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1
00:00:01,635 --> 00:00:03,637
[instrumental music]
2
00:00:03,670 --> 00:00:06,507
Breakfast is served.
3
00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:10,443
Yeah.
See, this is a breakfast.
4
00:00:10,476 --> 00:00:11,612
That's a damn shame.
5
00:00:13,814 --> 00:00:15,215
What, are you teachers
protesting
6
00:00:15,248 --> 00:00:17,350
a new Play‐Doh tax
or somethin'?
7
00:00:17,383 --> 00:00:19,520
No, I'm tryin'
the new fist diet
8
00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:20,721
to get in shape
for the wedding.
9
00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:22,255
See, I can eat
anything I want
10
00:00:22,288 --> 00:00:24,190
as long as the portions
are smaller than a fist.
11
00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:26,593
Mm‐hmm. Well, then you might
wanna use Shaq's fist.
12
00:00:28,294 --> 00:00:29,495
'Cause you're gonna
starve to death
13
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,598
tryin' to use your
little Mini‐Me hands.
14
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,333
Stop it.
15
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:36,603
As long as I am buried in
a wedding dress that fits.
16
00:00:36,637 --> 00:00:39,372
So are you excited about
going back to "Mr. L. A.?"
17
00:00:39,405 --> 00:00:42,709
Hell, yeah. Me and Dirk
back in action again, baby!
18
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:44,578
Hey, did Dirk fire
that replacement?
19
00:00:44,611 --> 00:00:47,313
‐ Oh, he's already gone.
‐ Ooh, how he take it?
20
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:49,415
I mean, he took it pretty well,
but of course
21
00:00:49,449 --> 00:00:51,217
there was those
unexplained bomb threats
22
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:53,687
from an anonymous man cryin'.
23
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:57,157
Talking about,
"Why y'all fire me?
24
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,494
I'm gonna blow
this joint up."
25
00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:03,329
[screaming and wailing]
26
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:07,133
♪ Often I wish that we ♪
27
00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:09,435
♪ Could take the time to see ♪
28
00:01:09,469 --> 00:01:14,174
♪ The need there is
to be a family yeah ♪
29
00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:16,442
♪ 'Cause it's All Of Us ♪
30
00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:18,879
♪ Sometimes it can be rough ♪
31
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:23,483
♪ Time and seasons change
but we will still remain ♪
32
00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:25,886
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪
33
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:28,354
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪
34
00:01:28,388 --> 00:01:31,391
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪
35
00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:34,360
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪♪♪
36
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:40,534
[upbeat music]
37
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:43,870
Ladies and gentlemen,
your attention, please.
38
00:01:43,904 --> 00:01:46,206
Making his triumphant
return to the ring
39
00:01:46,239 --> 00:01:48,374
after a two‐month hiatus.
40
00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:51,712
I give you, Robert, Mr. L. A.
41
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:52,779
James.
42
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:55,181
[all cheering]
43
00:01:56,249 --> 00:01:57,518
Whoo‐hoo‐hoo!
44
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:58,685
Yeah!
45
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,856
Float like a butterfly,
sting like a bee
46
00:02:02,889 --> 00:02:06,392
man, it feels good
to be back on local TV!
47
00:02:06,426 --> 00:02:07,460
I missed y'all.
48
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,231
What's up baby?
Let's get it poppi‐‐
49
00:02:11,264 --> 00:02:12,766
‐ Let's go, let's go.
‐ Mr. James..
50
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:15,368
I am such a big
fan of your show.
51
00:02:15,401 --> 00:02:16,703
Oh, that's cute.
52
00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:19,573
It's always nice to have
a young fan, but listen
53
00:02:19,606 --> 00:02:22,509
dream big, and stay
in school, alright?
54
00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:25,378
Dirk, what's this I hear about
this new program director?
55
00:02:25,411 --> 00:02:26,446
That's the rumor.
56
00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:27,514
The station manager hired one
57
00:02:27,548 --> 00:02:28,882
after the ratings fell.
58
00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:31,451
Hi, guys.
I'm Corky.
59
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:34,220
And you should tell the world.
60
00:02:34,254 --> 00:02:35,321
Start with that guy over there.
61
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:39,192
Yo, so what's up
with this new guy?
62
00:02:39,225 --> 00:02:40,493
I heard it's a chick.
63
00:02:40,527 --> 00:02:42,262
A chick?
64
00:02:42,295 --> 00:02:43,764
I wonder if she has
our sensibilities.
65
00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:45,298
I wonder if she's black.
66
00:02:45,331 --> 00:02:47,901
Well, the wondering's over,
boys.
67
00:02:47,934 --> 00:02:49,803
Hi, I'm Corky Haras.
68
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:52,305
Your new, non‐black, non‐male
69
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,741
sensibility‐getting
program director.
70
00:03:02,315 --> 00:03:04,350
We're getting "Punk'd", right?
71
00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:06,920
Now, I want to hear
all of your ideas.
72
00:03:06,953 --> 00:03:09,690
I'm a listener. How do you think
I got where I am today?
73
00:03:09,723 --> 00:03:11,424
Your parents
gave you a ride?
74
00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,729
Actually, I sort of did
some programming
75
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,397
for this little cable channel.
76
00:03:17,430 --> 00:03:19,299
Um, what was
the name of it again?
77
00:03:19,332 --> 00:03:20,967
Oh, yeah, MTV.
78
00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:22,002
[chuckles]
79
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:23,737
Listen, calling in to TRL
80
00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:26,907
for Hoobastank videos
doesn't count as programming.
81
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,909
I do love Hoobastank.
82
00:03:28,942 --> 00:03:31,411
Almost as much as I love
tripling the gross revenue
83
00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:33,880
of MTV and all
of its subsidiaries
84
00:03:33,914 --> 00:03:35,448
over the last fiscal year.
85
00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,785
Yeah, well, that sounds
all fine and dandy
86
00:03:38,819 --> 00:03:40,787
but we're fine here
at "Mr. L. A."
87
00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:42,455
Oh, well, actually,
that's what
88
00:03:42,488 --> 00:03:43,924
your last programming
director thought
89
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:46,292
and well, where is he now?
90
00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:51,565
Oh, gosh, I guess you're
just here all alone.
91
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:53,900
Oh, wait, no, you're not!
92
00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:55,401
You're here with me!
93
00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:59,506
Get used to it, hmm?
94
00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:00,641
Okay.
95
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:09,616
Tia, I don't know
about this diet.
96
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:11,384
It makes us feel bad.
97
00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:13,019
Well, Jonelle,
you don't seem sick.
98
00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:14,555
I'm not.
99
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:17,791
I just feel bad
'cause you feel bad.
100
00:04:17,824 --> 00:04:21,361
And I also feel bad because..
101
00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:23,329
...I ate a pork chop
between classes.
102
00:04:24,531 --> 00:04:26,967
‐ Cheater!
‐ I know.
103
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,635
I'm going to repent.
104
00:04:28,669 --> 00:04:30,671
Uh, in the kitchen?
105
00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:32,673
Girl, it's my process,
let it be.
106
00:04:34,474 --> 00:04:37,944
Hmm, baby, you look terrible.
107
00:04:37,978 --> 00:04:40,013
Why're you doing
this to yourself?
108
00:04:40,046 --> 00:04:43,884
I already told you I love you
just the way you are. Alright?
109
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:48,021
Even if you gain a little bit
of weight, I can roll with you.
110
00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:50,524
Just as long as you
don't roll on me.
111
00:04:53,594 --> 00:04:54,995
[sighing]
Hey, y'all.
112
00:04:59,700 --> 00:05:01,535
Uh, Jonelle..
113
00:05:01,568 --> 00:05:03,770
...did you eat the powdered
doughnuts out the kitchen?
114
00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:04,605
Tia.
115
00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:11,044
I am so offended
by your allegation.
116
00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:13,379
I mean, what, is my integrity
gonna be questioned
117
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:16,116
through the duration
of this diet?
118
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:18,552
Uh, Jonelle, you have
a little bit
119
00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:20,887
of integrity on your nose
and your upper lip.
120
00:05:23,957 --> 00:05:25,959
Maybe you need to dust
the kitchen a little better.
121
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:26,993
Okay..
122
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:31,497
[phone ringing]
123
00:05:31,532 --> 00:05:32,933
(Rusty)
'Hey, Neesee, the phone!'
124
00:05:32,966 --> 00:05:35,368
[phone ringing]
125
00:05:35,401 --> 00:05:37,704
Hey, you want me to get it?
126
00:05:37,738 --> 00:05:40,473
(Neesee)
'You've reached Neesee
and Bobby James.'
127
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:41,775
(Bobby)
'Leave a message.'
128
00:05:41,808 --> 00:05:43,476
(Neesee and Bobby)
'Peace.'
129
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:46,412
(John)
'What up, Neesee James?
This is John.'
130
00:05:49,015 --> 00:05:50,416
What you calling to say?
131
00:05:50,450 --> 00:05:53,053
'I'm just callin' to say
it was wonderful'
132
00:05:53,086 --> 00:05:55,622
'meeting you the other night.'
133
00:05:55,656 --> 00:05:58,992
'I am still thinkin' about
that beautiful smile'
134
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,694
'and I look forward
to seein' it again.'
135
00:06:00,727 --> 00:06:02,596
I don't think so, John.
136
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,568
‐ Hey, you ready?
‐ Yeah, yeah.
137
00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:08,669
About as ready as I'll ever be.
138
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,873
You know, when you were back
in the back, your phone rang
139
00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:15,609
and some dude named John
left a message on your machine.
140
00:06:15,642 --> 00:06:17,578
Oh, okay. I'll check it
when I get back.
141
00:06:17,611 --> 00:06:18,612
Okay.
142
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:21,014
So who's John?
143
00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:26,052
‐ The Baptist.
‐ He didn't say.
144
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,954
But he did say he was looking
forward to hooking up with you.
145
00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:30,957
Okay. Thanks.
146
00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:35,562
So who is he?
147
00:06:37,598 --> 00:06:40,000
Oh, uh, he's this guy
148
00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:43,570
that lives at 1600,
Mind‐your‐business Blvd.
149
00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:47,173
‐ Oh, my mistake. My mistake.
‐ Okay
150
00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:49,843
See, because, uh, I was
thinking that at this point
151
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:51,578
in our relationship,
he'll live at
152
00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:54,114
1500 It's‐kinda
‐my‐business‐lane.
153
00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,451
Oh, well, see, you
need MapQuest.
154
00:06:58,484 --> 00:07:00,721
Because you're headed
in the wrong direction.
155
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:06,459
Okay, if that's the way it is.
156
00:07:06,492 --> 00:07:09,696
Well, if you want to know,
it's a guy that's interested
157
00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:12,465
in me catering
his function for him.
158
00:07:12,498 --> 00:07:14,100
‐ See?
‐ Mm‐hmm.
159
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,069
I am so glad we got
that straightened out.
160
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:20,073
Mm‐hmm. But, uh, what if it was
a guy that I was dating?
161
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,107
Would that make a difference?
162
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,109
Shouldn't it?
163
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:24,745
I don't think so.
164
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:25,912
I think you should be
able to do you
165
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:27,648
and I should be able to do me.
166
00:07:29,716 --> 00:07:32,085
Cool?
167
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,587
Cool.
168
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:36,156
Now why don't we go eat?
Because I am starving.
169
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:37,691
Great. Where we going?
170
00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:39,125
Oh, this nice little place
at the intersection
171
00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:42,195
of I‐ain't‐tellin'‐and‐you'll
‐see‐when‐we‐get‐there.
172
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,502
Okay, check this out.
173
00:07:48,535 --> 00:07:50,136
What we need to do is,
we need to hit the public
174
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:51,872
with tons of promotions.
175
00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:55,509
I'm talkin' about TV spots,
radio spots, billboards.
176
00:07:55,542 --> 00:07:57,944
Listen, we do new
opening titles for the show
177
00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,245
redress the "Mr. L. A." set.
178
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:01,014
Make it pop,
you know what I'm sayin'?
179
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:04,851
Yo, we book only A‐level talent,
"Mr. L. A." is back.
180
00:08:04,885 --> 00:08:07,554
Don't forget, we can also dress
guys up like chickens
181
00:08:07,588 --> 00:08:09,055
to hand out fliers.
182
00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:12,192
I still have my suit.
183
00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:14,961
Corky?
184
00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:18,298
Right, I love it,
it all sounds very good, and hot
185
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,934
but um, here's what
I'm thinking..
186
00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:23,904
(male narrator)
And now, "Guy Chat."
187
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:26,540
Hi, welcome to "Guy Chat."
188
00:08:26,573 --> 00:08:31,077
A show where we discuss issues
by men for men and about men.
189
00:08:31,111 --> 00:08:33,614
Today our guest guy
is Damon Dash
190
00:08:33,647 --> 00:08:35,315
'CEO of Roc‐a‐Fella Records.'
191
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,750
[applause]
192
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:42,255
Our topic: Why can't men take
their wives' last names?
193
00:08:43,089 --> 00:08:44,157
I'm Guy Harry.
194
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,592
I'm Guy Bart.
195
00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:46,960
I'm Guy Vance.
196
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,602
I'm Guy Robert.
197
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:06,613
Once again...today's topic is
198
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:09,082
Should men take
their wives' last names?
199
00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:11,718
And for some reason,
it's a popular trend.
200
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,789
Which begs the question..
201
00:09:15,822 --> 00:09:18,191
How does this make us
feel as men?
202
00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:23,730
Damon, um,
what are your thoughts?
203
00:09:23,764 --> 00:09:25,599
I think you should do
whatever a woman says
204
00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:26,800
you know what I'm saying, B?
205
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:33,907
Well, well, a‐as a man,
it makes me feel stupid.
206
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:42,348
Oh, Robert, open your mind,
and your heart.
207
00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:45,218
Look, you'd expect a woman
to do the same thing for you.
208
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:47,120
Why not take hers?
209
00:09:47,153 --> 00:09:51,091
I know. I'm proud to call myself
Bart Washington Chung.
210
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:53,359
You go, brother‐in‐law.
211
00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:55,929
I'm just doing me.
212
00:09:57,197 --> 00:09:58,799
Hell, yeah.
213
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:00,100
‐ We need a revolution.
‐ 'Mm'
214
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:02,869
And this time,
it will be televised.
215
00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:07,708
So in case you're working,
remember to set those TiVos.
216
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,042
[all laughing]
217
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:13,213
Robert, you're getting married.
218
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:15,616
Uh, have you ever considered
taking your wife's last name?
219
00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:19,252
Hell, no.
220
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:24,257
See, Robert, what you need
to see is
221
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,760
that men and women
are the same.
222
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,295
There's only two letters
separating us.
223
00:10:29,329 --> 00:10:31,164
‐ Wo..
‐ Whoa!
224
00:10:31,197 --> 00:10:32,866
‐ Whoa.
‐ Whoa.
225
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:34,200
‐ Wow.
‐ That was deep.
226
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:38,271
Which brings us
to tomorrow's topic.
227
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:42,042
Bras, stilettos and thongs,
tools of lust
228
00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:43,977
or instruments
of oppression?
229
00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:50,316
Until then, this is
"Guy Chat"
230
00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:52,252
reminding you..
231
00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:55,922
(together)
To keep chatting, guy.
232
00:11:06,432 --> 00:11:08,134
[knocking on door]
233
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:18,378
Rusty.
What're you doin' here?
234
00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:19,813
Alright, Neesee,
I just have some things
235
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,114
I need to get off my chest.
236
00:11:23,950 --> 00:11:25,418
Girl, is that how you look
without makeup?
237
00:11:27,521 --> 00:11:29,756
This is my avocado mask.
238
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:32,292
And I can't talk, I just said it
and I don't wanna crack it.
239
00:11:32,325 --> 00:11:33,326
Okay, alright,
you know somethin'
240
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,028
just, uh, just sit down.
241
00:11:35,061 --> 00:11:37,030
Because I'll do all
the talking, alright?
242
00:11:37,063 --> 00:11:38,064
Now, um..
243
00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:39,432
[laughing]
244
00:11:39,465 --> 00:11:42,736
Girl, you remember
when we were talkin', and, um
245
00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:45,105
I said that I thought it was
cool if we dated other people?
246
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:46,406
[laughing]
247
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:48,942
Well, it's not.
248
00:11:50,811 --> 00:11:53,346
Rusty, I thought
we had an understanding.
249
00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:56,850
No, Neesee, I don't think
you're demanding.
250
00:11:56,883 --> 00:11:59,019
No, Rusty, I said
251
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:01,955
I thought
we had an under‐standing.
252
00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:04,124
Oh, o‐okay, well, see,
I‐I don't think so
253
00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:05,992
because I don't wanna date
other people, alright?
254
00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:08,061
Now, listen, I'm not trying
to get down on bended knee or..
255
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,934
...with a ring
or anything, but..
256
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,168
...I'm just saying
I think that we need
257
00:12:15,201 --> 00:12:17,938
to step this up a level or two.
258
00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:20,741
[sighing]
Look like I'm gonna have
to crack my mask.
259
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:23,243
[soft grunt]
260
00:12:26,279 --> 00:12:28,915
[sighing]
Uh, Rusty..
261
00:12:29,816 --> 00:12:30,917
I like you.
262
00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:34,354
Just..
263
00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:37,457
...the kind of relationship
you're talking about havin'
264
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:41,027
is somethin' I don't wanna
have right now.
265
00:12:41,061 --> 00:12:43,129
Then what do you wanna
have right now?
266
00:12:43,163 --> 00:12:46,432
I just wanna enjoy my life
and not complicate it.
267
00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:51,337
Well, I didn't think being
with me was a complication
268
00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:52,773
but I guess I was wrong.
269
00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:56,409
So how do we end this, Neesee?
270
00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:02,248
I think we just did.
271
00:13:07,854 --> 00:13:08,922
I'm sorry.
272
00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:21,802
‐ Goodbye, Neesee.
‐ Bye, Rusty.
273
00:13:30,877 --> 00:13:32,145
Ooh! Damn.
274
00:13:34,548 --> 00:13:38,018
[school bell rings]
275
00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:40,120
Well, I brought our lunch.
276
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,456
Uh, for you, tofu, and for me..
277
00:13:44,457 --> 00:13:46,159
...steamed tuna.
278
00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:49,963
Looks good.
279
00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:52,866
And satisfying.
280
00:13:52,899 --> 00:13:54,467
‐ I'm starvin'
‐ Oh, thank God!
281
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,503
You said it first, that's why
I had my little helper
282
00:13:56,537 --> 00:13:58,171
sweet‐talk the cafeteria lady.
283
00:13:58,204 --> 00:14:00,306
‐ Bobby?
‐ Okay.
284
00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:06,980
Miss Doris gave me
sloppy joes, pizza rolls
285
00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:08,982
tater tots, cheesy fries,
fruit cocktail
286
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:11,051
and something
she called grab bag.
287
00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:12,619
(Jonelle)
'Mm‐hmm.'
288
00:14:12,653 --> 00:14:15,589
Jonelle, you went through
all of this trouble for me?
289
00:14:15,622 --> 00:14:18,625
For us.
I was hoping you would crack.
290
00:14:18,659 --> 00:14:20,661
Thank you for delivering
the food, Bobby.
291
00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:23,864
[clears throat]
My tip?
292
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:27,467
You can take anything
off the cart.
293
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,869
I want the grab bag.
294
00:14:30,604 --> 00:14:33,406
‐ Hey, son.
‐ Hey, dad.
295
00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:36,042
Are these raisins or taco meat?
296
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:40,113
‐ Looks like both.
‐ Cool!
297
00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:43,049
[chuckles]
Hey, baby, I brought you these
to make you feel better.
298
00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:49,556
‐ Maybe I should fry them.
‐ Mm.
299
00:14:49,590 --> 00:14:51,525
I'm sorry, baby.
Those are beautiful.
300
00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:53,359
And by the way,
the doctor says I'm fine.
301
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:55,028
But what about you?
How was work today?
302
00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:56,963
[sighing]
It was horrible.
303
00:14:56,997 --> 00:15:00,466
Today we did a show about what
movies made men cry the most.
304
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:03,069
And ironically enough,
it was "Boys Don't Cry."
305
00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:05,405
Mm‐hmm, yep, that's so sad.
306
00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:08,341
Can you pass me
those chili fries?
307
00:15:08,374 --> 00:15:11,344
How did I go from hosting a show
to hosting a slumber party?
308
00:15:11,377 --> 00:15:12,613
So what you gonna do?
309
00:15:12,646 --> 00:15:14,981
What I always do,
keep on keeping on, baby.
310
00:15:15,015 --> 00:15:16,683
‐ Mm‐hmm.
‐ They can't break me.
311
00:15:16,717 --> 00:15:19,052
‐ I'm a professional.
‐ Mm‐hmm‐hmm.
312
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,522
I can handle
whatever they throw my way.
313
00:15:21,555 --> 00:15:24,958
Now a man can experience
the joys of breast‐feeding.
314
00:15:24,991 --> 00:15:29,530
A wonderment men have envied
since the beginning of time.
315
00:15:29,563 --> 00:15:32,198
‐ Bart?
‐ And as we all know..
316
00:15:32,232 --> 00:15:33,567
Breast is best.
317
00:15:36,402 --> 00:15:38,605
There are a million nipples
to choose from
318
00:15:38,639 --> 00:15:41,542
so when you do decide, uh,
stick to that nipple
319
00:15:41,575 --> 00:15:43,243
to avoid nipple confusion.
320
00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,546
[chuckles]
Chat it up, brother.
321
00:15:45,579 --> 00:15:46,947
‐ Chat it up.
‐ Chat it up.
322
00:15:47,681 --> 00:15:49,149
You know what?
323
00:15:51,752 --> 00:15:53,286
I can't take this anymore, man.
324
00:15:53,319 --> 00:15:56,590
Whatever happened to
just usin' a bottle?
325
00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:59,092
Okay, look,
calm down, alright?
326
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:01,261
[chuckles]
I mean, uh..
327
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:05,198
You‐you're getting a little,
pardon the phrase, testy.
328
00:16:05,231 --> 00:16:07,200
Uh, I think it's time
for a "Guy Chat" hug.
329
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:08,702
‐ What's a "Guy Chat" hug?
‐ Cool.
330
00:16:08,735 --> 00:16:10,436
I'll show you what
a "Guy Chat" hug is.
331
00:16:11,705 --> 00:16:14,307
[men shouting]
332
00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:15,676
[all laughing]
333
00:16:15,709 --> 00:16:19,245
‐ See? All better!
‐ All better!
334
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:21,314
[applauding]
And we're out!
335
00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:25,485
Of our damn minds.
What was that?
336
00:16:25,519 --> 00:16:28,555
The most painful two minutes
in the history of television.
337
00:16:28,589 --> 00:16:31,491
No. Look, you've just
broken new ground.
338
00:16:31,525 --> 00:16:33,226
Yeah, while digging
my own grave.
339
00:16:33,259 --> 00:16:35,095
Look, I know this isn't
the show that you guys
340
00:16:35,128 --> 00:16:37,263
are used to doing
but it is working.
341
00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:40,500
Our numbers are way up!
You guys rock!
342
00:16:40,534 --> 00:16:42,035
‐ The numbers are up?
‐ Yeah!
343
00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:43,704
Then that makes it all okay.
344
00:16:43,737 --> 00:16:46,472
Thank you, Corky,
for saving my career.
345
00:16:46,507 --> 00:16:48,174
Oh, it is a gift.
346
00:16:48,208 --> 00:16:49,475
[chuckling]
347
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:53,313
I can't do another one
of these shows, bro.
348
00:16:53,346 --> 00:16:54,380
Tell me about it.
349
00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:55,415
I don't have
the autonomy I need
350
00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:56,683
to make this show work.
351
00:16:56,717 --> 00:16:58,451
Every decision I make,
I've to run past her.
352
00:16:58,484 --> 00:17:00,420
This is what I hate
about television, man.
353
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,355
When somebody who doesn't
know our audience
354
00:17:02,388 --> 00:17:03,690
is tellin' us what to do
for our audien‐‐
355
00:17:03,724 --> 00:17:06,292
Hey, I agree with you,
but this isn't our call.
356
00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:08,294
If management wants, uh,
Summer Fun Barbie here
357
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:10,263
to run the show,
what can we do?
358
00:17:10,296 --> 00:17:12,265
Here's what I'm thinking
for tomorrow's show.
359
00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:15,636
‐ Should Men Wear Makeup?
‐ You know what?
360
00:17:15,669 --> 00:17:17,638
‐ I think that is a great topic.
‐ Yeah.
361
00:17:17,671 --> 00:17:20,607
For whoever the new show host
is gonna be, I'm out.
362
00:17:20,641 --> 00:17:21,775
‐ No.
‐ Me, too.
363
00:17:21,808 --> 00:17:23,510
No. Uh, you guys, please
364
00:17:23,544 --> 00:17:26,246
just talk to me. I‐I..
I'm a listener!
365
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,418
[laughing]
Yeah!
366
00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:35,556
Hey, Mr. L. A.
Oh, we saw the show.
367
00:17:35,589 --> 00:17:37,423
Do fries come with that shake?
368
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:43,530
‐ It's not funny, Neesee.
‐ Actually, it is.
369
00:17:45,265 --> 00:17:46,767
Well, I hope you guys
got a good laugh
370
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:49,703
'cause Dirk and I
left "Guy Chat."
371
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:52,539
Yeah. We told them, take them
breasts and stuff 'em!
372
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,810
Baby, this is the best
I felt in weeks.
373
00:17:56,843 --> 00:17:59,345
Well, sweetie, you know
I support you no matter what
374
00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:02,115
but are you sure quitting your
job's a good idea right now?
375
00:18:02,148 --> 00:18:05,318
Trust me, everything
is gonna be fine.
376
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:07,353
Wait, so you left "Mr. L. A."
377
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:08,655
and went to
"Entertainment Tonight"
378
00:18:08,689 --> 00:18:10,591
and then you left
"Entertainment Tonight"
379
00:18:10,624 --> 00:18:13,159
to go back to "Mr. L. A.,"
and then you left there?
380
00:18:14,628 --> 00:18:16,863
Wow. Do you need
a career counselor?
381
00:18:18,565 --> 00:18:20,767
Counselor?
Are we going to camp?
382
00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:23,570
[phone rings]
383
00:18:25,371 --> 00:18:26,607
Wow.
384
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:28,775
‐ Hello.
‐ What a day, huh?
385
00:18:28,809 --> 00:18:33,179
So Robert and Dirk quit,
Neesee broke up with Rusty
386
00:18:33,213 --> 00:18:34,480
Bobby got the grab bag!
387
00:18:37,350 --> 00:18:39,119
I wish I had news to report.
388
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:40,787
Let me see.
389
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,591
You're pregnant?
390
00:18:49,763 --> 00:18:51,765
Well, clearly,
I'm not topping that.
391
00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:58,304
Does this mean
we're not going to camp?
392
00:19:01,675 --> 00:19:04,210
[instrumental music]
393
00:19:16,422 --> 00:19:19,359
‐ Hi, Corky! How are ya?
‐ Hey, Corky! How's it going?
394
00:19:19,392 --> 00:19:21,895
‐ Damn.
‐ Delicious!
395
00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:23,797
Mm, mm, mm.
396
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:26,232
‐ I'd like to cork that Corky.
‐ Mm‐hm.
397
00:19:27,768 --> 00:19:29,570
So, what's up? We still
hitting the strip club?
398
00:19:29,603 --> 00:19:31,538
The Breast Western?
Hell, yeah.
399
00:19:31,572 --> 00:19:32,939
Alright!
400
00:19:32,973 --> 00:19:34,608
‐ Hey, I'm always down.
‐ Hm.
401
00:19:34,641 --> 00:19:35,909
'Cause you know what they say.
402
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:37,778
(together)
Breast is best!
403
00:19:37,811 --> 00:19:39,379
[all laughing]
404
00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:43,784
[theme music]
29584
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