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1
00:00:30,900 --> 00:00:34,860
Ugh, why do we always
get cleanup duty
2
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:36,340
when they've tortured a Reman?
3
00:00:36,340 --> 00:00:38,821
They leave behind
the biggest mess.
4
00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:41,998
Sub-Commander Vrek
takes pleasure in our misery.
5
00:00:41,998 --> 00:00:44,305
Hopefully, he doesn't get
too comfortable,
6
00:00:44,305 --> 00:00:47,003
for soon my plans
will come to fruition
7
00:00:47,003 --> 00:00:49,571
and his life will be disrupted.
8
00:00:49,571 --> 00:00:52,791
You are betraying
Sub-Commander Vrek?
9
00:00:52,791 --> 00:00:54,315
That is a pity
10
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:57,405
because I am already
betraying him
11
00:00:57,405 --> 00:01:01,104
and my plans
will come to fruition first.
12
00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:03,846
Oh, please,
don't make me scoff.
13
00:01:03,846 --> 00:01:05,674
Your plans
are barely even schemes.
14
00:01:05,674 --> 00:01:08,720
You wouldn't know a scheme
from a conspiracy.
15
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:10,505
Ooh, an alert.
16
00:01:10,505 --> 00:01:12,637
Our sinister plans
will have to wait.
17
00:01:14,204 --> 00:01:17,164
Ugh, Reman juice
never comes out.
18
00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:18,295
Status report.
19
00:01:18,295 --> 00:01:20,341
An unknown ship seems to have
20
00:01:20,341 --> 00:01:21,864
intentionally blocked our path.
21
00:01:21,864 --> 00:01:23,431
How did they detect us?
22
00:01:23,431 --> 00:01:27,391
Assassination plots against me
are one thing, but sabotage?
23
00:01:27,391 --> 00:01:29,698
Is this your doing, Malok?
24
00:01:29,698 --> 00:01:31,265
How dare you.
25
00:01:31,265 --> 00:01:34,006
Of course I crave your demise,
but not like...
26
00:01:34,006 --> 00:01:36,313
Silence. I've been stabbing
commanders in the back
27
00:01:36,313 --> 00:01:39,186
since before your mother
killed her first traitor.
28
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:40,361
Wipe this crumb
29
00:01:40,361 --> 00:01:41,840
from our path so I can focus
30
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:43,538
on being suspicious.
31
00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:46,410
Commander, our systems--
they're not responding!
32
00:01:46,410 --> 00:01:48,369
That's impossible.
Fire disruptors!
33
00:01:48,369 --> 00:01:50,936
No, it's true.
Our shields are deactivating.
34
00:01:50,936 --> 00:01:52,155
Go to cloak!
35
00:03:19,286 --> 00:03:20,983
Let me die!
36
00:03:20,983 --> 00:03:24,465
No, no, no. Stay with me, Shaxs.
You're gonna get through this.
37
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:26,162
We're exploring
the galactic frontier,
38
00:03:26,162 --> 00:03:27,772
we need to stay flexible.
39
00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:30,297
Wow, you're really tight today.
40
00:03:30,297 --> 00:03:31,994
What's got you so tense, amigo?
41
00:03:31,994 --> 00:03:34,823
One minute,
T'Ana's all over me,
42
00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:36,781
the next, she says
I'm too clingy
43
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:38,392
and she won't come out
from under the bed.
44
00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:40,829
Have you tried scratching your
fingers on the covers and going
45
00:03:40,829 --> 00:03:42,309
-"pss-pss-pss-pss"?
- Of course I have!
46
00:03:42,309 --> 00:03:45,050
How's it going
with the new lieutenants?
47
00:03:45,050 --> 00:03:47,183
Good, except for Mariner.
48
00:03:47,183 --> 00:03:49,316
- Mm-hmm.
- I've got her
right where I want her.
49
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:51,274
She thinks she knows the score,
but trust me,
50
00:03:51,274 --> 00:03:53,363
she won't be my problem
for long.
51
00:03:55,452 --> 00:03:58,107
- Hot fudge sundaes after this?
- Oh, yeah.
52
00:03:58,107 --> 00:04:00,022
Cheat day.
53
00:04:03,330 --> 00:04:06,115
We put a lot of light-years
on these orange slabs.
54
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:08,509
I promised myself
I wouldn't get emotional.
55
00:04:08,509 --> 00:04:09,945
Aw, how could you not?
56
00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:11,599
We spent so much time
hanging out,
57
00:04:11,599 --> 00:04:14,079
staying up late
ranking captains by cuteness,
58
00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:16,517
swapping bodies
because of those cosmic rays.
59
00:04:16,517 --> 00:04:18,823
We learned too much
about each other that day.
60
00:04:18,823 --> 00:04:21,130
I'm even gonna miss the dent
I made from all the times
61
00:04:21,130 --> 00:04:23,524
I slammed my head on the ceiling
during a red alert.
62
00:04:23,524 --> 00:04:25,308
Goodbye, Denty.
63
00:04:25,308 --> 00:04:26,744
You okay, Mariner?
Need any help packing?
64
00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:28,529
No thanks.
65
00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:29,965
Ransom's just gonna knock me
back down to ensign anyway.
66
00:04:29,965 --> 00:04:31,619
He promoted you last week.
67
00:04:31,619 --> 00:04:33,708
I just heard him bragging to
Shaxs that he's messing with me.
68
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:35,449
- What? Why?
- I mean, who knows. His brain
69
00:04:35,449 --> 00:04:37,581
is, like, the only part
of his body he doesn't work out.
70
00:04:37,581 --> 00:04:39,888
But didn't he say
he was going to support you?
71
00:04:39,888 --> 00:04:42,499
No, they always do, and then
the second I speak my mind? Bam.
72
00:04:42,499 --> 00:04:44,109
Right back to being an ensign.
73
00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:46,155
They always think it's,
like, a learning experience.
74
00:04:46,155 --> 00:04:47,852
Wait, is he dumb
or playing mind games?
75
00:04:47,852 --> 00:04:49,724
Well, who cares.
I'm not falling for it.
76
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:52,553
Ransom's just waiting
for me to mess up, huh? Fine.
77
00:04:52,553 --> 00:04:54,555
I'm gonna become
an insubordination supernova
78
00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:55,991
and control my own fate.
79
00:04:55,991 --> 00:04:58,559
But you're not actually gonna
blow anything up, right?
80
00:04:58,559 --> 00:05:00,735
No. I'm gonna talk back,
break the rules,
81
00:05:00,735 --> 00:05:02,824
crack some inappropriate jokes
in front of an ambassador.
82
00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:06,523
When I get demoted,
it'll be because I earned it.
83
00:05:06,523 --> 00:05:08,003
Well, that should prove
to be a disaster.
84
00:05:08,003 --> 00:05:09,091
Should we go check out
our rooms?
85
00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:11,354
Yeah, come on Rutherfor...
Oh, right.
86
00:05:11,354 --> 00:05:12,573
I'm sorry.
87
00:05:12,573 --> 00:05:15,097
You guys go ahead.
I'm still a lowly ensign.
88
00:05:15,097 --> 00:05:17,404
Ugh, I totally forgot
you didn't get promoted with us.
89
00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,493
You exude lieutenant
junior grade energy.
90
00:05:19,493 --> 00:05:21,146
I don't know
if I'm going to like
91
00:05:21,146 --> 00:05:23,235
not bunking five feet away from
you. I mean, how will I sleep
92
00:05:23,235 --> 00:05:25,412
without someone muttering
about the warp threshold?
93
00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:26,935
Aw, Tendi, don't worry,
94
00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:28,893
I'll just get a promotion today
so I can join you guys.
95
00:05:28,893 --> 00:05:31,548
I... don't know
if it's that easy.
96
00:05:31,548 --> 00:05:33,507
I just have to do some
amazing engineering.
97
00:05:33,507 --> 00:05:35,073
How hard could it be?
98
00:05:35,073 --> 00:05:37,380
Oof. What I would give
for his confidence.
99
00:05:37,380 --> 00:05:39,817
Huh. Maybe you'd have it if you
didn't hit your head so much.
100
00:05:39,817 --> 00:05:42,385
Don't say stuff
like that in front of Denty.
101
00:05:52,221 --> 00:05:53,962
What up, nerds?
102
00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:54,963
Who's ready to get mission-y?
103
00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:56,791
Almost on time, Mariner.
Well done.
104
00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:58,836
This is Ensign Gary's
first away mission,
105
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:01,404
so I'd like you to take him
under your wing. You know,
106
00:06:01,404 --> 00:06:03,058
once you change
into your uniform.
107
00:06:03,058 --> 00:06:05,452
No, you know, I thought
I'd keep it "caszh" today.
108
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:08,063
Simple mission, simple outfit.
This guy gets it.
109
00:06:08,063 --> 00:06:10,935
Okay. Speaking of the mission,
110
00:06:10,935 --> 00:06:13,503
please fill Ensign Gary in
on the particulars.
111
00:06:13,503 --> 00:06:15,331
Can do, hoss. Boom.
112
00:06:15,331 --> 00:06:17,638
Today we're dealing
with a classic "menage."
113
00:06:17,638 --> 00:06:19,466
-"Menage"?
- A menagerie.
114
00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,729
Well, it's basically
just a big-ass alien zoo
115
00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,513
full of aliens
run by another alien.
116
00:06:23,513 --> 00:06:25,123
This one scooped up a couple
of humans...
117
00:06:25,123 --> 00:06:26,951
"by accident," so
118
00:06:26,951 --> 00:06:28,344
we got to bust them
the [bleep] out.
119
00:06:28,344 --> 00:06:30,564
Oh, I-I didn't know
it would be dangerous.
120
00:06:30,564 --> 00:06:34,306
It's not. And this place
has a strict no-weapons policy.
121
00:06:34,306 --> 00:06:36,221
Eh, menageries
are always capturing humans
122
00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:38,049
then turning them back over
to Starfleet.
123
00:06:38,049 --> 00:06:41,052
We'll be in and out, no biggie.
Right, Jack?
124
00:06:41,052 --> 00:06:42,663
Let's just get in the shuttle.
125
00:06:42,663 --> 00:06:44,491
Wait, when
you're a lieutenant JG
126
00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:46,188
you can call him Jack?
127
00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:47,494
I always call him Jack
because, you know,
128
00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:48,930
socially, we're equals.
129
00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:50,366
Right, Jack?
130
00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:51,846
We're leaving now.
131
00:06:51,846 --> 00:06:53,674
Oh, boy,
132
00:06:53,674 --> 00:06:55,676
Mirror Universe Archer,
you're gonna love our new room.
133
00:06:55,676 --> 00:06:57,678
Aah...
134
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:01,986
The nacelle is right there?
135
00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:03,684
Okay,
136
00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:05,555
not the best view,
137
00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:07,905
but I'm sure
I'll get used to it.
138
00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:09,994
Aah! Lil' Archer!
Ah...
139
00:07:13,128 --> 00:07:14,346
Take her in nice and easy.
140
00:07:14,346 --> 00:07:18,002
Aye aye, sir.
Nice and easy.
141
00:07:19,613 --> 00:07:21,266
- What are you doing?!
- Slow down, slow down,
142
00:07:21,266 --> 00:07:22,137
slow down!
143
00:07:25,836 --> 00:07:27,359
I don't want to die!
144
00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:34,366
- Was that nice and easy enough?
- That...
145
00:07:34,366 --> 00:07:37,239
was some great piloting.
Let's get to work.
146
00:07:37,239 --> 00:07:40,982
I need to replicate
some new pants.
147
00:07:42,636 --> 00:07:44,768
Oh-ho, greetings.
148
00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:46,291
Narj is happy to welcome you
149
00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:49,730
to Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium,
150
00:07:49,730 --> 00:07:51,732
recently voted one
of the top thousand menageries
151
00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:52,950
in the quadrant.
152
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:54,952
Narj will be sad
to lose the humans.
153
00:07:54,952 --> 00:07:56,693
They're incredibly popular.
154
00:07:56,693 --> 00:07:58,521
How did they even get locked up
here in the first place?
155
00:07:58,521 --> 00:08:00,697
Accidentally scooped up
with a shipment of bipedals.
156
00:08:02,003 --> 00:08:04,788
Narj has to admit that Narj
does have a hard time
157
00:08:04,788 --> 00:08:06,355
telling non-botanical
creatures apart.
158
00:08:06,355 --> 00:08:07,791
Happens all the time.
159
00:08:07,791 --> 00:08:09,880
Humans are always
getting stuck in menageries.
160
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,969
But don't worry,
I brought my best team with me.
161
00:08:11,969 --> 00:08:14,929
We'll be out of your leaves
lickity split.
162
00:08:14,929 --> 00:08:17,235
His best team? What the hell
is that supposed to mean?
163
00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:19,063
I guess the commander likes us.
164
00:08:19,063 --> 00:08:21,457
What? No, he doesn't.
He's messing with me.
165
00:08:21,457 --> 00:08:22,937
He's setting me up
for humiliation
166
00:08:22,937 --> 00:08:24,025
when he comes down on me later.
167
00:08:24,025 --> 00:08:26,680
Are you guys
breaking up or something?
168
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:28,812
Yeah, we are, as coworkers.
169
00:08:28,812 --> 00:08:30,422
And we're gonna
force it right now.
170
00:08:30,422 --> 00:08:31,772
I'm having a little trouble
171
00:08:31,772 --> 00:08:32,816
decoding the dynamic here,
172
00:08:32,816 --> 00:08:35,297
but I'd really like
to be left out of it.
173
00:08:39,606 --> 00:08:40,824
Hey, Narj.
174
00:08:40,824 --> 00:08:42,609
What got you
in the prison business, huh?
175
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,611
Just a cruel weirdo
who loves locking people up?
176
00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:47,048
A prison is a place
for criminals.
177
00:08:47,048 --> 00:08:50,268
- I've given these
sweet creatures a safe home.
- What about this little guy?
178
00:08:50,268 --> 00:08:52,575
He doesn't deserve to be
in your [bleep]-up hobby.
179
00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,621
Hobby? The Moopsy
is Narj's favorite.
180
00:08:54,621 --> 00:08:56,013
Moopsy.
181
00:08:56,013 --> 00:08:57,449
Do you imprison
everything you like?
182
00:08:57,449 --> 00:08:59,713
- Of course.
- Mariner,
183
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:01,845
it's not our place
to judge the menagerie.
184
00:09:01,845 --> 00:09:03,673
We're just here
to collect the humans.
185
00:09:03,673 --> 00:09:05,066
No, you're here
to collect humans.
186
00:09:05,066 --> 00:09:07,111
I'm here to be human,
187
00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:09,026
which means calling bull
when I see it.
188
00:09:09,026 --> 00:09:10,593
Narj does not understand.
189
00:09:10,593 --> 00:09:12,726
Narj abides by Federation law.
190
00:09:12,726 --> 00:09:15,032
Don't worry about it.
She's a firebrand,
191
00:09:15,032 --> 00:09:16,947
but I trust her with my life.
192
00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:18,688
No, you're not getting
in my head.
193
00:09:18,688 --> 00:09:20,560
Moopsy.
194
00:09:27,871 --> 00:09:29,656
And I can't wait until we're
the same rank again because then
195
00:09:29,656 --> 00:09:31,875
we can get back to praising
people behind their backs.
196
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:34,878
I think Boimler's
gonna be a great lieutenant.
197
00:09:34,878 --> 00:09:36,663
I don't want you to pressure
yourself to get a promotion
198
00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:39,013
just so we can hang out.
It can take years.
199
00:09:39,013 --> 00:09:41,929
Don't worry, I've been working
on something pretty impressive.
200
00:09:41,929 --> 00:09:43,408
Billups is gonna love it.
201
00:09:43,408 --> 00:09:45,889
Commander Billups.
Can I run something by you, sir?
202
00:09:45,889 --> 00:09:47,761
Of course, Mr. Rutherford.
What's up?
203
00:09:47,761 --> 00:09:49,197
For the past year,
I've been working
204
00:09:49,197 --> 00:09:50,938
to decrease vibration
in the warp manifold
205
00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:53,201
by a factor of .05.
206
00:09:53,201 --> 00:09:55,116
...05? That can't be right.
207
00:09:55,116 --> 00:09:57,640
Well, it wasn't easy, but with
a little ingenuity...
208
00:09:57,640 --> 00:09:58,946
No, I mean it can't be right
209
00:09:58,946 --> 00:10:00,904
because, a few minutes ago,
Ensign Livik
210
00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:03,646
decreased the vibration
by a factor of .06.
211
00:10:03,646 --> 00:10:05,082
Ensign Livik? Who's that?
212
00:10:05,082 --> 00:10:06,344
The new guy.
213
00:10:06,344 --> 00:10:09,521
Livik! Livik!
214
00:10:09,521 --> 00:10:10,697
Livik.
215
00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:19,836
Ha! Stupid bussard light.
216
00:10:19,836 --> 00:10:21,316
You ain't so tough now.
217
00:10:21,316 --> 00:10:22,926
I'll tell you,
if Livik keeps this up,
218
00:10:22,926 --> 00:10:24,232
he'll have a promotion
in no time.
219
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:25,537
Let's fire up
his protocol right now.
220
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:27,844
I want to see
that .06 in action.
221
00:10:31,326 --> 00:10:32,806
Help.
222
00:10:36,984 --> 00:10:38,115
And right this way.
223
00:10:38,115 --> 00:10:40,030
Hello, humans.
224
00:10:40,030 --> 00:10:42,554
Narj hopes you have enjoyed
your stay in the "menage."
225
00:10:42,554 --> 00:10:45,775
Now, it is time for you to
return to your natural habitat.
226
00:10:45,775 --> 00:10:47,734
I know you're taking a hit
losing these guys.
227
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:49,126
We appreciate
the positive attitude.
228
00:10:49,126 --> 00:10:51,781
Not to worry.
My real moneymakers
229
00:10:51,781 --> 00:10:53,914
are the Pyrithian
Swamp Gobblers over there.
230
00:10:57,526 --> 00:10:58,875
Moopsy.
231
00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:00,224
Hm?
232
00:11:00,224 --> 00:11:01,965
Oh, [bleep]!
The Moopsy is free!
233
00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,967
Oh, no, your cuddliest
prisoner is loose.
234
00:11:03,967 --> 00:11:05,360
Whatever shall we do?
235
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:06,970
You don't understand.
236
00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:08,580
Everything here
is incredibly dangerous.
237
00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:09,930
Moopsy.
238
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:11,540
Can't be worse
than the Swamp Gobblers.
239
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:14,456
Of course it's worse!
They only gobble you.
240
00:11:14,456 --> 00:11:16,197
The Moopsy drinks your bones!
241
00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:17,938
How does something drink bones?
242
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:22,899
Holy [bleep]!
243
00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:24,596
Run! Run for your lives!
244
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:34,302
Moopsy.
245
00:11:34,302 --> 00:11:36,347
Come on, come on, come on,
show me that sweet
246
00:11:36,347 --> 00:11:37,914
incremental improvement.
247
00:11:37,914 --> 00:11:39,220
Yes!
248
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:41,265
Commander Billups?
You might want to sit down.
249
00:11:41,265 --> 00:11:43,006
I increased the power output
250
00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:45,661
of the Tucker Tubes
by seven pico-cochrans.
251
00:11:45,661 --> 00:11:47,271
That's great, Rutherford.
252
00:11:47,271 --> 00:11:49,273
I just hope those adjustments
can apply to the Billups Tubes.
253
00:11:49,273 --> 00:11:50,361
The what now?
254
00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,320
Ensign Livik figured out
how to add
255
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:54,975
a third tube without triggering
a Heisenberg collapse.
256
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:56,193
A third tube?
257
00:11:56,193 --> 00:11:58,979
Yeah, and he named it
the Billups Tubes.
258
00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:00,545
Classic Livik.
259
00:12:00,545 --> 00:12:01,982
I-I don't even know
what we use these for,
260
00:12:01,982 --> 00:12:02,939
but I love them.
261
00:12:02,939 --> 00:12:04,811
- GROUP [chanting]: Livik! Livik!
- Livik.
262
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:09,598
Wow, so close to the holodecks.
This is gonna be awesome.
263
00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:12,862
That's more like it.
264
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:14,951
Thanks for helping me
get my new quarters, sir.
265
00:12:14,951 --> 00:12:16,605
Happy to help, baby bear.
266
00:12:16,605 --> 00:12:19,129
Well, have fun getting
settled in. I've got to run.
267
00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:21,697
Dr. T'Ana and I have a date
on the holodeck.
268
00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:23,133
Have fun.
269
00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:25,483
You ready to get disgusting?
270
00:12:25,483 --> 00:12:28,182
Has that ever
stopped you before?
271
00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:33,491
T'ANA:
Computer, activate
T'Ana program 35.
272
00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:36,973
Uh, how thin are these walls?
273
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:38,192
With me, my merry men.
274
00:12:38,192 --> 00:12:39,933
We must make haste to the castle
275
00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:41,717
to save the Maid Marion.
276
00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:43,458
Ow! What are you doing?
277
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:46,069
T'ANA:
Shut your [bleep] face.
I'm Robin Hood now.
278
00:12:46,069 --> 00:12:48,593
Toodley doo!
Shaxs, hold him down.
279
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:50,378
You've already hurt him
pretty bad.
280
00:12:50,378 --> 00:12:52,815
T'ANA: Kick his head!
Help! A cat
281
00:12:52,815 --> 00:12:56,253
has stolen my hat and arrows.
282
00:12:56,253 --> 00:12:58,603
Can't we just do the program
as intended for once?
283
00:12:58,603 --> 00:13:00,388
T'ANA:
Oh!
284
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:05,045
And now that I am president
285
00:13:05,045 --> 00:13:06,481
of all Starfleet,
286
00:13:06,481 --> 00:13:08,091
allow me to present
287
00:13:08,091 --> 00:13:10,877
my inaugural scatting.
288
00:13:10,877 --> 00:13:13,618
Why is there a room
between two holodecks?
289
00:13:13,618 --> 00:13:15,229
T'ANA: Don't make me arrow you!
290
00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:16,491
Ow! Stop that.
291
00:13:16,491 --> 00:13:18,232
T'ANA: Make me!
Ow!
292
00:13:18,232 --> 00:13:20,060
T'ANA:
I steal from the
and give to my [bleep]!
293
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:27,937
Moopsy.
294
00:13:36,728 --> 00:13:39,731
So much...
for these new pants.
295
00:13:39,731 --> 00:13:40,907
Uh, no-weapons policy
296
00:13:40,907 --> 00:13:42,952
in a death-trap zoo?
genius.
297
00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:45,999
- What's your problem?
- Do I really have to say it?
298
00:13:45,999 --> 00:13:47,696
Wait, you think
I let that thing out?
299
00:13:47,696 --> 00:13:49,393
You've been pulling
insubordinate crap all day.
300
00:13:49,393 --> 00:13:50,568
Oh, that is rich.
301
00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:51,613
You're the one who let
302
00:13:51,613 --> 00:13:53,223
a bone-eating monster
out of its cage.
303
00:13:53,223 --> 00:13:54,529
Uh, Narj will
make sure the Moopsy
304
00:13:54,529 --> 00:13:56,096
is still attacking the door.
305
00:13:56,096 --> 00:13:57,488
Yeah, I've been pushing
your buttons, because
306
00:13:57,488 --> 00:13:59,316
I knew you were looking
for a reason to demote me,
307
00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,057
and of course it's for something
I didn't even do.
308
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,580
Wait, why would I want
to demote you?
309
00:14:02,580 --> 00:14:05,714
Gee, I don't know, how about
our entire working relationship?
310
00:14:05,714 --> 00:14:07,194
What? I'm a good boss.
311
00:14:07,194 --> 00:14:09,065
You stabbed me in the foot
with a battle blade,
312
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:12,286
you-you turned into a giant head
and tried to eat me,
313
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:13,722
you tried to trick me
into messing up
314
00:14:13,722 --> 00:14:15,506
- on that space elevator...
- That was an orbital lift.
315
00:14:15,506 --> 00:14:17,813
And then, after you promised
you would believe in me,
316
00:14:17,813 --> 00:14:19,032
I heard you tell Shaxs
in the gym
317
00:14:19,032 --> 00:14:20,903
that I wasn't gonna
be your problem anymore.
318
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:23,036
W-What? The gym?
You heard that?
319
00:14:23,036 --> 00:14:24,559
Ha! You admit it.
320
00:14:24,559 --> 00:14:27,127
All I meant is that
you're not gonna be my problem
321
00:14:27,127 --> 00:14:29,390
because I'm not gonna take the
bait with your insubordination.
322
00:14:29,390 --> 00:14:31,174
Bait? What-what are you
talking about?
323
00:14:31,174 --> 00:14:32,219
Ugh, it's all in your file.
324
00:14:32,219 --> 00:14:34,003
You've been promoted
a dozen times,
325
00:14:34,003 --> 00:14:36,136
then you always get demoted
for acting out.
326
00:14:36,136 --> 00:14:38,051
- Yeah, 'cause I'm a, you know,
I'm a free spirt.
- No.
327
00:14:38,051 --> 00:14:40,401
Because you're manipulating
your commanding officers.
328
00:14:40,401 --> 00:14:42,403
I'm gonna be the first one
who doesn't fall for it.
329
00:14:42,403 --> 00:14:43,970
Trust me, it's not easy.
330
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:46,407
I do not try to get demoted.
331
00:14:46,407 --> 00:14:48,409
What have you
been doing all day?
332
00:14:48,409 --> 00:14:50,411
No. I... I was... You...
333
00:14:50,411 --> 00:14:52,369
Uh... Okay, fine,
that was just today.
334
00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:54,763
- You always do.
- No, I don't. I...
335
00:14:54,763 --> 00:14:57,113
Shut up.
336
00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:59,115
- Why would I do that?
- I don't know.
337
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:02,031
But I'm sorry to say you still
have my unwavering support,
338
00:15:02,031 --> 00:15:03,598
no matter how hard you make it.
339
00:15:05,382 --> 00:15:06,818
I didn't let the Moopsy out.
340
00:15:06,818 --> 00:15:08,559
I believe you.
341
00:15:08,559 --> 00:15:10,518
Okay. Thank you.
342
00:15:10,518 --> 00:15:12,868
I'm glad you two worked
your whole thing out,
343
00:15:12,868 --> 00:15:15,262
but can we maybe focus
on the bone-drinking monster
344
00:15:15,262 --> 00:15:17,307
this plant guy
probably set loose?
345
00:15:17,307 --> 00:15:19,527
You accuse Narj
of Moopsy freeing?
346
00:15:19,527 --> 00:15:21,268
Narj would never
do such a thing.
347
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:24,184
Not even if we got killed and
you kept your valuable humans?
348
00:15:24,184 --> 00:15:26,490
Plus, you're a tree-- you
probably don't even have bones.
349
00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:28,971
Ridiculous!
Narj is ossified. Narj...
350
00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:30,103
Hm?
351
00:15:30,103 --> 00:15:32,235
Moopsy.
352
00:15:34,411 --> 00:15:37,197
It's chugging him!
353
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,679
Wait, the door.
354
00:15:43,246 --> 00:15:45,466
Phew, no ladders.
355
00:15:45,466 --> 00:15:47,120
Now it can't get back
through those vents.
356
00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,774
Yeah. Now it's trapped in the...
357
00:15:49,774 --> 00:15:52,864
station's main control room.
358
00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:55,955
Moopsy.
359
00:16:09,185 --> 00:16:10,752
Ah, this is perfect.
360
00:16:10,752 --> 00:16:12,841
A nice, dark Jefferies Tube
361
00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:15,670
where we can't hear anyone
decapitate Peter Pan.
362
00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,889
Ah, this is much better
than the bunks.
363
00:16:17,889 --> 00:16:19,239
- Hey, Boimler.
- Aah!
364
00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:20,240
What you doing in here?
365
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:21,545
Hey, Rutherford.
366
00:16:21,545 --> 00:16:25,245
Uh, I live here now.
You doing a systems check?
367
00:16:25,245 --> 00:16:26,855
Nah, I'm trying to find a way
to diffuse heat conduction
368
00:16:26,855 --> 00:16:28,248
by a few nanojoules.
369
00:16:28,248 --> 00:16:30,380
Oh, some ensign
just came through here
370
00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:32,382
doing the exact same thing.
371
00:16:32,382 --> 00:16:34,123
Seemed like a real wunderkind.
I was impressed.
372
00:16:34,123 --> 00:16:35,516
Livik.
373
00:16:35,516 --> 00:16:38,432
Leave some minor improvements
for the rest of us, guy!
374
00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:40,042
- Dinner later?
- Sure.
375
00:16:43,698 --> 00:16:45,265
Hey, calm down.
376
00:16:45,265 --> 00:16:47,876
You calm down! If you two
hadn't been bickering,
377
00:16:47,876 --> 00:16:50,313
we wouldn't be falling
into a planet!
378
00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:51,923
Nobody's dying today
379
00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:54,274
because I'm gonna crawl through
the vents, unlock the door,
380
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:55,405
and get the Moopsy
to chase me out,
381
00:16:55,405 --> 00:16:56,711
so you two can rush in
and stabilize
382
00:16:56,711 --> 00:16:58,582
the orbit
while it drinks my bones.
383
00:16:58,582 --> 00:17:00,280
Stand down, Mariner.
384
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:01,455
Jack, we are plummeting.
385
00:17:01,455 --> 00:17:03,457
Even if this works,
we'll only stop re-entry
386
00:17:03,457 --> 00:17:05,198
by the skin of our teeth.
387
00:17:05,198 --> 00:17:07,722
Wait, that's it. Mariner,
388
00:17:07,722 --> 00:17:09,028
punch me in the face.
389
00:17:09,985 --> 00:17:11,378
That's an order, Lieutenant.
390
00:17:11,378 --> 00:17:12,944
Okay.
391
00:17:12,944 --> 00:17:15,338
Come on, as hard as you can.
392
00:17:17,297 --> 00:17:18,646
That thing wants bones?
393
00:17:18,646 --> 00:17:19,821
We'll give it bones.
394
00:17:19,821 --> 00:17:21,301
Oh, you're a genius.
395
00:17:24,739 --> 00:17:28,177
I should have been
an outpost scientist.
396
00:17:28,177 --> 00:17:30,310
Wait, Rutherford,
397
00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:31,876
you've been working yourself
to death all day.
398
00:17:31,876 --> 00:17:33,661
- You don't have to do this.
- No.
399
00:17:33,661 --> 00:17:35,315
This time I nailed it.
400
00:17:35,315 --> 00:17:37,143
I sped up the replicators
by nine whole femtoseconds.
401
00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:38,883
I'm definitely getting
a promotion now.
402
00:17:38,883 --> 00:17:41,451
You and I'll be the same rank
and stay friends forever.
403
00:17:41,451 --> 00:17:42,931
Billups. Whew.
It took an unbelievable
404
00:17:42,931 --> 00:17:44,802
amount of engineering,
but I finally
405
00:17:44,802 --> 00:17:46,717
managed...
- I'm sure whatever you did
is great, Mr. Rutherford,
406
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:49,329
- but it'll have to wait
until after the pip ceremony.
- Huh?
407
00:17:52,158 --> 00:17:53,855
Livik!
408
00:17:56,379 --> 00:17:58,381
I'm sorry, Tendi.
409
00:17:58,381 --> 00:18:00,688
I let you down.
410
00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:03,256
- Mr. Rutherford,
stand at attention.
- What?
411
00:18:03,256 --> 00:18:05,736
I am your superior, Ensign.
Do it.
412
00:18:05,736 --> 00:18:07,651
We'll be friends
no matter what our ranks are.
413
00:18:07,651 --> 00:18:09,392
We're going to spend
tons of time hanging out
414
00:18:09,392 --> 00:18:11,612
and talking about science
and telling jokes and, you know,
415
00:18:11,612 --> 00:18:13,831
do all the things we used to do.
And that's an order.
416
00:18:13,831 --> 00:18:16,443
Yes, ma'am.
417
00:18:16,443 --> 00:18:18,358
Oh, my gosh,
I just gave my first order.
418
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:20,925
- Oh.
- Man, now I wish
419
00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:23,580
I hadn't turned down
all those promotions.
420
00:18:23,580 --> 00:18:24,625
Sorry, what?
421
00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:26,061
You know,
for saving the Cerritos
422
00:18:26,061 --> 00:18:27,236
from the Pakleds
423
00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:28,890
and the Rubidoux
from the space jellyfish,
424
00:18:28,890 --> 00:18:29,934
stuff like that.
425
00:18:29,934 --> 00:18:32,023
Wait, why did you
turn them all down?
426
00:18:32,023 --> 00:18:34,635
Because I didn't
want my own room
427
00:18:34,635 --> 00:18:36,202
where I wouldn't be near you.
428
00:18:36,202 --> 00:18:39,814
Aw, Rutherford, but can't you
just go accept one right now?
429
00:18:39,814 --> 00:18:42,251
Nah, they took it really
seriously in engineering.
430
00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:44,384
- You have to earn it
with a scientific...
- Hey, Billups!
431
00:18:44,384 --> 00:18:45,428
Can Rutherford
have his promotion
432
00:18:45,428 --> 00:18:47,256
for that time
he removed the hull?
433
00:18:47,256 --> 00:18:50,694
Oh, sure. Ah, sorry, Livik,
maybe next time.
434
00:18:52,740 --> 00:18:55,438
Wait, I can just ask
for stuff I deserve?
435
00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:58,659
- I guess.
- Rutherford!
Rutherford!
436
00:18:58,659 --> 00:19:01,836
Hooray!
Thanks, everyone.
437
00:19:02,967 --> 00:19:04,447
Rutherford.
438
00:19:04,447 --> 00:19:06,406
And also Tendi.
439
00:19:11,933 --> 00:19:13,413
Moopsy.
440
00:19:23,118 --> 00:19:24,511
Moopsy.
441
00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:27,601
Got you,
you cuddly little murderer.
442
00:19:27,601 --> 00:19:30,821
We say-bih-eye
da say-sa orbih!
443
00:19:30,821 --> 00:19:32,475
What's that, Gummy?
444
00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:34,260
We stabilized
the station's orbit.
445
00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:37,567
Oh, man, victory
really is that much sweeter
446
00:19:37,567 --> 00:19:39,265
when you almost got killed.
447
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:40,614
I just wish
we could have figured out
448
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:42,703
how this little guy got out
in the first place.
449
00:19:42,703 --> 00:19:44,966
I mean, it clearly wasn't Narj,
dude was brimming with bones.
450
00:19:44,966 --> 00:19:46,402
Let's get these humans
451
00:19:46,402 --> 00:19:48,535
out of here. Starfleet security
can figure it out.
452
00:19:48,535 --> 00:19:50,798
Well, at least
it wasn't our fault.
453
00:19:50,798 --> 00:19:52,626
You know, humans
are always being blamed
454
00:19:52,626 --> 00:19:55,716
for being dangerous,
but we don't have claws or fangs
455
00:19:55,716 --> 00:19:57,021
- or...
- Hey, that umbrella
456
00:19:57,021 --> 00:19:58,632
is upside down, yeah?
457
00:20:03,854 --> 00:20:06,074
Did you [bleep] rewire
the Moopsy door?
458
00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:08,163
You could've got us all killed. Wow.
459
00:20:08,163 --> 00:20:11,340
I guess humans really are
the most dangerous game.
460
00:20:11,340 --> 00:20:13,299
Damn it.
461
00:20:15,170 --> 00:20:17,128
Lieutenant junior grade's log..
462
00:20:17,128 --> 00:20:20,001
Nope, no, too weird.
Uh, let's go with
463
00:20:20,001 --> 00:20:22,917
Mariner's log.
So, yeah, of course
464
00:20:22,917 --> 00:20:24,310
it was the humans
in the menagerie
465
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:25,963
that set the Moopsy free.
466
00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:28,052
They'd seen how profitable
they were as an attraction,
467
00:20:28,052 --> 00:20:31,186
so they wanted to kill Narj and
keep the station for themselve.
468
00:20:31,186 --> 00:20:33,493
Humans-- we really
are the worst.
469
00:20:33,493 --> 00:20:34,885
So, anyway,
470
00:20:34,885 --> 00:20:37,366
instead of bringing them
to the Cerritos, we left them
471
00:20:37,366 --> 00:20:39,934
in the menagerie until somebody
else has time to pick them up.
472
00:20:39,934 --> 00:20:41,327
Could take a while.
473
00:20:41,327 --> 00:20:43,503
As for Ransom,
it took some doing,
474
00:20:43,503 --> 00:20:45,505
but Dr. T'Ana was able
to fix him up
475
00:20:45,505 --> 00:20:46,897
with a new set of chompers.
476
00:20:46,897 --> 00:20:48,595
Just don't eat any hard stuff
for a few days
477
00:20:48,595 --> 00:20:51,119
while the veneers set.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
478
00:20:51,119 --> 00:20:53,034
I have to go kill
the sheriff of Nottingham
479
00:20:53,034 --> 00:20:54,427
for being a little [bleep] face.
480
00:20:55,689 --> 00:20:57,995
So, uh, sorry I knocked
all your teeth out.
481
00:20:57,995 --> 00:20:59,736
I ended up only needing,
like, ten of them.
482
00:20:59,736 --> 00:21:02,130
I was just happy
you were following my orders.
483
00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:04,175
I'm sorry I doubted you, sir.
484
00:21:04,175 --> 00:21:06,308
I haven't always been the
most supportive over the years,
485
00:21:06,308 --> 00:21:08,354
but at least now you know
I'm definitely not gonna let you
486
00:21:08,354 --> 00:21:09,920
self-sabotage anymore.
487
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,358
So, maybe we can cool it
on the reign of terror.
488
00:21:12,358 --> 00:21:15,056
Yeah. Yeah.
That'll be, uh, interesting.
489
00:21:15,056 --> 00:21:16,144
Trust me, Mariner,
490
00:21:16,144 --> 00:21:18,146
you're gonna be a great officer.
491
00:21:18,146 --> 00:21:19,887
Just like me.
492
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:24,195
- Congrats on the promotion, man.
- Thanks.
493
00:21:24,195 --> 00:21:25,806
And great call on us
being roommates.
494
00:21:25,806 --> 00:21:27,982
We're gonna get even better
quarters than if we were alone.
495
00:21:27,982 --> 00:21:30,550
Oh, really? No way.
496
00:21:30,550 --> 00:21:31,768
Aah!
497
00:21:31,768 --> 00:21:34,205
No! Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
this can't be happening.
498
00:21:34,205 --> 00:21:35,468
Whoa! That's bright.
499
00:21:35,468 --> 00:21:38,209
Just got to dim the view ports,
500
00:21:38,209 --> 00:21:40,168
and we're all set.
501
00:21:41,822 --> 00:21:44,215
Hope you don't mind me tinkering
on projects all night. Ow!
502
00:21:44,215 --> 00:21:47,131
If you see any
sparks, just stamp them out.
503
00:21:48,350 --> 00:21:50,134
Ooh! Ah...
504
00:21:52,572 --> 00:21:53,921
Huh.
505
00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:55,270
You know what?
506
00:21:55,270 --> 00:21:57,925
This is already starting
to feel like home.
507
00:22:00,667 --> 00:22:03,365
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
508
00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:04,252
Chirp.
38117
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