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1
00:00:01,534 --> 00:00:03,803
What are you doing?
2
00:00:03,843 --> 00:00:07,106
Filling in a questionnaire
for speed dating.
3
00:00:07,380 --> 00:00:08,852
Speed dating?
4
00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,609
Basically, you sit
at a table at the mall
5
00:00:10,676 --> 00:00:14,170
and have a series of 5-minute
dates with different women.
6
00:00:14,271 --> 00:00:17,951
And how is that different
from all your other dates?
7
00:00:18,436 --> 00:00:20,152
They ring a bell at the end.
8
00:00:20,166 --> 00:00:22,418
But you still go home alone.
9
00:00:22,819 --> 00:00:25,115
Speed dating sounds like
something for desperate people
10
00:00:25,118 --> 00:00:26,369
who want to have a relationship
11
00:00:26,371 --> 00:00:28,336
without having to get
to know each other.
12
00:00:28,338 --> 00:00:31,243
You don't have to sell
me, 'Baby'. I'm there.
13
00:00:32,231 --> 00:00:33,199
Hey, you guys.
14
00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:34,367
I got great news.
15
00:00:34,433 --> 00:00:35,734
Mine's better.
16
00:00:35,801 --> 00:00:38,578
My art project was chosen
out of a hundred submissions
17
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:40,182
to be displayed at the mall.
18
00:00:40,249 --> 00:00:43,442
They're making glitter
mascara in my shade.
19
00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:46,688
Did you hear that,
'gang'? In her shade!
20
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:49,057
My winning project
is a statement
21
00:00:49,124 --> 00:00:51,317
about the
objectification of women.
22
00:00:51,319 --> 00:00:54,262
It's a transparent box
big enough for me to sit in.
23
00:00:54,329 --> 00:00:57,199
Oh, Kerry, I don't even
think you could fit in that box.
24
00:00:57,859 --> 00:01:01,323
This is a model. The
actual one is much bigger.
25
00:01:01,355 --> 00:01:02,321
Anyway,
26
00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:04,552
I'm making a point
about men seeing women
27
00:01:04,554 --> 00:01:08,253
as shiny objects admired
only for their superficial beauty.
28
00:01:08,255 --> 00:01:10,023
Honey, that is just so-
29
00:01:10,025 --> 00:01:13,575
Wow! that stuff really
makes your eyes sparkly.
30
00:01:14,099 --> 00:01:15,257
Mom!
31
00:01:15,259 --> 00:01:16,827
Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
32
00:01:17,385 --> 00:01:19,621
I'm so proud. I'm so proud.
33
00:01:19,687 --> 00:01:22,524
This is exactly what
my project is all about.
34
00:01:22,591 --> 00:01:24,893
I mean, look at you
tarting yourself all up.
35
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,996
Everything you do is to
get the attention of guys.
36
00:01:26,998 --> 00:01:29,498
It's also to make
other girls jealous.
37
00:01:31,099 --> 00:01:32,234
Mom!
38
00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:35,103
So very proud.
39
00:01:35,170 --> 00:01:37,472
This is so typical of my life
40
00:01:37,539 --> 00:01:39,086
I do something really important,
41
00:01:39,088 --> 00:01:41,369
and then Bridget just
bats her glittery eyes,
42
00:01:41,371 --> 00:01:42,743
and nothing else matters.
43
00:01:42,745 --> 00:01:45,447
Mom! You're not gonna
believe what just happened.
44
00:01:45,461 --> 00:01:47,816
I was on my way, and I
heard this engine sputter.
45
00:01:47,882 --> 00:01:48,899
And I looked up,
46
00:01:48,901 --> 00:01:51,613
and this plane landed
right in the middle of the-
47
00:01:51,761 --> 00:01:52,650
Bridget;
48
00:01:52,652 --> 00:01:54,923
Your eyes,
they're beautiful.
49
00:01:55,368 --> 00:01:56,942
Hey, forget about that.
50
00:01:56,944 --> 00:01:59,914
Kerry got on the Chess
Club or something.
51
00:02:06,509 --> 00:02:08,533
Over there, grandpa;
you missed a spot.
52
00:02:08,580 --> 00:02:09,759
To the left.
53
00:02:09,814 --> 00:02:11,144
No, to my left.
54
00:02:11,146 --> 00:02:12,747
Well, don't get snippy.
55
00:02:12,759 --> 00:02:15,033
In my day, women were oppressed,
56
00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:17,283
but they didn't go down to
the mall and shout about it.
57
00:02:17,379 --> 00:02:19,981
No, they ironed
and drank in secret,
58
00:02:19,983 --> 00:02:22,174
and everyone was happy.
59
00:02:22,190 --> 00:02:24,626
I know I was.
60
00:02:27,169 --> 00:02:30,825
So, this is the
project that beat me.
61
00:02:30,892 --> 00:02:33,895
Oh, my God! You're Tyler McBain.
62
00:02:33,962 --> 00:02:35,121
You won last year.
63
00:02:35,123 --> 00:02:37,034
And the year before, but...
64
00:02:37,206 --> 00:02:39,007
yours looks intriguing.
65
00:02:39,067 --> 00:02:40,957
Well, it's not done yet.
66
00:02:40,963 --> 00:02:43,934
Good. I did "Old man
polishing a box" 2 years ago.
67
00:02:44,439 --> 00:02:45,736
I loved that.
68
00:02:45,738 --> 00:02:47,471
I was partially
inspired by that.
69
00:02:47,473 --> 00:02:50,334
Well, why don't I come
back when you're all set up?
70
00:02:50,346 --> 00:02:52,281
I'd love to get a closer look.
71
00:02:52,814 --> 00:02:54,316
Cool.
72
00:02:54,382 --> 00:02:56,151
Oh, I'm Kerry.
73
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:57,820
See you later, Kerry.
74
00:03:01,233 --> 00:03:03,629
Honey; Who was that
kid you were flirting with?
75
00:03:03,631 --> 00:03:05,793
I was not flirting.
76
00:03:06,012 --> 00:03:10,832
That is Tyler McBain!
He's an artistic legend!
77
00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:12,868
Oh, my God! I can't
believe someone like him
78
00:03:12,935 --> 00:03:14,702
would be interested in my work.
79
00:03:14,769 --> 00:03:16,538
I knew he looked familiar.
80
00:03:16,604 --> 00:03:17,788
A couple of years ago,
81
00:03:17,790 --> 00:03:20,021
he gave me 50
bucks to Polish a box.
82
00:03:25,565 --> 00:03:27,057
Hey, can I talk to
you for a second.
83
00:03:27,059 --> 00:03:28,944
Wait. This is very important.
84
00:03:28,962 --> 00:03:30,894
I'm playing match the
butt to the teen star.
85
00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:34,589
10 out of 10. I'm like
a 'butt genius'! -Hey
86
00:03:34,656 --> 00:03:38,192
Listen, I'm doing
this speed-dating thing,
87
00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:39,500
and since you and I
88
00:03:39,502 --> 00:03:41,304
are the two most successful
daters in the house-
89
00:03:41,306 --> 00:03:43,308
When was your last date?
90
00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:46,522
Anyway; Listen, um, I...
91
00:03:46,601 --> 00:03:48,201
I could use your advice.
92
00:03:48,203 --> 00:03:51,130
Change the pants.
Lose the beard. Get a job.
93
00:03:51,154 --> 00:03:53,653
Oh, and use a moisturizer.
94
00:03:53,808 --> 00:03:56,337
Thanks, but I'm serious.
95
00:03:56,339 --> 00:03:57,531
What's in it for me?
96
00:03:57,533 --> 00:03:59,950
First: If I get a date,
I'll be around here less.
97
00:04:00,075 --> 00:04:01,844
-Second: -
-Sold.
98
00:04:01,888 --> 00:04:03,973
Listen, in speed dating,
you only got 5 minutes,
99
00:04:03,975 --> 00:04:06,419
and I got to come
out of the box. Boom!
100
00:04:06,421 --> 00:04:08,489
All right, when I'm into a guy,
101
00:04:08,491 --> 00:04:11,059
I give him a
little shot of this.
102
00:04:12,098 --> 00:04:15,564
What? That's ridiculous.
103
00:04:18,100 --> 00:04:20,035
Lips! Stop the lips!
What are you doing?!
104
00:04:20,101 --> 00:04:22,244
-Don't do that in my mirror! What?
-You don't like the lips?
105
00:04:22,246 --> 00:04:25,167
No! You look like that
old rolling stones guy.
106
00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:26,721
Oh.
107
00:04:26,723 --> 00:04:28,159
Awesome!
108
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:33,207
I am so sorry you
had to see that.
109
00:04:36,650 --> 00:04:38,786
Yo! Hennessy; what's happening?
110
00:04:38,788 --> 00:04:40,956
Hey, just hanging out, you know?
111
00:04:41,456 --> 00:04:43,771
Well, come with us. We're
gonna go check out the arcade.
112
00:04:43,773 --> 00:04:45,746
Oh, I'll catch up with you.
113
00:04:45,748 --> 00:04:48,830
I'm kind of waiting on a lady.
114
00:04:48,897 --> 00:04:50,648
All right, dog.
115
00:04:50,650 --> 00:04:53,720
So, honey, racecars
or dinosaurs?
116
00:04:57,038 --> 00:04:58,607
Mom!
117
00:04:58,609 --> 00:05:00,344
Uh, they're not for him.
118
00:05:00,346 --> 00:05:03,204
[Boy] Go with the racecars.
119
00:05:16,157 --> 00:05:17,859
Hey!
120
00:05:17,925 --> 00:05:21,029
It's been like 2 hours.
Anybody looked at this thing?
121
00:05:21,095 --> 00:05:22,519
There's been people.
122
00:05:22,521 --> 00:05:24,323
Why don't you fill it with water
123
00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:27,494
and then see how long
it takes you to escape?
124
00:05:28,168 --> 00:05:30,392
It's art, not a magic trick.
125
00:05:30,395 --> 00:05:31,419
I don't know.
126
00:05:31,421 --> 00:05:33,190
You sure made the
people disappear.
127
00:05:33,918 --> 00:05:35,187
Ha ha ha.
128
00:05:35,237 --> 00:05:37,331
Why don't you just run
along, go buy some makeup?
129
00:05:37,333 --> 00:05:39,100
Kerry, I'm not kidding.
If you want people to stop
130
00:05:39,102 --> 00:05:41,516
and look at this, you
can't be so boring in there.
131
00:05:41,529 --> 00:05:44,513
Move around; put on a
sho; a little razzle-dazzle.
132
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:47,289
Something like this...
133
00:05:47,355 --> 00:05:49,677
Or like this.
134
00:05:49,679 --> 00:05:51,480
Oh, so maybe I
should just install
135
00:05:51,482 --> 00:05:53,313
a big silver pole in here.
136
00:05:53,315 --> 00:05:55,467
Now you are thinking.
137
00:05:55,545 --> 00:05:59,476
Bridget, if I want help
with lipstick or shoes,
138
00:05:59,478 --> 00:06:01,832
I will give you a call,
but when it comes to art,
139
00:06:01,834 --> 00:06:04,184
I think I know what
people want to see.
140
00:06:04,573 --> 00:06:06,174
You don't have a clue.
141
00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,842
Oh, yeah?
142
00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:10,445
You think I don't know what
people want to see?! Pshh!
143
00:06:23,224 --> 00:06:25,140
Get out of there! You're
ruining everything!
144
00:06:25,142 --> 00:06:27,311
Ruining it? People are
finally looking at it, okay?
145
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,072
I don't have a clue, huh?
146
00:06:33,668 --> 00:06:36,404
Oh, my God, Bridget,
do you really need
147
00:06:36,406 --> 00:06:38,331
another excuse to
get more attention.
148
00:06:38,333 --> 00:06:41,450
You can't talk to
me like that. I'm art.
149
00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:47,282
This is my thing! Now get out!
150
00:06:47,284 --> 00:06:50,376
Litte girl; Can you get out of
the way? We want to see this.
151
00:06:58,521 --> 00:07:00,881
What's going on there babe.
152
00:07:00,883 --> 00:07:02,746
Now, are you
wearing space pants?
153
00:07:02,748 --> 00:07:04,877
'Cause your ass
is out of this world.
154
00:07:05,100 --> 00:07:07,702
You should see
me in bicycle shorts.
155
00:07:07,769 --> 00:07:09,571
How long have you been there?
156
00:07:09,573 --> 00:07:12,340
Oh, somewhere between
"What up, baby girl?"
157
00:07:12,342 --> 00:07:15,178
And "you put the
fizzle in my dizzle."
158
00:07:15,198 --> 00:07:18,101
Listen, I'll have them
lining up around the block,
159
00:07:18,279 --> 00:07:20,048
especially when they see this.
160
00:07:20,114 --> 00:07:21,716
Very impressive, but I think
161
00:07:21,718 --> 00:07:23,085
you're supposed to put
162
00:07:23,087 --> 00:07:24,521
the big bill on the outside.
163
00:07:24,665 --> 00:07:27,012
The big bill is on the outside.
164
00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:32,070
What a great idea
putting Bridget in the box.
165
00:07:32,072 --> 00:07:33,662
I didn't put Bridget in the box.
166
00:07:33,664 --> 00:07:35,430
She got in when I took a break,
167
00:07:35,432 --> 00:07:37,432
and now the whole
thing is a disaster.
168
00:07:42,705 --> 00:07:44,818
Well, just a little disaster,
169
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,142
and the people really
seem to be enjoying it.
170
00:07:47,209 --> 00:07:49,678
They're not supposed
to enjoy it. It's art.
171
00:07:52,837 --> 00:07:54,105
Stop it!
172
00:07:54,696 --> 00:07:57,717
All right, all right.
Honey, just calm down.
173
00:07:57,719 --> 00:08:00,622
-I'll get her out of the box.
-Try filling it with water.
174
00:08:00,839 --> 00:08:02,591
Where are you going?
175
00:08:02,667 --> 00:08:04,603
Away from here. I don't
want anybody to know
176
00:08:04,625 --> 00:08:07,228
I had anything to do
with that embarrassment.
177
00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:16,605
-Bridget, time to get out of the box.
-What?!
178
00:08:16,671 --> 00:08:18,941
Honey, it's Kerry's pro-
179
00:08:21,895 --> 00:08:23,679
It's Kerry's project.
180
00:08:23,745 --> 00:08:26,039
Now, I know you didn't
intend to be mean,
181
00:08:26,041 --> 00:08:27,983
but, you know, let's face it,
182
00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:30,819
you have a history of
stealing your sister's thunder.
183
00:08:30,821 --> 00:08:32,388
But, mom, this is fun.
184
00:08:32,390 --> 00:08:35,005
I want you out of there now.
185
00:08:35,083 --> 00:08:36,409
[People] Oh...oh..no...
186
00:08:36,491 --> 00:08:39,027
All right, all right, all
right. 5 more minutes.
187
00:08:46,734 --> 00:08:50,104
There you are. I saw
your "Woman in a box."
188
00:08:50,171 --> 00:08:53,108
-Oh, I can explain.
-Shh.
189
00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:58,046
I totally get what
you were going for.
190
00:08:58,113 --> 00:08:59,381
You do?
191
00:08:59,447 --> 00:09:01,249
The objectification of women.
192
00:09:01,315 --> 00:09:03,818
And that perfectly plastic
blonde you put in there --
193
00:09:03,885 --> 00:09:07,556
Oh, my God; Brilliant choice.
194
00:09:07,622 --> 00:09:09,567
Thank you.
195
00:09:09,569 --> 00:09:11,927
You have...
196
00:09:11,994 --> 00:09:14,229
You have no idea what I
went through to find her.
197
00:09:14,296 --> 00:09:16,097
You know...
198
00:09:16,164 --> 00:09:18,500
This is something I don't
say to a lot of girls, but...
199
00:09:18,968 --> 00:09:23,305
I really get you. And I
think you could get me.
200
00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:29,512
You want to go out sometime,
maybe get some coffee?
201
00:09:31,045 --> 00:09:33,148
I like coffee.
202
00:09:34,649 --> 00:09:37,055
Can I get a scone?
203
00:09:44,259 --> 00:09:47,248
Are you wearing space pants-
204
00:09:47,729 --> 00:09:49,965
What? Come on.
205
00:09:50,032 --> 00:09:54,069
I got 4 minutes
and 56 seconds left.
206
00:09:54,136 --> 00:09:57,005
Ooh, you are putting
a fizzle in my di...
207
00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,075
...zzle.
208
00:10:15,372 --> 00:10:18,190
So I laid down the
law with my mom.
209
00:10:18,192 --> 00:10:20,161
I said, "Listen, Cate"
210
00:10:20,228 --> 00:10:22,463
I call her that when I'm
laying down the law
211
00:10:22,472 --> 00:10:25,933
I said, "From now on,
when I'm doing my thing,
212
00:10:25,935 --> 00:10:28,035
you got to stay
out of my grill."
213
00:10:28,037 --> 00:10:30,907
So, you don't have to call
in or meet her or anything?
214
00:10:30,951 --> 00:10:32,703
Dude, I told her
215
00:10:32,741 --> 00:10:35,510
I do not need adult
supervision at the mall.
216
00:10:35,512 --> 00:10:37,714
Oh, hey, champ, I thought
I saw you over here.
217
00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:40,648
Aha. I got your favorite
extra sprinkies.
218
00:10:40,715 --> 00:10:43,017
That's what he calls
them "Sprinkies"
219
00:10:43,084 --> 00:10:46,219
'cause when he was little, he
couldn't pronounce "Sprinkles."
220
00:10:48,056 --> 00:10:49,992
Wait, guys!
221
00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:52,927
'Thanks', grandpa.
222
00:10:52,994 --> 00:10:55,367
Now I'm the biggest
loser in the mall.
223
00:10:55,369 --> 00:10:58,383
No. You're not the
biggest loser in the mall.
224
00:11:21,657 --> 00:11:22,891
Hey!
225
00:11:23,723 --> 00:11:24,991
Hey!
226
00:11:25,231 --> 00:11:27,596
I have never said "Sprinkies."
227
00:11:27,662 --> 00:11:28,997
Yes, you did.
228
00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:30,665
You think I'm gonna forget
229
00:11:30,687 --> 00:11:32,501
the cute things
my grandson said?
230
00:11:35,509 --> 00:11:37,571
Hey, take my place
at speed dating.
231
00:11:37,596 --> 00:11:39,622
I don't want to lose my
turn. I'm on fire today.
232
00:11:39,691 --> 00:11:41,476
Ooh, sprinkies.
233
00:11:43,372 --> 00:11:44,980
Maybe it was him.
234
00:11:48,950 --> 00:11:52,053
Hey, aren't you the
girl from the box?
235
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:54,856
-Yeah.
-I enjoyed watching you.
236
00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:57,358
Well, everybody
does. I'm Bridget.
237
00:11:57,425 --> 00:11:59,060
I mean, I'm Bridget.
238
00:11:59,126 --> 00:12:02,964
It takes someone with real
depth to pull off that plasticity.
239
00:12:03,031 --> 00:12:05,066
Totally.
240
00:12:05,133 --> 00:12:07,034
I know something deep
was going on in there.
241
00:12:07,101 --> 00:12:09,137
I mean, what were you
thinking about in that box?
242
00:12:09,203 --> 00:12:13,407
Oh, war, suffering,
but mostly puppies.
243
00:12:13,474 --> 00:12:14,942
Wow.
244
00:12:15,009 --> 00:12:17,578
You know, I don't
say this to a lot of girls,
245
00:12:17,656 --> 00:12:21,694
but I really get you, and I
think you could really get me.
246
00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:24,552
Want to go out sometime?
247
00:12:24,619 --> 00:12:26,555
I don't know what kind
of girl you think I am,
248
00:12:26,621 --> 00:12:28,256
but I don't go out with anyone
249
00:12:28,323 --> 00:12:30,091
unless I know them
just a little better.
250
00:12:30,158 --> 00:12:31,693
And I don't even know your name.
251
00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:34,134
-I'm Tyler.
-How about tonight, Tyler?
252
00:12:36,491 --> 00:12:40,982
In my day, yeah we
took a girl out on a date.
253
00:12:40,984 --> 00:12:44,280
We bought her candy
and flowers. I like roses
254
00:12:44,282 --> 00:12:46,424
and then drove
her out to the lake
255
00:12:46,426 --> 00:12:50,196
to that special spot under
the pines, and we talked,
256
00:12:50,262 --> 00:12:53,390
and not in 5-minute increments.
257
00:12:53,833 --> 00:12:56,602
Okay, She got the $5,
258
00:12:56,669 --> 00:12:58,571
but I got most of the $1s back.
259
00:12:58,638 --> 00:13:00,907
So, now that you've
spent a few minutes
260
00:13:00,909 --> 00:13:02,909
with the museum
of natural history
261
00:13:02,976 --> 00:13:04,577
How about a little modern art?
262
00:13:04,644 --> 00:13:06,312
I'm sorry. Could
you leave us alone?
263
00:13:06,378 --> 00:13:07,980
I'm talking to this gentleman.
264
00:13:08,039 --> 00:13:10,748
But he's not even...
I'm the one.
265
00:13:10,937 --> 00:13:13,486
But, come on. You're --
266
00:13:13,553 --> 00:13:15,894
Dah!!
267
00:13:20,991 --> 00:13:22,759
Kerry, okay, before
you say anything,
268
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:24,764
I am so sorry I stole
your art project at the mall.
269
00:13:24,830 --> 00:13:27,633
It's your thing, not mine.
Please don't be mad at me.
270
00:13:27,700 --> 00:13:29,502
It's okay. I'm not mad.
271
00:13:29,569 --> 00:13:31,437
Well, you were really
pissed off this morning.
272
00:13:31,503 --> 00:13:33,573
Well, you know us artists.
273
00:13:33,639 --> 00:13:36,072
We get all moody 'cause of
274
00:13:36,074 --> 00:13:38,471
paint fumes and everything.
275
00:13:39,742 --> 00:13:41,478
But I'm over it.
276
00:13:41,490 --> 00:13:42,926
You're over it?
277
00:13:43,047 --> 00:13:45,149
I stole your scrunchie
like 6 years ago,
278
00:13:45,151 --> 00:13:47,086
and you never let
me live that down.
279
00:13:48,900 --> 00:13:50,518
Okay, fine.
280
00:13:50,741 --> 00:13:52,156
I met a guy.
281
00:13:52,158 --> 00:13:53,593
Really?
282
00:13:53,659 --> 00:13:55,428
Yeah, and he
thinks I'm brilliant
283
00:13:55,495 --> 00:13:57,263
for putting you in the box,
284
00:13:57,329 --> 00:13:59,599
and so now I'm
gonna go with that.
285
00:14:00,098 --> 00:14:02,475
Wow. And I thought this box was
286
00:14:02,477 --> 00:14:04,235
the most important
thing in your whole life.
287
00:14:04,237 --> 00:14:05,538
I know.
288
00:14:05,604 --> 00:14:07,373
I am the world's
biggest hypocrite,
289
00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:10,528
and I've sold out everything
I believe in for a guy.
290
00:14:10,830 --> 00:14:13,345
Oh, Kerry, we are sisters.
291
00:14:13,412 --> 00:14:16,348
[Cate:] Girls, dinner!
292
00:14:16,415 --> 00:14:20,486
Oh, Rory, I just bought
you that shirt, and it's just-
293
00:14:20,553 --> 00:14:22,489
Mom; Would you stop doing that?
294
00:14:22,555 --> 00:14:24,256
I'm not 5 years old.
295
00:14:24,323 --> 00:14:26,092
I don't need 'race_car' pajamas,
296
00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:28,261
I don't need you to
hold my hand at the mall,
297
00:14:28,339 --> 00:14:30,374
and I don't need
my napkin tucked in.
298
00:14:30,429 --> 00:14:33,325
I just need you to start
treating me like an adult.
299
00:14:33,861 --> 00:14:35,769
I'm sorry.
300
00:14:35,814 --> 00:14:37,536
Thanks.
301
00:14:37,603 --> 00:14:40,573
Now, can I please
have more "Psketti"?
302
00:14:40,905 --> 00:14:44,409
That's right! You are
'Psketti'; You were 'Sprinkies',
303
00:14:44,421 --> 00:14:47,523
and you just loved 'to
go peepee' in the garden.
304
00:14:48,335 --> 00:14:50,689
Don't you have a date?
305
00:14:50,801 --> 00:14:52,972
Oh, yeah, I'm gonna have to go.
306
00:14:52,974 --> 00:14:54,410
Where are you taking her?
307
00:14:54,477 --> 00:14:56,579
Well, I thought a
drink and a movie
308
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:58,380
and then, you know...
309
00:14:58,447 --> 00:15:00,081
Who knows?
310
00:15:00,148 --> 00:15:01,884
Uh, just a reminder,
311
00:15:01,950 --> 00:15:04,620
I'm over my "I want
a little sister" phase.
312
00:15:04,687 --> 00:15:06,421
You know, I don't get it.
313
00:15:06,488 --> 00:15:08,557
I strike out a million
times in a row.
314
00:15:08,623 --> 00:15:10,559
This guy steps up
once, gets a home run.
315
00:15:10,626 --> 00:15:12,060
What's the secret?
316
00:15:12,127 --> 00:15:15,263
Well, C.J., I just
try to be myself.
317
00:15:15,330 --> 00:15:18,200
I don't try to dress
it up and sell it.
318
00:15:18,202 --> 00:15:19,868
Then, if that doesn't work,
319
00:15:19,884 --> 00:15:22,304
I tell some cock-and-bull
story about a lake.
320
00:15:22,371 --> 00:15:23,764
No hard feelings, right?
321
00:15:23,766 --> 00:15:26,241
I forgot about it already.
322
00:15:26,308 --> 00:15:27,786
Oh...
323
00:15:28,777 --> 00:15:31,147
Looks like our 5 minutes are up.
324
00:15:31,213 --> 00:15:32,614
Don't wait up.
325
00:15:34,382 --> 00:15:36,118
The guy's an inspiration.
326
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:38,687
I hope I'm still getting
dates when I'm his age.
327
00:15:38,754 --> 00:15:41,090
I hope you get a date
before you're his age.
328
00:15:43,058 --> 00:15:45,961
Hey, what took
you girls so long?
329
00:15:46,028 --> 00:15:48,727
Oh, we were just talking.
You know, a little sister time.
330
00:15:48,738 --> 00:15:50,881
Ah, so everything is okay again?
331
00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:52,607
Yes, we realize it's really dumb
332
00:15:52,611 --> 00:15:54,167
to fight over petty things.
333
00:15:54,169 --> 00:15:56,104
We are way more
mature than that.
334
00:15:56,171 --> 00:15:57,940
And we both met great guys!
335
00:15:57,942 --> 00:15:59,427
Oh, ho... That's wonderful!
336
00:15:59,429 --> 00:16:01,975
-I'm going out tonight.
-And I'm going out tomorrow night.
337
00:16:01,977 --> 00:16:04,514
Okay, I get it! I'm the
only one not going out!
338
00:16:06,127 --> 00:16:07,556
C.J., Let it go.
339
00:16:07,558 --> 00:16:09,351
I've let it gone.
340
00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:13,622
Well, there's the asparagus.
341
00:16:13,688 --> 00:16:15,657
So, where did you
meet these guys?
342
00:16:15,724 --> 00:16:17,859
-At the mall.
-At the mall.
343
00:16:17,861 --> 00:16:19,263
And what's their names?
344
00:16:19,265 --> 00:16:20,963
-Tyler.
-Tyler.
345
00:16:22,063 --> 00:16:24,500
McBain?
346
00:16:26,187 --> 00:16:28,270
Oh, my God!
347
00:16:28,337 --> 00:16:31,673
Wait. You --ooooowW!
348
00:16:33,063 --> 00:16:35,366
How could you do this to me?
349
00:16:35,411 --> 00:16:37,179
What?! I didn't do anything to you!
350
00:16:37,181 --> 00:16:39,047
-Girls
-You do what you always do!
351
00:16:39,114 --> 00:16:41,983
God! Is there any part of my life
you don't want to take away from me?!
352
00:16:41,985 --> 00:16:44,121
I don't want your hair.
353
00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,889
That's right,
Bridget, make a joke.
354
00:16:47,891 --> 00:16:49,627
Well, it's not a joke to me.
355
00:16:49,758 --> 00:16:51,192
You know what?
356
00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:53,231
Just take it all. I give up.
357
00:16:53,253 --> 00:16:55,295
I'll just disappear.
358
00:16:58,873 --> 00:17:01,226
That's why I don't date.
359
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:06,635
Yeah,; That's why.
360
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:09,863
Bridget, why don't you just
call this Tyler and cancel?
361
00:17:09,865 --> 00:17:12,612
Why are you taking her side?
I didn't do anything wrong?
362
00:17:12,679 --> 00:17:14,614
I know you didn't.
363
00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:16,218
It's complicated.
364
00:17:16,284 --> 00:17:18,386
It has to do with the
kind of person you are
365
00:17:18,453 --> 00:17:20,399
and the kind of person Kerry is.
366
00:17:21,088 --> 00:17:24,025
I'm gonna break it
down for you, 'Bridgie'.
367
00:17:24,265 --> 00:17:27,127
There's 2 types of people
in this world. All right?
368
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:29,711
There's the good
people, the solid people,
369
00:17:29,713 --> 00:17:32,086
like Kerry and your mom here,
370
00:17:32,365 --> 00:17:35,235
and then there's us.
371
00:17:35,237 --> 00:17:36,839
-Us?
-Yeah.
372
00:17:36,841 --> 00:17:39,107
The beautiful people.
373
00:17:39,174 --> 00:17:40,708
Yeah.
374
00:17:40,775 --> 00:17:44,713
We burn hot, baby,
red-hot, all right?
375
00:17:44,779 --> 00:17:47,482
But every now
and then, we got to
376
00:17:47,549 --> 00:17:49,317
Turn the heat down a little bit
377
00:17:49,384 --> 00:17:52,087
so the good people can
throw off a spark or two.
378
00:17:52,904 --> 00:17:55,057
We would be so grateful.
379
00:17:56,801 --> 00:17:59,770
Honey, why don't you call
this Tyler and cancel for Kerry?
380
00:17:59,772 --> 00:18:02,798
I mean, he's obviously
not the world's greatest guy.
381
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,334
But, mom, he's so cute,
382
00:18:04,336 --> 00:18:06,411
and we're not even sure
it's the same Tyler McBain.
383
00:18:06,501 --> 00:18:07,769
Bridget!
384
00:18:07,901 --> 00:18:09,994
Mom, I haven't had a
boyfriend this entire year.
385
00:18:09,996 --> 00:18:13,099
It's been a year?
Well, I feel a little better.
386
00:18:13,373 --> 00:18:15,876
Let me go at this
from a different angle.
387
00:18:15,878 --> 00:18:17,812
Just imagine, for one minute,
388
00:18:17,879 --> 00:18:20,316
what it would be like to
be Bridget's little sister.
389
00:18:21,950 --> 00:18:24,252
Oh, my god. I'd
have the coolest,
390
00:18:24,273 --> 00:18:26,187
hottest older sister
in the whole world.
391
00:18:26,254 --> 00:18:28,150
And there'd be a
few other things
392
00:18:28,152 --> 00:18:30,427
You wouldn't be the
girl that gets all the guys.
393
00:18:30,429 --> 00:18:31,818
You wouldn't be the girl that
394
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,748
everything comes so easily to.
395
00:18:33,770 --> 00:18:36,261
And you wouldn't be the
396
00:18:36,263 --> 00:18:37,712
most popular girl at school.
397
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:41,634
Honey, I'm not gonna forbid
you from seeing this guy,
398
00:18:41,636 --> 00:18:44,105
but do you really want
to do that to your sister?
399
00:18:44,172 --> 00:18:46,709
Just think about it.
400
00:18:49,642 --> 00:18:53,112
Okay, with the bells.
401
00:18:53,436 --> 00:18:55,265
There was no bell.
402
00:18:56,066 --> 00:18:58,602
Oh.
403
00:19:02,791 --> 00:19:04,793
I'm so glad we're out together.
404
00:19:04,860 --> 00:19:08,029
Me too. Your mind,
it fascinates me.
405
00:19:08,096 --> 00:19:10,031
Hey, who's your
favorite painter.
406
00:19:10,098 --> 00:19:12,500
Oh, I would have
to say pasquale.
407
00:19:12,567 --> 00:19:15,396
Pasquale? I'm not
familiar with his work.
408
00:19:15,398 --> 00:19:18,167
Oh, he did our
garage for really cheap.
409
00:19:19,801 --> 00:19:23,445
I really like you, Bridget,
and I really get you.
410
00:19:23,511 --> 00:19:26,715
Well, not so fast. You
haven't gotten me yet.
411
00:19:26,781 --> 00:19:28,562
Oh, there it is.
412
00:19:28,564 --> 00:19:30,785
Do you want to hop in?
413
00:19:30,852 --> 00:19:31,987
No.
414
00:19:32,053 --> 00:19:33,989
The whole point is the
objectification of women.
415
00:19:34,055 --> 00:19:35,490
If a man got in,
416
00:19:35,557 --> 00:19:37,826
it would totally compromise
the integrity of the piece.
417
00:19:37,892 --> 00:19:39,728
-I meant together.
-Yeah, sure.
418
00:19:39,795 --> 00:19:41,697
Okay.
419
00:19:41,763 --> 00:19:43,111
After you.
420
00:19:43,113 --> 00:19:45,205
It's gonna be a little
cramped in here.
421
00:19:45,207 --> 00:19:47,324
No, no, I don't think
it's gonna be that bad.
422
00:19:47,326 --> 00:19:48,871
Go for it.
423
00:19:51,039 --> 00:19:54,843
Hey, I believe you've
met the artist, my sister.
424
00:19:55,878 --> 00:19:59,547
What? You're sisters?
What's going on?
425
00:19:59,614 --> 00:20:02,151
Oh, oh. Shh, shh, shh.
426
00:20:04,686 --> 00:20:08,213
We don't say this
to a lot of guys, but...
427
00:20:08,215 --> 00:20:10,693
We really got you.
428
00:20:14,730 --> 00:20:16,665
Bridget, thank you.
You were awesome.
429
00:20:16,731 --> 00:20:18,533
You would have
done the same thing
430
00:20:18,623 --> 00:20:20,358
if I was your little sister.
431
00:20:20,401 --> 00:20:21,369
You're right.
432
00:20:21,436 --> 00:20:22,470
Kerry, look,
433
00:20:22,537 --> 00:20:23,939
I'm sorry if I do that thing
434
00:20:24,005 --> 00:20:26,208
where I steal stuff
that's important to you.
435
00:20:26,274 --> 00:20:27,909
I don't do it on purpose.
436
00:20:27,910 --> 00:20:28,591
I know.
437
00:20:28,616 --> 00:20:30,578
I'm gonna try to be
more sensitive to that.
438
00:20:30,645 --> 00:20:32,924
You are the best sister.
439
00:20:32,936 --> 00:20:37,032
I know, but I promise to try
not to be so obvious about it.
440
00:20:42,157 --> 00:20:45,275
Let me tell you a
little bit about my style.
441
00:20:45,399 --> 00:20:47,462
I like to take a girl out.
442
00:20:47,529 --> 00:20:49,448
I like to buy her nice things
443
00:20:49,459 --> 00:20:51,196
Candy, flowers.
444
00:20:51,241 --> 00:20:52,175
I like roses.
445
00:20:53,483 --> 00:20:56,137
We take off to the river
446
00:20:56,204 --> 00:21:00,053
and the park underneath the
tree with the pines, you know?
447
00:21:00,134 --> 00:21:02,171
And just talk,
448
00:21:02,253 --> 00:21:03,744
like the old days.
449
00:21:03,746 --> 00:21:07,717
People don't just talk. And
not for 5-minute increments.
450
00:21:08,549 --> 00:21:10,399
Hmm?
451
00:21:10,818 --> 00:21:14,621
Okay, well, I guess
not. Thanks, anyway.
452
00:21:15,491 --> 00:21:17,969
Are you wearing space pants?
453
00:21:20,424 --> 00:21:22,664
You know what? I am.
454
00:21:25,367 --> 00:21:26,802
-Oh.
-Oh.
455
00:21:27,495 --> 00:21:29,938
---oOo---
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