All language subtitles for Non mi muovo (1943) ENG

I WON'T MOVE!

Always you.

You think you're the owner
of this street?

There are other poor mortals

who occasionally
have the misfortune to bump into you.

Hi, Carlo!

Eat, so you'll get typhus
and I never see you again.

No, thanks.
Typhus is in good hands.

When will you learn
to be more considerate?

Your daughter is old enough
to get married.

I've told you many times,
why did you stop working for me?

With your silver tongue, your knowledge
of art objects, of antiques,

and your effrontery,
you could've earned what you wanted.

Make up your mind, come back to me.

In a auction house?
Being an auctioneer, a charlatan?

Carlo Mezzetti has brains and
must give his daughter a better future.

The street is full of surprises.
That's why I prefer the street.

Carlo Mezzetti requires the world,
and maybe it's not big enough.

Carlo Mezzetti is crazy.

Bye.
Anyway, you know where I am.

Would you work as employee?

Don't ask me, I was born at sea.

Sea, open air. That's what I need,

and not to close myself
within four walls.

I'd feel like a poor bird in a cage.

# With that voice
so sweet and tender #

# You told me you die for me #

# The dreams of someone who loves #

# The dreams
that I'm dreaming with you #

# And we sing in two voices
and we embrace #

# To live #

# Me with you
and you with me #

Murderer!
You almost killed my father!

I'll send you to jail!
Both of you!

My father is sick. Very sick!
He's getting worse every hour!

Only an irresponsible man,
a criminal…

I brought here a prescription,

and he, with the air of an expert,
he never stopped talking,

"The doctor didn't know anything.
They prescribe anything to save time."

But he would give me a cure
to heal my father in a few hours.

Because he knows more than doctors!

The practice is worth more
than 100 doctors!

And, after all, he's almost a doctor!

And a lot of other things.

And I, like an idiot,
let myself be fooled by his chatter.

I apologize. You got every reason.

You can't trust this jerk.

- Watch your mouth.
- Shut up, I'll deal with you later!

I tell you that
for you father's liver ache,

because we must distinguish
between liver and liver,

the alcoholic mixture
that I, Sgueglia, prescribed,

must, and I say must,
lead to worsening his health.

- Worsening?!
- Yes, sir. Gradual and increasing.

Your father will have
a lot of pain tonight,

but you don't have
to worry about,

because the collapse
that will make him lose consciousness,

won't happen before early morning.

I tell you in advance
that you'll see your father drooling,

non-responsive and with
a swollen tongue,

but you don't have to worry,

because after this worsening,
he will die...

recover!

No, no!
Please, don't make a fuss.

This madman will get
what he deserves.

Let's hope everything
will be resolved soon.

Anyway, keep me informed

and if your father, heaven forbid,
gets worse...

I will send you Dr. Pacchietti
who is a luminary.

Woe to you, I'll knock you off!

I'll knock you off!
What a pharmacy is this?!

- Did you see?
- Excuse me.

I'd like six cents of licorice.

What licorice?! We don't have it!
Go away!

This is another trouble
you got me in.

This is what I've deserved
by doing good.

I took you in my home,
I gave you a job, food, a bed.

Not only to you but also to your wife.
Just out of compassion.

But, instead of just being a clerk,
you decided to be a doctor.

No, one moment,
let's be clear about this.

You didn't do it out of compassion.

You give me a bed but also
a lower salary. That's the first point.

You give me food but my poor wife
is your servant and cook.

She saves you money. Second point.

Besides, it's not true that
I decided to be a doctor,

I'm a doctor.

Yes, I am a doctor!

I've always been a doctor!

My great-grandfather, my grandfather,
my father,

a brother of my father, my uncles,
all my relatives were famous doctors.

If I don't have a diploma giving me
the right to sign prescriptions,

it doesn't mean Medicine isn't
in my eyes, nose, hands and blood.

And I'm better than many doctors,
including you.

Keep your hands off!

- Olimpia! - What did I tell you
when I took you in my home?

What did we agree?
Your wife had to cook and serve.

And you had to be a clerk
and clean the pharmacy.

Sweeping with a broom and sawdust.
Got it?

Make up your mind.
Be a clerk here,

and without glasses,
because you see perfectly,

or a doctor out of here!

Whether I see perfectly or not
is my business,

but I prefer to be a doctor.

I'll practice medicine, I'll study,
I'll get a degree,

and you will have to prepare
the prescriptions that I sign.

You'll have to sweep
the pharmacy and cook!

Olimpia!
I've been fed up for a long time!

- Olimpia!
- Go starve wherever you want!

- Olimpia.
- What happened?

- Drop everything.
- I can't leave the soup on the fire.

- What do we have to do?
- I argued with Don Bartolomeo.

And this time, definitively.

He wanted you to be a servant
and me to sweep the pharmacy.

Maybe you misunderstood.
Don Bartolomeo is so good.

Good? He's a bastard.

But I made up my mind.
I can't be forced to work in a pharmacy.

I feel there is something inside me.

Think it over.
The other time was the same.

Then he forgave us
and made us come back.

This time is different.
Pack our bags and let's go.

Wait, how can we go away
like this...

Let's eat first.
I know you, you'll change your mind.

I won't change my mind.

- I've already worked half a day.
Did you cook half a lunch? - Yes.

This sausage belongs to me. Let's go.

- Where?
- Let's go to my friend Carlo Mezzetti.

He always said, "My door is open
for you at any moment".

- Let's go.
- But...

- Wives must follow their husbands.
- Yes, I'll follow you.

Listen,
my house was yours for a year.

You didn't pay rent for 12 months.

I've tried everything
to throw you out:

out-of-court notification,

eviction orders,
first, second and third.

I've reported you to the police.

I threatened you.
We almost came to blows.

I've had your furniture seized.

But I'm exhausted, I give up.

You know the code
better than a judge.

And your effrontery is astonishing.

Do you mind if I smoke?

Look, I appeal to your conscience.

I rented my house
and the new tenant must enter today.

What are we doing? Another fight?

No, let's settle this
in a friendly way.

I'll pay all pending legal costs.

I'll forgive the rent for last year.

I'll return the seized furniture to you,

but on one condition.
- Tell me.

You must commit to
leaving my house today.

OK?

I could,
and you know it better than me,

stay in your house
for who knows how long.

The new tenant must enter.

- He must!
- He must.

I could ask you a few thousand lire
as severance pay,

but this is blackmail
and I won't do it.

To show you that I am a gentleman,
I accept your proposal

and I promise you...
- Promise?!

You must commit yourself!
Please, sign this document.

OK.

Well, thank you.

We spent a year arguing,
instead we could get along.

Yes, fine.

Here.

Very well.
Don Carlo, you made a good deal.

Don Camillo,
we made a good deal.

NAPLES CHRONICLE

Don Carlo, do you want anything?

No, thank you, nothing.
I'm waiting for someone.

- A victim?
- That's it.

Here he is. Beat it.

Bring me a cappuccino.

My dear clerk!

Over here. Where are you looking?

How are you?

Long time no see.

I'm happy to see you.
Can I invite you to my table?

Please, sit down.

Our judicial clerk.

Give me, don't bother.

- Waiter?
- I'm here.

See what this gentleman wants.

I'll have an aperitif.
An aperitif?

I came to have a cappuccino.

Very good. A cappuccino, an aperitif
and two packs of cigarettes.

- Don't bother, I don't smoke.
- But I do.

- Hurry up.
- I'll bring them right over.

Were you going to court?

How can you shut yourself up
with a sun like this?

A heavenly day.

If I weren't here to find a house,
I'd go to the countryside.

Like last time.
What a nice lunch, remember?

Of course I do.

Oh, very good.

- Don Carlo, you're served.
- Thank you.

Sir, your cappuccino.

Cheers.

- You said you don't smoke, right?
- No.

Well...

Goodbye and thank you.

Forgive me,
but this is a bad day for me.

Thank you.

Annuccia!

Your father is outside
waiting for you.

He has a long face.

Maybe he made another mess
and doesn't know how to get out of it.

You're very envious and mean!

My father is not a fraud.

- Isn't he?
- Come on, everybody knows him.

- Let her go!
- I'll break your head!

My father is a gentleman. If he cheats,
it's because the world is evil.

Well, what's happening?
Get back to work!

You can go for today.
Your father told me he needs you.

- Me? Is something wrong?
- How should I know?

Please stop, Dad.
You're hiding something from me.

You know you can tell me everything.

You're worried and depressed.

Depressed? Not at all.

I'm planning, studying.

If you made me stop working,
there must be a reason. Tell me.

Nothing bad.
On the contrary, good news.

The landlord returned
our furniture to us.

We can take it away
whenever we want...

We have to take it away.
Annuccia, we're homeless.

Think what you want, I'm telling you
that your liver is damaged.

I can't be wrong about the disease
I've studied the most.

I have seen thousands
of sick people like you.

If you want my help,
I'm at your disposal.

I can't give you the prescription.

But you're lucky that
I'm coming to live in this building.

We'll arrange for my fee.
30, 40...we'll see...

But I'll tell you something
and in advance: get some treatment,

because your days are numbered.

- Me? My days are numbered?
- Yes.

Look who's talking, with that face.

You're the one who is going to die!

I'm in good health
and my liver feels better than me.

Go bring bad luck somewhere else!

What a foolish man.

Come on, cheers up.

I promise you
we'll have a home tonight.

I don't know how and where,
but adversity reveals genius.

The genius is there
and surely there's no lack of adversity,

so we'll also have a home.

- Oh!
- Carlo!

- Good morning.
- Hope you're well.

- Good morning.
- Hope you're well.

- What is it?
- I kept my word.

I quit that old stingy man
and, as you and I agreed, I'm here.

Until I find another job,
my wife and I will sleep in your house.

- What house?
- Your house.

But I just signed a paper
that forces me to leave my house today.

But it's a good thing
you got here,

so you can help us move.

- How much money do you have?
- I don't have a penny.

- Very good.
- And you? - Nothing.

So we'll keep each other company.

Let's go.

Don Carlo.

- Hey, Don Carlo!
- What do you want?

- How did it go?
- What?

Are you leaving this house or not?

- I am. - We are.
- It's about time.

- What?
- No, OK. Goodbye. - OK.

- Doorman?
- Yes, sir.

- Welcome, sir.
- Thanks.

- How are you?
- Fine, thank you.

The furniture will be here shortly.
Gimme the key, I'm going up for a look.

I don't have it because
the other tenant is still upstairs.

I don't know if...

But when does this end?!

The landlord has been making excuses
for four days.

This morning he assured me
that this house was available.

Go upstairs and tell them
they have to leave immediately.

- Wait a minute...Excuse me...
- Matilde.

- Matilde...
- Do I have to stay here until tomorrow?

Be patient for a moment, Matilde.

- Come on!
- OK.

Meanwhile, the lady can take a seat
in the porter's lodge.

- OK.
- I'm flying.

- Darling, will you get out of the car?
- OK.

Please, sit down.

- Is there anything to eat
in the kitchen? - No.

- Nothing?
- No.

How silly of me.
I have something to eat.

- Ah, very well.
- Don't worry.

Here it is, bread and sausage.

- We'll divide it into four equal parts.
- Good.

- For you. For you.
- Yes.

For me and for Carlo.

- The sausage.
- All right.

- Who could it be?
- Who else could it be? I'll get it.

Don't worry, eat.

Carlo can handle this alone.

What is it?

Dear Don Carlo,
the new tenant wants to enter.

First of all, take your cap off
in the presence of a gentleman.

Sorry, I hadn't noticed.

Besides, before you enter my house and
sit down, you must ask permission.

But I thought...

You don't have to think.
What do you want?

If you don't mind,
the new tenant wants to enter.

His furniture is coming.

- What time is it?
- What time is it...

It's 11. Almost noon.

- It's early.
- Early?

I have to hand over the keys
at midnight.

Until midnight this is my house.

- Beat it.
- Keep your hands off me.

- Because I can't...
- Get out of here! Beat it!

He won't listen.
I know him well.

He said he won't leave
before midnight.

Midnight?! He's crazy!

Did you see I was right?

What was I supposed to do?

The landlord assured me that he reached
an agreement with that scoundrel.

So what are we going to do?

What can we do...

Sit down and wait.

Here.

I'm fed up! This is a farce!

- Dear Don Carlo, you're harming me.
- Me?

Who told you that, this moron?

- Don't speak like that to me.
- I'll speak as I please.

Do you think
I wanted to harm his interests?

This gentleman. A friend of mine.

Please...Pasqualino.

It's better to clarify.
Please, come inside.

Pasqualino,
you know me well and you appreciate me.

Did I ever harm anyone's interests?

No, never.

Does anyone question that?

This jerk.

I told you before,
you have a bad liver.

Take care of yourself.
Your liver is this big.

You didn't let the new tenant
bring up his furniture.

Liar!
How could I forbid this?

But you told me
you weren't leaving before midnight.

- Yes, it's my right.
- Well?

I can't turn this house
into a furniture warehouse.

That's why I say
you're harming me.

You're turning the new tenant
against me.

I see I make a lot of things happen.
I didn't realize it.

- Did you?
- No.

And this beast told me nothing.

- But everything has a remedy.
- Thank God.

I'm willing to do anything for you.

- But under certain conditions.
- OK, I get it.

- How much?
- No, not from you. I couldn't.

You've already been very nice to me.

The new tenant has to pay me
for the damage.

- That's fair.
- Go down and talk to him.

- I'm willing.
- Let's go.

- Will you excuse me?
- Yes.

- Matilde! - Good morning.
Good morning, Commendatore.

- Good morning.
- I'm fed up!

- Commendatore, how are you?
- I'm fine, but you?

- What happened?
- Such things only happen in books.

You told me you were going
to get an apartment here,

but I hope it's not this one.

- Excuse me, I must speak
to the landlord. - Sure.

Excuse me.

- Are you the new tenant?
- Yes.

- You talk to him.
- Yes.

- I'm the previous tenant.
- Good.

- Nice to meet you.
- I'm afraid I can't say that.

We never met because I wasn't here
when you came to see the apartment.

- Well, let's find a solution.
- Easy, easy.

What are you doing here?
Go to your chicken coop!

- You may go.
- Go away!

Oh, our dear Commendatore,

and his lady.

- I guess you're the new tenant's wife.
- Exactly.

Glad to meet you and congratulations.

Let me do it.

While our Commendatore entertains
the ladies with his gentlemanly manner,

we'll talk a bit to find a solution.

- Yes.
- Very good.

Ma'am, there is a nice sofa.

Please, ma'am.

Please sit here, Commendatore.

Thank you.

Don Camillo, sit down here.
Don't stand.

This building is yours,
you should do the honors.

- Well?
- You're coming with me.

I don't envy your husband now.

He's gonna get fooled
by that trickster.

I hope he doesn't ask for much.

Don't exaggerate.

Your furniture is under cover.
Most of it is here.

We can bring the rest here in
two minutes, so rest easy.

So I'm not permitted
to bring my furniture into my house?

Wait, until midnight this is my house.

I should let you bring your furniture
into my house before the time,

before this house becomes yours?

Dear sir,
we have to make distinctions:

there are favors and favors,
permissions and permissions,

if you know what I mean.

Why don't we have a drink?

Ma'am, feel free to order
an orange soda or a drink.

I'd like an orange soda.
And you, my dear?

- Thanks, so would I.
- Don Camillo, same as me?

Are the porters at your disposal
for the whole day?

- They're my employees, at my disposal.
- And the carts too?

- Yes.
- Then there is no problem.

Your porters and carts
will move my furniture.

- Do you agree?
- Why didn't you say so?

I didn't know you
and what's good for you.

So, do we have a deal?

Don't worry.

He's been gone for just five minutes.
Nothing could have happened to him.

He'll be back,
because he always does.

Yes, but my dad has been finding excuses
for a year to appease the landlord.

The landlord got fed up
and won't forgive him anymore.

He threatened my father many times.

One day, the landlord
had the police call him.

What if he calls the cops
and they arrest him?

- Well, I'll go there now.
- Are you crazy?

If the landlord called the cops,

they'll arrest you too
and we'll be left alone.

Arrest me?
It takes a lot more than that.

- I'll go.
- Pasqualino!

Is the Commendatore offering?

- Sure. - Thanks, Commendatore.
- Don't mention it.

Water!

- Water!
- Who is he? - Pasqualino?

What's going on?

- What is it?
- I've had a hard time!

I hope the gentlemen will forgive me.

Easy!

Excuse me, this is my friend,
the well-known Dr. Sgueglia.

The new tenants.

- Mr. and Mrs. Strabotta.
- Nice to meet you.

You already know Don Camillo,
our landlord.

Are you a doctor?
I really need a doctor today.

I feel strange.

May I, Ma'am?
Excuse me.

Here I am.

My wife is happy
when she meets a doctor.

When she meets one...

Can I help you?

Oh, doctor, first of all, I suffer
from a terrible insomnia

that no sleeping pill
has been able to cure.

This insomnia has affected
my nervous system so much

that I can't bear
the slightest annoyance.

Actually, my real disease

should be, according to many
eminent doctors from all over Italy,

a very strong anemia that I suffered
in my early teens.

Now, listen to me, dear doctor,

there are three options:

I can either heal, cure insomnia again
or calm my nervous system.

There are different opinions,
but I've tried everything:

Neurovitina P4, Parapetofitina
and Peperetina PP.

- Even Pepper...Peperenzina...
- PP.

You're very funny. Come here.

Here.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Well...

Now that I know you,
I'd like to ask you something.

A little thing.

I always have a few thousand lire
with me.

- I was born rich and of good family.
- I see.

I usually give something to anyone
who does me a favor, a service.

I mean, a tip.

So, to the porters...

- You mean a "bottle"?
- The bottle too.

- I understand.
- Thank God, you're a smart man.

Please, don't bother, stay seated.
You're a little fat.

- How much?
- I wouldn't give less than 200 lire.

Anyway, do as you think,
but let's not make a bad impression.

- Do you need 200 lire?
- Not me, the porters.

I hope to be useful to you
some other time.

Hoping you'll ask for less.

Now that I know you
and I know where you live.

- I'll visit you often.
- Thanks, don't bother.

Ma'am, I don't know anything
about nervous diseases.

I'm Sgueglia, a liver specialist,
and people know it.

- But...
- Will you excuse me?

Excuse me.

- Thank you.
- Don't mention it.

- How'd it go?
- Very well.

- Will you excuse me? - Excuse me.
- Don't worry.

Bring me my other hat,
my blue suit and my gloves.

The gloves are essential.

Very good. Stop here.

Yes, I'm very charming.

You can go.

Excuse me, can you tell me
what you want to do?

All right, you want to learn.

Look...

The carts are downstairs
with my furniture.

I'll walk in front of the carts
and you behind.

I'll stop at the first sign
that says "for rent",

and I'll call the doorman
with a commanding tone.

Doorman!
What the hell kind of doorman are you?!

Is this the way to treat tenants?!

Gimme the key to the first,
second, third floor or whatever it is.

He will answer: what key?

Why, the landlord
didn't tell you anything?

I'll go to the police station.
I'll sue him!

For damages, expenses and interests.
Got it?

I paid three months in advance

and the landlord leaves me
on the street with my furniture?

I have a cold.
What if I get pneumonia?

- Damages, expenses...
- And interests. Attaboy.

If the doorman is smart,
he won't give me the key,

then we'll go on
until we find the right doorman.

Got it?

Dear Pasqualino, remember this:
genius is patience.

Let's go.

FOR RENT

Doorman.

Doorman!

What kind of doorman are you?!

Is this the way to treat tenants?!

Where's the key to the apartment
on the 3rd floor I rented?

So you're the new tenant?

- The landlord didn't tell you anything?
- No.

I paid three months in advance
and he didn't tell you anything.

He's rich.
He only thinks of women, he's young.

Don't worry, I'm here for you.

- Here are the keys.
- Hurry up!

Come on, let's go.

We've found the sucker.

Him.

Sir, if you have a pair of gloves,
even old ones, please remember me.

- I've always had this aspiration.
- Why?

Because when I go for a Sunday walk
with my wife...

Of course. I'll look in my stuff.

Unload my furniture
and take it upstairs. Hurry up.

- Take care of it.
- Yes.

Hey!
Hurry up, this gentleman can't wait!

# Oh that's nice
You give me so much love #

# Oh that's nice
You entered my heart #

Here.

Put it here, in the middle.

- Very well.
- There's nothing left downstairs.

- And if you're happy with it...
- I'm always happy.

Everything's OK, you can go.

- And the bottle?
- What bottle?

Oh, sure.
Pasqualino, give them a bottle.

- How many?
- Two.

A Chianti for you
and a Barolo for you.

But we meant a tip.

- A tip?
- Yes.

Your boss will give it to you.
He still owes me money.

You can go.

- Go! - What manners!
- It never happened to me!

Next time move the furniture yourself.

- May you live a hundred years
and in good health. - Thanks.

- Is this everything?
- Yes.

- Do you got a receipt?
- Yes, I got everything.

I mean the receipt from the landlord.
It's for the building manager.

The receipt from the landlord?

The receipt of the monthly
advance payments. Of course.

The receipt...

Ah! Pasqualino.

Did I give you the receipt
from the landlord?

Yes, you were trying to...

but Annuccia took it,
as she knows we're always distracted.

And Annuccia gave it to Olimpia.

No, I didn't get anything!
Keep me out of this.

What receipt?

Tomorrow, I'll find it calmly
and give it to you.

Tomorrow?
I'm sorry but I need it now.

Are you doubting my word?
Do you know who I am?

Dear sir, I know nothing.
I want the receipt.

I'll throw you out, for now.

I'll give it to you later,
when it suits me. Get out!

- You throw me out?
- Yes.

Yes, because I was too nice
to let you in.

I can't lose my job because of you.

Let me be clear,

either you give me the receipt now
or your furniture goes out of here!

And you with it!

You rascal!
Get out of my house right away!

- Take your hands off me!
- Get out!

Take your mouth off me
and watch your hands!

- Don't touch me!
- Take off your cap in my house!

- Beat it! - Take your mouth off me
and shut up your hands!

Don't touch me!

I'll fix you tomorrow!

I'll be a tougher cookie tomorrow
than now.

I won't move! Do you hear me?!

You rude scoundrel!

Who hired you in this building?
You fool!

He dared to enter my house
without taking off his cap,

as if he were a baron!

I'll teach you manners!

You're a bully! I'm doing my duty!

The burden of this building
is "adjusted" entirely on me.

I have to answer
to the building manager.

Look what they send to us!

And he also wears gloves...
This is the "finishing" of the world!

Your receipt!
I want to see your receipt!

I don't have to answer
to the doormen!

If you don't stop insulting me,
I'll come down and kick you!

- You kick me?
- Yes!

I'll rip out your heart
and eat it in slices!

- Go away!
- No, wait.

I don't want to ruin my reputation.
I'm going to call the landlord!

He'll take care of you!

Call whoever you want, you moron!

How can you all tolerate
such a thug in this palace?

But after all, he's a good man.

What?! He's a barbarian, a hoodlum!

That's his personality, but if you
get to know him, he's a good man.

He has no manners at all.

He must respect the tenants.

He may be disrespectful to others,
but not to me. I'll smash his face!

Now I've come to this palace.

The landlord is my friend
and I'll have him fired right away!

It's absurd that the first day
a gentleman comes to live in a house,

he must get so angry!

- Isn't this thing over yet?
- Yes, it is.

They finally realized
that I'm a tough nut to crack!

Keep your proper distance!

Bye, I'm going.

Please, my brother is sick.

I apologize.

Women, get in the house.

- Is your brother sick?
- For many years.

Well, I'm starting my round of visits
right now,

but I can take a look at him.

Doctor, but my brother...
I don't want to...

I know my duty.

Look...

You're sweating,
this can make you feel bad.

But Pasqualino says that if one
is sweaty, he has to drink a lot.

If Pasqualino says so, I won't drink.

I talked for an hour.

And there are people who say
that I don't work.

They're wrong.
Do you remember that time in Sorrento?

My poor mother was there too.

When we went on vacation.

That owner of the pension.

Oh, that...wretch.

Do you also go on vacation?

I take Annuccia to the seaside
every year.

Now the landlord is coming.
What will you do?

Well, what will I do?

Like I did with the owner
of the pension in Sorrento.

You know,
my brother is not an ordinary patient.

He's been suffering for many years
and his disease made him a misanthrope.

Last night he had a crisis
and I wouldn't...

Well, I'm not an ordinary doctor.

If your brother had a crisis,
so much the better.

This is the right time.

- Anacleto.
- Who is it?!

There's a young doctor here
to see you.

To see me? To visit me?

A visit...a medical visit.

Come in!

Please, get in.

Hey!
Where the hell are you going?

I'm Dr. Anacleto Paoloni.

- Doctor of medicine?
- That as well.

Don't you know who Dr. Paoloni is?

I...don't.

Young people no longer have
a love for science.

Where did you study?
Who were your teachers?

A...at the university.

At the univ...

At the university.

Sit down.

- But there is no...
- Sit down!

I would like to know why,
without knowing me,

you wanted to pay me a visit.

Maybe some colleague of mine sent you?

- In the hope that I was dead!
- No, no...

- You're a doctor. Doctor of medicine?

No, of...What's it called...pharmacy.

Chemist-pharmacist!

Almost...
I did two years of pharmacy.

You don't have a degree!

You're not a doctor!

- More or less...
- How dare you?!

Get out.

- Now?
- Get out!

- Get out!
- One moment.

Get out!

End of the First Half

Second Half

- Why did you let him in?
- Who could have expected this?

Such a distinguished person,
well-dressed and wearing gloves.

Wearing gloves?

So if a rascal came to your house
one day asking for your wallet,

you'd give it to him just because
he's wearing gloves.

No, but...

Mr. Enrico?

Mr. Enrico,
you were always busy...

...they had their furniture on a cart...
- Go to hell!

I'll fix everything now.

Be careful, sir. He's a bad guy.

If I didn't have the responsibility
of my job, I swear to you...

What do you want?

By what right did you get in here?

- Get out now!
- I'm attacked in my own home.

Assault and trespassing.
Help!

What assault and trespassing?!
I'm a gentleman.

I'd say no,
by the way you presented yourself.

- May I know who you are?
- I'm the owner of this house.

- I called him.
- Shut up!

I've a lot of scores to settle with you.

So you're the landlord?

Hogwash!

I repeat that I'm the owner
of this house.

- Really?
- Yes, really.

- It's a misunderstanding.
- What?!

You said a little while ago
that you made a deal with him,

and now you don't even recognize him,
but...

I told you to take off your cap.

It's going to end badly for you.

I apologize.
So you claim to be the landlord.

But there's a mistake, sir.

The owner of this house
is Don Ciccio Tartaglia,

a dear friend of mine for 30 years.

What are you saying?

I am the only owner of this house.

Like I said, there's a mistake.
That explains it all.

- No, you have to explain it to me!
- Don't yell, there are ladies inside.

If you don't mind listening to me,
I'll explain everything to you,

but this is not the best place
for a friendly explanation.

Please, come in.

Mrs. Olimpia Sgueglia,

wife of a dear friend of mine,
an eminent doctor.

- Nice to meet you.
- My daughter Annuccia.

This is Mr...Sorry, what's your name?

Enrico Sanni.

Nice to meet you, miss.

Shall we go?

- Please, sit down.
- He's a good-looking guy.

Yes, but nothing extraordinary.

What were we saying?

- Mr. Enrico, I'm talking to you.
- Tell me.

Yes.

If you don't look at me,
I feel like I'm not being heard.

No, I'm listening to you. Tell me.

Well, you said in the hall...
Nice fabric.

...that you own this house.
- Yes.

And as an owner
I think I've the right...

No, no.
You have no more right than this.

What? Don't I have the right
to know why you're in my house?

Without signing a lease
and without talking to me.

Without even knowing me!

- Want one?
- No, thanks.

A few months ago
I rented a house in Vomero.

Beautiful air, in the hills.

But yesterday, when I was about
to bring the furniture there,

I learned that there had been a death in
that house from an infectious epidemic.

I gave up the three months I had paid.

- Could I have taken my daughter there?
- Of course not.

Luckily I met my friend
Ciccio Tartaglia.

I told him the story:
"I happen to be without a house."

And he says to me: "That's it?"

"Go to my building,
in Via San Giuseppe, 15."

"I have a vacant apartment
on the third floor."

"Get the keys from the doorman."

"Then you'll pay me, if you want.
Otherwise, do as you please."

I didn't wait for him to tell me twice.

But I thought it was
in Via San Giuseppe dei Nudi.

Evidently, my friend meant
Via San Giuseppe near Corso Umberto I.

Coincidentally,
here in San Giuseppe dei Nudi,

at number 15, on the third floor,

there is a vacant apartment.

I asked for the key
and he gave it to me with his own hands.

What can I do now?

I'm here.
Of course, this house in not very good.

No offense.
It needs some restoration work.

But again with the porters, removals...

I can adapt myself.

I'll stay here and
we'll come to an agreement.

Excuse me,
but whom do I make a deal with?

Who are you? What's your job?

You're right.
I haven't introduced myself yet.

Carlo Mezzetti, businessman.

And now what do you want from me?

No, you have to tell me what you want.

I mean, since we introduced ourselves,
we can negotiate.

- Yes, but who assures me
that you are solvent? - Not me.

I can't be the one
to give you this information.

Get the information yourself
and think about it calmly.

We've got time. I won't be offended.
Then we'll see.

But...
you claim to be the landlord.

No, I have no objection,

but you must give me the documents
that prove you're the landlord.

I must know how and when
you came into possession of this house.

If someone gave it to you,
if you inherited it or bought it.

- I have to be sure.
- That's funny.

Now I have to show you how I became
the owner of this house?

- Yes.
- Me?

- Mr. Mezzetti, you're crazy.
- It's amazing.

If a man wants to follow the laws,
they call him crazy.

Dear sir, cautions are never enough.

I'm willing to negotiate and pay,
but to the rightful owner!

But the doorman
and all the tenants know me.

I don't know anyone,
all that matters is your documents.

Show me some documents and I'll pay!

This is something crazy.
You're turning the tables.

Now I have to give you guarantees?

- Go get the lawyer De Martino.
- What lawyer, he needs a psychiatrist.

No, wait. I'll go myself.

I'll send a bailiff to evict you.

I'll go to the police, I'll sue you.

I'll put you through hell,
he's my witness.

I'll teach you to cheat.
This is a real scam!

Watch your language.
You've insulted me in my house.

The doorman is my witness.
I'll sue you for defamation!

Mr. landlord,
I'll take the soles off your shoes!

Even that?

I'll show you who I am.
Cheater!

We'll finally settle our "discount!"

Doorman.

Doorman!

- Here I am.
- I'm the doctor they're waiting for.

- Who's they?
- The families.

- The families?
- That family.

- What family? - The patient's family.
Isn't there a sick man in this building?

No, everybody's fine.

Good morning.

Counselor, this is the man
who broke into my house illegally.

Wait a minute,
let's get this straight:

neither "broke into", nor "illegally".
I entered here,

after having lawfully received
the key from the doorman.

Well, don't you say anything?

I told you,
"gimme the key to the 3rd floor."

Isn't that right? Say yes or no.

- Yes, sir.
- See?

And I told you,
"I like this house, it suits me."

Yes or no?

- Yes, sir.
- See?

Did I steal the key or
did you give it to me spontaneously?

- Yes, but you made me believe...
- Say it to me.

Answer yes or no.

But...he was so well-dressed...
and his gloves!

Answer. Yes or no?!

- Yes, sir.
- See?

Now go away, we don't need you.

- What? He tells me what to do.
- Go away!

OK. But...

From what you heard,

you can realize
that I entered this house legally.

Yes, but just as you entered,
so you will go out.

- And who says that?
- For God's sake, I say so!

You? Who are you?

I'm attorney De Martino,
the landlord's lawyer,

and I'm allowed to do anything.
- But I don't know you.

Please, tell him.
Am I your lawyer or not?

Of course.
And he has full powers.

That's different.
You could've told me this before.

- He has full powers?
- Yes.

Please, sit down.

Can you show me the documents
that prove these full powers?

Dear sir, I might start by asking you
how did you become a lawyer.

Or where you got your degree.
But I won't.

Are you this gentleman's lawyer?
But who is he?

- Who is he?
- Is he the owner of this house?

That's what you say.
I need documents.

There is the receipt
of the property tax.

And there are all the tenants
who know him!

It's no use. Show me the original
documents and I'll pay.

You had a vacant apartment
and I made a mistake.

Instead of Via San Giuseppe at the Corso
I came to Via San Giuseppe dei Nudi.

I left a slice of heaven for this hovel.

You should be paying me.

You're lucky that I'm a gentleman.

Show me the original deeds
and I'll pay.

- I invite you to... - Thanks, I don't
have lunch with people I don't know.

What lunch?!

I formally invite you
to leave this house.

- Otherwise you force me
to take legal action. - Uh, how scary!

Do you think you're the only one
who knows the law?

I know it very well too.

A legal action is answered
by another legal action.

If you make one like this,
I'll make one like this.

- Yes? And I'll sue you in court!
- Do it.

Like cheese on macaroni.
I know exactly what to do.

Well, is it over?
Please, stop bothering me.

Get out of my house.

- This is a case of insanity.
- What insanity?

It's a scam!
But this time I'll fully commit myself.

We'll file a formal complaint.

We'll see you soon.
For lunch?

You'll see what's for dinner!

Counselor, do not harm my father.

I'll talk to him.
We'll leave this house immediately.

After the threats of the father,
comes the prayers of the daughter.

This is a well organized family.

Miss.

Annuccia, why are you like this?

I'm absolutely in the right.

Did you scare her?

Don't cry.
I've no intention of harming you.

Shall we go?

Poor girl.

Look, you go ahead.

I don't want to leave her in that
condition, with a father like that.

You'll lose everything because of women.

You brought me here to shame me.

OK, suit yourself.
I'll see you tomorrow.

And let's hope that gentleman
becomes more reasonable.

Good morning, young lady.

How rude.
He said goodbye to her but not to me.

Your lawyer has no tact, no skill.

How can he talk about a complaint?

My daughter got scared.

A complaint...
He thought he was gonna scare me?

What a mistake.

Now, calm down, Annuccia.
I assure you that everything is OK.

- Please, tell her.
- Yes, calm down, miss.

Cheer up. I don't want you
to feel bad because of me.

If you hadn't called the lawyer,

I wouldn't have asked you
for those documents.

You'd have made me some concessions
and I'd have paid.

I'm willing to make
every possible concessions to you.

Now you're speaking
like a reasonable man.

But do you really want
to stay in this house?

I'll not leave even with the police.

Well...all that remains
is to define the contract...

Yes, the contract...But it's late,
I have lunch at this time.

- I'm sorry. - It would be a pleasure
if you have lunch with us.

- No, I can't. Thank you.
- Yes. For us, it's a joy and an honor.

Annuccia, tell him.

- If you're not busy...
- No, I'm not busy.

He said yes.

Annuccia, get ready. Call Mrs. Olimpia,
so we'll leave together.

- Doorman.
- Yes, sir.

- I'm the doctor they're waiting for.
- Who's they?

The patient on the first, second,
third floor...I can't remember.

- Do you mean the third floor?
- Exactly.

Yes, poor guy. He just died.

Thanks a lot!

Let's wait for a bit.
Where could Pasqualino be?

Always Pasqualino.
You can't stay a moment without him.

Doorman.

- Doorman!
- Don Carlo, over here.

Where is he? What is he doing?

Doorman. Get up!

Yes, sir.

- When my friend the doctor comes...
- Pasqualino Sgueglia, my husband.

...tell him we're at the restaurant.
He knows the place.

Let's go, Annuccia. Please, Mr. Enrico.

At your service.

You dirty "arrogate" crook!

I'm the doctor they're waiting for.

- Third floor, apartment seven.
- Ah!

Good morning.

- I'm Doctor Sgueglia.
- Another doctor?

Here is the lady, talk to her

- Good morning, Ma'am.
- Good morning.

- I'm Sgueglia.
- Who is Sgueglia?

- I'm Doctor Sgueglia.
- Talk to my daughter.

Let's go there, this instrument is hot.

Excuse me, they told me to
talk to the daughter. Who is she?

- Who are you?
- I'm Doctor Sgueglia.

Talk to my brother. Here he is.

Come closer.

Come closer!

You had the courage to come here.

But I...

- It's hot!
- Do not move!

Dear Don Carlo, I have a family to feed.

What's past is past.
Let's forget about it.

But I warn you, if you don't give me
some money in advance,

I won't even put the glasses
on the table.

- You're always the same funny guy.
- Alright.

Here.

This is 150 lire.
Enough for five people,

including wine and tip.
- And what can I cook?!

Let me speak.
You're doing all the talking.

Look at that table.

Only my daughter has to eat well,

and that young man too.

The others are of no importance.
- OK.

Commendatore.

Counselor, my respects.

Remember, I spare no expense today.

Don't worry. Everything is OK.
I'll take care of the others.

Very good. Thank you.

I spoke to the innkeeper.

He'll make us a wonderful lunch.

You'll see.

Oh, dear clerk.

My respects.

Would you like to sit at our table?
You're there all alone. Come here.

Don't bother. Thank you.

Mrs. Olimpia, cheer up.
Are you thinking about Pasqualino?

Of course.

I've never seen a husband and wife
so close to each other.

It's nice to see two people
who love each other.

It's not a matter of loving
more or less.

Don't get funny with me.

Pasqualino went out for his house calls.
He hasn't eaten since yesterday.

What if he can't find us or is late?

We must seize the moment,
and you know it.

There he is. You can relax now.

Pasqualino.

Where have you been?
You waste your time every morning.

Please, don't joke.
This is not the time.

But your wife was worried.

Doctor Pasqualino Sgueglia.
Our dear landlord.

A man to respect and very open-minded.

Nice to meet you.

A liver specialist.

- Peace or armistice?
- Peace.

I've found a husband for my daughter.

What happened to your head?

No...A sun headache...
It started going, "Bang."

Ah, here are the macaroni!

Very good.

- For the lady.
- Thank you.

- But I don't drink much.
- I know.

- Your glass.
- Thanks, Don Carlo.

Why do you all eat so little?

Yes, we always do this.
We eat little and often.

Often little.

Little and often!

Little.

Another one? Don Enrico, you were
very kind to invite us here tonight.

Yes, indeed.
What a nice evening we're having.

- Drink up, Olimpia.
- Enough, I drink little.

I thank you for having the idea
of ending the evening in this way.

I didn't know this place.
Annuccia is happy too.

- Are you, Annuccia?
- Yes, Dad.

I hope you won't cry anymore.

- What a lovely music, Pasqualino.
- It's a tango.

- Shall we dance?
- Yes, Olimpia.

May I, Don Carlo?

- What?
- This dance.

I'm sorry but I never let my daughter
dance in a public dance-hall.

After all, we're here
and we're having fun anyway.

You, her...and me.

- Pasqualino.
- Olimpia.

My young master is here.

Good morning, Don Carlo.

Sorry if I see you here,
but I didn't want you to wait.

No, it doesn't matter.

- Do you have something to ask me?
- Yes.

First, I want to thank you for the
nice evening you offered us yesterday.

- We'll do it again, Don Carlo.
- Yes, we will.

See, a certain sympathy was born
between us.

- I dare not call it friendship.
- No, call it friendship.

No, don't take it lightly.

Friendship is a sacred thing.

I came here to tell you this:

I don't want to double cross you,

for a reason that you'll discover and
that you've probably already discovered.

I'm not an ordinary man.

That's why you made an opinion of me
that I'd like to cancel.

I'd like to stay in your house,

but I want to fulfill all my duties.

Why are you being so dramatic?

I want to make a contract honestly
and with sincerity: I have no money.

- Ah! - But I've serious intentions
of getting it from a job.

- I can pay you the first month
in 15 days. - Yes, OK.

I cannot pay more than 500 lire a month.

This isn't much.

But since we like each other,
500 lire is fine.

For two months in advance,
a check payable in 4 months.

No, it's not necessary.

I told you I want to make
a contract honestly.

I still have a few possessions.
You can seize my furniture.

My God, you don't have to worry,
not between us.

Tomorrow I'll come to you with my lawyer
and we'll sign the contract.

You don't think I'm sincere.
It's natural, the facts are against me.

- No.
- But if I stay in your house,

I'll show you that I'll keep
everything I promised.

Bye, Anna. See you in the morning.

Don't be afraid of me.

Look, he's young and handsome.

He loves you and will make you happy.

Better to be alone,
Dad would yell at me.

Hey, I'm so powerful
that I can make you invisible.

No obstacle can stop you.

I'll take care of your father.

And now I'll take care of you!

Call them now. No!

I've never wanted for anything.

An easy life, maybe too much.

That's why I don't feel happy.

I should've followed my aspirations:
living in the moment, as an artist.

I had a talent for painting.
I still paint.

- Do you?
- Yes.

On my own. Nothing extraordinary.

I wouldn't dare show you my paintings.
- Where do you have them?

Not at my father's house.
He wouldn't let me.

He lives only for practical things.

Think that I have to paint in secret.

So I got my own studio,
where I work

and where nobody must enter.
- Me neither?

- It's not worth it.
- Come on, show me your paintings.

But there are no paintings here.

We'll see the paintings another day.

Meanwhile, would you like a drink?

Oh Dad, it's you.

I can't sleep.

Pasqualino and his wife went to bed.

But if you want to sleep, I'll go.

I need to talk.

Whenever I had something here,
in my heart,

I used to talk to your mother.

Now I talk to you.
You were sad tonight.

- I noticed.
- No, I wasn't.

Yes, you were sad.

Why? Things are looking up.

I've decided to work.

I thought that a job, though modest...

I went to Enrico.

He's a good guy.

And he loves you, I can tell.

We're signing the contract tomorrow.

We have to get away from this house.

Annuccia, what's the matter?

We have to go!

What are you hiding from me?

He doesn't love me.

Did Enrico...

And you didn't slap him?
- I ran away.

"500 lire at month. Fine!"

"The first monthly payment in 15 days.
Very good!"

"A check after four months.
Don't worry."

I'll make you pay.

- Does it hurt so much?
- Very much.

Of course, the trauma was tremendous.

Damn those tiles!
It's your fault.

If this house was well kept up,
I wouldn't have fallen.

What a mess.
Doctor, you tell him, it's a mess.

It's a disaster. Two months to heal,
barring any complications.

Barring any complications.

Give me the contract to sign.

Do you still want to sign the contract?

Are you kidding?
I'm a serious man.

Look, Mezzetti,
we won't sign this contract.

I won't assist my client

to sign a contract all to his detriment
which would only bring him trouble.

Besides, the information about you
are bad.

So you'll have to leave.

Doctor, you're my witness.
He won't sign.

Then write a medical certificate,
'cause they want me to leave this house.

I must do my duty. Excuse me.

I know the law.

Damage caused to the tenant
due to poor condition of the house.

I fell and got hurt.

Where? In your house.

Why? Because the floor was broken.

Sure. Damage caused
by the floor in bad condition.

It's a clinician who tells you.

Is the floor really broken?

If I had had time to negotiate,

I'd have told the tenant to wait
a few days for renovations.

The landlord admits
that the floor is broken.

Take this down, doctor.

One moment, Dr. Squaglia.

Squaglia? It's Quaglia...Queglia...
Squeglia...Sgueglia!

Yes but, please, do not write.

I advise you to reach an agreement.

You got tricked,
but the fault is partly yours.

Hey, who got tricked?

Are you saying that I'm in league
with my friend, your tenant?

Don't you dare offend me.
This case is serious.

I didn't want to worry that poor wretch
because he has a daughter.

Carlo Mezzetti fell because of
the broken floor and got very hurt.

For this reason there are:
abrasion and displacement of the patella

with infiltrations into
the tissues of the leg.

Risk of acute synovitis

and probable deterioration
of the entire left leg.

How much money do I have to get?

- I suggest an arrangement.
- The contract first.

- Well, what should I do?
- What do you want to do now?

You've been a fool.
Give in and sign.

Congratulations, Don Carlo.
This is a nice blackmail.

You should have expected it.

Here.
We are finally sure to have a home.

Good, good, good.

Very good.

- What are you doing?!
- Leave it to me.

Don Enrico...

...now I'm the one who doesn't accept.

- What?!
- What more do you want?

I really don't understand you.

I could have claimed for damages
not to pay the rent for at least a year.

Does that surprise you?

Don Enrico, in Carlo Mezzetti's shop
there's no room for thieves.

I leave you the house.
You leave now, I'm leaving tomorrow.

Let us be clear:
I won't tolerate arguments with clients.

Wake up at 6:00 a.m.
Night shift, three times a week.

Maximum cleaning of the house and store.

What's your decision?

Clerk in this place.

Congratulations, sir,
you managed to kick them out.

We're all happy in this building.

With your permission,
I'm going to get "detoxicated."

Count it, it's 4000 lire.

But you were too hasty.

If you had told me,
you could've made more money.

It's not your business. Let's go.

Auction of valuable paintings
and antique furnishings

Carlo Mezzetti, the ace of the
auctioneers, will preside over the sale

I tried so many times in vain
to make him work here again.

Suddenly he came here yesterday
to get his job back.

Let's start with the sale…

of a magnificent and very rare
collector's item.

Starting price: 3000 lire.
Three bids minimum.

- He could sell a broken earthenware
as an Etruscan vase. - 3300...

...600...900.
4200...4500.

5000!

Come in.

This gentleman wants to see you.

He insisted a lot. I told him
that you usually rest at this hour.

You're probably tired,
you've been working all day.

Annuccia too. She just got home
from work and made lunch for her daddy.

I'm glad to have you in my house.

I hope you'll stay here a long time.

Donna Virginia, please,

if he insisted on seeing me,
it means that he must speak to me.

Yes, I'm going. Excuse me.

What do you want?

Look, you weren't able
to get me out of your house,

but I'm more than capable
of getting you out of mine.

Don Carlo, I won't move.

Look, I want to marry your daughter.

Yes, I want to marry Annuccia...

...if she still wants me.

And the apartment in Via San Giuseppe
dei Nudi is my wedding gift.

As for the furniture...

...I'll take care of it.

Magnificent dinner service, for 12,

made of Vienna porcelain,
with gilded motifs.

Starting price: 1000 lire.

Show it to the people here.

Show it to that young lady over there.
She's very interested.

It's an opportunity that
doesn't happen every day.

It's a great opportunity: 1000 lire.

1100? Sold.

A remarkable and useful
living room table,

in mahogany, with a lift top.

Starting price: 500.

600! Sold.

He must be crazy!

This crib is very modest,

but for a newly married couple,
it could be of great value.

Starting price...

...I'll buy it for 1000 lire.

It's my wedding gift to my daughter,

who is getting married tomorrow.

Is there anyone who'd like
to take it from her?

He gave me these.

Sold!

THE END