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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,780 --> 00:00:06,781 - (factory whistle blowing) - _ 2 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:14,322 (moaning, babbles) 3 00:00:14,356 --> 00:00:18,693 (cat yowls and car alarm) 4 00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,595 Please stay green, please... 5 00:00:20,629 --> 00:00:22,964 Come on, come on! 6 00:00:22,998 --> 00:00:24,966 - Damn it! - (tires screeching) 7 00:00:24,981 --> 00:00:26,681 Are we there?! Are we at camp?! 8 00:00:26,716 --> 00:00:28,116 Almost, honey. 9 00:00:28,150 --> 00:00:30,785 One f'ing light in this craphole town, 10 00:00:30,820 --> 00:00:33,522 and I hit it every mother-loving year. 11 00:00:33,556 --> 00:00:34,956 I can see the entrance! 12 00:00:34,991 --> 00:00:36,625 You guys are so lucky you get to live 13 00:00:36,659 --> 00:00:38,426 next to the best place in the world. 14 00:00:39,003 --> 00:00:41,062 Hey! That guy's got a sleeping bag! 15 00:00:41,097 --> 00:00:43,131 Mom, maybe he needs a ride to camp! 16 00:00:43,165 --> 00:00:45,367 Whole town's got the camp spirit. 17 00:00:45,401 --> 00:00:48,103 Not too close to the fire, boys! You'll burn your dogs! 18 00:00:48,137 --> 00:00:50,472 But that's how my friend Snot likes them! 19 00:00:50,506 --> 00:00:52,307 We're finally in the big-boy cabin this year! 20 00:00:52,341 --> 00:00:53,608 Can you believe it?! 21 00:00:55,444 --> 00:00:56,811 Oh, arts and crafts. 22 00:00:58,381 --> 00:01:00,448 How long is this damn light? 23 00:01:00,483 --> 00:01:02,684 Big boys rule the camp, yeah! 24 00:01:02,718 --> 00:01:03,985 Big boys rule the camp! 25 00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:05,353 Tomahawk! 26 00:01:05,388 --> 00:01:07,155 Big boys rule the camp, yeah 27 00:01:07,189 --> 00:01:08,857 Big boys rule the camp, uh-huh 28 00:01:08,891 --> 00:01:12,761 The big boys rule the camp 29 00:01:12,795 --> 00:01:14,362 That guy gets it. 30 00:01:14,397 --> 00:01:15,597 (glass shatters) 31 00:01:15,631 --> 00:01:17,332 Ooh, free hammer! 32 00:01:17,366 --> 00:01:20,001 Did anyone see that throw? 33 00:01:20,036 --> 00:01:22,437 34 00:01:22,471 --> 00:01:25,140 Good morning, U.S.A. 35 00:01:25,174 --> 00:01:28,977 I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day 36 00:01:29,011 --> 00:01:32,113 The sun in the sky has a smile on his face 37 00:01:32,148 --> 00:01:36,451 And he's shinin' a salute to the American race 38 00:01:38,354 --> 00:01:41,790 Oh, boy, it's swell to say 39 00:01:41,824 --> 00:01:44,259 - Good... - Good morning, U.S.A. 40 00:01:44,293 --> 00:01:45,226 Aah! 41 00:01:46,662 --> 00:01:49,998 Good morning, U.S.A. 42 00:01:50,032 --> 00:01:51,533 COUNSELOR: I said-a boom, chicka boom 43 00:01:51,567 --> 00:01:54,035 CAMPERS: I said-a boom, chicka boom 44 00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:55,537 ALL: I said a-boom, chicka rocka 45 00:01:55,571 --> 00:01:57,205 Chicka rocka, chicka boom 46 00:01:57,239 --> 00:01:58,873 Oh, boy, Snotski. 47 00:01:58,908 --> 00:02:00,508 Looks like someone was in such a rush, 48 00:02:00,543 --> 00:02:01,743 he forgot his sleeping bag. 49 00:02:01,777 --> 00:02:03,678 No matter. You can share mine. 50 00:02:03,713 --> 00:02:05,013 We'll just sleep nose-to-nose... 51 00:02:05,047 --> 00:02:07,482 keep our privates at a respectful distance 52 00:02:07,516 --> 00:02:08,883 and our faces... 53 00:02:08,918 --> 00:02:10,085 mashed together, I guess. 54 00:02:10,119 --> 00:02:12,354 Actually, Steve, I won't need 55 00:02:12,388 --> 00:02:13,555 my own bedding this summer, 56 00:02:13,589 --> 00:02:14,990 'cause I have this. 57 00:02:15,024 --> 00:02:16,225 Whoa, buddy! 58 00:02:16,225 --> 00:02:18,560 Only counselors are allowed to have whistles. 59 00:02:18,594 --> 00:02:20,095 Wait. Are you... 60 00:02:20,129 --> 00:02:21,696 A counselor-in-training. 61 00:02:21,731 --> 00:02:23,932 My whistle's corked so you can't blow through it. 62 00:02:23,966 --> 00:02:27,869 But Chief Danny says if I do a good job with the Lil' Apaches, 63 00:02:27,903 --> 00:02:30,872 I'll get full whistle privileges. 64 00:02:30,906 --> 00:02:33,908 How...'s it going, boys? 65 00:02:33,943 --> 00:02:35,644 I tell ya, Steve, every time I see you, 66 00:02:35,678 --> 00:02:37,312 I just want to give you a wedgie! 67 00:02:37,346 --> 00:02:39,748 You've got a wedgie face. Anyone ever tell you that? 68 00:02:39,782 --> 00:02:41,349 I usually get "Ellen Page." 69 00:02:41,384 --> 00:02:42,851 But I'm a big Cherokee now, 70 00:02:42,885 --> 00:02:44,886 so I'll be the one giving the wedgies. 71 00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:46,855 Actually, no one will be giving wedgies. 72 00:02:46,889 --> 00:02:49,724 Thanks to a lawsuit that until now, I was sure you'd filed, 73 00:02:49,759 --> 00:02:52,360 we have a zero-tolerance policy for bullying. 74 00:02:52,395 --> 00:02:54,062 I don't like it personally, 75 00:02:54,096 --> 00:02:56,898 but it's really helpful for the wimps and the Polacks. 76 00:02:58,868 --> 00:03:02,037 Why would you choose to be a C.I.T. instead of a camper? 77 00:03:02,071 --> 00:03:04,239 If you're a C.I.T., you don't have to pay. 78 00:03:04,273 --> 00:03:06,708 It's the only way I could afford to come this year. 79 00:03:06,742 --> 00:03:08,309 I always forget how poor you are. 80 00:03:08,344 --> 00:03:10,111 I drink generic milk. 81 00:03:10,146 --> 00:03:12,914 It's gray and comes in a bag. 82 00:03:12,948 --> 00:03:15,750 I think it's softening my bones. 83 00:03:15,785 --> 00:03:17,585 But I promise you, nothing is going to change 84 00:03:17,620 --> 00:03:18,987 between us this summer. 85 00:03:19,021 --> 00:03:20,555 Big boys rule the camp? 86 00:03:20,589 --> 00:03:22,691 BOTH: Yeah, big boys rule the ca... 87 00:03:23,926 --> 00:03:26,995 I'm part of a class-action lawsuit. 88 00:03:27,029 --> 00:03:29,497 89 00:03:29,532 --> 00:03:31,399 You all laughed at me, 90 00:03:31,434 --> 00:03:34,436 but I told you we needed five newspaper subscriptions. 91 00:03:34,470 --> 00:03:35,770 Happy anniversary, babe! 92 00:03:35,805 --> 00:03:38,540 Oh, yeah, congratulations, you two! 93 00:03:38,574 --> 00:03:40,075 Which anniversary is it? 94 00:03:40,109 --> 00:03:42,377 Is it one? 95 00:03:42,411 --> 00:03:43,978 Is it two? 96 00:03:44,013 --> 00:03:46,247 Is it 69? 97 00:03:46,282 --> 00:03:47,549 (laughing) 98 00:03:47,583 --> 00:03:49,117 Well executed, Jeff. 99 00:03:49,151 --> 00:03:52,053 You just earned yourself one month of USA Today. 100 00:03:52,088 --> 00:03:54,289 Anyway, we're gonna celebrate by heading out to Burning Man. 101 00:03:54,323 --> 00:03:56,725 I used to burn. Got too corporate. 102 00:03:56,759 --> 00:03:58,960 Now you gotta poo in designated areas. 103 00:03:58,994 --> 00:04:01,463 Anyhoo, how'd you get tickets? I hear it's hard now. 104 00:04:01,497 --> 00:04:03,298 Uh... 105 00:04:03,332 --> 00:04:05,233 You didn't get tickets? 106 00:04:05,267 --> 00:04:07,268 You told me you were taking care of it! 107 00:04:07,303 --> 00:04:08,970 (imitating Jeff) "I got it covered, babe." 108 00:04:09,004 --> 00:04:11,072 Hey, don't get on the naggin' wagon now. 109 00:04:11,107 --> 00:04:13,308 Could've used that when I forgot to get tickets! 110 00:04:13,342 --> 00:04:15,944 Ugh! Way to ruin our anniversary! 111 00:04:15,978 --> 00:04:18,847 69 years down the drain. 112 00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:21,426 _ 113 00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:24,296 ...which is how this camp came to be built 114 00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:27,868 on an ancient Indian burial ground. 115 00:04:27,903 --> 00:04:28,400 Which tribe? 116 00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,236 The, uh... Whatever, kid. They were friggin' Indians. 117 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,840 And some say their zombie chief still haunts the camp. 118 00:04:34,874 --> 00:04:36,074 (light switch clicks) 119 00:04:36,289 --> 00:04:38,490 Whoa, whoa, Steve! What's going on? 120 00:04:38,524 --> 00:04:41,293 Just telling the Lil' Apaches here the legend of the camp. 121 00:04:41,327 --> 00:04:44,963 (as the Cryptkeeper) It's a great "dead" -time story. 122 00:04:44,997 --> 00:04:47,332 (laughing evilly) 123 00:04:47,366 --> 00:04:49,234 Okay, maybe that's not a good idea. 124 00:04:49,268 --> 00:04:51,002 If you get 'em all riled up, 125 00:04:51,037 --> 00:04:52,337 I'm the one that has to read 'em 126 00:04:52,371 --> 00:04:54,239 an extra chapter of "Super Fudge". 127 00:04:54,273 --> 00:04:55,907 (normal voice) I thought this C.I.T. stuff 128 00:04:55,942 --> 00:04:57,409 wasn't going to change us having fun. 129 00:04:57,443 --> 00:04:59,010 It's not! 130 00:04:59,045 --> 00:05:01,980 Look, let's hang at the rope swing tomorrow after lunch, 131 00:05:02,014 --> 00:05:03,248 just you and me. 132 00:05:03,282 --> 00:05:04,683 What about them? 133 00:05:04,717 --> 00:05:06,051 They'll be writing letters home 134 00:05:06,085 --> 00:05:09,354 and playing with the iPads they smuggle in. 135 00:05:09,388 --> 00:05:10,355 Right, guys? 136 00:05:10,389 --> 00:05:12,057 We don't all have iPads. 137 00:05:12,091 --> 00:05:13,692 (laughter) 138 00:05:13,726 --> 00:05:16,361 My Etch-a-Sketch can do something your iPad can't. 139 00:05:17,964 --> 00:05:20,365 140 00:05:21,165 --> 00:05:23,535 Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on! 141 00:05:25,071 --> 00:05:27,339 Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on! 142 00:05:28,841 --> 00:05:30,842 Since you couldn't go to Burning Man, 143 00:05:30,877 --> 00:05:33,311 I brought Burning Man to you! 144 00:05:33,346 --> 00:05:37,082 I'm giving you two the best anniversary ever. 145 00:05:37,116 --> 00:05:38,817 And tearing up my lawn! 146 00:05:38,851 --> 00:05:40,385 It's a Burn, Stan. 147 00:05:40,419 --> 00:05:43,021 The only limit... 148 00:05:43,055 --> 00:05:44,656 is your mind. 149 00:05:44,690 --> 00:05:46,558 (crash) 150 00:05:46,592 --> 00:05:48,160 And the property line. 151 00:05:48,194 --> 00:05:50,529 (crickets chirping) 152 00:05:50,563 --> 00:05:52,697 I can't believe Snot stood me up. 153 00:05:52,732 --> 00:05:55,534 I've wasted the whole day flawlessly skipping stones. 154 00:05:55,568 --> 00:05:58,570 Oh, no! It's the man from the other side of the lake! 155 00:05:58,604 --> 00:06:00,238 Are these yours?! 156 00:06:00,273 --> 00:06:04,242 Your stone hit me and my wife while we were making love! 157 00:06:04,277 --> 00:06:06,211 You were alone over there. 158 00:06:06,245 --> 00:06:08,280 That is one narrative! 159 00:06:08,314 --> 00:06:10,782 - - _ 160 00:06:10,816 --> 00:06:12,484 SNOT: (thinking) As far back as I can remember, 161 00:06:12,518 --> 00:06:14,619 I always wanted to be a counselor. 162 00:06:14,654 --> 00:06:18,723 Hey, what do you call 50 townies at the bottom of a rockslide? 163 00:06:18,758 --> 00:06:21,860 A good start! (laughter) 164 00:06:21,894 --> 00:06:24,629 Good one, Chief! Get you another Sprite? 165 00:06:24,664 --> 00:06:27,532 I don't know, Snot. Do townies eat their own shit? 166 00:06:27,567 --> 00:06:29,668 (laughter) 167 00:06:31,671 --> 00:06:33,071 To me, being a counselor 168 00:06:33,105 --> 00:06:36,041 was better than being president of the United States. 169 00:06:36,075 --> 00:06:40,312 It meant being a somebody in a town full of nobodies. 170 00:06:40,346 --> 00:06:42,080 STEVE: You guys get Sprite?! 171 00:06:42,114 --> 00:06:46,384 Camper Steve? What are you doing in the counselor cabin?! 172 00:06:46,419 --> 00:06:49,454 I'm sorry, Chief. Just a little misunderstanding. 173 00:06:49,488 --> 00:06:52,857 Do you have any idea how long I was waiting out there for you? 174 00:06:52,892 --> 00:06:53,799 I'm sorry. 175 00:06:53,799 --> 00:06:55,894 What happened to us having fun together? 176 00:06:55,928 --> 00:06:58,063 - I have responsibilities now, - _ 177 00:06:58,097 --> 00:06:59,297 grown-up stuff. 178 00:06:59,332 --> 00:07:00,832 That are more important than me? 179 00:07:00,866 --> 00:07:01,900 Yes! 180 00:07:01,934 --> 00:07:04,569 I mean... sometimes. 181 00:07:04,604 --> 00:07:05,570 Yes. 182 00:07:05,605 --> 00:07:07,739 Oh. Okay. 183 00:07:07,773 --> 00:07:08,940 Look, Steve... 184 00:07:08,975 --> 00:07:09,975 Apology accepted. 185 00:07:10,009 --> 00:07:11,576 I wasn't apologizing. 186 00:07:11,611 --> 00:07:15,280 I was just gonna say it's bedtime for you. 187 00:07:16,882 --> 00:07:18,250 What a dick. 188 00:07:18,284 --> 00:07:20,619 - I'm still here. - I wasn't talking to you. 189 00:07:22,755 --> 00:07:26,358 This guy was talking to this guy about how much of a dick he is. 190 00:07:26,392 --> 00:07:28,593 I'm tired of you guys fighting all the time. 191 00:07:28,628 --> 00:07:31,096 You want to make up in my mouth? 192 00:07:31,130 --> 00:07:33,565 (moaning) 193 00:07:33,599 --> 00:07:37,168 BOY: This, Smith. This is why no one wants to canoe with you. 194 00:07:39,070 --> 00:07:40,070 _ 195 00:07:41,071 --> 00:07:43,573 Hey, guys! How was arts and crafts? 196 00:07:43,607 --> 00:07:45,575 You make some cool dreamcatchers? 197 00:07:46,844 --> 00:07:48,611 Great! Great! 198 00:07:48,645 --> 00:07:52,315 I've just been finding all the candy you hid in here! 199 00:07:52,349 --> 00:07:55,118 In your pillowcases, under your mattresses. 200 00:07:55,152 --> 00:07:59,722 And, guys, come on. I know "Todd" isn't a real camper. 201 00:07:59,757 --> 00:08:02,291 He's just a bunch of Starburst mushed together 202 00:08:02,326 --> 00:08:03,960 wearing Noah's clothes. 203 00:08:03,994 --> 00:08:06,496 Didn't you used to sneak candy into camp? 204 00:08:06,530 --> 00:08:08,464 Yeah, when I was a kid. 205 00:08:08,499 --> 00:08:10,800 Now you're looking at a grown-ass man. 206 00:08:10,834 --> 00:08:12,135 Do you see this? 207 00:08:12,169 --> 00:08:15,505 This is what a grown-ass man looks like. 208 00:08:15,539 --> 00:08:17,306 You are all missing swimming. 209 00:08:17,341 --> 00:08:18,841 And if I find this stuff again, 210 00:08:18,876 --> 00:08:20,643 I'm gonna make you smell these Air Walks 211 00:08:20,677 --> 00:08:23,880 I've been wearing all summer without socks. 212 00:08:23,914 --> 00:08:27,016 STEVE: Snot's not letting you have any fun, huh? 213 00:08:27,050 --> 00:08:28,584 Well, I'm here to change that. 214 00:08:32,890 --> 00:08:34,056 (inhaling) 215 00:08:34,091 --> 00:08:36,392 (coughing) 216 00:08:36,426 --> 00:08:37,994 (straining) That's a lot of powdered sugar. 217 00:08:38,028 --> 00:08:39,529 (coughing) 218 00:08:42,132 --> 00:08:43,766 What is happening? 219 00:08:45,702 --> 00:08:47,069 What is happening is... 220 00:08:47,104 --> 00:08:48,604 (coughing) 221 00:08:48,639 --> 00:08:49,438 ...is I'm... 222 00:08:49,473 --> 00:08:51,908 (coughing) 223 00:08:53,143 --> 00:08:54,944 Mm! Whew! 224 00:08:54,978 --> 00:08:57,413 I'm here to invite you guys on a panty raid. 225 00:08:57,447 --> 00:08:59,282 Won't that get us in more trouble? 226 00:08:59,316 --> 00:09:01,584 Listen, I came here to have fun! 227 00:09:01,618 --> 00:09:03,853 This time tomorrow, we could all be knee-deep 228 00:09:03,887 --> 00:09:06,989 in stolen Disney princess Underoos! 229 00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:07,990 - Yes! - Yeah! 230 00:09:08,025 --> 00:09:09,759 - Whoo! - Let's do it! 231 00:09:09,793 --> 00:09:12,094 Still doesn't change the fact that I'm wetting my bed 232 00:09:12,129 --> 00:09:15,298 because I'm homesick for Mommy. 233 00:09:15,332 --> 00:09:17,700 (loud dubstep music plays) 234 00:09:22,239 --> 00:09:24,006 Hello, my lovelies. 235 00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:27,243 I have playa gifts for you. 236 00:09:27,277 --> 00:09:29,512 Anniversary necklaces. 237 00:09:29,546 --> 00:09:31,881 Together, they symbolize your love. 238 00:09:31,915 --> 00:09:35,084 Wow! Roger, these are beautiful! 239 00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:36,853 Did you make them yourself? 240 00:09:36,887 --> 00:09:38,387 I went to Target myself. 241 00:09:38,422 --> 00:09:40,957 I told you, I want this to be special for you. 242 00:09:40,991 --> 00:09:43,092 Later, I'm cooking you a gourmet meal. 243 00:09:43,126 --> 00:09:45,094 Plus, I made you a sheet of acid. 244 00:09:45,128 --> 00:09:47,396 Each tab features a little alien saying, 245 00:09:47,431 --> 00:09:48,965 "Take me to your dealer." 246 00:09:48,999 --> 00:09:50,600 (chuckling) They usually say "leader," 247 00:09:50,634 --> 00:09:53,035 but this alien likes drugs. 248 00:09:55,439 --> 00:09:57,740 This is so thoughtful. 249 00:09:57,774 --> 00:09:59,842 This whole thing, it's just... 250 00:09:59,877 --> 00:10:01,310 too thoughtful. 251 00:10:01,345 --> 00:10:03,913 When has Roger ever done anything just to be nice? 252 00:10:03,947 --> 00:10:05,147 He always has an ulterior motive. 253 00:10:05,182 --> 00:10:07,016 Dude, that's true. 254 00:10:07,050 --> 00:10:10,119 Maybe these psychedelics will help us see through his plan. 255 00:10:10,153 --> 00:10:13,122 Jeff, no! Look, until we figure out what Roger's up to, 256 00:10:13,156 --> 00:10:15,725 we should do nothing, trust nothing... 257 00:10:15,759 --> 00:10:17,126 take nothing. 258 00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:19,729 Can I take a Benadryl if I get stung by a bee? 259 00:10:19,763 --> 00:10:21,430 Yes, Jeff, you can take that. 260 00:10:21,465 --> 00:10:23,466 What about Roger's homemade Benadryl? 261 00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,268 It's good that you're asking me about these things. 262 00:10:25,302 --> 00:10:26,769 No. 263 00:10:30,674 --> 00:10:32,475 What's that horrible music? 264 00:10:32,509 --> 00:10:33,843 It's called dubstep. 265 00:10:33,877 --> 00:10:36,846 It's the sound of living in your parents' basement forever. 266 00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,447 (laughing) 267 00:10:38,482 --> 00:10:40,850 Why are you being so uptight, Stan? 268 00:10:40,884 --> 00:10:42,418 Come hula-hoop with me! 269 00:10:42,452 --> 00:10:44,320 Is there another one?! 270 00:10:51,328 --> 00:10:52,528 (wind blowing) 271 00:10:52,562 --> 00:10:54,964 Oh, no! Roger's acid! 272 00:10:54,998 --> 00:10:58,634 Each of these things can make a full-grown man trip balls! 273 00:10:58,669 --> 00:11:02,338 Imagine what they'll do to a four-ounce goldfish! 274 00:11:04,107 --> 00:11:06,175 ...cracker? 275 00:11:06,209 --> 00:11:08,144 I think I'm "crackering" up! 276 00:11:08,178 --> 00:11:10,579 (canned laughter) 277 00:11:10,614 --> 00:11:12,081 (applause) 278 00:11:12,115 --> 00:11:14,383 (gasps) They're all here! 279 00:11:14,418 --> 00:11:16,986 Milanos, Chessmen... 280 00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:18,254 Pretzel Thins. 281 00:11:18,288 --> 00:11:19,455 (applause intensifies) 282 00:11:19,489 --> 00:11:21,624 Congratulations, Klaus. 283 00:11:21,658 --> 00:11:24,060 You're high as shit. 284 00:11:24,094 --> 00:11:26,529 285 00:11:29,533 --> 00:11:32,168 Okay, guys, I did a little panty raid recon 286 00:11:32,202 --> 00:11:33,536 on the girls' cabin. 287 00:11:33,570 --> 00:11:35,638 Actually, we're not doing the panty raid. 288 00:11:35,672 --> 00:11:36,672 W-Why not?! 289 00:11:36,707 --> 00:11:39,308 Well, we talked about it, and we get the sense 290 00:11:39,343 --> 00:11:41,510 that you're a pretty nerdy 14-year-old. 291 00:11:41,545 --> 00:11:43,879 But us, we're pretty cool 10-year-olds. 292 00:11:43,914 --> 00:11:46,549 I've kissed three girls this summer. 293 00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:50,419 So, we're feeling like we should avoid anything that you do. 294 00:11:50,454 --> 00:11:51,520 (sighs) 295 00:11:51,555 --> 00:11:54,023 Okay, first of all, Paul? 296 00:11:54,057 --> 00:11:55,358 [Bleep] you. 297 00:11:55,392 --> 00:11:57,927 (loud dubstep music plays) 298 00:11:57,961 --> 00:12:00,062 Whoa! Cool bed! 299 00:12:00,097 --> 00:12:02,398 I stress-tested this baby to four tons, 300 00:12:02,432 --> 00:12:04,233 so feel free to pound it out. 301 00:12:04,267 --> 00:12:06,268 Again, very thoughtful. 302 00:12:06,303 --> 00:12:07,803 The food looks delicious, too. 303 00:12:07,838 --> 00:12:10,239 Good... so you'll eat, then get nice and tired 304 00:12:10,273 --> 00:12:12,274 and sleep like the dead. 305 00:12:12,309 --> 00:12:14,710 What's that? It looks like... blood. 306 00:12:14,745 --> 00:12:16,245 (chuckles nervously) Must be mine. 307 00:12:16,279 --> 00:12:18,414 I mean, who else's would it be? 308 00:12:19,716 --> 00:12:21,317 Nope. One of those cocker spaniels 309 00:12:21,351 --> 00:12:23,019 must've had their period in here. 310 00:12:23,053 --> 00:12:25,521 Okay, you two, eat and sleep time! 311 00:12:27,624 --> 00:12:30,626 (crickets chirping and owl hooting) 312 00:12:32,763 --> 00:12:34,430 (whispering) Oh, this is awesome! 313 00:12:34,464 --> 00:12:36,065 You guys should've seen the Lil' Apaches. 314 00:12:36,099 --> 00:12:39,035 They were all like, "Can we please come with you, Steve? 315 00:12:39,069 --> 00:12:41,103 None of us have even kissed a girl." 316 00:12:41,138 --> 00:12:44,140 I heard Paul is plowing his way through Cabin 7. 317 00:12:44,174 --> 00:12:47,710 The point is I told them if I'ma do a panty raid, 318 00:12:47,744 --> 00:12:49,578 I'ma do it with my O.G.s... 319 00:12:49,613 --> 00:12:52,782 the younger, sleepier Mini Mohawks. 320 00:12:52,816 --> 00:12:54,550 This doesn't feel fun, 321 00:12:54,584 --> 00:12:56,218 what you're doing right now. 322 00:12:56,253 --> 00:12:57,987 It feels more desperate. 323 00:12:58,021 --> 00:12:59,622 (shouting) Desperate how?! 324 00:12:59,656 --> 00:13:02,324 Okay, so... we're gonna bounce. 325 00:13:02,359 --> 00:13:04,427 Just 'cause we're leaving 326 00:13:04,461 --> 00:13:07,763 doesn't mean we don't want you to get better. 327 00:13:07,798 --> 00:13:10,199 (loud dubstep music plays) 328 00:13:12,402 --> 00:13:13,669 Hey! Where's your glow? 329 00:13:13,703 --> 00:13:15,304 - Darktards! - (bicycle bell dings) 330 00:13:17,074 --> 00:13:19,375 All right, we need to figure out what Roger is up to. 331 00:13:19,409 --> 00:13:21,143 Klaus, are you okay? 332 00:13:21,178 --> 00:13:23,446 Oh, yeah, I'm cool. I'm cool. 333 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:24,880 I was just gonna cut my face off 334 00:13:24,915 --> 00:13:27,116 to let the shadow people out of my skull. 335 00:13:27,150 --> 00:13:28,751 So, the burritos are up for grabs? 336 00:13:28,785 --> 00:13:32,021 Burritos?! I'm marrying this young couple. 337 00:13:32,055 --> 00:13:34,523 (music continues) 338 00:13:36,393 --> 00:13:38,761 All right, I think I got something. 339 00:13:38,795 --> 00:13:40,830 Roger wrote down a phone number. 340 00:13:40,864 --> 00:13:44,333 Reverse lookup says it's a medical clinic in El Salvador. 341 00:13:44,367 --> 00:13:46,168 Hey, does this mean anything? 342 00:13:50,007 --> 00:13:52,007 _ 343 00:13:52,008 --> 00:13:53,442 Holy crap! 344 00:13:53,477 --> 00:13:55,444 Roger set this whole thing up to take our organs! 345 00:13:55,479 --> 00:13:57,146 Roger's evil! 346 00:13:57,180 --> 00:13:59,682 But you gotta give him a little credit for being so... 347 00:13:59,716 --> 00:14:02,151 organ... ized. 348 00:14:03,153 --> 00:14:05,354 (chuckling) There's that smile. 349 00:14:05,388 --> 00:14:07,857 350 00:14:07,891 --> 00:14:10,326 Bunch of 8-year-olds calling me nerdy. 351 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:12,862 Bunch of 6-year-olds calling me desperate. 352 00:14:12,896 --> 00:14:14,497 I don't need any of 'em. 353 00:14:14,531 --> 00:14:16,031 - Snot? - Gotcha. 354 00:14:16,066 --> 00:14:18,868 Don't you mean "Gotye"? 'Cause you're... 355 00:14:18,902 --> 00:14:22,104 Somebody that I used to know 356 00:14:22,139 --> 00:14:25,541 ANNOUNCER: "American Dad" remembers Gotye. 357 00:14:25,575 --> 00:14:26,942 I can't let you do this. 358 00:14:26,977 --> 00:14:28,878 Sure you can! You can do it with me! 359 00:14:28,912 --> 00:14:30,846 You don't think I wanna have fun? 360 00:14:30,881 --> 00:14:33,816 But if I have fun, sunscreen is not applied, 361 00:14:33,850 --> 00:14:35,851 friendship bracelets are poorly woven, 362 00:14:35,886 --> 00:14:39,655 and no one scratches Chief Danny's bug bites to completion! 363 00:14:39,689 --> 00:14:42,925 You know what? Forget it! I got panties to try on... 364 00:14:42,959 --> 00:14:44,660 Raid! To raid. 365 00:14:44,694 --> 00:14:46,162 Stop, Steve, or I'll... 366 00:14:46,196 --> 00:14:48,464 What? Blow your corked whistle? 367 00:14:51,067 --> 00:14:53,202 You wouldn't dare. 368 00:14:54,371 --> 00:14:55,738 (blowing whistle) 369 00:14:56,940 --> 00:14:59,441 C.I.T. Snot, you uncorked your whistle. 370 00:14:59,476 --> 00:15:01,076 This better be good. 371 00:15:01,111 --> 00:15:04,246 Camper Steve was about to commit... a panty raid. 372 00:15:04,281 --> 00:15:07,016 By himself? That's kind of a bummer. 373 00:15:07,050 --> 00:15:10,419 And also a clear violation of our no-bullying policy. 374 00:15:10,453 --> 00:15:11,587 I gotta send ya home. 375 00:15:11,621 --> 00:15:12,655 What?! 376 00:15:12,689 --> 00:15:13,989 I will, however, allow you 377 00:15:14,024 --> 00:15:16,926 to sing "Boom Chicka Boom" one last time. 378 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:17,954 But I... 379 00:15:17,954 --> 00:15:19,995 I said a-boom chicka-boom 380 00:15:20,030 --> 00:15:22,064 (sadly) I said a-boom chicka-boom 381 00:15:22,098 --> 00:15:23,999 I said a-boom chicka-boom 382 00:15:24,034 --> 00:15:26,101 (crying) I said a-boom chicka-boom 383 00:15:26,136 --> 00:15:29,538 I said a-boom chicka rocka chicka rocka chicka boom 384 00:15:29,573 --> 00:15:34,510 (sobbing) I said a-boom chicka rocka chicka rocka 385 00:15:34,544 --> 00:15:35,945 Chicka boom 386 00:15:39,016 --> 00:15:40,150 Gimme a Sprite. 387 00:15:40,184 --> 00:15:41,985 Get the hell out of my bar. 388 00:15:42,019 --> 00:15:44,955 Don't tell me... Sprite's only for counselors. 389 00:15:44,989 --> 00:15:46,189 (glass shatters) 390 00:15:46,224 --> 00:15:48,959 There's two things we don't like in this town... 391 00:15:48,993 --> 00:15:51,862 that lousy summer camp and Sprite. 392 00:15:51,896 --> 00:15:55,365 So, you can do the Dew, or you can be on your way. 393 00:15:55,399 --> 00:15:57,801 You don't have to tell me that camp sucks. 394 00:15:57,835 --> 00:15:59,069 It double-sucks. 395 00:15:59,103 --> 00:16:02,372 Hey, everybody, this kid's making a lot of sense over here. 396 00:16:02,406 --> 00:16:03,373 What'd he say, Meaux? 397 00:16:03,407 --> 00:16:07,310 He said that camp, and I quote, "double-sucks." 398 00:16:07,345 --> 00:16:08,979 Whoa! (chuckles) 399 00:16:09,013 --> 00:16:12,182 I never had the balls to push it that far, but he's right. 400 00:16:12,216 --> 00:16:14,150 They drive straight through our town 401 00:16:14,185 --> 00:16:15,785 to drop their bratty kids off. 402 00:16:15,820 --> 00:16:18,188 Never once stopping by to see what the mill's like. 403 00:16:18,222 --> 00:16:19,990 It's really cool in there. 404 00:16:20,024 --> 00:16:21,324 I bet it is. 405 00:16:21,359 --> 00:16:22,993 That dumb camp kicked me out 406 00:16:23,027 --> 00:16:24,895 'cause I wouldn't play by their rules. 407 00:16:24,929 --> 00:16:28,031 Now my life is garbage, just like you guys. 408 00:16:28,065 --> 00:16:29,866 - Yeah! - This kid gets us. 409 00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,868 Ah, I wish there were some way 410 00:16:31,903 --> 00:16:33,703 we could help ya get back at that camp... 411 00:16:33,738 --> 00:16:35,205 you know, since you're one of us. 412 00:16:35,239 --> 00:16:37,007 We could give him a tour of the mill. 413 00:16:37,041 --> 00:16:38,308 It's really cool in there. 414 00:16:38,342 --> 00:16:40,143 Yes. Maybe not today, 415 00:16:40,177 --> 00:16:42,479 but let's definitely get that on the books. 416 00:16:42,513 --> 00:16:45,248 In the meantime, I know just how you guys 417 00:16:45,283 --> 00:16:46,750 can help me get back at that camp. 418 00:16:46,784 --> 00:16:48,351 But before we get to that, 419 00:16:48,386 --> 00:16:51,721 which sushi roll would you recommend? 420 00:16:51,756 --> 00:16:54,157 (loud dubstep music plays) 421 00:16:57,895 --> 00:16:59,930 (singsong voice) Hayley. 422 00:16:59,964 --> 00:17:01,698 Jeff. 423 00:17:01,732 --> 00:17:03,300 Watermelon. 424 00:17:03,334 --> 00:17:04,601 Aha! Busted! 425 00:17:04,635 --> 00:17:06,236 Wait, what are you... Did you not sleep 426 00:17:06,270 --> 00:17:08,538 in the beautiful bed I put together for you? 427 00:17:08,573 --> 00:17:12,042 Nope, we've avoided everything you've done for us this weekend 428 00:17:12,076 --> 00:17:14,744 because we know you're harvesting organs! 429 00:17:14,779 --> 00:17:16,413 That cooler is probably full of 'em. 430 00:17:17,213 --> 00:17:19,482 This cooler... is filled... 431 00:17:19,517 --> 00:17:23,019 with fresh smoked salmon for your breakfast in bed! 432 00:17:24,989 --> 00:17:29,793 Man! For once in my life, I do something with absolutely no ulterior motive 433 00:17:29,827 --> 00:17:32,963 'cause, "Oh, it's supposed to make you feel so good!" 434 00:17:32,997 --> 00:17:33,964 Never again! 435 00:17:33,998 --> 00:17:36,199 So what's with the operating room in your attic? 436 00:17:36,233 --> 00:17:38,602 I was harvesting my own organs! 437 00:17:40,104 --> 00:17:42,405 How do you think I was planning to pay for all this? 438 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:45,108 Unfortunately, there's not much of a market for alien organs, 439 00:17:45,142 --> 00:17:47,277 so I'm going to have to put 'em back in. 440 00:17:47,311 --> 00:17:49,312 Or maybe not... I haven't noticed a single difference 441 00:17:49,347 --> 00:17:50,447 since I took them out. 442 00:17:50,481 --> 00:17:51,448 Oh, my God! 443 00:17:52,089 --> 00:17:54,484 Let's all go to the body 444 00:17:54,619 --> 00:17:57,287 Let's all go to the body 445 00:17:57,321 --> 00:18:00,457 Let's all go to the bodyyy 446 00:18:00,491 --> 00:18:02,792 We'll go in through the butt 447 00:18:02,827 --> 00:18:04,728 (organs chittering) 448 00:18:06,230 --> 00:18:08,031 (trills) 449 00:18:08,065 --> 00:18:09,633 (coughs) 450 00:18:09,667 --> 00:18:11,601 How long was I out? 451 00:18:11,636 --> 00:18:15,805 Jeff? Did you... take advantage of me? 452 00:18:17,041 --> 00:18:19,442 Looks like the counselors won't be stopping us, 453 00:18:19,477 --> 00:18:21,845 so let's have us a panty raid! 454 00:18:21,879 --> 00:18:23,480 Look, we're adults. 455 00:18:23,514 --> 00:18:25,315 If we go stealing little kids' panties, 456 00:18:25,349 --> 00:18:28,385 well, that's a list you don't wanna be on twice. 457 00:18:28,419 --> 00:18:31,154 ALL: (chanting) Raid, raid, raid! 458 00:18:31,188 --> 00:18:34,057 Whoa! You guys are motivated! Wait up! 459 00:18:34,091 --> 00:18:35,692 Steve! What are you doing?! 460 00:18:35,726 --> 00:18:37,594 Me and my new friends from town 461 00:18:37,628 --> 00:18:39,729 are teaching this camp some manners. 462 00:18:39,764 --> 00:18:43,333 (grunting and screaming) 463 00:18:43,367 --> 00:18:45,168 It looks more like a riot. 464 00:18:45,202 --> 00:18:46,936 (screaming) 465 00:18:46,971 --> 00:18:49,706 (intense classical music playing) 466 00:18:49,740 --> 00:18:51,541 - (screaming) - _ 467 00:18:51,575 --> 00:18:53,576 - (grunting) - _ 468 00:18:53,611 --> 00:18:56,079 We're free! 469 00:18:56,688 --> 00:18:59,610 This is gonna be my coffee table! 470 00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:05,488 Uh, guys, m-maybe we should have a quick pow-wow 471 00:19:05,523 --> 00:19:07,123 to review our objectives here. 472 00:19:07,158 --> 00:19:08,152 You're not our leader. 473 00:19:08,152 --> 00:19:10,293 You're just some kid that looks like Juno. 474 00:19:10,327 --> 00:19:13,263 Only from certain angles! Now calm down! 475 00:19:13,297 --> 00:19:15,665 You think you can tell us what to do? 476 00:19:15,700 --> 00:19:18,168 You'd... You'd kill me over this?! 477 00:19:18,202 --> 00:19:20,503 Would it please m'lady? (clears throat) 478 00:19:20,538 --> 00:19:22,706 Sorry. I meant "mill lady." 479 00:19:26,544 --> 00:19:27,577 Run, Steve! 480 00:19:27,611 --> 00:19:28,945 Get 'em! 481 00:19:28,979 --> 00:19:30,080 (crowd shouting) 482 00:19:40,958 --> 00:19:43,226 You can't tread water forever! 483 00:19:43,260 --> 00:19:44,794 Yeah, but we can do it for 20 minutes, 484 00:19:44,829 --> 00:19:46,896 or else we wouldn't have lake privileges! 485 00:19:46,931 --> 00:19:48,898 Townie huddle! 486 00:19:48,933 --> 00:19:50,600 - (muttering) - Privileges... 20 minutes... 487 00:19:50,634 --> 00:19:51,835 I know, I know. 488 00:19:51,869 --> 00:19:53,503 (muttering continues) 489 00:19:53,537 --> 00:19:56,439 Okay! Enjoy your swim party. 490 00:19:56,474 --> 00:19:57,607 We're gonna keep raiding. 491 00:19:57,641 --> 00:19:59,609 (crowd cheering and shouting) 492 00:20:00,377 --> 00:20:02,912 Sorry I brought hell into this camp. 493 00:20:02,947 --> 00:20:04,080 I was just mad at you 494 00:20:04,115 --> 00:20:06,483 because you were becoming a grown-up first, 495 00:20:06,517 --> 00:20:08,885 and it was... changing everything. 496 00:20:08,919 --> 00:20:10,787 No, Steve, I was wrong. 497 00:20:10,821 --> 00:20:14,324 I thought being a grown-up meant not having fun anymore. 498 00:20:14,358 --> 00:20:15,759 But look at them. 499 00:20:15,793 --> 00:20:17,994 Let me down, you townie scum! 500 00:20:18,028 --> 00:20:19,329 Whoo-hoo! 501 00:20:19,363 --> 00:20:21,131 Best day ever! 502 00:20:21,165 --> 00:20:22,599 They're having a ball! 503 00:20:22,633 --> 00:20:23,833 Exactly. 504 00:20:23,868 --> 00:20:26,302 No matter how grown up we get... 505 00:20:26,337 --> 00:20:28,605 We'll always be able to have fun. 506 00:20:28,639 --> 00:20:30,607 I think he's havin' a heart attack! 507 00:20:30,641 --> 00:20:32,108 (laughter) 508 00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:33,576 (factory whistle blows) 509 00:20:33,611 --> 00:20:34,744 Shift change! (chief whimpers) 510 00:20:34,779 --> 00:20:36,813 Time to get to work, fellas! 511 00:20:36,814 --> 00:20:38,814 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 512 00:20:42,319 --> 00:20:43,987 (eerie whooshing) 513 00:20:47,658 --> 00:20:49,325 (gasps) 514 00:20:49,360 --> 00:20:50,727 Yes. 515 00:20:50,761 --> 00:20:52,729 This body will do. 516 00:20:52,763 --> 00:20:55,699 Ew! Ew! I'm covered in ants! 517 00:20:55,749 --> 00:21:00,299 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36868

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