All language subtitles for Modern Family s10e01 I Love a Parade.eng

T1

Oh, no.

Has it been a year
already?

We love
the Fourth of July.

It's the perfect holiday.

You get to cook outside,
blow stuff up, wear shorts.

Easter should be
taking notes.

Both:
Keep your eyes
on the grand old flag

That was longer
than I remember.

Hello?

Joe, you should be thankful
that you live in this country.

I spent half of my childhood
in a Banana Republic.

It was the only store in my village
that had air-conditioner.

Yes, Mr. President.

Yes, sir, I'd be honored to,
sir. Thank you.

Amazing news.

The grand marshal for today's
parade just got #MeToo'd,

and they need me
to fill in.

Oh, Jay,
I'm so happy for you!

So, now the only thing left
on your bucket list

is to bare-knuckle fight
a Russian!

Ay!

Oh, and Manny's
gonna be back home

from his big road trip
just in time for the parade.

He's been gone for so long.
I can't wait to see him.

That's great!

We'll have the whole family
back together with me

to ride
in the convertible LeBaron.

Joe, how's
your parade wave?

We'll work on it.

--Captions by erfan--

More!

Yeah. I've got time
to help you.

Oh, look at your cousin
being so sweet

and helping out
a friend.

Ugh! Such a weak little coward.
Are we done yet?

No.
It's a really big bridge.

Or maybe you're just
a really tiny man.

Things were going great
on my cross-country drive

until I fell behind schedule

after I developed a perfectly
rational, fact-based fear

of driving over bridges.

I called Cam for support
since he taught driver's ed,

- but he wasn't around.
- what?

Turns out
a strong verbal lashing

was exactly what I needed
to get me across that bridge

and the many others that cover
this country like a cancer.

Okay, Cal.
Let's say hi to Mommy.

Say, "Hi, Mommy!"Whoa, whoa.

if I'm in that shot, back up
a-and turn the lights down.

We had Chinese food last night.
I look like a blowfish.

Okay, you know what, Mitchell?
It's not about you.

I promised we would send
a video of Cal

to my sister
for her birthday,

and that was a week ago,
so we got to get it done.

We have been watching
my big-for-his-age nephew Cal

while my sister Pameron
is --

is back in Missouri
paying off a little debt.

To society.
She's in prison.

For a tiny
parole violation.

She tried something on
in a store

and accidentally
walked out.

It was
another woman's purse.

The silver lining is,

Cal is benefiting from
our parenting experience.

Mitchell is
molding young Cal's brain

while I handle
the young boy's body.

It's a miracle
we're not in prison.

Yeah.

Okay, let's sing the alphabet
for Mommy.

Come on, you and I
worked on this.

6!

You know, I think I put
so much information in there,

it's getting jumbled up
on the way out.

Well, let's -- let's do
some of your stuff.

Throw him a ball
or something.

Oh, okay, yeah.
That's a great idea.

Okay, on the count
of 3, Cal.

Are you ready?
1, 2, 3!

Oh. Okay.

All right, um...
well, hugs!

Hey,
how about a hug?

Aww.
He is such a good hugger.

Okay,
here's the thing --

football camp started
when Cal came.

Then I was laid up

because of that dinner
at Absolutely Crabulous.

Well, don't worry. I've been
slacking on my end, too.

Yeah, but I've been telling Pam
that Cal is thriving here.

We can't send her a video
of him reciting his AB6s!

- I wonder...
- Go on. I'm in.

Is it possible
to shoot him in a way

that makes him look better
than he is?

Oh, honey, are you kidding?
Vin Diesel's a movie star.

Anything's possible
with editing.

What do you got there?

Oh, just choosing some classes
for college.

This one looks interesting.

"In this intensive" Nope.

Drop that!

Game day, buddy.

For the first time ever,
Luke and I are taking part

in the sport of kings,
the savory science.

We're teamed in a parent/child
hot-dog-eating contest.

We've been training for weeks,
and I'm proud to say that Luke,

like his old man, is blessed
with a dogger's mouth.

I felt
something tear inside.

Push through it.

You'll thank me when you start
to feel the gorger's high.

Aah!
What the hell?!

Oh, is the hot dog
making you angry?

An angry stomach is 12% larger.
Boo!

I think
we've got a real shot

to take down
Rhonda and Thandie Hodak.

But they're undefeated.

I guess that makes us
"under-dogs."

Mm. How long
you been sitting on that one?

Not as long as you've been
sitting on that couch.

-Hm.
-Hey, hey.

Can I get in
on that floor bagel?

Alex decided to take off
some time earlier this summer,

and, like everything else
she does,

she did it a little too well.

Who's there?
Did you bring food?

Uh...tomatoes.

But they won't be ready
for six weeks.

You have a backup?

Well, I fell asleep
on my phone,

and I think my face
ordered another one.

You know,
do you want to join me?

You go back to work
in a few weeks.

You'll regret it
if you don't relax a little.

Uh, okay. Sure.

The-- This can wait
10 minutes

until I get him
into the ground, right?

Can you scratch my nose?
I feel like you're closer.

Okay, up on the table

for a little stomach massage
and heckler prep.

Hey, gals, things haven't
been going that great

between me and Arvin,
and he's stopping by

to say goodbye
before leaving for Switzerland.

Could you
take off the onesies

and make it look like we don't
live in an insane asylum?

- You suck!
- You eat like a moron!

Oh, my God!
It's like you want Arvin

to throw his return ticket
off an Alp!

Mm. No wonder
she's so stressed.

She's wearing, like,
a seven-sie.

Haley.
Fancy meeting you here.

- Wait, why? I-I live here.

No, I-I know. I was --
I was making a joke.

It was stupid.

Oh, no, it -- it wasn't stupid.
It was funny.

Well, you didn't laugh.

Well, do it again.
I'll laugh this time.

I'd rather not.

Sorry. I'm just,
um, a little --

I'm really nervous,
and I feel like this goodbye

has so much pressure
on it.

So let's just relax
and be with each other.

I actually have to go.

No, seriously.

I misread my itinerary,

and I have to
get to the airport.

No! So, uh,
this is it?

This is goodbye?

I'm afraid so.

I'm gonna miss you.

I'll miss you, too.

Aww.

That's my car.
I should probably --

Okay.

Uh, well...
goodbye, Haley.

Love you.

Love you, too.

Is he gone?

-Yeah?
-Oh, good.

No one wants
old fuddy-duddy dad

ruining
the big romantic moment.

I'll be upstairs
hiding in Luke's closet.

All right. There we go, Cal.
Chew the peanut butter.

See? Now, with editing,
we can make it look like

he's saying
anything we want --

numbers, the alphabet,
a joke about Jewish people.

Pam loves those.

Movie tricks
come easy to me --

you know, clowns
being naturals at deception.

It's true --
a couple months into dating,

Cam told me
he was a clown,

did a little performance
for me,

and I --
I did feel deceived.

Okay, now,
when I say "action,"

Cal's gonna
throw me the ball.

You're gonna
walk backwards,

and then in editing,
I'll reverse it

to make it look like
Cal's catching the ball

and you're
walking normally.

Why am I
even in it at all?

Remind me of something,
Mitchell -- is the best art made

by a million voices chiming in
or one man with a single vision?

Okay, and we'll lay in
the piano later.

-I have to pee!
-He has to pee.

Okay, he has to pee.
Yep.

All right.
Take five!

Lily,
this is our first cut,

so if you see anything wonky,
let us know.

Oh. Hello, Mommy.

Happy birthday.

1 plus 1 is 2.

Simple math.

I can catch a ball.

How'd you miss the cat?

I didn't.
That take was your best walk.

That is gold.

Why the giant bottle
of wine?

It's for perspective,
and nobody's asking that question.

- Didn't I just ask it?
- Cam.

Yeah, I know.
It's certified rotten.

Luke.

He's only getting 1/3 of the dog
on his first bite.

Anything less than half,
and you're playing for second.

Well, the good news is,
the Fourth is weeks away.

Um...

it's -- it's today.

Toda-- June...?

Yeah -- gone.
Oh.

There you are!
It's almost time for our show.

- Wait -- what are you wearing?
- Clothes?

I got to get back
into school mode

before I lose
my edge.

Mom, you might want to think
about rejoining life

before yourbrain
freezes, too.

Yeah,
don't you worry about...

me.

What's that?

Oh. Um...

Listen.

No dad wants to have this talk
with his son, but...

you're just not
eating enough hot dogs.

I'm sorry.

For some reason,
I just -- I can't focus.

I think what Luke
is trying to say is,

he's too old
for this contest

and he doesn't have the heart
to tell you.

That's impossible. I'm an adult.
I'm still super into it.

Yeah. My 20s should be
my prime hot-dog-eating years.

That was just
my first attempt.

I'm gonna figure this out.
Hang on.

Despite what Alex says,
I have not lost my edge.

Something just clicked.

Fine. You're right --
it's college.

It is?
Yeah.

I'm distracted because
I'm feeling some pressure

on which classes to take.

But don't worry.
I'm gonna figure it out.

Wow.
How could you tell?

I'm just a...
perceptive guy.

I wasn't talking about Luke.
The clicking was in my jaw.

My old TMJ injury was back,
thanks to all the training.

I got it in college
when I bet my roommate

I could out-Frisbee-catch
his golden retriever.

And guess who wo-- Aah!

-Ugh.
-Aw.

Arvin and I
had the worst goodbye.

Aww.It's been such a weird
past couple months.

That long?

It feels like it all started
in the hospital,

after I told him
I loved him.

There you go.

That's it.
You pressured him.

Too much, too soon.Maybe.

Something's
not lining up.

Okay, you're right.

Seriously?!

Something happened in the hospital
while Arvin was gone.

Lost again?

No. This time,
I meantto come back.

I have
some pretty big news.

You should probably
be sitting for this.

O...kay.

I lied.

I'm not married anymore.

My wife left me
for her ex-husband.

I'm a divorc?.

Why are you
telling me this?

Because I'm back in town,
I'm going to nursing school,

and we might
run into each other.

I don't want to
spend the rest of my life

pretending my wife
is in the bathroom.

Yeah, I wouldstart to
worry about her after a while.

Well, I'm sorry
it didn't work out.

It's okay. I don't think
we ever really got each other.

Like, you know how when you and I
used to go to concerts,

we used to just look
at each other and know...

It was time for me
to get on your shoulders

and throw my bra
at the drummer.

Yeah.

Like, you probably
have that with Arvin, right?

Definitely.That's awesome.

With my wife,

she's pretty and smart
and a doctor.

But if you're always
telling yourself

how lucky you are,

it's probably because
you're afraid to ask yourself

how happy you are.

Right?

I brought ice chips.

Or are they
ice frieshere?

Ha.

I can't believe
Dylan got into my head.

I can't believe
he got into nursing school.

That's the biggest one
they got?

Yes, and I'm not
going back again.

Have you seen Manny? I've been
looking all over for him.

I don't see him.

I've been here,
busy inspecting the troops.

Young lady, could you
straighten that hat?

Sir, that -- that horn
could use a shine.

Haircut.

Gloria, if this goes well,
in a couple of months,

I'll be lighting
the town Christmas tree.

- Take that, Dad!
- You know what is weird?

After so many years
at Carniv?�le,

to be at a parade
with people fully dressed.

Gloria, focus.

You've got
a big role in this.

After I cut the ribbon,
it's your job to fire off the cannon.

That's the signal for everybody
to start marching.

But isn't the grand marshal's job
to fire the cannon?

So the ribbon
cuts itself?

Gloria, what you don't know
about parades...

Wait, wait.

Papi! Hello.

Are you coming?
The parade is about to start.

Hey! Jay!

Hey, Tom!
How's it going?

Great, actually.
My wife and I, we're back together.

I-- Well, not exactly.
I mean, we're going on dates.

We're hoping
to recapture --Yeah, yeah.

I want to hear
all about it,

but I think the local paper
needs a photo.

Oh.
O-Of course. Yeah.

Gloria,
get in the shot.

Gloria.

But you promised
that you were going to come.

Just shoot.
No, go ahead -- shoot it.

What? Okay.

No, no, not yet!

Damn it, Gloria!
It's not cutting!

These aren't lefties!

Grand Marshal.
Take that, Grandpa!

You must be
on top of the world.

Well, I'm putting on
a brave face

for the good of the country,
but the truth is,

we did not
get off to a great start.

Gloria is not
on her game today,

and I'm afraid
she's gonna forget

to lead the standing ovation
after my speech.

Hm.
In fact, I'm tagging you in.

Your cue is
"pursuit of happiness."

And if you could sell it,
a "bravo" would be nice.

Okay. I-I know
what's wrong with Gloria.

This is a big day for you,
and she's feeling left out.

No, that's not it.

Damn it.

You're not getting here
till tomorrow?

How does your name
even have the word "man" in it?

Something just clicked.

Jaw trouble?
No!

She was just on with Manny,
who's not coming.

Don't Gloria and Manny have
some Fourth of July tradition?

Come to think of it,

they share a slice of apple pie
and watch the fireworks.

They've been doing that
every year since he was born!

Until thisyear,
which is why Gloria is upset.

Yes!
You're right!

Mm-hmm.
I let the sash go to my head.

I never
should have brought it!

Oh, I can help you out,

but you're gonna have to give up
on your little speech thing.

Hey, kid. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where'd you get the fireworks?

- You a cop?
- Oh, co--

There's a stand in
the grocery store parking lot.

But he's closing up.

You get the fireworks
and the apple pie.

I will take care
of Manny.

I am back.
I am really back!

My car's blocked in.

All this traffic,
I'll never make it.

Look at that --
right there.

Check out! I'm a Shriner.

Cool! Listen,
I need to borrow your car.

It's kind of
an emergency.

But my dad's excited
to see me in the parade.

He was
a Tuskegee Airman.

Maybe the minute
you stop trying so hard

is the minute
he'll start loving you.

Now hop out of there
and go clear a path for me

through those lawn chairs.

Come on.
I'll help you out.But...I don't --

Oh, how about
this one, okay?

Maybe we'll get lucky
and he'll be good at this.

Okay, don't you think
this is a little hateful --

waterboarding a clown
for a prize?Oh, come on.

You guys spray each other
with seltzer all the time.

That's between
two consenting clowns.

All right, one second.
Let's get this.

Okay, go ahead.
Okay.

No. No.
Wrong way, wrong way.Oh, okay, all right, all right, You got to --

-Okay, it's fine.
-You know what?

Maybe it's just time we admit to Pam
we haven't taught him a thing.

You know, I just --
I don't want to let him down.

I-I've come to really enjoy
having him around.

I know, I know.
Me too.

But it's not like
we're bad at parenting.

I mean, Lily turned out to be
a smart, sensitive little girl.

Ugh! You're a disgrace
to this family!

Manny:
I don't think you heard me. I'm over the bridge.

I know.
Now we're just catching up.

Sorry I didn't win.

Oh, no, no, no. You don't
have to apologize, okay?

No, no,
you did just great.

Oh! We'rethe ones
who need to do better.

And you know what?
You give great hugs.

Hey.
We taught him that.

Well, too bad
it isn't exactly a skill.

Yeah.
Or is it?

Mutton busting?!

Why? What is that?

It's a sheep rodeo
for kids.

It's like you didn't even
have a childhood.

Come on!

Announcer: The hot dog contest
is about to begin.

Sorry I'm not
in worse shape for this.

Don't worry about it, buddy.
You've had a lot on your mind.

Any luck
choosing your courses?

Not yet.

I don't really want
to talk about that right now.

Maybe you're putting
too much pressure on --

It's more than just
picking classes, okay?

Can we just drop it and focus
on what we're doing here?

Yeah. Of course.

Exciting to be
in the competition, huh?

Instead of sitting up
in the bleachers, like the last three years?

I guess.

Scary, sure,
but it does feel good

putting our butts
on the line.

You lose 100%

of the hot-dog-eating contests
you don't enter.

Dad, I know
what your bumper sticker is,

and I know
what you're trying to do here.

But college is different.

I mean, you screw up
at community college, you're out of options.

You're not
gonna screw it up.

I've messed up
a lot of things in my life.

I'm scared
I'll do it again.

Good.
What?

Being scared
means you care.

Maybe -- Maybe that's what's
been missing in the past.

It's the biggest thing
I've ever tried to do.

Contestants, ready position.

Just take it
one step at a time.

Don't worry about the 50
to hopefully 75 hot dogs

you're gonna eat.

Just worry about
the dog in front of you.

And wet the buns.

Eat!

Are we sure this is safe?Oh, my gosh, yes.

The kids love it,
the sheep love it.

And I'm pretty sure
it's too late.

Whoa!Hang on, Cal!
Keep hugging!

Oh, my gosh.
Pam is gonna be so excited.

He's already busting
at a first-grade level.

Better get an X-ray.
You got trampled pretty bad.

Looks like
that ankle's broken.

Really, Jerry?

Haley?
What are you doing here?

Well, you tweeted
you were working,

the water tower's in the back
of your Instagram story,

and you just
left a Yelp rating

for that falafel place
around the corner,

so I figured out
where you were.

Could you please stop
being so obsessed with me?

Wait -- what?

That thing that you said
at the hospital?

How if a person felt lucky
to be in a relationship,

that means that
they couldn't really be happy?

Obviously, you did that

to try and ruin
what I have with Arvin,

because
you're not over me.

I seriously don't know
whether to laugh

or check you
for a spider bite.

I'm sorry that you're
questioning your relationship,

but it's not myfault.

Just admit it!

You said that
to try and get back with me.

Look,
in my heart of hearts --

which does not exist,
by the way --

yeah, I still think about us.
We were great.

- Aha!
- Nuh-ha!

You're the one
who drove across town,

paid $12 for parking

and then an additional $2
for the yellow wristband

for beer
and medical tent access.

It sounds like
you'rethe one who's into me.

You're crazy.

There's no crime
in wondering

if we might still
be good together.

I still see us together
in my mind's eye --

which, by the way,
doesn't exist.I can't hear it again.

Diagnosis -- nothing.

How was the parade?

I had something
more important to do.

Apple pie?

I got a few weird looks
at the drive-through,

but it was worth it to
help keep your tradition alive.

You mean Manny and me?

It's not gonna happen,
because --

I've got that covered,
too.

Hi, Mom!
I miss you!

Oh, Jay!
That's perfect!

Oh, it's not
perfect yet.

Should we really give
the dangerous job

to my only smart one?

Ohh!

Happy Fourth of July,
Papi!

I'll be home soon --
before you know it.

Jay: "Thomas Jefferson,

who was sort of
the grand marshal of his time,

believed this country should be
a place where people are free

to pursue happiness
and a better life,

where we can set our sights
on the stars

and, with hard work
and determination...

...make the impossible
a reality.

No!

Because Americans
don't run from challenges.

We embrace them.

God bless America.

Hold for applause."

That would've killed,
right?

Bravo!

You know, I gave up a lot today.
You could mean it.

Never too early to start
training for next year.

Let's loosen up first
with some exercises.

Llama lick. Dizzy Gillespie.
Jiffy Pop it.

Hold it.
And out.

Jiffy Pop --Dad, I don't think I can

ever eat
another hot dog again.

I thought
we might feel this way.

- Hey. You there?
- What?

We're having some trouble
getting these bad boys down.

I'm not surprised,
you pathetic losers.

You two disgust me more than
what's in those hot dogs!

What's the hold-up?

Are we saving our bodies
for bikini season, ladies?

- She's good.
- She better be. She's expensive.

--Captions by erfan--

t3

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