All language subtitles for Garden.State.2004.1080p.BluRay.H264.AAC-RARBG

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:51,167 Los Angeles Tower, this is Transworld 22 Heavy. 3 00:00:51,292 --> 00:00:54,833 We are going down! Repeat, engines two and... 4 00:00:54,917 --> 00:00:56,917 L.A. Tower, this is... 5 00:00:57,042 --> 00:00:59,125 Mayday! Mayday! 6 00:00:59,208 --> 00:01:01,333 22 Heavy, pull up! Pull up! 7 00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:08,333 Andrew, this is your father. 8 00:02:08,417 --> 00:02:10,375 Hello? 9 00:02:12,042 --> 00:02:16,042 Look, you don't call me back, so I don't know how to do this. 10 00:02:18,417 --> 00:02:20,333 If you're not gonna return my calls... 11 00:02:20,417 --> 00:02:23,167 then there's no way for us to communicate... 12 00:02:25,250 --> 00:02:27,333 Look, I don't know how to do this... 13 00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:30,375 but you're gonna need to come home now. 14 00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:33,167 Last night... 15 00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:35,167 Your mother died last night, Andrew. 16 00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:37,833 She drowned. 17 00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,375 Last night, she drowned in the bath. 18 00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:43,709 Ten r�sum�s just today. 19 00:03:43,792 --> 00:03:46,500 They come in every day from Idaho or Milwaukee or Florida. 20 00:03:46,625 --> 00:03:50,250 And you know what they want even more than a guest spot on Everybody Loves Raymond? 21 00:03:50,375 --> 00:03:53,417 They want your job. This cannot happen again. This will never happen again. 22 00:03:53,542 --> 00:03:55,667 You have two tables. You are 30 minutes late. 23 00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:58,334 And if I ever say this again, your job will go to... 24 00:03:58,459 --> 00:04:00,834 Todd Slauson from Duluth, Minnesota. 25 00:04:08,834 --> 00:04:11,000 Sparkling or flat? 26 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:13,667 Waiter 10, do you have your earpiece in? 27 00:04:13,792 --> 00:04:16,792 You forget the order 41 for Table 101. 28 00:04:16,875 --> 00:04:19,167 What the fuck, man? What, are you on break? 29 00:04:19,250 --> 00:04:21,125 Nah, I'm just messin'with you. 30 00:04:21,209 --> 00:04:24,834 Uh, we'll have four Ketel Red Bulls and... 31 00:04:24,959 --> 00:04:28,542 And I'll have a Ketel cosmo with a Red Bull and some bread ASAP. 32 00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:31,625 We don't have bread. 33 00:04:31,709 --> 00:04:34,334 What do you mean? How can you not have bread? 34 00:04:34,459 --> 00:04:38,000 Uh, we're a Vietnamese restaurant. We just don't have bread. 35 00:04:38,084 --> 00:04:40,125 But you're not Vietnamese. 36 00:04:40,209 --> 00:04:43,042 No, I'm not. 37 00:04:44,542 --> 00:04:47,875 Can I have something to chew on? Fuck. Bamboo, whatever. 38 00:04:47,959 --> 00:04:50,000 I'll see what I can find. 39 00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:55,167 Waiter number 12... 40 00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,625 Flight Number 121 with nonstop service... 41 00:04:57,709 --> 00:05:00,834 to Newark International will be departing from Gate 32. 42 00:05:19,542 --> 00:05:25,500 #Thanks for the time that you've given me # 43 00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:31,542 #The memories are all in my mind # 44 00:05:31,625 --> 00:05:34,417 #And now that we've come # 45 00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:38,292 #To the end of our rainbow # 46 00:05:38,375 --> 00:05:44,334 #There's something I must say out loud # 47 00:05:44,417 --> 00:05:48,375 #Yes, you're once, twice # 48 00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:52,375 #Three times a lady # 49 00:05:52,459 --> 00:05:57,667 - #I love you 50 00:05:57,750 --> 00:06:00,875 #Yes, you're once, twice # 51 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:02,000 #Three times a lady # 52 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:05,542 #Three times a lady # 53 00:06:05,667 --> 00:06:10,209 #I love you 54 00:06:10,334 --> 00:06:15,625 #I love you 55 00:06:22,459 --> 00:06:25,167 Shit, yo. 56 00:06:25,292 --> 00:06:27,209 Holy shit. 57 00:06:27,292 --> 00:06:29,625 What's up, man? 58 00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:31,625 Largeman, what are you doing here? 59 00:06:31,709 --> 00:06:35,042 Uh, that's my mom. 60 00:06:35,167 --> 00:06:38,042 - Fuck. - Oh, fuck. 61 00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:40,042 Sorry. 62 00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:42,500 Yeah. 63 00:06:42,584 --> 00:06:46,000 So, welcome back home. 64 00:06:46,084 --> 00:06:47,834 Thanks. 65 00:06:47,917 --> 00:06:50,250 So what have you been doing? 66 00:06:50,375 --> 00:06:52,542 You still, uh, acting and shit, right? 67 00:06:52,667 --> 00:06:55,000 - Yeah. - l-In L.A., right? 68 00:06:55,084 --> 00:06:57,000 - Yeah. - That's cool. 69 00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,000 I hear that place is, like, fucking crazy. 70 00:06:59,084 --> 00:07:02,167 My cousin's a writer out there. Says that place is mad crazy. 71 00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:05,334 He's, like, writing a movie about snowboarders or some shit. 72 00:07:05,417 --> 00:07:07,375 I don't... I don't know. 73 00:07:07,459 --> 00:07:10,542 Um, but I should introduce you to him, Largeman. 74 00:07:10,667 --> 00:07:12,542 Maybe you two could do something together. 75 00:07:12,667 --> 00:07:14,667 Yeah, definitely. 76 00:07:14,792 --> 00:07:17,209 What are you doing tonight, man? 77 00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:21,084 Uh, nothing. No real plans. 78 00:07:21,209 --> 00:07:23,459 I'm just in town for a couple days, so... 79 00:07:23,542 --> 00:07:25,459 You should come out with us. 80 00:07:27,042 --> 00:07:29,750 We're gonna go over the Gleasons' house. They're having some... 81 00:07:29,875 --> 00:07:31,875 fucking huge party or something. 82 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,667 - Supposedly. - Well, yeah. Supposedly. 83 00:07:34,750 --> 00:07:37,334 - Really? - He lives up on the hill. 84 00:07:37,417 --> 00:07:39,625 We'll probably go over there after we bury your mom. 85 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,792 - Well, I got to shower. - Same. 86 00:07:44,167 --> 00:07:47,542 Do you know your mother redid the hallway bathroom? 87 00:07:48,709 --> 00:07:50,584 What? I'm sorry. What? 88 00:07:50,709 --> 00:07:53,584 Since I met her, she never showed an interest in anything. 89 00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:56,000 All of a sudden, a month ago, she wakes up... 90 00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:58,584 she wants to redecorate a bathroom. 91 00:07:58,709 --> 00:08:00,959 I helped her. 92 00:08:01,042 --> 00:08:04,334 - Oh, must have been fun. - Well, I sew. 93 00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:06,334 I made you something. 94 00:08:06,417 --> 00:08:08,292 It's a shirt. 95 00:08:09,375 --> 00:08:11,875 That's... That's good. Thank you. 96 00:08:13,709 --> 00:08:15,792 Will you try it on now? 97 00:08:17,417 --> 00:08:19,334 Now? 98 00:08:19,417 --> 00:08:22,042 In case I have to fix it before you leave again... 99 00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:24,834 and we don't see you for another nine years. 100 00:08:24,959 --> 00:08:26,875 I wanna make sure it fits. 101 00:08:26,959 --> 00:08:29,667 Oh. Okay. 102 00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:32,709 You're gonna love the material. 103 00:08:32,792 --> 00:08:36,834 I used the leftovers from your mother's design. Gorgeous. 104 00:08:53,417 --> 00:08:55,334 Hi. 105 00:08:58,042 --> 00:09:00,875 - Hello. - How you doing? 106 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,834 "Well, besides that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the show?" 107 00:09:04,917 --> 00:09:08,500 You know, I'm not really sure what to say here, Dad, so I'm sorry. 108 00:09:08,625 --> 00:09:11,042 Mm. 109 00:09:11,125 --> 00:09:13,375 How are you? 110 00:09:15,209 --> 00:09:17,542 I'm okay. 111 00:09:17,625 --> 00:09:20,042 I've been getting these really bad headaches though. 112 00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:22,834 Um, they're really quick. 113 00:09:22,917 --> 00:09:26,417 It's like a... just a little lightning storm in my head. 114 00:09:26,542 --> 00:09:28,625 Just for a second, and then it's gone. 115 00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:32,542 I just thought maybe you could help me get that checked out while I'm home. 116 00:09:32,625 --> 00:09:34,834 Go see Dr. Cohen first thing in the morning. 117 00:09:34,917 --> 00:09:37,292 He's a neurologist in my building. l-I'll call him. 118 00:09:37,375 --> 00:09:40,167 He'll fit you in. I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. 119 00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,709 Place looks good. 120 00:09:46,834 --> 00:09:50,500 Oh, that's nice. Yeah, we've been doing a lot of work on it. 121 00:09:50,584 --> 00:09:52,625 Really? 122 00:09:55,209 --> 00:09:58,375 Actually, no. I don't know why I just said that. 123 00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:01,000 Someone redid the, uh, hallway bathroom. I saw that. 124 00:10:01,084 --> 00:10:03,375 Yeah. That's new. 125 00:10:08,292 --> 00:10:10,125 I'm glad you're here. 126 00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:15,084 Saying good-bye is important. 127 00:10:18,542 --> 00:10:20,667 I'm glad you could fit it in. 128 00:11:34,626 --> 00:11:36,834 - Put your hands on your head, please. - What? 129 00:11:36,959 --> 00:11:41,834 I said put your motherfucking hands on your head! Please. 130 00:11:41,917 --> 00:11:43,834 Eighty-two in a 25. 131 00:11:43,917 --> 00:11:46,376 What are you gonna tell me, you're late or just tired? 132 00:11:46,501 --> 00:11:48,376 - I was... - Shut the fuck up! 133 00:11:54,376 --> 00:11:56,376 - Largeman. - Kenny? 134 00:11:56,501 --> 00:11:58,501 Holy shit! 135 00:11:58,626 --> 00:12:00,542 Oh, man. How you doing? 136 00:12:00,626 --> 00:12:02,542 I'm... I'm great. 137 00:12:02,667 --> 00:12:05,042 - Your mom just died! - I know. 138 00:12:05,167 --> 00:12:08,042 - I mean, that's why you're home. - Yeah. Yup. 139 00:12:08,167 --> 00:12:10,334 You're a cop, Kenny? 140 00:12:10,459 --> 00:12:14,042 - Yeah, I know. I know. - Why? 141 00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:17,209 I don't know. Couldn't think of anything better to do. 142 00:12:17,334 --> 00:12:19,209 No, but it's really cool though, man. 143 00:12:19,334 --> 00:12:21,626 People really listen to you. I mean... 144 00:12:21,709 --> 00:12:23,626 they have to! 145 00:12:23,709 --> 00:12:26,626 - Yo, and check this shit out. That's the safety. - Oh, cool. 146 00:12:26,709 --> 00:12:29,376 And plus, the benefits, man. If I get shot, I'm like... 147 00:12:29,501 --> 00:12:31,376 rich! 148 00:12:31,501 --> 00:12:35,001 But, Kenny, the last time I saw you, you were doing coke lines off a urinal. 149 00:12:35,126 --> 00:12:37,584 # La, la, la, la ## No, I had to grow up, man. 150 00:12:37,709 --> 00:12:41,126 It's time to grow up. Plus, I wasn't making shit in that fish market. 151 00:12:41,209 --> 00:12:43,584 No one knew who I was, couldn't get laid. 152 00:12:43,709 --> 00:12:45,751 It's a much better situation for me, man. 153 00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:51,501 Speaking of which, um, how'd I do? 154 00:12:51,626 --> 00:12:53,292 What do you mean? 155 00:12:53,376 --> 00:12:55,501 I don't know. You know, just the whole... 156 00:12:55,626 --> 00:12:57,834 You mean, like, as a cop? 157 00:12:57,959 --> 00:13:00,459 Yeah. The whole, "Shut the fuck up!" 158 00:13:00,542 --> 00:13:03,792 Well, I thought you were a dick, so I guess that's good. 159 00:13:03,876 --> 00:13:06,626 Nice. So, what the fuck, man? 160 00:13:06,709 --> 00:13:09,542 You're this huge movie star now? I heard you did some... 161 00:13:09,626 --> 00:13:11,667 you played a big football player or something. 162 00:13:11,751 --> 00:13:13,876 - I didn't see it. - It was just this thing... 163 00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:16,459 - Fucking De Niro and shit. - What? 164 00:13:16,542 --> 00:13:18,459 - He's awesome. - Yeah. 165 00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:20,459 - Deer Hunter? - Yeah. 166 00:13:20,542 --> 00:13:23,042 Man, we should sit down and we should talk... 167 00:13:23,167 --> 00:13:26,417 because I've got some really good ideas for movies. 168 00:13:26,542 --> 00:13:28,917 You could play me and shit. Poof! 169 00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:31,334 - Stories from the Force. - Yeah. 170 00:13:31,417 --> 00:13:33,917 - Yeah, definitely. That sounds good. 171 00:13:56,834 --> 00:13:58,709 - Holy shit! - What's up? 172 00:13:58,834 --> 00:14:00,709 - How you doing, man? - How you doing, man? 173 00:14:00,834 --> 00:14:03,167 - What's up? - Hey, how you doing? Good to see you. 174 00:14:03,251 --> 00:14:07,292 Get this guy a beer. This guy does not wait for a beer. He's a movie star. 175 00:14:07,376 --> 00:14:09,501 Like, uh, Jersey's De Niro and shit. 176 00:14:11,792 --> 00:14:15,209 - Largeman, man, what are you doing home? - I, uh... 177 00:14:15,334 --> 00:14:17,626 Press junket. 178 00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:20,209 That's phat, yo. Fuck, yeah! 179 00:14:20,334 --> 00:14:23,709 Serpico and shit. "Attica!" 180 00:14:23,792 --> 00:14:26,709 Shut the fuck up, man. 181 00:14:28,376 --> 00:14:30,709 You like that? 182 00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:33,667 Like, uh, "press junket"? 183 00:14:33,751 --> 00:14:36,542 That's improv, bitch. You can use it. Right? 184 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:38,542 Okay. Let me show you something. 185 00:14:44,251 --> 00:14:47,209 Largeman! Oh, whoa! What's going on, man? 186 00:14:48,709 --> 00:14:50,834 How you been? Hey! 187 00:14:50,959 --> 00:14:53,542 - Jess. How are you, brother? - How's it going, man? 188 00:14:53,667 --> 00:14:56,542 I haven't seen you in so long. I heard you're kicking ass. 189 00:14:56,626 --> 00:15:00,126 Oh, um, basically the man bought my silent Velcro patent. 190 00:15:00,209 --> 00:15:02,834 - What? - I developed this little item. 191 00:15:02,917 --> 00:15:05,167 It's just like Velcro, but it doesn't make that... 192 00:15:05,251 --> 00:15:07,834 the Velcro noise. 193 00:15:07,959 --> 00:15:10,709 - So how much did they buy it for? - A lot, man. 194 00:15:10,834 --> 00:15:13,709 Wow. So wh-what are you doing with yourself? 195 00:15:13,834 --> 00:15:15,792 Um, nothing. Nothing. 196 00:15:15,876 --> 00:15:17,876 I've never been so bored in my whole life. 197 00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:21,001 Yeah. First month I went out. I bought a whole bunch of shit. 198 00:15:21,084 --> 00:15:23,001 But, y... Nothing. 199 00:15:26,209 --> 00:15:28,792 Someone got a joint for me? 200 00:15:58,251 --> 00:16:00,167 Here you go. 201 00:16:02,251 --> 00:16:04,834 Oh. No, thanks, man. 202 00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:08,417 Really? I thought you were a big movie star and shit. 203 00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:10,876 - Nah. - Well, then here. 204 00:16:10,959 --> 00:16:13,667 Eat this. 205 00:16:13,792 --> 00:16:16,001 Welcome home. 206 00:16:27,251 --> 00:16:29,501 - I guess I'll see you guys later. 207 00:16:31,292 --> 00:16:33,626 Should we play a game? 208 00:16:33,709 --> 00:16:37,376 Let's play "spin the bottle." 209 00:16:37,501 --> 00:16:41,001 I'm not playing "spin the bottle." How old are we? 210 00:16:41,126 --> 00:16:43,959 - Or more importantly, how old are they? - Oh, they're all legal. 211 00:16:44,042 --> 00:16:45,959 I think. 212 00:16:46,042 --> 00:16:48,334 Well, we just ate all this fucking "X," 213 00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:51,126 so what the hell else are we supposed to do? 214 00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:53,626 Girl has a point. 215 00:16:53,709 --> 00:16:57,084 - Fucking right. - I'm in! 216 00:18:02,459 --> 00:18:04,376 - Hey! - Large! 217 00:18:07,251 --> 00:18:09,209 Large! 218 00:18:14,376 --> 00:18:17,876 - Largeman, this is Dana. - Hi. 219 00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:20,668 Hi. 220 00:18:20,793 --> 00:18:23,001 - Who's up? 221 00:18:50,668 --> 00:18:52,626 Whoo! 222 00:18:59,626 --> 00:19:03,168 - This is gonna be a good night. 223 00:20:18,668 --> 00:20:20,543 It's good, isn't it? 224 00:20:24,376 --> 00:20:27,543 I always try to save a couple of the marshmallows till the very end... 225 00:20:27,668 --> 00:20:29,626 but I never make it. 226 00:20:29,709 --> 00:20:31,626 I always end up with... 227 00:20:31,709 --> 00:20:34,043 a bunch of flake things and pink milk. 228 00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:37,668 My mind wanders. 229 00:20:40,793 --> 00:20:42,709 So, Tim... 230 00:20:42,793 --> 00:20:46,168 How long have you been working at Medieval Times? 231 00:20:46,251 --> 00:20:49,959 Three years. B-But I've only been a knight for two. 232 00:20:50,043 --> 00:20:52,043 You have to pay your dues. 233 00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:55,334 I worked in the stables and helped in the kitchen. 234 00:20:55,459 --> 00:20:57,626 When I started, he was making the coleslaw. 235 00:20:57,709 --> 00:21:00,001 It hasn't been the same since you got knighted. 236 00:21:00,084 --> 00:21:02,001 But I really just stirred it. 237 00:21:02,084 --> 00:21:04,084 Don't be modest. 238 00:21:04,209 --> 00:21:06,543 Mr. Modesty won the joust last night. 239 00:21:06,626 --> 00:21:10,959 - Congratulations. - It's not that big a deal. It's fixed. 240 00:21:11,043 --> 00:21:13,959 What was it that happened to you in high school? 241 00:21:14,043 --> 00:21:15,959 You had a thing. I forgot what it was. 242 00:21:16,043 --> 00:21:18,459 - He got the shit kicked out of him. - No, he didn't. 243 00:21:18,543 --> 00:21:22,168 How do you know? He got the shit kicked out of him by Tyrell Freedmen. 244 00:21:22,293 --> 00:21:25,043 - I fucked him up too. - He knocked your teeth out. 245 00:21:25,168 --> 00:21:27,501 He only chipped one tooth. 246 00:21:29,751 --> 00:21:32,209 So, uh, w-what are you up to now, Mark? 247 00:21:32,293 --> 00:21:34,209 You're digging graves? 248 00:21:38,793 --> 00:21:40,793 Mark's getting into real estate. 249 00:21:45,959 --> 00:21:48,543 - Tim can speak Klingon. - What? 250 00:21:48,668 --> 00:21:50,543 - No, I can't. - Yes, you can. 251 00:21:50,626 --> 00:21:52,834 - What the fuck is Klingon? - Like the Star Trek guys? 252 00:21:52,959 --> 00:21:55,543 - Yeah, he can speak their language. - No, she's kidding. 253 00:21:55,668 --> 00:21:57,876 No, I'm not. Why are you being shy? 254 00:21:58,001 --> 00:22:00,501 - Yeah, don't be shy, Tim. - It's just... It's made-up. 255 00:22:00,584 --> 00:22:03,543 This guy who plays the wizard at work is a Trekkie. I don't... 256 00:22:03,626 --> 00:22:06,793 - Don't be shy. Tell them what you said to me last night. - No. 257 00:22:06,876 --> 00:22:09,501 Say what you said to her last night. 258 00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:16,501 You gotta be kidding me. 259 00:22:16,584 --> 00:22:19,543 It means, "I like to mate after battle." 260 00:22:19,668 --> 00:22:21,668 - That's not what I said. - Yeah. 261 00:22:21,751 --> 00:22:23,709 No. No. That wasn't the one I said. 262 00:22:23,834 --> 00:22:25,751 This one means, "Kill Kirk"... 263 00:22:25,876 --> 00:22:29,501 and also "Hallelujah," depending on the context. 264 00:22:29,584 --> 00:22:31,876 You must have got it confused with, uh... 265 00:22:34,584 --> 00:22:38,168 - Honey, that is good. - You know what that means, Tim? 266 00:22:38,293 --> 00:22:41,209 Well, I do. It means, "Get the fuck out of my house... 267 00:22:41,293 --> 00:22:43,209 before I chop your fucking head off." 268 00:22:51,251 --> 00:22:53,626 Mark, he's a knight. 269 00:22:53,709 --> 00:22:56,459 He's just a fast-food knight. 270 00:22:58,876 --> 00:23:00,793 I should get going. 271 00:23:12,501 --> 00:23:14,376 Thanks, uh, for the cereal. 272 00:23:14,501 --> 00:23:17,501 I had a lovely evening. 273 00:23:17,626 --> 00:23:20,043 By the way, it says "balls" on your face. 274 00:23:22,209 --> 00:23:25,126 - Asshole. - My mom did it. 275 00:23:28,793 --> 00:23:31,001 In the spring... 276 00:23:31,084 --> 00:23:35,376 the hungry gator must find new and clever ways to find food. 277 00:23:40,168 --> 00:23:43,043 Did you tell Large about... the tapes? 278 00:23:43,126 --> 00:23:45,793 No, Mom. I'm not doing those stupid tapes. 279 00:23:45,876 --> 00:23:47,834 - What are the tapes? - Real estate tapes. 280 00:23:47,918 --> 00:23:51,668 You can make up to $100,000 your first year. 281 00:23:51,751 --> 00:23:54,251 You should have seen the boat this Oriental guy had. 282 00:23:54,376 --> 00:23:57,543 He even had his own game show in China, he had so much money. 283 00:23:57,668 --> 00:23:59,668 I think Mark would be perfect at it. 284 00:23:59,793 --> 00:24:02,959 Ma, shut up about those fuckin' tapes. Okay? It's a scam. 285 00:24:03,043 --> 00:24:06,751 Well, I'm doing it. I'm saving up for those tapes. 286 00:24:06,876 --> 00:24:08,126 Because I know what you could be if you just apply yourself. 287 00:24:08,126 --> 00:24:09,668 Because I know what you could be if you just apply yourself. 288 00:24:09,751 --> 00:24:12,751 You know what? I do apply myself every day, Mom. 289 00:24:12,876 --> 00:24:15,960 I work my ass off burying dead people. Okay? 290 00:24:16,043 --> 00:24:18,876 I'm only 26. I'm not in any rush. What's your rush for? 291 00:24:20,793 --> 00:24:23,501 Just let me be. I don't rush you. 292 00:24:26,085 --> 00:24:28,668 Okay. Then I'll do 'em myself. 293 00:24:28,751 --> 00:24:31,626 Fine. Do 'em. 294 00:24:31,710 --> 00:24:35,585 Okay, then I won't let you on my yacht. 295 00:24:35,710 --> 00:24:38,835 Except Large. Large, you can come anytime you want. 296 00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:42,460 Just don't bring your friend here. 297 00:24:44,501 --> 00:24:47,168 Shit! I got to go to my meeting. 298 00:24:48,460 --> 00:24:50,460 Okay. 299 00:24:52,751 --> 00:24:54,668 I love you. 300 00:24:55,876 --> 00:24:58,293 - I love you too. - I love you. 301 00:25:01,376 --> 00:25:04,543 - Large, it was nice to see you. - Nice to see you too. 302 00:25:04,668 --> 00:25:07,293 Oh. Oh, you guys, don't stay in here all day... 303 00:25:07,376 --> 00:25:10,251 'cause I took the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector. 304 00:25:10,376 --> 00:25:12,710 It was beeping all night. 305 00:25:15,668 --> 00:25:17,793 She drives me crazy! 306 00:25:17,876 --> 00:25:21,251 She gets all baked out and makes me feel like I have to impress her. 307 00:25:21,376 --> 00:25:23,251 And you know what? 308 00:25:23,376 --> 00:25:25,835 I'm okay with being unimpressive. I sleep better. 309 00:25:27,501 --> 00:25:31,293 - Hey, what time is it? - No idea. 310 00:25:31,376 --> 00:25:33,335 I gotta go. 311 00:25:37,876 --> 00:25:40,043 Hi, I'm Andrew Largeman. I'm sorry. 312 00:25:40,168 --> 00:25:43,293 - I'm really late for my appointment. - Andrew. Andrew. 313 00:25:43,376 --> 00:25:46,835 Okay, Andrew. I'm gonna need you to fill out this paperwork for me. 314 00:25:46,918 --> 00:25:49,085 As soon as we're ready, we'll call you in. 315 00:25:49,210 --> 00:25:51,543 - Okay. Thank you. I'm sorry. - It's okay. Have a seat. 316 00:25:51,668 --> 00:25:53,543 - Hello, Miss Lubin. - Oh, hello there. 317 00:25:53,668 --> 00:25:56,168 Just have a seat. We'll be with you soon, okay? 318 00:25:56,293 --> 00:25:58,501 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 319 00:26:22,251 --> 00:26:24,168 How's it going? 320 00:26:26,876 --> 00:26:28,960 - Get off. 321 00:26:29,043 --> 00:26:30,960 Get off. 322 00:26:39,543 --> 00:26:42,501 - Heel. 323 00:26:42,585 --> 00:26:45,876 - Heel! 324 00:26:49,376 --> 00:26:52,001 Got any suggestions? 325 00:26:52,126 --> 00:26:54,043 Oh, what? 326 00:26:54,168 --> 00:26:57,293 - You got any suggestions? - Yeah, kick his balls. 327 00:26:58,918 --> 00:27:00,876 Kick his balls. 328 00:27:02,793 --> 00:27:06,501 Yeah, but I don't wanna destroy future generations of charitable dogs. 329 00:27:06,626 --> 00:27:08,543 Don't worry about it. I got three Dobermans. 330 00:27:08,626 --> 00:27:12,043 If I didn't kick them in the balls regularly, I'd never get anything done. 331 00:27:12,168 --> 00:27:14,126 But he's gotta be close to finishing by now. 332 00:27:14,210 --> 00:27:16,126 Not yet. 333 00:27:16,210 --> 00:27:18,335 Here comes the lipstick. 334 00:27:18,460 --> 00:27:20,751 Mrs. Lubin? We're ready for you now. 335 00:27:20,876 --> 00:27:23,751 - Okay. Come on, Arthur. 336 00:27:29,918 --> 00:27:32,376 - I feel so used. 337 00:27:32,501 --> 00:27:36,251 Thanks for your help. For, at least, your good intentions. 338 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,793 - I recognize you. - Oh, did you go to Columbia High? 339 00:27:40,876 --> 00:27:43,210 No, not from high school. From TV. 340 00:27:43,293 --> 00:27:45,960 - Didn't you play the retarded quarterback? - Yeah. 341 00:27:46,043 --> 00:27:48,043 Are you really retarded? 342 00:27:49,460 --> 00:27:51,376 No, I'm not. 343 00:27:51,460 --> 00:27:53,585 Cool. 344 00:27:53,710 --> 00:27:57,335 Great job, man. I mean, I thought you were really retarded. 345 00:27:57,418 --> 00:28:00,585 You're just as good as that Corky kid, and he's actually retarded. 346 00:28:00,710 --> 00:28:02,835 If there was some sort of retarded Oscar... 347 00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:06,501 you would win like hands down, kick his ass. 348 00:28:06,626 --> 00:28:09,335 Well, thank you. Thanks, I appreciate it. 349 00:28:09,418 --> 00:28:11,876 I have to fill out this form though, so... 350 00:28:12,001 --> 00:28:13,876 - Right on. - Thanks. 351 00:28:18,585 --> 00:28:21,168 My cousin's an actor. Jake Ryan Winters. 352 00:28:21,251 --> 00:28:23,168 Doubt you've ever heard of him. 353 00:28:23,251 --> 00:28:27,668 He was, like, on Xena once as a gnome or something. That's really cool though. 354 00:28:27,751 --> 00:28:30,210 Thanks. 355 00:28:31,626 --> 00:28:33,543 Oh, my God. 356 00:28:33,626 --> 00:28:35,543 That scene. That last scene... 357 00:28:35,626 --> 00:28:37,876 where you give the speech to the whole stadium... 358 00:28:38,001 --> 00:28:40,793 and your dad... oh, your dad gives you the thumbs up. 359 00:28:40,876 --> 00:28:43,793 Aw. That was, like... 360 00:28:43,876 --> 00:28:45,793 That was emotional. 361 00:28:47,335 --> 00:28:49,293 So, you got anything else coming out? 362 00:28:49,376 --> 00:28:51,626 No. You know, I'm auditioning... 363 00:28:51,710 --> 00:28:53,668 I can't believe you're not really retarded. 364 00:28:53,751 --> 00:28:55,668 I mean, Jake's not a very good actor. 365 00:28:55,751 --> 00:28:58,835 You can't really tell on Xena 'cause he's in the hairy gnome suit... 366 00:28:58,918 --> 00:29:02,460 but when we were little, he used to put on these really, really low-budge... 367 00:29:02,543 --> 00:29:04,835 renditions of Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals in our attic. 368 00:29:04,918 --> 00:29:07,876 And they were awful! 369 00:29:08,001 --> 00:29:10,210 Like, so bad. 370 00:29:12,168 --> 00:29:15,710 It sucks, though, because there's not that much work for little people, you know? 371 00:29:15,835 --> 00:29:18,293 - Anyway, I'm talking too much. 372 00:29:18,376 --> 00:29:21,126 I'll just... You got to fill out your forms. 373 00:29:21,210 --> 00:29:23,335 What are you listening to? 374 00:29:23,418 --> 00:29:25,376 The Shins. 375 00:29:25,501 --> 00:29:27,876 - You know them? - No. 376 00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:31,293 You gotta hear this one song. It'll change your life. I swear. 377 00:29:31,376 --> 00:29:34,960 Oh, I'm sorry. You have to... You gotta fill out your forms. 378 00:29:35,043 --> 00:29:36,960 Conundrum. Think you could, uh... 379 00:29:37,043 --> 00:29:40,376 - maybe listen while you fill out your forms? - I think I can handle it. 380 00:29:40,501 --> 00:29:42,460 Yeah? Okay. 381 00:29:55,126 --> 00:29:58,418 # Gold teeth and a curse for this town 382 00:29:59,751 --> 00:30:01,835 # Were all in my mouth 383 00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,501 # Only, I don't know how 384 00:30:04,585 --> 00:30:06,710 #They got out, dear # 385 00:30:06,835 --> 00:30:08,710 #Turn me... ## 386 00:30:08,835 --> 00:30:10,710 It's good. I like it. 387 00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:16,001 - So, what are you here for? - What are you here for? 388 00:30:16,085 --> 00:30:18,210 Waiting for a friend. You? 389 00:30:19,585 --> 00:30:21,501 I, uh... 390 00:30:21,585 --> 00:30:24,001 Oh, fuck, that was nosy. I'm sorry. 391 00:30:24,085 --> 00:30:27,710 I am so nosy. I didn't... I didn't mean to be. I'm sorry. 392 00:30:27,835 --> 00:30:31,001 No, I just... I get these headaches. I just want to have it checked out. 393 00:30:31,126 --> 00:30:33,126 Cool. 394 00:30:33,210 --> 00:30:35,126 - Andrew Largeman? - Yes. 395 00:30:35,210 --> 00:30:38,543 - We're ready for you now. - Oh, okay. 396 00:30:38,668 --> 00:30:41,543 - Thank you. Nice meeting you. - You didn't. I'm Sam. 397 00:30:41,668 --> 00:30:43,293 Andrew. 398 00:30:43,376 --> 00:30:46,835 Nice to meet you. Good luck with your head. 399 00:30:46,918 --> 00:30:48,876 Thanks. 400 00:30:50,335 --> 00:30:52,626 Don't worry, Sam. We'll be with you next. 401 00:31:22,085 --> 00:31:25,127 - Mr. Andrew Largeman? - Yes, hi. 402 00:31:25,210 --> 00:31:27,335 - There's absolutely nothing wrong with you. - What? 403 00:31:27,418 --> 00:31:30,460 Just kidding. How would I know that? Uh... 404 00:31:31,543 --> 00:31:33,960 I'm Dr. Cohen. 405 00:31:36,127 --> 00:31:38,210 What can we do for you today, Andrew. 406 00:31:39,585 --> 00:31:41,960 Um, I've been getting these really intense headaches. 407 00:31:42,043 --> 00:31:45,293 Um, they last for like a split second. 408 00:31:45,377 --> 00:31:49,210 It's like lightning, like a surge of electricity, and then it's gone. 409 00:31:53,043 --> 00:31:54,960 Lithium? 410 00:31:55,043 --> 00:31:57,127 How long have you been on the lithium? 411 00:31:57,210 --> 00:32:01,710 Um, I've been on some form of it since I was 10 or so. 412 00:32:04,043 --> 00:32:06,835 And the Paxil, Zoloft, Celexa... 413 00:32:06,918 --> 00:32:08,877 Depakote... 414 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:11,460 did they, uh, help you at all? 415 00:32:11,543 --> 00:32:13,460 No. 416 00:32:14,585 --> 00:32:16,585 I mean, I don't know. Uh... 417 00:32:16,710 --> 00:32:20,002 It's recently occurred to me I might not even have a problem. 418 00:32:20,127 --> 00:32:24,543 Only, I'd never know it because as far back as I can remember, I've been medicated. 419 00:32:24,627 --> 00:32:26,835 I left them in L.A. though. 420 00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:31,168 This is, uh, the first time I haven't had medicine in my body for... a long time. 421 00:32:31,293 --> 00:32:33,835 You know that stuff will leave your body pretty fast. 422 00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:38,377 - I can write you a prescription. - Actually, I was thinking about taking a little vacation. 423 00:32:38,502 --> 00:32:40,793 Have you discussed this with your psychiatrist? 424 00:32:40,877 --> 00:32:44,210 Uh, well, my psychiatrist is my dad. 425 00:32:45,877 --> 00:32:48,918 Yeah. So I think he'd prefer me to stay on it. 426 00:32:49,043 --> 00:32:52,210 He... likes to think it makes me happy. 427 00:32:54,168 --> 00:32:57,377 You know, our bodies are capable of doing some very funny things... 428 00:32:57,502 --> 00:32:59,877 when they're consumed with stress and anxiety. 429 00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:02,668 Uh... 430 00:33:02,793 --> 00:33:07,627 I found my ex-best friend's cuff links in my wife's purse. 431 00:33:10,252 --> 00:33:12,877 I couldn't get an erection for a year and a half... 432 00:33:13,002 --> 00:33:14,877 for example. 433 00:33:16,710 --> 00:33:20,002 Wow. Um... 434 00:33:20,085 --> 00:33:22,918 But I don't really think that's it because I don't... 435 00:33:23,043 --> 00:33:26,377 I don't really feel like stressed or anxious at all. 436 00:33:26,502 --> 00:33:30,210 'Cause all the lithium he's had you on. It's amazing you can even hear me now. 437 00:33:32,460 --> 00:33:34,668 Look, Andrew, uh, first of all... 438 00:33:34,793 --> 00:33:38,252 I think you do need to find a psychiatrist that isn't your father. 439 00:33:38,377 --> 00:33:41,168 That's something that should have been remedied years ago. 440 00:33:41,252 --> 00:33:43,168 He knows better. 441 00:33:43,252 --> 00:33:46,252 And secondly, uh, I'm in no position to comment on... 442 00:33:46,377 --> 00:33:49,960 whether you should stay on the meds or not because I don't know your story. 443 00:33:50,043 --> 00:33:54,002 But my opinion, since you're paying for it... 444 00:33:54,127 --> 00:33:57,710 is that, yeah, those drugs may help you as a means to an end... 445 00:33:57,835 --> 00:34:00,502 but sooner or later, if you're not in some sort of therapy... 446 00:34:00,627 --> 00:34:04,835 whatever's going on in your mind will find a way to peek its little head out of the water. 447 00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,127 - Are you all right? - Yeah. 448 00:34:07,210 --> 00:34:09,293 Yeah, you're all right. You're alive. 449 00:34:09,377 --> 00:34:12,210 Come on. I'll take a look at you. Come. 450 00:34:14,668 --> 00:34:18,127 I'll need you to take your shoes off. I have to scratch your feet. 451 00:34:51,085 --> 00:34:53,377 So why were you really there? 452 00:34:53,502 --> 00:34:55,502 Charging. I'm a robot. 453 00:34:57,043 --> 00:35:00,627 - Do you lie a lot? - What do you consider a lot? 454 00:35:00,710 --> 00:35:02,710 Enough for people to call you a liar. 455 00:35:02,793 --> 00:35:06,335 - People call me lots of things. - Is one of them "liar"? 456 00:35:06,418 --> 00:35:09,293 I could say no, but how would you know I'm not lyin'? 457 00:35:09,377 --> 00:35:11,877 I guess I could choose to trust you. 458 00:35:12,002 --> 00:35:14,460 - You can do that? - I can try. 459 00:35:14,543 --> 00:35:16,835 Whose bike is that? 460 00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,168 It was my grandfather's. 461 00:35:21,293 --> 00:35:25,793 It was the only thing he left to anyone in my family, and he left it to me. 462 00:35:25,877 --> 00:35:27,877 And I like it. 463 00:35:30,418 --> 00:35:34,793 So this is the point in the conversation where you ask me if I'd like a ride home. 464 00:35:34,877 --> 00:35:37,043 - It is? - Yep. 465 00:35:39,335 --> 00:35:41,210 Would you like a ride home? 466 00:35:43,752 --> 00:35:47,335 Fine. But I'm not getting in that sidecar. 467 00:35:47,460 --> 00:35:50,168 - Why not? - Sidecars are for bitches. 468 00:35:50,252 --> 00:35:53,002 Anyone who rides in that is automatically your bitch. 469 00:35:53,085 --> 00:35:55,668 Thus, I will ride on the back. 470 00:36:03,918 --> 00:36:05,835 - Whoa. - Hold on tight. 471 00:36:05,918 --> 00:36:08,002 Okay. Holdin'. 472 00:36:11,585 --> 00:36:13,752 My hair is blowin' in the wind. 473 00:36:18,585 --> 00:36:20,502 What, are you like a hang glider? 474 00:36:20,585 --> 00:36:23,043 My boyfriend was gonna pick me up so I brought it. 475 00:36:23,168 --> 00:36:26,627 - But then he couldn't. - What does he have? One of those tandem things? 476 00:36:26,710 --> 00:36:29,460 No. He drives a Ninja. Goes way faster than this guy. 477 00:36:29,543 --> 00:36:33,002 - But what kind of helmet is that? - You can wear it on a bike. 478 00:36:33,127 --> 00:36:35,668 - Anyway, how's your head? - I should live through the day. 479 00:36:35,752 --> 00:36:37,668 Cool. Make a right here. 480 00:36:42,418 --> 00:36:45,210 Are you doing anything right now? 481 00:36:45,335 --> 00:36:48,418 - Can you elaborate on "doing anything"? - I know this guy, Jesse. 482 00:36:48,543 --> 00:36:50,543 He bought this mansion that's right up here... 483 00:36:50,668 --> 00:36:52,543 and he wants me to come visit him. 484 00:36:52,668 --> 00:36:56,835 But I don't want to stay very long. I was thinking, like if you came too... 485 00:36:56,960 --> 00:37:00,377 I could just say I have to take you home when I'm ready to go. 486 00:37:00,460 --> 00:37:03,627 Wow. That's pretty damn random of you, Andrew. 487 00:37:03,710 --> 00:37:06,210 - I know. - "Nice to meet you. Can I use you?" 488 00:37:06,293 --> 00:37:08,293 - No. - It's the Hollywood in you, I guess. 489 00:37:08,377 --> 00:37:10,835 No. Come on. It's not like that. It'll be fun. 490 00:37:10,918 --> 00:37:14,168 I'll tell you what, we can have like... like a signal. 491 00:37:14,252 --> 00:37:17,293 Like, when you pull on your ear, that's the code. 492 00:37:17,377 --> 00:37:21,377 And then I'll be like, "Oh, I got to take her home." And then we'll go. 493 00:37:23,043 --> 00:37:25,127 Can we have code names too? 494 00:37:25,210 --> 00:37:27,668 If you want. 495 00:37:27,752 --> 00:37:30,668 Okay. But don't try and like kidnap me or anything... 496 00:37:30,752 --> 00:37:34,668 'cause my step-uncle's a bounty hunter and he could have you tracked and killed. 497 00:37:34,752 --> 00:37:36,877 You're such a liar. 498 00:37:39,377 --> 00:37:41,252 Whoo! 499 00:37:42,793 --> 00:37:45,002 Okay. You ready? 500 00:38:06,210 --> 00:38:09,127 I'll be fine. Am I the first boy you've ever brought home? 501 00:38:09,210 --> 00:38:11,169 No. But, um... 502 00:38:11,252 --> 00:38:14,377 I lied to you before when I told you my boyfriend drives a Ninja. 503 00:38:14,502 --> 00:38:17,502 - He doesn't drive a bike? - No, I don't have a boyfriend. 504 00:38:18,627 --> 00:38:21,377 But, you know, he might drive a Ninja. 505 00:38:21,502 --> 00:38:24,669 - Wherever he is. - Wow. We're off to a great start. 506 00:38:24,752 --> 00:38:28,919 Okay. So... So sometimes I lie. 507 00:38:29,044 --> 00:38:31,710 I mean, I'm weird, man. 508 00:38:31,835 --> 00:38:34,835 About random stuff too. I don't even know why I do it. 509 00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:36,877 It's like... It's like a tic. 510 00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:41,377 I mean, sometimes I hear myself say something, and then I think... 511 00:38:41,502 --> 00:38:43,960 "Wow, that wasn't even remotely true." 512 00:38:44,044 --> 00:38:46,627 So how do people know what's real? 513 00:38:46,710 --> 00:38:50,752 Well, I always feel bad afterwards and admit them when they're lies. 514 00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:53,877 Can you trust that? 515 00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:57,002 Open the door. 516 00:38:58,710 --> 00:38:59,960 Okay. 517 00:38:59,960 --> 00:39:00,877 Okay. 518 00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,460 Kevin, down. Mom! 519 00:39:07,544 --> 00:39:10,377 Come on. Kick him in the balls. Kick him in the balls. 520 00:39:10,502 --> 00:39:12,669 Mom! 521 00:39:12,794 --> 00:39:15,710 All right! Everybody down! Who wants to eat? 522 00:39:15,794 --> 00:39:19,002 Do you want to eat? Then get the fuck off him. 523 00:39:19,127 --> 00:39:21,794 Kevin! Get off! 524 00:39:21,877 --> 00:39:25,169 I'm so sorry. We just don't have the time to train them. 525 00:39:25,294 --> 00:39:27,502 Who's got the time to train them? 526 00:39:27,585 --> 00:39:30,294 - Mom, this is Andrew. - Welcome. 527 00:39:30,377 --> 00:39:32,294 Welcome. I'm sorry the place is a wreck. 528 00:39:32,377 --> 00:39:35,752 Honey, I asked you to get the metal wheel out of the hamster cage. 529 00:39:35,877 --> 00:39:38,752 - I forgot. - Well, you forgot and now Jelly's dead. 530 00:39:38,877 --> 00:39:41,002 Luckily, I got Peanut Butter out in time. 531 00:39:41,085 --> 00:39:43,544 We have to get the only hamsters on planet Earth... 532 00:39:43,627 --> 00:39:45,794 who can't figure out a stupid hamster wheel. 533 00:39:45,877 --> 00:39:48,002 There's a tin box on the kitchen counter. 534 00:39:48,127 --> 00:39:50,669 You can do the honors. I have to get to work. 535 00:39:50,794 --> 00:39:52,794 - It's nice to meet you. Andrew, right? - Yes. 536 00:39:52,877 --> 00:39:55,169 Andrew. Very nice to meet you. 537 00:39:55,294 --> 00:39:57,835 Samatha, put the clothes in the dryer and buryJelly. 538 00:40:01,377 --> 00:40:03,669 So this is it. 539 00:40:12,419 --> 00:40:14,627 - It's nice. - No, it's not. 540 00:40:14,710 --> 00:40:17,460 Don't say that just 'cause you can't think of anything else. 541 00:40:17,544 --> 00:40:19,877 I'm not. I'm not. It's... It's very cozy. 542 00:40:20,002 --> 00:40:22,460 You guys are a little early on the tree though. 543 00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:26,502 Yeah, we never got around to taking it down. When it got to be fall again... 544 00:40:26,627 --> 00:40:28,544 we figured, "Just leave it up." 545 00:40:28,627 --> 00:40:31,877 Oh, my God. You're totally freaked out. You're totally freaked out right now. 546 00:40:32,002 --> 00:40:35,169 - You, like, can't wait to leave. - I'm not. I'm not. I like it. 547 00:40:35,252 --> 00:40:37,877 - It's very nice. - Well, you wanna see my room? 548 00:40:38,002 --> 00:40:39,877 Sure. 549 00:40:40,919 --> 00:40:42,835 - Hey. - Hey. 550 00:40:42,919 --> 00:40:46,002 Titembay, this is my friend Andrew. Andrew, this is my brother, Titembay. 551 00:40:46,085 --> 00:40:49,627 - Hi. It's very nice to meet you. - Oh, it's nice to meet you. 552 00:40:49,710 --> 00:40:51,835 - I'm sorry aboutJelly. - Oh, that's okay. 553 00:40:51,919 --> 00:40:54,544 I saved some mac and cheese for you. It's in the fridge. 554 00:40:54,669 --> 00:40:56,669 Thank you. 555 00:41:00,627 --> 00:41:04,044 Anyway, I'm late for class. It's nice meeting you. 556 00:41:04,169 --> 00:41:06,960 - Very nice to meet you. - See you later. 557 00:41:10,419 --> 00:41:12,335 So here we are. 558 00:41:12,419 --> 00:41:15,544 It's nothing fancy, but you know... What? 559 00:41:17,335 --> 00:41:19,877 Uh, it's... Titembay, right? 560 00:41:20,002 --> 00:41:22,752 Yeah, it's weird, huh? You're, like, so freaked out right now. 561 00:41:22,877 --> 00:41:26,169 You're running for the door. It's okay. You can go. Don't feel bad. It's really... 562 00:41:26,252 --> 00:41:28,210 - Stop doing that. - What? 563 00:41:28,335 --> 00:41:31,669 The whole thing you just did. I wanna be here. If I didn't, I wouldn't be. 564 00:41:31,752 --> 00:41:34,502 Trust me, my family is way more fucked up than yours. Okay? 565 00:41:34,585 --> 00:41:36,210 Okay. 566 00:41:36,335 --> 00:41:39,210 So, Titembay. 567 00:41:39,294 --> 00:41:43,002 - Yeah, he's my brother. - Is he adopted or... 568 00:41:43,127 --> 00:41:46,127 Kind of. My mom adopted him from Sally Struthers like years ago. 569 00:41:46,210 --> 00:41:49,877 One of those "For the cost of a cup of coffee a day" sort of things. 570 00:41:50,002 --> 00:41:53,502 Where she's like, "How can you just sit there and not help the children?" 571 00:41:53,627 --> 00:41:57,002 And we couldn't. We just couldn't sit there and not help the children. 572 00:41:57,085 --> 00:42:00,419 So we start sending him like pictures and letters and stuff for years... 573 00:42:00,544 --> 00:42:04,294 but then I got really into ice-skating, so we sort of forgot about him. 574 00:42:04,377 --> 00:42:07,419 Then one day we get this phone call and it's Titembay. 575 00:42:07,544 --> 00:42:09,710 And he's at the dry cleaners around the corner. 576 00:42:09,835 --> 00:42:12,544 And he's like, "I'm at Rutgers. I live in the dorms... 577 00:42:12,669 --> 00:42:16,127 but I'm used to living with my tribe so I'd rather live with a family." 578 00:42:16,210 --> 00:42:18,669 And he's been living with us ever since. 579 00:42:18,752 --> 00:42:21,210 Wow. 580 00:42:21,294 --> 00:42:24,210 Yeah. I know. He's the most amazing guy. 581 00:42:24,335 --> 00:42:28,169 You gotta hear his stories. He struggled through so much because he wanted to learn. 582 00:42:28,252 --> 00:42:30,377 When I think of what he's accomplished, I just... 583 00:42:30,502 --> 00:42:32,419 I just feel, like, lazy. You know? 584 00:42:32,544 --> 00:42:35,377 He's studying criminal justice at Rutgers, and when he was a baby... 585 00:42:35,460 --> 00:42:38,710 he was one of those kids with, like, the flies all over his face. 586 00:42:40,044 --> 00:42:42,335 Wow. 587 00:42:42,460 --> 00:42:44,377 I mean, i-it's a crazy story. 588 00:42:44,460 --> 00:42:48,377 Yeah, I know. I mean, that's a true story. I am not that good. 589 00:42:49,502 --> 00:42:52,002 This is Tickle. 590 00:42:52,127 --> 00:42:56,419 - What is Tickle? - Tickle's my favorite thing in the whole world. 591 00:42:56,544 --> 00:42:59,502 It's all that's left of Nanny, my blanket. 592 00:42:59,585 --> 00:43:01,794 - Tickle's all that remains. - Mm-hmm. 593 00:43:01,877 --> 00:43:04,335 - Was there like a hurricane or something? - Shut up. 594 00:43:04,419 --> 00:43:07,794 No, I mean, I've had this since I was a baby. 595 00:43:07,877 --> 00:43:10,627 It's what they brought me home in from the hospital. 596 00:43:11,919 --> 00:43:14,919 - It's like the Wailing Wall. - What? 597 00:43:15,044 --> 00:43:17,335 Uh, the Wailing Wall is like this, uh... 598 00:43:17,460 --> 00:43:21,002 It's like the most holy place forJews to go and pray in Israel. 599 00:43:21,127 --> 00:43:25,794 It's all that's left of this enormous temple that was destroyed by the Romans. 600 00:43:25,877 --> 00:43:28,669 So you're like reallyJewish. 601 00:43:28,794 --> 00:43:30,710 - What? - You are, aren't you? 602 00:43:30,794 --> 00:43:32,877 - You are. - No, I'm not. 603 00:43:33,002 --> 00:43:34,877 l-I'm Jewish, but I'm not reallyJewish. 604 00:43:35,002 --> 00:43:37,752 I don't do anything Jewish. I don't go to temple or anything. 605 00:43:37,877 --> 00:43:40,085 But I don't know anyJews that go to temple. 606 00:43:40,210 --> 00:43:42,335 TheJews I know, they go on one day. 607 00:43:42,419 --> 00:43:45,419 - It's Yom Kippur, the Day of Repentance. - Okay. 608 00:43:45,544 --> 00:43:48,335 Did you know that most temples are built with moveable walls... 609 00:43:48,419 --> 00:43:51,794 so that on the one day of the year when everyone comes to repent... 610 00:43:51,877 --> 00:43:54,627 they can actually make the room big enough to hold everyone? 611 00:43:54,710 --> 00:43:57,335 I don't really believe in God. 612 00:43:57,419 --> 00:44:00,169 - Just Tickle. - Oh, I believe in Tickle. 613 00:44:02,294 --> 00:44:04,835 - We're not gonna make out or anything. - What? 614 00:44:04,919 --> 00:44:07,710 I'm sorry. I just totally ruined that moment, didn't I? 615 00:44:07,835 --> 00:44:10,460 - No, no. - It's just that we're not gonna make out, okay? 616 00:44:10,544 --> 00:44:12,669 - Oh, no, I hadn't planned on trying... - Oh, my... 617 00:44:12,794 --> 00:44:15,335 I am so lame. That was like really... I am... 618 00:44:15,419 --> 00:44:17,585 I'm sorry. Forget I just said that. I am... 619 00:44:17,710 --> 00:44:19,627 That was dumb. And... 620 00:44:19,710 --> 00:44:22,877 - You know what I do when I feel completely unoriginal? - What? 621 00:44:24,169 --> 00:44:27,544 # La, blah, blah Blah, la, la ## 622 00:44:27,669 --> 00:44:31,210 I make a noise or I do something that no one has ever done before. 623 00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:35,127 And then I can feel unique again even if it's only for like a second. 624 00:44:35,210 --> 00:44:37,835 So, no one's ever done that? 625 00:44:37,960 --> 00:44:42,044 No, not in this spot. No. You just witnessed a completely original moment in history. 626 00:44:42,169 --> 00:44:44,627 - It's refreshing. You should try it. - Oh, no. Thanks. 627 00:44:44,710 --> 00:44:47,460 - No, come on. - I think that was good enough for both of us. 628 00:44:47,544 --> 00:44:49,710 Come on. What are you, shy? 629 00:44:49,835 --> 00:44:52,127 This is your one opportunity to do something... 630 00:44:52,210 --> 00:44:56,669 that no one has done before and that no one will copy again throughout human existence. 631 00:44:56,752 --> 00:45:01,169 A-And if nothing else, you'll be remembered as the one guy who ever did this. 632 00:45:01,252 --> 00:45:03,169 This one thing. 633 00:45:05,335 --> 00:45:07,794 Uh... 634 00:45:12,544 --> 00:45:14,461 How was that? 635 00:45:14,544 --> 00:45:16,794 Oh, I've done that one before. 636 00:45:16,877 --> 00:45:18,294 - So, uh... 637 00:45:18,294 --> 00:45:19,252 - So, uh... 638 00:45:19,377 --> 00:45:22,336 I gotta go bury this hamster before the dogs eat him. 639 00:45:22,419 --> 00:45:25,127 Wanna help? Hmm? 640 00:45:36,419 --> 00:45:39,711 - Wow. - Yeah. 641 00:45:39,836 --> 00:45:42,002 - I mean, this is, uh... - I know. 642 00:45:42,086 --> 00:45:45,169 It's not that we're bad pet owners or anything. 643 00:45:45,252 --> 00:45:49,169 It's just, you know, we've had so many of them over the years. 644 00:45:49,252 --> 00:45:51,502 Besides, a lot of these are fish. 645 00:45:51,627 --> 00:45:53,711 After you. 646 00:46:01,877 --> 00:46:04,502 All right. 647 00:46:07,294 --> 00:46:09,211 Sit down. 648 00:46:16,377 --> 00:46:18,377 What are you thinking about? 649 00:46:20,002 --> 00:46:22,169 - Now? - Yeah. 650 00:46:22,294 --> 00:46:25,336 - Right now? - Yeah. 651 00:46:25,419 --> 00:46:29,252 Right now, I was thinking I've been going to a lot of these things lately. 652 00:46:29,377 --> 00:46:31,794 - What, dates? - Not dates. 653 00:46:31,877 --> 00:46:34,919 Is this a date? This isn't a date. 654 00:46:35,044 --> 00:46:37,002 Funerals. 655 00:46:37,086 --> 00:46:39,044 Why? Who else died? 656 00:46:40,836 --> 00:46:43,044 Oh, uh... 657 00:46:43,169 --> 00:46:47,044 That's why I'm home actually. I guess I haven't even told you that yet. Um... 658 00:46:51,294 --> 00:46:53,377 My mom just died. 659 00:46:58,461 --> 00:47:01,586 God, that's weird to say that out loud, but, uh... 660 00:47:02,752 --> 00:47:05,586 My mom just died. And, uh... 661 00:47:05,711 --> 00:47:08,211 Yeah, that's why I'm home. 662 00:47:08,336 --> 00:47:10,669 I'm so sorry. 663 00:47:10,794 --> 00:47:12,836 God, I'm so sorry. 664 00:47:12,919 --> 00:47:15,794 And here I am, like, putting you through another one of these. 665 00:47:15,877 --> 00:47:17,836 Not thatJelly's like anywhere near your mom's. 666 00:47:17,919 --> 00:47:20,669 I mean, we loved Jelly but... 667 00:47:20,794 --> 00:47:22,711 I'm so sorry. 668 00:47:22,794 --> 00:47:25,502 No, it's okay. It's all right. 669 00:47:25,627 --> 00:47:27,544 I'm all right with it. 670 00:47:27,669 --> 00:47:30,336 Anyway, I think it's what she wanted, so... 671 00:47:30,419 --> 00:47:32,836 How'd she die? 672 00:47:34,419 --> 00:47:36,377 She drowned actually. 673 00:47:39,336 --> 00:47:41,794 Yeah, my, uh... My mother was a paraplegic. 674 00:47:41,877 --> 00:47:44,419 She was in a wheelchair so she, uh... 675 00:47:44,544 --> 00:47:46,669 You know, and, uh... 676 00:47:46,752 --> 00:47:48,836 I guess she was taking a bath... 677 00:47:48,961 --> 00:47:50,961 and she must have slipped or something. 678 00:47:51,044 --> 00:47:54,002 That's what they say. I don't... I don't know. But... 679 00:47:54,086 --> 00:47:56,127 needless to say, she drowned and... 680 00:47:56,211 --> 00:47:59,211 that's how she... sh-she died. 681 00:47:59,336 --> 00:48:01,711 When? 682 00:48:01,836 --> 00:48:04,211 This was, uh... 683 00:48:05,252 --> 00:48:07,211 Sunday. 684 00:48:07,294 --> 00:48:09,586 Oh, my God. 685 00:48:15,169 --> 00:48:17,044 Why are you crying? 686 00:48:19,086 --> 00:48:21,044 I don't know. I'm sorry. 687 00:48:22,377 --> 00:48:24,627 Because... I'm not usually like this. 688 00:48:24,711 --> 00:48:29,211 It's just like... It's just so sad. 689 00:48:29,336 --> 00:48:31,877 You know, it's like... 690 00:48:32,002 --> 00:48:34,877 It's so tragic, isn't it? It is. It's like... 691 00:48:34,961 --> 00:48:38,794 It's like real life tragedy or something. 692 00:48:38,877 --> 00:48:41,836 Anyway, let's change the subject, okay? 693 00:48:41,919 --> 00:48:44,002 Let's really bring the focus back toJelly... 694 00:48:44,127 --> 00:48:47,211 'cause what could be ruder than talking about someone else who died... 695 00:48:47,336 --> 00:48:50,002 when you're in the act of burying a close friend? 696 00:48:50,086 --> 00:48:54,294 - Well, what should we do? - I don't know. I've only been to one of these things. 697 00:48:54,377 --> 00:48:56,502 You appear to be the expert. 698 00:48:56,627 --> 00:48:59,461 Well, we usually say something. 699 00:48:59,544 --> 00:49:02,336 Okay, uh, I'll go first. Um... 700 00:49:04,044 --> 00:49:07,419 Didn't really know you, Jelly. From what I hear, you were a good pet. 701 00:49:07,544 --> 00:49:09,961 - Little trouble with the wheel but... - That's not funny. 702 00:49:15,877 --> 00:49:17,836 Jelly, you were a great pet. 703 00:49:20,127 --> 00:49:23,169 I'm sorry I forgot to take the wheel out of your cage. 704 00:49:23,294 --> 00:49:26,044 I'm so, so sorry about that. 705 00:49:27,086 --> 00:49:29,627 Good-bye. 706 00:49:29,711 --> 00:49:31,877 I hope that you liked me. 707 00:50:15,211 --> 00:50:17,336 Holy shit! You scared the shit out of me. 708 00:50:17,461 --> 00:50:20,544 - Why are you always doing that? - I haven't seen you in a while. 709 00:50:20,669 --> 00:50:23,044 I know. I've been catching up with people around here. 710 00:50:23,169 --> 00:50:26,627 Dr. Cohen called. There's nothing wrong with you. 711 00:50:26,711 --> 00:50:29,877 Yeah, I think I'm starting to figure that out myself. 712 00:50:30,002 --> 00:50:33,711 - When are you thinking of leaving? - Uh, probably tomorrow. 713 00:50:33,836 --> 00:50:38,002 Um, you know, I got a lot of stuff I got to take care of in L.A. 714 00:50:38,086 --> 00:50:41,544 - Probably have to find a newjob, so... - We need to talk. 715 00:50:42,836 --> 00:50:45,627 Yeah, uh, how? I mean, when? 716 00:50:46,711 --> 00:50:49,336 What are you doing... now? 717 00:50:51,086 --> 00:50:54,961 Uh, now's not so good. I told my friend Mark I was gonna meet up with him. 718 00:50:55,044 --> 00:50:57,044 But how about, uh, like later tonight? 719 00:50:57,127 --> 00:51:00,377 - Okay. Then we'll talk. - Yeah. 720 00:51:00,502 --> 00:51:02,544 We owe that to each other. 721 00:51:03,669 --> 00:51:05,544 Yeah. 722 00:51:05,669 --> 00:51:07,669 We owe it to her. 723 00:51:09,127 --> 00:51:11,544 Yeah. 724 00:51:11,669 --> 00:51:13,544 Good. 725 00:51:13,669 --> 00:51:15,586 Sorry I scared you. 726 00:51:18,419 --> 00:51:20,669 How could you leave all that lithium? 727 00:51:20,794 --> 00:51:23,419 I was totally going to hit you up for some, man. 728 00:51:23,544 --> 00:51:26,836 This fucking guy. I'm glad you're back, man. 729 00:51:26,961 --> 00:51:30,711 This town is so messed up. Everyone's got their drug of choice. 730 00:51:30,836 --> 00:51:33,961 It's like in Brave New World. You ever read that book? 731 00:51:34,044 --> 00:51:38,336 Who wrote that? Um, Aldous... Aldous something. 732 00:51:38,461 --> 00:51:41,502 Aldous, uh... Anyway... 733 00:51:41,586 --> 00:51:46,044 there's like Alphas and Betas and Epsilons and all sorts of people. 734 00:51:59,544 --> 00:52:01,961 Huxtable. 735 00:52:02,044 --> 00:52:06,336 Aldous Huxtable. That's it, bro. 736 00:52:21,794 --> 00:52:25,461 Andrew, would you like to see Sam's ice-skating tape? 737 00:52:25,586 --> 00:52:27,378 - Mom, no. - Absolutely. 738 00:52:27,461 --> 00:52:30,878 She was so ahead of her time. She could have gone to the Olympics. 739 00:52:30,961 --> 00:52:32,961 No, no, no, no. I couldn't have. 740 00:52:33,086 --> 00:52:35,294 Yes, you could have. Don't blame it on the epilepsy. 741 00:52:35,419 --> 00:52:39,044 - You had a gift. - Come on. Let me see it. 742 00:52:39,128 --> 00:52:42,919 Let's just show him the "Florida Stars of the Ice"opening. The gator costume. 743 00:52:43,003 --> 00:52:47,128 - Mom, I'm asking you, seriously. - Come on. Don't be shy. Let me see it! 744 00:52:47,253 --> 00:52:51,461 Oh, she wants you to see it. How could you not want him to see how talented you are? 745 00:52:51,586 --> 00:52:54,919 - Were. - Come on. 746 00:52:55,003 --> 00:52:57,503 - Come on. - Ohh! 747 00:52:59,628 --> 00:53:02,253 - Honey, what are you doing? - I'm dusting for prints. 748 00:53:02,336 --> 00:53:04,544 Well, could we move the crime scene into the kitchen? 749 00:53:04,628 --> 00:53:06,544 I want to show Andrew Sam's skating. 750 00:53:06,628 --> 00:53:10,086 But someone's been pissing on my GameCube, and I'm about to close the case. 751 00:53:10,169 --> 00:53:12,253 It wasn't me, Your Honor. 752 00:53:12,336 --> 00:53:14,794 The paw prints point to a canine. Hmm. 753 00:53:14,919 --> 00:53:17,086 Andrew, come on. Sit down here on the couch. 754 00:53:17,169 --> 00:53:20,086 I can't believe you're actually showing him this. 755 00:53:23,378 --> 00:53:25,586 Look, there she is. 756 00:53:38,753 --> 00:53:42,836 - You're the alligator? - You can tell by the hands. 757 00:54:06,294 --> 00:54:09,794 - Here comes the double axel. - And... 758 00:54:09,919 --> 00:54:14,253 - Land! Oh, I mean, come on. Is she good? - Wow, she's great. 759 00:54:17,878 --> 00:54:20,919 - All right. - Wow. 760 00:54:21,003 --> 00:54:24,294 - Shut up. - No, I mean, your mom was right. You're really good. 761 00:54:26,169 --> 00:54:28,794 - This is awesome, but we gotta go. - All right. 762 00:54:28,919 --> 00:54:31,128 - Just wanted to show how talented you are. - Mom, come on! 763 00:54:31,253 --> 00:54:33,003 My baby! All right, go on! 764 00:54:33,128 --> 00:54:36,003 Go on. Get away. Wait a minute. 765 00:54:36,128 --> 00:54:38,253 Gimme a hug. 766 00:54:38,378 --> 00:54:40,794 I love you so much. I'm so proud of you. 767 00:54:40,878 --> 00:54:42,919 - I love you too. - Have a good night. 768 00:54:43,003 --> 00:54:45,461 - Thanks for dinner. - Come on! You're giving me a hug too. 769 00:54:45,544 --> 00:54:48,294 - Mom! Come on. - I'll take a hug. 770 00:54:56,919 --> 00:54:59,919 - Good night. See you later, Tim. - Bye, Tim. 771 00:55:00,044 --> 00:55:03,044 - Peace out, player. 772 00:55:03,128 --> 00:55:06,169 I don't know. It was the only thing I ever liked doing. 773 00:55:06,294 --> 00:55:08,544 Pretending to be someone else. 774 00:55:08,628 --> 00:55:12,794 I've been so out of it lately, the only parts I get offered are playing handicapped people. 775 00:55:12,919 --> 00:55:14,878 - That is not funny. 776 00:55:14,961 --> 00:55:17,336 Oh, come on. You gotta see that's a joke. 777 00:55:17,461 --> 00:55:21,336 If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you'd like. 778 00:55:21,461 --> 00:55:23,461 All right, so what are we laughing at you about? 779 00:55:23,586 --> 00:55:27,086 Mm. I lied again. 780 00:55:27,169 --> 00:55:31,253 - I have epilepsy. - Which part are we laughing about? 781 00:55:32,461 --> 00:55:35,003 I, um... 782 00:55:35,128 --> 00:55:37,378 I had a seizure at the law office where I work. 783 00:55:37,461 --> 00:55:40,794 And they told me their insurance wouldn't cover me unless I wore preventative covering. 784 00:55:40,919 --> 00:55:45,586 - What's preventative covering? - The helmet I was wearing. 785 00:55:45,669 --> 00:55:47,586 Oh, come on! 786 00:55:47,669 --> 00:55:49,586 That's funny. That's really funny. 787 00:55:49,669 --> 00:55:51,919 I mean, I'm the only person who wears a helmet to work... 788 00:55:52,044 --> 00:55:56,669 who isn't, like, putting out fires, or, like, racing for NASCAR. 789 00:55:56,794 --> 00:56:00,378 Well, what do you do? I mean, I can't quit. Their insurance is amazing. 790 00:56:00,461 --> 00:56:02,919 What do you do? You laugh, you know? 791 00:56:03,003 --> 00:56:07,544 I'm not saying I don't cry. But in-between, I laugh. 792 00:56:07,628 --> 00:56:10,711 And I realize how silly it is to take anything too seriously. 793 00:56:12,461 --> 00:56:15,586 Plus, I look forward to a good cry. 794 00:56:15,669 --> 00:56:17,586 Feels pretty good. 795 00:56:19,503 --> 00:56:22,753 I haven't cried since I was a little kid. 796 00:56:22,878 --> 00:56:27,003 I didn't cry at my mother's funeral. I tried, you know? 797 00:56:27,128 --> 00:56:29,253 I thought of all the saddest things I could think of. 798 00:56:29,378 --> 00:56:33,169 Like, things in movies, this... 799 00:56:33,294 --> 00:56:35,628 There's this image from Life magazine that's always haunted me. 800 00:56:35,711 --> 00:56:38,253 I just focused in on it, you know? 801 00:56:38,378 --> 00:56:41,086 But nothing came. 802 00:56:41,169 --> 00:56:43,128 That actually made me sadder than anything... 803 00:56:43,211 --> 00:56:45,669 the fact that I just felt so numb. 804 00:56:45,794 --> 00:56:48,461 - What do you mean? - Just that... 805 00:56:48,586 --> 00:56:51,669 Hey, Vagina! 806 00:56:51,794 --> 00:56:56,961 Hey, what's up, guys? Uh, Sam, that's Mark, Dave and you rememberJesse. 807 00:56:57,086 --> 00:56:59,086 - Hey. - What's up? 808 00:56:59,169 --> 00:57:02,169 Hey, nice to meet you. I'm sorry I said "vagina"just now. 809 00:57:02,294 --> 00:57:04,419 - I didn't know you were here. - Oh, that's okay. 810 00:57:04,503 --> 00:57:09,253 - Nice. Let's get fucked up. 811 00:57:10,503 --> 00:57:14,586 One, two, three! Whoo! 812 00:57:20,336 --> 00:57:24,003 - What are you doing? - Largeman, get the fuck in the pool! 813 00:57:24,128 --> 00:57:26,503 - It's so warm! 814 00:57:26,628 --> 00:57:29,003 Can't you swim? 815 00:57:29,128 --> 00:57:31,169 Of course I can swim. 816 00:57:49,378 --> 00:57:52,461 Dude, maybe you should stay on the steps. I don't know C.P.R. 817 00:57:53,669 --> 00:57:57,211 - You look like a wet beaver. 818 00:58:11,461 --> 00:58:14,794 There's a handful of normal kid things I kind of missed. 819 00:58:14,878 --> 00:58:18,628 There's a handful of normal kid things I kind of wish I'd missed. 820 00:58:20,461 --> 00:58:24,086 You know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in... 821 00:58:24,211 --> 00:58:26,128 isn't really your home anymore. 822 00:58:26,211 --> 00:58:29,836 All of a sudden, even though you have some place where you put your shit... 823 00:58:29,961 --> 00:58:32,419 that idea of home is gone. 824 00:58:34,794 --> 00:58:38,044 I still feel at home in my house. 825 00:58:38,128 --> 00:58:42,628 You'll see one day when you move out. Just sorta happens one day, and it's gone. 826 00:58:42,753 --> 00:58:46,294 You feel like you can never get it back. 827 00:58:46,419 --> 00:58:49,253 It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. 828 00:58:52,461 --> 00:58:54,961 Maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know? 829 00:58:55,086 --> 00:58:58,794 You won't ever have that feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself. 830 00:58:58,919 --> 00:59:02,086 You know, for... For your kids. For the family you start. 831 00:59:02,211 --> 00:59:04,669 It's like a cycle or something. 832 00:59:06,419 --> 00:59:09,336 I don't know. But I miss the idea of it, you know? 833 00:59:12,920 --> 00:59:16,420 Maybe that's all family really is. 834 00:59:16,545 --> 00:59:19,753 A group of people that miss the same imaginary place. 835 00:59:30,295 --> 00:59:32,253 Maybe. 836 00:59:44,586 --> 00:59:47,086 How about some fuckin' furniture, dude? 837 00:59:47,170 --> 00:59:49,753 I bought a chair, but I didn't like it. 838 00:59:49,836 --> 00:59:51,920 - Where is it? - It's keeping us warm. 839 01:00:01,003 --> 01:00:04,503 - Silent Velcro. 840 01:00:05,670 --> 01:00:08,211 - You lucky motherfucker. 841 01:00:08,295 --> 01:00:11,836 I feel like if I had showed up at school and presented the idea of silent Velcro... 842 01:00:11,961 --> 01:00:14,295 they would have sent me away a whole lot sooner. 843 01:00:14,420 --> 01:00:18,003 - Why did they send you away? - Oh. Listen to this girl. 844 01:00:18,128 --> 01:00:21,295 - They didn't "send me away." - You just said they sent you away. 845 01:00:21,420 --> 01:00:23,753 I mean, they sent me away. They sent me to boarding school. 846 01:00:23,836 --> 01:00:26,295 "Sent me away" sounds like I went to some asylum or something. 847 01:00:26,378 --> 01:00:30,003 - There were no straps involved. - Why did they send you to boarding school? 848 01:00:31,461 --> 01:00:33,670 They sent me to boarding school because... 849 01:00:33,795 --> 01:00:36,003 they thought I might be dangerous. 850 01:00:37,586 --> 01:00:39,878 "Oh, are you freaked out? You're like running for the door. 851 01:00:39,961 --> 01:00:42,253 - You can go. It's okay. Don't feel bad." - That's really funny. 852 01:00:42,378 --> 01:00:44,836 - It's really funny. 853 01:00:44,961 --> 01:00:46,836 Why would they think you'd be dangerous? 854 01:00:46,961 --> 01:00:49,503 You're like a little detective. 855 01:00:49,628 --> 01:00:51,420 - Want to know? - Yeah. 856 01:00:51,503 --> 01:00:54,378 - You're gay. 857 01:00:54,461 --> 01:00:57,545 No. Drumroll. 858 01:01:03,503 --> 01:01:05,920 I was the reason she was in a wheelchair. 859 01:01:07,003 --> 01:01:08,961 I pushed her. 860 01:01:10,336 --> 01:01:12,461 So there that is. 861 01:01:14,753 --> 01:01:17,003 - Shut up! - Fuck off. 862 01:01:17,128 --> 01:01:20,336 - No. That's the truth. - Why? 863 01:01:20,461 --> 01:01:22,628 It was just a complete freak accident, you know? 864 01:01:22,753 --> 01:01:25,920 It's one of those things you replay a million times in your head... 865 01:01:26,045 --> 01:01:29,753 and you see how clearly it was just a complete freak thing. 866 01:01:29,878 --> 01:01:32,920 My-My whole life, she was depressed for no reason. 867 01:01:33,045 --> 01:01:35,086 And... one day, you know... 868 01:01:35,170 --> 01:01:37,503 I was a little kid. I was nine years old... 869 01:01:37,628 --> 01:01:40,420 and I just hated her for that. 870 01:01:40,503 --> 01:01:42,961 And... I pushed her. 871 01:01:43,086 --> 01:01:45,461 And it was innocent. I was just completely frustrated. 872 01:01:45,586 --> 01:01:47,628 - 'Cause... - 'Cause you couldn't make her happy? 873 01:01:47,753 --> 01:01:51,128 Yeah! Fuck, yeah! And any other time, you know... 874 01:01:51,211 --> 01:01:54,836 any other day, she would havejust yelled at me and sent me to my room. 875 01:01:54,961 --> 01:01:57,586 But this day... 876 01:01:57,711 --> 01:02:00,295 on this particular day... 877 01:02:00,420 --> 01:02:04,253 the door of the dishwasher... 878 01:02:04,336 --> 01:02:06,836 had fallen open... the latch on it was broken. 879 01:02:06,961 --> 01:02:09,253 And it would just randomly fall open. 880 01:02:09,336 --> 01:02:12,086 That fuckin' latch, you know. 881 01:02:12,211 --> 01:02:17,003 It's really amazing how much of my life has been determined by a quarter-inch piece of plastic. 882 01:02:17,128 --> 01:02:19,003 But... 883 01:02:19,128 --> 01:02:21,836 So, anyway, she, uh... she fell back over the door... 884 01:02:21,961 --> 01:02:26,378 and, uh, hit her neck on the kitchen counter, paralyzing her from the waist down. 885 01:02:28,795 --> 01:02:32,253 - Wow. - Still want to compare fucked-up families? 886 01:02:32,336 --> 01:02:34,961 But your mom was in the wheelchair long before you left. 887 01:02:35,086 --> 01:02:38,086 Yeah. Well, I was nine. 888 01:02:38,170 --> 01:02:41,211 So they sent me to therapy and put me on these drugs... 889 01:02:41,295 --> 01:02:43,420 that were supposed to "curb my anger," 890 01:02:43,503 --> 01:02:46,420 and I've been on some form of them ever since. 891 01:02:46,503 --> 01:02:51,086 And when I was 16, my psychiatrist dad came around to the conclusion that... 892 01:02:51,211 --> 01:02:54,920 it probably wasn't the best environment for me to be growing up in, so... 893 01:02:55,045 --> 01:02:57,086 he sent me to boarding school. 894 01:02:57,211 --> 01:02:59,711 - And I haven't been home since. - Until now. 895 01:02:59,795 --> 01:03:03,420 - For her funeral. - Till now for her funeral. 896 01:03:05,628 --> 01:03:08,128 I can't believe the retarded quarterback's a pill-popper. 897 01:03:10,420 --> 01:03:12,336 - Jesse? 898 01:03:12,461 --> 01:03:15,253 Where's the sauna? 899 01:03:15,336 --> 01:03:17,836 - I'll show her. - No, l-I got it. 900 01:03:17,961 --> 01:03:20,211 - No, you get her a towel. - Wait. Wait. 901 01:03:23,336 --> 01:03:26,086 Want a ride, sweetheart? 902 01:03:37,795 --> 01:03:39,961 You're in it right now, aren't you? 903 01:03:40,086 --> 01:03:43,253 - What do you mean? - My mom always says that when she can see... 904 01:03:43,336 --> 01:03:46,961 I'm, like, working something out in my head, she's like, "You're in it right now." 905 01:03:47,086 --> 01:03:49,295 And I'm lookin' at you, and you're... 906 01:03:49,420 --> 01:03:52,336 telling me that story, and... 907 01:03:52,461 --> 01:03:54,586 you're definitely in it right now. 908 01:03:55,961 --> 01:03:58,378 I think you're right. I am in it. 909 01:04:01,295 --> 01:04:04,378 Okay. I mean, whatever. All right. Can we just change the subject, okay? 910 01:04:04,461 --> 01:04:07,253 Let's just... Let's just talk about good stuff. 911 01:04:07,336 --> 01:04:12,920 - Good stuff? - Yeah, like "glass half-full" shit. 912 01:04:13,003 --> 01:04:16,836 - What do you got? - Got a little buzz. Got that. 913 01:04:18,295 --> 01:04:20,545 - What you got? - I got a little buzz goin' 914 01:04:24,170 --> 01:04:26,128 And I like you. 915 01:04:33,670 --> 01:04:37,670 So there's that. I guess I have that. 916 01:04:43,795 --> 01:04:46,211 I can tap-dance. You want to see me tap-dance? 917 01:04:46,295 --> 01:04:48,503 I would love to see you tap-dance. 918 01:06:12,628 --> 01:06:17,212 - What are you doing? - You collect Desert Storm trading cards? 919 01:06:17,295 --> 01:06:19,837 Fuck yeah. Those things are collector's items, man. 920 01:06:19,962 --> 01:06:22,670 You have any idea how much those things are gonna be worth one day? 921 01:06:22,795 --> 01:06:25,420 - Really? - Hell, yeah. That's just like an investment. 922 01:06:25,503 --> 01:06:27,462 I have lots of little investments all over the place. 923 01:06:27,587 --> 01:06:30,503 One day I'm gonna sell all of'em just fuckin' live off of it. 924 01:06:31,795 --> 01:06:33,795 So, like how much is this one worth? 925 01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:38,087 - Which? - "Night Vision Goggles." 926 01:06:38,212 --> 01:06:41,378 I don't know. Mint? Uh, two, maybe three. 927 01:06:41,462 --> 01:06:43,545 - Dollars? - Yeah. 928 01:06:43,628 --> 01:06:47,003 It's too early. You don't sell 'em yet. Don't you know anything about investing? 929 01:06:47,128 --> 01:06:49,128 I'm gonna live off that shit. 930 01:06:49,253 --> 01:06:51,795 If you have a complete set, it's worth, like, thousands. 931 01:06:51,920 --> 01:06:55,545 - So do you have the complete set? - Almost. 932 01:06:55,628 --> 01:06:59,253 The corners are bent on my "Friendly Fire," and someone stole my "Wolf Blitzer." 933 01:07:05,962 --> 01:07:08,962 Now, look. Whaddya got to do today? 'Cause, uh... 934 01:07:09,087 --> 01:07:11,128 I got you a little going-away present... 935 01:07:11,253 --> 01:07:15,670 but, uh, I gotta kind of track it down first. 936 01:07:15,795 --> 01:07:20,295 - So can you give me a ride? - Uh, yeah. I just, uh... 937 01:07:20,420 --> 01:07:24,712 - What? - No, nothin'. I just, uh... 938 01:07:24,795 --> 01:07:27,295 Say it. Speak. 939 01:07:29,795 --> 01:07:32,628 I kinda told Sam I was gonna hang out with her today. 940 01:07:32,753 --> 01:07:35,795 - So, uh... - She can come. I don't care. 941 01:08:38,962 --> 01:08:40,962 I can't believe we're in fucking Handi-World. 942 01:08:41,045 --> 01:08:42,962 I really don't want to be in Handi-World. 943 01:08:43,045 --> 01:08:45,628 We're getting money for your present. Don't look so guilty. 944 01:08:45,753 --> 01:08:48,753 - How do I look guilty? - Andrew Largeman? 945 01:08:48,878 --> 01:08:50,795 - Oh, no. Benson. - Oh, no. 946 01:08:50,920 --> 01:08:52,878 - Who is that? - Just don't give him your number. 947 01:08:52,962 --> 01:08:55,087 Hey, man. What's up? 948 01:08:55,212 --> 01:08:57,128 - Holy shit! - How's it goin'? 949 01:08:57,212 --> 01:09:00,170 - I haven't seen you since, like, junior year. - Yeah. 950 01:09:00,295 --> 01:09:04,087 - I thought you killed yourself. - What? 951 01:09:05,212 --> 01:09:07,128 I thought you killed yourself. 952 01:09:07,253 --> 01:09:10,753 - That wasn't you? - No, no. That wasn't me. 953 01:09:10,837 --> 01:09:14,337 - Who killed themselves? - That was the Gleason kid. 954 01:09:14,462 --> 01:09:16,003 - Oh. - Oh, and Tina. 955 01:09:16,128 --> 01:09:18,087 - Tina who? - You remember Tina. 956 01:09:18,170 --> 01:09:20,962 - She was anorexic, did gymnastics... - Oh, gymnastics Tina? 957 01:09:21,087 --> 01:09:24,170 - How'd she do it? - I don't know. She wasn'tJewish. I didn't bury her. 958 01:09:24,295 --> 01:09:28,670 I think it was sleeping pills. Or that car in the garage thing. I forgot. 959 01:09:31,712 --> 01:09:34,337 - Uh, sorry, this is Sam, Karl. Karl, Sam? - Hey. 960 01:09:34,462 --> 01:09:36,837 - Hey. - I gotta go find that thing. 961 01:09:36,962 --> 01:09:40,337 - Uh, you two stay here. I'll be right back. - Is it heavy, or... Okay. 962 01:09:40,462 --> 01:09:44,753 - Hey, weren't you on a TV show or something? - Yeah, it was just this show. 963 01:09:44,878 --> 01:09:47,087 So, uh, you're like workin' here. That's cool. 964 01:09:47,170 --> 01:09:50,378 Only for a little while. I'm opening my own business. 965 01:09:50,462 --> 01:09:52,462 Actually, I should talk to you about it. 966 01:09:52,587 --> 01:09:55,337 I'm lookin' for smart people like you, Large. 967 01:09:55,462 --> 01:09:59,795 - I should get your number. - Yeah, definitely. That'd be... That'd be cool. 968 01:09:59,920 --> 01:10:02,378 I'd like to talk to you... both... 969 01:10:02,462 --> 01:10:07,420 about a good opportunity for you and your loved ones. 970 01:10:07,545 --> 01:10:09,670 We all have dreams. I know I do! 971 01:10:09,795 --> 01:10:14,045 I'd like to talk to you about an exciting opportunity that people are talking about. 972 01:10:14,128 --> 01:10:17,253 - We gotta get goin'. - Oh, okay. It was good to see you, Karl. 973 01:10:17,378 --> 01:10:19,295 - Hey, I should get your number. - Yeah, definitely. 974 01:10:19,378 --> 01:10:22,212 Well, I'll call you because I think he has it in his book. 975 01:10:22,295 --> 01:10:24,212 Nice to meet you. 976 01:10:24,295 --> 01:10:27,170 Why is it always the losers that get caught up in the pyramid schemes? 977 01:10:27,295 --> 01:10:30,628 Why can't it be some charming, hot girl nagging you incessantly to buy some shit? 978 01:10:30,753 --> 01:10:34,170 - Is that what he's doin'? - Yeah. It's detergent or some shit. 979 01:10:34,295 --> 01:10:37,337 Why are you buying knives? I don't need knives. 980 01:10:37,462 --> 01:10:40,295 - I'd like to return these. - You got a receipt? 981 01:10:40,420 --> 01:10:44,503 - Actually, no. They're a gift. - Why are you returning these? 982 01:10:44,628 --> 01:10:47,837 - They're not sharp enough. - They're not sharp enough? 983 01:10:47,962 --> 01:10:50,295 No. Not for what we need them for. 984 01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:54,337 - They couldn't cut cans. - You bought them to cut cans? 985 01:10:54,462 --> 01:10:57,753 No, but in the commercial, it said if I wanted to cut cans, I could. 986 01:10:57,878 --> 01:11:00,795 - With these knives, I can't. - It comes with a sharpener. 987 01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:05,962 - Did you try it? - Yeah. They're just... 988 01:11:06,087 --> 01:11:09,545 - I don't want them. They're not sharp enough. - Okay. 989 01:11:12,962 --> 01:11:16,337 A major loophole in the Handi-World return policy is that they permit returns... 990 01:11:16,462 --> 01:11:19,378 without receipts on items below $40. 991 01:11:19,462 --> 01:11:21,503 So, how often do you go? 992 01:11:21,628 --> 01:11:25,337 I hit every employee once, and then I wait until they hire new ones. 993 01:11:25,462 --> 01:11:27,712 Luckily, nobody stays at Handi-World for very long. 994 01:11:27,795 --> 01:11:31,087 - Except for Karl Benson. - You know, Mark, it's my last day in town. 995 01:11:31,212 --> 01:11:33,878 - If you need money, I could loan you some. - I don't need your money. 996 01:11:33,962 --> 01:11:37,128 - I'm making my own right now. - Fuck, take Jesse's. The guy's a millionaire. 997 01:11:37,253 --> 01:11:39,587 I don't take anybody's money. Okay, Andrew? 998 01:11:39,670 --> 01:11:41,753 I make my own. Favors are bad news. 999 01:11:41,837 --> 01:11:45,212 The only thing worse than a favor is a favor involving money. Okay? 1000 01:11:46,837 --> 01:11:49,878 Let's go. I gotta see a guy about a nitrous tank. 1001 01:12:32,462 --> 01:12:36,337 - What is this place? 1002 01:12:36,462 --> 01:12:38,962 I think you can see into the hotel rooms. 1003 01:12:47,670 --> 01:12:51,628 Oh, yeah! Ohh! Ohh! Yeah! 1004 01:13:07,129 --> 01:13:09,295 I'm gonna fuckin' cum! 1005 01:13:12,837 --> 01:13:15,295 That shit was hot. That shit was hot. 1006 01:13:15,379 --> 01:13:17,920 I gotta go drop some knowledge on that ho right there. 1007 01:13:18,004 --> 01:13:20,587 How do you know she's a hooker? 1008 01:13:20,712 --> 01:13:22,837 Of course she's a fuckin' hooker. 1009 01:13:22,962 --> 01:13:25,920 Girls who look like her do not fuck guys that look like him... 1010 01:13:26,045 --> 01:13:28,295 unless it's for coke, money or fame. 1011 01:13:28,420 --> 01:13:31,504 Well, Julia Roberts married Lyle Lovett. 1012 01:13:31,629 --> 01:13:35,045 - Who the fuck are you? - This is Sam. This is Large. 1013 01:13:35,129 --> 01:13:38,420 No offense, man. But why are you bringing these fuckin' people here? 1014 01:13:38,504 --> 01:13:41,337 This is the guy who needs that thing. Wait. 1015 01:13:41,462 --> 01:13:44,420 I brought you the tank. Okay? 1016 01:13:44,545 --> 01:13:48,087 - Could you just tell us where to go now? - That thing come with balloons? 1017 01:13:48,212 --> 01:13:51,295 What am I, a fuckin' birthday clown? No. It doesn't come with balloons. 1018 01:13:51,420 --> 01:13:54,170 Suck it off the tap. And I need it back when you're done... 1019 01:13:54,295 --> 01:13:56,504 - because that guy's holdin' my 39 bucks. - All right. 1020 01:13:56,629 --> 01:13:58,504 Hold up. Hold up! 1021 01:13:58,629 --> 01:14:00,962 Who here just saw some titties? 1022 01:14:01,087 --> 01:14:05,754 Raise you hand if you just saw some titties. Hmm? 1023 01:14:09,337 --> 01:14:12,420 Thank you! So everybody just calm the fuck down! 1024 01:14:13,795 --> 01:14:17,212 Now. You know where Kiernan's Quarry is? 1025 01:14:17,295 --> 01:14:20,004 - Down in Newark, right? - Yeah. 1026 01:14:20,129 --> 01:14:22,212 It's at the bottom of Hillside and Rivington. 1027 01:14:22,295 --> 01:14:24,754 You can't really see it from the street, but it's there. 1028 01:14:24,837 --> 01:14:27,670 Park your car at the gate and hop the fence. 1029 01:14:27,795 --> 01:14:32,379 At the bottom of the quarry, there's this junkyard run by this guy named... Albert. 1030 01:14:32,462 --> 01:14:35,545 He's the one that tracked down the piece you're lookin'for. All right? 1031 01:14:35,629 --> 01:14:38,129 I'll call him right now and tell him to expect you. 1032 01:14:38,254 --> 01:14:41,212 Okay, stop. What the fuck are we doin'? 1033 01:14:41,295 --> 01:14:43,420 - Just be patient, man. - We've been patient all day... 1034 01:14:43,504 --> 01:14:45,837 but it's my last day and you haven't told us what we're doin'. 1035 01:14:45,962 --> 01:14:48,629 If you told me we were going on a six-hour hunt for blow, I would've passed. 1036 01:14:48,754 --> 01:14:52,879 If I was gonna get you coke, we would've gone to the fuckin' high school football practice. 1037 01:14:52,962 --> 01:14:55,129 We would have been rolling five hours ago. 1038 01:14:55,254 --> 01:14:57,212 I think we corrupted this innocent girl enough. 1039 01:14:57,295 --> 01:15:00,629 - I'm not innocent! - Yes, you are! All right? That's what I like about you. 1040 01:15:00,754 --> 01:15:03,629 I don't want this guy taking you to, like, some sketchy quarry... 1041 01:15:03,754 --> 01:15:06,712 in the middle of nowhere to find, like, crack whores huffing turpentine... 1042 01:15:06,795 --> 01:15:10,379 or pit bulls raping each other or whatever it is you have us doing! 1043 01:15:11,795 --> 01:15:15,504 Wow. That's like the most worked-up I've ever seen you. 1044 01:15:15,629 --> 01:15:19,212 - He was protecting me. - So? 1045 01:15:19,295 --> 01:15:22,462 - He likes me. - Don't be cute. 1046 01:15:22,587 --> 01:15:24,879 He's my knight in shining armor. 1047 01:15:24,962 --> 01:15:28,295 Don't talk about knights in front of Mark. It's a sore subject. 1048 01:15:30,254 --> 01:15:33,879 - I'm gonna kill that motherfucker. - Pun intended? 1049 01:15:33,962 --> 01:15:36,754 - Oh, you're fuckin'... 1050 01:15:39,504 --> 01:15:42,087 Oh, oh, oh, oh! 1051 01:15:42,170 --> 01:15:44,129 Ow! Ow! 1052 01:15:46,254 --> 01:15:48,629 - Oh, my God. - Wow! 1053 01:15:48,712 --> 01:15:50,670 I never even knew this was here. 1054 01:15:50,795 --> 01:15:53,837 I've heard about it. They were supposed to build a mall here, I think. 1055 01:15:53,962 --> 01:15:57,462 Yeah. I remember reading about that in the paper, that they were... 1056 01:15:57,587 --> 01:16:00,420 digging or something, and they break into this natural phenomenon. 1057 01:16:00,504 --> 01:16:02,879 It's like an underground Grand Canyon or something. 1058 01:16:02,962 --> 01:16:06,379 Now they're in some huge legal battle over whether they can build here or not. 1059 01:16:06,462 --> 01:16:10,462 Can you imagine the guy whose job it is to fight for his right to build a mall... 1060 01:16:10,587 --> 01:16:12,837 - on some, like, geological phenomenon? 1061 01:16:12,962 --> 01:16:15,962 They love their malls here, man. 1062 01:16:16,087 --> 01:16:18,545 All right. Let's find this guy and get out of here. 1063 01:16:18,629 --> 01:16:22,212 - You're not gonna tell us what we're getting? - It's a surprise. You'll see. 1064 01:16:22,295 --> 01:16:25,045 - I think it's gonna rain. 1065 01:16:29,795 --> 01:16:33,337 So this is it. 1066 01:16:33,462 --> 01:16:38,587 So knock! Knock and barter for Desert Storm trading cards. 1067 01:16:38,670 --> 01:16:42,254 Don't tease me about my hobbies. I don't tease you about being an asshole. 1068 01:16:44,295 --> 01:16:46,379 Okay! 1069 01:16:57,795 --> 01:16:59,754 - Mark? - Yeah. Albert? 1070 01:17:00,920 --> 01:17:02,962 Come on in. 1071 01:17:06,587 --> 01:17:10,170 Oh, man. You guys must be freezing. 1072 01:17:10,295 --> 01:17:13,420 Make yourselves warm by the fire. I'm just gonna go put her down. 1073 01:17:13,545 --> 01:17:15,587 Okay? I'll be right back out. 1074 01:17:21,545 --> 01:17:25,587 Ah, I must say, I'm continually impressed with how each place you bring us... 1075 01:17:25,712 --> 01:17:29,045 - continues to be weirder and weirder. - What do you mean? This is nice. 1076 01:17:29,129 --> 01:17:32,962 Oh, nothing. Just hangin' out on an old boat at the bottom of a quarry in Newark. 1077 01:17:33,087 --> 01:17:35,212 It's hardly the bottom, dude. 1078 01:17:35,295 --> 01:17:37,295 Did you check out that cliff down there? 1079 01:17:37,379 --> 01:17:41,212 Hey! This is my wife, Faye. 1080 01:17:41,295 --> 01:17:43,754 Hi! Welcome. 1081 01:17:43,837 --> 01:17:46,920 Please. Have a seat. Make yourselves comfortable. 1082 01:17:50,295 --> 01:17:52,837 Man, it's really comin' down out there. 1083 01:17:52,962 --> 01:17:54,962 - It just started pouring all of a sudden. - Well... 1084 01:17:55,087 --> 01:17:59,420 in a bad storm, I like to pretend that this old boat's my own private ark. 1085 01:17:59,504 --> 01:18:02,587 Um, unfortunately, if this is the apocalypse... 1086 01:18:02,670 --> 01:18:05,754 - I'm not quite sure it still floats. - Yeah, I don't know. 1087 01:18:05,837 --> 01:18:09,504 - Listen, would anybody like some tea? - I'd love some. Thank you. 1088 01:18:09,629 --> 01:18:12,545 - Do you want some? I'll be right back. 1089 01:18:13,962 --> 01:18:16,795 What is this place? What is it that you do down here? 1090 01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:18,920 Well, we're calling it Kiernan's Fault. It's, uh... 1091 01:18:19,004 --> 01:18:22,004 No one really knows what it is because we haven't been able to explore it. 1092 01:18:22,129 --> 01:18:25,004 Meanwhile, while they're locked in litigation, they hired me... 1093 01:18:25,129 --> 01:18:28,712 - to make sure no one comes inside. - Wow. 1094 01:18:28,795 --> 01:18:32,629 But what they don't know is that at night I climb down. 1095 01:18:32,754 --> 01:18:35,545 So, how deep does it go? Thank you. 1096 01:18:35,629 --> 01:18:38,170 You know... Thank you. No one really knows. 1097 01:18:38,295 --> 01:18:41,129 But I like to pretend it's infinite. 1098 01:18:41,254 --> 01:18:43,920 It's kind of an odd job. 1099 01:18:44,004 --> 01:18:48,129 - Guardian of an infinite abyss. - Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is. 1100 01:18:48,254 --> 01:18:50,712 But we also trade and deal in antique jewelry. 1101 01:18:52,087 --> 01:18:56,004 I suppose it is odd that we live down here like this. 1102 01:18:56,129 --> 01:18:59,004 - No. - Not at all. - Never crossed my mind. 1103 01:18:59,129 --> 01:19:02,462 Well, we think it's important. 1104 01:19:02,587 --> 01:19:06,670 Why? What is it that you think you're gonna find? 1105 01:19:06,795 --> 01:19:09,420 I guess I just like the idea of discovering something. 1106 01:19:09,504 --> 01:19:12,754 Of doing something that's completely unique... 1107 01:19:12,837 --> 01:19:14,837 that's never been done before. 1108 01:19:14,962 --> 01:19:18,004 - "Albert's Abyss." - Well, maybe. Who knows? 1109 01:19:18,129 --> 01:19:21,545 But, you know what? That's all ego. 1110 01:19:21,629 --> 01:19:25,420 None of that really matters. If I get to be with this person right here... 1111 01:19:25,504 --> 01:19:28,295 and our beautiful baby... 1112 01:19:29,379 --> 01:19:31,337 that's all I need. 1113 01:19:35,962 --> 01:19:39,587 Well, I suppose you want what you came all the way down here for. 1114 01:19:39,670 --> 01:19:41,629 Oh, yeah. That'd be great. 1115 01:19:41,754 --> 01:19:44,337 It took me a while to track this piece down... 1116 01:19:44,462 --> 01:19:46,754 but I owed Diego huge. 1117 01:19:49,295 --> 01:19:51,170 That's it. Thank you so much. 1118 01:19:51,295 --> 01:19:53,920 - Yeah. - Really. 1119 01:19:54,004 --> 01:19:58,337 Good luck in the rain. Um, do you guys want some garbage bags or something? 1120 01:20:00,004 --> 01:20:02,420 - Yeah. - Okay. That'd be great. 1121 01:20:14,837 --> 01:20:16,796 Good-bye! 1122 01:20:17,962 --> 01:20:20,879 - Hey, Albert! - Yeah? 1123 01:20:22,254 --> 01:20:24,462 Good luck exploring the infinite abyss. 1124 01:20:24,587 --> 01:20:27,046 Thank you. Hey! 1125 01:20:29,462 --> 01:20:31,671 You too. 1126 01:21:44,462 --> 01:21:47,421 Whoo! 1127 01:22:42,587 --> 01:22:46,962 So, uh, I don't know if I'm gonna see you, man. 1128 01:22:48,712 --> 01:22:51,171 Don't you want to know what's in the bag? 1129 01:22:52,587 --> 01:22:55,087 To be honest, I don't even care anymore. 1130 01:23:01,962 --> 01:23:03,921 What is it? 1131 01:23:06,421 --> 01:23:08,837 It's my mom's favorite necklace. 1132 01:23:08,962 --> 01:23:12,379 I'd be lying to you if I told you it was my plan all along. 1133 01:23:12,504 --> 01:23:16,087 But... I got it back to you, right? That's gotta be worth something. 1134 01:23:18,171 --> 01:23:20,296 This whole day was about this? 1135 01:23:22,546 --> 01:23:24,754 You didn't want it down there with her. 1136 01:23:24,837 --> 01:23:27,129 It's better it's with you. 1137 01:23:27,254 --> 01:23:28,837 Okay. 1138 01:23:33,004 --> 01:23:36,796 Hey! If you ever need a Kato, you know where to find me. 1139 01:23:51,629 --> 01:23:54,879 It's funny. This, uh... 1140 01:23:54,962 --> 01:23:58,796 This necklace reminds me of this really random memory of my mother. 1141 01:24:01,212 --> 01:24:05,254 I was a little kid, and I was cryin' for one reason or another. 1142 01:24:05,379 --> 01:24:07,337 And, uh... 1143 01:24:10,629 --> 01:24:14,254 She was just like, you know, cradling me and rocking me back and forth. 1144 01:24:14,337 --> 01:24:18,879 I can remember seeing the little balls in this thing just floating back and forth. 1145 01:24:18,962 --> 01:24:20,962 And, uh... 1146 01:24:22,837 --> 01:24:26,296 And there was just, like, snot dripping down my nose, right? 1147 01:24:26,379 --> 01:24:28,837 And, uh... 1148 01:24:28,962 --> 01:24:32,087 She gave me her sleeve... 1149 01:24:32,212 --> 01:24:35,046 and she told me to blow my nose into it. 1150 01:24:40,546 --> 01:24:44,171 And I remember thinking, even as a little kid, like... 1151 01:24:44,296 --> 01:24:46,254 "Wow! 1152 01:24:49,796 --> 01:24:52,421 This is love." 1153 01:24:55,379 --> 01:24:57,462 "This is love." 1154 01:24:58,712 --> 01:25:02,212 Large? I think I see one. 1155 01:25:02,296 --> 01:25:04,796 - Shut up. - Yeah, I do. Wait. Wait, wait. 1156 01:25:04,921 --> 01:25:07,254 We should save it or something. 1157 01:25:09,504 --> 01:25:13,504 Okay. Don't move. Okay. 1158 01:25:17,796 --> 01:25:20,962 We could put it in my scrapbook, if I had a scrapbook. 1159 01:25:21,087 --> 01:25:25,129 - That it? - I think so. I don't really feel any more coming. 1160 01:25:26,879 --> 01:25:29,796 Well, if you do, just let me know. I'll get the cup, okay? 1161 01:25:31,171 --> 01:25:33,546 This was such a good idea. 1162 01:25:33,629 --> 01:25:36,087 - Who are you? - I'm your new friend Sam. 1163 01:25:36,171 --> 01:25:38,587 - Tissue? 1164 01:25:43,421 --> 01:25:45,879 Come here. 1165 01:25:55,171 --> 01:25:57,546 Fuck, this hurts so much. 1166 01:25:57,629 --> 01:25:59,587 Yeah, I know. 1167 01:26:00,671 --> 01:26:02,629 But that is life. 1168 01:26:04,212 --> 01:26:06,962 If nothing else, that's life, you know. 1169 01:26:07,087 --> 01:26:11,462 It's real. Sometimes it fuckin' hurts. 1170 01:26:13,921 --> 01:26:17,254 To be honest, it's sort of all we have. 1171 01:26:26,046 --> 01:26:28,129 How are you feelin'? 1172 01:26:30,837 --> 01:26:32,796 Safe. 1173 01:26:35,296 --> 01:26:38,087 When I'm with you, I feel so safe. 1174 01:26:40,379 --> 01:26:42,712 Like I'm home. 1175 01:27:25,463 --> 01:27:28,713 But did not make it. The driver died on impact. 1176 01:27:28,796 --> 01:27:31,296 - Dad. 1177 01:27:34,004 --> 01:27:36,421 - Come on in. - I'm sorry I woke you up. 1178 01:27:36,504 --> 01:27:38,463 No, I was just reading. 1179 01:27:39,588 --> 01:27:41,463 Where have you been? 1180 01:27:43,254 --> 01:27:45,129 Everywhere. 1181 01:27:45,254 --> 01:27:48,004 Been on sort of a crazy journey these last couple days. 1182 01:27:48,129 --> 01:27:50,171 You've been avoiding me. 1183 01:27:50,296 --> 01:27:52,963 No, I haven't been. Come on. 1184 01:27:54,629 --> 01:27:58,171 Okay, maybe I have been. 1185 01:27:58,296 --> 01:28:03,171 I'm sure you can find lots of things in your life... 1186 01:28:03,296 --> 01:28:05,171 that you can be angry about. 1187 01:28:05,296 --> 01:28:09,421 But what I do not understand is why you're so angry at me. 1188 01:28:09,546 --> 01:28:11,963 All I ever wanted was for everyone to be happy again. 1189 01:28:12,088 --> 01:28:14,921 - That's all I ever wanted. - When were we all ever happy, Dad? 1190 01:28:15,004 --> 01:28:16,921 You always say that, but when was that? 1191 01:28:17,004 --> 01:28:18,963 When was this time that we were all so happy? 1192 01:28:19,088 --> 01:28:22,838 'Cause I don't have it in my memory. Maybe if I did, I could help steer us back there. 1193 01:28:22,963 --> 01:28:25,963 But I just... 1194 01:28:26,088 --> 01:28:28,254 You know, you and I need to work on being okay... 1195 01:28:28,338 --> 01:28:30,254 if that's not in the cards for us. 1196 01:28:32,879 --> 01:28:35,171 Well, we might have a shot at it... 1197 01:28:35,296 --> 01:28:37,588 if you can forgive yourself for what you did. 1198 01:28:39,129 --> 01:28:42,796 What I did. What I did. 1199 01:28:42,921 --> 01:28:46,046 Okay, let's-let's do it. Okay, we're here, right? Le-Let's do it! 1200 01:28:46,129 --> 01:28:48,421 I'm gonna forgive myself for what I did. Are you ready? 1201 01:28:48,504 --> 01:28:52,171 I was a little boy, and somebody made a shitty latch. 1202 01:28:52,296 --> 01:28:55,338 That's what I think. That's what I think about the whole thing, okay? 1203 01:28:55,463 --> 01:28:59,004 And I'm not gonna take those drugs anymore. They left me completely fuckin' numb. 1204 01:28:59,129 --> 01:29:02,754 I have felt so fucking numb to everything I have experienced in my life, okay? 1205 01:29:02,879 --> 01:29:04,796 And for that... 1206 01:29:05,796 --> 01:29:08,088 For that, I'm here to forgive you. 1207 01:29:09,963 --> 01:29:13,296 You always said all you wanted was for us to have whatever it is we wanted. 1208 01:29:13,421 --> 01:29:16,796 Maybe what Mom wanted more than anything was for it to all be over. 1209 01:29:20,129 --> 01:29:22,046 And for me... 1210 01:29:22,129 --> 01:29:25,838 what I want more than anything in the world is for it to be okay with you... 1211 01:29:25,963 --> 01:29:27,921 for me to feel something again. 1212 01:29:28,963 --> 01:29:30,921 Even if it's pain. 1213 01:29:32,838 --> 01:29:35,254 Well, you're going against your doctor's recommendation. 1214 01:29:35,338 --> 01:29:38,129 That's a pretty weighty experiment to take on, don't you think? 1215 01:29:43,504 --> 01:29:46,338 This is my life, Dad. 1216 01:29:46,463 --> 01:29:48,421 This is it. 1217 01:29:48,546 --> 01:29:50,713 I spent 26 years waiting for something else to start. 1218 01:29:50,796 --> 01:29:53,171 So, no, no, I don't think it's too much to take on... 1219 01:29:53,296 --> 01:29:55,171 because it's everything there is. 1220 01:29:56,296 --> 01:29:58,338 I see now it's all there is. 1221 01:30:02,379 --> 01:30:05,296 You and I are going to be okay. You know that, right? 1222 01:30:11,754 --> 01:30:15,421 We may not be as happy as you always dreamed we would be, but... 1223 01:30:19,879 --> 01:30:24,588 for the first time, let's just allow ourselves to be whatever it is we are. 1224 01:30:27,463 --> 01:30:29,421 And that'll be better, okay? 1225 01:30:33,713 --> 01:30:36,421 I think that'll be better. 1226 01:30:56,629 --> 01:30:59,421 What are you thinking about? 1227 01:30:59,546 --> 01:31:02,046 - You're not coming back, are you? - Come on, Sam. 1228 01:31:02,129 --> 01:31:04,129 - Of course I am. - No, you're not. 1229 01:31:04,254 --> 01:31:08,046 You don't realize this is good. This doesn't happen often. 1230 01:31:08,129 --> 01:31:10,129 In your life, you know? I mean, this... 1231 01:31:11,463 --> 01:31:13,713 We can work this stuff out. 1232 01:31:13,796 --> 01:31:16,463 I want to help you, you know? 1233 01:31:16,588 --> 01:31:19,754 We need each other. I haven't even lied in, like, two days. 1234 01:31:20,963 --> 01:31:23,213 Is that true? 1235 01:31:23,296 --> 01:31:26,046 - No. 1236 01:31:28,588 --> 01:31:30,463 Look, this isn't... 1237 01:31:30,588 --> 01:31:32,963 This isn't a conversation about this being over. 1238 01:31:33,088 --> 01:31:35,254 It's... It's... 1239 01:31:35,338 --> 01:31:37,796 I'm not puttin' a period at the end of this, you know? 1240 01:31:37,921 --> 01:31:41,088 I'm puttin', like, an ellipsis on it. 1241 01:31:41,213 --> 01:31:43,713 Because I'm-I'm worried that if I don't go figure myself out... 1242 01:31:43,796 --> 01:31:46,088 if I don't go, like, land on my own two feet... 1243 01:31:46,171 --> 01:31:49,546 then I'm gonna fuck this whole thing up, and this is too important. 1244 01:31:55,129 --> 01:31:57,213 I gotta go. l... 1245 01:31:57,296 --> 01:32:00,296 Gotta go. 1246 01:32:00,421 --> 01:32:03,254 I fired my psychiatrist. I gotta go find a new one. 1247 01:32:05,963 --> 01:32:08,171 Look, I'm gonna call you when I get there. 1248 01:32:10,004 --> 01:32:12,421 I'm gonna call you. 1249 01:32:18,129 --> 01:32:20,296 Look at me. 1250 01:32:22,421 --> 01:32:24,379 Look at me. 1251 01:32:31,838 --> 01:32:34,046 You changed my life. 1252 01:32:40,338 --> 01:32:43,296 You changed my life, and I've known you four days. 1253 01:32:48,463 --> 01:32:50,921 This is the beginning of something really big. 1254 01:32:53,463 --> 01:32:55,421 But right now, I gotta go. 1255 01:33:03,088 --> 01:33:05,588 Come here. 1256 01:33:19,796 --> 01:33:21,796 Final boarding call for all... 1257 01:34:20,130 --> 01:34:22,546 Take your seats as quickly as possible. 1258 01:34:33,880 --> 01:34:38,130 - What are you doing? - Remember that idea I had about working stuff out on my own... 1259 01:34:38,255 --> 01:34:41,046 - and then finding you once I figured stuff out? - The ellipsis? 1260 01:34:41,130 --> 01:34:43,796 Yeah. The ellipsis. It's dumb. It's dumb. It's an awful idea. 1261 01:34:43,921 --> 01:34:47,255 And I'm not gonna do it, okay? 'Cause like you said, this is it. 1262 01:34:47,338 --> 01:34:49,255 This is life... 1263 01:34:49,338 --> 01:34:52,671 and I'm in love with you, Samantha. 1264 01:34:52,796 --> 01:34:56,213 I think that's the only thing I've ever been really sure of in my entire life. 1265 01:34:56,296 --> 01:34:59,296 I'm really messed up now, and I got a lot of stuff I gotta work out. 1266 01:34:59,421 --> 01:35:02,463 But I don't want to waste any more of my life without you in it, okay? 1267 01:35:02,588 --> 01:35:05,463 - Yeah. - And I think I can do this! I mean, I want to. 1268 01:35:05,588 --> 01:35:07,213 - We have to, right? - Yeah! 1269 01:35:07,296 --> 01:35:09,421 - Right? - Yes! 1270 01:35:11,921 --> 01:35:13,880 So what do we do? 1271 01:35:19,546 --> 01:35:21,671 What do we do? 1272 01:35:22,305 --> 01:35:28,928 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 103332

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.