All language subtitles for Deadbeat s01e05 Out-Of-Body Issues.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,726 --> 00:00:08,548 Previously on Deadbeat... 2 00:00:08,549 --> 00:00:10,664 Ghost stick around when they have unfinished business. 3 00:00:10,665 --> 00:00:14,095 Finishing unfinished business is my business. 4 00:00:14,096 --> 00:00:15,488 What else do we know about this guy? 5 00:00:15,489 --> 00:00:18,155 It seems he's fashioned himself a little ghost hut 6 00:00:18,156 --> 00:00:21,016 - out of a newsstand. - What are you scheming? 7 00:00:21,017 --> 00:00:22,703 - Camomile White. - Hi. 8 00:00:22,704 --> 00:00:24,351 Would you like to go out sometime? 9 00:00:24,352 --> 00:00:25,797 That's not what I thought you'd say. 10 00:00:25,798 --> 00:00:28,100 - Do you want to take my number? - Oh. 11 00:00:28,101 --> 00:00:33,335 Call me when you want to... 12 00:00:33,336 --> 00:00:35,727 play. Call me. 13 00:01:12,042 --> 00:01:13,897 I don't get why she hasn't called me back. 14 00:01:13,898 --> 00:01:16,885 I mean, I have certainly left her enough voice messages 15 00:01:16,886 --> 00:01:18,443 to let her know I'm still interested. 16 00:01:18,444 --> 00:01:20,428 Look, why don't you just break into her apartment 17 00:01:20,429 --> 00:01:22,492 and wear all her clothes and wait for her? 18 00:01:22,493 --> 00:01:24,080 I do know where she lives. 19 00:01:24,081 --> 00:01:25,341 Look, just play it cool, you know? 20 00:01:25,342 --> 00:01:26,869 People love what they can't have. 21 00:01:26,870 --> 00:01:30,810 And that's the principle. It's the same business with pa-chank. 22 00:01:30,811 --> 00:01:32,407 You can never try to impress a femmie. 23 00:01:32,408 --> 00:01:34,320 That's why I let them impress me. 24 00:01:34,321 --> 00:01:37,142 - Yeah, that makes sense. - Excuse me. Is this your place? 25 00:01:37,143 --> 00:01:39,782 I'm here 'cause I heard you deal with ghosts. 26 00:01:39,783 --> 00:01:41,856 - Yeah, he's the best. - I am the best. 27 00:01:41,857 --> 00:01:44,377 I work over at the United States of Apparel on Lex. 28 00:01:44,378 --> 00:01:46,958 It's that clothing store. I think it might be haunted. 29 00:01:46,959 --> 00:01:51,067 Uh, I'm sorry. Are you asking me questions? 30 00:01:51,068 --> 00:01:54,352 - Or... - No, that's the way she talks. 31 00:01:54,353 --> 00:01:56,208 - Oh. - Look, look. Sorry about him. 32 00:01:56,209 --> 00:01:57,667 - I got to get back to my shift, 33 00:01:57,668 --> 00:01:59,592 but can you take the case or not? 34 00:01:59,593 --> 00:02:01,280 I can't pay you money, but I can probably give you 35 00:02:01,281 --> 00:02:03,205 some merchandise left over from last season. 36 00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:05,557 Listen, I can't afford to do any more cases 37 00:02:05,558 --> 00:02:06,987 where I don't get paid in money for. 38 00:02:06,988 --> 00:02:09,875 You know what... I know somebody that can flip that merch into cash. 39 00:02:09,876 --> 00:02:13,190 - Oh, all right. - So can you come with me right now? 40 00:02:13,191 --> 00:02:14,679 - We on it, we on it. - We on it. 41 00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:16,574 We on it, baby. It's a ghost. 42 00:02:16,575 --> 00:02:19,194 Hey, you know what? I think you should let me come with you 43 00:02:19,195 --> 00:02:21,914 on this case. Could be like a ride along. 44 00:02:21,915 --> 00:02:24,197 Ah, I see what's going on here, man. 45 00:02:24,198 --> 00:02:25,983 You are head over heels for this girl. 46 00:02:25,984 --> 00:02:28,742 No, no. That's not what it is. I want to see, actually, 47 00:02:28,743 --> 00:02:31,025 what my best friend does on this job, you know? 48 00:02:31,026 --> 00:02:34,410 - Oh, do you? - Yes, yes. 49 00:02:34,411 --> 00:02:36,702 Okay, let's go. 50 00:02:47,611 --> 00:02:50,488 Oh, my God. I hate myself. 51 00:02:50,489 --> 00:02:53,644 Oh, come on, man. These hoes are pros, man, these skinny girls. 52 00:02:53,645 --> 00:02:55,699 Actually, all these poses are of girls 53 00:02:55,700 --> 00:02:57,386 that are employees or former employees. 54 00:02:57,387 --> 00:02:59,381 Word? 55 00:02:59,382 --> 00:03:02,726 Oh, my God. So I'm guessing this is you. 56 00:03:02,727 --> 00:03:06,607 Ha, ha, ha. It's from the spring 2014 line. 57 00:03:06,608 --> 00:03:08,899 Your ass is from the spring 2014 line? 58 00:03:08,900 --> 00:03:12,870 - The sock, silly. - Oh. I'll take that too. 59 00:03:29,257 --> 00:03:32,175 Hey there, doll face. I see you. 60 00:03:34,170 --> 00:03:36,184 What a weirdo. 61 00:03:36,185 --> 00:03:38,408 What? 62 00:03:39,539 --> 00:03:43,111 Okay. Let's get you in here. 63 00:03:43,112 --> 00:03:45,573 I'm sorry. Sorry. 64 00:03:45,574 --> 00:03:47,657 Yeah. 65 00:03:47,658 --> 00:03:50,575 Thought maybe you would like a little privacy. 66 00:03:50,576 --> 00:03:54,654 Oh, pardon me, where are my mannerisms? 67 00:03:54,655 --> 00:03:57,503 My name is Kevin, and I help ghosts. 68 00:03:57,504 --> 00:04:00,361 Even ghosts like you who have taken up root in, 69 00:04:00,362 --> 00:04:01,919 let's be honest, 70 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:04,966 in extraordinarily realistic vessels like this. 71 00:04:04,967 --> 00:04:07,120 You know like, 90 percent human basically. 72 00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:08,817 It's almost as if no one could fault a guy 73 00:04:08,818 --> 00:04:10,971 for getting confused and... 74 00:04:10,972 --> 00:04:13,917 inserting myself into you. 75 00:04:14,118 --> 00:04:16,880 I just so happen I have one of these pre-lubes, 76 00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:18,697 so you don't have to do any of the work. 77 00:04:18,698 --> 00:04:21,053 Lot of diseases out there. 78 00:04:21,754 --> 00:04:24,132 I just... 79 00:04:24,933 --> 00:04:26,857 Oh! Ah! Ha, ha, ha! 80 00:04:26,858 --> 00:04:28,842 Dude, what is your damage? 81 00:04:28,843 --> 00:04:31,036 I had to get you out of there somehow. Look, it worked. 82 00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,189 Wait, how... how can you hear me? 83 00:04:33,190 --> 00:04:37,408 Like I said to your mannequin, I'm Kevin. 84 00:04:37,409 --> 00:04:39,522 I help ghosts, all right? So let's rap, let's jive. 85 00:04:39,723 --> 00:04:41,776 Tell what you're doing here. What's your name? 86 00:04:41,777 --> 00:04:44,962 - Why are you haunting this store? - My name is Alice. 87 00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:46,689 I was just a girl from Bumblefork, Iowa. 88 00:04:46,690 --> 00:04:48,277 I moved to New York City 89 00:04:48,278 --> 00:04:51,235 with big eyes and a small waist and a medium-sized dream. 90 00:04:51,236 --> 00:04:53,051 I wanted to be a model. 91 00:04:53,052 --> 00:04:56,773 One day, the CEO of United States of Apparel, Reed Kelly, 92 00:04:56,774 --> 00:04:58,133 came in while I was working. 93 00:04:58,134 --> 00:05:00,048 We started talking about tube tops, 94 00:05:00,049 --> 00:05:02,172 and he must've been really interested in what I had to say 95 00:05:02,173 --> 00:05:03,701 because he asked me out. 96 00:05:03,702 --> 00:05:05,954 I went out with him, just the two of us. 97 00:05:05,955 --> 00:05:07,611 And that's when it happened. 98 00:05:07,612 --> 00:05:11,621 What? Oh. Oh, my God, did he... did he murder you? 99 00:05:11,622 --> 00:05:15,144 Worse. He kept on telling me how beautiful I was 100 00:05:15,145 --> 00:05:17,000 and how hot I was making him, and... 101 00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:20,712 Next thing I knew, I was stripped down to my underwear 102 00:05:20,713 --> 00:05:22,003 and he was taking pictures of me. 103 00:05:22,004 --> 00:05:24,722 Oh, my God, he exploitered you. 104 00:05:24,723 --> 00:05:27,640 Just like he exploitered every other girl in here. 105 00:05:27,641 --> 00:05:28,871 No. 106 00:05:28,872 --> 00:05:31,690 Those other girls, they got lucky. 107 00:05:31,691 --> 00:05:34,568 What do you mean? What did he do? 108 00:05:34,569 --> 00:05:36,523 He, uh... 109 00:05:36,524 --> 00:05:38,488 He... 110 00:05:38,489 --> 00:05:40,642 He didn't use my pictures. 111 00:05:40,643 --> 00:05:42,796 He didn't... 112 00:05:42,797 --> 00:05:44,384 Uh, ex-squeeze me? 113 00:05:44,385 --> 00:05:46,240 Not on billboards, not in the store, 114 00:05:46,241 --> 00:05:49,853 not even in those pop-up ads during words with friends. 115 00:05:53,506 --> 00:05:56,295 Calm down, calm down. I'm here to help, remember? 116 00:05:57,287 --> 00:05:58,606 - You are? - Yes. 117 00:05:58,607 --> 00:06:00,204 It sounds like a piece of cake. 118 00:06:00,205 --> 00:06:03,281 All I gotta do is meet with this CDO guy 119 00:06:03,282 --> 00:06:06,308 - and make him use these photos, right? - Yeah. 120 00:06:06,309 --> 00:06:10,120 - But there's just one problem. - What? 121 00:06:10,121 --> 00:06:11,777 Reed Kelly suffers from a debilitating case 122 00:06:11,778 --> 00:06:14,298 of cacomorphobia. 123 00:06:14,899 --> 00:06:16,814 Oh, no. Oh, boy. 124 00:06:16,815 --> 00:06:19,703 Is that the irrational fear of cocoa puffs? 125 00:06:20,264 --> 00:06:22,288 Uh, no. 126 00:06:22,289 --> 00:06:24,243 It's the fear of fat people. 127 00:06:24,244 --> 00:06:27,359 Fear of fat... 128 00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:29,055 Sorry. 129 00:06:35,946 --> 00:06:38,528 Cacomor...? It sounds like cockomorphobia. 130 00:06:38,529 --> 00:06:40,550 So it's not a fear of cocoa puffs, 131 00:06:40,551 --> 00:06:43,002 it's a fear of those who consume them irresponsibly. 132 00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:45,462 Exactly. I have no idea how I get a meeting with this guy. 133 00:06:45,463 --> 00:06:47,943 Look at me. How am I gonna pass myself off as thin? 134 00:06:47,944 --> 00:06:49,597 I don't know, lose weight? 135 00:06:49,598 --> 00:06:51,992 Oh, get serious, Roofie. Come on. 136 00:06:52,093 --> 00:06:55,070 What about you? You're skinny. You can talk to the CDO. 137 00:06:55,071 --> 00:06:58,524 Hey man, I would, but I got priors with N'Cole. 138 00:06:58,525 --> 00:06:59,746 With N'Cole? 139 00:07:01,112 --> 00:07:03,027 I knew it. I knew it, man. 140 00:07:03,428 --> 00:07:06,484 I mean, do you even know a guy who can flip women's clothing into cash? 141 00:07:06,485 --> 00:07:08,965 Or am I just gonna have to wear this stuff, like a fancy boy? 142 00:07:08,966 --> 00:07:12,936 I'm sorry, Pac, but, man, this bitch could be the one. 143 00:07:13,879 --> 00:07:15,694 You're really into this chick, huh? 144 00:07:15,695 --> 00:07:18,582 Almost. But she's all stressed about this ghost thing. 145 00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:22,701 Actually, you solving this could be major points for me. 146 00:07:23,102 --> 00:07:26,373 All right, all right, I will. I'll do it. 147 00:07:26,874 --> 00:07:29,195 I still have no idea how am I gonna get into his office. 148 00:07:29,296 --> 00:07:32,447 I don't know, just, you know, like, wear something slimming. 149 00:07:32,448 --> 00:07:34,432 Wear something slimming? 150 00:07:34,633 --> 00:07:36,458 Something that makes you look thinner. 151 00:07:36,559 --> 00:07:39,606 You know what? I think I have just the thing. 152 00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:13,214 Can I help you? 153 00:08:16,033 --> 00:08:17,362 I am Pierre L'Croissant, 154 00:08:17,363 --> 00:08:19,317 the very famous French fashion mongrel. 155 00:08:19,318 --> 00:08:20,677 Perhaps you have heard of me. 156 00:08:20,678 --> 00:08:23,992 I am arrived to see Reed Kelly. 157 00:08:23,993 --> 00:08:26,116 I'm sorry, if you don't have an appointment, 158 00:08:26,117 --> 00:08:28,438 I can't let you in. 159 00:08:28,439 --> 00:08:30,265 Do you really think that Pierre L'Croissant, 160 00:08:30,266 --> 00:08:31,654 the inventor of the cargo short, 161 00:08:31,655 --> 00:08:34,175 is accustomed to waiting for an appointment? 162 00:08:34,176 --> 00:08:37,123 Do you really think you're passing for three skinny people 163 00:08:37,124 --> 00:08:39,882 and not just one fat guy with two fake black heads 164 00:08:39,883 --> 00:08:41,501 mounted on his shoulders? 165 00:08:43,525 --> 00:08:45,509 Touch?. 166 00:08:45,510 --> 00:08:48,566 Okay, listen, I just need five minutes of Mr. Kelly's time. 167 00:08:48,567 --> 00:08:51,881 It's about an employee who was terrorizing one of his stores. 168 00:08:51,882 --> 00:08:54,432 It's a... it's a pretty young thing 169 00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:57,487 he had may have an indiscretion with. 170 00:08:57,488 --> 00:08:59,741 I think he'll wanna hear about it. 171 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:05,975 Mr. Kelly, there's a Pierre L'Croissant here 172 00:09:05,976 --> 00:09:07,998 to see you, says it's urgent. 173 00:09:07,999 --> 00:09:10,481 Quite fat, yeah. 174 00:09:12,179 --> 00:09:14,035 Okay. 175 00:09:16,854 --> 00:09:19,206 Thank you. 176 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,108 Mr. croissant. 177 00:09:24,109 --> 00:09:27,264 Mr. croissant, please, please come in. 178 00:09:27,265 --> 00:09:29,785 As a result of my involuntary repulsion 179 00:09:29,786 --> 00:09:31,701 towards people of considerable girth, 180 00:09:31,702 --> 00:09:34,758 I will have to conduct this meeting facing away from you. 181 00:09:34,759 --> 00:09:37,209 I completely understand, good sir. The reason I'm here... 182 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:40,564 - Oh. Stop, stop, stop. - What? 183 00:09:40,565 --> 00:09:42,152 - me. - What? 184 00:09:42,153 --> 00:09:44,673 Even your voice sounds fat. Look, do me a favor. 185 00:09:44,674 --> 00:09:48,644 Croissant, please there is a helium tank to your right. 186 00:09:49,518 --> 00:09:51,571 - Yeah, the pink one? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 187 00:09:51,572 --> 00:09:54,449 I always keep it on deck. I have an obese FedEx guy. 188 00:09:54,450 --> 00:09:56,811 - Do me a favor, just give it a little toot. - A little suck on this? 189 00:09:56,812 --> 00:09:58,529 Yeah, stop talking. Give it a little... 190 00:09:58,530 --> 00:09:59,929 Okay. 191 00:10:01,418 --> 00:10:04,336 Ah. Okay, is that better? 192 00:10:06,321 --> 00:10:07,580 Much. 193 00:10:07,581 --> 00:10:10,300 - Okay. - Thank you. I like that a lot. 194 00:10:10,301 --> 00:10:11,699 Anyway, you were saying? 195 00:10:11,700 --> 00:10:13,654 Yes, I was saying that... 196 00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:16,433 I'm afraid one of your stores is being haunted 197 00:10:16,434 --> 00:10:18,954 by a former employee named Alice N. 198 00:10:18,955 --> 00:10:20,910 She's a little peeved 199 00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:23,530 because you took some scandally type photos of her 200 00:10:23,531 --> 00:10:26,190 and then didn't use any of them. 201 00:10:27,382 --> 00:10:30,229 Son of a bitch. 202 00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,750 I knew this would come back to bite me right in the dick. 203 00:10:32,751 --> 00:10:34,477 Yeah. I know the girl you're talking about. 204 00:10:34,478 --> 00:10:35,906 Yes, yes. 205 00:10:35,907 --> 00:10:38,120 Got me. Okay. 206 00:10:38,121 --> 00:10:40,581 And there's a reason, a perfectly good reason 207 00:10:40,582 --> 00:10:42,268 that I did nothing with those photos. 208 00:10:42,269 --> 00:10:45,217 You see, I found out that Allison was in fact... 209 00:10:46,349 --> 00:10:47,539 My daughter. 210 00:10:47,540 --> 00:10:50,625 - What? - Yeah. 211 00:10:50,626 --> 00:10:53,474 From a one-night stand, years ago. 212 00:10:53,475 --> 00:10:56,193 - In middle school. - Oh, my God. 213 00:10:56,194 --> 00:10:59,379 - Whoa, helium, helium. Helium. - Yeah, I got it right here. 214 00:11:01,435 --> 00:11:03,687 Okay, we're back to square one. 215 00:11:03,688 --> 00:11:07,042 Oh, Jesus. Okay. Anyway, I'm sorry, 216 00:11:07,043 --> 00:11:09,890 but there's no way I could exploit my daughter. 217 00:11:09,891 --> 00:11:13,106 I mean, what kind of a monster do you think I am? 218 00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:16,322 Well, I will certainly tell Alice and... 219 00:11:16,323 --> 00:11:17,979 She's gonna be a little disappointed. 220 00:11:17,980 --> 00:11:19,577 Also, probably a little disturbed. 221 00:11:19,578 --> 00:11:21,929 Okay, I'm sorry. Hold on. 222 00:11:21,930 --> 00:11:23,418 Why do you keep saying her name that way? 223 00:11:23,419 --> 00:11:27,100 What? Oh, Alice N? Because I know two Alices, 224 00:11:27,101 --> 00:11:29,254 and this is how I keep them different in my head. 225 00:11:29,255 --> 00:11:33,502 This one is called Alice N, like new Alice, Alice New. 226 00:11:33,503 --> 00:11:36,251 - The other is Alice O for old... - Okay, hold on. 227 00:11:36,252 --> 00:11:37,909 Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. 228 00:11:37,910 --> 00:11:40,062 I got it. Ha, ha, ha. 229 00:11:40,063 --> 00:11:42,980 Wait a minute. Holy shit. 230 00:11:42,981 --> 00:11:46,861 Wait a second. I thought you were saying Allison. 231 00:11:46,862 --> 00:11:48,985 - No. Alice... - Yes. Can you understand 232 00:11:48,986 --> 00:11:50,742 why I thought you were saying Allison? 233 00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,796 - Because when you say Alice N, - Alice N, yeah. 234 00:11:52,797 --> 00:11:54,027 It sounds like Allison. 235 00:11:54,028 --> 00:11:57,005 - Oh, I guess so. - Okay. This Alice girl. 236 00:11:57,006 --> 00:11:59,833 This Alice "N", okay? 237 00:11:59,834 --> 00:12:03,009 I don't... I don't know who... that's not my daughter. 238 00:12:03,010 --> 00:12:05,203 No. Uh-uh. No, no, no. 239 00:12:05,204 --> 00:12:08,547 She's probably just some girl from Bumble , Iowa. 240 00:12:08,548 --> 00:12:11,862 - Uh, it's Bumblefork. - Whatever. Don't correct me. 241 00:12:11,863 --> 00:12:14,949 Anyway, I will totally exploit this Alice girl. 242 00:12:14,950 --> 00:12:16,875 Fantastic. Yeah. 243 00:12:16,876 --> 00:12:20,855 That is great news. Uh, but what about your daughter? 244 00:12:20,856 --> 00:12:22,909 The other Allison? 245 00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:24,796 Let's just forget about her. 246 00:12:29,610 --> 00:12:32,090 - These are the photos from Reed. - Fat. 247 00:12:32,091 --> 00:12:34,581 Fat. F.U.P.A. 248 00:12:34,582 --> 00:12:36,070 Fat. 249 00:12:36,071 --> 00:12:37,727 Bloated earlobe. 250 00:12:37,728 --> 00:12:39,683 Melon groove. 251 00:12:39,684 --> 00:12:42,442 Look at these rolls of fat on my side here. 252 00:12:42,443 --> 00:12:43,762 Those are ribs. 253 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,360 Are these really all of them? 254 00:12:45,361 --> 00:12:47,712 I think you look super-duper skinny in these. 255 00:12:47,713 --> 00:12:49,270 Well, compared to you, maybe. 256 00:12:49,271 --> 00:12:51,890 You're like one big human carbohydrate. 257 00:12:51,891 --> 00:12:55,870 Hey. I happen to love my body for what it is, okay? 258 00:12:55,871 --> 00:12:57,757 - Well, aren't you lucky? - Yes. 259 00:12:59,286 --> 00:13:01,438 What the hell? 260 00:13:01,439 --> 00:13:03,691 Roofie? Are those kitty cats in your underwear? 261 00:13:03,692 --> 00:13:06,778 Yo, what the hell? I thought you was dealing with the haunting. 262 00:13:06,779 --> 00:13:10,589 I tried, I tried. There is just no pleasing this ghost. 263 00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:12,614 She has got major body issues. 264 00:13:12,615 --> 00:13:14,599 She doesn't even have a body anymore. 265 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:16,396 Look, please don't let me down, man. 266 00:13:16,397 --> 00:13:18,619 N'Cole got some melon grooves a dude could get lost in. 267 00:13:18,620 --> 00:13:20,890 I wanna help you with that, but I can't. 268 00:13:20,891 --> 00:13:25,050 - Hey, Please finish this, all right? - Yeah, okay. 269 00:13:25,051 --> 00:13:26,092 Uhh. 270 00:13:29,210 --> 00:13:30,866 Hey, hey, hey. 271 00:13:30,867 --> 00:13:33,556 Hey, girl. 272 00:13:33,557 --> 00:13:36,573 Listen, I was thinking we could take those pictures 273 00:13:36,574 --> 00:13:39,491 and photoshop them to make you look as skinny as you want. 274 00:13:39,492 --> 00:13:41,377 No, that would be cheating. 275 00:13:41,378 --> 00:13:43,372 I mean, those photos are supposed to show 276 00:13:43,373 --> 00:13:46,022 my hard w ork and dedication to... 277 00:13:46,023 --> 00:13:47,947 Oh, my God. I'm such an idiot. 278 00:13:47,948 --> 00:13:50,131 Wait. Okay, those photos from the boat, 279 00:13:50,132 --> 00:13:52,354 those were taken before my tapeworm diet. 280 00:13:52,355 --> 00:13:53,843 Before your what? 281 00:13:53,844 --> 00:13:55,203 A few weeks after the photo-bang, 282 00:13:55,204 --> 00:13:58,061 I went down to Mexico and ingested a tapeworm. 283 00:13:58,062 --> 00:14:00,384 For months, I could eat whatever I wanted and still lose weight. 284 00:14:00,385 --> 00:14:03,133 I paid a pretty peso for it, but it was totally worth it, 285 00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:05,823 - until it finally killed me. - Yeah. 286 00:14:05,824 --> 00:14:08,076 Someone should probably put a warning on those things. 287 00:14:08,077 --> 00:14:09,793 - I know. - Anyway, 288 00:14:09,794 --> 00:14:11,053 what are you telling me this for? 289 00:14:11,054 --> 00:14:12,236 Don't you see? 290 00:14:12,237 --> 00:14:14,805 I mean, right before I died, I was at my ideal body weight, 291 00:14:14,806 --> 00:14:16,730 but I don't have any pictures of it. 292 00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:18,189 Not even a little selfie? 293 00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:20,740 No, I was too weak to lift the camera. 294 00:14:20,741 --> 00:14:25,544 Okay. I'm not gonna go dig up your corpse 295 00:14:25,545 --> 00:14:27,300 and take creepy pictures of it. 296 00:14:27,301 --> 00:14:29,226 - No, of course not. - Okay, good because... 297 00:14:29,227 --> 00:14:32,481 - No, those pictures should be sexy. - Yes. A... wait, what? 298 00:14:32,482 --> 00:14:34,705 Sexy, but tasteful. 299 00:14:34,706 --> 00:14:37,018 Oh. 300 00:14:45,742 --> 00:14:47,796 The things we do for pa-chank. 301 00:14:47,797 --> 00:14:49,692 Oh, the things you do for pa-chank. 302 00:14:49,693 --> 00:14:51,806 I'm doing this for ill-fitting women's clothing. 303 00:14:51,807 --> 00:14:53,771 From last season, no less. 304 00:14:53,772 --> 00:14:56,083 What happened to the advice about the principle? 305 00:14:56,084 --> 00:14:57,949 Never going out of your way to impress a femmie? 306 00:14:57,950 --> 00:15:00,599 We're about to dig up a grave so you can get laid. 307 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:03,745 The principle applies, okay? It's just complicated. 308 00:15:03,746 --> 00:15:06,703 You gotta get a girl to a tipping point, right? 309 00:15:06,704 --> 00:15:09,016 And you gotta do whatever to push her over the edge. 310 00:15:09,017 --> 00:15:11,437 You sound like a real Reed Kelly right now. 311 00:15:11,438 --> 00:15:13,333 - Reed Kelly? - Yeah. You're exploitering me. 312 00:15:13,334 --> 00:15:14,822 What? You think I wanna be here? 313 00:15:14,823 --> 00:15:16,906 What? Oh, I don't know. You tell me, exploiterer. 314 00:15:16,907 --> 00:15:19,794 - Let's just get this over with. - Yeah. 315 00:15:24,470 --> 00:15:26,494 Yo, man, I'm freaked out, man. 316 00:15:26,495 --> 00:15:28,221 I'm, like, wondering what's under here, 317 00:15:28,222 --> 00:15:30,772 like it's a model dead chick that's gonna pop up 318 00:15:30,773 --> 00:15:32,201 like tales from the crypt,�like 319 00:15:33,621 --> 00:15:35,784 What? No. She's only been dead for two weeks. 320 00:15:35,785 --> 00:15:39,327 Probably an embalmed body takes months to decompose. 321 00:15:39,328 --> 00:15:41,153 How do you even know that? 322 00:15:41,154 --> 00:15:44,369 Because, Roofie, I know some stuff about some stuff, okay? 323 00:15:44,370 --> 00:15:48,340 I don't ask you how much a quarter pound of weed weighs. 324 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:52,130 Look. This is it. 325 00:16:03,307 --> 00:16:04,498 Okay. 326 00:16:06,950 --> 00:16:08,338 - Good. You ready? - Yeah. 327 00:16:08,339 --> 00:16:10,363 All right, on the count of 30. 328 00:16:10,364 --> 00:16:12,288 One... 329 00:16:12,289 --> 00:16:13,847 - Two... - Come on, man. 330 00:16:13,848 --> 00:16:15,534 What? All right, okay. 331 00:16:18,125 --> 00:16:20,011 - She looks like a damn corpse. - Beautiful. 332 00:16:22,234 --> 00:16:24,853 She was a handsome lady. 333 00:16:24,854 --> 00:16:27,771 So, what should I do? Should I, like, try and make her smile? 334 00:16:27,772 --> 00:16:29,970 No, give her the duck lips like everybody got on. 335 00:16:29,971 --> 00:16:34,104 Oh. Oh, good. Good call. 336 00:16:34,105 --> 00:16:35,364 Ooh. 337 00:16:35,365 --> 00:16:37,756 - Oh! - Aw, nuts, I think I broke her jaw. 338 00:16:37,757 --> 00:16:39,314 - What's the matter with you? - I don't know. 339 00:16:39,315 --> 00:16:42,064 My weight just shifted. I... let me see if I can fix it. 340 00:16:42,065 --> 00:16:45,319 - Oh, no, it's okay. - Dislocation. Just fix it, fix it. 341 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:47,374 All right. I got it. 342 00:16:47,375 --> 00:16:50,292 There we go. 343 00:16:50,293 --> 00:16:51,810 What is that? 344 00:16:56,258 --> 00:16:57,746 Goddamn it. 345 00:16:59,116 --> 00:17:01,070 - Oh, my God. - Kill it, kill it, kill it! 346 00:17:01,071 --> 00:17:04,147 - Die! - Kill it! Kill it! 347 00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:06,102 Oh, it's the Mexican tapeworm from the diet. 348 00:17:06,103 --> 00:17:08,861 It's Medusa's cousin. 349 00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:10,916 Okay, get the picture, get the picture. 350 00:17:10,917 --> 00:17:13,864 - Oh! God! So gross. - I'm gonna get the picture. 351 00:17:16,554 --> 00:17:18,112 Did you get it? Did you get it? 352 00:17:18,113 --> 00:17:20,196 - I got it. - Oh, good. 353 00:17:20,197 --> 00:17:23,015 - You're kidding me, right? - What do you mean? 354 00:17:23,016 --> 00:17:24,613 You look so thin. 355 00:17:24,614 --> 00:17:27,858 - Yo, what's she saying? - Hold on. 356 00:17:27,859 --> 00:17:29,416 Look at my hair and make-up in these. 357 00:17:29,417 --> 00:17:31,540 I mean, what, was I styled by a mortician? 358 00:17:31,541 --> 00:17:33,823 - Well, yeah. - Not to mention 359 00:17:33,824 --> 00:17:35,788 I'm not wearing United States of Apparel in these. 360 00:17:35,789 --> 00:17:37,545 They'll never put them up on the wall. 361 00:17:37,546 --> 00:17:39,064 That was the whole point of this, remember? 362 00:17:39,065 --> 00:17:40,989 I do, I do. 363 00:17:40,990 --> 00:17:44,960 She's upset about the hair and makeup and clothing choices. 364 00:17:45,367 --> 00:17:48,611 So she want us to go back to the cemetery, re-exhume her body, 365 00:17:48,612 --> 00:17:50,735 and go all extreme makeover on her ass? 366 00:17:52,463 --> 00:17:55,311 Wait, wait, wait. That's actually a good idea. 367 00:17:55,312 --> 00:17:57,306 - Huh? - A makeover? 368 00:17:57,307 --> 00:17:58,696 Wait, what? 369 00:18:44,024 --> 00:18:46,118 - I don't know. - You don't know? 370 00:18:46,119 --> 00:18:47,974 - What don't you know? - Mommy, look. 371 00:18:47,975 --> 00:18:50,625 I wanna look just like that girl when I grow up. 372 00:18:52,977 --> 00:18:55,001 Did you hear that little girl? 373 00:18:55,002 --> 00:18:56,529 What, the one that wants to grow up 374 00:18:56,530 --> 00:18:59,050 and look like a malnourished corpse? Yeah, I heard her. 375 00:18:59,051 --> 00:19:02,464 My whole life, I've been taught by magazines and movies 376 00:19:02,465 --> 00:19:05,481 that being thin was what made me worth anything. 377 00:19:05,482 --> 00:19:08,965 That girl might develop an eating disorder because of me. 378 00:19:08,966 --> 00:19:10,920 It's me. I'm part of the problem. 379 00:19:10,921 --> 00:19:14,037 Which means... 380 00:19:14,038 --> 00:19:16,985 That I'm finally a real model. 381 00:19:18,415 --> 00:19:21,332 Yeah, that's it, that's what that means. 382 00:19:21,333 --> 00:19:23,159 Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. 383 00:19:27,228 --> 00:19:29,054 - Yes. - That's how you do it. 384 00:19:29,055 --> 00:19:31,943 - Now I can roll around and... - Hey! 385 00:19:33,670 --> 00:19:35,227 What the hell's all of this? 386 00:19:35,228 --> 00:19:37,212 Another ghost case solved, honey melon. 387 00:19:37,213 --> 00:19:38,741 It was easy. All we had to do 388 00:19:38,742 --> 00:19:40,567 was convince Kelly to put up these photos. 389 00:19:40,568 --> 00:19:43,078 Yeah, and he put it up over mine. 390 00:19:43,079 --> 00:19:45,599 We through, Roofie. And you, 391 00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:47,296 you're not getting that leftover merchandise. 392 00:19:47,297 --> 00:19:50,680 - Oh, come on. Damn it. - This is... 393 00:19:50,681 --> 00:19:52,596 I thought you didn't want the merchandise. 394 00:19:52,597 --> 00:19:55,752 I didn't want the merchandise. But now that I can't have it, 395 00:19:55,753 --> 00:19:56,943 all I can think about is the... 396 00:19:56,944 --> 00:19:58,630 - The principle. - See? 397 00:19:58,631 --> 00:20:00,089 - It does play. - See? 398 00:20:00,090 --> 00:20:02,878 - I get it now. I see it crystal clear. - Crystal clear. 399 00:20:02,879 --> 00:20:04,903 - Gotta give you credit, man. - Hey. 400 00:20:04,904 --> 00:20:07,990 Does kind of suck we didn't get anything from today though. 401 00:20:07,991 --> 00:20:11,761 Hm. I mean, we got to... the facial was good. 402 00:20:11,762 --> 00:20:13,459 The makeover thing, that was kind of cool. 403 00:20:13,460 --> 00:20:15,583 The cucumbers and... 404 00:20:15,584 --> 00:20:18,104 Uh, the baseball game was pretty good. 405 00:20:18,105 --> 00:20:20,754 - What day are you talking about? - Oh. Never mind. 406 00:20:20,755 --> 00:20:22,679 That's another day. You're talking about today. 407 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,297 - Today. - Today was good. Yeah. 408 00:20:24,298 --> 00:20:26,382 - Let's get manis and pedis. - Yeah, I'm starving. 409 00:20:33,469 --> 00:20:36,525 I wonder if I have body issues. 410 00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:39,204 I don't think so. 411 00:20:39,205 --> 00:20:41,358 You definitely have body issues, little buddy. 412 00:20:42,749 --> 00:20:45,795 Look at you, you got such a weird body. 413 00:20:45,796 --> 00:20:48,484 Well, I think maybe we should do a little acid 414 00:20:48,485 --> 00:20:52,296 and reward ourselves for a job well done. I think so. 415 00:20:52,297 --> 00:20:54,679 Down the hatch. Ohh. 416 00:20:58,718 --> 00:21:01,040 Hey, excuse me, Holmes? 417 00:21:05,020 --> 00:21:08,394 Oh, come on. What are you? The ghost of the tapeworm? 418 00:21:08,395 --> 00:21:10,379 Well, I'm out of here. Come on, man. 419 00:21:10,380 --> 00:21:13,456 I'm just trying to get home to see mi familia in Mexico. 420 00:21:13,457 --> 00:21:16,304 No, no, I'm not dealing with this. 421 00:21:16,305 --> 00:21:17,793 I got a head full of acid. 422 00:21:17,794 --> 00:21:19,818 Oh, come on, man, I can pay you. 423 00:21:19,819 --> 00:21:21,972 I can pay you real good. 424 00:21:21,973 --> 00:21:24,056 - Oh. - Let's go, man. 425 00:21:24,057 --> 00:21:26,269 I can't move on till I know they're okay. 426 00:21:26,270 --> 00:21:28,424 Come on, cholo. Arriba. 427 00:21:58,795 --> 00:22:01,116 Aah! 428 00:22:01,166 --> 00:22:05,716 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32713

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