All language subtitles for Ally.McBeal.S05E09.2001.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.AAC-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

♪♪ (Pop)

♪ The wayward wind ♪

♪ Was a restless wind ♪

♪ A restless wind ♪

♪ That yearns to wander ♪

♪ And she was born ♪

♪ The next of kin ♪

♪ The next of kin ♪

♪ To the wayward wind ♪

♪ In a lonely shack by a railroad track ♪

♪ He spent his younger days ♪

♪ And I guess the sound
of the outward bound ♪

♪ Made him a slave ♪

♪ To his wanderin' ways ♪

♪ And the wayward wind ♪

♪ Is a restless wind ♪

♪ A restless wind ♪

♪ That yearns to wander ♪

♪ And she was born ♪

♪ The next of kin ♪

♪ The next of kin ♪

♪ To the wayward wind ♪♪

-Can I help you?
-(gasps)

Who are you?

Nancy Sosha, real estate broker.

This house is for sale?

As of an hour ago. Just went into probate.

Do you have an offer sheet?

-Don't you want to know how much?
-Oh, okay. Uh, how much?

♪ I've been down down, down ♪

♪ I've been down this road ♪

♪ Walkin' the line
that's painted by pride ♪

♪ And I have made mistakes in my life ♪

♪ That I just can't hide ♪

♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪

♪ For what love has to bring Yeah ♪

♪ I got myself together, yeah ♪

♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪

♪ I've been searching my soul tonight ♪

♪ I know there's so much more to life ♪

♪ Now I know I can shine a light ♪

♪ To find my way back home ♪

-♪ Oh ♪
-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪

♪ Baby, yeah ♪

-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪
-♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

-You bought it?
-Mm-hmm. The offer was accepted.

-Fifteen-day escrow.
-The full asking?

-I didn't want to lose it.
-Ally, in today's market--

It's in probate, Richard.
The bank wanted to get rid of it quickly.

-And it's always been the house that I--
-Hi.

-I'm, uh, looking for Ally McBeal.
-Uh, yeah, um--

I'm Ally McBeal.

Oh, hello. I'm Michael Walker.

And, uh, I am in need of representation.

(giggles) Oh, okay.

Um--(clears throat) Hmm.
Why don't you come on into my office?

Thank you.

Had we met, I'm sure it would
have been a great honor.

All I did was go to sleep,
and when I woke up--

I can help you.

But I don't want anyone else to know.

And you have to promise
you won't tell anybody either.

-Why not?
-Just because.

A chiropractor? No.
Corretta, they're all quacks.

Not this one.

He's... different.

-Different how?
-Just... different.

You're not giving me much
information, Corretta.

Jenny, this man will fix your neck.

And that's all I'll tell you.

Uh, your wife went to a lot
of trouble here, Mr. Walker.

Yeah, she's tenacious.

She convinced a district attorney to
charge you with criminal fraud.

Well, do you have any idea
why she would do that?

Well, she's-- she's pretty angry.

Right. But can you tell me why she might
think that you defrauded her?

Yeah. Um, I ran out of money.

I'm sorry?

Well, I used to buy her gifts,
which she loved, of course.

But then we ran out of money.
It's as simple as that.

We were in the kitchen one night and, uh--

♪ Hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back ♪

♪ No more, no more no more, no more ♪

♪ Hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back no more ♪♪

She sang it?

Uh, no. No, she said it.

Probably.

-(clears throat)
-I don't know.

Every time she speaks
it sounds like a song to me.

Mr. Walker, I must
say that it's a little odd that you speak

of her with such affection.

Yeah. I love her.

But she's trying to put you into jail.

I think if I can solve the money problem,
everything will probably be okay.

Ooh, very tight. First time?

-What?
-With a chiropractor?

Oh. Yes.

Your back muscles are very tight.

Uh-huh.

Is this center, uh, accredited?

(chuckles) Yes, it's accredited.

Oh, please tell me you've never been sued.

Only once.

-(crack)
-(gasps)

Fence dispute with a neighbor.

(screams)

I won. How's the neck now?

Uh, it's okay. It's, uh...

good.

-It's a miracle.
-Mmm, not quite.

Right this way.

Right up here.

-Okay, lean forward.
-Uh, okay.

This makes me a little nervous.

-Um--
-Just take a second.

-(motor whirring)
-(grunting)

I'm just getting the knot
at the base of your neck out.

Uh-huh.

Try to relax.

Oh--

Oh, gee, gee, gee, gee.

(gasps, sighs)

(giggles)

(clears throat)

Well, what do you think?

-It's a dump.
-Oh, Richard.

Just--You know, just...
use your imagination.

I'm using my imagination. Otherwise
it's a condemned dump.

Oh, well, with painting,
a-a-and furnished--

Well, then it's a furnished dump.
Ally, th-this place is, uh--

-You just wait till I get done with it.
-(groans)

Uh, you get done with it? What do you
mean, when you get done with it?

-Yeah, I'm gonna do the work myself.
-Oh. Very funny.

No, I'm-I'm-I'm serious.

Basically it's stripping
and painting, a little board here,

a little board there and--

I can do it.

C-Can I help?

Wait, um, what di-- I'm sorry?

No, I-I've always wanted to strip and
paint and-and-- and do stuff like that.

Growing up, uh, my father never
even let me touch his hammer.

Can I?

Uh, well, I-- (laughs) I-I-I-I guess.

-(laughs)That's great.
-N-N-No, not-not-not now.

-No?
-Richard, I have to go to court.

-Oh, uh--Oh, yeah.
-Yes.

-(chuckles)
-Sure.

All right, I'll-- (clears throat)

Mrs. Walker, when you first
married your husband,

did you and he discuss an arrangement with
regards to income and support?

Yes. We agreed to both work.

Our marriage was supposed
to be a partnership.

Mm-hmm. Was this arrangement, which you
both agreed upon, fulfilled?

No. He spent the money
faster than it came in.

I spoke to him about it,
and he kept doing it.

In fact, things actually got worse.

-How so?
-We were living beyond our means.

Draining our savings.

He spent everything we had.

♪ Don Juan your money's gone ♪

♪ And when your money's gone ♪

♪ Yeah, your baby's gone ♪

I had to take a second job working as
a freelance photographer,

and he spent that as well.

Soon he was forging my name
as cosigner on bank loans.

Are-Are you all right?

He put us into such debt,
eventually we even lost our house.

I woke up broke...

because of him.

What did he spend the money on?

Oh, flowers, uh, jewelry, gifts.

No, no, no. Let me rephrase that.
Who did he spend the money on?

-Me.
-You?

Oh, he-he spent the money on you.

Eventually presenting me
with the romantic gift of bankruptcy.

Mrs. Walker, did you
ever return the gifts?

-No.
-In fact, you loved getting them.

♪ The best things in life are free ♪

♪ But you can save it
for the birds and the bees ♪

-♪ Just give me money ♪
-♪ That's what I want ♪

♪ Just give me money ♪♪

(fingers snapping)

Today I did not come here as a patient. I
want to hire you as an expert.

-An expert?
-Yeah.

-On what?
-Well, I believe that my client is ill.

Or at least, uh, um, uh, not... right.

And, um, th-this woman, his--his ex-wife,
she got him arrested.

And when she talks, he only hears a song.

And I would like to make the argument
th-th-that his actions are not voluntary.

Well, do you think that you could help me
out with that case?

Well, I'd at least have
to talk with him first.

You can listen to his testimony. His cross
is up first thing tomorrow.

(clears throat)

Ah, you've seen Ted.

Which is why we need to talk.

You're not feeling better?

No, I feel fine. Thank you.

Um, when you go to...

Ted,

does he ever put you
in this... massage chair?

And when you're in the chair, does...

Ted...

ever lean into you and
push his chin into your neck?

Mm-hmm.

And when he does that, I mean,
have you-- have you ever--

How... does he do that?

(sighs) It's not Ted.

-It isn't?
-It's the chair.

-The chair.
-Mmm.

(hammering)

-(hammering continues)
-(dog howling, barking)

-Ally?
-(gasps, sighs)

Oh! (laughs)

Oh, you-- Elaine, you scared me.

This is it?

Yeah. Yeah, i-isn't it great?

Well, are you really
gonna fix this up yourself?

Richard's helping-- What?

Wh-What, you don't-- you don't like
it? I know you have an imagination.

I-It's just--

Well, buying a house, Ally, that's
something that two people usually do.

You know, Elaine,
they do sell houses to single people.

It's been known to happen.

I realize that.

It's just such a commitment.

Is-Is there a particular reason
why you seem so sad?

No.

I'm thrilled for you.

-I just hope this doesn't mean--
-What?

Well, that you're committed
to living alone.

Elaine, I bought this house
because I love this house.

Great.

(laughs) Like I said,

I'm thrilled for you.

♪♪ (pop)

VONDA: ♪ Our house ♪

♪ Is a very, very very fine house ♪

♪ With two cats in the yard ♪

♪ Life used to be so hard ♪

-(gasps)
-♪ Now everything is easy ♪

♪ 'Cause of you ♪

♪ I'll light the fire ♪

♪ While you place the flowers ♪

♪ In the vase that you bought ♪

♪ Today-ay-ay-ay ♪♪

Richard, do you think that maybe
you could get some paint on the wall?

Nice. Imagine if people said that
to Jackson Pollock.

Well, that's probably how he got started.

Can I say
something, uh, before we continue?

Sure.

Do you think it's wise to do the work
before you actually close?

Oh, no. The bank assured me
that the house is mine.

Oh, excellent.

Well, let me then, uh, ask you this.

Uh, knowing you the way I do,

I realize every endeavor you undertake,
deep down it's about getting a man.

Because, of course, without one
you're a deep, empty, cavernous

black hole, which I respect.

But the thing is, owning your own home,
that will drive men away.

Especially the good ones, because the best
ones, we know, are providers.

It's nature's way.

The man provides
while the woman relaxes...

and welcomes his seed into her eggs
so the species survives.

But what is there, I ask,
for the man to provide if you've

already got a house of your own?

There's the Fishism query.

Richard, why can't you
take this seriously?

Well, Ally, this is a bit rash.

I mean, have you even thought
about furnishing it?

You don't just paint it
and move in, you know?

Yeah. The first thing I'm gonna get
is a coatrack.

-A coatrack. Before a satellite dish?
-Yeah.

Something to, you know, hang my coat on,

so when I walk in, hang up my coat,
I know I'm home.

Oh. Well--

Won't this place
look beautiful with a coatrack?

That'll be perfect.

Perfect. That's all it needs. Yeah.

And how would you describe your feelings
for your wife right now?

I still love her.

More than life.

And yet by buying her all of these things,

you put her in severe financial hardship.

It was never my intent.

I just--

To see her smile...

when she would open a box
to see a diamond bracelet--

♪ You are ♪

♪ So ♪

♪ Beautiful ♪

♪ To me ♪♪

Um--Uh, uh, Michael?

-Are you with me?
-Yeah.

Or, uh, the look in her eye
when she would smell gardenias.

I just--I wanted to
keep giving her things.

I guess I couldn't stop.

Well, can you help?

Yes, he's compulsive. It's a classic case.

Can you perhaps testify
that his actions were involuntary?

Not "insanity" involuntary,
but I can say he lacks the specific

intent to commit a crime.

Ah. Well, that's perfect.

Well, we have some time.
Do you want to see the house?

Hmm?

Isn't it fabulous?

Oh, it is! It's you, Allyson.

It's beautiful. But neglected.

-It's sad, but--
-Don't start psychoanalyzing it.

-Just look at it for what it is.
-All right. It's a dump.

(stammering) It is not. It-It's--

Well, you know
that Robert Kennedy once said,

"Some people look at things
the way they are, and say 'Why.'

I see things the way they never were,
and I say 'Why not.'"

Understood. But he would have hated
this place. It's a dump. Why'd you buy it?

The problem with you is, you're a man.

All you see is peeling paint and cracked
floors and fights with contractors and--

-What do you see?
-Oh, uh--

I see beauty.

I see in front of me beauty
in its raw, naked form,

and I want to make mad love to it.

I see a carpenter.

What?

(gasps) Oh.

Oh, my. Uh, hi. Uh--(chuckles)

I--Wh-Where did you come from?

-Real, right?
-Real.

The bank sent me.

There's an electrical problem.

They want me
to bring the place up to code.

I guess I'll be working in your basement.

Oh. (chuckles) Oh. O-O-Okay.

Um, you know, I, uh--I was
talking about the house.

I want to make love to the house.

-You know, I'm a-a--a--
-An edifice-sexual.

Trying to help. Trust your therapist.

I'll just be a day or two.

Great.

(elevator bell dings)

-Hey, Jen.
-Glenn. Hi.

-Whoa, whoa. What's wrong?
-Nothin'.

-Why is your face all red?
-Is it red?

Really red. The only time I've seen it
that red is when you have a--

I gotta get to work.

You went back.

-Excuse me?
-To the chair. You went back.

Well, I-- My-My neck was--

Be very careful, Jenny.

I've seen that chair ruin relationships.

What? Don't be ridiculous.

Listen. I once got lower back problems.

I thought from stress,
because I wasn't with anybody.

Then I figured out I got back problems
because I wasn't with anybody.

Be very careful.

There's no question in my mind.

Mr. Walker suffers from
an impulse control disorder.

And what exactly does that mean?

Well, in simple terms,
he feels a need to give.

He predicates his love
on his capacity to give.

And he's become obsessed
with making his wife happy.

Well, what, uh, causes that, Dr. Milter?

Well, he's addicted to the rush he gets
when he sees her gratitude, her happiness.

-Addicted to her happiness.
-Yes.

And he feeds the addiction by acting in
ways he knows to be harmful.

And shopping? (laughs) Classic.

Hmm. Wh-Wh-Wh-- What about shopping?

Well, many people buy, buy, buy to escape.

I had one patient who bought a house, so
much did she hate her own life.

-She was--
-(clears throat)

Not all house buying
is, uh, is bad, of course.

Could we talk specifically
about Mr. Walker?

-Do you think we could do that?
-(clears throat) Gladly.

Mr. Walker, likely feeling inadequacies
with himself or his relationship,

would buy, buy, buy
for Mrs. Walker because--

Well, to see her smile, he could better
convince himself that he was pleasing her,

that she loved him.

This is very typical
on more minimal levels.

But in this case,
it just got out of control.

(squeaking)

Ow. Uh, excuse me. Excuse me. Ally?

I think you're cutting
into the wood there.

Oh.

You know, a lot of people
buy houses, Richard.

It's not just
because it's a fix for unhappiness.

It's because they want a house.

Preaching to the choir, Ally.
I believe in houses.

Oh. Well, thank you.

I mean, imagine the world if people didn't
have houses, if they didn't have homes.

Where would they put their stuff?

Is that what a house is to you, Richard?
Somewhere to put your stuff?

Damn right. It's American, too.

You get a house, makes you work harder
to get more money...

so you can afford,
more stuff-- better stuff.

Uh, expensive stuff.

Rich fabric dripping from curtain rods,
beautiful countertops.

It's life, Ally. That's why
I'm proud of you here.

Look around.

You're officially a "have" person.

(chuckles) Life is full.

I am not a "have" person, Richard.

-And I will never be a "have" person.
-Yeah? Well, all right.

-(knocks)
-Excuse me.

Ally, uh, it's gonna take
a little longer than I thought.

I could come back later, if that's okay.

Okay.

Thanks.

Did he come with the house?
Because if he did--

Oh, Richard!

It's a bargain.

-Wh-What's goin' on, Jen?
-What do you mean?

Are you-- (sighs)

-Are you having an affair?
-What? Me?

Glenn, God! No.

I don't know how to
exactly say this, but, um,

your face gets red when you have an org--

I'm not one to get suspicious,
but somethin' is goin' on.

Okay.

Um...

I'm not having an affair, but...

this chiropractor, he has a chair that...

vibrates and for whatever reason...

it makes me have, um--

-A chair?
-(clears throat)

I never revealed any privileged informa--

You were testifying about me.

-I didn't say your name.
-So what?

You're talking about a client
buying a house as a fix for her

unhappiness, which I'm not.

See? I wasn't talking about you then.

-And why do you think I'm unhappy?
-You whine.

I can't buy a house just
because I want to buy a house?

It has to be symptomatic of some
underlying emotional problem?

Well, don't you think
you were a tad arbitrary?

If the wind hadn't been blowing,
you'd still be a renter.

That's another thing about men.
They can't be romantic about the

wind unless they're breaking it.

Vulgarity. You chose that rat hole
because it was in ruins.

A project you could rebuild
as you remake yourself.

-Allyson, give me your hand.
-Oh, just choose a finger.

A gust blew off your hat. It landed in
front of a house. You purchased the house.

This is not the way grown-ups
conduct their lives.

-I never ever wanted to be a grown-up.
-Clearly.

And yet you committed
the single most symbolic act of being

a grown-up, next to marriage.

You bought a house.

You are clinically messed up, Allyson.

-(grunts)
-Hi.

-The house works, right?
-Depends on the purpose, I guess.

Oh.

Oh, now don't you start. Okay, please?

The house works.

Your plumbing's old.

I beg your pardon?

It's gonna need some work.

Well, are-are-are you a plumber?

I do a little bit of everything.

I bought a house a couple of years ago.

Tore down every part, rebuilt
it, and then I sold the place.

Why?

I don't know. I guess it really didn't
represent who I was.

Which is?

Work in progress.

Hmm.

Yeah, my therapist thinks that I see
myself in-in this house.

You know, a total fixer-upper.

But not a tear-down.

No, no, not a tear-down.

Well, the electricity's good.

(grunts)

I don't deny that he's ill or something.

Then why prosecute?

Ms. McBeal, he may be compulsive,
but he did steal.

He took my money.

To buy things for you.

You do know that
he's still in love with you.

Yes.

When you speak, he hears you sing.

Like I said, I know he's got some deficit.

But he also has the ability to control it,
and he won't.

Well, my doctor says that
he may not have that control.

-t's out of my hands anyway.

The district attorney
is convinced of a crime.

He's gonna keep prosecuting
with my blessing or not.

Can I ask you, um--

(clears throat)

Do you, uh, still love your husband?

No.

I did once, yes.

And it had nothing to do with the gifts.

Do I now?

(motor whirring)

(motors buzzing, loud)

-Richard, you're pressing too hard.
-What?

You're pressing too hard!

Will you stop criticizing me
at every turn?

-I am not criticizing you.
-Yes, you are!

-(motors stop)
-Wait--

Yes, you are! "Too much paint.
Not enough. Get it even."

Now I'm pressing too hard with the sander.

If I wanted to be micromanaged,
I'd ask to have sex with you.

Richard, I am trying to get it right.
I am going to be living here.

This is my home.

-What?
-Oh, wow. Richard!

Richard, it's hitting me.

This is my home.

Oh, do you have buyer's remorse?
I mean, any?

No.

Ally, no matter how low
I set the bar of common sense,

you amaze me in your ability
to slither under it.

Thank you.

Why did you buy this house?

I mean, really.

Well, you know,
my therapist thinks that I...

see this house as something
that needs to be worked on forever

and will never be fixed,

because that's the way I see myself.

Do you think that's true?

(mumbling)

You know, I mainly bought this house
because it's beautiful,

because it's a great project, and it's
something I can commit to.

Yeah.

And I also, I admit, find some joy...

in the fact that I was able to buy it,

you know, with money I made,

that I earned.

Hmm.

I didn't need a husband to
take that emotional step.

And I didn't need his income to qualify
for a bank loan. I did it. All me.

And I do get some pleasure from that.

And nobody is gonna be able
to take that joy away from me.

Nobody can.

Or should.

(chuckles)

(chuckles)

A work crew?

This house is obviously
important to her, I think--

Look, last week she was
hallucinating a boy with skates.

Now she buys a house.

How long will this firm be held hostage
by that woman's insanity?

(coughs) Bitch.

Yeah. You know what, Nelle?

She may very well be in crisis, but people
in this firm, we rally around one another.

The appliances will arrive
tomorrow afternoon.

If we finish painting,
they can be installed.

Is there a reason why
we can't hire professionals?

The reason?

She wants this to be a labor of love.

Ugh. Make me vomit my intestines.

(coughs) Witch!

Yeah. We're gonna do it.
Tonight, we're going shopping.

-Shopping?
-For what?

A coatrack. For some reason,
uh, home is a--a--a coatrack.

Well--Yeah.

-Victor. Hey.
-Good news, bad news.

Oh, no.

All right, I'll take the bad news first.

Your plumbing's shot.

Ugh. Good news?

I'm not speaking as your gynecologist.

Heh-heh. Plumbing humor.

Heh-heh.

Um, well, how bad is it?

Pipes are corroded. Eventually,
they're all gonna have to be replaced.

-(groans) Well, can you do it?
-I can.

But technically,
the house passes inspection.

Which means the bank's
not gonna pay for it.

I have to hire you?

You have to hire me.

Well, are you married? Um, uh, bonded?

I'm bonded.

Okay. Okay, you're hired, Victor.

Great.

Great.

-You're forbidding me to see a chair?
-Yes.

-Do you know how ridiculous that is?
-It's not ridiculous.

You go to it for sexual gratification.
That--

You have a problem.

-I have a problem?
-Yes! You're jealous of a chair!

No! I'm upset that
you've become a chair slut.

(gasping, laughing)

-All right, get out.
-You'd better not go back there, Jen.

I will see what furniture
I want, when I want!

I catch you with so much as an ottoman,
we're done. Simple as that.

You are a dolt.

ALLY: Yes, he has a problem.

But is he a criminal? Now, that is the
question that you have to ask yourself.

Is Michael Walker a criminal?

(Together) No!

-Ah!
-Objection.

Members of the jury, do not
talk back to the attorneys.

Well, you heard expert testimony.

He suffers from
an impulse control disorder.

He did what he did
to find affirmation of a love.

All he could think about
was short-term happiness.

Her happiness.

So he gave her things.

And like Mrs. Walker said,
what woman doesn't like to

get things from her husband?

Hmm?

You know, couples go forward,
you--you buy a house...

and you accumulate stuff.

And the husband, well, his role is to be
the main accumulator, right?

Well, he, uh--

he lost his way.

And he went, uh, a little too far.

So you can say that he should
pay restitution, and you can

even say that he was wrong.

But we can't really say...

(whispering) that he's a criminal, can we?

(whispering) No.

And the only reason that we are here today
is because the gifts,

they stopped coming.

We are here because he falsified bank
documents, because he bankrupted her.

This man knew what he was doing.

Is it better that he acted out
of love than hatred? Yes.

Let the cockles of our heart be warmed.

But he, nevertheless, committed
knowing violations of the law.

And that is how you define a criminal.
Not "Is he a nice person?"

No doubt he is.

The question-- the only question--
Did he break the law?

The answer to that is yes.

(exhales, clears throat)

-Cheating is cheating.
-You can't cheat with furniture.

Not true.

Growing up, I
loved Bedknobs and Broomsticks.

The movie.

-Let's just paint.
-Jenny, you're in a relationship.

Oh, come on! That's silly,
even for a little frat boy.

Why am I even talking to you?
Because Nelle's gonna finish

every last one of my sentences.

-(all arguing)
-Wh-Wh-What's going on?

Oh, um, all the women are running to the
chiropractor for sexual gratification,

and Glenn's not happy.

Why are all the men so threatened?
It's a chair.

-What, you're havin' sex with a chair?
-Never mind!

Yeah. And Corretta here is
a season ticket holder, right?

Bite me.

Jenny, why don't you
take that chair to dinner?

Great idea, Glenn.

Maybe I can eat some lobster
while I'm sitting in it.

Can I come?

-Every time.
-(laughs)

Hold on. Women shouldn't
enjoy sex, period.

If God wanted that,
he'd have given them penises.

Just listen to the men.

The idea that we could perhaps
satisfy ourselves without you,

the idea that Ally
would buy a house solo--

It's all just a little too
threatening, isn't it?

It isn't that, Nelle.

It is that, Glenn. Men need to be
the givers in every little way.

I mean,
our independence emasculates you.

Ally's case? Her client can't live without
being able to give to a woman.

What a pathetic gender you are.

Nelle, I have no doubt that emotionally
you and the chair would be a good match.

You're afraid that that chair is better
than you, aren't you?

I'm afraid? How would you ever know?
Because you're never gonna get that!

-(arguing continues)
-Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey! Hey!

Come on, now! We got a lot to do here
if we're gonna surprise Ally.

Come on, team. Uh, brushes up.

(stammering)

Ally thinks, metaphorically,
that this house is her.

So let's slop some paint on.

-I got a little slop for--
-Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah!

-Mr. Foreman, have you reached a verdict?
-We have, Your Honor.

What say you?

"In the matter of Commonwealth
versus Michael Walker,

on the charges of larceny
by false pretenses,

we find the defendant,
Michael Walker, not guilty."

-(spectators murmuring)
-JUDGE WALSH: This matter is adjourned.

We thank the jury for its services.
The defendant is free to go.

Thank you so much, Ms. McBeal.

Michael, I think you deserved to lose.

And, uh, you know, you probably got off
because you have a big heart.

But, you know, don't go celebrate
by buying her a gift.

-I know.
-Okay. (chuckles)

Melissa, I got a new job.

Now, if I don't buy things--

-It's too late, Michael.
-If I promise to get some help--

I made myself clear.

♪ Don't you come home no more, no more ♪

♪ Don't you come home no more ♪♪

♪♪ (pop)

♪ Hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back no more, no more
no more, no more ♪

♪ Hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back no more ♪

-VONDA: ♪ What you say ♪
-I think you're overreacting.

The only question you have to ask yourself
about sex, Glenn-- is it good for you?

Listen to the man.

VONDA: ♪ Don't you treat me this way ♪

♪ 'Cause I'll be back on my feet someday ♪

♪ Don't care if you do
'cause it's understood ♪

♪ You ain't got no money
You just ain't no good ♪

♪♪ (continues)

Can you imagine a man
being jealous of a chair?

It didn't even recline.

Well, i-is it, uh, you know,
really that good?

♪♪ (continues)

-Mm-hmm.
-Yeah.

(chuckling)

Come on, if we're dancing it looks like
we're on our own tonight.

Let's go.

You guys go. I'm gonna, um--
Well, I have a date.

Really? With anybody I know?

Yeah. Me.

-You.
-Mm-hmm.

♪ Hey, hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back no more, no more
no more, no more ♪

♪ Hit the road, Jack ♪

♪ And don't you come back no more ♪

♪ What you say ♪♪

(wind whistling)

♪ How many roads ♪

♪ Must a man walk down ♪

♪ Before you call him ♪

♪ A man ♪

♪ Yes, and how many seas ♪

♪ Must a white dove sail ♪

♪ Before she sleeps ♪

♪ In the sand ♪

♪ Yes, and how many times ♪

♪ Must a cannonball fly ♪

♪ Before they're forever banned ♪

♪ The answer, my friend ♪

♪ Is blowin' in the wind ♪

♪ The answer is blowin' in the wind ♪

♪ How many times ♪

♪ Must a man look up ♪

♪ Before he can see ♪

♪ The sky ♪

♪ Yes, and how many ears ♪

♪ Must one man have ♪

♪ Before he can hear ♪

♪ People cry ♪

♪ And how many deaths ♪

♪ Will it take till he knows ♪

♪ That too many people have died ♪

♪ The answer, my friend ♪

♪ Is blowin' in the wind ♪

♪ The answer is blowin' ♪

♪ In the wind ♪♪

WOMAN: You stinker!