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1
00:00:47,025 --> 00:00:48,592
They don't feed you
here, you know.
2
00:00:48,792 --> 00:00:50,463
People are going to
think I'm anorexic.
3
00:00:50,663 --> 00:00:53,118
I've had 6 tests
and a-hi, Morgan.
4
00:00:53,318 --> 00:00:55,730
How you doing?
That's Morgan.
5
00:01:00,386 --> 00:01:01,170
Hello?
6
00:01:01,370 --> 00:01:02,127
Woman: Hello.
7
00:01:02,327 --> 00:01:03,781
Oh. Yo, Frankie.
8
00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:05,478
Hello? Hello?
9
00:01:05,678 --> 00:01:06,349
Hello.
10
00:01:06,549 --> 00:01:07,829
Morgan? Morgan,
is that you?
11
00:01:08,029 --> 00:01:09,787
Mom! Hi, mom.
12
00:01:09,987 --> 00:01:10,875
Awfully sorry,
darling.
13
00:01:11,075 --> 00:01:12,181
There's a change
in our schedule.
14
00:01:12,381 --> 00:01:13,356
Your father and I
have to tape
15
00:01:13,556 --> 00:01:15,184
the Phil donahue show,
so I'm afraid
16
00:01:15,384 --> 00:01:18,100
we'll have to scratch
Thanksgiving.
17
00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:19,144
Ok.
18
00:01:19,344 --> 00:01:20,145
Maybema,
next year-you know,
19
00:01:20,345 --> 00:01:21,146
what's Thanksgiving?
You sit around
20
00:01:21,346 --> 00:01:23,018
eating leftover
Turkey for 4 days.
21
00:01:23,218 --> 00:01:24,062
Donahue people need
22
00:01:24,262 --> 00:01:25,847
a republican senator
and his wife
23
00:01:26,047 --> 00:01:27,500
for a show
on marital stress.
24
00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:29,241
But I'll see you
at Christmas, right?
25
00:01:29,441 --> 00:01:30,678
Well, unfortunately,
darling,
26
00:01:30,878 --> 00:01:34,072
politics demand we spend
a week in The Bahamas.
27
00:01:34,272 --> 00:01:35,204
How come?
28
00:01:35,404 --> 00:01:36,684
How come? Your father
needs a good rest.
29
00:01:36,884 --> 00:01:38,642
Oh, you're not
too disappointed, are you?
30
00:01:38,842 --> 00:01:40,557
No. No, it's-it's-
31
00:01:40,757 --> 00:01:42,080
I know daddy
works hard. I know.
32
00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:43,995
Veryhard.
I know.
33
00:01:44,195 --> 00:01:45,127
You have no idea,
34
00:01:45,327 --> 00:01:47,085
the stress and strain
a senator endures.
35
00:01:47,285 --> 00:01:48,478
So, uh,
so easter, right?
36
00:01:48,678 --> 00:01:49,653
Have you been
eating meat?
37
00:01:49,853 --> 00:01:51,220
You sound depressed.
You ok?
38
00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:53,526
Yeah. No,
I'm really-i'm-
39
00:01:53,726 --> 00:01:54,440
you sure?
40
00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:56,094
No, I'm fine.
I really-i am.
41
00:01:56,294 --> 00:01:56,965
I'm ok.
42
00:01:57,165 --> 00:01:58,923
Well, ok.
See you at easter.
43
00:01:59,123 --> 00:01:59,837
Yeah. Easter.
44
00:02:00,037 --> 00:02:01,186
Uh-huh. Looking
forward to it.
45
00:02:01,386 --> 00:02:02,057
Definitely.
46
00:02:02,257 --> 00:02:03,014
Got to go.
Ok.
47
00:02:03,214 --> 00:02:04,233
Happy Thanksgiving.
48
00:02:04,433 --> 00:02:05,669
Bye, mom.
49
00:02:16,245 --> 00:02:20,553
Captioning made possible by
trimark home video
50
00:02:20,753 --> 00:02:24,296
♪ I'm walking home
in the rain ♪
51
00:02:24,496 --> 00:02:26,647
♪ the blood runs cold
in my vein... ♪
52
00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:28,431
Your parents
ditched you again,
53
00:02:28,631 --> 00:02:29,562
huh, Stewart?
54
00:02:29,762 --> 00:02:30,476
Too bad.
55
00:02:30,676 --> 00:02:32,478
Guess that means
Turkey dinner
56
00:02:32,678 --> 00:02:35,481
with jomo and
mahatma, huh?
57
00:02:35,681 --> 00:02:37,309
What are you talking
about, dickweed?
58
00:02:37,509 --> 00:02:39,572
I'm going home
this weekend.
59
00:02:39,772 --> 00:02:41,531
You lie, Stewart.
60
00:02:41,731 --> 00:02:42,793
Ha ha ha!
61
00:02:42,993 --> 00:02:45,970
If he were my kid,
I wouldn't want him either.
62
00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:52,673
♪ The moon is blue
63
00:02:57,112 --> 00:02:58,200
you sure?
64
00:02:58,400 --> 00:02:59,244
Garrett, my parents
65
00:02:59,444 --> 00:03:00,681
are going to show up
any second now.
66
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:03,031
They're just running
a little late.
67
00:03:03,231 --> 00:03:05,642
M-My mom says it wouldn't
be like a holiday
68
00:03:05,842 --> 00:03:06,730
without you at our house.
69
00:03:06,930 --> 00:03:10,734
Garrett, have a nice
Thanksgiving, ok?
70
00:03:10,934 --> 00:03:12,562
They're waiting for me.
71
00:03:12,762 --> 00:03:14,303
So long.
72
00:03:14,503 --> 00:03:15,478
Bye-bye.
73
00:03:15,678 --> 00:03:18,960
♪ So the angels say
74
00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:22,746
♪ running to the rescue
75
00:03:22,946 --> 00:03:26,532
♪ angels flying
up above ♪
76
00:03:26,732 --> 00:03:30,406
♪ phantoms in the bay
77
00:03:30,606 --> 00:03:34,236
♪ while the natives pray
78
00:03:34,436 --> 00:03:37,065
♪ to the painted moon
79
00:03:37,265 --> 00:03:41,112
♪ I wash my face
and get dressed ♪
80
00:03:41,312 --> 00:03:44,637
♪ the time cuts
into my rest ♪
81
00:03:44,837 --> 00:03:48,641
♪ so who
invents our dreams? ♪
82
00:03:48,841 --> 00:03:53,037
♪ The hands
that hold the machine ♪
83
00:03:53,646 --> 00:03:57,128
♪ the moon is blue
84
00:03:57,389 --> 00:04:01,393
♪ the moon is cool...
85
00:04:01,593 --> 00:04:03,308
Squanto and samoset.
86
00:04:03,508 --> 00:04:04,527
How! How!
87
00:04:04,727 --> 00:04:05,833
Greg Brady: The Indians
amazed the pilgrims
88
00:04:06,033 --> 00:04:07,704
by speaking some English,
89
00:04:07,904 --> 00:04:09,619
and the pilgrims made
friends with the Indians
90
00:04:09,819 --> 00:04:11,752
and invited them to a feast.
91
00:04:12,970 --> 00:04:14,493
First they gave thanks
for safely reaching
92
00:04:14,693 --> 00:04:16,147
the new world,
93
00:04:16,347 --> 00:04:17,018
then they ate.
94
00:04:17,218 --> 00:04:18,802
♪ So the angels say
95
00:04:20,456 --> 00:04:24,242
♪ Running to the rescue
96
00:04:24,442 --> 00:04:27,898
♪ angels flying
up above ♪
97
00:04:28,098 --> 00:04:31,510
♪ phantoms in the bay
98
00:04:40,302 --> 00:04:43,218
Ok, let's do it.
99
00:04:51,704 --> 00:04:53,271
Come on, hurry up!
100
00:05:06,937 --> 00:05:08,243
Go!
101
00:05:32,702 --> 00:05:35,400
Let's get out of here.
102
00:06:06,388 --> 00:06:07,563
Gentlemen,
I think we're talking
103
00:06:07,763 --> 00:06:10,566
the nobel prize
for revenge.
104
00:06:46,036 --> 00:06:47,733
We did it!
Yay!Yay!
105
00:06:47,933 --> 00:06:49,605
We did it!
We did it!
106
00:06:49,805 --> 00:06:54,436
We did it! We did it!
107
00:06:56,046 --> 00:06:58,266
We didn't do it.
108
00:07:01,486 --> 00:07:03,227
Me?
109
00:07:04,881 --> 00:07:06,317
Oh...
110
00:07:09,538 --> 00:07:11,366
How did it go?
111
00:07:11,566 --> 00:07:13,324
Bad.
112
00:07:13,524 --> 00:07:14,108
Real bad.
113
00:07:14,308 --> 00:07:17,024
Um, I'm going home.
114
00:07:17,224 --> 00:07:17,938
They can't
do that.
115
00:07:18,138 --> 00:07:19,200
They can't just
kick you out.
116
00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:22,290
No, no. They-they
didn't kick me out.
117
00:07:22,490 --> 00:07:24,074
My, uh, my parents
118
00:07:24,274 --> 00:07:25,032
called Mr. Smythe
this morning,
119
00:07:25,232 --> 00:07:28,209
and...they want me
to come home.
120
00:07:28,409 --> 00:07:29,819
He got kicked out.
121
00:07:30,019 --> 00:07:31,603
This is all a desperate
rationalization.
122
00:07:31,803 --> 00:07:34,041
Go ask Mr. Smythe
yourself.
123
00:07:34,241 --> 00:07:35,477
It's the truth.
124
00:07:35,677 --> 00:07:39,350
They want me to come home
and live with them.
125
00:07:40,090 --> 00:07:42,397
Yeah, but you've never
really lived at home.
126
00:07:42,597 --> 00:07:45,008
Sure, I did. I lived
at home till I was 10.
127
00:07:45,208 --> 00:07:45,878
It was great.
128
00:07:46,078 --> 00:07:47,228
But that was
all 7 years ago.
129
00:07:47,428 --> 00:07:48,969
Well, sure, we've been
a little out of touch
130
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:51,319
but nothing
that can't be remedied.
131
00:07:51,519 --> 00:07:55,018
Garrett, they called me.
I did not call them.
132
00:07:55,218 --> 00:07:56,280
They want me
to come home.
133
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:57,716
I mean,
I'm going to have
134
00:07:57,916 --> 00:08:00,110
my own kitchen
that never closes,
135
00:08:00,310 --> 00:08:01,024
my own room,
136
00:08:01,224 --> 00:08:03,157
i'm-it's going
to be so cool.
137
00:08:11,948 --> 00:08:15,256
Well, prison life
sure won't be the same
138
00:08:15,456 --> 00:08:16,083
without you.
139
00:08:16,283 --> 00:08:17,301
Garrett, old buddy,
140
00:08:17,501 --> 00:08:20,435
I had it tuned,
gassed up, and ready to go.
141
00:08:20,635 --> 00:08:22,524
It's all yours.
142
00:08:22,724 --> 00:08:24,047
Wow, man, I can't.
143
00:08:24,247 --> 00:08:27,746
Not your Texas chainsaw
massacrechainsaw
144
00:08:27,946 --> 00:08:29,705
with tobe hooper's
autograph.
145
00:08:29,905 --> 00:08:31,620
No. I want you
to have it.
146
00:08:31,820 --> 00:08:33,230
No, seriously, I can't.
147
00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:34,405
I appreciate it,
but, I mean,
148
00:08:34,605 --> 00:08:37,278
this is the Mona Lisa
of your collection.
149
00:08:37,478 --> 00:08:40,020
I couldn't take it.
150
00:08:43,849 --> 00:08:46,939
Oh, uh, Roger, I'll just be
a few minutes, ok?
151
00:08:47,139 --> 00:08:49,029
Keep it warm.
152
00:08:51,074 --> 00:08:52,162
Hello, boys.
153
00:08:52,362 --> 00:08:53,511
Hi.
154
00:09:00,997 --> 00:09:02,216
You sure?
155
00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:03,478
I mean,
that's the only film
156
00:09:03,678 --> 00:09:05,088
that Hitchcock
ever did in 3-d.
157
00:09:05,288 --> 00:09:06,611
Garrett, you want it,
it's yours,
158
00:09:06,811 --> 00:09:08,874
but please
take good care of it.
159
00:09:10,485 --> 00:09:12,008
Well, better
hit the showers.
160
00:09:12,208 --> 00:09:13,879
My mom will be here
any second.
161
00:09:14,079 --> 00:09:16,143
Oh, no.
I got paint detail.
162
00:09:16,343 --> 00:09:17,318
Wait. The hydrants?
163
00:09:17,518 --> 00:09:19,233
No. The curbs
this time.
164
00:09:19,433 --> 00:09:21,104
Well, it could be worse.
165
00:09:21,304 --> 00:09:23,106
You think so?
166
00:09:23,306 --> 00:09:24,064
Well,
it'll only take US
167
00:09:24,264 --> 00:09:26,109
about 3 or 4 years
this time.
168
00:09:26,309 --> 00:09:27,545
Ha ha!
169
00:09:27,745 --> 00:09:30,200
I'll be right back, ok?
170
00:09:31,462 --> 00:09:32,942
See you later, baby.
171
00:09:33,142 --> 00:09:35,075
I got to work.
172
00:09:45,172 --> 00:09:46,651
Oh, my god.
173
00:09:49,959 --> 00:09:51,352
You're not my son.
174
00:09:51,552 --> 00:09:52,788
No, ma'am.
175
00:09:52,988 --> 00:09:56,052
He's-he's
taking a shower.
176
00:10:03,842 --> 00:10:05,757
...hot water
over there?
177
00:10:05,957 --> 00:10:07,237
Incoming!
178
00:10:07,437 --> 00:10:09,326
Oh. Boy, you ok?
179
00:10:10,284 --> 00:10:12,938
Morgan?
180
00:10:14,984 --> 00:10:17,291
Morgan?
181
00:10:17,491 --> 00:10:18,857
Hi.
182
00:10:19,336 --> 00:10:20,250
Mom?
183
00:10:20,450 --> 00:10:21,991
Morgan?
184
00:10:22,191 --> 00:10:24,385
Mom?
185
00:10:24,585 --> 00:10:26,169
Mom.
186
00:10:26,369 --> 00:10:27,605
Morgan?
187
00:10:29,651 --> 00:10:31,348
Mom!
188
00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:33,785
Morgan!
189
00:10:33,985 --> 00:10:36,092
You-you've-
190
00:10:36,292 --> 00:10:38,529
y-you look good, mom!
191
00:10:38,729 --> 00:10:39,400
Mom.
192
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,837
Mom. Uh...
193
00:10:42,037 --> 00:10:44,013
Sounds ethnic.
194
00:10:44,213 --> 00:10:45,319
Well,
hurry up, dear.
195
00:10:45,519 --> 00:10:47,495
Pilot's
waiting.
196
00:10:51,803 --> 00:10:53,936
Sorry, guys.
197
00:11:14,957 --> 00:11:16,915
Heh heh!
198
00:11:22,747 --> 00:11:26,360
Morgan: Mom, I'm real
excited about going home.
199
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:27,535
Uh, by the way,
200
00:11:27,735 --> 00:11:29,232
where do we live
these days?
201
00:11:29,432 --> 00:11:30,451
Mom: Washington.
202
00:11:30,651 --> 00:11:33,628
We're always in Washington
this time of year.
203
00:11:44,029 --> 00:11:46,423
Ahh, shit!
204
00:11:48,382 --> 00:11:49,513
Morgan,
205
00:11:49,713 --> 00:11:51,428
I'm off to
the hairdresser's.
206
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:54,039
Make yourself
at home, darling.
207
00:12:30,424 --> 00:12:32,426
I'm home!
208
00:12:36,038 --> 00:12:37,779
Dad?
209
00:12:37,979 --> 00:12:40,216
Dad! I'm home!
210
00:12:41,217 --> 00:12:43,219
Dad...
211
00:12:44,351 --> 00:12:46,135
Whoa.
212
00:12:59,366 --> 00:13:00,454
Whoa!
213
00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:04,675
This must be where
they keep the iguanas.
214
00:13:08,549 --> 00:13:10,246
Hello?
215
00:13:11,508 --> 00:13:13,031
Anybody home?
216
00:13:17,558 --> 00:13:18,689
Huh!
217
00:13:18,889 --> 00:13:20,343
Food processor!
218
00:13:20,543 --> 00:13:21,344
Damn you!
219
00:13:21,544 --> 00:13:23,041
No knife!
220
00:13:25,957 --> 00:13:27,219
Oh!
221
00:13:27,419 --> 00:13:29,570
Look,
is very easy.
222
00:13:32,355 --> 00:13:34,139
Ah! Ha ha ha!
223
00:13:34,339 --> 00:13:38,187
Beautiful, huh?
No knife.
224
00:13:38,387 --> 00:13:40,320
You cavewoman.
225
00:13:41,495 --> 00:13:43,192
Cavewoman!
226
00:13:46,456 --> 00:13:48,110
We in america now!
227
00:13:48,310 --> 00:13:49,285
Free country! Huh!
228
00:13:49,485 --> 00:13:52,854
I smoke when I want
and where I want.
229
00:13:53,054 --> 00:13:54,290
Hi. I'm Morgan.
230
00:13:54,490 --> 00:13:56,031
I think I live here.
231
00:13:56,231 --> 00:13:57,337
Oh. Ha ha!
232
00:13:57,537 --> 00:13:58,250
Welcome
to the kitchen
233
00:13:58,450 --> 00:14:00,775
of your home,
young master.
234
00:14:00,975 --> 00:14:01,689
Ahem!
235
00:14:01,889 --> 00:14:04,169
Allow me to
interrupt myself.
236
00:14:04,369 --> 00:14:06,607
I am Ivan
illych vinnikov.
237
00:14:06,807 --> 00:14:08,391
Hello, Ivan.
Hello.
238
00:14:08,591 --> 00:14:09,305
And my wife,
239
00:14:09,505 --> 00:14:12,439
proskovia fyodorovna
vinnikova.
240
00:14:12,639 --> 00:14:13,222
Huh?
241
00:14:13,422 --> 00:14:15,485
How you doing,
proskovia?
242
00:14:21,665 --> 00:14:24,059
Uh, thank you.
243
00:14:24,259 --> 00:14:26,627
Uh, uh, perhaps
the young master
244
00:14:26,827 --> 00:14:29,760
would like to be
carried to his room?
245
00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:31,849
Sure. I don't see
why not.
246
00:14:32,049 --> 00:14:32,633
Uh, certainly.
247
00:14:32,833 --> 00:14:35,113
If you would be so good,
248
00:14:35,313 --> 00:14:36,811
follow me.
249
00:14:37,011 --> 00:14:38,465
No. After you.
250
00:14:38,665 --> 00:14:40,989
Go ahead.
251
00:14:45,254 --> 00:14:47,387
Unh!
252
00:14:48,431 --> 00:14:50,738
Welcome!
253
00:14:59,050 --> 00:15:01,052
Well...
254
00:15:01,252 --> 00:15:04,055
It's definitely me.
It's, uh...
255
00:15:04,255 --> 00:15:06,449
You know, I always wanted
a cozy little room
256
00:15:06,649 --> 00:15:07,885
that could sleep 50.
257
00:15:08,085 --> 00:15:08,886
Because, you know,
258
00:15:09,086 --> 00:15:10,453
the rockettes
usually stay with me
259
00:15:10,653 --> 00:15:12,150
when they're in town.
260
00:15:12,350 --> 00:15:13,500
There.
261
00:15:13,700 --> 00:15:14,675
At last.
262
00:15:14,875 --> 00:15:18,548
The ultimate den
of iniquity-quity-quity...
263
00:15:19,506 --> 00:15:21,072
Ok...
264
00:15:22,900 --> 00:15:25,860
You guys
go in the bathroom.
265
00:15:31,561 --> 00:15:35,260
Home is where
the heart is. Ha ha!
266
00:15:41,136 --> 00:15:42,833
Hmm...
267
00:15:46,533 --> 00:15:47,708
Now, senator,
there are
268
00:15:47,908 --> 00:15:49,797
many different ways
to use this...
269
00:15:49,997 --> 00:15:50,885
Hey!
270
00:15:51,085 --> 00:15:51,842
I don't think
oglethorpe's endorsement
271
00:15:52,042 --> 00:15:53,235
is going to make
any difference-
272
00:15:53,435 --> 00:15:54,149
senator!
273
00:15:54,349 --> 00:15:56,673
What-whoa!
274
00:15:58,893 --> 00:16:00,068
No! Wait!
275
00:16:00,268 --> 00:16:01,504
Hold it! Stop!
276
00:16:01,704 --> 00:16:02,418
It's ok.
277
00:16:02,618 --> 00:16:04,246
It's all right.
278
00:16:04,446 --> 00:16:05,465
Hi, dad.
279
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:07,336
Gentlemen,
280
00:16:07,536 --> 00:16:08,424
this is my son.
281
00:16:08,624 --> 00:16:10,426
Oh...it's all right,
hooks. Good work.
282
00:16:10,626 --> 00:16:11,906
How are you?
I'm Jay.
283
00:16:12,106 --> 00:16:14,169
I'm the senator's
new executive aide.
284
00:16:14,369 --> 00:16:15,083
I'm-i'm...
285
00:16:15,283 --> 00:16:16,388
I'm awfully sorry
about this,
286
00:16:16,588 --> 00:16:17,912
but these are
violent times,
287
00:16:18,112 --> 00:16:19,348
you know?
It's ok.
288
00:16:19,548 --> 00:16:20,218
No harm done.
289
00:16:20,418 --> 00:16:21,568
I-i can't begin
to tell you
290
00:16:21,768 --> 00:16:23,439
how much I appreciate
your coming home.
291
00:16:23,639 --> 00:16:25,354
Well, I'm glad
to be here, dad.
292
00:16:25,554 --> 00:16:26,181
Senator!
293
00:16:26,381 --> 00:16:27,965
It is telephone.
Important.
294
00:16:28,165 --> 00:16:29,532
I'll be
right there, Ivan.
295
00:16:29,732 --> 00:16:30,533
I'm awfully sorry-
296
00:16:30,733 --> 00:16:31,534
it's ok. It's ok.
297
00:16:31,734 --> 00:16:33,884
We'll catch up later, ok?
298
00:16:34,537 --> 00:16:36,017
There's something
different about you.
299
00:16:36,217 --> 00:16:37,148
I don't know
what it is.
300
00:16:37,348 --> 00:16:39,194
Uh, well, I've
grown about 4 inches
301
00:16:39,394 --> 00:16:40,543
since last time
I saw you.
302
00:16:40,743 --> 00:16:42,240
I think that's it.
303
00:16:44,112 --> 00:16:45,417
Marshall...
304
00:16:45,617 --> 00:16:46,680
Uh, it's Morgan.
305
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:47,463
Whatever.
306
00:16:47,663 --> 00:16:48,856
On behalf
of the senator
307
00:16:49,056 --> 00:16:50,379
and the entire
staff,
308
00:16:50,579 --> 00:16:51,554
I want to
welcome you home.
309
00:16:51,754 --> 00:16:53,687
Great. This is
a great house.
310
00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:55,036
Oh, thank you,
thank you.
311
00:16:55,236 --> 00:16:57,081
I picked it out
for 'em myself.
312
00:16:57,281 --> 00:16:58,430
How long
have we lived here?
313
00:16:58,630 --> 00:17:00,084
We're going
to cover that
314
00:17:00,284 --> 00:17:02,522
in the briefing,
my boy.
315
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:04,872
Briefing?
316
00:17:07,701 --> 00:17:08,919
Jay: Thelma daggett
317
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:11,400
is a nationally acclaimed
attorney, educator.
318
00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:13,576
She's a pioneer in
the civil rights movement,
319
00:17:13,776 --> 00:17:16,710
she's been compared
to Eleanor Roosevelt,
320
00:17:16,910 --> 00:17:19,713
mother Theresa, and
Florence nightingale.
321
00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:20,627
Ha!
322
00:17:20,827 --> 00:17:21,845
Well...
323
00:17:22,045 --> 00:17:24,805
She sounds like
she'd make a great senator.
324
00:17:25,005 --> 00:17:27,764
So would Santa claus
and the tooth fairy.
325
00:17:27,964 --> 00:17:28,809
Um, no, Morgan.
326
00:17:29,009 --> 00:17:30,375
She's too good
for office.
327
00:17:30,575 --> 00:17:31,376
She wouldn't fit in.
328
00:17:31,576 --> 00:17:32,639
There's no room
in the senate
329
00:17:32,839 --> 00:17:35,685
for a goody-goody
intellectual humanitarian.
330
00:17:35,885 --> 00:17:37,861
She'd stick out
like a sore thumb.
331
00:17:38,061 --> 00:17:39,776
If I may continue,
332
00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:43,432
we're behind in
the polls, Morgan.
333
00:17:43,632 --> 00:17:47,349
Now is the time
for a new strategy.
334
00:17:47,741 --> 00:17:49,307
See, all
we have to do
335
00:17:49,507 --> 00:17:50,439
is present
the voters
336
00:17:50,639 --> 00:17:54,095
with a simple,
obvious choice.
337
00:17:54,295 --> 00:17:57,664
A lonely,
pathetic spinster...
338
00:17:58,708 --> 00:18:00,362
Or Tom Stewart,
339
00:18:00,562 --> 00:18:04,366
just your average
American family man.
340
00:18:04,566 --> 00:18:06,673
Vote for the family.
341
00:18:06,873 --> 00:18:08,413
That's it.
342
00:18:09,458 --> 00:18:10,720
Now,
that's exactly how
343
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:12,679
we're going to win.
344
00:18:14,898 --> 00:18:17,509
That's
your schedule.
345
00:18:17,709 --> 00:18:18,989
You'll represent
the senator.
346
00:18:19,189 --> 00:18:21,818
You're our little
ace in the hole,
347
00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:23,211
buddy.
348
00:18:25,996 --> 00:18:27,215
Mom:
I've been thinking
349
00:18:27,415 --> 00:18:29,260
about your political
future, Morgan.
350
00:18:29,460 --> 00:18:31,088
Mom, I'm not even
old enough to vote yet.
351
00:18:31,288 --> 00:18:32,742
Yet you're old
enough to date...
352
00:18:32,942 --> 00:18:34,526
The right girls,
of course.
353
00:18:34,726 --> 00:18:35,702
I don't know.
354
00:18:35,902 --> 00:18:37,834
I hear the wrong girls
can be a lot of fun.
355
00:18:39,227 --> 00:18:40,402
You see, mom,
356
00:18:40,602 --> 00:18:41,751
people just-people
just don't date anymore.
357
00:18:41,951 --> 00:18:43,710
They just-you know,
they go out to the movies,
358
00:18:43,910 --> 00:18:45,668
and then
they sleep together.
359
00:18:45,868 --> 00:18:47,148
Oh, please.
360
00:18:47,348 --> 00:18:49,324
Spare me your
locker-room humor,
361
00:18:49,524 --> 00:18:50,499
both of you.
362
00:18:50,699 --> 00:18:52,022
The right woman
can make or break
363
00:18:52,222 --> 00:18:53,371
a man's
political career,
364
00:18:53,571 --> 00:18:55,330
so your dating
the right girl
365
00:18:55,530 --> 00:18:56,810
can make
a crucial difference
366
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:57,854
to your father's
campaign
367
00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:00,204
as well as proving
a valuable asset
368
00:19:00,404 --> 00:19:01,423
to your future.
369
00:19:01,623 --> 00:19:03,425
That's true, you know.
I always wanted a girl
370
00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:05,645
with a good asset.
371
00:19:09,561 --> 00:19:11,302
Women hold
the slender thread
372
00:19:11,502 --> 00:19:13,783
that all civilization
hangs from.
373
00:19:13,983 --> 00:19:16,525
They lead men
to greatness.
374
00:19:16,725 --> 00:19:18,919
I have just the girl
for you.
375
00:19:19,119 --> 00:19:20,660
Good. Good.
376
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:21,486
I, uh...
377
00:19:21,686 --> 00:19:22,966
I can't wait
to meet her.
378
00:19:23,166 --> 00:19:25,403
Be sure to smile.
379
00:19:27,449 --> 00:19:28,842
Here he comes.Senator!
Senator, this way!
380
00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:31,366
Wait,here's
wait-your shot-
381
00:19:31,566 --> 00:19:32,454
look this way, sir!
382
00:19:32,654 --> 00:19:33,673
This way,
senator!
383
00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:34,891
Isn't it unusual
384
00:19:35,091 --> 00:19:36,327
that an incumbent
like yourself
385
00:19:36,527 --> 00:19:38,329
should be this far
behind in the polls
386
00:19:38,529 --> 00:19:40,114
this early
in the game?
387
00:19:40,314 --> 00:19:42,159
As I recall, Dewey
had Truman beat
388
00:19:42,359 --> 00:19:43,421
in all the polls,
389
00:19:43,621 --> 00:19:45,206
but Truman
still got elected.
390
00:19:45,406 --> 00:19:46,511
Then you're
not concerned
391
00:19:46,711 --> 00:19:48,905
by Thelma daggett's
popularity?
392
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:50,167
I'm going to
make my stand
393
00:19:50,367 --> 00:19:52,126
on the American family
because I believe
394
00:19:52,326 --> 00:19:54,911
that's the most important
issue we've got.
395
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:55,912
Thank you.
396
00:19:57,044 --> 00:19:58,349
Thank you very much.
Excuse US, folks.
397
00:19:58,549 --> 00:20:00,917
They're Denver oil money,
they're moral majority,
398
00:20:01,117 --> 00:20:02,789
and their support
will mean a great deal
399
00:20:02,989 --> 00:20:03,833
to the campaign.
400
00:20:04,033 --> 00:20:04,791
Now, that's their
daughter Heather,
401
00:20:04,991 --> 00:20:06,401
the one I was
telling you about.
402
00:20:06,601 --> 00:20:07,794
Don't forget
to smile.
403
00:20:07,994 --> 00:20:09,360
Hello.
How are you?
404
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:10,448
Good to
see you again.
405
00:20:10,648 --> 00:20:11,798
Oh, Heather, you're
looking beautiful.
406
00:20:11,998 --> 00:20:14,235
This is my son
Morgan.
407
00:20:17,020 --> 00:20:19,109
Hi.
408
00:20:19,309 --> 00:20:20,720
Jules,
409
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:21,851
there's a rumor afloat
410
00:20:22,051 --> 00:20:23,766
you may be on
the wrong team, my friend.
411
00:20:23,966 --> 00:20:25,812
Chlorine
and ultraviolet rays
412
00:20:26,012 --> 00:20:27,378
age you terribly.
413
00:20:27,578 --> 00:20:29,337
But then, I've always
been fascinated
414
00:20:29,537 --> 00:20:30,512
by skin care.
415
00:20:30,712 --> 00:20:32,819
What are your
interests, Morgan?
416
00:20:33,019 --> 00:20:33,950
Um...
417
00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:35,865
Uh, I was dropped
on my head as a baby.
418
00:20:36,065 --> 00:20:38,215
Since then, I've pretty
much lost interest
419
00:20:38,415 --> 00:20:40,217
in just about
everything.
420
00:20:40,417 --> 00:20:43,699
Oh...that's sad.
421
00:20:43,899 --> 00:20:45,875
I have too many
interests-
422
00:20:46,075 --> 00:20:47,137
the young Republicans...
423
00:20:47,337 --> 00:20:49,792
I have 9 different
third-world pen pals,
424
00:20:49,992 --> 00:20:52,577
and I just organized
a "say no" chapter
425
00:20:52,777 --> 00:20:53,883
at school.
426
00:20:54,083 --> 00:20:57,060
It's to help teenagers
say no to premarital sex.
427
00:20:58,279 --> 00:21:00,107
You'd be amazed at how kids
428
00:21:00,307 --> 00:21:02,239
just can't say no.
429
00:21:02,439 --> 00:21:06,853
Send me all the literature
you have on that subject.
430
00:21:12,815 --> 00:21:15,383
Mom: Oh, here he is.
Over here, Morgan.
431
00:21:15,583 --> 00:21:17,733
Yes, I'd like you
to meet our son Morgan.
432
00:21:17,933 --> 00:21:19,822
I don't believe it,
darling!
433
00:21:20,022 --> 00:21:21,911
You're simply too young
to be the mother
434
00:21:22,111 --> 00:21:24,784
of such a darling
young man.
435
00:21:24,984 --> 00:21:26,873
How old are you,
Morton?
436
00:21:27,073 --> 00:21:28,004
Uh, Morgan-
437
00:21:28,204 --> 00:21:30,398
he just turned 12.
438
00:21:30,598 --> 00:21:33,880
Just a baby!
439
00:21:36,491 --> 00:21:38,058
Mom: If you don't
stop disappearing,
440
00:21:38,258 --> 00:21:39,711
I'll have to
put a cowbell
441
00:21:39,911 --> 00:21:40,800
around your neck.
442
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,671
What's that? Meat!
You're eating meat!
443
00:21:42,871 --> 00:21:44,064
Don't eat meat!
444
00:21:44,264 --> 00:21:44,934
But I'm hungry.
445
00:21:45,134 --> 00:21:46,980
Well, why not eat
some drano
446
00:21:47,180 --> 00:21:48,982
or rat poison?
447
00:21:49,182 --> 00:21:50,853
Do you know
what meat does
448
00:21:51,053 --> 00:21:51,854
to your body?
449
00:21:52,054 --> 00:21:53,682
Little globs
of putrid fat
450
00:21:53,882 --> 00:21:55,597
choking
your arteries.
451
00:21:55,797 --> 00:21:56,685
Flecks of gristle
452
00:21:56,885 --> 00:21:57,729
trapped
between your teeth.
453
00:21:57,929 --> 00:22:00,036
Stringy, smelly
chunks of dead flesh
454
00:22:00,236 --> 00:22:01,385
rotting out
your lower tract.
455
00:22:01,585 --> 00:22:03,083
Christ, Morgan,
don't you see what
456
00:22:03,283 --> 00:22:04,911
eating meat does to
your complexion-
457
00:22:05,111 --> 00:22:06,129
yoo-hoo!
Hello, Sylvia!
458
00:22:06,329 --> 00:22:07,914
Mom, everybody has zits
when they're my age.
459
00:22:08,114 --> 00:22:09,611
Well, we'll have to do
something about that,
460
00:22:09,811 --> 00:22:11,047
won't we? Hello, Sylvia!
461
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:12,179
I, uh, how are you?
462
00:22:12,379 --> 00:22:15,660
Oh, it's so nice
to see you again!
463
00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:18,315
Thanks for coming by.
464
00:22:18,515 --> 00:22:19,926
Oh, ho!
465
00:22:20,126 --> 00:22:20,927
Hi!
466
00:22:21,127 --> 00:22:22,276
Hi.
467
00:22:25,366 --> 00:22:29,500
Try acting like you're
having a good time, sport.
468
00:22:31,024 --> 00:22:32,764
Ok.
469
00:22:35,419 --> 00:22:37,421
Mom: Isn't
Heather a Saint?
470
00:22:37,621 --> 00:22:39,249
Morgan: Oh, yeah,
she's a real Joan of arc.
471
00:22:39,449 --> 00:22:41,295
Somebody ought to
tie her to a stake
472
00:22:41,495 --> 00:22:44,907
and set her on fire.
473
00:22:56,701 --> 00:22:58,790
No!
474
00:23:00,705 --> 00:23:02,142
Look at this.
475
00:23:02,342 --> 00:23:03,317
What?
476
00:23:03,517 --> 00:23:04,753
This man actually
hopped around the world
477
00:23:04,953 --> 00:23:05,536
on one foot.
478
00:23:05,736 --> 00:23:06,450
You know what's wrong
479
00:23:06,650 --> 00:23:07,364
with peoplemagazine?
480
00:23:07,564 --> 00:23:10,193
We've never been
on the cover.
481
00:23:10,628 --> 00:23:13,980
Jay says we have to wait
for them to come to US.
482
00:23:14,180 --> 00:23:15,416
He says if we go to them,
483
00:23:15,616 --> 00:23:17,070
it's a guaranteed
hatchet job.
484
00:23:17,270 --> 00:23:17,984
Um, not necessarily.
485
00:23:18,184 --> 00:23:19,507
I had a nice
little discussion
486
00:23:19,707 --> 00:23:21,901
with bill whitewood
this evening.
487
00:23:22,101 --> 00:23:24,555
You are amazing.
488
00:23:25,382 --> 00:23:27,819
All my stuff is gone.
489
00:23:28,019 --> 00:23:29,082
What stuff?
490
00:23:29,282 --> 00:23:31,388
Oh, some pornographic
film posters, I suppose.
491
00:23:31,588 --> 00:23:32,520
I had Ivan remove them.
492
00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,088
Mom, horror films
are not pornographic.
493
00:23:35,288 --> 00:23:36,959
Where are they?
494
00:23:37,159 --> 00:23:38,613
In the incinerator
by now.
495
00:23:38,813 --> 00:23:40,006
Oh, no-mom,
they were mine!
496
00:23:40,206 --> 00:23:42,660
Mom, it took me years
to collect them.
497
00:23:42,860 --> 00:23:44,010
I don't believe this!
498
00:23:44,210 --> 00:23:47,317
Now don't get
so emotional.
499
00:23:47,517 --> 00:23:48,449
There are members
of the press
500
00:23:48,649 --> 00:23:50,320
trotting through
this house all the time,
501
00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:51,321
and I will not have
502
00:23:51,521 --> 00:23:53,062
that expensively
decorated bedroom
503
00:23:53,262 --> 00:23:54,759
turned into
a Times Square
504
00:23:54,959 --> 00:23:55,717
subway station.
505
00:23:55,917 --> 00:23:56,848
But it's my room!
506
00:23:57,048 --> 00:23:57,762
Yourroom?
507
00:23:57,962 --> 00:23:59,677
No, no, no, son.
Don't you see?
508
00:23:59,877 --> 00:24:00,983
Your room is your room
509
00:24:01,183 --> 00:24:03,116
the way our room
is our room,
510
00:24:03,316 --> 00:24:04,378
but in a wider sense,
511
00:24:04,578 --> 00:24:06,510
our house...Is...
512
00:24:06,710 --> 00:24:07,207
Our house.
513
00:24:07,407 --> 00:24:08,730
And you are
a guest!
514
00:24:08,930 --> 00:24:09,731
I'm not a guest!
515
00:24:09,931 --> 00:24:10,993
I'm your son,
for crying out loud!
516
00:24:11,193 --> 00:24:12,995
I mean, if we're going
to pretend to be a family,
517
00:24:13,195 --> 00:24:15,650
we might as well take
advantage of the situation.
518
00:24:15,850 --> 00:24:16,868
Now wait.
519
00:24:17,068 --> 00:24:19,567
Just one moment, please.
520
00:24:20,481 --> 00:24:23,049
Now, I know
it's trendy and all that,
521
00:24:23,249 --> 00:24:24,180
but I don't subscribe
522
00:24:24,380 --> 00:24:27,227
to the buddy-buddy school
of parenthood.
523
00:24:27,427 --> 00:24:29,229
I'm not a pal.
524
00:24:29,429 --> 00:24:31,187
I'm a mother.
525
00:24:31,387 --> 00:24:33,233
Good night, Morgan.
526
00:24:34,843 --> 00:24:39,326
I can't believe this!
I'm an orphan with parents!
527
00:24:41,110 --> 00:24:44,896
We are going to be a family
if it kills me.
528
00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:48,944
Things are going to
change around here.
529
00:24:49,144 --> 00:24:51,033
Marsha Brady on TV: Well,
you heard him tell her
530
00:24:51,233 --> 00:24:53,035
what a great job
we were doing
531
00:24:53,235 --> 00:24:54,210
taking care
of the house
532
00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:56,256
so she wouldn't worry
and come home.
533
00:24:56,456 --> 00:24:57,344
Greg: That's right.
534
00:24:57,544 --> 00:24:59,041
No, it's wrong.
535
00:24:59,241 --> 00:25:00,477
We're doing a terrible job.
536
00:25:00,677 --> 00:25:04,612
We're trying, but
we're not trying together.
537
00:25:06,744 --> 00:25:07,789
Charge!
538
00:25:12,620 --> 00:25:13,708
Mike: Ok.
Once again, kids,
539
00:25:13,908 --> 00:25:15,231
I've called a-
a late-evening meeting,
540
00:25:15,431 --> 00:25:17,799
but this time, it's not
for a medical bulletin
541
00:25:17,999 --> 00:25:19,931
or to lecture you
about carelessness.
542
00:25:20,131 --> 00:25:23,065
It's to tell you how proud,
how pleased I am...
543
00:25:23,265 --> 00:25:24,371
Of course.
544
00:25:24,571 --> 00:25:25,546
It's so obvious.
545
00:25:25,746 --> 00:25:27,243
Greg: We're glad
you're pleased, dad,
546
00:25:27,443 --> 00:25:29,245
'cause we really tried.
547
00:25:34,207 --> 00:25:36,426
See here?
548
00:25:36,626 --> 00:25:37,384
Look.
549
00:25:37,584 --> 00:25:39,473
"Surgeon general"
550
00:25:39,673 --> 00:25:42,519
encourages
all American comrades
551
00:25:42,719 --> 00:25:44,478
to smoke a lot.
552
00:25:44,678 --> 00:25:45,566
Huh!
553
00:25:45,766 --> 00:25:46,915
You won't take time
to learn English.
554
00:25:47,115 --> 00:25:49,961
Then you must suffer
in ignorance.
555
00:25:57,534 --> 00:25:58,883
I don't fart!
556
00:25:59,083 --> 00:26:00,189
Ah?
557
00:26:07,196 --> 00:26:08,110
Wait. You wait.
558
00:26:08,310 --> 00:26:10,591
I become
real estate tycoon,
559
00:26:10,791 --> 00:26:11,635
divorce you,
560
00:26:11,835 --> 00:26:14,290
and marry beautiful
stewardess. Oh!
561
00:26:17,989 --> 00:26:19,382
How you doing?
562
00:27:10,781 --> 00:27:13,001
I come. I come.
563
00:27:27,929 --> 00:27:30,584
You can't get good help.
Let's go!
564
00:27:30,784 --> 00:27:32,499
I come. I come.
565
00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:35,589
Aah!
566
00:27:41,334 --> 00:27:44,293
I told them not to hire
that Russian.
567
00:27:45,947 --> 00:27:48,210
Ohh!
568
00:27:48,906 --> 00:27:52,214
Morgan, what on earth
is going on down there?
569
00:27:52,414 --> 00:27:53,824
Oh, I was just doing-
570
00:27:54,024 --> 00:27:56,218
whoaaah!
571
00:27:57,001 --> 00:27:59,352
The floor.
572
00:27:59,917 --> 00:28:01,658
Just doing what
573
00:28:01,858 --> 00:28:03,225
to the floor?
574
00:28:03,425 --> 00:28:06,228
Uh...uh, waxing it
575
00:28:06,428 --> 00:28:08,448
a little.
576
00:28:09,318 --> 00:28:11,364
I want you at that
breakfast table
577
00:28:11,564 --> 00:28:13,279
in 20...
578
00:28:14,715 --> 00:28:17,283
Make that
18 minutes.
579
00:28:17,483 --> 00:28:19,023
And dressed properly.
580
00:28:19,223 --> 00:28:23,071
Not like a psychedelic
crop duster.
581
00:28:23,271 --> 00:28:24,551
Ok?
582
00:28:25,943 --> 00:28:26,857
Ok.
583
00:28:27,057 --> 00:28:28,468
Does anybody know
I'm out here?!
584
00:28:28,668 --> 00:28:32,689
Uh, what? Oh, no,
thanks, Ivan. Save it.
585
00:28:38,565 --> 00:28:42,090
I'm, uh, I'm sorry
about the floor, Ivan.
586
00:28:42,290 --> 00:28:43,918
It's ok.
587
00:28:52,970 --> 00:28:56,235
Mmm! Looks good.
588
00:28:59,803 --> 00:29:01,457
Hey, dad, uh...
589
00:29:01,657 --> 00:29:04,591
I was thinking about, uh,
getting a couple of tickets
590
00:29:04,791 --> 00:29:05,853
to the redskins game.
591
00:29:06,053 --> 00:29:08,334
Oh, I don't know, Morgan,
I'm very, very busy.
592
00:29:08,534 --> 00:29:09,770
Actually,
we could get
593
00:29:09,970 --> 00:29:12,381
some very nice media
mileage out of that.
594
00:29:12,581 --> 00:29:14,818
Father and son rootin'
for the home team.
595
00:29:15,018 --> 00:29:16,037
Nancy: Fix it, Jay.
596
00:29:16,237 --> 00:29:19,519
Jay: I'll take care of it
right away.
597
00:29:22,913 --> 00:29:24,785
Nancy: No, I know,
but listen, Marjorie,
598
00:29:24,985 --> 00:29:26,308
what's been bothering me
all day
599
00:29:26,508 --> 00:29:30,530
is should I seat the Websters
on the right or on the left?
600
00:29:30,921 --> 00:29:33,315
Mm-hmm. Well, no,
I'd like to insult them,
601
00:29:33,515 --> 00:29:35,361
but I don't want
to alienate them.
602
00:29:35,561 --> 00:29:36,362
Oh, yes, Jay.
603
00:29:36,562 --> 00:29:37,537
I'm trying to find Morgan.
604
00:29:37,737 --> 00:29:39,060
I need him to sign something
from the bank.
605
00:29:39,260 --> 00:29:40,104
Well, he's probably
upstairs
606
00:29:40,304 --> 00:29:41,541
performing an autopsy
or something.
607
00:29:41,741 --> 00:29:44,457
Can you hang on a minute,
Marjorie, please? Thanks.
608
00:29:44,657 --> 00:29:46,023
Morgan! Where are you?
609
00:29:46,223 --> 00:29:47,242
Yes, Marjorie.
610
00:29:47,442 --> 00:29:48,417
Now, what
is this?Oh, god.
611
00:29:48,617 --> 00:29:50,463
I cannot tell you
the problems I'm having.
612
00:29:50,663 --> 00:29:52,334
What areyou doing?
613
00:29:52,534 --> 00:29:54,641
I was just doing
the windows.
614
00:29:54,841 --> 00:29:55,946
Pretty good idea, huh?
615
00:29:56,146 --> 00:29:58,340
No. Come on in. Jay wants
you to sign something.
616
00:29:58,540 --> 00:29:59,602
I'm sorry, Marjorie.
617
00:29:59,802 --> 00:30:01,387
Oh, you think I should
seat them on the right,
618
00:30:01,587 --> 00:30:02,605
then tell them
it was a mistake
619
00:30:02,805 --> 00:30:04,303
and have them move
to the left?
620
00:30:04,503 --> 00:30:06,348
No, look, stewarts
do not do chores.
621
00:30:06,548 --> 00:30:08,785
We most assuredly
do not do windows.
622
00:30:08,985 --> 00:30:12,441
Just stop sneaking around
like a hyperactive handyman.
623
00:30:12,641 --> 00:30:15,749
Yeah. No, no,
I was talking to my son.
624
00:30:15,949 --> 00:30:19,622
Yeah. No, he just keeps
doing these things to help.
625
00:30:19,822 --> 00:30:20,667
Oh, he must get it
626
00:30:20,867 --> 00:30:22,973
from his father's side
of the family.
627
00:30:23,173 --> 00:30:24,235
Uh, what is this?
628
00:30:24,435 --> 00:30:26,629
I've opened a safe deposit box
in your name
629
00:30:26,829 --> 00:30:27,717
at throckmorton trust
630
00:30:27,917 --> 00:30:29,632
to keep the silver-dollar
collection
631
00:30:29,832 --> 00:30:31,417
your aunt Matilda
left you in her will.
632
00:30:31,617 --> 00:30:34,333
Well, I didn't know
aunt Matilda died.
633
00:30:34,533 --> 00:30:37,423
I didn't even know
aunt Matilda.
634
00:30:37,623 --> 00:30:38,424
Mm-hmm.
635
00:30:38,624 --> 00:30:39,816
But, uh, how many
did she collect?
636
00:30:40,016 --> 00:30:42,863
I don't know.
About 500 or so, I think.
637
00:30:43,063 --> 00:30:45,256
This is for your own
protection, Morgan.
638
00:30:45,456 --> 00:30:48,085
Your mother thought
it was a good idea.
639
00:30:48,285 --> 00:30:49,304
Right here.
640
00:30:49,504 --> 00:30:50,827
Ok.
641
00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:55,441
Ah, thank you.
642
00:30:55,641 --> 00:30:56,833
Nancy, I need you
to sign this, too,
643
00:30:57,033 --> 00:30:58,269
to certify you
as legal guardian.
644
00:30:58,469 --> 00:31:01,098
No, I know. We were going
to have the soybean tartare.
645
00:31:01,298 --> 00:31:03,927
Uh-huh.
With a marsala sauce.
646
00:31:04,127 --> 00:31:06,190
A Greek thing, maybe.
647
00:31:07,366 --> 00:31:09,063
No, I think it's grace.
648
00:31:09,263 --> 00:31:11,457
Well, whatever it was
really...
649
00:31:11,657 --> 00:31:12,762
Uh, Jay.
Yes?
650
00:31:12,962 --> 00:31:14,547
Uh, where's the key?
651
00:31:14,747 --> 00:31:15,417
What key?
652
00:31:15,617 --> 00:31:16,940
To the safety deposit box.
653
00:31:17,140 --> 00:31:19,552
I mean, considering that it's
my silver-dollar collection,
654
00:31:19,752 --> 00:31:21,205
don't you think
I should have the key?
655
00:31:21,405 --> 00:31:22,293
Oh-ho-ho, please!
656
00:31:22,493 --> 00:31:25,471
What's the matter,
you don't trust me?
657
00:31:25,671 --> 00:31:26,385
Hey!
658
00:31:26,585 --> 00:31:30,301
Hey! I'm your
uncle Jay, kid.
659
00:31:30,693 --> 00:31:32,434
Here.
660
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:35,742
Wait a minute.
661
00:31:35,942 --> 00:31:37,352
On second thought, maybe
I better hang onto this.
662
00:31:37,552 --> 00:31:40,050
I'm not sure you can
handle the responsibility.
663
00:31:40,250 --> 00:31:41,051
You want the key?
664
00:31:41,251 --> 00:31:42,792
It's right here
in my vest pocket
665
00:31:42,992 --> 00:31:44,620
anytime you need it.
666
00:31:45,404 --> 00:31:46,187
Well, Jay...
667
00:31:46,387 --> 00:31:47,580
What are you
wearing now?!
668
00:31:47,780 --> 00:31:49,886
Oh, not you, Marjorie.
Sorry. Morgan.
669
00:31:50,086 --> 00:31:51,975
Now I want you to go
into town with Ivan
670
00:31:52,175 --> 00:31:54,325
and purchase some
suitable clothing.
671
00:31:54,525 --> 00:31:55,414
And no more chores.
672
00:31:55,614 --> 00:31:57,590
If I'd wanted a servant
for a son,
673
00:31:57,790 --> 00:31:59,113
I'd have had sex
with the chauffeur.
674
00:31:59,313 --> 00:32:02,072
Sorry, dear.
Where were we?
675
00:32:02,272 --> 00:32:03,509
No, I did not invite her.
676
00:32:03,709 --> 00:32:05,728
Oh, that's all I need-
some divorced actress in heat
677
00:32:05,928 --> 00:32:08,949
prancing around in a sarong
made of saran wrap.
678
00:32:11,691 --> 00:32:14,563
Ivan: You clean
the house good.
679
00:32:14,763 --> 00:32:16,522
Madame pleased, yes?
680
00:32:16,722 --> 00:32:19,307
No, madam not pleased.
681
00:32:19,742 --> 00:32:20,830
One day soon,
682
00:32:21,030 --> 00:32:23,746
I be building
and selling condos.
683
00:32:23,946 --> 00:32:25,226
Big profits.
684
00:32:25,426 --> 00:32:26,575
In Russia,
685
00:32:26,775 --> 00:32:27,968
no real estate
opportunities.
686
00:32:28,168 --> 00:32:30,492
Maybe you want to invest
a little something?
687
00:32:30,692 --> 00:32:31,798
Oh, I don't know, Ivan.
688
00:32:31,998 --> 00:32:33,452
I make you partner.
689
00:32:33,652 --> 00:32:34,365
I'll think about it.
690
00:32:40,067 --> 00:32:41,547
Christmas.
691
00:32:41,747 --> 00:32:43,505
Great concept.
692
00:32:43,705 --> 00:32:46,334
You got one hour.
693
00:32:46,856 --> 00:32:48,554
Meet me at the car.
694
00:32:48,754 --> 00:32:50,120
Ok.
695
00:32:54,647 --> 00:32:56,475
Attention, shoppers,
696
00:32:56,675 --> 00:33:00,522
get George romero's
autograph at waldenbooks.
697
00:33:00,722 --> 00:33:02,785
Meet the creator
of the living dead,
698
00:33:02,985 --> 00:33:04,526
film director
George romero
699
00:33:04,726 --> 00:33:05,614
live, in person,
700
00:33:05,814 --> 00:33:09,662
at waldenbooks
on the south concourse.
701
00:33:09,862 --> 00:33:11,272
You been waiting
here long?
702
00:33:11,472 --> 00:33:13,622
I can't believe
he's here.
703
00:33:13,883 --> 00:33:15,102
Attention, shoppers,
704
00:33:15,302 --> 00:33:19,062
get George romero's
autograph at waldenbooks.
705
00:33:19,262 --> 00:33:21,674
Meet the creator
of the living dead,
706
00:33:21,874 --> 00:33:23,937
film director
George romero
707
00:33:24,137 --> 00:33:25,025
live, in person,
708
00:33:25,225 --> 00:33:29,377
at waldenbooks
on the south concourse.
709
00:33:30,509 --> 00:33:31,727
Hey! Sorry I'm late.
710
00:33:31,927 --> 00:33:35,514
Man: Hey, come on.
The line starts back there.
711
00:33:36,906 --> 00:33:41,520
Uh, sh-uh, she's with-
she's with me, mister.
712
00:33:43,652 --> 00:33:44,871
Thanks a lot.
713
00:33:45,071 --> 00:33:46,525
Oh, uh, no problem.
714
00:33:46,725 --> 00:33:49,049
Uh, it happens to me
all the time.
715
00:33:49,249 --> 00:33:54,010
I don't mean to pry, but,
uh, uh, do I know you?
716
00:33:54,210 --> 00:33:56,709
Uh, I don't think so.
What's your name?
717
00:33:56,909 --> 00:33:59,320
Uh, Morgan.
What's yours?
718
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:00,930
Uh, Emily.
719
00:34:01,130 --> 00:34:02,497
You can call me m.
720
00:34:02,697 --> 00:34:05,587
You know, like
dial m for murder.
721
00:34:05,787 --> 00:34:08,590
You know, that's, uh,
that's one of my favorites.
722
00:34:08,790 --> 00:34:10,592
Did you know it was
the only Hitchcock film
723
00:34:10,792 --> 00:34:11,593
ever made in 3-d?
724
00:34:11,793 --> 00:34:12,855
Yeah.
725
00:34:13,055 --> 00:34:17,425
Yeah. I-i knew that.
726
00:34:18,165 --> 00:34:19,906
Morgan:...Shopping mall,
so you'd have a hard time
727
00:34:20,106 --> 00:34:21,603
knowing the difference
between the living dead
728
00:34:21,803 --> 00:34:22,778
and your average
Christmas shopper.
729
00:34:22,978 --> 00:34:25,302
Yeah! What
a comparison, though.
730
00:34:25,502 --> 00:34:27,217
Oh, but you know what
my favorite was?
731
00:34:27,417 --> 00:34:29,002
Which one? Night of the
living dead.
732
00:34:29,202 --> 00:34:31,613
That's the best one.
That's definitely the best one.
733
00:34:31,813 --> 00:34:33,659
Well, that was the original.
It was in black and white.
734
00:34:33,859 --> 00:34:34,877
I love black and white.
735
00:34:35,077 --> 00:34:36,618
I adore black and white!
Isn't it the best?!
736
00:34:36,818 --> 00:34:38,054
It's the best.
737
00:34:38,254 --> 00:34:40,927
Horror films are definitely
the purest form of cinema!
738
00:34:41,127 --> 00:34:42,711
Horror films
are so pure.
739
00:34:42,911 --> 00:34:45,714
I love horror films!
They are the best!
740
00:34:45,914 --> 00:34:47,977
This is so funny. I was
exactly thinking that.
741
00:34:48,177 --> 00:34:48,935
I cannot believe-
742
00:34:49,135 --> 00:34:50,110
hey! Watch it, man!
743
00:34:50,310 --> 00:34:53,940
Sorry. I, uh...
Oh, uh, where's his head?
744
00:34:54,140 --> 00:34:55,071
I'm, uh...
745
00:34:55,271 --> 00:34:56,333
That's just really
a demeaning question.
746
00:34:56,533 --> 00:34:57,770
It's my turn,
it's my turn.
747
00:34:57,970 --> 00:34:59,249
Take this.
748
00:34:59,641 --> 00:35:01,861
Sir, here you go.
749
00:35:02,061 --> 00:35:05,386
Uh, so, anyway,
i-i was just wondering
750
00:35:05,586 --> 00:35:06,692
if there might be
some way
751
00:35:06,892 --> 00:35:09,782
for US to maybe get
together sometime?
752
00:35:09,982 --> 00:35:11,305
You-you mean
like a date?
753
00:35:11,505 --> 00:35:13,133
Well, not necessarily
a date.
754
00:35:13,333 --> 00:35:15,091
Just, well, a date.
755
00:35:15,291 --> 00:35:16,615
Sure. You have a car?
756
00:35:16,815 --> 00:35:18,965
Uh, yeah, sure.
Uh-huh.
757
00:35:19,165 --> 00:35:21,358
Well, cool. Well, um,
I was planning on going
758
00:35:21,558 --> 00:35:25,711
to a late show of attack of
the killer tomatoestonight.
759
00:35:25,911 --> 00:35:26,668
You wanna go?
760
00:35:26,868 --> 00:35:27,669
Sure.
761
00:35:27,869 --> 00:35:29,236
Sure. What about
your folks?
762
00:35:29,436 --> 00:35:30,672
Oh, well, they trust me.
It's cool.
763
00:35:30,872 --> 00:35:32,805
But if it's not cool
with you, it's ok.
764
00:35:33,005 --> 00:35:34,154
We can do it another night.
765
00:35:34,354 --> 00:35:35,938
No, I'm real close to my
parents. We're like this.
766
00:35:36,138 --> 00:35:38,724
So I guess, uh, I guess
I'll pick you up, right?
767
00:35:38,924 --> 00:35:41,465
Yeah, you can pick me up
around 8:00 at my house.
768
00:35:41,665 --> 00:35:42,815
You can have dinner with US.
769
00:35:43,015 --> 00:35:45,687
I'll tell my mom. She'd
love to have you, really.
770
00:35:45,887 --> 00:35:46,688
Oh, great, um...
771
00:35:46,888 --> 00:35:49,038
Does-does your family
eat meat?
772
00:35:49,238 --> 00:35:50,474
Yeah. Every night.
773
00:35:50,674 --> 00:35:51,693
Oh, great. Great.
774
00:35:51,893 --> 00:35:55,741
♪ I'm in love,
I'm in love, I'm in- ♪
775
00:35:57,568 --> 00:35:59,788
♪ he's in love, yes!
776
00:35:59,988 --> 00:36:01,268
♪ He's in love
777
00:36:01,468 --> 00:36:04,488
♪ and he's been in love
the last hour and a half ♪
778
00:36:04,688 --> 00:36:08,449
♪ and he's in love,
love, love, love, love ♪
779
00:36:08,649 --> 00:36:12,061
♪ love, love, love, love,
ahh! ♪
780
00:36:12,261 --> 00:36:12,932
Hi, mom.
781
00:36:13,132 --> 00:36:16,239
♪ I'm in love,
yes, love ♪
782
00:36:16,439 --> 00:36:17,545
♪ love, love, love, love
783
00:36:17,745 --> 00:36:22,158
♪ love, love, love,
love, love, love ♪
784
00:36:22,358 --> 00:36:24,247
Oops. Aha, mistake.
785
00:36:24,447 --> 00:36:26,989
♪ Love, love, love, love
786
00:36:27,189 --> 00:36:28,512
♪ love, love, love
787
00:36:28,712 --> 00:36:32,212
♪ love, love, love, love,
love, love ♪
788
00:36:32,412 --> 00:36:33,604
♪ i'm
789
00:36:33,804 --> 00:36:35,737
♪ in...
790
00:36:38,871 --> 00:36:44,871
♪ Love
791
00:36:46,835 --> 00:36:48,707
catch, mom!
792
00:36:50,012 --> 00:36:52,841
Dear god, he's on drugs.
793
00:36:54,843 --> 00:36:57,933
Doc, I am not on drugs.
794
00:37:03,025 --> 00:37:05,114
Then perhaps there's
another explanation
795
00:37:05,314 --> 00:37:06,115
for your behavior?
796
00:37:06,315 --> 00:37:07,769
Well, yeah,
my mother and father.
797
00:37:07,969 --> 00:37:12,078
Well, then, how do your
mother and father behave?
798
00:37:12,278 --> 00:37:13,514
Well...
799
00:37:13,714 --> 00:37:16,517
Dad's joined the ranks
of the political undead,
800
00:37:16,717 --> 00:37:18,780
and sometimes my mother
acts like I'm a sperm
801
00:37:18,980 --> 00:37:21,609
who chewed through her
diaphragm like a piranha fish
802
00:37:21,809 --> 00:37:23,002
just to destroy her life.
803
00:37:23,202 --> 00:37:25,787
I see, then-then you're
trying to get back at them.
804
00:37:25,987 --> 00:37:27,310
No, I just want to be close.
805
00:37:27,510 --> 00:37:30,879
Look, I know that washing
the windows and doing the floors
806
00:37:31,079 --> 00:37:33,142
isn't gonna make
any difference, i-
807
00:37:33,342 --> 00:37:34,665
just maybe they'll
get the message.
808
00:37:34,865 --> 00:37:36,145
In all honesty, Morgan,
I don't see how
809
00:37:36,345 --> 00:37:38,539
you're going to get your
message across by...
810
00:37:38,739 --> 00:37:39,888
Talking to yourself,
811
00:37:40,088 --> 00:37:41,150
pretending
to be a servant,
812
00:37:41,350 --> 00:37:44,153
collecting pornographic
film posters, and...
813
00:37:44,353 --> 00:37:47,809
Giving spontaneous
dance recitals.
814
00:37:48,009 --> 00:37:50,638
Oh, god.
815
00:37:51,770 --> 00:37:53,815
Look, doc, ok. I'm...
816
00:37:54,015 --> 00:37:56,600
I'm gonna level with you.
817
00:37:56,800 --> 00:37:58,472
Ok, I have been doing drugs.
818
00:37:58,672 --> 00:38:01,475
I understand. I'm glad
you told me, Morgan.
819
00:38:01,675 --> 00:38:02,824
For your sake, I'm glad.
820
00:38:03,024 --> 00:38:05,696
Now exactly what kind
of drugs?
821
00:38:07,873 --> 00:38:11,441
I've been freebasing
clearasil.
822
00:38:12,878 --> 00:38:14,096
To a large extent,
823
00:38:14,296 --> 00:38:15,968
Morgan's violent
mood shifts,
824
00:38:16,168 --> 00:38:17,926
his bouts of irrationality,
825
00:38:18,126 --> 00:38:20,929
the paranoia,
his persecution complex,
826
00:38:21,129 --> 00:38:22,888
can all be attributed
to adolescence.
827
00:38:23,088 --> 00:38:25,847
Thank you, doctor.
828
00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:28,850
Well, isn't there some
kind of hormone shot
829
00:38:29,050 --> 00:38:29,895
you could give him?
830
00:38:30,095 --> 00:38:31,070
I'm afraid not.
831
00:38:31,270 --> 00:38:33,812
There's no known
cure for puberty.
832
00:38:34,012 --> 00:38:36,249
Good-bye, senator.
833
00:38:38,817 --> 00:38:40,862
Tom: It's good to
have Morgan home.
834
00:38:41,062 --> 00:38:43,865
It's as if we really
were a family now.
835
00:38:44,065 --> 00:38:45,693
Oh, I don't know, Tom.
836
00:38:45,893 --> 00:38:46,825
He worries me.
837
00:38:47,025 --> 00:38:49,566
He seems so eager
for affection.
838
00:38:49,766 --> 00:38:53,919
Maybe I should've breast-fed
him when he was an infant.
839
00:38:54,119 --> 00:38:55,921
What are you
talking about?
840
00:38:56,121 --> 00:38:58,619
Breast-feeding.
Very chic nowadays.
841
00:38:58,819 --> 00:39:02,405
They say it helps create
some sort of affectionate bond
842
00:39:02,605 --> 00:39:03,798
between mother and child.
843
00:39:03,998 --> 00:39:05,887
Maybe I didn't
cuddle Morgan enough.
844
00:39:06,087 --> 00:39:09,108
Maybe that's why
he's so needy now.
845
00:39:09,412 --> 00:39:11,937
Well, maybe we sent him off
to boarding school
846
00:39:12,137 --> 00:39:13,199
too early.
847
00:39:13,399 --> 00:39:15,810
Well, I went to boarding school
when I was 5.
848
00:39:16,010 --> 00:39:17,116
I wasn't breast-fed.
849
00:39:17,316 --> 00:39:19,335
I didn't see my parents
till I was 6 months old.
850
00:39:19,535 --> 00:39:21,033
They took this
extended tour of Europe
851
00:39:21,233 --> 00:39:22,643
to recover from my birth.
852
00:39:22,843 --> 00:39:24,210
Mother felt she deserved it.
853
00:39:24,410 --> 00:39:26,865
And I turned out just fine.
854
00:39:28,823 --> 00:39:30,129
Oh, good lord.
855
00:39:30,329 --> 00:39:32,261
Too much hugging and kissing
could cripple a child.
856
00:39:32,461 --> 00:39:36,265
Look at the Italians.
They're all manic-depressives.
857
00:39:58,070 --> 00:40:03,902
♪ Rock this town, be the prince
of the city tonight ♪
858
00:40:04,424 --> 00:40:05,947
♪ cruisin' such a hot car
859
00:40:06,147 --> 00:40:09,908
♪ everybody starin'
at the stoplight ♪
860
00:40:10,517 --> 00:40:11,997
♪ let's roll and rock
861
00:40:12,197 --> 00:40:16,001
♪ shock the city tonight
862
00:40:16,201 --> 00:40:17,916
♪ I've got my baby
by my side ♪
863
00:40:18,116 --> 00:40:22,355
♪ kissin' me and holdin' on
so tight ♪
864
00:40:22,555 --> 00:40:25,619
♪ they had me locked up
for so long ♪
865
00:40:25,819 --> 00:40:29,188
♪ it's time I finally sing
my freedom song ♪
866
00:40:29,388 --> 00:40:30,929
♪ roll and rock
867
00:40:31,129 --> 00:40:32,931
♪ I'll shock the city
tonight ♪
868
00:40:33,131 --> 00:40:33,975
♪ roll and rock
869
00:40:34,175 --> 00:40:35,977
♪ I'll be the prince
of the city ♪
870
00:40:36,177 --> 00:40:37,065
♪ roll and rock
871
00:40:37,265 --> 00:40:39,067
♪ I'll shock the city
tonight ♪
872
00:40:39,267 --> 00:40:42,331
Volvo...
Eat my dust! Ah!
873
00:40:42,531 --> 00:40:43,419
♪ Prince of the city
874
00:40:43,619 --> 00:40:47,902
♪ the prince of the city
tonight ♪
875
00:40:48,102 --> 00:40:49,382
♪ voices on the radio
876
00:40:49,582 --> 00:40:52,776
♪ riding through the city
with my heart light ♪
877
00:40:54,474 --> 00:40:55,997
Emily: Billy,
get away from that door.
878
00:40:56,197 --> 00:40:58,391
Hi, you're Emily's
boyfriend, aren't you?
879
00:40:58,591 --> 00:40:59,914
Billy!
Wow!
880
00:41:00,114 --> 00:41:01,916
Billy, come here!
881
00:41:02,116 --> 00:41:03,918
Boss set of wheels!
882
00:41:04,118 --> 00:41:05,964
He's just...
883
00:41:06,164 --> 00:41:09,793
Billy! Get here now!
884
00:41:13,362 --> 00:41:14,842
You little doofus.
885
00:41:19,803 --> 00:41:21,066
That's my brother.
886
00:41:21,266 --> 00:41:22,284
Yeah. Ha.
887
00:41:22,484 --> 00:41:23,764
I figured that out.
888
00:41:23,964 --> 00:41:25,113
Cool car, though.
889
00:41:25,313 --> 00:41:26,985
Thanks.
890
00:41:29,074 --> 00:41:31,598
Emily's father:
The sauce is great, Mary.
891
00:41:31,798 --> 00:41:32,686
Thank you, dear.
892
00:41:32,886 --> 00:41:33,992
There we go.
893
00:41:34,192 --> 00:41:36,995
Pass the meatballs if you
get a chance, Morgan.
894
00:41:37,195 --> 00:41:38,344
Sure.
895
00:41:38,544 --> 00:41:40,041
Hey, Morgan, that's
a neat car you got out there.
896
00:41:40,241 --> 00:41:41,521
Thanks, Billy.
897
00:41:41,721 --> 00:41:43,958
Grandma, you hogging
the peas again?
898
00:41:44,158 --> 00:41:46,178
Not me.
It's-it's him.
899
00:41:46,378 --> 00:41:46,961
What?
900
00:41:47,161 --> 00:41:48,006
Basta, mama.
901
00:41:48,206 --> 00:41:50,747
My mother's got a thing
about peas.
902
00:41:50,947 --> 00:41:54,186
Oh. Oh, these meatballs
smell wonderful, Mrs. Kasela.
903
00:41:54,386 --> 00:41:55,100
Thank you.
904
00:41:55,300 --> 00:41:56,057
And so timely.
905
00:41:56,257 --> 00:41:57,102
Oh, why is that?
906
00:41:57,302 --> 00:41:59,278
Oh, Morgan has
this thing about meat.
907
00:41:59,478 --> 00:42:01,889
Oh, it's my favorite
form of sustenance.
908
00:42:02,089 --> 00:42:03,021
Yeah.
909
00:42:03,221 --> 00:42:05,153
I think you stole the car.
910
00:42:07,329 --> 00:42:08,243
You all right, Morgan?
911
00:42:08,443 --> 00:42:10,724
Yeah, I'm fine.
912
00:42:10,924 --> 00:42:11,768
I'm fine.
913
00:42:11,968 --> 00:42:13,770
Billy, why don't
you have some peas?
914
00:42:13,970 --> 00:42:15,859
Your mom made some
wonderful, wonderful peas.
915
00:42:16,059 --> 00:42:16,991
Mom, Morgan stole the car.
916
00:42:17,191 --> 00:42:18,471
That's nice, dear,
917
00:42:18,671 --> 00:42:20,168
now eat your dinner.
918
00:42:20,368 --> 00:42:21,735
So, Emily,
919
00:42:21,935 --> 00:42:23,084
what movie are you
dragging him to?
920
00:42:23,284 --> 00:42:27,045
♪ Attack...
Of the killer tomatoes! ♪
921
00:42:28,481 --> 00:42:29,308
Father: Oh, no!
922
00:42:29,508 --> 00:42:31,179
That's-that's a lemon.
923
00:42:31,379 --> 00:42:33,529
A lemon?!
924
00:42:33,729 --> 00:42:34,356
Hey, dad...
925
00:42:34,556 --> 00:42:36,097
Morgan stole a car.
926
00:42:36,297 --> 00:42:37,751
Enough, Billy.
927
00:42:37,951 --> 00:42:39,100
You said that 3 times.
928
00:42:39,300 --> 00:42:41,929
You realize, of course,
that strait-jacket
929
00:42:42,129 --> 00:42:43,191
is playing
at the inner circle.
930
00:42:43,391 --> 00:42:46,151
Now, you talk about
a classic hatchet murder-
931
00:42:46,351 --> 00:42:47,021
that's it.
932
00:42:47,221 --> 00:42:48,109
Huh, don't listen
to him.
933
00:42:48,309 --> 00:42:50,285
I didn't flinch once
that whole film.
934
00:42:50,485 --> 00:42:51,982
You tell me another film
935
00:42:52,182 --> 00:42:55,725
where you see a human head
bouncing down the stairs.
936
00:42:55,925 --> 00:42:57,249
Fred!
937
00:42:57,640 --> 00:42:59,947
Why won't anybody
listen to me?
938
00:43:00,147 --> 00:43:01,122
He stole a car.
939
00:43:01,322 --> 00:43:03,820
I'm not gonna let you
get away with this.
940
00:43:04,020 --> 00:43:05,909
Father: Ok,
have a nice time.
941
00:43:06,109 --> 00:43:07,607
Billy:Emily:
Mom, mom.Night, dad.
942
00:43:07,807 --> 00:43:09,174
Nice meeting you,
Morgan.
943
00:43:10,740 --> 00:43:12,612
Drive carefully now.
You hear me?
944
00:43:12,812 --> 00:43:14,266
Billy: Mom, I'm gonna
call the cops.
945
00:43:14,466 --> 00:43:16,529
Get back in here, Billy.
Get back in here.
946
00:43:16,729 --> 00:43:18,835
Oh, you must've
overdosed on my family.
947
00:43:19,035 --> 00:43:21,229
No, they're great,
especially Billy.
948
00:43:21,429 --> 00:43:22,796
Where did they
capture him?
949
00:43:22,996 --> 00:43:24,232
Actually, um,
marlin Perkins
950
00:43:24,432 --> 00:43:26,191
brought him over
from wild kingdom
951
00:43:26,391 --> 00:43:27,540
about 11 years ago.
952
00:43:42,294 --> 00:43:48,126
♪ Rock this town, be the prince
of the city tonight ♪
953
00:43:48,865 --> 00:43:50,302
♪ cruisin' such a hot car
954
00:43:50,502 --> 00:43:54,306
♪ everybody starin'
at the stoplight ♪
955
00:43:55,176 --> 00:43:56,960
♪ let's roll and rock
956
00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,963
♪ shock the city...
957
00:44:09,234 --> 00:44:13,194
♪ Attack of
the killer tomatoes ♪
958
00:44:13,394 --> 00:44:16,937
♪ attack of the killer
tomatoes ♪
959
00:44:17,137 --> 00:44:18,112
♪ they'll beat you,
bash you ♪
960
00:44:18,312 --> 00:44:19,287
♪ squish you, mash you
961
00:44:19,487 --> 00:44:20,549
♪ chew you up for brunch
962
00:44:20,749 --> 00:44:22,160
♪ and finish you off
963
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,336
♪ for dinner or lunch
964
00:44:25,728 --> 00:44:29,210
♪ attack of
the killer tomatoes ♪
965
00:44:29,410 --> 00:44:32,735
♪ attack of the killer
tomatoes ♪
966
00:44:32,935 --> 00:44:34,172
♪ they'll beat you,
bash you ♪
967
00:44:34,372 --> 00:44:35,129
♪ squish you, mash you
968
00:44:35,329 --> 00:44:36,174
♪ chew you up for brunch
969
00:44:36,374 --> 00:44:37,784
♪ and finish you off
970
00:44:37,984 --> 00:44:40,047
♪ for dinner or lunch,
lunch, lunch ♪
971
00:44:40,247 --> 00:44:45,183
♪ dinner or lunch
972
00:44:46,619 --> 00:44:47,576
I'm afraid, gentlemen,
973
00:44:47,776 --> 00:44:49,230
that what we have here
before US
974
00:44:49,430 --> 00:44:51,363
isn't what we thought.
975
00:44:51,563 --> 00:44:53,103
You don't mean...?
976
00:44:53,303 --> 00:44:54,279
This...
977
00:44:54,479 --> 00:44:56,803
Is a cherry tomato.
978
00:44:59,240 --> 00:45:02,000
Aaaah!
979
00:45:02,374 --> 00:45:04,202
Aaaaaaaah!
980
00:45:04,402 --> 00:45:07,335
It's so asleep.
I can't-ohh.
981
00:45:07,535 --> 00:45:11,296
It's totally-well, you've
gotta, like, shake it.
982
00:45:11,496 --> 00:45:12,775
No. Don't shake it.
983
00:45:12,975 --> 00:45:14,951
You've got to move it. I know,
but you've got to move it.
984
00:45:15,151 --> 00:45:16,257
It'll stop really quick.
985
00:45:16,457 --> 00:45:19,347
Ok, ok. Ahh. It's fine.
No problem. See?
986
00:45:19,547 --> 00:45:20,261
Hey, no problem.
987
00:45:20,461 --> 00:45:21,915
Let's go somewhere.
988
00:45:22,115 --> 00:45:23,046
Aren't you tired?
989
00:45:23,246 --> 00:45:24,961
I just had a nap.
I feel great. Come on.
990
00:45:25,161 --> 00:45:26,528
Come on, this way.
991
00:45:26,728 --> 00:45:27,703
Come on.
992
00:45:27,903 --> 00:45:31,229
Both: ♪ attack of
the killer tomatoes ♪
993
00:45:31,429 --> 00:45:36,277
♪ attack of
the killer tomatoes ♪
994
00:45:43,502 --> 00:45:47,027
It's beautiful.
I love it.
995
00:45:51,597 --> 00:45:54,164
Pull up a step
and have a seat.
996
00:45:54,364 --> 00:45:57,994
What are we
supposed to do here?
997
00:45:58,194 --> 00:46:00,301
This is my room.
998
00:46:00,501 --> 00:46:01,476
What?
999
00:46:01,676 --> 00:46:03,130
Everything's always
so crazy at my house.
1000
00:46:03,330 --> 00:46:04,436
There's always
something going on,
1001
00:46:04,636 --> 00:46:08,178
so I come here 'cause
it's a real nice view,
1002
00:46:08,378 --> 00:46:10,311
and there's
peace and quiet.
1003
00:46:10,511 --> 00:46:13,183
I shoot the bull with
my pal Abe in there.
1004
00:46:13,383 --> 00:46:17,275
He doesn't talk much,
but he's a real good listener.
1005
00:46:17,475 --> 00:46:19,712
Yeah, I like
monuments.
1006
00:46:19,912 --> 00:46:20,930
I love 'em.
1007
00:46:21,130 --> 00:46:22,367
When I was in school,
1008
00:46:22,567 --> 00:46:24,282
I used to do my homework
in a cemetery.
1009
00:46:24,482 --> 00:46:26,632
Well, 'cause, you know,
I was really into
1010
00:46:26,832 --> 00:46:31,376
the hand-carved benches
and the 8-foot angels
1011
00:46:31,576 --> 00:46:32,507
and stuff.
1012
00:46:32,707 --> 00:46:34,683
Yeah, everybody thought
I was so weird.
1013
00:46:34,883 --> 00:46:37,338
They used to
call me morbid.
1014
00:46:37,538 --> 00:46:38,470
Morbid Morgan!
1015
00:46:38,670 --> 00:46:41,342
Yes, morbid Morgan.
I'm so embarrassed.
1016
00:46:41,542 --> 00:46:42,343
No.
1017
00:46:42,543 --> 00:46:43,431
Yes.
1018
00:46:43,631 --> 00:46:45,912
Blabbermouth. That's
what they call me.
1019
00:46:46,112 --> 00:46:46,826
I talk too much.
1020
00:46:47,026 --> 00:46:49,742
No, no, no.
I don't think so.
1021
00:46:49,942 --> 00:46:52,092
I like
talking to you.
1022
00:46:58,185 --> 00:47:01,014
Where would you go right now
if you could go anywhere?
1023
00:47:01,214 --> 00:47:04,409
Oh, boy.
Uh, I'd go skiing.
1024
00:47:04,609 --> 00:47:05,410
Yeah?
1025
00:47:05,610 --> 00:47:06,411
Yeah.
1026
00:47:06,611 --> 00:47:07,281
You like the snow?
1027
00:47:07,481 --> 00:47:08,282
Oh, I love it.
1028
00:47:08,482 --> 00:47:09,414
I used to go skiing
with my family
1029
00:47:09,614 --> 00:47:10,806
all the time
when I was a kid.
1030
00:47:11,006 --> 00:47:13,766
I'd stay out there till
my face turned blue.
1031
00:47:13,966 --> 00:47:16,421
But it was fun.
It was fun.
1032
00:47:16,621 --> 00:47:18,945
We haven't been on
a family vacation
1033
00:47:19,145 --> 00:47:21,382
in a long time,
but, uh...
1034
00:47:21,582 --> 00:47:23,950
We will...Someday.
1035
00:47:24,150 --> 00:47:26,082
I'm working on it.
1036
00:47:26,282 --> 00:47:28,911
So, uh, do you ski?
1037
00:47:29,111 --> 00:47:31,958
Um, no. Actually,
I don't know how.
1038
00:47:32,158 --> 00:47:34,874
Well, come on.
I'm gonna show ya.
1039
00:47:35,074 --> 00:47:36,049
You're gonna teach me?
1040
00:47:36,249 --> 00:47:37,006
Stand up. I'm gonna
teach you how to ski.
1041
00:47:37,206 --> 00:47:38,181
We got a whole mountain
down here.
1042
00:47:38,381 --> 00:47:41,881
All of Washington
laid out in front of US.
1043
00:47:42,081 --> 00:47:43,186
Ready to go?
1044
00:47:43,386 --> 00:47:45,101
Keep your skis parallel
and your feet together.
1045
00:47:45,301 --> 00:47:46,015
Ok, ok.
1046
00:47:46,215 --> 00:47:47,495
And use your hips
for balance.
1047
00:47:47,695 --> 00:47:48,409
Mobility.
1048
00:47:48,609 --> 00:47:49,367
And mobility.
1049
00:47:49,567 --> 00:47:51,456
And use the sticks
to push along.
1050
00:47:51,656 --> 00:47:53,849
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I watch the Olympics.
1051
00:47:54,049 --> 00:47:56,504
Ok, ready? You don't
have to go down.
1052
00:47:56,704 --> 00:47:59,899
Just watch.
Shoo, shoo, shoo.
1053
00:48:00,099 --> 00:48:01,422
The sound effects
is it.
1054
00:48:01,622 --> 00:48:04,947
Shoo, shoo, shoo,
shoo, shoo, shoo.
1055
00:48:05,147 --> 00:48:05,861
Try it. Come on.
1056
00:48:06,061 --> 00:48:09,474
Ok, ok, ok.
Shoo. Right?
1057
00:48:09,674 --> 00:48:10,431
Yeah.
1058
00:48:10,631 --> 00:48:11,432
Shoo, shoo.
Oh, I'm getting it.
1059
00:48:11,632 --> 00:48:12,259
You've got
the hang of it.
1060
00:48:12,459 --> 00:48:13,434
You're better
than I am.
1061
00:48:13,634 --> 00:48:15,436
Downhill racer.
Shoo, shoo.
1062
00:48:15,636 --> 00:48:16,698
Shoo, shoo, shoo.
1063
00:48:16,898 --> 00:48:18,265
Ahem.
1064
00:48:18,465 --> 00:48:21,399
Good evening, officer.
1065
00:48:22,312 --> 00:48:23,444
Cross-country.
1066
00:48:23,644 --> 00:48:25,054
Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo.
1067
00:48:25,254 --> 00:48:31,017
Shoo, shoo. Oh, my god.
Oh, my god. Ha ha.
1068
00:48:50,079 --> 00:48:52,168
Oh, my god.
1069
00:48:53,256 --> 00:48:55,258
Keys.
1070
00:48:58,174 --> 00:48:59,828
Do you wanna come in?
1071
00:49:00,028 --> 00:49:03,441
Oh, I'd love to,
but, uh...
1072
00:49:03,641 --> 00:49:05,268
I got to get home.
1073
00:49:05,468 --> 00:49:09,751
Well, um, I really
had a great time.
1074
00:49:09,951 --> 00:49:13,451
So did I. So did I.
I-i had a great time.
1075
00:49:13,651 --> 00:49:16,454
And I was wondering
if maybe
1076
00:49:16,654 --> 00:49:18,804
we could do it
another time.
1077
00:49:19,004 --> 00:49:21,241
If I'm going too fast
for you, forget it.
1078
00:49:21,441 --> 00:49:23,548
Tomorrow night?
1079
00:49:23,983 --> 00:49:25,332
Great.
1080
00:49:25,532 --> 00:49:26,333
Yeah?
1081
00:49:26,533 --> 00:49:27,160
Great.
1082
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:30,642
Wait, um, pen.
1083
00:49:32,339 --> 00:49:35,647
Hand, please.
Ok, um...
1084
00:49:40,521 --> 00:49:44,394
Ok, that's my phone number.
You'll call me?
1085
00:49:44,594 --> 00:49:46,396
Ok.yeah.
1086
00:49:46,596 --> 00:49:48,007
Ok.
1087
00:49:48,207 --> 00:49:50,488
Um...
1088
00:49:52,533 --> 00:49:54,753
Good night.
1089
00:50:08,070 --> 00:50:10,072
Good evening,
senator Stewart.
1090
00:50:10,272 --> 00:50:13,554
Good evening, officer.
Come in.
1091
00:50:14,294 --> 00:50:15,730
Is there
something wrong?
1092
00:50:15,930 --> 00:50:16,862
Evening, ma'am.
1093
00:50:17,062 --> 00:50:17,906
Good evening.
1094
00:50:18,106 --> 00:50:18,994
Sorry to have to
wake you like this,
1095
00:50:19,194 --> 00:50:20,518
senator Stewart,
Mrs. Stewart,
1096
00:50:20,718 --> 00:50:22,650
but we got a report
earlier this evening
1097
00:50:22,850 --> 00:50:24,478
that your car
was stolen.
1098
00:50:24,678 --> 00:50:25,958
Probably just a prank.
1099
00:50:26,158 --> 00:50:28,830
Sounded like a young kid
on the phone.
1100
00:50:43,062 --> 00:50:44,629
Oh, shit.
1101
00:50:44,829 --> 00:50:48,676
You, turn around.
Put your hands on the car.
1102
00:50:49,024 --> 00:50:51,810
Gimme your left hand.
1103
00:50:52,462 --> 00:50:53,420
Morgan?!
1104
00:50:53,620 --> 00:50:55,727
Uh, hi, mom. Hi, dad.
1105
00:50:55,927 --> 00:50:59,600
Uh, you didn't have
to wait up for me.
1106
00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:01,471
Morgan, let me
give you the facts.
1107
00:51:01,671 --> 00:51:04,083
Sometimes children are
a liability in politics.
1108
00:51:04,283 --> 00:51:06,694
Look at all these
Washington brats.
1109
00:51:06,894 --> 00:51:07,956
Take your pick.
1110
00:51:08,156 --> 00:51:10,611
Nothing but drugs, sex,
automobile accidents,
1111
00:51:10,811 --> 00:51:12,352
Hollywood parties,
ad nauseum.
1112
00:51:12,552 --> 00:51:14,528
And I will not have
the son of my candidate
1113
00:51:14,728 --> 00:51:17,052
sniffing cocaine
or knocking up starlets
1114
00:51:17,252 --> 00:51:21,013
or being a guest host
on Saturday night live.
1115
00:51:21,213 --> 00:51:22,754
Ok, I know it was dumb.
1116
00:51:22,954 --> 00:51:25,060
I shouldn't have
taken the car,
1117
00:51:25,260 --> 00:51:26,192
and I'm sorry, ok?
1118
00:51:26,392 --> 00:51:29,369
Well, it's not
the end of the world.
1119
00:51:29,569 --> 00:51:30,631
Oh, sure, go ahead,
encourage him.
1120
00:51:30,831 --> 00:51:33,591
Maybe tomorrow night
he can steal the rolls.
1121
00:51:33,791 --> 00:51:36,637
You, young man,
are hereby grounded
1122
00:51:36,837 --> 00:51:37,812
until further notice.
1123
00:51:38,012 --> 00:51:39,509
You are not permitted
to leave this house,
1124
00:51:39,709 --> 00:51:43,339
even if it's on fire.
Understood?
1125
00:51:43,539 --> 00:51:45,385
Yes, mother.
1126
00:51:45,585 --> 00:51:50,085
Well, good. I'm finally
going to bed.
1127
00:52:09,627 --> 00:52:12,499
What?
1128
00:52:12,699 --> 00:52:15,328
Oh, sorry, champ.
Just trying to earn a living.
1129
00:52:15,528 --> 00:52:16,982
Could you
do me a favor, please?
1130
00:52:17,182 --> 00:52:20,463
Hand me those wire cutters
right down there.
1131
00:52:20,663 --> 00:52:22,640
Gimme a hand.
1132
00:52:29,647 --> 00:52:32,867
What are you
putting up in there?
1133
00:52:33,067 --> 00:52:34,869
This sucker here.
1134
00:52:35,069 --> 00:52:36,610
State of the art.
1135
00:52:36,810 --> 00:52:40,483
Saticon tube.
6 to 1 zoom.
1136
00:52:40,683 --> 00:52:44,226
Just about
see in the dark.
1137
00:52:47,534 --> 00:52:49,579
You better watch
your pud polishing,
1138
00:52:49,779 --> 00:52:51,712
if you catch my drift.
1139
00:52:51,912 --> 00:52:54,672
"Pud polishing."
1140
00:53:08,773 --> 00:53:09,948
Now, that speech-
1141
00:53:10,148 --> 00:53:12,472
Nancy, that is gonna
make or break
1142
00:53:12,672 --> 00:53:13,865
the entire campaign.
1143
00:53:14,065 --> 00:53:17,738
I'm gonna have live television,
live radio coverage.
1144
00:53:17,938 --> 00:53:19,174
Everybody in this state
1145
00:53:19,374 --> 00:53:21,002
is either gonna
be watching or listening
1146
00:53:21,202 --> 00:53:23,657
as the senator talks
to a small, intimate group
1147
00:53:23,857 --> 00:53:25,920
of friends and supporters
and family.
1148
00:53:26,120 --> 00:53:29,141
What would you say,
about 200 people or so?
1149
00:53:29,341 --> 00:53:30,403
That's terrific, Jay.
1150
00:53:30,603 --> 00:53:32,318
Thank you. They'll all
come to the home,
1151
00:53:32,518 --> 00:53:33,623
have a little
Christmas cheer.
1152
00:53:33,823 --> 00:53:35,756
Put everybody in the spirit
of giving, you mean.
1153
00:53:35,956 --> 00:53:37,279
Mom, I have
to talk to you.
1154
00:53:37,479 --> 00:53:39,673
That's a great
inspiration
1155
00:53:39,873 --> 00:53:40,674
right there.
1156
00:53:40,874 --> 00:53:42,241
The spirit
of giving.
1157
00:53:42,441 --> 00:53:43,372
Mom, it's real important.
1158
00:53:43,572 --> 00:53:45,592
You gotta let me off
restriction tonight.
1159
00:53:45,792 --> 00:53:46,724
Oh, no.
1160
00:53:46,924 --> 00:53:49,552
Mom, I promised somebody
very important
1161
00:53:49,752 --> 00:53:50,423
that I'd see them.
1162
00:53:50,623 --> 00:53:51,772
I'm sorry about
the car, ok,
1163
00:53:51,972 --> 00:53:53,774
but I'll pay for
the damages myself.
1164
00:53:53,974 --> 00:53:55,776
How do you propose
to do that,
1165
00:53:55,976 --> 00:53:56,951
hold up a 7-Eleven?
1166
00:53:58,083 --> 00:53:59,737
Well, I'll go to my
safety deposit box
1167
00:53:59,937 --> 00:54:01,608
and take out aunt Matilda's
coin collection.
1168
00:54:01,808 --> 00:54:03,566
Absolutely not.
1169
00:54:03,766 --> 00:54:06,656
I don't think that's
a very good idea.
1170
00:54:06,856 --> 00:54:07,353
Why not?
1171
00:54:07,553 --> 00:54:08,615
I know that your aunt
1172
00:54:08,815 --> 00:54:10,791
would have wanted you to
save that for college,
1173
00:54:10,991 --> 00:54:12,053
something
more substantial.
1174
00:54:12,253 --> 00:54:14,795
Then I'll get a job.
I'll work at a McDonald's
1175
00:54:14,995 --> 00:54:16,188
or a gas station
or something.
1176
00:54:16,388 --> 00:54:20,758
McDonald's? Over my dead,
withered, decomposed body.
1177
00:54:20,958 --> 00:54:22,716
Fantastic job, Jay.
1178
00:54:22,916 --> 00:54:23,848
Mom...
1179
00:54:24,048 --> 00:54:25,545
No. You will stay on
restriction tonight,
1180
00:54:25,745 --> 00:54:27,808
tomorrow night, and for
the rest of your young life.
1181
00:54:28,008 --> 00:54:32,030
Elephants and mothers,
Morgan, never forget.
1182
00:54:32,230 --> 00:54:36,208
Now bear down,
will ya, kid?
1183
00:54:40,473 --> 00:54:44,825
No, it's ok, Ivan.
It's just me.
1184
00:54:45,434 --> 00:54:49,656
Hi. How you doin'?
I say that right?
1185
00:54:49,856 --> 00:54:51,658
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Perfect.
1186
00:54:51,858 --> 00:54:53,138
Thank you.
1187
00:54:53,338 --> 00:54:55,401
How I'm doin'? For starters,
I've been grounded for life.
1188
00:54:55,601 --> 00:54:57,925
There are TV cameras
all over the house
1189
00:54:58,125 --> 00:55:00,798
watching my every move.
1190
00:55:00,998 --> 00:55:03,801
And I can't even
make a phone call
1191
00:55:04,001 --> 00:55:07,152
without the whole world
knowing about it.
1192
00:55:07,352 --> 00:55:10,895
Huh. It sounds like Russia.
1193
00:55:11,095 --> 00:55:12,722
Huh.
1194
00:55:30,958 --> 00:55:31,741
Hello.
1195
00:55:31,941 --> 00:55:33,004
It's me Morgan.
1196
00:55:33,204 --> 00:55:35,789
Perfect timing. I was
just on my way to work.
1197
00:55:35,989 --> 00:55:36,659
What's up?
1198
00:55:36,859 --> 00:55:38,096
Emily, I, uh,
I don't think
1199
00:55:38,296 --> 00:55:41,316
I'm gonna be able
to see you tonight.
1200
00:55:41,516 --> 00:55:42,535
Actually, I don't think
1201
00:55:42,735 --> 00:55:44,624
I'm gonna be able to see
you for a long time.
1202
00:55:44,824 --> 00:55:46,147
Why? What's going on?
1203
00:55:46,347 --> 00:55:51,500
My mother.
I'm gr-
1204
00:55:51,700 --> 00:55:55,156
my mother's father.
Uh, my grandfather.
1205
00:55:55,356 --> 00:55:58,943
It's his heart,
you know, it's, uh...
1206
00:55:59,143 --> 00:56:00,683
It's broken.
1207
00:56:00,883 --> 00:56:02,772
Anyway, I think i'm
gonna have to go away
1208
00:56:02,972 --> 00:56:04,296
for a long time.
1209
00:56:04,496 --> 00:56:06,167
Well, um, when
are you leaving?
1210
00:56:06,367 --> 00:56:07,647
Can I see you
before you go?
1211
00:56:07,847 --> 00:56:12,521
Uh, uh, no, I don't-
I don't think so.
1212
00:56:12,721 --> 00:56:14,872
I'm gonna be...
1213
00:56:16,177 --> 00:56:18,788
I'm gonna be
real busy.
1214
00:56:19,659 --> 00:56:22,227
Are you ok? I mean,
you sound a little bit
1215
00:56:22,427 --> 00:56:23,663
weirded out or something.
1216
00:56:23,863 --> 00:56:27,754
Oh, no, no,
everything's great.
1217
00:56:27,954 --> 00:56:30,235
I'm just a little
worried, that's all.
1218
00:56:30,435 --> 00:56:32,672
So, uh, watch out
for those
1219
00:56:32,872 --> 00:56:35,675
killer tomatoes,
will you?
1220
00:57:02,049 --> 00:57:05,096
Mind if I join you?
1221
00:57:06,401 --> 00:57:08,926
Don't worry. I wont tell
if you won't.
1222
00:57:11,102 --> 00:57:12,407
It's a deal.
1223
00:57:12,607 --> 00:57:15,236
So, uh, when did mom
get on this
1224
00:57:15,436 --> 00:57:16,803
vegetarian kick, anyway?
1225
00:57:17,003 --> 00:57:20,589
About 6 months ago.
1226
00:57:20,789 --> 00:57:22,940
She went to see this
holistic manicurist
1227
00:57:23,140 --> 00:57:24,593
who told her that eating
meat had given her
1228
00:57:24,793 --> 00:57:27,466
the fingernails of
a 90-year-old woman.
1229
00:57:27,666 --> 00:57:28,467
That was it.
1230
00:57:28,667 --> 00:57:30,904
No more meat in
the house period.
1231
00:57:31,104 --> 00:57:33,863
God, when mom gets her
mind set on something...
1232
00:57:34,063 --> 00:57:36,301
Mother's not
the easiest person
1233
00:57:36,501 --> 00:57:37,955
in the world to live with.
1234
00:57:38,155 --> 00:57:39,957
But...
1235
00:57:40,157 --> 00:57:42,437
We wouldn't be where
we are without her.
1236
00:57:42,637 --> 00:57:45,745
Where exactly are we?
1237
00:57:45,945 --> 00:57:48,661
Son, we're in the senate.
1238
00:57:48,861 --> 00:57:51,794
The United States senate.
1239
00:57:53,100 --> 00:57:55,015
Dad, you know...
1240
00:57:55,215 --> 00:57:56,843
This is the first
sandwich we've shared
1241
00:57:57,043 --> 00:57:59,541
since before
I went to school.
1242
00:57:59,741 --> 00:58:02,631
I mean, before you
even ran for office.
1243
00:58:02,831 --> 00:58:04,633
Don't you remember
the football games
1244
00:58:04,833 --> 00:58:05,504
we used to go to?
1245
00:58:05,704 --> 00:58:07,245
The cabin in the country
1246
00:58:07,445 --> 00:58:08,507
where you taught me
how to ski.
1247
00:58:08,707 --> 00:58:11,379
I mean, we used to go
up there every weekend.
1248
00:58:11,579 --> 00:58:12,598
Just you, me and mom.
1249
00:58:12,798 --> 00:58:15,035
I mean, I thought we
were pretty happy then.
1250
00:58:15,235 --> 00:58:17,037
I don't know, morg.
1251
00:58:17,237 --> 00:58:20,084
I think we're
pretty happy now.
1252
00:58:20,867 --> 00:58:26,090
Yeah. That's just
what I thought.
1253
00:58:26,290 --> 00:58:27,482
Hey.
1254
00:58:27,682 --> 00:58:30,790
Aren't you supposed
to be grounded?
1255
00:58:30,990 --> 00:58:34,054
Yeah.
1256
00:58:34,254 --> 00:58:37,318
Better get back
to my cell.
1257
00:58:43,759 --> 00:58:45,326
Dad...
1258
00:58:46,371 --> 00:58:48,025
I'm really glad
things worked out
1259
00:58:48,225 --> 00:58:50,114
so well for you.
1260
00:58:50,314 --> 00:58:53,943
Thank you, son.
1261
00:59:25,149 --> 00:59:27,107
Oh, come in, Morgan.
1262
00:59:31,198 --> 00:59:33,157
Hi, mom.
Uh, I was, uh-
1263
00:59:33,357 --> 00:59:35,289
don't tell me, darling.
I know what happened.
1264
00:59:35,489 --> 00:59:36,638
There was a spaceship
that landed
1265
00:59:36,838 --> 00:59:37,726
with little
green men in it,
1266
00:59:37,926 --> 00:59:39,032
and they attacked you
with hatchets,
1267
00:59:39,232 --> 00:59:41,034
and then they sucked
you out of the house
1268
00:59:41,234 --> 00:59:42,079
through the mail slot,
1269
00:59:42,279 --> 00:59:43,384
and then they beamed
you back again.
1270
00:59:43,584 --> 00:59:45,343
It's a good try.
It's a good try.
1271
00:59:45,543 --> 00:59:47,736
They actually sucked me out
through the doggy door,
1272
00:59:47,936 --> 00:59:50,826
but you were very close.
Very close.
1273
00:59:51,026 --> 00:59:56,528
This is not funny,
Morgan.
1274
01:00:16,156 --> 01:00:17,592
Ivan, where'd
you put my-
1275
01:00:17,792 --> 01:00:19,116
hey, dude.
1276
01:00:23,642 --> 01:00:25,034
What's going on?
1277
01:00:25,234 --> 01:00:27,559
Uh, nothing.
1278
01:00:27,759 --> 01:00:28,821
How did you get in?
1279
01:00:29,021 --> 01:00:32,912
I rang the doorbell
and some guy answered it.
1280
01:00:33,112 --> 01:00:34,479
Happens all the time.
1281
01:00:34,679 --> 01:00:35,915
I didn't really
understand him,
1282
01:00:36,115 --> 01:00:39,701
but on the way up, I think
he tried to sell me a condo.
1283
01:00:39,901 --> 01:00:42,617
That's Ivan.
1284
01:00:44,402 --> 01:00:48,188
You want to know
how I found you?
1285
01:00:50,669 --> 01:00:54,063
Washington's a small town.
1286
01:00:56,457 --> 01:01:01,419
This is a really,
really great house.
1287
01:01:02,202 --> 01:01:05,292
How's your grandfather?
1288
01:01:05,492 --> 01:01:07,120
Your grandfather?
1289
01:01:07,320 --> 01:01:12,560
Oh. I'm sorry, uh,
he's a little better.
1290
01:01:12,760 --> 01:01:15,476
That's good.
1291
01:01:15,676 --> 01:01:19,176
Um, well I really just
came by to say, you know,
1292
01:01:19,376 --> 01:01:20,525
hi and good-bye.
1293
01:01:20,725 --> 01:01:22,309
I thought we were gonna
go skiing sometime,
1294
01:01:22,509 --> 01:01:24,703
but when you called me
yesterday, I just-
1295
01:01:24,903 --> 01:01:28,533
it just didn't look like it
was ever going to happen.
1296
01:01:28,733 --> 01:01:30,187
So...
1297
01:01:31,100 --> 01:01:33,277
Good-bye, Morgan.
1298
01:01:37,281 --> 01:01:39,500
Emily.
1299
01:01:44,679 --> 01:01:47,029
Are your folks home?
1300
01:01:47,229 --> 01:01:50,119
Uh, no.
1301
01:01:50,319 --> 01:01:52,513
Actually, they're out.
1302
01:01:52,713 --> 01:01:55,995
Do you have any food?
1303
01:01:58,389 --> 01:01:59,738
Yeah.
1304
01:01:59,938 --> 01:02:02,349
Uh, sorry, this is
all I could find.
1305
01:02:02,549 --> 01:02:05,744
Anything. It's food.
I'm starving.
1306
01:02:06,788 --> 01:02:09,922
So you're pretty rich,
huh?
1307
01:02:10,618 --> 01:02:13,230
They are. I'm not.
1308
01:02:13,430 --> 01:02:14,666
All I have is
500 silver dollars
1309
01:02:14,866 --> 01:02:18,322
in a coin collection
that my aunt left me.
1310
01:02:18,522 --> 01:02:22,369
You see, my mom's dad
was a big, uh...
1311
01:02:22,569 --> 01:02:26,547
I mean, is, a big
robber-baron type.
1312
01:02:26,747 --> 01:02:27,766
What's he into?
1313
01:02:27,966 --> 01:02:30,551
Oh, all sorts of things.
1314
01:02:30,751 --> 01:02:32,640
This is really good.
What is it?
1315
01:02:32,840 --> 01:02:34,729
Dog food, mainly.
1316
01:02:37,036 --> 01:02:38,124
Oh, oh, no, no.
1317
01:02:38,324 --> 01:02:40,779
That's my-that's
my mom's eggplant.
1318
01:02:40,979 --> 01:02:43,521
Uh, dog food is, uh,
how my mom's dad
1319
01:02:43,721 --> 01:02:45,871
made all his money.
1320
01:02:46,071 --> 01:02:47,481
You see,
I'm supposed to say
1321
01:02:47,681 --> 01:02:49,657
that the family fortune
came from horses.
1322
01:02:49,857 --> 01:02:51,616
You know, like tallyho
and off to the races
1323
01:02:51,816 --> 01:02:52,791
and all that crap.
1324
01:02:52,991 --> 01:02:54,532
Well, the only horses
my family ever owned
1325
01:02:54,732 --> 01:02:55,924
were the ones that
they chopped up
1326
01:02:56,124 --> 01:02:57,317
and put in little cans.
Ew.
1327
01:02:57,517 --> 01:03:01,321
See, my mom's real into
making the right impression,
1328
01:03:01,521 --> 01:03:04,193
and she's real hard
to understand sometimes.
1329
01:03:04,393 --> 01:03:06,413
Oh, anyway you
look at it, I mean,
1330
01:03:06,613 --> 01:03:07,675
raising parents is a drag.
1331
01:03:07,875 --> 01:03:08,633
Especially mothers.
1332
01:03:08,833 --> 01:03:11,113
I mean, it's taken me
16 years
1333
01:03:11,313 --> 01:03:13,638
of Patience, understanding,
1334
01:03:13,838 --> 01:03:15,161
a whole lot of screaming
and yelling,
1335
01:03:15,361 --> 01:03:16,989
I mean, just to get her
where she is now.
1336
01:03:17,189 --> 01:03:19,339
Probably take me a whole
'nother 16 years
1337
01:03:19,539 --> 01:03:20,688
just to get it right.
1338
01:03:20,888 --> 01:03:22,124
But it's worth it.
1339
01:03:22,324 --> 01:03:24,431
Whoa.
1340
01:03:30,785 --> 01:03:34,267
Oh! Whoa!
1341
01:03:35,921 --> 01:03:37,705
Smooth move!
1342
01:03:37,905 --> 01:03:39,751
Oh, my god.
1343
01:03:40,795 --> 01:03:41,535
Whoo!
1344
01:03:41,735 --> 01:03:44,364
You look good
in water.
1345
01:03:44,625 --> 01:03:48,760
Oh, my god. I don't
believe this.
1346
01:03:52,851 --> 01:03:57,464
Hey, takes a licking,
keeps on ticking.
1347
01:03:57,664 --> 01:03:59,031
I'm so wet.
1348
01:03:59,231 --> 01:04:00,772
Oh, it's cold out here.
1349
01:04:00,972 --> 01:04:03,035
Come on. Come on.
1350
01:04:03,235 --> 01:04:04,776
Ok, I'm coming.
1351
01:04:04,976 --> 01:04:06,995
I'm freezing.
1352
01:04:22,707 --> 01:04:25,013
I'm freezing.
1353
01:04:26,624 --> 01:04:28,321
Oh, that's
the stupidest thing
1354
01:04:28,521 --> 01:04:30,976
that's ever happened to me
in my entire life.
1355
01:04:31,176 --> 01:04:32,107
Ooh, I'm freezing.
1356
01:04:32,307 --> 01:04:34,371
Jesus Christ, my toes
are the same color
1357
01:04:34,571 --> 01:04:35,415
as your uniform.
1358
01:04:35,615 --> 01:04:37,591
Oh, I can't even
feel my toes.
1359
01:04:37,791 --> 01:04:40,420
Good thing we went
to the great expense
1360
01:04:40,620 --> 01:04:42,857
of having the pool
heated.
1361
01:04:43,057 --> 01:04:46,687
You could have told me that.
You didn't have to push me in.
1362
01:04:46,887 --> 01:04:48,820
I'm gonna take a shower.
1363
01:04:49,020 --> 01:04:49,864
What are you gonna do,
1364
01:04:50,064 --> 01:04:51,736
just stand there
and catch pneumonia?
1365
01:04:59,787 --> 01:05:05,227
Thank you, god.
Thank you, god.
1366
01:05:10,842 --> 01:05:11,756
Aah!
1367
01:05:11,956 --> 01:05:15,716
Out of my way.
I need a shampoo.
1368
01:05:19,633 --> 01:05:20,852
Need a shampoo?
1369
01:05:21,052 --> 01:05:23,202
Well, here comes Jorge
1370
01:05:23,402 --> 01:05:25,900
your transylvanian
hairdresser.
1371
01:05:29,077 --> 01:05:31,471
This is terrific.
Oh, I gotta-
1372
01:05:37,695 --> 01:05:39,697
And you never actually
see the knife
1373
01:05:39,897 --> 01:05:42,003
touch Janet Leigh's
body.
1374
01:05:43,178 --> 01:05:45,877
You know what? It took
Hitchcock 7 days
1375
01:05:46,077 --> 01:05:47,095
to shoot that
shower scene.
1376
01:05:47,295 --> 01:05:49,228
And it's only on film
for, like, 3 seconds.
1377
01:05:49,428 --> 01:05:50,925
You like that part
where she screamed
1378
01:05:51,125 --> 01:05:53,101
and the violins came in?
1379
01:05:54,799 --> 01:05:55,887
Aah!
1380
01:05:56,087 --> 01:05:57,802
Aah!
Aah!
1381
01:05:58,002 --> 01:06:00,369
Aah!
1382
01:06:00,569 --> 01:06:04,156
Mom-mom,
close the curtains.
1383
01:06:05,026 --> 01:06:08,377
Introduce me please,
Morgan.
1384
01:06:08,577 --> 01:06:09,857
Mom.
1385
01:06:10,057 --> 01:06:12,381
Allow me to introduce
myself.
1386
01:06:12,581 --> 01:06:13,948
I am Nancy Stewart.
1387
01:06:14,148 --> 01:06:15,123
And whoever you are,
1388
01:06:15,323 --> 01:06:16,864
you have precisely
60 seconds
1389
01:06:17,064 --> 01:06:17,778
to get out of this house
1390
01:06:17,978 --> 01:06:20,607
before I call
the vice squad.
1391
01:06:24,393 --> 01:06:26,526
Em-Emily, I'm sorry.
1392
01:06:26,726 --> 01:06:28,702
Morgan!
1393
01:06:33,968 --> 01:06:34,926
Emily!
1394
01:06:35,126 --> 01:06:36,057
Morgan!
1395
01:06:36,257 --> 01:06:36,884
Emily!
1396
01:06:37,084 --> 01:06:38,233
Morgan!
Emily!
1397
01:06:38,433 --> 01:06:39,408
Morgan!
1398
01:06:39,608 --> 01:06:40,758
Emily!
1399
01:06:40,958 --> 01:06:44,065
Emily, come back.
1400
01:06:44,265 --> 01:06:45,240
Emily!
1401
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:46,241
Morgan!
1402
01:06:46,441 --> 01:06:48,548
Morgan, come back here
right now!
1403
01:06:48,748 --> 01:06:50,419
Morgan!
1404
01:06:50,619 --> 01:06:53,727
Morgan! Don't you dare.
1405
01:06:54,423 --> 01:06:56,338
Emily!
1406
01:06:56,538 --> 01:06:59,733
Emily, wait!
1407
01:06:59,933 --> 01:07:01,953
Damn.
1408
01:07:12,093 --> 01:07:13,921
Hi, mom.
1409
01:07:14,121 --> 01:07:16,924
Mrs. Whitewood,
how are you?
1410
01:07:17,124 --> 01:07:19,797
Mr. Whitewood,
looking good.
1411
01:07:19,997 --> 01:07:22,843
Oh, uh, how's Heather?
1412
01:07:25,411 --> 01:07:29,284
Yeah. Ok.
1413
01:07:31,852 --> 01:07:33,071
Oh, tilly, I tell you,
1414
01:07:33,271 --> 01:07:34,289
these progressive schools.
1415
01:07:34,489 --> 01:07:35,682
Who says Republicans
don't know
1416
01:07:35,882 --> 01:07:37,118
how to have fun,
huh?
1417
01:07:37,318 --> 01:07:38,511
Ha ha.
1418
01:08:05,146 --> 01:08:06,452
Morgan!
1419
01:08:06,652 --> 01:08:09,324
Morgan, I simply do not
understand this behavior.
1420
01:08:09,524 --> 01:08:11,500
Tonight I have suffered
the worst humiliation
1421
01:08:11,700 --> 01:08:12,806
of my entire life.
1422
01:08:13,006 --> 01:08:16,331
You leave me with only
2 words to say...
1423
01:08:16,531 --> 01:08:18,682
Military school.
1424
01:08:20,727 --> 01:08:23,687
Well, I'm not going!
1425
01:08:23,887 --> 01:08:27,081
Oh, yes, you are.
1426
01:08:27,778 --> 01:08:30,128
And I know just the place.
1427
01:08:30,328 --> 01:08:33,000
My old Alma mater,
milhouse military academy.
1428
01:08:33,200 --> 01:08:36,787
You're the only mistake I made
in this campaign, Morgan.
1429
01:08:36,987 --> 01:08:41,095
Maybe milhouse can
make a man out of you.
1430
01:08:41,295 --> 01:08:44,446
Please, Jay,
don't make me go.
1431
01:08:44,646 --> 01:08:45,752
Talk to mom.
You're the only one
1432
01:08:45,952 --> 01:08:47,667
who can convince her
to let me stay.
1433
01:08:47,867 --> 01:08:49,103
I'll change. I know
you don't like me,
1434
01:08:49,303 --> 01:08:50,931
but I'll change, ok?
I'll do anything.
1435
01:08:51,131 --> 01:08:51,889
Anything you want.
1436
01:08:52,089 --> 01:08:53,455
You want me
to take out Heather?
1437
01:08:53,655 --> 01:08:56,154
I'll even
take out Heather.
1438
01:09:01,899 --> 01:09:04,553
Oh, you're gonna like
general fenton.
1439
01:09:06,077 --> 01:09:09,994
He knows how to deal
with brats like you.
1440
01:09:10,734 --> 01:09:13,084
Jay, please.
1441
01:09:19,307 --> 01:09:21,962
Thanks, Jay.
1442
01:09:50,861 --> 01:09:52,993
General fenton.
1443
01:09:53,193 --> 01:09:54,429
Oh, it's been so long.
1444
01:09:54,629 --> 01:09:56,170
Jay, it's good
to see you, my boy.
1445
01:09:56,370 --> 01:09:57,911
I'm glad you're here.
1446
01:09:58,111 --> 01:09:59,173
Come right in,
please, sir.Thank you.
1447
01:09:59,373 --> 01:10:03,134
Come right in, gentlemen,
cadets, soldiers.
1448
01:10:03,334 --> 01:10:05,963
Yes, sir. Whoo.
1449
01:10:09,053 --> 01:10:11,272
As my boy Jay knows from
firsthand experience-
1450
01:10:11,472 --> 01:10:13,797
oh, by the way, Jay,
how long has it been?
1451
01:10:13,997 --> 01:10:14,885
Oh, that was the, uh...
1452
01:10:15,085 --> 01:10:16,713
That was the class
of '64, sir.
1453
01:10:16,913 --> 01:10:17,670
The class of '64.
1454
01:10:17,870 --> 01:10:19,672
Oh, that was a class.
Yes, sir.
1455
01:10:19,872 --> 01:10:22,022
But, you see, at milhouse
we hate failure.
1456
01:10:22,222 --> 01:10:26,897
We eradicate failure.
We rip it out by the roots.
1457
01:10:27,097 --> 01:10:28,159
When I get through
with your son,
1458
01:10:28,359 --> 01:10:30,683
he'll be capable of
defeating any enemy,
1459
01:10:30,883 --> 01:10:33,947
any time, any place,
be it foreign or domestic.
1460
01:10:34,147 --> 01:10:36,254
Nancy: Morgan is on a
strict vegetarian diet.
1461
01:10:36,454 --> 01:10:40,693
He's not to eat meat
under any circumstances.
1462
01:10:49,658 --> 01:10:51,225
The problems you're
facing with your son
1463
01:10:51,425 --> 01:10:53,793
are problems we face
every day at milhouse.
1464
01:10:53,993 --> 01:10:56,535
Let me assure you,
I mean...
1465
01:11:00,060 --> 01:11:01,409
We have
a trained staff
1466
01:11:01,609 --> 01:11:02,802
of professionally
trained people
1467
01:11:03,002 --> 01:11:04,630
who handle this
all the time.
1468
01:11:04,830 --> 01:11:05,979
So I can assure you
1469
01:11:06,179 --> 01:11:09,113
there's nothing
out of the ordinary...
1470
01:11:10,375 --> 01:11:12,159
We apply the right
approach.
1471
01:11:12,359 --> 01:11:15,946
You may feel that it's
old-fashioned, but it works.
1472
01:11:23,605 --> 01:11:27,348
I would say that
this is not a problem.
1473
01:11:27,548 --> 01:11:29,437
Let's go, men.
1474
01:11:36,096 --> 01:11:38,011
Oh, good. Glad to see
you're packed.
1475
01:11:38,211 --> 01:11:39,534
General fenton is here.
1476
01:11:39,734 --> 01:11:41,449
Wrong way.
1477
01:11:42,146 --> 01:11:43,582
Morgan!
1478
01:11:45,410 --> 01:11:47,978
Oh, god!
1479
01:11:50,371 --> 01:11:53,244
Oh, my god! Morgan!
1480
01:11:53,444 --> 01:11:54,898
Morgan!
1481
01:11:55,098 --> 01:11:55,986
Tom: Morgan!
1482
01:11:56,186 --> 01:11:57,248
Morgan, don't you
dare go down there!
1483
01:11:57,448 --> 01:11:58,771
Morgan, you'll
hurt yourself!
1484
01:11:58,971 --> 01:12:00,729
Oh, my god, Tom,
look what he's doing!
1485
01:12:00,929 --> 01:12:01,774
Damn it!
Morgan!He's getting away!
1486
01:12:01,974 --> 01:12:04,037
God damn it, do
something, general!
1487
01:12:04,237 --> 01:12:05,343
Get him!
1488
01:12:05,543 --> 01:12:07,432
♪ Lord if I won't die
1489
01:12:07,632 --> 01:12:09,303
♪ dead and gone
1490
01:12:09,503 --> 01:12:15,657
♪ gone
1491
01:12:16,223 --> 01:12:19,052
♪ keep on riding
1492
01:12:20,488 --> 01:12:23,709
♪ keep on riding
1493
01:12:33,458 --> 01:12:37,375
Emily, it's me Morgan.
1494
01:12:37,575 --> 01:12:39,159
There's nobody home.
1495
01:12:39,359 --> 01:12:42,380
Oh, come on, Emily.
I-I'm sorry.
1496
01:12:42,580 --> 01:12:44,904
You lied to me.
All that stuff about
1497
01:12:45,104 --> 01:12:47,907
your parents being
so cool.
1498
01:12:48,107 --> 01:12:51,041
You probably don't even
have a grandfather.
1499
01:12:51,241 --> 01:12:53,521
Ok, I shouldn't
have lied.
1500
01:12:53,721 --> 01:12:55,915
Then why did you?
1501
01:12:56,115 --> 01:13:00,485
'Cause the truth sucks.
1502
01:13:02,922 --> 01:13:05,794
'Cause my parents
and I are strangers.
1503
01:13:05,994 --> 01:13:10,147
We just have
the same last name.
1504
01:13:16,936 --> 01:13:18,677
I was shipped off
to boarding school
1505
01:13:18,877 --> 01:13:20,897
when I was 10.
1506
01:13:22,159 --> 01:13:23,377
And I was dumb enough
to think
1507
01:13:23,577 --> 01:13:24,857
if I could get myself
kicked out enough times
1508
01:13:25,057 --> 01:13:27,207
that eventually they'd
run out of schools
1509
01:13:27,407 --> 01:13:30,428
and have to
take me home.
1510
01:13:31,429 --> 01:13:35,128
You know what
really sucks is...
1511
01:13:35,328 --> 01:13:38,218
They never did.
1512
01:13:38,418 --> 01:13:42,570
I went through
8 schools in 6 years.
1513
01:13:42,770 --> 01:13:43,702
Then all of a sudden,
they call me up.
1514
01:13:43,902 --> 01:13:45,399
They said they wanted
me to come home.
1515
01:13:45,599 --> 01:13:48,837
It was a joke.
They didn't want me.
1516
01:13:49,037 --> 01:13:51,231
They wanted a cardboard
cutout labeled "kid"
1517
01:13:51,431 --> 01:13:54,278
for their campaign
poster.
1518
01:13:55,018 --> 01:13:58,021
I used to pray that
my dad would resign
1519
01:13:58,221 --> 01:14:00,327
or lose the election.
1520
01:14:00,527 --> 01:14:04,157
Now I don't even care.
1521
01:14:04,357 --> 01:14:06,986
So, uh...
1522
01:14:07,186 --> 01:14:09,119
So what I came for
was to...
1523
01:14:09,319 --> 01:14:14,124
To say good-bye,
'cause I'm leaving.
1524
01:14:14,324 --> 01:14:16,517
I'm running away.
1525
01:14:22,741 --> 01:14:26,092
Can I drive you somewhere?
1526
01:14:43,370 --> 01:14:46,330
Senator, I need
to speak to you.
1527
01:14:46,530 --> 01:14:47,331
Not now, Jay.
1528
01:14:47,531 --> 01:14:48,636
They're checking
all the hospitals,
1529
01:14:48,836 --> 01:14:51,161
halfway houses,
the morgues.
1530
01:14:51,361 --> 01:14:52,901
I'm expecting 200 guests
1531
01:14:53,101 --> 01:14:55,034
for a festive
press conference.
1532
01:14:55,234 --> 01:14:56,122
I'm getting a migraine.
1533
01:14:56,322 --> 01:14:59,343
He's probably just
gone off somewhere
1534
01:14:59,543 --> 01:15:01,823
to work out his problems.
1535
01:15:02,023 --> 01:15:04,696
This whole idea about
military school
1536
01:15:04,896 --> 01:15:06,089
is a terrible mistake.
1537
01:15:06,289 --> 01:15:07,177
Uh, senator...
1538
01:15:07,377 --> 01:15:08,439
Jay, can't it wait?
1539
01:15:08,639 --> 01:15:11,094
No, I'm afraid
it can't, sir.
1540
01:15:11,294 --> 01:15:14,706
Oh, Jay, really,
you should know better.
1541
01:15:14,906 --> 01:15:18,144
Oh, that's right,
that's right.
1542
01:15:18,344 --> 01:15:21,887
You don't like
smoking in the house.
1543
01:15:22,087 --> 01:15:24,542
I'm awfully sorry.
1544
01:15:24,742 --> 01:15:28,067
But, uh, under
the circumstances...
1545
01:15:28,267 --> 01:15:30,939
Under what
circumstances?
1546
01:15:41,428 --> 01:15:42,777
Emily: What are we
doing here anyway?
1547
01:15:42,977 --> 01:15:44,388
What do you usually
do at banks?
1548
01:15:44,588 --> 01:15:45,606
You get dollars.
1549
01:15:45,806 --> 01:15:47,217
Well, can't you write
a check or something?
1550
01:15:47,417 --> 01:15:48,914
No, because our old
pal Jay decided
1551
01:15:49,114 --> 01:15:50,220
that aunt mathilda's
coin collection
1552
01:15:50,420 --> 01:15:54,398
would be better off
in a safe deposit box.
1553
01:15:54,598 --> 01:15:56,095
Look, instead of
running away,
1554
01:15:56,295 --> 01:15:57,705
you can just come
stay at our house.
1555
01:15:57,905 --> 01:15:58,880
I mean, my parents
loved you.
1556
01:15:59,080 --> 01:16:01,274
Oh, great, I can
bunk with Billy.
1557
01:16:01,474 --> 01:16:03,581
Ok, scratch that idea.
1558
01:16:03,781 --> 01:16:04,712
I guess it's your life
1559
01:16:04,912 --> 01:16:06,236
and you know what
you're doing with it.
1560
01:16:06,436 --> 01:16:08,934
I can show you to the
vault now, Mr. Stewart.
1561
01:16:09,134 --> 01:16:10,109
Please sign here.
1562
01:16:10,309 --> 01:16:11,850
Thank you.
1563
01:16:19,292 --> 01:16:22,339
Holy shit.
1564
01:16:22,539 --> 01:16:26,647
Maybe they compounded
the interest.
1565
01:16:27,866 --> 01:16:29,259
In my pocket,
I have the key
1566
01:16:29,459 --> 01:16:31,870
to Morgan's
safe deposit box
1567
01:16:32,070 --> 01:16:35,613
in which I have
placed $500,000
1568
01:16:35,813 --> 01:16:38,485
in marked $100 bills...
1569
01:16:39,182 --> 01:16:40,357
From your campaign fund.
1570
01:16:40,557 --> 01:16:42,750
The box also contains
the records
1571
01:16:42,950 --> 01:16:45,318
of how the contributions
were laundered.
1572
01:16:45,518 --> 01:16:48,191
All of which were co-signed
and authorized
1573
01:16:48,391 --> 01:16:51,542
by Nancy
and Morgan Stewart.
1574
01:16:55,415 --> 01:16:59,027
I must say, senator,
you have some family.
1575
01:16:59,227 --> 01:17:00,638
I mean, they
couldn't have been
1576
01:17:00,838 --> 01:17:02,509
more help to me
if they'd been part
1577
01:17:02,709 --> 01:17:05,208
of the scam themselves.
1578
01:17:05,773 --> 01:17:08,559
Did you sign
something for Jay?
1579
01:17:09,342 --> 01:17:11,866
God, Tom, you know, I sign
things all the time-
1580
01:17:12,066 --> 01:17:13,346
did youjay has been
sign this?Running
1581
01:17:13,546 --> 01:17:15,696
this campaign
for US. I'm given...
1582
01:17:17,220 --> 01:17:20,266
I can't begin to read
each and every word.
1583
01:17:20,466 --> 01:17:22,094
This is senator
Stewart's office.
1584
01:17:22,294 --> 01:17:23,139
Man on telephone:
It's ernemann.
1585
01:17:23,339 --> 01:17:26,229
Ah, yes, yes. I'll
take care of that.
1586
01:17:26,429 --> 01:17:28,405
One second, please.
1587
01:17:29,145 --> 01:17:33,410
Excuse me, folks.
Minor detail.
1588
01:17:36,935 --> 01:17:37,892
I'm sorry.
1589
01:17:38,092 --> 01:17:40,547
We have to find out
what happened.
1590
01:17:40,747 --> 01:17:42,201
Yeah. Now listen,
first of all-
1591
01:17:42,401 --> 01:17:43,420
we got big trouble.
It's an emergency.
1592
01:17:43,620 --> 01:17:45,509
The Stewart boy came
in here and cleared out
1593
01:17:45,709 --> 01:17:46,597
the safe deposit box.
1594
01:17:46,797 --> 01:17:47,598
Jay, he had the key.
1595
01:17:47,798 --> 01:17:49,426
What-what do you mean
had the key?
1596
01:17:49,626 --> 01:17:53,473
That's impossible. I got
the key right here.
1597
01:17:57,912 --> 01:18:00,611
Why didn't you
stop him, you idiot?
1598
01:18:00,811 --> 01:18:02,613
I had my own
receipt book in there
1599
01:18:02,813 --> 01:18:03,657
along with the money.
1600
01:18:03,857 --> 01:18:06,225
I just got back
from my lunch hour.
1601
01:18:06,425 --> 01:18:07,400
Jay, you know
I'm hypoglycemic
1602
01:18:07,600 --> 01:18:09,446
and have to eat
precisely at noon.
1603
01:18:09,646 --> 01:18:10,969
I don't think
they care very much
1604
01:18:11,169 --> 01:18:12,231
about that in prison,
ernemann.
1605
01:18:12,431 --> 01:18:13,928
And that's exactly
where we're gonna be
1606
01:18:14,128 --> 01:18:15,408
if you don't get
that money
1607
01:18:15,608 --> 01:18:16,540
and those files back!
1608
01:18:16,740 --> 01:18:18,498
Well, you don't
have to shout.
1609
01:18:18,698 --> 01:18:21,153
You fruitcake.
1610
01:18:21,353 --> 01:18:24,722
The same to you
and your mother.
1611
01:18:24,922 --> 01:18:25,940
What?
1612
01:18:26,140 --> 01:18:28,204
Here are the whitewoods.
1613
01:18:28,404 --> 01:18:29,161
They're all here.
1614
01:18:29,361 --> 01:18:30,293
All the names of
the contributors
1615
01:18:30,493 --> 01:18:31,903
and receipts for all
the contributions
1616
01:18:32,103 --> 01:18:33,165
to my father's campaign.
1617
01:18:33,365 --> 01:18:34,471
I hate to say this,
but it looks like
1618
01:18:34,671 --> 01:18:36,603
your parents are
pulling a scam.
1619
01:18:36,803 --> 01:18:37,952
Well, my family
has plenty of money.
1620
01:18:38,152 --> 01:18:39,519
And besides, it's too
late in the campaign
1621
01:18:39,719 --> 01:18:40,607
to use any
of this stuff.
1622
01:18:40,807 --> 01:18:42,130
My family may be
a lot of things.
1623
01:18:42,330 --> 01:18:43,958
They are not crooks.
1624
01:18:44,158 --> 01:18:45,090
No, this has to be Jay.
1625
01:18:45,290 --> 01:18:47,135
He had the key to
the safe deposit box,
1626
01:18:47,335 --> 01:18:50,051
and these receipts are not
in my dad's handwriting.
1627
01:18:50,251 --> 01:18:54,055
But why? I cannot
figure that out.
1628
01:18:54,255 --> 01:18:56,275
I mean, if this got out,
it could ruin my dad,
1629
01:18:56,475 --> 01:18:57,624
especially right now.
1630
01:18:57,824 --> 01:18:59,452
Well, I don't see why you're
getting so bummed out.
1631
01:18:59,652 --> 01:19:01,019
I mean, if you
look at it,
1632
01:19:01,219 --> 01:19:02,150
it's kind of what
you wanted, right?
1633
01:19:02,350 --> 01:19:04,979
I mean, your dad getting
out of politics.
1634
01:19:05,179 --> 01:19:06,154
No, not this way.
1635
01:19:06,354 --> 01:19:09,201
Listen, I gotta make
a stop, but come on.
1636
01:19:09,401 --> 01:19:10,724
Where are we going?
1637
01:19:10,924 --> 01:19:13,205
I'm going home.
1638
01:19:23,433 --> 01:19:26,653
I'll make it very simple
for you, senator.
1639
01:19:26,853 --> 01:19:29,787
Tonight, while the entire
state of Virginia
1640
01:19:29,987 --> 01:19:31,136
watches and listens,
1641
01:19:31,336 --> 01:19:35,488
you're going to very quietly
and with great dignity
1642
01:19:35,688 --> 01:19:38,578
withdraw from the race.
1643
01:19:40,406 --> 01:19:42,190
Is this some
kind of joke?
1644
01:19:42,390 --> 01:19:43,627
Wishful thinking, senator.
1645
01:19:43,827 --> 01:19:49,285
First, we leak news of
the missing money to the press.
1646
01:19:49,485 --> 01:19:51,809
Then a photostatted copy
of the bank document
1647
01:19:52,009 --> 01:19:55,247
opening the account
will be mailed anonymously.
1648
01:19:55,447 --> 01:19:57,293
Do you want me to go on?
1649
01:19:57,493 --> 01:19:59,382
Why are you
doing this?
1650
01:19:59,582 --> 01:20:04,822
Well, it all comes down
to money, senator.
1651
01:20:05,518 --> 01:20:08,173
And I'm afraid
the other side pays more.
1652
01:20:08,373 --> 01:20:12,743
Now, I think you both should
get dressed for the party.
1653
01:20:12,943 --> 01:20:17,008
All your lovely guests
will be arriving soon.
1654
01:20:25,408 --> 01:20:26,583
Morgan: Roadblock.
1655
01:20:26,783 --> 01:20:29,325
Pull over, pull over.
1656
01:20:38,812 --> 01:20:41,206
Go ahead, sir.
1657
01:20:41,406 --> 01:20:43,556
Maybe we should
come back another time.
1658
01:20:43,756 --> 01:20:46,516
Your mother can't
really handle surprises.
1659
01:20:46,716 --> 01:20:47,734
No shit.
1660
01:20:47,934 --> 01:20:50,868
Ok, give me your jacket
and your glasses.
1661
01:20:51,068 --> 01:20:53,044
And all I got to do
is get to my dad
1662
01:20:53,244 --> 01:20:54,219
before the press conference.
1663
01:20:54,419 --> 01:20:55,394
I can't believe
you're doing this.
1664
01:20:55,594 --> 01:20:58,049
I know it's feeble,
but it's all they had.
1665
01:20:58,249 --> 01:21:00,617
And all it's got to do
is get me past the cadets.
1666
01:21:00,817 --> 01:21:03,228
General, he is
a dangerous psychopath.
1667
01:21:03,428 --> 01:21:05,578
Now, we're talking
about a sick thief.
1668
01:21:05,778 --> 01:21:08,102
He's a threat to his
own father's life.
1669
01:21:08,302 --> 01:21:09,713
Now, he has to be
kept away from here,
1670
01:21:09,913 --> 01:21:11,802
has to be kept away
from the senator
1671
01:21:12,002 --> 01:21:12,977
at all costs.
You hear that?
1672
01:21:13,177 --> 01:21:14,935
I'll take care of him.
Believe me.
1673
01:21:15,135 --> 01:21:17,329
That boy
humiliated me, Jay.
1674
01:21:17,529 --> 01:21:19,070
I can't stomach that.
1675
01:21:19,270 --> 01:21:20,680
I hate punks.
1676
01:21:20,880 --> 01:21:22,639
I'd like to grab 'em
by the ears
1677
01:21:22,839 --> 01:21:24,423
and puke in their faces.
1678
01:21:24,623 --> 01:21:25,381
That's why
I knew you were
1679
01:21:25,581 --> 01:21:27,295
the right man
for this job, sir.
1680
01:21:27,495 --> 01:21:29,080
Damn right, Jay.
1681
01:21:29,280 --> 01:21:32,257
Cadets, 10-hut.
1682
01:21:33,127 --> 01:21:35,260
Detail ready
for inspection, sir.
1683
01:21:35,460 --> 01:21:37,262
Thank you, captain.
1684
01:21:37,567 --> 01:21:42,354
We're up against
a slimy little turd.
1685
01:21:43,311 --> 01:21:45,357
And we're gonna get him,
aren't we, boys?
1686
01:21:45,557 --> 01:21:47,185
Cadets: Yes, sir!
1687
01:21:47,385 --> 01:21:49,448
Now, what were you before
1688
01:21:49,648 --> 01:21:52,669
you came to milhouse
military academy?
1689
01:21:52,869 --> 01:21:53,844
Cadets: Scum, sir!
1690
01:21:54,044 --> 01:21:55,236
What kind of scum?
1691
01:21:55,436 --> 01:21:56,934
Dope-smoking,
foul-talking,
1692
01:21:57,134 --> 01:21:59,197
rock 'n' roll
pervert scum, sir!
1693
01:21:59,397 --> 01:22:00,633
And what are you now?
1694
01:22:00,833 --> 01:22:03,375
Good little boys, sir!
1695
01:22:04,245 --> 01:22:05,812
You haven't lost
your touch, general.
1696
01:22:06,012 --> 01:22:07,684
Thank you, Jay.
1697
01:22:08,293 --> 01:22:11,339
Captain, you can
deploy the men.
1698
01:22:12,210 --> 01:22:14,125
Captain: To your posts,
gentlemen.
1699
01:22:26,746 --> 01:22:29,096
Uh, mister, excuse me.
1700
01:22:29,296 --> 01:22:30,054
Sure.
1701
01:22:30,254 --> 01:22:32,535
I am buying some
land in Florida.
1702
01:22:32,735 --> 01:22:35,276
The everglades.
You know it maybe?
1703
01:22:35,476 --> 01:22:37,191
Oh, it lookslook up
lovely.There.
1704
01:22:37,391 --> 01:22:40,151
Uh-huh.
Oh.
1705
01:22:44,460 --> 01:22:45,678
Believe me, Steve,
1706
01:22:45,878 --> 01:22:47,854
the senator is very aware
of your generosity.
1707
01:22:48,054 --> 01:22:50,335
And, uh, he just has
to play it a little cool
1708
01:22:50,535 --> 01:22:51,597
at the moment,
you understand?
1709
01:22:51,797 --> 01:22:53,991
Loose lips sink ships.
1710
01:22:54,191 --> 01:22:55,949
But when the time
is right,
1711
01:22:56,149 --> 01:22:59,387
you can be sure he'll be
showing his gratitude.
1712
01:22:59,587 --> 01:23:01,259
To hell with
gratitude, Jay.
1713
01:23:01,459 --> 01:23:02,434
You just make sure
that highway bill
1714
01:23:02,634 --> 01:23:03,827
gets out of committee
in one piece.
1715
01:23:04,027 --> 01:23:09,267
Hey, Steve, don't sweat it,
my friend. No problem.
1716
01:23:11,356 --> 01:23:12,488
That's good little boys.
1717
01:23:12,688 --> 01:23:15,099
Now remember. Keep
a sharp eye out for him.
1718
01:23:15,299 --> 01:23:16,230
Ok, let's move out.
1719
01:23:16,430 --> 01:23:17,536
Cadets: Yes, sir!
1720
01:23:17,736 --> 01:23:22,193
All posts on full alert.
All posts on full alert.
1721
01:23:25,370 --> 01:23:26,284
Oh, Tom.
1722
01:23:26,484 --> 01:23:30,331
How could I have
been so stupid?
1723
01:23:30,984 --> 01:23:32,551
Tom, for god's sake.
1724
01:23:32,751 --> 01:23:35,423
You are a United States
senator.
1725
01:23:35,623 --> 01:23:37,904
We'll fight this with
everything we've got.
1726
01:23:38,104 --> 01:23:40,428
Now, Jay can't possibly
get away with this.
1727
01:23:40,628 --> 01:23:42,648
He may not need to.
1728
01:23:42,848 --> 01:23:43,997
Well, what do you mean?
1729
01:23:44,197 --> 01:23:46,130
If we fight back,
Jay will just stoop
1730
01:23:46,330 --> 01:23:48,349
even lower than
he already has.
1731
01:23:48,549 --> 01:23:49,873
We've allowed him
to get close
1732
01:23:50,073 --> 01:23:51,396
to so many people
in our lives,
1733
01:23:51,596 --> 01:23:52,832
the fallout's gonna
be devastating.
1734
01:23:53,032 --> 01:23:56,314
Well, there goes
the cover of people.
1735
01:23:56,514 --> 01:23:58,098
Who cares?
1736
01:23:58,298 --> 01:23:59,578
We'll fight him, Tom.
1737
01:23:59,778 --> 01:24:01,885
On the beaches,
in the air,
1738
01:24:02,085 --> 01:24:04,191
on the land,
on the sea.
1739
01:24:04,391 --> 01:24:05,715
Together
we can beat him.
1740
01:24:05,915 --> 01:24:09,457
Together we hired
a sleazy, cheap con man
1741
01:24:09,657 --> 01:24:12,243
because we thought
he had street smarts, huh?
1742
01:24:12,443 --> 01:24:13,940
Some street smarts.
1743
01:24:14,140 --> 01:24:15,899
We've been so desperately
afraid of losing,
1744
01:24:16,099 --> 01:24:16,639
we've already lost.
1745
01:24:16,839 --> 01:24:17,640
We've lost our dignity,
1746
01:24:17,840 --> 01:24:19,206
we've lost
our self-respect.
1747
01:24:19,406 --> 01:24:22,558
We've lost our son.
1748
01:24:22,758 --> 01:24:24,951
Let's go downstairs.
1749
01:24:28,172 --> 01:24:34,395
Well, whatever you decide,
senator Stewart,
1750
01:24:34,595 --> 01:24:35,919
just look to your right
1751
01:24:36,119 --> 01:24:39,009
because I'll be
standing there.
1752
01:24:51,151 --> 01:24:53,023
Morgan, there you are.
1753
01:24:53,223 --> 01:24:55,025
I'm so glad
you could make it.
1754
01:24:55,225 --> 01:24:57,288
Oh, a present for me?
1755
01:24:57,488 --> 01:24:58,724
You really shouldn't have.
1756
01:24:58,924 --> 01:25:00,857
Now, I'm awfully sorry that
you're gonna have to miss
1757
01:25:01,057 --> 01:25:02,946
seeing your father
withdraw from the race.
1758
01:25:03,146 --> 01:25:04,948
Actually,
I wrote the speech.
1759
01:25:05,148 --> 01:25:07,951
It's really quite touching.
1760
01:25:08,151 --> 01:25:09,300
Take him away, boys.
1761
01:25:09,500 --> 01:25:13,347
Hey, Morgan,
want a ride?
1762
01:25:13,783 --> 01:25:15,088
Come on. Get on!
1763
01:25:15,288 --> 01:25:16,133
What great timing.
1764
01:25:16,333 --> 01:25:18,875
Ow! Hey!
1765
01:25:21,486 --> 01:25:23,096
A fox is in
the chicken Coop.
1766
01:25:23,296 --> 01:25:26,143
Alpha-Charlie to base.
Alpha-Charlie to base.
1767
01:25:26,343 --> 01:25:27,144
Come in.
1768
01:25:27,344 --> 01:25:30,364
Yes, sir. He won't
get by me, sir.
1769
01:25:31,017 --> 01:25:32,149
All right, let's go.
1770
01:25:32,349 --> 01:25:33,803
Head him off
at the back!
1771
01:25:34,003 --> 01:25:34,847
Let's go.
1772
01:25:35,047 --> 01:25:35,979
Geronimo!
1773
01:25:36,179 --> 01:25:37,676
My fellow virginians,
1774
01:25:37,876 --> 01:25:40,070
it is with a heavy heart
1775
01:25:40,270 --> 01:25:42,420
and a great deal
of regret
1776
01:25:42,620 --> 01:25:46,293
that I stand before you
this afternoon.
1777
01:25:49,079 --> 01:25:50,428
Oh, no.
1778
01:25:50,628 --> 01:25:51,690
Oh, shit.
1779
01:25:51,890 --> 01:25:53,997
Hold on.
Move it. Come on!
1780
01:25:54,197 --> 01:25:55,694
Halt!
1781
01:26:03,354 --> 01:26:05,008
Oh, my god.
1782
01:26:05,208 --> 01:26:06,052
We've got 'em now.
1783
01:26:06,252 --> 01:26:08,838
Wait a minute. Wait.
Stop the Jeep!
1784
01:26:09,316 --> 01:26:11,014
Stop the Jeep!
1785
01:26:11,214 --> 01:26:12,668
Aah!
1786
01:26:13,669 --> 01:26:16,367
Oh, they think they're
getting away, huh?
1787
01:26:16,567 --> 01:26:17,673
Let me out of this.
1788
01:26:17,873 --> 01:26:20,066
They tried this
in Berlin in '45.
1789
01:26:20,266 --> 01:26:21,807
Oh, oh.
1790
01:26:22,007 --> 01:26:24,810
Morgan: Oh, my god.
1791
01:26:26,507 --> 01:26:28,771
Jay: This damn thing
doesn't have seat belts.
1792
01:26:28,971 --> 01:26:29,772
Seat belts?
1793
01:26:29,972 --> 01:26:30,686
Jay:Emily:
Watch it!Look out!
1794
01:26:30,886 --> 01:26:32,470
Watch it,
you goddamned idiot!
1795
01:26:32,670 --> 01:26:34,167
You're speaking to
a superior officer.
1796
01:26:34,367 --> 01:26:36,169
All right,
you're an idiot, sir.
1797
01:26:36,369 --> 01:26:38,215
Now that's better.
1798
01:26:39,346 --> 01:26:43,046
Jay: Where in the hell
are they going?!
1799
01:26:51,707 --> 01:26:53,578
Coming through.
1800
01:26:53,778 --> 01:26:55,232
My god,
it's Morgan.
1801
01:26:55,432 --> 01:26:56,799
Dad, catch!
1802
01:26:56,999 --> 01:26:58,061
Read the receipt book.
1803
01:26:58,261 --> 01:27:00,716
We got Jay by
the short hairs.
1804
01:27:01,629 --> 01:27:03,849
Morgan, hold on.
1805
01:27:06,852 --> 01:27:07,984
Excuse me.
1806
01:27:08,184 --> 01:27:09,376
Oh...
1807
01:27:11,422 --> 01:27:12,423
Shit!
1808
01:27:12,623 --> 01:27:14,991
Get out of the way!
Out of the way!
1809
01:27:15,191 --> 01:27:16,819
Come on, general!
After him!
1810
01:27:17,019 --> 01:27:17,950
Oh, shit!
1811
01:27:18,150 --> 01:27:19,430
Go! Go!
1812
01:27:23,086 --> 01:27:25,436
Emily: We're cut off.
Left turn.
1813
01:27:25,636 --> 01:27:27,786
Jay: Wait, wait!
What are you doing?
1814
01:27:27,986 --> 01:27:29,788
Wait, you crazy bastard!
1815
01:27:29,988 --> 01:27:32,008
General: Ha ha ha.
This is living.
1816
01:27:32,208 --> 01:27:33,313
Jesus Christ, fenton!
1817
01:27:33,513 --> 01:27:34,619
General,
you're an asshole!
1818
01:27:34,819 --> 01:27:35,968
Now what the hell
is go-
1819
01:27:36,168 --> 01:27:37,361
put the brakes on!
1820
01:27:37,561 --> 01:27:39,798
Aah!
1821
01:27:41,191 --> 01:27:42,975
Aah!
1822
01:27:46,718 --> 01:27:49,373
Oh, my god, Tom.
Oh, god.
1823
01:27:50,809 --> 01:27:54,160
General, you're a-
you're a complete idiot!
1824
01:27:54,360 --> 01:27:56,554
You're a goddamn asshole!
1825
01:27:58,077 --> 01:27:59,426
Jay: I hate you.
1826
01:27:59,626 --> 01:28:00,863
Jay, Jay, you don't
mean that.
1827
01:28:01,063 --> 01:28:03,300
No, you can't mean that
after all we've been through.
1828
01:28:03,500 --> 01:28:05,650
Oh, thank god.
You got it.
1829
01:28:05,850 --> 01:28:06,651
Have you got
everything?
1830
01:28:06,851 --> 01:28:10,350
Jay: Die, you
son of a bitch, die.
1831
01:28:10,550 --> 01:28:12,178
Morgan voice-over:
With my new hero status,
1832
01:28:12,378 --> 01:28:13,614
I was able to really
crack the whip,
1833
01:28:13,814 --> 01:28:16,661
and we finally took
a family vacation.
1834
01:28:16,861 --> 01:28:18,837
Dad will always
be in outer space,
1835
01:28:19,037 --> 01:28:20,186
but at least I've got him
in an earth orbit,
1836
01:28:20,386 --> 01:28:23,059
and we're getting
to be pals.
1837
01:28:23,259 --> 01:28:24,147
Mom's a tough one.
1838
01:28:24,347 --> 01:28:25,235
She's getting
a little better
1839
01:28:25,435 --> 01:28:27,150
with the hugging
and kissing.
1840
01:28:27,350 --> 01:28:28,586
Oh, I did get her
to eat a hamburger.
1841
01:28:28,786 --> 01:28:31,110
That was a real
breakthrough.
1842
01:28:31,310 --> 01:28:34,070
Oh, and Jay took
a nice long vacation
1843
01:28:34,270 --> 01:28:35,854
at a very exclusive resort.
1844
01:28:36,054 --> 01:28:37,464
He deserved it.
1845
01:28:37,664 --> 01:28:38,988
Ivan's in
the real estate business
1846
01:28:39,188 --> 01:28:40,076
and he's doing swell.
1847
01:28:40,276 --> 01:28:41,077
That's his new wife Monica.
1848
01:28:41,277 --> 01:28:42,774
They're enjoying
the American dream
1849
01:28:42,974 --> 01:28:44,602
in their new home.
1850
01:28:44,802 --> 01:28:45,951
I got a postcard
from Anna.
1851
01:28:46,151 --> 01:28:48,867
She's happy back in Russia
and making new friends.
1852
01:28:49,067 --> 01:28:50,303
Oh, Emily and I
are super tight.
1853
01:28:50,503 --> 01:28:52,175
I took her
to the junior prom.
1854
01:28:52,375 --> 01:28:54,742
We were the best looking
couple there.
1855
01:28:54,942 --> 01:28:56,092
Like em said,
raising parents
1856
01:28:56,292 --> 01:28:57,876
does take a lot of work,
1857
01:28:58,076 --> 01:28:59,443
but it can be done.
1858
01:28:59,643 --> 01:29:01,749
Having a real family
is one of the big thrills
1859
01:29:01,949 --> 01:29:02,838
on this planet.
1860
01:29:03,038 --> 01:29:04,622
Oh, by the way,
dad won the election.
1861
01:29:04,822 --> 01:29:07,451
Mom got the cover
of people,
1862
01:29:07,651 --> 01:29:10,280
and I got a family.
1863
01:29:13,370 --> 01:29:15,894
Captioning made possible by
trimark home video
1864
01:29:16,094 --> 01:29:20,377
captioning performed by the
national captioning institute, inc.
1865
01:29:20,638 --> 01:29:22,379
♪ Whoo-hoo
1866
01:29:22,579 --> 01:29:26,470
♪ walking home
in the rain ♪
1867
01:29:26,670 --> 01:29:30,126
♪ blood runs cold
in my veins ♪
1868
01:29:30,326 --> 01:29:34,217
♪ news from
a distant shore ♪
1869
01:29:34,417 --> 01:29:39,004
♪ blues like never before
1870
01:29:39,204 --> 01:29:42,703
♪ the moon is new
1871
01:29:42,903 --> 01:29:46,707
♪ the moon is full
1872
01:29:50,407 --> 01:29:56,407
♪ the moon is blue
1873
01:29:58,023 --> 01:30:02,071
♪ the moon is full
1874
01:30:02,271 --> 01:30:05,596
♪ painted moon
1875
01:30:05,796 --> 01:30:09,382
♪ coming to the rescue
1876
01:30:09,582 --> 01:30:13,386
♪ angels from another world
1877
01:30:13,586 --> 01:30:17,216
♪ love is here to stay
1878
01:30:17,416 --> 01:30:20,959
♪ so the angels say
1879
01:30:21,159 --> 01:30:24,702
♪ running to the rescue
1880
01:30:24,902 --> 01:30:28,532
♪ angels flying up above
1881
01:30:28,732 --> 01:30:32,362
♪ phantoms in the bay
1882
01:30:32,562 --> 01:30:35,887
♪ while the natives pray
1883
01:30:36,087 --> 01:30:38,977
♪ to the painted moon
1884
01:30:39,177 --> 01:30:42,850
♪ I wash my face
and get dressed ♪
1885
01:30:43,050 --> 01:30:46,593
♪ the time
cuts into my rest ♪
1886
01:30:46,793 --> 01:30:50,684
♪ so who invents
our dreams? ♪
1887
01:30:50,884 --> 01:30:55,428
♪ The hands
that hold the machine ♪
1888
01:30:55,628 --> 01:30:59,215
♪ the moon is blue
1889
01:30:59,415 --> 01:31:03,262
♪ the moon is cool
1890
01:31:03,462 --> 01:31:06,962
♪ painted moon
1891
01:31:07,162 --> 01:31:10,704
♪ coming to the rescue
1892
01:31:10,904 --> 01:31:14,491
♪ angels from another world
1893
01:31:14,691 --> 01:31:18,451
♪ love is here to stay
1894
01:31:18,651 --> 01:31:22,238
♪ so the angels say
1895
01:31:22,438 --> 01:31:26,024
♪ running to the rescue
1896
01:31:26,224 --> 01:31:30,028
♪ angels flying up above
1897
01:31:30,228 --> 01:31:33,553
♪ phantoms in the bay
1898
01:31:33,753 --> 01:31:37,122
♪ while the natives pray
1899
01:31:37,322 --> 01:31:42,736
♪ to the painted moon
1900
01:31:45,391 --> 01:31:48,394
♪ painted moon
119820
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