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[Orna]
Suddenly, like, the...
2
00:00:30,762 --> 00:00:34,178
enormity of their stories
just, like, is sitting with me-
3
00:00:34,178 --> 00:00:35,387
-[Virginia] Mm-hm.
-[Orna] Like, in a...
4
00:00:37,929 --> 00:00:40,345
I- I don't know, it feels
like I need a lot of...
5
00:00:40,345 --> 00:00:42,970
heart and head space
to kind of hold it all
6
00:00:42,970 --> 00:00:44,011
-and like-
-[Virginia] Absolutely.
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00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,720
[Orna] do something
with it, and...
8
00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:51,178
really overwhelming
sense of responsibility.
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00:00:55,428 --> 00:01:01,387
♪airy ambient
music♪
10
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[Orna] What are your
plans with the pregnancy?
11
00:01:38,011 --> 00:01:39,512
-I don't know.
-Yeah.
12
00:01:39,512 --> 00:01:40,970
I think we're gonna
wait a good while.
13
00:01:40,970 --> 00:01:41,929
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-Yeah.
14
00:01:41,929 --> 00:01:43,428
it's- it's gonna...
15
00:01:44,053 --> 00:01:45,470
it's gonna be a bit.
16
00:01:45,470 --> 00:01:46,136
I think we-
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00:01:46,136 --> 00:01:47,720
I think we wanna sit-
18
00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:48,970
[Orna]
Mm-hm.
19
00:01:48,970 --> 00:01:51,470
and enjoy
where we're at-
20
00:01:51,470 --> 00:01:52,470
-Just-
-for a little bit.
21
00:01:52,470 --> 00:01:53,595
Let the freakin' dust
settle. [laughs]
22
00:01:53,595 --> 00:01:55,470
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
23
00:01:55,470 --> 00:01:58,428
Yeah, and- and kind
of play it by ear.
24
00:01:59,303 --> 00:02:00,929
Where are you, Sarah?
25
00:02:01,553 --> 00:02:05,136
I think I'm still dealing
with, like, a little bit of...
26
00:02:06,845 --> 00:02:08,512
I don't even know,
honestly.
27
00:02:08,512 --> 00:02:10,720
Confliction, guilt,
28
00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:13,553
or feeling like I should
feel differently.
29
00:02:14,595 --> 00:02:15,762
[sniffs]
30
00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:20,428
[sighs]
31
00:02:20,428 --> 00:02:23,220
I think I just felt so much
conviction about it.
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00:02:23,220 --> 00:02:24,178
-Mm-hm.
-[Sarah] And I felt so ready.
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00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:25,095
And I felt...
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00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:27,679
like, uh...
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00:02:27,679 --> 00:02:29,261
[crying] it was all
gonna happen.
36
00:02:31,136 --> 00:02:33,470
And...this is great
where we're at,
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00:02:33,470 --> 00:02:36,178
I'm super-excited and
I'm super-proud of us
38
00:02:36,178 --> 00:02:37,845
-for doing this work.
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
39
00:02:37,845 --> 00:02:40,720
But it still feels a little
bit like loss, somehow.
40
00:02:40,720 --> 00:02:41,679
[Orna]
Of course.
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00:02:42,595 --> 00:02:43,970
[sniffs]
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00:02:43,970 --> 00:02:46,845
I think I am...
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00:02:46,845 --> 00:02:50,095
mourning this, uh-
[scoffs]
44
00:02:50,095 --> 00:02:53,428
like, heteronormative
way of getting pregnant?
45
00:02:53,428 --> 00:02:54,220
Yeah.
46
00:02:54,220 --> 00:02:55,261
And I don't think
I've ever felt
47
00:02:55,261 --> 00:02:56,637
-envy like that before.
-[Orna] Yeah.
48
00:02:56,637 --> 00:02:59,345
Where it's rage-
49
00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:01,512
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-but quieter. [laughs]
50
00:03:01,512 --> 00:03:02,720
And...
51
00:03:03,887 --> 00:03:05,970
-really ugly-
-[Orna] Yeah.
52
00:03:05,970 --> 00:03:07,345
-and really...
-[Orna] Yeah, a very
53
00:03:07,345 --> 00:03:08,053
particular color.
54
00:03:08,053 --> 00:03:09,553
-Uh-huh.
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
55
00:03:09,553 --> 00:03:10,970
Um-
[sighs]
56
00:03:10,970 --> 00:03:14,387
and I think I'm just mourning
that that's not an option-
57
00:03:14,387 --> 00:03:15,553
-[Orna] Yeah.
-for us.
58
00:03:15,553 --> 00:03:16,804
-Mm-hm.
-[Sarah] And I think,
59
00:03:16,804 --> 00:03:18,553
for so long,
I assumed...
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00:03:18,553 --> 00:03:20,470
-a hetero life-
-Mm-hm.
61
00:03:20,470 --> 00:03:21,553
[Sarah]
And, um...
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00:03:21,553 --> 00:03:23,679
that it would be this
sort of surprise of like,
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00:03:23,679 --> 00:03:25,345
"Oh, my god,
we got pregnant.
64
00:03:25,345 --> 00:03:26,387
-How did this happen?
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
65
00:03:26,387 --> 00:03:27,553
It's crazy."
[laughs]
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00:03:27,553 --> 00:03:31,679
Um, and just that
it has to be so...
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00:03:32,345 --> 00:03:34,387
-[Orna] Intentional.
-Intentional.
68
00:03:34,387 --> 00:03:35,762
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-I think that's-
69
00:03:35,762 --> 00:03:37,512
and- I- I love
intentionality.
70
00:03:37,512 --> 00:03:38,637
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-But this is the one thing
71
00:03:38,637 --> 00:03:39,553
that I'm like,
72
00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:41,470
-"Motherfucker- [laughs]
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
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00:03:41,470 --> 00:03:42,804
Why? Why this?
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00:03:42,804 --> 00:03:43,762
This sucks."
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00:03:43,762 --> 00:03:44,887
-Any- any-
-[Lauren] Yeah.
76
00:03:44,887 --> 00:03:46,261
thoughts? Reaction?
77
00:03:47,136 --> 00:03:49,470
I do feel a bit
of guilt
78
00:03:49,470 --> 00:03:50,720
in the relief...
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00:03:51,261 --> 00:03:52,887
in a certain way
that I have.
80
00:03:52,887 --> 00:03:55,595
Like, "Oh, like, now
we do get to, like,
81
00:03:55,595 --> 00:03:57,637
-have a little more time-
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
82
00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,053
here in this really...
83
00:03:59,470 --> 00:04:02,428
like, lovely time
period that we're in."
84
00:04:02,428 --> 00:04:03,887
We planned, like,
three trips-
85
00:04:03,887 --> 00:04:04,762
-[Lauren] Yeah.
-like, right after we found out
86
00:04:04,762 --> 00:04:06,053
-we didn't get pregnant.
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
87
00:04:06,053 --> 00:04:07,762
We were like, "Okay, so we're
going to Italy next summer."
88
00:04:07,762 --> 00:04:08,929
-[laughs] Like-
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
89
00:04:08,929 --> 00:04:09,887
Like, it's gonna be-
90
00:04:09,887 --> 00:04:11,387
like, I'm really
excited
91
00:04:11,387 --> 00:04:13,178
-for the next few years.
-I am, too.
92
00:04:13,178 --> 00:04:16,261
On the intentionality
piece of it,
93
00:04:16,261 --> 00:04:19,470
that doesnt really affect
me as much, I guess.
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00:04:19,929 --> 00:04:22,053
It's frustrating that
it's going to be, like,
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00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:24,845
a medical procedure that, like,
you're gonna have to go under.
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00:04:24,845 --> 00:04:26,929
And that's- that's
really scary.
97
00:04:26,929 --> 00:04:28,095
But...
98
00:04:28,553 --> 00:04:29,720
like, at the
same time,
99
00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:31,845
I felt like I've known
that for a really long time
100
00:04:31,845 --> 00:04:33,220
and I've
accepted it-
101
00:04:33,220 --> 00:04:34,470
Would you feel
differently, though,
102
00:04:34,470 --> 00:04:35,470
if it was your body?
103
00:04:36,428 --> 00:04:38,470
I mean, I've gone
through plenty of
104
00:04:38,470 --> 00:04:39,595
surgeries at
this point.
105
00:04:39,595 --> 00:04:41,929
I don't think it really
phases me anymore.
106
00:04:42,220 --> 00:04:44,428
At this point, I'm
kind of like,
107
00:04:44,428 --> 00:04:45,970
"Oh, that's part of
the journey."
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00:04:46,679 --> 00:04:47,637
[laughs]
You're right.
109
00:04:47,637 --> 00:04:48,970
[laughs] Like,
right, it's like,
110
00:04:48,970 --> 00:04:50,970
"Oh, major life change?
Surgery.
111
00:04:50,970 --> 00:04:51,845
-Yeah.
-You're gonna get-
112
00:04:51,845 --> 00:04:52,929
-Great!
-You're getting married?
113
00:04:52,929 --> 00:04:54,136
Oh, so you're going in
for surgery?" [laughs]
114
00:04:54,136 --> 00:04:55,637
Yeah, [laughs] I- I
assume there's some
115
00:04:55,637 --> 00:04:57,470
surgical component
of this.
116
00:04:57,470 --> 00:04:59,220
[laughter]
117
00:04:59,220 --> 00:05:00,011
Yeah.
118
00:05:00,011 --> 00:05:01,053
And now, we're
coming up
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00:05:01,053 --> 00:05:02,929
on two years of
marriage in January.
120
00:05:02,929 --> 00:05:03,970
Yeah.
121
00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:07,303
-And five years together.
-I know.
122
00:05:07,303 --> 00:05:08,762
-It's pretty good!
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
123
00:05:08,762 --> 00:05:09,887
That's not nothin'.
124
00:05:09,887 --> 00:05:11,470
-[Orna] That's not nothin'.
-No.
125
00:05:12,887 --> 00:05:17,428
♪soft emotional
music♪
126
00:05:21,512 --> 00:05:22,512
There's, like, this.
127
00:05:22,512 --> 00:05:24,345
[inaudible]
128
00:05:24,345 --> 00:05:27,428
♪♪♪
129
00:05:34,261 --> 00:05:35,345
Yeah, it's, like,
130
00:05:35,345 --> 00:05:37,512
humans aren't made
to live in New York.
131
00:05:37,512 --> 00:05:39,303
It does weird
things to you.
132
00:05:39,303 --> 00:05:41,303
You walk into the subway
and someone's, like,
133
00:05:41,303 --> 00:05:42,845
on the ground,
and, like,
134
00:05:42,845 --> 00:05:44,720
your first instinct is
to walk over them?
135
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:45,887
[Sarah]
I know.
136
00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:49,470
♪♪♪
137
00:05:57,470 --> 00:05:58,887
[Orna]
The kind of...
138
00:05:58,887 --> 00:06:02,387
dilemmas or conflicts
that couples have...
139
00:06:03,261 --> 00:06:05,679
-most of them, I relate to.
-[Virginia] Right.
140
00:06:11,428 --> 00:06:13,387
[Orna] I've been
on one side or...
141
00:06:13,387 --> 00:06:15,804
both sides of the
conflict myself.
142
00:06:17,261 --> 00:06:18,720
I mean most of the time
it doesnt feel like,
143
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,428
"Oh, I don't understand
what they're talking about."
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00:06:20,428 --> 00:06:22,887
I know what they're talking
about 'cause I've been there.
145
00:06:22,887 --> 00:06:26,303
♪♪♪
146
00:06:28,637 --> 00:06:29,845
[Orna] Do you...
147
00:06:30,679 --> 00:06:33,345
wish that Evelyn said...
148
00:06:34,303 --> 00:06:36,845
"I really wanna try
to work on this?"
149
00:06:38,845 --> 00:06:40,470
Yeah.
150
00:06:40,470 --> 00:06:42,637
[Orna] How would
you feel if she said,
151
00:06:42,637 --> 00:06:44,553
"I really wanna
work on this"?
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00:06:44,553 --> 00:06:47,095
I would be a 110 percent
willing to do that.
153
00:06:47,095 --> 00:06:48,428
[Orna]
Mm-hm.
154
00:06:50,845 --> 00:06:53,553
[Orna] I'm teetering back and
forth between feeling like,
155
00:06:53,553 --> 00:06:55,428
"Of course they
should break up-"
156
00:06:55,428 --> 00:06:56,553
[Virginia]
Yup.
157
00:06:56,553 --> 00:06:57,428
and feeling like,
158
00:06:57,428 --> 00:06:58,553
"What am I, crazy?
159
00:06:58,553 --> 00:06:59,637
-The- I- I- I-
-[Virginia] Mm.
160
00:06:59,637 --> 00:07:02,261
I should help them give
it another real try."
161
00:07:02,261 --> 00:07:03,387
A real shot.
162
00:07:03,387 --> 00:07:05,679
And why did
you feel...
163
00:07:05,679 --> 00:07:09,261
you shouldn't give up on them
when they were giving up?
164
00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,804
Because I felt like
they're both ambivalent
165
00:07:11,804 --> 00:07:14,387
and I was siding
with the giving up.
166
00:07:14,887 --> 00:07:17,762
I feel like I have a lot
of power over them.
167
00:07:17,762 --> 00:07:19,470
So, when I...
168
00:07:19,470 --> 00:07:21,887
orient towards...
169
00:07:21,887 --> 00:07:24,095
"Try it," they're
like, "Okay-
170
00:07:24,095 --> 00:07:25,428
-Yeah.
-We're going with you."
171
00:07:25,428 --> 00:07:26,762
-Yeah.
-Like, they're- they're like-
172
00:07:26,762 --> 00:07:27,762
Yeah.
173
00:07:28,261 --> 00:07:29,428
[Orna]
Um...
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00:07:29,428 --> 00:07:30,929
so that's a
little scary.
175
00:07:31,762 --> 00:07:34,303
You know, he took on the
role in the couple of, like,
176
00:07:34,303 --> 00:07:36,553
the one that hides
and conceals
177
00:07:36,553 --> 00:07:38,762
-and is kind of evasive.
-[Virginia] Yeah.
178
00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:41,553
[Orna] Because he always
feels like he's failing her.
179
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:45,887
She didn't understand
his resentment until
180
00:07:45,887 --> 00:07:49,428
he was able to
finally say to her...
181
00:07:49,428 --> 00:07:53,929
how much he is working
to please her.
182
00:07:54,804 --> 00:07:57,428
I think that made
a change for her.
183
00:07:58,595 --> 00:08:02,428
So, I don't know how
this is gonna play out.
184
00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:15,929
-[Orna] Hi.
-[both] Hi.
185
00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:17,637
[laughs]
186
00:08:21,679 --> 00:08:22,929
[Orna]
How are you two?
187
00:08:26,011 --> 00:08:27,053
-Good.
-We're good.
188
00:08:27,053 --> 00:08:28,720
We've been
communicating more.
189
00:08:28,720 --> 00:08:29,970
We've been, um-
190
00:08:30,428 --> 00:08:33,011
like, we try to meditate
as often as possible.
191
00:08:33,011 --> 00:08:34,512
-[Orna] You do?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
192
00:08:34,512 --> 00:08:35,387
-To get, yeah-
-We've been- we've been-
193
00:08:35,387 --> 00:08:37,303
she got me into it.
194
00:08:37,303 --> 00:08:38,553
-[Orna] Oh!
-Yeah. [laughs]
195
00:08:38,553 --> 00:08:40,679
And we've been,
um...
196
00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:42,595
doing it together.
197
00:08:42,595 --> 00:08:43,637
Yeah.
198
00:08:43,637 --> 00:08:45,220
[Alan] So, we've been,
like, following, like,
199
00:08:45,220 --> 00:08:46,929
kind of like a
reprogramming kind of it-
200
00:08:46,929 --> 00:08:48,929
-Breaking the patterns of-
-Yeah, breaking patterns
201
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:50,720
and trying to, like...
202
00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:51,887
kind of like move-
203
00:08:51,887 --> 00:08:53,762
like, "let go of
the past," like...
204
00:08:53,762 --> 00:08:54,887
kind of stuff.
205
00:08:54,887 --> 00:08:56,136
-Just trying to-
-Try- trying to break
206
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:57,303
bad habits-
[laughter]
207
00:08:57,303 --> 00:08:58,720
-Wow.
-[Alan] that, yeah, may be
208
00:08:58,720 --> 00:08:59,970
affecting us.
209
00:09:01,387 --> 00:09:02,804
I, uh...
210
00:09:02,804 --> 00:09:05,178
I feel like what
you mentioned...
211
00:09:05,178 --> 00:09:06,679
last week about...
212
00:09:07,303 --> 00:09:08,804
the difference in
our approaches.
213
00:09:08,804 --> 00:09:09,887
Like...
214
00:09:09,887 --> 00:09:12,553
what she's trying
to build on, I'm-
215
00:09:12,553 --> 00:09:14,095
I'm going reverse or-
216
00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,637
-Mm-hm.
-[Alan] doing this dance
217
00:09:15,637 --> 00:09:16,845
-and I was like-
-Yeah.
218
00:09:17,220 --> 00:09:19,178
You know, I think
I had just...
219
00:09:19,178 --> 00:09:20,261
helped me...
220
00:09:20,261 --> 00:09:21,637
step back and reflect.
221
00:09:21,637 --> 00:09:23,929
And, like, you know, putting
myself in the very position
222
00:09:23,929 --> 00:09:26,679
that I don't want to be in
by the way I'm doing things.
223
00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:28,387
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-So-
224
00:09:28,387 --> 00:09:29,720
Meaning you're
weakening
225
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:30,887
-the relationship.
-[Alan] Correct.
226
00:09:30,887 --> 00:09:32,804
And then, you're looking
at it and you're saying,
227
00:09:32,804 --> 00:09:34,011
"It looks weak."
228
00:09:34,011 --> 00:09:34,762
[Alan]
Yeah.
229
00:09:34,762 --> 00:09:36,804
And, like,
it's just, like...
230
00:09:36,804 --> 00:09:37,762
you know, a-
231
00:09:37,762 --> 00:09:39,345
-a vicious cycle-
-Mm-hm.
232
00:09:39,345 --> 00:09:40,428
where it's like
I'm never-
233
00:09:40,428 --> 00:09:41,261
-"I can't trust it."
-[Alan] Yeah.
234
00:09:41,261 --> 00:09:42,470
I'm not even-
235
00:09:42,470 --> 00:09:44,553
So, I'm not even giving
her an opportunity...
236
00:09:44,553 --> 00:09:45,720
-or for us to, like-
-[Orna] Yes.
237
00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:47,720
-get something right-
-[Orna] Yes.
238
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,470
-because I'm so standoffish-
-[Orna] Right.
239
00:09:49,470 --> 00:09:50,679
about the way
things have been.
240
00:09:50,679 --> 00:09:52,261
That's big.
241
00:09:52,261 --> 00:09:53,762
-So-
-No, that's huge.
242
00:09:53,762 --> 00:09:54,595
-Um-
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
243
00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:55,845
I've noticed
the change
244
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:58,345
even in him from
last week.
245
00:09:58,345 --> 00:09:59,470
Just-
246
00:10:00,470 --> 00:10:03,553
you know, just him
being more open to...
247
00:10:04,303 --> 00:10:06,512
like, listening
to me, and...
248
00:10:07,095 --> 00:10:09,595
I don't think he
realized, like, how-
249
00:10:09,970 --> 00:10:12,136
how that was
really happening.
250
00:10:12,136 --> 00:10:13,553
[Orna] Ho-
how guarded-
251
00:10:13,553 --> 00:10:14,845
-How guarded he was.
-[Orna] Alans been, yeah.
252
00:10:14,845 --> 00:10:16,553
Yeah- no, no, I-
253
00:10:16,553 --> 00:10:17,804
-You know-
-I didn't. I just-
254
00:10:17,804 --> 00:10:19,136
-Yeah.
-It's- it's almost like I put
255
00:10:19,136 --> 00:10:20,178
-blame on her-
-[Orna] Yeah.
256
00:10:20,178 --> 00:10:21,637
and I've been, like,
defensive towards her.
257
00:10:21,637 --> 00:10:22,595
So almost like...
258
00:10:22,595 --> 00:10:24,970
I- maybe in...
some ways
259
00:10:24,970 --> 00:10:26,387
I felt like I made
up my mind.
260
00:10:26,387 --> 00:10:27,762
Like, maybe I didn't
want to go.
261
00:10:28,428 --> 00:10:29,762
I didn't want
to save...
262
00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:31,345
-the relationship.
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
263
00:10:31,345 --> 00:10:32,970
J- it's the same
thing with me,
264
00:10:32,970 --> 00:10:34,303
-you know?
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
265
00:10:34,303 --> 00:10:36,970
Whenever I would feel like
anything had to do with trust,
266
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,970
I would go back
and think about
267
00:10:38,970 --> 00:10:42,095
the times that he's done
these things to me where...
268
00:10:42,095 --> 00:10:43,220
I felt like,
269
00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:45,512
"Well, this is an example
of why I can't trust you.
270
00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:47,011
Like, out of all
these things,"
271
00:10:47,011 --> 00:10:48,303
-you know.
-[Orna] Mm-hm. Yeah.
272
00:10:48,303 --> 00:10:50,345
[Evelyn] Not realizing that
I'm actually triggering Alan
273
00:10:50,345 --> 00:10:52,470
to, like, more stress.
274
00:10:52,470 --> 00:10:54,470
You know, I do...
275
00:10:55,136 --> 00:10:57,053
want us to move
forward and I-
276
00:10:57,053 --> 00:10:59,011
You know, I would
like to take things...
277
00:10:59,512 --> 00:11:01,178
a step at a time.
278
00:11:02,345 --> 00:11:04,845
Like, I- I just don't want
to make any more...
279
00:11:04,845 --> 00:11:06,303
rash decisions...
280
00:11:06,303 --> 00:11:07,345
with us...
281
00:11:08,929 --> 00:11:09,762
anymore.
282
00:11:11,428 --> 00:11:12,679
[Evelyn]
Neither do I.
283
00:11:17,512 --> 00:11:18,970
I love you.
You know that.
284
00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:23,845
-I'm learning more about that.
-[laughs]
285
00:11:31,637 --> 00:11:35,887
♪slow acoustic
strumming♪
286
00:11:48,887 --> 00:11:50,845
[Orna] People do
better with the truth
287
00:11:50,845 --> 00:11:52,011
than without it.
288
00:11:54,220 --> 00:11:57,387
People underestimate
themselves and...
289
00:11:57,387 --> 00:12:00,303
spend unnecessary energy
protecting themselves
290
00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:01,887
from truths
291
00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,720
that they fear
will kill them.
292
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,470
And actually will make
them stronger
293
00:12:05,470 --> 00:12:07,345
and make them
happier.
294
00:12:07,345 --> 00:12:11,261
♪♪♪
295
00:12:23,595 --> 00:12:25,595
People want
to do better.
296
00:12:29,428 --> 00:12:32,762
It's not very difficult to
find underneath the...
297
00:12:32,762 --> 00:12:34,345
heavy...
298
00:12:34,345 --> 00:12:36,970
crust of, like, resentment
and fight to-
299
00:12:36,970 --> 00:12:38,345
to find...
300
00:12:38,345 --> 00:12:40,428
the wish to repair and
the wish to love.
301
00:12:40,428 --> 00:12:43,720
♪♪♪
302
00:12:48,220 --> 00:12:50,553
[Virginia] We're very highly
confident when people come
303
00:12:50,553 --> 00:12:51,804
and sit down on
that couch
304
00:12:51,804 --> 00:12:54,637
that between all our techniques
and our life of wisdom...
305
00:12:54,637 --> 00:12:56,095
[Orna] We can find
the solution.
306
00:12:56,095 --> 00:12:57,428
[Virginia] Yeah, we could
find the solutions, but-
307
00:12:57,428 --> 00:12:58,762
-[Orna] It's not always true.
-not always.
308
00:12:58,762 --> 00:12:59,887
-[Orna] Yeah.
-Absolutely, not always.
309
00:12:59,887 --> 00:13:00,720
[Orna]
Yeah.
310
00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:03,512
Couples come to
us, almost always,
311
00:13:03,512 --> 00:13:05,679
when they're in the
middle of a crisis.
312
00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:08,970
There- so, there is a sense of
emergency and urgency.
313
00:13:08,970 --> 00:13:11,929
With individuals, you
don't have the feeling
314
00:13:11,929 --> 00:13:13,929
like "If I don't get
this right now-
315
00:13:13,929 --> 00:13:14,929
-Mm-hm.
-[Virginia] there'll be
316
00:13:14,929 --> 00:13:15,804
a catastrophe."
317
00:13:15,804 --> 00:13:17,595
But that's not true in
couples work.
318
00:13:17,595 --> 00:13:18,887
If I don't get that
right now,
319
00:13:18,887 --> 00:13:20,804
-there could be a catastrophe.
-Right.
320
00:13:20,804 --> 00:13:22,470
[Virginia] They could break
up when they shouldn't-
321
00:13:22,470 --> 00:13:23,553
Right. Right.
322
00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:24,553
[Virginia] Because I
wasn't fast enough
323
00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:26,387
to see a certain
something.
324
00:13:26,387 --> 00:13:28,553
You know, one couple
dropped out?
325
00:13:28,553 --> 00:13:30,220
Annie and Mau?
326
00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:32,679
♪groovy
music♪
327
00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:34,011
[Annie] "Cardigans
for your comfort."
328
00:13:34,011 --> 00:13:34,887
That should be, um-
329
00:13:34,887 --> 00:13:37,136
that should be a-
a thing. [laughs]
330
00:13:37,136 --> 00:13:39,512
[Orna] When they
decided to quit early, it-
331
00:13:39,512 --> 00:13:41,387
it was like a continuation
of how I felt
332
00:13:41,387 --> 00:13:43,053
with them all along.
333
00:13:43,053 --> 00:13:44,095
Which is...
334
00:13:44,095 --> 00:13:46,887
always one step
behind.
335
00:13:46,887 --> 00:13:48,178
They're- they're...
336
00:13:48,178 --> 00:13:49,178
symbiotic.
337
00:13:49,178 --> 00:13:51,345
They complete each
others sentences.
338
00:13:51,345 --> 00:13:53,804
They don't have to
even say one word
339
00:13:53,804 --> 00:13:55,970
and they know what
each other are thinking.
340
00:13:55,970 --> 00:13:57,637
They've already had
an argument,
341
00:13:57,637 --> 00:14:00,053
like, the whole argument,
in two words.
342
00:14:00,053 --> 00:14:00,970
And I'm like,
343
00:14:00,970 --> 00:14:02,762
"What just happened?"
[laughs]
344
00:14:02,762 --> 00:14:04,970
Can the two of you
explain that to me?
345
00:14:06,762 --> 00:14:08,553
-[Annie] No.
-[laughs]
346
00:14:10,512 --> 00:14:11,387
Wh-...
347
00:14:12,303 --> 00:14:13,387
No.
348
00:14:14,887 --> 00:14:16,428
[Orna] If she really
wanted to leave,
349
00:14:16,428 --> 00:14:17,804
she doesnt need
his permission.
350
00:14:17,804 --> 00:14:19,387
She doesnt need
him to understand
351
00:14:19,387 --> 00:14:21,470
that she needs to leave.
She would just leave.
352
00:14:21,470 --> 00:14:23,804
♪♪♪
353
00:14:23,804 --> 00:14:26,679
It's funny because it looks
like he has so much control,
354
00:14:26,679 --> 00:14:27,887
right?
Hes so...
355
00:14:27,887 --> 00:14:29,887
domineering on
the surface.
356
00:14:29,887 --> 00:14:32,887
But she has all the power
in there to decide.
357
00:14:32,887 --> 00:14:36,637
♪♪♪
358
00:14:37,428 --> 00:14:40,345
And it's up to her whether she's
gonna grow in the relationship,
359
00:14:40,345 --> 00:14:41,970
or if she's gonna
have to, like...
360
00:14:41,970 --> 00:14:42,887
break out.
361
00:14:42,887 --> 00:14:46,011
♪♪♪
362
00:14:55,762 --> 00:15:00,845
♪quiet emotional
music♪
363
00:15:07,679 --> 00:15:09,887
You know, your
partner always...
364
00:15:09,887 --> 00:15:11,845
pauses a certain
challenge to you
365
00:15:11,845 --> 00:15:13,095
of, like...
366
00:15:13,095 --> 00:15:15,512
there's another way
of seeing things.
367
00:15:15,512 --> 00:15:18,220
♪♪♪
368
00:15:19,095 --> 00:15:21,595
But tha- that's like
a constant irritant.
369
00:15:26,095 --> 00:15:28,720
Accumulating a long
history with someone,
370
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,845
like, really
knowing them...
371
00:15:30,845 --> 00:15:34,845
and finding a way to
continue loving them...
372
00:15:34,845 --> 00:15:36,595
despite whatever
comes your way
373
00:15:36,595 --> 00:15:37,804
that might...
374
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:39,804
make it difficult
for you.
375
00:15:39,804 --> 00:15:43,053
I mean, there's enormous
growth and beauty in that.
376
00:15:43,053 --> 00:15:48,095
♪♪♪
377
00:15:59,595 --> 00:16:00,720
-Hello.
-[unintelligible]
378
00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:02,178
[Elaine]
How are you?
379
00:16:02,637 --> 00:16:03,762
-[Desean] Hey.
-[Orna] Hi.
380
00:16:03,762 --> 00:16:04,970
[Elaine]
[unintelligible]
381
00:16:09,470 --> 00:16:11,762
I never told you
something, actually,
382
00:16:11,762 --> 00:16:14,011
when Desean
and I met.
383
00:16:14,011 --> 00:16:15,303
We work together.
384
00:16:16,053 --> 00:16:17,428
And...
385
00:16:17,428 --> 00:16:19,428
someone at the job
was telling me
386
00:16:19,428 --> 00:16:20,929
how cute Desean was.
387
00:16:21,845 --> 00:16:22,970
And...
388
00:16:22,970 --> 00:16:24,512
I was like,
"Oh, my god, yeah,
389
00:16:24,512 --> 00:16:25,679
he's so good-looking."
390
00:16:26,470 --> 00:16:27,929
And, um...
391
00:16:27,929 --> 00:16:29,011
we met.
392
00:16:29,011 --> 00:16:31,470
And I felt...
393
00:16:31,470 --> 00:16:33,720
like, this thing in
my stomach
394
00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:36,303
and this whole
reaction...
395
00:16:37,178 --> 00:16:38,512
-to me.
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
396
00:16:38,512 --> 00:16:40,804
[Elaine] And I was
like, "Oh, my god"
397
00:16:40,804 --> 00:16:41,970
-in my head.
-Mm-hm.
398
00:16:41,970 --> 00:16:43,512
At the time,
I was married.
399
00:16:43,512 --> 00:16:44,345
[Orna]
Mm-hm.
400
00:16:44,345 --> 00:16:46,929
I went home to my
then-husband.
401
00:16:46,929 --> 00:16:49,345
I was like, "I met
this guy.
402
00:16:49,345 --> 00:16:51,387
Oh, my goodness,
he's so great
403
00:16:51,387 --> 00:16:53,011
and he's so fanta-..."
404
00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:54,053
Not-
405
00:16:54,053 --> 00:16:54,720
-not realizing-
-[Orna] Not knowing
406
00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:55,845
what you're saying.
407
00:16:55,845 --> 00:16:56,887
Not be- but it wa-
408
00:16:56,887 --> 00:17:00,011
it just struck me
the way that it did.
409
00:17:00,011 --> 00:17:02,220
It wasn't like, "Oh, my god,
I'm gonna marry him."
410
00:17:02,220 --> 00:17:03,595
That- that- it
was just here-
411
00:17:03,595 --> 00:17:05,387
I...felt him.
412
00:17:05,804 --> 00:17:08,220
And, uh, so
I need to...
413
00:17:09,220 --> 00:17:11,553
m- make that a
constant for me.
414
00:17:13,637 --> 00:17:15,178
How are you doing?
415
00:17:15,512 --> 00:17:18,470
She is very in-tune
with...me.
416
00:17:18,470 --> 00:17:19,220
[Orna]
Mm-hm.
417
00:17:19,220 --> 00:17:20,512
But the funny
thing is...
418
00:17:20,512 --> 00:17:23,387
I- I don't understand
why we...
419
00:17:23,387 --> 00:17:26,553
constantly get into
the disagreements
420
00:17:26,553 --> 00:17:27,387
-or these ar-
-Well, I-
421
00:17:27,387 --> 00:17:28,762
I have some thoughts
about it.
422
00:17:28,762 --> 00:17:30,845
But I'm actually more
curious to know
423
00:17:30,845 --> 00:17:31,970
what do you
guys think?
424
00:17:31,970 --> 00:17:34,470
I mean, based on
what we've done here...
425
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:37,387
It comes from
the lack of trust.
426
00:17:37,679 --> 00:17:39,887
Not really y-
427
00:17:39,887 --> 00:17:40,720
[Orna] From your
lack of trust.
428
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:41,637
Correct.
429
00:17:41,637 --> 00:17:43,762
Not really toward you,
430
00:17:43,762 --> 00:17:45,470
but just in general.
431
00:17:45,470 --> 00:17:46,595
And so, like
she said,
432
00:17:46,595 --> 00:17:48,011
my- my-
433
00:17:48,011 --> 00:17:51,053
my pictures are painted
with these colors.
434
00:17:51,053 --> 00:17:52,595
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-Right?
435
00:17:52,595 --> 00:17:53,470
And so-
436
00:17:53,470 --> 00:17:54,970
but I've developed
new colors.
437
00:17:54,970 --> 00:17:56,512
So, I'm excited
about that.
438
00:17:56,512 --> 00:17:57,929
But the part that
is yours, yes,
439
00:17:57,929 --> 00:17:59,762
it has to do with
your mistrust.
440
00:17:59,762 --> 00:18:00,679
[Elaine]
Mm-hm.
441
00:18:00,679 --> 00:18:02,595
And that you
project that on.
442
00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:04,720
[clears throat]
443
00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:06,011
But there's a part
that is yours, Desean,
444
00:18:06,011 --> 00:18:08,887
that we'r- we didn't
do enough work with.
445
00:18:09,261 --> 00:18:10,470
You are...
446
00:18:10,470 --> 00:18:13,512
extremely, full-heartedly
committed...
447
00:18:13,804 --> 00:18:14,929
-to Elaine, right?
-Yes.
448
00:18:14,929 --> 00:18:16,762
[Orna] You're there.
You're solid.
449
00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:17,887
-You're- you're there.
-Yeah.
450
00:18:18,136 --> 00:18:20,929
[Orna] But you have
parts of you that are...
451
00:18:20,929 --> 00:18:22,553
more tucked away-
452
00:18:22,553 --> 00:18:23,512
[Desean]
Yeah.
453
00:18:23,512 --> 00:18:25,804
The way you kind of
manage your anger.
454
00:18:26,303 --> 00:18:28,428
And it comes out,
it leaks out
455
00:18:28,428 --> 00:18:30,428
in all sorts
of ways...
456
00:18:30,887 --> 00:18:32,428
that...
457
00:18:32,428 --> 00:18:34,345
-trigger, Elaine.
-Yeah.
458
00:18:34,345 --> 00:18:37,011
[Orna] So, it's not just
Elaine's projections.
459
00:18:37,011 --> 00:18:38,345
-Hmm.
-[Orna] It- it's parts of you
460
00:18:38,345 --> 00:18:40,929
that you don't...
completely own...
461
00:18:42,553 --> 00:18:45,220
that have the affect
on the two of you, too.
462
00:18:46,428 --> 00:18:48,053
Coming into this...
463
00:18:48,470 --> 00:18:49,595
I-
464
00:18:49,595 --> 00:18:50,595
I wanted-
465
00:18:50,595 --> 00:18:53,095
I wanted us to have
this- this therapy.
466
00:18:53,095 --> 00:18:54,845
But I wanted it
more for you, right?
467
00:18:54,845 --> 00:18:57,428
I felt, coming
into this...
468
00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:59,887
I- I don't have,
you know,
469
00:18:59,887 --> 00:19:02,679
major issues and
it's all her and...
470
00:19:02,679 --> 00:19:04,553
she'll see once we
get in there and-
471
00:19:04,553 --> 00:19:05,553
-[Orna] Mm-hm.
-we start talking about
472
00:19:05,553 --> 00:19:07,178
this stuff.
But...
473
00:19:07,178 --> 00:19:11,011
there was a- a major
turning point for me
474
00:19:11,011 --> 00:19:13,470
that, uh...
475
00:19:13,470 --> 00:19:15,345
allowed me to...
476
00:19:15,345 --> 00:19:18,470
get rid of all
of the, um...
477
00:19:20,387 --> 00:19:21,887
the resentment
and- and...
478
00:19:21,887 --> 00:19:25,387
ill will that
I came in...
479
00:19:25,387 --> 00:19:27,512
um, for her.
480
00:19:27,512 --> 00:19:29,387
-Damn. Ill will.
-Uh, uh, it was-
481
00:19:29,387 --> 00:19:32,845
it- yeah, it- it was
at one point where...
482
00:19:32,845 --> 00:19:36,095
just one day before,
I was ready to...
483
00:19:36,095 --> 00:19:38,512
call it quits and
"I'm done."
484
00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,345
And then, the
next day,
485
00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:42,720
through, you know,
the sessions,
486
00:19:43,136 --> 00:19:43,970
um...
487
00:19:43,970 --> 00:19:45,970
I had this sort of...
488
00:19:46,220 --> 00:19:47,929
realization that...
489
00:19:47,929 --> 00:19:49,720
I said to her-
I said to her-
490
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:51,970
I said, "You need to
listen to me right now.
491
00:19:51,970 --> 00:19:54,261
You- the- the words that are
about to come out of my mouth,
492
00:19:54,261 --> 00:19:56,512
you- you need to
really listen."
493
00:19:56,512 --> 00:20:00,053
And- and it had to do
with her trusting me.
494
00:20:00,553 --> 00:20:03,845
And letting her
know that I...
495
00:20:03,845 --> 00:20:04,845
got you.
496
00:20:04,845 --> 00:20:05,970
And I'm- yeah,
I'm-
497
00:20:05,970 --> 00:20:07,929
So, you know,
I'm gonna leave...
498
00:20:07,929 --> 00:20:09,595
you know, um...
499
00:20:10,178 --> 00:20:13,261
going forward with
the feeling that...
500
00:20:13,553 --> 00:20:15,512
we're unbreakable,
you know.
501
00:20:15,512 --> 00:20:17,011
-Nothing can come between us.
-[laughs]
502
00:20:17,011 --> 00:20:18,178
It's, you know...
503
00:20:18,178 --> 00:20:20,011
And that's a good
place to be.
504
00:20:20,011 --> 00:20:21,345
[Orna]
Mm-hm.
505
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:22,553
Yeah.
506
00:20:23,011 --> 00:20:27,929
♪soft emotional
music♪
507
00:20:38,011 --> 00:20:40,053
[Orna] I mean, sometimes
you get to witness people
508
00:20:40,053 --> 00:20:41,428
just really...
509
00:20:42,095 --> 00:20:43,345
transcend.
510
00:20:45,178 --> 00:20:47,595
Like they- they just
kind of...
511
00:20:47,595 --> 00:20:49,136
you know, phoenix rising.
512
00:20:49,136 --> 00:20:51,679
That they just find this,
like, incredible spirit
513
00:20:51,679 --> 00:20:52,720
and they...
514
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:55,595
do better than the cards
they were dealt.
515
00:20:55,595 --> 00:21:00,345
♪♪♪
516
00:21:04,804 --> 00:21:05,470
[Alan]
Bye.
517
00:21:05,470 --> 00:21:10,470
♪♪♪
518
00:21:14,220 --> 00:21:16,136
-Take care.
-[Orna] Take care.
519
00:21:16,595 --> 00:21:17,804
Thank you so much.
520
00:21:17,804 --> 00:21:22,595
♪♪♪
521
00:21:30,303 --> 00:21:31,220
[sighs]
522
00:21:34,553 --> 00:21:35,387
[kiss]
523
00:21:36,136 --> 00:21:37,095
[kiss]
524
00:21:37,804 --> 00:21:39,261
-[Elaine] [laughs]
-Thank you so much.
525
00:21:39,261 --> 00:21:41,136
Appreciate everything
youve done for us.
526
00:21:41,762 --> 00:21:43,637
Thank you so much.
527
00:21:44,512 --> 00:21:45,762
I appreciate you.
528
00:21:45,762 --> 00:21:46,720
Thank you.
529
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,095
I appreciate you
sincerely.
530
00:21:48,095 --> 00:21:49,178
Thank you.
531
00:21:49,178 --> 00:21:54,011
♪♪♪
532
00:22:20,011 --> 00:22:22,720
[Orna] We know each other.
We care about each other.
533
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:23,512
[Virginia]
Yeah.
534
00:22:24,887 --> 00:22:27,679
[Orna] But we know that
this relationship is not...
535
00:22:28,011 --> 00:22:31,053
gonna be there later
once it's over.
536
00:22:32,929 --> 00:22:36,387
You have to say goodbye
and- and you have no...
537
00:22:36,387 --> 00:22:37,387
claim.
538
00:22:39,512 --> 00:22:41,011
That they go on
with their lives.
539
00:22:41,011 --> 00:22:41,804
[Virginia]
Yeah.
540
00:22:41,804 --> 00:22:42,929
And I'm like-
541
00:22:43,428 --> 00:22:44,512
-I'm left with-
-[Virginia] Well-
542
00:22:44,512 --> 00:22:45,595
a none-
543
00:22:45,595 --> 00:22:47,845
-[Virginia] Yeah.
-with a void that they leave.
544
00:22:48,178 --> 00:22:49,220
[Virginia]
Yeah.
545
00:22:49,220 --> 00:22:51,679
you will turn out
to be another thing
546
00:22:51,679 --> 00:22:53,428
that happened
in their lives.
547
00:22:53,428 --> 00:22:54,011
Yeah.
548
00:22:54,011 --> 00:22:55,303
And they are...
549
00:22:55,303 --> 00:22:57,929
-the whole and only thing.
-Yes.
550
00:22:57,929 --> 00:22:59,845
-[Virginia] That was it.
-Yeah.
551
00:22:59,845 --> 00:23:00,553
Yeah.
552
00:23:05,178 --> 00:23:07,553
It's such a bizarre
profession.
553
00:23:09,178 --> 00:23:11,512
So bizarre.
[scoffs]
554
00:23:11,512 --> 00:23:12,303
[Virginia]
Mm-hm.
555
00:23:12,303 --> 00:23:17,220
♪airy
synths♪
556
00:23:17,220 --> 00:23:18,887
-Hi.
-[Adeline] Adeline.
557
00:23:18,887 --> 00:23:19,845
Chris.
558
00:23:21,428 --> 00:23:22,929
-Hi.
-Hi.
559
00:23:24,762 --> 00:23:25,929
-Hi.
-Hi.
560
00:23:26,887 --> 00:23:27,929
[Jessica] Hi,
I'm Jessica.
561
00:23:27,929 --> 00:23:30,095
-Jessica.
-[Jessica] Pleased to meet you.
562
00:23:30,095 --> 00:23:31,345
Aww.
563
00:23:33,428 --> 00:23:34,428
-Hello.
-Hi.
564
00:23:34,428 --> 00:23:35,345
-[laughs] Hi.
-How are you?
565
00:23:35,345 --> 00:23:36,428
-Hi.
-Hi.
566
00:23:36,428 --> 00:23:37,428
Christine, Aaron?
567
00:23:37,428 --> 00:23:38,053
-Yeah.
-Yes.
568
00:23:38,053 --> 00:23:39,053
[Orna]
Come in.
569
00:23:41,512 --> 00:23:43,595
-[Christine] How are you?
-[Orna] Hi, I'm Orna.
570
00:23:44,553 --> 00:23:46,011
So...
571
00:23:47,136 --> 00:23:48,553
talk to me.
572
00:23:49,804 --> 00:23:52,428
♪I'm just
noise♪
573
00:23:52,970 --> 00:23:55,595
♪To your finely
pierced ears♪
574
00:23:56,929 --> 00:24:01,637
♪Oh I'm just the other thing
that once brought you to tears♪
575
00:24:04,261 --> 00:24:08,470
♪You wanted me to love
you now you got that♪
576
00:24:09,637 --> 00:24:11,637
♪Oh it's a bore♪
577
00:24:11,637 --> 00:24:15,637
♪Want me to adore you
now you got that♪
578
00:24:16,929 --> 00:24:19,387
♪But you never
wanted more♪
579
00:24:20,804 --> 00:24:24,595
♪No, I won't be there
when it comes time♪
580
00:24:26,095 --> 00:24:27,136
♪That you want
me to stay ♪
581
00:24:27,136 --> 00:24:28,470
♪Well, I'll
move♪
582
00:24:28,470 --> 00:24:30,470
♪Yeah, I'll
move♪
583
00:24:30,470 --> 00:24:34,178
♪'Cause I'm not
moved anymore♪
584
00:24:34,178 --> 00:24:35,595
♪Yeah, you
push♪
585
00:24:35,595 --> 00:24:37,303
♪And I
pull♪
586
00:24:37,804 --> 00:24:41,261
♪'Til we're in pieces
on the floor♪
587
00:24:41,261 --> 00:24:43,095
♪Yeah, I'll
move♪
588
00:24:43,095 --> 00:24:44,845
♪I'll move
on♪
589
00:24:44,845 --> 00:24:48,679
♪When I'm not
moved anymore♪
590
00:24:49,011 --> 00:24:54,011
♪'Cause you won't
know what love is♪
591
00:24:55,637 --> 00:24:57,845
♪Until you've
touched me♪
40318
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