All language subtitles for The Last Horror Film (1982).en

- Ohhh.

- It's awful.

Let's leave.
- Weirdo.

- Crazy Vinny, what are
you readin' about, Jana?

How's Jana doin', Vinny, eh?

- Ah, leave him alone.
- This guy's really crazy,

you know?
- Hey, Vinny!

- Hey, why don't you stop dreaming, Vinny?

For Christ's sake, wake up
and get smart to yourself.

- Jana Bates, sure she's
the queen of horror films.

She's fantastic!

Not because of Alan Cunningham,
though. He's no director.

Wait till she works with me,
then we'll both win an Oscar.

- Lights... Camera...
Action!

"The Life of Vinny Durand,"
final take.

- Ladies and gentlemen,

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and
Sciences proudly presents

Mrs. Jana Bates.

- And now, ladies and gentlemen,

the award for the "Outstanding
Achievement by a Director,"

and this coveted prize,
goes to a man of true genius,

a wizard of the cinematic arts,
and it is Mr. Vinny Durand.

- Get smart to yourself.
Stop dreaming, man.

- Hey, Vinny, when are
you gonna make that film

with Jana, huh?
- Hey, Vinny?

- Shut up!
- Tell us how you feel.

Hey, come on, Vinny.

Get outta here! You're nothin'
but a bunch of creeps.

Nothin' but a bunch of creeps!

- Come on, Vinny, we wanna talk to you.

Where you goin', now?
Vinny, come on back!

- Bye-bye, Vinny!

- Bye-bye!

- Vinny Durand, you're on your way, man.

Cannes Film Festival, here I come.

- Hi, Ma.

- Hi.
- How are you?

- You're home early.
Are you all right?

- Yeah, I'm fine. Couldn't feel better.

I got my ticket and I'm
goin' to the south of France.

The Cannes Film Festival, Ma!

And I'm gonna make my
film with Jana Bates.

- Vinny, stop thinking
about those crazy ideas.

You'll only get yourself upset again.

I made baked macaroni.
You don't eat right.

More protein, you won't
have so many crazy ideas.

- Look, Ma, I don't know
why the ideas are so crazy,

you know, just ‘cause I wanna
make my film with Jana Bates.

She wouldn't think my ideas are crazy, Ma.

- It's wrong for you to be thinking
about Jana Bates day and night.

Why don't you be happy
just driving the cab?

- Because I got talent, Ma!

I'm gonna be a great director some day!

- Don't yell at your mother.

- Nobody, nobody's gonna get in my way.

- Here's some baked macaroni.

- Oh, thanks, Ma, but I'm not
hungry right now.

Please, you understand.
- Sure.

- You make some
when I come back. Look...

Louie D's gonna take care of the cab,

and, don't worry, he'll give
you money and everything, okay?

- Why are you doing this, Vinny?

- I don't know, Ma.
Why do I have to do anything?

I just have to do my thing.

Just say a prayer for me
while I'm gone.

I love you, Mom.

- Goodbye.

Oh, Vinny, you're such a dreamer.

- Didn't I tell you, Vinny?
I come here for the chicks.

This is the best damn hunting
ground I've ever found!

And they all think I'm a rich Texan.

- Thanks for the lift, Tex.

- You stick around here,
boy, you'll have the time

of your life.
- Thanks anyway,

but I've got things to do.

- Sure you won't change your mind?

- Well, uh, appreciate the lift.

- Oh, hey, man, I really
could use a drinking buddy.

I mean, these chicks here
always travel in pairs.

- Yahoo! Ride them, cowboy!

- Whoo-hoo!

I love the movies!

- And now, NOVA Radio,
the English language voice

of the French Riviera,
brings you the news.

The free world is still in shock

following the unsuccessful
assassination attempt

upon the life of President Ronald Reagan.

Doctors attending the
70-year-old chief of state

listed his condition as
guarded but expressed optimism

that Mr. Reagan would
make a complete recovery.

Meanwhile, reports have
leaked from the FBI,

which link the alleged
assassin, John Hinkley,

with film actress Jodie Foster.

An FBI source said that Hinkley
had written several letters

and placed long distance
phone calls to Ms. Foster

at her residence at Yale University.

Hinkley's obsession with Ms. Foster

allegedly began after seeing
her in the film "Taxi Driver,"

in which she played a teenage prostitute.

Ms. Foster was unavailable for comment.

- This performance is by far the best.

- Absolutely brilliant.

- Jana Bates is just absolutely the queen

of horror movies.

- Now, NOVA Radio
brings you the news.

Locally, the 34th Annual
Cannes Film Festival

will get underway today, as once again

the luminaries of the
international film industry

pack themselves into that
small coastal resort town.

Due to the rash of terrorist acts
that have scarred Europe,

most notably yesterday's shooting
of Pope John Paul Il in Vatican Square,

festival authorities have
increased security precautions.

And now, we switch you to
our show business reporter

on the scene, Roving Rona.

- This is Roving Rona on the scene.

The hottest ticket in town is an invite

to the private soiree producer Bret Bates

is throwing tonight to honor his star

and once-upon-a-time wife, Jana Bates.

Jana is said to be a
front-runner for Best Actress

for her chilling performance in "Scream,"

the smash horror flick
produced by Bret Bates

but directed by Jana's new love

and constant companion, Alan Cunningham.

Talk about a love triangle.

Sparks may fly tonight
at the Studio Circus.

Who, you might ask, will be
around to pick up the pieces

of Jana's career after
Bret and Alan fight it out?

All this reporter can
say is, "Look out, Jana."

- Excuse me, Mr. Bates?

Mr. Bates, do you remember me?
My name is Susan Richards.

- Sure I do, Susan.

- I'm starring in
Stanley Kline's new film.

- Hmm-mm.

- I have a project I'd
like to discuss with you,

if you've got the time.

- I'd like to discuss it with you, Susan.

- Mr. Bates, I'm talking about business.

- So am I, honey.

- Well, let go of me, I'm
not one of your starlets.

I'm not on the beach
topless and walking down

the Croisette.

- You are too charming, Monsieur Bates.

- Good luck, sweetheart.

- Yes, it is true, Alan and I are in love,

and I happen to think
he's a wonderful director.

- So where does
that leave Bret Bates?

- Well, uh...
- Mr. Bates

is still Jana's producer.

Perhaps you gentlemen
will excuse us now.

We just wanna have a little dance.

Thank you.
- Thank you.

- Please let me in.
- No, sorry, it is not possible.

Hello.

Hi, bonsoir, hello.

Sorry.

- What about over here?
Come on, will ya?

- No, no, you cannot go in, no.

- Damn it.

Eh, you're a bunch of creeps.
Who needs you anyway?

I don't need you, I've been
in better places than this!

- Good evening, mademoiselle.
I'm doing a study from articles.

I want to examine the
psychological effect

of the horror films on the public.

Many people still believe
that repeated viewings

of these films is warping the
minds of you young people.

Now, my study--
- Hey, Lisa,

come on, let's go to the party.

- Come here!
Come here, Lisa!

- You little shit.

- You know, Marty,
I tell you, the timing

of my film's perfect.
Horror's really in right now.

Bret Bates got lucky.
Did a couple pictures

with Jana just before the whole
fantasy thing really took off.

- Stanley, I know it,
and you know it.

Bret Bates is a lucky ass.

As far as I'm concerned, he
parades that macho stud number

of his just a little too
hard and much too often.

Bet you didn't know
he had a thing going

with Greg from my office.

And from what I hear,
he hates Alan's guts.

- You agents, you always
have to bring it down

to that level, don't you?

- You think that's something, Stanley?

You wouldn't believe some of
the things I've got on you.

- A bunch of decadent bastards.

Who do they think they're
dealing with, anyway?

I'm Vinny Durand, man.
I'm Vinny Durand.

Someday, they'll be sorry.
I don't need their stupid party.

They're gonna be sorry.

- Look at them, pretending like
they really like each other.

It's an act just for the photographers.

Deep down, they really
hate each other's guts.

I'll tell you something, Lee.

- What?

- Bret's gonna get bounced by
the two of them for sure.

- And that'll make a lot of people happy.

- Hello?
- Ms. Jana Bates, please?

- She's not here.
- Look, I know she's there.

I've got to talk to her.

You tell her she better talk to me,

because I'm going to make her the
greatest actress that ever lived.

I've got the perfect movie for her.

- Look, I don't know who
you are, but if this is about

a script, forget it.
- It is about a script.

- I produce all of Jana's films
and I don't read anything

unless it comes through an agent.

- I don't have an agent, but I--
- Got that?

- What's wrong with the switchboard?

I told them to screen all my calls

regarding Jana's business.
They let some kook through.

- This is for Jana Bates.
- Merci.

- "You've played your last
horror film. Goodbye."

- Hmm.
- What a strange note.

Alan, are you sure you won't
go with me to see Bret?

- No, not on your life.

If he wants to see me, he'll invite me.

Besides, I've got a feeling
he's upset about us.

- He's not upset about anything.

As long as he's got his
money and his young girls,

he's happy, believe me.
- Yeah, I've noticed.

- Yeah.

- Por Monsieur Bates.

- Monsieur Bates?
- Oui.

Take it out.

What is this, a threat?

Who sent it?

- Je ne sais pas, Monsieur.
Au revoir.

Hmm, looks like it's gonna
be an interesting festival.

- There she is.

- Smile, Jana, baby!
Yeah, that's it, yeah.

- Thank you, thank you. Hello.

Thank you, thank you.
Hello, hello. Yes, hello.

Bret? Bret?

It's Jana.

Bret?

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

Bret?

Bret!

Oh, Bret! Bret, oh!

- Look, you can never know
until you read a script

exactly what kind of part it is.

It's a fabulous part for Jana,
and it's not a horror picture.

- Look, this is the deal, okay?

We'll distribute the picture,
we'll also finance it.

I'll produce the picture
and you direct it.

Jana stars in it, but no Bret Bates.

We will not deal with Bret Bates.

- I don't think there's any way around it.

- Believe me, there's a way
to get rid of Bret Bates.

Drink up. Cheers.

- I can't believe it.
- Excuse me. Excuse me.

What is going on?
What happened to Bret?

- I don't know. It was his head...
Oh, God!

- We called the hotel right
after Ms. Bates arrived,

and the manager,
who is a friend of mine,

checked personally the room of Mr. Bates,

but there was no Mr. Bates,
dead or alive.

- I don't know...
- Excuse me.

- I know I saw him, I know!

- Jana, Jana, are you sure?

I mean, do you know he was dead?

You know and I know
he's a practical joker.

- Alan... Alan, I swear
he was dead. I know.

I've seen enough fake blood
to know the real thing

when I see it.

- Okay, you've had a really bad shock.

I just hope he's not
playing some stupid game.

- What are we gonna do?
- I'm sure the police

are doing everything they can.
Let's just get out of here.

I've got something that'll
help calm you down.

- Well, what are you talking about?

Damn it, you don't
believe me either, do you?

- Okay, okay, I'm telling you,
he's probably up

in the room with a bottle of champagne

and a silly-ass grin on his face.

Would you like a drink?

- Alan, I think there was
a note attached to him.

- I still think it's some kind of a joke,

a sick joke, and it's more
of Bret's nonsense.

Trust me, I'll get to the bottom of it,

but for now forget about
Bret and forget about

his special effects.

- Oh, God...

- This is NOVA Radio with the news.

Financial turmoil gripped France today

following the election of
Francois Mitterand,

the first socialist
president since the founding

of the Fifth Republic.

Securities prices tumbled,
the franc came under

heavy speculative pressure,
and the price of gold soared.

And now we switch you to
our show business reporter

on the scene.

- Caught you, you naughty boy.

Does your mommy know what you're doing?

Don't be afraid, we won't hurt you.

Oh, I got it. All action, no talk.

Why don't you get your friend?
You know, the cowboy,

and we'll go for a little swim.

Forget it, creep. Get lost.

Forget it, girls, he's
just like a little boy.

He doesn't wanna play,
he just wants to watch.

- Your movie must
have driven him crazy!

- Hey, weirdo!
He's just a frustrated fan.

- I know I saw Bret murdered.
And you and everybody else

are trying to pretend it didn't happen.

Just take a look at this.

- Oh, yeah, definitely made the headlines.

I think the worse thing
we can do right now

is to overreact.

- So as long as I can pretend
not to believe my own eyes

and forget about it, then we
can live happily ever after.

Is that what you want?

- Jana, even you said that
you ran straight back out.

How do you know what you really saw?

Anything to do with Bret
is automatically suspicious,

especially a disappearing act.

- I'm actually starting to doubt myself.

But tell me, why would Bret want to
do something like that? Why?

You know, I really think it
could be a promotion stunt.

It's right down his alley.

- Alan, I've got to get the
hell out of here, please.

- All right.
- Ms. Bates?

Yes, could I have another smile?

- Give him just one more smile.

- Hold it, yes... Great.

- Mr. Martin Bernstein?

Your call is ready to Stanley Kline.

- Thank you.

- Pardon, Monsieur, Vinny Durand.
- Yes, your call will be next.

- Hello? Hello? It's me, Marty.

Yeah, yeah. You? Fantastic.

Listen, about that Lilly Mars deal,

I have to get 35Gs for Lilly Mars

and she's gotta have a car and a driver.

Are you kidding? She loves grisly movies.

Listen, Stanley, if you
wanna be a real smart cookie,

use Lilly in the lead,
not the old lady part.

Well, okay, okay, okay.

25Gs, but I want it up front
in the bank before she starts.

It's a deal.

B movie bastard.

- Excuse me, Mr. Bernstein.
You're Lilly Mars' agent, aren't you?

I think she's really great.
Look, I'm making this movie,

it's a perfect picture for her.

I've got this really great part.

- Get lost, will ya?
- Mr. Durand.

Your call is ready. You have to take it
or give up your place.

Yes, operator, could you place
my call to the States, please?

No, not the one to California.
The one to New York, yes.

212 area code, 392-2304.

Merci beaucoup.

Hello, Mom?
- Hello, Vinny?

- Listen, Mom, are you sitting down?

‘Cause I got great news for you.

Jana Bates is going to
star in my next movie.

It's all set.
I'm producing and directing.

- Vinny, are you sure
you're making a movie?

- Look, Mama, would you please
just believe me for once?

- You're going too far now, Vinny.

You and your crazy ideas.

Are you sure you're all right,
Vinny? You sound so crazy.

Speak up, dear.
I can't hear you, Vinny.

- I can't hear you, Vinny,
you'll have to speak louder.

- Who are you?
- That's better.

Now tell us why you're
such a failure, Vinny.

- I'm a genius. Jana Bates
is going to star in my movie.

She loves me!

- You couldn't get Jana
Bates to talk to you.

Talk to you, talk to you.

- Hello, Vinny?

Vinny?

- Please.
- Inspector Murrat--

- Mareille.
- Mareille, whatever.

Bret Bates got a note like
this before he disappeared.

Now, what we want is protection.

You don't think we're
making this up, do you?

- Quite frankly, yes.

He is a famous producer of horror movies.

His ex-wife is a famous
star of horror films,

and only she saw the body.

Now everyone is talking about it.

So, personally, I think it could
be a great publicity stunt.

Perhaps the greatest we have ever had.

Now, be satisfied and let us
get back to the real problems,

like traffic congestion.

- Marty Bernstein! Marty Bernstein!

Marty Bernstein!
Message for Marty Bernstein!

- Over here.

Thanks.
- Monsieur.

I thought he'd run out
on me, the sly bastard.

Disappearance, my ass. He was
setting me up the whole time.

Thanks. I mean, merci.

Star Theater, huh?

Hello? Hello, Bret?

It's me, Marty!

Hey, I got your message, man,
came for my money.

Come on, lay it on me.

You always were theatrical, Bret,

but, man, you're blinding me.

Bret?

Hey, you know, you
certainly had us all fooled.

I gotta hand it to you, you sly fox.

A lot of people received these notes.

"You've made your last horror film."
Pretty frightening, Bret.

- Hello, Mom?

No, nothing's wrong.
I just wanna say hello.

Look, I'm at the marketplace right now,

and everybody wants my film.
They love it, yes.

Jana and I did the
greatest scene yesterday.

Oh, you would have loved it.
Really, we're getting closer

and closer to one another all the time.

I'm fine, Mom, just fine.
Yes, I'm fine.

Look, Ma, I gotta go.
Look, I'm doing an interview.

Yes, I have plenty.
I love you, too, Ma.

- Hi, let me in.
- Non, non, non, monsieur.

- I got my pass.

- Non, non.
- I got some francs.

You want some francs?
- Non, non, monsieur.

- How come you won't let me in there?!

What the hell you lookin' at?!

- Hello.

Thank you.

- Thank you very much.
- Thank you.

Thank you for coming.

Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Jana Bates.

- Doesn't all the violence in
in these horror pictures get to you?

We know it's all make-believe,
an illusion,

but sometimes it all seems too real.

- Well, a lot of people seem
to enjoy watching the news,

which is much more horrific
than any film I've ever seen.

It's the real violence in
life that's unbelievable.

- But, Ms. Bates,
you're amazingly popular,

don't you have any fears
that you might become

the obsession of some fanatic?

And if so, have you taken
any security precautions?

- Not really. I believe
that people understand

the difference between
real life and illusion,

that I'm just an actress
playing a part in a movie.

- But don't you think that art sometimes

finds its way into being
imitated in real life?

I mean, look at that
Hinckley-Reagan incident,

and the fellow that shot Lennon.

- Art is also an imitation of life.

No matter how you look
at it, there's a definite

animalistic side to every human being.

I think this sick young man, Hinckley,

might have tried to shoot President Reagan

whether he'd seen the
film "Taxi Driver" or not.

- Are you saying
that movies have no effect

on the violence that we see in society?

- I don't think it's created it.
At best, they only reflect it.

- You're actually in Cannes, Ms. Bates,

to promote a horror film, aren't you?

- That's right, yes.
It's called "Scream."

- Well, that should sell a lot of popcorn.

- Okay, thank you very much for coming.

We appreciate it very much
and we'll see you real soon.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- Ms. Bates, can I
have a picture, please?

Big smile. Yes, nice close-up.
Lovely, lovely.

- You're terrific, Jana.
- Thank you.

- Thank you.
- Thank you, lovely.

Thank you very much.
- Thank you.

- You think they like me?

- Oh, they love you. You're a star.

- Why did they all leave?

- They went off to love another star.

- Please.

Un dollar.

- Forget it, creep.

- Creep! Somebody get
this guy out of here.

- No, no, no, I love you Jana, no, please.

- Won't you control
your customers, goddamn it?!

- Please, I love you, Jana,
please, please.

- What's the matter with you?

- Please, I love you, Jana, please!

- This is NOVA Radio news.

Violence is the headline around the world.

In Madrid, two policemen are
killed by a terrorist bomb,

and there are reports of plots
against the life of King Juan Carlos.

In New York, three bombs were
discovered within 20 hours

in Pan American World Airways,

Kennedy International terminal.
One bomb exploded,

killing a 20-year-old man.

In Rome, the accused
assassin of Pope John Paul ll

told Italian magistrates
that he had considered

killing the Queen of England,

Secretary General of the
United Nations Kurt Waldheim,

and Simone Vile, President
of the European Parliament,

before deciding to make
the pontiff his target.

Now for the local news.

The disappearance of two
prominent participants

in this year's Cannes Film Festival

has local authorities baffled.

Two Americans,
film producer Bret Bates

and flamboyant theatrical
agent Martin Bernstein,

seemed to have vanished under
mysterious circumstances

after allegedly receiving
anonymous threatening messages.

And now, we switch you to our
show business reporter on the scene.

- And some of these. Thank you.

Pardon. Pardon.

- I love it.

Morel!

- Great stuff. Hell of a killing.

- Mais oui!

- Oh, excuse me.

Hey, wait a minute, aren't you
Stanley Kline the director?

- Hey, I'm really just leaving.

- "A Caller in the Night"?

- Right, right. Why aren't
you at the screening?

- I just did go to the screening.
I saw the screening.

It was disgusting! It made me sick!

It made everybody sick!

- You're crazy, man. You're crazy.

- You shouldn't be allowed to
make films like this, Stanley!

You'll get yours.

- And now, the early morning news.

Local police in Cannes have
asked for help from Paris,

following the discovery
of the mutilated body

of famous agent and entrepreneur,
Martin Bernstein,

who disappeared recently under
mysterious circumstances.

Dental records sent from Los
Angeles enabled the police

to identify the body.

The very real possibility
that a mad Killer

might be on the loose at the
International Film Festival

has sent a wave of panic through Cannes

and many guests are packing
their bags and planning

early departures.

Festival officials are doing all they can

to increase security and have
issued a call to the public

to avoid panic.

- Stanley, I've
made plane reservations.

I'm going home.
- What are you talking about?

We've only been here for a couple of days.

- I know that.

- Look, I think we should
relax and take it easy here.

I mean, you can't just get on the plane
and go back right away.

That's crazy.

- There's a maniac
running loose in this town

and I'm obviously on his list.

The note I got is exactly
like the note Bret Bates got

and he's missing.

They found the same note
in Marty Bernstein's room.

- Okay. Tomorrow morning,
I'll take you to the airport

and you can get out of here.

But before you go,

I have a very special place
I'd like to take you to.

- It's incredible. What is it?
- Don't ask any questions,

you'll ruin my surprise.
Come on.

- Stanley, why are you pulling me?

You're hurting me.
- Come on, come on,

just a bit further.

- Stanley, you're really acting weird.

What are we doing here?
This place is closed.

We shouldn't be here.

- This is so special. We're all alone.

Look at that tower.

- Yeah. Is that my surprise?

- Just the beginning of it.
Let's go.

You're gonna love my surprise, Susan.

Come on, come on, close your eyes.

It's your last night.
Close your eyes. That's it.

- I don't want to close my eyes.

- Okay, here we go. Oops, watch
yourself. Come on, come on.

Sit down, there's a bench right here.

- Where?
- See, there's a bench.

I want you to sit down.
Just stay right there.

Keep your eyes closed. That's it.

- This is ridiculous. I don't want
to keep my eyes closed, Stanley.

What are you doing with that?
- Nothing.

Boy, you sure are jumpy, you know?

I was just gonna put my initials
and your initials in this bench.

You know, like when you're a little kid.

Come on, just don't look,
don't look. Look out there,

look at that beautiful view.
- I don't want to.

- Just stay there.

Now, the surprise is if you
wanna get your surprise,

you're gonna have to find me.

- Stanley, I don't wanna play this game.

Stanley? Stanley, where are you?

Let's get out of here. Stanley?

This isn't funny anymore.
I'd like the car keys, please.

- Hey, Susan.
- Damn you, Stanley.

Stanley? Stop this, Stanley.
Come on, I know you're in here.

Goddamn you, Stanley. I'll
never forgive you for this.

Stanley?
- Come on, Susan.

Up the stairs.

- Stanley, I know you're there.

I'd like to go home now.
Please, Stanley?

God, Stanley. Stanley,
you're frightening me.

Please come out.

Ah, so this was the surprise,
after all.

You might have told me, Stanley.
You scared me half to death.

Where are you?

Oh, Stanley, dramatic till the end.

- Hello, Mom?
- Vinny, I read

about Jana in all the newspapers.

- What?
- Why don't they mention

your name, Vinny?
- We're getting along great, really.

Lots of interviews,
everyone wants to talk to us.

Mom, they love us.
- What are you doing

over there?

It's taking you so long.
- No, Mama, I'm all right.

Please, Mama, won't you
listen to me, just this once?

Hold on, Ma.

Okay, I'll be right there.

Look, Ma, I gotta go right now.

Yes, I swear, everything's okay.

Mom, I'm going to be famous.

Can you stop laughing at me?

Because I'm good,
I have real talent.

- Vinny Durand? I wouldn't
hire him to shine my shoes.

- The man has no talent.
- The stupid asshole

couldn't direct an Army training film.

- Vinny Durand, your work
has no romance, no soul,

no style and no grace.
No grace, Vinny!

No grace.

- I hate you. I hate you.
I hate you. I hate you.

You'll see, you'll be proud of me.

- I love you, Vinny.
- I love you, too.

- Take care of yourself,

and don't forget to call.

Bye, Mom.

- Who is it?!

Ms. Bates, please don't be
frightened. I won't hurt you.

But I just wanna talk about the film.

Look, I read where you liked
this kind of champagne.

- Who are you? Get out!

- I thought we'd just have a drink
and talk about the film.

You'll be absolutely perfect in it.

You know, I've tried so hard to reach you,

but they never let me talk to you.

They never even realized
what a great talent you have.

They misuse you, but please
believe me, I'll make you happy.

- Please get out.
- No, no, no,

you don't understand how
long I've been trying to--

- I said, get out. Now!

Get out! Get out! Get out...

- Ms. Bates, please...
- Get out.

- You don't understand me!

It's always been that way for me.

I just want to tell you about the film.

I think that look would look
great in the graveyard scene.

And I think that every side
of your face is the best side.

I've seen thousands of photos
and your films hundreds

of times, but of course, as
your director, that's my job.

Could you move your head a
little to the right, Ms. Bates?

Perfect, just perfect.

You take directions perfectly.

You're my star.
- No.

- Who's there, what's going on?

- No!
- Ms. Bates!

- Ms. Bates?

Hey!

Help me! Help me!

Help me!

No, no!

- Jana, please!

Jana, let me in!

Let me in! Jana,
you don't understand!

Jana!
- He's after me!

Doesn't anybody hear me?

- Jana!

- Ms. Bates! Please!
- Help mel!

- You don't understand, I
don't mean you any harm!

Please, would you wait?
- Help mel!

- Ms. Bates!
- Look!

Another publicity stunt.
- What a cute idea.

- Well, great, great.

- He's trying to kill me. Help me!

- Get out! Now!

No!

Help! Somebody...

Help me!

- Jana Bates!
- He tried to kill me!

He's after me!

- Is this part of your movie?

- Mr. Cunningham, we are waiting.
Where is Ms. Bates?

- Help!
- Hey, Jana baby, over here!

- Help mel!

- Hot damn, that's Jana Bates!

- Somebody's trying to kill me!

- What the hell are you doing?
- He tried to kill me.

- Who tried?
- God, it's her!

What a fabulous entrance!
- You're not making any sense.

- In the bathroom!
- Jana!

- What's happened?

- Let me get you out of here.
Come on.

- All right, give me
some room here, let me see

what's going on.

- Jana, what's going on in there?

- Okay, get us to the hotel, quick.

- Is she bleeding?
- She's driving away.

- Here, just take these.

Hi, Jonathan? Yeah, it's Alan.

No, I'm afraid I got a
real serious problem.

No, we're okay. It's
just that I need a couple

of security guys here right now.

Oh, great. Well, I'll try
to explain it all later.

Yeah, so long.

You okay?
- Yes.

- I guess I've been real stupid
about this, haven't I?

Are you gonna be able to
talk to the police?

- I think so, yes.

- Tomorrow we're gonna go
up to Jonathan's castle.

He says it's beautiful.
It's got a great pool.

We could relax and then
we'll come back

on the awards night.

- Morning, Mr. Cunningham,
Ms. Bates.

- Morning, thanks.
- Thank you.

- Okay, let's take off.
- Right behind you.

Don't drive too fast.

- Amazing place.
- Isn't it?

Come on, let's go find Jonathan.

- Hey, look who's here.

Yeah, it's Jana and Alan.
Good to see you.

- All right, girls.

Hey, Alan, Jana.
- How you doing, Jonathan?

- Very well.
- How's the rock and roll

business?
- Very, very good indeed.

It's a good idea you came today,

‘cause we're off to Nassau
to do some recording.

We're shuttin' the whole place down,

but you're welcome to stay.

- Well, we've gotta
get back tomorrow night

for the awards.
- Yes, thanks

for letting us stay, though.

- Listen, what was it that
went down in Cannes, anyway?

- I'm sorry.

- I gotta have a place for
Jana to lie down. Do you mind?

- Of course, of course, no problem.

Melissa, love, look will you
do me a favor?

- Hmm-mm.
- Would you take them

up right away and show them their room?

- Okay.
- Thanks a lot, love.

Listen, I'll catch you later, okay?

- Okay, thanks a lot, Jonathan.
- Take care.

- First that thing with Bret,
then that madman last night.

I suppose now you finally believe me.

But is it all worth it?

- Everything all right, Lou?
- Yes, sir, Mr. Casey.

Everything's fine.
- Okay, well, look.

Why don't you go take a break
and get something to eat?

I'm gonna take a walk, get some fresh air.

- Thank you, sir.
- Catch you later.

- I'll be back in one half an hour.
- Okay.

- How do you know someone
like Jonathan, anyway?

I don't get a very good feeling about him.

- Why not? He's a nice enough guy.

Made a fortune in the music business,

now he wants to spend a
fortune in the film business.

- I don't know, this place
gives me the creeps.

- You get the creeps takin' a piss.

- This is perfect.
- Hey, what's that?

- I don't know. Let's check it out.

Look, over there!

- Look out, he's got a gun!

- Keep the door locked
and don't let anyone in.

- What the hell?

- What are you shooting at?

- It was a prowler. He had a gun.

- Did you see what he looked like?

- No, too dark.
- Let's get out of here.

- I don't understand, why
are we rushing away, Alan?

We never even said goodbye
or thank you to Jonathan.

- Never mind that. All I want you
to think about is tonight's

awards ceremony.
- Oh, Alan,

I don't know if I can make it.

- Ah, I've taken care
of everything, darling.

Now, if you remember,
there was a girl at the airport

who looked a great deal like you.

- Yes.
- Well, I've arranged

for her to act as your decoy tonight.

The police have made
special security for you.

They're taking this Bret Bates
business very seriously.

- And now, the news.

Tight security surrounds
tonight's awards ceremony

in Cannes.

Two more guests of the
festival have been discovered

brutally murdered.

The bodies of director
Stanley Kline

and actress Susan Archer, both
Americans, were discovered

this morning mutilated and
hidden among the garbage

outside of a restaurant kitchen.

Authorities are now admitting
the anonymous threats

received by all the victims
before their disappearances

were not a publicity stunt
at all but the warnings

of a deranged Killer.

Still missing is producer Bret Bates,

who police believe may
have been the first victim

of the murderer.

- Dust to dust and ashes to ashes.

It's a masterpiece.

"Dear Mom. Tonight will be
the culmination of my work.

The highest achievement of my genius.

Now all my dreams are
about to become reality,

captured for eternity on film.

No matter what happens
to me, Mama,

my film will be my immortality.

I've found such a beautiful castle
for the last scene in my film.

"The Loves of Dracula'
will be the greatest

horror film ever made.

Jana will be my bride.
Your loving son, Vinny."

- Over this way.
- Cathy Crosby.

Hold it, Mr. Kristofferson.

Let me get a shot of this,
Mr. Kristofferson.

- Look this way, Ms. Crosby.

- Hold it there.

- Don't worry, Ms. Bates.
You need protection.

Someone's trying to hurt you.

- Here she comes,
it's Jana Bates!

- You look very nice.
- Thank you.

- Please, Jana.
- Over this way, Jana.

Left, please, Jana.

- Oh, hi.
- Good, you made it.

Everything okay?
- Everything's fine.

- Let me just see here.
- Here.

That looks very good.

Okay, Jana, this is Michelle Wagner.
Michelle, Jana Bates.

- I'm so pleased to meet you.
Isn't this exciting?

- Thank you, but do be careful.

- Oh, I will.

Now, didn't I tell you
it'd be okay?

- Yep.

If you will just come with us,
Ms. Bates.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- All right, young lady, are you
ready for your big part?

- Yeah.

- Please wait backstage, Ms. Bates.

You will be safe here.
- Thank you.

- Madame et monsieurs,
ladies and gentlemen,

would you so kindly
give me your attention.

We will begin tonight's ceremonies.

The judges of tonight's
awards have been selected

from distinguished producers,
directors and writers

in the film industry.

The selection of tonight's
winners has been most difficult.

Here are our winners.

This year's award for
"Outstanding Achievement

in Screenwriting" goes to
the team of Kraus Walter

and Helen Stummer of West
Germany for their stirring

depiction of suffering

in the modern technological
environment, "Iron Maiden."

- Thank you, thank you.

- Joanne, could you get me
a glass of water, please?

- Sure.
- Thank you.

- Be right back.

- And now, the
presentation of the award

for "Outstanding Achievement in the Field

of Documentary Cinema,"
this year's winners

are the British filmmakers
Elizabeth and John Kelly

for their stunning vision of civil unrest

in Northern Ireland.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the time has come

to award the prize for "Best Actress,"

and I'd like to point out
that for the first time

in the entire history of
the Cannes Film Festival,

this prize is awarded
to an actress playing

in a horror movie, so
it's my great pleasure now

to call Ms. Jana Bates.

There seems to be a problem
locating Ms. Jana Bates.

Will Mr. Alan Cunningham please
come to the backstage immediately?

Mr. Alan Cunningham,
backstage, please.

Ladies and gentlemen, please be seated.

- Does it look like her lipstick?

- It's the same color. It's gotta be hers.

- We found this jacket
with this note in it.

Here.

Can you understand it?

- "I found such a beautiful castle
for the last scene in my film.

"The Loves of Dracula' will be
the greatest horror film ever made.

And Jana will be my bride.

Your loving son, Vinny."

- I hope you'll forgive me, Ms. Bates,

but someone is trying to kill you.

And the only way I could help you was

to get you away from him.

- Vinny Durand?

- I'll kill you, you mother,
I'll kill you!

- You'll never escape me.

- I'm not you, I'm Vinny Durand.

- You'll never escape me, Vinny.

- I'm not you.
- I'm what you want to be.

- That stupid Vinny... He's
nothing but a crazy fan.

I promise you, Ms. Bates,
he won't bother you anymore.

I can't wait until you see
the set of the last scene.

It's incredible!

I would've never really found it

if you hadn't gone up to
the castle after everyone

left yesterday.

But I've decorated it
so beautifully for you.

Your coffin is set in
red and black velvet.

It's very important, Ms. Bates,
that your death scene

look absolutely real.

Lights...

Camera...

Action.

And now, my beautiful bride,

in the presence of this
human sacrifice and fire,

I, Dracula, the Prince of Darkness,
release you eternally

from your human bondage
here on Earth.

Cut. Print, take one.

You were terrific, Ms. Bates.
I wish you could have seen

the special effects.

I couldn't have done
this movie without you.

You were simply magnificent.

Sorry, Ms. Bates, about making
you feel uncomfortable.

You know, maybe I can
get you a glass of water.

You must be thirsty after this deal,

but it was really worth it.

- Now, isn't this a sweet little picture?

- Who's that?
- Okay, Durand, back off.

- Bret Bates.
- You've done real well,

but it's all over now.

I think it's time I paid you both off

for helping me get rid of
all those insulting bastards.

What's the matter, Jana dear,
surprised to see me?

Yeah, it's me, your loving ex-husband.

You should have known I'd
never let you leave me.

I'd kill anyone who
tried to get in my way.

- Bret, what are you doing?

- And now I'm going to
finish what I started.

You're about to become
this madman's last victim,

and he's about to become a suicide,

and no one will ever be the wiser.

Didn't you love my special effects?

I wish you could have seen it.

The look on your face when you
saw me with a slit throat.

- Please stop.
- I'll never forget it.

In fact, it's all on film.

Fantastic footage, it
would have been my final

opus of horror.

And when this creep showed
up with his obsession for you,

I had the perfect fall guy.
- You're not gonna hurt her.

- Can you believe it?
This guy really was trying

to make a film with you.

- What the--?
- Run, Jana, run!

- No!
- You're not going anywhere.

- No, no.

- Let me go.
- No.

Shouldn't have run off like that, Vinny.
Now I've got Jana.

Want her? You're the
great screen-lover,

come and get her!

Show your ugly face
so I can blow it off.

Come on, Vinny, let's get the final shot.

- Run, Jana, run!
- No!

No!

- You really blew it,
Vinny. Vinny. Vinny.

- You really blew it.

- Alan!

- Vinny, I'm really proud of you.
You finally made your movie.

- Thanks, Ma, but it's the
last horror movie I'll make.

Let me tell you about my next picture.

You got any baked macaroni?
- Nope.

- Anyway, I had this idea.
- Vinny.

- I'm going through space.
- Vinny.

- I'm out there all alone.
- Vinny.

- Jana Bates and me, we're there in space.
- Vinny.

- Anyway, what about
swashbuckling movies?

Anyway, I can think of--
- Vinny!

- What is it, Ma?
- You got a joint?