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Subtitles Provided by: hoomanind
Verified, Resynced & Edited by: Muzzy-chan
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You were incredible.
3
00:00:52,980 --> 00:00:55,025
My heart is still racing.
4
00:00:56,650 --> 00:00:58,420
I felt it too.
5
00:00:58,538 --> 00:01:03,715
All thanks to your brute strength, Dash,
and your knowledge of ancient Aramaic mathematics.
6
00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:08,899
Please. This has nothing to do with my two
doctorates and my master's in Gender Studies
7
00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,999
and everything to do
with you, Dr. Lovemore.
8
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:17,599
The truth is, I never thought
I would find the Lost City of D.
9
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I would choose your words carefully.
They will be your last.
10
00:01:22,860 --> 00:01:30,019
You led me right to King Kalaman's tomb
and his queen's legendary Crown of Fire.
11
00:01:30,020 --> 00:01:35,655
And now I will be very rich,
and you will be very dead.
12
00:01:36,299 --> 00:01:40,166
Um, hold up. Are these...
Are these your snakes?
13
00:01:40,540 --> 00:01:41,880
No, they were just here.
14
00:01:42,099 --> 00:01:44,579
There were just hundreds
of snakes in this temple...
15
00:01:44,580 --> 00:01:46,413
just waiting for us to show up?
16
00:01:46,517 --> 00:01:48,799
- W-Who feeds them? You feed them?
- No, what do they eat?
17
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:51,049
Why is that one not biting that guy?
Why is that happening?
18
00:01:51,050 --> 00:01:52,989
Are they trained not to bite
henchmen or something?
19
00:01:52,990 --> 00:01:53,499
Yeah, well...
20
00:01:53,500 --> 00:01:56,260
I mean, the snake-to-temple
ratio alone...
21
00:01:56,392 --> 00:01:58,859
This is ridiculous.
Delete.
22
00:01:59,499 --> 00:01:59,999
I...
23
00:02:00,117 --> 00:02:02,599
- I think my character can still work.
- Delete.
24
00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:07,690
- Loretta, you still have a story to write.
- Delete.
25
00:02:10,506 --> 00:02:11,919
Hey, it's me, Beth.
26
00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,894
I don't want to pull the whole
"I'm your publisher" card, but I am.
27
00:02:14,895 --> 00:02:17,269
And I'm really looking forward
to seeing this last chapter.
28
00:02:17,270 --> 00:02:19,589
But no pressure.
No, there actually is pressure.
29
00:02:19,590 --> 00:02:23,619
You know, the exact amount of pressure that
motivates you but doesn't paralyze you.
30
00:02:23,620 --> 00:02:25,045
You got this.
31
00:02:26,798 --> 00:02:27,798
Thank you.
32
00:02:28,642 --> 00:02:29,755
Me again.
33
00:02:29,756 --> 00:02:31,879
Okay, so everything
is set for the book tour,...
34
00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:34,899
but, uh, the only thing
we need is a book to tour with.
35
00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,989
You know, I can't help but get
the feeling that you're not finishing...
36
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,599
because you don't want
to leave your house.
37
00:02:39,820 --> 00:02:44,998
Listen, I know these last five years
have been hard after John's passing,...
38
00:02:44,999 --> 00:02:48,369
and it feels easier
to live in your bathtub,...
39
00:02:48,370 --> 00:02:51,399
drinking Chardonnay on ice,...
40
00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,109
but, girl, there is a great
big world waiting for you...
41
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:56,701
and a book tour that I can't cancel,
so just make it happen, all right?
42
00:02:56,702 --> 00:02:58,100
Love you, bye!
43
00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:18,780
We have to keep going.
44
00:03:20,050 --> 00:03:22,550
Let's see what's on the
other side of that door.
45
00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:27,585
- But what if there isn't anything?
- There's only one way to find out.
46
00:03:28,460 --> 00:03:32,789
Then Lovemore realized,
the treasure she wanted was lost forever...
47
00:03:32,790 --> 00:03:35,280
and her adventures
were coming to an end.
48
00:03:35,385 --> 00:03:38,420
- That doesn't feel right.
- Yeah, but that's it.
49
00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:39,680
That's the end.
50
00:03:48,910 --> 00:03:50,280
Well, John,...
51
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,200
here I go.
52
00:03:52,268 --> 00:03:54,545
Dulcius ex asperis.
53
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,934
- Okay, honey, it's showtime.
- Are you sure about this?
54
00:04:03,935 --> 00:04:07,425
Because I have a wedgie in the back
and in the front in this thing.
55
00:04:07,426 --> 00:04:09,870
I feel like a, uh, nerdy figure skater.
56
00:04:09,974 --> 00:04:12,655
- Sexy. Stunner. I'm all about it.
- No, it's not. It's not.
57
00:04:12,656 --> 00:04:14,699
- How do I move in this?
- Don't touch it.
58
00:04:14,700 --> 00:04:17,120
- I'm not touching it. I'm holding it out.
- Stop it. Will you stop?
59
00:04:17,150 --> 00:04:19,400
Get it out now 'cause you
can't do that onstage.
60
00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:21,999
And we're done.
And we're done. Okay, good.
61
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,199
Do I need to be wearing
a glitter onesie?
62
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:25,709
You only have to wear this
for two hours.
63
00:04:25,710 --> 00:04:27,799
Do not mess this up,
do you hear me? This is on loan.
64
00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:29,822
Everyone's wearing
sequins right now.
65
00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:33,409
- Why is she taking my photo?
- This is Allison.
66
00:04:33,410 --> 00:04:35,827
She is our new
social media manager.
67
00:04:35,828 --> 00:04:38,879
And she's gonna be helping us
target that younger demographic.
68
00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:41,455
Meaning women in their 30s
who wish they were in their 20s.
69
00:04:41,456 --> 00:04:42,769
Hey, what's up?
70
00:04:42,770 --> 00:04:46,527
Um, I took over your socials,
so this morning you tweeted,...
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00:04:46,528 --> 00:04:51,799
"Where are my ladies at?
Meet me at Ballroom G at 5:00 p.m.
72
00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:56,230
#ShawnMendes #GaggingtoMeetYouAll"
73
00:04:56,340 --> 00:04:59,030
Okay, we are having fun.
Let's go!
74
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,999
We need to remind people
that you are still alive.
75
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,476
P-People know I'm alive.
76
00:05:03,579 --> 00:05:05,347
And to remind them
why this used to be...
77
00:05:05,348 --> 00:05:07,721
- the best selling franchise.
- In Romance.
78
00:05:07,825 --> 00:05:10,551
Yes, which is the top
revenue-generating literary category.
79
00:05:10,552 --> 00:05:13,417
Well, revenue-generating isn't how
I would describe our presales right now.
80
00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:15,764
Just think of this as a way
that uses word of mouth.
81
00:05:15,765 --> 00:05:17,466
Oh, you want word of mouth?
Here we go. How's this?
82
00:05:17,490 --> 00:05:20,286
"The only thing more lost than
the city is the author herself."
83
00:05:20,389 --> 00:05:21,779
"Loveless."
"Passionless."
84
00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:26,153
Uh, "Way past her prime."
And, oh, "This is fake history at its worst."
85
00:05:26,257 --> 00:05:28,432
A book tour could
change everything, okay?
86
00:05:28,535 --> 00:05:30,848
We have to remind the fans
why they love you so much.
87
00:05:30,951 --> 00:05:34,541
Real history. I merely season
it with a smidge more nudity.
88
00:05:34,645 --> 00:05:36,854
History had a ton of nudity.
89
00:05:37,717 --> 00:05:39,788
Deep exploration.
90
00:05:39,892 --> 00:05:42,377
Steamy wondering.
91
00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:47,520
Will Lovemore and Dash find
Queen Taha's priceless Crown of Fire?
92
00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,418
Join them on their search.
93
00:05:49,522 --> 00:05:51,534
So, listen, I wanted to
talk to you about something.
94
00:05:51,558 --> 00:05:52,801
There's so many people.
95
00:05:52,904 --> 00:05:55,044
I know how much you hate
doing these things, you know,...
96
00:05:55,148 --> 00:05:57,875
so I've invited Alan to do
the Q and A with you today.
97
00:05:57,978 --> 00:06:00,069
- What?
- And the rest of the book tour.
98
00:06:00,070 --> 00:06:03,052
Beth, I expressly asked not to do any
more events with Dash... Alan, Alan!
99
00:06:03,156 --> 00:06:05,986
- He's-He's gonna humiliate me.
- He's not gonna humiliate you.
100
00:06:06,090 --> 00:06:09,127
Thank you. You're very good at your job.
Thank you so much. Thank you.
101
00:06:09,232 --> 00:06:10,439
Let me help you with that.
102
00:06:10,543 --> 00:06:12,442
He is... He's a body wash commercial.
103
00:06:12,545 --> 00:06:14,409
He's always glistening
all over the place.
104
00:06:14,512 --> 00:06:17,309
There hasn't been an event where
his shirt didn't come flying off.
105
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:18,834
- You wish.
- Well, he's already here,...
106
00:06:18,835 --> 00:06:21,337
so put on your big-girl panties
and let's get out there.
107
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:24,557
Remember, no grumpy face,
big words or boring academic talk.
108
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,939
Yes! Yes!
109
00:06:28,043 --> 00:06:29,976
Come on, RTP!
110
00:06:30,079 --> 00:06:31,564
Ha-ha!
111
00:06:31,667 --> 00:06:33,912
Yes, my Lovemore-heads!
112
00:06:34,014 --> 00:06:41,539
I am so excited to introduce to you
the award-winning author, Loretta Sage!
113
00:06:41,540 --> 00:06:43,939
- Beth, I can't do this. I'm not ready.
- What? Are you kidding me?
114
00:06:43,940 --> 00:06:45,889
- I'm not... I'm not...
- Listen, I've got your back. You got this.
115
00:06:45,890 --> 00:06:47,399
Go walk in, give the people
what they want.
116
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,478
- It's not me they want.
- Get out there now!
117
00:06:52,032 --> 00:06:55,864
Hi. How are you?
Nice to see you. Thank you.
118
00:07:01,214 --> 00:07:02,940
Yep. Mount it.
119
00:07:05,391 --> 00:07:08,290
Mount it. Mount it.
Okay.
120
00:07:08,394 --> 00:07:10,085
Find your center.
121
00:07:10,188 --> 00:07:13,744
And now, the moment
you've all been waiting for.
122
00:07:13,847 --> 00:07:15,609
- The sexiest,...
- All right!
123
00:07:15,610 --> 00:07:19,715
most influential hero
of a generation,...
124
00:07:19,819 --> 00:07:21,027
That's a bit strong.
125
00:07:21,130 --> 00:07:23,754
his 20th cover
of an Angela Lovemore novel,...
126
00:07:23,755 --> 00:07:26,480
Dash McMahon!
127
00:07:31,934 --> 00:07:34,454
Oh, my God! Dash!
128
00:07:57,132 --> 00:07:59,479
- Take a bow.
- I already did mine. I did mine.
129
00:07:59,583 --> 00:08:02,551
Okay, come on.
One more. I got you.
130
00:08:17,566 --> 00:08:19,223
Did you guys rehearse that?
Oh, my God.
131
00:08:19,326 --> 00:08:23,158
I'm loving this chemistry between
you two, and I got to say,...
132
00:08:23,261 --> 00:08:25,402
I love this book.
133
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:26,575
- Oh, thank—
- Oh, thank you, Ray.
134
00:08:26,679 --> 00:08:28,025
Spoiler alert.
135
00:08:28,110 --> 00:08:31,442
A really bold choice to not have
them go into the tomb at the end.
136
00:08:31,546 --> 00:08:33,168
Talk about what went into this one.
137
00:08:33,271 --> 00:08:35,899
- Well,...
- I mean, this one's such a special...
138
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:36,723
book for me personally.
139
00:08:36,827 --> 00:08:39,657
I... I don't know how to say
how much it means to me...
140
00:08:39,761 --> 00:08:45,010
that Loretta, word writer extraordinaire,
has, you know, named the book after me.
141
00:08:45,110 --> 00:08:46,940
The Lost City of Dash.
142
00:08:47,044 --> 00:08:48,148
The Lost City of D.
143
00:08:48,252 --> 00:08:50,496
Um, but that's not what
the D stands for.
144
00:08:50,599 --> 00:08:53,190
- It's D for "dick", right?
- No dick, no.
145
00:08:53,290 --> 00:08:56,398
It's based on the name
of an ancient tribe, Dapocagihou-dysphem-ica.
146
00:08:56,502 --> 00:09:01,058
And, um, it was too difficult for
the European colonizers to pronounce,...
147
00:09:01,161 --> 00:09:04,441
- so, in true colonial fashion they abbreviated it.
- No one cares about this.
148
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,270
That's so interesting. Okay.
149
00:09:06,373 --> 00:09:08,686
How about we take some
questions from the audience?
150
00:09:08,790 --> 00:09:10,585
- Right here, handsome!
- Yes.
151
00:09:10,688 --> 00:09:14,830
- Dash, what's your favorite romantic moment?
- Ooh!
152
00:09:14,934 --> 00:09:19,456
What I would really like to know is what
is Loretta's favorite romantic moment?
153
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,492
Ooh, spicy.
154
00:09:21,596 --> 00:09:26,324
Oh, uh...
Well, being a sapiosexual...
155
00:09:26,428 --> 00:09:28,637
Oh, is that when they do
the snakes around the...
156
00:09:28,741 --> 00:09:36,818
No. That's someone who finds, uh, intellect
or intelligence, uh, very sexy, you know.
157
00:09:36,921 --> 00:09:39,752
- Same.
- Really?
158
00:09:39,855 --> 00:09:42,271
Dash! Rip off your shirt!
159
00:09:42,375 --> 00:09:46,103
No, no, no. We're not gonna do that today.
We're here for Loretta's book.
160
00:09:46,206 --> 00:09:48,070
Do we have questions for Loretta?
161
00:09:48,174 --> 00:09:53,351
Uh, yes, studious-looking young lady?
What would you like to ask me?
162
00:09:53,455 --> 00:09:55,492
Can you rip off Dash's shirt?
163
00:09:57,045 --> 00:09:59,875
No, no. We're not gonna
do this again. Sorry.
164
00:09:59,979 --> 00:10:02,499
- Rip it off! Rip it off!
- Rip it off! Rip it off!
165
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,915
- Rip it off! Rip it off!
- Rip it off! Rip it off!
166
00:10:05,018 --> 00:10:08,746
Of course. Of course, yes. Can do.
167
00:10:09,713 --> 00:10:10,990
Is this happening?
168
00:10:11,093 --> 00:10:12,819
- You don't have to do this.
- Oh, we have to.
169
00:10:12,923 --> 00:10:14,994
We have to give the people
what they want. Yes, yes.
170
00:10:15,097 --> 00:10:17,824
We have to give the people
what they want, yes.
171
00:10:17,928 --> 00:10:21,172
Ladies and gentlemen, enjoy.
172
00:10:21,276 --> 00:10:25,936
Because the Lost City of D
is Dash's final adventure.
173
00:10:26,039 --> 00:10:28,110
If there even is a next book,...
174
00:10:28,214 --> 00:10:31,320
it will open with Lovemore
receiving the tragic news...
175
00:10:31,424 --> 00:10:33,771
of his untimely death.
176
00:10:33,875 --> 00:10:35,255
What?
177
00:10:35,359 --> 00:10:36,888
- Shit. I'm sorry. My smartwatch is stuck.
- Ow. Hold on.
178
00:10:36,912 --> 00:10:37,982
- I know, I know. Don't pull it.
- I know.
179
00:10:38,086 --> 00:10:39,605
It's okay. Just be real still.
180
00:10:39,606 --> 00:10:41,203
- Okay, no. No, no. That's pulling it.
- You're pulling it.
181
00:10:41,227 --> 00:10:43,816
- You're gonna rip my wig off. No, you can't...
- I'm just... I'm okay...
182
00:10:48,234 --> 00:10:49,234
Oh, my!
183
00:10:49,304 --> 00:10:50,719
- Oh, my God.
- Is he okay?
184
00:10:50,823 --> 00:10:52,445
Oh, God!
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
185
00:10:52,549 --> 00:10:55,206
- I'm so sorry.
- You're a bad person.
186
00:10:55,310 --> 00:10:59,556
Stick around for the
costume contest at 6.00 p.m.
187
00:11:00,418 --> 00:11:02,662
"If there is another book"?
188
00:11:02,766 --> 00:11:07,667
I'm investing everything
we've got into this tour, okay?
189
00:11:07,771 --> 00:11:11,222
I just don't think I have another
Dash and Lovemore adventure in me.
190
00:11:11,326 --> 00:11:12,707
How does Dash die?
191
00:11:12,810 --> 00:11:14,950
- Was it the snakes?
- No.
192
00:11:15,054 --> 00:11:17,401
Okay, so I have something
that I have to take care of.
193
00:11:17,504 --> 00:11:19,955
You guys have an interview in
the next suite in ten minutes.
194
00:11:20,059 --> 00:11:22,475
So can you please do me
a favor and be grown-ups...
195
00:11:22,579 --> 00:11:24,097
and get yourselves there on your own?
196
00:11:24,201 --> 00:11:25,409
Okay. Thank you so much.
197
00:11:26,203 --> 00:11:28,274
Does he die from
a staph infection?
198
00:11:30,241 --> 00:11:32,312
It is a staph infection.
I knew it.
199
00:11:33,486 --> 00:11:34,867
I-I... All right.
200
00:11:34,970 --> 00:11:38,042
Look, I get it if you
need a break or something,...
201
00:11:38,146 --> 00:11:40,148
- but you can't just kill me, okay?
- Okay.
202
00:11:40,251 --> 00:11:44,635
I hate that I have to ask this,
but you do know you're not Dash, right?
203
00:11:44,739 --> 00:11:46,913
Dash is a character I made up.
204
00:11:47,017 --> 00:11:48,259
Dash?
205
00:11:51,090 --> 00:11:52,332
Thanks.
206
00:11:52,436 --> 00:11:53,644
Thank you.
207
00:11:56,129 --> 00:11:58,407
- Loretta, it's this way.
- No, I think it's this way.
208
00:11:58,511 --> 00:12:00,858
Can't you see that Dash
means so much to people?
209
00:12:00,962 --> 00:12:02,826
- Means so much to you.
- Not to me.
210
00:12:02,929 --> 00:12:04,609
Well, yeah, to me,
but to other people too.
211
00:12:04,690 --> 00:12:07,658
- What about Beth?
- You know what? Beth is gonna be fine.
212
00:12:07,762 --> 00:12:11,593
She's gonna find plenty fresh,
young writers full of great ideas.
213
00:12:11,697 --> 00:12:13,699
You can transition gracefully
214
00:12:13,802 --> 00:12:16,099
into the shirt-on phase
of your modeling career,...
215
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:17,599
and I can be left alone.
216
00:12:17,703 --> 00:12:19,428
Everybody is happy.
217
00:12:19,532 --> 00:12:21,327
No, it's this way.
218
00:12:21,430 --> 00:12:23,339
Beth says you don't even
leave the house anymore.
219
00:12:23,363 --> 00:12:25,400
I don't feel like
that's very happy.
220
00:12:25,503 --> 00:12:28,482
You should be going out in the world,
filling yourself up on new experiences.
221
00:12:28,506 --> 00:12:30,750
I'm already filled up.
I'm full. I'm fully satiated.
222
00:12:30,854 --> 00:12:34,202
Why would you want to be stuck at home
alone when you could see the world?
223
00:12:34,305 --> 00:12:35,824
You could be visiting
ancient Greece.
224
00:12:35,928 --> 00:12:38,827
Okay. How could I visit
ancient Greece?
225
00:12:38,931 --> 00:12:40,967
I get it. Because
you're afraid of flying.
226
00:12:41,071 --> 00:12:44,488
No. Because ancient Greece is in the past.
227
00:12:44,591 --> 00:12:46,145
Just like Dash.
228
00:12:46,248 --> 00:12:49,458
Okay. You want to know who else
is stuck in the past? You are.
229
00:12:49,562 --> 00:12:52,323
You're so afraid of life hurting you
again that you've stopped living.
230
00:12:52,427 --> 00:12:54,740
You're like a human mummy.
231
00:12:56,224 --> 00:12:58,260
I didn't, um,...
232
00:12:59,537 --> 00:13:00,711
Oh.
233
00:13:00,815 --> 00:13:02,955
Mummies are human.
234
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,207
Stupid... Oh, crap.
235
00:13:15,277 --> 00:13:17,245
I'm so sorry.
I-I will clean this up.
236
00:13:17,348 --> 00:13:19,834
I am not a litterer,
I-I assure you that.
237
00:13:19,937 --> 00:13:23,423
Do you, um... Do you think you could,
uh, call a car for me, please?
238
00:13:23,527 --> 00:13:25,046
Thank you. Thank you.
239
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:28,981
Bring the car around.
240
00:13:29,084 --> 00:13:30,534
God, is that someone's retainer?
241
00:13:30,637 --> 00:13:32,985
I've never said the right thing
one time around her.
242
00:13:33,088 --> 00:13:35,021
I get nervous because
she opens her mouth,...
243
00:13:35,125 --> 00:13:39,577
and just an encyclopedia of beautifulness
comes out, and I just never say...
244
00:13:39,681 --> 00:13:40,993
You know, she's trying to kill me?
245
00:13:41,096 --> 00:13:43,271
I just need those tomatoes.
246
00:13:43,374 --> 00:13:45,722
You're right.
No, you're right.
247
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:47,309
I should apologize.
Thank you, man.
248
00:13:47,413 --> 00:13:49,656
- I appreciate that very, very much.
- You're welcome.
249
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:02,083
Uh, Loretta Sage. Yeah.
250
00:14:07,295 --> 00:14:08,399
Uh...
251
00:14:09,711 --> 00:14:10,919
Hiya.
252
00:14:11,023 --> 00:14:12,507
Uh, I did not order an UberPool.
253
00:14:12,610 --> 00:14:15,579
Someone wants to meet you.
We'll have you right back.
254
00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:16,856
Um...
255
00:14:20,342 --> 00:14:21,619
Loretta!
256
00:14:21,723 --> 00:14:23,242
Loretta! Loretta?
257
00:14:26,141 --> 00:14:28,005
Uh, Loretta?
258
00:14:28,109 --> 00:14:30,697
- Did you say "Loretta"?
- Yeah.
259
00:14:30,801 --> 00:14:32,009
- Follow that SUV, man.
- No.
260
00:14:32,113 --> 00:14:33,323
- Come on, please!
- No, no, no.
261
00:14:33,324 --> 00:14:37,040
I'm not helping any more handsome
strangers. Fool me once. Mmm-mmm.
262
00:14:37,152 --> 00:14:40,466
What is this, Taken?
Am I "tooken"?
263
00:14:40,569 --> 00:14:41,985
Am I sold already?
264
00:14:42,088 --> 00:14:45,091
Am I... Am I sold to him?
265
00:14:45,195 --> 00:14:48,854
- Ow. Stop.
- Oh, no. Did this feel creepy?
266
00:14:48,957 --> 00:14:51,580
I said, don't make it creepy, guys.
267
00:14:51,684 --> 00:14:53,513
I'm so sorry about the setting.
268
00:14:53,617 --> 00:14:56,206
I just flew in. I was in
a real panic to meet you.
269
00:14:56,309 --> 00:14:58,380
I didn't have time
to dress the place up much.
270
00:14:58,484 --> 00:15:01,280
I read you love cheese,
so I just got them all.
271
00:15:01,383 --> 00:15:05,456
Are you the one who's been
emailing me for photos of my feet?
272
00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:07,424
No. Um,...
273
00:15:07,527 --> 00:15:11,842
And I promise what I'm about to show
you is gonna make you very happy.
274
00:15:12,601 --> 00:15:13,810
But first, a little bit...
275
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,123
about the mysterious rogue
you see before you.
276
00:15:17,227 --> 00:15:19,505
Uh, my name is Abigail Fairfax.
277
00:15:19,608 --> 00:15:22,542
- Abigail?
- It's a gender-neutral name, like Leslie or Beverly.
278
00:15:22,646 --> 00:15:26,339
Yes, but you're Abigail Fairfax
of the media-mogul Fairfaxes?
279
00:15:27,271 --> 00:15:30,481
Didn't you just
take over your company or...
280
00:15:30,585 --> 00:15:34,520
No, that was my brother, actually.
That was Leslie. We're all very proud.
281
00:15:34,623 --> 00:15:37,730
Ah. Yes, I should say so,
at such a young age to...
282
00:15:37,834 --> 00:15:39,766
Some might even say too young.
283
00:15:39,870 --> 00:15:42,597
But that world
never really interested me.
284
00:15:42,700 --> 00:15:48,499
My passions, as you may know,
lie in the hidden things in the world,...
285
00:15:48,603 --> 00:15:51,226
things which defy possession.
286
00:15:51,330 --> 00:15:54,367
Um, some might call me a collector.
287
00:15:54,471 --> 00:16:00,373
But there is one obsession
in particular that has held me captive.
288
00:16:01,547 --> 00:16:03,031
The Crown of Fire...
289
00:16:03,135 --> 00:16:05,516
and its cascading red diamonds.
290
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:09,279
Is this a...
Is this a hidden-camera thing?
291
00:16:09,382 --> 00:16:12,972
So imagine my surprise when,
in your new book,...
292
00:16:13,076 --> 00:16:16,355
amidst the pages
of coital reverie,...
293
00:16:16,458 --> 00:16:17,287
was something...
294
00:16:17,390 --> 00:16:19,461
- Oh, God.
- ...quite magnificent.
295
00:16:21,325 --> 00:16:23,880
I get it. I get it.
I so get it right now.
296
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,295
Oh, my gosh.
297
00:16:25,398 --> 00:16:27,573
I literally thought
you guys kidnapped me.
298
00:16:27,676 --> 00:16:30,162
I mean, this is marketing, right?
Beth set this up?
299
00:16:30,265 --> 00:16:33,165
This was so good, you guys.
This was amazing.
300
00:16:33,268 --> 00:16:38,723
You, with your gun and your mustache
and your, "You'd better get in there.",...
301
00:16:38,724 --> 00:16:39,585
and you know, but...
302
00:16:39,588 --> 00:16:40,622
Oh, my God.
303
00:16:40,793 --> 00:16:42,312
Oh, my God.
304
00:16:42,415 --> 00:16:46,178
You, with the G.I. Joe
tone-on-tone outfit.
305
00:16:46,281 --> 00:16:51,286
Your fictional archaeologist was making
real translations of a dead language.
306
00:16:51,390 --> 00:16:53,999
- Mmm-hmm.
- Something nobody else has been able to do.
307
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,809
Well, nobody else had ever tried.
308
00:16:56,913 --> 00:16:58,742
Is that right?
Am I saying the right thing?
309
00:16:58,845 --> 00:17:00,502
Except you, right?
310
00:17:00,606 --> 00:17:02,573
Except... Except me!
311
00:17:02,677 --> 00:17:04,403
Yes. See, it turns out...
312
00:17:04,506 --> 00:17:07,820
Loretta Sage was once a young
college girl doing her dissertation
313
00:17:07,924 --> 00:17:10,788
on the dead language of the D
with her future husband,...
314
00:17:10,892 --> 00:17:13,999
dreaming of finding Kalaman's
tomb and the Crown of Fire.
315
00:17:14,102 --> 00:17:17,209
I was sorry to read you gave
up your search after he died.
316
00:17:17,312 --> 00:17:22,110
But what that means is,
you're all I have left.
317
00:17:22,214 --> 00:17:25,389
All-All you have left for... what?
318
00:17:25,493 --> 00:17:26,528
Hmm.
319
00:17:28,323 --> 00:17:29,566
Oh.
320
00:17:29,669 --> 00:17:31,050
Here we go.
321
00:17:45,168 --> 00:17:46,280
What is this?
322
00:17:46,490 --> 00:17:50,690
I believe it is describing the
exact location of Kalaman's tomb,
323
00:17:50,794 --> 00:17:54,246
in which Taha and her
priceless headdress are buried.
324
00:17:54,349 --> 00:17:56,489
Well, if this were authentic,...
325
00:17:56,593 --> 00:18:01,943
you would still have to
uncover an entire city...
326
00:18:02,047 --> 00:18:05,084
that nobody has been able to find.
327
00:18:05,188 --> 00:18:06,844
I found it.
328
00:18:06,948 --> 00:18:10,089
On a tiny, forgotten island in
the Atlantic called Isla Hundida.
329
00:18:10,193 --> 00:18:13,748
What I have not been able to find
is Kalaman's final resting place.
330
00:18:13,851 --> 00:18:18,132
This piece of parchment
is the only clue we found among the ruins.
331
00:18:18,235 --> 00:18:23,551
I need someone who can decipher
these symbols. I need you.
332
00:18:24,690 --> 00:18:26,140
- Well,...
- Miss Sage,...
333
00:18:26,243 --> 00:18:29,626
surely this isn't how
you want your story to end.
334
00:18:29,729 --> 00:18:32,841
We both had our dreams crushed
by bad luck, or in my case,...
335
00:18:32,842 --> 00:18:34,665
an arse-kissing little brother,
336
00:18:34,769 --> 00:18:37,675
but this is our chance
to show them all.
337
00:18:37,699 --> 00:18:39,567
Come with me... to the island.
338
00:18:39,670 --> 00:18:44,813
Translate these symbols and
help me find the Crown of Fire.
339
00:18:44,917 --> 00:18:47,540
You can name your price.
340
00:18:50,164 --> 00:18:52,994
I must respectfully decline.
341
00:18:57,861 --> 00:18:59,069
Well,...
342
00:19:00,691 --> 00:19:02,659
I can't say I'm not disappointed.
343
00:19:02,856 --> 00:19:06,042
But I understand how you feel.
344
00:19:09,390 --> 00:19:11,150
Will you at least let us give you a ride?
345
00:19:11,254 --> 00:19:15,534
Oh, no, thank you.
I'll call for my own car, and I'll just...
346
00:19:37,107 --> 00:19:40,869
I don't feel like you're listening to me.
This is urgent, and we...
347
00:19:40,973 --> 00:19:43,907
Okay, so the police are saying
that they put out an APB...
348
00:19:44,010 --> 00:19:45,659
APB... on an SUV,...
349
00:19:45,660 --> 00:19:47,899
- and there's this 24-hour rule...
- Why is there a rule?
350
00:19:47,900 --> 00:19:50,409
- and they won't do anything until...
- What about the FBI or the CIA?
351
00:19:50,410 --> 00:19:52,485
- They said to call the police.
- I'm sure Loretta's fine.
352
00:19:52,486 --> 00:19:55,298
When I was in college,
my friend Nicki went missing.
353
00:19:55,401 --> 00:19:57,023
Everyone was, like, freaking out.
354
00:19:57,127 --> 00:19:59,474
But then she was just in her car.
355
00:19:59,578 --> 00:20:02,753
She was dead, but we found her.
She wasn't gone.
356
00:20:02,857 --> 00:20:07,206
Um, what about...
Maybe we could get a PI...
357
00:20:07,310 --> 00:20:09,829
or, like, you know,
private security or...
358
00:20:09,933 --> 00:20:12,831
- What about an extraction team, like the movie?
- Yes! But who does that?
359
00:20:12,832 --> 00:20:14,420
The ex-military, right?
360
00:20:14,524 --> 00:20:17,113
Oh, yeah. I think I actually
have somebody that could help us.
361
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:20,185
- Oh.
- I did this meditation retreat,...
362
00:20:20,288 --> 00:20:23,980
and there was this trainer guy there.
You should see this guy meditate.
363
00:20:24,085 --> 00:20:25,500
But he's ex-Navy SEAL.
364
00:20:25,604 --> 00:20:29,401
He... He's a special ops trainer.
What was his name?
365
00:20:30,091 --> 00:20:31,230
Yeah. Jack Trainer.
366
00:20:31,334 --> 00:20:32,956
So he's a trainer
named Jack Trainer?
367
00:20:33,059 --> 00:20:35,314
That's how I have everybody in my phone.
See, "Janice Mom."
368
00:20:35,338 --> 00:20:36,787
"Larry Doorknob."
"Stacy Butt Stuff."
369
00:20:36,891 --> 00:20:39,583
Look, this is what this guy does.
He finds people.
370
00:20:39,687 --> 00:20:41,965
If there's anybody
that can help us, it's him.
371
00:20:48,903 --> 00:20:51,423
- Jack Trainer.
- Oh, so his name is actually Jack Trainer.
372
00:20:51,526 --> 00:20:55,427
Hi, uh, this is Alan
from "Touching Your Inner Self."
373
00:20:56,911 --> 00:20:58,740
The meditation retreat?
374
00:21:00,466 --> 00:21:03,538
Anyway, uh, okay. Our friend
Loretta has been kidnapped,...
375
00:21:03,642 --> 00:21:05,091
and no one's helping us.
376
00:21:05,195 --> 00:21:06,679
How long she been missing?
377
00:21:06,783 --> 00:21:08,025
Maybe two hours now.
378
00:21:08,129 --> 00:21:09,441
Who is that?
379
00:21:09,544 --> 00:21:13,583
Um, this is B...
This is Beth. I'm Beth.
380
00:21:13,686 --> 00:21:16,102
And Allison is on too, sir.
381
00:21:16,206 --> 00:21:18,415
Did she have any
Wi-Fi-enabled devices?
382
00:21:18,519 --> 00:21:21,418
- She's got her phone, right?
- No, I have her phone.
383
00:21:21,522 --> 00:21:24,145
Oh! She has a smartwatch.
It ripped my wig off.
384
00:21:24,249 --> 00:21:27,183
What was that scenario?
Never mind. Open the phone.
385
00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:28,839
- Go to the smartwatch app.
- All right. All right.
386
00:21:28,943 --> 00:21:31,256
Then hit "Find My Smartwatch."
387
00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:34,293
Oh, my... That is so good.
That's why we called.
388
00:21:34,397 --> 00:21:36,847
"Anticipate the difficult
by managing the easy."
389
00:21:36,951 --> 00:21:40,644
- Is that Oprah or Deepak?
- Laozi from Tao-te Ching.
390
00:21:40,748 --> 00:21:41,956
Oh, my God.
391
00:21:42,059 --> 00:21:43,751
It's in the Atlantic.
392
00:21:43,854 --> 00:21:46,202
- She's on a plane?
- How can you tell that?
393
00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:48,480
'Cause she can't swim that fast.
394
00:21:48,583 --> 00:21:50,033
Doesn't sound like
a ransom scenario.
395
00:21:50,136 --> 00:21:52,760
My guess is blood sport,
Hunger Games type situation.
396
00:21:52,863 --> 00:21:55,694
Possibly some coke-fueled
dark web scavenger hunt.
397
00:21:55,797 --> 00:21:57,834
Real clown shit.
We'll have to move fast.
398
00:21:57,937 --> 00:22:00,871
- How do we pay you?
- Cryptocurrency. Cash App.
399
00:22:00,975 --> 00:22:04,461
I'll have her back within 48 hours
or your next rescue is free.
400
00:22:04,565 --> 00:22:06,049
How many people
need a next rescue?
401
00:22:06,152 --> 00:22:07,571
More than you'd think.
402
00:22:07,572 --> 00:22:09,684
- I'm gonna need that phone.
- I'll bring it to you.
403
00:22:09,708 --> 00:22:12,469
Let me know where she lands.
I'll meet you there, Alan.
404
00:22:27,277 --> 00:22:28,520
Hello.
405
00:22:33,110 --> 00:22:34,250
Where am I?
406
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:36,355
Um, you're on my plane.
407
00:22:36,459 --> 00:22:37,667
It's nice, isn't it? Hmm?
408
00:22:37,770 --> 00:22:39,600
The seats are made of
mama llama leather.
409
00:22:39,703 --> 00:22:42,810
Well, I'm getting off your plane.
410
00:22:42,913 --> 00:22:44,294
Unchain me!
411
00:22:44,398 --> 00:22:45,951
That's your seat belt.
412
00:22:46,538 --> 00:22:48,402
Did you chloroform me?
413
00:22:48,505 --> 00:22:50,714
People actually do that?
414
00:22:53,096 --> 00:22:55,754
Well, you know,
it's a classic for a reason.
415
00:22:56,444 --> 00:22:57,687
My body feels drunk.
416
00:22:57,790 --> 00:22:59,689
It'll wear off in a bit.
I am sorry.
417
00:22:59,792 --> 00:23:02,208
I just couldn't wait around
for you to change your mind.
418
00:23:02,312 --> 00:23:04,763
- Stop playing jelly.
- Time is not on our side.
419
00:23:04,866 --> 00:23:07,593
You see, the volcano
we're excavating around...
420
00:23:07,697 --> 00:23:09,664
has developed
a bad case of indigestion.
421
00:23:09,768 --> 00:23:11,632
I'm rather worried
that when it blows,...
422
00:23:11,735 --> 00:23:13,886
everything that's left of the
Lost City will be destroyed.
423
00:23:13,910 --> 00:23:15,808
Oh, my God.
My legs don't work.
424
00:23:15,912 --> 00:23:21,331
So, this is our last chance to
find both the tomb and the crown.
425
00:23:21,435 --> 00:23:23,471
- Oh, God.
- Oh!
426
00:23:23,575 --> 00:23:25,853
Don't worry.
That's just our final descent.
427
00:23:25,956 --> 00:23:31,962
But it is the beginning of the
greatest adventure of your life.
428
00:24:40,583 --> 00:24:42,654
Welcome to the Lost City.
429
00:24:52,284 --> 00:24:53,699
How did you find it?
430
00:24:53,803 --> 00:24:55,943
So, the city was built
on a lava dome.
431
00:24:56,046 --> 00:24:58,739
As the volcano became active,
the dome filled with lava,...
432
00:24:58,842 --> 00:25:01,466
and sunken things
rose to the surface.
433
00:25:01,569 --> 00:25:03,468
The D exposed itself.
434
00:25:03,571 --> 00:25:06,609
- The entire city?
- No, no. Just the tip.
435
00:25:06,712 --> 00:25:09,922
As soon as I heard rumors of the ruins,
I flew over and bought the place.
436
00:25:10,026 --> 00:25:13,305
- The site?
- No. The island. The southern half.
437
00:25:13,409 --> 00:25:15,756
I got a good deal 'cause
this is where the lava flows.
438
00:25:15,859 --> 00:25:18,103
We've been excavating
for a year now.
439
00:25:19,173 --> 00:25:21,727
One doesn't kidnap
a romance novelist on day one.
440
00:25:21,831 --> 00:25:23,867
Ah, yes, as the saying goes.
441
00:25:23,971 --> 00:25:26,974
Rafi doesn't like it.
Do you, Rafi?
442
00:25:27,077 --> 00:25:30,253
He says we're disrespecting his heritage.
443
00:25:30,356 --> 00:25:33,601
But not a lot of other job options
on the island, are there, Rafi?
444
00:25:33,705 --> 00:25:35,776
Beggars can't be choosers.
445
00:25:45,613 --> 00:25:47,443
No more charcuterie, I take it.
446
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:49,652
Mmm. Please.
I'm not a monster.
447
00:25:49,755 --> 00:25:51,585
Whatever you need, just shout.
448
00:25:53,103 --> 00:25:57,970
Uh, leave one hand free.
She has some translating to do.
449
00:25:59,178 --> 00:26:00,421
And then what?
450
00:26:00,525 --> 00:26:03,044
Loretta, I really wish
you would try and see
451
00:26:03,148 --> 00:26:05,288
what an exciting
opportunity this is for us.
452
00:26:05,391 --> 00:26:09,292
I believe this text describes
the exact location of the tomb.
453
00:26:09,395 --> 00:26:11,915
It's a logographic system.
454
00:26:12,675 --> 00:26:15,263
Like cuneiform or hieroglyphics.
455
00:26:15,367 --> 00:26:19,164
Now, if you have other documents
that possibly I can compare...
456
00:26:19,267 --> 00:26:20,545
Yeah, no luck there.
457
00:26:20,648 --> 00:26:23,444
We found some scratching
at a nearby waterfall,...
458
00:26:23,548 --> 00:26:24,445
but it was useless.
459
00:26:24,549 --> 00:26:26,099
Just pictures of women.
460
00:26:26,100 --> 00:26:30,796
Look, I, too, wish your dear
old dead archaeologist husband
461
00:26:30,900 --> 00:26:33,627
was here to help,
but he's not, so,...
462
00:26:33,730 --> 00:26:36,837
time to shine, Loretta,
sex-book writer.
463
00:26:38,252 --> 00:26:39,978
They will come for me.
464
00:26:40,565 --> 00:26:42,290
Who, exactly?
465
00:26:42,394 --> 00:26:44,120
Your... Your many cats?
466
00:26:44,223 --> 00:26:46,018
Oh, I don't have cats.
467
00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:48,434
Somehow even more sad.
468
00:26:48,538 --> 00:26:51,279
I have a hamster, asshole!
469
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:53,269
You have a hamster's asshole?
470
00:26:53,399 --> 00:26:57,244
No, there was a... there was a com... urgh...
there was a comma between... Forget it.
471
00:26:57,245 --> 00:27:00,654
I bet your brother never had
to kidnap anyone!
472
00:27:32,375 --> 00:27:35,654
♪ From the dusty mesa ♪
473
00:27:35,758 --> 00:27:40,072
♪ Her looming shadow grows ♪
474
00:27:40,176 --> 00:27:47,735
♪ Hidden in the branches
of the poison creosote ♪
475
00:27:51,394 --> 00:27:52,982
Good to see you, man.
476
00:27:53,085 --> 00:27:54,708
- Phone.
- Right.
477
00:28:06,582 --> 00:28:07,824
What?
478
00:28:07,928 --> 00:28:10,516
Yeah, I was thinking
that I could, you know,
479
00:28:10,620 --> 00:28:12,208
maybe just sort of
come with you.
480
00:28:12,311 --> 00:28:14,072
- Why?
- To help.
481
00:28:14,175 --> 00:28:18,317
I know CPR. I know some light karate.
CrossFit certified.
482
00:28:18,421 --> 00:28:19,940
Okay, okay, listen, listen!
483
00:28:20,803 --> 00:28:22,494
I just... It's my fault.
484
00:28:22,598 --> 00:28:24,703
Not the kidnapping and stuff,
485
00:28:24,807 --> 00:28:27,879
but, like, I said some really mean
stuff to her, and I regret it,...
486
00:28:27,982 --> 00:28:29,605
and I just need to take it back.
487
00:28:29,708 --> 00:28:31,089
I called her a human mummy.
488
00:28:32,435 --> 00:28:33,850
Mummies are human.
489
00:28:34,360 --> 00:28:36,922
I-I'm aware of that now, yes.
490
00:28:37,026 --> 00:28:40,063
That is true.
491
00:28:40,167 --> 00:28:41,168
Please.
492
00:28:42,445 --> 00:28:45,137
All right, Alan, I can't
be responsible for you.
493
00:28:46,104 --> 00:28:47,105
Okay. Yeah.
494
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:50,139
- I need you to stay in the car.
- Yeah.
495
00:28:50,140 --> 00:28:52,259
- In the car.
- In the car.
496
00:28:52,260 --> 00:28:54,799
- The whole time.
- The whole time?
497
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:56,286
Whole time.
498
00:28:56,390 --> 00:28:57,633
Mmm-hmm.
499
00:28:59,393 --> 00:29:00,670
Yes!
500
00:29:07,608 --> 00:29:08,954
This is me.
501
00:29:09,852 --> 00:29:12,130
Really? Is this what
the SEAL teams use?
502
00:29:12,233 --> 00:29:14,891
"Only a fool chooses a horse by its color."
503
00:29:14,995 --> 00:29:17,791
Right, right.
The Tao-te Ching?
504
00:29:17,894 --> 00:29:21,035
No, it was on the sign
back there at the rental place.
505
00:29:29,561 --> 00:29:30,769
Thank you.
506
00:29:35,299 --> 00:29:39,099
♪ I once had a life, or rather ♪
507
00:29:39,100 --> 00:29:41,261
♪ Life had me ♪
508
00:29:41,262 --> 00:29:44,499
♪ I was one among many ♪
509
00:29:44,500 --> 00:29:47,919
♪ Or at least I seemed to be ♪
510
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:54,859
♪ Well, I read an old quotation
in a book just yesterday ♪
511
00:29:54,860 --> 00:29:57,899
♪ Said, "gonna reap just what you sow ♪
512
00:29:57,900 --> 00:30:01,299
♪ The debts you make you have to pay" ♪
513
00:30:01,300 --> 00:30:02,900
♪ Can you get to that? ♪
514
00:30:03,595 --> 00:30:05,045
What? What?
515
00:30:07,288 --> 00:30:09,290
I was hoping to invite you
to breakfast,...
516
00:30:09,394 --> 00:30:12,052
but it looks like
you still have work to do.
517
00:30:13,018 --> 00:30:14,779
Uh, wait, wait, wait.
518
00:30:14,882 --> 00:30:16,401
Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
519
00:30:16,504 --> 00:30:18,506
I believe this says,...
520
00:30:18,610 --> 00:30:20,612
"rest" or "resting".
521
00:30:20,716 --> 00:30:23,615
So, it would be,
"Kalaman and his treasure..."
522
00:30:23,719 --> 00:30:28,206
And then there are some missing
pieces, and then "rest", "resting",...
523
00:30:28,309 --> 00:30:31,727
and something about
"tears", so...
524
00:30:33,521 --> 00:30:34,522
Resting where?
525
00:30:34,626 --> 00:30:35,834
Hmm? Oh!
526
00:30:35,938 --> 00:30:38,699
D-Didn't say.
It doesn't say.
527
00:30:40,045 --> 00:30:43,048
Miss Sage,
I need you to do better.
528
00:30:43,152 --> 00:30:46,603
Then next time maybe don't
kidnap a romance novelist, hmm?
529
00:30:46,707 --> 00:30:48,916
My God, this shouldn't be this hard!
530
00:30:49,020 --> 00:30:50,953
It is not some pauper's grave
we're looking for.
531
00:30:51,056 --> 00:30:53,334
It is a monument to a great man!
532
00:30:53,438 --> 00:30:55,371
King Kalaman was ambitious,
he was powerful,...
533
00:30:55,474 --> 00:30:57,925
he was the first man to
build a city in the Atlantic.
534
00:30:58,029 --> 00:31:00,686
The eyes of his subjects
would have turned to him.
535
00:31:00,790 --> 00:31:06,106
He would have had a pyramid,
a ziggurat, a tower to hold his Crown of Fire.
536
00:31:06,209 --> 00:31:09,109
All I need to know is where it is.
537
00:31:09,212 --> 00:31:12,457
I don't know if you recall,
but you only said translate it.
538
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,700
I-I translated it.
539
00:31:15,494 --> 00:31:17,082
Translate it again.
540
00:31:22,708 --> 00:31:25,746
One day, we're gonna
laugh about this.
541
00:31:25,850 --> 00:31:27,990
Such an adventure we're having.
542
00:31:31,096 --> 00:31:35,445
I should go with you,
just for backup and awesomeness.
543
00:31:36,412 --> 00:31:38,069
This is pretty awesome.
544
00:31:38,172 --> 00:31:40,830
You got nature, the radio.
545
00:31:41,969 --> 00:31:45,593
Yeah, you're right,
but it's very, very important to me...
546
00:31:45,697 --> 00:31:47,561
that she knows that I came to rescue her.
547
00:31:47,664 --> 00:31:49,356
Why? Do you like this woman?
548
00:31:50,357 --> 00:31:52,566
N-No, I just brought snacks and stuff.
549
00:31:52,669 --> 00:31:54,844
And she gets a little grumpy
when she's hungry.
550
00:31:54,948 --> 00:31:58,365
Blood pressure drops... and I get that
because I'm a five-meal-a-day kind of guy.
551
00:31:58,468 --> 00:32:01,044
Do you keto, by the way?
You look like you keto.
552
00:32:01,045 --> 00:32:03,059
- No.
- No. No. Yeah.
553
00:32:03,163 --> 00:32:04,889
You don't need it.
554
00:32:04,992 --> 00:32:06,476
What is it?
555
00:32:06,580 --> 00:32:10,170
I just want her to think of me
as more than a cover model.
556
00:32:10,273 --> 00:32:14,519
But, Alan, you are so much more.
You're my lookout.
557
00:32:14,622 --> 00:32:17,971
Okay, can I at least do the part
where I put her in the car...
558
00:32:18,074 --> 00:32:21,802
and I just go, "Shh. You're safe now."?
559
00:32:22,872 --> 00:32:24,874
Sure, champ.
She'll love that.
560
00:32:24,978 --> 00:32:26,842
Oh, you're just going?
Going to start?
561
00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:29,361
You're starting
the mission now? Okay.
562
00:32:53,528 --> 00:32:55,749
Argh! Oh!
563
00:33:04,550 --> 00:33:05,994
- ♪ Take a little walk... ♪
- Go to sleep.
564
00:33:05,995 --> 00:33:07,849
♪ ...to the edge of town ♪
565
00:33:07,850 --> 00:33:10,684
♪ And go across the tracks ♪
566
00:33:12,230 --> 00:33:16,339
♪ Where the viaduct looms
like a bird of doom ♪
567
00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:20,549
♪ As it shifts and cracks ♪
568
00:33:20,550 --> 00:33:24,714
♪ Where secrets lie in the border fires ♪
569
00:33:24,715 --> 00:33:26,539
♪ In the humming wires ♪
570
00:33:26,540 --> 00:33:29,883
♪ Hey man, you know ya never coming back ♪
571
00:33:29,884 --> 00:33:32,049
♪ Past the square, past the bridge ♪
572
00:33:32,050 --> 00:33:35,012
♪ Past the mills, past the stacks ♪
573
00:33:35,117 --> 00:33:36,256
- Alan.
- What?
574
00:33:36,359 --> 00:33:38,229
- This is a breach of trust, Alan.
- ♪ On a gathering... ♪
575
00:33:38,230 --> 00:33:41,259
- Come on, I can help. Let me help.
- ♪ ...storm comes a tall handsome man ♪
576
00:33:41,260 --> 00:33:43,129
♪ In a dusty black coat... ♪
577
00:33:43,130 --> 00:33:45,850
- Stay close. Stay alive.
- ♪ ...with a red right hand ♪
578
00:33:50,684 --> 00:33:51,926
Hey.
579
00:33:54,220 --> 00:33:56,759
♪ He'll wrap you in his arms ♪
580
00:33:56,860 --> 00:34:00,659
- Go to sleep.
- ♪ Tell you that you've been a good boy ♪
581
00:34:00,763 --> 00:34:04,450
I g-got his head. What do I do with his head?
I'm just gonna set him down.
582
00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:04,979
{\an8}♪ He'll rekindle all the dreams ♪
583
00:34:04,980 --> 00:34:10,200
{\an8}♪ That took you a lifetime to destroy ♪
584
00:34:10,815 --> 00:34:12,219
- ♪ He'll reach deep... ♪
- Nuh-uh. No.
585
00:34:12,220 --> 00:34:13,629
- ♪ ...into the hole ♪
- Hey, hey, hey, no!
586
00:34:13,630 --> 00:34:15,499
- ♪ Heal your shrinking soul ♪
- No, no, no, no!
587
00:34:15,500 --> 00:34:19,644
♪ But there won't be
a single thing that you can do ♪
588
00:34:19,747 --> 00:34:21,685
♪ He's a God, he's a man ♪
589
00:34:21,686 --> 00:34:24,680
- ♪ He's a ghost, he's a guru ♪
- Ooh, yeah! Ooh.
590
00:34:24,790 --> 00:34:25,785
Ow.
591
00:34:25,857 --> 00:34:27,764
- Teamwork, yeah!
- ♪ They're whispering... ♪
592
00:34:27,765 --> 00:34:30,800
Great effort, Alan, but that man
was already unconscious.
593
00:34:27,765 --> 00:34:28,899
{\an8}♪ ...his name ♪
594
00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:31,209
{\an8}♪ Through this disappearing hand ♪
595
00:34:31,210 --> 00:34:33,199
- ♪ But hidden in his coat... ♪
- I was already wound up.
596
00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:36,281
- ♪ ...is a red right hand ♪
- Just don't do it when I am.
597
00:34:39,353 --> 00:34:40,420
Hi.
598
00:34:43,590 --> 00:34:45,949
- ♪ You don't have no money? ♪
- Oh!
599
00:34:45,950 --> 00:34:48,999
- ♪ He'll get you some ♪
- On your seven!
600
00:34:52,235 --> 00:34:54,525
- ♪ You don't have no car? ♪
- Oh!
601
00:34:55,720 --> 00:34:57,600
♪ He'll get you one ♪
602
00:34:58,303 --> 00:35:00,236
Trainer... Trainer, he's not asleep!
603
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:03,424
- Stay... Stay down. Stay down.
- ♪ You don't have no self-respect? ♪
604
00:35:03,425 --> 00:35:05,199
♪ You feel like an insect? ♪
605
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:07,692
- You're doing great.
- Thanks.
606
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:09,789
{\an8}♪ Well, don't you worry, buddy,
'cause here he comes ♪
607
00:35:07,795 --> 00:35:09,314
Where you going?
608
00:35:09,790 --> 00:35:12,109
{\an8}♪ Through the ghettos and the barrio ♪
609
00:35:12,110 --> 00:35:14,860
{\an8}♪ And the bowery and the slum ♪
610
00:35:12,900 --> 00:35:14,700
What? Huh?
611
00:35:17,460 --> 00:35:18,944
Loretta Sage?
612
00:35:19,428 --> 00:35:20,222
Yes.
613
00:35:20,325 --> 00:35:22,189
I'm getting you out of here.
614
00:35:23,225 --> 00:35:26,262
- Why are you so handsome?
- My dad was a weatherman.
615
00:35:28,199 --> 00:35:29,300
A-Alan?
616
00:35:29,403 --> 00:35:31,440
- Yeah.
- What are you doing here?
617
00:35:31,543 --> 00:35:34,339
- Uh, irregardless, I'm here to save you.
- That's not...
618
00:35:34,443 --> 00:35:36,686
- I think he meant "regardless".
- Yes.
619
00:35:38,102 --> 00:35:42,071
Ooh, uh, does she need saving in there, Trainer?
L-Look, look... I think she's fine there.
620
00:35:42,175 --> 00:35:45,350
No, no, leave it. Don't take their stuff.
They'll come after us.
621
00:35:48,008 --> 00:35:49,561
Alan, why do you
keep doing that?
622
00:35:49,665 --> 00:35:51,632
Why do you keep doing that?
I had that one.
623
00:35:51,736 --> 00:35:54,255
It's just getting mean now.
It's unnecessary.
624
00:35:54,256 --> 00:35:56,119
- I'm sorry. I just wanted to get one in.
- Okay.
625
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:58,749
Excuse me. Would it be possible
to remove me from the chair?
626
00:35:58,750 --> 00:36:01,909
- No time.
- No time? Uh... There's been so much chitchat.
627
00:36:01,910 --> 00:36:03,230
We should definitely go.
628
00:36:03,260 --> 00:36:03,859
- Let's go! Let's go!
- Let's go!
629
00:36:03,860 --> 00:36:08,119
♪ We're running with
the shadows of the night ♪
630
00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:12,399
♪ So baby, take my hand,
you'll be all right ♪
631
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:17,600
♪ They'll come true in the end ♪
632
00:36:30,809 --> 00:36:31,948
Why are things exploding?
633
00:36:39,611 --> 00:36:40,647
I got...
634
00:36:42,304 --> 00:36:43,512
Okay.
635
00:36:44,409 --> 00:36:47,688
- Shh—
- Shh. You're safe now.
636
00:36:47,792 --> 00:36:48,931
You're...
637
00:36:49,034 --> 00:36:51,175
How... How are you so calm?
638
00:36:51,278 --> 00:36:53,763
- That was my... That was my line.
- Here you go.
639
00:36:55,903 --> 00:36:57,802
What? Is that Reiki?
640
00:36:57,905 --> 00:37:00,356
- Are you healing me?
- I think so.
641
00:37:00,460 --> 00:37:03,670
- Ah.
- As Laozi says, "To the mind that is still,...
642
00:37:03,773 --> 00:37:06,549
- the whole universe surrenders."
- Hey, yeah, I know some...
643
00:37:06,550 --> 00:37:09,572
I know some, um, quotes that
could be good for this moment.
644
00:37:09,676 --> 00:37:11,402
In omnia paratus.
645
00:37:12,299 --> 00:37:14,163
"Ready for anything."
646
00:37:14,267 --> 00:37:16,999
Maybe we shouldn't be just staring
lovingly into each other's eyes...
647
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:20,480
like you're gonna fall in love
and like I'm... like I'm not here.
648
00:37:20,699 --> 00:37:21,999
Who are you?
649
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:24,829
Just a guy trying to do his job.
650
00:37:24,932 --> 00:37:27,728
And right now, that job
is to get this lovely lady—
651
00:37:28,250 --> 00:37:30,075
Oh! Oh.
652
00:37:30,179 --> 00:37:32,077
- Oh! Oh, God. Okay.
- Arghhh! Uh-huh?!
653
00:37:33,251 --> 00:37:35,460
No! What is happening?!
654
00:37:38,912 --> 00:37:40,879
- Ho!
- Okay. What do we do?
655
00:37:40,983 --> 00:37:43,088
We need to do... I can't see.
656
00:37:43,192 --> 00:37:44,607
I don't like it!
657
00:37:44,711 --> 00:37:46,195
Here. Here!
658
00:37:46,299 --> 00:37:48,749
- Why would you throw a gun?
- Seriously?
659
00:37:50,130 --> 00:37:52,960
- Get me out of the chair. Give me...
- I can't. We don't have time.
660
00:37:56,516 --> 00:37:58,587
Gotta squeeze! Squeeze!
You got to do a Kegel or something!
661
00:37:58,690 --> 00:38:01,072
- Kegel it!
- What do you think a Kegel is?
662
00:38:01,176 --> 00:38:03,557
I'm not in it, not in!
Still not in!
663
00:38:03,661 --> 00:38:06,042
- You got to go in more.
- Stop. Stop. Stop it!
664
00:38:06,146 --> 00:38:08,148
Argh!
Oh, oh, oh!
665
00:38:08,252 --> 00:38:11,772
Oh, God. Get in the car, get in the car,
get in the car! Start the car! Start the car!
666
00:38:11,876 --> 00:38:13,153
- Go, go.
- Move your leg.
667
00:38:13,257 --> 00:38:15,550
- Which one?
- Both of them! Move them!
668
00:38:17,770 --> 00:38:18,980
- Go!
- Oops!
669
00:38:19,310 --> 00:38:21,299
- Forward, forward!
- Okay. Okay. Okay.
670
00:38:21,403 --> 00:38:25,717
- I'm going! I'm going! Okay!
- Go, go, go! Drive!
671
00:38:26,856 --> 00:38:30,481
Shh. You're safe now. Shh.
672
00:38:32,137 --> 00:38:33,518
Ow.
673
00:38:33,622 --> 00:38:35,762
- Shh. You're safe now.
- No, I'm not. Not safe.
674
00:38:35,860 --> 00:38:37,626
Oh! Oh, no, am I bleeding?
675
00:38:37,729 --> 00:38:40,732
- I don't think that's yours.
- Oh, no, that's a lot of blood.
676
00:38:42,044 --> 00:38:43,773
Cheese and rice!
677
00:38:43,774 --> 00:38:45,461
- Oh, are those his brains?
- What?
678
00:38:45,462 --> 00:38:47,532
I think his brains
are on my face!
679
00:38:47,636 --> 00:38:51,260
Definitely his brains are in my mouth.
I can taste his thoughts!
680
00:38:51,364 --> 00:38:52,572
Focus on the road.
681
00:38:52,675 --> 00:38:54,815
He just liked training people. Trainer.
682
00:38:54,919 --> 00:38:57,784
- What are you talking about?
- He-He loved me.
683
00:38:57,887 --> 00:39:00,476
Can you just scooch the car
over to the left?
684
00:39:00,580 --> 00:39:04,308
- Alright. Get it off. Get it off.
- Oh, God. Oh.
685
00:39:04,411 --> 00:39:05,688
Watch out!
686
00:39:09,899 --> 00:39:12,799
Oh! Oh! Oh!
687
00:39:15,042 --> 00:39:16,803
Loretta, did you see...
688
00:39:19,771 --> 00:39:20,807
No.
689
00:39:26,226 --> 00:39:27,538
Oh.
690
00:39:28,987 --> 00:39:31,300
Oh, no. Oh, no.
691
00:39:31,852 --> 00:39:33,337
Oh, no.
692
00:39:41,759 --> 00:39:43,112
Oh, no.
693
00:39:43,799 --> 00:39:44,462
Alan.
694
00:39:45,901 --> 00:39:49,491
Oh, holy Christmas.
Are you okay? Are you okay?
695
00:39:49,594 --> 00:39:51,565
Do you think you could
get me out of here?
696
00:39:51,566 --> 00:39:53,320
Y-Yeah. Um, okay.
697
00:39:53,426 --> 00:39:56,325
- You just flew out of the car.
- I did. I did, indeed.
698
00:39:56,429 --> 00:39:59,477
- Okay. I got you. I got you.
- C-Can you get me out of the chair?
699
00:39:59,478 --> 00:40:00,419
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Get me out...
700
00:40:00,420 --> 00:40:02,666
- You're right.You're right. You're right.
- ...of the chair.
701
00:40:03,712 --> 00:40:05,404
- Is that... Is that a nail filer?
- Yeah.
702
00:40:05,405 --> 00:40:07,129
- Can you just rip it?
- It's working.
703
00:40:07,220 --> 00:40:10,979
Maybe next time I toss a gun at you,
you can catch it instead of ducking.
704
00:40:10,980 --> 00:40:14,319
How about the next time you toss a gun
at me, you say, "Hey, Alan, catch!"?
705
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,311
And then, you know,
maybe do that before you throw it?
706
00:40:16,410 --> 00:40:18,521
Well, "here" is a synonym for "catch".
707
00:40:18,522 --> 00:40:22,499
- No, "here" is not a cinnamon for "catch".
- Okay, in a colloquial kind of way, yes, it is.
708
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:24,525
- No!
- You say, "Here", I toss you a sweatshirt.
709
00:40:24,526 --> 00:40:29,807
- You say, "Here", I toss you a pen.
- How 'bout just, "Hey! Catch! Gun!"
710
00:40:29,910 --> 00:40:32,913
Anything that you want to throw,
I'll catch it because of you said, "Catch".
711
00:40:33,017 --> 00:40:34,777
And I'll catch it
because you said it.
712
00:40:34,881 --> 00:40:37,297
That is also an option,
and then we would have a gun with us.
713
00:40:37,401 --> 00:40:38,505
That's-That's a thing.
714
00:40:38,609 --> 00:40:40,887
- Be careful.
- Okay, we need to call...
715
00:40:40,990 --> 00:40:42,647
Be careful.
716
00:40:42,751 --> 00:40:45,271
We need to call for help,
get to the airport and get out of here.
717
00:40:45,374 --> 00:40:47,376
- And I am driving.
- Okay.
718
00:40:49,180 --> 00:40:52,450
- Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh! Oh, oh, oh!
- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh!
719
00:41:02,184 --> 00:41:04,566
Okay, call for... call for help.
720
00:41:04,659 --> 00:41:06,464
W-Where's your phone?
721
00:41:09,827 --> 00:41:10,882
Okay.
722
00:41:14,507 --> 00:41:17,337
- Tell me you caught them.
- I tagged the blond one.
723
00:41:18,994 --> 00:41:21,824
Oh, Loretta.
724
00:41:21,928 --> 00:41:23,999
What are you thinking?
725
00:41:24,102 --> 00:41:27,210
You might've killed one of them,
but his partner's still with her.
726
00:41:27,322 --> 00:41:30,972
And he is clearly skilled,
highly trained...
727
00:41:31,942 --> 00:41:33,629
and very dangerous.
728
00:41:43,432 --> 00:41:47,505
So, Miss Sage said
she was gonna leave the event,
729
00:41:47,609 --> 00:41:52,268
then got in a car
and left the event?
730
00:41:52,372 --> 00:41:55,064
- Did you try calling her?
- She doesn't have her phone.
731
00:41:55,168 --> 00:41:56,583
- Stolen phone.
- Didn't say that.
732
00:41:56,687 --> 00:41:58,447
Where's my magnifier?
733
00:41:58,666 --> 00:42:00,479
Listen, can you please
help with Nana?
734
00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,007
I don't want her hearing about Loretta
'cause it's going to upset her.
735
00:42:03,008 --> 00:42:06,215
- What about Loretta?
- Oh, nothing, Nana. She just went on a trip.
736
00:42:06,310 --> 00:42:07,594
- Oh.
- Yeah.
737
00:42:07,698 --> 00:42:10,148
That girl needed
to get out of the house.
738
00:42:10,252 --> 00:42:14,429
So, this is the thing.
Loretta's phone is not stolen. I took it.
739
00:42:14,530 --> 00:42:18,985
And I gave it to Alan.
Alan then gave it to the trainer, uh, Jack Trainer.
740
00:42:19,088 --> 00:42:21,366
And that is how we found her wearable.
741
00:42:21,470 --> 00:42:23,161
- And, uh, who's Alan?
- Dash.
742
00:42:23,265 --> 00:42:26,095
- What's that?
- He's the hero in all of her books.
743
00:42:26,199 --> 00:42:29,236
- Nana. Hey, slut.
- Mmm-mmm.
744
00:42:29,340 --> 00:42:32,675
Let's go in the other room and talk
about whichever war you lived through.
745
00:42:32,676 --> 00:42:35,519
Okay. Come on, it'll be fun.
I'm sorry. It'll be fun.
746
00:42:35,622 --> 00:42:37,555
Listen, Loretta Sage is missing.
747
00:42:37,659 --> 00:42:39,947
When I looked at her smartwatch,
it said that she had flown...
748
00:42:39,971 --> 00:42:41,651
...to some island
I've never even heard about.
749
00:42:41,652 --> 00:42:43,537
So, that means y'all need
to do something about this.
750
00:42:43,561 --> 00:42:45,944
And if you can't, I will,
and that won't look good for you.
751
00:42:46,099 --> 00:42:50,900
Pretty sure that's outside our jurisdiction.
You'd have to call the Feds.
752
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,604
- M'kay.
- And if you do go to the Feds,...
753
00:42:53,605 --> 00:42:55,500
- put in a good word for me.
- For me.
754
00:42:55,880 --> 00:42:56,885
For us.
755
00:43:02,511 --> 00:43:04,030
Oh, oh.
756
00:43:11,071 --> 00:43:13,315
What are you gonna do,
put the car back together?
757
00:43:13,418 --> 00:43:15,628
Well... we could...
758
00:43:31,540 --> 00:43:34,281
- Where did you say the phone was?
- Passenger glove.
759
00:43:34,282 --> 00:43:36,096
- What?
- Passenger glove compartment.
760
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:37,442
Goodness.
761
00:43:38,547 --> 00:43:40,066
Oh, my God.
762
00:43:40,169 --> 00:43:42,415
Oh, my God. No phone, no car.
We're so gonna die out here...
763
00:43:42,510 --> 00:43:44,242
- Here.
- Wh-What is this?
764
00:43:44,366 --> 00:43:46,000
Boots for the jungle.
765
00:43:46,870 --> 00:43:48,695
Oh, it's not exactly
hiking boots, but...
766
00:43:48,798 --> 00:43:51,544
I just figured your feet would be killing
you after wearing heels for this long.
767
00:43:51,560 --> 00:43:52,779
And I don't know....
It was the best we could do.
768
00:43:52,780 --> 00:43:56,772
- They're Allison's. Sorry.
- Oh. Okay, well, thank you.
769
00:43:56,876 --> 00:43:58,672
Here, oh, I got you cheese.
770
00:43:58,780 --> 00:44:00,599
- Oh, my God.
- You got to stay hydrated.
771
00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:02,639
- Thank you so much.
- They didn't have glass bottles,...
772
00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:04,746
so we'll definitely
hold onto it and recycle.
773
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:12,139
Okay, so what we need to do is find a phone,
we need to call the authorities,...
774
00:44:12,140 --> 00:44:15,000
and we need to wait here until
somebody comes and rescues us.
775
00:44:15,035 --> 00:44:18,656
Uh... This...
This is the rescue.
776
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:20,037
No one else is coming.
777
00:44:20,140 --> 00:44:22,108
- I'm sorry?
- I'm the rescue.
778
00:44:22,211 --> 00:44:25,009
It was originally just gonna be me,
and then I was like, Trainer should come.
779
00:44:25,010 --> 00:44:26,975
And then...
Oh, Trainer. Rest in peace.
780
00:44:27,078 --> 00:44:31,324
So, our best bet is to get to the airport.
See this road right here?
781
00:44:31,427 --> 00:44:34,120
From this area, just take a shortcut
through the jungle to the road.
782
00:44:34,223 --> 00:44:36,122
Did you just say
"shortcut through the jungle"?
783
00:44:36,225 --> 00:44:37,744
- Yeah.
- Okay, do you see us?
784
00:44:37,848 --> 00:44:40,047
- Uh-huh.
- Okay, you're not Dash, and I'm not Lovemore.
785
00:44:40,048 --> 00:44:41,886
Okay?
I'm Loretta, and you are Alan.
786
00:44:41,990 --> 00:44:44,308
- And jungles eat people like us, okay?
- Eat people.
787
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:47,720
And I don't want to mess up the jumpsuit.
It's on loan. So we're gonna stay put.
788
00:44:47,823 --> 00:44:49,756
We're not just gonna
stand around here, okay?
789
00:44:49,860 --> 00:44:51,240
We're gonna go
through the jungle,...
790
00:44:51,344 --> 00:44:53,449
we're gonna go to the airport
and find a phone,...
791
00:44:53,553 --> 00:44:56,556
- so you can have your cake and get what you want.
- "And eat it too"?
792
00:44:56,660 --> 00:44:59,110
If that's what you want to do
with your cake, fine. Let's go.
793
00:44:59,214 --> 00:45:01,226
- That's the only thing you do with cake.
- Not mine.
794
00:45:01,250 --> 00:45:03,701
I don't know what your people do,
but my people eat it.
795
00:45:03,805 --> 00:45:06,014
You could give it
to someone as a gift.
796
00:45:06,117 --> 00:45:09,984
Those people are still going
to eat the cake. Everybody eats cake.
797
00:45:10,087 --> 00:45:11,987
What about the kind
of people jump out of it?
798
00:45:11,988 --> 00:45:14,954
- They don't eat it, when they're in it.
- Oh, my God.
799
00:45:41,256 --> 00:45:42,949
What did they
kidnap you for anyhow?
800
00:45:42,950 --> 00:45:46,499
- Is it like some weird sex stuff like Taken?
- Oh, my God, thank you.
801
00:45:46,570 --> 00:45:49,298
I thought so too,
but the guy's one of the Fairfaxes.
802
00:45:49,380 --> 00:45:51,199
- Beverly?
- No, the older one.
803
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:55,459
The really odd one that had like
the vlog on finding Montezuma's treasure.
804
00:45:55,460 --> 00:45:57,519
Oh, the dude that was on the news
for trying to raise the Titanic?
805
00:45:57,520 --> 00:45:59,205
Yes, he's looking for
the Crown of Fire.
806
00:45:59,308 --> 00:46:03,278
Wait a minute. Like the actual
Crown of Fire? Like the one...
807
00:46:03,381 --> 00:46:06,730
- So those ruins were the Lost City...
- Yeah, they were the Lost City of D, yes.
808
00:46:06,810 --> 00:46:09,146
- What?! Are you kidding me right now?
- Shh!
809
00:46:09,249 --> 00:46:10,699
This is like... like your book.
810
00:46:10,803 --> 00:46:13,633
So we're basically on, like,
a Lovemore and Dash adventure right now?
811
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:15,739
- Ow!
- What is that?
812
00:46:15,842 --> 00:46:18,329
W-Wait... W-What if Fairfax
actually like finds the crown?
813
00:46:18,420 --> 00:46:19,820
Oh, h-he won't. He won't.
814
00:46:21,986 --> 00:46:23,091
- Where do we go?
- Uh...
815
00:46:23,194 --> 00:46:25,162
Oh, oh, oh.
816
00:46:28,234 --> 00:46:30,374
Okay, uh, we need
to get in the water.
817
00:46:30,477 --> 00:46:32,879
- W-What?
- We need... We need to go by river.
818
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:34,516
Oh, no, no,
I don't really do water.
819
00:46:34,622 --> 00:46:37,099
What do you mean, "do water"?
I'm not asking you to procreate with it.
820
00:46:37,100 --> 00:46:39,699
Uh, my body and water
don't really go together.
821
00:46:39,700 --> 00:46:41,972
How do you feel about dying?
Oh, God.
822
00:46:42,075 --> 00:46:43,955
Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're okay. You're okay.
823
00:46:44,020 --> 00:46:47,269
- I got you. I got you. Lorette. Lorette.
- Fine. I can swim. I can swim. Thank you very much.
824
00:46:47,300 --> 00:46:49,479
- Where are you going?
- I'm crossing.
825
00:46:49,480 --> 00:46:50,999
No, we have to stay
in the water.
826
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,753
I researched aquatic counter-tracking
for my book, A Year in the Bush.
827
00:46:53,777 --> 00:46:55,779
And they'll lose our tracks
in the water.
828
00:46:55,882 --> 00:46:58,678
Why is it warm here?
Wait, are you peeing?
829
00:46:58,782 --> 00:47:00,784
Just go around it.
830
00:47:29,571 --> 00:47:31,090
Okay, I think...
831
00:47:31,193 --> 00:47:33,195
- I think we lost them, right?
- Yeah.
832
00:47:33,196 --> 00:47:36,198
That wasn't so bad. Yeah.
833
00:47:36,302 --> 00:47:37,959
Okay, uh...
834
00:47:38,062 --> 00:47:40,478
- Don't panic.
- What do you mean, don't panic?
835
00:47:40,582 --> 00:47:41,790
- Just don't panic.
- No.
836
00:47:41,894 --> 00:47:43,719
- Stop saying "panic". I'm panicking now.
- Okay. Okay.
837
00:47:43,720 --> 00:47:45,620
You have something on your back.
838
00:47:47,100 --> 00:47:48,837
- Argh! No!
- Stop screaming.
839
00:47:48,838 --> 00:47:49,609
- What is that?
- Stop screaming. Stop screaming.
840
00:47:49,610 --> 00:47:50,971
- What is that?
- Stop screaming.
841
00:47:50,972 --> 00:47:52,421
- Do you have any on you?
- No. No.
842
00:47:52,525 --> 00:47:53,999
- Wait, why don't you have any on you?
- I don't know.
843
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,098
Maybe the jumpsuit scared them off.
I don't... I don't know.
844
00:47:56,099 --> 00:47:57,495
- Get 'em off.
- Oh, my God.
845
00:47:57,599 --> 00:48:00,119
Okay. No, I can't touch
those blood-gorged mucous sacks.
846
00:48:00,222 --> 00:48:01,672
- Can you fling it?
- Right now!
847
00:48:01,776 --> 00:48:03,156
- What if you just pick it and fling it?
- Get it!
848
00:48:03,260 --> 00:48:05,238
- Just pick it and fling it.
- You pick it and fling it!
849
00:48:05,262 --> 00:48:07,333
- Can you spin it off?
- Please, get it off.
850
00:48:07,436 --> 00:48:09,473
I don't like touching it.
I'm feeling faint.
851
00:48:09,576 --> 00:48:12,683
- They're sucking my soul out.
- Okay, okay. Stop, stop, stop.
852
00:48:14,340 --> 00:48:16,583
Don't make that sound.
853
00:48:20,173 --> 00:48:21,657
How many of them are there?
854
00:48:21,761 --> 00:48:23,280
Oh, there's not many.
855
00:48:23,383 --> 00:48:25,385
- It feels like there's so many.
- What are you... What are you...
856
00:48:25,489 --> 00:48:26,801
- I feel so many.
- Oh!
857
00:48:26,904 --> 00:48:29,458
- Holy mother of God!
- Why are you praying?
858
00:48:29,562 --> 00:48:32,599
Is it that bad? It can't be that bad.
Is it that bad? How many?
859
00:48:32,703 --> 00:48:33,946
It's not great.
860
00:48:34,049 --> 00:48:35,706
They're gonna suck
every bit of me out.
861
00:48:35,810 --> 00:48:38,467
Just please stop speaking.
I just need to... need to get low.
862
00:48:38,571 --> 00:48:40,297
Hold on a second.
863
00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:43,196
Oh, God! I can feel them just...
they're just sucking out so much.
864
00:48:43,300 --> 00:48:46,165
I'm gonna be like a shriveled-up
skin sack when they're done.
865
00:48:46,268 --> 00:48:48,236
You cannot tell my dad
I died this way, okay?
866
00:48:48,339 --> 00:48:52,378
You gotta tell him I was wrestling
an anaconda with a sword or something.
867
00:48:52,481 --> 00:48:55,277
I'm like a blood Jamba Juice.
They're just sucking it all out.
868
00:48:55,381 --> 00:48:57,003
Why are they all
on my butt though?
869
00:48:57,107 --> 00:48:59,730
Kind of like picking anchovies
off my Caesar salad.
870
00:48:59,834 --> 00:49:01,559
- It's actually not so bad.
- Anchovies?
871
00:49:01,663 --> 00:49:03,251
Why do you go to food right now?
872
00:49:03,354 --> 00:49:06,219
Just find the queen,
and let's be done with this.
873
00:49:06,323 --> 00:49:08,670
I think you're good.
I need to just check your front.
874
00:49:08,773 --> 00:49:11,017
Okay. I can't look.
875
00:49:13,261 --> 00:49:14,572
Is it bad?
876
00:49:14,676 --> 00:49:17,782
- Uh, wow.
- What is it? Just say it.
877
00:49:17,886 --> 00:49:21,234
I mean, you-you expect it to,
you know, not...
878
00:49:21,338 --> 00:49:24,065
And then suddenly there it is,
and it is, uh...
879
00:49:24,168 --> 00:49:26,411
- You just... You know, you get excited for a person.
- Wait? What?
880
00:49:26,412 --> 00:49:29,139
- I mean, I'm excited for all people-all people, but...
- W-Why are you excited?
881
00:49:29,242 --> 00:49:31,679
Well, you know, like people wonder,
I mean they wonder, I mean...
882
00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:33,481
but they don't know,
they don't know, right?
883
00:49:33,482 --> 00:49:35,879
T-They don't... T-They don't...
until suddenly they do know,...
884
00:49:35,980 --> 00:49:40,288
and then they... they know
something that wasn't known before.
885
00:49:40,391 --> 00:49:42,155
Just... Do I have any leeches or not?
886
00:49:42,156 --> 00:49:46,466
Oh, y-your plucky warrior
hangs in tranquil solitude.
887
00:49:46,570 --> 00:49:47,674
W-W-What?
888
00:49:47,675 --> 00:49:49,918
No, you're good.
You're good.
889
00:49:51,057 --> 00:49:52,785
We were so brave just then.
890
00:49:52,786 --> 00:49:55,129
Why do they go for the butt so much?
891
00:50:16,130 --> 00:50:19,292
What's that song you're singing?
892
00:50:19,396 --> 00:50:22,399
A song my abbiused to sing
to me when I was a kid.
893
00:50:23,365 --> 00:50:26,023
- "If you suck life from the island,...
- Yeah?
894
00:50:26,127 --> 00:50:28,923
the island will suck of you."
895
00:50:29,026 --> 00:50:32,961
Your grandma sang you songs about
getting sucked off by an island?
896
00:50:33,065 --> 00:50:35,412
It doesn't translate super well.
897
00:50:36,309 --> 00:50:41,245
Is phantom leech syndrome, like, a thing?
They don't lay eggs, do they?
898
00:51:30,060 --> 00:51:31,571
Queen Taha?
899
00:51:45,171 --> 00:51:54,146
"King Kalaman and his treasure laid to rest...
laid to rest in the well of endless tears."
900
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,281
"...laid to rest in the well of endless tears."
901
00:51:56,282 --> 00:51:58,150
- What does that mean?
- Loretta!
902
00:51:58,840 --> 00:52:00,566
You gave me a heart attack.
903
00:52:01,256 --> 00:52:02,913
Where'd you go?
904
00:52:06,986 --> 00:52:08,539
What is this?
905
00:52:08,643 --> 00:52:11,887
I-I'm not sure,
but maybe they gathered here?
906
00:52:14,442 --> 00:52:19,862
Can you imagine being right here,
right in this very spot back then?
907
00:52:19,964 --> 00:52:21,690
The stories that they told?
908
00:52:21,794 --> 00:52:24,555
So much history I'm sure
happened right here.
909
00:52:29,871 --> 00:52:31,252
They've got us cornered.
910
00:52:31,355 --> 00:52:33,249
- Okay. We've got to go up. Come on.
- What?
911
00:52:33,550 --> 00:52:36,559
Have you seen what I'm wearing?
I'm in a glitter straitjacket.
912
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:39,329
There's nowhere to go but up.
Come on. Let's go.
913
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:42,999
Ooh! I should not be doing this.
I'm too old for this.
914
00:52:43,090 --> 00:52:44,299
No, you're not.
You're beautiful.
915
00:52:44,300 --> 00:52:47,958
I didn't say I'm not beautiful.
I said I'm too old to be doing this.
916
00:52:48,262 --> 00:52:51,686
My skill is sitting and thinking
and eating when I can't think.
917
00:52:51,990 --> 00:52:54,439
Yeah, you definitely could be
wearing better shoes for this.
918
00:52:54,440 --> 00:52:56,210
You brought me these shoes.
919
00:52:56,422 --> 00:52:58,865
I can't go any further.
I can't go any further.
920
00:52:58,999 --> 00:53:00,700
I'm not doing so great here.
921
00:53:00,744 --> 00:53:04,084
You got it. Come on. I know you think
that you're safer holding on,...
922
00:53:04,085 --> 00:53:05,563
but you have to keep going.
923
00:53:05,564 --> 00:53:07,564
- I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't.
- Okay?
924
00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:09,809
- Do you smell that?
- Uh, smell what?
925
00:53:09,988 --> 00:53:11,779
- I smell something.
- Is it a predator? What is it?
926
00:53:11,780 --> 00:53:13,775
- A downward cascading fire?
- No, you got to smell a little deeper.
927
00:53:13,776 --> 00:53:14,985
I don't smell anything!
928
00:53:18,402 --> 00:53:21,647
Take a big, deep breath.
929
00:53:21,750 --> 00:53:23,062
All right.
930
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:24,788
- Good job.
- Okay.
931
00:53:25,200 --> 00:53:28,516
- That was manipulative. Thank you.
- Yeah, it was.
932
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:31,105
Here we go. I'm gonna help you
out a little bit, all right?
933
00:53:31,208 --> 00:53:33,359
- One, two, three... Here we go!
- W-What are you doing?
934
00:53:33,360 --> 00:53:34,889
- Get up. Come on. Come on.
- G-Get out of there.
935
00:53:34,900 --> 00:53:36,940
- No, no, no, don't flex.
- That's my... That's my hoo-hoo.
936
00:53:36,999 --> 00:53:39,239
Just ride the head.
Just keep the hands moving and ride the head.
937
00:53:39,240 --> 00:53:41,392
- Okay. Oh, God.
- You're doing great.
938
00:53:41,494 --> 00:53:44,152
Sorry about the scratchy haircut.
Come on.
939
00:54:04,241 --> 00:54:06,485
Dulcius ex asperis.
940
00:54:07,071 --> 00:54:08,452
What was that?
941
00:54:08,556 --> 00:54:10,074
Oh, nothing.
942
00:54:10,178 --> 00:54:12,664
It was just something that,
uh, John and I would say...
943
00:54:12,665 --> 00:54:17,737
after we finished something big, like a...
like an archaeological dig or a manuscript.
944
00:54:17,841 --> 00:54:21,155
It's Latin. It means,
"sweeter after difficulty".
945
00:54:22,294 --> 00:54:25,712
What's, uh...
What's Latin for "Loretta's a badass"?
946
00:54:25,814 --> 00:54:30,302
I am a badass.
I climbed a mountain.
947
00:54:30,405 --> 00:54:33,374
Oh, my God. I wish Beth
could've seen us do this.
948
00:54:33,470 --> 00:54:36,308
- Oh, God. Beth.
- Don't worry about Beth.
949
00:54:36,411 --> 00:54:39,899
She's probably got the whole
navy after us right now.
950
00:54:40,190 --> 00:54:43,679
I get that you think you have to go
to the island authorities yourself,...
951
00:54:43,680 --> 00:54:46,894
but don't worry, I'm keeping
Loretta's socials super active.
952
00:54:46,895 --> 00:54:49,181
Just tweeted,
"Did I just get kidnapped?
953
00:54:49,182 --> 00:54:52,800
#FML @ShawnMendes
#ShawnMendes"
954
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:54,574
And you're traveling alone?
955
00:54:54,575 --> 00:54:57,359
Yes, I'm traveling alone.
Mmm-hmm. I'm single.
956
00:54:57,360 --> 00:54:59,199
- Beth, are you sure about this?
- Then this might work.
957
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:01,125
- Okay! Talk to me.
- You'll hit New York.
958
00:55:01,240 --> 00:55:04,750
From there, you'll fly to Guinea,
where you can pick up a puddle jumper.
959
00:55:04,852 --> 00:55:05,923
A what?
960
00:55:06,859 --> 00:55:08,499
- Small plane.
- Yeah, no leg room.
961
00:55:08,500 --> 00:55:09,709
That's fine. It's fine. I'll take it.
962
00:55:09,710 --> 00:55:11,650
- Or you could just come home.
- Thank you.
963
00:55:19,627 --> 00:55:22,112
We need something more flammable.
Everything is just so wet.
964
00:55:22,216 --> 00:55:23,734
What's in here?
What's in your bag?
965
00:55:23,838 --> 00:55:25,704
- Uh...
- Oh, a lot. Okay.
966
00:55:25,705 --> 00:55:27,255
W-W-What are you doing?
967
00:55:27,359 --> 00:55:29,223
Okay. Face masks.
968
00:55:29,326 --> 00:55:30,821
Yeah, that was like
a gift-basket thing.
969
00:55:30,845 --> 00:55:34,195
- You brought a scented candle into the jungle?
- My mom gave me that.
970
00:55:34,297 --> 00:55:35,929
It was like a weird gift
for Mother's Day.
971
00:55:35,953 --> 00:55:38,232
Your mom gives you gifts
for Mother's Day?
972
00:55:39,543 --> 00:55:40,280
Noir...
973
00:55:40,308 --> 00:55:44,071
Eucalyptus rosemary oil.
Ooh. Oh, that smells good.
974
00:55:44,072 --> 00:55:48,276
- Um... Oh. Oh, okay. All right.
- Whoo! Yes!
975
00:55:48,580 --> 00:55:50,830
Yes, I made fire!
976
00:55:50,999 --> 00:55:54,779
- That's pretty impressive. You have to...
- It is a beautiful fire.
977
00:55:54,780 --> 00:55:56,367
Who would have thought? Oh!
978
00:55:56,368 --> 00:55:59,114
Oh, you're just, um,
taking your-your shirt off?
979
00:56:00,419 --> 00:56:04,359
That looks really uncomfortable.
Are you okay? The back?
980
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:08,424
Yeah. That is why
I don't do water.
981
00:56:08,425 --> 00:56:11,169
- Okay.
- My body become an eighth-grader's face.
982
00:56:11,170 --> 00:56:13,284
Do you have anything for it?
Like some ointment or something?
983
00:56:13,285 --> 00:56:15,786
I did. Yeah, I do.
Well, I did.
984
00:56:15,850 --> 00:56:17,957
It was in a little,
tiny little bottle.
985
00:56:17,958 --> 00:56:22,172
It was this. I'm sorry.
Oh, God, I'm sorry.
986
00:56:22,276 --> 00:56:23,622
It's okay.
987
00:56:23,725 --> 00:56:26,038
- Hold on. Yes. Come here. Come here.
- What?
988
00:56:26,141 --> 00:56:28,558
- Come here. Sit down.
- Let me see.
989
00:56:28,661 --> 00:56:30,145
- Just sit down.
- Right here?
990
00:56:30,249 --> 00:56:31,457
Yeah.
991
00:56:32,665 --> 00:56:34,288
Okay.
992
00:56:34,391 --> 00:56:36,335
Oh, no, you don't have to touch it.
It's okay. It's fine.
993
00:56:36,359 --> 00:56:38,360
I touched
your engorged sacks, so...
994
00:56:40,550 --> 00:56:42,296
- The leeches.
- Oh, okay.
995
00:56:42,399 --> 00:56:45,195
Okay, this might be
a little bit cold.
996
00:56:46,369 --> 00:56:48,094
- Sorry.
- Oh, yeah. Mmm-hmm.
997
00:56:48,198 --> 00:56:49,475
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
998
00:56:49,579 --> 00:56:54,688
Maybe this is how Dash should die.
Horrible eczema outbreak. That's so sexy.
999
00:56:54,780 --> 00:56:56,310
Well, I could make it work.
1000
00:56:56,758 --> 00:56:57,794
Yeah?
1001
00:56:58,450 --> 00:56:59,899
All right, then.
1002
00:57:01,176 --> 00:57:02,902
How would you write this?
1003
00:57:03,006 --> 00:57:04,490
Okay.
1004
00:57:06,389 --> 00:57:12,256
- "Warmed by the fragrant fire..."
- Mmm-hmm.
1005
00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:14,258
- Starting strong.
- Mmm-hmm.
1006
00:57:14,362 --> 00:57:17,469
"Lovemore's hands explored the...
1007
00:57:19,229 --> 00:57:23,406
the contoured scenery
of Dash's body.
1008
00:57:25,546 --> 00:57:30,689
Familiar terrain made
new and exciting with every...
1009
00:57:31,621 --> 00:57:33,968
with every scarlet rim."
1010
00:57:35,072 --> 00:57:39,112
And that didn't, uh...
didn't turn her off?
1011
00:57:39,214 --> 00:57:40,423
No.
1012
00:57:41,251 --> 00:57:43,080
"Because with every cardinal ridge,...
1013
00:57:44,086 --> 00:57:48,710
Lovemore discovered another letter
in the language that only their bodies spoke."
1014
00:57:49,742 --> 00:57:51,779
And what were
their bodies saying?
1015
00:57:53,746 --> 00:57:55,299
"Take me,...
1016
00:57:57,198 --> 00:57:58,820
...take me,...
1017
00:57:59,407 --> 00:58:01,098
...take me."
1018
00:58:01,202 --> 00:58:02,514
How's that?
1019
00:58:03,342 --> 00:58:04,619
It was good.
1020
00:58:04,723 --> 00:58:06,450
- Your back. I mean, how is your back?
- Good. Good.
1021
00:58:06,552 --> 00:58:07,967
- Okay. You sure?
- Yeah.
1022
00:58:08,071 --> 00:58:12,627
- I also meant my back. Right there, yeah.
- Okay.
1023
00:58:20,877 --> 00:58:21,912
Supplies.
1024
00:58:24,052 --> 00:58:28,332
Okay, I'm chilly. I think I'm gonna
probably turn in in a little bit.
1025
00:58:28,436 --> 00:58:29,644
- Okay.
- You good?
1026
00:58:29,748 --> 00:58:32,406
Yeah, I'm fire...
fine. I'm fine.
1027
00:58:32,509 --> 00:58:35,443
I'm not "fire".
I'm fine by the fire.
1028
00:58:36,133 --> 00:58:37,859
Okay. All right.
1029
00:58:45,864 --> 00:58:49,498
Uh, it's up to you,
but if you're cold,...
1030
00:58:49,499 --> 00:58:53,392
maybe we could probably both
fit in here, if you wanted to.
1031
00:58:54,048 --> 00:58:55,774
Both of us?
1032
00:58:55,877 --> 00:58:58,915
- Well, only if you want to. I mean, it's just...
- Yeah, no, no, that sounds...
1033
00:58:59,018 --> 00:59:00,503
Uh...
1034
00:59:00,606 --> 00:59:01,987
Okay. How do you...
1035
00:59:02,090 --> 00:59:04,161
- Well, you can go first, then I'll figure it out.
- No, no, why don't you go.
1036
00:59:04,162 --> 00:59:07,302
I-It's definitely a
"ladies first" type of situation.
1037
00:59:07,400 --> 00:59:10,064
- Keep hands out of the bag at all times.
- That's what I was gonna do.
1038
00:59:10,065 --> 00:59:11,824
- Butt to butt.
- Hands out and butt to butt.
1039
00:59:11,928 --> 00:59:15,241
- Yeah. What do I do?
- Just get in. Go ahead and sit.
1040
00:59:15,345 --> 00:59:18,037
I sit first?
Okay. I'm in.
1041
00:59:19,591 --> 00:59:22,179
You're too heavy. You're gonna
flip this thing like a cruise ship.
1042
00:59:22,283 --> 00:59:24,941
You watch yourself.
Hold on. I'm not in.
1043
00:59:25,044 --> 00:59:28,220
Why is this engaging
my core so much?
1044
00:59:29,014 --> 00:59:30,912
How 'bout you shimmy?
1045
00:59:31,016 --> 00:59:33,121
- I can't breathe. I'm not breathing.
- Are you good?
1046
00:59:33,225 --> 00:59:34,537
My face.
1047
00:59:35,123 --> 00:59:36,366
Yeah. Okay.
1048
00:59:39,473 --> 00:59:40,957
Hands are out. Butt to butt.
1049
00:59:41,060 --> 00:59:42,096
Okay.
1050
01:00:13,299 --> 01:00:14,887
Well!
1051
01:00:14,991 --> 01:00:16,130
Come on.
1052
01:00:16,233 --> 01:00:17,890
Come on! Let's hear it!
1053
01:00:17,994 --> 01:00:21,480
Let's give a nice round
of applause to Loretta!
1054
01:00:21,584 --> 01:00:23,206
She earned it.
1055
01:00:23,309 --> 01:00:27,175
A geriatric shut-in left you
holding your dicks in the jungle.
1056
01:00:27,279 --> 01:00:28,660
Good job, Loretta.
1057
01:00:28,763 --> 01:00:31,283
Boss, come on.
People are dying now.
1058
01:00:31,386 --> 01:00:35,045
Don't you think that maybe
this has all gone too far?
1059
01:00:36,288 --> 01:00:38,014
Is it really worth it?
1060
01:00:38,117 --> 01:00:41,720
I am on the cusp
of attaining the unattainable.
1061
01:00:41,922 --> 01:00:44,607
Something singular,
something no nation,...
1062
01:00:44,710 --> 01:00:48,300
no emperor, no brownnosing
brothers ever have.
1063
01:00:48,403 --> 01:00:51,510
The legendary Crown of Fire.
1064
01:00:51,825 --> 01:00:53,098
So, yes.
1065
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:55,514
Yes, I would definitely say
it's worth it.
1066
01:01:05,248 --> 01:01:06,767
Excuse me!
1067
01:01:06,870 --> 01:01:09,770
Excuse me, sir. I need to get
to my next connecting flight.
1068
01:01:09,873 --> 01:01:11,219
No flight.
1069
01:01:11,323 --> 01:01:13,912
The pilot is sick.
Come tomorrow.
1070
01:01:14,015 --> 01:01:16,235
No, no, sir. I cannot come tomorrow.
I need to do this today.
1071
01:01:16,259 --> 01:01:20,988
I need to get to the island
Isla Hundida tonight. Lives are at stake.
1072
01:01:21,091 --> 01:01:22,576
Come tomorrow.
1073
01:01:26,407 --> 01:01:28,098
- Excuse me, miss?
- Yes?
1074
01:01:28,202 --> 01:01:32,275
I couldn't help but overhear
you say that you like steak.
1075
01:01:32,378 --> 01:01:37,556
Okay, this is a little bit crazy,
but I also like steak.
1076
01:01:37,660 --> 01:01:40,007
- What?
- I also like steak.
1077
01:01:40,110 --> 01:01:43,562
Would you like to, maybe,
I don't know...
1078
01:01:43,666 --> 01:01:46,496
- Maybe there's a...
- No. "Lives are at stake."
1079
01:01:46,600 --> 01:01:48,360
I need to go
to the island tonight.
1080
01:01:48,463 --> 01:01:49,879
- Ah.
- Yes.
1081
01:01:49,982 --> 01:01:51,570
- Even more serious.
- Extremely.
1082
01:01:51,674 --> 01:01:54,677
Well, I believe that I may
be able to assist you.
1083
01:01:54,780 --> 01:01:56,713
I have a cargo plane.
1084
01:01:57,887 --> 01:02:01,680
Maybe after I make my delivery,
we could swing by your island.
1085
01:02:01,884 --> 01:02:04,479
I'm about to ask you something,
and you better tell me the truth.
1086
01:02:04,583 --> 01:02:06,447
Have you ever
murdered anyone before?
1087
01:02:06,850 --> 01:02:07,820
No!
1088
01:02:08,420 --> 01:02:09,795
No!
1089
01:02:13,385 --> 01:02:16,112
I don't know if I really buy it,
but let me tell you something.
1090
01:02:16,215 --> 01:02:20,461
If you ever think about murdering me,
I promise, I will murder you first.
1091
01:02:20,564 --> 01:02:21,911
My pleasure.
1092
01:02:22,014 --> 01:02:24,154
You are weird. Let's go.
1093
01:03:19,554 --> 01:03:22,972
"King Kalaman and his treasure
laid to rest in the well...
1094
01:03:23,627 --> 01:03:25,043
of endless tears."
1095
01:03:26,734 --> 01:03:27,908
What is that?
1096
01:03:29,081 --> 01:03:32,533
Oh, it's a... it's a thing.
I mean, it's not, uh...
1097
01:03:32,636 --> 01:03:34,880
You know, it's not
what you think it is.
1098
01:03:34,984 --> 01:03:38,781
So it's not Fairfax's fragment
of an ancient parchment?
1099
01:03:38,884 --> 01:03:42,681
Okay.
It's what you think it is.
1100
01:03:42,785 --> 01:03:44,314
Loretta, I thought
you were smarter than that.
1101
01:03:44,338 --> 01:03:47,134
Fairfax is never
gonna stop hunting us now.
1102
01:03:47,237 --> 01:03:48,339
- What were you thinking?
- You know,...
1103
01:03:48,340 --> 01:03:50,439
we have a volcano
that could bury the tomb...
1104
01:03:50,440 --> 01:03:53,968
before we get to it, before we see it,
before we preserve its memory.
1105
01:03:54,072 --> 01:03:56,005
- It's... This is...
- I'm sorry. Is that what we're doing?
1106
01:03:56,108 --> 01:03:58,628
'Cause no one told me.
W-When were you gonna tell me?
1107
01:03:58,732 --> 01:04:00,147
Why would I tell you?
1108
01:04:00,250 --> 01:04:02,159
We're in this together.
I came here to rescue you.
1109
01:04:02,290 --> 01:04:03,875
You know you're not Dash, right?
1110
01:04:03,978 --> 01:04:06,325
You don't ride in on a white
horse to rescue people.
1111
01:04:06,326 --> 01:04:10,719
You... spray yourself with bronzer
and you stand in front of wind machines,...
1112
01:04:10,720 --> 01:04:12,228
which is great for you.
1113
01:04:12,440 --> 01:04:15,299
How would you have any idea
what I'm actually like?
1114
01:04:15,300 --> 01:04:18,119
I know you.
You're a pretty open book, Alan.
1115
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:19,925
- Okay, then who am I?
- Really?
1116
01:04:20,029 --> 01:04:21,064
Yeah.
1117
01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:25,344
O... Okay, uh, uh...
1118
01:04:25,448 --> 01:04:29,159
You were a homecoming king and you
coasted on your good looks to LA,...
1119
01:04:29,160 --> 01:04:31,459
but then realized that being the most
handsome kid in the middle of nowhere...
1120
01:04:31,460 --> 01:04:33,007
doesn't mean you're going to be a star.
1121
01:04:33,111 --> 01:04:35,064
Until one day, when a woman
who couldn't publish her book...
1122
01:04:35,065 --> 01:04:38,737
on Spanish colonization in the Atlantic
decided to write a romance novel,...
1123
01:04:38,738 --> 01:04:40,670
uh, chose you at random
to be on the cover.
1124
01:04:40,784 --> 01:04:44,490
Lucky for you and her,
the novels were a smashing success.
1125
01:04:44,494 --> 01:04:47,599
She kept writing her schlock,
you kept posing,...
1126
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:52,855
um, you know, neither one of us
becoming who we'd hoped we would be.
1127
01:04:52,958 --> 01:04:57,279
Uh, and then one day,
we both die in the jungle...
1128
01:04:57,280 --> 01:05:01,080
on one of those Atlantic islands
I wrote about all those years ago.
1129
01:05:01,190 --> 01:05:02,209
Right?
1130
01:05:03,555 --> 01:05:04,867
Mmm-hmm.
1131
01:05:16,154 --> 01:05:17,880
It was Sarasota, by the way.
1132
01:05:18,397 --> 01:05:19,985
It's not nowhere.
1133
01:05:20,089 --> 01:05:22,332
I grew up there with
my mom and two sisters.
1134
01:05:22,436 --> 01:05:23,471
And yeah,...
1135
01:05:24,472 --> 01:05:27,165
I started modeling
'cause I wanted to get away.
1136
01:05:27,268 --> 01:05:29,201
It was the only job
that I could think of...
1137
01:05:29,305 --> 01:05:32,549
that could take me to all of the
places that I always dreamed of going.
1138
01:05:32,653 --> 01:05:33,965
Then finally to Los Angeles,...
1139
01:05:34,068 --> 01:05:36,830
where I posed on the cover
of your romance novel.
1140
01:05:36,933 --> 01:05:39,833
And I was so embarrassed that one
of my friends might've seen me...
1141
01:05:39,936 --> 01:05:44,838
in that wig on the cover of your book
that I avoided talking to them for months.
1142
01:05:45,804 --> 01:05:47,288
And then one day,...
1143
01:05:48,013 --> 01:05:52,776
I'm walking home,
and I hear this lady yell, "Dash!"
1144
01:05:52,880 --> 01:05:55,400
She runs up,
and she is so happy.
1145
01:05:55,503 --> 01:05:59,266
Then I thought,
"How could I be this embarrassed...
1146
01:05:59,369 --> 01:06:02,062
about something
that makes people this happy?"
1147
01:06:05,410 --> 01:06:07,101
Loretta, you can do
whatever you want.
1148
01:06:07,205 --> 01:06:09,310
If you don't want to write
anymore, don't write.
1149
01:06:09,414 --> 01:06:13,901
But don't minimize the people that
love your work by calling it schlock.
1150
01:06:14,005 --> 01:06:16,559
That's not fair to them.
1151
01:06:17,767 --> 01:06:20,666
You know what's ironic?
I thought you of all people would know...
1152
01:06:20,770 --> 01:06:23,221
not to judge a book by its cover.
1153
01:06:27,294 --> 01:06:29,883
Judge a book by its cover model.
1154
01:07:01,362 --> 01:07:02,536
Alan?
1155
01:07:02,639 --> 01:07:03,917
Alan.
1156
01:07:15,894 --> 01:07:17,240
There's two of them.
1157
01:07:23,350 --> 01:07:26,042
- Loretta! Loretta! I'm over here!
- Alan!
1158
01:07:27,112 --> 01:07:27,998
- Alan!
- Come on! Come on!
1159
01:07:27,999 --> 01:07:30,060
Motorcycles and guns,
motorcycles and guns!
1160
01:07:30,588 --> 01:07:32,002
Argh! Come on, this way!
1161
01:07:32,060 --> 01:07:34,104
Argh! Stop shooting!
1162
01:07:39,400 --> 01:07:41,349
- Just give 'em the parchment!
- I can't.
1163
01:07:41,350 --> 01:07:44,128
Yes, you can, actually.
You just say, "Here", and you throw it at 'em.
1164
01:07:44,400 --> 01:07:46,545
Right. And then I'm sure
they'll happily let us go.
1165
01:07:46,660 --> 01:07:48,689
- Okay, keep down, keep down.
- How do they keep finding us?
1166
01:07:48,690 --> 01:07:51,319
- You're basically a walking disco ball.
- Okay, we need to come up with a plan.
1167
01:07:51,320 --> 01:07:52,219
- Look, I have an idea.
- Okay.
1168
01:07:52,220 --> 01:07:55,045
We're gonna dig a hole, we're gonna
throw our voices, "We're over here."
1169
01:07:55,046 --> 01:07:55,899
- Can you sound like a bird?
- No, no!
1170
01:07:55,900 --> 01:07:58,419
- No, I have a plan.
- Alan, please, Alan, please, I'm thinking.
1171
01:07:58,420 --> 01:08:02,216
- I know, but I have a plan.
- Please, just let me think about...
1172
01:08:02,550 --> 01:08:05,944
- Wait a minute. They're shooting at you.
- Yeah, that's why we're hiding.
1173
01:08:05,945 --> 01:08:08,360
No. No, no, no.
They're shooting only at you.
1174
01:08:08,464 --> 01:08:10,984
Mean they won't shoot me.
It's my brain that's valuable.
1175
01:08:11,087 --> 01:08:14,954
What? I don't think you actually
hear the things you say sometimes.
1176
01:08:14,955 --> 01:08:17,749
- Okay, maybe I can shield you.
- You are not shielding me.
1177
01:08:17,750 --> 01:08:19,767
- No, I should be shielding you.
- Why? Because I'm a woman...
1178
01:08:19,768 --> 01:08:22,609
- that's supremely sexist?
- Well, look, I don't think, you know, using women...
1179
01:08:22,610 --> 01:08:26,102
as human shields is exactly the change
that Gloria Seinfeld had in mind, do you?
1180
01:08:26,250 --> 01:08:29,639
- Gloria Steinem?
- Whatever. Her too. You know what? Fine.
1181
01:08:29,640 --> 01:08:32,212
- Please mansplain sexism to me right now.
- Oh, my God. I am a woman.
1182
01:08:32,315 --> 01:08:34,422
I can't mansplain anything.
1183
01:08:34,624 --> 01:08:39,180
Uh, I'm a feminist, and I think a
woman can do anything a man can do.
1184
01:08:39,350 --> 01:08:41,799
- We just need to stay here until they get tired.
- I have an idea. Can...
1185
01:08:41,800 --> 01:08:43,604
- Please can I tell you my plan?
- Alan!
1186
01:08:43,605 --> 01:08:47,020
This is not a situation you can get
out of by ripping your shirt off.
1187
01:08:47,200 --> 01:08:49,056
Not my shirt.
1188
01:09:20,501 --> 01:09:21,813
Three!
1189
01:09:21,916 --> 01:09:23,504
- Yes!
- Oh!
1190
01:09:27,800 --> 01:09:29,476
Oh.
1191
01:09:29,889 --> 01:09:34,850
That was different than I had in my head.
I was just... just wanted us to stop them.
1192
01:09:34,900 --> 01:09:37,199
Could it have been
the wind that made it do that?
1193
01:09:37,200 --> 01:09:39,210
No, I think it was us.
I think... we did it.
1194
01:09:39,313 --> 01:09:41,859
We did the one guy, right?
B-But that was, like, you know...
1195
01:09:41,860 --> 01:09:45,324
We just wanted him to stop, but I think
the other guy could've moved, I mean, really.
1196
01:09:45,325 --> 01:09:47,687
So, that was...
that one was on him.
1197
01:09:47,688 --> 01:09:50,699
Even if we weren't here,
that could've happened.
1198
01:09:50,700 --> 01:09:52,209
Why are you gonna stop
next to a cliff?
1199
01:09:52,210 --> 01:09:54,779
But, t-they were wearing helmets,
so maybe they're...
1200
01:09:54,780 --> 01:09:57,200
But the rest of their body
didn't have a helmet.
1201
01:09:57,420 --> 01:09:58,370
So there'd just be a head.
1202
01:09:58,680 --> 01:10:00,748
I think they were driving
recklessly, right?
1203
01:10:00,852 --> 01:10:05,028
Don't be mean on a bike.
Don't do mean stuff on a bike.
1204
01:10:08,825 --> 01:10:11,069
I mean, perhaps they're fine.
1205
01:10:11,173 --> 01:10:13,589
Yeah, probably not.
Uh, but that's okay.
1206
01:10:13,692 --> 01:10:17,972
That's all right.
You know, things happen. Let's go.
1207
01:10:20,182 --> 01:10:23,357
- You gonna put it back together?
- It's on loan.
1208
01:10:36,163 --> 01:10:38,476
- Look at me.
- Okay.
1209
01:10:39,373 --> 01:10:41,410
What more can I do, you know?
1210
01:10:41,515 --> 01:10:43,619
You've done so much already, Beth.
1211
01:10:43,620 --> 01:10:46,600
My poor, sweet,
little Nana has lost her sight.
1212
01:10:46,700 --> 01:10:51,289
The book release is a complete disaster,
which I've leveraged everything on,...
1213
01:10:51,290 --> 01:10:53,949
so I'm probably,
most definitely broke right now.
1214
01:10:53,990 --> 01:10:56,977
And most importantly,
I've lost a writer.
1215
01:10:57,200 --> 01:10:58,800
Who does that?
Who loses a writer?
1216
01:10:58,990 --> 01:11:03,259
Okay, Beth, you remind me
of my best friend, Randy.
1217
01:11:03,363 --> 01:11:08,299
Always looking out for other people,
never taking care of herself.
1218
01:11:09,300 --> 01:11:10,715
Isn't that right, Randy?
1219
01:11:13,235 --> 01:11:15,098
She's like my therapist,
this one over here.
1220
01:11:15,202 --> 01:11:17,308
LOL. "Laughing Out Loud."
1221
01:11:17,411 --> 01:11:21,799
After you take care of your friend,
how about we go to a beach?
1222
01:11:21,800 --> 01:11:24,399
- What?
- Look, I have a pickup in Hawaii.
1223
01:11:24,400 --> 01:11:26,300
She doesn't have to come.
1224
01:11:27,200 --> 01:11:29,299
Okay! Okay, you can come!
1225
01:11:29,600 --> 01:11:31,287
She's hilarious.
1226
01:11:32,100 --> 01:11:33,499
Let me ask you something.
1227
01:11:33,490 --> 01:11:36,419
We're all sitting here chitchatting,
but who's flying the plane?
1228
01:11:36,420 --> 01:11:38,109
- Autopilot.
- What?
1229
01:11:38,110 --> 01:11:40,986
Sir, go to the cockpit,
fly the plane.
1230
01:11:41,200 --> 01:11:42,436
Okay.
1231
01:11:43,196 --> 01:11:44,956
I'm going to go land the plane.
1232
01:11:45,110 --> 01:11:46,509
Okay.
1233
01:11:46,612 --> 01:11:48,979
No, no, no. Take the goat.
Please, take the goat.
1234
01:11:48,999 --> 01:11:51,275
She's on break.
Enjoy the flight!
1235
01:12:26,660 --> 01:12:28,033
- Hi.
- Hola.
1236
01:12:32,699 --> 01:12:35,178
This English dude came in
and basically kidnapped her.
1237
01:12:37,319 --> 01:12:40,632
Hey, it's Beth. Please leave a message,
and I'll get right back to you.
1238
01:12:40,736 --> 01:12:43,601
Uh, hi, Beth.
1239
01:12:43,704 --> 01:12:44,705
It's-It's me.
1240
01:12:44,809 --> 01:12:46,638
Uh, I'm alive!
1241
01:12:47,363 --> 01:12:49,400
Uh, listen, um...
1242
01:12:50,711 --> 01:12:51,747
Uh...
1243
01:12:53,196 --> 01:12:57,304
I'm-I'm sorry that
I blew up the book tour.
1244
01:12:57,408 --> 01:12:59,133
Um...
1245
01:12:59,237 --> 01:13:04,415
I was just afraid and...
selfish. Uh...
1246
01:13:04,620 --> 01:13:07,245
Oh, here comes Alan.
I'll call you back.
1247
01:13:10,421 --> 01:13:13,879
So, uh, the police
are searching for Fairfax,...
1248
01:13:13,880 --> 01:13:15,978
and they're gonna provide us
protection while we're here.
1249
01:13:16,200 --> 01:13:17,922
Did they say
how long we'd be here?
1250
01:13:18,420 --> 01:13:20,879
They're gonna try to get us on a
puddle jumper later this evening.
1251
01:13:20,880 --> 01:13:23,199
But, uh, they said in the
meantime, the inn is really nice,
1252
01:13:23,200 --> 01:13:25,677
and we can get cleaned up
and maybe a change of clothes.
1253
01:13:25,781 --> 01:13:27,196
Okay.
1254
01:13:30,648 --> 01:13:32,201
Okay. Yeah.
1255
01:14:24,978 --> 01:14:26,428
Thank you.
1256
01:14:27,014 --> 01:14:29,659
Come on.
[Dance with your husband.]
1257
01:14:29,660 --> 01:14:31,800
- Pardon?
- Dance with your husband.
1258
01:14:31,860 --> 01:14:33,600
- Oh, no, no, no.
- He's-He's not my husband.
1259
01:14:33,800 --> 01:14:35,439
- It's okay.
- Dance with him.
1260
01:14:35,440 --> 01:14:38,200
No, no. She doesn't want to
and she doesn't have the right shoes.
1261
01:14:38,229 --> 01:14:40,799
Actually, it's the only thing
these shoes are right for.
1262
01:14:40,999 --> 01:14:42,892
You don't have to do this.
1263
01:14:42,996 --> 01:14:44,756
It's okay. It's okay.
1264
01:14:45,654 --> 01:14:46,654
Yeah?
1265
01:16:05,250 --> 01:16:06,942
I wonder what she's saying.
1266
01:16:09,323 --> 01:16:10,808
It's folklore.
1267
01:16:12,223 --> 01:16:17,800
Love song about a woman whose lover died,
and she didn't want to leave his side.
1268
01:16:18,712 --> 01:16:21,543
So she laid down
and refused to get up.
1269
01:16:22,129 --> 01:16:23,890
Must be scary.
1270
01:16:23,900 --> 01:16:27,894
Having to face your future without
the person that you planned it with.
1271
01:16:40,251 --> 01:16:41,804
What was that?
1272
01:16:43,944 --> 01:16:47,603
Excuse me. Excuse me.
The, um... the last line that you sang.
1273
01:16:47,707 --> 01:16:50,054
¿Quién llorará junto a mí?
1274
01:16:52,988 --> 01:16:55,818
"The island will weep for me
in the well of endless tears."
1275
01:16:55,922 --> 01:16:59,304
What is that, the well of endless tears?
Is that a-a real place, or...
1276
01:16:59,600 --> 01:17:01,030
- Sinkhole place.
- A sinkhole...
1277
01:17:02,840 --> 01:17:04,551
Thank you.
Gracias, gracias.
1278
01:17:04,655 --> 01:17:06,726
- Here. Come here, come here.
- What is it?
1279
01:17:08,348 --> 01:17:10,299
Hey, on the parchment, it said,...
1280
01:17:10,300 --> 01:17:14,354
"King Kalaman and his treasure laid
to rest in the well of endless tears."
1281
01:17:14,457 --> 01:17:16,563
I thought maybe it was a metaphor.
1282
01:17:17,081 --> 01:17:18,634
It's not.
1283
01:17:18,738 --> 01:17:23,708
The Well of Endless Tears is a place.
It's a sinkhole.
1284
01:17:23,820 --> 01:17:25,986
There's a sinkhole on the map.
1285
01:17:27,360 --> 01:17:29,195
I think the tomb is there.
1286
01:17:29,400 --> 01:17:31,799
- This is so much better than your books.
- What?
1287
01:17:31,800 --> 01:17:33,489
There's like...
No, I don't mean any offense.
1288
01:17:33,490 --> 01:17:35,190
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- It's just... like, equal.
1289
01:17:35,300 --> 01:17:37,699
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- Look at you. You want to go there.
1290
01:17:37,800 --> 01:17:39,809
- What? No, no, no, no.
- I can see. You... yes, you do.
1291
01:17:39,810 --> 01:17:42,921
That would be insane.
That would be insane. I just... I just...
1292
01:17:42,960 --> 01:17:47,160
It's just that we're so close to it,
and I... I.. but, you know, we can't...
1293
01:17:47,200 --> 01:17:48,561
No.
1294
01:17:48,664 --> 01:17:51,356
This is your story.
How do you want to write it?
1295
01:17:52,150 --> 01:17:56,280
I'd like to know that it's there,
that all this meant something.
1296
01:17:56,300 --> 01:17:58,192
Okay. Then let's go.
1297
01:17:58,500 --> 01:18:00,409
We'll stay one more day.
As soon as the sun's up,...
1298
01:18:00,410 --> 01:18:01,889
we're gonna go find
the Well of Endless Tears.
1299
01:18:01,890 --> 01:18:05,099
- But what if it's nothing?
- So what? Then we say we tried.
1300
01:18:05,140 --> 01:18:06,350
And Fairfax?
1301
01:18:06,440 --> 01:18:08,857
The cops are after Fairfax.
Don't worry about him.
1302
01:18:09,961 --> 01:18:10,859
This is crazy.
1303
01:18:10,860 --> 01:18:12,550
- Yeah, but look at you.
- What?
1304
01:18:12,654 --> 01:18:15,640
It's the very first time
I've ever seen you totally unafraid.
1305
01:18:16,200 --> 01:18:17,969
And alive.
1306
01:18:18,072 --> 01:18:19,999
- I'm gonna go tell them our plans have changed
- What are you talking ab...
1307
01:18:20,000 --> 01:18:22,146
- ...and find us a ride.
- Where are you going?
1308
01:18:26,099 --> 01:18:27,886
I see you met my friend here.
1309
01:18:28,880 --> 01:18:32,499
He told me you were just
about to jump on a plane,...
1310
01:18:32,500 --> 01:18:34,800
without so much as
saying goodbye.
1311
01:18:35,200 --> 01:18:38,560
I said, "No way. Not my Loretta.
1312
01:18:38,900 --> 01:18:42,994
Not when she's the only one
who can lead me to the tomb."
1313
01:18:46,411 --> 01:18:48,482
Stop squeezing so hard.
1314
01:18:49,311 --> 01:18:52,107
Ow, ow. Get your hands off of me!
1315
01:18:52,850 --> 01:18:54,830
Ow! Hey!
1316
01:18:55,350 --> 01:18:56,525
I-I need a car.
1317
01:18:56,630 --> 01:18:58,580
A car, an auto.
Does anybody have an auto?
1318
01:19:07,060 --> 01:19:08,125
No, no.
1319
01:19:08,848 --> 01:19:10,159
I-I-I need an auto.
1320
01:19:10,263 --> 01:19:11,399
I'll trade you my watch.
1321
01:19:11,400 --> 01:19:13,199
It's a really expensive watch.
Do you have a car?
1322
01:19:13,200 --> 01:19:14,830
It's a Bulgari.
This thing glows in the dark.
1323
01:19:14,854 --> 01:19:16,660
- It's waterproof.
- I have motorcycle.
1324
01:19:30,248 --> 01:19:32,009
Cool, isn't it?
1325
01:19:32,010 --> 01:19:35,220
I always thought, why can't your
personal tank also have a minibar?
1326
01:19:35,422 --> 01:19:36,850
Have a drink.
1327
01:19:37,680 --> 01:19:39,481
- Do you mind?
- Uh, yes.
1328
01:19:39,482 --> 01:19:42,426
He has a bit of a grudge
against you, I'm afraid.
1329
01:19:42,640 --> 01:19:45,240
Something about a motorbike
accident his friends had?
1330
01:19:45,430 --> 01:19:46,402
Why are you doing this?
1331
01:19:46,506 --> 01:19:48,266
I want something
nobody else has.
1332
01:19:49,160 --> 01:19:50,900
When my father gifted...
1333
01:19:54,265 --> 01:20:01,176
As I was saying, when my father gifted
his empire to my... baby broth...
1334
01:20:08,217 --> 01:20:09,736
Who is that?
1335
01:20:18,469 --> 01:20:20,678
Is that a Ken doll on a moped?
1336
01:20:21,682 --> 01:20:22,991
I know him from somewhere.
1337
01:20:23,110 --> 01:20:24,820
Oh, I-I-I doubt that.
1338
01:20:24,999 --> 01:20:30,067
Because what you are looking at
is a highly trained combat specialist,
1339
01:20:30,170 --> 01:20:36,452
forged in the furnaces of Afghanistan,
Iraq, Kuwait, Sa... Sarasota...
1340
01:20:36,556 --> 01:20:38,825
Incredible skin.
No eczema problems.
1341
01:20:38,826 --> 01:20:45,019
And he will not stop until I am safe!
So you pull this space tank over,...
1342
01:20:45,020 --> 01:20:48,294
unless you would like to perish
like his friends did.
1343
01:20:48,295 --> 01:20:51,620
And he is responsible
for their perishment.
1344
01:20:51,666 --> 01:20:57,680
He might not have meant to,
but they... perished, so...
1345
01:21:12,646 --> 01:21:15,872
Okay, who-who is this?
I have seen him somewhere before.
1346
01:21:18,356 --> 01:21:21,428
No, no, no.
That's your cover model, isn't it?
1347
01:21:21,800 --> 01:21:23,810
Yes. I knew
I knew him from somewhere.
1348
01:21:24,710 --> 01:21:27,861
Get up there,
and kill him creatively.
1349
01:21:27,862 --> 01:21:29,500
I love watching hunks fail.
1350
01:21:31,882 --> 01:21:34,062
I guess I-I will
have that drink.
1351
01:21:35,853 --> 01:21:37,030
Oh, shit.
1352
01:21:37,644 --> 01:21:39,780
Is it okay
if I just top 'er off?
1353
01:21:39,800 --> 01:21:41,099
- Yeah, that's fine, but...
- Can I just...
1354
01:21:41,100 --> 01:21:44,486
- Oh, my God, have you used a glass before?
- Sorry. Sorry, sorry.
1355
01:21:44,589 --> 01:21:46,074
What would Jack Trainer do?
1356
01:21:48,283 --> 01:21:52,460
It's hot in here.
Anyone else feeling how hot it is?
1357
01:21:52,640 --> 01:21:53,805
Are you trying to be sexy?
1358
01:21:53,806 --> 01:21:55,535
This is very weird.
Please, stop.
1359
01:21:55,635 --> 01:21:57,533
I could set your world on fire.
1360
01:22:08,130 --> 01:22:10,443
- Go to sleep! Go to sleep!
- No! No!
1361
01:22:10,546 --> 01:22:12,272
Sleep! Sleep!
1362
01:22:14,688 --> 01:22:16,518
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1363
01:22:16,620 --> 01:22:17,689
Time-out.
1364
01:22:17,690 --> 01:22:18,500
Time-in!
1365
01:22:24,767 --> 01:22:27,598
No! Don't shoot her!
I need her!
1366
01:22:29,255 --> 01:22:31,119
Oh my, Jesus!
1367
01:22:31,222 --> 01:22:32,637
Ow, ow, ow.
1368
01:22:36,572 --> 01:22:38,989
Move your foot! Move your foot!
1369
01:22:42,061 --> 01:22:44,270
Go to sleep, asshole.
1370
01:22:44,373 --> 01:22:46,030
Get out there! Look!
1371
01:22:50,621 --> 01:22:51,933
A bigger guy?
1372
01:22:52,036 --> 01:22:53,244
Oh, no.
1373
01:22:54,590 --> 01:22:55,833
What?
1374
01:22:58,318 --> 01:22:59,318
Move it!
1375
01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:03,289
No, no, no. No, no, no.
1376
01:23:04,186 --> 01:23:06,085
Hey! Get in.
1377
01:23:06,602 --> 01:23:07,707
Him or me?
1378
01:23:11,814 --> 01:23:16,699
This is not one of your cheap,
vapid lady-fantasy books, Loretta.
1379
01:23:16,700 --> 01:23:18,683
This is real life.
1380
01:23:19,860 --> 01:23:21,559
And we will kill him.
1381
01:23:21,820 --> 01:23:23,309
Tell us where the tomb is.
1382
01:23:38,250 --> 01:23:42,020
Hi. So, whoever's in charge,
I need you to send officials to go here.
1383
01:23:42,120 --> 01:23:43,225
Here.
1384
01:23:44,364 --> 01:23:46,194
We are closed.
1385
01:23:46,292 --> 01:23:47,643
You're closed?
1386
01:23:49,576 --> 01:23:52,690
You know I've been trying to
take a nap for a year and a half?
1387
01:23:52,886 --> 01:23:54,340
A year and a half.
1388
01:23:55,272 --> 01:23:59,899
I have been burning the candle
at both ends, the midnight oil,...
1389
01:23:59,900 --> 01:24:02,900
since way before
my friend got kidnapped.
1390
01:24:03,250 --> 01:24:04,900
And all I want to do...
1391
01:24:05,400 --> 01:24:08,999
is kick my feet back
and drink some wine...
1392
01:24:09,000 --> 01:24:11,400
that I'm probably
too tired to drink.
1393
01:24:11,620 --> 01:24:13,499
And I want a massage.
1394
01:24:13,860 --> 01:24:18,459
I want someone to massage
my shoulders and my feet,...
1395
01:24:18,460 --> 01:24:20,420
and I want it at the same time.
1396
01:24:20,445 --> 01:24:24,261
And I don't care if logistically,
that doesn't make sense...
1397
01:24:24,262 --> 01:24:26,900
because I have worked hard.
1398
01:24:27,760 --> 01:24:30,205
The same way that
I know that you have.
1399
01:24:31,110 --> 01:24:33,411
So I hate to ask you...
1400
01:24:33,412 --> 01:24:35,889
to leave this place open
a few more minutes,...
1401
01:24:35,890 --> 01:24:37,840
because if we don't,...
1402
01:24:37,930 --> 01:24:43,354
a very close friend of mine
and her cover model are going to die.
1403
01:25:06,205 --> 01:25:07,758
No good way in, boss!
1404
01:25:07,861 --> 01:25:10,002
What about the caves?
1405
01:25:10,758 --> 01:25:12,100
That's too dangerous!
1406
01:25:12,210 --> 01:25:15,214
Well, we'll be very careful then.
1407
01:25:28,779 --> 01:25:30,092
Well, come on!
1408
01:25:34,885 --> 01:25:35,699
This way.
1409
01:25:35,700 --> 01:25:38,238
You know, I have a rule about
not going into super creepy caves.
1410
01:25:49,600 --> 01:25:52,599
- Julian?
- His name is Julian?
1411
01:25:52,700 --> 01:25:55,798
He seems more like
a Buck or a Bruce.
1412
01:25:55,799 --> 01:25:57,083
Lead the way.
1413
01:26:00,776 --> 01:26:03,158
Go on. Don't be scared.
1414
01:26:32,912 --> 01:26:34,699
Watch your step there.
1415
01:26:34,800 --> 01:26:36,099
- Argh!
- Bruce!
1416
01:26:36,100 --> 01:26:37,200
- Julian! Oh, no!
- Julian!
1417
01:26:37,600 --> 01:26:38,820
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
1418
01:26:39,480 --> 01:26:40,440
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
1419
01:26:41,200 --> 01:26:42,580
Well,...
1420
01:26:43,400 --> 01:26:45,140
let's not have
his death be in vain.
1421
01:26:45,645 --> 01:26:48,119
- Onward and upward.
- What do you mean onward? He's...
1422
01:26:48,120 --> 01:26:50,550
Well, we're not gonna go
and get him now, are we?
1423
01:26:50,650 --> 01:26:52,060
Oh, man.
1424
01:27:04,450 --> 01:27:06,118
- It's nothing.
- Okay.
1425
01:27:06,221 --> 01:27:09,019
Yeah. Look, let's just
go back to the boat.
1426
01:27:09,020 --> 01:27:10,944
This is over and nobody
else has to die. Okay?
1427
01:27:10,945 --> 01:27:13,159
Oh, no, no, no.
Ha-ha! It's a breeze.
1428
01:27:13,265 --> 01:27:16,199
There's a tunnel.
This could lead to the tomb.
1429
01:27:16,200 --> 01:27:17,989
- That's not person-sized.
- Ah, speak for yourself.
1430
01:27:17,990 --> 01:27:20,305
Come on.
It's practically a kiddie slide.
1431
01:27:20,306 --> 01:27:22,881
- More like a rock sphincter.
- Or a troll anus.
1432
01:27:22,882 --> 01:27:25,019
All right, well, you are
going through the anus...
1433
01:27:25,020 --> 01:27:26,499
The hole... The tunnel!
1434
01:27:26,600 --> 01:27:28,865
- Why her?
- You are our canary in the coal mine.
1435
01:27:28,866 --> 01:27:31,799
- No, no, that's impossible. I can't.
- Please let us know if you get through. Alright?
1436
01:27:31,800 --> 01:27:36,255
- If we don't hear from you, Fabio's got to die.
- Wait, I'm the damsel in distress?
1437
01:27:36,941 --> 01:27:38,184
It's okay. I'm fine.
1438
01:28:14,220 --> 01:28:16,671
I can't.
I'm so sorry. I can't.
1439
01:28:16,780 --> 01:28:18,500
- Hey.
- What?
1440
01:28:19,260 --> 01:28:21,300
Hey, you smell that?
1441
01:28:21,400 --> 01:28:24,799
You mean centuries worth of bat feces?
Yes, I definitely smell that.
1442
01:28:24,800 --> 01:28:26,543
You gotta take
a big breath for me.
1443
01:28:31,660 --> 01:28:33,050
There you go.
1444
01:28:33,450 --> 01:28:35,000
You can do it, Loretta.
1445
01:28:47,920 --> 01:28:50,706
I think... I see... a way out.
1446
01:28:54,260 --> 01:28:56,450
Oh, cheese and rice!
1447
01:29:01,180 --> 01:29:02,510
I made it!
1448
01:29:02,680 --> 01:29:04,097
I made it!
1449
01:29:04,800 --> 01:29:06,686
See? Totally safe.
1450
01:29:07,620 --> 01:29:08,760
Go on. Your turn.
1451
01:29:10,820 --> 01:29:13,348
I'm coming through!
Be right there, okay?
1452
01:30:17,620 --> 01:30:19,800
Why would they build this here?
1453
01:30:20,990 --> 01:30:24,599
But how is anyone supposed to worship
or remember you if they can't even see it?
1454
01:30:24,600 --> 01:30:26,248
They aren't.
1455
01:30:26,460 --> 01:30:29,400
This isn't a monument
to Kalaman's power.
1456
01:30:30,625 --> 01:30:33,327
It's a hiding place
for a grieving woman.
1457
01:30:33,628 --> 01:30:36,580
Taha came here
to be with her fallen lover.
1458
01:30:38,226 --> 01:30:39,676
She just wanted to be alone.
1459
01:30:41,440 --> 01:30:42,850
Taha doesn't want us here.
1460
01:30:42,955 --> 01:30:44,310
God, shut up, Rafi.
1461
01:30:44,405 --> 01:30:46,268
It's just the volcano.
1462
01:30:47,950 --> 01:30:49,235
Come on.
1463
01:30:54,500 --> 01:30:56,040
We have to keep going.
1464
01:31:04,628 --> 01:31:05,874
All right.
Let's go, Muscles.
1465
01:31:06,668 --> 01:31:08,500
Open it up.
1466
01:31:08,599 --> 01:31:11,419
- Don't disturb them.
- She will be wearing the headdress.
1467
01:31:11,420 --> 01:31:13,900
Come on. We didn't come all this
way just to pay our respects.
1468
01:31:14,250 --> 01:31:15,505
I can't, um...
1469
01:31:18,480 --> 01:31:20,475
- Uh...
- I'm sorry, abuela.
1470
01:31:41,900 --> 01:31:43,015
What is that?
1471
01:31:45,240 --> 01:31:47,880
Are those... seashells?
1472
01:31:48,380 --> 01:31:51,381
The crown is made of seashells?
1473
01:31:51,382 --> 01:31:52,852
Where's the treasure?
1474
01:31:53,853 --> 01:31:55,302
She's holding him.
1475
01:31:58,000 --> 01:31:59,860
Who...
You mean the dead guy?
1476
01:32:06,383 --> 01:32:07,591
Look.
1477
01:32:09,593 --> 01:32:11,699
It's their courtship.
1478
01:32:11,799 --> 01:32:15,323
Kalaman is searching
the island for something.
1479
01:32:18,153 --> 01:32:20,098
Rare red seashells.
1480
01:32:20,299 --> 01:32:24,999
To prove his love, he gave her
one shell every day for a year...
1481
01:32:25,000 --> 01:32:29,611
and made them into a crown,
bright red like the flame of their love,
1482
01:32:29,612 --> 01:32:32,990
until the day came
where she accepted his proposal.
1483
01:32:32,996 --> 01:32:34,756
It was never about jewels.
1484
01:32:35,199 --> 01:32:38,790
Kalaman and Taha's riches
weren't material.
1485
01:32:40,580 --> 01:32:42,460
It was their love.
1486
01:32:42,650 --> 01:32:45,098
That's what it meant.
That was enough.
1487
01:32:45,099 --> 01:32:46,216
So that's it?
1488
01:32:47,110 --> 01:32:54,599
All of that time and money spent on,
what, just a cheap metaphor?
1489
01:32:54,900 --> 01:32:57,480
- It's a pretty rich metaphor.
- Oh, shut up!
1490
01:32:57,980 --> 01:32:59,699
We got to go. We got to go.
We got to go now. Come on.
1491
01:32:59,700 --> 01:33:03,099
- Let's go.
- No, no, no. You are staying here.
1492
01:33:03,100 --> 01:33:05,227
You think it's all
so sweet and poetic.
1493
01:33:05,228 --> 01:33:07,639
Well, then you can stay here
and spend your last moments...
1494
01:33:07,640 --> 01:33:10,560
pondering the richness
of that metaphor.
1495
01:33:11,241 --> 01:33:13,580
- Get in.
- What? Come on, man.
1496
01:33:13,650 --> 01:33:16,119
- Oh, God. Just get in. Get in the tomb.
- Okay, okay.
1497
01:33:16,120 --> 01:33:18,599
It's better to be buried alive
than buried dead, I guess.
1498
01:33:18,600 --> 01:33:22,600
- Ah, it's really not.
- You know, it is a shame, really.
1499
01:33:22,680 --> 01:33:24,199
This is a hell of a story.
1500
01:33:24,400 --> 01:33:26,640
Pity you won't be around
to tell it. Come on.
1501
01:33:26,920 --> 01:33:29,005
- But they'll die.
- So will you if you don't stop...
1502
01:33:29,006 --> 01:33:30,985
being such a snowflake!
Get over here!
1503
01:33:40,720 --> 01:33:44,244
This is fine. This is not an active nightmare
that I've had since I was 14 years old.
1504
01:33:45,588 --> 01:33:46,442
Ow! Ow!
1505
01:33:47,800 --> 01:33:51,422
Oh, why are you going so fast?
It's not a race.
1506
01:33:56,424 --> 01:33:58,737
Wait, no! Where are you going?
Come back here!
1507
01:33:58,840 --> 01:34:03,535
You may have bought the island,
but now the island owns you!
1508
01:34:04,397 --> 01:34:05,882
You can't just leave me here!
1509
01:34:07,918 --> 01:34:10,300
Rafi! Come back!
1510
01:34:12,474 --> 01:34:13,890
I need a boat!
1511
01:34:23,313 --> 01:34:25,418
Hey, hey, stop! Stop!
1512
01:34:27,460 --> 01:34:29,299
Help! Help!
1513
01:34:29,422 --> 01:34:31,566
One of the locals
just stole my boat!
1514
01:34:31,900 --> 01:34:33,499
Have you seen a woman?
1515
01:34:33,500 --> 01:34:36,568
She's a brunette
in a sequined jumpsuit.
1516
01:34:36,822 --> 01:34:40,680
No. Is she in some sort of trouble?
1517
01:34:52,444 --> 01:34:54,080
It's kind of funny.
1518
01:34:55,486 --> 01:34:57,299
I used to think this...
1519
01:34:57,500 --> 01:34:59,280
this sort of thing
was so romantic.
1520
01:34:59,400 --> 01:35:00,764
Yeah?
1521
01:35:00,888 --> 01:35:04,379
Being locked in a coffin
about to be buried by lava,...
1522
01:35:04,380 --> 01:35:06,908
or... cuddling dead people?
1523
01:35:07,702 --> 01:35:10,850
Just laying down
with a lost love.
1524
01:35:10,890 --> 01:35:12,086
Like Taha did.
1525
01:35:14,640 --> 01:35:15,848
- God.
- Oh...
1526
01:35:16,435 --> 01:35:17,816
Oh, God.
1527
01:35:17,940 --> 01:35:20,120
I'm sorry.
1528
01:35:20,452 --> 01:35:22,590
I'm sorry that
I couldn't save you.
1529
01:35:22,786 --> 01:35:24,754
I'm sorry I couldn't be Dash.
1530
01:35:25,340 --> 01:35:26,618
You're right.
1531
01:35:27,650 --> 01:35:29,499
You're nothing like Dash.
1532
01:35:29,999 --> 01:35:32,600
You didn't ride in on
a white horse to save me.
1533
01:35:32,999 --> 01:35:37,999
You rode in on a...
borrowed scooter with a broken muffler.
1534
01:35:39,216 --> 01:35:40,632
Yeah.
1535
01:35:40,845 --> 01:35:43,699
I never could've written
a Dash like you.
1536
01:35:45,880 --> 01:35:47,866
'Cause I never knew...
1537
01:35:48,160 --> 01:35:49,999
a Dash like Alan.
1538
01:35:50,265 --> 01:35:54,245
I was so afraid of being hurt
by life again that I just stopped living.
1539
01:35:54,246 --> 01:35:59,685
Couldn't see the good things in front of me.
I'm just so sorry I didn't see you sooner.
1540
01:36:00,652 --> 01:36:02,380
I have a confession too.
1541
01:36:02,690 --> 01:36:06,685
See, I was really liking where
this new story of ours was headed.
1542
01:36:06,886 --> 01:36:09,695
I just wanted to see how
it was gonna turn out, I guess.
1543
01:36:11,010 --> 01:36:13,599
The Adventures
of Loretta and Alan.
1544
01:36:15,667 --> 01:36:19,672
- No, it would need a better title than that.
- Yeah, definitely. Definitely.
1545
01:36:20,820 --> 01:36:24,610
- Are you okay?
- Sorry. Just... Taha's femur is poking me.
1546
01:36:28,562 --> 01:36:30,060
Rafi must have left that.
1547
01:36:30,400 --> 01:36:32,981
How do you forget your crowbar?
It's gonna help us escape.
1548
01:36:32,982 --> 01:36:36,224
- No, he left it on purpose.
- Oh, cool. I always liked him.
1549
01:36:36,588 --> 01:36:37,827
- One,...
- Okay.
1550
01:36:37,928 --> 01:36:39,699
- two, three!
- Okay.
1551
01:36:40,060 --> 01:36:43,695
I-I would've preferred him to not leave
us here in the first place, but...
1552
01:36:44,385 --> 01:36:45,385
Okay.
1553
01:37:06,300 --> 01:37:08,490
Dulcius ex asperis.
1554
01:37:13,200 --> 01:37:14,826
Sweeter after difficulty.
1555
01:37:21,200 --> 01:37:22,810
Go up! Go up!
Run for the trees!
1556
01:37:24,100 --> 01:37:26,910
Wait. Wait. Nope. Nope.
Never mind. Trees are on fire.
1557
01:37:27,360 --> 01:37:28,960
Okay.
1558
01:37:30,680 --> 01:37:32,502
We can go back through the tunnel.
1559
01:37:33,599 --> 01:37:34,999
Nope. Tunnel's a no-go.
1560
01:37:40,050 --> 01:37:45,490
- Um, okay. I'm open to other ideas.
- There's a current. We can follow it into the ocean.
1561
01:37:45,890 --> 01:37:48,894
- How do we know it's on the other side?
- We don't.
1562
01:37:50,625 --> 01:37:52,764
There's only one way
to find out.
1563
01:37:54,620 --> 01:37:55,974
- Worth the rash.
- Yeah?
1564
01:38:16,960 --> 01:38:17,966
Alan?
1565
01:38:26,600 --> 01:38:27,660
Alan!
1566
01:39:05,299 --> 01:39:06,115
Alan?
1567
01:39:06,416 --> 01:39:07,810
A-Alan?
1568
01:39:08,000 --> 01:39:08,940
Alan?
1569
01:39:10,100 --> 01:39:11,118
Alan!
1570
01:39:14,397 --> 01:39:16,280
Oh, my God! You're alive!
1571
01:39:16,440 --> 01:39:18,480
- I'm alive.
- Oh, my God. I thought I killed you.
1572
01:39:21,450 --> 01:39:22,450
Is that Beth?
1573
01:39:22,640 --> 01:39:23,760
Loretta!
1574
01:39:24,372 --> 01:39:25,546
Beth!
1575
01:39:25,750 --> 01:39:27,160
- Beth!
- Beth!
1576
01:39:27,200 --> 01:39:28,444
- Beth!
- Beth!
1577
01:39:34,410 --> 01:39:35,699
Beth, you're here!
1578
01:39:36,420 --> 01:39:37,560
Why are you here?
1579
01:39:37,661 --> 01:39:40,457
I told you I got your back, girl!
1580
01:39:41,060 --> 01:39:42,860
I'm so sorry!
1581
01:39:42,950 --> 01:39:45,060
I destroyed the jumpsuit!
1582
01:39:45,497 --> 01:39:49,180
- What?
- Never mind! Later.
1583
01:39:49,445 --> 01:39:51,467
I found a British guy in a cave.
1584
01:39:51,468 --> 01:39:53,900
I thought he was a little boy,
but he has a full beard.
1585
01:39:54,022 --> 01:39:57,599
Beth, that's Fairfax!
He kidnapped us!
1586
01:39:57,720 --> 01:40:00,242
He's a bad guy, Beth!
He killed my trainer!
1587
01:40:00,280 --> 01:40:01,268
Get him!
1588
01:40:01,685 --> 01:40:02,859
Stop him!
1589
01:40:10,700 --> 01:40:12,910
I got your back, girl.
1590
01:40:15,240 --> 01:40:17,020
Where were you running?
It's a boat.
1591
01:40:17,255 --> 01:40:18,680
This guy's hilarious.
1592
01:40:19,299 --> 01:40:20,479
Got you.
1593
01:40:20,844 --> 01:40:21,865
Swim over to the rock!
1594
01:40:21,950 --> 01:40:24,428
- I don't got you. I don't know... I got you.
- No, I got you.
1595
01:40:24,440 --> 01:40:26,481
We're gonna get you.
It's gonna be okay.
1596
01:40:26,482 --> 01:40:31,224
"Finding refuge on a nearby rock,
he lifted her from the water,...
1597
01:40:31,225 --> 01:40:38,299
his powerful arms pulling her body close.
Alan whispered, "Shh. You're safe now."
1598
01:40:40,880 --> 01:40:45,199
In that moment, Loretta could feel
a new adventure was just beginning.
1599
01:40:46,660 --> 01:40:52,300
The heart-pounding passion of the narrow escape
only inflamed Loretta's desire for him.
1600
01:40:52,322 --> 01:40:56,819
She was thirsty for the hot lava
soon to be pulsing from his..."
1601
01:40:56,820 --> 01:41:00,258
Don't you go stopping
right at the good part.
1602
01:41:01,480 --> 01:41:03,388
It's nothing she hasn't
read before.
1603
01:41:03,437 --> 01:41:08,227
Didn't I tell you?
The most beautiful beach in the world.
1604
01:41:08,228 --> 01:41:13,398
- Maybe later, I'll show you the Cove of Enchantment?
- No, you can take Randy.
1605
01:41:13,399 --> 01:41:19,936
- Remember, you are my platonic man friend.
- Platonic? I like the sound of that.
1606
01:41:20,240 --> 01:41:22,889
Not sure what it means,
but I like the sound of it.
1607
01:41:22,900 --> 01:41:25,010
Here you go, Randy.
1608
01:41:26,800 --> 01:41:29,200
- My dear.
- You are an angel. Thank you.
1609
01:41:29,750 --> 01:41:31,160
How did you know?
1610
01:41:43,400 --> 01:41:45,899
- Nice way to end a book tour, right?
- Mmm-hmm.
1611
01:41:47,422 --> 01:41:48,240
Um...
1612
01:41:48,444 --> 01:41:52,609
You know, I have a... I have a phrase
I like to use in moments like these, actually.
1613
01:41:52,610 --> 01:41:53,935
- Mmm-hmm.
- Um...
1614
01:41:55,420 --> 01:41:56,835
Quid deinde?
1615
01:41:58,120 --> 01:42:01,246
It's Latin.
It means, uh, "What's next?"
1616
01:42:03,048 --> 01:42:04,567
Quid cogitas?
1617
01:42:04,760 --> 01:42:06,080
Mmm.
1618
01:42:06,799 --> 01:42:07,950
Buca di Beppo.
1619
01:42:11,399 --> 01:42:13,499
- Yeah. I know zero other Latin.
- No. Yes.
1620
01:42:13,600 --> 01:42:16,061
I looked it up
for this moment right now.
1621
01:42:17,899 --> 01:42:19,030
So, what does come next?
1622
01:42:19,440 --> 01:42:21,965
- How would you write this?
- I don't know.
1623
01:42:21,966 --> 01:42:24,479
- How would you write it?
- Do we really want me to write this?
1624
01:42:24,480 --> 01:42:27,079
- Just try. Take a stab at it.
- Okay. I'll write it.
1625
01:42:27,080 --> 01:42:28,170
Okay.
1626
01:42:28,280 --> 01:42:31,590
"We were... They were, uh...
standing on a beach."
1627
01:42:31,620 --> 01:42:33,839
Sets the stage for the audience.
They know where we are.
1628
01:42:33,840 --> 01:42:35,499
You're already laughing.
Why are you laughing at me?
1629
01:42:35,500 --> 01:42:37,450
- I'm not laughing. I'm smiling.
- You are.
1630
01:42:37,460 --> 01:42:44,999
"There are palm trees above a brown
bark-like hair of the maiden.
1631
01:42:45,169 --> 01:42:47,179
- There is a dead jellyfish."
- All you're doing is describing...
1632
01:42:47,180 --> 01:42:49,312
what you're actually seeing right now.
1633
01:42:49,336 --> 01:42:52,166
"He's nervous because he really likes her."
1634
01:42:53,140 --> 01:42:55,140
It's nice writing.
1635
01:42:55,290 --> 01:42:56,599
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
1636
01:42:56,600 --> 01:42:57,699
- I'll keep going.
- Okay.
1637
01:42:57,792 --> 01:42:59,400
"He looked deep in her eyes.
1638
01:42:59,484 --> 01:43:02,950
The only thing that could compare
to the pulse of that ocean...
1639
01:43:03,846 --> 01:43:05,599
- was the throbbing in the..."
- Oh, no, no.
1640
01:43:05,600 --> 01:43:08,009
- Okay, no, you can't throb.
- Okay. Why not?
1641
01:43:08,280 --> 01:43:10,139
Can't come out of the
gate with a throb.
1642
01:43:10,140 --> 01:43:12,649
- You throb all the time.
- I don't come out of the gate with it.
1643
01:43:12,650 --> 01:43:14,899
- You have to earn the throb.
- Who made you the Queen of Throb?
1644
01:43:14,900 --> 01:43:18,417
Look, it's usually a chapter four thing.
You want it brought up appropriately in four.
1645
01:43:18,418 --> 01:43:22,400
- I think you throb in all the chapters. "Pulsating."
- It's-It's a precursor to throb.
1646
01:43:22,500 --> 01:43:24,840
- "Undulating."
- You just jumped to five.
1647
01:43:24,960 --> 01:43:27,511
- How 'bout they just kiss? Why not?
- Just like a regular kiss?
1648
01:43:27,512 --> 01:43:31,100
- Yeah. Like a beginning-of-the-chapter kiss.
- I'm good at starting...
1649
01:43:35,100 --> 01:43:36,499
How was that? Any notes?
1650
01:43:37,345 --> 01:43:40,700
- Very good first chapter attempt.
- ♪ Hey daddy, when you gon' stop playing? ♪
1651
01:43:42,080 --> 01:43:43,799
♪ Bad chick, I could be your fantasy ♪
1652
01:43:43,800 --> 01:43:46,289
♪ I can tell you got big, big energy ♪
1653
01:43:46,290 --> 01:43:48,425
♪ It ain't too many of 'em that can handle me ♪
1654
01:43:48,426 --> 01:43:50,594
♪ But I might let you try it off the Hennessy ♪
1655
01:43:50,595 --> 01:43:52,939
♪ Make 'em sing to this thing like a melody ♪
1656
01:43:52,940 --> 01:43:55,298
♪ And if your girl ain't right, I got the remedy ♪
1657
01:43:55,299 --> 01:43:57,700
♪ It ain't too many of 'em that can handle me ♪
1658
01:43:57,780 --> 01:44:00,280
♪ Bad chick, I could be your fantasy ♪
1659
01:44:00,700 --> 01:44:01,821
♪ Tell me how you want it ♪
1660
01:44:01,822 --> 01:44:03,517
♪ Three, two, one and I'm on it ♪
1661
01:44:03,518 --> 01:44:04,679
♪ Feel good, don't it? ♪
1662
01:44:04,680 --> 01:44:06,129
♪ Hood chick, you in a bonnet ♪
1663
01:44:06,130 --> 01:44:08,099
♪ I'ma bust it on a pole like Onyx ♪
1664
01:44:08,100 --> 01:44:09,498
♪ I'm just being honest ♪
1665
01:44:09,499 --> 01:44:11,024
♪ Juicy, Minute Maid ♪
1666
01:44:11,025 --> 01:44:12,949
♪ But can't do it one minute, man ♪
1667
01:44:12,950 --> 01:44:15,649
♪ Not a side or a main,
I'm the only one he entertain ♪
1668
01:44:15,650 --> 01:44:17,732
- ♪ Spending his, mine in the bank ♪
- ♪ In the bank ♪
1669
01:44:17,830 --> 01:44:19,224
♪ I like what I see ♪
1670
01:44:19,225 --> 01:44:21,709
♪ A boss like you need a boss like me ♪
1671
01:44:21,710 --> 01:44:23,639
♪ Daddy from the streets, so he move low-key ♪
1672
01:44:23,640 --> 01:44:26,100
♪ Tryna rock that mic' like karaoke ♪
1673
01:44:26,160 --> 01:44:28,819
- ♪ On the count of three, bad get money ♪
- ♪ Get money ♪
1674
01:44:28,820 --> 01:44:30,779
- ♪ Broke to the left, we 'on't want it ♪
- ♪ We 'on't want it ♪
1675
01:44:30,780 --> 01:44:33,319
♪ I'm the one they love to hate,
but they can't get past ♪
1676
01:44:33,320 --> 01:44:36,200
♪ Pretty face, no waist, and a big ol' back ♪
1677
01:44:36,340 --> 01:44:38,339
♪ Bad chick, I could be your fantasy ♪
1678
01:44:38,340 --> 01:44:40,588
♪ I can tell you got big, big energy ♪
1679
01:44:40,589 --> 01:44:42,909
♪ It ain't too many of 'em that can handle me ♪
1680
01:44:42,910 --> 01:44:45,129
♪ But I might let you try it off the Hennessy ♪
1681
01:44:45,130 --> 01:44:47,299
♪ Make 'em sing to this thing like a melody ♪
1682
01:44:47,300 --> 01:44:49,869
♪ And if your girl ain't right, I got the remedy ♪
1683
01:44:49,870 --> 01:44:51,899
♪ It ain't too many of 'em that can handle me ♪
1684
01:44:51,999 --> 01:44:54,559
♪ Bad chick, I could be your fantasy ♪
1685
01:44:54,560 --> 01:44:58,180
- ♪ Got that real big energy ♪
- ♪ Energy ♪
1686
01:45:05,900 --> 01:45:07,080
Psst!
1687
01:45:08,060 --> 01:45:09,550
Psst.
1688
01:45:10,890 --> 01:45:11,890
Psst.
1689
01:45:13,520 --> 01:45:14,550
Soy... Mother...
1690
01:45:15,099 --> 01:45:16,249
You were dead.
1691
01:45:16,250 --> 01:45:19,799
Your brains came out of your face
and hit the back of my throat.
1692
01:45:19,800 --> 01:45:22,019
- He was in my mouth.
- Don't say he was in your mouth.
1693
01:45:22,020 --> 01:45:23,599
- I could taste you.
- Don't ever say that.
1694
01:45:23,600 --> 01:45:29,100
Yeah, we only use 10% of our brain,
so I just switched to another 10%.
1695
01:45:29,400 --> 01:45:32,109
So... So..., you're-you're okay?
1696
01:45:32,110 --> 01:45:33,991
One hundred percent.
1697
01:45:33,992 --> 01:45:35,600
Meaning 10%.
1698
01:45:35,899 --> 01:45:37,439
We thought you were dead.
1699
01:45:37,440 --> 01:45:40,279
Naturally, I have some anger
issues I need to let go of.
1700
01:45:40,280 --> 01:45:42,480
- Oh, of course.
- And resentment.
1701
01:45:44,580 --> 01:45:45,700
So good to see you, man.
1702
01:45:45,999 --> 01:45:48,099
Okay, let's keep the chatter down.
1703
01:45:48,100 --> 01:45:52,350
We're closing our eyes
and reconnecting to our breath.
1704
01:45:53,412 --> 01:45:54,522
Great.
1705
01:45:55,340 --> 01:45:56,350
Great.
1706
01:46:02,129 --> 01:52:00,000
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