All language subtitles for The Love Boat S03E14 Docs Ex Change 1080p WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-squalor_track3_[eng]

♪ Love, exciting and new ♪

♪ come aboard ♪

♪ we're expecting you ♪

♪ and love ♪

♪ life's sweetest reward ♪

♪ let it flow ♪

♪ it floats back to you ♪

♪ the love boat ♪

♪ soon will be making
another run ♪

♪ the love boat ♪

♪ promises something
for everyone ♪

♪ set a course for adventure ♪

♪ your mind on a new romance ♪

♪ and love ♪

♪ won't hurt anymore ♪

♪ it's an open smile ♪

♪ on a friendly shore ♪

♪ it's love ♪

♪ welcome aboard
it's love ♪

This ship is bigger
than Cleveland.
I hope I don't get lost.

Whew!

Why did you have to wear
that loud jacket?

To cover up this loud tie.

You oughta be glad
I didn't wear the pants.
It's really a suit.

Hi. Welcome aboard.

Hi.

Lovely place you have here.

Thank you.

Beautiful, isn't it, sweetheart?

Well, it certainly is.

-Still playing Blackjack
on the ship?
-Yes, sir. They sure do.

You're not playing Blackjack.

I don't wanna play.
I just wanna watch.

The last time you watched,
$3000 dollars disappeared.

You remember when you swore
you'd never gamble again?

And I haven't.
Not in six months.

Uh, could you tell us
where our cabin is, please?

Sure, yeah. I, uh--
I don't know your names.

Buddy and Jean redmond.
I'm buddy.

Oh, promenade 348.

Thank you very much.

Mm-hmm.

Come on, Mr. Taste.

Oh, Mr. Taste, uh-- Mr. Redmond.

A gentleman left this for you.

Shh.

The gentleman said--

that was no gentleman.
That was my bookie.

I haven't gambled.

I just bet on sure things.

What's the matter with you?

That guy's jacket. It's so loud.

-I have one just like it.
-I can't hear
what you're saying.

I've got my hands
over my ears.

I'm really sorry, Mr. Carter,
but I called the airline

and they've been unable
to find your luggage.

Well, that's just great.

What are we gonna do?

Look, if those clothes
aren't here by the time we sail,

-I'm gonna sue
everybody involved.
-Well, uh,

maybe I can borrow
some clothes from some
of the other passengers.

We don't need charity.

Hello there. Problem?

Yes.

The airline has misplaced
their luggage.

You can kiss those bags goodbye.

He was kidding.
They'll find them.

What'd I say?

Hello.

Hello.

I'm Madeline Harris.

This is my son, Danny.

Hello, Danny.

Hi.

Mrs. Harris.

Hi.

Hi. You work here?

Well, sort of.

Do I get a discount
because I'm a kid?

Not a chance.

The airlines let kids fly
for half fare.

-But they don't have
a swimming pool.
-I hate girls

who have an answer
for everything.

Well...

I mean, what do you think?

Huh.

Any mom who would take a kid
on a cruise like this
can't be all bad.

Hi, Danny. I thought
you'd be home studying
your history this weekend.

Mr. Hurley. Uh.

Hi. I'm John Hurley.
I'm one of Danny's teachers.

Yes, of course.
Madeline Harris.

We met at open house
at school, remember?

Oh, I remember.
I-- I just wasn't sure you did.

Well, nice seeing you again

and have fun.

Thanks.

Danny.

Have fun? With him on board?

-He seems nice enough.
-Nice?

You know what the kids call him?
Mr. Rotten.

Honest, mom. He hates me.

He really has it in for me.

Danny, it isn't his fault
you're failing history.

Yeah? Then whose fault is it?

Boy, if anyone yells
"man overboard" this cruise,

I hope it's for Hurley.

Hello.

Well, looks like I just made it.

Yes.

And I'm very glad that you did.
Your name, please.

Mrs. Adam bricker.

No kidding?

Hey, we've got
an Adam bricker on this ship.

He's a doctor.
You wouldn't by any chance be

one of his many ex-wives,
would you?

No, I wouldn't.

Speak of the devil.
Doc, come here a minute.

Wait till he finds out
you have the same name.
You wanna hear something funny?

This lovely lady
has the same name--

oh!

-Samantha.
-[Gopher] You know her?

-You lied to me.
-Oh, no, I didn't.

I said I wasn't
one of his ex-wives.

-Huh?
-Brace yourself, Adam.
We're still married.

We're still what?
But we can't still be married.

We were divorced
three years ago.

-Not true.
-No.

Not true?

Not true.

Uh, is there
another doctor in the house?

Jean, darling.
I wanna check out the ship.

All right.

Oh. No gambling!

-Did you hear?

-I heard. I heard.

I told you I wouldn't.

See you at dinner.

Mm-hmm.

Don't forget to lock up.

Mm-hmm.

Tight.

Oh, hi. I wonder
if I could ask you a favor.

Oh. Look,
if you're selling clothes,

see the missus,
she'll buy anything.

Anything that's marked down.

Last week
she bought an escalator.

Oh, come in!

Hello.

Oh, hi. What can I do for you?

Well, I'm trying
to borrow some clothes

for a young couple
that lost their luggage.

Oh, the poor kids.

Yeah, and I did notice

that your husband
is about the same size
as Mr. Carter.

Same size?

Mm-hmm.

Well...

Oh. [Laughs]

Oh, I've got just the thing.

There you go.

Oh.

Thank you. Are you sure
your husband won't mind?

Oh, of course he'll mind.
That's why I like doing it.

Bye-bye, coat.

Thank you.

♪ White wings against the sky ♪

♪ dust beneath my feet ♪

Benny, what's the matter?
What's wrong?

It's more than the luggage,
isn't it?

Nothing's the matter.

You said you wanted
to go on a cruise,
so you're on a cruise.

So what are you
picking at me for?

Is it the money?

No, it's not the money.

We can't afford it,
though, can we?

It's not that.

I stole the money
for the tickets.

What?

Well, I didn't exactly
steal it. I--

i borrowed it from petty cash
from the office.

I was gonna replace it
when we got back.

Replace it with what? How?

Mr. Voegler's gonna have you
thrown in jail.

Why did you do it?

Because...

Other husbands get their wives
what they want and deserve.

I've never been able
to do that for you.

I don't care. I don't need it.
Not like this.

Oh, come on.
I got eyes. I can see.

All your friends,
they've got money.

They go on trips.

I was afraid of losing you.

Oh, Ben.

You know I don't need anything,
except your love.

Samantha, how can we
not be divorced?

I mean, I didn't contest it,
and I sent you $500

to pay the lawyer
for the divorce.

That's true.

And I gave the $500
to the lawyer.

Well, so, go back
and ask him what happened.

[Chuckles] It's so simple.
Just talk to him.

I can't. The judge
gave him ten years.

Seems that he's done this
to other people before.

Samantha, where did you
find this guy?

Oh, my butcher recommended him.
It's his wife's brother.

He does tax returns, too.

-Come in.
-Hi.

Hi, Julie.

Well, I borrowed
some clothes for you.

Oh, thank you.

I know that losing your luggage
really upset you,

but I hope this helps.

It will and please thank
everybody else for us, too.

Okay.

It was really nice of them.

Hey, I'm sorry if I was
a pain in the neck before.

Forget it. Well, at least now
you can all go to dinner, huh?

Bye-bye.

[Giggles]

Bye.

Bye.

-Maybe Mr. Voegler will let you
pay it back weekly.
-Yeah, sure.

You're no criminal.

You don't know voegler.

He believes
in capital punishment...

-For double parking.
-Oh. [Laughs]

We'll work out something.

-Sally.
-What?

Look.

-There must be $2000 here.
-[Laughs]

Probably fell out
of the clothes.

-We'll have to give it back
to Julie.
-Wait a second.

Who said it fell out
from somebody's clothes?

It wasn't on the floor before.

It could've slipped out
from under the bed.

It could've been here
two or three cruises ago.

-Ben.
-It could've.

Honey, if I can give
this money to voegler...

Maybe I won't
have to go to jail.

Jail.

Maybe it did come out
from under the bed.

How's your steak?

The best.

I mean, almost as good
as you make it.

Oh, you.

Good evening.

Well, hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Mr. Hurley, if you're alone,

we'd love to have you join us.

Oh, thank you. I'd like that.

Looks like I've got
some catching up to do, huh?

Why don't you finish my steak?

-I'm not hungry anymore.
-Danny, your dinner.

Danny.

Do as your mother says.

We should've gone by plane.

Well, doc always finds
the pretty ones.

-That's his wife.
-Uh, you mean his ex-wife.

That's what doc thought.

But his ex-wife turned out
to be his ex-ex-wife.

That makes her his wife again.

I don't understand this.

Neither does doc.

I don't understand.
For the past three years,

I've been acting
like a single man. Happy.

Adam, it's not my fault.
I wanted a divorce
just as much as you did.

In fact, now that
I see you again, I think
I wanted it more than you did.

Samantha, I'll tell you
what we'll do.

When we stop
south of the border,

we'll get a Mexican divorce.

-Should we?
-Of course.
Everyone should have

some pleasant memory
from a cruise.

-Hey.
-Hmm?

You're always telling me
I have not taste, huh?

Hmm? No taste? Take a look.

See the guy wearing that jacket?

It's the kind of a jacket
you're always telling me
is too loud.

It is too loud.

Besides, that's your coat
he's wearing.

He's wearing my loud coat?

Mm-hmm.

They lost their luggage.
I loaned it to them.

You know what was
inside that coat?

-What?
-I'll tell you what was
inside that coat.

I was inside that coat.

And I wanna be
inside of it again.

Sorry, pal, but that jacket
is mine and I'd like it back.

Right now.

Please, buddy.

All right.
You can have it back. I--

i didn't steal it.
It was loaned to me.

Right, right.

I know all about that,
but it's my jacket and...

-Buddy, you are embarrassing
these people.
-What color eyes you've got?

Brown? Hey, look.

A lot of people
are wearing blue and brown.

Now, that is
a lovely combination.

Look. I think
it's gonna look good on you.

There you are.
Looks beautiful, doesn't it?

Buddy, i-- you know-- you'll
have to excuse my husband.

I-- I've never seen him
behave this way.

Yes, sir. Really crazy
about this jacket. Am I right?

I've always been crazy
about this jacket.

It's my--
it's my favorite jacket.

Fine jacket.
It's a very good jacket.

I wish I could explain this.

I-- i-- you--

my mother warned me.
I should've listened.

I-- I really should've.

[Lounge music]

You don't look like you're
having such a good time.

I'm not.

My name's Vicki.

Danny.

Danny Harris.

See that lady
dancing with that creep?

The lady's my mom.
The creep's my history teacher,
who's flunking me.

What a bummer.

[Danny] I gotta watch out
for my mom.

I think the guy could be
a philosophical killer.

[Laughs]
You mean, "pathological".

Whichever's worse.
You know what he did once?

-He put a rattlesnake
in my history book.
-What happened?

Nothing. Luckily, I didn't open
my book for a couple of weeks.

[Laughs]

Hi, mom.

Hi, Danny.

This is Vicki.

This is my mom.

Nice to meet you.

And Mr. Hurley.

Hi. How are you?

Hey, Danny. It's getting
a little bit late, isn't it?

I think John...
Mr. Hurley is right, honey.
You should be getting to bed.

-Do I have to?
-Yeah.

I think your mother knows best.

-Good night.
-Good night.

Good night, Vicki.

Good night.

Remind me to tell you
about the time he tried
to poison my ding dongs.

Uh, merrill,
before Samantha gets back,
I wanted to ask you something.

Do you think we're doing
the right thing?

Well, what are you doing?

Well, I think we're getting
a divorce in Mexico.

-I think, but I'm not sure.
-Well, if you're not sure
about what you're doing,

then I'm sure you're doing
the right thing.

The biggest mistakes of my life
were when I was positive
about what I was doing.

Every time I was positive,
I was dead wrong.

I see.

-But you really think
we're doing the right thing?
-I'm positive.

No, wait. You said
every time you were positive,
you were always wrong.

That only applies
to my life, not yours.

Care to dance, twinkle toes?
Excuse us, captain.

Well, captain,
what do you think?

Well, as they say,
it's always nice
looking at a divorced couple,

who are really married,
acting like they're single.

Tired?

No, just very relaxed.

Content.

I've had a marvelous evening.

Well, you see,
there's something else
that we have in common.

Because, uh-- I've had
a marvelous evening, too.

[Sighs]

If Danny saw that,

he'd disown me.

-I, um, hope
I'm not ruining his trip.
-Oh, he'll be okay.

I guess it is a little rough
on him because he's not doing
very well in history.

Yeah, but he
could be doing well.

You know, he has the ability
to be an "a" student,

but he doesn't apply himself.
He's lazy, you know.

And maybe a little bit spoiled.

I don't think so.

You know, when his dad
and I got divorced,
it was very hard on him.

It was a setback for Danny.

Oh, i-- I know
that the divorce hurt him,

but now he's using it, you know,
to take advantage of you

because you feel guilty.

Really?

Absolutely. If I were you, i'd--
I'd be a little tougher on him,
use a little more discipline.

Really?

[John] Absolutely.

You see, you're-- you're
too permissive with him.

You know, you let him
get away with murder.

John, I don't need
your instant analysis.

-I'm only trying to--
-why don't you just
stick to teaching history

and leave parenthood
to people who qualify.

Some fun cruise this is.

I get all prettied up and you
don't come back to the cabin.

If that's all prettied up,
I should have my eyes examined.

Or better you should have
your head examined.

I have been waiting two hours.
Now, where have you been?

Gambling?

No.

I was looking for the guy
who borrowed this jacket.

[Gasps]
What are you gonna do now?
Rip his shirt off?

Very funny. Very funny.

Look, if you
wanna know the truth...

I wanted to apologize
for the way I acted.

You wouldn't happen
to know their name, would you?

No, I don't remember.
Besides, it's late.
It's too much of a bother.

It's no bother.

Not to you, to them.

Believe me, they'll sleep fine.

Oh, boy, you can say that again.

There's no doubt about it.

The money belongs to that man.

You're jumping to conclusions.

He practically tore
that jacket off your body.

Why was he feeling around
and patting all the pockets?

Maybe it's like he said.

It's his favorite jacket.

[Sighs] I bet
the money belongs to him.

We don't know that.

Yes, we do know that.

[Sighs]
We have to give it back.

You're probably right.

Uh-huh.

Let me sleep on it.

Uh-huh.

To our divorce.

To our divorce.

Mm-- [laughs]

You know what I remember most?
Having to wait for you

to brush you hair
200 times every night.

[Gulps]
Whenever I tried to kiss you,

I'd end up with little
pig bristles between my teeth.

[Giggles] To pig bristles.

Mm.

Very appropriate
for someone who is always
throwing their dirty socks

into a corner of our bedroom.

Thank you.

To all your irritating,
disgusting habits.

And to all your irritating
and disgusting habits.

But especially to your
irritating, disgusting habit

of always pointing out
my irritating,
disgusting habits.

I've missed you.

I've missed you, too.

Ah.

You're in my bed.

Well, of course I'm in your bed.

I'm your wife.

Well, thanks
to some cheating lawyer.

Samantha...

You think last night
was really such a good idea?

I mean, I know we agreed
we'd be good friends

till we got to Mexico
to get our divorce, but...

You think maybe we were being
over friendly last night?

What?

My brother
and his wife have never been
that friendly in 20 years

and they've got eight children.

Maybe we should have
some children.

Uh, Samantha, let's not start

something this morning

we'll have to fight
for custody of
this afternoon, hmm?

Maybe you're right.

No, don't do that.

Mm?

You know what that does to me.

I forgot. What does it do?

You know what it does.

Cut that out.

I don't know
what you're talking about.

I'll only give you
$500 a month for child support.

That's more than you gave me
to run the house.

Well, this is different.

This is my son.

And I want him to go
to Harvard law school.

I'll meet you on deck.
I'm gonna try to find
that young man and apologize.

It must really be bothering you.

Do you know you tossed
and turned all night?

Yeah, well, I'm afraid
I spoiled their trip.

I'll see you at the pool.

Oh. Hi.

Oh. Hi.

Julie told us where to find you.

Oh, here's your jacket.

Oh, thanks.

I was just coming
to look for you.

To apologize for last night.

Oh, no. No.

We want to apologize.

We figured out
this was your money.

Well, i--

what is it, buddy?

This is not my money!

Hello. You know, my husband
was just going to look for you.

Yeah, well, I already
apologized, dear.

Are you sure
it's not your money?

Wouldn't I know?

Ask Julie who else
gave you some clothes.

What was that all about?

Nothing.

It's the old "is this
your money" con game.

I saw it on movie of the week.

Suzanne somers played
the part of the girl.

She was good.

I told you. I bet this money
has been in our cabin for...
I don't know how long.

You might be right.

Of course I am.

If it were Mr. Redmond's,
he'd say so, wouldn't he?

I guess so.

Look, if it'll make you
feel better, I'll ask
somebody on the crew, okay?

Yeah, would you?

Sure.

Hello. How are you doing?

Fine, captain.

How are you?

I'm fine, thank you.

Uh...

Captain, if-- if a passenger
lost something on this ship,
you'd know about it, right?

Well, it depends on what kind
of something they lost.

Well, like a ring or a...

Or like a lot of money, sir.

Money? Oh, absolutely.

I think the last time
a passenger reported the loss
of money was about a year ago.

-But we found it.
-You did?

Congratulations.
Thank you so much.

You found it.

Yes.

Thank you, sir.

You just found it, huh?

Thanks a lot.

Just-- just found it, huh?

Good morning.

Boy, you got back
late last night.

I fell asleep waiting for you.

I was with Mr. Hurley.

How could you do this to me?

How could you go out
with a man who's flunking
your one and only son?

You're right.

He is a creep.

Huh. Do you really mean that?

Let's not even talk about him.

I promise you won't have
to put up with Mr. Hurley
any more on this trip.

You're lucky.
You only had him for one night.

I have him every day.

Wanna go for a swim?

No, thanks. You go ahead.

Hey, I've got great news.
My mom and my teacher
hate each other.

That's too bad.

Too bad? Are you wacky?

Well, last night
I got to thinking.

If Mr. Hurly and your mom
get to be good friends,

he wouldn't have the guts
to flunk you in history.

I never thought of that.

That makes sense.
But it's too late now,
she hates him.

Maybe. Maybe not.
I have an idea.

-Okay. But it better work.
Or else.

-Or else what?

You ever try
swimming to acapulco?

[Laughs]

Here's to luck.

Here's to good luck.

Oh, hi. Uh, I wanted
to talk to you

but I had to duck
my wife first.

I hate to tell you this.
That money is mine.

Yeah, you see,
I couldn't tell you before
because I won it on a bet.

And I promised her
I wouldn't gamble.

I can identify it.

Two thousand. 14 100s,
eight 50s and ten 20s.

With a yellow rubber band
around it.

It's all there.

Yeah. Thanks. You're
a couple of good kids.

Besides, it's not a fortune,
you know. It's not gonna change
any of our lives.

Thanks.

Nice here, isn't it?

Yeah, but wouldn't you
rather be swimming?

Honey, is something wrong
with your watch?

No.

You keep looking at it
every two seconds.

Yeah, I just like to know
what time it is
every two seconds.

[Splashing]

Mr. John Hurley
to the pirate's cove.

Mr. John Hurley.

Come on, Danny. Let's go.

One more. Please, mom.

We've had three already.

Hi. I'm John Hurley.

Hi. Isaac Washington.

Nice to meet you.

Look, didn't you just page me?
A little, tiny, high voice.

[High voice]
In a little, little,
high voice like that?

-Yeah.
-No.

Look who's there, mom.
Mr. Hurley.

Come on, Danny. No need
for you to be subjected
to him out of class.

But, mom...

Hi. Madeline...

I understand
what you're saying, Adam,

but are you sure
you want a divorce?

Oh, of course.
Samantha and I

both want a divorce.
Why do you ask?

Well, it seems to me
that you keep saying
you want a divorce,

but from what you've told me
that's going on,

neither of you is acting
like you want a divorce.

You know, you may be right.

Oh, my god.
Maybe we're in love.

-It's possible.
-But I don't want to be in love.

With me, love always
leads to divorce.

And I don't want
to keep getting divorced.

In the time it takes
to get divorced,

-i could be falling in love
with the next woman.
-Adam,

it's hard to argue with a man
that makes such good sense.

It seems to me
you're already in love.

And since you're already
married, why get divorced

when you don't want
to keep getting divorced anyway?

I can't make it
any clearer than that, can I?

See how easy it is when I cut
right through the bone?

If we don't get this finished,
we're gonna miss dinner.

How's that? Better?

"I'm sorry. Please meet me
on the promenade deck at ten.
Mr. Hurley."

I told you, "meet"
is not m-e-a-t.

How's mine look?

You spelled
my mother's name wrong again.

Should I sign it
"Mr. Hurley" or "John"?

Why don't we use their initials?

It sounds more intimate
and romantic.

Women. I just want

to pass history.

Hit me.

I said "hit me",
not "kill me."

Two grand in an hour.
You should open your own store.

Is this the way
you keep your word?
Well, this is my word.

I'm not gonna gamble any more
of my life away with you.

Best hand I've had all night.

This is nice.

Staying in for the evening.

Having dinner at home.

[Cork pops]

[Glasses clink]

Oh, Adam. More champagne?

Mm-hmm.

Well, we gotta celebrate
our decision to stay married.

-You think it'll work this time?
-Of course.

Come to me, my adored one.

In a minute, darling.

One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten...

Do you have to do that now?

Adam, you know
what hair follicles say,
"if you stimulate me..."

[Both]
"I will reward you with shining,
glistening, beautiful hair."

Mm.

Mm.

Adam.

Samantha.

Adam, are you
gonna keep your socks on?

My feet get cold.

But keeping your socks on
is just not romantic.

Samantha, why is it
every single time--

okay, okay, okay. You win.

Here we go.

Come to me, my adored one.

Adam, is that the place
for a mature person's socks?

No.

The place for socks...

Is on a mature person's
freezing feet.

That's the place for socks.

13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19...

Mr. Washington,
I'll have a plain soda.

With plenty of scotch in it.

Right.

Well, how'd you do
at the Blackjack table?

Now I know why they

call it Blackjack.

Wanna feel the lumps?

Hey, it's only money.

I'll remember that
when I leave you a tip.

You can't go back to the office.

Mr. Voegler
will have you put in jail.

Maybe not.

You know he will.

Unless you can pay back
that $2000 you took.

How could I be so stupid?

Taking someone else's money

for-- for a cruise
we couldn't possibly enjoy.

[Woman] Ben, I love you.
I don't want you to go to jail.

I love you, too.

Hi.

Hi.

How are you?

[Both overlap, laugh]

No, you go ahead.

I'm sorry for the way I acted.

I-- I mean, i--
I should say, overreacted.

I'm-- I'm really
the one to blame.
I shouldn't have butted in.

But I did mean well.

I know you did.

I'm glad you sent the note.

The note.

I thought you sent...

[Laughs]

I should've known.

Danny, huh?

Yes.

Disguised, but it's his writing.

I'm kind of embarrassed.

Oh, don't be.
He's smarter than both of us.

At least he found a way
to get us back together.

Yes, he certainly did,
didn't he?

Went to a lot of trouble.

Yes, yes, yes, he did.

And since he went
to all that trouble, uh--

it wouldn't be fair
to let him down, would it?

-No, it wouldn't.
-You know, we've wasted
a whole day.

Let's not waste the night, too.

-[Clears throat]
-Oh, hi.

Mr. Hurley.

Uh, looks like you caught
your mother right in the middle
of a kiss with your teacher.

-A terrific kiss.
-Oh, thank you.

Danny, you and I
are gonna have to have
a man to man talk.

Your mother and I are gonna be
seeing a lot more of each other
when we get back.

-That's great.
-And I don't want
the other kids in class

to get the idea that you're
getting preferential treatment
because I'm dating your mother

so I might have to be
a little bit tougher on you.

-[Sighs]
-But I think you can handle it.

[John] Would you like to dance?

[Madeline] Yes, I would.

Excuse us, won't you?

Bye-bye.

Tougher? Tougher?

I'm gonna kill you.

[Phone ringing]

There you are, Mr. Redmond.

[Buddy]
Thank you and here you are.

[Gopher] Thank you, sir.

Jean.

Jean. Jean, I wanna talk to you.

I see you cashed a check.

You haven't lost enough, huh?

Jean, listen.
I'm gonna gamble one more time
and then never again.

That's from the movie
fat chance.

Hey, just the guy
I wanna talk to.
Could you come here?

Look, if you hadn't been
honest enough to give me back
my money

i never could've made
the killing tonight
that I did in Blackjack.

-Biggest score I ever made.
-That's great. Congratulations.

And I've always made it a habit
to give my good luck charm

a little piece of the action.

Keeps my luck running good.

It's a lot of money.

-I can't take it.
-What do you mean
you can't take it?

What do you want?
You want my luck to turn bad?

Look, miss.
Here, you-- you take it.

Go ahead. For household money.

You know,

"to hold the house
together" money.

Look, I've been a gambler
all my life.

Right now, I'm gambling on you.

I got a hunch you're gonna be
a real big winner.

Take it.

Thank you.

Thank you.

[Laughs]

You know, I don't know exactly
what you just did back there,

but I have a feeling
it was something very nice.

It was.

98... 99...

One hundred.

Congratulations.

Time for bed.

Ah. Okay. All right.

Ah, Adam.

Samantha.

Adam, there're too--
too many covers on this bed.

Oh, hey, hey, listen.
I took my socks off for you.

Adam, I can't sleep
under three blankets.
Look at-- I mean--

okay, that's it. A man spends
a third of his life in bed,

and I don't intend to freeze
a third of my life away.

Don't I keep you warm enough?

Well, of course.

Ah. Maybe it's not
the kind of warm
we both need.

You want a divorce?

Mm?

Well... uh...

Yes, I do.

So do I.

Married, we'd end up
hating each other.

Uh-huh. Divorced,
we'll love each other forever.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

-Hey, come back
and see us again.
-We hope to.

Depends on Mr. Voegler.
Hey, thanks for being so nice.

Hey, wait, wait, wait.
Your luggage just arrived.

Oh.

Oh.

Gee, I hope you guys
had a good time.

-Your luggage went to Portugal.
-Figures.

Bye-bye.

Thank you.

Gee, I wonder
who Mr. Voegler is.

I don't know.
Probably the travel agent.

Hey, a lovely time.

Uh-huh.

Uh, gopher,
you remember my bookie?

You know, the guy that gave you
the envelope full of money.

Yeah.

Yeah, well, I just saw him
in the lobby back there
looking for me.

I think he came
to welcome me home.

Do me a favor, will you?
Will you give him this 50?

I thought you--

I quit betting.

I just don't want
to cut him off cold Turkey.

Goodbye.

Gopher, we better
find that bookie fast.

What's the rush?

Well, if we don't find him,
we'll be stuck with that 50.

Danny, you know,
I've been thinking.
Maybe I could tutor you

a couple of hours a week
in history.

How about math and science, too.

You think it'll help me pass?

Oh, I wouldn't be surprised

if you became a "b" student.

Maybe even an "a".

Hey, let me quit
while I'm ahead, will you?

Are you two sure
you definitely want a divorce?

Merrill, would you
marry a woman who has
pig bristles in her hair,

can't stand blankets,
does sit ups in bed,

and won't let you wear socks?

In a flash.