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1
00:00:03,210 --> 00:00:04,790
* My eyesare gettin' weary*
2
00:00:04,830 --> 00:00:07,290
* My back is gettin' tight*
3
00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:09,210
* I'm sittin' herein traffic*
4
00:00:09,250 --> 00:00:12,300
* On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
5
00:00:12,340 --> 00:00:17,550
* But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
6
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:21,220
* Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
7
00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:25,100
* 'Cause, baby,all my life*
8
00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:28,570
* I will be drivin' hometo you*
9
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:38,870
Darlin', have you seen
my passport?
10
00:00:38,910 --> 00:00:41,660
I'm leaving soon and I
really should have it.
11
00:00:41,700 --> 00:00:43,660
Dad, you're going
to New Jersey.
12
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,290
Still, border crossings
are nothing
13
00:00:45,330 --> 00:00:46,710
to be taken lightly.
14
00:00:46,750 --> 00:00:49,130
I'm afraid I learned
that the hard way.
15
00:00:50,250 --> 00:00:51,210
I think it's sweet
that you visit
16
00:00:51,250 --> 00:00:53,210
Mom's grave every year.
17
00:00:53,260 --> 00:00:54,880
I can't believe
it's been 20 years.
18
00:00:54,920 --> 00:00:56,720
I know, and it's
a shame she never saw
19
00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:59,350
what a beautiful young
woman you've become.
20
00:00:59,390 --> 00:01:01,140
Thank you, Dad.
21
00:01:01,180 --> 00:01:04,730
As always, I'll send her
your warmest regards.
22
00:01:04,770 --> 00:01:06,560
You know, actually,
I think I'm gonna--
23
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,150
I'm gonna come
with you this time.
24
00:01:08,190 --> 00:01:10,730
Why? You--you--
you never come.
25
00:01:10,770 --> 00:01:13,230
I know. Well, I was
a teenager when she died,
26
00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:15,240
and I think
I was angry at her
27
00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:16,820
for leaving me
without a mother,
28
00:01:16,860 --> 00:01:19,320
especially when I had
to go bra shopping with you.
29
00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:21,450
In retrospect,
I should've let you
30
00:01:21,490 --> 00:01:23,580
go into the dressing
room by yourself.
31
00:01:24,620 --> 00:01:25,790
Anyway, I'll see you
on Monday.
32
00:01:25,830 --> 00:01:27,210
Dad, I said I'm gonna
come with you.
33
00:01:27,250 --> 00:01:28,290
You can't!
34
00:01:28,330 --> 00:01:29,330
Why not?
35
00:01:29,380 --> 00:01:31,800
[SIGHS] I, uh...
36
00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:33,800
I'm staying with
your uncle Chester,
37
00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:35,760
and he likes to walk
around in the nude.
38
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:37,340
I won't have you
see that again!
39
00:01:38,300 --> 00:01:39,430
Then we'll stay
in a motel.
40
00:01:39,470 --> 00:01:41,930
Just give me a half hour
to get packed.
41
00:01:41,970 --> 00:01:43,850
Hmm.
42
00:01:43,890 --> 00:01:45,180
Hey, babe, listen,
43
00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:46,430
I'm going up
to New Jersey
44
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,810
with my father
45
00:01:47,850 --> 00:01:49,650
to visit my mom's grave
for the weekend.
46
00:01:49,690 --> 00:01:51,190
You're gonna be gone
the whole weekend?
47
00:01:51,230 --> 00:01:52,730
All right, you know what?
Could you at least
48
00:01:52,770 --> 00:01:55,190
pretend you're gonna
miss me?
49
00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:57,650
Of course I'm gonna
miss you. I am. Okay?
50
00:02:04,370 --> 00:02:06,160
Which one of these
goes better with Steak-umms?
51
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,830
Um, I really don't know.
52
00:02:07,870 --> 00:02:09,290
I'm really intrigued by these
"Flamin' Hot" ones,
53
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:10,750
but I hear
if you eat the whole bag,
54
00:02:10,790 --> 00:02:12,710
your tongue gets swollen.
55
00:02:12,750 --> 00:02:14,670
My manager just told me
to stack the bean dip.
56
00:02:16,260 --> 00:02:17,300
Now, you know you're
gonna get 'em both,
57
00:02:17,340 --> 00:02:18,720
so why the dance?
58
00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:19,970
Ray! I can't believe it!
59
00:02:20,010 --> 00:02:21,970
Hey, man! What's it been,
like, 2 years?
60
00:02:22,010 --> 00:02:23,720
-At least.
-Yeah.
61
00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:25,930
What do we do? Do we shake?
You don't hug, right?
62
00:02:25,970 --> 00:02:27,930
I do. With some people,
I do. Yeah.
63
00:02:27,980 --> 00:02:30,190
All right. Cool.
64
00:02:30,230 --> 00:02:31,810
What are you doing here?
65
00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,520
You're not the only one
who eats, man.
66
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:34,690
What do you got
goin' on here?
67
00:02:34,730 --> 00:02:37,650
Uh, a log of salami,
chips, and cheese.
68
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:39,280
I guess you're not
buyin' into the whole
69
00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:40,530
cholesterol thing, huh?
70
00:02:40,570 --> 00:02:41,780
Oh, I'm buyin' into it,
I just want to see
71
00:02:41,820 --> 00:02:43,200
how high I can
get the numbers.
72
00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:44,830
So what have you
been up to?
73
00:02:44,870 --> 00:02:46,330
Nothin'. You know,
74
00:02:46,370 --> 00:02:47,580
they're doin' the floors
at my house,
75
00:02:47,620 --> 00:02:48,910
so Debra took the kids
to Connecticut,
76
00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,330
and I'm sleepin'
at my mom's.
77
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:51,960
Oh, my God.
That sounds like fun.
78
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:53,710
Yeah. Well,
it's been a while
79
00:02:53,750 --> 00:02:56,300
since I woke up covered
in Vicks Vapo-Rub.
80
00:02:57,800 --> 00:02:59,340
Yeah, I hear that.
81
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:00,680
Hey, you know what?
82
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,220
Carrie's out with her
dad this whole weekend.
83
00:03:02,260 --> 00:03:03,850
She's gone. Why don't
you just
84
00:03:03,890 --> 00:03:05,760
crash at my place?
It'll be fun.
85
00:03:05,810 --> 00:03:07,310
-Yeah?
-Yeah!
86
00:03:07,350 --> 00:03:09,270
Think about it.
Just me and you, right?
87
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:11,480
No skirts givin' us
the yap-yap. Ha ha!
88
00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:13,230
Hey, you know what? Yeah.
89
00:03:13,270 --> 00:03:15,570
Yeah, yeah. Let me
just ask my mom--tell.
90
00:03:15,610 --> 00:03:17,530
I'm gonna...
91
00:03:19,740 --> 00:03:22,240
Hey, Ma. Ma, listen,
a change of plans.
92
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:25,370
I'm gonna sleep at
my friend Doug's house.
93
00:03:25,410 --> 00:03:28,240
No, this is not my way
of telling you I'm gay.
94
00:03:29,410 --> 00:03:32,000
I don't know how
I would tell you, Ma.
95
00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:33,710
All right, I'm hangin' up.
I'm hangin' up, Ma.
96
00:03:35,380 --> 00:03:36,460
That's the answering machine.
We're good. We're good.
97
00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:37,800
-Okay.
-Yeah.
98
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:44,840
It's this way,
just past Ethel Merman.
99
00:03:44,890 --> 00:03:47,430
Your mother is laid to rest
among Broadway Royalty.
100
00:03:47,470 --> 00:03:50,270
Dad, that says
Ethel Melman.
101
00:03:51,020 --> 00:03:52,520
Wait, wait.
102
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,480
You haven't seen
your mother in 20 years.
103
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:57,980
I want her grave
to look ship-shape.
104
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,580
[POPS LIPS]
105
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,420
Sophia,
I'm sorry I'm late.
106
00:04:17,460 --> 00:04:19,920
I had a little dispute
with a toll-taker
107
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,630
over their
"No pennies" policy.
108
00:04:22,670 --> 00:04:23,970
More about that later.
109
00:04:25,010 --> 00:04:26,090
I have a little surprise.
110
00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:27,800
I brought your daughter
to see you.
111
00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:32,600
Hi, Mom.
112
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:35,400
Sorry it's taken me
so long to get here,
113
00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:36,770
but I want you to know
that I love you.
114
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:38,110
Good stuff.
Now, let's go.
115
00:04:38,150 --> 00:04:39,820
Dad, could you
give me a minute?
116
00:04:42,820 --> 00:04:44,360
It's a beautiful
stone, Dad.
117
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,610
Thank you.
118
00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:48,780
"Sophia Spooner,
beloved wife of Arthur,
119
00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:51,370
devoted mother to..."
120
00:04:51,410 --> 00:04:53,620
Oh, the flowers are
covering my name.
121
00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:55,790
Not everything's
about you. Let's go!
122
00:04:55,830 --> 00:04:57,580
This place give me
the creeps!
123
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:02,460
"Devoted mother to...
124
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:04,380
Simone?"
125
00:05:04,420 --> 00:05:05,800
I never noticed that.
126
00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:07,970
Must be a typo.
Shall we?
127
00:05:08,010 --> 00:05:09,510
Dad, what--
what's going on?
128
00:05:09,550 --> 00:05:11,470
Why isn't my name
there?
129
00:05:11,510 --> 00:05:13,560
[SIGHS]
130
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:15,350
It's a long story,
darlin'.
131
00:05:16,980 --> 00:05:19,480
You remember
your cousin Simone?
132
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,820
[GASPS] Cousin Simone
is my sister?
133
00:05:22,860 --> 00:05:24,690
No, no. Nothing like that.
134
00:05:25,530 --> 00:05:26,700
You'reSimone.
135
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,000
Up to you.
136
00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:35,410
Are you almost done,
Daddy?
137
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:38,710
Uh, no, Simone.
Daddy's still playing.
138
00:05:38,750 --> 00:05:40,460
Are you winning?
139
00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:42,670
If you must know,
I'm down $600.
140
00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:44,510
Oy.
141
00:05:46,130 --> 00:05:48,800
Why don't you go play
with your cousin Carrie?
142
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:50,140
Okay.
143
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,970
Well, it's just
you and me, Chester.
144
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:55,730
All right. All right.
145
00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:59,520
I'm gonna raise you
another 50.
146
00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:02,110
I don't have
that much left.
147
00:06:02,150 --> 00:06:03,730
Hey, you're the big shot
who wanted to play
148
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:05,110
for high stakes, Arthur.
149
00:06:05,150 --> 00:06:06,950
All right.
All right. Uh...
150
00:06:06,990 --> 00:06:08,820
how about I give you
this wristwatch
151
00:06:08,860 --> 00:06:10,570
and the spare key
to my neighbor's house, huh?
152
00:06:11,740 --> 00:06:13,700
Ah, that's not gonna
cut it, Arthur.
153
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:17,160
But you do have
something I want.
154
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:18,540
What?
155
00:06:18,580 --> 00:06:19,830
Your daughter's name.
156
00:06:19,870 --> 00:06:21,500
You want to play
for "Simone"?!
157
00:06:21,540 --> 00:06:23,460
You knew we wanted
that name
158
00:06:23,500 --> 00:06:24,590
for our
little girl!
159
00:06:24,630 --> 00:06:25,840
You stole it from us!
160
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,720
Well, the premature bird
gets the worm!
161
00:06:29,260 --> 00:06:30,680
Are you in
or you out?
162
00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:43,440
You lost my name
in a poker game?!
163
00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:45,860
I had a straight
to the ace.
164
00:06:45,900 --> 00:06:48,070
That he pulled a flush
is unheard of!
165
00:06:57,620 --> 00:06:59,830
[TV PLAYING INDISTINCTLY]
166
00:06:59,870 --> 00:07:03,170
Ha! I love
the wallpaper guy, man.
167
00:07:03,210 --> 00:07:05,340
Always yellin'
at the plumber.
168
00:07:05,380 --> 00:07:07,380
You know, it would be cool
if they had a nail-gun fight.
169
00:07:09,340 --> 00:07:11,220
That plumber would
beat him senseless.
170
00:07:11,260 --> 00:07:14,010
I don't know, man.
Wallpaper guy's tough.
171
00:07:14,050 --> 00:07:15,140
Yeah, but that plumber,
172
00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:16,560
he's got, like,
crazy eyes.
173
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:18,390
You know,
he's like this.
174
00:07:18,430 --> 00:07:20,270
Uh--ha. All right.
Easy. Yeah.
175
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,520
Now let's put that
cheerleading thing back on.
176
00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:26,150
It's over.
Midland, Texas won.
177
00:07:26,190 --> 00:07:28,190
What?! Oh, see? That's
why I stopped betting.
178
00:07:28,230 --> 00:07:29,360
It's all fixed.
179
00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:32,610
[SIGHS HEAVILY]
180
00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,200
Uh...
181
00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:37,330
I gotta say, man,
this is...
182
00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:38,910
this is pretty lame.
183
00:07:40,370 --> 00:07:41,620
What?
184
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:45,130
[SIGHS] Well...
look at us.
185
00:07:45,170 --> 00:07:47,170
It's Saturday night.
186
00:07:47,210 --> 00:07:48,380
Our wives
are out of town
187
00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:50,090
and this is the best
we come up with?
188
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:52,380
You want me
to go home?
189
00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:56,010
No! No. Let's just--
190
00:07:56,050 --> 00:07:57,640
Let's shake it up
a little bit.
191
00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:00,180
All right. All right.
Well, you wanna get a pizza?
192
00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:01,890
No!
193
00:08:03,100 --> 00:08:05,560
Yes, I do, but not--
that's not the point.
194
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:07,900
[SIGHS]
195
00:08:08,730 --> 00:08:09,980
What?
196
00:08:10,030 --> 00:08:11,240
It's jus--[SIGHS]
197
00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,110
Before I was
with Carrie, I...
198
00:08:13,150 --> 00:08:14,530
I used--I did whatever
I wanted to do.
199
00:08:14,570 --> 00:08:16,410
You know? I was
like a wild bull.
200
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,540
Yeah, I can see that.
201
00:08:18,580 --> 00:08:19,950
Yeah.
202
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,710
Let's do that
tonight. Let's...
203
00:08:21,750 --> 00:08:23,120
Let's be wild bulls.
204
00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:25,420
All right! All right.
I can do wild bulls.
205
00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:27,460
What? What?
What do wild bulls do?
206
00:08:27,500 --> 00:08:29,460
Well...Carrie
doesn't like it
207
00:08:29,500 --> 00:08:30,920
when I make a mess,
but you can't tell
208
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,010
a bull not to make
a mess!
209
00:08:33,050 --> 00:08:34,720
Yeeeaaahhh!
210
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,220
Aah aah
aah aah ow!
211
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,100
We got any more Cheetos?
212
00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:46,100
No, I shouldn't
have done that.
213
00:08:54,530 --> 00:08:55,950
I don't understand
why you're making
214
00:08:55,990 --> 00:08:57,450
such a big deal
out of this.
215
00:08:57,490 --> 00:09:00,160
Dad, if it's not
such a big deal,
216
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,370
then why did mom
have you put "Simone"
on her tombstone?
217
00:09:03,410 --> 00:09:05,540
She never forgave me
for losing it.
218
00:09:05,580 --> 00:09:08,130
Even in death,
she was petty.
219
00:09:08,170 --> 00:09:09,210
You know what, Dad?
220
00:09:09,250 --> 00:09:11,050
I have put up
with your craziness
221
00:09:11,090 --> 00:09:12,550
my whole life.
222
00:09:12,590 --> 00:09:15,010
You have ruined
relationships for me,
cost me jobs.
223
00:09:15,050 --> 00:09:16,970
You even spent
my college tuition
224
00:09:17,010 --> 00:09:18,430
on buying the rights
to the Lou Rawls story.
225
00:09:18,470 --> 00:09:20,560
That story needs to be
told and it will be!
226
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,520
Ohh...
227
00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:24,730
Darling...
it's just a name.
228
00:09:24,770 --> 00:09:27,730
Dad, it is not
just a name. Okay?
229
00:09:27,770 --> 00:09:31,150
It's important. It--
it defines who you are,
230
00:09:31,190 --> 00:09:33,030
how people treat you.
231
00:09:33,070 --> 00:09:35,700
I mean, if I'd
been Simone, then...
232
00:09:35,740 --> 00:09:37,660
maybe I would've had
a whole different,
233
00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:39,620
better life.
234
00:09:39,660 --> 00:09:41,450
But we'll never know,
will we?
235
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:44,200
The man drew a flush.
236
00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:51,210
Hey, the car show's
in town.
237
00:09:51,250 --> 00:09:53,130
Nah.
238
00:09:53,170 --> 00:09:55,420
Ooh! Stutterin' John's
in Rent.
239
00:09:57,050 --> 00:09:59,260
No, no, no, no.
240
00:09:59,300 --> 00:10:01,350
Hey, we could go see
that penguin movie.
241
00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:08,230
All right, well,
I mean, there's gotta be
242
00:10:08,270 --> 00:10:10,110
somethin' we can do.
243
00:10:10,730 --> 00:10:12,480
Check this out.
244
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,780
Why don't we party
with the beautiful people
245
00:10:13,820 --> 00:10:15,360
at the Lightning Lounge?
246
00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,070
Hey, hey, what was wrong
with Rock and Bowl?
247
00:10:17,110 --> 00:10:18,320
"Free shoe rental."
248
00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:20,320
Would--come on!
249
00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:22,620
Tonight's about takin'
our manhood back!
250
00:10:22,660 --> 00:10:24,120
I say we do
this club thing.
251
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:25,410
No, no. I don't know
about goin' to a club.
252
00:10:25,450 --> 00:10:27,710
Come on. I mean,
we--we're married men.
253
00:10:27,750 --> 00:10:29,710
We're not going there
to pick up women.
254
00:10:29,750 --> 00:10:31,080
This is a guys
night out, man!
255
00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:32,210
Come on,
we're wild bulls!
256
00:10:32,250 --> 00:10:33,170
Now, let's do this.
257
00:10:33,210 --> 00:10:35,130
Wait, wait,
wait, wait.
258
00:10:35,170 --> 00:10:38,220
Are you gonna go like that?
You're wearin' sweats.
259
00:10:38,260 --> 00:10:42,220
Okay, first of all,
these are easy-fit pants.
260
00:10:42,260 --> 00:10:44,470
And you should talk.
You look like Bob Vila.
261
00:10:51,810 --> 00:10:54,690
* I'm too sexyfor my shirt*
262
00:10:54,730 --> 00:10:56,610
* Too sexy for my shirt*
263
00:10:56,650 --> 00:10:59,610
* So sexy it hurts*
264
00:10:59,650 --> 00:11:02,780
* And I'm too sexyfor my car*
265
00:11:02,820 --> 00:11:04,200
* Too sexy for my car*
266
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:07,870
* Too sexy by far*
267
00:11:07,910 --> 00:11:10,710
* I'm too sexy for my hat*
268
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:12,880
* Too sexy for my hat*
269
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,800
* Too sexy for my hat*
270
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:18,840
* I'm a model,you know what I mean*
271
00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:22,800
* And I do my little turnon the catwalk*
272
00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:26,720
* Yeah, on the catwalk,on the catwalk, yeah*
273
00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:29,850
* I shake my little tushon the catwalk...*
274
00:11:29,890 --> 00:11:31,440
Maybe I should
just go home.
275
00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:35,360
[**]
276
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:47,160
[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]
277
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,330
-Simone, turn around!
-Simone!
278
00:11:49,370 --> 00:11:52,870
-Yes! Simone!
-I love you, Simone!
279
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:54,290
Over here!
280
00:11:54,330 --> 00:11:55,420
We love you, Simone!
281
00:11:55,460 --> 00:11:56,800
Simone!
282
00:11:58,170 --> 00:11:59,420
We love you!
283
00:11:59,460 --> 00:12:02,260
Oh, and I love you.
[CHUCKLES]
284
00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,390
Where to, Miss Simone?
285
00:12:06,430 --> 00:12:09,430
Uh...I guess
Brad and Angelina's.
286
00:12:09,470 --> 00:12:10,890
But I'm not singing.
287
00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:12,730
Very good.
288
00:12:12,770 --> 00:12:14,230
You know, I may be
a tad out of line
289
00:12:14,270 --> 00:12:16,610
saying this, but
you look absolutely--
290
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,820
Hey, whoa, Doug, Doug,
wait a minute, wait a minute.
291
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:27,830
-I just thought of somethin'.
-What's up?
292
00:12:27,870 --> 00:12:29,160
We look pretty good
here, right?
293
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:30,790
-We look great.
-Exactly.
294
00:12:30,830 --> 00:12:33,670
And we're successful.
We smell good.
295
00:12:33,710 --> 00:12:35,540
Even though
we'renot interested,
296
00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,670
there's a good chance that
some of these ladies...
297
00:12:37,710 --> 00:12:39,880
are gonna throw
themselves at us.
298
00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:41,920
Oh my God,
I never thought of that.
299
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:43,680
Yeah.
300
00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:45,930
You know what? We should come up
with some kind of code word.
301
00:12:45,970 --> 00:12:47,260
For what?
302
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:48,640
In case things
get out of hand.
303
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:50,640
Oh. You--oh,
you mean like if...
304
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:51,890
this chick's all over me
or somethin' like that,
305
00:12:51,930 --> 00:12:53,770
and I need you
to bail me out?
306
00:12:53,810 --> 00:12:54,940
-I just say the code word?
-Exactly. Exactly.
307
00:12:54,980 --> 00:12:56,020
-Okay.
-Okay. What do you want
308
00:12:56,060 --> 00:12:57,690
the code word to be?
309
00:12:57,730 --> 00:12:59,230
How about
"Kettle corn"?
310
00:13:00,940 --> 00:13:02,030
Kettle corn?
311
00:13:02,070 --> 00:13:03,190
Yeah. What's wrong
with kettle corn?
312
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:04,950
Well, it's just--
it's not organic.
313
00:13:04,990 --> 00:13:07,120
It doesn't come up
in a sentence very often.
314
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,240
It does for me.
315
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:11,200
People, you cannot
stand here.
316
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:12,580
Please move inside.
317
00:13:13,910 --> 00:13:15,120
Let's do this.
318
00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:17,000
Wild bulls.
319
00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:21,050
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
320
00:13:35,770 --> 00:13:37,850
-Yes.
-Yeah.
321
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,810
[CHUCKLES]
322
00:13:39,860 --> 00:13:43,110
-[CLEARS THROAT] Hello.
-Ooh. Hello.
323
00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:47,030
-It's "Kettle corn"--
-Yeah, it's "Kettle corn."
324
00:13:47,070 --> 00:13:48,320
Okay. Right.
325
00:13:56,460 --> 00:13:57,750
What are you doin'?
326
00:13:57,790 --> 00:14:00,250
ARTHUR: I'm goin' out.
327
00:14:00,290 --> 00:14:02,250
It's 2:00 in the morning.
Where are you goin'?
328
00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:03,380
To Uncle Chester's.
329
00:14:03,420 --> 00:14:05,720
To win your name back.
330
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:07,430
Come on.
That's crazy.
331
00:14:07,470 --> 00:14:09,180
You're happy
with your life?
332
00:14:09,220 --> 00:14:10,760
Schlepping coffee
for suits by day
333
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:12,930
and folding giant
underwear by night?
334
00:14:16,230 --> 00:14:17,690
'Cause as long
as you're Carrie,
335
00:14:17,730 --> 00:14:18,940
that's all
you're gonna get.
336
00:14:18,980 --> 00:14:20,940
Dad, come on.
Just go back to bed.
337
00:14:20,980 --> 00:14:22,320
You were right.
338
00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:25,440
As Simone, you could've
had a better life.
339
00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,030
You could've been
an astronaut or a...
340
00:14:27,070 --> 00:14:29,660
-an inventor.
-Or a movie star?
341
00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:30,740
Yes.
342
00:14:30,780 --> 00:14:32,080
I'll call you a cab.
343
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,870
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
344
00:14:35,910 --> 00:14:38,040
[SLURPING DRINK
THROUGH STRAW]
345
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,960
Ahh...
346
00:14:47,050 --> 00:14:49,180
We didn't really
need a code word, huh?
347
00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:51,930
Yeah, that's surprising.
348
00:14:51,970 --> 00:14:53,300
Usually the sound
of a guy suckin' ice
349
00:14:53,350 --> 00:14:55,140
drives women wild.
350
00:14:55,180 --> 00:14:57,230
Hey, I paid 15 bucks
for this drink. Okay?
351
00:14:57,270 --> 00:15:00,230
If I want to eat
the glass, I'll do that.
352
00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:01,980
And you with your
up-nods and smilin'.
353
00:15:02,020 --> 00:15:03,400
Like that was workin'.
"Hey, everybody,
354
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:05,440
look at me." Look at
my receding gums.
355
00:15:05,480 --> 00:15:08,400
"Hey, horse teeth.
Horse teeth. Horse teeth.
356
00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:09,990
Big choppers."
357
00:15:11,320 --> 00:15:13,370
-[SLURPING]
-Yeah, well...
358
00:15:13,410 --> 00:15:14,700
[SLURPING]
359
00:15:14,740 --> 00:15:16,330
I'm sure nobody
saw my mouth,
360
00:15:16,370 --> 00:15:18,330
because luckily,
I'm sittin' next to a guy
361
00:15:18,370 --> 00:15:19,710
who looks like
he ate the guy
362
00:15:19,750 --> 00:15:21,420
sittin' next to him.
363
00:15:21,460 --> 00:15:22,830
Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
364
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,290
[SLURPING]
365
00:15:25,420 --> 00:15:26,760
Let me tell you
somethin', man.
366
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,300
If I was single,
I would stomp you
367
00:15:28,340 --> 00:15:29,720
-in the chick department.
-Ohh...
368
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,340
Right. What do you--
you--you think
369
00:15:31,380 --> 00:15:32,760
you got more game
than me? Really?
370
00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,300
-I know I do.
-Oh, yeah.
371
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:35,850
-That's funny.
-That isfunny.
372
00:15:35,890 --> 00:15:37,350
Yeah. All right.
373
00:15:37,390 --> 00:15:38,850
[SLURPING]
374
00:15:38,890 --> 00:15:40,810
How about a--
a little wager?
375
00:15:40,850 --> 00:15:41,940
I'm in.
376
00:15:41,980 --> 00:15:43,270
Okay. All right.
377
00:15:43,310 --> 00:15:44,810
All right,
how about this? $100,
378
00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:47,150
first one who get somebody
to dance with him.
379
00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:48,900
[SNICKERS]
Literally the easiest
hundred bucks
380
00:15:48,940 --> 00:15:51,070
-I've ever made in my life.
-Yeah? All right.
381
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:53,450
-[CLEARS THROAT]
-Okay.
382
00:15:53,490 --> 00:15:55,780
Excuse me.
You, uh...
383
00:15:55,830 --> 00:15:56,790
Would you like
to dance?
384
00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:58,370
No, thanks.
385
00:15:58,410 --> 00:15:59,790
How about you?
386
00:15:59,830 --> 00:16:00,870
You?
387
00:16:00,910 --> 00:16:02,210
You.
388
00:16:04,540 --> 00:16:05,840
Hi. Excuse me for
a second. Would--
389
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:06,840
No.
390
00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:08,130
Would--
391
00:16:08,170 --> 00:16:09,380
You don't even know
what I was gonna say.
392
00:16:09,420 --> 00:16:12,090
I have money
and I'm dying. Okay?
393
00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:16,760
Oh, my God!
This is totally my song!
394
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:18,770
Oh, my God.
It's totally my song, too.
395
00:16:18,810 --> 00:16:20,390
You wanna dance?
396
00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:21,430
[CLEARS THROAT]
You're up now.
397
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,560
I'm on deck.
398
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:24,020
[CHUCKLES]
399
00:16:24,060 --> 00:16:26,110
She's great.
She's so great. She--
400
00:16:26,150 --> 00:16:27,360
Excuse me.
401
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:28,570
Do you know where
the bathroom is?
402
00:16:28,610 --> 00:16:29,980
Yeah. Yeah, I do.
403
00:16:30,030 --> 00:16:31,400
It's right up there
to the right. Yeah.
404
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:32,950
Yeah. It's over this way.
I'll show you. Yeah.
405
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:47,920
Pay up, man.
Pay up.
406
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:49,130
-All right.
-Pay up.
407
00:16:49,170 --> 00:16:50,380
First of all,
does she even know
408
00:16:50,420 --> 00:16:51,460
-she's dancin' with you?
-Oh,
409
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:52,550
I think
she knows.
410
00:16:52,590 --> 00:16:53,970
-Yeah.
-Okay?
411
00:16:54,010 --> 00:16:55,180
She's makin' out
with that guy.
412
00:16:56,300 --> 00:16:57,550
It's 'cause
I told her to.
413
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,390
It turns me on. Okay?
414
00:16:59,430 --> 00:17:01,060
All right, look,
here's the rule.
415
00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:03,100
It's gotta be someone
who's not already dancing,
416
00:17:03,140 --> 00:17:06,150
someone starting
from a standing
or neutral position.
417
00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:07,980
-Let's do it.
-All right. Let's go.
418
00:17:08,020 --> 00:17:09,320
All right.
419
00:17:13,150 --> 00:17:14,320
Oh, yeah.
420
00:17:18,450 --> 00:17:20,040
Will you dance with me
really--really quick?
421
00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,120
Oh, no, thanks.
422
00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:22,040
How about I give you
50 bucks?
423
00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:24,040
-What?
-Yeah.
424
00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:25,210
-MAN: What's goin' on here?
-No, no, no. Nothin', nothin'.
425
00:17:25,250 --> 00:17:26,290
I just wanted her
to dance with me
426
00:17:26,330 --> 00:17:27,290
just for one second.
427
00:17:27,330 --> 00:17:29,210
He said he'd
give me $50.
428
00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:30,630
You think
she's a hooker?
429
00:17:30,670 --> 00:17:32,050
Wha--no! No, no, no.
All right, look.
430
00:17:32,090 --> 00:17:33,720
Forget about that.
Forget about it.
431
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,090
How about
I give you50 bucks,
youdance with me?
432
00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:37,640
How about I kick
your ass, old man?
433
00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:40,140
Kettle corn!
434
00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:48,230
So?
435
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,150
You know what?
It's okay, Dad.
436
00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,990
You tried. That's
the important thing.
437
00:17:58,030 --> 00:17:59,620
Besides, you know,
I like my life.
438
00:17:59,660 --> 00:18:01,580
Have a great husband...
439
00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:03,500
crazy dad
who loves me.
440
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:04,580
Hmm.
441
00:18:04,620 --> 00:18:06,460
I like being Carrie.
442
00:18:07,540 --> 00:18:08,880
About that...
443
00:18:11,380 --> 00:18:13,380
Oh, my God.
444
00:18:13,420 --> 00:18:15,550
Did you lose
the name "Carrie"?!
445
00:18:15,590 --> 00:18:17,340
I prefer to think of it
446
00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:19,890
as winning you
the name "Midge."
447
00:18:23,350 --> 00:18:24,640
Hey, I kettle-corned
you, man!
448
00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:26,180
Excuse me. Raven
and I are waiting
449
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:27,890
for a song to dance to.
450
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,560
Hey, you stupid idiot.
Will you help me out?
451
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:30,560
This guy's gonna kill me.
452
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,110
What are you
talking about?
453
00:18:32,150 --> 00:18:33,940
I hit
on his girlfriend...
454
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:35,530
and then
kinda on him.
455
00:18:37,070 --> 00:18:39,030
So give him a little attitude.
He'll back right down.
456
00:18:39,070 --> 00:18:40,660
-Whassup, man?
-Get down! Stop it!
457
00:18:40,700 --> 00:18:41,780
You're
makin' it worse!
458
00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:43,450
Youstop, man.
There's 2 of us,
459
00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:44,580
there's one of him.
What do you want to do,
460
00:18:44,620 --> 00:18:45,620
run out of here
like little girls?
461
00:18:45,660 --> 00:18:46,910
Crawl out
the bathroom window?
462
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,290
Yeah! That--yes!
The bathroom!
463
00:18:48,330 --> 00:18:50,040
Would you stop it?
464
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:51,250
Come on, now, man!
465
00:18:51,290 --> 00:18:53,500
You're a wild bull,
right?
466
00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:55,920
I'm 45
and I'm trembling.
467
00:18:57,130 --> 00:18:58,470
No. Come on, man.
468
00:18:58,510 --> 00:18:59,970
We're wild bulls.
You're a wild bull!
469
00:19:00,010 --> 00:19:01,430
-Yeah.
-Right?
470
00:19:01,470 --> 00:19:02,550
Yeah. I'm a wild bull.
Wild bull.
471
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:03,970
Right! Now, gimme
some crazy eyes.
472
00:19:04,010 --> 00:19:05,270
Yeah.
473
00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:15,650
That karate's
something else, huh?
474
00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:18,650
Yeah. It's bad news.
475
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:20,110
RAY: Yeah.
476
00:19:21,110 --> 00:19:22,700
Did you find
your tooth?
477
00:19:26,790 --> 00:19:28,460
They told me they'd call.
478
00:19:29,660 --> 00:19:32,000
What do you think
that guy was on parole for?
479
00:19:33,250 --> 00:19:34,210
Whatever it was,
he's gotta add
480
00:19:34,250 --> 00:19:36,130
sexual assault now.
481
00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,360
So the code word's
"Fiddle-faddle," right?
482
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:02,490
-"Fiddle-faddle."
-Right.
483
00:20:10,870 --> 00:20:13,460
[**]
33608
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