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1
00:00:04,756 --> 00:00:07,550
♪
2
00:00:07,842 --> 00:00:10,595
-- God, the houses in PEI
are so cheap.
3
00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:12,013
- Mm-hm.
- We should move there.
4
00:00:12,055 --> 00:00:13,765
- What is that?
Like Anne of Green Gables?
5
00:00:13,806 --> 00:00:15,183
I can't live like that.
6
00:00:15,224 --> 00:00:16,684
- I think it's modern now.
7
00:00:16,726 --> 00:00:19,187
- Mm. I can't risk it.
8
00:00:22,774 --> 00:00:24,025
- What do you got?
9
00:00:24,067 --> 00:00:26,360
- Felix and Viv locked
themselves in my mom's bathroom.
10
00:00:27,445 --> 00:00:29,697
- Not our problem
tonight, mother.
11
00:00:30,031 --> 00:00:32,867
- Yeah.
Yeah. That's not our problem.
12
00:00:32,909 --> 00:00:34,243
What are we doing on our phones?
13
00:00:34,285 --> 00:00:38,998
We got wine, we've got
each other. It's only 9:30.
14
00:00:39,874 --> 00:00:42,668
- Get ready for
the night of your--
15
00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:49,759
- Is that our car alarm?
16
00:00:49,801 --> 00:00:53,221
Who'd steal our car?
- It's a bad car!
17
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:55,389
Is that the...
18
00:00:55,765 --> 00:00:58,434
Is that the carbon monoxide
detector?
19
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:04,941
- Nice! Who's the stargazer?
20
00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:07,485
Oh. Yeah, that would be me.
21
00:01:07,527 --> 00:01:10,154
- You check out that Saturn
Jupiter conjunction last year?
22
00:01:10,196 --> 00:01:13,282
- Oh! No. I-- But I'll
definitely get the next one.
23
00:01:13,324 --> 00:01:15,284
- Maybe. It's in sixty years.
24
00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:18,204
- Oh. It's on YouTube I'm sure,
so...
25
00:01:18,246 --> 00:01:20,498
- You got a lot of towels
over there by the furnace.
26
00:01:20,540 --> 00:01:23,543
- Oh. Well, that explains
the carbon monoxide.
27
00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,294
- No. That's just a straight-up
fire hazard.
28
00:01:25,336 --> 00:01:26,629
- Like your house is perfect.
29
00:01:26,671 --> 00:01:27,880
- What's that?
- Huh?
30
00:01:28,256 --> 00:01:31,134
Okay, so your leak is coming
from your water heater.
31
00:01:31,175 --> 00:01:32,844
Which I assume
came with the house.
32
00:01:32,885 --> 00:01:34,303
-Yeah, we're also assuming that.
- Sure.
33
00:01:34,345 --> 00:01:35,847
Well, that has to be replaced
34
00:01:35,888 --> 00:01:37,306
- Now, how ASAP is ASAP?
35
00:01:37,348 --> 00:01:39,767
- Yeah, we got a roof issue
that's been ASAP for years.
36
00:01:39,809 --> 00:01:42,186
- While we're ASAP-ing things, I
love a skylight in the mudroom.
37
00:01:42,228 --> 00:01:44,814
I'd say pretty ASAP.
38
00:01:44,856 --> 00:01:46,065
If that alarm hadn't gone off,
39
00:01:46,107 --> 00:01:47,775
you both would've been
dead by morning.
40
00:01:49,819 --> 00:01:50,945
♪
41
00:01:50,987 --> 00:01:53,364
Hey, who likes
to fish? That's a fun hobby.
42
00:01:55,408 --> 00:01:56,617
- You want one of these?
43
00:01:56,659 --> 00:01:59,704
- No, I'm fine.
I'm totally fine.
44
00:02:00,288 --> 00:02:02,623
Before kids, we never
thought about death.
45
00:02:02,665 --> 00:02:03,624
Too busy living.
46
00:02:03,666 --> 00:02:04,959
We could take risks
47
00:02:05,001 --> 00:02:06,586
like speeding
or eating day-old sushi.
48
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,004
I used to walk through
High Park alone,
49
00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:09,463
at night, with headphones on.
50
00:02:09,505 --> 00:02:11,465
Now, the riskiest thing
I do is jaywalk
51
00:02:11,507 --> 00:02:12,758
or pet a dog I don't know.
52
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,218
Because we have to stay alive.
53
00:02:14,260 --> 00:02:16,095
And we have to
keep our kids alive,
54
00:02:16,137 --> 00:02:17,430
which isn't easy.
55
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,182
Because the Venn diagram
of things that exist
56
00:02:19,223 --> 00:02:21,392
and things that can hurt
your kids is just a circle.
57
00:02:21,434 --> 00:02:24,187
- Poisoned by gas!
- That's...
58
00:02:24,228 --> 00:02:25,897
Is there a more embarrassing
way to die?
59
00:02:25,938 --> 00:02:27,356
- So you wanna die
in a cool way,
60
00:02:27,398 --> 00:02:30,318
like a volcano
or drowning with Harry Styles?
61
00:02:30,693 --> 00:02:33,237
- How are you so calm?
Our house is attacking us.
62
00:02:33,279 --> 00:02:34,197
We almost died.
63
00:02:34,238 --> 00:02:35,323
- No, we didn't.
64
00:02:35,364 --> 00:02:36,949
- I cut my finger on mailbox
the other day.
65
00:02:36,991 --> 00:02:38,868
Could've been my throat.
House is trying to kill us.
66
00:02:38,910 --> 00:02:40,036
- Okay.
67
00:02:40,453 --> 00:02:42,705
I'm gonna go let the bed
smother me to sleep.
68
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,624
We've kids again tomorrow.
69
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:51,005
♪
70
00:02:52,632 --> 00:02:53,466
My bad.
71
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:54,759
- Hi.
- Hello.
72
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:58,471
- Hello. Come in.
Kids have been absolute angels.
73
00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,056
- Thank you so much... Mom!
74
00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:01,599
Really? Marshmallows
out of the bag?
75
00:03:01,641 --> 00:03:03,392
- Treats are allowed
at Nanima's house.
76
00:03:03,434 --> 00:03:04,393
Those are the rules.
77
00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:06,312
- It's ten in the morning. Hi!
78
00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:08,189
- Mommy!
- Daddy!
79
00:03:08,231 --> 00:03:09,690
- Yeah.
80
00:03:09,732 --> 00:03:12,568
- Hi. Oh, my goodness!
- Love you.
81
00:03:12,610 --> 00:03:13,819
- Wow. What's all this?
82
00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:15,363
- Nanima said I look beautiful.
83
00:03:15,404 --> 00:03:19,075
- Well, you're always beautiful
and smart and impressionable.
84
00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:21,118
Why don't you guys
go see
85
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:23,496
if there's marshmallows
in the cushions?
86
00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:25,957
So, what did you two do
last night?
87
00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:28,167
Just give a wink if it was
R-rated.
88
00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:30,169
- Mom, no, nothing.
It was quiet, very quiet.
89
00:03:30,211 --> 00:03:31,629
We watched a movie, went to bed.
90
00:03:31,671 --> 00:03:33,631
- Almost got smothered to death
by a carbon monoxide leak.
91
00:03:33,673 --> 00:03:34,882
- What?
- Really?
92
00:03:34,924 --> 00:03:36,467
- We need to warn people
about being poisoned.
93
00:03:36,509 --> 00:03:38,511
- Oh, my God! Well, did you find
the source?
94
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,638
- Fine. We just needed
a new water heater.
95
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:42,598
- Well, you are lucky
to be alive.
96
00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:44,350
You can never be too careful.
97
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:45,977
I had a friend who died
98
00:03:46,018 --> 00:03:48,062
from falling down.
- What?
99
00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:49,355
The distance from her head
100
00:03:49,397 --> 00:03:50,898
to the floor was enough
to kill her. Dead.
101
00:03:50,940 --> 00:03:53,109
- Please tell me she was tall.
- Five-one.
102
00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:54,860
- Don't worry, if you two
drop dead...
103
00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:56,654
- Mom!
- ...I will happily step up
104
00:03:56,696 --> 00:03:57,738
and raise the cuties.
105
00:03:57,780 --> 00:04:00,366
- Thank you. That means a lot.
106
00:04:00,658 --> 00:04:03,577
- We cannot leave our kids with
Nisha when we... if we die.
107
00:04:03,619 --> 00:04:05,121
- Can you stop talking
about this?
108
00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:07,164
We're gonna be so old.
We're gonna be disgusting.
109
00:04:07,206 --> 00:04:08,624
We'll be dragging our skin
around,
110
00:04:08,666 --> 00:04:09,917
throwing it over our shoulders
111
00:04:09,959 --> 00:04:11,294
and high-fiving
our great-grandkids.
112
00:04:11,335 --> 00:04:12,712
- Oh, my God!
You're freaking out too.
113
00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:14,213
- All right.
I'm freaking out, okay?
114
00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:15,923
Here it is. I'm freaking out.
Are you happy?
115
00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:18,426
- No. We just need a plan.
116
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:19,802
- All right, fine.
117
00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:22,471
When I die, would you just put
me in an urn like Rhubarb?
118
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:26,809
- We need a plan
for the people we leave behind.
119
00:04:26,851 --> 00:04:28,978
Rhubarb didn't have a mortgage
or kids.
120
00:04:29,020 --> 00:04:30,980
- Oh, God. He would have been
such a great dad.
121
00:04:31,022 --> 00:04:32,106
- We need a legal guardian,
122
00:04:32,148 --> 00:04:33,441
so that my last thought isn't
123
00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:35,151
"Should I take the kids
with me or...?"
124
00:04:35,192 --> 00:04:37,028
- All right. We'll do it. We'll
talk about it. We'll decide.
125
00:04:37,069 --> 00:04:39,905
And once we have, we're never
talking about death again.
126
00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:41,073
- Agreed.
127
00:04:41,115 --> 00:04:43,075
- So who are these lucky
bastards who inherit our kids?
128
00:04:43,117 --> 00:04:46,495
- But I can never get used to
the jet lag, going to Singapore.
129
00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:49,123
I had to fire an entire
marketing team,
130
00:04:49,165 --> 00:04:50,374
on essentially no sleep.
131
00:04:50,416 --> 00:04:51,584
- Oh no.
- Oh.
132
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:53,919
- It's okay. Slept like a baby
on the way back.
133
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:56,672
Pods in first class,
quiet comfy.
134
00:04:56,714 --> 00:04:59,258
- Mm. Anyway. Um...
135
00:04:59,300 --> 00:05:00,593
So, there's actually a reason
136
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:02,845
that James and I
asked you both over tonight.
137
00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:04,638
- Mm-hm, mm-hm,
we were talking about
138
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:05,806
what great parents you are.
139
00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:08,142
- And aunt and uncle.
- Yes.
140
00:05:08,476 --> 00:05:10,061
Amazing. So good, in fact...
141
00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:13,022
- Such good work.
- ...that we want--
142
00:05:13,064 --> 00:05:14,607
- You wanna? Okay.
- Mm-hm.
143
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,611
We would like you to be Felix
and Viv's legal guardians.
144
00:05:19,070 --> 00:05:21,197
You know, if anything ever
happened to us.
145
00:05:25,076 --> 00:05:26,327
- Um...
146
00:05:26,744 --> 00:05:29,372
Yeah. I mean, that's a big...
147
00:05:30,206 --> 00:05:32,792
O... kay.
148
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,460
- What? Yeah.
149
00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:37,004
- Okay?
- Mm-hm.
150
00:05:37,046 --> 00:05:38,714
- You know, if it's too much
of a hassle,
151
00:05:38,756 --> 00:05:40,758
we can just drop our kids off
at the State of the Dark Web.
152
00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:43,969
- Oh, God, no!
We love Felix and Viv.
153
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:45,638
We would absolutely
take care of them
154
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:47,014
if something happened to you.
155
00:05:47,056 --> 00:05:48,557
- I would take a bullet
for either of them!
156
00:05:48,599 --> 00:05:50,518
- Would you? Take a bullet
from who, Dawn?
157
00:05:50,559 --> 00:05:52,311
If James and I die, it's not
gonna involve the Mob.
158
00:05:52,353 --> 00:05:53,979
- That's comforting to know
how you won't die.
159
00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:57,274
- I've always known that
my death won't involve stones.
160
00:05:57,316 --> 00:05:58,526
- You sure?
161
00:05:58,567 --> 00:05:59,777
- Will you take our children?
162
00:05:59,819 --> 00:06:01,487
- Of course we would take them.
163
00:06:01,529 --> 00:06:02,696
It's just...
164
00:06:02,738 --> 00:06:04,949
Two more kids plus Corey,
there's a lot to consider.
165
00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,283
Have you put savings aside?
166
00:06:06,325 --> 00:06:08,160
- Are you asking me
how much they're worth?
167
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,245
- No.
168
00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:12,123
But, there are practical
financial realities
169
00:06:12,164 --> 00:06:13,707
attached to dying,
you know, Astrid.
170
00:06:13,749 --> 00:06:16,168
- Yeah, thanks, Dawn!
I do know, thanks!
171
00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:18,671
Relax, we're not about to
dine and dash on life.
172
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,089
- Here's the deal.
We're fairly solid.
173
00:06:20,131 --> 00:06:21,715
We own almost
an eighth of this house.
174
00:06:21,757 --> 00:06:22,800
- Plus, a car!
175
00:06:22,842 --> 00:06:25,678
- Plus, a car, that's not
a great car,
176
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,513
- but... snow tires.
- It's got snow tires.
177
00:06:27,555 --> 00:06:31,267
- Um, do you have life insurance
and RESPs for the kids?
178
00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:33,561
- Obviously, Bo.
- We're not animals.
179
00:06:33,602 --> 00:06:36,147
Oh, my God! Are you okay?
180
00:06:36,188 --> 00:06:37,731
- Don't look. Don't look.
181
00:06:37,773 --> 00:06:39,525
- Wrong pipe. Wrong pipe.
182
00:06:40,776 --> 00:06:42,736
- We are animals.
- No, no we're not.
183
00:06:42,778 --> 00:06:44,405
I mean, yeah,
technically we are.
184
00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:46,157
But not the bad kinds
like muskrats or...
185
00:06:46,198 --> 00:06:49,827
Have you ever seen a hagfish?
Just need life insurance.
186
00:06:50,286 --> 00:06:53,622
- Why? So we can get back to my
sister with a sexier offer?
187
00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:56,625
- And we can start living.
Like, truly living.
188
00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:58,002
- What does that mean?
189
00:06:58,043 --> 00:07:01,172
- Mm, like travel. You know,
discovering new places.
190
00:07:01,213 --> 00:07:02,381
- You wanna be a colonizer?
191
00:07:02,423 --> 00:07:03,799
- I could leave my job
for a year.
192
00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:05,551
- Or forever, because you hate
your job.
193
00:07:05,593 --> 00:07:06,886
- No, we could go to India.
194
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,596
We take the kids to India,
start a farm, maybe.
195
00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:10,848
Like a... We'll learn to farm
and then start our...
196
00:07:10,890 --> 00:07:12,141
- What is happening?
197
00:07:12,183 --> 00:07:14,643
Is this a cute little preview
of your mid-life crisis?
198
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:16,854
- I'd...
199
00:07:18,397 --> 00:07:19,732
No, I just...
200
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:22,318
Is this the best life we could
be living or just the safest?
201
00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:25,571
Hey.
202
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,531
- Hey, pal. You just lurkin'?
203
00:07:27,573 --> 00:07:29,408
- I had a nightmare.
204
00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:30,743
- Yeah.
- Okay.
205
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:33,120
- So did your daddy
and he's not able to sleep.
206
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:35,080
♪
207
00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:38,042
- What were you guys
talking about?
208
00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:39,210
- Oh, nothing.
209
00:07:39,251 --> 00:07:41,879
Why does daddy wanna be
a farmer?
210
00:07:41,921 --> 00:07:44,048
- He doesn't.
He hates fertilizer.
211
00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:47,343
Okay, you have one more question
and then sleep, okay?
212
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:48,552
- Okay.
213
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,139
What happens when you die?
214
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,727
- Do you still have birthdays?
215
00:07:56,769 --> 00:07:58,646
- Well, you don't really
get older,
216
00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:00,523
so there's not really any point.
217
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,608
Okay, sleep tight. Right?
218
00:08:02,650 --> 00:08:06,362
- Can you tell when it's gonna
be your last birthday ever?
219
00:08:08,239 --> 00:08:09,823
- Um...
220
00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:13,369
No one...
221
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:16,247
No one really knows when it's
gonna be their last birthday.
222
00:08:17,456 --> 00:08:19,333
You only get one life.
223
00:08:19,375 --> 00:08:21,168
And when that's over...
224
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:25,005
it's over forever.
225
00:08:25,881 --> 00:08:30,010
Just one more reason to make
every birthday special.
226
00:08:30,386 --> 00:08:32,555
To make everyday special.
227
00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:36,350
- Do worms pee?
228
00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:40,646
- Are you kidding me?
I just gave you a great answer.
229
00:08:40,688 --> 00:08:42,106
You need to go to sleep now,
okay?
230
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:43,566
- Good night.
- Good night.
231
00:08:48,279 --> 00:08:51,824
♪
232
00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:14,346
James.
233
00:09:15,139 --> 00:09:17,933
You okay?
- Yeah. I'm okay. Why?
234
00:09:17,975 --> 00:09:20,352
- Well, we can't both not be
working. It's too conspicuous.
235
00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:21,895
We could trade off, if you want.
236
00:09:21,937 --> 00:09:23,063
Or you could just go back
237
00:09:23,105 --> 00:09:24,356
to working all the time.
I prefer that.
238
00:09:25,441 --> 00:09:26,859
Okay. We need
all hands on deck
239
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,528
for what I can only describe
as a crisis.
240
00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,280
- Okay, what is it?
241
00:09:31,322 --> 00:09:32,448
- Kiwis.
242
00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:34,908
Our California supplier is
experiencing a kiwi shortage
243
00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:36,660
due to a root-fungus plague.
244
00:09:36,702 --> 00:09:39,371
- Oh. Yeah.
I've had that before.
245
00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,999
- And because we're not
one of the big chains,
246
00:09:42,041 --> 00:09:43,042
they're icing us out.
247
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,460
- What about another supplier?
248
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,170
- We can't afford to offend
our regular supplier
249
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:48,047
by going somewhere else
for a one-off. It's too risky.
250
00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:49,340
- Damn it!
251
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,175
Doesn't sound like there's
anything we could do about it.
252
00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:53,510
- We will get kiwis into our
stores, so help me God, Ennis.
253
00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:55,638
- Well, we're not the ones
taking a risk, Marla.
254
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,890
Our suppliers need us
more than we need them.
255
00:09:58,307 --> 00:10:00,351
- I don't usually like to be
contradicted, James,
256
00:10:00,392 --> 00:10:03,145
but it sounds like you want to
exploit someone's weakness.
257
00:10:03,187 --> 00:10:04,772
- Oh, yeah. He can be ruthless.
258
00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:06,106
One time when we were roommates,
259
00:10:06,148 --> 00:10:08,400
he used fruit flies' love
of fruit against them,
260
00:10:08,442 --> 00:10:10,903
to devastating effect.
It was a slaughter.
261
00:10:11,195 --> 00:10:13,530
- Okay. We're gonna go
with James' new supplier plan
262
00:10:13,572 --> 00:10:17,451
and I will try and keep
the board at bay with emails.
263
00:10:20,829 --> 00:10:22,122
- This is the crisis?
264
00:10:22,164 --> 00:10:23,832
There's people in the world
with not enough food
265
00:10:23,874 --> 00:10:25,417
and we're worried about...
266
00:10:25,918 --> 00:10:27,169
fruit salad in Burlington.
267
00:10:27,211 --> 00:10:30,589
- Yeah. It's stupid
that we have to work.
268
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:34,301
Kiwis are the ones that
look like dinosaur eggs, right?
269
00:10:34,343 --> 00:10:39,139
♪
270
00:10:39,765 --> 00:10:43,185
- Hey, Viv.
Be careful with the fingers.
271
00:10:44,186 --> 00:10:45,312
Okay?
272
00:10:46,105 --> 00:10:47,690
So, any plans for the weekend?
273
00:10:48,065 --> 00:10:50,484
- Uh, probably just sleep in,
274
00:10:50,776 --> 00:10:52,111
catch up on reality shows.
275
00:10:52,486 --> 00:10:55,489
Cooper, I swear
to Christ, slow the F down!
276
00:10:55,531 --> 00:10:57,491
Drink a bottle of wine or two.
277
00:10:57,533 --> 00:10:59,618
- Oh. Weekend without
the kids, then.
278
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:04,790
- I wish.
- Dynasty, don't eat dirt!
279
00:11:04,832 --> 00:11:06,166
What about you?
280
00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:08,168
- Oh. Not much.
281
00:11:08,544 --> 00:11:12,756
Um, can I ask you a question?
Do you have life insurance?
282
00:11:12,798 --> 00:11:14,508
I'm not selling it,
I'm just curious.
283
00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:18,512
- Uh, Ashley Lynn Mercedes, get
your hands out of your pants!
284
00:11:18,846 --> 00:11:21,849
God! Who has time
for life insurance?
285
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:24,518
I can't tell you, I'm
so happy to hear you say that.
286
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:27,146
'Cause I've been feeling like
such a loser for not having it.
287
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:30,357
- Oh, my gosh! Please!
Life is busy enough.
288
00:11:30,691 --> 00:11:33,068
And what now we have all these
baking videos,
289
00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:34,611
you know, making us feel
like shit
290
00:11:34,653 --> 00:11:37,156
'cause we can't bake a cake that
looks like a bag of Doritos.
291
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,407
- Yes! Preach it.
292
00:11:38,449 --> 00:11:41,660
- And everyone is just like,
"Get a family doctor,
293
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:44,329
"get their ears tested,
get them vaccinated,
294
00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:46,790
"wear a mask" and on and on
and on.
295
00:11:46,832 --> 00:11:49,752
- I mean, you should probably
get them vaccinated.
296
00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:52,504
- I mean, who knows
what to believe anymore.
297
00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:54,715
Plus, two out of four
are vaccinated.
298
00:11:55,174 --> 00:11:57,885
- Okay. So, you're just hedging
your bets on immunity?
299
00:11:57,926 --> 00:12:02,055
- Yes. Exactly, thank you.
You get it. We're the same.
300
00:12:02,097 --> 00:12:03,307
- Okay.
- Cooper!
301
00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:06,268
Cooper, do not touch
that dead squirrel.
302
00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:12,733
♪
303
00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:14,943
We got a new
water heater.
304
00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:17,905
Wanna rock-paper-scissors to see
who gets the first hot shower?
305
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:21,074
- No, I'll just go first.
I found an insurance company.
306
00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:22,326
- Oh. That's great.
307
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:24,495
Takes the pressure off of,
you know, staying alive.
308
00:12:24,536 --> 00:12:25,913
- Yeah. They're gonna send
someone over
309
00:12:25,954 --> 00:12:27,414
to give us an assessment
this weekend.
310
00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:29,458
So, the healthier we are,
the lower the premium.
311
00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:30,959
- We're healthy. Look at us.
312
00:12:31,001 --> 00:12:34,338
- Well, we drink. And when was
the last time you smoked?
313
00:12:34,379 --> 00:12:36,340
- Weed's legal now. And also,
314
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:38,634
it was like, half a joint
a month ago.
315
00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:39,718
Also, it was hash, I think.
316
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,303
- You smoked hash? Where?
317
00:12:41,345 --> 00:12:44,348
- That night. With the boys.
318
00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:47,684
- Okay. Well, that will cost us
thousands of dollars a year.
319
00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:50,103
If they find out.
320
00:12:51,772 --> 00:12:53,023
- Oh.
321
00:12:55,234 --> 00:12:58,362
- Oh, hey. Yeah, come on in.
322
00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,571
You're the insurance lady?
323
00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:01,573
- Sorry. Hi. Yes, I'm June.
324
00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,450
No. Sorry. I'm Jen.
325
00:13:03,492 --> 00:13:05,077
Oh, jeez!
326
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,746
- It's okay, it's all right.
I forgot you were coming.
327
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:10,624
Actually, I totally did. I was
going back to do my 10K.
328
00:13:10,666 --> 00:13:13,293
But it's all right,
I'll do twenty tomorrow.
329
00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:14,670
- What does the K stand for?
330
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:16,839
- Hey, look who it is?
Jen, this is my wife Astrid.
331
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:20,425
She's the smoothie-head.
- Oh.
332
00:13:20,968 --> 00:13:22,219
- Hi.
- Hi.
333
00:13:22,261 --> 00:13:23,512
Honey, quick question.
334
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:25,180
What would you like for dinner?
Quinoa or spelt?
335
00:13:25,222 --> 00:13:27,641
- Spelt. Just saying the word
makes my mouth water.
336
00:13:27,683 --> 00:13:28,725
Spelt.
337
00:13:28,767 --> 00:13:30,310
Mom, where are the
gummy worms?
338
00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:32,437
At the store,
where we left 'em.
339
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:35,399
- Where do they get that?
- Not with us.
340
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:39,570
- Okay, so I'm gonna ask you
some standard health questions.
341
00:13:39,611 --> 00:13:42,364
Uh, don't be nervous.
Just be honest.
342
00:13:42,406 --> 00:13:46,118
- What? People actually lie?
These things are so unnecessary.
343
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,119
- James, stop.
344
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,037
- Okay, do either of you smoke?
345
00:13:49,079 --> 00:13:49,997
- No.
- Never.
346
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:52,082
- Okay. And do you drink?
347
00:13:52,124 --> 00:13:54,084
- Glass of wine or two
with dinner.
348
00:13:54,126 --> 00:13:56,336
- Maybe on the weekends.
- I mean, not even sure.
349
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:57,921
- Always with food.
- Always with food.
350
00:13:57,963 --> 00:14:00,674
- But a lot of... I mean,
we try to balance, so yeah.
351
00:14:00,716 --> 00:14:01,717
- Red meat?
352
00:14:01,758 --> 00:14:03,176
- Just not a big fan.
- Rarely.
353
00:14:03,218 --> 00:14:05,846
- Love a pun. Absolutely.
How often do you exercise?
354
00:14:05,888 --> 00:14:07,806
Three to five times
a week.
355
00:14:10,267 --> 00:14:11,476
- Okay.
356
00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:15,355
- Um, what about marijuana
consumption?
357
00:14:15,981 --> 00:14:17,774
- Gross.
- Not a fan.
358
00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:19,484
- You know what?
359
00:14:20,152 --> 00:14:21,528
You guys are so healthy.
360
00:14:21,570 --> 00:14:24,197
- Oh. I don't...
- Oh. Us?
361
00:14:24,239 --> 00:14:25,282
You're kidding.
362
00:14:25,324 --> 00:14:27,409
- This is you saving
a dead person.
363
00:14:27,451 --> 00:14:30,454
- Oh, aren't you
just the sweetest?
364
00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:31,747
Thank you.
365
00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:34,124
- And this is a picture of
a ghost trying to eat a pizza.
366
00:14:34,166 --> 00:14:36,001
But his ghost mouth keeps going
through it.
367
00:14:36,043 --> 00:14:40,005
- Oh my goodness! I can barely
draw my own name most days.
368
00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:41,048
Thank you!
369
00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:42,758
All right.
You're ideal customers.
370
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:45,594
Honestly, I wish my life was
half as together as yours.
371
00:14:45,636 --> 00:14:46,845
But it's not.
372
00:14:46,887 --> 00:14:49,348
'Cause I made some mistakes
about seven years ago.
373
00:14:49,681 --> 00:14:52,643
So, once we complete
your physical exam
374
00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:53,769
I'll get out of your hair.
375
00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:55,020
- Physical?
- Physical?
376
00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:56,521
- Of course.
- Oh, crap.
377
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:59,441
We thought the exam was more
like a written test.
378
00:15:00,651 --> 00:15:03,070
Hey, it's as you said,
you guys are healthy.
379
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,530
These tests,
they're just gonna prove that.
380
00:15:05,781 --> 00:15:08,450
- Yeah... Oh.
381
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:15,499
- Hi.
382
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:17,250
- James and I have opened RESPs
for the kids
383
00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:19,252
which we will contribute
to regularly.
384
00:15:19,294 --> 00:15:20,837
- How... wonderful.
385
00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:22,631
- We are also getting
life insurance
386
00:15:22,673 --> 00:15:23,882
which covers everything except
387
00:15:23,924 --> 00:15:25,717
skydiving accidents
and acts of war.
388
00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:27,386
If however,
and this is important,
389
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:30,681
we get murdered by you or Bo,
you will get nothing.
390
00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:32,182
- Bo wouldn't hurt a fly.
391
00:15:32,224 --> 00:15:34,059
- Are my kids good enough
for you now, Dawn?
392
00:15:34,393 --> 00:15:36,812
- Bo and I were always happy
to take them. Always.
393
00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:39,106
We just had some
money questions, that's all.
394
00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:40,899
Three kids is a lot of kids.
395
00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:42,025
- No, it isn't.
396
00:15:42,067 --> 00:15:43,610
It's not unmanageable.
People do it.
397
00:15:43,652 --> 00:15:44,987
- Three of anything is too much.
398
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:47,906
Two cars is reasonable,
three is pure vanity.
399
00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:51,743
Two beers is a nice drive home,
three, potential manslaughter.
400
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,078
Two bananas is a lot--
401
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:55,205
- Two examples is enough,
three is carrying on a bit.
402
00:15:55,247 --> 00:15:56,999
Look, just so you know,
403
00:15:57,374 --> 00:15:59,001
James and I would be happy
to take Corey,
404
00:15:59,042 --> 00:16:01,420
if anything ever happened to
you or Bo. No questions asked.
405
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,796
- No, if anything happens to us,
406
00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,339
Corey's gonna live
with Bo's brother.
407
00:16:04,381 --> 00:16:06,425
- What?
- Well, Trevor has the cottage,
408
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:08,635
he's well off and has no heirs.
409
00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:09,553
- Wow.
410
00:16:09,845 --> 00:16:12,431
All right. If you guys die
after we both die,
411
00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:15,183
Trevor takes our kids too.
Checkmate!
412
00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:16,935
♪
413
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:27,696
- You guys got burgers?
414
00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:32,200
- We're celebrating.
415
00:16:32,242 --> 00:16:35,579
Today was a thrilling,
challenging, magical day.
416
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,956
- The guy I called is gonna
sell us some kiwis?
417
00:16:37,998 --> 00:16:39,374
- Cute little hairy apples.
418
00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:42,294
- And we terminated our
agreement with the old supplier.
419
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:43,545
A message to the produce world
420
00:16:43,587 --> 00:16:45,464
that we will not be
screwed with.
421
00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:46,840
- No, no, no.
422
00:16:46,882 --> 00:16:49,634
A new supplier in Chile means
a way larger carbon footprint.
423
00:16:49,676 --> 00:16:50,886
- As unfortunate as that is,
424
00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,763
the environment
doesn't sit on the board.
425
00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:55,390
And the board
is impressed by you.
426
00:16:55,432 --> 00:16:56,516
- Great.
427
00:16:56,558 --> 00:17:00,562
- It is great, because
they've agreed to make you
428
00:17:00,604 --> 00:17:04,024
regional manager
of the new franchises.
429
00:17:04,066 --> 00:17:06,068
- Hey. Come on.
430
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,779
Now he's not my boss now, right?
We're still equals?
431
00:17:08,820 --> 00:17:11,531
- You and I are gonna be here
for a long time, James.
432
00:17:11,573 --> 00:17:13,784
I've got big plans for us.
433
00:17:14,493 --> 00:17:16,119
- You should have
a celebration burger.
434
00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:18,455
All right, I mean, fun.
435
00:17:18,497 --> 00:17:20,248
♪
436
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:28,757
Hey, James.
437
00:17:30,926 --> 00:17:32,385
- I don't want it.
438
00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:33,929
- Okay, well, they have
439
00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,555
a non-meat option I think,
if that's what--
440
00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:39,476
- I can't do this anymore.
I can't be a lifer here. I quit.
441
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:44,272
♪
442
00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:45,607
- Mm-hm.
443
00:17:50,445 --> 00:17:52,072
- Okay, I'm gonna just go.
444
00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:56,034
♪
445
00:17:56,910 --> 00:18:02,249
♪
446
00:18:10,090 --> 00:18:13,176
Being a parent means
taking on a lot of stress.
447
00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:14,553
You worry about their headaches,
448
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,138
you get angry
when they use your phone
449
00:18:16,179 --> 00:18:17,806
to take pictures of you
sleeping.
450
00:18:17,848 --> 00:18:19,641
And the stress takes
a toll on your body.
451
00:18:19,683 --> 00:18:21,893
High blood pressure,
increased chance of diabetes,
452
00:18:21,935 --> 00:18:23,436
can take years off your life.
453
00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:25,480
The stress might also
cause you to make
454
00:18:25,522 --> 00:18:27,315
rash, life-changing decisions
455
00:18:27,357 --> 00:18:29,025
without first checking-in
with your--
456
00:18:29,067 --> 00:18:30,944
Yeah, more of
a health thing though,
457
00:18:30,986 --> 00:18:32,571
which is why so much
of parenting
458
00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,114
is about calming down.
459
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:37,075
Catching your breath,
and preparing yourself for
460
00:18:37,367 --> 00:18:38,410
more stress.
461
00:18:38,994 --> 00:18:42,247
- Okay, but check it again.
Well, check both of them.
462
00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:45,208
Yeah, check. Triple.
463
00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:48,837
- Hey, you're home early.
Everything okay?
464
00:18:48,879 --> 00:18:50,463
- Yup. It's...
465
00:18:50,922 --> 00:18:52,048
I have huge news.
466
00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:53,550
- Okay, this is gonna
have to wait.
467
00:18:53,592 --> 00:18:55,719
- Huh? Oh, my God! This lady?
468
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,679
Sorry about that.
469
00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,764
I was worried that I left
the front door unlocked,
470
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:02,392
but really I just
left the stove on.
471
00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:04,394
Okay, it's good
you're both here.
472
00:19:04,436 --> 00:19:07,981
So, there was a little bit of a
mix-up with your blood work
473
00:19:08,023 --> 00:19:10,108
at the lab. It could have been
anybody's fault.
474
00:19:10,150 --> 00:19:13,987
Mm. That's from yesterday.
Pretty lumpy.
475
00:19:14,029 --> 00:19:15,322
Okay. All right.
476
00:19:15,363 --> 00:19:17,699
So, it seems I found out
some stuff
477
00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:20,744
that you didn't
actually disclose.
478
00:19:20,785 --> 00:19:23,163
Little sneaks.
- All right, fine. I smoke weed.
479
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:25,373
I mean, it's not a lot but...
it's enough.
480
00:19:25,415 --> 00:19:27,667
In fact, I'm gonna smoke
a little bit when you leave.
481
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:28,543
- James.
482
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:30,879
- No, that's not what it was.
But thank you for telling me.
483
00:19:30,921 --> 00:19:33,715
'Cause that's absolutely
gonna increase your premiums.
484
00:19:33,757 --> 00:19:35,884
- You bet.
- No, I came to make sure that
485
00:19:35,926 --> 00:19:39,930
Astrid really wants to
get insured now.
486
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:43,892
- Well, no one really wants to
get insured ever.
487
00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:45,268
But what's wrong with now?
488
00:19:45,602 --> 00:19:48,271
- It's just that it'll be
cheaper if you do it after.
489
00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,440
- After what?
490
00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:52,234
- The baby.
491
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:53,568
No!
492
00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:57,614
- Oh, my God! You didn't know
you're pregnant!
493
00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:02,035
- James.
494
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:03,995
We're having a baby.
495
00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,124
- I just quit my job.
496
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:19,177
- I used to fish a lot
when I was a kid.
497
00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:22,013
My dad used to take me to the
same fishing hole every summer.
498
00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:24,849
Unfortunately, he stood up in
the boat one summer
499
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:26,351
and off he went. And...
500
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,853
Well, we searched for hours
but we never found him.
501
00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:30,146
But, we did find his rod.
502
00:20:30,188 --> 00:20:32,023
Now, this rod
is a very lucky rod.
503
00:20:32,065 --> 00:20:34,401
Which I have written
"Nature boy" on the side of.
504
00:20:34,442 --> 00:20:36,027
And that's the kind of rod
I take out.
505
00:20:36,069 --> 00:20:37,487
Okay, so you've seen
"Nature boy."
506
00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:39,656
I bring it to truck sometimes
to show off.
507
00:20:39,698 --> 00:20:41,700
Because I feel like just having
that rod around
508
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:44,703
brings back my father.
It also brings me luck.
37818
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