Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:02,159
Right. We're running a bit
late this morning, darling.
2
00:00:02,161 --> 00:00:04,243
Who's ready for a
game of "This or This"?
3
00:00:04,245 --> 00:00:05,344
This or this?
4
00:00:05,346 --> 00:00:06,407
This or this?
5
00:00:06,408 --> 00:00:07,674
This or this?
6
00:00:07,676 --> 00:00:09,576
Jeans, red shirt, blue sneakers.
7
00:00:09,578 --> 00:00:11,512
Dylan, what outfit
did I say he'd choose?
8
00:00:11,514 --> 00:00:13,547
Dylan: Jeans, red shirt, blue sneakers.
9
00:00:13,549 --> 00:00:14,715
Noice!
10
00:00:14,717 --> 00:00:16,484
Okay, kids. Breakfast is served.
11
00:00:16,503 --> 00:00:18,536
Delicious nutrition bars.
12
00:00:18,554 --> 00:00:22,022
"Specially formulated for the
needs of a pre-menstrual woman"?
13
00:00:22,024 --> 00:00:23,290
Eat it. Don't read it.
14
00:00:23,292 --> 00:00:25,132
I couldn't write my book
report because of my arm.
15
00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:27,194
That's not the arm
you use to write with.
16
00:00:27,196 --> 00:00:29,163
Can't sneak anything past you, Mom.
17
00:00:29,165 --> 00:00:31,165
"Tale of Two Cities." You loved it.
18
00:00:31,167 --> 00:00:32,366
Hey, that's mine.
19
00:00:32,368 --> 00:00:34,074
Far too brilliant to
use only once, darling.
20
00:00:34,075 --> 00:00:37,404
"I forgot my food-drive donation."
21
00:00:37,406 --> 00:00:38,806
Oh! Hold on.
22
00:00:38,808 --> 00:00:40,541
Was my lunch. All yours.
23
00:00:40,543 --> 00:00:42,276
Anything you need, Ray?
24
00:00:42,278 --> 00:00:44,245
Nothing, and this actually isn't bad.
25
00:00:44,246 --> 00:00:46,647
I'm feeling good about my
body and not at all moody.
26
00:00:46,649 --> 00:00:48,115
I'm on fire today.
27
00:00:48,117 --> 00:00:49,950
Gonna be on time for carpooling duty.
28
00:00:49,952 --> 00:00:51,485
I'm making every green light.
29
00:00:51,487 --> 00:00:53,120
- [Horn honks]
- That one was actually red.
30
00:00:53,122 --> 00:00:54,728
Well, before it was
red, it was green, Ray.
31
00:00:54,729 --> 00:00:56,257
Attitude is everything.
32
00:00:56,259 --> 00:00:57,691
Keep it moving. Come on.
33
00:00:57,693 --> 00:00:59,199
Keep it moving, please. Keep it moving.
34
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:00,833
All the way up to the orange
cones. All right, come on.
35
00:01:00,835 --> 00:01:02,930
I thought people hated this job.
36
00:01:02,932 --> 00:01:05,800
I mean, volunteer hours
to boss around strangers.
37
00:01:05,801 --> 00:01:07,671
I don't know how this
day could get any better.
38
00:01:07,673 --> 00:01:08,781
I was gonna offer you this,
39
00:01:08,806 --> 00:01:10,142
but doesn't seem like you need it.
40
00:01:10,144 --> 00:01:11,705
Oh, now I get to be loud?
41
00:01:11,707 --> 00:01:13,707
- [Feedback]
- I love my life!
42
00:01:13,709 --> 00:01:15,409
Yeah, don't need it.
43
00:01:15,411 --> 00:01:19,408
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
44
00:01:19,432 --> 00:01:21,181
All right, darling.
Go on, hit the target.
45
00:01:21,183 --> 00:01:23,617
And...
46
00:01:23,619 --> 00:01:25,186
- Ka-pow!
- [Both laugh]
47
00:01:25,187 --> 00:01:27,421
Well, Mr. Bruce Lee, what
have you done with my son?
48
00:01:27,423 --> 00:01:29,957
Great stretching, Mom.
You make him so limber.
49
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:31,792
Weirdest sucking up ever.
50
00:01:31,794 --> 00:01:33,594
All right, Ray, no need to be snippy
51
00:01:33,596 --> 00:01:36,096
just because your science
project isn't coming together.
52
00:01:36,098 --> 00:01:37,832
This is how it's supposed to look.
53
00:01:37,833 --> 00:01:39,004
You don't even know what they...
54
00:01:39,006 --> 00:01:42,102
Phobos and Deimos... Moons of Mars.
55
00:01:42,104 --> 00:01:43,237
Jimmy: I got him, honey.
56
00:01:43,239 --> 00:01:45,873
Mom, insulted but impressed.
57
00:01:45,875 --> 00:01:47,113
You are in the zone.
58
00:01:47,114 --> 00:01:49,743
Yeah, you know what?
Nothing can stop me today.
59
00:01:49,745 --> 00:01:50,811
[Sneezes]
60
00:01:50,813 --> 00:01:52,379
Sickness! No!
61
00:01:52,381 --> 00:01:54,215
We got a sneezer. This is not a drill!
62
00:01:54,216 --> 00:01:55,382
What the hell's going on?
63
00:01:55,384 --> 00:01:57,952
You sneezed into your
hands like a barbarian.
64
00:01:57,953 --> 00:01:59,219
Am I not supposed to?
65
00:01:59,221 --> 00:02:00,554
- [Sneezes]
- Jimmy: Kenneth!
66
00:02:00,556 --> 00:02:02,089
Oh, are you trying to kill us?!
67
00:02:02,091 --> 00:02:04,058
You just told me not
to sneeze into my hands.
68
00:02:04,059 --> 00:02:05,192
Sneeze into your elbow.
69
00:02:05,194 --> 00:02:06,433
I mean, not the elbow...
That's the outside...
70
00:02:06,434 --> 00:02:09,630
But the inside elbow, the...
Where the crease-thing is.
71
00:02:09,632 --> 00:02:11,332
The... Oh, my God. What's it called?
72
00:02:11,333 --> 00:02:13,066
Thanks, Kenneth, the
woman was on a roll,
73
00:02:13,068 --> 00:02:15,802
and now she can't even remember
the name for a chelidon.
74
00:02:15,804 --> 00:02:17,871
A sniffle can really take
out a family like ours.
75
00:02:17,873 --> 00:02:19,640
JJ takes a little bit longer to recover.
76
00:02:19,642 --> 00:02:21,375
We like to be cautious.
77
00:02:21,377 --> 00:02:23,143
- Please take your leave.
- What?
78
00:02:23,145 --> 00:02:25,746
Come back when you have been
symptom-free for 24 hours.
79
00:02:25,748 --> 00:02:27,081
Maya, are you serious?
80
00:02:27,082 --> 00:02:28,548
Ugh! Oh!
81
00:02:28,550 --> 00:02:29,917
I know that was a bit harsh.
82
00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:31,485
If he survives, he'll understand.
83
00:02:31,487 --> 00:02:33,654
So, someone's gonna need
to read JJ's board today.
84
00:02:33,656 --> 00:02:34,889
- Any takers?
- Ray: I'll do it.
85
00:02:34,890 --> 00:02:36,495
Great chance for me to
check out the classes
86
00:02:36,497 --> 00:02:38,091
I'll be taking next year.
87
00:02:38,093 --> 00:02:39,092
I'll do it.
88
00:02:39,094 --> 00:02:40,627
"Dylan.
89
00:02:40,629 --> 00:02:43,130
I like her reason better."
90
00:02:43,132 --> 00:02:47,501
91
00:02:47,503 --> 00:02:50,070
Geez, upperclassmen sure do like
92
00:02:50,072 --> 00:02:52,439
to give each other back massages.
93
00:02:52,441 --> 00:02:53,741
Are they that sore?
94
00:02:53,742 --> 00:02:56,879
Hey, sweetie, if you
got a sprain up there,
95
00:02:56,904 --> 00:02:58,812
that guy's doing a lot
more harm than good.
96
00:02:58,814 --> 00:03:00,921
Let me give you the number
to my sports medicine guy.
97
00:03:00,922 --> 00:03:02,182
He's the best.
98
00:03:02,184 --> 00:03:03,984
Yeah?
99
00:03:03,986 --> 00:03:06,287
Hey, I should probably sharpen my pencil
100
00:03:06,288 --> 00:03:08,689
in case anyone tries to
give me a back rub.
101
00:03:08,691 --> 00:03:10,309
I'll be right back.
102
00:03:12,779 --> 00:03:14,995
- Hey, get in line, los...
- Sorry.
103
00:03:14,997 --> 00:03:16,997
104
00:03:16,999 --> 00:03:18,966
Go ahead.
105
00:03:18,968 --> 00:03:20,000
Wait. Are you new?
106
00:03:20,002 --> 00:03:21,986
No.
107
00:03:21,987 --> 00:03:23,554
I'm here with JJ.
108
00:03:24,490 --> 00:03:26,073
As a sibling! I'm single.
109
00:03:26,075 --> 00:03:28,475
[Chuckles] Hi, single. I'm Chase.
110
00:03:28,477 --> 00:03:31,830
Oh, my God. You are insanely funny.
111
00:03:32,899 --> 00:03:34,699
I got to go. Bye.
112
00:03:37,270 --> 00:03:38,569
[Sighs]
113
00:03:39,973 --> 00:03:42,689
"You seem weird."
114
00:03:42,691 --> 00:03:45,209
What? No. Nothing's changed.
115
00:03:48,047 --> 00:03:49,747
Forever.
116
00:03:54,887 --> 00:03:58,271
Right, does everyone got
their backpacks, their lunches?
117
00:03:58,273 --> 00:03:59,539
[Sneezes]
118
00:03:59,541 --> 00:04:01,174
Uh-oh. Germ alert.
119
00:04:01,176 --> 00:04:02,576
Uh-oh. Nerd alert.
120
00:04:02,578 --> 00:04:04,244
I'm fine.
121
00:04:04,246 --> 00:04:06,113
[Maya groaning]
122
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:09,049
Who moved this bloody chair so high?
123
00:04:09,051 --> 00:04:11,518
[Breathes heavily, groans]
124
00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:12,673
[Door closes]
125
00:04:12,698 --> 00:04:14,087
[Horn honks]
126
00:04:14,089 --> 00:04:16,540
Oh, relax! I'm just waiting
for the light to change.
127
00:04:16,542 --> 00:04:19,293
[Shivering] Ohh, I'm so cold.
128
00:04:19,294 --> 00:04:22,496
I just... I got to go
back and get my parka.
129
00:04:22,498 --> 00:04:24,098
Up the stairs.
130
00:04:24,099 --> 00:04:28,168
Oh, so nice and warm
inside this dead bear.
131
00:04:28,170 --> 00:04:30,504
Oh!
132
00:04:30,506 --> 00:04:32,006
M-Mom?
133
00:04:32,007 --> 00:04:33,907
Oh! I'm here!
134
00:04:33,909 --> 00:04:36,577
I'm the only one left.
135
00:04:36,578 --> 00:04:41,081
You have to take over.
You will be the "me" today.
136
00:04:41,083 --> 00:04:42,383
Look. I made you a list.
137
00:04:42,384 --> 00:04:45,252
[Cellphone rings]
138
00:04:45,254 --> 00:04:47,254
Kenneth: Mrs. DiMeo, great news.
139
00:04:47,256 --> 00:04:48,455
I'm fit as a fiddle,
140
00:04:48,457 --> 00:04:49,823
and I'll be back at work tomorrow.
141
00:04:49,825 --> 00:04:53,260
You did this to me! [Coughs]
142
00:04:53,262 --> 00:04:55,129
This will not be forgiven soon.
143
00:04:55,130 --> 00:04:56,138
[Beeps]
144
00:04:56,163 --> 00:04:58,331
You sure you trust me with all this?
145
00:04:58,333 --> 00:05:01,068
I have all the faith in
the world in you, Jimmy.
146
00:05:01,070 --> 00:05:03,837
There's no one I trust
more to take over for me.
147
00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:05,806
Carpool line duty,
148
00:05:05,808 --> 00:05:07,508
brownies for Dylan's bake sale.
149
00:05:07,509 --> 00:05:09,960
Remind Dad about bills?
150
00:05:11,855 --> 00:05:14,381
Yeah, I asked Ray first. He said no.
151
00:05:14,383 --> 00:05:16,561
That's fair. Yeah.
152
00:05:17,467 --> 00:05:18,715
Can you watch the bumps?
153
00:05:18,740 --> 00:05:21,993
I'm trying to design my
project perfectly to scale.
154
00:05:22,018 --> 00:05:23,946
Dad, can you turn on the radio?
155
00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:25,982
Dylan, stop. Let the man concentrate.
156
00:05:25,984 --> 00:05:27,183
He's out of his depth.
157
00:05:27,185 --> 00:05:30,686
It's going to be okay.
How hard can this be?
158
00:05:30,688 --> 00:05:32,955
"I'm hungry."
159
00:05:32,957 --> 00:05:33,990
And the food Mom gets you
160
00:05:33,992 --> 00:05:35,552
is usually pretty nutritious, right?
161
00:05:35,554 --> 00:05:38,321
162
00:05:38,323 --> 00:05:40,724
When you walk the streets,
you will have no cares
163
00:05:40,726 --> 00:05:42,642
If you walk the lines
and not the squares
164
00:05:42,644 --> 00:05:45,228
This is better. Dad's better.
165
00:05:45,230 --> 00:05:46,630
Watch the donut, not the hole
166
00:05:46,632 --> 00:05:48,465
Pull forward to the orange cone.
167
00:05:48,467 --> 00:05:51,501
[Horns honking]
168
00:05:51,503 --> 00:05:54,771
No, no, no, no. Parents, phones down!
169
00:05:54,773 --> 00:05:56,473
Children, look at your parents.
170
00:05:56,475 --> 00:05:59,442
They're not always going to be there.
171
00:05:59,444 --> 00:06:00,628
Think about that.
172
00:06:03,299 --> 00:06:05,048
I didn't know it could be like this.
173
00:06:05,050 --> 00:06:07,684
This is the most Zen
drop-off I've ever seen.
174
00:06:07,686 --> 00:06:08,885
What's your secret?
175
00:06:08,887 --> 00:06:11,454
I don't really care if anyone's late.
176
00:06:11,456 --> 00:06:12,856
You tell your wife
177
00:06:12,858 --> 00:06:15,025
to take all the time
she needs to recover.
178
00:06:15,027 --> 00:06:17,561
Oh, I'm not gonna do that.
179
00:06:17,563 --> 00:06:19,129
- [Horn honks]
- We love you, Jimmy.
180
00:06:19,131 --> 00:06:22,249
Oh, love you, too,
mom whose name I know.
181
00:06:23,886 --> 00:06:25,001
Mrs. DiMeo?
182
00:06:25,003 --> 00:06:26,703
Maya: I'm in here.
183
00:06:26,705 --> 00:06:27,971
May I come in?
184
00:06:27,973 --> 00:06:30,073
Well, you can, but...
185
00:06:30,075 --> 00:06:31,474
Oh! Sick room.
186
00:06:31,476 --> 00:06:34,010
You've broken the seal and
released the pestilence.
187
00:06:34,012 --> 00:06:35,845
Yeah, this science feels sound.
188
00:06:35,847 --> 00:06:38,648
- [Muzak plays]
- Listen, Maya, I feel just awful
189
00:06:38,650 --> 00:06:40,317
about bringing the sick into your house.
190
00:06:40,319 --> 00:06:42,752
Any DiMeo that comes down with
it, I'll take care of them.
191
00:06:42,754 --> 00:06:44,054
Now, what are you doing?
192
00:06:44,056 --> 00:06:45,488
Oh, just kids' appointments,
193
00:06:45,490 --> 00:06:49,025
preparing JJ's I.E.P., waiting for...
194
00:06:49,027 --> 00:06:51,127
for...
195
00:06:51,129 --> 00:06:52,495
I have no idea.
196
00:06:52,497 --> 00:06:55,265
Am I just listening to
music? 'Cause it's terrible.
197
00:06:55,267 --> 00:06:57,234
[Chuckles] You should relax.
198
00:06:57,236 --> 00:06:59,202
- [Music stops]
- I can't waste a day.
199
00:06:59,204 --> 00:07:02,305
Wow. I just realized who you are.
200
00:07:02,307 --> 00:07:05,208
Is it Maya? I think it's Maya.
201
00:07:05,210 --> 00:07:06,713
My aunt.
202
00:07:06,738 --> 00:07:09,246
She worked her butt off in
her little beauty parlor.
203
00:07:09,248 --> 00:07:11,715
I loved hanging out
there, helping her out.
204
00:07:11,717 --> 00:07:13,445
Picked up a thing or two.
205
00:07:13,470 --> 00:07:15,785
Here. Let me see your hand.
206
00:07:15,787 --> 00:07:18,872
Wow, did you realize
that you have the nails
207
00:07:18,874 --> 00:07:21,358
of a dockworker who
works nights at a quarry?
208
00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:24,561
Hey! Well, w-welcome to motherhood.
209
00:07:24,563 --> 00:07:27,030
What do you propose I do
about it, you oafish...
210
00:07:27,032 --> 00:07:28,231
Ahh.
211
00:07:28,233 --> 00:07:30,066
Keep doing that.
212
00:07:30,068 --> 00:07:31,901
Ahh.
213
00:07:31,903 --> 00:07:32,836
Still got it.
214
00:07:32,838 --> 00:07:35,905
[Laughs, snorting]
215
00:07:35,907 --> 00:07:39,109
You are so right, Chase.
I c... It's so funny.
216
00:07:39,111 --> 00:07:40,610
Got to go, guys. Bye.
217
00:07:40,612 --> 00:07:42,112
Hey.
218
00:07:42,114 --> 00:07:45,866
"Stop F-L... flirting"?
219
00:07:46,973 --> 00:07:48,306
With Chase?
220
00:07:48,771 --> 00:07:50,820
What? No, JJ. We're just friends.
221
00:07:50,822 --> 00:07:52,856
Get your mind out of the gutter.
222
00:07:52,858 --> 00:07:55,325
Not everything's about "S."
223
00:07:55,327 --> 00:07:56,926
[Sighs]
224
00:07:56,928 --> 00:07:58,061
[School bell rings]
225
00:07:58,063 --> 00:08:01,464
226
00:08:01,466 --> 00:08:02,383
Hey.
227
00:08:04,086 --> 00:08:06,569
"Did you tie-dye your face?"
228
00:08:06,571 --> 00:08:08,989
[Scoffs] A lady never
reveals her secrets.
229
00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:12,876
"You're fired"?
230
00:08:12,878 --> 00:08:14,046
What? Why?
231
00:08:14,897 --> 00:08:17,364
"You're E-M-B... Embarrassing me"?
232
00:08:18,267 --> 00:08:19,449
No, you can't do that.
233
00:08:19,451 --> 00:08:21,168
Who's gonna be your
voice in Chase class...
234
00:08:22,286 --> 00:08:23,618
I mean, all your classes?
235
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:25,889
"Eyelash."
236
00:08:25,891 --> 00:08:27,741
What?
237
00:08:35,384 --> 00:08:37,267
So, Tanya shows up and, of course,
238
00:08:37,269 --> 00:08:39,936
- she's wearing some brand-new outfit.
- Mm-hmm.
239
00:08:39,938 --> 00:08:40,970
And Connie...
240
00:08:40,972 --> 00:08:42,505
Connie who sent the original text?
241
00:08:42,507 --> 00:08:43,807
- Yeah. That Connie.
- Mm.
242
00:08:43,809 --> 00:08:47,444
She says, "Well, I'm glad
at least somebody
243
00:08:47,446 --> 00:08:49,079
decided to dress up for this."
244
00:08:49,081 --> 00:08:50,130
She did not!
245
00:08:51,133 --> 00:08:52,415
So, what do you think?
246
00:08:52,417 --> 00:08:54,790
Wow, that is the first time
I've wanted to show you all five,
247
00:08:54,792 --> 00:08:55,852
not just the middle one.
248
00:08:55,854 --> 00:08:56,886
Oh, nice.
249
00:08:56,888 --> 00:08:58,521
Unh-unh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
250
00:08:58,523 --> 00:09:01,057
Sit back down. We are
just getting started.
251
00:09:01,059 --> 00:09:03,593
Now, when you look in a People magazine,
252
00:09:03,595 --> 00:09:05,779
whose hair do you just... want?
253
00:09:05,781 --> 00:09:09,383
Oh, Kenneth, I feel so guilty
spending my sick day doing this.
254
00:09:10,286 --> 00:09:11,501
And Beyonc?.
255
00:09:11,503 --> 00:09:13,370
Oh, well, you are guilty,
256
00:09:13,372 --> 00:09:16,606
and I sentence you to
a fantastic haircut.
257
00:09:16,608 --> 00:09:17,941
Those are my meat scissors.
258
00:09:17,943 --> 00:09:19,379
You're gonna want to give them a wash.
259
00:09:19,403 --> 00:09:20,648
Yeah.
260
00:09:21,163 --> 00:09:24,547
"Those don't look like moons."
261
00:09:24,549 --> 00:09:27,250
I'm sorry. I didn't know
you were a scientist.
262
00:09:27,252 --> 00:09:29,185
Oh, and, for your information,
263
00:09:29,187 --> 00:09:31,805
these are perfect re-creations.
264
00:09:33,029 --> 00:09:34,391
I mean, they're getting there.
265
00:09:34,393 --> 00:09:36,826
Ray, I just wanted to say,
266
00:09:36,828 --> 00:09:38,100
"Thank you for not being embarrassed
267
00:09:38,102 --> 00:09:40,848
with my recent blossoming
into womanhood."
268
00:09:43,085 --> 00:09:45,502
My gut says you're using me as a pawn,
269
00:09:45,504 --> 00:09:47,020
but my heart doesn't care.
270
00:09:47,823 --> 00:09:50,273
Okay, your mom's still sick as a dog,
271
00:09:50,275 --> 00:09:51,875
so she sent me to the well room.
272
00:09:51,877 --> 00:09:54,010
Anybody want to give
up a bed for their dad?
273
00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:55,145
Didn't think so.
274
00:09:55,147 --> 00:09:57,614
Oh, what are we talking about?
275
00:09:57,616 --> 00:10:00,216
How JJ can't deal with
my blossoming womanhood.
276
00:10:00,218 --> 00:10:00,984
Pass.
277
00:10:00,986 --> 00:10:01,814
So, what did Mom say
278
00:10:01,839 --> 00:10:03,269
when you told her how
great you did today?
279
00:10:03,293 --> 00:10:05,255
No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
280
00:10:05,257 --> 00:10:06,656
We're not telling Mom about that.
281
00:10:06,658 --> 00:10:08,324
Your mom takes a great deal of pride
282
00:10:08,326 --> 00:10:09,893
in what she does for this family
283
00:10:09,895 --> 00:10:12,862
and how hard it is... I mean, for her.
284
00:10:12,864 --> 00:10:14,264
And we're gonna let her have that.
285
00:10:14,266 --> 00:10:15,632
Vow of silence. Capiche?
286
00:10:15,634 --> 00:10:18,902
He's so cocky, he's
embracing his Italian-ness.
287
00:10:18,904 --> 00:10:20,954
Good night, guys.
288
00:10:21,991 --> 00:10:23,907
- [Sneezes]
- Who sneezed?
289
00:10:23,909 --> 00:10:24,707
It's over, Ray.
290
00:10:24,709 --> 00:10:26,342
No, not the sick room.
291
00:10:26,344 --> 00:10:27,644
I'm... I'm one of you.
292
00:10:27,646 --> 00:10:28,812
I'm a "well."
293
00:10:28,814 --> 00:10:31,114
- One sneeze I'll give you.
- Ah...
294
00:10:31,116 --> 00:10:33,483
But it sounds like you
got another one coming on.
295
00:10:33,485 --> 00:10:35,008
Ah...
296
00:10:35,033 --> 00:10:35,952
[Sneezes]
297
00:10:35,954 --> 00:10:37,620
Into your chelidon, Ray.
298
00:10:37,622 --> 00:10:39,689
Why does your hair look so fabulous?
299
00:10:39,691 --> 00:10:42,876
300
00:10:45,444 --> 00:10:48,818
Good morning, family.
I am returned to health.
301
00:10:48,843 --> 00:10:51,138
I had the most
restorative night's sleep,
302
00:10:51,140 --> 00:10:53,507
thanks, no doubt, to
my dopamine receptors
303
00:10:53,509 --> 00:10:57,444
detecting the eternal bond
between mother and baby.
304
00:10:57,446 --> 00:11:00,798
Thanks for filling in
for me. How'd it go?
305
00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:02,683
Bad! Bad, bad, bad.
306
00:11:02,685 --> 00:11:04,285
Was it hard?
307
00:11:04,287 --> 00:11:05,553
I don't know how you do it.
308
00:11:05,555 --> 00:11:06,659
And now I'm gonna go to my job,
309
00:11:06,661 --> 00:11:08,989
which is going to feel like a spa day
310
00:11:08,991 --> 00:11:12,159
next to the hell that
you call a Tuesday.
311
00:11:12,161 --> 00:11:13,727
Thank you for your service.
312
00:11:13,729 --> 00:11:15,563
Mm. You're very welcome, darling.
313
00:11:15,565 --> 00:11:16,997
[Door opens, closes]
314
00:11:16,999 --> 00:11:18,566
He really struggled, didn't he?
315
00:11:18,568 --> 00:11:20,034
Yeah, he did.
316
00:11:20,036 --> 00:11:23,437
I mean, I give him a 6... out of 14,000.
317
00:11:23,439 --> 00:11:25,839
Oh, you poor darlings.
318
00:11:25,841 --> 00:11:27,759
Daddy had a hard time, did he?
319
00:11:31,565 --> 00:11:32,964
He's lying. What is this?
320
00:11:36,836 --> 00:11:39,920
Hey, guys. Welcome home, darling.
321
00:11:39,922 --> 00:11:41,889
Oh, it must be such a
relief to get to go to work
322
00:11:41,891 --> 00:11:44,358
and not have to deal with
all that awful "Mum duty."
323
00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:46,594
Oh! Such a relief.
324
00:11:46,596 --> 00:11:47,828
Yeah.
325
00:11:47,830 --> 00:11:51,465
Does a vow of silence
mean nothing to you?
326
00:11:51,467 --> 00:11:52,800
It wasn't me.
327
00:11:52,802 --> 00:11:54,335
- Relax. I know who it was.
- Huh.
328
00:11:54,337 --> 00:11:56,737
Yeah, that's really
convincing, blabbermouth.
329
00:11:56,739 --> 00:11:58,639
Don't blame blabbermouth.
This is on you.
330
00:11:58,641 --> 00:11:59,590
You're on a roll.
331
00:11:59,592 --> 00:12:00,713
Kids, can you give us a minute?
332
00:12:00,715 --> 00:12:01,881
Your mom and I need to have a talk.
333
00:12:01,883 --> 00:12:04,345
"You mean a fight."
334
00:12:04,347 --> 00:12:05,685
No, of course I don't mean a fight.
335
00:12:05,687 --> 00:12:07,352
See? That's what it
looks like when you lie.
336
00:12:07,376 --> 00:12:08,466
Just silly.
337
00:12:10,370 --> 00:12:12,653
Okay. Why would you
say that day was hard?
338
00:12:12,655 --> 00:12:15,356
You work hard. You take
pride in what you do.
339
00:12:15,358 --> 00:12:17,124
You deserve to feel important.
340
00:12:17,126 --> 00:12:21,128
Ah, "feel important," the
illusion of importance.
341
00:12:21,130 --> 00:12:22,997
- So now you're patronizing me.
- [Sighs]
342
00:12:22,999 --> 00:12:25,165
- Well, guess what... I
patronized you first! - How?
343
00:12:25,190 --> 00:12:26,227
I took it easy on you.
344
00:12:26,252 --> 00:12:29,036
That day you crushed, I
took all the hard stuff out.
345
00:12:29,038 --> 00:12:30,638
You crushed a baby day.
346
00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,439
I don't believe you. I
crushed a big-boy day.
347
00:12:32,441 --> 00:12:34,775
You know that little list I gave you?
348
00:12:34,777 --> 00:12:36,543
Say hello to the real deal.
349
00:12:36,545 --> 00:12:40,547
P.T., O.T., S.N.T. from S.S.I.?
350
00:12:40,549 --> 00:12:41,915
Okay, some of these sound made up.
351
00:12:41,917 --> 00:12:43,668
- S.N.T.?
- Special Needs Trust.
352
00:12:45,438 --> 00:12:48,105
I don't have time to
fact-check all this.
353
00:12:48,107 --> 00:12:49,857
Your turn... Jimmy's list, any time.
354
00:12:49,859 --> 00:12:52,559
Oh, I have letters of my own, lady.
355
00:12:52,561 --> 00:12:54,028
How about my J-O-B?
356
00:12:54,030 --> 00:12:55,062
Yeah, you work.
357
00:12:55,064 --> 00:12:57,498
Yeah. I am, uh, uh, the breadwinner.
358
00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:59,767
Also, I bring home the bacon.
359
00:12:59,769 --> 00:13:01,101
Both mean "job." Already covered.
360
00:13:01,103 --> 00:13:03,103
Oh! Oh! Remember that possum?
361
00:13:03,105 --> 00:13:04,772
Who chased the possum away?
362
00:13:04,774 --> 00:13:08,760
T.P.C.... The Possum
Chaser. Kids, come back.
363
00:13:09,829 --> 00:13:11,512
Help me out. I contribute here, right?
364
00:13:11,514 --> 00:13:13,514
Blabbermouth, seriously!
365
00:13:13,516 --> 00:13:14,565
Come on!
366
00:13:14,590 --> 00:13:16,304
How do I provide value to the family?
367
00:13:17,837 --> 00:13:19,687
You chased away that possum.
368
00:13:19,712 --> 00:13:21,257
I do more than that.
369
00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:24,809
I must. I'm tired all the time.
370
00:13:26,012 --> 00:13:27,995
Question, how do I help around...
371
00:13:27,997 --> 00:13:29,096
He insisted on this.
372
00:13:29,098 --> 00:13:30,397
Hey, I said I'd help you.
373
00:13:30,399 --> 00:13:32,666
I thought it would be
with your weird moons.
374
00:13:32,668 --> 00:13:34,396
You wanted the nails.
375
00:13:34,421 --> 00:13:36,070
How do I contribute to this family?
376
00:13:36,072 --> 00:13:39,073
You mentioned something
about shooing a possum?
377
00:13:39,075 --> 00:13:42,333
What help? The moons are finished.
378
00:13:45,331 --> 00:13:46,447
I've got no list.
379
00:13:46,449 --> 00:13:48,682
Oh, darling, I didn't mean it.
380
00:13:48,684 --> 00:13:49,683
You do a lot.
381
00:13:49,685 --> 00:13:51,785
So proud, so cocky.
382
00:13:51,787 --> 00:13:53,620
"Father of the Year" crushes a day
383
00:13:53,622 --> 00:13:56,423
that barely fits on a Post-it Note.
384
00:13:56,425 --> 00:13:59,919
This day, it started out so great.
385
00:14:01,848 --> 00:14:02,863
[Sneezes]
386
00:14:02,865 --> 00:14:03,936
You guys keep thinking about
387
00:14:03,938 --> 00:14:06,300
things I do for this family, okay?
388
00:14:06,302 --> 00:14:07,586
Thank you.
389
00:14:08,344 --> 00:14:11,413
[Chuckling] Oh, yeah! Soup's on!
390
00:14:11,438 --> 00:14:13,338
- Let me ask you a question.
- Yeah.
391
00:14:13,340 --> 00:14:17,250
When you look at me,
do you see dead weight?
392
00:14:18,028 --> 00:14:20,678
O-Or do you see... nothing,
393
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:25,850
just like a mist without
form or substance?
394
00:14:25,852 --> 00:14:29,120
You turn into a little
poet when you're sick.
395
00:14:29,122 --> 00:14:30,855
- [Door slams]
- Ray: Leave me alone, Mom!
396
00:14:30,857 --> 00:14:33,391
That seems like something
I should check on. Hmm?
397
00:14:33,393 --> 00:14:34,425
Go! Just go away!
398
00:14:34,427 --> 00:14:36,594
Mrs. DiMeo, uh... what's going on?
399
00:14:36,596 --> 00:14:38,630
Ray is having some
kind of a panic attack,
400
00:14:38,632 --> 00:14:40,431
and I'm just trying to calm him down.
401
00:14:40,433 --> 00:14:42,200
Ray, calm down!
402
00:14:42,202 --> 00:14:43,434
Calm down right now!
403
00:14:43,436 --> 00:14:45,403
I will not calm down!
404
00:14:45,405 --> 00:14:48,173
So, your project stinks.
How bad could it be?
405
00:14:48,175 --> 00:14:50,575
You want to see it? You want to see it?!
406
00:14:50,577 --> 00:14:52,210
Here!
407
00:14:52,212 --> 00:14:55,146
By the way, that thing
is worth 30% of my grade!
408
00:14:55,148 --> 00:14:57,677
God! You're gonna be living
in our basement forever,
409
00:14:57,702 --> 00:14:59,382
and we don't even have one!
410
00:14:59,407 --> 00:15:01,224
- [Banging on door]
- [Shouting indistinctly]
411
00:15:01,226 --> 00:15:03,721
[Children singing indistinctly on TV]
412
00:15:03,723 --> 00:15:05,390
[Clicking]
413
00:15:05,392 --> 00:15:08,726
[Sighs] Is the TV not working?
414
00:15:08,728 --> 00:15:10,895
Oh, that's right!
415
00:15:10,897 --> 00:15:12,747
Since you don't have the maturity
416
00:15:12,749 --> 00:15:16,267
to accept a relationship between
a man and blossoming woman,
417
00:15:16,269 --> 00:15:18,169
I reset the parental controls
418
00:15:18,171 --> 00:15:20,772
for people of your...
emotional maturity.
419
00:15:20,774 --> 00:15:22,941
The wheels on the bus
go round and round
420
00:15:22,943 --> 00:15:24,142
421
00:15:24,144 --> 00:15:26,010
Get away! Leave me alone!
422
00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:28,313
Dude, they're all going at each other...
423
00:15:28,315 --> 00:15:30,114
Dylan and JJ, Ray and Maya.
424
00:15:30,116 --> 00:15:32,589
Can we put up something
stronger than this plastic?
425
00:15:32,591 --> 00:15:34,586
I can't go out there and deal with them,
426
00:15:34,588 --> 00:15:36,588
so this is what I'm
gonna need you to do.
427
00:15:36,590 --> 00:15:38,356
First, take some ice cream
428
00:15:38,358 --> 00:15:41,476
and put it in a no-fat
frozen yogurt container.
429
00:15:41,501 --> 00:15:42,984
- What?
- Just do it.
430
00:15:44,848 --> 00:15:47,506
Mmm! I don't even miss the fat.
431
00:15:47,531 --> 00:15:48,514
[Chuckles]
432
00:15:49,253 --> 00:15:51,970
Now, make up any dumb, physical activity
433
00:15:51,972 --> 00:15:55,073
that it would be hard
to do, uh, say, 300 of.
434
00:15:55,075 --> 00:15:58,160
...113, 114, 115...
435
00:15:59,530 --> 00:16:03,381
Now, don't ask me why,
but play some light jazz.
436
00:16:03,383 --> 00:16:06,017
Not good jazz. Light jazz.
437
00:16:06,019 --> 00:16:08,386
[Light jazz plays]
438
00:16:08,388 --> 00:16:10,906
See, this is why I dig you, man.
439
00:16:11,942 --> 00:16:14,058
And bring Ray to me.
440
00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:15,031
Well, he locked himself in.
441
00:16:15,033 --> 00:16:16,628
Just tell him I said something.
442
00:16:16,630 --> 00:16:17,559
Said what?
443
00:16:17,584 --> 00:16:20,064
[Coughing] Anything factually inaccurate.
444
00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:21,883
I'm sorry... The sky is blue
445
00:16:21,885 --> 00:16:24,569
because it's reflecting
the color of the ocean?
446
00:16:24,571 --> 00:16:26,237
Uh, uh, yeah.
447
00:16:26,239 --> 00:16:28,306
Beca... Because of Newton's third law.
448
00:16:28,308 --> 00:16:29,340
What?!
449
00:16:29,342 --> 00:16:31,509
Anyway, now that I've got you here,
450
00:16:31,511 --> 00:16:33,411
what's going on with
your project, buddy?
451
00:16:33,413 --> 00:16:35,513
[Scoffs] Like an idiot,
I thought I could model
452
00:16:35,515 --> 00:16:36,914
Phobos and Deimos perfectly.
453
00:16:36,916 --> 00:16:39,183
Scientists haven't even
completely mapped them yet.
454
00:16:39,185 --> 00:16:41,286
I-I'm not a science guy,
455
00:16:41,288 --> 00:16:43,454
but maybe you could do a moon
456
00:16:43,456 --> 00:16:46,691
where you don't have to
m-make up all the stuff?
457
00:16:46,693 --> 00:16:48,993
What? Like Earth's moon? It's boring.
458
00:16:48,995 --> 00:16:50,728
It's actual name is "Moon."
459
00:16:50,730 --> 00:16:52,063
No, it's a classic.
460
00:16:52,065 --> 00:16:53,831
[Sniffles] Give the
people what they want.
461
00:16:53,833 --> 00:16:56,701
Don't give 'em B-sides,
give them "Born to Run."
462
00:16:56,703 --> 00:16:58,803
Good lord. Who fixed Ray?
463
00:16:58,805 --> 00:17:00,505
[Chuckles] Jimmy did.
464
00:17:00,507 --> 00:17:03,007
He also calmed down JJ, wore out Dylan,
465
00:17:03,009 --> 00:17:06,411
and you... didn't need
fixing 'cause you're great.
466
00:17:06,413 --> 00:17:08,479
Darling, that's what you do.
467
00:17:08,481 --> 00:17:10,014
You calm the madness.
468
00:17:10,016 --> 00:17:11,683
Huh.
469
00:17:11,685 --> 00:17:13,017
I suppose that's something.
470
00:17:13,019 --> 00:17:14,352
Something?
471
00:17:14,354 --> 00:17:16,954
You're the moon, and I'm the sun.
472
00:17:16,956 --> 00:17:20,425
Everything revolves around
me, and I make things grow.
473
00:17:20,427 --> 00:17:23,528
But you're the light
in the darkest hour.
474
00:17:23,530 --> 00:17:26,464
475
00:17:26,466 --> 00:17:29,079
And, really, the moon
476
00:17:29,104 --> 00:17:31,071
technically is the
center of the universe.
477
00:17:31,096 --> 00:17:34,348
Oh, my gosh! Dad, it's like
you're trying to be wrong.
478
00:17:35,059 --> 00:17:36,674
Everybody, get in here!
479
00:17:36,676 --> 00:17:38,309
JJ! Dylan!
480
00:17:38,311 --> 00:17:39,494
[Groans]
481
00:17:40,898 --> 00:17:43,181
All right, people. We
got a moon to build.
482
00:17:43,183 --> 00:17:46,384
And not the stupid Mars
moons, the American one.
483
00:17:46,386 --> 00:17:47,585
Using what?
484
00:17:47,587 --> 00:17:48,704
Ooh!
485
00:17:50,607 --> 00:17:52,090
Now, that's a moon!
486
00:17:52,092 --> 00:17:53,691
But it's due tomorrow morning.
487
00:17:53,693 --> 00:17:55,693
There's no way we can make this in time.
488
00:17:55,695 --> 00:17:57,829
- We'll work as a team.
- Yeah. No, your dad's right.
489
00:17:57,831 --> 00:17:59,323
We'll pull an all-nighter
and finish with time to spare.
490
00:17:59,347 --> 00:17:59,864
Who's in?
491
00:17:59,866 --> 00:18:01,165
- Yeah, I'm down.
- Sure.
492
00:18:01,167 --> 00:18:03,468
Look what you did, love.
493
00:18:03,470 --> 00:18:05,354
Smooth sailing now.
494
00:18:06,690 --> 00:18:09,374
Breach! Dylan, JJ, hold your breath!
495
00:18:09,376 --> 00:18:11,209
Everybody else, blow the germs back in!
496
00:18:11,211 --> 00:18:13,700
- [Ray and Maya blowing]
- Yeah, that's some solid science.
497
00:18:18,602 --> 00:18:20,118
Done.
498
00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:22,487
And we have to be in
school in 5 minutes.
499
00:18:22,489 --> 00:18:24,021
You said it wouldn't take all night.
500
00:18:24,023 --> 00:18:27,091
Ah, that's another thing I
do. I am never honest with you.
501
00:18:27,093 --> 00:18:29,827
All right, we've got our
moon. I'm not sick anymore.
502
00:18:29,829 --> 00:18:31,162
Let's go!
503
00:18:31,164 --> 00:18:35,217
What was he doing that
he fell asleep that way?
504
00:18:37,087 --> 00:18:38,469
Steady. It's slipping.
505
00:18:38,471 --> 00:18:40,605
[Tricycle bell dings]
506
00:18:40,607 --> 00:18:42,373
All right, it's not a race, Mitchell.
507
00:18:42,375 --> 00:18:43,641
508
00:18:43,643 --> 00:18:45,494
See?
509
00:18:47,431 --> 00:18:50,565
510
00:18:58,942 --> 00:19:00,191
Ray DiMeo?
511
00:19:00,193 --> 00:19:02,460
Is his sister that girl
who's obsessed with you?
512
00:19:02,462 --> 00:19:06,264
Wait. Is she a girl? For real?
513
00:19:06,266 --> 00:19:08,310
Well, I couldn't tell
under that clown makeup.
514
00:19:08,335 --> 00:19:10,214
[Both chuckle]
515
00:19:14,323 --> 00:19:16,005
We did it.
516
00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:17,396
He did it.
517
00:19:17,421 --> 00:19:18,904
Yeah, we're just proud.
518
00:19:21,131 --> 00:19:23,815
The program says Phobos and Deimos.
519
00:19:23,817 --> 00:19:25,233
This is such a disappointment.
520
00:19:27,104 --> 00:19:28,703
Disappointment!
521
00:19:32,609 --> 00:19:36,294
[Sighs]
522
00:19:36,296 --> 00:19:38,162
Okay, you were right.
523
00:19:38,164 --> 00:19:40,136
I shouldn't have bothered with Chase.
524
00:19:40,161 --> 00:19:42,712
'Cause it turns out, he's a jerk.
525
00:19:44,688 --> 00:19:45,887
You knew.
526
00:19:49,092 --> 00:19:50,708
Wait.
527
00:19:50,710 --> 00:19:53,811
You didn't fire me because
you were embarrassed of me.
528
00:19:53,813 --> 00:19:55,457
You were protecting me.
529
00:19:58,068 --> 00:20:00,084
"I don't have
530
00:20:00,086 --> 00:20:04,388
some basic big-brother moves.
531
00:20:04,390 --> 00:20:11,762
I can't beat anyone up for you.
532
00:20:11,764 --> 00:20:14,265
I can't drive you places,
533
00:20:14,267 --> 00:20:20,304
but I'll protect you my own way."
534
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,791
Your way's perfect.
535
00:20:24,161 --> 00:20:25,476
Wait.
536
00:20:25,478 --> 00:20:28,479
Does that mean Ray has
to beat people up for me?
537
00:20:28,481 --> 00:20:32,250
Sadly for you, even if this
Chase thing isn't happening,
538
00:20:32,252 --> 00:20:34,339
this blossoming is all too real.
539
00:20:34,364 --> 00:20:36,787
'Sup, bangs?
540
00:20:36,789 --> 00:20:39,774
541
00:20:39,799 --> 00:20:43,587
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
542
00:20:43,637 --> 00:20:48,187
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
38008
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese