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1
00:00:03,167 --> 00:00:05,000
ALL RIGHT.
WE GOT THE SHEPHERD HERE.
2
00:00:05,067 --> 00:00:07,200
WE GOT THE ANGEL HERE.
3
00:00:07,267 --> 00:00:10,934
WE GOT WISE MAN, WISE MAN....
4
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,767
AND SAMMY SOSA.
5
00:00:15,701 --> 00:00:17,601
JIM, HONEY,
WE REALLY NEED TO
GET ANOTHER WISE MAN.
6
00:00:17,667 --> 00:00:20,300
ACTUALLY, I WAS THINKING OF
TURNING THOSE TWO WISE MEN IN
7
00:00:20,367 --> 00:00:21,934
FOR A CLEANUP AND A CLOSER.
8
00:00:24,267 --> 00:00:27,067
OH, THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE.
9
00:00:27,133 --> 00:00:28,901
IT'S TOO TANGLY.
10
00:00:28,968 --> 00:00:30,801
ALL RIGHT, LET ME SEE.
11
00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:34,167
I CAN WORK WITH THIS.
12
00:00:34,234 --> 00:00:37,334
OKAY, COME ON, SNOWFLAKES.
LET'S GO OUTSIDE.
13
00:00:37,400 --> 00:00:39,467
COME ON, GIRLS.
14
00:00:39,534 --> 00:00:40,834
UH-HUH.
15
00:00:45,033 --> 00:00:46,834
HUH?
16
00:00:50,234 --> 00:00:52,767
AHHH.
17
00:00:52,834 --> 00:00:54,767
WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO BE?
18
00:00:54,834 --> 00:00:56,834
WELL, IT'S, UH...
19
00:00:56,901 --> 00:00:58,934
THE STAR OF BETHLEHEM.
20
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:02,634
AHHHH.
AHHHH.
21
00:01:02,701 --> 00:01:05,734
YOU CAN'T JUST
LEAVE IT LIKE THAT.
22
00:01:05,801 --> 00:01:09,467
WELL, HONEY, THEN,
YOU CAN TAKE THEM IN
AND UNTANGLE THEM.
23
00:01:09,534 --> 00:01:11,901
AHHHHHH.
24
00:01:13,901 --> 00:01:14,834
HAH!
25
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,000
OH, BABY.
26
00:01:21,834 --> 00:01:25,033
THIS IS YOUR GRANDMA WHEN SHE
WAS YOUR MOMMY'S AGE.
27
00:01:25,100 --> 00:01:28,968
AND THIS IS YOUR DADDY
WHEN HE WAS YOUR MOMMY'S AGE.
28
00:01:30,467 --> 00:01:31,968
WHAT'S THAT
ON DADDY'S HEAD?
29
00:01:32,033 --> 00:01:34,100
HAIR.
30
00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:36,267
HEY.
31
00:01:36,334 --> 00:01:37,701
I GOT HAIR.
32
00:01:37,767 --> 00:01:40,834
I JUST DON'T COMB IT
FORWARD ANYMORE.
33
00:01:40,901 --> 00:01:42,634
PICK IT UP. MY MOM'S
GONNA BE HERE IN 3 HOURS.
34
00:01:42,701 --> 00:01:44,767
YOU STILL NEED TO POLISH
ALL THE COCKTAIL FORKS.
35
00:01:46,267 --> 00:01:50,000
YOU KNOW, I RECOVERED A
GAME-WINNING FUMBLE IN '79.
36
00:01:50,067 --> 00:01:51,334
SWEAR TO GOD.
37
00:01:53,367 --> 00:01:54,300
Andy: HELLO,
EVERYBODY!
38
00:01:54,367 --> 00:01:55,367
HEY.
39
00:01:55,434 --> 00:01:56,567
HEY, CHERYL,
I NEED TO CHANGE
40
00:01:56,634 --> 00:01:57,934
FOR THE KIWANIS
CHRISTMAS PARTY.
41
00:01:58,000 --> 00:01:59,000
MIND IF I USE
THE BATHROOM?
42
00:01:59,067 --> 00:02:00,067
YEAH. GO AHEAD.
43
00:02:00,133 --> 00:02:01,334
JUST DON'T USE
THE LITTLE TOWELS...
44
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,601
OR THE TOILET PAPER
OR THE TOILET.
45
00:02:06,667 --> 00:02:07,667
LOOK AT YOU.
46
00:02:07,734 --> 00:02:10,100
WIFE CRACKIN' THE WHIP,
MILADY?
47
00:02:10,167 --> 00:02:11,467
ACTUALLY, A LITTLE LATER ON--
STICK AROUND--
48
00:02:11,534 --> 00:02:14,334
I'M GONNA WAX MY LEGS.
49
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,300
UNH-UNH. THAT HURTS.
50
00:02:21,100 --> 00:02:22,701
WHY CAN'T YOUR MOM JUST STAY
IN A HOTEL
51
00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:24,100
LIKE SHE DOES
EVERY OTHER TIME?
52
00:02:24,167 --> 00:02:26,167
WELL, BECAUSE THE HOLIDAYS
ARE TOUGH ON HER
53
00:02:26,234 --> 00:02:28,334
SINCE MY DAD,
YOU KNOW, LEFT US.
54
00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:30,400
CHERYL, MY DAD LEFT US
55
00:02:30,467 --> 00:02:33,334
ON A 30-YEAR SEARCH
FOR A PACK OF SMOKES.
56
00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:37,634
YOUR DAD DIED.
57
00:02:37,701 --> 00:02:39,033
AND, YOU KNOW, COME ON,
58
00:02:39,100 --> 00:02:40,133
IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS,
CHERYL.
59
00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:41,801
IT'S OKAY
TO SAY THE "D" WORD NOW.
60
00:02:41,868 --> 00:02:42,868
WHATEVER.
MY MOM IS COMING.
61
00:02:42,934 --> 00:02:44,267
WE'RE GONNA
MAKE THE BEST OF IT.
62
00:02:44,334 --> 00:02:46,267
NOW GET BACK TO
POLISHING YOUR SILVER.
63
00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:48,234
THIS IS NOT MINE,
BECAUSE IF IT WAS MY SILVER,
64
00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:50,834
I'D BE MELTING IT DOWN
RIGHT NOW.
65
00:02:50,901 --> 00:02:53,367
OH, LOOK, IT'S MOM AND DAD'S
WEDDING PICTURE.
66
00:02:53,434 --> 00:02:54,434
OHH.
67
00:02:54,501 --> 00:02:55,667
HEY, SEE
THAT PEARL NECKLACE
68
00:02:55,734 --> 00:02:57,634
GREAT-GRANDMA
CHERYL'S WEARING?
69
00:02:57,701 --> 00:02:59,367
SHE GAVE IT
TO MY MOM,
70
00:02:59,434 --> 00:03:00,901
MY MOM IS GONNA
GIVE IT TO ME,
71
00:03:00,968 --> 00:03:01,968
AND WHEN YOU
GROW UP,
72
00:03:02,033 --> 00:03:04,734
I AM GONNA GIVE IT
TO YOU.
73
00:03:04,801 --> 00:03:05,734
HOW COME NOT ME?
74
00:03:05,801 --> 00:03:07,100
BECAUSE YOU'RE
THE MIDDLE CHILD,
75
00:03:07,167 --> 00:03:09,400
AND THE MIDDLE CHILD
DOESN'T COUNT.
76
00:03:11,033 --> 00:03:12,667
GIRLS, DID YOU CLEAN YOUR ROOM?
77
00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:14,267
YES.
YES.
78
00:03:14,334 --> 00:03:16,300
GIRLS, GO CLEAN YOUR ROOM.
79
00:03:16,367 --> 00:03:17,667
[ BOTH WHINING ]
80
00:03:17,734 --> 00:03:19,934
I KNOW, I KNOW.
81
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,033
THANK YOU, GIRLS.
82
00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:25,834
HO HO HO!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
83
00:03:25,901 --> 00:03:27,601
SEE YOU LATER, ANDY.
84
00:03:27,667 --> 00:03:30,601
MY CHESTNUTS ARE ROASTING
IN THIS THING.
85
00:03:33,367 --> 00:03:35,701
Uncle Andy's
Santa Claus!
86
00:03:35,767 --> 00:03:37,534
I know!
87
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,701
YOUR MOMMY THINKS I GIVE YOU
TOO MANY PRESENTS.
88
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:47,534
BUT I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN
TO YOUR MOMMY
89
00:03:47,601 --> 00:03:48,734
BECAUSE I'M HER MOMMY.
90
00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:52,300
YEAH, MOM, YOU REALLY
DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
91
00:03:52,367 --> 00:03:53,968
THEY'RE GONNA GET PLENTY
OF PRESENTS FROM SANTA.
92
00:03:54,033 --> 00:03:56,834
REALLY? WE'RE GONNA
GET LOTS OF PRESENTS?
93
00:03:56,901 --> 00:03:58,000
YEAH, SURE.
94
00:03:58,067 --> 00:03:59,501
I WANT A DOLLHOUSE.
95
00:03:59,567 --> 00:04:01,367
YEAH? GO TELL IT
TO SANTA.
96
00:04:01,434 --> 00:04:02,567
SHE JUST DID.
97
00:04:04,467 --> 00:04:06,801
AND SOME FOR MY GIRLS.
98
00:04:06,868 --> 00:04:07,801
AHH!
99
00:04:07,868 --> 00:04:09,300
[ MOUTHING, NO AUDIO ]
100
00:04:09,367 --> 00:04:11,567
HORS D'OEUVRIES!
101
00:04:11,634 --> 00:04:14,133
OOH, JIM, NICE FANNING
OF THE CRACKERS THERE.
102
00:04:15,834 --> 00:04:17,467
HONEST TO GOD,
TIME WAS RUNNING OUT,
103
00:04:17,534 --> 00:04:20,534
I WAS ON THE GOAL LINE,
EVERYBODY CHEERED.
104
00:04:21,601 --> 00:04:24,501
OH!
OH!
105
00:04:24,567 --> 00:04:25,901
I MEAN,
THAT WAS MY CHAIR.
106
00:04:25,968 --> 00:04:27,167
NO, NO, NO, THAT'S OKAY!
107
00:04:27,234 --> 00:04:31,634
NO, NO, NO,
I HATE THIS ONE.
108
00:04:31,701 --> 00:04:34,400
DANA,
YOU LOOK FANTASTIC.
109
00:04:34,467 --> 00:04:37,000
IT'S SMART THAT YOU STAY TRIM.
MEN LIKE THAT.
110
00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:38,567
REALLY? THANK YOU, MOM,
111
00:04:38,634 --> 00:04:41,200
BECAUSE I WAS ACTUALLY
THINKING OF GOING
ANOTHER WAY, BUT--
112
00:04:41,267 --> 00:04:44,534
BUT, YOU KNOW, YOU REALLY SHOULD
ACCENTUATE YOUR BOSOM MORE.
113
00:04:44,601 --> 00:04:47,234
YOU HAVE SUCH NICE BOSOMS.
AM I RIGHT, JIM?
114
00:04:51,167 --> 00:04:52,734
WELL, YOU KNOW,
I REALLY DON'T KNOW,
MAGGIE.
115
00:04:52,801 --> 00:04:55,200
I'M AN ASS MAN.
116
00:04:55,267 --> 00:04:57,267
OH, CHERYL...
117
00:04:57,334 --> 00:05:00,033
NOW, WHY DO YOU HIDE YOUR EYES
WITH THOSE BANGS?
118
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,267
MOM, EVERYBODY WEARS IT
THIS WAY NOW.
119
00:05:02,334 --> 00:05:04,834
WELL, IF EVERYBODY
JUMPED OFF A BRIDGE,
120
00:05:04,901 --> 00:05:06,667
WOULD YOU DO THAT, TOO?
121
00:05:06,734 --> 00:05:08,067
TODAY I WOULD.
122
00:05:10,067 --> 00:05:13,234
AND THERE'S MY LITTLE KYLE.
123
00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:15,601
DOES MY PEANUT
WANT A PEANUT?
124
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:16,701
NO, MOM,
HE CAN'T HAVE A PEANUT.
125
00:05:16,767 --> 00:05:18,767
HE COULD CHOKE
OR DEVELOP AN ALLERGY.
126
00:05:18,834 --> 00:05:19,767
OH, NONSENSE, HONEY.
127
00:05:19,834 --> 00:05:20,901
I USED TO GIVE YOU KIDS
PEANUT BUTTER
128
00:05:20,968 --> 00:05:22,367
ALL THE TIME
WHEN YOU WERE BABIES.
129
00:05:22,434 --> 00:05:23,734
A LITTLE SMEAR
AROUND THE NIPPLE
130
00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:26,133
WAS THE ONLY WAY
I'D GET ANDY INTERESTED
IN THE BREAST.
131
00:05:39,634 --> 00:05:41,367
Dana: HEY, YOU GUYS, LOOK.
132
00:05:41,434 --> 00:05:43,167
THIS IS THE ORNAMENT
THAT DAD GAVE US
133
00:05:43,234 --> 00:05:44,167
WHEN YOU GUYS
WENT TO LONDON.
134
00:05:44,234 --> 00:05:45,467
YOU REMEMBER, MOM?
135
00:05:45,534 --> 00:05:48,100
YOU KNOW, I'D LOVE
SOMETHING COLD TO DRINK.
136
00:05:49,100 --> 00:05:53,968
UH...OKAY, MOM.
WHAT CAN I GET YOU?
137
00:05:54,033 --> 00:05:56,634
I'D, UH, LOVE A GLASS
OF TOMATO JUICE.
138
00:05:56,701 --> 00:06:01,234
OKAY, UM, I'M JUST GONNA
RUN TO THE STORE, AND--
139
00:06:01,300 --> 00:06:03,400
OH, NO, NO.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
140
00:06:03,467 --> 00:06:04,868
NO, NO, MOM. IT'S OKAY.
141
00:06:04,934 --> 00:06:07,968
I HAVE EVERY OTHER JUICE,
JUST NOT TOMATO JUICE.
142
00:06:08,033 --> 00:06:10,100
NO, NO, HONEY.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
143
00:06:10,167 --> 00:06:11,400
YOU KNOW, I DON'T WANT
TO BE DIFFICULT HERE.
144
00:06:11,467 --> 00:06:14,367
I'LL JUST HAVE SOME...
CARROT JUICE.
145
00:06:17,534 --> 00:06:20,367
UH...MAGGIE,
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
146
00:06:20,434 --> 00:06:22,801
HOW ABOUT YOU AND I
SPLIT A BEER?
147
00:06:22,868 --> 00:06:24,534
I'LL TAKE THE INSIDE.
148
00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:27,267
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
149
00:06:27,334 --> 00:06:28,934
WHERE DO YOU COME UP
WITH THESE THINGS?
150
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,200
I GOT A BOOK
IN THE BATHROOM.
151
00:06:31,267 --> 00:06:33,367
HA HA HA HA HA!
152
00:06:33,434 --> 00:06:35,701
OHH! "I DON'T WANT
TO BE DIFFICULT.
153
00:06:35,767 --> 00:06:39,434
I'LL JUST HAVE SOME
IMPOSSIBLE JUICE."
154
00:06:39,501 --> 00:06:42,501
WHO HAS TOMATO JUICE?
DO YOU HAVE TOMATO JUICE?
155
00:06:42,567 --> 00:06:43,734
I DON'T EVEN HAVE
A TOMATO.
156
00:06:43,801 --> 00:06:45,767
WELL,
ACCORDING TO MOM,
157
00:06:45,834 --> 00:06:47,100
YOU HAVE
VERY NICE TOMATOES.
158
00:06:47,167 --> 00:06:48,534
HMM.
159
00:06:48,601 --> 00:06:51,133
ANYWAY, THAT'S WHY
I'M NO LONGER WELCOME
IN CANADA.
160
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,400
[ MAGGIE LAUGHING ]
161
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:56,534
OH, THANK YOU,
HONEY.
162
00:06:56,601 --> 00:06:58,300
SO, WHERE AM I
SLEEPING?
163
00:06:58,367 --> 00:07:03,234
OH, I THOUGHT THAT THE GIRLS
WOULD SLEEP IN KYLE'S ROOM
164
00:07:03,300 --> 00:07:05,200
AND THEN YOU COULD SLEEP
IN THE GIRLS' ROOM.
165
00:07:05,267 --> 00:07:07,033
OH.
166
00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:09,501
THE GIRLS' ROOM.
167
00:07:09,567 --> 00:07:11,734
OR YOU COULD SLEEP
IN OUR ROOM.
168
00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:17,701
OR...YOU COULD SLEEP
IN THE GIRLS' ROOM.
169
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,033
AUGH!
170
00:07:42,033 --> 00:07:44,167
UNH!
171
00:07:44,234 --> 00:07:46,367
HOW DOES ANYBODY SLEEP
IN THIS BED?!
172
00:07:46,434 --> 00:07:50,067
NO WONDER GRACIE'S
SO DAMN GRUMPY
ALL THE TIME.
173
00:07:50,133 --> 00:07:53,601
YEAH, HONEY,
THAT'S WHERE SHE GETS IT.
174
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:55,400
DO YOU KNOW
WHAT MY MOTHER DID TONIGHT?
175
00:07:55,467 --> 00:07:57,667
SHE WASHED THE DISHES.
176
00:07:58,734 --> 00:08:00,801
LET'S KILL HER.
177
00:08:01,968 --> 00:08:04,067
NO, NO,
AFTER I WASHED THEM.
178
00:08:04,133 --> 00:08:06,200
IT IS SO INSULTING.
179
00:08:06,267 --> 00:08:07,267
OHH.
180
00:08:08,968 --> 00:08:10,968
OH, IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER
WHEN MY DAD WAS HERE.
181
00:08:11,033 --> 00:08:12,701
HE WAS SUCH A GREAT BUFFER.
182
00:08:12,767 --> 00:08:14,968
I LIKED HIM.
YEAH.
183
00:08:15,033 --> 00:08:17,567
HEY, YOU REMEMBER
WHEN WE USED TO GO TO
RESTAURANTS TOGETHER
184
00:08:17,634 --> 00:08:22,667
AND WE WOULD ALWAYS
WRESTLE FOR THE CHECK
UNTIL HE TOOK IT?
185
00:08:22,734 --> 00:08:25,267
CHERYL, THAT IS A MARK
OF A GREAT MAN.
186
00:08:25,334 --> 00:08:29,267
I DON'T KNOW HOW
I'M GONNA MAKE IT
THROUGH 3 DAYS.
187
00:08:29,334 --> 00:08:33,834
I HAVE AN IDEA
THAT WOULD KEEP
YOUR MIND OFF IT.
188
00:08:35,934 --> 00:08:37,133
AAH!
189
00:08:38,868 --> 00:08:39,801
Jim!
190
00:08:39,868 --> 00:08:42,000
Jim, this is
our children's room,
191
00:08:42,067 --> 00:08:44,000
and my mother
is right down the hall.
192
00:08:44,067 --> 00:08:46,334
Oh, keep talking,
keep talking,
keep talking.
193
00:08:51,067 --> 00:08:53,601
SHE'S GONNA RUIN
MY CHRISTMAS.
194
00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:55,868
I WISH
SHE'D STAY IN A HOTEL.
195
00:08:55,934 --> 00:08:58,467
YOU KNOW WHAT?
196
00:08:58,534 --> 00:09:01,067
HOW ABOUT IF SHE STAYS
HERE WITH THE KIDS
197
00:09:01,133 --> 00:09:03,434
AND WE GO TO A HOTEL?
198
00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:07,100
YOU KNOW,
WE CAN MEET IN THE BAR.
199
00:09:07,167 --> 00:09:12,434
YOU COULD BE...
ANGELINA JOLIE,
200
00:09:12,501 --> 00:09:15,033
AND I COULD BE...
201
00:09:15,100 --> 00:09:16,934
WELL, IF YOU'RE
GONNA BE HER,
I'M GONNA BE ME.
202
00:09:21,434 --> 00:09:23,934
GOOD NIGHT, JIM.
203
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:25,267
[ SQUEAK ]
204
00:09:26,501 --> 00:09:28,033
THAT WAS NOT ME.
205
00:09:31,167 --> 00:09:32,801
[ SQUEAKING ]
206
00:09:37,067 --> 00:09:38,400
HEY,
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
207
00:09:38,467 --> 00:09:39,834
I'M GOING
TO THE KITCHEN.
208
00:09:39,901 --> 00:09:42,334
IF I CAN'T SLEEP
OR HAVE SEX,
I'M GONNA EAT.
209
00:09:44,534 --> 00:09:45,501
[ DOOR CLOSES ]
210
00:09:45,567 --> 00:09:49,000
OHH! DAMN IT, JIM,
THAT WAS YOU!
211
00:09:56,701 --> 00:09:58,167
HEY, MAGGIE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP?
212
00:09:58,234 --> 00:09:59,334
OH, COULDN'T SLEEP.
213
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,334
BED UNCOMFORTABLE?
214
00:10:03,534 --> 00:10:06,234
I MEAN, IF YOU WANT TO
SWITCH ROOMS, THAT'S OKAY.
215
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:07,367
ARE YOU KIDDING?
216
00:10:07,434 --> 00:10:09,200
THAT MATTRESS
IS PERFECT.
217
00:10:09,267 --> 00:10:10,968
IT'S LIKE SLEEPING
ON A CLOUD.
218
00:10:11,033 --> 00:10:12,934
WHO'S THE BIG
RAISINET EATER?
219
00:10:14,901 --> 00:10:17,000
CHERYL.
220
00:10:17,067 --> 00:10:19,400
SHE DID A BEAUTIFUL JOB
WITH THE BEDROOM,
THOUGH.
221
00:10:19,467 --> 00:10:23,100
YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW,
IT'S NICE.
222
00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:26,901
IT'S NOT A HOTEL.
223
00:10:26,968 --> 00:10:29,968
I MEAN, IT DOESN'T HAVE
AN HONOR BAR, YOU KNOW.
224
00:10:30,033 --> 00:10:31,801
AND I MEAN,
THE TOILETS ARE CLEAN,
225
00:10:31,868 --> 00:10:35,868
BUT THEY'RE NOT SANITIZED
FOR YOUR PROTECTION.
226
00:10:35,934 --> 00:10:39,367
JIM, ARE YOU TRYING
TO GET ME TO GO TO A HOTEL?
227
00:10:39,434 --> 00:10:42,834
WELL, MAGGIE,
228
00:10:42,901 --> 00:10:45,067
YOU KNOW, I ADORE YOU.
229
00:10:45,133 --> 00:10:48,701
AND I JUST GOTTA TELL YOU
THAT THE TRUTH IS
230
00:10:48,767 --> 00:10:50,834
IT IS A LITTLE CROWDED
HERE RIGHT NOW,
231
00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:52,300
AND CHERYL AND I
WERE JUST TALKING--
232
00:10:52,367 --> 00:10:53,667
CHERYL?!
YEAH.
233
00:10:53,734 --> 00:10:54,801
WHAT?
234
00:10:54,868 --> 00:10:57,834
DO YOU WANT ME
TO GO TO A HOTEL?
235
00:10:57,901 --> 00:10:59,133
HUH?
236
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,801
I WAS JUST TALKING
TO YOUR MOTHER
237
00:11:00,868 --> 00:11:01,968
ABOUT HOW WE WERE
DISCUSSING
238
00:11:02,033 --> 00:11:03,901
THAT MAYBE IT WOULD BE
EASIER FOR EVERYONE
239
00:11:03,968 --> 00:11:05,234
IF SHE JUST STAYED
IN A HOTEL.
240
00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:06,767
IS THAT TRUE, CHERYL?
241
00:11:11,467 --> 00:11:12,868
NO, MOMMY.
242
00:11:20,534 --> 00:11:22,100
Jim: HOW COULD YOU
BAIL ON ME LIKE THAT?
243
00:11:22,167 --> 00:11:24,501
CLOSE THE DOOR.
244
00:11:24,567 --> 00:11:26,567
HOW COULD YOU TELL MY MOTHER
TO GO TO A HOTEL?
245
00:11:26,634 --> 00:11:28,634
CHERYL, I WAS JUST
TRYING TO HELP.
246
00:11:28,701 --> 00:11:31,834
BESIDES,
NOW SHE'S NOT GOING,
THANKS TO YOU.
247
00:11:31,901 --> 00:11:35,267
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
THAT PIE WAS FOR CHRISTMAS!
248
00:11:35,334 --> 00:11:36,767
SHE ATE SOME, TOO!
249
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,300
DID SHE LIKE IT?
250
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,033
YOU ARE
OUT OF YOUR MIND!
251
00:11:43,601 --> 00:11:47,400
CHERYL, YOU HAVE TO
STAND UP TO THAT WOMAN.
252
00:11:47,467 --> 00:11:48,601
I CAN'T.
253
00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:49,601
WHAT, ARE YOU GONNA BE
10 YEARS OLD
254
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:50,601
THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?
255
00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:51,667
YEAH.
YEAH?
256
00:11:51,734 --> 00:11:53,267
YEAH!
257
00:11:59,234 --> 00:12:01,200
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
WHAT YOU'VE DONE HERE?
258
00:12:01,267 --> 00:12:02,767
ME?!
YES, YOU!
259
00:12:02,834 --> 00:12:04,367
NOW, NOW, CHRISTMAS
IS GONNA BE A MESS,
260
00:12:04,434 --> 00:12:06,934
JUST LIKE THANKSGIVING,
HALLOWEEN, AND EASTER.
261
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,133
YEAH? WELL, MAYBE
YOU NEED TO TAKE
A GOOD LOOK AT YOURSELF
262
00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:10,901
AND FIGURE OUT
WHAT YOU DO
263
00:12:10,968 --> 00:12:13,667
THAT MAKES ME RUIN
THE HOLIDAYS.
264
00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:14,834
I MEAN. CHERYL--
265
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:18,367
J-J-JIM, DON'T.
REALLY, JUST DON'T!
266
00:12:20,534 --> 00:12:21,734
[ SIGHS ]
267
00:12:25,868 --> 00:12:28,133
YOU HAVE A CHAIR
STUCK TO YOUR BUTT.
268
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,834
I'LL GET IT
IN THE MORNING.
269
00:12:43,567 --> 00:12:44,734
HEY, CHERYL,
COME ON IN!
270
00:12:44,801 --> 00:12:47,033
WE'RE OPENING UP
MAGGIE'S GIFTS!
271
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:48,667
YEAH, MOM, WHY ARE WE
DOING THIS TONIGHT?
272
00:12:48,734 --> 00:12:50,367
WE HAVEN'T EVEN WRAPPED
OUR PRESENTS FOR YOU YET.
273
00:12:50,434 --> 00:12:53,067
WELL, SINCE I AM
LEAVING FOR
AUNT CAROLYN'S TOMORROW,
274
00:12:53,133 --> 00:12:54,467
I THOUGHT
WE'D DO IT NOW.
275
00:12:56,267 --> 00:12:57,400
ASK SANTA.
276
00:12:57,467 --> 00:12:58,767
YOU ASK HIM.
277
00:13:00,834 --> 00:13:02,734
WHY ARE YOU
STILL HERE?
278
00:13:05,267 --> 00:13:07,667
IT'S CHRISTMAS EVE.
YOU HAVE TO GO.
279
00:13:07,734 --> 00:13:09,834
IN A LITTLE BIT.
NOW CUT IT OUT.
280
00:13:09,901 --> 00:13:11,200
YOU'RE STARTING
TO MAKE ME MAD.
281
00:13:11,267 --> 00:13:14,167
Both: WE'RE SORRY! WE'RE SORRY!
WE'RE SORRY! WE'RE SORRY!
282
00:13:14,234 --> 00:13:15,167
WE'RE GOING TO BED!
283
00:13:15,234 --> 00:13:16,634
LOOK! WE'RE GOING TO BED!
284
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:23,067
YOU ARE NEXT, CHERYL.
285
00:13:27,567 --> 00:13:29,200
I WONDER WHAT THAT IS.
286
00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:32,267
OH, WELL, THAT IS YOURS.
287
00:13:32,334 --> 00:13:34,000
HERE'S YOURS, CHERYL.
288
00:13:34,067 --> 00:13:36,100
OH.
289
00:13:36,167 --> 00:13:37,100
DANA?
290
00:13:37,167 --> 00:13:38,968
MOM, ISN'T THAT
FOR CH--
291
00:13:39,033 --> 00:13:41,067
DANA, TAKE IT.
292
00:13:48,133 --> 00:13:50,167
OOH.
293
00:13:50,234 --> 00:13:53,267
GRAMMY CHERYL'S
PEARL NECKLACE.
294
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,033
THANKS, MOM.
295
00:13:56,100 --> 00:13:57,200
[ BLOWS KISS ]
296
00:13:59,834 --> 00:14:04,634
HEY, CHERYL, LOOK--
GRAMMY'S PEARL NECKLACE.
297
00:14:04,701 --> 00:14:06,000
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
298
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:11,067
BECAUSE IF YOU HAD
SOMETHING TO SAY,
299
00:14:11,133 --> 00:14:13,567
THIS WOULD BE THE TIME
TO DO IT.
300
00:14:16,734 --> 00:14:18,400
OKAY, THEN.
301
00:14:18,467 --> 00:14:20,701
I GUESS EVERYTHING'S FINE
WITH EVERYBODY.
302
00:14:20,767 --> 00:14:22,200
UM...
303
00:14:22,267 --> 00:14:24,534
LOOK! CHERYL'S GOT
SOMETHING TO SAY!
304
00:14:26,267 --> 00:14:29,567
YOU KNOW FULL WELL THAT NECKLACE
WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MINE!
305
00:14:29,634 --> 00:14:31,868
LOOK, I WOULD RATHER NOT
DISCUSS THIS RIGHT NOW.
306
00:14:31,934 --> 00:14:33,133
WHY?
307
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:36,167
BECAU--
BECAUSE I AM YOUR MOTHER.
308
00:14:36,234 --> 00:14:37,167
END OF DISCUSSION.
309
00:14:37,234 --> 00:14:38,200
N-NO, NO, NO. NO.
310
00:14:38,267 --> 00:14:39,200
IT'S BECAUSE
YOU'RE PUNISHING ME
311
00:14:39,267 --> 00:14:40,767
BECAUSE YOU DON'T THINK
I WANT YOU HERE.
312
00:14:40,834 --> 00:14:43,133
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
WHY WOULD I
313
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:45,501
WHEN YOU MAKE ME FEEL
ABOUT THIS BIG--
314
00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:48,234
WITH BANGS?!
315
00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:50,467
GOD, I AM SICK OF IT!
316
00:14:57,300 --> 00:14:59,868
YOU KNOW, MAGGIE...
317
00:14:59,934 --> 00:15:01,400
I WANTED YOU TO STAY.
318
00:15:11,901 --> 00:15:13,601
AH!
319
00:15:13,667 --> 00:15:14,734
DADDY?
YES.
320
00:15:14,801 --> 00:15:16,868
DID YOU FINISH
PUTTING IN
THE BATTERIES?
321
00:15:16,934 --> 00:15:20,701
WHOO, HONEY,
IT'S GONNA TAKE A WHILE.
322
00:15:20,767 --> 00:15:22,100
THIS IS REALLY HARD.
323
00:15:27,534 --> 00:15:28,901
HEY, CHERYL.
324
00:15:28,968 --> 00:15:31,167
BOY, YOU SURE TOOK
A LONG SHOWER.
325
00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:34,234
YOU JUST MISSED YOUR MOM.
326
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:36,734
IT WAS ALMOST LIKE
YOU DIDN'T WANT TO BE
HERE WHEN SHE LEFT.
327
00:15:36,801 --> 00:15:38,567
YOU READY FOR LUNCH?
328
00:15:38,634 --> 00:15:41,968
CHERYL, COME ON.
IT'S 10:00 IN THE MORNING.
329
00:15:42,033 --> 00:15:43,300
OKAY!
330
00:15:44,968 --> 00:15:46,033
HOW ABOUT
A TURKEY SANDWICH?
331
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:47,367
OKAY.
332
00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:53,167
SO...WE'RE JUST GONNA
IGNORE EVERYTHING?
333
00:15:53,234 --> 00:15:54,968
YOU WANT MAYO?
334
00:15:55,033 --> 00:15:56,100
BOTH SIDES.
335
00:15:56,167 --> 00:15:58,734
I'M SORRY.
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE MAYO.
336
00:15:58,801 --> 00:16:00,100
THEN WHY
DID YOU ASK ME?
337
00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:01,434
I WASN'T THINKING,
ALL RIGHT?
338
00:16:01,501 --> 00:16:03,534
BECAUSE YOU WERE THINKING
ABOUT YOUR MOTHER.
339
00:16:03,601 --> 00:16:04,567
[ SIGHS ] FINE.
340
00:16:17,667 --> 00:16:18,701
CHERYL...
341
00:16:18,767 --> 00:16:22,000
NEVER MAKE SANDWICHES
OUT OF ANGER.
342
00:16:22,067 --> 00:16:24,501
LOOK, JIM, I DID WHAT
YOU WANTED ME TO DO.
343
00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:25,767
I TOLD HER HOW I FELT.
344
00:16:25,834 --> 00:16:27,200
I KNOW, HONEY,
AND YOU DID GOOD.
345
00:16:27,267 --> 00:16:29,601
YOU REALLY DID.
YOU STOOD UP TO HER.
346
00:16:29,667 --> 00:16:32,767
BUT, YOU KNOW, YOU HAD
YOUR LITTLE TANTRUM,
347
00:16:32,834 --> 00:16:35,701
AND YOU STORMED OUT.
348
00:16:35,767 --> 00:16:37,334
YOU KNOW, THAT'S FUN.
349
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:40,000
YOU KNOW,
EVERYBODY LIKES TO DO THAT.
350
00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:42,367
BUT, YOU KNOW,
AFTER YOU STORM OUT, HONEY,
351
00:16:42,434 --> 00:16:46,934
YOU HAVE TO COME BACK.
YOU GOTTA FINISH IT.
352
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,167
I CAN'T.
353
00:16:48,234 --> 00:16:49,534
YEAH, YOU CAN, HONEY.
354
00:16:49,601 --> 00:16:50,901
YOU DO IT ALL THE TIME
WITH ME.
355
00:16:50,968 --> 00:16:52,634
YOU DON'T LET ME
OFF THE HOOK.
356
00:16:53,834 --> 00:16:56,801
NO. NO, HONEY,
I MEAN, I CAN'T.
SHE'S GONE.
357
00:16:56,868 --> 00:16:59,167
CHERYL...
358
00:16:59,234 --> 00:17:00,968
YOUR FATHER IS GONE.
359
00:17:02,701 --> 00:17:04,334
YOUR MOTHER'S AT THE AIRPORT.
360
00:17:06,667 --> 00:17:09,834
ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO.
361
00:17:09,901 --> 00:17:12,200
I'LL CALL ANDY
TO WATCH THE KIDS.
362
00:17:12,267 --> 00:17:15,868
AND YOU'RE NEVER GONNA
HEAR ME SAY THIS AGAIN.
363
00:17:15,934 --> 00:17:17,868
GO PUT ON SOME CLOTHES.
364
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,133
CHERYL,
THERE SHE IS.
365
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:31,467
WHAT DO I SAY?
366
00:17:31,534 --> 00:17:33,501
WELL, YOU CAN START
BY SAYING,
367
00:17:33,567 --> 00:17:35,434
"REALLY ENJOYED YOU.
368
00:17:35,501 --> 00:17:38,400
"IT WAS NICE THAT YOU CAME.
THE KIDS REALLY ENJOYED YOU.
369
00:17:38,467 --> 00:17:41,133
JIM PREFERS CASH
AT CHRISTMAS."
370
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,968
HONEY,
I'LL FIGURE IT OUT.
371
00:17:44,033 --> 00:17:45,033
OKAY, GOOD LUCK.
372
00:17:45,100 --> 00:17:46,300
OH, THANK YOU.
373
00:17:52,234 --> 00:17:53,300
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
374
00:17:53,367 --> 00:17:54,634
IT'S A GOOD-LUCK KISS.
375
00:17:54,701 --> 00:17:55,868
WHAT?
376
00:17:55,934 --> 00:17:58,167
HONEY, WE HAVEN'T
HAD SEX FOR DAYS.
377
00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:05,667
OH, HONEY,
CAN I HAVE A DOLLAR
FOR SOME POP?
378
00:18:05,734 --> 00:18:07,000
OH, SURE.
379
00:18:07,067 --> 00:18:08,567
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
380
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:20,033
YEAH, IT'S A PURSE.
381
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,200
I'M A BIG OLD GIRL.
382
00:18:28,767 --> 00:18:30,267
HEY.
383
00:18:30,334 --> 00:18:33,167
WELL, HI.
I'M SURPRISED
TO SEE YOU HERE.
384
00:18:33,234 --> 00:18:34,434
SO, YOU'RE OFF
TO AUNT CAROLYN'S?
385
00:18:34,501 --> 00:18:35,534
YEAH.
YEAH.
386
00:18:35,601 --> 00:18:36,634
YOU KNOW, MOM,
387
00:18:36,701 --> 00:18:38,701
I AM SORRY I SAID
THOSE THINGS,
388
00:18:38,767 --> 00:18:43,234
AND I'M SORRY
I WASN'T THERE
WHEN YOU LEFT.
389
00:18:43,300 --> 00:18:45,567
OH, THAT'S NOT
WHAT I CAME HERE
TO SAY.
390
00:18:48,534 --> 00:18:50,767
MOM, I-I JUST--
391
00:18:50,834 --> 00:18:54,000
I DIDN'T
WANT YOU TO LEAVE
WITHOUT US BEING OKAY.
392
00:18:54,067 --> 00:18:56,667
I'M A GROWN-UP.
I'LL GET OVER IT.
393
00:18:56,734 --> 00:18:58,501
NO, MOM, YOU WON'T.
YOU WON'T.
394
00:18:58,567 --> 00:18:59,901
YOU'LL DO EXACTLY
WHAT I DO.
YOU'LL IGNORE IT.
395
00:18:59,968 --> 00:19:01,434
AND THEN NEXT YEAR,
YOU'LL COME BACK
396
00:19:01,501 --> 00:19:02,667
AND PRETEND
EVERYTHING'S FINE,
397
00:19:02,734 --> 00:19:04,767
AND THE SAME THING
IS GONNA HAPPEN
ALL OVER AGAIN.
398
00:19:04,834 --> 00:19:05,968
LOOK, I'M NOT SURE
WHAT YOU WANT FROM ME.
399
00:19:06,033 --> 00:19:10,634
MOM, I JUST--
I WANT US TO GET ALONG.
400
00:19:10,701 --> 00:19:14,968
I WANT US
TO BE ABLE TO TALK.
401
00:19:15,033 --> 00:19:16,067
AND I WANT TO KNOW
402
00:19:16,133 --> 00:19:17,534
WHY YOU GAVE
THAT PEARL NECKLACE
TO DANA.
403
00:19:17,601 --> 00:19:19,734
IS IT BECAUSE
OF THE HOTEL THING?
404
00:19:19,801 --> 00:19:22,601
OH, NO, HONEY...
405
00:19:22,667 --> 00:19:24,367
ALTHOUGH IT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT THAT DIDN'T HURT
406
00:19:24,434 --> 00:19:27,968
LIKE A RED-HOT POKER
GOING THROUGH MY HEART.
407
00:19:28,033 --> 00:19:30,200
JIM'S IDEA, HONEST.
408
00:19:33,067 --> 00:19:34,868
LOOK.
409
00:19:34,934 --> 00:19:39,501
I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING THEN
BECAUSE...
410
00:19:39,567 --> 00:19:41,534
LOOK, I WANTED TO GIVE DANA
THE NECKLACE
411
00:19:41,601 --> 00:19:44,801
BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T
HAVE SOMEONE IN HER LIFE
412
00:19:44,868 --> 00:19:47,033
TO BUY HER NICE THINGS,
YOU KNOW,
413
00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:49,033
TO TELL HER
THAT SHE'S SPECIAL,
414
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:50,167
LIKE YOU HAVE JIM
415
00:19:50,234 --> 00:19:52,467
AND LIKE I HAD YOUR DAD
BEFORE HE LEFT.
416
00:19:52,534 --> 00:19:55,167
DIED.
417
00:19:55,234 --> 00:19:57,601
HE DIED, MOM.
418
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:02,167
I KNOW.
419
00:20:06,801 --> 00:20:09,100
YOU KNOW, YOU REALLY DO
HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES.
420
00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:10,701
OH, THANK YOU, MOM.
421
00:20:12,834 --> 00:20:15,100
YOU HAVE
YOUR FATHER'S EYES.
422
00:20:17,501 --> 00:20:19,701
AND I MISS HIM.
423
00:20:20,968 --> 00:20:22,968
I MISS HIM, TOO.
424
00:20:25,801 --> 00:20:28,834
CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE
TAKE THIS PURSE?
425
00:20:28,901 --> 00:20:30,667
I MEAN,
I KNOW IT MATCHES
AND EVERYTHING,
426
00:20:30,734 --> 00:20:32,033
BUT, YOU KNOW...
427
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:35,133
Man on P.A.:
FLIGHT 63 NOW BOARDING.
428
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:36,567
THAT'S ME.
429
00:20:36,634 --> 00:20:39,000
WELL, WE'LL SEE YOU,
MAGGIE.
430
00:20:39,067 --> 00:20:40,901
NOT IF I SEE YOU
FIRST.
431
00:20:40,968 --> 00:20:43,167
HEY, YOU BEEN
READING MY BOOK
IN THE BATHROOM!
432
00:20:45,033 --> 00:20:46,067
BYE, CHERYL.
433
00:20:46,133 --> 00:20:47,567
OH, BYE, MOM.
434
00:20:49,434 --> 00:20:52,567
BYE, MAGGIE.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
435
00:20:52,634 --> 00:20:53,634
YOU, TOO.
436
00:20:58,968 --> 00:21:00,834
OHH...
437
00:21:00,901 --> 00:21:03,300
THANK YOU FOR
DRAGGING ME DOWN HERE.
438
00:21:03,367 --> 00:21:06,300
WELL, I WAS COMING
THIS WAY, ANYWAY.
439
00:21:06,367 --> 00:21:09,901
SO...HOW DID IT GO?
440
00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:12,534
AH, GREAT. SO GREAT.
441
00:21:12,601 --> 00:21:14,701
TURNS OUT SHE GAVE
THE NECKLACE TO DANA
442
00:21:14,767 --> 00:21:16,267
'CAUSE SHE THINKS
SHE'S A LOSER.
443
00:21:18,534 --> 00:21:20,567
MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY.
444
00:21:21,801 --> 00:21:22,734
THANK YOU.
445
00:21:24,267 --> 00:21:26,334
[ LAUGHS ]
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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