,619
Yes, hi, Fiona.
495
00:18:36,671 --> 00:18:40,623
You won the silent
auction at the pink eye...
496
00:18:40,675 --> 00:18:42,792
Oh, from the... the pink eye...
497
00:18:42,844 --> 00:18:44,427
- From the pink eye...
- ball. Oh!
498
00:18:44,462 --> 00:18:46,295
The pink eye ball. That is correct.
499
00:18:46,347 --> 00:18:47,964
I called it the pink eyeball.
500
00:18:48,016 --> 00:18:50,099
Yeah. That's not... wasn't that fun?
501
00:18:50,134 --> 00:18:51,717
Yes, that was quite an event.
502
00:18:51,769 --> 00:18:54,387
What a wonderful evening.
Yes, it was really fun.
503
00:18:54,439 --> 00:18:58,774
I thought that it was the pink guy ball.
504
00:18:58,810 --> 00:19:01,193
And so I was expecting to
see different people...
505
00:19:01,229 --> 00:19:02,895
Maybe the pink gay ball?
506
00:19:02,897 --> 00:19:05,281
That's what I thought.
507
00:19:05,316 --> 00:19:08,117
It was that anyway, wasn't it?
508
00:19:08,152 --> 00:19:09,735
- Yes.
- Did you see the woman with
509
00:19:09,787 --> 00:19:12,989
- the cotton candy-white hair?
- She was a sufferer.
510
00:19:13,041 --> 00:19:15,408
- You saw her eye, of course.
- Oh.
511
00:19:15,410 --> 00:19:17,043
And she was a big donor.
512
00:19:17,078 --> 00:19:19,462
Oh, well, then that is very important.
513
00:19:19,497 --> 00:19:21,047
- That is very important.
- Yeah.
514
00:19:21,082 --> 00:19:22,415
I didn't notice her eye. I was too busy
515
00:19:22,467 --> 00:19:25,751
looking at the other things, but anyway.
516
00:19:25,803 --> 00:19:28,387
No, I won't say any more
horrible things about her.
517
00:19:28,423 --> 00:19:30,006
Oh, God.
518
00:19:30,058 --> 00:19:31,390
What did I win, again? I'm sorry.
519
00:19:31,426 --> 00:19:33,175
- So you won a makeover...
- Oh.
520
00:19:33,227 --> 00:19:34,927
- With me.
- Oh.
521
00:19:34,979 --> 00:19:38,731
And it will possibly translate
into a magazine makeover.
522
00:19:38,766 --> 00:19:40,149
- Oh.
- Mm-hmm.
523
00:19:40,184 --> 00:19:42,351
You have that kind of clout, really?
524
00:19:42,403 --> 00:19:44,904
That it would be in a magazine?
525
00:19:44,939 --> 00:19:46,772
- Well, I'm Nina Garcia.
- Yes, I see that,
526
00:19:46,824 --> 00:19:48,908
but I don't know... I'm sorry.
527
00:19:48,943 --> 00:19:51,110
Have you not seen Project Runway?
528
00:19:51,112 --> 00:19:53,112
Oh, no, I haven't.
529
00:19:53,114 --> 00:19:54,447
Oh, well, it is a TV show.
530
00:19:54,449 --> 00:19:56,332
Right, no, I know what it is.
531
00:19:56,367 --> 00:19:58,451
I personally watch America's Next Top Model
532
00:19:58,503 --> 00:20:00,786
because I find the models so fascinating,
533
00:20:00,838 --> 00:20:04,507
as opposed to the seamstresses,
or the dressmakers.
534
00:20:04,542 --> 00:20:06,676
- Oh, so you have heard of it?
- Of course I've heard of it.
535
00:20:06,711 --> 00:20:08,761
- And you are on it along with...
- Yes.
536
00:20:08,796 --> 00:20:11,964
um... the german woman.
537
00:20:12,016 --> 00:20:13,466
- Heidi Klum.
- Auf Wiedersehen.
538
00:20:13,518 --> 00:20:15,351
- Yes.
- Yes, okay.
539
00:20:15,386 --> 00:20:17,436
Oh, very good. All right.
540
00:20:17,472 --> 00:20:19,972
- So I am on that show, and...
- And you're a stylist?
541
00:20:20,024 --> 00:20:22,391
- No, I'm not a stylist.
- Okay.
542
00:20:22,443 --> 00:20:24,143
I don't really style, but...
543
00:20:24,145 --> 00:20:25,611
Are you a contestant, or...
544
00:20:25,647 --> 00:20:27,897
- I'm not a contestant, no.
- All right.
545
00:20:27,949 --> 00:20:29,899
I'm one of the judges of the show.
546
00:20:29,951 --> 00:20:32,451
- Oh. Oh.
- And an editor of the magazine.
547
00:20:32,487 --> 00:20:34,320
- Oh! Okay.
- And I am here
548
00:20:34,322 --> 00:20:36,405
to do a transformation...
549
00:20:36,457 --> 00:20:38,991
If I needed a makeover,
that would be great.
550
00:20:39,043 --> 00:20:40,960
As you can see, I don't, really.
551
00:20:40,995 --> 00:20:43,412
So let's talk about what you
say with your fashion sense.
552
00:20:43,464 --> 00:20:45,748
What exactly is it that you do?
553
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:49,669
Are you a suburban housewife? No. No.
554
00:20:49,721 --> 00:20:51,837
- I'm a professional.
- Are you a realtor?
555
00:20:51,839 --> 00:20:54,473
Is this your uniform that
you're wearing right now?
556
00:20:54,509 --> 00:20:57,009
- No.
- Oh. I'm so sorry.
557
00:20:57,011 --> 00:20:58,678
I apologize. I just saw the...
558
00:20:58,730 --> 00:21:01,514
You sort of look like you're in uniform.
559
00:21:01,516 --> 00:21:03,149
Anyway, getting back to the topic...
560
00:21:03,184 --> 00:21:05,234
Well,
I would love to be in a fashion magazine,
561
00:21:05,269 --> 00:21:07,269
but I don't think the makeover part
562
00:21:07,321 --> 00:21:10,106
of it is appealing to me
'cause you're not really going to
563
00:21:10,158 --> 00:21:13,526
take me from "a" to "a."
564
00:21:13,528 --> 00:21:15,194
I'm already at "a."
565
00:21:15,246 --> 00:21:17,196
- Um...
- Being the highest mark.
566
00:21:17,198 --> 00:21:19,031
No, I don't think you're at "a."
567
00:21:19,083 --> 00:21:20,616
- Oh.
- Actually, I really...
568
00:21:20,668 --> 00:21:25,121
we need to...
a makeover involves a before and an after.
569
00:21:25,173 --> 00:21:28,207
That's my point.
There's no before to shoot.
570
00:21:28,209 --> 00:21:30,876
All I see right now is before.
571
00:21:30,878 --> 00:21:35,464
So I just want to turn
you from a suburbanite
572
00:21:35,516 --> 00:21:37,683
into a glamorous, sophisticated,
573
00:21:37,719 --> 00:21:40,269
and sexy woman. I'm sure it's in there.
574
00:21:40,304 --> 00:21:42,304
I don't... I guess our eyes aren't...
575
00:21:42,356 --> 00:21:43,272
I have a big team,
576
00:21:43,307 --> 00:21:45,441
and I know, Fiona,
577
00:21:45,476 --> 00:21:48,110
that you are trying very hard,
578
00:21:48,146 --> 00:21:50,062
but it's just not cutting it.
579
00:21:50,114 --> 00:21:52,982
What...
well, what exactly is not cutting it,
580
00:21:53,034 --> 00:21:56,285
the striking, powerful statement of red,
581
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:59,989
or the finely-tailored blazer?
582
00:22:00,041 --> 00:22:01,907
What part of it's not cutting it for you?
583
00:22:01,959 --> 00:22:04,460
No, none of it is.
Actually, none of it is working.
584
00:22:04,495 --> 00:22:07,963
The over-bleached hair,
585
00:22:07,999 --> 00:22:11,417
the wrong shade of red,
586
00:22:11,419 --> 00:22:14,253
the boxy fit of your jacket,
587
00:22:14,305 --> 00:22:16,255
it's just giving me an... it's...
588
00:22:16,257 --> 00:22:18,591
it's giving me very mall.
589
00:22:18,593 --> 00:22:21,343
Do you shop at the mall?
Where are you, actually?
590
00:22:21,395 --> 00:22:22,895
I'm in Philadelphia.
591
00:22:22,930 --> 00:22:24,513
Have you ever been to New York, Fiona?
592
00:22:24,565 --> 00:22:26,182
I'm frequently in New York.
593
00:22:26,234 --> 00:22:29,151
I have a penthouse apartment in New York,
and...
594
00:22:29,187 --> 00:22:31,604
So next time in... that you're in New York,
595
00:22:31,656 --> 00:22:34,490
we will schedule you to come by the office.
596
00:22:34,525 --> 00:22:36,408
- Mm-hmm.
- We will...
597
00:22:36,444 --> 00:22:38,444
I can pull some samples together.
598
00:22:38,496 --> 00:22:41,580
You're not sample size,
but we'll have a seamstress
599
00:22:41,616 --> 00:22:43,699
- there that can do the fittings.
- P-yes.
600
00:22:43,751 --> 00:22:45,451
I'll call some of my designer friends.
601
00:22:45,503 --> 00:22:46,919
- Oh.
- And trust me,
602
00:22:46,954 --> 00:22:49,538
there will be a... an enormous improvement.
603
00:22:49,590 --> 00:22:51,841
Oh, well, that's wonderful.
604
00:22:51,876 --> 00:22:54,543
And how quickly can you lose ten pounds?
605
00:22:59,634 --> 00:23:00,966
Hi, best friend.
606
00:23:00,968 --> 00:23:03,018
Oh, yes, best friend.
607
00:23:03,054 --> 00:23:07,056
You should know that this
one has been stalking me
608
00:23:07,108 --> 00:23:08,691
and harassing me,
609
00:23:08,726 --> 00:23:11,527
calling nonstop every day,
multiple times a day.
610
00:23:11,562 --> 00:23:13,112
- Every day. All the time.
- Yes.
611
00:23:13,147 --> 00:23:14,480
We have the best talks.
612
00:23:14,482 --> 00:23:16,115
No, she's talking and yammering.
613
00:23:16,150 --> 00:23:17,650
- I can't get anything done.
- Oh,
614
00:23:17,702 --> 00:23:19,618
You did your nails like I said.
They look so pretty.
615
00:23:19,654 --> 00:23:21,403
It's multiple times a day...
616
00:23:21,455 --> 00:23:22,788
Well, she's your friend, Fiona.
617
00:23:22,824 --> 00:23:24,156
- Multiple times.
- No, she's not.
618
00:23:24,158 --> 00:23:26,325
- Best friend.
- No, I'm her mark,
619
00:23:26,377 --> 00:23:27,409
is what I am, so I've...
620
00:23:27,461 --> 00:23:30,546
My mark of a best friend.
621
00:23:30,581 --> 00:23:33,382
I've contacted the Philadelphia FBI.
622
00:23:33,417 --> 00:23:34,834
- What?
- And I've let them know
623
00:23:34,836 --> 00:23:37,052
that she's unfit for Witness Protection.
624
00:23:37,088 --> 00:23:38,838
- What? You can't do that.
- So... well, I did do it.
625
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:41,090
So they're going to be
faxing a release over,
626
00:23:41,142 --> 00:23:43,509
- I don't know, any day, now.
- Wait, wait, wait.
627
00:23:43,511 --> 00:23:45,344
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, you've got to hear this.
628
00:23:45,396 --> 00:23:47,012
You've got to hear this.
629
00:23:47,064 --> 00:23:48,480
Someone's at the door.
630
00:23:48,516 --> 00:23:50,099
- I'll get it.
- Oh, that was fast.
631
00:23:50,151 --> 00:23:52,184
- No, you can't...
- Yes, I did.
632
00:23:52,236 --> 00:23:55,521
But I did, because I can't be
harassed like this anymore.
633
00:23:55,523 --> 00:23:57,323
She wants... she's not going to stop
634
00:23:57,358 --> 00:23:59,491
until she's removed
from Witness Protection.
635
00:23:59,527 --> 00:24:01,277
- Fiona.
- That's what I know.
636
00:24:01,329 --> 00:24:03,162
She has been amazing the last few days.
637
00:24:03,197 --> 00:24:04,496
I... I love her.
638
00:24:04,532 --> 00:24:06,031
I would do anything for her.
She... look at.
639
00:24:06,033 --> 00:24:07,166
Look at what I did.
640
00:24:07,201 --> 00:24:08,951
What is that? Those are tattoos?
641
00:24:09,003 --> 00:24:11,287
- Yes, tattoo sleeves.
- Didn't it hurt?
642
00:24:11,339 --> 00:24:13,372
Well, no, it's... they're... no, Fiona.
643
00:24:13,424 --> 00:24:15,090
They're tattoo sleeves.
644
00:24:15,126 --> 00:24:16,759
- They're literally sleeves.
- Oh.
645
00:24:16,794 --> 00:24:19,628
- I just bought them, 9.99.
- Uh-huh.
646
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,263
Yes, you did go all out.
647
00:24:21,299 --> 00:24:22,715
It's... it's been amazing.
648
00:24:22,717 --> 00:24:25,351
In bed, she has been amazing.
649
00:24:25,386 --> 00:24:29,054
It's... usually she just curls up in a...
650
00:24:29,056 --> 00:24:32,224
like a horrible kind of a ball.
651
00:24:32,226 --> 00:24:34,526
- Mmm.
- And she's been spooning, and...
652
00:24:34,562 --> 00:24:36,445
and... and sexually,
653
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:39,398
she's been very generous,
and usually she's not.
654
00:24:39,450 --> 00:24:41,233
Okay. That's nice.
655
00:24:41,285 --> 00:24:43,569
And... do you know what motorboating is?
656
00:24:43,621 --> 00:24:46,205
- No.
- Well, it's fun.
657
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:47,406
Okay, good, yes.
658
00:24:47,458 --> 00:24:49,325
I don't want details. Um...
659
00:24:49,377 --> 00:24:51,460
Well, she's really sweet,
660
00:24:51,495 --> 00:24:53,162
and it's bizarre.
661
00:24:53,214 --> 00:24:56,799
We go outside,
and birds land on her finger,
662
00:24:56,834 --> 00:25:00,252
and chipmunks come up and sit there and...
663
00:25:00,304 --> 00:25:01,754
it's like they're communicat...
664
00:25:01,806 --> 00:25:03,589
Right, well, they recognize her as part
665
00:25:03,641 --> 00:25:05,174
of their animal kingdom,
666
00:25:05,226 --> 00:25:07,893
some kind of vermin that
they feel comfortable with.
667
00:25:07,929 --> 00:25:09,094
That's the only explanation I can...
668
00:25:09,146 --> 00:25:10,396
She's been so beautiful.
669
00:25:10,431 --> 00:25:11,847
- Oh.
- She makes me rethink my...
670
00:25:11,899 --> 00:25:13,432
All right, bitches, I'm off to Vegas.
671
00:25:13,434 --> 00:25:15,267
- Right.
- Thanks for this.
672
00:25:15,319 --> 00:25:17,186
- What?
- Genius.
673
00:25:17,238 --> 00:25:20,105
Honest to God, if I had to deal
with scheduling and organizing
674
00:25:20,107 --> 00:25:21,740
and keeping track of one more vagina,
675
00:25:21,776 --> 00:25:23,609
I was gonna blow my brains out.
676
00:25:23,661 --> 00:25:24,493
- Uh-huh.
- You've been great.
677
00:25:24,528 --> 00:25:26,278
You were genius.
678
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:27,663
- Genius.
- Wait a minute, wait a minute.
679
00:25:27,698 --> 00:25:29,448
- Good-bye, a-best friend.
- No, no, no.
680
00:25:29,450 --> 00:25:31,700
What about... what about the...
what about the dance studio?
681
00:25:31,752 --> 00:25:33,452
Text me. Hey, call me a cab, will you?
682
00:25:33,454 --> 00:25:36,088
No... well, wait a minute.
What about Tyrone?
683
00:25:36,123 --> 00:25:38,624
I'm not gonna raise Tyrone by myself.
684
00:25:38,676 --> 00:25:39,758
Bye!
685
00:25:39,794 --> 00:25:43,762
- What...
- Call me a cab!
686
00:25:43,798 --> 00:25:46,098
I've got to call her a cab.
687
00:25:46,133 --> 00:25:48,550
Yes. Okay, I won't keep you.
688
00:25:48,602 --> 00:25:50,302
- I hope you're happy.
- I am happy.
689
00:25:50,354 --> 00:25:51,687
I have my life back.
690
00:25:51,722 --> 00:25:53,222
I'm sorry. I didn't have a choice.
691
00:25:53,274 --> 00:25:54,807
I had to get her out of there.
692
00:25:54,809 --> 00:25:56,558
- This was her scheme.
- Oh.
693
00:25:56,610 --> 00:25:58,644
Stop blaming me.
694
00:25:58,696 --> 00:26:01,280
- I get it.
- Uh-oh.
695
00:26:01,315 --> 00:26:03,449
- I get what you're doing.
- Okay.
696
00:26:03,484 --> 00:26:06,118
This is a pattern, Fiona.
697
00:26:06,153 --> 00:26:08,203
You're always clearing
the women out of my life
698
00:26:08,239 --> 00:26:09,621
so you can pounce.
699
00:26:09,657 --> 00:26:11,123
What is it that you would like to happen?
700
00:26:11,158 --> 00:26:13,158
What do you think is going to happen, now?
701
00:26:13,210 --> 00:26:17,880
I... I would like to do
some motorboating with you.
702
00:26:17,915 --> 00:26:20,666
Okay, you know what?
I am gonna come out there.
703
00:26:20,668 --> 00:26:23,385
What happens is I will hold your breasts...
704
00:26:23,421 --> 00:26:24,636
Okay, I'm going
705
00:26:24,672 --> 00:26:27,389
- to come out there, all right?
- Yeah.
706
00:26:27,425 --> 00:26:30,759
So I want you to stay in Montana.
707
00:26:30,811 --> 00:26:32,678
- Okay.
- And wait for me.
708
00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:34,229
- Okay.
- Wait for me.
709
00:26:34,265 --> 00:26:37,850
- I will.
- Okay, I'm gonna go pack now.
710
00:26:37,902 --> 00:26:39,601
- I'll be waiting.
- All right.
711
00:26:39,653 --> 00:26:42,021
Pfffffftt!
712
00:26:46,379 --> 00:26:47,776
- I know what a flyaway hair is.
- Oh.
713
00:26:47,828 --> 00:26:49,161
You said a flyaway.
714
00:26:49,196 --> 00:26:50,579
I didn't know what that was.
715
00:26:50,614 --> 00:26:52,364
I thought it was something
that you put at the end
716
00:26:52,416 --> 00:26:53,832
- of a fishing pole...
- Yeah.
717
00:26:53,868 --> 00:26:57,453
If you're at a lake with hip boots on.
718
00:27:00,596 --> 00:27:02,424
- I'll do that at the end.
- No, but the last time,
719
00:27:02,460 --> 00:27:03,759
- you went, "no, it's a..."
- Yeah, I know.
720
00:27:03,794 --> 00:27:04,927
- I really was bad.
- What?
721
00:27:04,962 --> 00:27:06,512
I, um...
722
00:27:06,547 --> 00:27:08,047
That's what I needed you to say.
723
00:27:08,099 --> 00:27:09,681
I'll say it after. I'll do it after that.
724
00:27:09,717 --> 00:27:12,468
And I'll try to get it right,
Lisa, I'm sorry.
725
00:27:14,942 --> 00:27:17,189
What do they call that? A...
726
00:27:17,224 --> 00:27:18,724
I don't... on the...
oh, what you put on the door?
727
00:27:18,776 --> 00:27:21,777
- Yes.
- A menorah. No.
728
00:27:23,900 --> 00:27:27,399
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
54498
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