All language subtitles for Even.If.I.Want.to.Work.What.Do.I.Do.1972.ITALIAN.1080p.WEBRip.x264-VXT

Oh, God, they are priests!
And now?

Madam, get in.

I live in Borghetto.
I don't know if it's along the way.

We have to go past there.
Come.

Don't worry. Give me your hand.

I don't want to bother.

Stop! Keep your hands to yourself!

What are you doing?

Filthy scums!

You bastards!

- My purse!
- Give her purse back.

My purse is there!

- Here it is!
- Stop!

- The fender!
- Run!

What is your order?
The "darn you! "order?

- I got it.
- Give it to me.

She's angry!

I told you she wouldn't do it.

Can I hang on?

- Sure, go ahead.
- Thank you.

Don't do that, Sunflower.
They are just ordinary men.

They're policemen, and they hit.
You were never caught.

- My mother is Franciscan.
- Nice place! I went there.

- We don't care.
- I'd like to be a policeman.

- Be quiet.
- That is the last thing we needed.

Goodbye, Father. Thank you.

- Help!
- What is going on?

Help! Let me go!

- There's someone who hits here.
- Then don't stop.

Stop! Help! He's killing me!

Stop! Help! Stop!

- Father!
- What is going on?

My uncle is having an attack.

He's possessed by the devil!
Help me! Get off.

Darn you!

You're breaking everything!

May lightning strike you!

- There he is.
- Peace and good will. May we?

You can't go. We're two
poor women. You're leaving us?

- He'll kill us.
- What can we do?

I'll show you.

Father Curly!

- Are you hurt?
- The devil pisses him off.

Brother Giocondo, take the ladies
over there and bless the house.

- We'll take care of him.
- Go inside.

- How long has he been like this?
- Since he began digging.

Maybe it's because of this thing.

Yes. It's ghostly stuff
that comes from tombs.

- Do you have other pieces?
- He found a painted piece too.

Hold still. Lallo, hold him.

What a blow!

Pray, brothers.

- Is he dead?
- No. The devils have left.

- Oh, God!
- He's sleeping.

- Don't wake him up.
- He's well now. Happy, Auntie?

I want to make an offering.

- Who will I give it to?
- Get some cheese.

Brothers, let's go. It's late.

Holy Vereconda!

Thank you for having chased
the devil from my uncle's body.

We can ask the cleaner's shop
for 200,000 Liras.

- There's a lot of stuff.
- Depends on Asvero.

- You feel good this time?
- Yeah, Asvero...

I am sick and tired.

You speak well.
In the end, it's always my turn.

You were born cute.

It was my turn twice.
Once for Lallo.

- She's beautiful.
- She scares you because she's mute.

- Sunflower!
- What did I say?

Good morning, Mrs. Tilde.
We're the Colle Civitella people.

We have some stuff.
You want to look at it?

Look. There are 23 pieces. We're
giving everything at 300,000 Liras,

even the saint if you want.

Look at this.

It's a 6th century vase.

- What did she say?
- What she said the last time.

Mrs. Tilde, we're in line.

- Let's go.
- Go.

- Go!
- Sorry. I'm not...

- Go!
- I'm not very practical with this.

My arm!

Yes.

Don't push.

You're closing the curtain?
Even in the dark? She's crazy.

Yes.

Anything you say!

What're you saying?

I'm not very fond of this.

You even locked me up.

Open the door and let me out.

If you want, I'll go call Asvero.

I'll do it!

Easy, Asvero, or it will break.

- Easy!
- Here's the vase.

Sunflower liked it so much!

I can't! I'm not wearing underpants.

I am embarrassed.

Excuse me, but who should I hit?

Should I hit?

Should I hit? I'll gladly do it.

I'll hit, huh?

What're you doing?
You're hitting? Let go!

Do you think I'm a softie?
I'll kick you!

Come on, let it go!

You're hurting me!

Where are you?

Darn it!

What're you doing?
Let me go!

Let me go!

I'll show you now.

You're begging for help?

Even at 10,000 a piece,
it would be about 250,000.

- How much is it?
- 100,000.

We spent 120. Let's make it
at least 150,000. You tell her.

She won't listen. She said 100,000.
Take it or leave it.

- You want to leave?
- Ok. Asvero, look for Sunflower.

Sunflower!

Lallo, come!

Give me a hand.

She beat the hell out of me.

Damn her!

Who are you?

Hurry.

- Halt!
- You go. Get him!

No, dear colleague.

According to the norm of decree
1852, it's my jurisdiction.

We are in the
Colle Civitella district here.

Let's forget about
"dear colleague".

If you mean that man, you're
not considering the change

made by the RD 1929,
a basic law.

Who is it?

- Those scums!
- It's you!

- They don't give up!
- Garrone, what're you doing here?

They've been following me
from Ponte Nuovo.

Who is he, Sunflower?

He's the new tenant.
My grandma rented a niche.

- Are you going out?
- No, I'm going to sleep.

- Good morning, madam.
- Good morning, my ass!

Grandma, don't wear my gloves
as socks!

I was awake the whole night.

I can't hear anything in one ear.

- What've you got here?
- What do you care?

- What do I care?
- Right.

You have to go.
You've nothing to do here!

Be quiet. They're up here.
Do you hear them walking?

So it's the Finance Guards' duty
to arrest him.

I saw him first,
and I've been here since last night.

I've been waiting a week
for him here!

Marshal Dorigo!

- Did you get him?
- He disappeared.

He jumped from the gully.

Go to the car.

Please, dear colleague.

Maybe you are right.

In fact, the paragraph
of the single text says...

Just a moment.
Let's examine this.

Since it's an offense
done under your jurisdiction,

in your territory,

if we want to be precise,

the Finance Guard
has nothing to do with it.

- But you saw him first.
- No difference. We're not on a hunt.

- You just said it.
- Forget it. Let's go.

- The basic law...
- Let's go!

Does he think he's handsome?

Marshal, he was our criminal.

If you'd caught him,
but you had him get away.

So it was the Finance Guards' duty,
alright? Let's go.

Life is impossible here
since that jinx came.

- Who? Novembersecond?
- Damn it!

- Grandma, the light.
- Your gloves.

Good morning, Cesira.
How's your little girl?

Run! Run!

Mom's love! Close the door!

Don't insist, please.

It's an exceptional bronze.

Come to me with your car.
It'll be quicker.

- I don't like going around today.
- Why?

Two policemen are at the highway toll
spot, and the Finance Guards too.

Don't worry.

Then why did we come from Rome?

Here he is again! I guarantee
that it's 6th century stuff.

They've already put it in a tire.

- Where?
- An automobile wheel.

Come to me. I'll be waiting.

- Mr. Nereo.
- Hello, Garrone.

Good morning, Mrs. Celeste.

- How's the day going?
- Fine, until now.

I'll bet you are a foreigner.

May I? Nereo Tirelli,
a local Etruscan expert.

- May I offer you something?
- No, thank you.

- I already ordered a cappuccino.
- Good. I'll pay. Two cappuccinos.

Are you buying?

I'm the only professional
grave robber here.

The others are amateurs,

common thieves.

If you come to my home,

I will show you...

Let's go, sir.

- Where do you want to go?
- I'll get off farther down.

He is crazy.

If he always drives like that,
sooner or later...

It's a miracle if I'm alive.
I almost had a mortal accident

just because I saw him outside
the cafe. You know who I mean?

Certainly, Novembersecond.

He was the most controlled
grave robber of the area.

Certainly.

Now that he's back, the Finance
Guards and Carabinieri are here.

Until yesterday, we did what we
wanted. He ruined us.

There was a helicopter yesterday.
Curly saw it.

Agony, what should we do?

Garrone says he won't take
our stuff anymore.

- He has to.
- You've come from Rome 5 years

saying, "Dig. I'll place the stuff."

They're all digging like mice here.

We risk, and you're backing out?

I'm not backing out,
but I won't get the stuff here.

It is too dangerous now.

Bring it to Rome.
I always have good clients for you.

You say this because
there isn't a grave robber union.

It's a miracle if I'm alive!

I won't ever come back here.

And watch out,
searches are under way.

- Good night to everyone!
- Get out!

Agony, Garrone left.

Did you hear that?

I heard, but what do you want
from me?

- So what?
- So... I don't give a darn.

You've been sleeping for free here
for three years now.

You could pay your debt.

What should I do? I'm stuck
in bed with this ugly illness.

I piss in my pants
20 times a day.

Agostino has an idea.

We could hide the pieces
in your mattress.

Or under the platform.

It's small stuff.

- Nobody would get close to you.
- We'll pay you.

Only for a couple of days,
until the search stops.

What do you say?

There's more excavated stuff
under this bed

than in the Tarquinia museum.
Should I tell everyone?

There are two bronze statues
to pay the doctor.

That's good! Two are yours,
two are ours!

But when you sell yours,
you'll sell mine too.

Alright.

- Don't get caught.
- Don't worry.

Shut off the light, lock the door

and let me die in peace.

- What did you say?
- Nothing. Go get the pieces.

Thanks, Agony.

I heard that you are a good dancer.

I'm sorry to have
disappointed you again.

You're much more than a good dancer.
You're a delightful dancer.

Really delightful.

Reverend.

Reverend!

My uncle said

that if he catches the guy
who punched him, he'll shoot him.

Will you let me by, please?

- What manners!
- Get your hands off me!

Reverend, stop.
Where are you going?

Stop!

It's useless that you run away.
I recognized you.

You're pretending you don't know me?

Then I'll go to the police.

You'll stop wanting to go
to homes dressed as a friar,

swindling poor working people.

Let me explain how things stand.

I didn't look for you,
you looked for me.

You want to ruin me
for two cakes of cheese?

Six cheeses and 10,000 Liras.

- You are identical.
- To who?

To my passion, Lucio Battisti.

Is your hair real?
May I touch it?

Go ahead.

It is so fine.
Little curls, little curls!

When a man has a police record

or is reported to the police,

it's over for him.

He doesn't find a job anymore.

You're looking for a job?

Me? No!

- Don't you have a family?
- Asvero and I don't.

Lallo used to live with his sister.

A fat woman
with a very thin husband.

Then they kicked him out.
Sunflower has a grandmother.

You are no one's children.
And the blond one?

Asvero? He's the son of a German SS
who was hiding here.

- The other two and I are orphans.
- All of you?

Yes, both our parents. It's destiny!

Ever heard of
the Bonaventura shipwreck?

- No. What is it?
- It was a ship.

On it were many emigrants
from these parts.

Our parents
had boarded that boat too.

Luckily, we were little
and they left us at home,

or we'd have died too.

Get arrested. Uncle says that after
the slug, his eyesight weakened.

If he finds you, he'll shoot you.
What'll we do with this report?

I don't know.
I've opened up to you for an hour.

- Then you didn't understand.
- Ok, I'll see you tomorrow.

I can't tomorrow.
I am busy with my friends.

- Besides, you live far away.
- I have to go.

- Don't tell your uncle I saw you.
- I must think about it.

But Sunday I'll be back.

- What is your name?
- Curly.

What a name! My name is Pasquina.

My pleasure.

Yours isn't that great, either.

- Watch out!
- You throw it, then say "watch out"!

- Curly must cultivate her.
- It's easier said than done.

This piece is really lovely.

That pig is chasing her,
all horny!

- If he catches her...
- How will we take this stuff out?

- We must call Garrone.
- There are Agony's pieces too.

Yes, you promised him.

Lallo, how old do you think
Pasquina is?

Very old!

- She's in love with Lucio Battisti.
- And she makes a pass at you?

She says I look like him.

He is cute, you're disgusting.
You look like a monkey.

- So does she!
- You're ungrateful.

I sacrifice myself for you!
If it wasn't for me she'd report you.

She'd report us!

You're on the same team.

You gave her uncle a nice blow.

The police is outside Porta Romana
even at night.

The Finance Guards are at the bridge.

The Army, the Air Force...
Only the Navy is missing.

I have an idea
to take everything outside.

- Speak up.
- It's a real man's idea.

- Then it's nonsense.
- Remember what Agony said?

- Lallo, you say it.
- You, chicken, what'd Agony say?

- Don't make fun of me!
- Calm down!

He said,
"Let me die in peace."

- And so?
- Let's give him a hand.

- What's that mean?
- What does he want to do?

It seems he wants to kill him.

- You can go.
- Thank you.

Halt!

Excuse me. Let them by.

Just a moment.

Nothing. Go ahead, Father.

Proceed!

Go on, accelerate!

I'll take care of it, don't worry.

Why are you speeding? Darn you!

I hope your friend at the cafe
isn't involved in this deal.

- Novembersecond?
- Yes, that's him.

This just may be my idea,

but he doesn't bring good luck.
- Really?

It's the first time that
my brakes don't work.

Forget it. This time you made
a great deal.

- Curly is coming!
- Come with me.

Asvero, hurry.
The buyer is here too.

Let's go.

Follow me. I'll guide you.
Come here.

Now put it in reverse.

Come, Curly.

That's it.

Keep going.

- Good thing I was to keep going!
- Open, Sunflower.

Did you see? They made it.

There are 22 pieces.
You're an antique dealer, an expert.

This is a fortune!
Look at this Etruscan head.

- What about the procession?
- They're still running.

Hey! Let me out!

Please.

- Sir...
- Darn! Don't touch me!

- You forgot your money.
- Ask your friend.

- I dealt with him.
- See you on Sunday.

We'd agreed you'd give us
the money right away.

Asvero, Lallo,
let's stop the van!

Let's stop it!

- Stop it!
- Let's get the coffin!

Pull!

Easy!

We'll break everything!

Watch out!

They're all broken!

Imbeciles!

- Who did you say that to?
- To you.

- Me? I'll break you!
- You broke everything here!

Hurry. Pick them up, guys.
Look at that! Idiots!

- The head is intact.
- So is the big tear ampoule.

- Shall I collect these, too?
- Sure.

- Garrone!
- Pick them up, Lallo.

- What is it?
- Everything broke, huh?

I shouldn't have listened to you.
I want to leave.

Sir, please.

It's a matter of honor.
You must not mortify me.

The head and amphora are intact.
It's almost all intact.

You'll check the findings in Rome
and give me what I want.

As long as we leave.
Have them moved!

I'll come back Sunday
and we'll fix everything up.

Honk!

- Honk the horn!
- They won't move.

Honk the horn!

Trust me.

I'm humiliated by this! Ready, sir!

- Will he bring the money Sunday?
- I don't think so.

He better not dare!

I've been closed in here for 3 hours.

Let me out!

You're making my head spin!

Darn you!
I don't want to stay here.

I wanted to die as a real gentleman.

But the funeral wasn't worth
jack shit.

I wanted an engraved coffin

but had a poor man's one.
- Come on, Agony!

And the bishop? Where was he?

Not even the priest wanted
to come to your home!

To have the coffin enter
the church, he wanted 5,000 Liras.

- And we paid.
- And the flowers?

The wreath was so little,
it looked like a toilet seat.

- Agony, this is your season.
- Take these cigarettes.

- Leave me alone.
- Let's dance.

Darn you.
You're not following the rhythm.

Guys, let's go home
or we'll be late.

Have a drop, young man.

May lightning strike you!

Sunflower, you're leaving me alone?

Leave me that animal, at least.

- Here. Don't lose it.
- He's better than people.

- Wait for me!
- We'll return Saturday with food!

- What more do you want?
- You don't want women, do you?

Send them over.
No woman has ever complained.

Curly, wait for me!

Good morning, Nadia.

- Did you hurt yourself?
- Naturally.

I came to get your daughter.

- What will you do with her?
- I want to get her pregnant.

Annunziata isn't here.
You can try the second one.

The second one?
I'll take a look at her.

Too bad!
Annunziata and I got along.

Antonietta, come!

Here I am.

- What do you want?
- My gosh!

She is too thin.
What'll I do with her?

She has narrow hips.

- No offense, but she won't do.
- And so...

Sir, look at me.
I have wide hips.

Annunziata's clothes
are too tight for me.

How old is she? She's little.

- 15. When will you bring her back?
- We'll go to Zagarolo tonight.

- Does she know what to do?
- Annunziata is more expert...

Alright.

Lilletta, come, pretty girl.

Come.

Go with him now.

Keep this tight. Don't let it go.

Four, five, six and seven.

No more left.

Now get inside.

There.

Put on the wedding band. Here.

- Hold your stomach, idiot.
- I knew the clothes were too few.

Of course!
There are more pieces than clothes.

Good morning. Where are you headed?

- Zagarolo.
- Good.

Aren't you Tirelli Nereo,
son of Alcide,

from Lugano,
and resident of Colle Civitella?

Yes.

- Why is a pregnant girl in there?
- Her? She is my wife.

She seems too young, huh?
She fell in love and wanted me.

- This is the lieutenant.
- I am not a lieutenant.

De Crescenzo!
Help the lady get down.

- Yes, sir.
- She can't travel like this.

- I'll accompany her to San Germano.
- I see.

Weren't you previously married?

Yes, but since I'm waiting for...
that thing... a divorce.

- I already did that other thing.
- I can tell you did!

The separation.

- Dear.
- Come.

Don't be afraid. Come.

Don't worry, dear.
The lieutenant will accompany you.

- I'm not a lieutenant.
- You have a lieutenant's build.

- But not the rank yet.
- She's not disturbing, huh?

- It's our duty.
- Should I go?

Go. The lieutenant
will accompany you to Zagarolo.

- Follow me with the car.
- Sure. You'll be more comfortable.

Even if I wanted to work,
what could I do?

My cousin is mason head
for the Subiaco dam works.

I can talk to him if you want.

He can get you a job,
maybe unloading bricks.

- Bricks?
- That's how my cousin began.

As long as it's a steady job.

These are tough times
and it could be a solution.

- If your cousin hired all of us...
- All of us, who?

Me, Lallo, Asvero and Sunflower.

Stop!
Then I should be a slave!

Not bricks, but you can't go on
being a reverend or undertaker.

You're of a certain age now.
You must think about a family.

Darn these curls!

So fine! Little curls, little curls!

You look a lot like him.

- Have you ever tried singing?
- I sing off tune.

What are you doing? Stop it.

Come on!

- Did I hurt you?
- Not you, the bike.

Calm down.
Let's postpone till Sunday!

Isn't it the same thing?

You don't feel anything?

I'm sacrificing myself. This morning
I had to put up with her.

She certainly isn't beautiful,
and she's not a young girl,

but she dresses elegantly
and has a certain class.

Asvero, Curly is right.

You may be tall, handsome,
blond and thin,

but you're a jackass!
Here. Pick a card.

- Thank you.
- Get out!

Sunflower, where did you go?

- Hey!
- Leave me alone.

- Why didn't you come with us today?
- I've a family, my grandma.

I provide for her.
You people always joke around.

Us? Now you're acting up
because you have a grandma.

Do you have 100 Liras?

I'll return it.

It makes me furious that Garrone
owes us over 200,000 Liras

and we owe each other money.

As if it bothered you!

He never swindles others, only us.

- He says he's a friend.
- He was a friend.

It's the consumed tentacle
civilization of the big city

that ruined him.

He's the custodian at the wax museum,
not the director.

Getting swindled by a custodian...

Nobody swindles Curly.

You think I don't know
the road to Rome?

- Sure. It's not abroad.
- So should we go?

- It's necessary.
- Then go there.

- You're sending me alone?
- No.

In fact, we're leaving tonight.

- Well said, Curly.
- What did I say?

It's necessary.

- What happened?
- Nothing.

Now it's your turn to drive.

- What time is it?
- Time for you to wake up.

- What happened?
- I want to sleep too.

- The battery.
- Damn it!

Is Pasquina that ugly?

- She looks like an alley cat.
- Come on, push!

Don't laugh like imbeciles!

Asvero is better off than anyone.

Do you believe his father was
a German captain, a baron?

He's the son of a filthy SS.

And his mother? We don't know.

She could look for him one day
and find him.

Maybe he's the son of a marquise!

He's not the son of a marquise.

- He's the son of a bitch!
- Stop, Asvero!

He didn't stop.

He stopped!

Good thing you came,
or I would have come.

I must tell you about an
important deal. Where're the others?

- Call Asvero and Sunflower.
- Hurry.

July 23, 1943,
the Grand Council's last session.

- Hi, Sunflower.
- Good morning.

- What is the deal?
- What's it about?

A big grave in which
a German professor is involved.

We know your plans.

I'm never wrong about these things.
This time I bet everything.

- Even our money?
- Yes, in your interest.

You could've asked us.

- You always do as you please.
- Oh, come on!

With those broken pieces
I didn't even get half.

- Give us half.
- At least 100,000.

- Give it to us.
- Then you didn't understand.

You don't know what
we can find in there.

Who will buy the part
we're entitled to?

The dealer, I guarantee.

If you're not interested,
consider it a loan.

Maybe a personal loan.

- You don't trust me?
- Me? Oh, sure!

I even told them.
"Why bother going to Rome?"

- "Let's forget it."
- Garrone, you screwed us again.

You can't go now. You travelled
all night. I'll take care of it.

Thanks, but we don't want to bother.
We'll sleep in the van.

No bother. You can sleep here
until noon.

I'll wake you when
the cleaning women come.

- One can sleep in Rommel's tent.
- Who is he?

- General Rommel.
- Are there two beds?

No. He never sleeps. He watches the
dunes looking for an enemy ambush.

Here it is. A real camp bed.

This tent is lovely.

- Where do I sleep?
- It's hard!

- I'll fix you all up.
- I'll sleep here.

- Lallo, come.
- Wake me up!

Don't leave me here.

- Curly, come here.
- Garrone!

Have a good rest.
Take off your shoes.

- You'll have him sleep in the john?
- How ignorant!

- That is Marie Antoinette's boudoir.
- It stinks in here!

- You'll sleep at the casino.
- With sluts?

The casino where you gamble.

Now we'll move "moustache".

There. Try it.

- It seems a bit tight.
- You are real nuisances!

Oh, God!
Did I die and go to hell?

You think I should be in hell?

Jesus, Mary and Joseph,
save my heart and soul.

When you used to see me,
you didn't call the saints.

You won't leave me alone
even after your death?

Isn't it enough
that you ruined my youth?

Disappear, you cursed soul!
I'll have a mass said for you.

Have it said for your grandson.

When I catch him and his friends...

That delinquent, Sunflower!

This vegetable soup
is the first taste of food

after a week of fasting.

What do you want from me?
Don't you see I am old?

Only a cat took pity on me

and let me eat it
without complaining.

Last night the tide took
my trousers and underpants.

I'll show you I don't have them.
Are you alone at home?

Go back to hell,
you tempting ghost! Go!

- You check on me now?
- No, I am yours now.

I couldn't resist you.
Just think if my uncle knew!

Come on, get inside.

I talked to my cousin.

The job is yours.
You can go on Monday.

Are you happy?

You can work extra time too.

Yeah!

- Let's go to your house.
- No. I sleep here in the garage.

Come on. I'll take you to the bus.

- What are you doing?
- Turn in here.

Where are you going?
Hurry, the bus will leave.

She always thinks of the same thing.

They are so lovely...

Little curls, little curls!

What do you want to do?
Filthy pig!

Help! The brake
is between my thighs.

- I'll move it.
- I will move it!

- Stop!
- Stop it! Oh, God!

They're organized people from
the north. With machine guns...

They have money.

Everyone steals today.

If I were rich, I wouldn't steal.

It means you've already stolen
or that your father stole.

Why? Can't someone become rich
just by working?

No. If you work, you don't
have time to make money.

You either work or make money.
They're different things.

Then why don't we have money
if we don't work?

We never thought of
doing a 300 million hit.

Where can you find 300 million
in these parts?

You say I'm a jackass, but I think
there's 300 million over there.

The Etruscan museum.
What an idea!

- Are you crazy?
- More than 300 million!

- It's my turn.
- Over there...

Get down.

- Stuff worth billions!
- What are you saying?

The Etruscan castle museum
is a fortress.

For such a hit,
we'd need the hole gang.

What hole?
We're already four.

I agree. Four of us...

Two. Lallo and I don't count.

Why not? Am I a jerk?

Say it! Am I a jerk?

- I'm not getting into this.
- I'd say you are.

- I was saying it for you.
- I decide for myself.

I'm in.

- No, I'm not.
- We'd have a sure future.

We could stop being
grave robbers.

- We could travel.
- We could do anything.

You and your grandma
could come out of the tomb.

I said no.

You want a candy?

- You're not ambitious.
- That's how I am.

- If you unwrap it, it's better.
- Curly, you tell him.

It would be a dream,
like going to "Calcubo".

- Acapulco!
- Same thing.

London! Spain!

I'd go to Hawaii.

So you're in too.

No. The hit is too difficult.

See that?
It's the alarm system.

They have an alarm system.

I noticed. It's nonsense.

Look at the windows' locks.

Asvero, look at that door.
Check if it looks out on the alley.

There's the john where I will hide.

In fact, I'll go now.
I have to pee.

You keep on insisting?

Now we know there are
only two custodians.

- By the cash register and by...
- The john.

No, by the deer of Veio.

Let's recap.

The entrance is here. What is this?

- A cockroach.
- No. I mean, what is here?

The terrace.

Exactly. If someone stays
inside the museum after closing time,

goes on the terrace and drops a rope,
where does he end up?

- In jail.
- Sunflower, be quiet.

- So where does he end up?
- I'll explain.

Down there, on the beach,
while the other remains inside.

He remains inside.

- There's no use talking to you.
- Yeah, right.

- Wait, Curly.
- Let's just forget it.

- No, go on. I am interested.
- You can't talk to certain people.

- Talk to us.
- I can't waste time.

I know them. If they catch you,
they'll bust your ass!

Pour.

- To Lallo's new home.
- Modestly speaking...

- To the big museum hit!
- What'll you do with all that money?

Go to Berlin. Maybe I'll find my dad.
I've the address of a castle.

I'll go to America,
so the affair with Pasquina will end,

including her cousin's bricks.

You'll leave me by myself?

I must tell you something.
I don't think it's correct.

First you seduce her
and then you leave her?

- Yes, you went to bed with her.
- Me?

- Don't make me talk.
- Come on, tell us.

Did she rape you?
What did she do?

I can't talk. You don't understand.

- This is a personal matter.
- Come on, among friends...

I can't. You know me.

I am a gentleman.

Lallo, be quiet.
He's told us 2,000 times.

Let's talk about
tomorrow's rehearsal.

Here's the blueprint.

- Remember the established time?
- I don't.

- 5:15 p.m.
- I'll continue.

I will hide in the museum john

to make sure we can leave
after closing time.

Meanwhile, Lallo will watch over
the museum entrance

to establish the exact time
one of the custodians gets off work.

He is leaving. Run, Lallo! Move!

Asvero, only one custodian
is left now.

Just go.

Act normal.

Hurry. Don't look.

Don't close the door!

Hurry. Drop down the rope.

Hurry.

Meanwhile, Sunflower
stays on the beach. So...

Go on, Sunflower, a wild cat's leap.

With great speed and promptness.

The fourth man will climb
the wall,

agile as a squirrel
in the forest.

A squirrel? Jerk!

I knew it.

Meanwhile, another enters
the service door that I've opened.

- While another...
- You keep saying "another".

There are only four of us.

Another guy who should cut the wires
and open the showcases.

And one who pulls up
the baskets from the beach.

Darn! We're not enough!

We need other men.

- I told you.
- One, two, three, four...

- At least another four men.
See? It can't be done.

It doesn't matter. Let's drink to it.
Maybe next time.

I had a great idea.

But we've organized everything.
We even bought gloves.

- We must find accomplices.
- What do you say, Sunflower?

- I'm not getting into it.
- I know who can help us.

I'll get dressed and in 10 minutes
we'll meet at the cafe.

Well?

What do you need?

What is it, Curly?

- You talk, Asvero.
- No, you talk.

- I won't talk.
- I didn't ask you.

You were looking at me.

It's all been planned, Mr. Nereo.

- Folder.
- Folder.

We took the liberty of bringing you
a gift. It's small.

- We prepared everything.
- I think it's a tough hit.

- Be quiet.
- At the museum.

- The Etruscan museum.
- Don't worry. There is no risk.

We calculated everything.
I'll explain. This is the entrance.

There are two custodians, but...

Do you need other men?

We're almost four.

We need another four.

Why did you turn to me?

They say that you,
despite everything...

Stop! Despite?

No, Sunflower made a mistake.

He meant, "after all".

After all, you are the only person
on the level of this...

At this very important level.

Curly is right. When we must sell
all this stuff abroad...

You are known abroad.
Lugano, Geneva...

You are the only one in this town.

It's either you, or we can forget it.

- We didn't have a choice.
- Be quiet.

Alright. We'll share in equal parts.

- Four parts to you, four to me.
- Half?

If you think it's too much,
take your folder back.

- And the hen?
- Alright, half.

I understood.
I'll take care of the four men.

We need Lock Pick
who was recently released.

Pigface has a rigged van.

Lightning is good
for filling baskets.

And Speed, to the rope.
He worked in a circus.

I'll keep the folder.

Excuse me. Marshal, do you
recognize me? I'm Nereo Tirelli.

- Come. How is the bride?
- Who?

- Your wife.
- Oh, yes. She is...

- It's almost time, huh?
- It sure is!

Finally you came to see us.

Dolfin, take the Tirelli file.

It's among the controlled
grave robbers.

What happened to you?

- A conscience crisis?
- Here.

Let's take a look.

"From the transcription
of the last six years..."

"Article 407 of the Penal Code
for trespassing of sepulcher."

"Year: one, with conditional."

"Article 411,
unburial of corpse..."

Yes.

- A rascal's prank!
- "Usurping of titles."

"An 80,000 Liras fine."

And finally, a recent fine report.

It's the drop
that has the vase overflow.

Dolfin, write.
Three copies and tracing paper.

- Write.
- Please.

Yesterday, at about 4 p.m.
four emissaries, dangerous men

of an international gang,
came to my home

submitting a very profitable
deal to me.

Since you could recuperate
important Etruscan findings,

let me ask you,
what would I get from this?

I don't understand.

If a Finance marshal,
waiting for a promotion,

foresees and stops a big heist
of Etruscan artifacts,

does he get promoted or not?

Yes, he gets promoted.

So what do I gain
with this information?

Dolfin, what are you doing?
Are you writing?

- You told me to.
- Go out there.

Close the door.

Stupid!

- Cigarette?
- No, thank you.

- Cappuccino?
- No.

This is something big.

Just think if the Carabinieri
of Colle Civitella found out.

Marshall Capriotti!
I was just imagining...

Did you know he arrested
two criminals under my jurisdiction?

I went to bed at 5 a.m.
He is a vampire!

He always tries
to screw the Finance Guards.

He descends from the mountains
like a wolf, and trespasses!

- He is arrogant.
- It's true.

In fact, marshal.
Think it over carefully.

- Here...
- Who is the boss?

We don't know who the boss is.

We only know
he's an international big shot.

But you could get him
at the refinery

where he will pick up
the stolen goods.

- Is that clear?
- Of course.

- Then give me two men.
- What men?

Two men who...

- Boteon! Santolin! Finance Guards.
- Present.

Santolin is the most intelligent
and Boteon is the fastest.

They don't seem too bright to me.

Let's hope for the best.

Officer,
is the marshal in his office?

- No, he's in church.
- Thank you.

What do I get out of it?

The boss will probably
come from abroad,

maybe in a helicopter.
He is a very important person.

This time it's not about
two vases or a few bronze statues.

This is an international
organization.

Think about it.

In exchange,
what should I do for you?

Get rid of surveillance
and return my passport.

I can't.

Just think if the Finance Guard
found out.

You are Lock Pick
and you are Pigface.

Couldn't I be Lock Pick?

Pigface is more suited to him.

- How dare you?
- It doesn't matter.

What matters is that you
don't arouse suspicion.

Act indifferently. The gang guys
just passed behind you.

I'd arrest those two right away.

We must catch the whole gang,
above all the gang boss.

They've such hoodlum faces!

They're supposedly
the shrewdest in the gang.

Follow me, please.

Father Cosimo! Father!

Father, I wanted to say hello.

- What a fall!
- The priest fell.

- Help me.
- Your hat.

Father, did you get hurt?

I'm leaving, going to Switzerland.

- Father, do you need anything?
- No, I don't.

Understand? Nothing! This jinx!

I'll return in spring, like swallows.

Marshal, the museum
doesn't risk anything.

Jackass. We'll give you
the key ourselves.

- What?
- The hit must be successful.

It absolutely must.

- We thought...
- Don't think. Only I think.

I'd like to arrest them only if...

We must catch
the organization's boss.

He is the big fish!
I don't care about those idiots.

- We should steal with them?
- Yes!

You still don't understand?

There are alarm systems
that go off.

- They could arrest us.
- Arrest police officers?

We're not sure anymore.

Who will protect us?

What's important

is that you scrupulously follow

the schedule I established. Come!

With my changes,
I think the hit is perfect now.

For the alarm signal,
we could call an electrician.

And we'll fix the matter.

Let's go on. What's left?

The showcase window keys?

We'll call Trentin
who is also a blacksmith.

He'll take care of it. Let's go on.

When we leave with the stolen items,
there's a guard at the intersection.

That won't worry us.
I'll call the guard here.

If it's necessary.
I'll hold him here a few days.

- And the watches?
- Right.

We'll use the Swiss ones
we confiscated from the Neapolitans.

- My uncle forgave you.
- Why?

I'll explain.
I told him that you'd marry me,

and he said, "Are you sure?"

I replied, "As long as
you don't kill him".

He said, "I'm not that senile".
We'll get married!

- I am busy now.
- We'll crown our dream of love.

- My friends are waiting for me.
- Abandon yourself.

- Come on!
- What is it?

I see. Your friends
don't like me.

No. They always talk about you
and your uncle.

- They'll be happy if we marry.
- I must ask them first.

What? They're not
your father and mother.

No, but they are...

Listen to me, and reason.

On one side you have me.

I have a farm with two cows,
three pigs, a donkey,

23 hens and a home
with tv set and refrigerator.

There's enough for a nice future.

I know.

On the other side,
there are 3 scoundrels, losers,

who sooner or later
will end up in jail.

- Now you must choose.
- Now?

Yes, now.

Either them or me.
Who do you choose?

I've already thought about it.
I'm no longer a kid.

It's what I think too.

One must give importance
to important things in life.

I'm sorry, but you are right.
We must be men.

- I knew I'd enchained you.
- What did you understand?

- You mean you choose your friends?
- Of course.

You scoundrel!
Who do you think you are?

You're a poor loser,
and I didn't want to humiliate you.

But you don't look like
Lucio Battisti at all.

- Who gives a darn!
- He is a gentleman.

Here, you ugly son of a bitch!

Does a contrasting love
last so little?

First little curls, little curls,
and now...

Lice hair! Here!

Damn you!

And I even think you're a fag.

- Fuck off.
- You deceived a young girl!

I could be your grandson
you're so old.

Lallo is right in saying
that you're an alley cat.

Take this!

And this is for those scoundrel
friends of yours!

How much will they give us
for 300 million?

Asvero, if they catch us,
how much do you think we'll get?

Two years ago, just for one head,
Vittorio got 6 months.

Then we'll get life in prison.

- They have to catch us first.
- Sunflower, you feel like laughing?

No, like crying.
The guards scare me.

Stay put, Curly.

We'll go to the refinery.
Novembersecond is there.

We'll hand it all over him.

Black cockroach was right.
What's his name...? Pigface.

It's just a matter of time.

They even gave us
four cool watches.

You can tell
they're real criminals.

That blond guy has
a real thief's face.

Even if they catch us,
it's still robbery.

- With breaking in.
- Lallo, what do you say?

Anything is fine with me.

But Lock Pick is armed and has
a gun this big under his jacket.

Armed robbery. Did we forget
anything else?

I don't want to back out,
but let's leave Sunflower out of it.

That's right!

I am not afraid of jail,
I'm afraid of getting beat up.

So... Here.

Take the watch back.

Wait for me, Sunflower.

I changed my mind.
I'm staying with Sunflower.

Curly, we're alone, and we're few.
What can I say?

- You too?
- You do it.

You always say
you're worth all of us. Do it!

- You scums. You'll leave me?
- He's offended.

You can't leave me. Beggars!

I am your boss. Stop!

- I order you!
- Curly.

Damn you!

That alley cat was right.
I'll bust you!

You have to be born
for certain things.

Think it over carefully.

- You are cowards.
- No, it's a matter of friendship.

- What's that mean?
- Forget it.

- No, speak up.
- Reason.

Sunflower doesn't feel up to it,
and I think he is right.

It's a big hit,
but it's not for us.

I can't explain it, but I'm convinced

that if we don't stay united,

our friendship will end. Right?

The friendship would have ended
even if we'd made the hit.

- Why?
- The money!

You'll go to America,
Asvero to Berlin to find his dad,

Lallo will return to Rome to open
a restaurant, and I'll be alone.

I've a grandma.
She's old and I can't expatriate.

Who will tell the others?

They beat me up.

Look, touch. Please.

- There's a scar.
- The Finance Guard did it.

It couldn't have been.
A policeman did it.

They used a club.

They never had a club.

- What do you care?
- You're arguing now?

For a pigeon, like kids.
A live pigeon who I wanted to keep.

Since then, he's been scared.
He can't help it.

The four of us
are always together.

We don't want to create problems.
You understand...

What do you want to do?

We've decided.
We're backing out.

I can assure you that
in article 442 of the Penal Code,

law of April 7, 1962,
you'd get a minimum sentence.

- It's the minimum.
- Yes, but not the beatings.

- And so?
- So "one hand washes the other".

You're in that field,
you should understand.

- We must do that hit.
- Alone?

You are four.

You always say that one of you
is worth two of us.

- So you are eight.
- But we must inform the boss.

He doesn't give a darn.
As long as the hit's a success.

We are content with little.

- You're content with what?
- With a modest payoff.

- A payoff?
- How much?

- It's a big hit.
- And a cool one.

- Make your offer.
- For the idea.

16 and 17.

They didn't even reach 20,000.

How much is 17 divided by 4?

Someone got 1,000 Liras more!
Who was it?

Me! My family has increased.

Agony lives with us.
He eats like a madman.

He says he wants to marry Grandma.

We'll pick you up with the van.
We're going to the beach.

Sign here.

They were 6.
Now there are only 2 to follow.

It'll be easier for you
when you arrest them.

- Thank you.
- Does he always eat like this?

- No, he has an upset stomach today.
- It's scary.

In your place, I'd see a doctor.

- Maybe he has tapeworm.
- I had it.

But at the infirmary they said
I absorbed it.

- You ate even that!
- Eat the flower in the glass!

- Who wants to play Tresette?
- I'll win the lunch money.

- We'll get to 21. OK?
- Yes.

- 21 is my game.
- Alright.

- Shall we make it 5,000?
- Alright.

Do you mind if we play with mine?

- Alright.
- Give me 5,000. I want to laugh.

- You want to cut the deck?
- No, to shuffle.

- You don't trust me?
- One never knows.

Raise.

"May I, madam?
Shall we play a game?"

"Mine is to 21. Let's make it
5,000 a hit. I want to laugh."

This idiot!

Fuck off!

That witch was a magician.

"Madam, let's do a return game."

I'd like to have seen you
in my place.

Stop. I'll kill you.

Stop!

- Sunflower, do you feel ill?
- He killed himself with spaghetti.

No. I'm fine. I was thinking
of the cockroach, of Pigface.

Poor things.
They're criminals, but...

What do you care?
They're doing the hit tomorrow.

In fact. If they get caught...

Stop! I can't go on.

You lost 24,000 Liras!

- Be a sir!
- Did you mean that I'm stingy?

- Yes, you are!
- Repeat it!

- Come on, Curly!
- You see these?

It's the money
for the van engine.

- Stop!
- Are you crazy?

- I'll show you.
It's 40,000 Liras. I'll burn it.

- Are you drunk?
- Come on!

It's our money too.

Whoever gets close is a dead man.

- You said I'm stingy!
- Idiot, what do you want to do?

- Whoever gets close is a dead man!
- The money! He burned it!

You guys are good, huh?

This boss is a big shot.

It could be a northern monarch.

So if it's possible to arrest him,

I will personally carry that out.

This time,
dear Marshal Capriotti...

- What date did they decide?
- Tomorrow.

The custodian lives in the castle.

What if he sees or hears
from upstairs?

- What is his name?
- Ciarozzi Fernando, age 35, single.

- Northern faggot immigrant.
- Oh, he's gay!

Bring him here at 5.

Darn!

A policeman who steals
isn't something you see every day.

Let's take a nice picture.

Go! Take off!

Don't get too close
or they'll see us.

The boss could take
the helicopter. He'll arrive at 7.

He's an important person.

Here he is! Here's
the stolen stuff with the thieves.

The bait is ready. Let's wait
for the big fish to bite.

Marshal, will we be here till dawn?

Someone must have talked.

Someone advised him.

- Who?
- The boss.

It's useless to wait any longer.

Let's recuperate the stuff and arrest
the delinquents. Give the signal!

- Full speed ahead!
- Yes.

Here's the boss. Turn on the lights.
Precede all the cars. Go!

Attention!
Ready to open fire!

They had accomplices
and bodyguards.

Get ready for the attack.

It's two gangs who
are arguing over the stolen stuff.

Let's defend ourselves!

Someone betrayed.

Hurry! Our tear gas bomb!

Hurry, Visigato, jump down.
Pull!

Let's leave.
We must save the loot!

Right, yes.

Drop your arms. Surrender!

Cease fire!
Come forward with your hands up!

We will never give up!
Criminals!

Fire, guys! Fire all you want!

- Please, sit down.
- Thank you, reverend.

Marshal Capriotti,
in this brilliant operation,

you found yourself face to face
with the delinquents.

Will you be able to
recognize anyone?

Fine! You must have seen
who shot you.

- Damn...
- Please, enough. Go away.

That bastard hit me
a couple of feet away.

- Could you describe him?
- One of the usual southerners...

I don't want to seem biased,

but he was one of those black,
obtuse, sleazy southerners.

A delinquent. I will catch him.

- And the others?
- They were the usual four...

Four very dangerous,
very shrewd individuals,

perhaps tied to American crime life.

- Connected with the mafia.
- One last question.

It is true the gang used arms
given to the Police Forces?

No comment.

Curly, did you read?

There was a shooting.
A miracle saved us.

You must thank Asvero and me.

Don't trust the fact that you float
because of a law of Nature.

The water is cold!

But Pigface and the others...

They didn't catch them.

Because I...

The police!

- Asvero, the Finance Guard!
- Let's go! Run!

- Asvero, run!
- Here I am!

Why are they running? Stop!

Go!

Be careful!

- Don't be an idiot.
- I knew...

Hurry. Let's get inside.

Close!

Hold on tight!

Are we going backwards?

Go!

Why did we run away?

We were to act indifferent.
They weren't looking for us.

Yes, they were.

- This is a lovely car. What's this?
- Hold still.

It's cold!

What cold air! I'm cold. Close it.

- It's like a hurricane.
- Must be the "air unconditioning".

- Close it.
- I can't. It's broken.

Yes, SCV license. Received.
Let's go, guys.

Did you see?
That's how you open the trunk.

Lallo, I'm scared.

Let's leave it here
and walk back.

We've been speeding
for an hour. It's 100 kilometers!

There are cardinal clothes.

- Let's walk back.
- There're hats!

Do as I say. Leave it here.

Will they notice us less
dressed like this?

Sure!
If they see this costly car

with poor guys like us on it,
they'll stop us.

But if there is a bishop,
a cardinal and a monsignor on it,

it's normal.
- It's dangerous to act as cardinals.

Sunflower, calm down.
We'll take a mountain road,

leave the car
and run through the fields.

Are you really afraid?

No, I am just tired.

What do you want to do?

- What the others do.
- Load bricks?

Yes. If we found a nice job...

Curly, the police!

Marshal, that was the car.

Hello?
We went by the signaled car.

Call road block 7.
We're following it.

Detach two motorcyclists
from the Aurelia,

kilometer 146, at the intersection
with the underground passage. Over.

- Where does this road lead to?
- San Crispino. I know it.

It comes out towards Rocca di Pietra.

Not even Jesus Christ
can stop us now.

- What is it?
- Darn! Honk!

They won't move.

- What happened?
- Who are you? Go!

- Go!
- How many are they?

- A procession.
- The bishop is here!

- I am Jesus Christ.
- Curly, honk.

- We're stuck.
- They think we are real priests.

- I am the mother.
- Do something. Go forward slowly.

They came with a car from Rome.

- They blocked us.
- Smile.

What'll we do? They won't move.

- Let's play along.
- Darn it!

I knew it was dangerous
to act as cardinals.

Silence!

Welcome, Eminence.
Give us your holy blessing.

I bless you in the name of the Pope,
the Son and St. Peter and Paul.

- Come on, Sunflower.
- Long live the bishop!

Let us through. Excuse us.

- Long live the bishop!
- Don't bite!

Excuse us. Let us through.

His Eminence is tired.
Asvero, remove this warrior.

Praise Mary!

Oh, God, the police!

What're you doing?

Make way! Make way!
Stop those delinquents!

Where are you going? Stop!

Make way, please!

Lallo! Help! Make way!

Move!

- Sacrilege!
- Let me go! I don't know anything!

- They arrested the bishop!
- Lallo!

You think I'm a jerk because I carry
this cross? I'll massacre you!

Asvero! No, not on my head!

They're arresting the priests!

I am Republican. Long live Mazzini!

Who do you think
will be in command now?

I don't know. They just hit me.