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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,100 --> 00:00:04,701 "AND WHEN BRADFORD SAW ALL HIS FRIENDS TOGETHER 2 00:00:04,767 --> 00:00:06,801 "IN THE MAGIC TREE HOUSE, HE KNEW THAT IT WAS THEM 3 00:00:06,868 --> 00:00:10,367 AND NOT THE MAGIC THAT MADE THE TREE HOUSE SO SPECIAL." 4 00:00:10,434 --> 00:00:11,934 THE END. 5 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:14,601 HEY, I WANT TO SAY "THE END"! 6 00:00:14,667 --> 00:00:16,067 OH, LOOK, LOOK, THERE'S MORE. 7 00:00:16,133 --> 00:00:17,167 OH, MY GOODNESS. 8 00:00:17,234 --> 00:00:20,701 "$5.00, U.S., $6.50 CANADA." 9 00:00:20,767 --> 00:00:22,534 THE END. 10 00:00:22,601 --> 00:00:25,834 OKAY, DADDY'S HOME. EVERYBODY MAKE A BIG DEAL. 11 00:00:25,901 --> 00:00:27,834 DADDY! DADDY! 12 00:00:27,901 --> 00:00:28,934 THANK YOU. THANK YOU, DEAR. 13 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,133 HONEY? OH, YAY. 14 00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:36,033 OH, HEY, HOW YOU DOING, SIR POOPS-A-LOT? 15 00:00:36,100 --> 00:00:37,667 DADDY? MM-HMM? 16 00:00:37,734 --> 00:00:40,701 CAN WE HAVE A MAGIC TREE HOUSE LIKE BRADFORD DOES IN THE BOOK? 17 00:00:40,767 --> 00:00:42,601 SURE, SURE. JUST BE SURE TO RETURN 18 00:00:42,667 --> 00:00:45,367 MY TOOLS WHEN YOU'RE DONE. 19 00:00:45,434 --> 00:00:47,133 JIM, YOU DID TELL THEM 20 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:48,734 YOU'D BUILD THEM A TREE HOUSE LAST YEAR, 21 00:00:48,801 --> 00:00:51,701 BUT SOMEHOW I GOT A FOOSBALL TABLE INSTEAD. 22 00:00:51,767 --> 00:00:54,434 SO, WHAT--YOU DON'T WANT ME TO EXERCISE ANYMORE? 23 00:00:54,501 --> 00:00:57,834 OH, COME ON, YOU'RE A CONTRACTOR, 24 00:00:57,901 --> 00:00:59,334 ANDY'S AN ARCHITECT. 25 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,100 YOU GUYS CAN DO THIS. 26 00:01:01,167 --> 00:01:02,367 PLEASE, DADDY, PLEASE? 27 00:01:02,434 --> 00:01:03,567 WE REALLY WANT A TREE HOUSE. 28 00:01:03,634 --> 00:01:04,634 YOU SEE, 29 00:01:04,701 --> 00:01:07,000 THIS IS THE PROBLEM WITH READING. 30 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,000 BOOKS ARE WHERE IDEAS COME FROM. 31 00:01:12,067 --> 00:01:13,000 HAH! 32 00:01:14,234 --> 00:01:15,434 OH, BABY. 33 00:01:20,734 --> 00:01:23,501 DADDY, CAN YOU PLAY BARBIES WITH US? 34 00:01:23,567 --> 00:01:25,834 OH, YOU KNOW, I REALLY WANT TO, 35 00:01:25,901 --> 00:01:29,100 BUT I GOT TO WAIT AT LEAST AN HOUR AFTER I EAT 36 00:01:29,167 --> 00:01:30,701 BEFORE PLAYING WITH BARBIES. 37 00:01:30,767 --> 00:01:33,567 OTHERWISE I GET A CRAMP. 38 00:01:33,634 --> 00:01:35,133 AND THEN WILL YOU PLAY? 39 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:38,467 SURE. UNLESS I EAT AGAIN. 40 00:01:38,534 --> 00:01:39,501 HEY, GUYS. 41 00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:41,133 HEY, ANDY, WHERE WERE YOU? 42 00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:42,434 YOU MISSED BURGERS. 43 00:01:42,501 --> 00:01:43,934 I'VE BEEN WORKING ON THIS MODEL 44 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:45,934 FOR THE KIDS' TREE HOUSE. 45 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:46,968 JEEZ. 46 00:01:47,033 --> 00:01:49,167 LOOK AT THE DETAIL ON THIS THING. 47 00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:50,534 WOW. 48 00:01:50,601 --> 00:01:52,234 YOUR NEW TREE HOUSE. 49 00:01:52,300 --> 00:01:56,133 OH, IS THAT A LITTLE RUBY AND A LITTLE GRACIE? 50 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,868 MM-HMM, AND THAT'S JIM AND YOU, 51 00:01:57,934 --> 00:01:58,934 AND LOOK, THAT'S ME. 52 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,167 WHERE AM I? 53 00:02:01,234 --> 00:02:04,300 YOU'RE IN A MODEL OF A RESTAURANT HAVING A BAD DATE. 54 00:02:05,968 --> 00:02:08,467 THE KIDS ARE GONNA LOVE THIS. 55 00:02:08,534 --> 00:02:12,267 SEE? YOU ASK, I DELIVER. 56 00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:16,767 AND WHAT EXACTLY DID YOU DO? 57 00:02:16,834 --> 00:02:20,300 I MADE THE ACTUAL GIRLS THAT GO INTO THE TREE HOUSE. 58 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,400 DOES ANYBODY WANT TO GO OUT FOR ICE CREAM? 59 00:02:23,467 --> 00:02:25,667 OKAY. BUT LET'S USE THE LITTLE SAMPLE SPOONS 60 00:02:25,734 --> 00:02:27,634 SO WE CAN PRETEND WE'RE GIANTS. 61 00:02:28,834 --> 00:02:31,033 GIRLS, WE'RE GOING OUT FOR ICE CREAM! 62 00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:32,734 Girls: YAY! ICE CREAM! 63 00:02:32,801 --> 00:02:34,367 HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? WHY DON'T YOU GUYS GO AHEAD? 64 00:02:34,434 --> 00:02:37,501 YOU KNOW, KYLE JUST WENT DOWN, AND I'M KIND OF FULL. 65 00:02:37,567 --> 00:02:39,667 YEAH, YEAH, I'M NOT GONNA GO EITHER. 66 00:02:39,734 --> 00:02:41,434 YOU KNOW, I GOTTA SCRAPE THE GRILL, 67 00:02:41,501 --> 00:02:43,267 HELP CHERYL CLEAN AND STUFF. 68 00:02:43,334 --> 00:02:44,367 THANKS. 69 00:02:44,434 --> 00:02:45,968 OKAY. SEE YA. 70 00:02:46,033 --> 00:02:47,033 SEE YOU LATER. 71 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,400 BYE, GIRLS. 72 00:02:50,167 --> 00:02:51,267 SEX? OH, YEAH. 73 00:02:51,334 --> 00:02:53,267 I FIGURE WE GOT 20 MINUTES. 74 00:02:53,334 --> 00:02:54,801 OKAY, THAT'S, UH, TWO MINUTES TO GET UNDRESSED, 75 00:02:54,868 --> 00:02:56,534 EIGHT MINUTES OF FOREPLAY, FIVE TO MAKE LOVE. 76 00:02:56,601 --> 00:02:57,868 YOU KNOW, I THINK I CAN GET THAT FOREPLAY 77 00:02:57,934 --> 00:03:00,300 DOWN TO TWO MINUTES, MAYBE ONE. 78 00:03:00,367 --> 00:03:01,934 GREAT! I CAN GET STARTED ON THE LAUNDRY. 79 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:03,434 GOOD. I GOT SOME SHIRTS. 80 00:03:06,634 --> 00:03:08,434 WOW. 81 00:03:11,334 --> 00:03:13,367 YOU'RE WELCOME. 82 00:03:15,534 --> 00:03:18,200 YOU KNOW, AND KEEPING MY SHOES ON 83 00:03:18,267 --> 00:03:20,234 REALLY GAVE ME THAT EXTRA TRACTION. 84 00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:24,767 DOES IT EVER GET TO YOU 85 00:03:24,834 --> 00:03:26,367 THAT WE ALWAYS HAVE TO SQUEEZE THIS TIME IN 86 00:03:26,434 --> 00:03:29,167 BETWEEN LOADS OF LAUNDRY AND BABY PUKE? 87 00:03:30,767 --> 00:03:32,200 YEAH, SOMETIMES. 88 00:03:32,267 --> 00:03:34,601 REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE FIRST DATING 89 00:03:34,667 --> 00:03:36,534 AND I HAD THAT LITTLE APARTMENT ON SHERIDAN 90 00:03:36,601 --> 00:03:38,133 WITH THE LEAKY ROOF? 91 00:03:39,501 --> 00:03:41,801 REMEMBER THAT FIRST NIGHT YOU STAYED OVER, 92 00:03:41,868 --> 00:03:44,234 IT RAINED AND IT RAINED? 93 00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:46,100 AND THEN WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT, 94 00:03:46,167 --> 00:03:47,868 WE LIT CANDLES. 95 00:03:47,934 --> 00:03:49,601 GOD... 96 00:03:49,667 --> 00:03:51,701 IT WAS SO ROMANTIC. 97 00:03:51,767 --> 00:03:54,767 DON'T YOU MISS THAT? 98 00:03:54,834 --> 00:03:56,767 [ SNORING ] 99 00:04:01,067 --> 00:04:02,100 YEAH. 100 00:04:02,167 --> 00:04:06,400 [ KYLE CRYING ] 101 00:04:06,467 --> 00:04:08,667 NO, NO, NO, HONEY, SERIOUSLY, LET ME GET IT. 102 00:04:16,601 --> 00:04:19,834 SO, I MADE SURE WE TOOK OUR TIME AT THE ICE CREAM PARLOR, 103 00:04:19,901 --> 00:04:21,634 AND WE DROVE AROUND THE BLOCK A FEW TIMES 104 00:04:21,701 --> 00:04:23,000 SO YOU AND JIM COULD, YOU KNOW, 105 00:04:23,067 --> 00:04:24,901 FINISH WHAT YOU WERE DOING. 106 00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:29,300 WHAT? 107 00:04:29,367 --> 00:04:30,534 OH, COME ON, CHERYL, 108 00:04:30,601 --> 00:04:32,467 JIM OFFERS TO STAY AND HELP YOU CLEAN UP, 109 00:04:32,534 --> 00:04:35,667 AND HE TURNS DOWN ICE CREAM? 110 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:36,868 YOU KNOW, DANA, 111 00:04:36,934 --> 00:04:38,067 WHEN YOU'RE MARRIED WITH THREE KIDS, 112 00:04:38,133 --> 00:04:39,667 YOU JUST GRAB THE TIME WHEN YOU CAN. 113 00:04:39,734 --> 00:04:41,667 WHY DON'T YOU AND JIM JUST GET AWAY? 114 00:04:41,734 --> 00:04:43,601 OH, LIKE ON A TRIP? YEAH. 115 00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:46,667 LOOK, I KNOW HE'S A TIGHTWAD, BUT MY TRAVEL AGENT TOLD ME 116 00:04:46,734 --> 00:04:48,567 ABOUT THIS EXCLUSIVE PLACE IN THE BAHAMAS -- 117 00:04:48,634 --> 00:04:51,300 NO PHONES, PRIVATE BUNGALOWS, 118 00:04:51,367 --> 00:04:53,033 AND THEIR MOTTO IS "WE HATE CHILDREN." 119 00:04:54,434 --> 00:04:57,033 DANA, I CAN'T JUST PICK UP AND GO. 120 00:04:57,100 --> 00:04:59,100 I'VE GOT KYLE. THE GIRLS ARE IN SCHOOL. 121 00:04:59,167 --> 00:05:01,033 I NEED A NEW LINT TRAP FOR MY DRYER. 122 00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:02,934 I HAVE A LIFE. 123 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,334 NO, YOU HAVE MOM'S LIFE. 124 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:07,567 OW. 125 00:05:07,634 --> 00:05:10,868 LOOK, YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE UP ROMANCE AND SPONTANEITY 126 00:05:10,934 --> 00:05:12,901 JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE MARRIED TO JIM. 127 00:05:14,968 --> 00:05:19,300 DANA, THERE IS A WHOLE SWEET, ROMANTIC SIDE TO JIM 128 00:05:19,367 --> 00:05:20,834 THAT YOU NEVER SEE. 129 00:05:20,901 --> 00:05:23,267 YOU KNOW, THAT MAN GAVE UP ICE CREAM FOR ME. 130 00:05:30,534 --> 00:05:33,434 YOU BRING ME BACK SOME ICE CREAM? 131 00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:34,934 NO. 132 00:05:36,133 --> 00:05:37,868 [ SCOFFS ] 133 00:05:39,868 --> 00:05:41,801 SWEETIE? 134 00:05:41,868 --> 00:05:43,300 I'LL BE UP IN A MINUTE, ALL RIGHT? 135 00:05:46,033 --> 00:05:49,267 I'LL BE ASLEEP, BUT YOU CAN WAKE ME. 136 00:05:52,501 --> 00:05:54,767 DON'T SCRATCH IT. DON'T SCRATCH IT. 137 00:05:54,834 --> 00:05:56,000 OH! 138 00:05:57,534 --> 00:05:59,601 ALL RIGHT, GIVE ME THE NUMBER 139 00:05:59,667 --> 00:06:01,767 OF YOUR TRAVEL AGENT. 140 00:06:05,834 --> 00:06:07,067 HEY, HONEY. 141 00:06:07,133 --> 00:06:08,267 HEY. 142 00:06:08,334 --> 00:06:10,133 SO, THE TREE HOUSE IS REALLY COMING ALONG. 143 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,667 YEAH, AND THE GIRLS ARE REALLY EXCITED ABOUT IT. 144 00:06:12,734 --> 00:06:15,501 AND WHEN I SAY "GIRLS," I DO MEAN ANDY. 145 00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:19,667 I CAN HEAR YOU IN THERE! 146 00:06:19,734 --> 00:06:23,100 ANDY, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING 147 00:06:23,167 --> 00:06:25,367 IN THE TREE HOUSE NOW? 148 00:06:25,434 --> 00:06:26,734 COME ON! 149 00:06:26,801 --> 00:06:28,734 IT'S 10:00. GO HOME. 150 00:06:28,801 --> 00:06:30,667 JIM, WHILE I GOT YOU HERE, 151 00:06:30,734 --> 00:06:33,467 WHERE DO YOU WANT ME TO INSTALL THE PHONE JACKS? 152 00:06:34,968 --> 00:06:38,501 I CAN THINK OF ONE PLACE, ANDY. 153 00:06:42,167 --> 00:06:44,234 WHAT'S THAT? 154 00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:46,267 WELL, I GUESS THIS IS AS GOOD A TIME 155 00:06:46,334 --> 00:06:47,434 TO TELL YOU AS ANY. 156 00:06:47,501 --> 00:06:49,434 THIS IS A BOOK. 157 00:06:51,601 --> 00:06:54,367 WHAT'S IT ABOUT? 158 00:06:54,434 --> 00:06:56,300 OH, NOTHING. 159 00:06:56,367 --> 00:06:57,367 NOTHING, HUH? 160 00:06:57,434 --> 00:06:58,667 MM-HMM. 161 00:06:58,734 --> 00:07:00,000 NO. [ Laughing ] 162 00:07:00,067 --> 00:07:01,767 NOTHING. 163 00:07:01,834 --> 00:07:04,200 "THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO THE BAHAMAS"? 164 00:07:04,267 --> 00:07:06,701 YEAH, 'CAUSE WHEN WE GET THERE, 165 00:07:06,767 --> 00:07:10,167 I WANT TO KNOW WHERE ALL THE GOOD STUFF IS. 166 00:07:10,234 --> 00:07:12,167 CHERYL, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 167 00:07:12,234 --> 00:07:14,701 I'LL GIVE YOU A LITTLE HINT. 168 00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:17,200 WE'RE GOING TO THE BAHAMAS! 169 00:07:17,267 --> 00:07:19,901 JUST YOU AND ME. WE LEAVE IN THREE WEEKS. 170 00:07:19,968 --> 00:07:22,334 FOUR INCREDIBLE DAYS AT PARADISE ISLAND. 171 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:23,534 HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 172 00:07:23,601 --> 00:07:24,834 WE CAN'T DO THAT. 173 00:07:24,901 --> 00:07:25,834 I MEAN, I'VE GOT MY WORK. 174 00:07:25,901 --> 00:07:28,567 YOU'VE GOT YOUR...KIDS. 175 00:07:28,634 --> 00:07:30,067 IT'S ALL TAKEN CARE OF. 176 00:07:30,133 --> 00:07:31,434 DANA'S GONNA TAKE CARE OF THE KIDS, 177 00:07:31,501 --> 00:07:33,000 AND ANDY'S GONNA COVER FOR YOU AT WORK. 178 00:07:33,067 --> 00:07:35,200 BUT WE CAN'T AFFORD A VACATION. 179 00:07:35,267 --> 00:07:37,801 HONEY, I GOT A GREAT DEAL. 180 00:07:37,868 --> 00:07:39,634 GREAT? 181 00:07:39,701 --> 00:07:40,901 OFF-SEASON, MIDWEEK, 182 00:07:40,968 --> 00:07:44,734 LAYOVER, TIMESHARE, SEMINAR. 183 00:07:44,801 --> 00:07:46,834 WHAT ABOUT THE AIRFARE? 184 00:07:46,901 --> 00:07:48,767 I TOLD THEM WE WERE GOING TO A FUNERAL. 185 00:07:48,834 --> 00:07:50,100 THEY'RE TAKING OFF 50%. 186 00:07:51,968 --> 00:07:54,367 HONEY, DO YOU REALIZE THAT WE HAVEN'T BEEN ALONE 187 00:07:54,434 --> 00:07:56,534 SINCE RUBY WAS BORN? 188 00:07:58,334 --> 00:07:59,434 I KNOW. 189 00:07:59,501 --> 00:08:01,834 WELL, I GUESS IT COULD BE FUN. 190 00:08:01,901 --> 00:08:03,634 I MEAN, YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER REALLY SEEN 191 00:08:03,701 --> 00:08:06,467 THOSE COCONUT BRAS EXCEPT FOR IN PICTURES. 192 00:08:08,033 --> 00:08:10,434 OH, OH, HONEY, HONEY, HONEY... 193 00:08:10,501 --> 00:08:11,434 WHAT? 194 00:08:11,501 --> 00:08:12,434 BEFORE WE DO THIS... 195 00:08:12,501 --> 00:08:13,434 YES? 196 00:08:13,501 --> 00:08:14,801 COULD WE TALK? 197 00:08:14,868 --> 00:08:16,901 SURE. OKAY. 198 00:08:18,734 --> 00:08:21,334 [ WESTERN DRAWL ] WELL, HELLO, MA'AM, MY NAME IS BUCK. 199 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:23,033 HONEY, HONEY, HONEY, 200 00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:25,167 I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE TRIP. 201 00:08:25,234 --> 00:08:28,934 YOU KNOW HOW WE'RE ALWAYS RUSHING THROUGH SEX? 202 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,200 YEAH. 203 00:08:31,267 --> 00:08:32,868 WELL, I MEAN, I THOUGHT, 204 00:08:32,934 --> 00:08:35,234 WHAT IF WE HELD OFF FOR THREE WEEKS 205 00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:37,601 TILL WE GOT THERE? 206 00:08:37,667 --> 00:08:39,033 WHAT ARE YOU, NUTS? 207 00:08:39,100 --> 00:08:41,200 HONEY, HONEY, JUST THINK HOW ROMANTIC IT'LL BE 208 00:08:41,267 --> 00:08:42,434 WHEN WE'RE FINALLY ALONE. 209 00:08:42,501 --> 00:08:43,901 THREE WEEKS? 210 00:08:43,968 --> 00:08:46,400 WE DIDN'T WAIT THAT LONG THE FIRST TIME. 211 00:08:46,467 --> 00:08:49,133 BUT, HONEY, THIS IS GOING TO MAKE IT FEEL JUST LIKE THE FIRST TIME. 212 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:50,734 NO, IN ORDER TO FEEL LIKE THE FIRST TIME, 213 00:08:50,801 --> 00:08:53,067 WE NEED YOUR DAD, A BAT, AND SOME COPS. 214 00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:54,801 NO. NO WAY. 215 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,100 OH, COME ON. 216 00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:58,300 WHAT ARE YOU TELLING ME HERE? 217 00:08:58,367 --> 00:09:00,234 YOU WANT ME TO SPEND A LOT OF MONEY 218 00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:02,667 AND HAVE NO SEX FOR THREE WEEKS. 219 00:09:02,734 --> 00:09:04,801 IT'S LIKE I JUST HAD SURGERY. 220 00:09:04,868 --> 00:09:08,434 HONEY, YOU KNOW, IF WE DO HOLD OUT, 221 00:09:08,501 --> 00:09:12,000 I PROMISE YOU, BY THE TIME WE GET TO THE BAHAMAS, 222 00:09:12,067 --> 00:09:15,067 YOU'LL NEVER EVEN SEE THE BEACH. 223 00:09:16,167 --> 00:09:18,667 WALL TO WALL ACTION? 224 00:09:18,734 --> 00:09:20,434 OH, YEAH. 225 00:09:20,501 --> 00:09:23,267 OKAY. 226 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:32,067 LOOK WHAT I FOUND IN MY UNDERWEAR DRAWER. 227 00:09:32,133 --> 00:09:33,200 LET ME GUESS. 228 00:09:33,267 --> 00:09:34,734 ANOTHER LOVE NOTE FROM THE BUTT SCRATCHER. 229 00:09:36,234 --> 00:09:37,701 YOU KNOW, EVER SINCE WE STARTED 230 00:09:37,767 --> 00:09:40,567 THIS WHOLE HOLDING-OUT THING, HE'S BEEN SO ROMANTIC. 231 00:09:40,634 --> 00:09:41,667 YEAH, THERE'S NOTHING LIKE 232 00:09:41,734 --> 00:09:44,100 A GUY WHO'S NOT TAKING IT FOR GRANTED. 233 00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:47,367 LISTEN TO THIS. "DEAR CHERYL, 234 00:09:47,434 --> 00:09:49,467 "EVERYTHING GOOD IN MY LIFE IS BECAUSE OF YOU. 235 00:09:49,534 --> 00:09:52,167 I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART. JIM." 236 00:09:52,234 --> 00:09:53,634 THAT'S SWEET. I'M SURPRISED. 237 00:09:53,701 --> 00:09:55,033 OH, LOOK, THERE'S A LITTLE DRAWING ON THE BACK. 238 00:09:55,100 --> 00:09:58,100 WHY IS HE HOLDING A FLASHLIGHT? OHH! 239 00:09:58,167 --> 00:09:59,734 AAH! 240 00:09:59,801 --> 00:10:04,400 ANDY, THE TREE HOUSE DOES NOT NEED A SKYLIGHT. 241 00:10:04,467 --> 00:10:06,934 JIM, I HAVE AN ARCHITECT'S MIND. 242 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,133 I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BUILD CRAP. 243 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:10,868 YEAH? WELL, APPLY YOURSELF. 244 00:10:10,934 --> 00:10:12,267 FINE. WHY DON'T WE JUST SLAP TOGETHER 245 00:10:12,334 --> 00:10:14,100 A FLOOR AND SOME WALLS? 246 00:10:14,167 --> 00:10:15,634 YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THAT. 247 00:10:15,701 --> 00:10:17,567 THEN IT WOULD BE A TREE HOUSE! 248 00:10:17,634 --> 00:10:20,100 SOMEBODY DOESN'T WANT THE PASSWORD 249 00:10:20,167 --> 00:10:22,033 TO THE SECURITY SYSTEM! 250 00:10:28,300 --> 00:10:29,701 HEY. 251 00:10:29,767 --> 00:10:31,868 HEY. 252 00:10:33,701 --> 00:10:34,868 I LOVE YOU. 253 00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:36,434 I LOVE YOU. 254 00:10:38,834 --> 00:10:40,400 OOPS. 255 00:10:40,467 --> 00:10:42,100 SPILLED ON MY SHIRT. 256 00:10:54,300 --> 00:10:57,033 IS HE GONNA DO THIS UNTIL YOU LEAVE? 257 00:10:57,100 --> 00:10:58,434 DANA, IT'S JUST A WEEK. 258 00:10:58,501 --> 00:11:00,000 NO, YOUR TRIP'S IN TWO WEEKS. 259 00:11:00,067 --> 00:11:01,734 NO, WE LEAVE IN A WEEK. 260 00:11:01,801 --> 00:11:03,167 UH-OH. 261 00:11:03,234 --> 00:11:04,467 DANA, I WAS VERY CLEAR WITH YOU. 262 00:11:04,534 --> 00:11:05,601 NO, I WROTE IT DOWN ON A PIECE OF PAPER. 263 00:11:05,667 --> 00:11:08,000 I WAS VERY SPECIFIC ABOUT OUR SCHEDULE. 264 00:11:08,067 --> 00:11:09,334 LOOK, I REMEMBER YOU SAID YOU WERE LEAVING 265 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:11,968 THE DAY AFTER MOM'S BIRTHDAY. THAT'S THE 23rd. 266 00:11:12,033 --> 00:11:13,501 THAT'S THE 16th, 267 00:11:13,567 --> 00:11:15,100 WHICH I SHOULD HAVE REALIZED YOU WOULDN'T KNOW 268 00:11:15,167 --> 00:11:16,868 BECAUSE I ALWAYS BUY HER PRESENT. 269 00:11:16,934 --> 00:11:19,467 I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU'RE MAKING THIS ABOUT YOU. 270 00:11:23,300 --> 00:11:25,868 DANA, YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR SCHEDULE. 271 00:11:25,934 --> 00:11:28,234 WELL, I CAN'T. I'M GONNA BE IN NEW YORK ON BUSINESS. 272 00:11:28,300 --> 00:11:29,501 CAN'T YOU CHANGE YOUR TRIP? 273 00:11:29,567 --> 00:11:31,133 NO, DANA, IT'S A WHOLE PACKAGE! 274 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,501 IN A FEW WEEKS, HURRICANE SEASON'S GOING TO BE OVER 275 00:11:33,567 --> 00:11:36,400 AND PRICES ARE GOING TO SKYROCKET. 276 00:11:36,467 --> 00:11:39,634 CAN'T YOU ASK ANDY TO WATCH THE KIDS? 277 00:11:39,701 --> 00:11:41,467 Andy: GIVE ME BACK MY HAMMER! 278 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:44,100 ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME CRY, JIM? 279 00:11:44,167 --> 00:11:46,267 GIVE IT! GIVE IT! 280 00:11:46,334 --> 00:11:47,901 DON'T LOOK AT ME! 281 00:11:50,701 --> 00:11:52,968 I'M JUST GONNA HAVE TO TELL JIM THE TRIP IS OFF. 282 00:11:53,033 --> 00:11:54,400 HEY. 283 00:11:54,467 --> 00:11:56,200 HEY. 284 00:11:56,267 --> 00:11:57,868 THIS IS FOR YOU. 285 00:11:57,934 --> 00:11:59,901 OH... 286 00:11:59,968 --> 00:12:01,567 NO MATTER HOW BEAUTIFUL THIS ROSE IS, 287 00:12:01,634 --> 00:12:09,200 IT CAN'T COMPARE TO THE BEAUTIFUL...NESS 288 00:12:09,267 --> 00:12:10,400 OF YOU. 289 00:12:10,467 --> 00:12:11,968 OH... 290 00:12:17,334 --> 00:12:18,267 LOVE YOU. 291 00:12:18,334 --> 00:12:19,334 [ SIGHS ] 292 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:20,467 LOVE YOU. 293 00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:28,801 MAYBE I'LL TELL HIM TOMORROW. 294 00:12:35,067 --> 00:12:36,400 I GOT YOUR HAMMER NOW! 295 00:12:36,467 --> 00:12:37,834 HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT? 296 00:12:42,667 --> 00:12:48,033 [ MUSIC PLAYING ] 297 00:12:54,234 --> 00:12:55,901 MAY I HAVE THIS DANCE? 298 00:12:55,968 --> 00:12:57,467 OH, JIM, I -- 299 00:12:57,534 --> 00:12:58,467 SHH. 300 00:12:58,534 --> 00:13:00,501 NO WORDS. 301 00:13:04,234 --> 00:13:07,467 OH, JIM, WE REALLY HAVE TO DISCUSS SOMETHING. 302 00:13:07,534 --> 00:13:08,767 I KNOW, I KNOW. 303 00:13:08,834 --> 00:13:10,467 ONLY ONE BEER ON THE PLANE. 304 00:13:13,267 --> 00:13:16,534 OH, HONEY, UM... 305 00:13:16,601 --> 00:13:17,934 WE'RE NOT GOING ON THE TRIP. 306 00:13:19,901 --> 00:13:21,634 WHAT? 307 00:13:21,701 --> 00:13:24,133 THERE WAS A SCREW-UP WITH DANA'S SCHEDULE, 308 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:26,300 AND SHE CAN'T WATCH THE KIDS. I HAD TO CANCEL. 309 00:13:26,367 --> 00:13:29,167 OH, MAN, WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN? 310 00:13:29,234 --> 00:13:31,767 WELL... THREE DAYS AGO. 311 00:13:32,901 --> 00:13:35,801 YOU'VE KNOWN ABOUT THIS FOR THREE DAYS? 312 00:13:35,868 --> 00:13:37,000 WELL, YEAH, BUT, HONEY, 313 00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:39,367 I'D TRY TO TELL YOU AND YOU'D -- 314 00:13:39,434 --> 00:13:43,334 YOU'D WRITE ME A POEM OR BRING ME A ROSE, 315 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,133 ASK ME TO DANCE. 316 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:48,667 AND I JUST DIDN'T WANT IT TO END. I'M SORRY. 317 00:13:48,734 --> 00:13:50,033 OH, I'M SORRY, TOO. 318 00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:51,400 I WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO IT, HONEY. 319 00:13:51,467 --> 00:13:53,000 YEAH. 320 00:13:53,067 --> 00:13:55,234 OKAY. LET'S HAVE SEX. 321 00:13:57,934 --> 00:13:59,267 WHAT? 322 00:13:59,334 --> 00:14:00,767 DO THE MATH. 323 00:14:00,834 --> 00:14:02,400 YOU OWE ME THREE DAYS' WORTH. 324 00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:04,400 I OWE YOU? 325 00:14:04,467 --> 00:14:06,100 YEAH. YOU BETTER GET STARTED. 326 00:14:06,167 --> 00:14:08,100 YOU GOT CHILDREN TO RAISE. 327 00:14:08,167 --> 00:14:09,167 OKAY, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. 328 00:14:09,234 --> 00:14:11,367 THESE PAST FEW DAYS HAVE BEEN -- 329 00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,968 BEEN SO SPECIAL TO ME. 330 00:14:13,033 --> 00:14:14,767 IT'S LIKE YOU WERE COURTING ME AGAIN. 331 00:14:14,834 --> 00:14:16,234 WHAT, IS THAT OUT THE WINDOW? 332 00:14:16,300 --> 00:14:18,567 NO, I WAS GONNA KISS YOU. 333 00:14:18,634 --> 00:14:20,534 YOU ARE UNBELIEVABLE. 334 00:14:20,601 --> 00:14:22,834 I KNOW, AND I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED. 335 00:14:26,868 --> 00:14:28,167 ALL RIGHT. 336 00:14:30,667 --> 00:14:32,801 GO AHEAD. TAKE ME. 337 00:14:32,868 --> 00:14:34,734 DO WHAT YOU WANT. 338 00:14:34,801 --> 00:14:36,934 YES! 339 00:14:38,801 --> 00:14:41,567 COULD YOU BE MORE INSENSITIVE? 340 00:14:41,634 --> 00:14:43,901 WOULD IT MAKE YOU HOTTER? 341 00:14:43,968 --> 00:14:46,033 WHAT? CHERYL? 342 00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:47,868 "WHAT?" CHERYL, COME ON. 343 00:14:47,934 --> 00:14:49,601 YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S BEEN LYING ABOUT THIS 344 00:14:49,667 --> 00:14:53,334 FOR THREE DAYS, AND I'M THE ONE IN TROUBLE? 345 00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:54,901 Andy: WOMEN. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 346 00:14:54,968 --> 00:14:56,267 ANDY! 347 00:15:02,834 --> 00:15:05,234 OKAY, ALL YOU DO IS GO UP TO YOUR DAD 348 00:15:05,300 --> 00:15:07,934 AND SAY, "DADDY, WE THINK THAT CROWN MOLDING 349 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,501 "WILL ADD AN AIR OF TIMELESS ELEGANCE 350 00:15:11,567 --> 00:15:13,033 TO OUR TREE HOUSE." 351 00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:15,067 CAN YOU DO THAT? 352 00:15:15,133 --> 00:15:16,734 YOU SMELL LIKE CHICKEN. 353 00:15:23,534 --> 00:15:25,267 HEY. 354 00:15:25,334 --> 00:15:26,968 HELLO. 355 00:15:29,167 --> 00:15:31,667 HEY, JIM, SHE'S NOT MOVING. JUMP ON HER. 356 00:15:38,534 --> 00:15:41,601 THAT'S GREAT. THAT'S REALLY GREAT. 357 00:15:41,667 --> 00:15:43,734 EVERYONE IN YOUR FAMILY 358 00:15:43,801 --> 00:15:46,167 ALWAYS HAS TO KNOW ABOUT OUR PRIVATE STUFF. 359 00:15:46,234 --> 00:15:47,534 OH, BELIEVE ME, IT'S NO NEWS FLASH 360 00:15:47,601 --> 00:15:49,334 THAT ALL GUYS CARE ABOUT IS SEX. 361 00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:50,501 THANK YOU. 362 00:15:50,567 --> 00:15:52,901 AND ANY GUY THAT TELLS YOU ANYTHING DIFFERENT 363 00:15:52,968 --> 00:15:56,601 IS EITHER LYING OR JUST HAD SEX. 364 00:15:56,667 --> 00:15:59,400 SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT THESE PAST FEW DAYS 365 00:15:59,467 --> 00:16:01,667 WHEN YOU'VE BEEN SO ROMANTIC, 366 00:16:01,734 --> 00:16:03,801 ALL YOU REALLY CARED ABOUT WAS GETTING SOME? 367 00:16:03,868 --> 00:16:05,200 YES! 368 00:16:05,267 --> 00:16:06,667 WELL, THAT WAS OUR AGREEMENT -- 369 00:16:06,734 --> 00:16:11,100 NO-GETTIN'-SOME, THEN A LOTTA SOME. 370 00:16:11,167 --> 00:16:13,567 THAT'S BEAUTIFUL, JIM. 371 00:16:13,634 --> 00:16:16,033 OH, COME ON, CHERYL. I WAS JUST BEING HONEST WITH YOU. 372 00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:17,701 I MEAN, ALL GUYS ARE LIKE THAT. 373 00:16:17,767 --> 00:16:19,167 THAT'S WHY WE OPEN DOORS FOR YOU. 374 00:16:19,234 --> 00:16:20,567 THAT'S WHY WE SEND YOU FLOWERS. 375 00:16:20,634 --> 00:16:22,234 THAT'S WHY WE REMEMBER YOUR NAMES. 376 00:16:23,601 --> 00:16:25,133 OH, COME ON! 377 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:26,567 THE FIRST NIGHT WE MET, YOU TOLD ME 378 00:16:26,634 --> 00:16:28,467 THAT EVEN IF YOU NEVER SAW ME AGAIN, 379 00:16:28,534 --> 00:16:31,868 IT WAS ENOUGH JUST TO KNOW THAT A WOMAN LIKE ME EXISTED. 380 00:16:31,934 --> 00:16:33,901 WELL, HONEY, I SAID THAT TO A BUNCH OF WOMEN THAT NIGHT. 381 00:16:33,968 --> 00:16:35,434 REALLY? 382 00:16:35,501 --> 00:16:37,734 CHERYL, THE WAY YOU WERE LOOKING AT ME, 383 00:16:37,801 --> 00:16:41,300 YOU WERE THERE FOR THE EXACT SAME REASON I WAS. 384 00:16:41,367 --> 00:16:42,567 GUESS WHAT. 385 00:16:42,634 --> 00:16:44,000 I WASN'T EVEN LOOKING AT YOU. 386 00:16:44,067 --> 00:16:46,033 CHERYL. COME ON, CHERYL. 387 00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:48,200 YOU WERE PRACTICALLY DROOLING ALL OVER ME. 388 00:16:48,267 --> 00:16:49,667 ACTUALLY... CHERYL, DON'T TELL HIM -- 389 00:16:49,734 --> 00:16:52,067 I WAS DROOLING OVER THE GUY BEHIND YOU. 390 00:16:52,133 --> 00:16:53,934 YOU WERE IN THE WAY. 391 00:16:59,534 --> 00:17:02,000 OKAY. 392 00:17:02,067 --> 00:17:04,634 THAT'S GOOD TO KNOW. 393 00:17:04,701 --> 00:17:06,868 SINCE EVERYBODY ELSE DOES. 394 00:17:08,534 --> 00:17:10,234 OHH. 395 00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,501 I CAN'T BELIEVE I SAID THAT. 396 00:17:12,567 --> 00:17:17,501 CHERYL, AS YOUR BROTHER, MAYBE I CAN HELP. 397 00:17:17,567 --> 00:17:20,834 I THINK WHAT JIM NEEDS FROM YOU RIGHT NOW IS... 398 00:17:20,901 --> 00:17:23,300 IS ABOUT 50 LINEAR FEET OF CROWN MOLDING. 399 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,100 KIDS? 400 00:17:34,434 --> 00:17:36,934 CHERYL? 401 00:17:38,434 --> 00:17:40,534 ANYBODY? 402 00:17:46,934 --> 00:17:49,100 "PLAY ME." 403 00:17:49,167 --> 00:17:50,100 HMM. 404 00:17:53,634 --> 00:17:55,100 Cheryl, on video: HI, JIM. 405 00:17:55,167 --> 00:17:58,667 I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET, AND I FEEL BAD ABOUT THAT. 406 00:17:58,734 --> 00:18:01,334 I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT THING. 407 00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:05,200 AND I REALLY WANT TO MAKE IT UP TO YOU. 408 00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:09,834 GRACIE, STOP LICKING YOUR SISTER! 409 00:18:09,901 --> 00:18:12,734 Gracie: SHE LICKED ME FIRST! 410 00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:14,734 I DON'T CARE! 411 00:18:16,467 --> 00:18:18,000 ANYWAY... 412 00:18:19,467 --> 00:18:23,167 I WANT YOU TO MEET ME UP IN THE TREE HOUSE. 413 00:18:23,234 --> 00:18:26,033 I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU. 414 00:18:26,100 --> 00:18:29,601 I GOTTA GO. GOODBYE. 415 00:18:30,934 --> 00:18:34,200 [ THUNDER ] 416 00:18:35,734 --> 00:18:37,667 HI. 417 00:18:39,767 --> 00:18:41,567 I GOT YOUR TAPE. 418 00:18:44,534 --> 00:18:47,801 YOU SURE YOU WANT ME HERE AND NOT THAT OTHER GUY? 419 00:18:47,868 --> 00:18:49,067 WHAT GUY? 420 00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:50,534 THE GUY, THE GUY -- YOU KNOW THE GUY. 421 00:18:50,601 --> 00:18:52,300 THE GUY BEHIND ME. THE GUY IF I EVER MEET HIM, 422 00:18:52,367 --> 00:18:54,234 I'M GONNA KICK HIS BUTT. THAT GUY. 423 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:58,834 HONEY, I LOOKED AT HIM FOR TWO SECONDS. 424 00:18:58,901 --> 00:19:02,100 I SPENT THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU. 425 00:19:02,167 --> 00:19:04,567 OH, I'M SORRY. 426 00:19:04,634 --> 00:19:07,200 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. 427 00:19:07,267 --> 00:19:10,667 WELL, ALL RIGHT. 428 00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:15,133 SINCE YOU'RE NEW AT THIS "I'VE DONE SOMETHING STUPID 429 00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:16,968 AND I WANT TO MAKE IT UP TO YOU" THING, 430 00:19:17,033 --> 00:19:20,901 I GUESS I CAN WALK YOU THROUGH THE STEPS. 431 00:19:20,968 --> 00:19:24,467 YOU KNOW, WHY DON'T WE SEE HOW I DO ON MY OWN? 432 00:19:26,701 --> 00:19:28,634 WHOA! 433 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:32,033 YOU JUST SKIPPED TO STEP FIVE. 434 00:19:34,567 --> 00:19:36,000 I LOVE MY LIFE WITH YOU 435 00:19:36,067 --> 00:19:37,701 AND OUR BEAUTIFUL KIDS 436 00:19:37,767 --> 00:19:41,234 AND THIS RIDICULOUSLY OVER-THE-TOP TREE HOUSE. 437 00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:43,868 YEAH. I WAS THINKING OF MOVING IN HERE 438 00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:45,934 AND GIVING THE HOUSE TO THE KIDS. 439 00:19:47,534 --> 00:19:50,501 SO, HONEY... HMM? 440 00:19:50,567 --> 00:19:53,601 HOW MANY WOMEN DID YOU HIT ON THAT NIGHT? 441 00:19:53,667 --> 00:19:55,367 FIVE. 442 00:19:55,434 --> 00:19:56,734 ALTHOUGH IT TURNS OUT ONE OF THEM 443 00:19:56,801 --> 00:19:58,367 WASN'T APPARENTLY A WOMAN. 444 00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:03,667 AHEM. 445 00:20:03,734 --> 00:20:05,367 ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT TO CONFESS? 446 00:20:05,434 --> 00:20:09,334 YOU MEAN ABOUT THAT NIGHT, OR LIFE IN GENERAL? 447 00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:10,801 LET'S OPEN IT UP. 448 00:20:10,868 --> 00:20:12,434 OPEN IT UP? OH, YEAH. 449 00:20:12,501 --> 00:20:15,667 WELL, UH, OKAY. 450 00:20:15,734 --> 00:20:18,400 I WASN'T REALLY SCOUTED BY THE CUBS 451 00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,200 WHEN I WAS ON THE HIGH SCHOOL BASEBALL TEAM. 452 00:20:20,267 --> 00:20:22,834 WOW. ANYTHING ELSE? 453 00:20:24,100 --> 00:20:27,601 I WASN'T ON THE HIGH SCHOOL BASEBALL TEAM. 454 00:20:29,033 --> 00:20:31,901 ANYTHING YOU WANT TO SPILL? 455 00:20:31,968 --> 00:20:35,968 I WAS NEVER A VOLUNTEER FIREWOMAN IN COLLEGE. 456 00:20:37,133 --> 00:20:40,434 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANYMORE. 457 00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:46,267 LISTEN TO THE RAIN. 458 00:20:46,334 --> 00:20:49,968 IT'S JUST LIKE IT WAS THAT FIRST NIGHT. 459 00:20:56,634 --> 00:20:57,801 YEAH. 460 00:21:02,567 --> 00:21:06,901 HOW LONG DO YOU WANT TO LISTEN TO THE RAIN? 461 00:21:06,968 --> 00:21:08,000 ALL NIGHT. 462 00:21:11,467 --> 00:21:14,834 BUT I CAN DO TWO THINGS AT ONCE. 463 00:21:14,901 --> 00:21:18,000 I SURE HOPE ONE OF THEM IS SEX. 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 31515

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