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1
00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,178
No. Still dead.
2
00:03:20,390 --> 00:03:23,593
Well, gentlemen,
doesn't our young fellow look fantastic?
3
00:03:24,144 --> 00:03:25,887
Okay, down to business.
4
00:03:25,979 --> 00:03:27,521
Drugs.
5
00:03:27,606 --> 00:03:29,599
You got loads of them. Give us some.
6
00:03:29,692 --> 00:03:31,731
- What do you want?
- What have you got?
7
00:03:31,819 --> 00:03:34,061
God's, ups, downs, hash,
Black Moroccan, A's...
8
00:03:34,155 --> 00:03:36,194
...heroin, Charlie, speeds, acids.
9
00:03:36,324 --> 00:03:39,325
- I think I'll have a gram...
- And grass.
10
00:03:39,411 --> 00:03:40,988
I'll have a gram of cocaine.
11
00:03:41,079 --> 00:03:42,538
Get your hands off!
12
00:03:44,708 --> 00:03:45,953
Fuck.
13
00:03:49,380 --> 00:03:52,131
- Hello.
- What the fuck do you want?
14
00:03:52,884 --> 00:03:55,042
- Was that your boyfriend there?
- Yeah.
15
00:03:55,136 --> 00:03:57,591
- What is he like?
- He's an asshole.
16
00:03:57,680 --> 00:03:59,091
What do you care?
17
00:04:00,433 --> 00:04:02,842
What are you doing
for the rest of the night?
18
00:04:02,936 --> 00:04:04,347
What's it to you?
19
00:04:05,355 --> 00:04:08,476
Do you want to come back to my flat
for some coke and some sex?
20
00:04:11,487 --> 00:04:12,816
- Okay.
- Great.
21
00:04:20,497 --> 00:04:23,071
- Is that your car, lads?
- Are you joking?
22
00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:26,371
We wouldn't buy a car like that.
It's a fucking woman's car.
23
00:04:31,467 --> 00:04:34,385
What are you doing
hanging around the north side, Jonathan?
24
00:04:34,638 --> 00:04:36,465
You know, this and that.
25
00:04:36,557 --> 00:04:39,676
Bit of shopping. Seeing the sights.
Burying my father.
26
00:04:40,394 --> 00:04:43,764
- Really? He's dead?
- He's dead.
27
00:04:43,981 --> 00:04:47,315
- What did he die of?
- He drank himself to death.
28
00:04:48,527 --> 00:04:50,022
Are you heartbroken?
29
00:04:50,113 --> 00:04:52,817
You know,
I'm glad he finally got it together.
30
00:04:53,199 --> 00:04:57,031
So the doctor says to him,
"You've got to stop your drinking.
31
00:04:57,120 --> 00:05:00,157
"Your liver will fucking give in.
You know what I'm saying?"
32
00:05:00,249 --> 00:05:03,119
He goes home and he celebrates
with a bottle of Bushmills.
33
00:05:03,210 --> 00:05:05,701
- Some way to go!
- Are you taking the piss?
34
00:05:05,796 --> 00:05:08,916
- I never joke about death.
- You are taking the piss.
35
00:05:09,342 --> 00:05:10,671
Am I?
36
00:05:33,326 --> 00:05:35,403
Wait here. I'll be back in a second.
37
00:05:44,797 --> 00:05:48,582
- 'Morning.
- You're not as cute as your brother.
38
00:05:51,305 --> 00:05:52,585
Thanks.
39
00:05:54,850 --> 00:05:57,720
- It's a beautiful morning out there, Mikey.
- She's asleep.
40
00:06:02,608 --> 00:06:04,518
It was a great funeral, wasn't it?
41
00:06:07,447 --> 00:06:10,982
- What's the matter? Have you slept?
- Yeah, I went to bed early.
42
00:06:16,416 --> 00:06:18,741
I want the ashes.
I want to take them away.
43
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:22,792
- What are you talking about?
- I want the fucking urn thingy.
44
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,589
I want to take it home with me.
45
00:06:24,841 --> 00:06:27,712
What are you shitting on about? It's 5:00.
46
00:06:27,803 --> 00:06:29,547
Mikey, she's asleep. Come on.
47
00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:33,006
I'm not going to give you the urn, okay?
48
00:06:34,268 --> 00:06:39,014
Look. Why don't you get
a couple of hours sleep here...
49
00:06:39,107 --> 00:06:41,479
...and we'll all have breakfast then, okay?
50
00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:43,986
Do you have pancakes?
51
00:06:44,946 --> 00:06:47,153
Yes. I will make you some...
52
00:06:59,755 --> 00:07:03,088
- Is he going to be all right?
- Yeah, he'll be fine.
53
00:07:04,342 --> 00:07:07,712
He's been a lot better the last few months.
He'll be grand.
54
00:07:09,515 --> 00:07:10,843
Listen. I'm sorry.
55
00:07:11,517 --> 00:07:13,593
We'll see you. We're going for a spin.
56
00:07:56,275 --> 00:07:58,600
I'm going to have to ask you
to get out here.
57
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:00,315
What?
58
00:08:00,738 --> 00:08:03,822
I have to ask you to get out of the car.
I'm sorry.
59
00:08:04,283 --> 00:08:05,563
What are you talking about?
60
00:08:05,659 --> 00:08:08,945
I have to ask you to get out of the car now.
I'm sorry. Please.
61
00:08:10,206 --> 00:08:11,700
You're serious.
62
00:09:08,978 --> 00:09:10,722
If you want to kill yourself...
63
00:09:10,814 --> 00:09:13,649
... you can't go wrongif you drive a convertible car...
64
00:09:13,734 --> 00:09:15,893
... over a cliff at 50 miles an hour.
65
00:09:16,403 --> 00:09:17,897
That's a sure thing.
66
00:09:20,574 --> 00:09:22,282
I broke my baby finger.
67
00:09:23,619 --> 00:09:24,864
No seat belt.
68
00:09:25,789 --> 00:09:30,250
The police said if I had been wearingmy seat belt I would have broken my neck.
69
00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:46,136
Under the threat of a prison sentencefor the stolen car...
70
00:09:46,228 --> 00:09:48,849
... I opted for three monthsas an inpatient...
71
00:09:49,064 --> 00:09:51,187
... in a psychiatric hospital.
72
00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:03,823
The good thing about goinginto the madhouse now...
73
00:10:03,913 --> 00:10:07,199
... is that my stay would run right overthe Christmas season.
74
00:10:07,292 --> 00:10:10,210
For as long as I can remember,I wanted to spend Christmas...
75
00:10:10,295 --> 00:10:12,454
... in a suburban mental institution.
76
00:10:15,009 --> 00:10:17,714
The group session you'll be attending
is a small one.
77
00:10:17,804 --> 00:10:20,889
It's made up of four people
about the same age as yourself.
78
00:10:21,683 --> 00:10:26,345
Most of them have been with us
a month or so. They're doing quite well.
79
00:10:27,689 --> 00:10:31,189
I'm sure you'll all get on very well.
Here's your room.
80
00:10:44,666 --> 00:10:46,208
Well, I'll take it.
81
00:10:49,421 --> 00:10:53,040
There's a special room for patientscalled the recreation room.
82
00:10:53,259 --> 00:10:57,720
You've got your Velcro-tipped darts,cards, the telly...
83
00:10:58,223 --> 00:11:01,806
... and a kettle that stops boilingwhen the water is lukewarm...
84
00:11:01,893 --> 00:11:06,058
... so you can't kill yourselfby pouring boiling water on your head.
85
00:11:07,774 --> 00:11:09,435
Look at that animal.
86
00:11:12,864 --> 00:11:15,189
Yeah, he's nice.
87
00:11:16,118 --> 00:11:17,944
I had a cat once.
88
00:11:19,496 --> 00:11:23,495
But it got its head stuck in a tin of cat food
I'd left on the counter.
89
00:11:25,377 --> 00:11:29,457
It was stuck for 10 hours
by the time I'd come back.
90
00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:32,874
I'm sorry.
91
00:11:33,845 --> 00:11:35,921
Must have been horrible for him.
92
00:11:37,516 --> 00:11:39,638
All that time in the dark...
93
00:11:40,853 --> 00:11:45,645
...trying to breathe, bumping into walls.
94
00:11:48,319 --> 00:11:49,861
That's sad.
95
00:11:52,657 --> 00:11:54,484
But he's okay now.
96
00:11:55,660 --> 00:11:58,661
Just a little edgy, but he's fine.
97
00:12:01,542 --> 00:12:03,749
Okay. I'll see you later.
98
00:12:12,095 --> 00:12:13,470
What's that for, lads?
99
00:12:19,562 --> 00:12:20,890
Thanks.
100
00:12:39,208 --> 00:12:40,916
You don't feel like talking?
101
00:12:43,546 --> 00:12:44,578
Okay.
102
00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:49,044
We'll leave it for today.
103
00:12:51,054 --> 00:12:55,931
My therapy sessions are at 12:00
every Tuesday and Thursday in Room 13.
104
00:12:57,645 --> 00:12:59,602
You're required to attend.
105
00:13:04,653 --> 00:13:07,226
I've been through your file this morning.
106
00:13:09,491 --> 00:13:11,199
I'm sorry about your father.
107
00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:08,345
You're woken at 7:30 sharp.A good hour after you got to sleep.
108
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:13,017
Excuse me. Why are you dressed like that?
109
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:16,011
- What?
- Why are you dressed like that?
110
00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:17,929
What are you talking about?
111
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:21,524
You're an inpatient, aren't you?
No civvies. P.J. s only.
112
00:14:31,289 --> 00:14:32,664
I'll have your clothes.
113
00:14:33,332 --> 00:14:36,784
There is nothing as comfortableas wearing secondhand pajamas...
114
00:14:36,878 --> 00:14:39,963
... that previously belongedto a very short person.
115
00:14:56,482 --> 00:14:59,153
Excuse me.
Is this the way to Dr. Figure's office?
116
00:14:59,236 --> 00:15:02,439
You're in the right direction.
Head through those blue doors.
117
00:15:02,531 --> 00:15:05,615
He's at the end of the corridor
on the second floor. Goodbye.
118
00:15:07,036 --> 00:15:09,159
- Hello.
- Hello.
119
00:15:11,916 --> 00:15:13,459
Are you two patients here?
120
00:15:15,628 --> 00:15:19,330
- No. We're doctors.
- Okay. I'll see you.
121
00:15:22,094 --> 00:15:24,764
- I like your slippers.
- Thanks.
122
00:15:26,474 --> 00:15:27,719
Do they bite?
123
00:15:28,935 --> 00:15:32,683
I don't know. Why don't you put
your hand down there and find out?
124
00:15:33,565 --> 00:15:34,894
Well, they're nice.
125
00:15:37,152 --> 00:15:39,228
Do you want a game of pool sometime?
126
00:15:39,321 --> 00:15:41,360
- When?
- Whenever.
127
00:15:43,492 --> 00:15:45,652
- I don't play pool.
- I'll play you.
128
00:15:47,413 --> 00:15:50,498
Yeah? I was actually more interested...
129
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:53,253
...in having a game of pool
with the young lady here.
130
00:15:53,336 --> 00:15:56,373
- No offense.
- Fuck you.
131
00:16:00,177 --> 00:16:01,921
How about table tennis?
132
00:16:02,806 --> 00:16:05,131
Can I give you the telephone number
of my room?
133
00:16:06,017 --> 00:16:07,049
No.
134
00:16:16,153 --> 00:16:17,185
Come in.
135
00:16:21,075 --> 00:16:23,827
I want to talk
about the whole pajamas thing.
136
00:16:24,037 --> 00:16:25,199
What's the problem?
137
00:16:25,288 --> 00:16:28,871
The problem is I've been forced
to wear pajamas in the middle of the day.
138
00:16:28,959 --> 00:16:32,410
It's health board regulations,
to distinguish you from day patients.
139
00:16:32,588 --> 00:16:34,995
It's fucking ridiculous.
They took my clothes.
140
00:16:35,090 --> 00:16:37,333
They're too small. I look like an idiot.
141
00:16:38,427 --> 00:16:39,886
You look fine, Jonathan.
142
00:16:40,846 --> 00:16:42,257
Everyone is wearing them.
143
00:16:45,518 --> 00:16:47,844
We can look at these sheets in a moment.
144
00:16:48,062 --> 00:16:52,227
So, therapy sessions.Three times a week at 2:00.
145
00:16:52,317 --> 00:16:54,357
This must be the nutcase class, is it?
146
00:16:54,445 --> 00:16:56,686
Come in. Grab a seat.
We're getting started.
147
00:16:56,780 --> 00:16:59,106
Fantastic.
I haven't missed anything, have I?
148
00:16:59,409 --> 00:17:02,445
This is Jonathan Breech, everyone.
He's joining our group.
149
00:17:03,079 --> 00:17:05,653
So, why don't you all introduce yourselves?
150
00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:09,830
- Rachel.
- Toby.
151
00:17:11,089 --> 00:17:13,164
That's Leslie and...
152
00:17:14,550 --> 00:17:15,581
...Nick.
153
00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:19,886
- No, you haven't missed anything.
- Well, that's good news.
154
00:17:22,559 --> 00:17:27,137
Yeah, my name is Jonathan Breech,
and I'm 19 years of age.
155
00:17:27,230 --> 00:17:30,896
And I'm really looking forward
to the next few weeks...
156
00:17:30,985 --> 00:17:33,357
...to all I learn about everyone.
157
00:17:33,529 --> 00:17:36,946
But more importantly,
about myself and my own problems.
158
00:17:39,035 --> 00:17:40,862
Thanks. Next?
159
00:17:41,913 --> 00:17:46,457
We've all been together here as a group
for a few weeks now...
160
00:17:46,543 --> 00:17:49,081
...and we've been sharing
our thoughts, so...
161
00:17:50,048 --> 00:17:52,420
Let me just ask you
how you feel at the moment...
162
00:17:52,508 --> 00:17:57,005
...and whether there's anything
that you feel you want to tell us.
163
00:17:58,765 --> 00:17:59,963
She's cute.
164
00:18:01,851 --> 00:18:03,512
Do you have a boyfriend?
165
00:18:06,107 --> 00:18:07,518
That'll be a "no," then.
166
00:18:11,529 --> 00:18:15,278
Okay. Let's just look
at this list then, shall we?
167
00:18:15,826 --> 00:18:18,495
On your sheets,
you'll see a list of situations...
168
00:18:18,578 --> 00:18:22,077
...that some people find difficult,
things we're somewhat afraid of.
169
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:27,333
I don't know about you.
Doctor, I don't know about him.
170
00:18:28,255 --> 00:18:31,672
- It's okay, Nick. He's a patient.
- I wouldn't trust him.
171
00:18:33,011 --> 00:18:34,755
It's fine. Fine.
172
00:18:36,306 --> 00:18:39,591
What I want you to do
is to tick off any of these items here...
173
00:18:39,684 --> 00:18:41,428
...that particularly trouble you.
174
00:18:41,729 --> 00:18:42,760
Excuse me.
175
00:18:44,064 --> 00:18:46,390
Filling out forms really scares me.
176
00:18:48,444 --> 00:18:51,778
That's okay, Toby. You can just leave it.
It's not that important.
177
00:18:51,865 --> 00:18:53,987
No, I was joking.
178
00:18:54,826 --> 00:18:57,364
- You're funny.
- Thanks, Doctor.
179
00:18:59,748 --> 00:19:01,540
Actually, it was quite funny.
180
00:19:02,126 --> 00:19:04,451
All right. I'm out of here. See you.
181
00:19:05,504 --> 00:19:08,541
You're not going to help yourself
by running away, Jonathan.
182
00:19:10,677 --> 00:19:14,805
No, you know, you're right, Doctor, no.
183
00:19:15,558 --> 00:19:17,597
Why don't you show us how it's done?
184
00:19:17,684 --> 00:19:20,721
Tell us a bit about yourself.
What scares you?
185
00:19:22,231 --> 00:19:25,482
I want to know if there's anything
in particular that worries you.
186
00:19:25,568 --> 00:19:29,613
I'd be happy to go through it with you
sometime if you're really interested, but...
187
00:19:29,698 --> 00:19:33,031
...we're not here to talk about me.
You know what I mean?
188
00:19:33,118 --> 00:19:35,788
- Sounds like denial to me.
- No, it's not denial.
189
00:19:35,871 --> 00:19:38,244
- Now you sound angry.
- I'm not angry either.
190
00:19:38,332 --> 00:19:39,875
Sometimes it's good to be angry.
191
00:19:39,959 --> 00:19:43,044
I don't think it's
an appropriate conversation for the group.
192
00:19:43,129 --> 00:19:45,917
Fine. If you don't feel comfortable
talking about it.
193
00:19:46,049 --> 00:19:48,338
But I believe you said I was running away.
194
00:19:48,427 --> 00:19:51,878
Yes, and I think that's what
we should be addressing, if anything.
195
00:19:51,971 --> 00:19:55,092
You're trying to deflect
the whole discussion onto my problems.
196
00:19:55,184 --> 00:19:57,805
And now you sound paranoid,
like Nick there.
197
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:04,392
- What did you say about me?
- I said nothing. How did you hear that?
198
00:20:04,944 --> 00:20:06,403
I hear everything.
199
00:20:08,365 --> 00:20:11,034
Don't you be talking about me
behind my back.
200
00:20:11,785 --> 00:20:13,494
I have enough on my plate!
201
00:20:16,957 --> 00:20:21,121
This has been a wonderful session for me.
I've learned loads about everyone...
202
00:20:21,212 --> 00:20:23,999
...and I'm almost ready
for the outside world again.
203
00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:26,628
So, thanks, Doc. Same time tomorrow.
204
00:20:28,637 --> 00:20:29,716
I'll see you.
205
00:20:55,916 --> 00:20:58,325
You think I'm cute? You think I'm cute?
206
00:20:59,921 --> 00:21:02,044
- Don't call me cute.
- But you are cute.
207
00:21:02,174 --> 00:21:04,462
- You're cute.
- You think I'm cute now?
208
00:21:07,096 --> 00:21:11,260
What? You want to play?
Come on. Now you're fighting.
209
00:21:12,976 --> 00:21:14,554
You think you're so tough.
210
00:22:19,674 --> 00:22:21,252
Do you think I'm cute now?
211
00:22:27,266 --> 00:22:30,636
I have to go back to therapy.
I'll see you later.
212
00:22:43,325 --> 00:22:45,117
You like that Rachel one, do you?
213
00:22:46,913 --> 00:22:48,158
I don't know.
214
00:22:48,248 --> 00:22:49,873
She's beautiful, isn't she?
215
00:22:52,252 --> 00:22:55,253
She's very complicated.
Anyway, I'll see you around.
216
00:23:33,089 --> 00:23:36,457
- Does she play all the time?
- Pretty much.
217
00:23:37,761 --> 00:23:39,753
That's the thing about these places.
218
00:23:39,846 --> 00:23:43,843
You think you're doing something noble
by encouraging her to play the piano.
219
00:23:44,100 --> 00:23:48,145
When she doesn't end up getting better,
you stick her in front of it all day.
220
00:23:49,355 --> 00:23:52,606
Then you forget about her.
How long has she been here for?
221
00:23:53,152 --> 00:23:54,563
Two years.
222
00:23:55,237 --> 00:23:59,650
- Two years. The road to recovery?
- Some people just don't get better.
223
00:24:00,535 --> 00:24:02,444
That's very frank of you, Doctor.
224
00:24:02,537 --> 00:24:05,906
The board of directors won't be pleased
to hear you admitting that.
225
00:24:05,999 --> 00:24:08,407
And tell me,
do you see me getting any better?
226
00:24:11,839 --> 00:24:13,499
You're more talkative today.
227
00:24:13,591 --> 00:24:18,668
I'm just fucking bored with this place.
If we weren't mad to begin with...
228
00:24:21,891 --> 00:24:24,217
So what's troubling you, Jonathan?
229
00:24:24,310 --> 00:24:27,312
That's a real standard textbook question,
isn't it, Doc?
230
00:24:27,397 --> 00:24:29,854
- Is it?
- When you're a psychiatrist...
231
00:24:29,941 --> 00:24:33,525
...who wears corduroy pants
and that jumper and no tie...
232
00:24:33,613 --> 00:24:35,854
...and drives an old Saab. Is that yours?
233
00:24:35,948 --> 00:24:37,941
- Yeah.
- The old Saab.
234
00:24:38,535 --> 00:24:41,205
You expect something
a little more original than:
235
00:24:41,288 --> 00:24:43,327
"What's troubling you, Jonathan?"
236
00:24:43,749 --> 00:24:46,916
- Do you?
- I thought you'd be the laid-back...
237
00:24:47,003 --> 00:24:49,838
...social worker type
who'd offer me cigarettes.
238
00:24:50,464 --> 00:24:53,169
Because you're very laid-back.
Very Robin Williams.
239
00:24:53,551 --> 00:24:56,636
I thought that we'd be bonding
and hugging and stuff.
240
00:25:02,269 --> 00:25:05,852
- You want to talk about your father?
- You want to talk about yours?
241
00:25:07,566 --> 00:25:10,603
What would you do if you were allowed
home for the afternoon?
242
00:25:10,694 --> 00:25:14,645
Get a decent cup of coffee,
then chop my head off with a chain saw.
243
00:25:16,118 --> 00:25:17,149
Okay.
244
00:25:20,498 --> 00:25:22,953
Just one thing.
I wanted to propose something.
245
00:25:23,417 --> 00:25:25,742
It's like a pledge
between doctor and patient.
246
00:25:27,088 --> 00:25:30,089
We nominate a day,
like three weeks from now...
247
00:25:30,174 --> 00:25:31,585
...like New Year's Day...
248
00:25:31,676 --> 00:25:34,880
...and you mustn't harm yourself
until that day.
249
00:25:35,430 --> 00:25:38,550
You have to stick to it.
What do you think about that?
250
00:25:38,934 --> 00:25:41,769
Yeah, I think it's a fucking ridiculous idea.
251
00:25:42,021 --> 00:25:44,144
- It's been known to work.
- It won't work.
252
00:25:44,231 --> 00:25:49,309
- Might. Why don't you think about it?
- Okay, hang on. I've thought about it.
253
00:25:49,904 --> 00:25:52,858
Fuck, you made a good breakthrough.
Well done, Doc.
254
00:25:52,949 --> 00:25:55,701
Okay, we'll talk about it more
after the session.
255
00:25:56,579 --> 00:25:59,864
You've given me the will to live,
and I want to thank you for that.
256
00:26:00,249 --> 00:26:04,710
After that, I'll show you the benefits
of being more sparing with your sarcasm.
257
00:26:05,046 --> 00:26:07,287
- Okay? See you.
- Fuck you.
258
00:26:10,093 --> 00:26:12,335
So let me tell you about this pledge thing.
259
00:26:12,429 --> 00:26:15,347
See, Dr. Figure wasa "no medication" type of guy.
260
00:26:15,558 --> 00:26:19,686
And all the hard-core suicidals in his group,now including myself...
261
00:26:19,771 --> 00:26:23,222
... had agreed not to killor hang themselves before January 1.
262
00:26:24,358 --> 00:26:29,187
Can you imagine someone dead hangingfrom the light fixture in their room...
263
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,567
... thinking, "If my doctor finds outabout this, I'm fucked"?
264
00:26:34,245 --> 00:26:36,570
You did get privilegesif you signed it though.
265
00:26:36,664 --> 00:26:39,119
Going to the shopsor to the pub across the road.
266
00:26:39,208 --> 00:26:43,041
Not that I needed that becauseToby had been slipping out for weeks.
267
00:26:43,129 --> 00:26:46,046
So I promised to buy him a drink,and he took me with him.
268
00:27:04,986 --> 00:27:06,694
Hang on a second.
269
00:27:19,919 --> 00:27:23,170
- Cheers.
- Let's get a seat.
270
00:27:28,386 --> 00:27:29,964
You spilled my drink.
271
00:27:31,473 --> 00:27:36,635
- It was an accident, all right?
- Yeah, but you could apologize, you know.
272
00:27:38,023 --> 00:27:39,221
Not tonight, kids.
273
00:27:43,904 --> 00:27:45,813
Fucking unbelievable.
274
00:27:51,079 --> 00:27:52,821
All right, boys.
275
00:27:56,793 --> 00:27:58,500
Lads, lads, lads.
276
00:27:58,753 --> 00:28:03,748
Do you remember when you were
coming back from the ladies' there...
277
00:28:04,259 --> 00:28:07,260
...and you bumped into my buddy here,
you know?
278
00:28:07,471 --> 00:28:11,054
And he dropped his drink,
and he didn't get to drink any of it.
279
00:28:11,517 --> 00:28:14,056
It would be a gas if you said sorry to him.
280
00:28:14,937 --> 00:28:19,267
You see, that was an accident, you know?
I mean, call the police.
281
00:28:19,693 --> 00:28:22,398
It doesn't seem to be bothering
your girlfriend there.
282
00:28:22,488 --> 00:28:25,157
So why the fuck is it bothering you?
283
00:28:29,871 --> 00:28:31,662
A little fucking spanner.
284
00:28:33,416 --> 00:28:38,125
- No, lads, you're right. I'll get another one.
- We'll pay for it, okay? It's fine.
285
00:28:38,213 --> 00:28:40,290
- Our pleasures.
- Have a good night.
286
00:28:40,424 --> 00:28:41,373
Take care.
287
00:28:41,634 --> 00:28:45,714
- No hard feelings, okay?
- No worries, man. Take care. All the best.
288
00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:04,649
Fuck! You fucking punks! Bugger you!
289
00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:15,786
- I got a fucking stitch.
- A stitch is okay. Keep going.
290
00:29:17,130 --> 00:29:20,215
But these fellows,
they're very bad at chasing.
291
00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,303
Let's go over here.
292
00:30:00,761 --> 00:30:05,174
- So why are you at the sessions, Toby?
- Now you want to talk serious.
293
00:30:06,309 --> 00:30:07,803
Okay, fuck it.
294
00:30:10,522 --> 00:30:12,645
I killed my brother in a car accident.
295
00:30:18,364 --> 00:30:19,609
How about you?
296
00:30:21,743 --> 00:30:22,988
I don't know.
297
00:30:24,329 --> 00:30:27,247
I've never been properly diagnosed,
you know.
298
00:30:28,709 --> 00:30:31,496
I did drive a car off a cliff
a couple of weeks back.
299
00:30:31,712 --> 00:30:33,088
- Fuck off.
- Yeah.
300
00:30:33,881 --> 00:30:37,925
Are you serious?
You mean, like totally over a cliff?
301
00:30:38,887 --> 00:30:42,089
And you survived? What was it like?
302
00:30:42,724 --> 00:30:46,343
For the first five seconds,
it was fairly interesting.
303
00:30:46,937 --> 00:30:49,854
Fucking "A," I'd say so. That's brilliant.
304
00:30:50,524 --> 00:30:55,601
Well done. I've got to try that
after my pledge date.
305
00:31:02,537 --> 00:31:07,330
- For fuck's sake!
- Come here, you pair of fucking spanners!
306
00:31:07,417 --> 00:31:10,039
We only want to have a word with you.
307
00:31:39,995 --> 00:31:42,201
- Hi.
- Hi, there.
308
00:31:43,498 --> 00:31:46,702
What are you doing here?
How did you get out of your ward?
309
00:31:47,753 --> 00:31:49,413
Aren't you happy to see me?
310
00:31:53,968 --> 00:31:57,254
- So, where were you?
- I was out with Toby.
311
00:32:00,433 --> 00:32:03,803
- What do you think of him?
- I like him. He's a very nice guy.
312
00:32:05,105 --> 00:32:07,857
- Did you have a thing with him?
- Toby?
313
00:32:10,278 --> 00:32:11,393
He's sweet.
314
00:32:12,530 --> 00:32:14,190
You didn't answer my question.
315
00:32:15,867 --> 00:32:19,735
I don't know.
Toby is hard to read, you know.
316
00:32:21,039 --> 00:32:23,661
Sometimes I think he likes me.
I don't know.
317
00:32:25,127 --> 00:32:27,286
What about you? What do you think?
318
00:32:35,263 --> 00:32:38,929
- Was your father in today?
- Yeah. How did you know?
319
00:32:39,601 --> 00:32:42,175
- Did he admit you here?
- Yeah.
320
00:32:44,106 --> 00:32:45,221
So he's Irish.
321
00:32:46,734 --> 00:32:49,023
Yeah, he's Irish. My mom was American.
322
00:32:50,196 --> 00:32:52,403
- And do you live in America?
- I did.
323
00:32:52,907 --> 00:32:54,817
I moved here six months ago.
324
00:32:55,244 --> 00:32:57,201
- And where's Mom?
- She's dead.
325
00:32:58,747 --> 00:33:00,325
I'm sorry.
326
00:33:02,084 --> 00:33:04,920
Why are you standing over there?
Come and sit down.
327
00:33:17,851 --> 00:33:19,761
So are you doing that pledge thing?
328
00:33:20,563 --> 00:33:23,398
- Yeah. Are you?
- Yeah. Toby, too.
329
00:33:23,775 --> 00:33:26,480
Yeah, New Year's Day.
It's a great idea, I think.
330
00:33:27,737 --> 00:33:29,611
- I like it.
- Really?
331
00:33:30,949 --> 00:33:33,784
I don't know.
Gives me something to think about.
332
00:33:39,584 --> 00:33:43,367
So you tried to kill yourself.
Why did you want to die?
333
00:33:44,588 --> 00:33:45,918
I don't want to die.
334
00:33:47,759 --> 00:33:49,218
I don't want to be alive.
335
00:33:52,097 --> 00:33:53,639
Are you afraid of dying?
336
00:33:55,017 --> 00:33:57,804
Not for the few seconds
it takes to kill yourself.
337
00:34:09,825 --> 00:34:11,236
Lie on top of me.
338
00:34:12,244 --> 00:34:16,325
Leave your pants on, don't ask questions,
and no exchange of bodily fluids.
339
00:34:19,169 --> 00:34:20,876
You can take off your shirt.
340
00:34:55,083 --> 00:34:58,203
Don't stop. Don't stop.
341
00:34:58,753 --> 00:35:01,707
I'm just fucking wriggling, really.
342
00:35:01,798 --> 00:35:05,002
- Whatever it is, don't stop.
- Okay. I won't stop.
343
00:35:21,820 --> 00:35:23,195
Oh, God!
344
00:35:50,435 --> 00:35:52,392
What the fuck is the matter with you?
345
00:36:17,798 --> 00:36:19,340
You're just...
346
00:36:45,995 --> 00:36:48,404
"I'm singin' in the rain
347
00:36:49,708 --> 00:36:52,993
"Just singin' in the rain
348
00:36:53,086 --> 00:36:56,456
"What a glorious feeling
349
00:36:56,548 --> 00:36:59,218
"I'm happy again
350
00:37:00,636 --> 00:37:02,713
"I'm laughing at clouds"
351
00:37:02,889 --> 00:37:05,345
Have you got tickets
for the Christmas raffle?
352
00:37:05,433 --> 00:37:06,298
No.
353
00:37:06,392 --> 00:37:09,394
- Do you know where I can get them?
- No.
354
00:37:09,479 --> 00:37:11,271
That's not much good to me.
355
00:37:13,275 --> 00:37:16,062
"Let the stormy clouds chase
356
00:37:16,779 --> 00:37:20,065
"Everyone from the place
357
00:37:21,284 --> 00:37:26,658
"Come on with the rainI've a smile on my face
358
00:37:27,332 --> 00:37:30,168
"I'll walk down the lane
359
00:37:30,836 --> 00:37:33,373
"With a happy refrain
360
00:37:34,340 --> 00:37:39,086
"Just singin' in the rain"
361
00:37:39,720 --> 00:37:43,339
It was at that momentthat I decided to keep the pledge.
362
00:37:44,685 --> 00:37:46,309
Don't ask me why.
363
00:38:03,706 --> 00:38:06,113
Once every two weeks, there's bowling.
364
00:38:06,208 --> 00:38:09,328
That's where we're encouraged to mixwith the rest of society...
365
00:38:09,420 --> 00:38:11,412
... and behave like normal people.
366
00:38:11,630 --> 00:38:16,209
All right, lads. Get your shoes. Let's go.
Be sure you get the right sizes.
367
00:38:29,858 --> 00:38:32,017
You're very bad at bowling, Toby.
368
00:38:32,654 --> 00:38:36,568
- We should do something this weekend.
- Like what? Have a darts championship?
369
00:38:36,658 --> 00:38:40,905
I've had enough of fucking broken
rubber darts. I mean, do something.
370
00:38:43,331 --> 00:38:45,408
Driving Miss Daisy is on the telly.
371
00:38:45,626 --> 00:38:48,544
We can invite some of the lunatics
from the high-risk ward.
372
00:38:48,630 --> 00:38:49,910
It could be a laugh.
373
00:38:50,006 --> 00:38:53,172
How do you ever hear
with that stuff blaring in your ears?
374
00:38:53,259 --> 00:38:56,213
Shut up. I was starting to like you.
Don't blow it.
375
00:38:56,304 --> 00:38:59,424
But we should do something.
I mean, go drinking...
376
00:38:59,641 --> 00:39:02,512
...or take some drugs.
- What if we get caught?
377
00:39:02,645 --> 00:39:05,562
If we get caught, fuck it.
We just lose a few privileges.
378
00:39:05,731 --> 00:39:08,768
We'll round up a load of loonies
and head off to the country.
379
00:39:08,860 --> 00:39:10,603
We could have a party in my flat.
380
00:39:10,695 --> 00:39:13,269
- Where do we get the people?
- These are our people.
381
00:39:13,364 --> 00:39:15,690
We'd hand out the address
to lots of day patients.
382
00:39:15,784 --> 00:39:18,191
Say there's free gargle.
They bring their mates.
383
00:39:18,286 --> 00:39:21,122
Everyone wants to do something
on New Year's Eve.
384
00:39:21,206 --> 00:39:22,285
Fuck!
385
00:39:24,210 --> 00:39:27,828
No, I'm telling you.
The whole thing is fucking wanks and gays.
386
00:39:28,548 --> 00:39:32,248
- Bowling is shite.
- You shut the fuck up! I'm on the edge.
387
00:39:42,021 --> 00:39:43,812
Wednesdays are visiting days.
388
00:39:43,897 --> 00:39:46,852
I really look forward to thembecause my brother comes in.
389
00:39:47,443 --> 00:39:49,187
And he's fantastic.
390
00:40:15,391 --> 00:40:18,226
I saw you with your brother today
in the garden.
391
00:40:19,228 --> 00:40:21,719
What kind of a relationship
do you have with him?
392
00:40:24,567 --> 00:40:28,150
Did you ever see that Marx Brothers sketch
where Chico was asked:
393
00:40:28,738 --> 00:40:33,401
"You love your brother, don't you?"
And he says, "No, but I'm used to him."
394
00:40:35,788 --> 00:40:39,038
- I like the Marx Brothers.
- I like the Marx Brothers, too.
395
00:40:40,417 --> 00:40:43,502
So you have a history of male depression
in your family.
396
00:40:44,130 --> 00:40:46,800
He's been giving you the old rundown,
has he?
397
00:40:47,008 --> 00:40:48,836
He's great, that Mikey.
398
00:40:49,469 --> 00:40:52,423
I have a history of male depression
in my family. So what?
399
00:40:52,514 --> 00:40:54,554
How do you think it's affected you?
400
00:40:55,309 --> 00:40:57,516
Your mother died when you were 10.
401
00:40:58,229 --> 00:41:00,850
Do you think
that's why your father killed himself?
402
00:41:02,108 --> 00:41:04,813
Or was he suffering
from hereditary depression?
403
00:41:04,902 --> 00:41:08,568
I don't know. I suppose
after all these years of loneliness...
404
00:41:08,657 --> 00:41:11,658
...he finally saw the light,
call it what you want.
405
00:41:11,869 --> 00:41:14,158
- I'm proud of him.
- What about yourself?
406
00:41:14,330 --> 00:41:15,610
On the road.
407
00:41:16,999 --> 00:41:18,458
Did you see the light?
408
00:41:18,543 --> 00:41:21,627
I don't want to talk about what you see
at a moment like that.
409
00:41:22,547 --> 00:41:24,623
It would scare the wits out of you.
410
00:41:25,341 --> 00:41:29,043
If I could describe it,
if I could do justice to it...
411
00:41:30,347 --> 00:41:32,636
...we'd all be jumping out the windows.
412
00:41:34,310 --> 00:41:38,224
Up until recently,
cutting yourself was enough.
413
00:41:38,731 --> 00:41:42,017
That's just a matter of letting
a little air out of the tires.
414
00:41:42,236 --> 00:41:43,896
Doesn't work anymore though.
415
00:41:45,363 --> 00:41:48,235
I can talk about this
until the cows come home, Doctor.
416
00:41:48,659 --> 00:41:52,075
I know more about the business of suicide
in my baby finger...
417
00:41:52,163 --> 00:41:55,414
...than you do in all your years of training
and Freud reading.
418
00:41:55,499 --> 00:41:57,576
I guaran-fucking-tee you that.
419
00:41:58,836 --> 00:42:00,379
I know you do.
420
00:42:13,561 --> 00:42:17,309
Have you ever heard of people,
seeing their own blood and then...
421
00:42:18,275 --> 00:42:19,686
...getting excited?
422
00:42:19,943 --> 00:42:22,101
- You mean sexually?
- Yeah.
423
00:42:22,488 --> 00:42:24,030
Yes, I've heard of it.
424
00:42:24,240 --> 00:42:25,568
Is it for real?
425
00:42:27,118 --> 00:42:28,493
Yes, it's very real.
426
00:42:31,498 --> 00:42:33,406
Why are you interested in it?
427
00:42:37,837 --> 00:42:39,213
Be careful, Jonathan.
428
00:42:40,757 --> 00:42:41,920
What do you mean?
429
00:42:43,010 --> 00:42:44,255
What I say.
430
00:42:49,475 --> 00:42:53,520
Doctors discourage relationshipsbetween suicidal patients in hospital.
431
00:42:54,397 --> 00:42:56,888
I mean,you wouldn't fucking blame them, but...
432
00:42:57,067 --> 00:42:59,273
Well, they go along with themup to a point.
433
00:42:59,361 --> 00:43:02,196
But once either partybecomes seriously attached...
434
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:06,065
... they become worried, becausewhen the inevitable breakup comes...
435
00:43:06,493 --> 00:43:08,985
... the person left behindis in twice the danger.
436
00:43:09,497 --> 00:43:12,581
So you have to be more carefulwith people inside...
437
00:43:12,709 --> 00:43:16,043
... because they take you more seriouslythan people on the outside.
438
00:43:16,505 --> 00:43:19,257
You can't fuck aroundthe way you normally do.
439
00:43:19,758 --> 00:43:20,874
Guess who?
440
00:43:21,802 --> 00:43:25,966
It's you. Gosh!
You know, I'm so happy to see you.
441
00:43:26,140 --> 00:43:28,465
I haven't stopped thinking
about you all day.
442
00:43:31,730 --> 00:43:36,808
So is it okay if I walk with you
through these beautiful gardens of ours?
443
00:43:37,987 --> 00:43:39,446
Sure. Why not?
444
00:43:44,452 --> 00:43:46,741
- How's the arm?
- Fine.
445
00:43:47,455 --> 00:43:49,532
- It's all bandaged up.
- Good.
446
00:43:50,291 --> 00:43:53,328
- And how's your hand?
- What about my hand?
447
00:43:53,503 --> 00:43:56,077
It was just that it kept hitting off my face.
448
00:43:56,173 --> 00:43:59,839
- I was just wondering if it was okay.
- Right.
449
00:44:00,511 --> 00:44:04,972
- Yeah, it's fine. How's your face?
- Fine. It's fine.
450
00:44:05,933 --> 00:44:09,766
We should stop talking about our wounds.
That could take all fucking day.
451
00:44:09,855 --> 00:44:13,722
Anyway, it was my ego that was bruised,
not my face.
452
00:44:14,568 --> 00:44:15,398
Why?
453
00:44:16,779 --> 00:44:18,238
Why? I don't know why.
454
00:44:21,242 --> 00:44:25,821
There's a girl in the high-security ward
who cuts open her abdomen...
455
00:44:25,914 --> 00:44:28,156
...takes her intestines out
and plays with them.
456
00:44:28,250 --> 00:44:31,536
They stitch her back up.
Week later, she does the same thing.
457
00:44:31,629 --> 00:44:34,547
She's really lovely.
Why don't you go figure her out?
458
00:44:34,632 --> 00:44:36,957
Now, you see, I haven't met her.
459
00:44:37,051 --> 00:44:40,421
And she didn't come and slap me
out of the blue for no reason.
460
00:44:40,555 --> 00:44:43,674
- I don't need your help.
- I'm not trying to help you.
461
00:44:45,435 --> 00:44:47,013
Just take care of yourself.
462
00:44:48,271 --> 00:44:50,181
You know what? Fuck it.
463
00:44:50,441 --> 00:44:53,856
You want to come up to my room
for some autoerotic asphyxiation?
464
00:44:54,988 --> 00:44:58,273
- Yeah? Now?
- Yeah. I got some hook-eye screws.
465
00:44:58,366 --> 00:45:01,283
We could hang ourselves,
I could smack you around a bit.
466
00:45:01,369 --> 00:45:04,074
- Give you a good time.
- That's a fabulous idea.
467
00:45:04,164 --> 00:45:07,284
- That'd be fun.
- Maybe tomorrow. I can't wait.
468
00:45:08,418 --> 00:45:10,791
Do you want to know
what I think we should do?
469
00:45:13,633 --> 00:45:15,791
- You want to hear it?
- Yeah. Is it dirty?
470
00:45:15,885 --> 00:45:17,593
It's disgusting.
471
00:45:20,139 --> 00:45:23,260
I think we should go sometime
and get some ice creams.
472
00:45:26,230 --> 00:45:29,231
- Just the two of us. Get some fresh air.
- Sure. Sure.
473
00:45:29,317 --> 00:45:33,480
- I'll buy you an ice cream.
- Okay. Call me. I'll be in my room.
474
00:45:38,701 --> 00:45:41,193
I'll be waiting for your call. Call me.
475
00:45:56,513 --> 00:45:59,799
Myself and Toby's breakoutsbecame a regular weekly thing.
476
00:45:59,892 --> 00:46:01,765
He'd always take me with him.
477
00:46:03,020 --> 00:46:05,262
We both agreedthat a big Christmas party...
478
00:46:05,356 --> 00:46:07,644
... outside the hospitalwas an excellent idea.
479
00:46:09,276 --> 00:46:11,566
Toby decided to take a trial run.
480
00:46:14,574 --> 00:46:18,524
He swore that he could hot-wire any carin under 10 seconds.
481
00:46:27,338 --> 00:46:29,211
It's fucking beautiful, isn't it?
482
00:46:31,593 --> 00:46:33,799
Let me tell you something
about my brother.
483
00:46:36,681 --> 00:46:39,386
He was in the hospital for a month
after the accident.
484
00:46:39,476 --> 00:46:41,968
He was just wasting away.
485
00:46:42,521 --> 00:46:45,688
We all knew he was dying.
He was on a machine and everything.
486
00:46:46,526 --> 00:46:50,440
I think if I'd lost anyone else,
it wouldn't have been so bad.
487
00:46:51,448 --> 00:46:56,324
I think I can handle death
and missing people, and that.
488
00:46:58,914 --> 00:47:02,579
What I don't understand
is that there were a few basic...
489
00:47:02,918 --> 00:47:06,085
...simple things I wished
I could have told him before he went.
490
00:47:06,673 --> 00:47:08,464
Like the fact that I loved him.
491
00:47:09,884 --> 00:47:13,170
And that I never went a day
without thinking about him...
492
00:47:13,889 --> 00:47:15,798
...or talking about him to people.
493
00:47:17,977 --> 00:47:20,646
And since then,
the image that sticks in my head...
494
00:47:21,105 --> 00:47:23,596
...is that over the month in the hospital...
495
00:47:24,525 --> 00:47:27,645
...I couldn't get it together enough
to tell him those things.
496
00:47:30,323 --> 00:47:32,530
I always thought I'd say them in the end.
497
00:47:36,622 --> 00:47:40,869
And one night, the nurse brought him in
a cup of tea and he had a few sips of it.
498
00:47:41,669 --> 00:47:44,789
And I went out to the toilets.
499
00:47:48,093 --> 00:47:49,635
And when I came back in...
500
00:47:51,722 --> 00:47:53,003
...he was a dead man.
501
00:47:59,146 --> 00:48:02,266
All the family and friends around him,
and all the tears and...
502
00:48:07,281 --> 00:48:09,356
My elbow touched off his cup.
503
00:48:12,035 --> 00:48:14,075
And there was still heat in it.
504
00:48:17,584 --> 00:48:21,498
And that, it totally fucked me up,
you know.
505
00:48:23,756 --> 00:48:25,417
I mean, the idea...
506
00:48:29,138 --> 00:48:30,964
It was his tea, you know.
507
00:48:33,726 --> 00:48:36,051
It was his tea, and it was still warm, and...
508
00:48:38,731 --> 00:48:40,392
It had outlived him.
509
00:48:45,072 --> 00:48:46,614
It was his tea.
510
00:48:58,295 --> 00:49:01,082
A plane is coming
into Dublin Airport there.
511
00:49:04,009 --> 00:49:05,385
Full of people.
512
00:49:08,014 --> 00:49:09,757
I wonder if it'll crash now.
513
00:49:16,064 --> 00:49:17,439
Safe and sound.
514
00:49:21,153 --> 00:49:22,861
Fuck, I'm sorry.
515
00:49:22,947 --> 00:49:25,319
I don't know why I'm talking about this.
516
00:49:25,907 --> 00:49:28,862
We'll go back.
It's fucking freezing in here anyway.
517
00:49:54,439 --> 00:49:55,768
Wanks!
518
00:50:05,409 --> 00:50:08,909
Hey, pal, give it up, will you?
You're embarrassing yourself.
519
00:50:09,247 --> 00:50:12,248
I'm getting better, lads.
Don't worry. Wanker.
520
00:50:13,460 --> 00:50:15,333
Are you trying to start a fight?
521
00:50:16,422 --> 00:50:17,750
Chill out, honey.
522
00:50:18,340 --> 00:50:21,127
What are you, a homosexual or something?
523
00:50:23,554 --> 00:50:25,381
No more than you're a dickhead.
524
00:50:26,474 --> 00:50:29,144
You're distracting us,
you northern fuck, you.
525
00:50:29,227 --> 00:50:31,897
We're trying to play here,
and you're fooling around.
526
00:50:31,980 --> 00:50:33,854
You're in my fucking peripherals.
527
00:50:33,941 --> 00:50:36,313
Mind your own business.
He's not bothering you.
528
00:50:36,402 --> 00:50:38,727
Shut the fuck up, you ugly mutt, you.
529
00:50:39,905 --> 00:50:41,530
What did you say to her?
530
00:50:43,576 --> 00:50:45,450
Forget it, Toby. Just bowl.
531
00:50:49,583 --> 00:50:51,161
You're a wise man.
532
00:51:02,722 --> 00:51:06,767
It's a fucking strike!
Did you see that? That strike.
533
00:51:07,351 --> 00:51:10,222
You're going to have to die for that now,
you prick!
534
00:51:11,857 --> 00:51:15,641
What's your problem? Do you want
to fucking get involved in this too?
535
00:51:15,778 --> 00:51:19,277
If you want to get at him, you're going
to have to go through me first.
536
00:51:19,365 --> 00:51:22,402
But bear with me,
while I try and explain something to you.
537
00:51:26,289 --> 00:51:30,038
Come on. Come on.
Give it to me in the fucking neck.
538
00:51:30,543 --> 00:51:33,035
But listen very carefully first before you do.
539
00:51:34,256 --> 00:51:38,670
Whatever you do to me,
I'll have enough energy to come back...
540
00:51:38,761 --> 00:51:40,220
...and get one in at you.
541
00:51:41,306 --> 00:51:45,173
And as sure as I'm standing here,
I don't give a fuck what happens to me.
542
00:51:46,519 --> 00:51:48,678
You'd better kill me with your first shot.
543
00:51:48,772 --> 00:51:51,774
If you don't, I'll come back
and take your fucking head off.
544
00:51:53,319 --> 00:51:55,644
Give it to me in the fucking neck.
Come on.
545
00:51:56,406 --> 00:51:57,947
Come on, you wanker!
546
00:52:02,370 --> 00:52:07,198
Dean, leave it. He's from the hospital.
547
00:52:16,094 --> 00:52:17,422
Yeah.
548
00:52:29,567 --> 00:52:32,319
Jonathan, come here a second.
549
00:52:49,380 --> 00:52:52,547
- That was a close call.
- I suppose.
550
00:52:54,052 --> 00:52:55,630
What if he'd gone for you?
551
00:52:57,181 --> 00:52:59,387
Doctor, he'd have been doing me a favor.
552
00:53:00,851 --> 00:53:02,310
You're trembling.
553
00:53:03,896 --> 00:53:06,814
Do you really believe that,
or are you just saying it?
554
00:53:10,195 --> 00:53:11,654
I felt it at the time.
555
00:53:12,614 --> 00:53:13,776
What about now?
556
00:53:21,499 --> 00:53:23,657
Isn't it a relief to be alive?
557
00:54:28,155 --> 00:54:31,855
- How's it going?
- It's good. How are you?
558
00:54:33,368 --> 00:54:34,649
I'm okay.
559
00:54:37,247 --> 00:54:40,084
- I wrote another poem, you know.
- Yeah?
560
00:54:41,252 --> 00:54:43,790
- I like your poetry.
- Thanks a million.
561
00:54:44,672 --> 00:54:46,630
- Do you want to hear it?
- Yeah.
562
00:54:55,768 --> 00:54:57,760
It's called The Demons.
563
00:55:04,528 --> 00:55:06,686
"Deep within these flesh walls
564
00:55:06,947 --> 00:55:09,235
"A raging monster screams
565
00:55:10,451 --> 00:55:12,657
"The pain is felt when I'm asleep
566
00:55:13,037 --> 00:55:14,946
"And fills my every dreams
567
00:55:16,415 --> 00:55:18,455
"To overcome the demon within
568
00:55:18,918 --> 00:55:20,745
"I found a light that shone
569
00:55:21,797 --> 00:55:24,418
"And called out loud and guided me
570
00:55:25,383 --> 00:55:27,756
"That light inspired me on
571
00:55:29,305 --> 00:55:31,677
"When darkness falls across mine eye
572
00:55:32,558 --> 00:55:34,349
"A light within does shine
573
00:55:35,561 --> 00:55:37,934
"And helps me when the demon screams
574
00:55:38,105 --> 00:55:39,600
"That light to me
575
00:55:40,692 --> 00:55:42,103
"sublime"
576
00:55:44,822 --> 00:55:46,102
That's it.
577
00:55:49,826 --> 00:55:52,069
- What do you think of it?
- I like it.
578
00:55:52,663 --> 00:55:55,071
- It's good.
- It's not bad.
579
00:56:00,547 --> 00:56:01,958
Is it for me?
580
00:56:04,718 --> 00:56:06,426
Not necessarily.
581
00:56:17,315 --> 00:56:20,102
I'm going to the toilets.
I'll see you around.
582
00:56:31,956 --> 00:56:33,830
I didn't really have to go.
583
00:56:41,383 --> 00:56:45,428
I hope I didn't pressure you in the past.
584
00:56:47,432 --> 00:56:49,340
No. I mean...
585
00:56:51,060 --> 00:56:53,100
You're not like that, you know.
586
00:56:54,939 --> 00:56:58,106
You're what my mom
would call "a perfect gentleman."
587
00:57:02,573 --> 00:57:03,687
Come here.
588
00:57:28,643 --> 00:57:30,054
I'll see you around.
589
00:57:41,741 --> 00:57:43,283
- Hi.
- Hi, there.
590
00:57:44,243 --> 00:57:47,030
- Were you out for the day?
- Yeah. I was with my dad.
591
00:57:47,205 --> 00:57:48,450
How is your dad?
592
00:57:49,999 --> 00:57:51,410
What are you doing later?
593
00:57:53,504 --> 00:57:55,247
Think I'll catch a show.
594
00:57:57,091 --> 00:57:59,761
- Do you know where my room is?
- Yes, I do.
595
00:58:11,398 --> 00:58:12,561
How was today?
596
00:58:15,027 --> 00:58:16,058
It was fine.
597
00:58:18,030 --> 00:58:19,858
I didn't enjoy it really.
598
00:58:20,700 --> 00:58:22,408
Your dad, how was he?
599
00:58:23,870 --> 00:58:25,994
I don't know. I don't understand him.
600
00:58:28,876 --> 00:58:31,034
We went home for lunch today.
601
00:58:34,507 --> 00:58:36,879
I haven't been there in ages.
602
00:58:40,054 --> 00:58:41,513
There are these cliffs...
603
00:58:43,016 --> 00:58:44,676
...10 minutes from my house.
604
00:58:45,686 --> 00:58:47,643
Used to go there when I was a kid.
605
00:58:49,648 --> 00:58:54,275
Last time I was there I was 7
and had a picnic with my mom.
606
00:58:57,782 --> 00:58:59,490
It was nice and sunny.
607
00:59:01,453 --> 00:59:04,573
We took a nap on the blanket,
I had my head on her stomach...
608
00:59:04,665 --> 00:59:07,666
...and I could feel it moving up and down
with her breath.
609
00:59:09,837 --> 00:59:12,791
We decided to go home.
610
00:59:14,049 --> 00:59:16,007
She wanted to walk along the cliffs.
611
00:59:19,306 --> 00:59:20,765
I don't know. She just...
612
00:59:25,354 --> 00:59:27,263
...lost her footing.
613
00:59:28,690 --> 00:59:31,228
She just went over.
614
00:59:35,614 --> 00:59:38,106
No sound, no scream.
615
00:59:42,790 --> 00:59:44,249
And I looked over...
616
00:59:44,625 --> 00:59:49,002
...and I could see her on the rocks below,
all curled up like she was taking a nap.
617
00:59:58,557 --> 01:00:01,723
Nowadays I have this dream
that I'm back at the cliff...
618
01:00:02,937 --> 01:00:07,764
...and I'm looking down,
and I can see her curled up...
619
01:00:09,694 --> 01:00:11,568
...still there, sleeping.
620
01:00:14,991 --> 01:00:16,735
And I want to get down to her.
621
01:00:18,746 --> 01:00:20,406
But I can't figure out how.
622
01:00:25,753 --> 01:00:28,291
Then I realize I could just jump.
623
01:00:32,385 --> 01:00:34,177
So I jump.
624
01:00:35,847 --> 01:00:37,841
But it's not like falling. It's...
625
01:00:39,143 --> 01:00:40,969
I just float down.
626
01:00:43,897 --> 01:00:48,359
And then I'm with her,
and I have my head on her stomach.
627
01:00:52,949 --> 01:00:54,574
And I can feel her breathing.
628
01:00:56,370 --> 01:00:57,401
And it's...
629
01:00:58,914 --> 01:01:00,872
It's so warm and nice.
630
01:01:04,337 --> 01:01:08,170
And then everything just fades away.
631
01:01:21,189 --> 01:01:23,146
And where was your dad that day?
632
01:01:25,943 --> 01:01:27,402
I don't know.
633
01:01:29,448 --> 01:01:30,823
I think, work.
634
01:01:36,205 --> 01:01:37,664
He blames himself?
635
01:01:40,043 --> 01:01:41,241
I don't know.
636
01:01:44,547 --> 01:01:48,462
You know, he loved her so much.
637
01:01:50,929 --> 01:01:53,847
A daughter is a poor substitute for a wife.
638
01:01:56,059 --> 01:01:58,765
You couldn't be a poor substitute
for anyone.
639
01:02:02,150 --> 01:02:03,182
Thanks.
640
01:02:06,613 --> 01:02:08,653
It's nice of you to say.
641
01:02:12,703 --> 01:02:16,404
You should go back to your room now.
They do a walk-around at midnight.
642
01:02:21,797 --> 01:02:22,995
I'll see you.
643
01:02:23,756 --> 01:02:25,299
I could talk to you, though.
644
01:02:26,218 --> 01:02:27,381
Yeah?
645
01:02:29,554 --> 01:02:30,551
Good night.
646
01:02:36,979 --> 01:02:39,138
- What does that mean?
- It means:
647
01:02:39,441 --> 01:02:42,014
"Say your prayers and sleep well," in Irish.
648
01:02:42,652 --> 01:02:43,732
It's nice.
649
01:02:44,404 --> 01:02:46,611
My dad used to say that to me every night.
650
01:02:47,950 --> 01:02:49,065
Do you miss him?
651
01:02:49,993 --> 01:02:51,702
I miss him saying that to me.
652
01:02:51,954 --> 01:02:53,033
You miss him.
653
01:02:53,998 --> 01:02:56,620
Not as much as you do,
by the sounds of that dream.
654
01:03:02,508 --> 01:03:03,753
Good night.
655
01:04:10,123 --> 01:04:12,696
All good escape plansstart by acquiring the wheels.
656
01:04:12,792 --> 01:04:14,916
Something fast and discreet.
657
01:04:16,213 --> 01:04:19,167
Rachel suggested her dad's houseas a venue for our party.
658
01:04:19,258 --> 01:04:21,749
He'd be away,so we'd have the run of the place.
659
01:04:22,178 --> 01:04:24,503
By giving out the addressto the day patients...
660
01:04:24,597 --> 01:04:27,218
... news of the partywould spread like wildfire.
661
01:04:35,776 --> 01:04:39,228
- What's the story? Who we waiting for?
- Our hostess for the evening.
662
01:04:39,322 --> 01:04:41,480
She said she'd bunk out around 10:00.
663
01:05:07,352 --> 01:05:10,804
We spiked the guard's flaskwith a cocktail of stolen medication.
664
01:05:11,731 --> 01:05:13,190
Happy New Year.
665
01:06:00,993 --> 01:06:02,987
Come on. Let's go for a downer.
666
01:06:04,539 --> 01:06:06,662
- There's something I want to say.
- Yeah?
667
01:06:06,750 --> 01:06:08,458
I'm totally pissed, so...
668
01:06:08,878 --> 01:06:13,089
Fuck it. I'm just going to say it.
I've regretted not saying things in the past.
669
01:06:13,717 --> 01:06:17,761
I just want to say that,
although we have some shite in common...
670
01:06:18,805 --> 01:06:20,882
...you're not in my ballpark.
671
01:06:22,100 --> 01:06:23,595
That's all I want to say.
672
01:06:24,144 --> 01:06:27,478
- What are you fucking talking about?
- I just wanted to say that.
673
01:06:28,565 --> 01:06:30,724
You're not what people think you are.
674
01:06:31,318 --> 01:06:34,319
I mean, you're not even close. I'm close.
675
01:06:34,697 --> 01:06:39,027
I'm everything they say I am.
I am the genuine fucking article.
676
01:06:40,579 --> 01:06:42,572
I am telling you now.
677
01:06:44,291 --> 01:06:48,585
Don't get fucking cornered
by other people...
678
01:06:49,046 --> 01:06:52,000
...and what they expect you to do,
you know.
679
01:06:54,969 --> 01:06:57,259
- I'm drunk.
- You are.
680
01:06:57,514 --> 01:07:01,180
That's all I've got to say.
You're the fucking man.
681
01:07:01,977 --> 01:07:04,764
You're the fucking man.
Fuck the begrudgers.
682
01:07:05,356 --> 01:07:07,763
- You know, just fuck them.
- Fuck them.
683
01:07:10,695 --> 01:07:12,569
Let's go bring in the New Year.
684
01:07:12,823 --> 01:07:15,195
- You're the fucking man.
- You're the fucking man.
685
01:07:15,283 --> 01:07:16,694
You are the fucking man.
686
01:09:03,860 --> 01:09:06,529
- Why won't you kiss me?
- I am.
687
01:09:14,622 --> 01:09:16,329
Why won't you kiss me properly?
688
01:09:17,667 --> 01:09:19,162
Because I'm unusual.
689
01:09:24,383 --> 01:09:25,663
You don't want me?
690
01:09:26,468 --> 01:09:30,087
Listen to me. I want to make love to you.
691
01:09:30,847 --> 01:09:33,055
I'd just like to start with a proper kiss.
692
01:10:55,064 --> 01:10:57,058
Ten, nine...
693
01:10:58,193 --> 01:10:59,272
...eight...
694
01:10:59,820 --> 01:11:05,027
...seven, six, five, four...
695
01:11:19,342 --> 01:11:22,425
You can never knowwhat was going through a person's mind...
696
01:11:22,511 --> 01:11:23,886
... at that exact moment.
697
01:11:25,848 --> 01:11:28,090
If they survive, they'll never tell you.
698
01:11:28,560 --> 01:11:32,640
If they succeed, all you can dois spend the rest of your life guilty...
699
01:11:32,898 --> 01:11:35,685
... because it might have hadsomething to do with you.
700
01:11:36,235 --> 01:11:39,106
Your only concern can befor the people they leave behind.
701
01:11:39,363 --> 01:11:41,190
They're the ones to look out for.
702
01:14:03,562 --> 01:14:05,555
And what is Rachel's dad going to do?
703
01:14:07,358 --> 01:14:08,982
I don't know. We'll see.
704
01:14:12,447 --> 01:14:14,321
She's so vulnerable.
705
01:14:22,792 --> 01:14:24,701
What's going to happen to her, Doc?
706
01:14:25,962 --> 01:14:27,622
What's going to happen to you?
707
01:14:32,343 --> 01:14:34,716
I can only help people who are really sick.
708
01:14:36,765 --> 01:14:38,972
Even then, half the time it doesn't work.
709
01:14:42,688 --> 01:14:44,348
Who's going to help you?
710
01:14:58,246 --> 01:14:59,955
What are you looking at?
711
01:15:01,250 --> 01:15:02,530
Nothing.
712
01:15:02,626 --> 01:15:05,331
Are you blind?
You have to be looking at something.
713
01:15:07,632 --> 01:15:09,625
I know what's going on in your mind.
714
01:15:11,011 --> 01:15:12,635
- Do you?
- Yes.
715
01:15:15,891 --> 01:15:18,892
What are you hanging around here for,
standing at windows?
716
01:15:21,856 --> 01:15:25,901
Anyway, this is my window really.
717
01:15:26,778 --> 01:15:28,569
Everyone knows that.
718
01:15:33,452 --> 01:15:35,196
I've been here for years.
719
01:16:03,818 --> 01:16:06,523
Security? There's a young guy,
just stolen a bike.
720
01:16:06,613 --> 01:16:09,400
He'll be heading for the main gate
in a minute or two.
721
01:16:10,617 --> 01:16:11,992
Yeah, a push bike.
722
01:16:14,205 --> 01:16:17,657
He's wearing a green coat and a hat.
723
01:16:22,547 --> 01:16:24,706
Let him through. Okay?
724
01:16:53,915 --> 01:16:55,623
It's beautiful here.
725
01:17:03,258 --> 01:17:05,298
You can't take this all on your own.
726
01:17:09,557 --> 01:17:11,383
So are you all good now?
727
01:17:14,646 --> 01:17:17,849
Too many near-death experiences.
You're beginning to think twice.
728
01:17:37,712 --> 01:17:39,456
Do you want to know the truth?
729
01:17:41,883 --> 01:17:45,549
If it's a matter of life and death
between people like you and me...
730
01:17:48,641 --> 01:17:50,550
...then I want to outlive you.
731
01:17:53,688 --> 01:17:55,931
And I want to see what happens to you...
732
01:17:58,110 --> 01:17:59,569
...because I like you.
733
01:18:02,615 --> 01:18:03,895
I can't.
734
01:18:07,953 --> 01:18:10,161
What if we are still together in a year?
735
01:18:12,500 --> 01:18:13,698
Would we be?
736
01:18:15,629 --> 01:18:17,456
I see it happening.
737
01:18:26,224 --> 01:18:28,051
I don't know.
738
01:18:32,314 --> 01:18:34,022
So, you think you love me?
739
01:18:36,860 --> 01:18:38,106
I know I love you.
59659
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