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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,040 --> 00:00:04,400 MAN ON RADIO: OK, listen up, cos you're not going to believe this, 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:07,720 but it's from the RAC, so it's gospel, right? 3 00:00:07,720 --> 00:00:12,000 They're saying that this weekend, the big August bank holiday, 4 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:14,520 52% of you are on the move. 5 00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:17,480 And, hey, that's not all. Guess what I've just heard? 6 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:20,680 I've heard the wettest August on record is running out of rain 7 00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:22,560 and sunshine's on the way. 8 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 The temperature's rising, so turn up the volume, 9 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,680 and let's all chill out to this... (SOFT ROCK MUSIC) 10 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,400 Shut up! (TURNS RADIO OFF) 11 00:00:30,400 --> 00:00:33,200 Oh, no, I like this one. Come on. I can't bear it any more. 12 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:36,240 How are we supposed to chill when I'm melting? 13 00:00:36,240 --> 00:00:38,280 It's like being braised in an oven. 14 00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:40,320 OK, bend over. 15 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:43,360 (GIGGLES) What? Come on. 16 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:45,680 Do as you're told. Bend over. Bend over. 17 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:47,760 Put your head down. That's it. 18 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:50,480 (GIGGLES) No, not to do that. 19 00:00:50,480 --> 00:00:53,520 (LAUGHS) Stay. Keep your head down. What are you doing? 20 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:56,400 You're gonna love me for this. You're gonna love me forever. 21 00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:58,440 What are you doing? (LAUGHS) 22 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:00,920 It's OK. OK, are you ready? 23 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:03,680 What are you doing? Are you ready? Yeah! Oh! 24 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,720 (LAUGHS) See? 25 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:09,920 That is like melting. 26 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,240 Come on, it must help a bit, no? 27 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:14,280 (SNIFFS) Oh! 28 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:16,040 Rufus! 29 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:18,800 Are you licking my face? Come on, lick it, Rufus. 30 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:24,160 Look, just thinking about diving in that pool. 31 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:26,280 Good lad. Yeah, if they've got one. 32 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:28,520 Course they'll have one, it's Ollie and Daisy. 33 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:31,080 They'll have an infinity pool, or something. 34 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:33,280 Yeah, true. 35 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,880 Always something special. 36 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:47,160 Go on! Go on, Ian! Push him in! 37 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:50,960 Come on, Ollie! 38 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:54,880 Yeah! 39 00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:24,400 What are you doing, Ian? There's no hard shoulder. 40 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:27,040 I just wanna stretch my legs. It's dangerous. 41 00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:29,080 (HORN HONKS) 42 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:31,120 Whoa! 43 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,560 Still no hard shoulder. 44 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:35,360 Wow! 45 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,880 Ever do stupid things twice? 46 00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:43,400 OK. So this is where we broke down on our way to Ollie's and Daisy's three months ago. 47 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:46,640 I remember these pine trees. 48 00:02:46,640 --> 00:02:49,800 Yeah, they rented this country house in Suffolk, 49 00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:52,840 and invited us down for the August bank holiday weekend. 50 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:57,560 Ollie and Daisy, they're my oldest friends. We met at college. 51 00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:00,720 Well, Ollie's my oldest friend because we were house mates, 52 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,880 but Daisy came along soon afterwards. 53 00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:06,720 Does anyone else have a problem with long-term friends, or just me? 54 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,760 I mean, I love them, you know, I do, 55 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:11,720 but, well, they never want anything to change. 56 00:03:11,720 --> 00:03:13,760 I'm talking pecking order. 57 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:16,560 Status. Does this ring any bells? 58 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,520 Basically, you've gotta be the same person that you were 20 years ago 59 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:24,120 which is fine, most of the time 60 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:28,520 but, erm, Ollie's very competitive. 61 00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:30,560 As you'll see. 62 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:33,480 (GRUNTS) Now, that's a shot. 63 00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:36,440 And when things gets as serious as they got... 64 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,960 ..and you're someone like me who feels guilty about everything, 65 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:44,120 then, I think, along with everyone else who was there, 66 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,040 you have to ask yourself whether you played a part. 67 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:53,760 This is me retracing my steps and I'm specifically here because... 68 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:58,800 ..and this is very important, cos everything feeds everything else. 69 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:01,360 And sitting waiting for the breakdown truck, 70 00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:04,400 I distinctly remember going over a phone call I had from Ollie. 71 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,040 (RINGS) No, not the first one. 72 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:09,080 Not the one inviting us. 73 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,520 The second one. The one where he called me at work. 74 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:14,440 The one where he thought he'd be leaving a message. 75 00:04:14,440 --> 00:04:16,480 (RINGS) Ollie. 76 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:19,360 Oh, er, Ian. The answer's yes. 77 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:22,000 We are free that weekend and we'd love to come. 78 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:25,400 And Em says 'Thanks,' and 'Will we see Archie?' 79 00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:28,560 I said, 'Probably not, it is the Notting Hill Carnival.' 80 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,280 Yeah, it's a tad awkward. 81 00:04:30,280 --> 00:04:33,280 Turns out Daisy's already asked someone for the bank holiday. 82 00:04:33,280 --> 00:04:35,320 What do you mean? 83 00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:39,440 Well, she's invited this... this Milo chappy, you know. 84 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:42,240 What do you mean, Milo? Milo who? Who is he? 85 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:45,240 I don't know his second name. He's one of her designer clients. 86 00:04:45,240 --> 00:04:48,760 We were wondering if you guys could come the previous weekend? 87 00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:51,160 No, we're fully booked for all of August. 88 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:54,000 Oh, well, in that case - I mean, I can ask Em this evening. 89 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:57,120 I can't call her now, she's in a meeting. No, no, no. Ian. 90 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,640 Ian, no, listen. Don't ask Em anything. 91 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,960 Let's leave it, leave things as they are. 92 00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:04,200 It's been two years, for Christ's sake. 93 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:07,080 You and I have unfinished business. It's been three years. 94 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:10,440 Got to run. Bring your weapons. Come on Friday, early as you can. 95 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:12,480 Let's make the most of it. 96 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:17,600 I shall get you, you idiot! 97 00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:21,360 Oi! Campbell! 98 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:24,440 Pack it in! 99 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:27,800 That's what you get the next time you mess around with me. Oi! 100 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,600 Campbell, get away from him! 101 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:31,360 (AIRCRAFT WHOOSHES OVERHEAD) 102 00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:34,400 Get up. Get up. Are you all right? 103 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:37,120 Look what you've done. Me? I ain't done nothing. 104 00:05:37,120 --> 00:05:39,160 Campbell, I just saw you kick him. 105 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:42,800 Right, come on. We're off to see Mrs Baines. Come on. 106 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,840 No. 107 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,320 Campbell - I ain't going nowhere with you. You can't make me. 108 00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:54,160 Everything's connected, you see? 109 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,200 Everything. 110 00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:01,240 And, no matter how guilty I feel, I just have to remind myself... 111 00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:04,520 ..it's not like I'm a murderer. 112 00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,520 Are you crazy? 113 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:11,200 It says 'No hard shoulder. Stay in car.' 114 00:06:12,280 --> 00:06:14,720 I know, it's just... (GRUNTS) 115 00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:16,920 Are you worried about next week? 116 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:21,240 Oh, no. 117 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:24,200 I wasn't, thank you. Sorry. 118 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,240 No. No. 119 00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:28,960 No, that's wiped from the mind till Tuesday. 120 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,000 OK. 121 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:35,320 I was thinking...I wonder if they're gonna give us uniforms. 122 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:37,960 You know, butler and housemaid. 123 00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:42,800 Oh, hey, listen, I am not being waitress again for the weekend. 124 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:44,640 I'm only joking. No, I'm serious. 125 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:48,160 If we turn up and they've got friends there, we make our excuses 126 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,840 and we hotfoot it out of there. 127 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:52,240 We're the only ones going, I know we are. 128 00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:54,640 We'd better be. We are, I know we are. 129 00:06:56,720 --> 00:07:00,880 A bit of animosity there towards Ollie and Daisy, wasn't there, eh? 130 00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:05,160 No. Yeah, there was. Well, I'm sure you'll have a lovely weekend. 131 00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:07,200 We both will. 132 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:13,280 Ian, I am here for one thing and one thing only. 133 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:17,560 Oh. Oh. 134 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:19,720 Well, you won't be disappointed. 135 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:21,800 No? No. 136 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,600 In fact, while we're waiting... 137 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:29,040 ..what are we waiting for? 138 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:32,480 Come on, you said we've got to do it as often as possible. 139 00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,600 (GIGGLES) She got pregnant in a lay-by (?) 140 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:38,640 People might see. Doesn't mater. 141 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,960 (GROANS) What? 142 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:48,040 Oh! 143 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:50,080 (LAUGHS) 144 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:08,480 A couple of things before we arrive I think you should know, 145 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,520 and Em knows this... 146 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:15,760 ..but...I went out with Daisy before Ollie did. 147 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:18,840 Have you ever been in that situation 148 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:22,360 where you're socialising with someone you've been intimate with? 149 00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:26,880 Well, it's interesting, because that intimacy is always there, 150 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:28,920 like a secret. (RINGS) 151 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:32,120 Talking of which, Daisy called the night before we left, 152 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:35,200 to let me know that she had something to tell me that weekend. 153 00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:38,920 There it is. There it is. 154 00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:42,840 OK. Exciting. 155 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,720 I'm going for the long and winding road 156 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:51,400 through a canopy of trees to a Georgian mansion. 157 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,000 Dream on. I think this is it. 158 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,080 Oh, my... 159 00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:05,120 What a tip. 160 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:07,160 Not what I expected. 161 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:09,960 Oh. At last! 162 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,720 About time. Where have you been? 163 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:14,880 I thought you'd got lost or something. Sorry, we broke down. 164 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:17,800 (DOG BARKS) Tried to call. No reception. One of the joys. 165 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,720 (LAUGHS) It's good to see you again, Em. 166 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:25,040 Here's the man. Ollie. I'm not shaking your hand. Come here. 167 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:29,560 It's good to see you. And you, and you. 168 00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:33,520 How are you? Grand, but hot. 169 00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:36,520 You look trim. Yeah? So do you. 170 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:38,560 Come on, drinks. 171 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,680 It's Arts and Crafts, you know, 1920ish. 172 00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:48,920 Name three people associated with the Arts and Crafts movement. 173 00:09:48,920 --> 00:09:51,480 William Morris. Yeah. John Ruskin. Yeah. 174 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:55,120 John Ruskin - Saying the same name twice doesn't count. Come on. 175 00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:58,240 Gonna have to hurry you. (MIMICS COUNTDOWN MUSIC) 176 00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:00,560 Could have had Voysey, could have Burne-Jones, 177 00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:02,920 should have had Crane, even Rossetti at a push. 178 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:05,360 Yeah, but asking me questions you know the answers to 179 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:07,400 and answering the questions isn't clever. 180 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,760 Yeah, I know. Why do I enjoy it so much? I don't know. 181 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:13,800 In here we have the dining room and then, through here... Oi, come here. 182 00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:15,920 ..is the study. 183 00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:18,560 And then, in here, we have the kitchen. 184 00:10:18,560 --> 00:10:20,880 And then, through here... 185 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,040 Come on! 186 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,920 ..the living room. 187 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:33,800 You know, this hasn't changed for 35 years. 188 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:37,000 What do you think? What? 189 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,880 What do you think? They think it's a nightmare. 190 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,480 They think they've come all this way to stay in this. 191 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:45,320 Oh, my God! Hello, Em. Hi. Are you all right? 192 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:48,320 Lovely to see you again. Oh, here. This is for you. 193 00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:51,600 Oh, thank you. You didn't need to do that. It's all right. 194 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,720 Oh, look, Ollie. Cava. Wow! 195 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,480 Smashing. 196 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:57,120 Hello, you. Hello, you. 197 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:01,000 Nice to see you. 198 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:04,040 Well, I like it. Actually, no, I don't like it, I love it. 199 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:07,560 Ollie, later, get them a drink. They've been on the road for hours. 200 00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:10,800 Sorry, OK. I'll show you something that is good about the place, 201 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:13,560 although you do have to leave the house to find it. 202 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,600 (BIRDSONG) 203 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:17,680 Oh, wow! 204 00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:19,640 Oh! 205 00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:21,280 Oh, this is lovely. 206 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:26,000 Yeah. As long as the sun shines, this just about saves it. 207 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:29,920 And there's more. Come on. 208 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:37,560 When we first got here though we arrived late, 209 00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:41,240 it's tipping it down, we can't find the lights anywhere. Creepy! 210 00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:44,440 Oh, yes! Your dog. What's its name? Rufus. 211 00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:46,480 Hello, Rufus. What are you eating? 212 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:48,920 Yes, you are beautiful! Isn't he? Go play. 213 00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:50,840 Drinks are served in the sun trap. 214 00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,480 Yes, the sun trap. 215 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:57,800 Here we have a sun trap with shade. 216 00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,640 Oh! 217 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:02,040 I don't go anywhere else. I lie out here all day. 218 00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:04,760 Usually topless, the neighbours are having a field day. 219 00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,400 It's completely secluded. I hope you'll join me. 220 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:09,920 Em, you are looking so well. Thanks. 221 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:13,080 Why don't we set the lunch out? Good food and drink we can offer. 222 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,720 Point of order, 223 00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:17,360 Ian and I have to get a move on if we're gonna get a game in. 224 00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:20,000 We'll just have sandwiches or - They've just got here. 225 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,000 Have you brought your clubs? Yeah, sure. 226 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,440 And there's no jeans, no cords, no shorts. 227 00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:27,080 Have you got some chinos? I didn't... Course he didn't. 228 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,760 What? Ollie, forget it. We can just play nine. 229 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:31,640 You booked the restaurant for 7:30. 230 00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:33,960 There's no dress code on the short course. 231 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:37,040 We'll be done by six. Yeah, sure, if no-one else minds. No. 232 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:39,400 Well, at least let them get their bags in. 233 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:41,640 You could take the dog. On a golf course? 234 00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:43,680 Are you serious? 235 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:45,720 (LAUGHS) 236 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:57,280 (BOTH LAUGH) 237 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:01,480 I mean... 238 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,560 I mean - What, the house? 239 00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:05,880 Yeah, the house, 240 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:09,120 but the way we have to do everything Ollie wants immediately. 241 00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:11,280 Oh, you didn't want to play golf? 242 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:13,840 Yeah, I want to play golf, but not instantly. 243 00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:16,480 Well, at least there are no other friends here. 244 00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:18,720 Not a surprise. Have you seen the place? 245 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,440 Oh, great, everything's ironed, thank you (!) 246 00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:23,480 No, it's good to see him. 247 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:25,360 Oh, no, it's really great to see him. 248 00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:27,000 What? 249 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,880 I don't know. It just all sounds a bit gay. 250 00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,440 Yeah, topless or not topless? Yeah, not funny. Not. 251 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:39,800 No, Daisy can carry it off, as I noticed you noticed. 252 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,760 Well, she's wearing next to nothing. 253 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,200 Yeah, which makes this look like a burka. 254 00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:48,200 No, you look great in that. I love you in that. Yeah? 255 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:51,680 Yeah, you know I do. Whoa! Don't leave me. 256 00:13:51,680 --> 00:13:53,720 Hang on, I'm coming. 257 00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:57,120 Oh, God, I don't like this place. 258 00:13:57,120 --> 00:14:00,400 It creaks, and don't say you haven't heard it. 259 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,920 Do you mean it's haunted? Don't even say that word. 260 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:07,720 Well, it's gotta have something going for it. 261 00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:11,160 Before you go, can you bring me some water, please, with ice? 262 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,200 I'm busy. Ollie! 263 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:16,680 All right. 264 00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:26,000 Ian, how are we doing? 265 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:30,360 Yeah, I'm coming as I am. Is that OK? 266 00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:34,160 Ollie and Daisy are control freaks. 267 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:37,720 This, I assume, is coming across but, can I just say that 268 00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:44,040 returning to the place where bad things happen can be unsettling? 269 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,160 And what comes next triggered everything, I know it did. 270 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:54,800 OK, so I did not see what was coming next 271 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:58,160 and if that's down to the way Ollie and I lock on to each other 272 00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,520 when we're together, then I think you need to know how we met. 273 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:04,400 Ollie and I were on the same course at college for two terms 274 00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:06,520 without saying a word to each other. 275 00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:08,560 I mean, I knew who he was. 276 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:12,200 Ollie was good-looking, well-dressed, 277 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:15,240 very confident, sporty 278 00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,400 and, let's face it, rich. 279 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:21,120 That vital ingredient, especially with the ladies. 280 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:25,240 Whereas I was broke, hated sport. 281 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:27,960 And, yeah, I was good-looking enough, 282 00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,600 but I was at college to learn. 283 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:33,680 I was currently learning that I didn't wanna do law any more. 284 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:37,280 I filled whole notebooks with why it's a sham subject, 285 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:39,320 which it is. 286 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:41,360 So I was invisible to Ollie 287 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:45,040 until, one day, a prop forward snaps his cruciate knee ligament for him, 288 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,440 which is very painful, and then he sees me. 289 00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:50,160 What he sees, he doesn't like, but he can't get away. 290 00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:52,800 You know what they say, opposites attract, so... 291 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:56,200 I know exactly why I'm going to be a lawyer. 292 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,840 Good. Why? 293 00:15:57,840 --> 00:16:00,280 I'm telling you. I'm just hearing pompous - 294 00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:03,480 I want to be lawyer because lawyers are the guardians of morality. 295 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,240 What? It's their job to establish the truth. 296 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:10,280 What? No. No, it's their job to represent their clients. 297 00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:12,520 They're hired guns and the best lawyers, 298 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:14,200 the most successful are the ones 299 00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:17,200 who get juries to find guilty men innocent. It's not that simple. 300 00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:20,200 It's simpler than that. Truth doesn't come into it. How can it? 301 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:22,240 It can't. All truth is subjective. 302 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:27,920 And, today, he's a top barrister and I'm a primary school teacher. 303 00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:32,600 But we brought things out in each other. 304 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:34,640 We complemented each other 305 00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:38,240 and we discovered we'd each met our match when it comes to being competitive. 306 00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:40,480 Anyway, that bank holiday weekend... 307 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:42,880 Oh, wait, actually, before we go any further, 308 00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:45,720 there's another thing I think you should. 309 00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:48,320 Every year - or at least when we can - 310 00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:51,640 Ollie and I have a three event triathlon for money, 311 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,680 which...which matters. 312 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:58,200 And it's become tradition to start with golf, which I hate. 313 00:16:58,200 --> 00:16:59,960 I think it's a knob's game. 314 00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:02,400 One point per hole, a put of less than 3' is a gimme. 315 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:05,680 And I get a two point start. No, one point. We're playing nine holes. 316 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,680 You only get one p... Yeah, right, very funny. 317 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:11,800 Tell you what, seeing as we haven't done this for a couple of years, 318 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,840 how about we double the bet? 319 00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:15,880 Call it 500 quid. 320 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:18,440 It's been three years, actually. All right. 321 00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:20,680 Even better, let's make it 750. 322 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,840 Or a grand. How about we round it up to a grand? 323 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:28,480 I think that's probably a bit much. No, a grand. 324 00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,560 You're on for a grand. All right, all right. 325 00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:33,160 Come on, your tee off. Have you been practising? 326 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:35,200 (CHUCKLES) 327 00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:46,560 (LAUGHS) 328 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:54,880 Good shot. 329 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:11,400 OK. One discarded tee shot without penalty, free and gratis. Go on. 330 00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:13,440 Have another one. Take it again. 331 00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:31,160 Oh, yes! 332 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,040 One-and-a-half to three-and-a-half. Now we're cooking. 333 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,080 That's my ball. 334 00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:39,960 What? You just putted my ball. 335 00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:43,000 Why didn't you stop me? I thought you were joking. 336 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,440 About what? Joking?! 337 00:18:50,120 --> 00:18:51,760 OK. 338 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,800 Your hole. No. 339 00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,120 No, no, no, it's yours. No, no, Ollie. 340 00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:58,200 It's yours. It's my mistake, your hole. 341 00:18:58,200 --> 00:19:00,560 It's yours. Two-and-a-half each. 342 00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,840 Beautiful. (Course you've been bloody practising.) 343 00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:16,880 Sorry? Good shot. 344 00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:21,800 (MUTTERS) 345 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:24,640 (SIGHS) 346 00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:26,840 Have a discarded shot. 347 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:29,000 Take it again. Go on. 348 00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,320 Free and gratis. 349 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,000 Take it twice. 350 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:06,000 I concede you in the golf. One-nil to you. 351 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:09,200 What? 352 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:11,240 You're conceding? 353 00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,960 No. No. Don't worry, it's best of three. 354 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:16,760 I'll peg you back tomorrow, just not at golf, OK? 355 00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:18,800 My swing's gone, 356 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,000 which is hardly surprising, considering what's been happening. 357 00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:25,120 Why? What's been happening? 358 00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:27,160 Ollie? 359 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,960 Apart from being given my cards, not much, I suppose. 360 00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:32,600 Which cards? What cards? 361 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,640 Nothing. Forget about it. 362 00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:37,680 Let's go back to the house. 363 00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:42,080 You know, it's where we spent... 364 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,240 ..my last holiday with my father? 365 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,600 What is? The house. 366 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:49,640 Summer of '83. 367 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,880 Say Hello, Wave Goodbye. Soft Cell. Fancy a pint? 368 00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:55,920 (ENGINE ROARS) 369 00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:01,200 Nice wheels. Three litre V8. 370 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,280 They don't make 'em like this any more. 371 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,280 There you go. Lovely. 372 00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:21,600 Thanks. Cheers. Cheers. 373 00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:29,360 So...what's so serious that puts you off your golf swing? 374 00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:32,200 What's all this about being given your cards, eh? 375 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,040 Have your chambers ditched you? 376 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,640 I've been given my cards by the medics. 377 00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,000 I've got an inoperable brain tumour. 378 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:45,680 I'm going to die...as in soon. 379 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:49,080 As in if I'm still around in six months, it'll be a miracle. 380 00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:55,280 Jesus, Ollie. 381 00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,520 That's all there is to know, I'm afraid. 382 00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:59,960 Christ! Are you saying that there's no hope? 383 00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:02,560 Look, they've done an MRI. They've seen it. 384 00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,720 They've seen the brain tumour and I go in next week 385 00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:08,080 for a PET scan to confirm it's malignant. 386 00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:14,560 Erm... 387 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:16,600 So you're not certain, then? 388 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:19,040 Well, I am, I mean, I've done the research. 389 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,240 I've got all the symptoms. Headache, metallic taste in the mouth, 390 00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:25,120 dizziness, blurred vision, loss of golf swing. 391 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:28,480 That's the weird thing. 392 00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:31,520 I don't care. Live, die... 393 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:35,000 So what? 394 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:39,560 Of course you care. No, really. Honestly, nothing moves me. 395 00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:41,600 Nothing gets to me any more. 396 00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:43,640 I've got no feelings. It's like... 397 00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:48,080 I don't know, it's like I've been cauterised. 398 00:22:49,120 --> 00:22:53,720 Nothing... (CLEARS THROAT) At the golf course, you lost your temper. 399 00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:56,680 Yeah, all right, it's not... 400 00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:59,880 It's not...quite what I meant. 401 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:04,160 I mean, I'm talking about the nitty-gritty of what's to come, 402 00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:06,920 you know, when we shuffle off this mortal coil. 403 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:11,160 And if, as I suspect, it's diddly-squat, then, you know... 404 00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:15,440 ..I could murder someone tomorrow. 405 00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,480 Today. 406 00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,640 It wouldn't bother me at all. 407 00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:27,840 I've got no conscience. 408 00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:34,440 I'm evil, Ian. 409 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:40,240 You'd better watch out. 410 00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:52,440 All right, listen, don't say anything when we get back, yeah? 411 00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,680 I didn't mean to tell you. I don't want anyone else knowing yet. Yeah. 412 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,320 Sure. Of course. 413 00:23:57,320 --> 00:23:59,920 I mean, Daisy knows though, right? You told Daisy? 414 00:23:59,920 --> 00:24:02,760 Why did I... (ENGINE DROWNS SPEECH) What did you say, mate? 415 00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:05,480 What? More than I wanted to. End of discussion. 416 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,320 Ollie, should you be driving? It's my last weekend. 417 00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:36,880 (LAUGHTER IN DISTANCE) 418 00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:38,920 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 419 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:49,480 This time on Fridays, I'm usually telling teenage delinquents 420 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:52,000 not to do anything stupid over the weekend, 421 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,320 which always works a treat as you well know. 422 00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:57,680 Who's this you're talking about? 423 00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:01,840 Em's work, the boys she works with, 424 00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:05,280 who she's thrilled not to be dealing with today, 425 00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,000 so let's change the subject. 426 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,040 Who won at golf? Oh, erm... 427 00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:12,280 (GIGGLES) 428 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:15,440 If it wasn't for the awful clothes... 429 00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:17,120 Really? 430 00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:19,600 No, not your clothes. 431 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:22,040 The jumpers and hats... 432 00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:30,760 (SHRIEKS) 433 00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:32,520 Shit! Ian, what's going on? 434 00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:34,200 There's somebody in the kitchen. 435 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:36,520 Archie, what's going on? It's Archie? 436 00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,680 (LAUGHS) What are you shouting about? 437 00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:43,520 I didn't think he would be here. You said he wouldn't be here. 438 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,520 He's standing there with a knife. What are you doing with a knife? 439 00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:50,000 Cutting a shoelace. It's a bread knife. We don't have a shoelace one. 440 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:54,640 It's OK. Em, have you seen who's here? Yeah, we said hello already. 441 00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:58,000 I'm not gonna say that you've grown, but you have. 442 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:00,040 It's good to see you. How's things? 443 00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,440 How's school? Which way have you gone? 444 00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:04,680 The restaurant we're going to is fairly smart, 445 00:26:04,680 --> 00:26:08,040 so if you want to get ready, we need to be leaving in about half an hour. 446 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,800 Are you coming along? No. It's a fish restaurant. 447 00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:14,040 He hates fish. You hate it, don't you? It's pointless, he hates fish. 448 00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:15,920 Me and the dog'll look after each other. 449 00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,080 Archie, can you come and give me a hand? 450 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:19,800 It's good to see you. 451 00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:22,600 You can come if you want. 452 00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:27,040 I don't want. OK, well, there's pizza in the fridge and beer. 453 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,080 Ooh, who said that? Archie! 454 00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:37,680 Oh, my God. Yeah, close the door. 455 00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:44,400 Do you know what Daisy just told me? 456 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,640 Do you mean - Archie's dropped out of school. 457 00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,680 Hasn't been going since Christmas. Took zero GCSEs. 458 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,720 What? Yeah. 459 00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:56,760 And Ollie wouldn't let her call us. 460 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:00,880 No. 461 00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:03,600 He probably thought we'd gloat, which we would. 462 00:27:04,640 --> 00:27:07,000 Oh, come on. Private education fails. 463 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:10,200 We'd have a field day. No, we're friends first. 464 00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:13,880 It's crazy - I deal with school refusers and you're a teacher. 465 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,240 (SIGHS) Maybe we'll talk about it later. 466 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,960 Yeah, maybe...not tonight eh? 467 00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:23,000 Why not? 468 00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,040 Oh, yeah, maybe. 469 00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:28,080 I don't know. Let's see. 470 00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,320 I'm just going to find an iron. 471 00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:33,360 OK. 472 00:27:37,120 --> 00:27:41,520 The truth is...I needed a moment to take in Ollie's news... 473 00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:46,720 ..because, let's be clear, Ollie told me. 474 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:49,960 He didn't tell anyone else, he told me 475 00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,600 and you've just heard how proud he is... 476 00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:56,480 ..so that means he wanted me to know for a reason. 477 00:27:56,480 --> 00:28:01,720 And maybe, just maybe, he was looking to the future 478 00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,360 and letting me know that, from that moment on, 479 00:28:04,360 --> 00:28:06,400 I would have to be there for Daisy. 480 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:09,960 Looking out for her and... 481 00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:14,320 ..you know. 482 00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,640 Because I can remember those times with Daisy from 20 years ago 483 00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,680 like they just happened. 484 00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,720 She was so... 485 00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:32,040 ..so...just lovely. 486 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,080 Just lovely. 487 00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:40,280 And I was a pretty experienced guy. 488 00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:45,320 But, er... 489 00:28:45,320 --> 00:28:47,360 Kissing Daisy was amazing. 490 00:28:56,280 --> 00:28:59,680 It's like she was pure, but still available. 491 00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,200 Not easy, though. No, God, no. No, no, no. 492 00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,240 No, she knew how to handle me. 493 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:26,080 Yeah. 494 00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:29,760 I can conjure up our intimate moments just like that. 495 00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:32,160 Just like that, drop of a hat, cos... 496 00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:36,520 ..well... 497 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:41,760 Well, how can you say that two people are meant to be together? 498 00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:44,560 You can't. 499 00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:48,240 You can't say it's written in the stars... 500 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,960 ..but when you feel it, you feel it. 501 00:29:57,200 --> 00:30:01,560 And, then, what does that do to me and Em? 502 00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:05,480 Because Em is my wife, you know. 503 00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:07,760 For better or worse. 504 00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:10,120 For richer or poorer. 505 00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:14,840 And it's like Ollie has given me this terrible gift. 506 00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:23,160 Then I started thinking, I wonder if he's setting us some mind games? 507 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,960 Because Daisy has feelings for me too, she does. 508 00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:31,520 Why would she call last night and tell me she has something to tell me when she sees me? 509 00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,560 And what is it? 510 00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:36,800 My head was just full of her. 511 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:48,760 The thought occurred... 512 00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:55,800 A quickie thought. What do you reckon? 513 00:31:25,720 --> 00:31:27,760 And then I told her about the tumour. 514 00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:34,680 Don't say anything. Of course not. 515 00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,280 Well, unless they do. 516 00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:40,320 No, they won't. 517 00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:43,760 Ollie doesn't wanna talk about it and Daisy doesn't know yet. 518 00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:47,840 What do you mean, she doesn't know? He hasn't told her. 519 00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:49,880 He hasn't... How...? 520 00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:53,240 How can he not have told her? I dunno. 521 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,560 Look, I'm sure he's got his reasons. 522 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,600 And what would they be? 523 00:31:57,600 --> 00:31:59,640 I don't know. 524 00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:04,120 Maybe he wants to wait until he knows how long he's got. 525 00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:07,080 Look, I'm not sure. I didn't really hear him, OK. 526 00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:11,200 He either said she doesn't know or he doesn't want her to know. 527 00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:13,520 I don't know. He doesn't wanna talk about it. 528 00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:16,640 How are you guys doing up there? Two ticks, mate, just coming. 529 00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:19,280 Ian? What? She can't not be told. 530 00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:23,680 What does that mean? If Ollie won't tell her, then we have to. 531 00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:26,400 No. (KNOCK AT DOOR) Em, don't. 532 00:32:30,120 --> 00:32:32,560 In my mind, the restaurant's just down the road, 533 00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:34,800 but on the map apparently it's 20 miles away. 534 00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:38,680 Great dress. 535 00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:42,040 Come on, chop-chop. 536 00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:52,400 Ollie, slow down. 537 00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:56,120 I'm barely doing 60. I don't care, it's blowy back here. 538 00:32:57,360 --> 00:32:59,400 (GIGGLES) 539 00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:02,520 That is the last time you buy a sports car. 540 00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:05,760 You know, my dad used to drive a Triumph stag. This could be his. 541 00:33:05,760 --> 00:33:08,640 What, the same model? No, the exact same car. 542 00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:11,800 See that chip there? I remember it from when I was a boy. 543 00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:15,120 That's why I bought it. Paid over the odds but, you know. 544 00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:17,160 To sit where my dad sat... 545 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,440 (HORN HONKS) Ollie! 546 00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:22,480 Handles beautifully. 547 00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:24,680 Are you all right? Yeah. 548 00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:26,720 Yeah. 549 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:45,800 OK, erm, what shall we kick off with? White? Yeah, to start with. 550 00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:48,760 How about the New Zealand Marlborough, please? 551 00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:50,800 Listen, let me treat you. 552 00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:53,920 Can we have a bottle of the Chablis Grand Cru '92? Yes, of course. 553 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:55,760 And the, erm... 554 00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:58,160 The Montrachet '83 please? Mm-hm. 555 00:33:58,160 --> 00:34:01,720 Can we have them both opened and brought to the table on ice? Of course. 556 00:34:01,720 --> 00:34:06,440 And also a bottle of the Chambertin. Chambertin '72. 557 00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:08,480 Certainly. 558 00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:11,960 Christ almighty, Ollie. 559 00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,520 They don't know what they should be charging. They've got oysters. 560 00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:18,520 Which ones? Their own natives and Ardkinglas. 561 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:20,680 Shall we order a dozen of each? Uh-huh. 562 00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:23,920 Do you guys like oysters? No, not for me, thanks. Yeah, sure. 563 00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:28,280 Sorry, do you want to find your own entertainment for this evening? 564 00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:31,480 Maybe talk amongst yourselves. Ian! Ian! They're staring. 565 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:33,520 Yeah, at the menu board. 566 00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:43,480 (Can someone help me out, please?) 567 00:34:43,480 --> 00:34:45,640 Sorry. Sorry. Misunderstanding. 568 00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,000 Sorry. Cheers. 569 00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:53,520 It's nice. Yeah, it's good. 570 00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:55,560 Mm. 571 00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:57,880 It's not the New Zealand Marlborough... 572 00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:00,360 (LAUGHTER) ..but it's good. 573 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:02,600 It looked fine to me. 574 00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,440 How's yours? Mm, fantastic. 575 00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:07,840 Ollie, steady with the drink. You're driving. It's Friday night. 576 00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:09,640 The nearest policeman's in Ipswich. 577 00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:13,000 Anyway, this wine actually defines the special occasion. Really? 578 00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,400 Yeah, we've got '72 - the year of my birth, 579 00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:17,720 '83 - the last summer I spent with my father, 580 00:35:17,720 --> 00:35:20,920 and then '92 - the year I met Ian. 581 00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:23,320 Oh! Cheers! And Daisy. 582 00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:26,000 No, I'm '93. Oh. That comes later, maybe. 583 00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:30,240 Meanwhile, here's to old friends and a great weekend. 584 00:35:30,240 --> 00:35:32,360 ALL: Old friends and a great weekend. 585 00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,080 Oh, and the bet. 586 00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:36,760 May the best man win, which isn't happening at the moment. 587 00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:38,800 The bet? What...? 588 00:35:38,800 --> 00:35:40,840 What does he mean? What bet? 589 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:47,680 Ollie, do us a favour. Tell Em what you're talking about 590 00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:49,880 and what the origins of this are. It's cool. 591 00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:51,920 OK, well, it was, er... 592 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:55,640 My mum was throwing a party, wasn't it? Mm. For our graduation. Yeah. 593 00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:59,280 It was, yeah, she was just showing me off to her friends. 594 00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:03,680 He'd just got a first. Yeah, it was all stockbrokers and their wives. 595 00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:06,680 Ghastly affair. Anyway, we're all drinking to cope 596 00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:10,640 and I decided to hijack the event by announcing my engagement to Daisy. 597 00:36:10,640 --> 00:36:13,360 Indeed, I'm actually already in my preamble. 598 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,760 Ian and Daisy are over by the pool. 599 00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:18,120 Drunk. Yeah, very drunk. Very drunk. 600 00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:21,320 (TAPS GLASS) Could I have everyone's attention, please? 601 00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:24,200 I only wish my father was still with us. 602 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:30,280 I would have liked him to have met a very special person in my life... 603 00:36:31,280 --> 00:36:35,200 ..because, this evening, I plucked up the courage to ask... 604 00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:39,560 And, well, till death us do part... 605 00:36:42,080 --> 00:36:45,080 My, erm... 606 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,120 Erm... 607 00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:50,240 My good friend Ian. 608 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:55,960 Who's er...spurred me on through college 609 00:36:55,960 --> 00:37:02,000 and has agreed to take part in a yearly best of three contest. 610 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,760 A triathlon, to honour and commemorate 611 00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:07,360 the wonderful times we've shared at college. 612 00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:13,320 So, please, a round of applause, for Ian Goade. 613 00:37:13,320 --> 00:37:15,360 (CHEERING) 614 00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,400 Well done. 615 00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:19,840 And then my mom said she'd put up the money, 616 00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:21,880 so it's more of a wager than a bet. 617 00:37:21,880 --> 00:37:24,800 The money's not important. We can forget about the money. 618 00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:26,640 It's beating you, that's what counts. 619 00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:29,000 I'll tell you what is really funny. 620 00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:35,240 I have heard this story I don't know how many times, so many times, 621 00:37:35,240 --> 00:37:40,560 and he has never mentioned the engagement, the throwing up, 622 00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:43,360 or the prize money. Why dilute the moment? 623 00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:45,760 So it's just me praising you, is it? 624 00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,800 (LAUGHTER) 625 00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:54,000 To round off the story, this is the news I was going to tell you - 626 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:57,560 Ollie and I are finally getting married, next month. 627 00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:01,640 Oh, that's wonderful. Champagne! No, Ollie! No more drink. 628 00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:05,040 If you don't want Champagne, don't tell people we're getting married. 629 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,560 I'll just make sure he only gets one bottle. 630 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:11,240 Gosh. 631 00:38:11,240 --> 00:38:13,080 Oh. 632 00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:15,120 So she does know, then? 633 00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:18,160 This is the woman who said she would never get married. 634 00:38:18,160 --> 00:38:20,200 Didn't want to, didn't need to. 635 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:24,240 But now, for financial, legal reasons, here we go, 636 00:38:24,240 --> 00:38:26,280 cos Ollie's dying. 637 00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:28,320 Why not talk about it, then? 638 00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:31,720 I told her about Mum today, 639 00:38:31,720 --> 00:38:34,760 which is inevitably about cancer and tumours, 640 00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:39,640 and she was really lovely, but I didn't feel like I'd hit a nerve. 641 00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:47,760 So what, it's eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die? 642 00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:00,400 (LAUGHTER) 643 00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:03,840 Ollie, thanks for that, really. It was so generous. 644 00:39:03,840 --> 00:39:06,280 It was a pleasure. It was such a lovely dinner. 645 00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:08,320 Any time, honestly. Ollie - 646 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:11,480 The Leith police summarily and arbitrarily dismisseth us. 647 00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:14,400 I'm fine to drive. You've had way too much to drink. 648 00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:16,440 We'll get a cab. From where? 649 00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:18,520 Darling, they don't have taxis out here. 650 00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:21,520 Safe as houses at night, you can see the headlights. Get in. 651 00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,560 I'll take it easy, I promise. (LAUGHS) 652 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:25,600 Em, in the front with me? 653 00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:28,120 Ian, get in the back. 654 00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:29,960 Come on. (GIGGLES) 655 00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:33,040 (GROANS) 656 00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:37,160 (GIGGLES) 657 00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:39,200 Move over. 658 00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:52,640 I had the oysters, by the way. 659 00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:55,840 They're quite nice, if you like hawked up phlegm in sea water. 660 00:39:57,720 --> 00:40:00,880 I don't want you to feel like I'm hiding things from you, 661 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:03,120 but I don't want you missing out either, 662 00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:05,480 because each piece of information matters. 663 00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:10,680 So...why hadn't I told Em about Daisy being sick in the pool? 664 00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:15,160 Well, with Ollie obviously otherwise engaged, 665 00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:17,200 Daisy needed looking after. 666 00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:22,280 So I did what any other friend would. 667 00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:30,360 She had sick all down her, so I couldn't just leave her like that. 668 00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:51,880 And she wasn't that out of it. 669 00:41:06,720 --> 00:41:09,440 Some memories get spoiled when you share them. 670 00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:13,720 (LAUGHS) 671 00:41:31,720 --> 00:41:33,960 I switch off, I have to. 672 00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:37,400 I hear horrendous things sometimes so, when court adjourns, that's it. 673 00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:40,040 I don't think about it again until I'm back in court. 674 00:41:40,040 --> 00:41:42,120 That's what you have to do. I know, I know. 675 00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:45,200 You can't get emotionally involved with clients, it's the pits. 676 00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:48,360 You're right, but it feels like you ought to get involved. 677 00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:51,120 The moment you do, you can't help them as much. Yeah. 678 00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:54,360 Music? Yeah, why not? 679 00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:56,400 Sorry. It's all right. 680 00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,920 Do you want me to get it? You're all right. 681 00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:02,760 (CHUCKLES) 682 00:42:02,760 --> 00:42:05,320 It's... (GIGGLES) 683 00:42:13,920 --> 00:42:15,960 (ROCK MUSIC) 684 00:43:03,480 --> 00:43:05,520 Ian, we're home. 685 00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:13,800 Just you and me now. As it was meant to be. 686 00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:15,840 No-one else. 687 00:43:32,320 --> 00:43:34,480 Ooh, looks like we have another guest. 688 00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:37,440 Darling? 689 00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:41,000 (CHUCKLES) Have you seen this? This is like Hansel and Gretel. 690 00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,240 Aw! (GIGGLES) Daisy, we're here. 691 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:45,280 We have a visitor. 692 00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:49,640 Ian. Ian, we're home. 693 00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:53,000 Oh, no. I do like being with you. 694 00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:55,040 Oh, my God! Do you know who that is? 695 00:43:55,040 --> 00:43:57,080 It's Milo. Milo! 696 00:43:57,080 --> 00:43:59,400 I couldn't stay away. Milo, hello! 697 00:43:59,400 --> 00:44:01,760 It's Milo, one of Daisy's clients. 698 00:44:01,760 --> 00:44:04,280 I think I told Ian he might be coming. EM: OK. 699 00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:07,120 MILO: It's so good to see you. Look at you! 700 00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:09,160 (GIGGLES) 701 00:44:12,200 --> 00:44:14,240 It's so good to see you. 702 00:44:14,240 --> 00:44:16,280 I didn't think you'd make it. 703 00:44:17,320 --> 00:44:19,360 Oh, it's so great. 704 00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:21,920 Hope I'm still invited. 705 00:44:21,920 --> 00:44:24,200 Of course you are. 706 00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:26,240 You don't need an invite. 707 00:44:26,240 --> 00:44:27,880 (GIGGLES) 708 00:44:34,600 --> 00:44:37,040 Ian, tennis, round two. (GRUNTS) 709 00:44:38,240 --> 00:44:42,240 This is a triathlon. We're meant to test ourselves against each other physically. 710 00:44:42,240 --> 00:44:45,400 You enjoyed it. You enjoyed him leaning on you. You fancied him. 711 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:47,040 Come here. Get off me. Come here. 712 00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:50,120 Spare a thought for Ollie, as he didn't like this guy being around. 713 00:44:50,120 --> 00:44:52,600 (SHRIEKS) Where's your wife, Milo? 714 00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:56,600 itfc subtitles 52429

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