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1
00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:03,757
That is why I think
I should be your choice
2
00:00:03,820 --> 00:00:05,656
for our club president.
3
00:00:05,687 --> 00:00:06,695
Thank you.
4
00:00:06,711 --> 00:00:08,611
So, how does this work?
5
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,242
Is there, like, a ballot box, or...?
6
00:00:12,227 --> 00:00:14,093
- Yes!
- Aaron, what the heck?!
7
00:00:14,162 --> 00:00:16,829
["BORN TO BE WILD" PLAYS]
8
00:00:16,898 --> 00:00:18,464
No. They wouldn't.
9
00:00:19,534 --> 00:00:22,101
? Get your wheelchair van runnin' ?
10
00:00:22,170 --> 00:00:24,637
? Annual DiMeo road trip ?
11
00:00:24,706 --> 00:00:27,774
- I call vice president!
- ? It's getting harder to surprise you ?
12
00:00:27,842 --> 00:00:29,208
? So we're doing this at school ?
13
00:00:29,277 --> 00:00:30,977
Ray, I think your parents are that way.
14
00:00:31,046 --> 00:00:32,412
Thanks! Say hi to them for me.
15
00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:33,980
? Hopefully, you're more
excited than embarrassed ?
16
00:00:34,049 --> 00:00:36,683
? Some people think it's cool
when dads can play guitar ?
17
00:00:36,751 --> 00:00:39,719
[SCREAMING] ? Dylan and JJ
will have joined us by this point ?
18
00:00:39,788 --> 00:00:42,922
? Ray's likely runnin' away ?
19
00:00:42,991 --> 00:00:44,223
Two, three, four!
20
00:00:44,292 --> 00:00:49,162
? Vans can move fa-a-a-ster
than people ?
21
00:00:49,352 --> 00:00:52,165
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
22
00:00:53,902 --> 00:00:55,168
Oh, thanks again, Kenneth.
23
00:00:55,236 --> 00:00:56,569
You got it all, right?
24
00:00:56,638 --> 00:00:58,438
Take care of the dog,
leave a few lights on, and...
25
00:00:58,506 --> 00:00:59,772
Oh.
26
00:00:59,841 --> 00:01:01,774
The cabinet above the fridge...
whatever you do,
27
00:01:01,843 --> 00:01:04,844
please... do not look in there.
28
00:01:04,913 --> 00:01:06,679
Don't make up forbidden spaces
29
00:01:06,748 --> 00:01:08,181
to make your life seem interesting.
30
00:01:08,249 --> 00:01:09,782
Aw! You know me!
31
00:01:12,153 --> 00:01:13,653
DiMeos. You're leaving?
32
00:01:13,722 --> 00:01:14,987
But our fundraiser's starting.
33
00:01:15,056 --> 00:01:16,723
You said you'd be there when I told you
34
00:01:16,791 --> 00:01:18,791
we'd approved the funds
to upgrade the elevator.
35
00:01:18,860 --> 00:01:20,993
Oh, yeah. Right.
36
00:01:21,062 --> 00:01:22,261
Yeah, and I will be there.
37
00:01:22,330 --> 00:01:24,230
Oh, wonderful!
38
00:01:24,299 --> 00:01:26,499
Wait. Are you lying again for sport?
39
00:01:26,568 --> 00:01:28,267
TBD, darling.
40
00:01:28,336 --> 00:01:30,937
"Let's," H-I... "hit the road, baby!"
41
00:01:31,005 --> 00:01:32,271
I don't want to go to a fundraiser
42
00:01:32,340 --> 00:01:34,307
and make small talk with strangers.
43
00:01:34,375 --> 00:01:36,375
I'm invisible, and no one listens to me.
44
00:01:36,444 --> 00:01:37,677
Let's go to the fundraiser.
45
00:01:37,746 --> 00:01:39,212
- What'd you say?
- Not important.
46
00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,080
You know, we committed to it,
47
00:01:41,149 --> 00:01:43,382
and I've committed
to doing 1 out of 10 things
48
00:01:43,451 --> 00:01:44,717
I commit to.
49
00:01:44,786 --> 00:01:46,753
Helps me win arguments
about my lack of commitment.
50
00:01:46,821 --> 00:01:48,054
We'll just do a quick spin-through,
51
00:01:48,123 --> 00:01:49,355
say "Thank you for the elevator,"
52
00:01:49,424 --> 00:01:50,790
and then we'll be on the road in a jiff.
53
00:01:50,859 --> 00:01:52,058
You'll be alright for
a few minutes, kids, won't you?
54
00:01:52,127 --> 00:01:53,226
- No problem.
- Sure.
55
00:01:54,796 --> 00:01:56,329
[VAN DOORS CLOSE]
56
00:01:56,397 --> 00:01:58,531
Oh! Why are you throwing things at me?!
57
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:01,467
- Oh! Did Mom pack everything we own?!
- [SIGHS]
58
00:02:01,536 --> 00:02:03,369
No! Those are our road-trip snacks!
59
00:02:03,438 --> 00:02:06,038
You eat those now,
we'll have nothing to eat later.
60
00:02:06,107 --> 00:02:09,142
Allow me to explain the concept
of delayed gratification.
61
00:02:09,210 --> 00:02:10,710
Allow me to explain the concept
62
00:02:10,779 --> 00:02:12,712
of eating like Cookie Monster.
63
00:02:12,781 --> 00:02:14,680
Nom, nom, nom, nom,
nom, nom, nom, nom...
64
00:02:14,749 --> 00:02:16,082
You're not even ingesting them!
65
00:02:16,151 --> 00:02:17,150
...nom, nom, nom, nom, nom...
66
00:02:17,218 --> 00:02:20,653
[DISCO MUSIC PLAYS]
67
00:02:20,722 --> 00:02:22,922
Ooh! A '70s theme.
68
00:02:22,991 --> 00:02:25,158
Where are the long lines for gas?
69
00:02:25,226 --> 00:02:27,026
Oh! Too soon!
70
00:02:27,095 --> 00:02:28,928
Let's do a lap and leave, shall we?
71
00:02:28,997 --> 00:02:30,329
If we get trapped in a conversation
72
00:02:30,398 --> 00:02:32,465
and we need help,
the code word is "Winnebago".
73
00:02:32,534 --> 00:02:34,109
Don't worry. I'm not having
any conversations.
74
00:02:34,133 --> 00:02:35,084
There's a nacho bar.
75
00:02:35,109 --> 00:02:36,702
Have I told you
about my new nacho system,
76
00:02:36,771 --> 00:02:39,205
where every bite has
the perfect distribution of...
77
00:02:39,274 --> 00:02:40,339
Winnebago.
78
00:02:40,408 --> 00:02:41,707
I'll get us a drink, love.
79
00:02:44,579 --> 00:02:46,612
- Oh.
- Do you mind if I take it? I need it.
80
00:02:46,681 --> 00:02:48,815
I'm not good
in social situations. Thanks.
81
00:02:50,852 --> 00:02:52,285
Okay, see? That was rude.
82
00:02:52,353 --> 00:02:53,986
Oh, no, I assure you, I'm no better.
83
00:02:54,055 --> 00:02:55,521
Luckily, I'm lawless.
84
00:02:55,590 --> 00:02:57,557
Got to be something to steal under here.
85
00:02:57,625 --> 00:02:58,624
Alright.
86
00:02:58,693 --> 00:03:00,993
Is there a famous '70s lesbian?
87
00:03:01,062 --> 00:03:02,862
Because I am her for you right now.
88
00:03:02,931 --> 00:03:04,330
[LAUGHS]
89
00:03:04,399 --> 00:03:05,865
There he is!
90
00:03:05,934 --> 00:03:07,166
Alright!
91
00:03:07,235 --> 00:03:09,068
No one is paying attention to me!
92
00:03:09,137 --> 00:03:10,803
I store loose change in my butt!
93
00:03:10,872 --> 00:03:12,638
Hey! Why do you do that?
94
00:03:12,707 --> 00:03:14,640
And why are you yelling
about it at this party?
95
00:03:14,709 --> 00:03:15,641
You're back.
96
00:03:15,710 --> 00:03:16,676
You're deejaying this thing?
97
00:03:16,744 --> 00:03:18,611
Yeah, well, after being iced
98
00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:20,713
by a certain physical therapist of JJ's,
99
00:03:20,782 --> 00:03:22,715
I could use a little female attention,
100
00:03:22,784 --> 00:03:24,383
and ladies love deejays.
101
00:03:24,452 --> 00:03:27,587
So when they asked me,
I... [SNAPS] hustled
102
00:03:27,655 --> 00:03:30,389
and got my deejay equipment out of my...
103
00:03:30,458 --> 00:03:32,625
? Brick apartment ?
104
00:03:32,694 --> 00:03:33,793
You have fun.
105
00:03:33,862 --> 00:03:36,329
I'm going to...
106
00:03:36,397 --> 00:03:37,763
get the hell out of here.
107
00:03:37,832 --> 00:03:39,866
[BOTH LAUGH]
108
00:03:39,934 --> 00:03:43,102
I thought I was the only one
who sided with United!
109
00:03:43,171 --> 00:03:45,571
- No, I get it. Get off the plane, man!
- Get off!
110
00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:46,539
[BOTH LAUGH]
111
00:03:46,608 --> 00:03:48,007
Shall we, honey?
112
00:03:48,076 --> 00:03:50,743
- Ohh, sorry. I've got to head out.
- No! Don't go!
113
00:03:50,812 --> 00:03:52,678
- Oh, no, I'll leave you the booze.
- Oh, sweet.
114
00:03:52,747 --> 00:03:54,580
Although the fact
that you knew to do that
115
00:03:54,649 --> 00:03:57,416
is actually why I am sad
that you're leaving. [SIGHS]
116
00:03:57,485 --> 00:04:00,553
- It was so nice to meet you, Maya.
- So nice to meet you, Sarah.
117
00:04:00,622 --> 00:04:03,022
- See ya.
- Bye.
118
00:04:03,091 --> 00:04:05,691
Ohh! I really liked her!
119
00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:08,027
Did you see how disappointed
she was when I was leaving?
120
00:04:08,096 --> 00:04:10,396
Yeah, but did you see
how happy I am that we are?
121
00:04:10,465 --> 00:04:11,864
- Aaah!
- Come on. Can we just stay a bit longer?
122
00:04:11,933 --> 00:04:13,366
We've been at this school
for over a year,
123
00:04:13,434 --> 00:04:15,001
and it's the first time
I've connected with a parent.
124
00:04:15,069 --> 00:04:17,370
Plus, I'm very good at '70s dancing.
125
00:04:17,438 --> 00:04:18,771
[SIGHS] Should we tell the kids?
126
00:04:18,840 --> 00:04:21,274
The kids know that I'm good
at '70s dancing.
127
00:04:21,342 --> 00:04:23,676
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
128
00:04:23,745 --> 00:04:25,511
You liked another mom? Really?
129
00:04:25,580 --> 00:04:27,446
Look at you... going to fundraisers,
130
00:04:27,515 --> 00:04:28,948
making connections.
131
00:04:29,017 --> 00:04:30,616
Someone's becoming
part of the community.
132
00:04:30,685 --> 00:04:33,286
Why do you have to find
larger themes in everything?
133
00:04:33,354 --> 00:04:34,520
Look, we're still gonna go
on the road trip,
134
00:04:34,589 --> 00:04:35,888
but just in a few hours.
135
00:04:35,957 --> 00:04:38,724
Here... walk to something fun
and enjoy each other.
136
00:04:38,793 --> 00:04:41,560
- Mini golf it is.
- "Movie."
137
00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:43,396
No! Arcade, you idiots!
138
00:04:43,464 --> 00:04:44,463
[KNOCK ON VAN]
139
00:04:44,495 --> 00:04:45,538
You're parked in a loading zone.
140
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:47,366
Move it, or I'm gonna have you towed.
141
00:04:47,435 --> 00:04:48,534
I'm gonna go tell Mom and Dad.
142
00:04:48,603 --> 00:04:51,070
Just drive up 5 feet
and find another spot.
143
00:04:51,139 --> 00:04:52,571
But I don't have a license.
144
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,907
Neither did the Wright brothers,
and they soared.
145
00:04:54,976 --> 00:04:55,919
JJ: [SIGHS]
146
00:04:55,997 --> 00:04:58,110
"You don't always
have to be the bummer."
147
00:04:58,179 --> 00:05:00,146
"Do it. Do it."
148
00:05:00,214 --> 00:05:02,014
[CHANTING] "Do it! Do it!"
149
00:05:02,083 --> 00:05:03,482
Do it! Do it!
150
00:05:03,551 --> 00:05:05,484
Do it! Do it! Do it!
151
00:05:05,553 --> 00:05:09,121
Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!
152
00:05:09,190 --> 00:05:10,990
- [ENGINE STARTS]
- No way!
153
00:05:11,059 --> 00:05:12,325
You did it?! You psycho!
154
00:05:13,561 --> 00:05:14,794
MAYA: Ohh!
155
00:05:14,862 --> 00:05:16,495
Try these.
156
00:05:17,765 --> 00:05:18,965
Ohhhhh!
157
00:05:19,033 --> 00:05:20,266
And these.
158
00:05:20,335 --> 00:05:22,201
JIMMY: Whatever this is is gonna suck.
159
00:05:22,270 --> 00:05:24,270
- Yep.
- Oh, just try them on.
160
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:28,240
Mm! Upside.
161
00:05:28,309 --> 00:05:30,242
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
162
00:05:30,311 --> 00:05:37,883
?
163
00:05:37,952 --> 00:05:39,585
Oh, I'm gonna go and find Sarah.
164
00:05:39,654 --> 00:05:43,055
Cool. I can't turn yet.
165
00:05:43,124 --> 00:05:44,790
- I'm back!
- [BOTH SCREAM]
166
00:05:44,859 --> 00:05:46,125
- Oh, my God!
- Sorry!
167
00:05:46,194 --> 00:05:48,294
Oh, don't apologize.
I love a dramatic reveal.
168
00:05:48,363 --> 00:05:49,362
[BOTH LAUGH]
169
00:05:49,430 --> 00:05:50,629
I love fringe.
170
00:05:50,698 --> 00:05:52,131
- It's great!
- It's good for hustling.
171
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:53,499
[LAUGHS]
172
00:05:53,568 --> 00:05:56,002
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
173
00:05:57,472 --> 00:05:59,171
Oh! Excuse me, big guy.
174
00:06:00,742 --> 00:06:03,542
- Who is this tall drink of water?
- [CHUCKLES]
175
00:06:03,611 --> 00:06:05,544
Ooh-ooh! Someone got tall.
176
00:06:05,613 --> 00:06:07,380
- Yeah!
- It's nice, right?
177
00:06:07,448 --> 00:06:10,416
When you're tall, it affects
the way people look at you.
178
00:06:10,485 --> 00:06:11,917
They assume you're intelligent...
179
00:06:11,986 --> 00:06:13,219
and entertaining.
180
00:06:13,287 --> 00:06:14,653
I've never thought that about you.
181
00:06:14,722 --> 00:06:15,921
Doubt me if you want, but it's true.
182
00:06:17,558 --> 00:06:19,425
My question about the '70s theme is,
183
00:06:19,494 --> 00:06:20,793
where's the long line for gas?
184
00:06:20,862 --> 00:06:24,597
[LAUGHTER]
185
00:06:26,401 --> 00:06:28,000
I'm so glad we met, Maya.
186
00:06:28,069 --> 00:06:30,102
So far, the only other friends
that I've made
187
00:06:30,171 --> 00:06:31,904
are other fencing-team moms.
188
00:06:31,973 --> 00:06:33,539
Jake's on the fencing team?
189
00:06:33,608 --> 00:06:35,541
I just remembered
another person's child's name.
190
00:06:35,610 --> 00:06:36,909
My brain must really like you.
191
00:06:36,978 --> 00:06:38,069
[LAUGHS]
192
00:06:38,124 --> 00:06:39,812
Jake was on the fencing team,
193
00:06:39,881 --> 00:06:41,981
but they canceled it
because of budget cuts.
194
00:06:42,050 --> 00:06:43,015
- Oh, no!
- Yeah.
195
00:06:43,084 --> 00:06:44,183
But they have enough money
196
00:06:44,252 --> 00:06:46,085
to upgrade the handicapped elevator?
197
00:06:47,655 --> 00:06:48,754
That's a bad thing?
198
00:06:48,823 --> 00:06:50,256
Well, it just seems extreme.
199
00:06:50,324 --> 00:06:51,590
Why should everyone else suffer
200
00:06:51,659 --> 00:06:53,692
just because of an elevator
that only two kids use?
201
00:06:54,429 --> 00:06:55,428
- Oh!
- Ooh!
202
00:06:55,496 --> 00:06:57,163
- You need some napkins?
- Yeah.
203
00:06:57,231 --> 00:06:59,031
Honey, making friends yet?
204
00:06:59,100 --> 00:07:00,533
No, darling. Just an enemy.
205
00:07:00,601 --> 00:07:02,501
Dy-no-mite!
206
00:07:04,588 --> 00:07:06,159
- [DISCO MUSIC PLAYS]
- [LAUGHS] Yeah!
207
00:07:06,213 --> 00:07:07,479
You're a good-looking crowd.
208
00:07:07,526 --> 00:07:08,792
Let's get to know each other.
209
00:07:08,860 --> 00:07:11,962
All the single ladies,
let me hear you scream!
210
00:07:17,436 --> 00:07:19,703
Wait, wait. For real?
211
00:07:19,771 --> 00:07:22,405
Uh... well, alright,
are there any single ladies,
212
00:07:22,474 --> 00:07:23,740
or are you just not a screaming crowd?
213
00:07:23,809 --> 00:07:25,275
Um, well, all the married ladies,
214
00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:27,010
let me hear you scream!
215
00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:30,447
[WOMEN SCREAMING]
216
00:07:30,515 --> 00:07:31,915
Okay, alright.
217
00:07:31,984 --> 00:07:33,950
Just give me a moment while I, uh,
218
00:07:34,019 --> 00:07:36,453
try to figure out why I agreed
to do this for free.
219
00:07:36,521 --> 00:07:38,355
Then she complained to me... to me...
220
00:07:38,423 --> 00:07:40,357
that this school does too much
for kids with disability.
221
00:07:40,425 --> 00:07:41,524
I mean, know your audience.
222
00:07:41,593 --> 00:07:42,826
Well, clearly she doesn't,
223
00:07:42,894 --> 00:07:44,527
and you should use that
to your advantage.
224
00:07:44,596 --> 00:07:46,496
And I'm going to. Did you get smarter?
225
00:07:46,565 --> 00:07:47,697
Yes.
226
00:07:47,766 --> 00:07:49,666
All my good thoughts are up here.
227
00:07:49,735 --> 00:07:51,701
Down here is just...
228
00:07:51,770 --> 00:07:54,771
TV theme songs, strong opinions
on new KFC offerings...
229
00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:55,939
stuff like that.
230
00:07:56,008 --> 00:07:57,340
She probably has a whole gang of them.
231
00:07:57,409 --> 00:07:59,109
Well, I'm gonna go undercover
as a typical mom,
232
00:07:59,177 --> 00:08:01,378
I'm gonna find out who they are,
and I'm gonna give them hell.
233
00:08:01,446 --> 00:08:02,445
You okay?
234
00:08:02,514 --> 00:08:04,681
You're normally much more happy
235
00:08:04,750 --> 00:08:06,149
when hell's about to be given.
236
00:08:06,218 --> 00:08:07,617
It's just...
237
00:08:07,686 --> 00:08:09,719
I really liked her.
238
00:08:09,788 --> 00:08:12,155
Well, I... I really like
the top of your head.
239
00:08:12,224 --> 00:08:13,490
[SMOOCHES]
240
00:08:13,558 --> 00:08:14,591
- [HORNS HONKING]
- DYLAN: Where are we going, Ray?
241
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,292
There are no parking spaces!
242
00:08:18,263 --> 00:08:19,829
Oh. Those can't be functional.
243
00:08:19,898 --> 00:08:21,197
[HORN BLARES]
244
00:08:21,266 --> 00:08:23,466
Hey! You! Learn how to drive, Grandpa!
245
00:08:25,404 --> 00:08:27,704
That's right... I am your grandpa!
246
00:08:27,773 --> 00:08:29,939
Because I made love to your grandma.
247
00:08:30,008 --> 00:08:32,509
And she told me she wasn't proud of you.
248
00:08:32,577 --> 00:08:34,344
[ENGINE REVS]
249
00:08:36,415 --> 00:08:37,881
"Ray's being bad.
250
00:08:37,949 --> 00:08:39,049
I like it."
251
00:08:39,117 --> 00:08:41,251
Really? You guys like the new Ray?
252
00:08:41,319 --> 00:08:44,721
Excuse us for being gushy,
but this has to be said.
253
00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:46,189
You are not a loser.
254
00:08:46,258 --> 00:08:48,258
?
255
00:08:48,326 --> 00:08:50,293
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
256
00:08:50,362 --> 00:08:53,897
Okay, so, no single ladies screamed,
257
00:08:53,965 --> 00:08:56,800
which means either
there are no single ladies
258
00:08:56,868 --> 00:09:00,437
or they are here but they're shy.
259
00:09:00,505 --> 00:09:02,138
So let's try this.
260
00:09:02,163 --> 00:09:03,106
Married ladies...
261
00:09:03,175 --> 00:09:04,240
[WOMEN SCREAM]
262
00:09:04,309 --> 00:09:06,776
Let me finish!
263
00:09:06,845 --> 00:09:10,280
If you're married and you know
a single lady who's here,
264
00:09:10,348 --> 00:09:11,815
make some noise!
265
00:09:14,019 --> 00:09:15,285
[MICROPHONE THUMPS]
266
00:09:15,353 --> 00:09:16,686
No single moms?
267
00:09:16,755 --> 00:09:19,355
Divorce just isn't a thing
at this school?
268
00:09:19,424 --> 00:09:20,457
Okay, okay. Alright.
269
00:09:20,525 --> 00:09:21,858
We're not done here.
270
00:09:21,927 --> 00:09:23,026
Do the hustle.
271
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:24,260
? Do the hustle! ?
272
00:09:24,329 --> 00:09:25,495
DR. MILLER: Hey, foxes!
273
00:09:25,564 --> 00:09:27,997
[CHUCKLING] Okay, group photo time!
274
00:09:28,066 --> 00:09:30,366
Jimmy. Tall guys in the back.
275
00:09:30,435 --> 00:09:31,735
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
276
00:09:31,803 --> 00:09:32,769
I'm in the back.
277
00:09:32,838 --> 00:09:34,571
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]
278
00:09:34,639 --> 00:09:35,605
[MUSIC CONTINUES]
279
00:09:37,709 --> 00:09:39,109
So, these are your friends?
280
00:09:39,177 --> 00:09:42,011
You're the moms against renovating
the handicapped elevator?
281
00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:45,115
I mean, that's not, like,
our official title.
282
00:09:45,183 --> 00:09:47,584
Well, I'm with you ladies all the way.
283
00:09:47,652 --> 00:09:49,452
I mean, why should our kids suffer
284
00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:52,355
just to cater to some small minority?
285
00:09:52,424 --> 00:09:54,791
You know, actually, I think
most of those kids are faking.
286
00:09:54,860 --> 00:09:57,293
They don't need wheelchairs.
They're just bloody lazy.
287
00:09:57,362 --> 00:09:58,728
I wouldn't go that far.
288
00:09:58,797 --> 00:10:00,430
- I bet she's right.
- Name? Name?
289
00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:07,036
We have a plan, though,
and it's going down tonight.
290
00:10:07,105 --> 00:10:08,371
There's a plan? What plan?
291
00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:09,639
DR. MILLER: Wow, you can dance!
292
00:10:09,708 --> 00:10:11,474
Everybody, look at Maya!
293
00:10:11,543 --> 00:10:12,709
- Wha...
- [CROWD "OOH" S]
294
00:10:12,778 --> 00:10:14,711
Is there... Can...
295
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:15,812
[GROANS]
296
00:10:15,881 --> 00:10:17,881
Foiled again by my excellent hustling!
297
00:10:19,084 --> 00:10:20,250
How are you, Kenneth?
298
00:10:20,318 --> 00:10:21,718
I love being tall!
299
00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:23,853
I want this night to last forever.
300
00:10:23,922 --> 00:10:25,789
I'm confident.
I'm connecting with people.
301
00:10:25,857 --> 00:10:27,223
I-I'm never going back.
302
00:10:27,292 --> 00:10:28,758
Well, I-I love having you up here,
303
00:10:28,827 --> 00:10:31,895
but you belong back down there, Jimmy.
304
00:10:31,963 --> 00:10:33,029
No.
305
00:10:33,098 --> 00:10:35,465
It... It can't end. I won't let it.
306
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:37,066
These things are staying on!
307
00:10:37,135 --> 00:10:38,334
Jim...
308
00:10:38,403 --> 00:10:39,469
Jimmy!
309
00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,607
Okay, um, uh,
let's forget the "single" thing.
310
00:10:44,676 --> 00:10:47,143
Um, I'd like something
to come out of tonight.
311
00:10:47,212 --> 00:10:51,214
Uh, anyone interested in
an '09 Wrangler with low miles,
312
00:10:51,283 --> 00:10:52,816
make some noise!
313
00:10:54,519 --> 00:10:55,952
Of course.
314
00:10:56,021 --> 00:10:58,354
God forbid even my car
gets some love tonight!
315
00:10:58,423 --> 00:11:01,624
"School's back that way."
316
00:11:01,693 --> 00:11:03,293
And so is the old me.
317
00:11:03,361 --> 00:11:06,095
We're supposed to be going
on a road trip, aren't we?
318
00:11:06,164 --> 00:11:08,798
Now, let's be on a road trip.
319
00:11:08,867 --> 00:11:10,967
O-Okay, but pay attention to the road.
320
00:11:11,036 --> 00:11:14,137
Y-Y-You can do a lot of damage
with a 4,000-pound van.
321
00:11:14,206 --> 00:11:15,638
I like the way you think.
322
00:11:15,707 --> 00:11:17,307
We do have too much stuff back there.
323
00:11:17,375 --> 00:11:19,609
[THE UNDERTONES' "TEENAGE KICKS" PLAYS]
324
00:11:19,678 --> 00:11:24,547
?
325
00:11:24,616 --> 00:11:28,151
? Are teenage dreams so hard to beat? ?
326
00:11:28,220 --> 00:11:30,320
? Every time she walks down the street ?
327
00:11:30,388 --> 00:11:31,988
Did you put your telescope here?
328
00:11:32,057 --> 00:11:33,289
Yeah, JJ thought it'd be cool.
329
00:11:35,026 --> 00:11:38,294
? Wish she was mine, she looks so good ?
330
00:11:38,363 --> 00:11:41,130
? I wanna hold her,
wanna hold her tight ?
331
00:11:41,199 --> 00:11:42,599
Okay, big finish.
332
00:11:42,667 --> 00:11:44,634
? ...right through the night ?
333
00:11:44,703 --> 00:11:46,703
? Oh, yeah ?
334
00:11:46,771 --> 00:11:49,639
Yeah. That was a bad one to end on.
335
00:11:50,909 --> 00:11:51,975
Oh!
336
00:11:52,043 --> 00:11:55,845
So, this is the notorious elevator, eh?
337
00:11:55,914 --> 00:11:57,347
- Let's ride it.
- Why?
338
00:11:57,415 --> 00:11:59,282
So we can make fun of it.
339
00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:01,017
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS, BOTH LAUGH]
340
00:12:02,921 --> 00:12:04,320
[ELEVATOR WHIRRING]
341
00:12:04,389 --> 00:12:05,455
Dumb elevator.
342
00:12:05,523 --> 00:12:07,590
Still smell like
some guy's cologne much?
343
00:12:07,659 --> 00:12:08,992
[CHUCKLES]
344
00:12:09,060 --> 00:12:10,360
- [ALARM RINGS, WHIRRING STOPS]
- Right.
345
00:12:10,428 --> 00:12:12,061
You like dramatic reveals? Here's one.
346
00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:13,830
My kid is one of the two children...
347
00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:16,165
there's four, actually...
that uses this elevator.
348
00:12:16,234 --> 00:12:17,467
Wait. What?!
349
00:12:17,535 --> 00:12:20,169
So, is this some kind of
undercover sting?
350
00:12:20,238 --> 00:12:21,337
[SIGHS DEEPLY]
351
00:12:21,406 --> 00:12:23,122
- [WHIRRING RESUMES]
- Don't be ridiculous!
352
00:12:23,185 --> 00:12:24,247
- [ALARM RINGS, WHIRRING STOPS]
- Hey!
353
00:12:24,302 --> 00:12:25,508
Listen! Here's what's gonna happen.
354
00:12:25,577 --> 00:12:26,643
You're gonna leave this elevator,
355
00:12:26,711 --> 00:12:28,177
which I'd like to be
refurbished for my son,
356
00:12:28,246 --> 00:12:29,379
and you're going to put a stop
357
00:12:29,447 --> 00:12:30,780
to whatever plan you've concocted.
358
00:12:30,849 --> 00:12:33,483
And if you don't, I'm gonna use
all the energy I've devoted
359
00:12:33,551 --> 00:12:36,219
to making this school a haven for my kid
360
00:12:36,288 --> 00:12:38,087
into making it a hell for you.
361
00:12:38,156 --> 00:12:39,923
- Ohh!
- Now you're free to leave.
362
00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:46,462
What is happening?!
363
00:12:46,531 --> 00:12:48,598
I told you
they needed to fix this thing!
364
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:50,233
Alright, where to next?
365
00:12:50,302 --> 00:12:52,035
Isn't it time to get back to school?
366
00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:54,370
You're really not acting
like the Ray I know.
367
00:12:54,439 --> 00:12:56,472
But the Ray you know
always fought with you guys.
368
00:12:56,541 --> 00:12:57,607
We're having fun together.
369
00:12:57,676 --> 00:13:00,143
In fact, forget this "Ray" business.
370
00:13:00,211 --> 00:13:01,904
Call me Blaze.
371
00:13:02,347 --> 00:13:03,413
[CHUCKLING] Ohh.
372
00:13:03,481 --> 00:13:05,214
Blaze just figured out his next move.
373
00:13:06,418 --> 00:13:07,450
What are you doing?
374
00:13:07,519 --> 00:13:09,686
Our soda-throwing friend.
375
00:13:09,754 --> 00:13:11,254
Are you gonna mess with his car?
376
00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:13,222
Ray, no, let's go back to the school.
377
00:13:13,291 --> 00:13:14,490
I'm Blaze.
378
00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:16,826
Ray, I never appreciated it before,
379
00:13:16,895 --> 00:13:18,828
but you do serve a purpose.
380
00:13:18,897 --> 00:13:20,296
We need a wet blanket.
381
00:13:20,365 --> 00:13:23,066
Without you, we're
a runaway truck without brakes.
382
00:13:23,134 --> 00:13:24,767
The trio demands a weenie.
383
00:13:24,836 --> 00:13:26,035
I did my time.
384
00:13:26,104 --> 00:13:27,904
Fine! I'll do it!
385
00:13:27,973 --> 00:13:29,405
JJ obviously never will.
386
00:13:29,474 --> 00:13:31,507
He just wants to see the world burn.
387
00:13:31,576 --> 00:13:35,945
There's a new killjoy in town,
and I say the fun stops now.
388
00:13:36,014 --> 00:13:38,514
I spent a lot of time
saying things just like that.
389
00:13:38,583 --> 00:13:40,450
Better on this side, weenie.
390
00:13:40,518 --> 00:13:41,985
[SIGHS]
391
00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:47,127
My husband will be here
to rescue me momentarily.
392
00:13:47,175 --> 00:13:49,108
Oh, so, my fate rests
in the hands of a man
393
00:13:49,177 --> 00:13:50,977
who would marry you? Great.
394
00:13:51,045 --> 00:13:52,478
Well, I wonder who'd marry you, too.
395
00:13:52,547 --> 00:13:54,616
Where did you meet?
At an "I Hate Wheelchairs" rally?
396
00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:56,145
We met through mutual friends!
397
00:13:56,213 --> 00:13:57,446
That is very boring!
398
00:13:59,416 --> 00:14:00,449
I don't hate your son.
399
00:14:00,517 --> 00:14:01,683
You got a funny way of showing it.
400
00:14:01,752 --> 00:14:03,952
I don't want to take
anything away from anyone.
401
00:14:04,021 --> 00:14:06,922
I'm just trying to figure out
how to help my kid.
402
00:14:06,991 --> 00:14:08,924
Jake's not doing great, okay?
403
00:14:08,993 --> 00:14:10,459
He's really lonely.
404
00:14:10,527 --> 00:14:13,128
Fencing is the only thing
that made him happy.
405
00:14:13,197 --> 00:14:14,896
I'm just... I'm trying to figure out
406
00:14:14,965 --> 00:14:17,432
how to make my son happy.
407
00:14:17,501 --> 00:14:19,534
But it's hurting my kid in the process.
408
00:14:19,603 --> 00:14:21,903
And, I mean, I'll do anything
to protect him,
409
00:14:21,972 --> 00:14:24,940
even if it means taking
something away from your kid.
410
00:14:26,844 --> 00:14:28,977
Which is exactly what you're doing.
411
00:14:29,046 --> 00:14:30,278
Ohhhhh!
412
00:14:30,347 --> 00:14:32,414
Oh, I just realized something.
413
00:14:32,483 --> 00:14:35,150
Other people love
their children... like how I do.
414
00:14:35,219 --> 00:14:36,918
I do. Please let me see him again.
415
00:14:36,987 --> 00:14:38,887
I get it. I feel you.
416
00:14:38,956 --> 00:14:40,455
I may even like you again.
417
00:14:40,524 --> 00:14:42,057
I definitely like your jumpsuit.
418
00:14:42,126 --> 00:14:43,291
Well, I really liked you
419
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,460
before this whole kidnapping thing.
420
00:14:45,529 --> 00:14:47,329
And even then, it was a great ambush.
421
00:14:47,398 --> 00:14:49,164
So you like the irony of me
trapping you in the elevator.
422
00:14:49,233 --> 00:14:51,466
Oh, I got it right away. [CHUCKLES]
423
00:14:51,535 --> 00:14:52,701
Just out of curiosity,
424
00:14:52,770 --> 00:14:55,003
what was your plan
for saving the fencing team?
425
00:14:55,072 --> 00:14:57,105
Oh, I was going to give Dr. Miller
426
00:14:57,174 --> 00:14:59,508
a very strongly worded letter.
427
00:14:59,576 --> 00:15:01,143
A letter?! Pbht!
428
00:15:01,211 --> 00:15:04,112
Oh, I'm sorry. I don't think
you've read my letters.
429
00:15:04,181 --> 00:15:06,248
How much free soup
has Campbell's sent you?
430
00:15:06,316 --> 00:15:07,649
[GRUNTS]
431
00:15:07,718 --> 00:15:09,985
Hey, honey. I'm here
to get you out of there.
432
00:15:10,054 --> 00:15:11,553
Got a ladder, but I'm just not sure
433
00:15:11,622 --> 00:15:12,988
how safe it would be for me to...
434
00:15:13,057 --> 00:15:14,489
Oh, Jimmy, take your bloody shoes off!
435
00:15:14,514 --> 00:15:15,457
Copy.
436
00:15:16,493 --> 00:15:18,860
This isn't you. Don't do this.
437
00:15:18,929 --> 00:15:20,662
Dylan, don't fight it.
438
00:15:20,731 --> 00:15:22,030
We don't need a stick in the mud.
439
00:15:22,099 --> 00:15:23,765
You could have a cool nickname like me.
440
00:15:23,834 --> 00:15:24,766
Maybe Siren.
441
00:15:26,470 --> 00:15:29,037
"I'm Girth Squeezel."
442
00:15:29,106 --> 00:15:31,073
Girth Squeezel?
443
00:15:31,141 --> 00:15:32,707
Okay, enough talk.
444
00:15:32,776 --> 00:15:34,476
I've got a car to egg.
445
00:15:34,545 --> 00:15:35,964
[GRUNTS]
446
00:15:36,346 --> 00:15:37,379
[GRUNTS]
447
00:15:37,448 --> 00:15:38,880
Ehh! Ehh!
448
00:15:38,949 --> 00:15:40,749
Gah!
449
00:15:40,818 --> 00:15:42,150
"Wow."
450
00:15:42,219 --> 00:15:45,287
B-L... "Blaze throws a lot like Ray."
451
00:15:45,355 --> 00:15:46,421
[GRUNTS]
452
00:15:47,691 --> 00:15:49,658
Alright, last one.
453
00:15:49,683 --> 00:15:50,625
[SMOOCHES]
454
00:15:50,694 --> 00:15:51,626
[GRUNTS]
455
00:15:52,729 --> 00:15:54,029
[GASPS]
456
00:15:56,266 --> 00:15:57,966
Why did you guys let me do that?!
457
00:15:58,035 --> 00:15:59,267
I'm Ray!
458
00:15:59,336 --> 00:16:01,470
Alright, now,
in times like this, it's common
459
00:16:01,538 --> 00:16:04,473
to feel an overpowering
attraction to your rescuer.
460
00:16:04,541 --> 00:16:07,609
We'll sort out those emotions
once I get my shoes back on.
461
00:16:07,678 --> 00:16:09,377
What's up, hero?
462
00:16:09,446 --> 00:16:11,780
Hey... guys!
463
00:16:11,849 --> 00:16:13,281
Aren't you gonna come down, big guy?
464
00:16:13,350 --> 00:16:14,683
You know, I...
465
00:16:14,751 --> 00:16:17,786
Actually, I've got some
post-rescue inspection stuff
466
00:16:17,855 --> 00:16:19,321
to... you know, just want to...
467
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:21,597
[SIGHS]
468
00:16:21,658 --> 00:16:27,062
?
469
00:16:27,131 --> 00:16:28,196
I don't understand.
470
00:16:28,265 --> 00:16:30,198
Well, the rest of him
is there on the bench.
471
00:16:30,267 --> 00:16:32,667
But it doesn't matter
because he's a her...
472
00:16:32,736 --> 00:16:34,436
Ohhhhhhh.
473
00:16:34,505 --> 00:16:35,837
Forget tall, darling.
474
00:16:35,906 --> 00:16:38,006
What's important
is that you're the bigger man.
475
00:16:38,075 --> 00:16:39,608
I saw things up there!
476
00:16:39,676 --> 00:16:41,409
A lot of you are going bald!
477
00:16:42,379 --> 00:16:45,247
This is the most expensive thing I own.
478
00:16:45,315 --> 00:16:47,415
One telescope for one broken sign?
479
00:16:49,319 --> 00:16:50,886
You're lucky I don't call the police.
480
00:16:50,954 --> 00:16:52,787
If I see you around here again, I will.
481
00:16:52,856 --> 00:16:54,756
And they will find you, Blaze.
482
00:16:54,825 --> 00:16:56,458
They will find you.
483
00:16:58,662 --> 00:16:59,794
You were right.
484
00:16:59,863 --> 00:17:02,197
That was irresponsible of me,
and I'm back.
485
00:17:02,266 --> 00:17:04,266
But it was nice to be on the same side.
486
00:17:04,334 --> 00:17:05,967
You were responsible, Dylan.
487
00:17:06,036 --> 00:17:08,203
Maybe we can all be
responsible ones now.
488
00:17:08,272 --> 00:17:11,239
?
489
00:17:13,377 --> 00:17:15,076
Come on, weenie! Drive!
490
00:17:16,847 --> 00:17:21,283
This $50 Amazon gift card
is sold for $34... 95.
491
00:17:21,351 --> 00:17:25,053
Okay, DJ Kenneth thinks this
fundraiser's only going so-so.
492
00:17:25,122 --> 00:17:26,488
- That concludes...
- Uh, Kenneth!
493
00:17:26,557 --> 00:17:27,722
I got something else to auction.
494
00:17:27,791 --> 00:17:29,324
Well, is it lessons
on how to treat a deejay?
495
00:17:29,393 --> 00:17:30,625
'Cause they could use that!
496
00:17:30,694 --> 00:17:31,660
[CROWD GROANS]
497
00:17:31,728 --> 00:17:33,929
Um... [CLEARS THROAT]
498
00:17:33,997 --> 00:17:36,231
I always thought people with
families different from mine
499
00:17:36,300 --> 00:17:37,566
couldn't understand me,
500
00:17:37,634 --> 00:17:40,335
but after trapping this woman
in an elevator...
501
00:17:40,404 --> 00:17:41,937
- [CROWD GASPS]
- No, no, she's fine.
502
00:17:42,005 --> 00:17:43,238
I mean, Sarah, tell them you're fine.
503
00:17:43,307 --> 00:17:44,472
Well, my back hurts a little bit.
504
00:17:44,541 --> 00:17:45,473
She's fine.
505
00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:46,708
Anyway, I realized
506
00:17:46,777 --> 00:17:49,578
that you all have JJs
with wants and needs
507
00:17:49,646 --> 00:17:52,514
that are just as important
as my child's.
508
00:17:52,583 --> 00:17:55,150
I don't succeed
at getting my kid what he wants
509
00:17:55,219 --> 00:17:58,386
just because his stuff matters
more than yours.
510
00:17:58,455 --> 00:18:00,855
I get it 'cause I've got
a lot of fight in me
511
00:18:00,924 --> 00:18:02,324
and I've had to do much practice.
512
00:18:02,392 --> 00:18:03,758
So, anyway, that's what I'm offering...
513
00:18:03,827 --> 00:18:06,528
me fighting for anything you desire.
514
00:18:06,597 --> 00:18:07,796
100 bucks a pop.
515
00:18:07,864 --> 00:18:09,764
Proceeds go to
the Lafayette fencing team.
516
00:18:09,833 --> 00:18:11,366
- [CROWD REACTS EXCITEDLY]
- Any takers?
517
00:18:11,435 --> 00:18:12,467
- MAN: Over here!
- WOMAN: Yes! Here!
518
00:18:12,536 --> 00:18:14,703
[GASPS] Look at you all!
519
00:18:14,771 --> 00:18:16,671
Kenneth, this is some crowd!
520
00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:18,873
[DISCO MUSIC PLAYS]
521
00:18:18,942 --> 00:18:22,310
?
522
00:18:22,379 --> 00:18:25,413
Don't... D-Don't say anything.
Just... Just listen.
523
00:18:25,482 --> 00:18:26,715
I didn't come here tonight
524
00:18:26,783 --> 00:18:30,018
intending to deceive you
with magical shoes,
525
00:18:30,087 --> 00:18:32,988
but I put them on, and I liked
the confidence they gave me,
526
00:18:33,056 --> 00:18:36,958
and I liked the way
you looked at me in them.
527
00:18:37,027 --> 00:18:39,461
But it wasn't real. This is.
528
00:18:39,529 --> 00:18:41,696
I am a not-tall man.
529
00:18:41,765 --> 00:18:44,199
You know, it takes a lot of
nerve to do something like that.
530
00:18:46,169 --> 00:18:48,103
Even more to admit it.
531
00:18:48,171 --> 00:18:49,771
- You're not mad?
- Yeah.
532
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:52,374
Mad at how inspired I am
to admit my own insecurity.
533
00:18:53,910 --> 00:18:55,377
My name's Carl.
534
00:18:55,445 --> 00:18:57,512
And I always think
waiters are hitting on my wife.
535
00:18:58,649 --> 00:18:59,614
Uh...
536
00:18:59,683 --> 00:19:01,549
I dye my hair.
537
00:19:01,618 --> 00:19:04,853
I'm a natural brunet, but I-I hate it.
538
00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:06,254
I'm not in shape.
539
00:19:06,323 --> 00:19:07,322
No!
540
00:19:07,391 --> 00:19:09,524
I'm just wearing a man girdle. Look.
541
00:19:09,593 --> 00:19:10,825
[VELCRO RIPS]
542
00:19:10,894 --> 00:19:11,993
Whoa!
543
00:19:12,062 --> 00:19:13,495
Awesome!
544
00:19:13,563 --> 00:19:15,297
You changed lives today, Jimmy.
545
00:19:15,365 --> 00:19:16,798
Platform shoes or not...
546
00:19:19,136 --> 00:19:21,703
...you'll always be tall to me.
547
00:19:21,772 --> 00:19:23,438
And me.
548
00:19:23,507 --> 00:19:24,639
And me.
549
00:19:26,343 --> 00:19:29,978
This is the best, weirdest...
550
00:19:30,047 --> 00:19:32,547
first fundraiser I have ever been to.
551
00:19:32,616 --> 00:19:34,849
So, textbooks for the Spanish club,
552
00:19:34,918 --> 00:19:36,418
fencing's gonna be reinstated,
553
00:19:36,486 --> 00:19:39,154
and one of the parents
wants fewer water fountains,
554
00:19:39,222 --> 00:19:40,422
for some reason.
555
00:19:40,490 --> 00:19:41,956
This list is strange.
556
00:19:42,025 --> 00:19:43,325
Hey!
557
00:19:43,393 --> 00:19:44,959
I'm getting parents
everything they want!
558
00:19:45,028 --> 00:19:46,194
Look at you, giving back.
559
00:19:46,263 --> 00:19:47,962
Yeah, and I want to.
560
00:19:48,031 --> 00:19:50,131
Dr. Miller, I don't say this very often,
561
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,734
but thank you... for everything.
562
00:19:52,803 --> 00:19:55,136
We love being part of this community.
563
00:19:55,205 --> 00:19:56,838
We're home.
564
00:19:56,907 --> 00:19:58,073
What's wrong?
565
00:19:58,141 --> 00:20:00,208
Oh, now's not the time.
566
00:20:00,277 --> 00:20:02,010
But I've spoken with JJ's teachers.
567
00:20:02,053 --> 00:20:03,078
He's...
568
00:20:03,146 --> 00:20:05,280
not gonna graduate this year.
569
00:20:07,451 --> 00:20:08,917
[VOCALIZING]
570
00:20:08,985 --> 00:20:10,218
What up? [CHUCKLES]
571
00:20:12,104 --> 00:20:13,236
Too much of a good thing?
572
00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:19,625
Alright.
573
00:20:19,692 --> 00:20:21,926
So, Mom and Dad are gonna notice
that my telescope is gone,
574
00:20:21,996 --> 00:20:24,062
but it'll be fine,
because we're all pals now.
575
00:20:24,131 --> 00:20:25,397
We can back each other up.
576
00:20:25,466 --> 00:20:28,867
So, the story is, we saw
a poor, young schoolgirl.
577
00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:31,203
She told us her dream
was to be an astronomer, but...
578
00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,871
Sounds great, Ray.
579
00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:34,873
You guys aren't gonna
have my back, are you?
580
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,208
No.
581
00:20:36,277 --> 00:20:38,310
Alright, I guess it's back
to where we started...
582
00:20:38,379 --> 00:20:40,145
Dylan and JJ against the weenie.
583
00:20:40,214 --> 00:20:43,182
At least I still have the
20 bucks Mom and Dad gave us.
584
00:20:43,250 --> 00:20:46,451
"Give it to me,
or I'll tell them you..."
585
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:48,053
D-R... "drove."
586
00:20:48,122 --> 00:20:49,688
[SIGHS]
587
00:20:51,292 --> 00:20:52,791
Fun team while it lasted.
588
00:20:52,860 --> 00:20:55,060
Guess we'll always have the memories.
589
00:20:55,129 --> 00:20:57,664
Nah. Give me those, too.
590
00:20:57,714 --> 00:21:02,264
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